The Golden Hour - Nick meets Donald Trump | The Golden Hour #94 w/ Brendan Schaub, Erik Griffin & Chris D'Elia
Episode Date: August 23, 2024The guys talk activities they do with their kids including reading books, playing the Wolfenstein video game and shooting ducks. Also, Nick describes meeting Donald Trump for Theo Von's podcast and th...e guys talk Chinese electric cars, the evolution of forensic technology, kids kissing their parents on the lips, extinct animals, worst and best coffee and much more! Get two extra episodes every month at https://patreon.com/thegoldenhourpodcast Away - Head on over to https://awaytravel.com/goldenhour to see the new softside luggage from Away DraftKings - Download the DraftKings Sportsbook app NOW and use code GOLDEN
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We're friends that laugh, we're friends that shout
Sometimes we don't know what we're talking about
But that won't stop us
Nothing can stop us
As I show you, use the love, just rebrand it enough
It's stronger, bigger power cuz it is the golden hour
Let's get into it dog. So I had a six-month doctor's appointment with wolf
Okay, and the doctor was, are you reading to him?
And I was like, ooh, not really.
You said reading?
Yeah, reading.
So then I did it.
So last night, it was late, I had him in a rocking chair
and I was reading a book that I wanna read.
And it was amazing, because I'm reading the book
and he was just sitting there
and he was just looking up at me like this.
You know? Was it Harry Potter? I'm gonna read Harry Potter. I figured it'd be Harry Potter. But this was it was a comedy book
I wanted to read. I know I started with Lord of the Rings, but I do want I am gonna read him Harry Potter
Cuz I want to do all the voices
Oh that'd be dope. I want to be like, Harry!
That's for you, that's for you. I would pay. I can't wait to do that. Dude, I would pay you to do that at my house.
That'd be sick. All the voices. No me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me, no me That'd be sick. No, me. No, me.
You.
Joe, I was like, can you get him out of here?
I'm like, shh.
I might even dress up.
Oh, damn.
But it was just like, you know.
How is he weight-wise?
What is he?
He's almost 19 pounds.
Where was he on the, you know, when they're like,
he's in the 99 percentile.
Oh, he's still, yeah. He's still. Bigile. Oh, he's still, yeah, he's still,
yeah, she's like, yeah, he's off the charts tall.
He's in the upper percentile for weight.
And we're just like, all right, cool.
You know?
He looks like a little grown ass mando
sometimes on his face when we see,
cause then I like getting them around other babies.
So we were around some other babies just that past days
and you're just looking and you're like,
You realize those other babies ain't shit.
You know, you're just like, oh wow.
You know what I'm saying?
Yeah.
Yeah.
You're like, oh yeah, he's a big boy.
Yeah.
Now you gotta put my daughter on keto.
You're just like, you know when you're like
around other babies and like your baby could do something
that your baby can't or the other baby is doing something
and you're on the same age.
You're just, yeah, you're just kinda like, oh.
But it's always great when you're like,
yeah, he can stand up.
And like, you know. It's a subtle oh. But it's always great when you're like, yeah, he can stand up.
It's a subtle flesh.
He's walking like, yours will get there.
No, Dan will be like, yeah, right.
But then you see these Instagram.
I saw an Instagram video of this little six-month-old
full-on walking.
Well, there's always that.
And I'm like, ugh.
I just look.
You look over at your kid.
What are you doing?
Yeah.
Do something.
Do something with your life.
Dude, you would like this, because T's still on summer break, so are you doing? Yeah. Do something. Do something with your life. Dude, you would like this,
cause T's still on summer break,
so he has his PlayStation 5.
He's like, dad, I want a first person shooter.
I'm like, ugh, that's a little tough.
But I played first person shooters as a young man,
I'm all right, I got my issues.
I mean, it depends on what first person shooter.
I've got him Wolfenstein.
Okay, well.
That's where you kill Nazis.
That's about it.
If it's so violent.
Yeah, violence is all relative.
We'll see it eventually.
But the point is, I grew up on Wolfenstein,
but on the computer, this new one broke the graphics.
So he's like, dad, can you show me how to play it?
I'm like, yeah, I don't really know on here.
Me and your uncle Jay started on computer.
Two hours later, he's like, I'm like, shut up.
Here we go.
Dude, it's so good.
It's just like, Oh, my wife and kids. Oh God.
Someone get a message to them. I'm going to miss them so much.
You're just like, just be, be, be, be, be, be, be, be.
Wow. That would be crazy. Like if that's in the video,
if that's in the video game, oh my God. Oh no. You know,
I'm a single father and a BB BB BB what's
gonna be like that it's so good like that scene in gladiator you know when
he's like just promise me you take care of my wife and he's like they'll meet
you in the afterlife oh look that's the coldest thing in that movie man this is
what oh wow your kid plays huh huh? Yeah, bossy watches.
So the vibe right now is because it's so complicated.
Dad's the kind of the team captain.
I go through the levels.
They point out the guys and the ammo.
They'll be like, dad, you missed.
I'm like, I didn't see him.
And then I keep doing my thing.
My son has a chemistry set. My son's in charge of the pharmacy at my house.
No, I have...
That'd be hilarious.
He would love that actually, but we have...
My uncle sent him a thing where you shoot...
Rubber bands?
Little yellow balls. You know what? I have a video of it. I'll little yellow balls you know what I have
a video of it I'll send it to you guys and you can play it let me let me send it
to you oh oh god he loves feeding the duck dude it's a duck in there here I'm
gonna send it right here there it is it's on the golden hour touch and and
it's really fun and and he and so he just love shooting it and he loves
feeding the duck. And he-
Like a live duck?
No, no, no, no, no, of course not.
And it's a toy and this morning he woke up and he was, here it is, here it is.
There we go, and here we go.
So close, you saw that?
Wow.
You gotta hit that, it's hard.
Watch this though, watch, watch.
This is just a lot of clean
We got it he's crunk
He got it he got it crunk dude He likes to go get the balls and reload and then I shoot about to say there's about that
He's so this was a video about you playing with a toy. No, I don't know what that was
No, I'll check out my hair. He's just really into it, too
I want to make him happy on the duck to go nuts cuz I want to make him happy and then dude
I'm like he's like here here do he really wants me to do it and he's like I reloaded so yeah That's what reminded me what you were saying or he's just realized is that he's like, here, here, dude, he really wants me to do it. And he's like, I reloaded. So yeah, that's what reminded me of what you were saying.
Or he just realizes that he's like,
I don't really like this.
Here, dad, you seem to really enjoy this.
Because he'll just take the duck
and take the balls and feed the duck.
I mean, our shit's different.
We killing Nazis.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Well, I mean, I realize too,
so we're hunting ducks.
Well, my kid's six months.
I mean, he'd rather have the box that the thing comes in.
Oh, bro.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
So I just go like, don't give him that.
Just...
And crinkly things.
What was it like meeting our new president, Donald Trump?
It was pretty awesome, pretty surreal.
Where was it at?
His golf course.
Mine's gonna be wild.
In Florida?
Was it stupendous?
No, in Newark, New Jersey.
Oh, I'm sorry.
Yeah, it was.
How wild.
But yeah.
Was he cool?
Was he nice to you or no, you're the help?
There's like, it was so quick.
He walks in, talks to his team a little bit,
went and sat down.
When we took the picture, he goes,
these must be your geniuses, which I appreciated
and I hope it's still on camera.
I like that.
Try to find that picture.
Did it make you a bigger fan or you already uh
I'm really I pick him over the two sides. I don't know he's like cuz you're a normal human
I would like a presidential president but out of the choices we have now, I think I pick him right probably will vote RFK
Even though I I realize will not vote the picture you sent
I if everybody thinks that then we can never get rid of a two party system.
Preach, Nick.
Sure.
Again, it's like Boston Red Sox or Yankees.
Toronto Blue Jays.
All right, they're not fucking playing.
But Joe Carter was a great, great batter.
Really?
Paul O'Neill?
Oh, yeah, yeah. John O'Rood. Yeah, with a stupid helmet crazy he seems bigger
yeah he's very tall so I'm big Nick he's like six three six four he looks smaller
I think it's the wide-angle lens like this guy's head so it's not that no six
three yeah but he has boots on but why is his head so orange? I don't
know. What are you talking about? Was it a lot of makeup in person? Yeah. I mean it didn't
look that dark. That picture was alarming. It's pretty wild. Um his teeth are so white.
Yeah. So that dropped on Tuesday. Nothing about him is real. Look at that. He's got
work done. He had I mean you you you you mean you Real is bring down inflation. Am I right?
Only thing real is locking down the border
Will never get locked down
What do you got? Oh, no, I don't know he said he said uh
Wheels and walls two things that never go obsolete. Oh, wow
Okay. All right walls. Okay, all right.
Wheels and walls, huh?
All right.
Okay.
Cars might start flying soon, but yeah.
Then wheels and walls are fucked.
I got that.
Yeah, no, I got that.
Yeah, not for a hot second.
No, I know.
They're pushing the electric agenda.
That's electric cars,
I just wish they didn't just suck so much.
They don't suck.
Give it up, daddy.
I tell you what really needs to happen
is they need to open up the fricking trade with China.
They got way better cars than we do.
Yeah, I know.
They got quite a good one.
They have, they're way ahead of us.
They have gas engines in these electric cars
and they go a thousand miles.
Yeah, I know.
What are we doing?
What's our company called again? BDB. there's Brian that's great these are always hilarious
um yeah no but um well this is kind of but I'm telling you the super super
charger stations so it's weird you have Elon Musk only Tesla, okay, but now what's
happening is they're raising all the prices. So like you're going to a power
this is where I'm hearing from people that have Teslas. You're going to a
Subaru station now you're paying gas prices for electricity. Of course you are. If that's the case
then what's the incentive? Of course you are. Saving the planet. There's no incentive.
There's no incentive. It's just a new thing for business to make money.
It's like you know how skinny jeans were the thing for a while and then everyone has skinny jeans
Like we gotta make more money come out with Oh baggies in now then people buy baggies
That's why I go back and forth
But the thing too is that like even the like the prices of these cars are going down
Oh, I got into this uber cuz I got my car faces a uber guy
She picks me up in a Tesla and the guy just was going on and on about it
because he was like, he spent 70,000 on this Tesla.
And then three weeks later,
he could have got it for 10,000 less.
And then six weeks later,
he could have got it for 30,000 less.
He's really gonna get hurt
if he sees how much he's gonna gotta use one for.
The used markets.
Also Tesla's, how the interior is awful.
Garbanzo beans.
Garbage.
What have we done?
What?
For $70,000?
For a cheap car.
$70,000 is crazy.
I mean, look, it's just a regular car.
You know, if it's something whatever.
But man.
If you can go get it, it should not
be the same as getting a really nice Toyota Corolla.
Yeah. And that wife, nice Toyota Corolla. Yeah. You know what I mean?
And that wife dude, forget it, whatever.
It's going to be like, I'm in Oxnard coming up soon.
This weekend actually.
Yeah.
But the next weekend is really when you're going to want to go.
Come see me in Oxnard.
And then maybe go see Chris after that.
Maybe.
If you could even get tickets.
McAllen, Texas, Beaumont, Texas, Peterborough, Ontario, London, Ontario,
Duluth, Minnesota, Thunder Bay, Ontario. Check out all these places, man. I'm gonna be there.
Toronto.
Brea, August 29th.
No, no, no, no, no, Toronto, dude. Bismarck.
One night. Brea, August 29th. Come see me. Just booked that.
Brea, 25th.
When is it?
August 29th.
Oh. You just booked it?
Yeah.
So no one's gonna come.
It's too soon.
It's too soon. I said to him, I said, oh, so you don't want anybody to go. Why why it's the summertime?
They can't get people summer stuff summer's really tough
Me come on out August 29th show some support for God's sakes. What else you gonna do in the summer?
Maybe I'll convince this guy to come do some comedy again
What's this guy what?
Truck he's the guy who makes his own
Merch for you guys. What'd you say? He makes his own custom merch for you guys. What did you say?
He makes his own custom merch for you guys.
We've seen him before, right?
Yeah, yeah.
He finally made some for Brendan.
What's up guys, it's Lucas from New York, Wisconsin.
I'm the guy who thought you guys were smart.
Today I got Brendan's in.
Nice.
Got it in.
Bam, there it is.
Wow.
You got here is expect.
Nice brand shop pick for KKK for baseball since his son's a good baseball player.
Please strike out. I guess. Yeah. Love the stuff. Love you guys.
Young picture too. This is, this is a layered burn. Yeah, that is, that's a deep burn.
Also let's just like take the meaning out of it.
That's the worst looking t-shirt I've ever seen in my life.
He couldn't have you looking more like Aaron Hernandez.
I know.
You were like 22.
Dude, that was right when I was fighting.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Big boy with the cake.
Imagine you wearing that.
Ears were still good.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, they didn't go bad yet.
Nose was straight.
Handsome bastard, man. Well, yeah. I mean, yeah. Life just said, blub blub blub. Still confused. You know what I mean? Yeah, they didn't go bad yet. Nose was straight. Handsome bastard, man.
Well, yeah, I mean, yeah.
Life just said.
Still confused.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, still like.
Yeah.
Still just like.
So confused.
Wait, what?
That's what he said.
Just like, huh?
Yeah, yeah.
This is my impression of my son, Tiger.
Huh?
He's just a meathead.
You know what I'm saying?
Huh?
Fake play with three K's. Hey.
Lower case T, lower case B too.
That was a choice.
Sell that on the under market, man.
Sell on the dark web.
Let's take a little break boys,
cause listen, especially the two of you,
you guys be traveling.
Mm-hmm.
Y'all luggage look like shit.
Yeah.
I'm here to help you out.
Cause my friends at Away, they sent some Away,
their new soft luggage, dude
It's all I use I can't get enough of it. Seriously though. This it looks better than any old-school soft side suitcase
I don't know. They just came out to soft side stuff, right? Yeah, dude
Yeah, it's designed to be lighter than the others on the market, but also tough. It's just not this little soft suitcase
No, it's tough man and it in four of their best-selling sizes.
All right, they have the two carry-on sizes.
I only do carry-on.
Only carry-on.
Really?
Yep, and the four colors, black, blue, pink, or gray.
I have a black carry-on.
You have black, all right.
I have the gray one.
It's so good.
And it is great.
It does clean easy.
I love it.
I switched over to that one.
Yep, like I said, the bag's soft, but not super sensitive.
It's super durable, flexible, expandable,
because I'll be putting all my shoes in there.
You know what I'm talking about, do some sneaker heads.
I do, dude.
All right, dude.
You gotta check out the new soft side luggage from Away.
Head on over to awaytravel.com slash golden hour.
That's awaytravel.com slash golden hour.
See the new soft side luggage from Away.
Awaytravel.com slash golden hour.
Really is the best luggage.
I have no, like, have you ever thought about like just you want to peek at the dark web have you ever thought about dude how do you even get on it this one I'm
saying you gotta go on like a new browser right it's like a different
browser like tour or something I have no idea but I'm always thinking like I
always picture you go to the dark web and there's like the menu is like hire an assassin, you know
You know, I mean like yeah, it's like what's trending yes. Oh my god, I was getting their head cut off
She
Know you're like really? Oh wow hitman for 18 dollars in $00? He'll be gone forever. Oh you can get the bonus package. Yeah.
Two for one. You can keep the head. You almost feel stupid. I wouldn't know where to start. Like if you's a, Stupid. Like it's called Tor, right?
T-O-R and you have to get the browser.
You have to get, it's like getting Safari or getting,
But I've, I've,
Download it.
I use Duck.Go.
But that's, is that, that's not the dark web.
No, no, that's not the dark web.
This doesn't make,
But can I get to the dark web?
I saw a documentary on it.
You watch, so if you watch just any sort of like crime thing,
Right?
Anything. One time, you would be like,
how do people get away with anything?
Well, I don't think anyone really does, honestly.
That's what I'm saying.
If you think you're gonna get this thing on your like,
so the internet is connected,
you would have to go to the library or something
to like be, you know, to be like,
oh, okay, I wanna kill my neighbor.
Like, how does that even?
Also, I don't even think.
Why would you even, I don't even, I don't see how anybody gets away with anything no
neither do I I also think that they're gonna be able to do I don't think that
they're gonna be able to quite do like minority report shit like where they
like predict crimes but like you know how like in oh I can predict 79 or
whatever 82 like the first DNA forensics thing came out.
And then they were like, oh, well, let's just find
the cases from 10 years ago and then get those guys, right?
So it's advancing and advancing.
Pretty soon something's gonna happen where they're like,
where all the people who got away with shit
are gonna be like, oh, fuck, they can do that now.
You know what I'm saying?
And like, they're gonna be locked motherfuckers up for all.
Not only did they go, well, let's go to the 10 cases,
yeah, they also were like, eww, we're gonna have to let a lot of people
out of jail yeah and pay them a lot of true yeah once they got the DNA analysis
like test guys yeah I mean but because before they're just taking samples I
was like just wait no but I feel like the guy's like ah dude. It's just my cum and then later on they're like oh, no I came on everything
In and out you know
But I just sometimes I think about like the dark web I I feel like that's just a trap
I feel it's like oh, I do too like it's like Hansel and Gretel. Yeah, what kind of who's like?
Yeah, I need to get on the dark. I'm dumb go under a dark
I'd be like I need to kill my mother-in-law we got to figure this out their home
I'm dumb dumb go under a dark way be like I need to kill my mother-in-law. We got to figure this out their home
But I still feel like if I get on there somebody like it's me like fetch Yeah, well, I wasn't doing anything right you're searching how to kill your brother right right exactly, but you're that J
Beheading is trending
And a lot of it right I assume
The police are on there
like faking like,
well yeah for sure.
For sure, $22.
$22, like damn that's a steal and they're like,
God oh.
Yep.
That is a hilarious video.
This video is crazy.
Who is that?
Oh, Kamala Joe.
Ah!
Ah!
Ah!
Ah!
Ah!
Ah!
Ah!
Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Oh my god. His fingers were painted. That kid's a kid of shit.
It's honestly, AI, the weirdness of AI is the thing that really just gets me, man.
But you know, it reminds me of like any CGI.
Like there's a certain type of CGI where you just go, nah, that's not real.
Right? You know, sometimes in a movie
You don't maybe you don't know that that's CGI. Yeah, but then there's a time where you're just like, yeah
Yeah, the CGI it always it's something something's on the face like the CGI purpose the CGI in that in the Irishman
You're like bro. Yeah, it was bad. But yeah Indiana Jones. Oh, how dare you?
Yeah, but if you if you, well in three years,
it's just gonna be indistinguishable.
I mean, you're not gonna be.
Well, they're not even allowing it yet
because Hollywood's like, well, what are we,
Hollywood's like, yeah, we wanna use this.
If you could just type the words like,
interior, podcast, studio, three guys sitting, you know?
Yeah.
And then it can just do it.
But I heard a Hollywood.
There's no need for extras, there's no need for like,
and there's a video of Aston Kutcher talking about this.
That might even be a hot word.
But I heard a CGI guy breaking it down.
He's in Hollywood and he's like,
the reason why House of Dragons,
like they used a lot of real sets,
he was saying it's so expensive to build those,
like the big green wall and like,
to hire all those artists to build the actual like environment.
He's like, it's 20 times as expensive
than building a real set right now.
Like the price is ridiculous.
Right, now.
Right now, yeah, I'm sure you get it lower,
but that's the issue.
I don't, it's really weird.
I don't like the future right now.
Well, that's what everybody says all the time. They're always worried about the future. But when are they right? I think now. Maybe, I don't like the future right now. That's what everybody says all the time.
We're always worried about the future.
But when are they right?
I think now.
Maybe.
I don't know.
When I was a little kid,
and I was visiting my great aunt in Belize, okay?
Belize?
Yeah.
God damn.
And she, I remember she just got a refrigerator
and a television.
They just got it for the first time.
There was a whole thing about, she was like,
ooh, you gotta save electricity, unplug the refrigerator.
That was her thing.
And then there was another time she was like,
don't go to like a certain channel on the TV.
She was like, the devil was, really?
I'm just saying, does it?
That's funny, which one am I?
The middle one? Really?
You don't, but I'm not in the middle is what I'm saying.
This looks like two Dan Bilzerians in Chint.
It does.
Wow, the one on the left really looks like Dan Bilzerian.
But it's just like, you know,
people are always gonna be like, oh this looks scary.
Yeah, I know, I know, I know.
But it's like, a lot of people are still fearful of like,
you know, getting in a car that is self-driving.
Yeah. Yeah, Yeah, me.
But it's moving so quickly, though.
It's like that should be what we were scared of.
Not, oh my god, all this other stuff, too.
AI and you know what I mean?
Like, in the 50s or 60s, it was like people
were scared of rock and roll.
And now it's like.
And black people.
Right, right, and rightly so.
Yeah, and honestly it's.
I was just saying we're still scared of them.
No, kidding, kidding, jokes, jokes, jokes.
Shout out Atlanta.
You know what, Twitter is.
It's got, Moore's Law is like,
this guy said like the quality of computer chips
doubles every two years,
so it's like going exponentially fast or I tell like it's happening right now
It's just like we're getting so much stuff so fast. Yeah, the Unabomber
Spoke about this all the yeah
I know when I would talk to us when I would talk to him we would know I but
Was gonna say Twitter. I was on Twitter
People are are are
insanely racist on Twitter.
Everyone says that, I don't see. They're insanely racist.
I'm like, my jaw is on.
But everybody I know says this,
and maybe it's my algorithm, I don't see it.
Like Twitter's where I go for all my new, everything.
I don't see all the racism.
Like, no, but I saw this thing the other day
where it was like this black, picture of this black person
and somebody tweeted,
you think you hate them, but you don't hate them enough.
And it was like, oh my God, bro.
I thought about that for so long. Yeah, I know, but it's like, and then it was like, oh my god, bro. I thought about that for so long.
Yeah, I know, but it's like, and then it makes you,
and then if you look too much of it,
like I'm on the other side, I'm like, wow, this is crazy.
Like I'm looking at this, but if you have any sort
of misgivings or any sort of like weak mind,
you just, if you're flooded with that,
at what point are you like, well, that one's true, actually.
You know, and then this one.
And then it's like, it's crazy, bro.
It's crazy.
But that's the balance you have to make.
If you say you want open forum,
then it has to be an open forum for all.
I know.
And then, you know.
But there's consequences to everything you do.
Both have trouble.
Both are trouble, yeah.
It's an interesting...
Yeah.
Because it's almost like, oh, not everyone should get free speech.
But then you say that, like, that's not fair.
I know, but the whole neo-Nazi thing online is tough.
Yeah, but again, free speech isn't what people think it is.
The First Amendment is not like...
People just don't have a full understanding of what that is.
And again, you can't... And they always use the example of in a movie theater, what that is and you know, it's like again like you can't you know
And they always use the example of in a movie theater. You can't just scream like fire
Like yeah, but that's free speech like no dumb this consequences also like if you say something you go
I have the free speech to say this well
Then I also have the free speech to be like I disagree with that and I don't think that it goes back and forth and back
And forth. It's like what are we talking about? Yeah, and then it gets to the trans issues and then we're just like, okay
I don't really know
Right, right and then it's like you then you know, you can't even have they say free speech, but they don't really want a discussion
No, they want free speech as long as you're agreeing with their dad issue
It's like so annoying to me. I would say like, you could just say the word transgender
and if somebody zip lines down.
Blah, blah, blah, blah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
You're homophobic?
This is transphobic.
Yeah, yeah.
You know?
They love to use the word problematic.
Yeah.
When you hear problematic, that's somebody
that doesn't wanna have a discussion, Greg.
That's some bullshit statement where it's like,
well hey, I just wanna ask about what's going on with this
and they're just like, this is problematic.
You're like, oh wow.
I was reading this thing about,
oh fuck what the hell was I saying?
Oh, on the apps for, there's like apps for lesbians
to meet each other and these dudes are just going on it
and like, I'm a woman and some of them are like
You know trans women and some of them are just like it's just like a guy you would see at the supermarket
But he identifies as a woman dude. I'm a chick. Yeah, and he's like
And then the lesbians like what the fuck he's like what my pronouns are her and he's playing your game, baby
You know what I mean?
And it's just weird, man.
Well, you know, it always cycles through.
So like, you know, the Ozempic thing comes, right?
And then people are clowning people for being on Ozempic.
So then Kelly Clarkson comes out and she's like,
OK, yeah, I did that.
That was tough for me to lose weight.
And then Joy Taylor from The View, she's like,
well, nobody wants to be fat.
I'm like, wait.
Where was the energy on everyone's view?
What happened to fat positivity?
It's just used when it's convenient.
Correct.
Or it's the cool thing to do in your view.
So now it's like, we've been saying,
nobody wants to be that fat.
I know how hard it is to lose weight.
Facts.
It's hard to lose weight.
Yep.
You know what I mean?
Facts.
I don't like how you're looking at me.
No, I'm vibing.
Facts, it's hard for him to lose weight.
No, I'm vibing.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Just saying.
With a little bit of this too.
You know what I mean?
A little up and down eye.
Elevator eyes.
Elevator eyes.
It is very hard to lose weight.
Facts.
But don't sit here and act like,
I always say, I had this joke about this.
It would be like if somebody,
it'd be like if you don't graduate from college,
but you're like, you wanna get a good job.
And then people are like, well you're not,
and you're like, oh you're not intelligence positive.
Right, right, right, right.
You're educational shaming me? Yeah, yeah. It's like, yeah, you're not intelligence positive. Right, right, right, right. You're educational shaming me.
Yeah, yeah.
It's like, yeah, you're fucking dumb.
Yeah, yeah.
So it's like.
You didn't do the requirements
what it takes to get skinny or to educate yourself.
And now you want the same benefits.
That's what that is.
That's what that happens to.
That's why when people do that, it's such a great troll.
Right, I know, yeah.
Well, it's like that guy who went, what was it,
like the shop teacher?
The big titty guy.
Yeah, dude.
So funny.
I don't know if that was real or like that.
He was trolling.
He was trolling, yeah.
That wasn't real.
But then also, did you see Homeboy?
He's been on Rogan, but he was like,
oh, you wanna see how ridiculous this is?
I'm gonna say I'm a woman and enter in the strongman contest
against other women and set all the records in six months. I was like cool
There you go, dude
And the records will never be broken sometimes. Can you go with your like can we just use our eyes?
There's like there's an eye test. Yeah, it's just like they say this in sports when you see a person
They got an intangible thing that boxer
Just your eye test right just your eye test you'd be like well this looks
different yeah you're talking about the one in the Olympic yeah you're being
homophobic wait now that's what they say but there's the thing though people were
saying like you this is a man this is you know and then people are saying like
well no she was actually born a woman people are saying that so I don't know
what to believe so I'm just like I'm out of the whole thing she's XY chromosome
okay so you're out that that's. That's what I've heard.
Those are facts.
But now just playing devil's advocate, says who?
The facts.
The World Boxing Commission.
And that's why she couldn't compete at that level.
The World Boxing Commission.
But the Olympics didn't.
Said that she has too many chromosomes.
And too high testosterone.
Yeah, too high testosterone.
And the Olympics did.
Yeah, the Olympics were like, no, we're good.
But this is. And then the Olympics also let a dude who's a pedophile and served in
prison compete as well where and what mmm something lame he's a swimmer but
Chris Chris Chris this is what I'm saying about this this person uh-huh if it was
someone that looked like say Kristen right right right you know and they had
these things about the person.
But you'd be like, but yeah, but that, you know,
she looks dainty.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
She looks like that, that looks fair.
Yeah, I let my daughter fight her.
And then I'm saying, it looks fair, right?
Right, right, right.
All I'm saying is this, regardless of what's true or not,
that person-
It doesn't look right.
Doesn't look like they should be punching a woman.
And it makes it worse that you went on to like dominate when the gold you don't
think it's not that's all I'm saying it's like it doesn't people are like she
lost before I'm like yeah she's shitty male but so because right there that's
her as a little girl and that looks like a little girl yeah but that on the left
looks like fucking yeah I don't know yeah well you have something like it
wouldn't be like taking steroids or something
Well, right exactly. Yeah density reaction time
So many benefits just look like I just like you know, you want to support this person do your thing, right?
Whatever your journey is that you're gonna look whatever's happening. Okay fine this but all we're saying is like when you're putting this person
Yeah in their journey into other people's journey and it seems like there's like a huge advantage maybe well
there should just be trans boxing yeah there'd be two welcome there'd be three
of them there'd be three of them yeah I know yeah well do when you look at like
that's what that's it that's the minority sense because when you go to
you go to a golf course they have a man's tee and they have a woman's tee. Why is that? When you go to a golf course.
Yeah right. You know they have like you know yeah they handicap things for
these kinds of stuff you know. Men and women don't. You don't see anybody
complaining about that though right? Why aren't women like we're equal we're
gonna hit from this tee. The men's team. Keep that same energy.
No, no, first of all, it's not the women
that are supporting this.
It's definitely a sport that men are men
and women are women.
Golf is like a crazy, like,
they just let black people in like two weeks ago.
They're old school, man. Those country clubs. Even Tiger Woods walked in like, oh weeks ago. Exactly, yeah, yeah. They're old school, man.
Those country clubs.
Even Tiger Woods walked in like, oh.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Haven't been in here.
So, yeah, I don't know, man.
I mean, what's this?
The average yards off the tee, these are men.
Oh, OK.
The average number one guys, 326.
There you go.
Rory McIlroy, 326.
And then you got the woman over here,
Zhaowen Yin, 277.
Polymax.
Polymax, 280 to 330 basically.
It's all a big difference.
Yeah, that's crazy.
He doesn't have the, why doesn't he have the.
And then Dottie, 235.
Well, so I don't know. He doesn't have the, why doesn't he have the? And then Dottie at 235.
Well, so I don't know.
I have a question for you guys during this break.
Are you hungry for some college football or what? I don't like how you said hungry.
But are you hungry for it?
Cause we finally get, cause we finally can get
a taste this weekend.
And I know you're super into college football.
Dude, you like Notre Dame?
What do you think?
Notre Dame takes A&M?
What are we thinking?
Possibly.
I'll tell you what I don't like is missing any of the action.
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Didn't one girl in the Olympics quit?
Cause she was like, I can't take that.
She got hit in the face from that X, Y chromosome ladyboy.
I was like, fuck I'm out.
I mean ladyboy now.
Fuck this man.
So what happens if you're X, Y,
if you have an extra X, Y chromosome.
You're a man.
So you, you, so what do we have?
XY.
Okay, and then women have?
XX.
Okay, so, okay, so then that's a person with XY,
but maybe has a vagina.
That's what they're born with both,
but born with X, born with gonads.
So it's getting the benefits like a male does.
Gonads is the thing that-
I don't like that name.
I don't know what, like my son just,
it's like kicking me in the nuts is,
it's just like become a thing
that is just gonna be a part of my day.
But Calvin is just like,
and I'm just like, oh God, oh!
And I need to tell him to stop doing it.
Yeah. Yeah.
But, but, but I, how?
Honestly, if you think about it.
Kick him in the nuts. Well, so. know what I know what you issue might be too is like you're very expressive.
Yeah. You know, so you know, you give him a reaction where he's like, oh, look,
dad's gonna do that thing he does when I kick him in the nuts. Right, right. And you're gonna be
like, you know, yeah, you know what I mean? Exactly. So now you have to be like, and I don't really
react that much. You know, he can be nuts and I just go like this.
You gotta get your principal voice. So you guys start going, Hey,
so, so I, I want to say like, Hey, don't kick me in the balls. But I don't want Calvin run around being like, hey, balls.
You know what I mean?
He's fucking four.
So I'm like, so I just picked, I got, he hit me once
and I was, and I didn't know what to say.
And I just said, oh man, hey, don't kick my gonads.
Dude, he fell out.
He thinks it's funny.
Now all he says is gonads.
I know, I don't mean to kick your gonads.
I don't mean to kick your gonads.
Dude, he says gonads all the time
and it's hilarious.
And I'm like, that's actually probably okay.
You think gonads is better involved?
You just needed to give him one good like,
after he did that, you needed to go,
hey, this is how that feels.
Don't do that.
I know, but I can't do that.
Hey, it's gonna hurt, buddy, it hurts.
Have you ever get hit in the gonads?
And he was like, no.
So he starts going to school.
Who kicked me in the gonads? They're like, roast. And then, he starts going to school. You know, who kicked me in the gonads?
They're like roast and then he's gonna get lit up.
I can't bro.
I am the best dad.
I am the best dad for that kind of shit.
I cannot wait until my son comes home and says,
man, kids are making fun of me because of this.
I go like this.
Okay, dude, that's my whole personality from now on.
That's my whole personality.
That's our whole personality from now on. Keep my whole personality That's our whole personality from now on keep keep going keep making them make fun of you. We're getting the outfits
We're doing everything we're adding to it because this is now the coolest shit ever
Like in the classroom and Chris is like at the window just like do it
Make them make funny you more
Oh, it's cool yeah dude I cannot wait right in burns for the other kids
yeah yeah yeah that would be great yeah you know that one fat kid tell him this
yeah I know that one tall too tall kid looks awkward. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I Don't know. It's just one of those like don't go cuz sick at six months. They hit a lot
Yeah, Oh Billy. Yeah, they hit a lot. So
Wolf is just he's on me and he's just hitting me like that
That's boy shit. Yeah
Two little boys they don't know nothing about nothing you put them in a room together
They start playing if they pick up sticks game immediately. Yeah, they're doing swordplay. Oh, yeah
They're just naturally like weird. We're conquerors. Tell me I put on dresses
And you're gonna vote for that and you're gonna vote for that
You're on Nick's vibe
No, I don't know. I just can. I don't know, you're on Nick's vibe, that bullshit. I like an RFK too. I just can't get past that voice.
Like go fuck yourself.
Oh, it's tough to listen more than 10 seconds.
Good thing to base your presidential vote on.
Yeah, the voice.
Hey, sorry.
Just have him suck on some helium
before he speaks every time, that'd be great.
Oh, wow.
He needs a sausage.
No, yeah, Billy just started hitting.
Just started?
Yeah, I know, he hasn't been doing it.
He really wasn't doing it.
Oh wow.
And, but he, cause he goes like, it was really cute
because we'll say like, we'll be like, okay, time for bed.
And then we'll be like, give me a kiss.
And he'll just go like this.
You know what I mean?
I'll like put his mouth on your face.
And it's so cute.
And all of a sudden, like a few days ago, it became,
give me a kiss. And he just goes like this.
Pshh.
And you go, oh.
But they say you're supposed to not react to it.
Yeah.
It's just hard as fuck.
I know.
You know what it is?
I'll ground you.
What it is is because they're learning.
They're learning.
Oh, if I do this, I get a reaction.
Yeah, down juice.
Speaking of kissing, I gotta tell you guys this.
Yeah.
I'm out in Beverly Hills with
Rachel. We just went to the doctor's and now we go to lunch in Beverly Hills. That's where
the doctor is. Anyways, we go to this restaurant and there's a family sitting outside and the
dad, now this kid was like, he might have been tiger's age. He looked like a grown ass kid,
but a kid. The dad goes over to the kid and the son and the dad
kiss each other on the lips right okay and I was like oh that's sweet
mm-hmm but it happened like three times so yeah here's the thing and I was just
like but listen I wasn't trying to be like no that's how you felt it's just
how you felt it's just how I felt but I felt I get it I thought it was just a
moment I thought I was like oh when do you stop like look when do you stop doing that? Yeah, like I mean cuz here's the thing
I don't kiss my kids on the lips
You know, it's never nice gay. No, it's not
Bro, it's not gay dude. Yeah, if he's like 10
Yeah, but then at that point at that point the kid is like knows to not do it
You know I'm saying like the kidney you know this kid
The first one I was like oh, that's a very that's loving gesture, but it was like I looked I'm looking yeah
And then it happened again. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's it was a part of me that was like oh yeah like
what the fuck yeah you guys ever saw that crazy did he kiss him yeah on the
nose or what no it was probably just like you know they were you know I mean
I got it and Charles Barkley talked about he was like I love this guy that's
what you know so so here's the deal. They had a race.
They challenged each other.
Oh, I bet Charles Barkley won.
And Charles Barkley, yeah he did.
He was like, you know.
Oh yeah, no shit.
And so, the other guy's ET, so.
He, no, but my.
That guy's fucking chmingle.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Don't he, didn't he beat one of the greatest
basketball players of all time in a sprint?
Picture Calvin now in like fifth grade,
and he's doing just like that, you know?
That's what's gonna be great.
You know, the kids are like,
you're fucking, yeah, yeah, I saw what you're doing.
But anyways guys, the science project.
Like my kids-
You're gonna get a call that he's a bully.
God, dog.
I'm gonna go like this, oh, I'll talk to him.
Yeah.
That's Joe Biden.
Oh man, that's Brian Cowan. That's Brian Cow, that's Joe Biden
My kids don't even go for the for the kisses with me on the lips they'll do it to their mom but not to me Yeah, I get I mean gay we figure that you probably don't do it. But I know yeah, we figured we knew that you yeah
We don't play that shit. It's the same reason why you don't see racism on Twitter. But anyway.
Faggot.
Yeah, because I'm tweeting it.
He doesn't see homophobia.
He doesn't see.
I don't see.
It's great.
I'm the guy.
I'm not even trying to be like whatever.
But I just, it was because it happened one time.
So I just thought I was like.
That's alarming.
Yeah, I get it.
I just was like, oh, am I going to do that?
Right, but here's the thing, though.
You were in Beverly Hills.
There was a high chance that they were not American.
Oh, they weren't?
Right.
In different cultures, they do different shit.
So it's like, thank you for bringing that up.
That's a good point.
And that's why we dominate.
No, that's a great point.
No, my, my, my, my.
OK, so Kristen, we were at, I think we were in.
Wait, but hold on.
You don't have a little girl.
Would you let it, see, with boys, with their mom,
I don't have an issue with unless you're like 15,
like what the fuck's going on here?
But if it's a little girl with a dad, I'm okay with that.
Well, no, unless it, but-
If they're like six and under.
Right, yeah.
If the girl's like 14, you know,
bumping gums with her dad.
It's all kind of, dude. No, no, no, noing gums with her dad.
Dude.
No, no, no, no, wait, wait, wait.
In fairness, anything that's inappropriate, you know it when you see it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You know what I mean?
It's like, no, you got no problem being like-
But unless you're Kristen, honestly, because Kristen, dude, at the airport was like, okay,
my alarm bells are going off. I just saw a man with a boy and they're holding hands.
And I'm like, babe, is it his dad?
And she's like, it could be, but my mom bells are going off.
She'd be the worst detective.
So I was like, well, babe, are they foreign?
And she was like, I don't know dude I walk
over to the thing it's Kristen Karen it said it's they're both so blonde it's
obvious at data and the Sun okay all right and and then she's like come look
come look I come look and I'm like not not as I'm looking, the wife comes up and it's just like, Hey guys. And I'm like,
yeah, this is a family.
Yeah. She's also Swedish family.
Hey, puts her phone down from the nine one one. She's like, okay, hey,
but also what do you want me to do? Hey, that's enough of that.
I mean, yeah, no, no, no, it's because mama bears,
they like see all this stuff about, I she's just like on TikTok, Instagram,
and they see all these things about like,
be on the lookout for like, human trafficking
and all this kind of stuff.
So DDP, Drikas Duplessis, who just retained his title
against, can't remember.
He always kisses his coach,
and so people are always giving him shit.
And the explanation was that he's, uh, South African and that's what they do
there. But then during the fight, there were a couple of moments where you just
kissed them.
Grab the way, check this cup there.
Just make sure it's on straight.
I just checking to make sure his cups on straight.
And then there's, yeah, but then, but also Yeah. But then- But also, it's different.
Like, you just won a world championship.
That's your team.
OK, cool.
Let me check the anus.
Oh my god.
Let me put my mouth on it.
Yeah.
There's a way to do that, that it doesn't have to look.
Yeah, yeah.
You straight up got on his knees to do it.
It is not.
There's a way you do it.
Wait, people had a problem with him doing that?
It's funny, no, but it's funny the way it looks.
It just looks funny.
It just looks funny, yeah.
Yeah, like that.
Why did he put his face down first?
It's really funny.
His face got cock level before his knees hit the ground.
You know what, you know what, man?
Sometimes, this is what,
I'm so glad we was looking at this.
Sometimes, this has nothing to do with politics or vibes.
Sometimes shit just looks funny.
Yeah, it's funny, yeah.
It's just like that, it's a fake story or not,
I don't care about JD Vance fucking the couch.
That just sounds funny.
Oh, right, right, right.
It just sounds funny.
So some guy hit me up and he was like,
are you really going to believe this?
And he sent me a picture, some story about the vice
president for the Democrats.
Yeah.
And I wrote the guy back, I go, hey man,
this is just funny, zero fucks I give about it.
You know what he wrote me back, he was like,
ah man, I'm just vibing.
And I was like, ah dude, open with that.
So many people hit me up with stuff now,
and I just go, you gotta open with, I'm vibing.
And I get it, it's just funny.
Sometimes things are just funny.
Look at this, this is the one I'm sure he said yes horse semen. Yeah, and it's not real but it is that's pretty funny
I'm a podcaster. I'm gonna talk about
Fucking a cow yeah, I was like I was like oh I had like a toilet paper thing there and I was like I get it
You might go back to that like I'm trying to Smash yeah, yeah, it's a guy thing. Let me see the picture of the guy so on the left. That's him after he got pumped
And on the right, that's him when he realized he had to get pumped
Wait a minute. I have too much semen in my I have too much horse semen in my Smith
Yeah, those kind of what I'm saying is sometimes those things are just funny and like we live in a world now where it's like
Everything has to go to like an agenda. Yeah, I know I know
I know it's not true though. I know but it's fun
Conspiracies exist it's better than the truth most of the time the truth ain't that well the Internet's all about that
It's like, you know people want this is Wow
Is this weird? Do guys? What's this?
I thought...
I haven't seen it.
That's Kamala Harris' stepdaughter?
Is it her stepdaughter?
I didn't know that.
I'm pretty sure, yeah.
I guess, yeah, she looks pretty white.
But that's Kamala's husband and that's his daughter.
Okay, so hold on.
That's Kamala's husband.
Kamala's husband.
And he has a finger looped into her jeans.
Oh, and that's her...
That's his...
Her stepdaughter, his real daughter.
His real daughter, okay, okay, go ahead.
So woke, I don't get it.
Her daughter looks completely normal.
Is that a cape she's wearing?
And people think that that's really weird?
To have a finger in the jeans?
People do, but it-
It seems like he doesn't really know
what he's even doing.
Yeah.
No, yeah.
No, but this is what I'm saying.
People take this campaign, and now it turns into something else.
People take like, when you comment on something,
they take your comment as like, oh, well, that means you must
support.
It's like, no, I didn't.
I'm laughing at this.
This is funny.
The presidential, like, the whole campaigns,
it's like, who's better at social media?
Dude, it's not like that.
No policies or like foreign affairs. All that's out the window. It's like, who's better at social media. Dude, and I hate it. It's no policies or like foreign affairs.
All that's out the window.
It's like who's better at promoting the news thing.
If Walsh, whatever his name is,
if he got come in him, I don't care.
If JD Vance fucked the couch, great.
No, Walsh is-
What does it have to do?
What I'm saying is like, let's let people's stuff in the past.
Some of that stuff just like, hey, this is out of context. Or even with the dressing up as a woman, they were trying to use that as like, let's let people's stuff in the past. Some of that stuff just like, hey, this is out of context.
Or even with the dressing up as a woman,
they were trying to use that as like,
oh, you're a hypocrite.
He was like, he was at Yale.
It was like a frat thing.
And it's like, that shouldn't even be brought up.
No, Waltz's thing is him lying about his service
in the army.
That's the alarming thing.
That's his track record.
What I'm saying is like, there's not funny about that. No, that's not funny. You know what I mean? But some of his other stuff,
they're trying to bring up and then like, you know, even if you comment on it, you're just like,
whatever. Like all the personal stuff, it's like- Who wants to go to the military?
Well, no, it's like saying, hey, and making a joke. Oh my God, Trump is so orange.
I'm not voting for him because he's orange.
I'm like, you're missing the point.
No, but then people will be like,
oh dude, you're a fucking Democrat?
And you're like, huh?
No, it's just funny.
Oh, this is the one I hate too.
I'm sorry I left that comment.
You say, oh he's orange, and then they're gonna be like,
well have you seen Kamala?
Yeah, right, right, right.
And I'm like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
We're not, I don't, dude, that infuriates me.
I like that energy.
When you're talking about this
and then people wanna bring up,
what about the other side?
It's like, oh hey, we can have a conversation
about the other side, but right now,
we're talking about this.
And this is what's fun.
You can, well dude, the president is like
one of the most visible people in the world.
You're just gonna be made fun of.
It doesn't matter left or right.
Whoever the president is is gonna be made fun of.
Trump is gonna be Trump. No matter who it is.
That's what I'm saying.
And Trump gives you material.
And Trump is funny, yeah.
Funniest.
SNL was saved because of him.
Yeah, true.
They should send him a gift basket every week.
Yeah.
Like, thank you.
Yeah.
You guys wanna look at some extinct animals?
Oh, okay.
Oh, shit.
I would like to.
Whoa.
Tasmanian tiger? That's crazy. Looks like a deer-ish type of thing. I would like to. Whoa. Tasmanian tiger?
That's crazy.
Looks like a deer-ish type of thing.
That is just weird.
Oh, dude.
This is AI.
That is-
No, it's real.
Honestly, that is fucking,
that's the thing in, what do you call it?
The Will Smith movie.
I Am Legend?
Yeah.
Didn't they, aren't they like figuring ways
to like bring back and you know.
Golden moments.
Yeah, they're doing Drask Park.
So they're like a willy man.
Yeah, yeah.
Toad, these are done?
No more?
They went and stick to 1989?
I'll make those right now.
Those gotta be poisonous, right?
No, I'll make those.
Yeah, those are super poisonous.
Yeah.
What's that, a zebra dog?
Quagga.
Oh, it's a zebra dog.
My Quagga. That picture was made a zebra dog. My Quagga.
That picture was made the same way they made that.
Yeah, I think they all look real.
The one, the grassy, old guy that got killed.
Yeah.
Killed JFK.
Lee Harvey Oswald.
That's like the Lee Harvey Oswald picture.
What's this one?
A dodo bird?
What is this?
A lace and rock?
There's probably a reason these stupid animals are gone.
Look at this.
Look at this fucking stupid thing.
Look at this thing. Just traveling
Yeah, we don't we don't need that
Hold on was this a bear lion? That's a
Barbary lion
No, dude, they don't have him anymore that's a weathered lion bro, that's an exhausted lion
It's pretty looking over his pride. It does have like a saber tooth. Yeah, it's a bear lion
Was this one?
Oh, that's great footage.
That's a dolphin.
Hold on.
What is it?
That's a dolphin.
A Baji extinct in 2000.
Oh yeah, okay.
It's a Walfon.
I used to hang out with a bunch of Bajis.
Nothing on that?
What's this one?
Oh no, that's a human.
They're still around.
That's a really tiny person.
Tarpen photographed in 1884. These animals are stupid. Well, they're just kind of like. That's a really tiny person. Tarpen. Photographed. 1984.
These animals are stupid.
Wait, what?
Well, they're just kind of like...
That's a parrot.
They're faking being other animals when really they're just parrots and goats and shit.
Uh, hold on.
No, no, I want to see them, Nick!
Okay.
Heath Hens.
That's like a bunny hen, huh?
That's pretty funny.
That fucking thing is retarded, right?
Chris is into these things.
He's digging. He's trying to find somethingarded, right? Chris is into these things.
He's digging, he's trying to find something.
Come on, keep going.
Hold on, what was this one?
Bolly tiger?
Whoa, that's a weird looking one.
That looks like a regular tiger.
Yeah, no, I don't wanna go that far.
I don't wanna go that far.
It looks a little different, come on.
Does it?
What's the last time you give me?
There we go, the dick turtle, come on.
Now we got the erection turtle, we got it lonesome George the final Pinta
I was towards tiger in person. Is that is that that's that's basically the Sibian tortoise
What a tiger in person like in the lot in the wild no no no at the zoo
Yeah, I was doing a show
I was doing a show Vegas and that this particular show is sharing a stage with a magician who?
Tigers so backstage they had to do
This like in the 90s. No, it's illegal now, right?
Yeah, cuz Roy and homeboy got bitten the fucking now also these have the tiger in or the lion in MGM and other don't
He that tiger was trying to save him. Oh
Whatever you vibing. No, I'm serious. No, you never know what a tiger
That's how tiger say people like rip their necks off. No. No, the guy was having a stroke save him from depression
The guy was having a stroke. Oh, I know he bit him cuz he's gay. No, they were saving him from a life of depression
There is daddy's good. He's happy. I was backstage and I the tiger cage
Yeah
You look at a tiger in the eyes, like,
the guy said like, if a ball, if you have a ball
and it falls into the tiger cage,
that ball is now that tiger's ball,
cause they're very possessive about things.
No shit.
But I just felt like the way the tiger was looking at me,
that if that cage opened,
Game over.
Game over.
That tiger's like.
It didn't feel like it wanted to do anything but eat me.
Yeah, yeah.
That tiger's like, please let me
Yeah, yeah, see what happens just was looking like this and I was like, oh shit
Yeah, looks like I go like this if this cage opens up Eric's not gonna be an Oxnard
But I am August 23rd to the 25th that's this weekend
Those shows are like it the Tigers like the Tigers like Eric a making that Brea show to them right now
As Roy led mananticore onto the stage,
it's rumored that something in the crowd spooked the tiger
and it advanced toward the audience.
Immediately, Roy put himself between the tiger
and the people, commanding him to lie down.
Instead of obeying his owner,
Manticore grabbed Roy's hand and bit down.
Roy shouted at the animal. Dude, Manticore, Roy's hand and bit down
dude manticore you know? that's not the one he just bit his hand there he actually
the tiger actually did he die I don't know how they carry their cubs it was
doing he was doing that yeah he was carrying him to safety there's footage
of it yeah oh there's definitely footage of it. it was on stage and the guy talked about it afterwards
I heard I heard gay blood's different.
The tiger was like, oh, oh.
This is why he don't see shit on Twitter.
It's hashtag gay blood.
All right, yeah, so that's.
Should that be the name of the episode, gay blood?
Their blood's sweeter, I heard.
That fucking tortoise was crazy, huh?
With the big ass dick in it.
Yeah, it looked like a tortoise, right?
But it was fucking long and shit.
Well, that sucks for that tortoise
because it's probably instinct
because the way they survive is they go into the shell.
They go back in and he can't.
With that big dick.
I can't fit.
It just takes, yeah, he's just like,
I like to use that.
Yeah, that's why he died.
So come on, oh come on, bro, that's different.
That thing's cool.
If you saw that, you'd think you were in hell.
Yes, that looks like Satan.
For real.
Is that a moose horse?
That is crazy hell.
All right, next one.
What is this?
Western black rhinoceros.
Black rhinoceros, that's cool.
Oh yeah.
They got rid of the black ones?
There's only like a few white ones left.
They're probably always getting stopped for no reason.
No, no, they walk slow across the crosswalk.
So go to the...
Next one, what is this?
It looks like a fucking deer.
Sean Burk's deer.
Wow.
It's a deer.
No, it looks a little different than a deer, bro.
I don't like the way you're being.
I don't like the way you're being.
You're being a fucking hater.
You know what you're being?
You're being racist.
You're being animal racist.
Yeah.
These are represented here.
A fucking deer, bro.
No, that looks like a small elk, right?
It looks like an elk, but he's miniature.
Go to the next one.
Baby deer.
That's a fucking lion.
All right, now that looks like a tiger.
That's a standard tiger.
But he's got a low belly, let's agree it's got a low belly.
He's fat.
That was a tiger with a beard.
Yeah, Fu Manchu.
It's an out of shape tiger.
That's a Japanese.
I would not know of a seal from another seal, so that how you're being right now no but it's so when the black
animal comes on no I had I like the black rhinoceros I wish they were still
around just not in my neighbor it's the Caribbean seal like that That's all. All right, cool.
Caribbean seal, I like that.
Caribbean seal.
You know that song?
Yeah.
Yeah.
How do you sing?
Carry me, rich.
Yeah.
And my heart will be like.
All right, I'll be in Toronto.
I'll be in Oxnard.
I'll be in all the other places.
We ate more mince.
Oh, ate more?
Yeah.
Really?
Wow.
Are you sure? Yeah, we had a little break between thes. Oh, ate more? Yeah. Really? Wow.
Are you sure?
Yeah, we had a little break between the ads.
Oh, we did.
You guys remember watching this video last week?
Yeah, I did, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Was that Sturgis?
Plot twist.
Oh, plot twist.
He fucked her.
Oh, he did it.
It looked like he was just completely ignoring her.
Oh, he smashed it.
Oh, well, she won that.
I guess.
Yeah.
What's winning? He looks like he won her. Yeah, he does. Yeah, but when you look smashed it. Oh, well she won that. I guess. What's winning?
He looks like he won her.
Yeah, he does.
Yeah, but when you look at-
I got myself a midget.
Are they brother and sister?
Yeah.
Dude, I saw-
I have a buddy.
I have a buddy.
Stuffed with the Frank Conner these days, man.
That's my guy, too.
He's crazy.
Why?
Just because he's crazy.
Yeah, okay.
I don't follow him at all.
Oh, man.
That's tough.
Yeah, I don't know anything about him, honestly.
He's still gonna fight this year. You think so? Still he's just straight. You know, because he's... I don't follow him at all. Oh man, that's tough. Yeah, I don't know anything about him, honestly.
He's still gonna fight this year.
You think so?
Still gonna fight this year.
He won't.
Proud of where your record's sold.
What?
What?
He's gonna fight this year.
Are you vibing?
When he gets like low talking,
he's like saying things like,
I don't know if I want people to know this.
Yeah, vibe out loud, bro.
I'm saying it.
Vibed out loud, man.
Be proud of your vibes.
I have a buddy.
Proud of my vibes. I have a buddy proud of my buddy
Who I say buddy cuz he's not like a friend and I saw his wife recently and it's him
With a wig on they look exactly the same dude. Yeah, I go like Kristen
I would use it
I get free shit?
Can I get free shit? Dude, they are.
I got and I got it.
We have another buddy who's my friend and his friend.
I'm going to ask him about it because I got to be like, hey, man,
this has got to be the talk of your guys thing.
Like, you got to have a group chat about this, right?
He is her and with a wig on.
I'll get back to you guys next.
Next.
But is he a good looking dude like, you know.
They're fine looking, yeah, yeah.
They're not ugly, yeah.
But it's just.
Well, they can't be that good looking, right?
Well, dude, any, no, any man that looked like also his wife.
Means your wife's ugly.
I would not say she's ugly.
No, you just did.
No, no, no, I wouldn't.
No, he's not going to say that.
No, I'm doing it for you.
On a live podcast.
No, she's, have you seen that viral video?
You know what, it works.. On a live podcast. No, she's a, have you seen that viral? You know what?
It works.
Of, uh, whatever it's like, you know, be nice to your best friend in high school.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It might become your wife.
Oh, yeah.
It's a dude and then a chick.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Well, it's a dude and yeah, trans.
Well, right.
Yeah.
No, I, I, I know that.
I know a fucking, uh, uh, I don't know if you do though.
Oh, wizard didn't come down and just
Make it inside out. Blank. Very godmother. Yeah. Yeah, you know be tonight
Be nice to your homies and
What's he say he's oh this is like some people were commenting on it or something I know this guy be like look check out this fine piece of ass. You never know when that
Person's gonna blossom
into somebody beautiful.
A woman.
Be nice to your bullying middle school
because you never know when they're gonna grow tits.
Yeah.
Have you ever heard of the coffee shop?
Yup.
What is it, not get up and go?
No.
Go get them tiger.
No.
I didn't even. In California?
Yeah, there's one large pot
Yeah, I didn't know there was a that I know where the coffee shop good now
I think that once you once you know you like oh
Yes, pretty good. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I seen that
I know but I didn't know it was a top no, I guess not. Is it like hipster coffee?
Is it good? It's in large might. Yeah. Yes hipster coffee. Look they don't know there's one on Montana Avenue in like, you know, Brentwood
Yeah, yeah, it's hipster.
Whenever it's hipster, it's always sour coffee.
I agree, bro.
Oh, did I order lemonade?
More caffeine.
Hey, bitch.
I agree.
Where's the dark?
It's heavy on the dark.
Dude, it's such a travesty.
Like, dude, like, look look Starbucks sucks and all that shit
but like when you go to like a place that's hip and these guys are in aprons and glasses and pronouns on a
Purple hair and here you go and they give it to you and then you drink it and it's like dude
Is this fucking Castro GT is this guy's hey?
Oh, no, no, no, no, you know what it is though that's on you
that's on you yes that's on you bro cuz you know it was gonna be some bullshit
yet you still went in but I am a connoisseur and I like to try different
coffee places and I also as I mean travel a lot and sometimes you should know
I'm in a place and I see oh this looks like a cool place
Let me try the cold brew and I drink it and I am beside myself
Okay, you shouldn't be though. Do you write a terse letter after that? But sometimes no, I hate
It'll be like this. They're like, okay. Well, here's a whatever thing. This is a
Well, right, you know, you're just like you you're just like okay this place though the boy and the bear is awesome the boy the bear
boy is awesome the cold brew at boy in the bear is awesome if coffee's not in
the name I know fuck yourself boy in a bear coffee okay if coffee is not in the
name you're not a coffee place that's's stupid bro. How about this, you're fucking stupid now from now on.
Laughing
Laughing
Coffee memes in silver lake
It doesn't apply to what you're saying cause they have coffee in the name
It's the most hipster shit.
What is it called? Coffee memes.
Memes? Yeah it's like
They have some of the worst tasting shit.
Really?
It's sour? The smoking tiger is disgusting and sour.
But how's just the first word in the description, I'm out.
You know what I mean?
Smoking?
Korean.
Oh, let me see.
I'm out!
Oh, tonic?
Bro, that's disgusting.
That's just terrible. Yeah, it tastes like vinegar.
But man, I don't even like life.
You judge it off their just drip or their regular roast.
That's what you gotta judge.
The plainer the better, I think.
Yes.
That's what you should judge it off of.
Just off their regular, I just want a cup of jug.
I'm not gonna lie.
I like a little mint.
But that's fine though.
If you find a place that you like, that you wanna try, that's fine.
But I'll check the cold brew or the espresso.
That's what I'm gonna do.
I'm gonna go with the cold brew.
I'm gonna go with the cold brew.
I'm gonna go with the cold brew.
I'm gonna go with the cold brew.
I'm gonna go with the cold brew.
I'm gonna go with the cold brew.
I'm gonna go with the cold brew. I'm gonna go with the cold brew. I'm gonna go with the cold brew. I'm gonna go with the cold brew. I'm gonna go with the cold brew. I like a little mint. But that's fine though. If you find a place that you like, that you want to try,
that's fine.
But I'll check the cold brew or the espresso.
That's it.
Or the regular coffee.
I just go, give me your drip.
Yeah, but a lot of times that's very bad.
So you never put milk in your coffee?
No. Never.
No, that's bitch shit, man.
Well, I wouldn't go that far.
I just don't drink it because I'm the man.
Explain it. I'm the bitch. No, I don't put it because I'm the man. Explain it.
I'm the bitch.
No, I don't put milk in it, but I do think, you know,
I don't care if you put milk in it.
I'm not gonna like.
I'm an oat milk guy.
I don't like regular milk.
Denny, the guy that features for me a lot,
Denny Love, who's great.
He's always like, what do you got?
He'll be like, I'll get the strawberry
fucking sparkly thing and I'm just like, and then. He just asks him for Kool-Aid basically. It's just so, and I'm just like, what do you got? He'll be like, I'll get the strawberry fucking sparkly thing and I'm just like, and then.
You just ask him for Kool-Aid basically.
It's just so, and I'm just like wow.
We should have him on here sometime.
He's great, we should, he would love to.
It's like when people go to Starbucks,
they get the frappuccino, I'm like,
you get a milkshake you fucking idiot.
Bro, I'm with you, I just like, anything that's like.
And there should be two lines.
If you want a frappuccino over that bullshit,
over here, just coffee, over here, I got places to go. And by the way, if I'm getting like, if I'm getting a latte, I never get a large
because it's like, I want coffee.
That's just a big glass of milk.
They're only putting two shots in it.
Yeah.
So if you want the coffee, I'm just saying you get a small that has a little milk in it,
but you get in your coffee.
If I get like a medium size, I'll be like like you can't get a triple shot or a quad shot
When people have a big thing of like like a latte this big yeah, they're usually fat you're drinking milk
You just it's a fucking thing of milk. What are you doing? Yeah? You're a baby now. Yeah, you're just a baby
You can you put a nipple on that?
I don't trust coffee shops with too many choices if If they're good, they got the meat and potatoes.
I guess so.
Espresso, you got your drip.
But that's where they make their money though.
Cold brew, that's it.
But that's where they make their money though.
But that's where they make their money.
No bro, that's it.
There's no money in giving somebody a $3 thing,
just brewed coffee.
Oh, you guys are fucking stupid, huh? No, no.
Because you know the cheapest thing
with the highest profit margin
is their regular cup of coffee.
It costs them six cents out the door.
I guess.
Liquid, cup, everything.
But now they can really up the price.
Sell it for five.
Then why are they selling croissants and shit, man?
Because you're stupid and you buy it.
I don't usually buy them, but I'll be in Oxnard soon.
So, which- Me too.
Oxnard, McAllen, Texas, Beaumont, Texas, Peterborough, Ontario. I'll be in Toronto and Bismarck. Oxnard. so which Oxnard McAllen Texas Beaumont Texas Peterborough Ontario
I'll be in Toronto and Bismarck and Bray I was just in Oxnard I was just in
Oxnard Dallas Cowboys training camp. Come see me I've been on Comedy Central
Oh wow that'd do it. Drive fast all gas. You've seen him on Comedy Central with Chris D'Alea! Fuck yeah! He's always jacking off his forehead.
You know what I mean?
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