The Golden Hour - Nip It in the Bud | The Golden Hour PATREON #24 EXCERPT w/ Brendan Schaub, Erik Griffin & Chris D'Elia
Episode Date: November 1, 2023The guys talk comics that change after they make it big, why Chris only drinks coffee and water, why Brendan doesn't drink water, memories from their childhood that triggers them, foods that trigger... them, all new live call-ins, favorite Drake and J Cole songs, a live call in from a Pan Olympic athlete and much more! Get two extra episodes every month at https://Patreon.com/TheGoldenHourPodcast
Transcript
Discussion (0)
We're friends that laugh, we're friends that shout
Sometimes we don't know what we're talking about
But that won't stop us
Nothing can stop us
It's like a show you used to love
Just rebranded enough
It's stronger, better, bigger power
Cause it is the Golden Hour
It's the Golden Hour
Looked like every country singer.
Oh my God.
Hilarious.
Or like the Backstreet Boys now.
Plain black cap, white shirt.
Wow, both good ones.
You know what I mean?
He looks like they do for the Backstreet Boys.
Those are both good. Fatone?
No, the other one. Both good ones.
Can you hear us? AJ, AJ. Yeah, I can hear you.
I can hear you. What's up, brother?
What's up, guys?
AJ Stapleton. Hey, I'm a huge
fan. Brandon, I've been a fan since
the Fox days. Chris, you were just here
in Detroit. Yeah.
Dude, I went to go
I wanted to go to your show, but
the day before I was going to buy tickets,
my car took a shit and I couldn't afford it.
Oh, I'm sorry, bro.
My girl and I were talking about it for
fucking weeks before you showed up.
I was so fucked up.
Let me do it for you right now. I'll do the show.
Okay, do it.
Do it.
You want to be here for another hour?
I saw your post on Instagram.
You were wearing that Motor City representation shirt.
Don't you have to be like upside down?
Yeah, it's okay, though.
I'll be there again at some point, you know.
Heck, yeah.
Brendan, when are you coming?
To Detroit?
Yeah.
I got to figure out how far is Detroit from Niagara Falls, New York
Is that far?
Yeah, you gotta fly
It's not too, I think it's maybe 4-6 hours
I'm there
First week of November
It's kinda close I guess
Tickets on me if you wanna go
That's 4 hours, that's not too far
I would do the drive
I would do the drive Well I would do the drive.
Well, not with your car though, right?
Tickets on me, big dog.
If you get there, I got you.
I wouldn't see Michael Jackson
in person for four hours, but yeah.
I wouldn't drive four hours to see
Michael Jackson. You would? No.
Like right now, like hey, he's alive
for one day, but you gotta drive four hours?
I wouldn't go. Really? No. Really? I'd be like, he's alive for one day but you gotta drive four hours i wouldn't go really no really i'd be like he he let's go
i'd be like get in the car
you were so stupid
what do you got for us, brother?
Sorry about your car, man.
No, no, no.
No, no.
I don't know about the car.
But no, so my topic was this.
I wanted your guys' opinion on bedroom enhancers, like the Roman swipes or like a numbing cream or whatever.
I had an issue with my girl the other day.
Splurting early.
No, well, that's the thing.
I'm not necessarily a two-pump chump,
but
we were getting hot and heavy.
She took off and went to the bathroom real quick,
so I rocked it down with a rock and a swipe.
And she comes
back into the bedroom and
immediately goes down on me.
Now she can't feel her mouth.
Now her mouth is on fire.
She's like, Immediately goes down. Oh, I'm like that. Now. She can't feel her mouth
She was biting her tongue do anything and yeah, so immediately she's like, what did you just do? I'm like, no nothing nothing She's like well my mouth is numb. Oh no
They go. No, you can't talk. I fuck it harder
Oh no Oh shoot
They go no
You can't talk
Let's figure it out
Can I fuck it harder
I feel like I
I found a cheat code
To sex with that shit
But I mean
I don't know
She feels a different way
About it
I don't get down
With any of that stuff
Dude you put the
What do they call them
Dude wipes or whatever
Yeah dude wipes
Roman swipes
Roman swipes
She comes up
She's like
Oh baby
What the fuck
That's exactly
That's exactly how it happened.
Why didn't you stop her?
Yeah, I know this guy because he's just like, no, no, don't.
Oh, that's awesome.
Why didn't you stop her?
Well, it just happened so quick.
She came back into the bedroom and.
Come on, bro.
The dog, the brown dog.
For a second, I was like...
Can I Steve Harvey this for a second?
Okay, go ahead.
I have to come in and Steve Harvey this for a second.
Wait, real quick, Eric.
Do you use any of those Roman wipes or Rhino 3000 for your wiener?
No.
Not me, bro.
I don't take any of the pills.
I'll do the Roman swipes.
I don't know.
I just...
Well, I've never heard of them.
Not me, bro.
If I'm going to come quick, I come quick, man.
Sorry, sweetheart.
To my wife.
Just like that.
Really loud like that.
What are Roman's swipes?
They numb your dick?
Yeah, bro.
They put them on.
They numb your dick.
Yeah.
Doesn't that make it less enjoyable?
Yes.
No, no.
It's bad.
I mean, it doesn't do it for me.
It makes you go longer, right?
Because you can't feel me.
It gives me that extra like five minutes to where I can have her get hers.
It's too much work.
That extra five is putting in that work, huh?
It says it increases by 340% endurance.
Yeah.
Well, I think.
Steve Harvey.
Can I?
Yeah.
I think that she feels a certain way because it's like an insecurity thing
where you need this stuff
because of her
or whatever
but if it makes her last longer
shouldn't it make her feel good
that she's able to be here
I understand that's how we're thinking about it
but they don't like that stuff
they don't want you to do anything
even if you were using a pill and she didn't know, she would be like,
you need a pill to get hard with me?
It all becomes about their own ego and stuff like that.
She wants you to splurge.
That's a pill to get hard, though.
That's a pill to get hard.
I don't need a pill to get hard.
I just use the Roman swipes to last longer.
No, but they want you to splurge early because it means she's hot.
Right.
A hundred percent, dude.
Yeah.
I am, though.
That's why I'm using the Roman swipes.
I am.
I know.
Just everything you're saying, this dog is perfect.
We have that stupid dog side-eyed next to you,
so it sounds like everything you're saying is a lie no matter what you say. He's going. We have that stupid dog side-eyed next to you,
so it sounds like everything you're saying is a lie no matter what you say.
Oh, my God. He's on.
But we just – I understand.
They like it.
My wife, even though sometimes I'm jazzed up, dude, I'm a sport early.
Jazzed up, you got a bust.
But she likes it because it means I'm attracted to her
yeah
I think you should have
incorporated
I think you should have
incorporated her into
and not do it as a secret
well yeah
but I have
before she's known
I've used her
but that time
I just didn't
got it
well she's probably mad at you
that you let her
put some chemicals
in her mouth
100%
motherfucker
let me tell you something
it's not like she went
she was standing up
and then went she went down quick you It's not like she was standing up and went,
she went down quick.
You know what was happening.
She was probably like, hey.
This guy was like the Austin Powers.
No.
We had a couple drinks
and I wasn't really thinking.
There you go.
I apologize.
Honestly, make it even and eat a dude wipe.
Make it even and you yourself eat a Roman swipe.
Yeah.
Baby, here's how much I love you.
That's what it was right there.
That picture right there, it was her coming to give him a blowjob.
But you guys are all good now or is she still upset?
Oh, yeah.
Everything's solid.
I just, I don't know.
It made me feel some type of way when she was like, ah, what's to do with this?
I bet.
That's one of the funniest scenes in that movie.
Yeah, well, you know what?
That was actually a good call-in, bro.
It was a good call-in.
We like you.
We like you.
We like your energy.
Dude, I've been trying to get on for a while.
I've called in the Lifeline and all that.
Oh, really?
I've been trying to get on for a while.
Oh, my God.
I'm a huge fan of all you guys.
Oh, hell yeah, dude.
We love hearing that, man.
Thank you.
They charge $1,500 on Lifeline to get on.
Eric, Workaholics was
my shit, man. Oh my god.
That was on repeat for a while when that
was going on. I loved it. Yeah, I loved that show.
Loved it, loved it. Thanks for calling, brother.
Good luck, man. Don't put that
stuff on your windows. Yeah, bro, you too, man.
Thank you. Ap you apologize to her
keep it real later brother Thank you.