The Golden Hour - I'm Bat-Them |The Golden Hour #32 w/ Brendan Schaub, Erik Griffin & Chris D'Elia
Episode Date: June 9, 2023The guys talk rich people problems, Austin Powers, Matt Rife's crazy rise and glow-up, how much money buys overall happiness, David Guetta ending discrimination, cringe video reac...tions, Survivor TV Show audition tips, which celebrities the guys would fight and much more! DraftKings - Download the DraftKings app and use promo code FIGHTER ExpressVPN - https://expressvpn.com/GOLDEN Black Buffalo - https://blackbuffalo.com with promo code GOLDEN Blue Nile - https://bluenile.com with promo code GOLDEN Gambling problem? Call 1-800-Gambler. In Massachusetts, call (800) 327-5050 or visit gambling help line m a dot org, In New York, call 877-8-HOPENY or text HOPENY (467369). In Kansas, call 1-800-522-4700. On behalf of Boot Hill Casino & Resort (KS). 21+ in most eligible states but age varies by jurisdiction. Eligibility restrictions apply. See draftkings dot com slash sportsbook for details and state specific responsible gambling resources. Bonus bets expire seven days after issuance. Opt-in and 10+ leg req. for 100% boost. Eligibility, wagering, and deposit restrictions apply. Terms at sportsbook dot draftkings dot com slash basketball terms.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Dude, I'm sure they're great. I have no idea if they're great or not.
He can sing.
Yeah, but like...
He plays guitar, right? Or something like that?
He's the lead singer. That boy can sing.
Really? He's the lead singer?
Yeah.
Alright.
I wish it was Patreon because we could bond over it, dude.
We're friends that laugh.
We're friends that shout.
Sometimes we don't know what we're talking about.
But that won't stop us
Nothing can stop us
Cause I can show you used to love
Just rebrand it enough
It's stronger, better, bigger power
Cause it is the Golden Hour
It's the Golden Hour Oh my god.
Oh god.
You're a monster.
It's not.
You're a monster.
Austin Powers is.
It's not bad.
It's not bad.
It's so original.
It's fine.
It's funny.
It's just. It's funny.
I think you're just saying this because you like to be contrary.
You like the drama.
So you're over here like, everybody's like,
hey, Austin Powers is funny. Then you gotta be like,
You know what I call that?
Good podcasting.
I'm not saying... Be a real person.
I'm not saying it's bad.
This isn't congratulations right now
you know what I mean
you gotta be like
that is a good podcast
this is Chris on congratulations
yeah yeah yeah
that's a good podcast
last episode of congratulations
are we recording
last episode of congratulations
was one of the best ones
in a long time
I'm telling you
and I'm not just saying that
so
I'll read the comments
yeah read them
I will
okay
and I'll decide from there
yeah go ahead
it's funny?
It's all Brendan's comments.
It's all, it's me?
What are you doing, Brendan?
A bunch of burner accounts?
No, it just fucking says Brendan's job.
It's from Golden Hour, too.
Brendan.
Then the next one, Brendan from Fire and the Kid.
It's just boo.
And bad spelling.
You're like, dude, it's clearly you.
Yeah, it's you, dude.
No, it was a good one.
It was funny.
It was good.
So go check it out. But anyway, whatever. I'll be in Tucson coming up. ChrisLeah.com. it was a good one. It was funny. It was good. So go check it out.
But anyway, whatever.
I'll be in Tucson coming up, chrislea.com.
I'll be in Colorado, chrislea.com.
And I'll be in a bunch of different places, Montreal, Nashville.
Okay, go to chrislea.com.
June 21st, Nashville, one night at Zaney's, guys.
Come on, let's sell this bitch out.
You will, you will.
Sell yourself, Nashville.
Zaney's.
Who knows?
Let's do it, daddy.
I got to hit up Theo. Theo, where you at, buddy? You will, you will sell this bitch out. You will. Sell yourself, Nashville. Who knows? Let's do it, daddy.
I got to hit up Theo.
Theo, where you at, buddy?
You will.
Come say hi.
You will.
Who else?
Jelly Rolls out there?
I see some guys that go through.
Yeah, nice.
Oh, you know what you need to do?
Will, you watch the show Compton.
Do Bustin' with the Boys.
Those are my guys.
Are they in Nashville?
Yeah, hell yeah. You know what?
Those are my boys.
Nashville guys.
I need to make this happen.
I got you.
Nashville, come on out, Tennessee.
And then Huntsville that weekend.
So if you all knew Alabama.
That one I can't help, and that one's going to be tough.
Who can?
Huntsville.
I played that once.
It was fun.
It's a nice little town.
That was a while ago, right?
Oh, a long time ago.
It was the only weekend I had a bus.
I never used a bus before.
I remember this for some reason.
Do you?
Yes.
Wow.
And I didn't – I was like, I think a bus would be awesome, but I don't know.
It's more expensive to use a bus.
And I was like, dude, I'm not a bus guy.
I'm not a bus guy.
I can't even – I was just thinking that.
I was just thinking, you want a bus?
It's like a big tour bus?
A big tour bus, yeah.
And it just – there was a shower and all that stuff.
I never felt clean. you know what was awesome driving overnight in the bed is awesome
because you got that hum and you're just kind of rocking bro you sleep you you sleep forever and
hard and you know and you fit in the bed you fit in the bed yeah you would i rent the rv with the
family no well rv is different than a bus bro just true bigger yeah yeah way bigger
this rv was 40 matt rife getting a bus is he yeah well because he's on tour never stop he's never
stopping he's doing every weekend his tour dates that's why that's why you get his tour dates were
i know he posted i'm like bro and shout out to him did you see that funny video we did with
ashton kutcher yeah yeah insane he told me he's like ashton kutcher is just a fan yeah i know
and his wife's a fan yeah and then they and they just like hit him up like and he's like, Ashton Kutcher is just a fan. Yeah, I know. And his wife's a fan. And they just hit him up.
And he was like, well, hey, you want to do this?
And I was like, dude, they're fans of you.
It's so great.
But anyway, shout out to my boy.
It was so good.
He broke Ticketmaster like Taylor Swift this morning because this thing went on sale.
I think that's now a publicity stunt.
Yeah, I do too.
Scroll down.
Yeah, because you think they'd figure it out by now, right?
That boy is fine.
Go down to the fucking picture, dude.
Of him? Look at him.
You see his body.
He looks like
it's insane.
God bless, bro.
I want to kiss him.
I'll suck him.
I have a picture of him when he was like,
when he was like 15, it's so funny.
His teeth were all jacked up.
He was like scrawny.
And now he's like this.
Glow up, dude.
The glow up, bro.
That's it, bro.
The glow up.
We're glowing down, aren't we?
Fucking love glow ups.
I love that dude.
I love that dude.
Glow ups?
Yeah, he's a great dude.
It's just fucking, you know.
That's it great dude. It's just fucking, you know. That's it, dude.
But I saw.
Fucking goddamn on my ring.
Too much power?
Yeah.
So I didn't wear those rings.
But it's all good, dude.
Just the one ring.
I saw some fan.
That's too thick.
I saw some fan.
We do a lot of tour dates.
I saw Matt Rice.
I'm like, got that dude.
And I saw some fan was like, you're going to burn out, bro.
I'm worried about you.
And he's like, nah.
I'd burn out.
Nah.
I'd burn out.
He's got to do that one time.
Let him do it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
They paid him a lot of money.
Oh, yeah.
When you sign that deal, they're like, okay.
It's all good for you, man.
We're going to get ours.
That's Live Nation.
I might go on some of those dates with him.
Because I want to film him doing stuff.
Yeah, hopefully he fits in one of the 500 dates.
But that's Live Nation.
Well, I directed his special, so check out his new special, too.
Well, I'm trying to say something, and you keep it.
Go ahead, though.
Do promote that.
Just say ChrisDeLea.com, you know what I mean?
No, no, no.
Do say it.
Do say it.
Say it, because that's cool.
Yeah, I directed his special, so go check out.
Sorry, I didn't mean to.
No, you're good.
I have one good thing I did.
No, you don't.
You have plenty of good stuff
You did dude
Workaholics
You got two gamer chairs
Two gamer chairs
New mattress
Oh we got a new mattress
We got a Tempur-Pedic
It's great
I was just
Before I left
I was like
Is it the one that does
Goes up
You can go zero G
That's a waste of money
And when you snore
It recognizes it
And then puts you up are you rich
you rich rich
it dude back bomb ass mattresses are a waste of money no you see especially your guy that sleeps
yeah bro i sleep wherever bro you have an expensive mattress there's no i have you know what i have
no idea how much my mattress costs.
That's your problem.
But I got it a long time ago though. So maybe it wasn't that much money.
I don't know.
You're supposed to like flip it every what?
10 years or something.
Oh,
if you're a pussy,
come on,
flip it.
You're supposed to flip it.
Especially for big guys.
We're supposed to flip it.
You're supposed to flip it because the cushion is,
it goes,
I don't know.
I don't know either.
It sounds like a fucking old wives.
I got my mattress for free from all my,
all my answers.
All my mattresses end up looking like...
I had a Helix mattress, too.
We just got rid of it.
Yeah.
But your mattress ends up looking like what were you going to say?
Like a canoe.
That's funny.
Your wife gets in, just rolls.
Yeah, she just...
You both roll.
But now we got two separate because it's like...
His and hers.
Yeah.
Once or twice a year.
That's a Dwayne Wade ad, right?
Rotate 180 degrees once or twice a year.
That's crazy. I've never done that in my lifeate 180 degrees once or twice a year. That's crazy.
I've never done that in my life. I'm not going to start now. Me neither. I've got to start. I sleep
great. I've got to start doing that. I told you guys I went
to this...
We're going mattress shopping
and Rachel goes...
This is what she does. Show Google this kind
of thing. Most expensive
luxurious mattress near
me. Not Bass Mattress? No. Most expensive thing most expensive yeah luxurious mattress near me okay not bass mattress no most expensive
bass so we go to this store we go to this store called hastens right hastens it's like and the
guy is like foreign you know it's like it's on a car yeah yeah it's like oh you know and then you
know you would you like a cup but you know you know and then we're like you know i'm laying in
a bed and i'm like god damn this is dope you get what you pay like a cappuccino. And then we're like, you know, I'm laying in a bed and I'm like, God damn, this is dope.
You get what you pay for.
If it gets too hot, you roll down the window.
It has windows?
And then the guy says, I go, just casually, I'm like, yeah, so how much is this?
And he says, $70,000.
Checklist.
Are you fucking serious?
Listen to me.
Listen to me right now.
Are you serious?
This is me.
I'm like this.
Okay.
He didn't say $70,000.
Yeah.
I'm in his bed like, nah, he didn't.
And then I thought maybe he said $7,000 because he's got an accent.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And then he says, and the one next to us, he says, and that's the base model.
The base?
The base model.
He goes, this one's $51,000.
He said it clearly.
Then I was like, oh, he did say $70,000.
What's it made out of? Dude, horse hair. Really? And like, yeah. It's made out of horse hair He said it clearly. Then I was like, oh, he did say $70,000. What's it made out of?
Dude, horse hair.
Really?
And like, yeah.
It's made out of horse hair.
Babies?
Dude.
And then I am like this.
I don't even want to look at Rachel.
You know what I mean?
Because I'm like, $70,000.
Okay.
And then I just say to the guy, I go, thank you so much for the presentation, Rachel.
You know?
Then we leave. Do you strong arm it? Get your ass up. I just say to the guy, I go, thank you so much for the presentation, Rachel.
Then we leave. Because.
Do you strong arm or get your ass up?
I didn't wanna be like that
because I didn't want this guy to know that I,
I wanted him to think I can afford to say
that I don't want to.
It's embarrassing.
Yeah, it's embarrassing.
So I didn't wanna be, but I wanted to be like this.
$70,000, motherfucker, please.
Never, never. Never. Never.
I didn't want to be like that.
But that was my...
So we go outside and I'm telling Rachel like, what are we doing here?
Right.
You don't have $70,000?
Did she...
Okay.
Now, say you said, let's get it.
She would just be like, yeah, awesome.
Oh, for three weeks she was like, we need to get that mattress.
A $70,000?
That's crazy.
And then Drake.
You know how many times you're going to have to go to Alabama?
No, but check this out.
There's an article about Drake.
He bought a mattress from the same place.
It's the same company.
Oh, wow.
And this shit was like $300,000.
Oh, what a rip.
Oh, I bet that bed is lit, though.
For $300,000, it better come with.
I bet it's lit.
You ever seen Shaq's bed?
A house.
You ever seen Shaq's bed that he put in his side piece's house?
Because he was staying over there so much,
he was like,
I don't fit on your bed.
So he,
God damn,
that bed's lit.
There you go.
But it's stupid
because you don't even see the mattress.
You put sheets over it.
So it has that dope ass design.
Hold on, hold on.
I would sleep on the black mattress.
Hold on, hold on.
It'd have cum stains all over it.
Hold on, hold on, hold on.
Hold on.
What?
So,
Shaq and his side piece bed?
He bought his side piece a mattress?
Yeah, but.
How do you know this?
Look it up.
All right, I want to look it up.
I'm not saying, but.
It's just.
Wait, hold on.
So, and this is known?
So what about, so his wife knows.
Oh, he had a good divorce.
Yeah.
Oh, he got a divorce.
He was like, I chewed so many times, I made a mistake.
Oh, really?
It's Shaq, right?
No, I know, I know.
He's at Staples Center.
There's a statue.
No, I know.
You don't have one girlfriend, you're on Staples like this, right?
Of course, yeah.
You're getting your dick sucked all the time.
Right, right.
So he couldn't sleep in the bed because he's too big.
He's 7'2".
I think he knows.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Hey, hey.
I looked it up.
75% of men cheat, by the way.
Don't act like you're all surprised, right?
No, I'm not surprised.
No, I'm not surprised.
But he was like, I can't sleep in your bed.
I can't stay over because I can't fit in your bed.
And then she said next day, just these guys showed up.
Giant mattress.
Like the size of the room.
She didn't have a room anymore.
She's like, you want me staying over?
Well, I guess you would have to.
If you're 7'3", you would have to get a custom mattress.
Well, for sure.
That's what it does, right?
Yeah.
Or you sleep on a trampoline outside.
And then you're like, but also you're a professional athlete at the time, right?
So you have to. Sleep well. You have to sleep well. Well, they're like, but also you're a professional athlete at the time, right? So you have to.
Sleep well.
You have to sleep well.
Well, they'd probably pay for the matches if you wanted to, the NBA.
Or the fucking Lakers, whatever the fuck team.
Oh, that's true.
Yeah.
It's probably in the contract.
I need to have our matches.
You could.
You know Shaq's such a brilliant businessman.
You know he owns Forever 21?
He does?
All of them.
Yep.
All of them.
You like that?
You ever seen it?
I looked it up.
It said he made.
This is always wrong, but it says he's worth like $300 million. More than that. More than that. You ever seen it? I looked it up and said he made, this is always wrong,
but it says he's worth like 300 million.
More than that.
More than that.
Yeah.
Who knows?
No, Kenny Smith was talking about it.
They're like,
the thing about Shaq is like,
people don't realize he's,
they get to talk about Magic Johnson.
Yeah.
But Shaq,
he goes,
you know Forever 21?
They're like,
yeah, he owns that.
Bought it years ago.
Yeah.
Second largest investment company
that owns Reebok,
James Bender.
Wow.
Wow.
Well, he also like,
remember his like, shoe that he made?
Yep.
He always wanted to be like, I'm going to make this shoe and it's going to be affordable.
Affordable, right.
But he still made a ton of money.
Yeah.
And then he checked out.
Yeah.
Stefan Marbury did that.
He was trying to do a shoe in China.
Because Shaq did the terrible shoe with Reebok.
It was all right.
It wasn't that bad.
I had the circles.
But now people kind of are like, what Shaq does for people is fucking cool.
Like, he makes shit affordable.
Yeah.
You know, he's a good guy.
Well, anybody can do that.
Like, how much?
Okay.
For instance, like, Elon Musk, he's worth $300 billion.
So, like, it's like, don't tell me you don't care about money.
Because if you sell a $100,000 car, all you care about is money.
Yeah, right.
Because I'm saying he could have made that car $45,000,
and now he only has $100 million.
Right, I know.
Well, it depends how much the car costs at wholesale to make with the engine.
Yeah, of course.
Getting the cobalt and all that shit.
If it amassed $300 billion, he could have amassed $100 billion,
and then maybe more people would have.
Who knows?
If you have over a billion dollars, you're a piece of shit.
You're a smart piece of shit.
Yeah.
I'm not saying I'm not smart.
I'm looking to be a piece of shit.
But you're a piece of shit.
Like, dude, you have a billion dollars, you're a piece of shit. Like, dude, you have a billion dollars.
You're a piece of shit.
Have less money.
Help.
There's some guy who's close to a trillion, though.
Piece of shit.
A trillion.
He'll be the first trillion.
He's a piece of shit.
Well, that's...
Where is he?
Saudi Arabia?
If you make a product...
No, it's either the Mexico guy or...
The company that does the chips that we're using for all the AI shit, it's in America.
That company's gone on a trail.
Well, if the Walmart guy was alive, it would be them.
The Walmart family's alive.
The Walmart family.
They own the Broncos.
Well, what's the Jeff Bezos' boat?
It's like $500 million or something?
His boat?
That's not shit, man.
Piece of shit.
No, I know, but that's a piece of shit. Bro make how about people you provide a product i get that bro bro are you
listening to 500 million dollars like this is like he would take a if he lost 500 million dollars in
one day he'd be like oh shit doesn't matter uh do you guys what do you want to eat that's what he
would be like yeah you know doesn't he deserve that though?
He came up with Amazon.
I'm not saying,
do you get the packages?
And I'm not saying,
by the way,
I'm being ingest here.
I don't know if I would do it differently,
but like,
and I'm sure maybe he donates.
I have no idea,
but like,
well,
he said he wanted to give half his fortune away to,
you could save.
No,
he does donate.
He gave half his fortune away when he got a divorce.
I agree with you 100%, man.
It's like you go, what is the distribution of wealth?
How does it work?
But it's like the other part of it is like if you create a fantastic product,
what are you supposed to do?
So what I'm saying is this.
I'm not saying necessarily that these people have to give their money away,
but I'm saying you make a fantastic product, maybe don't charge so much for it.
No, no, no. I know. I'm not saying give your money away. You deserve'm saying you make a fantastic product. Maybe don't charge so much for it. No, no, no.
I know.
I'm not saying give your money away.
You deserve your money.
Whatever you make, you deserve it.
Yeah.
Yeah, I'm not one of those guys that thinks that.
But at a certain point, I'm with you.
But like, you know, the guy has a $500 million boat,
and it sinks.
Like, they're on the side of the sink.
He goes like this.
Oh, my phone is on there.
Yeah.
Oh, man. You know what I's how that's how people like that
i used to have this joke i used to have this joke and i would think about this like
like elon musk or any of these guys how much let's say you found elon musk's wallet yeah
how much could you do you think you could spend on the credit card before somebody notices the shit?
Those motherfuckers are so shrewd that they would probably know immediately.
You know what I'm talking about?
I would know.
Don't you get alerts on your phone?
Yeah.
If you have Amex, I get an alert like that.
But it would be like this, though.
It would be like this.
And they're smarter than everybody.
He would be looking through the thing and be like, babe, did we buy Jamaica?
And she would be like, maybe.
But that's not how they would get caught.
They'd be caught like this.
What's this 49-50 T-Mobile?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's how you would get caught.
I'd be like, babe, do you sign up for somebody's only offense?
It's that kind of shit.
But, I mean, you imagine, like, you know, that's just a lot of money.
I don't even know what that even would be like.
I mean, how are you even a real person anymore?
But they say after a certain point, I forget what the amount is.
Your life does not change.
Your happiness does not change.
Well, no, your happiness doesn't change.
Doesn't change.
Oh, dude, I know this.
Like for Jeff Bezos, like a car, yacht.
There was a guy where I used to live.
He owned this old Jewish guy, man.
And like old school Jewish, too, with like the big beard.
He was like Moses.
If he had a staff, he'd be Moses.
He's rocking Yeezys.
He has a mattress store in a place.
And in that area, this big conglomerate
keeps trying to buy people's businesses
so they can put up apartment buildings.
And the guy won't sell.
And I asked him, I said, what's up?
He was like, I don't.
He was like, I have.
I'm chill.
Yeah, he was like, more money's not going to have i'm chill yeah he was like more money's not
gonna change my life that's where you want to be man right yeah it is but what i'm saying is i know
he's not a billionaire right he's content though he's good not stressed yeah but what how much do
you need to be happy how much does the average person need to be happy i think it's something
like 70 you can look it up it's like 75 000 i think for no no it's more now it depends where
you just saw an article it depends where you live. I just saw an article about this. It depends where you live. But what are we talking about? We're talking about happiness. 500,000.
In 2010, the study that is often cited was 75,000.
So you'd have to make that today's dollars probably like 120.
Sorry, you need 75,000 dollars to be happy?
To live comfortably.
Stop being stressed about bills, cars.
Well, it's up to 500,000 now.
500?
Yeah, I just saw a study about this.
They said maybe money can buy happiness.
Oh, wow.
It doesn't buy happiness.
It buys less stress.
That's what it does.
It just makes you comfortable. No money, more problems.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly.
I don't really agree with the shit that Mace said.
You're a blood.
I don't really agree with the stuff that Mace said.
Well, you got to listen to him.
Let's take a break, fellas.
UFC 289 is here.
We have a Calabasas Fight Companion 7 p.m. Pacific live on ThinkBoy YouTube.
Very special guest.
Come watch it with your boys.
Guaranteed it's going to be more entertaining than that fight card.
It's not a great one.
That's all right.
Watch it and make bank.
Bank with DraftKings Sportsbook app.
Use the code GOLDEN.
New customers can make a $5 UFC 289 bet and score $200 in bonus bets instantly.
That's code GOLDEN.
Only at DraftKings Sportsbook.
You can bet on the dog.
I think Irene Aldana is going to get it done against Amanda Nunes.
She's the biggest dog on the card.
You can parlay that with Benil Darius.
You think Irene will win?
Yeah, dude.
Dan Ige is going to get it done.
Amanda Nunes is the underdog now?
No, she's the favorite.
But I think she's going to lose to Irene.
Oh, okay.
There it is.
You heard it here. The Mex she's going to lose to Irene. Oh, okay. There it is. You heard it here.
The Mexicans are going to get it done.
Use DraftKings Sportsbook promo code is golden.
Gambling problem?
Call 1-800-GAMBLER.
In Massachusetts, call 800-327-5050 or visit gamblinghelplinema.org.
In New York, call 877-8-HOPE-NY or text HOPE-NY.
That's 46-7369.
In Kansas, call 1-800-522-4700 onNY or text HOPE-NY. That's 46-73-69.
In Kansas, call 1-800-522-4700 on behalf of Boot Hill Casino and Resort.
In West Virginia, gambling problem?
Call 1-800-GAMBLER or visit www.1800gambler.net.
All games regulated by the West Virginia Lottery.
Please play responsibly in partnership with Hollywood Casino at Charlestown Races.
In Connecticut, help is available for problem gambling. partnership with Hollywood Casino at Charles Town Races in Connecticut.
Help is available for problem gambling.
Call 888-789-7777 or visit ccpg.org.
Thank you.
This guy acts like because I made one thing.
You messed up three times.
Thank you.
No.
21 plus in most eligible states, but age varies by jurisdiction. See DraftKings.com slash Sportsbook for details
and state-specific responsible gaming resources.
Bonus bets expire seven days after issuance.
What is that?
Issuance?
Yeah.
Seven days after issuance.
Eligibility and deposit restrictions apply.
Team terms at Sportsbook.DraftKings.com slash MMA terms.
And this is not brought to you by Hooked on Phonics.
Watch the Fight Companions 7 p.m. live, promo code GOLDEN, DraftKings.
It's more important than ever to save money and cut back on expenses now
because of the economy, right?
The economy?
You never know what's going to happen with the economy.
Tough times out there.
For example, I used to spend over $100 a month on streaming services,
Netflix, Disney+, Prime, you name it.
But since I started using ExpressVPN,
I've been able to cut back and save so much money every month.
And I'm going to let Brendan explain.
Because you know if you use ExpressVPN,
you actually have thousands of more shows than you think.
You're not seeing them because they give you different shows
depending on your country.
So what you see on Netflix here is completely different
to what someone sees in Italy or South Korea.
Me and Chin have completely different Netflix accounts.
It's not cool, man.
But using the ExpressVPN app, I can change my online location.
ExpressVPN has over 90 countries to choose from.
So every time I run out of stuff to watch, I just switch to another country.
Boom.
Bro, and if you ever watch stuff from other countries, it's so dope.
Yeah, you do know what this is.
Subtitles, dude, it's so good.
You get to see all sorts of stuff.
But actually, I remember being in Canada, and then there was a show, and I'm watching it.
And then when I got home, I was like, where is it?
So yeah.
ExpressVPN, dude, and put the location Canada.
On top of that, you can use ExpressVPN to get discounts.
Some services cost less in other countries.
For example, if you buy Netflix from Argentina, it costs a fraction of the price.
At less than $7 a month, ExpressVPN pays for itself and so much more.
It's a no-brainer.
So if you want to get way more shows and save bank while you're at it,
go to expressvpn.com slash golden.
Don't forget to use the link so you can get three extra months free.
That's express, E-X-P-R-E-S-S, vpn.com slash golden.
Expressvpn.com slash golden to learn more.
This is what Eric's talking about.
Yeah.
I don't know, dude.
Here's the thing, too, though.
You know what you're saying about if you have a billion dollars?
But here's the thing about what you're saying.
Times have changed.
So you look at an NBA player now.
If you're a young NBA player, you have your first major contract.
Those contracts now are up to $300 million.
So by the time you are 32, 33, and if you have Nike deals and stuff like that,
in five years, billion-dollar athletes are going to be all over the place.
It's going to be common.
They're going to be all over the place.
LeBron's the only active billionaire right now.
Because what's happening is the new TV deal is going to come.
So the new average contract for a superstar is going to be in the $400, $500 million range in five years.
That's any business.
So it's like they asked Stephen A. Smith because that Pat McAfee signed a deal with ESPN.
He's making way more than Stephen A. Smith.
And they asked Stephen A. Smith because, you know, he's the face of ESPN. And they thought he'd bePN. He's making way more than Stephen A. Smith. And they asked Stephen A. Smith, because he's the face of ESPN,
and they thought he'd be mad.
He's like, nah, man.
He's like, you guys got to realize.
He's like, I'm happy.
Because you got to realize.
He's like, I signed my deal four years ago.
Pat's the market value right now.
My deal's up in a year.
So now I can reference Pat.
And thank God he did that, because now I can reference that
to get a better deal for me.
Well, he also started a podcast, too.
He was like, oh, I got to get in this other market.
Stephen A. Smith?
Yeah.
He's got a great podcast now, and it's like that's the thing.
I mean, hopefully McAfee, they let him do what he does.
Right.
Because that's the thing, though.
They will.
I don't think they will.
I think they will.
I don't know, man.
One incident.
That's all it takes.
No, I don't think they will.
Especially at ESPN.
It's definitely going to be a version.
You flipped real fast right there in this conversation.
What happened?
What happened?
You were not on my side, and then you went on my side like this.
That's how I did it.
You do that, huh?
It's called podcasting.
It was so quick, though.
I don't know if that's...
What happened?
He did what?
He goes like this.
I agree.
Hot, cold, hot, cold.
Wow.
Because I said, yeah, I don't think ESPN, he said but but but no one goes yeah but but no one pat there's no
way he would sign that deal if they're like hey you can't say this i know they tell him he can't
say a bunch of f-bombs like he does right now in his show well but outside okay all good if you
didn't pay me 17 million dollars a year and then i came in you can't talk about dicks anymore it'd
be very challenging but do you remember i would do it these guys his name is broussard last name is
chris broussard you know chris okay so chris broussard i've been on his show on his radio show
but he used to be he was huge at espn big yeah he was huge but then when one of those nba basketball
players came out as gay and he's a super christian guy he had a whole diatribe. He was on the ESPN saying like,
this is not right.
He said a whole thing that was well
Set him on fire anyway.
Da-da-da, da-da-da.
That was sponsored by Nike.
Just do it.
Top ten. Yeah, but he got
removed from ESPN. So what I'm saying
is, Pat
McAfee is not going to do that. But Pat's not doing
that shit. I know, but all it takes is something
like that. That's far from that.
Yeah, and this woke culture. Yeah, the goalposts
move though now. Nobody's more woke than ESPN.
So it's a nightmare. But
they know what they sign up for when they're getting Pat.
That's a loose cannon.
Yeah, well, I don't know if they do.
We'll see. ESPN, Disney, it's like, I feel
like the companies that have been the worst are overcorrecting the most.
Did I have to tell you that?
How has ESPN been the worst?
No, no, no.
I'm just saying.
Well, in terms of who they hire for their – that's why they had all that thing about women and black men.
It's a whole thing.
But I'm saying the Disney part of it.
I'm watching this movie with Rachel, Peter Pan, and Wendy.
I'm out.
As soon as I saw Wendy on the headline, I'm out.
Why?
Okay, that's-
What do you think?
Oh, right.
You know it's going to be woke.
It's Peter Pan.
But check it out.
But check it out.
It starts with this mid-century white family.
And you're like, oh, this is-
They get slaughtered.
You're like, oh, this is great.
No, no, no.
You're like, oh, you think, oh, okay,
wow,
they're going real with it.
They start rapping.
And then,
black Tinkerbell shows up.
And then you're like,
here we go.
And then,
you know,
ambiguous race,
Peter Pan comes.
Right.
And then they go to Neverland,
and Neverland's full of like,
there's a Down Syndrome kid.
Yeah.
And there's like,
this is where all those kids are.
It was so, to me, And there's like, this is where all those kids are. It was so,
to me,
I was just like,
oh man,
you shouldn't have done it like this.
Well,
that movie ain't shit too.
I'm just saying,
oh,
and they,
Rotten Tomatoes had to turn off comments.
Yeah,
yeah.
Well,
what's it called?
Did Well,
Ariel,
right?
Little Mermaid?
Didn't it do well or no?
Yeah.
It did well.
Yeah.
Well,
I want to say that was woke,
right?
Yeah,
but no,
no,
no,
they just remade it.
They're also fish.
The only buddy who's like, this is ridiculous. No, I agree. It's like, it's a mermaid. It did fine. Well, I'm saying that was woke, right? Yeah, but no, no, no. They just remade it. They're also fish. The only buddy who's like, this is ridiculous.
Black Mermaid.
It's like, it's a mermaid.
It did fine.
Also, they got to make like a billion dollars to break even.
So maybe it didn't do well because it made $211 million.
I don't even know.
Who knows?
No, that's the old one.
That's the old one.
But yeah.
I don't know if that's good for Disney.
Exactly.
I know.
You got to make a billion dollars is what I'm saying.
It will.
Worldwide.
Yeah, it will now.
Yeah.
I mean, I don't know. You've got to make a billion dollars is what I'm saying. It will. Worldwide. Yeah, it will now. Yeah. I mean, I don't know.
I just, 163 million.
You know, is that good?
I have no idea.
Opening weekend.
Yeah, I know.
No.
But that's their biggest weekend.
Like, where do they get that?
95 in opening weekend.
That's honestly, that might not be good.
95, Disney's like, shit.
Yeah.
I don't know.
Well, everything, you know, I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know what's good anymore. Honestly, I don't know. Well, I mean... I don't know. I don't know. I don't know what's good anymore.
Honestly, I don't know what's good anymore, man.
I was watching Silence of the Lambs the other night,
and the movie's so good.
So good.
They don't...
Like, how iconic Hannibal Lecter is.
And I was thinking, like,
dude, over the last, like, 10 years,
there's been no characters like that,
that where you're like,
that character, wow.
Because they went away from it and did real shit,
like docs, like real serial killers. It's like docs. No, that character, wow. Because they went away from it and did real shit, like docs.
But what I'm saying is –
Real serial killers.
It's like docs.
No, that's not what I'm talking – I'm not talking about –
You're saying characters.
Any character, I'm saying.
Not just serial killer.
I'm saying it doesn't happen anymore.
Now it's all Captain America or like –
Remakes.
Right.
Or this.
So it's like –
Those movies are out there. That's so crazy i know that no
they're out there but they're not iconic right you know it's like who are you going to reference as
the fucking unless it's superman you can't and that's crazy that they don't make those movies
anymore so it's either captain america or some movie with fucking francis mcdormand where she's
wandering around a fucking park for an hour and a half. And you're just like, what was that movie?
It won Best Picture?
Oh,
who did she play?
I don't know.
Oh,
and then,
and then,
so they've totally,
and now they're doing this thing
with the,
like the new,
like rules
for even winning an Oscar.
Is that real,
by the way?
That's real.
It's done.
It's done.
It's over.
People aren't watching the Oscars anyway
because it's like,
they're already alienating half the country. No, I know, I know. But all it's going to do Hollywood. It's over. People aren't watching the Oscars anyway because it's like they're already alienating half
the country.
No, I know.
I know.
But all it's going to do is whoever wins it, we know now that's not, they don't really
win shit.
Yeah, they don't win shit.
Anybody who wins from now on, those rules, you didn't win.
This is what they're going to do now.
So it's like they're going to do Batman.
The person's going to be like, the voiceover before the movie, Batman's going to be like,
I'm gay.
Yeah. And that checks the box. Yeah yeah so you can qualify for the somebody like Thank You Batman and he'll be like it's bad yeah so it checks the
box he's like he's like oh thanks I hate to do this I don't want to be that guy
yeah yeah yeah but it's bat them
yeah
no he's not gonna say guy
how do you know
I don't want to be that people
yeah
how do you even know
I'm Batman
I don't want to be there
and then he'll check the box
and then he'll just go on
with the action movie
yeah
well because you're
in a Batman suit
you're just assuming
because I look a certain way
that I'm Batman
but I feel like a doll
turns out I actually am Batman
but you shouldn't do that
in your life.
Yeah.
What?
Did you just suck my dick real quick?
Just fucking.
I like that you're doing this.
What the fuck?
A guard on the roof?
My dick's out.
It's wet.
So stupid.
Bad day.
I'm bad day.
I'm bad day.
Oh, here comes fucking.
Well, that's the name of the episode, right?
Bad day.
Yeah, dude. I don't know, man.
But getting back to what you're saying is I totally agree with you.
I think that it's like, because now, because I wish Bert and Sebastian's movie would have done better.
It's like people, it's like making like a raunchy comedy.
People are too like, ooh.
You know, it's like go see that shit.
Guys, go see like something funny.
It doesn't have to be like some big budget action movie.
Just get back to like Ace Ventura.
Superman.
Yeah, but the movies have to change.
I don't think that you can take somebody from a podcast and make them a movie star in their own movie.
I think they need to...
It's like, dude,
switching mediums is hard, okay?
Remember when David Schwimmer
tried to become a movie star?
He just took leads in movies
and then wasn't a movie star.
You need to...
If you're switching mediums,
meaning from TV to movies back then,
now it matters less,
but now it's internet to movies.
Dude, you're not going to get somebody
who clicks on something, like the laziest piece of shit that's like, oh, but now it's internet to movies. Dude, you're not going to get somebody who clicks on something,
like the laziest piece of shit
that's like,
oh, the new episode's out.
That person's going to pay $25
to wait in line and go to a movie?
They're not.
It doesn't work.
I disagree with you.
What do you mean,
case in point every day?
No, no, no.
I'm saying,
I'm going to make a different point.
But to pile on his point, but it's like even Logan Paul has done movies.
They've always shit.
I was in one of his movies.
No, no, but that's not the – okay, again, I think the point's a different point.
The people that click what you're saying, they actually pay $25, $30, $40, $50 to go watch these people do stand-up.
What I'm saying is this.
They do pay that money.
What I'm saying is this.
It's not a lot of people.
But in the podcast world,
you don't need a lot of people to be a multi-millionaire and successful.
But in the movie business,
you need a lot of people.
You'd be a massive name.
Bert's a massive name as far as
comic podcasting. Bert's not massive
like fucking Robert De Niro.
No.
Robert De Niro, that was in Sebastian's movie. massive like fucking Robert De Niro. No. Robert De Niro, that was in Sebastian movie.
Well, not Robert De Niro now.
It's a different medium, though.
He's not Chris Pratt.
No, no, I understand.
If you were like, if you put out something that was like,
and you spent, you know,
however much you spent to make it,
and then you generated five, six million dollars from it, and then you generated $5, $6 million from it
because that's your podcast audience, that's great.
Of course.
Yeah, but if you had to spend $35 million on a movie,
and you only make that.
To the movie business, they feel like that's a failure.
But I'm saying the podcast, anyway.
There's one guy in podcasts, and to your point,
there's one guy in podcasts who could actually, I think,
jump over there and get that fan base and be Rogan.
Nope.
If Rogan was Batman.
I disagree, too.
If Rogan was Batman, that thing would sell.
No, dude.
If anyone's Batman, it would sell.
But my point, no, I disagree.
If they know who it is.
Yeah.
I disagree.
I agree with you, Chris.
No, I don't think so, bro.
I don't think so, either.
Let me tell you something.
Because he's famous beyond podcasts.
Brendan, Brendan.
There's movie stars. I'm Batman. Joe Rog rugan still with this i'm batman with the
fucking microphone yeah still with the podcast mic it's like it's on the back yeah yeah
from his utility belt jamie's is robin
jamie pull that up jamie's rob Robin he's sucking too yeah yeah
my point is
there are movie stars
that bomb in the box office
but also for the same
thing
dude have you ever seen
a movie star in a podcast
they don't get numbers
yeah yeah yeah
it's a different medium
yeah you're right
it doesn't fucking work
unless you're Jason Bateman
does he do podcasts
yeah his numbers crash
oh but that
wait here's the deal so is wait, here's the deal.
So is Dak Shepard.
But here's the deal,
let me say this,
I keep forgetting
because you guys,
motherfuckers cut me off.
Dude, the fucking,
you have to start
as not a movie star
is my point.
Right, right, right.
Going back to David Schwimmer thing.
If you are a popular podcast person,
you need to start as
in a supporting role
in a movie. you can't jump you
can't just yes like tig niktaro wait yes you need to you need but no that is true though like that
kind of a role i say that because you were on your way like yes of course yes right exactly
and and i knew that by the way i know you can't just be a star in a movie not that i was getting
those offers but like you need to get some big offers but it was headed that way yeah but i wouldn't
you can't just all of a sudden be fucking john wick you gotta dip your toe in the pool exactly
even when it comes to movies yeah we get it dude i'm with you okay if you say david schwimmer one
more time i'm gonna freak the fuck out i'm just saying it's back in the day it's the most he's
ever been somebody goes from like when they go from they're acting and
then they come out with an album like they start singing mm-hmm like that's
that one does I don't think that ever works but people can go from singing to
just know just start Jared Leto Jared Leto 30 seconds to Mars you need to
start the way people start you can Leto. 30 seconds to Mars. You need to start the way people start.
You can't fucking skip.
Drake, too.
It works sometimes, but very, very rarely.
Oh, yeah.
Drake was an actor that did.
He was on Degrassi.
Yeah, which is even worse.
He grew up doing that.
But Jared Leto's the best example.
Massive, massive actor.
Massive.
One of the best, right?
And then goes from there to 30 seconds to Mars.
They play arenas.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
All right.
You love them. They're on tour soon, though, right? Yeah, yeah. We're going, right? Who's going? You to Mars. They play arenas. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right. You love them.
They're on tour soon, right?
Yeah, yeah.
We're going, right?
Who's going?
You and me.
You and your family.
No, I can't bring my family around him.
He'll fuck my girl.
Dude, you and me.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
If I can watch.
You're a girl.
We'll fuck him.
Yeah, yeah.
And I'll watch.
You're a monster.
I got to not ever go to 30 seconds to Mars.
Yeah. I've never even heard of them before. Really? Yeah. Oh, they slap, bro. I're a monster. I got to not ever go to 30 Seconds to Mars. Yeah.
I've never even heard of them before.
Really?
Yeah.
Oh, they slap, bro.
I don't care.
I don't care.
Why?
That's something in my life I won't ever deal with.
Isn't that great?
I just won't.
I won't be there.
I won't hear the music.
I'll probably kidnap you.
Like Saving Silverman.
It's just something I don't have to deal with.
Yes.
Awesome, dude.
I don't have to deal with it.
If we're backstage, you're like, what's up, brothers?
Hey, hey, Jared Leto.
You know what's crazy about you saying that?
It's like they are this big and they're selling on arenas.
And it's like I've never heard of them.
You wouldn't go see it.
But that's what I'm saying, that the levels of like.
So it's like.
I know, I know.
For some reason, like comedy, even though it's huge in our minds, it's still less than.
I know, yeah, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Music for someone that you've never even heard of.
Yeah.
No, I mean, dude, I'm sure they're great.
I have no fucking idea if they're great or not.
He can sing.
Shut up.
He plays guitar, right?
Or something like that?
He's the lead singer.
That boy can sing.
Really?
He's the lead singer?
All right.
I wish it was Patreon because we could bond over it, dude.
Right?
Well, let's mark it for next week.
Two weeks, actually. Listen, if's put market for next week.
Listen,
if you're over 21,
all right, if you're over 21,
you dip,
chew,
use pouches.
Like I do with long cut,
whatever the pouch is.
We got it all.
Check out the award winning tobacco alternative,
black Buffalo,
black Buffalo is everything you love.
Nothing.
You don't the taste,
the feel,
the ritual,
just without the actual tobacco leaf or stem.
Black Buffalo is only made from a variety of green leaves in the cabbage family.
You take pride in what you do, take pride in what you dip.
Honor your rituals with Black Buffalo.
Look at me.
Black Buffalo makes all the best flavors like wintergreen, mint, straight peach,
even blood orange, my personal favorite, all right,
with and without pharmaceutical-grade nicotine.
You can buy Black Buffalo online at blackbuffalo.com.
We're at thousands of retail locations across the country.
I get mine at Chevron, Extra Mountain, Calabasas,
right up the street from here.
If I ever run out, I just stop by.
Boom, get me a little something-something.
All right?
So if you're 21 or over and use products like this,
it's time to join the Black Buffalo herd.
Head to blackbuffalo.com.
Use promo code GOLDEN at checkout for 15% off your first order.
Use my code.
My code, GOLDEN.
It's my code.
It's my code.
It's GOLDEN for 50% off your first order.
One last time.
Promo code GOLDEN for 15% off your order.
Warning.
This product contains nicotine.
Nicotine is an addictive chemical.
Black Buffalo products are intended for adults age 21 and older who are consumers of nicotine or tobacco.
Tell you what, man.
I was at the store with my girl, and she wanted to look at some jewelry.
We couldn't find anything.
Nothing original, dude.
It was so expensive.
You can buy it online, right?
You can actually get diamonds online.
Like good ones?
Good ones, actually.
Have you heard of Blue Nile?
Look, you can find just about anything online and buy it more easily and conveniently than ever, and that doesn't stop for diamonds.
You might think that's not the case when it comes to something personal like that,
like your engagement ring, but it is.
Blue Niles build your own ring option,
and overnight shipping options will have you wondering why you ever thought that.
BlueNile.com is the original online jeweler.
BlueNile.com is the original online jeweler.
Jeweler?
BlueNile.com is the original online jeweler. Is he a jeweler? BlueNile.com is the original online jeweler.
Since 1999, they've helped millions of couples
create their perfect engagement ring.
And with Blue Nile, you can create a bigger,
more brilliant piece than you can even imagine
at a price you won't find at a traditional jeweler.
Blue Nile also offers diamond price guarantee,
which means that in most cases,
they can meet or beat a competitor's price
on comparable diamonds.
When you commit to a piece, so does Blue Nile.
You get a guaranteed service and repair for life.
In most cases, Blue Nile can deliver overnight.
The secret's safe, too.
The ring and all that, every time you order from Blue Nile, it's insured,
and it arrives in packaging that won't give away what's in sign.
So if your purchase isn't perfect, there's no problem.
Blue Nile offers a 100% satisfaction guarantee with guaranteed free shipping and returns.
Right now, you can get $50 off your purchase of $500 or more with code GOLDEN at BlueNile.com.
That's $50 off with code GOLDEN at BlueNile.com.
BlueNile.com.
Should we do one video?
It's been great.
No, it's been great. I know
You have a little bit of attitude today what?
Brendan you guys say shit about me sometimes and it's just not true man. See here. It is right there
You're that's it right there. You got a little serious about David Schwimmer
Yeah, thank you. You got a tone. I don't like that. You don't have a tone
My shit is know me, you know my tone so, you know behind the tone. So just chill, right?
See, and there it is.
But you know me, so it's all good.
No, don't try to clean it up.
You said we did that?
Yeah.
We got your wife right there.
He did that.
He did that.
He went, and then I'm trying to do that.
I don't do it, dude.
No, no, no.
You really cleaned that up.
I'm glad you did that.
That means you care.
I care about you.
Yeah.
So I know because you cleaned it up. You know you're being a dick. I'm not being a dick. You kind of snapped. I care about you. Yeah. So I know because you cleaned it up.
You know you're being a dick.
I'm not being a dick.
You kind of snapped when I couldn't find Matt Rife's body.
Boom.
That's right.
Boom.
It's a joke.
He knows it's a joke.
Yeah, but.
No.
I fire at him every day.
Wait.
It was a joke then.
And we thought, oh, funny.
But then it kind of kept going.
Yeah.
And we look back and we're like, ooh.
There's some real hate.
There's some real hate.
Don't get me.
Yay.
You know, it's been since you hit your hand.
Oh, that hurts so bad, dude.
You can't take pain.
So that's what it is.
What's this guy want, Nick?
What's up, guys?
Big fan.
Love everything you guys do.
Nice.
Kind of have a confession today.
Not something I've ever told anyone before.
I wanted to get it off my chest.
Here goes.
Chris D'Elia is going to be in Tucson, Arizona on June 17th.
He's going to be in Pueblo, Colorado on June 23rd.
He's going to be in Colorado Springs
on June 24th.
What is this?
Isn't that crazy?
There it is.
That's funny, dude.
Did you pay him?
No, you know, it's an interesting submission.
That is true.
And I would say, honestly, I will be at those places.
That is probably...
Oh, fuck you, man.
That's probably...
Oh, my God.
That's probably the truest...
Your little disciples are calling in now.
That's probably the truest video submission we've ever gotten, honestly.
The way he looks at that, he's going to say he murdered somebody.
Thank God that guy called in.
Chris is back.
What do you think about that, though?
Let's really talk about this.
What else you got, Nick?
It's funny, it was on his mind, man.
Oh, wow.
Coming in hot.
This guy's cool, huh?
If there's another one, I'm out.
Gentlemen, I hope you're doing well. It's Kyrik from Rhode Island. oh wow coming in hot this guy's cool if there's another one I'm out gentlemen
I hope you're doing well
it's Kyric from Rhode Island
I haven't sent in in a while
but I just saw
what might be the funniest video
I've ever seen
in my entire life
and I would love
to get your reaction on it
it is
David Guetta
Ending Racism
I don't know if you guys
have seen it
I covered it on my podcast
but we gotta watch it
because I would love
to get a first reaction
Ending Racism
it's
it's good-hearted,
but just the deliveries,
you just got to watch.
He's French,
is the bottom line.
And I think this is
a good opportunity
for maybe a new segment
like cringe video reactions.
I like watching you guys
react to stuff.
That's a good idea.
Nick can name it.
It's great.
We'll figure it out.
But yeah, Chris,
let me know how this rates
on the Sephora scale
because I think that does
play into us.
It's very foreign.
I have talked about this on Congratulations,
but you guys got to see this.
15 million views?
It's hilarious.
This record is in honor of George Floyd.
And I really hope we can see more unity and more peace
when already things are so difficult so shout out to his family
shout out to his family i'm gonna stop racism so oh and then the mark
they changed that okay they changed the drop they changed the drop oh my god that's so much
thing ever.
I have a dream.
Also, I like how it goes through his website and not straight
to George Floyd's GoFundMe.
Make sure you get your merch.
Here's the real one.
He does
something else, right?
Yeah, this is the real one.
This is the one I saw.
Let's not use the N-word anymore, am I right?
Tell me he starts crying.
He's all.
That's the best part. Shout out to his family. He's off. That's so funny, Rob.
That's the best part.
Shout out to his family.
He's off.
Shout out to George Floyd.
He's off.
First of all, this guy's great.
First of all, that speech is already like a fantastic speech.
With the beat.
If he would have done that.
Yeah.
Oh, my God, dude.
If he did it back then,
he'd be like,
what is this music?
Yeah.
The whole time.
Gotta get the...
He's off.
He's off.
Okay.
Okay.
What's the guy now?
Yeah.
Yeah, Martin Luther King was.
This guy slaps.
He was a master of, like, comparing things in your mind to make, like, when good things, good things, you know, he'd be like, like a flowing river of.
And then you'd be like, ooh, you relate it.
And then something bad.
And it'd be like, you know, a burning volcano.
Right, right, right, right.
He was a master.
I'd slap like this, and I heard my thing.
That's a burning volcano.
Yeah. Yeah. That was a burning volcano. I'd be, right. He was the master. When I clap like this and I heard my thing, that's a burning volcano. Yeah.
That was a burning volcano.
I'd be like,
you're right, Tear.
You're right.
Denzel Tear.
Yeah, that video.
Listen, man, the guy's...
Look at that.
He's wearing a Malcolm X merch.
He's so foreign, though.
That's not Malcolm X.
That's Martin Luther King Jr.
Please take a picture.
That's so funny.
Look at there.
Right there.
Denzel Washington.
Yeah, you got to cut to.
Oh, yeah.
It's Dwayne Wade.
Webster.
From what was that?
The Jaguars covered it.
He says that, and that's when you hit the drum.
We're only talking about him.
We're not talking about fucking Malcolm X.
We're talking about Martin Luther King Jr.
Yeah, I'm a Malcolm X fan.
I prefer Malcolm X.
You're like David Guetta of this show.
You prefer Malcolm X?
Yeah, I like Malcolm X.
The thing is, he's just foreign.
He gets a pass, right?
Ah, no.
Shout out to his family. It's the only thing he knows how to say. He gets a pass, right? Ah, no. Shout out to his family is the only thing he knows how to say.
He doesn't know how to say the other shit.
But he's doing what he does.
Yeah.
If we were doing it on stage, we'd be doing it in a joke form.
If you're a singer, you're singing like, you know, freedom.
It's just a little cringy.
Yeah, when you're a DJ, that's how you fucking, you know.
Shout out to his family.
Hey, everyone.
End world hunger.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, that's how he does it.
Because they did the AIDS.
Hey, why are you not eating that much?
You do what you do.
Because Queen did that AIDS band thing.
If Nick was doing it, it'd be like silence, and he'd be like, fuck.
Hold on, hold on.
He's like, ah, fuck.
They're on mute.
I gotta go move the camera.
Check your AirPods.
And it just says on the screen.
Check your AirPods.
It says on the screen, support Joey's flow.
That's how Nick would do it.
I sent in a video.
Okay.
This is you.
What's up, guys?
This is Jack.
I have a Am I Wrong For That For You.
I don't know if you guys have heard, but supposedly the government is in possession of some sort
of intact UFO.
They're also in possession of my uncle, but that never made the news.
Anyways, personally, I don't really care about the intact UFO.
Am I wrong for that?
And also, Chris, I just wanted to let you know that me and my girlfriend went to a show of yours in Seattle a couple months ago,
and it was by far, hands down, one of the best shows I've ever been to, if not the best.
Wow.
Just wanted to thank you for a wonderful evening from my girlfriend and I.
Have you seen Blue Man Group?
Gang, gang, buzz, buzz, a woo-woo.
Have you seen David Jetta?
Have you seen david have you seen blue man group um
what if he was like yes hands down best show i've ever seen except for once i saw blue man
group and the way they fucking fire marshmallows into their mouth was uh probably the best thing
i've ever seen i would be like oh his opinion doesn't matter um thank you dude appreciate that
um yeah i'm with this dude like what am i gonna do you know if we I appreciate that. Yeah, I'm with this dude. Like, what am I going to do?
You know?
If we find out that they have aliens.
But that's what I'm saying.
What am I going to do?
What can I do either way?
Nothing, dude.
What can you do?
Yeah, when you look at it that way.
When you look at it that way.
I understand.
Because here's the thing.
I'm the kind of guy that, like, the government is like, some people are like, we need to
know everything about what the government is.
They're hiding things.
Hey, hide stuff from me. Hide stuff from me. Oh. Like the government is like Some people are like We need to know everything About what the government They're hiding things Hey
Hide stuff from me
Yeah
Hide stuff from me
Oh
I don't know
Oh you're a cuck
That's fine
No I'm not a cuck
No we need people like you
No I'm not a cuck
Hey put your mask on
No I don't
No no no
Put your mask on for you
But the thing is
Put the mask on
I just
I don't
I don't need to know everything
You don't
Put your mask on
Okay so
Alright so Mr. Fuckin
I need to know everything Say You don't. Put your mask on. Okay, so, all right. So, Mr. Fucking I Need to Know Everything.
Say you know everything the government is hiding.
Which would be crazy.
Hey, hey, hey.
Now what?
What are you going to do?
Huh?
What are you, you big stupid oaf, going to do?
Why not wear a mask and get vaccinated?
Well, I...
You know, it's a whole sham.
You know what I'm saying?
I'm talking about
this. That same shit.
Ten years ago, this is bigger news. It all falls under the same
thing. What'd you say?
Ten years ago, this is bigger news.
What do you mean by that? This? I don't
understand. We're like inflation.
This is real.
This is the most
fascinating, spectacular thing in human history, right?
But no one believes it.
I think they probably are hiding alien technology.
It's probably this.
Right.
Yeah.
But I don't...
If they're not hiding alien technology, I would put all my money on that they're hiding alien technology.
100%.
Like, why...
Dude, the universe is so big.
There's definitely people out there.
Aliens.
And, like, it's not just us.
We've been around for how long?
You know there's shit out there.
Alice Jones, bro.
Like, I think maybe it's an alien satellite or something they sent.
Just like how we send shit out to find out, communicate.
This is their thing.
And they're like, hey.
There's people on a podcast right now that are going,
Yeah, dude.
I would listen to that.
And they're on their thing.
And one guy's like,
Yeah, that's me.
That's me.
But what's weird is it could be two people like, yeah,
no shit.
Like all this time.
Like,
you know,
shit.
There's people.
It's like when they released new JFK assassination,
like clearly.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Be like,
yeah,
we know.
Yeah.
Yeah.
We know.
Well,
yeah,
they're out there.
But that's the thing.
Like,
to me,
this is a little different.
I mean,
because like our perception is different,
but yeah,
our perception of like aliens is always like some negative thing.
I mean,
it's like,
see,
I blame Hollywood for that.
That's what I mean.
Hollywood, because when they came out with Mars Attacks,
they're trying to attack us and all this shit.
It was before that, bro.
No, no, no.
Mars Attacks changed the culture in aliens.
It did.
It did.
Bro, what are you...
I think he's thinking War of the Worlds.
Yeah.
Yes, War of the Worlds.
Yes, War of the Worlds.
Mars Attacks...
It's not unusual with the fucking...
No, that's a remake.
Mars Attack was way before that.
We're so way off this fucking.
No, this started with Orson Welles on a radio program.
And he did a radio program where he was like, and we're being attacked.
And people thought it was really fucking shocking.
How do we know they're not chill?
How do they come down and like, yeah, we're good.
You can do your thing.
We're good.
They're not going to attack us.
Like, you guys ain't shit.
We're like ants and they have magnifying glasses.
Yeah, but here's the thing.
We come up with these stories because of how terrible we are.
Let's not forget about when we find new places, how we ruin them.
Yeah, yeah.
We take over.
We take over.
So what I'm just saying is, like, so in our thought process,
if we're like, well, if it was us, we would find an alien race find an alien race and we would like take their resources and we're thinking that they're going
to do that to us and they might be chill they might be better people what they might you know
what they are probably more evolved they would have to be more evolved if they can travel right
here because just what science technology space travel but here's my thing, though. If an alien race has the technology
to come here and they're just watching
us, they're sadistic.
Because if you can help
and you're not doing it... They're jerking off.
Yeah.
Eat Aunt Morbin. Morbin and
Morgan. Morbin and Morgan.
And they're listening to that podcast.
Look at these people. Look at these.
They're killing each other.
But I think Hollywood's to blame for it.
Like Hollywood with sharks.
So stupid.
Like Hollywood with sharks.
Hollywood in prison.
Think about all the prison movies in Hollywood.
Everyone's getting raped.
How about this one?
Hollywood makes you think.
That's a gay fantasy.
How about Hollywood makes you think that doctors care about you?
Me blorgan.
Uh-oh.
Me blorgan. Me blorgan. Me bloh. Me blorgan, me blorgan.
Me blorgan. Me blorgan.
Me blorgan.
Why would you assume that
their dick is right there?
Me blorgan. No, they're probably like this.
Yeah.
So stupid.
We both went here to see that.
That'd be great of you. You're talking about giving somebody head.
Yeah, dude.
You would be seeing their chin.
Well, what's a better spot
for your dick?
I got it.
Go.
Under the armpits this way.
If you get boners,
everyone knows it.
This how you jerk off?
Bro, that would be the shit.
Well, remember the scary movie
with Marlon Wayans?
It was their finger
Meeblorgan
Meeblorgan
to do it like that
Meeblorgan
Meeblorgan
what about people that lose their arm
what if you lost your arm
yep
you know
and your dick's over here
I guess you would have to go like that
yeah
or just like this
oh right
then you'd see people doing this all the time.
Yeah, jogging.
I'd be running.
You'd be like,
so fit, bro.
You'd be so fit.
I don't like underarm.
We should do a pole.
Chest, bro.
That's annoying.
All right, well, where?
In a briefcase. On the wall. Oh, that's annoying. You're just... You're just... You're girthy. You look stupid in those. All right, well, where? You know?
I don't know.
In a briefcase.
Yeah.
On the wall, just...
Maybe your knee.
What if it was your knee?
I think it's probably in the best place, bro, to be honest.
So stupid.
We're not going to...
You'd pick that.
We're not going to redesign.
If you were Jesus Christ or whoever, in the beginning, you'd be like, that's where it
goes.
In there.
Where all that hair is.
They probably tried all these other ones.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
They were like, nah.
Doesn't work.
No, you know what?
Because when it's limp, you can't see.
That's what the fucking.
Well, the big dick guy.
Other people are just, you know, it's just.
No, you know what?
You can slick your pack.
You can comb over.
Put a man button.
You take a picture with the film
and the wind blows it off.
So stupid.
Wow.
But the thing is, do you have balls?
So you have the dick and it's just like two balls.
Meat goggles.
Then I would be able to go like, you know.
What's that, Nick?
So stupid.
This is from a teacher.
She wanted to remain anonymous, so she just sent in audio.
Hey, guys.
I wanted to know your thoughts about where to send your kids to school.
Would you do public school or would you do private school?
Private school could be religious or academic or some other specialty,
outdoor-based, things like that.
And I know you guys are in L.A.
I'm up in the Bay Area.
So maybe it's a different vibe depending on where you are.
But I was just curious, like,
do you have a philosophy about public versus private
or what you would want to do and why?
Thanks.
There's a lot to it.
Because your kids aren't old enough for school yet, right?
Tigers are a private school.
There's pros and cons.
Cons are all the kids are assholes.
I feel like you want to do public schools if they're good.
If it's a good district, yeah, you want public schools.
We get to be an involved parent.
That's what that's about.
Well, yeah.
100%.
I have a friend of mine that works for LAUSD, We get to be an involved parent. That's what that's about. Wow. Yeah. 100%. Yeah.
I have a friend of mine that works for LAUSD, and she works in the special needs department.
Ooh-wee.
And what she's saying to me is that you'd be surprised.
There's so many resources that families could take advantage of, and they just don't.
They might not know about it, though, either.
But that's what I'm saying.
Parents aren't involved. They're just like, you know, you think, oh, I got to work, whatever. I send my kid to school and not worry about't. They might not know about it, though, either. But that's what I'm saying. Your parents aren't involved. They're just like, you know, you think,
oh, I got to work, whatever.
I'll send my kid to school and not worry about it.
Yeah.
You want to be an involved parent.
You guys are involved parents.
Yeah, sometimes I regret sending my kid private.
Really?
Some of the, like, summer breaks coming up,
and T's like, oh, my buddy's going to Fiji.
What are we doing?
I'm like, you mean?
Oh, God, that's hilarious.
What do you mean, what are we doing?
You mean the backyard?
Yeah, yeah.
We're not doing anything.
We might drive to...
Hey, play with bubbles. We might drive to Ojai. Blow're meeting in the backyard. Yeah. Yeah. We're not doing anything. We might drive to- Hey, play with bubbles.
We might drive to Ojai.
Blow this.
Blow the bubbles.
Yeah.
Or spring break.
Like, dad, my friend's going to Paris.
For reals.
I'm like, cool.
You ain't going?
Dude, to be seven and want to go to Paris is crazy, though.
Yeah.
Nuts.
Unbelievable.
I found out what Paris was three years ago.
I've never been.
Nor do I want to.
You are so dumb. I was was 40 I'm sorry there's what
where speaking of oh you know what it's crazy I know this is like not off subject but on subject
sort of there's this kid on Instagram he's called the music kid he's six years old and this kid is
he could play every instrument and he'll'll just be in front of the thing,
and he's making music.
You know what I mean?
Did I move the thing?
Like good music.
No, the kid is brilliant.
They just took him to a studio,
and he was put together.
He could sing.
Is he Asian?
No, he's a little white kid,
and he's six years old.
Is he Asian?
Yeah, totally. Miles the music kid. Is he Asian? Yeah, totally.
Miles the music kid.
Is it Miles?
It's Miles?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Wow.
Yeah.
But I'm just saying, I just think about, like, you know, your kid wants to go to Paris.
No, my kid doesn't want to go.
His friends went.
I know, but I'm saying-
He's like, what are we doing?
It's like, you know, if you're sick, your kids are sick, you can just go be like, well,
there's other six-year-olds actually doing shit.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
You know what I mean?
Yeah. This kid's making music. The kid yeah, yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah.
This kid's making music.
The kid is, I mean, it's really fantastic.
Like, hopefully he sticks with it, because what if he's not?
Nah, he's going to fizzle out.
I know, he just doesn't want to do that.
You don't want to peak at six.
I peaked at six, imagine.
Yeah, this is him.
The guy who was crushing high school had a mustache.
Trumpet.
Copy automation data.
Now look what it does.
Razor effect.
Do this.
Now it's got a half.
He's like, donate to George Floyd.
He's like, we got to stop racism.
You want to talk about, like, this is a true essence of what a savant is.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
A hundred percent.
You know?
My kid can't even tie his fucking shoes.
Well, like father, like son.
I love it with the ducktail shirt.
I know.
I want to keep hearing it.
You don't drive it all the way up.
You drag it to like 253.
Of course you do.
That's how we get the Cajun on sound.
Damn.
We don't want these notes so sick.
And see how I'm selecting all of them?
That keeps a human feel.
I'm going to go buy my son a fucking keyboard.
Bro, this kid just said, that keeps a human feel. You buy my son a fucking keyboard, bro. This kid just said,
that keeps a human feel.
You were hilarious.
You two are going to go home right now
and look at your kids like,
what the fuck are you guys doing?
No, but the kid's amazing.
And he's like,
all the big producers and stuff
know about him.
They got Questlove right there.
Yeah, he was at the Questlove.
The one that has six years old right there
and the thing,
that's him at the next one. Which one? Left, all the way left. The one that has six years old right there and the thing, that's him at the next one.
Which one?
Left.
All the way left.
That one right there.
This is him
at the studio.
He's getting a tour
of this iconic
recording studio
and then this happened.
No, he don't have
his own song.
Bro, he's six,
this guy.
When's his album
come out?
I want to buy tickets
to his tour.
Did he have an OnlyFans?
Yeah, that sounds great.
So he just impromptu recorded a song.
But your kids aren't in school yet, but you'll notice with the kids,
certain kids are really good at this.
There's this little girl, my son's math class, beast.
Other kids are just fine at it.
Then when you start playing sports, you're like, that kid's never going to get it.
Even at 6'7".
That kid should just go get a job now.
Your kid is 6'7"?
6'7", yeah.
Dad.
Did you want to watch the rest of this?
Get me MacBook Pro.
I was just thinking about when you're talking about this subject about what are you supposed to do?
You kind of hijacked the conversation.
You can also tell
i'll take it i'm with you but you can also tell the the kids who parents are involved yeah yeah
big time but to answer this time so let's come up for a play date i'm like what the fuck are you
doing but to answer anonymous lady is like i you know i think she had strong opinions about wherever
she works i think is what that she's in san francisco though yeah that's world war z up there
yeah but there's a lot of, like,
great school districts.
I don't know.
I just feel like be involved.
But even in a public school,
you got to be involved.
I'm at private school.
100%.
Just because you're like, you know.
Oh, no.
You know, I guess you just want to be involved
if you can.
Not everybody can, though.
That's the hard part.
Yeah, right.
Not everybody has, like, you know.
Yeah.
Yeah, there's single mothers out there
that just fucking.
Yeah, what are you supposed to do?
I grew up like that.
Yeah, you turned out all right.
Because you seem like...
You guys, like...
I know Chris is going to be the guy that's going to be, like, fucking, you know, dropping
the...
You're going to be in a line waiting for Calvin.
Yeah, every day.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
You know what I mean?
And that's what you want to do.
But not everybody has the privilege to do that.
That luxury.
That luxury.
My parents didn't.
Fuck no.
I rode a school bus.
I walked home.
I drove the school bus.
I can't believe I didn't get molested.
Two mile walk.
You probably did.
From first grade to fucking eighth grade.
You did, bro.
You know, that's why I see T.
You're blacking it out.
Yeah, you're probably right.
You're blocking it out.
Yeah, you're right.
Think about it hard.
You got molested, didn't you?
Take some time.
It's not your fault.
Yeah, there you go.
You got me in a van with candy.
Yeah, maybe.
I can't believe I didn't get molested. That's why you don't eat candy now. Not your fault. There you go. You got me in a van with candy? Yeah, maybe. I can't believe I'm eating it.
That's why you don't eat candy now, not your teeth.
I was cute.
I bet you were, man.
No one touched my wiener.
Let me tell you something right now.
You're a fucking handsome guy.
Oh, thanks.
Yeah, you're all right.
He's a good-looking guy.
Yeah.
Stupid, but you know what I mean?
You know, you're smart in a lot of ways, right?
And you're handsome.
Yeah, thanks, man.
All right.
See? Full circle. Full circle. Yeah, thanks, man. See?
Full circle.
Full circle.
Eric's hating over there.
He's ugly.
Eric's a hater.
I'm not ugly.
You're not ugly.
You?
Yeah.
I would never say that.
I never said that.
You said it, though.
No, you said it.
I said you're a hater.
I didn't say you're ugly.
What are you even talking about?
That's what I was getting at.
What the fuck, bro?
That's it.
And we're back.
There he is.
Quickly, we got him. Yeah. Oh, my God. That's a note. getting. What the fuck, bro? That's it. And we're back. There he is. Look how quickly we got him.
Yeah.
Oh, my God.
That's a note.
I'm all right.
I'm all right for a 10.
Is this ChrisDelia.com notes?
Wow.
I didn't know what that was.
This guy's awesome.
It's in the Sebring.
I'm Ryan Moshe.
22 years old.
And I live in Port Clinton, Ohio, where we do have a big boy.
Oh, shit.
But that's the point.
The television shows Survivor survivors coming to my hometown.
Well, the island's off the coast of my hometown,
and I'm going to be going to the casting call.
Do you have any recommendations, advice,
or what would you do if you were walking into this position?
Help me get ahead of the competition now,
and tell me what to do, boys.
Let's fucking go.
Gang, gang, buzz, buzz, soar.
Woo, woo, woo, woo, woo.
He's going to make it up.
This guy doesn't need any help.
Just send this video.
Keep doing what you're doing.
I'd almost say just like maybe 10% tone it down.
Just to get on the show.
Then when you're on the show, ramp it back up.
Then you can do that.
Ramp it up.
But they're going to think you're doing a joke.
10% is so nominal.
Like 10%, he's still going to be too much.
Yeah, but I think that they want that, but not maybe.
Here's the thing.
They don't want to think he's going to take it as a joke.
Boom.
You lower it 10%, 20%.
They go, all right.
To us, sending the video to us, yes, keep that energy.
Yes.
But yes, you have to have some like.
No, you have to have some genuine.
You have to feel like you genuinely want to be on there with that passion you know but how survivor you had cancer
and you're in remission it might come back yeah say your mom died of diabetes whatever but uh
nick how's survivor work do you know you look like you watch survivor uh i did watch the first
season my grandma what about it how's it work it's 10 people is it like naked afraid uh yeah
yeah there's there's
challenges and you can like you win an immunity title and you can win food or like luxuries while
you're on it and they eventually vote people off until there's one and you're just stuck in an
island do you sleep in beds and shit or is it like naked afraid yeah it's usually like in a
on a campsite but you can win like a hotel for a night so you get off the island and then the
last two people the people who all get kicked off vote for the winner so you got to be nice to people likable can't fuck
everybody over i never watched survivor because i'm a big brother person but it's all very similar
yeah yeah i don't want to either i don't care about any of that shit you don't care about
aliens you don't have any guilt you don't have no guilty pleasures i mean bad movies bad movies
stupid movies really stupid you waste your life watching stupid movies.
You're being really harsh, man.
Yeah, I am.
I'm being mean.
God damn, man.
You called Eric ugly, though.
I did.
Yeah, you did.
There was a tone.
You called him a big stupid oaf.
No, you didn't.
They said I was smart and handsome.
After that, way after,
I still think you're a stupid oaf
in some ways.
In some ways.
And this is the last guy like 10 years later.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
After Survivor.
This is Chris DiStefano if you had a gambling problem.
Hey, King and Sting.
This is Richard from Oklahoma City.
Oh, wow.
Quick question.
I love it.
Celebrity death match.
I thought it was Irish.
Who would be your opponent?
You can pick a celebrity, but even better,
you can do a teen celebrity death match.
You have a team member.
Who would be your team member and which two celebrities would get it?
My team member personally would be Eric Griffin because I believe he has a hidden artwork strength
and I used to let it loose in the arena.
I would probably fight some Zoomers, YouTube people,
or TikTokers or something like that.
What are the words he said?
He said celebrity death match. Zoomers? I think it'd be just who would we fight right let's keep it
with that the whole he got he's like 18 man tournament give me your top 18 like no no just
who would you the way you develop talent is we'll start a feeder program right females only dude we got to give back to them um i'd fight the
rock we do numbies numbies i'd be the shit out of the rock you think so you would beat the shit
out of the rock are you serious eric oh you oh you watched oh this guy believes zoro where the
fuck he's and you think you'd beat me up first of all do you think that the rock was in zoro i don't
know i don't want you guys are both big dummies right now.
You think he would be in Zorro?
He's more of a dummy though, right?
I would love if he was in Zorro.
I don't think so.
He's so stupid.
He's so doofus in the fucking...
Dude, you would beat the shit out of The Rock.
Like no one would know whoever his other character is.
Yeah, yeah, exactly.
That he's not Zorro.
He's walking around like...
Zorro is like with a bald head.
Huge.
Just fucking huge.
And he's like...
Who is this guy? He's like, this is Zorro. And then he just comes later. You're like, wait, where's your Zorro is like with a bald head Just fucking this And he's like Who is this guy?
This is Zorro
And then he just comes later
And you're like
Wait where's your Zorro shit?
Can you smell what Zorro's cooking?
You're like
Is this The Rock?
The point is you gotta do Numbies
And I would do Numbies
I don't wanna do Numbies
I just wanna fight
Do I wanna fucking fight?
Who?
I feel like you got a long list
How tall is The Rock?
6'2 He? 6'2
He's 6'2
I'm in the elevator room
Is he a big dude?
Compared to you
How big is he?
You guys were like
It was just
No it was just two of us
Did you say anything?
Just what's up?
Sup The Rock
He said what?
He said he's a fan
I said I want to fucking fight you
He's not
All of that sounds made up
What about John Cena?
Can you beat up John Cena?
Absolutely, man.
I like this.
This should be a thing.
Of course he can beat up fucking John Cena.
Who can Brendan beat up?
Absolutely, man.
Absolutely, man.
Yeah.
So you can beat up John Cena.
Okay.
Bro, I think I could fucking probably take John Cena, dude.
I'm going to fuck him up next time.
All right.
How about this?
It's funner if it's you guys, not me.
Can you beat up John Wick?
The character? Absolutely not. Absolutely not. not me. Can you beat up John Wick? The character?
Absolutely not.
Absolutely not.
You don't think you can take John Wick?
Does he have guns?
No, it's just like you just caught him.
Oh, no, guns, absolutely.
I'd beat the fuck out of Denzel Washington.
All right, well, he's 60.
I'm just saying.
I know.
Spitballing ideas here.
No, but can you beat up Equalizer?
That's what I'm talking about.
No guns?
You think you can beat up Equalizer?
He looks at his watch.
No, he's going to go like this.
Brendan.
And then you just.
Yeah.
It's more fun to think about who you guys can beat.
You guys can't fight, right?
Well, that's not true.
I can tussle.
I feel like Eric's this guy.
Yeah.
Like Lisa Simpson.
A couple of boxing classes.
Eric's the guy who you go to punch, and it goes right through his hand,
and he goes, blah, and he makes that noise.
Wow.
And he goes, my glasses.
You know what I mean?
And he steps on them, and then he shits, and a dog comes,
and pisses on him.
I'm the guy that goes, what are we doing?
Yeah, well, that's true, right?
What are we doing?
But who would you fight, Eric, honestly? Fight? Celebrity death match. I'm the guy that goes, what are we doing? Yeah, well, that's true, right? What are we doing? But who would you fight, Eric?
Honestly.
Fight?
Celebrity death match.
I don't even know.
I don't really...
You have any anger towards anybody?
I'd go for somebody really fucking big.
Sean Hannity.
Fuck Sean Hannity.
Wow, that's fucking hilarious.
That's hilarious.
Dude, I would pay so much money
to watch you fight Sean Hannity in fucking Palm Beach, Florida.
In Palm Beach.
Come get some.
Come get some, Hannity.
All you hear is, jam on it.
And Eric beats the fuck out of Sean Hannity.
Sean Hannity.
That's a good one.
I don't know.
I want some.
Tucker Carlson.
I'm giving you a realistic, you know what I'm saying?
Like, I'm not going to.
He does.
He does.
He'll tell you, too.
He does.
Carl McGraw.
He's done Jitsu for like five years.
I know.
This is probably rich.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Oh, wow.
He always makes sure you know, too.
That's funny.
Because they were talking about crime importantly.
He's like, man, if I was out there, you know, just like, you know, I took Carl McGraw for
seven years.
What about Mark Wahlberg?
Can you beat up Mark Wahlberg?
Because he's a tough guy.
You're talking to Chris, right?
I don't know about Mark Wahlberg. the guy who sucker punched a poor Asian guy
and he lost his eye when he was a teenager?
Bro, everyone makes mistakes.
I think, honestly, if I would fight.
Why do you keep bringing that up?
I would fight Mark Wahlberg just for the fuck of it.
I'd do numbies.
Because of him, bro.
It's Mark Wahlberg.
Well, that's why you want to do it.
Don't tune in to watch me fight.
We need to fight The Rock.
No.
Because people would bet.
They would want you.
You'd be the underdog, even though you would.
I would not be the underdog.
I would be so hated.
That's what I mean.
Yeah.
I'd be the favorite, though.
Who would people want to see?
Who do you think these haters would want to fight you?
They'd be like Jon Jones.
Who's the number one person on the list to beat up Brendan Schaub?
Who would you want to see?
It'd have to be like Jon Jones or something like that.
It would have to be?
It would have to be.
He's fighting currently, right?
Yeah, yeah.
He's the best of all time.
Oh, really?
He has more haters than I do, for sure. More haters? Oh, yeah. Why? He's the best of all time. Oh, really? He has more haters than I do, for sure.
More haters?
Oh, yeah.
Why?
He's made a lot of mistakes.
Oh, really?
He's also the best ever.
Oh, really?
So of the top 10, it's a one-on-one match.
It's a one-round fight it out.
Who you got right now?
So you're saying if you got in a ring with Jon Jones right now.
He'd beat the shit out of you.
He'd beat the shit out of you.
And then who's next after that? Fuck.
That I can beat? Yeah.
That's in the UFC? Yeah.
CM Punk?
There it is.
You heard it right there.
That's going to go viral. But if you're currently
training,
those guys are just, they're on that level.
Yes. Yeah, it's like, yeah.
I'd rather see you two fight, to be honest.
I would fight Callan.
That would be fun.
That would be funny.
That would be fun.
Yeah.
He thinks he can beat you up right now.
What?
Oh, yeah.
I didn't hear what he said.
Callan thinks he can beat me up.
Oh, I know, I know, I know.
Callan thinks he can beat me up.
Yeah, he's just crazy.
Would you guys roll, for real?
Callan, yeah.
We should do that.
Okay.
Yeah, we should, actually.
I don't fuck Callan, though. You think? If we Okay. Yeah, we should actually. I don't fuck Callan.
You think?
If we roll.
Throw my weight around.
If we roll.
He's a little man.
Straight up only roll.
He's small.
He's a little man.
I would definitely win, I think.
He's a little man.
He doesn't do that shit.
Nick's bigger than him.
He's also 54.
Right, exactly.
And he's very small.
Yeah, he's small.
He's a small dude.
He's small.
He did sweep Bradley Martin.
That was pretty good.
He did.
He's very strong.
Like he's incredible. Yeah, I had no idea. Really? He beat me. He did sweep Bradley Martin. That was pretty good. He did. He's very strong. Like, he's incredible.
Yeah, I had no idea.
Really?
He beat me.
What?
I beat him, and he beat me twice.
He's so strong.
What?
I had no idea.
I wouldn't say he's so strong, but yeah.
You wouldn't.
For a 50, what, 56, 55?
54?
Yeah.
And I'm bigger than him.
58?
Is he 77?
I don't know.
He's 50-something.
Wow.
Yeah, but I've seen it. I used to go to the same boxing place as him. Oh, yeah. Yeah, he's like, you know. Yeah, know. He's 50-something. Wow. Yeah, but I've seen it.
I used to go to the same boxing place as him.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, he's like, you know.
Yeah, yeah.
He's a little scrapper.
Yeah, yeah.
Oh, for sure.
And he has a bad temper.
Yeah, yeah.
He kind of has a horrible temper.
Anybody could beat me up.
I'm not a fighter.
I'm not a fighter.
I'm the one that's like, I'm calling the cops on you.
See, that's why it'd be fun if you picked a celebrity to fight besides you.
I said you.
Sean Hannity's great.
Bill Maher, I'd fuck him up, too.
Wow. You punch him right in that nose. I love that show, too. great. Bill Maher. I fuck him up too.
Wow.
You punch around that nose.
I love that show too.
I love Bill Maher.
Yeah, me too,
but I want to beat him up.
That's it.
That's it.
Great.
Cool.
All right.
Love you guys.
Peace. Thank you.