The Golden Hour - The First 72 | The Golden Hour #84 w/ Brendan Schaub, Erik Griffin & Chris D'Elia
Episode Date: June 14, 2024Erik is back and the guys talk Chris doing shows in Duluth, locations the guys would live outside of California, Cirque du Soleil, Brendan's fear of circus motorcycles, Caitlin Clark haters, friends t...alking behind each others backs, Logan Paul vs Bradley Martyn's underground fight, the legend of Jon Jones, why spelling and math are overrated and much more! Get two extra episodes every month at https://patreon.com/thegoldenhourpodcast Kikoff - Get your first month for a dollar at https://getkikoff.com/GOLDENHOUR today Arena Club - Right now, you can get 10% off your first purchase by going to https://arenaclub.com/goldenhour DraftKings - Download the DraftKings Sportsbook app NOW and use code GOLDEN
Transcript
Discussion (0)
We're friends that laugh, we're friends that shout
Sometimes we don't know what we're talking about
But that won't stop us
Nothing can stop us
Ooh, yeah
It's like a show you used to love
Just rebranded enough
It's stronger, better, bigger power
Cause it is the golden hour
what's up dudes phones phones i know but you know what's cool
shot shot shot shot shot shots no i want to tell you something, dude. Check this out. St. Louis, Memphis, Wichita,
McAllen, Texas, Belmont, Texas,
Peterborough, Ontario,
London, Ontario, Duluth, Minnesota,
Lexington, Kentucky.
You've heard of that?
Crystalia.com.
Greensboro this weekend.
This comes out Thursday, right?
Again, Greensboro?
Yeah.
Don't you go there a lot?
No, no.
I was in Greensboro with Matt Rice.
Oh, yeah. oh yeah preparing for
his thing you know which came out great um but yeah it's now it's just me greensboro just friday
and saturday this weekend but what about tomorrow duluth minnesota you're going or duluth uh i don't
do all that minnesota minnesota you know you've been there uh yep how far away is it from where
you are uh ten minutes no it's like 10 hours.
Oh, it's that far.
10 minutes.
The way he said it.
Duluth.
I know.
I thought he was in the front there.
And then I'm doing a bunch.
I'm actually doing a bunch of places I've never been before.
McAllen, Beaumont.
Fake places.
Well, McAllen's a big, I think, Latino market.
Oh, you'll do great there.
We'll see how we do.
Where were you this weekend?
I was in-
Have you had trouble in Latino markets?
No, no, no.
No, I'm joking.
I was in Des Moines, Iowa.
Not easy to get to.
No, no.
And even worse probably to get to is Green Bay, which is-
Has anyone here ever been to Green Bay?
Me and Nick have.
How come?
I played, I think, Fort Wayne or one of those clubs,
and I drove up there to see Lambeau Field.
Went on a tour.
Did you see the houses?
A lot of Bart Starr jersey.
Did you see the houses outside of there?
Yeah.
They're crazy.
See if you can Google them, the houses outside of the yeah they're crazy crazy it's even google them the houses that
they have like it's so the the properties right outside of the they're like a million 1.1 1.2
yeah but it's right by lambo but but like six blocks away or whatever you know they're ten
dollars yeah they're ten dollars um but some of the houses like know Baltic Avenue on Monopoly That's Green Bay
But it is a weird
Weird place Green Bay
You know what it looks like to me? Happiness
Think how much simpler that is than where we live
Yeah I understand
Have you guys ever lived in a cold place?
No New Jersey but
I mean you know they have
I grew up in the cold
Yeah you did
It's also not that cold there.
Look at the inside of the house.
It's yellow and green.
That's just crazy.
My thing is, if this team gets, if they move, they'll never move.
They'll never move.
Their season tickets are sold out for like seven years.
No, it's the only team that's publicly owned.
Right, true.
The fans on the team.
True, true.
But still, if it ever does end up moving somehow or something happens.
Wild.
They're fucked.
Dude, there's a lot of college towns that are like that too.
I know, I know.
But this is the only thing in Green Bay.
Correct.
No, he's right.
We were there in the off season and nobody was there.
And we went to the hotel, and the guy literally said,
why are you guys here?
Dude, I was there in the off season.
That tour was packed.
Like, we had to reserve it a day ahead.
They didn't do, like, I'm surprised they don't have, like,
concerts and stuff at Lambeau Field.
That's disrespect.
Oh, is it that kind of thing where they're just like, oh, wow.
It's like Notre Dame. That's right. Oh, is it that kind of thing where they're just like, oh, wow. It's like Notre Dame.
That's right.
You can't.
What would it be like for Brett Favre to go back there?
Like it would just be like Brett Favre back in.
Oh.
What he played.
I mean, just suck off central, right?
Yeah, but they're missing teeth, right?
Because Green Bay.
Yeah, dude.
It's not like you're the Dan Marino in Miami.
I didn't see one looker.
No, no, no.
No, no.
Male or female.
No, no, no.
You were looking?
You were like, okay.
It's tough.
Well, at a certain point, you're like, no one?
It's tough.
We call the girls cheese curds.
Oh, God, yeah.
Short, squatty blondes.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Y'all look like Brock Lesnar with wigs out there.
You also have to have some weight on you because it's so cold.
It makes sense, dude.
Arctic winter there.
Yeah, they're like those seals.
Yeah.
You know the winter seals?
They're all chunky.
I think they're called elephant seals.
How much heat do you really get if you're that fat?
It's not worth it.
You'll die.
It's not worth it.
Yeah, the payoff is not right.
Yeah, the payoff is not good.
Dude, can you imagine? There they are. That's everybody worth it. Yeah, the payoff isn't right. Yeah, the payoff is not good. Dude, can you imagine?
There they are.
That's everybody in Wisconsin.
No, look, Wisconsin's awesome.
I just.
Oh, I love that small town vibe, like the stadiums right there.
So you really would like, you wouldn't like to live in Green Bay.
No, I like to podcast like that, but no.
You like to what?
You know, for the podcast, it's interesting, but actually, no.
All right, gotcha.
No.
But I do think it's a fun life.
Easier, simple.
Yeah, if it's all you knew, yeah.
Well, you ever meet people that they've never been to a big city?
Oh, dude.
You meet people like that, and it just blows my mind.
It blows my mind, man.
So jealous.
I have a friend of mine I play video games with, right?
He's never been on a plane.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. You plane. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
He's never left the small town?
Yeah, upstate New York.
That's a different New York.
That's hard to get to, though, man.
That's why.
Even still, he doesn't want to.
There's people that live in L.A. that have never been to the beach.
It's a crazy kind of vibe in people's head that they don't want to.
It's like, okay, I kind of like vibe in people's head that they don't want to you know it's like okay i get it you know we travel a lot so it was like but even like have you ever have you ever been to a place where like there's like animals like just animals yeah right
yeah like that's another thing too like you just like i went to a place there's just horses walking
around yeah that's what i'm saying there's donkeys they're like be careful the donkeys are like what
yeah that's wild now that's crazy to me yeah you go like even when you
go to florida when you're in florida and then they'll have like these weird birds just walking
around parking lots just going ah is that a person and there's like seven ice cream shops like mom
and pop shops and tool shops yes that's when i'm kind of like all right but you know it's great
we're someplace in florida and i brought two black guys almost shut down the fucking city man why because they were just look at him like what the fuck like
they've never seen guys and you weren't in the north of florida no you weren't in jacksonville
no no no no that's always on the first 48 so anyway i it's jack isn't it a home base for
no it's it's jacksville oklahoma city and new orleans that's first 48
you know what's you know jacksonville the first 72 they give you they have an extra day
so dumb the uh you know it's like i don't think cops is on anymore yes i don't think
oh no it's on uh the fox app i don't know if that's still around but the thing about it
is it was weird like if you really think cops, there was a certain point where it was literally all white people on cops.
Right.
Because there's, like, a lot of meth stuff.
When I think of cops, I think of a 40-something-year-old white guy.
Like, I don't know where, you know, I didn't know where it was.
It wasn't mine.
I don't think of.
That was the 90s.
Yeah.
But then on first 48.
Why were they trying?
First 48, it's very rare you see no first
48 i think first 40 i'm like hey do better but do better it's just all black people non-stop
cops i think of is like white redneck dudes getting arrested first 48 i think of it's like
all black people it's only because of where it is it's not like they do first 40 or 48 all over i
think that first 48 is in Baltimore or something.
It's New Orleans, Oklahoma City.
Africa.
And Africa.
Somalia.
They have one in Somalia.
That's your first 48.
I would like to see a first 48 like in other countries.
They can't because it's so crooked.
It'd be sick, though.
They find out who did it, and then they go like this.
Okay, don't do it again.
First 48 unc sick, though. They find out who did it, and then they go like this. Okay, don't do it again. First 48 uncensored, Africa.
Yeah, but cops, it's like, I used to love watching cops.
I didn't used to watch it.
That made me sad even as a kid.
Oh, I like cops.
Bad boys, bad boys.
You remember when Steven Seagal was a cop?
Oh, wait, barely.
Then he got busted because he was in a sex trafficking ring.
They're like, dude, you can't do that.
He's like, why?
You don't remember that?
No.
I always think of Will Sasso as, you know.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
That's just funny.
Yeah, a great Steven Seagal.
Oh, yeah.
So fat.
Steven Seagal, thick.
What else is happening?
Yeah, so anyway, Green Bay is not a –
but I like going to all the different places. I love going to all the different – I love – For two days. It's like happening? Yeah. So anyway, Green Bay is not a – but I like going to all the different places.
I love going to all the different – I love –
For two days.
It's like Vegas.
Yeah.
I don't actually like being in all of the places, but I love that I've been to a bunch of places.
Me too.
I love that.
And also when you travel so much, especially if you're like in Springfield, Missouri, wherever you're at, Kentucky, you realize like, oh, I could probably live anywhere.
Like there's certain parts of the city that are dope.
Like there's always certain parts that are just as dope as certain parts where we live.
Well, like I mean there's like – like if you go to like Raleigh or like – I mean they're like great places.
Well, here's the thing though.
I agree with you.
Like you might go to a place and be like, oh, this is nice.
But sometimes you'll go to a small place, whatever, and you go, this they have this but you realize that's all they have that's right like
like if that's like a mall it's like that's the mall so i mean after six months you're like yeah
okay yeah yeah where's the different you know yeah that's but you just get you like yeah i mean i what
i love about the united states is like you know this is like a very beautiful country and you
wouldn't know because most people don't think to go to vacation in the place that they already live but like if you live
in california and you go to some places in montana is a beautiful state hell yeah you know one of the
only states i've never been to oh really yeah but that's what i'm saying though you go to montana
you see like wow this is actually really great calispell and all these kind of places you know
even some places in idaho and something there's so many different places that you go wow this is really beautiful
but when we think of vacation people think
you gotta go to Mexico, you gotta go to Hawaii
yeah you know but it's like
Hawaii is the only place in the United States where people go
okay I'll vacation
they're really great
places to live
I don't know, you ever think about living
where else would you live?
if you had to live any place else
where else would you live? If you had to live anyplace else, where else would you live?
Everyone always kicks back when I say this, but I love Phoenix.
No, that's a pretty popular place.
Scottsdale.
People are always like, that's too hot.
No way.
You've already said you like to sleep in an oven.
Yeah.
Yeah, I like Scottsdale.
I would do Texas, but I wouldn't do Austin.
I would do like Fort Worth or Dallas.
I love Texas, man.
I like Texas.
Certain parts of Texas.
Houston is cool except for it's...
Houston traffic.
Oh, got it.
Worse traffic than here.
All over Texas.
Yeah, but it's humid.
Yeah, because Houston, people don't realize,
it's right on the beach there, right in the ocean.
So it's humid.
You know where I could live?
You know where I could live?
Where?
Straight up.
Nigeria? oh so I could live you know where I could live you know where I could live where straight up Nigeria
Victoria
BC
like
like
there's a
Canada
yeah
dude it's
awesome
look up Victoria
like
look at
look at that
look at that dude
oh it looks like
it's fucking Europe
no it does
but it's
it's just
it's just
it's just awesome.
I don't know why they keep showing that one building.
That's like the parliament or whatever the fuck they call it.
I would like to live in it.
But it's so awesome.
Toronto's pretty lit, too.
Toronto's great, yeah.
But that's a metropolitan city.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
This is a little bit more of a-
Why go there and give the government 60% of your money?
Facts.
And you're under the dictatorship of, what are the hell's names?
Here we go, guys.
It's just really nice, dude.
I like the Pacific Northwest.
Like, you know, like not Seattle.
Like Portland?
Outside of Seattle.
Not Portland.
Not Portland, but Seattle over Portland.
But outside.
Like in Oregon?
Outside of Oregon?
Like where the Goonies was filmed and that kind of stuff?
I can't fucks with that.
The only problem is there's not much sun there.
I know, but.
You don't like sun? It's not that I don't like it, it is so beautiful it's so green and lush and you know certain times of the year yeah uh we're i would live in other parts parts
of california though really like you lived yeah dude not me and i'll tell you why because the
the taxes suck and like you can find if where? Like, you're talking about where?
Carlsbad's cool.
Oceanside's cool.
Yeah, Oceanside's cool. Some parts of Northern Cali are really dope.
See, when you go to Northern Cali,
I'm like, just live in a different state.
I totally agree.
Yeah, and you can get that from other places.
Yeah.
Like, if you're going to go to Northern Cali
and you're going to be that far away from L.A.,
let's say you need to come back and forth to L.A.,
then just go over, like, 100 miles.
Yeah, totally. You know what I'm forth to LA, then just go over like 100 miles. Yeah, totally.
You know what I'm saying?
Go to Nevada. I could do Carlsbad,
Oceanside. Certain parts of
OC is dope.
Bro, I love OC.
Especially for families. Orange County is great. Good baseball too.
And it is just
a great place.
A lot of Asians.
And whites. Whites and Asians.
And it's red down and Asians. Yep.
And it's red down there, too.
I know.
I know.
I'm going to Cirque du Soleil in Laguna Hills on Thursday.
Laguna Hills is dope.
What are they calling that now?
This one is Cusa.
Cusa.
All right.
But they have a bunch of different shows, I guess.
It's all the same.
I don't care what. No, I know.
If we had two ropes hanging down right here and chin was just like, it would
be Golden Hour, Cirque du Soleil.
It's just chin spinning right here.
That's what they do.
I know.
Like, no matter what the thing is, it's all the same.
I know.
But I like to know what they're called now.
Dude, you know how many times I've been to Cirque du Soleil?
Five. Really? Yeah. With the kiddos? many times I've been to Circus LA? Five.
Really?
Yeah.
With the kiddos?
Or you and your wife?
Just him on his own.
He's in Vegas.
He just gets one ticket.
That's weird.
I went by myself.
No, I went with, I don't know.
I think it was Kristen.
It was a while ago.
And then I went as a kid a bunch.
And then I went.
Was it around when you were a kid?
Yeah, yeah.
It was?
Yeah.
I mean, you know.
I thought it was like a new thing.
When I was like... The clown with the big ball, that one's been around the longest. Yeah.
New-ish, but no, it's been around
for 30 years. Oh, wow.
Yeah. When you go to Cirque du Soleil,
you leave there going, oh, man, I don't
work out enough. Oh, bro.
Those guys are tiny, though, yeah?
It's still unbelievable. That doesn't count, though.
They're tiny. It's still unbelievable, but it count though they're tiny it's still unbelievable
but it's but but but it but they're so small but but when you look at Cirque du Soleil this is what
I do oh that's amazing that's amazing and I leave and I go like this who cares same you know what
I mean like they work really hard yeah no you get have you taken the kiddos to the like circus
like straight up like no carnival because there's one it's off de soto
here i took the kiddos it was so fucking stressful i'm talking old school like all right everybody
like old school you got a host they brought out a fucking thing it's a family it's like a whole
circus family they brought out a steel cage round cage one more help someone in there no one
motorcycle shut up dude one motorcycle gets in there he's, one motorcycle. Shut up. Dude, one motorcycle. Gets in there.
He's going up and down.
They'll bring in another one.
I'm like, they're going to put two in there?
It's not big, dude.
Yeah.
Two.
Going right, Sean.
I'm like, oh, this is crazy.
My palms are sweating.
My kids are loving it.
Third one comes like, this is too much.
You're having truck flashbacks.
Fourth one comes.
Dude, fourth one comes.
I hope they have OnStar.
Mr. Shaw, are you okay? Are you okay? Dude, fourth one comes I hope they have OnStar Mr. Shaw Are you okay?
Are you okay?
Dude
Fourth one comes
And then they bring out
Some hot girl
One of the like daughters
And she stands in the middle
Oh god
It's so nerve wracking
Yeah that's scary
You know what it is though
If you think
This is what happens man
You take a thing
Cause this is what's
Like basically
You think it's Cirque du Soleil
Somebody can like
Swing on something
And they go
Ah
Right
And then they go Well what, what if we added –
If you add like 10 things, you don't give a hug about it.
Yeah.
They put it together in a thing.
But I want to see the – go back to the –
So 39 years.
So since 1984.
Wow.
But here's the thing.
And I can't believe I never really put this together.
Of course, if I guessed, I probably would have guessed this.
But there isn't more of a thing that would come out of Montreal than this.
It's unbelievable how fucking Montreal this whole thing is.
And out of that, I know that.
I fucking don't like it.
It's French.
Because it's so obviously Montreal, and it's like, what the fuck are they doing?
Get off that fucking big circle.
You know what I mean?
But also, are people in Cirque du Soleil,
are they just failed Olympic gymnasts?
Like they didn't make the team and they're like, all right.
But that's the thing, though.
Put some paint on.
Yeah, but you can only do the Olympics once every four years, man.
So you got to do something else to pay the bills.
That's what I'm saying.
That's probably where they go.
That's where gymnasts go to die.
Or just to contort
yeah have fun and when do you ever get to do that i'd rather watch that every night than wmba
um right no i yeah probably more athletic yeah i'd rather watch i don't care about any of it
honestly stick a little break man because when it comes time to buy a home hey both you're looking
both you're looking i am uh or car i'm always looking for
cars or find a new apartment a bad credit score can be a big roadblock thank god for kickoff they
found a way to beat the system with fast easy way to build credit safely each month sign up for a
monthly plan in minutes and start building credit right away as far as for as low as five bucks
without the right boost credit building takes time, takes forever.
Kickoff, jumpstart, your credit, so you get to your goals quicker.
Yeah, when your credit is kind of like janky and you need to get it up.
You can't do anything.
If you have bad credit, you literally can't buy anything.
But you know what's great about this?
Not just for people that have bad credit,
but maybe you're at like 710 and you're trying to get up to 780.
for people that have bad credit, but maybe you're at like 710 and you're trying to get up to
780.
You're trying to get across the finish
line from like 780 to 800.
This is the place to go.
That's why Kickoff helps you out, man. You sign up
in minutes from your phone and start building credit
right away. Use AutoPay to
build credit while you sleep and never worry about missing
a freaking payment. No credit check?
Cancel anytime. Kickoff is the
number one credit building app right now.
It has over 100,000 positive reviews
on the App Store and 98%
are five stars. Wow. Join
over 1 million people building
credit with Kickoff Credit Account today.
Get your first month for a dollar
at getkickoff.com
slash golden hour today.
That's kickoff without
the C. Alright? That's kickoff without the C. All right.
That's get kickoff.
K-I-K-O-F-F dot com slash golden hour.
Special offer applies to new kickoff premium customers
for the first month only.
Subject to approval and only available
at get kickoff dot com slash golden hour.
Terms of offer are subject to change.
They love showing these new highlights now on
instagram i'm catching these highlights of the game and i honestly the only one that like even
remotely looks like caitlyn clark it's caitlyn clark just the way she plays like she she really
is trying to mimic uh steph curry yes which tells me that steph curry plays like a girl
oh that's your takeaway yeah because you don't ever see some girl like, ooh, she looks like LeBron.
Right.
Never.
Or that girl looks like Jordan.
She plays like Dennis Rodman.
Never.
Yeah, no, you never.
Like all these other girls are like, you know, it's like, Leia.
Because he is busting that ass from downtown.
So that's what she's doing.
But she looks dope doing it.
So I get why people like watching her play.
She's balling too.
She's just like, she'll dribble, dribble, step back, three, like, wait, five feet away
from the thing, and I'm like, damn, this girl can ball.
Dude, I-
Like, by the way, all the racial shit, like, shut the fuck up.
That's what I'm saying.
Dude, I love that-
That girl can ball.
I love that they finally got one, it's getting attention, and they're just hating on her.
It's just awoking the-
It's just this shit.
They finally got one, and they're like no she's white
get out of here
alright fuck it
we tried
also dude
women hate each other
and so it's just
yeah that's what it is
they don't
they tear each other down
that's what I'm saying
yeah yeah yeah
like yeah
I was about to say
but female comics
are so supportive
they're saying nothing
about politics
there's nothing about
none of this stuff
they're best friends
for two years
and then hate each other
they call each other wifey
and then they want to
stab each other
so it's but it's just
like fucking you know it's facts though dude it's, but it's just like fucking, you know.
It's facts though, dude.
It's so facts.
Oh my God, this is my friend.
I would die without them.
And then they go and they fucking talk shit behind them back.
And it's just like, you know what I mean?
Women, women, yeah.
Does your wife have friends?
You know what?
Does your wife have friends?
Very good friends.
But here's the deal.
I said this to my wife.
I was like, why do women hate each other?
And she said, I thought she was going to be like, don't say that.
She literally said, I don't know how I lucked out.
I have the best friends.
And we're the only people that love each other.
She thinks so.
Until I mic her friends up.
Except for it's been 15 years.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
I mean, who knows?
No, we know.
Rachel.
No, they don't have friends mostly.
I don't think she likes her friends.
Mostly women don't have friends.
No, but it's like every time she hangs out with them, she's like, I don't want to be her friends with her anymore.
Well, that's, yeah, that's not good, right?
No, but listen.
Every time.
No, I know.
That's not good.
That's not good.
I always say, hey, give me an update on your friends.
I try to, you know, what's going on with them?
Then it'll just be like, ah.
It's always something like, oh, well, yeah, I don't even know.
I'm not even going to say their names.
You know what I mean?
Of course.
Because she'll be like, you know.
But she does have, like, she has, like, friends that have,
three of her friends have the same name.
So we have to, like, come up with, like.
Karen or some shit.
Yeah.
We have, like, different names. But or some shit yeah we have like different names
but my wife's like she has friends from like she's like oh we met when you know in sophomore
year we both had the same backpack been best friends ever since i'm like that's wild
yeah and they'll do all she's like oh she's you know whatever she got a new job we're going to
celebrate i'm like fuck thanks girls Thanks. Girls are just different.
Yeah.
Like, if you called me, you're like, can I get this TV show?
I would not.
Oh, yeah.
Is this a Drake lyric?
Yeah.
And it's summed up like.
I got bitches asking me about the code for the Wi-Fi.
So they can talk about their timeline and show me pictures of their friends.
Just tell me they ain't really friends.
Yeah.
Oh, my God.
That's what.
Hold on a second.
Thank God.
If Drake sounded like that,
he would be working in Quebec someplace.
He'd be doing gymnastics.
Yeah.
They don't have friends.
But also it's like comics too.
I don't know if male or female,
but also females,
that's what they do.
They do love them,
but they gossip.
They just gossip. Well, comics are crazy. Chick the chickens be chicken they be glucking yeah yeah yeah yeah
um what if you could if you could hear everything anybody's ever said about no
behind you back uh to some like anything another comic has told another comic about you would you
hear it oh no i wouldn't know what's the benefit but there's no benefit online don't don't do it yeah but that yeah it's like looking at reading
comments online non-stop and then you know creating your happiness off that but also it
might be somewhere me and chris or me and eric disagreed on something and he's at the store
tonight he's like fucking shot man blah blah blah but don't hate. And you don't mean it. You're just in. It could be contacts or. Did you fucking tell him?
Piece of shit.
Piece of shit.
Don't sleep, bro.
Real friend.
No, but you know, it is what it is.
You know what it is.
You know, I tell you, you know what?
I know when shit happens.
I know.
I know what you two motherfuckers talking shit about me.
You know how I know?
You'd be surprised.
No, no.
It's on the show when you're not here.
Yeah.
No, I like my fat fingers. So I hate? You'd be surprised. No, no. It's on the show when you're not here. Yeah, yeah, no.
I have fat fingers, so I hate this fucking typing shit.
Yeah, you're really bad at texting.
Yeah, but I know y'all talked about it.
Oh, well that's- We tell you about it.
I know, but what I'm saying though is like,
he said something to me one time that I was like,
oh, that's probably something Chris and Yai have said.
No, we never talked about your texting.
Together, being him?
Yeah.
No, never.
No. No. No your texting. No. Together being him? Yeah. No, never. You did? No. No.
No.
Never.
No.
You know why, though?
No.
Because I would, if something popped in my head where I wanted to make fun of you or
I was mad at you for texting or whatever.
You put it in the group chat.
I couldn't wait to tell you.
Yeah.
Especially if it's funny.
But I'm just saying this.
I know what you're saying.
It's like, you know, you don't, I don know, I don't think – to answer Nick's question is I don't necessarily want to hear that because if you hear it, then you're going to attach some negativity to it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But it's okay that people talk about you.
Yeah, there's no context.
I'm just saying I think it's okay if people have some – like I wouldn't want to hear what like married couples are saying about other married couples.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh, that's fun to get. That's true, yeah. I love doing that yeah that's fun that's true yeah oh me too we left your birthday party like can you
believe that's the best yeah it's the best yeah the best person if you want to
get if any reason is to get married is to be able to talk mad shit about funny
stays there I can even believe this right, can you even believe this? Right, right. That's why you go to like, you know.
Oh, and.
But the difference is.
By the way, happy, your wedding anniversary is coming up.
Yeah, yours was, right?
On the 9th.
That's gay.
Yeah, mine's coming up.
So, got to do something.
Yeah, happy.
But that's the beauty of it.
You know, you're just.
Yeah.
Even at your own wedding, you're just up there.
When you're at the table at your wedding and you're sitting there and all the people are there.
You're just you and your wife going like this. Look at table six. That's why. Can you're at the table at your wedding and you're sitting there and all the people are there,
it's just you and your wife going like this,
look at table six.
That's right.
Can you believe Jenny came?
Look at table six.
Oh, fuck it.
Who the fuck did that?
Is that his new wife?
Yeah.
She's fucking whore.
They actually came.
They actually came.
That's the beauty of marriage.
She brought a plus one.
Who the fuck is that?
Greg brought another whore.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Look at this whore. Hi. I give her two weeks. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Look at this whore.
Hi.
I give it two weeks.
Oh, my God.
You look great.
But the difference is, bitches, girls that talk all that shit.
Let's reign it back, dude.
Girls that talk all that shit.
Difference is, like, we might joke about it, but if you call me at 3 a.m., you need something on there.
That's the difference.
Oh.
Who?
What are you saying?
Like, when it's, like, real friends. You real friends you know i'm saying like we might joke around what
there might be some shit you know but like if you call me yeah i'm there dude yeah you know
that's the difference between real friend like there's like me and calvin we're talking like
there's 3 a.m friends that if shit hits the fan you can call and they'll be like whatever dog i'm
there and there's something like ah dude i got this you know you can't you you don't even they
wouldn't be a thought to call.
You just know they're unreliable.
But we know.
We already know.
You know.
You get to know who you're.
Yeah.
It's like, who of your friends could be an emergency contact?
Right.
Like, in this room.
There's maybe four.
In this room, like, I don't know if Nick would be my emergency contact.
I got you.
Nick's pretty loyal. I was about to say. Nick would be, I don't know if Nick would be my emergency contact. I got you. Nick's pretty loyal.
I was about to say, Nick would be, I don't know about.
No, Casey Loyal is a motherfucker.
Because I was changing out a hood on Sunday.
And that's when you realize, I don't have many friends, man.
Because I was changing out a hood.
You have to have someone hold the hood while you put it on.
I was like, who the fuck can I call?
My wife was like, I asked her, I'm like, can you just hold hold the hood to like hold the baby in just one arm she's like no she fucking
calls i'm like who i have no friends brian lives fucking in newport or where the fuck he's at
nor would he come or he come three hours late i need it done now so i called casey case like
say less showed up wow yeah well it also doesn't count because... It's on the payroll. He works for you.
He works for you.
Why wouldn't it fire him over that?
But what I'm saying is, if you weren't working, he may never talk to you again.
That's also fair.
He's going to be like this.
What the fuck is Sean talking about?
That's what he did anyway.
Yeah.
He went like this.
Hey, bud.
No, he's like, yeah, up b b hangs up his girl's like god i'll be fucking bad this fucking idiot i mean i think that i think we
all you know who your emergency contact friends are i mean i think that's you know i just i just
think i don't think women like i know my wife she don't even she would
there isn't one of her friends and she would be like i'm calling her in an emergency your girl
needs new friends yeah that's it that's the takeaway they still hang out though that's what
i'm trying to say yeah she has no one else to hang out i don't believe it no it's just always
someone new now now she's running like she's going on walks right she'll be like i met this girl off
instagram no but she'll meet like she goes to manhattan Beach a lot. So she likes this little area of Manhattan Beach.
And so she met a girl at a baby store who has a baby.
The girl gave us a baby thing.
That's cool.
Now she's like, I'm going to go hang out with so-and-so.
And I'm like, all right.
Good.
I keep telling her, good.
Get her to your village.
Yeah, yeah.
Hell yeah.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, but you also meet, like, obviously we met through comedy and stuff.
But you also meet friends.
Obviously, everyone meets their friends from work, too.
Because you're doing the same thing can relate like like most of my friends now outside comics
are like dads on the baseball team like those are my i talk to them more than most people
i get it i think where she was like it's a lot of her single model friends yeah you know are like
now aging out of that and it's like you know she now she has a baby and like, you know what I mean?
Right.
Bro, my girl was at the mall.
Baby in one hand.
Yeah.
Four-year-old here.
Tiger walking there.
He's big as fuck, right?
On his own.
She's walking.
She says, I won't say the name.
This NBA player comes up to her.
He's like, damn, girl, you the nanny?
She was like, excuse me?
He's like, you the nanny?
She's like, no, I'm their mom.
He's like, damn, for reals? Are you with the dad? And she's like, damn, girl, you the nanny? And she was like, excuse me? He's like, you the nanny? She's like, no, I'm their mom. He's like, damn, for reals?
Are you with the dad?
And she's like, yeah.
And Tiger's like, yeah, my dad's at work.
I'm like, way to go, Tiger.
And he's like, damn, I don't care.
He said that?
He said that.
And then what?
Leave them kids at Shakey's and let's go.
Yeah.
And then what?
Oh, and then she was like, have a good day.
He's like, let me hold the door.
And Tiger was like, I got it.
An NBA player?
Yeah.
Then Tiger called him the other day.
Was it Dan Marley?
What?
Was it Dan Marley?
It was Rex Chapman.
No, it's not Rex.
I love Rex.
No, it was a black dude.
Yeah, giant black guy.
Rex Chapman sucks.
Yeah.
What'd you say?
Rex Chapman sucks.
He's got like a big Twitter and he's just-
He's like woke now.
Yeah.
Super woke.
Yeah, it sucks. I like Rex too a big Twitter. He's like woke now. Yeah. Super woke. Yeah, it sucks.
I like Rex too.
Was it Sam Cassell?
Why are you just picking random names that you heard before?
I like it.
That you heard before.
No, I'll do this.
I'll do this.
Is it Lamar Odom?
Was it Penny Hardaway?
Sam Cassell is old as fuck too now.
If it was Sam Cassell, my son would have been like, alien!
And run away.
I think that's like- Sam Cassell, dude. I think that's like
I think that
Professional athletes
Professional athletes
Are so competitive
That that's what he saw
It was competition
Oh but I'll beat the fuck out of you
Right
I'll tie your giant dick in a knot
Well oh dude
I would've loved
You know what it's like
I would've loved
I would've loved that
Dick bar
He's all Ow ow ow ow, ow, ow, ow.
I'm like, just lose the erection.
It'll go away.
What are you doing?
Is it a shake weight?
Dick bar.
I'll make you squirt, bro.
You'll be gay.
Yeah, I just, that's.
That's what you would do.
Let's say you catch your wife cheating on you with a big black eye.
And that's how you get back at him.
You just jump in bed, push your wife off.
I'm going to jerk you off.
I'll just jerk off.
Oh, you like fucking, huh?
You're going to fucking finish.
You're going to finish.
You like fucking, huh?
Let's see how much you like fucking.
You ride him.
Give this a go.
Oh, you gay now.
It's like a dad making his son smoke the whole bag.
What a torture.
Yeah, the whole bag.
That'd be such a torture.
Nah, open your eyes, bro.
Nah, nah, you're going to enjoy this.
You know how hard it is to open somebody's eyes when they don't want to?
You're like, mm-mm, mm-mm.
You're going to take all this, dick.
That just was a challenge.
He was just trying to be like, hey.
Yeah, but that's the odd one.
Let me see my dick.
My girl was like, I still got it.
I'm like, no shit.
Well, it's cool.
That's what she got out of that? Yeah, no, but it's cool Let me see my game. My girl was like, I still got it. I'm like, no shit. Well, it's cool that... That's what she got out of that?
Yeah, no, but it's cool to have that too, but that's...
But Tiger couldn't wait to snitch on her.
He was like, because we pulled up at the same time because I was getting home from work
yesterday doing the pods, and he's like, mom, mom, let me out of here.
Let me out of here.
She's like, no, just wait.
We're pulling.
She's like, no, let me out of here.
Really?
He jumps out.
He's like, dad.
I was like, good job.
Did he recognize the basketball player? No. Yeah. Same to self. Well, he's going to let me out of here. Really? He jumps out. He's like, Dad. I was like, good job. Did he recognize the basketball player?
No.
Yeah.
Sam Cazale.
Well, he can't.
No, no, no.
Brendan's going to be in front of the computer with the NBA sign up with all the pictures.
Was it him?
No?
Okay.
Was it him?
No?
What about this guy?
No?
All right.
What about him?
No?
He's like, Dad, they're all black.
I don't care.
I can't even.
Dad, they all look exactly the same.
Why do you keep showing me the same picture?
It was Harold Minor.
It was Harold Minor, wasn't it?
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
What a pull.
Harold Minor?
No, I like this.
Baby Jordan?
Was it Isaiah Ryder?
No, what if it was Scott Stiles?
Like just fucking.
Scott Stiles?
Steve Kerr?
Oh, wow.
I haven't thought of him in a while. He's a coach forr? Oh, wow. Haven't thought of him in a while.
He's a coach for the Warriors.
Well, I haven't thought of him in a while.
Well, that's, well, you know.
Ron Harper.
Well, now you know.
You can't have.
Oh, me.
Tiger can't be around.
Oh, but also, me and.
She watched it.
Dude, me and black NBA players have the same type?
No shit.
Yeah, of course they do.
Yeah.
Yeah, of course you do.
Yeah.
That's, wow, interesting. I can't wait to hear who it is off of the podcast. Oh, you guys. I sent Nick this. You you do. Yeah. That's wow. Interesting.
I can't wait to hear who it is off of the podcast.
Oh, you guys, I sent Nick this.
You got to see this.
Oh, I saw this.
This is crazy.
But it made me think of something.
Okay.
The one dude gets it so bad.
Boom.
Right here.
When he gets up, he's like, I got it.
Boom.
Now let me handle your friend.
Okay.
Here's my question.
Seven.
So you're always telling us all the people you could beat up.
Mm-hmm.
So I want to know.
That guy, that big guy.
The two midgets?
No, no, no, I'm saying no.
So you beat up two people.
So could you take me and Chris?
Yes.
Just so fast?
He could, he could, he could, he could.
He could.
Give us a second.
He could, and it's like largely due to you.
But it's like, wow.
I would save him for last.
I'd hope he gassed out.
Wow, fuck both of you guys.
No, we're game playing here, dude.
No, you can fucking murder us.
I'd go for you first.
Really?
Yeah, yeah.
I'm kidding.
I'm kidding.
No, yeah.
I'd go for him first.
Yeah, hoping you gas out.
And don't hit me from behind.
Well, because I'd probably be like this. Come on, yeah. You'd go for him first? Yeah, hoping you'd gas out and don't hit me from behind. Well, because I'd probably be like this.
Come on, Chris!
And that's how you get gassed up.
I know.
I'm like, Chris!
Wait, it's not fair.
You fought me after I was cheering.
Oh, you guys suck.
Dude, hold on.
This is crazy, though.
This was...
Oh.
How is this okay?
Because this is another country.
They're trans.
Right, right, right. This is another country because they're trans right right right this is another country they're trans i thought i was once doing a podcast and the guy was talking shit about
jujitsu yeah i heard about and it was seven of them in the room i said i bet you i could tap
out everyone in here under a minute the guy was like not a chance dude i'm okay and he's like
you'll do it i'm like yeah as long as you guys don't sue me he's like all right someone put a
minute on i'm like dude i'm telling you you're gonna get fucked up he's like everyone cool with it and they're like yeah
okay so what happened 53 seconds seven guys that's like fucking all right okay what's the
denzel washington movie the equalizer oh he goes now how about this so you've already stayed the
best was the last dude like the the sound engineer like, uh-uh-uh. Ow! His neck was all fucked up.
You've already said you could beat up Mike Tyson.
Yeah.
But could you beat up Mike Tyson and Jake Paul at the same time?
That'd be tough.
No.
Two guys that can fight.
Well, also.
And Jake can wrestle some.
Because also you have to worry about, because they can throw punches,
so you have to worry about while you're on one.
That's what I'm saying.
If I'm going on one, it'd be tough.
If I'm on top of Jake and Mike just comes from behind and free cold cocks me.
Because if it was us, okay, and you were dealing with one of us,
and you got hit in the head from behind, it wouldn't matter.
No.
Because we don't do that.
Because we don't do that.
And then you would have to do something.
That could be a problem.
I'd be like, Chris, come on!
If you, like, kick me in the face.
Yeah.
I think we could take him.
No.
Like, pro cop kick me in the face?
No, no, no.
We cannot take him.
Dude, especially you guys.
Let's take a break because this one's special, man.
Eric, probably you.
You didn't really collect cards.
Who, me?
Yeah.
Oh, you're out of your mind, bro.
Am I off on this one?
I still have them.
Oh, damn.
Me too, bro.
Got a bunch of junior sales worth nothing. Listen, everyone remembers that of your mind, bro. Am I off on this one? I still have them. Oh, damn. Me too, bro. Got a bunch of junior sales worth nothing.
Listen, everyone remembers that special card as a kid.
Ken Griffey Jr.
Upper deck, 19.
Oh, daddy.
Remember that rookie card?
I loved that card.
Mine was a Christian.
I bought one pack.
I got Christian Laettner and Shaquille O'Neal in the same pack, rookie cards.
My brother got nothing, and he was crying.
I went, oh, I'm a good brother.
I'm a good little brother.
Here's Shaquille O'Neal. I'll keep theian latener jokes on you whoops whoops i wish i could
get that collecting's come a long way since then but now there's a new way to buy sell trade and
rip packs it's called arena club arena club has taken repacks to another level introducing slab
packs from arena club.com the only repack that provides real value, a
complete view of all possible cards,
and clear hit rates
for each one. Yeah, I love
Arena Club. I'm trying to get that Otani
rookie hitter. It's not cheap, but listen,
there's a lot of transparency,
and it's so freaking easy. You can trade,
you can buy, you can sell it, alright?
So whether you're buying, selling, trading, or displaying,
Arena Club is an all-in-one trading card platform you've got to check out.
Buying?
No more shipping delays or cards lost in transit.
All right?
Grading?
Cool.
The Arena Club grading process combines AI and human grading.
All right?
Trading?
Say less.
Make offers, send trades, and interact.
Create your own personal showroom.
Flex on your buddies.
Start building your collection today. You should say
that every also, it's all
guaranteed, the authentic.
That's right, dude. And right now you get 10% off your
first purchase by going to arenaclub.com
slash golden hour.
That's arenaclub.com slash golden
hour for 10% off your first purchase.
Hey, you know Bradley Martin.
You know Bradley Martin and Logan Paul fought over
the weekend. Oh, what did they do?
They boxed?
No.
But they didn't do it on the-
Street fight.
Straight up street fight.
And everyone's like, oh, bullshit.
There's no marks.
I'm telling y'all.
Whatever.
They fought.
Straight up street fight.
Why?
Because Bradley was talking shit.
And then Logan on the pod was like, man, you're just doing this for clout.
Use my name.
And Bradley was like, no, dude, I'll fight you in front of the gym.
No cameras, nothing.
And Logan was like, no, dude, I'll fight you. I'm in front of the gym. No cameras, nothing. And Logan was like, cool.
What happened?
And then called him and was like, dude, I'll see you Saturday morning at 11 a.m.
Like, shut your gym down.
And he rolled up at 11 a.m.
And they fought.
Okay.
And what happened?
I saw the aftermath.
They were both like, all right, bro.
I'll tell you off air.
Because, again, I told them I wouldn't say what happened.
I'll tell you off air.
But they straight up fought.
People were like, there's no marks.
No one got KO'd.
It was literally 30 seconds.
Well, yeah, because real fights don't really last.
The average street fight lasts 15 seconds.
If that.
Okay, how about this?
I'm not done.
Me, Chris, and let's add Casey.
It doesn't matter.
Casey's scrappy.
Casey's scrappy.
But if it's three people.
I don't know, man. Probably okay well you would just take him out first right you just get casey just
that first one that takes a fucking right hand you guys like oh my god and then yeah
no but this is yes but fights don't last long no it's a street a street fight. So Bradley called me on Friday because it's going down.
Can you help me?
So I went over to his house.
He lives close to me.
I went over there.
I was like, he was talking about this, this.
I'm like, no, no, no, no, no.
This fight's going to last like 15 seconds.
Right.
Don't worry about any of that stuff.
Oh, she talked to him beforehand.
Yeah, helped him out.
Okay, so, and.
As much as I could.
This guy fought?
This guy right here?
No, that's the UFC champ, Sugar Sean. Okay, yeah. All right. Well, so, and... As much as I could. This guy? What? This guy right here? No, that's the UFC champ, Sugar Sean.
Okay, yeah.
All right.
Well, so, wow.
Weird.
Pretty gangster, though.
Were they angry with each other?
No.
But I thought they were talking shit.
They were, but then that's the thing.
It's like, once you fight...
No, they were talking shit, but once you fight, it's like respect.
You're like, all right, all good.
You showed up.
Yeah, but the chicken was called.
They were playing... It's clout chicken. They went too far. Yes. You're like, all right, all good. You showed up. Yeah, but the chicken was called. They were playing.
It's clout chicken.
They went too far.
Yes.
You know, that's all that was.
It was like, man, I'll fuck you up.
Right, right, right, right.
There's always that one guy that's like, all right.
Right, right, right, right.
Which is rare, especially what Prime's worth damn near a billion dollars.
I was like, fuck me up.
Like me and Rogan were talking about it.
Rogan's like, that is wild.
Logan agreed to do this.
Isn't he worth like a billion dollars?
He's just in a street fight. I'm like like that's the respect i have for the dude like yeah
also to bradley's point like tough task and also even though he's bigger but logan was i think a
state champ in in high school in ohio which is fucking good wrestling he did has a lot more
training he still jumped in the ring with floydweather. Like the dude has experience in that field.
And does Bradley at all do anything?
No.
He's just a big fucking dude and strong.
Right.
But –
Yeah.
All right.
Well, you'll tell us off air.
Yeah, I'll tell you off air.
Yeah.
People are like, there's no marks.
I don't know if Bradley's been on camera.
You know, he has a shiner.
Yeah.
Could Chris take Nick and Chin? If I have to fight two people, I don't want to fight two been on camera, but he has a shiner. Yeah. Could Chris take Nick and Chin?
If I have to fight two people, I don't want to fight two people.
Chin's scrappy.
Nick watches way too much UFC.
Some technique.
I wonder how it would come out in a fight.
I have watched quite a bit.
It'll help.
Whatever it is, I've watched a lot of porn.
It doesn't mean I fuck like it.
I disagree
there's some stuff
both of them are over quick
you haven't picked up
some things
that you use
yeah yeah yeah
you're not watching
a couple
he'd write
he'd fuck it up
he'd be like
yeah all over my face
wait
the guy
the guy
the guy
but
whatever
the fight with
Nick would be like for sure he would at But whatever the fight with Nick would be,
for sure he would at least bet on it.
So that would be great beforehand.
How'd I beat you so fast?
He was like, I don't know.
The Pete Rose of street fighting.
Is anything sacred to you, Nick?
You bet on everything.
I think it's pretty gangster.
Two dudes, both have a lot to lose, have businesses.
We're like, yeah, let's fight.
I mean, I would never.
And Logan showed up, had his mouthpiece from the Floyd fight,
and was like, I brought my mouthpiece, and brought Brad a mouthpiece.
It was like, you want a mouthpiece just so we don't fuck our teeth up?
And Logan was down doing the street, and Brad was like, no,
I don't want to fuck up my knees and sprain.
He's like, I shut down the gym. It's at least padded. And Logan was like, all street, and Brad was like, no, I don't want to, like, fuck up my knees. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
He's like, I shut down the gym.
Like, it's at least padded.
And Logan was like, all right, cool, man.
Oh, fuck.
What if one of them died?
What if that's how one of them died, dude?
I mean, they signed waivers.
They did?
Yep.
That's why Logan's like, I'm down to do it, but you got to sign this waiver.
Okay, now I'm over it.
No, I mean, it's better to do it like that than it is to fucking.
Logan has too much to lose. Yeah, yeah. Don't even fight. Yeah, I agree over it. No. I mean, it's better to do it like that than it is to fucking- Logan has too much to lose.
Yeah, yeah.
Don't even fight.
Yeah, I agree with that.
I'm going to fuck you up.
No, no, no.
But first, get my paralegal in here.
I'm going to fuck you up.
Sign this.
Do you have a pen?
Give me the thing.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
What are we talking about?
Nah, that's smart.
So much a sanctioned fight.
No, it's smart.
Like, I'm down. If you's smart. Like, I'm down.
If you want to do this, I'm down.
But I have so much to lose.
Like, sign this so you can't sue me for all my fucking money.
Please, Grey Coffin.
Please sign this for all the money.
Sign this so you don't come for my fucking businesses.
Sue each other afterwards.
Yeah, also, did they sign saying they wouldn't tell what happened?
That was the rule. Like, you can't film the film the whole fight no i know they can't film it but and i think
mike his co-host was there to film the end where they're hugging yeah i saw that that's what i saw
let me tell you something they filmed it and then later they're gonna it's gonna get released here's
the unreleased footage i'm surprised they didn't film it because they could have sold it for a lot
of money huh yeah but i think that was part of the thing like all right if one of us gets fucked up money they got money no i i know because it's like a mono
e-mono man thing i think more guys should do it there'd be less bitches out there well that's
the internet talking all this shit yeah yeah yeah yeah do something no i get that i i'm of the
belief that like if you're on the internet it should be your name period agree yeah you've said
that before and that's a good that's good yeah it should be your name and also keep that same
energy when you see that person in public oh bro i see people and they're just hey and i'm like
they think you don't know i've been in rooms where i'm like yeah it's like hey
who did you think i was? Yeah. Yep. I'm only me. Yep.
Your next special title.
I'm only me.
Yeah.
It's crazy.
It's crazy,
dude.
It's crazy.
You just can't go around fighting people.
Why not?
But why?
I'm not going to kill him.
Yeah.
You talk all that shit.
I know.
I mean, I just get to get punched in the face,
but you don't talk that shit. No, no. So the internet made so many people need to get punched in the fucking
face yeah it's crazy and they just don't de stefano has a funny bit about it where he's like
i can't remember what it is but it's about that it's about him so it's about like none of people
get punched in the face anymore because when you used to be out at a bar and if you if you say one
of your tweets out of the bar you just get knocked out yep you know it's something like that it's really funny oh yeah well that's that's actually that'd be a great
experiment oh yeah dude it would kind of be like uh that scene in die hard where bruce willis had
the the poster on the black neighborhood it'd be just like that yeah you take one of these trolls
yeah put them in a you know that's hilarious put the tweet on the thing you put all the tweets
you know
they have to read their tweets
you know
well this is what I said
I mean it is what it is
it's a weird
it's a weird
well I don't
look dude
it's a weird world
I don't
it just encourages
I'm not a fighter
I'm a call to cops person
I have something to lose
oh interesting
I got a family
yeah man
fuck all y'all
oh I get it
come at me with some shit
I'm like oh you gonna hit me
oh okay cool yeah please hit me hit me right now right now good hi i just got hit uh come down
to uh real karen yeah that's cool karen fuck them fuck them they're gonna do that shit yeah
hey man not all of us are you it's easy for you to say this because you just
admitted to the world you could beat up seven people you would you ask me
no i know but i didn't i didn't
come in there like i'll beat up everybody no no no but but yeah but it's different when you have
the tools and you know when you have a particular set of skills yeah but you when you don't you're
gonna find them and i'm not saying i'm gonna call the cops guy i have no fucking idea but like
but if somebody does something fucked up to you,
yeah,
you,
you should call the cops.
I'm talking about,
it's like,
especially if it's something unprovoked.
If you're in a situation like,
like I said,
like that time I was at the comic store and the guy tagged me,
I went at it.
Right.
I'm not talking,
I'm not saying like,
but I'm saying you could be in a situation where somebody is like trying to like beat,
like for no reason,
like try to like provoke you into some sort of thing.
I'm like,
yo, I don't care about you enough. i know right right so like you know what i mean
that's the thing okay what if you're fired uh what if what if someone hit your wife let's say
you're that's a completely different no no no no no hold on hold on let's say you're walking at the
outdoor mall you're you're with your wife and some dude's like what's up bitch slaps the shit
out of your wife you're like sir
cops
that's not the same thing
that's not the same thing
that's not the same thing
at all
you can still get sued
it's almost insulting
it's not the same thing
no no no
in that situation
if somebody comes at you
and attacks you
attacks your family
unprovoked
I'm going to go at them
of course
and I'm going to call the cops
I'm just going to go like this, guys.
Yeah.
And you call the cops.
Baby, he's hitting you.
What did you do?
What did you do?
What did you say to him?
No, I'm saying like, yeah.
I'm talking about like.
I didn't know.
I didn't know if you were like, no, never put your hands on somebody.
No, no, no.
That's not what I'm saying at all.
What I'm saying is like, that's not.
I'm saying like, there's so many people.
If you're out at some place, man, and people are acting up,
and they're clearly trying to provoke you into a fight.
No, that's different.
That's what I'm talking about.
When people are trying to provoke you into a fight for whatever reason,
you're like, no, I'm not.
No, that's different.
I don't know you.
Same, same.
I don't know.
And if you're that kind of loser,
that's the more reason why you need to let people know.
You know that this is not going to end the way you want it to end it just doesn't make me mad when somebody i don't know that's
exactly yeah i'm just like what are you doing what are you doing it doesn't make i'm the same
way i'm like what are you doing bro this don't even make sense right now this is what you're
gonna this is weird though now that you have a kid think about that that's what i'm saying
you have so much more to lose i'm not talking about if somebody does some out-of-pocket shit. No, I know. I know. I know. Dude, I was at the mall off Topanga, and this dude was literally having a meltdown because
his car, so he valeted.
It was like some Persian dude.
The worst attitude I've ever seen.
It was insane.
He was yelling at everyone, talking shit, saying racist shit to this black dude.
I'm like, what the fuck?
I'm just me and Bosty because we just saw the new Godzillazilla and we're sitting there and he's like scared he grabs on my leg
and the guy's like just get my fucking car boat and the guy's like dude hold on we're gonna get
it he's like i'll fucking get it and then he drives the car like at me and bosty and then
and by he's like dad what are we gonna do and i went buddy if that guy gets closer yeah you're
gonna grab that tree and you're going to watch what your dad does.
That's how this goes.
I will.
And I told boss,
I went,
you don't need to be scared.
Unless he has a gun,
you're going to hug this tree
and then watch me go to work.
Right, right, right.
If he has a gun,
you're going to be like this.
No.
But it's like,
but you know what?
But my kid was like,
hell yeah.
You don't know what other people are going through.
No, I know.
That's true.
That's extreme.
But yeah.
I agree.
Like on the road, like someone that gets all mad.
I'm like, yeah, I'm having a rough day.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
To a certain extent.
Yeah, well, no, that's extreme.
Because eventually it's like, all right, you keep going, dog.
Yeah.
Not everybody, again, not everybody in a certain situation has the ability to handle that situation.
Because it's never going to go.
There's no winner in a fight.
Well, I mean.
If you have the ability to just end a fight in three seconds, then that's not even a fight.
Right, right, right.
You know?
Right.
But I'm saying once a couple of punches and stuff gets thrown, in the end you're looking at two people who are like somebody's fingers broken.
The other guy's, you know.
So worth it.
Were you like that as a kid, though?
I fought a lot as a kid, yeah.
My brother and stuff like that, yeah.
When you're an only child, you're just fighting with imaginary people.
You know what I mean?
I'll fuck you up, pillow.
I just think we've gone away from like that. Like if two dudes fight, like it's all good. fighting with imaginary people you know what i mean i'll fuck you up hello i just say i just
think we've gone away from like that like like if two dudes fight like it's all good like no one
needs to call the cops it's over yeah i'm saying like they did it like the logan paul yeah i'm
just saying in general society like oh it's so caveman and call the cops be safe it's like or
you you have an issue you have an issue okay just fucking fight let me know how it goes and then get
all your energy out.
No one really gets hurt.
But that's only in a situation where two people have.
In a specific instance.
And they both feel justified.
Right, right, right, right, right, right.
Even if they don't.
Nah, dude, that's crazy.
Fucking go at it.
I'm with you.
Instead of getting on lines, talking about it, fucking fight.
Well, that's, yeah.
Well, that's a whole other thing.
But that's what we're saying.
But that's what bitches do.
That's what I'm talking about.
They get on there like, oh, this guy cut me off.
You believe this?
Oh, dude, he's so lucky he didn't get out of the car?
Okay.
Well, no, that is so.
When I read shit like that, I'm just like, oh, my God.
Yeah, right now people got guns and shit.
Yeah, that's the problem.
Insane.
Anyway, we're talking about this too long.
I'll fuck you up, Chris DeLeon.
Let's take a little break, guys,
because the Celtics are being the crap out of the Dallas Mavericks.
Doesn't look good for them.
Not good.
Celtics are pretty freaking good.
All right?
So we're close to crowning an NBA champ,
and you can get in on the action and make money with the Celtics,
to be honest.
DraftKings Sportsbook, an official sports betting partner of the NBA.
With same-game parlays, live betting, odds boost, and so much more,
don't miss out on the NBA postseason winding on down.
If you're new to DraftKings, cool.
You've got to check this out.
New customers bet $5 to get $150 in bonus bets instantly.
Download the DraftKings Sportsbook app right now.
Use the code GOLDEN.
That's code GOLDEN for new customers to get $150 in bonus bets
when you bet just $5.
Only on DraftKings. The crown is yours.
Download the DraftKings Sportsbook app now and use code GOLDEN.
That's code GOLDEN for new customers to get $150 in bonus bets when you bet just $5.
Only on DraftKings. The crown is yours.
Gambling problem? Call 1-800-GAMBLER.
Or in West Virginia, visit www.1800gambler.net.
In New York, call 877-8-HOPE-NY
or text HOPE-NY.
That's 467369.
In Connecticut, help is available for
problem gambling. Call 888-789-7777
or visit
ccpg.org. Please play
responsibly on behalf of Boot
Hill Casino and Resort in Kansas.
21 plus age varies by jurisdiction.
Void in Ontario. Bonus bets expire
168 hours after issuance.
See dkng.co
slash bball for eligibility and deposit
restrictions, terms, and responsible gaming
resources. My son
was putting him to bed last
night and
he's like, says
he's scared, but I don't
he's not, though.
He can do it.
And I'm like, buddy, I think he just doesn't want to go to bed.
Yeah, he's an excuse.
Oh, but see, that's manipulative.
Right, right, right.
That's some smart shit.
He is a little scared.
That's smart.
That's kids in general, though.
Once he starts to see, like, ooh, I got this guy wrapped around my finger.
Last night, he probably came out of bed like three times and the last one was he's like running out of
stuff i was like buddy you're you're fine you're going to bed you know he was scared of a movie he
saw a little earlier i get it i was like that's not real i had to explain to him that you know
at four they don't know i'm like it's a cartoon it's not real and he was like no it was in a movie
and i was like nobody that doesn't exist
that's not real this and that so he's like oh okay and i was like um don't you know that you
can tell me anything like and everything is okay i'm your dad and he said no i don't really know
about that this is like shit like that he's like i don't really know about that just delaying just
delaying nobody but it's funny and then uh we'll watch this. But then I went downstairs and I was watching TV.
And he came down and he was like, Dad.
And I was like, yeah, buddy.
And he says, what does enjoy mean?
And I was like, what does enjoy mean?
He's like, yeah, it's like when you like something.
And he says, so enjoy food.
And I said, yeah, enjoy sleeping.
And he goes, and he goes in bed.
It was really cute.
But this was, this was, it's amazing how, yeah, make it so it makes sound.
But it's up on the upper right.
But it's amazing how this will just make your heart swell.
And it's just, it's just what it is hey
guys
well I like to get hot chocolate with you because I know you like it I like to
make you happy
Where you at?
What's that gay pride flag in the back?
Yeah, I see some.
Yeah.
And then there's my dates.
Dude.
Which is the real part.
He's like,
right now he's in his head like this.
Okay, come on,
conference finished.
We gotta get to the dates.
We live in Hollywood, bro.
That's why there are gay pride flags.
Fair point.
You know?
And end.
You know what?
I'm going to go put a flag on his house.
And you talked during me talking, and you didn't succumb to the video.
I love the video.
No, no, no.
You went right to the gay shit.
The flag threw me off.
I'll be honest. But just say that after. after no i couldn't i i was like this it's a story it's gonna be eight seconds i
was like this oh like what are you doing you know what and i'm gonna be honest with you i'm gonna be
totally totally honest with you guys once i saw that video clicked up ready to go you knew i knew
you were gonna say
something about the fucking pride flag and i was like i just hope he waits till after and i'm not
lying you know i'm not and and and it happened and i don't know if you're like yo we went to
parade you want to go to parade of course we didn't go to a fucking pride parade dude i don't
want to go to any parade i wouldn't go go to the Tupac Shakur parade.
That would be a crazy parade.
There's a dear mama float.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, people are like, oh, you don't like parades, gay parades?
I'm like, no, no, no parade.
No parades in general.
I don't like the Macy parade.
I don't like the Disney parades.
Yeah.
No, I would never go to a parade. Never.
Ever go to a parade.
Unless.
What?
It was about him.
Calvin says, I want to go to a parade.
Oh, I would go then.
I would go.
Oh, no, I lie.
Nah, dude.
There's like guns and stuff there.
Guns.
Yeah, they shoot people.
Yeah, it was.
God, it's awesome.
It's weird, though, how moments like that, just like regular moments,
like if you didn't have a kid and you just went to go to a coffee room,
but you just go to a coffee room just by yourself.
Sociopath.
It would be a nothing experience.
But if you bring your kids, like, dude, I was sitting there and I was like,
I don't know if I'll ever forget this.
Yeah, so much fun.
Isn't that, just because he's there
um yeah it's it's it's so fun and he just kept saying like i like how it's hot yeah like he
didn't understand because it was a drink you know the best it just but yeah like uh i'll lie to my
kids all the time like with uh they want to go to shake shack like after the baseball games all the
kids want shake shack and. And we're around,
yeah, they love Shake Shack
because they have the shakes
and all that shit, whatever.
Yeah, it is pretty good.
But they always want to go
and the parents want to go somewhere else
and the parents are around,
you know me, I have no filter.
I went, oh, Shake Shack's closed.
It's 5 p.m.
I go, Shake Shack's closed.
And Tiger goes, no, it's not.
Yeah, it was a Wednesday.
I go, no, it's closed.
And he goes, why?
I go, it's gay pride month.
And one of the moms went, what's wrong with you?
I went, what?
It comes up.
They don't know what that is.
That's hilarious.
The first thing that hit me, she went.
You couldn't say remodeling?
And she said what?
She was like, come on, man.
I'm like, I don't know.
It's the first thing that pops up.
That's so stupid.
That's so funny.
I don't know.
They're like, god damn it, man.
That's funny, man.
I like doing this thing, like Rachel you know, Rachel's breastfeeding.
It's like late at night, so you're supposed to go to sleep.
And she saw a video where you're like, you're not supposed to play with them and laugh and stuff because they need to go to bed.
Oh, God.
You know what I mean?
So, like, I'm looking over, you know, and he's just like this.
And he grabs me and gets off of me.
And he's like, ah.
And I'm like, stop it.
No laughing right now.
And he's just like, you know, he's just like laughing and having fun.
And I'm just like, she's like, okay, take him.
Take him.
Take him.
Fine.
Anything else, Nicholas?
Yep.
By the time this comes out, I wonder if the news of Connor not fighting drops.
Oh, is that it didn't come out yet?
There's the news.
What was it going to be?
Word on the street Is he's not fighting
Who
Connor
I don't have any like
Confirmation
He was gonna fight with who again
Michael Chandler
Who's waited two years
Oh right right right
The word is
The fight's off
I'd assume by the time
This comes out
Thursday it's off
He's a movie star
Why would you wanna fight
He's gonna be off
No
Well they
He got
He pulled out of a press conference
And some rumblings And then I guaranteed It was gonna to be off. No. Well, he pulled out of a press conference and some rumblings,
and then I guaranteed it was going to happen.
I was dead wrong.
Dude, maybe he just was like one day woke up and was like,
what am I doing?
Yeah, but except for when you fight and that's what you do, it's like.
I know, but once you start doing.
Other things.
I think that once he was in that movie.
I guess, yeah.
Now he could be like a Bond villain or something now.
He was pretty good in that as being that character.
So what I'm saying is once that half starts to happen, it's like when What's-Her-Face went to the WWE.
Rhonda?
Yeah, she was like, why am I getting my ass?
She hated it.
I get it.
I see what you're saying, though.
Except for if you did a bunch of movies and all of a sudden were making millions and millions of dollars in movies,
wouldn't you still do stand-up?
I mean, I would.
I don't think that's the same.
No? I think if every time you had to do stand-up before you went on stage,
someone got to punch you in the stomach.
Oh, I see.
I see.
I mean, it would be different.
But also, think about the training camp, too.
You see Dustin Poirier's fucking, like, he loves fighting, bro.
It's just like.
I know, but that's like he's not doing, like,
he's not doing the next level of echelon shit.
To Eric's point, like, if you went up to Dustin, like, here's 100 mil.
He's like, fuck this.
I'm not getting punched in the face.
When I got a kid, Connor legit has hundreds of millions of dollars.
Yeah, true, true.
Sold his whiskey,
sold all the shit he does.
I saw that, what's his name,
Dana White video about,
what's the guy he was talking about,
John Jones?
Is that the guy's name?
Yeah.
He's never lost?
Never.
Wow.
He got DQ'd in a Matt Hamill fight.
That was the main event,
not a big deal.
But he got DQ'd in a Matt Hamill fight.
He got DQ'd from 12 to 6 elbows
which were illegal.
He got DQ'd
for beating the shit
out of him
but he's never lost a fight.
Wow, Jesus.
Yeah, I didn't know that.
So you think
he's the greatest fighter ever?
Yeah, people say
he's the greatest fighter.
Yeah, hands down.
Wow, that's crazy.
This was it.
This was scary
when the guy was like,
I'll kill you.
What?
When him and DC were talking
he didn't know they were still on. What? When him and DC were talking. Yeah, he was like, yo, dude, you don't know I'll.
He didn't know they were still on camera.
Oh, I didn't see this.
And DC and him were just like talking.
They're in two separate rooms.
And DC goes, when I see I'm going to spin your face,
and John doesn't think that the camera's still rolling,
he goes, you see the look in his eye?
He goes, if you spin my face, I will kill you.
I will fucking kill you.
And you're like, oh my god.
But why can't we see it?
It was just up, right?
Let me next door so I can spit in your fucking face.
You know I would absolutely kill you if you ever did something like that, right?
You could never kill me.
Oh, I bet you I could.
Then you should try, John.
You really should try, John.
I would literally kill you if you spit in my face.
Yeah.
He beat the shit out of me.
Oh, he did?
Yes.
What's the other guy's name?
Darren Cormier.
But he was the world champion for a while.
He was world champion when John was doing his thing.
Wow.
But he was world champion at light heavyweight and heavyweight.
He's one of the greatest of all time, and John beat him twice.
Wow.
Yeah.
I mean, that's got to be like, what is it to be in the mind of john jones
well think about being john jones you're literally the baddest man on the world that's what he's
saying at all times like you're not waking up i know but did he like did he did it translate
into other things did he like what's he doing now like you know he's still fighting he's still
fighting but he has some demons like he's like he's a wild boy to wake up and be like i hope people test me today you know what i mean
like dude you so that must be a great feeling though that must be like the greatest i don't
know what that feeling is to just be like no one does only he does yeah like people like oh mike
tyson or insert whoever is about francis john literally the bass on the plane imagine being john imagine being john
he lives in albuquerque yeah you've been to albuquerque it's wild albuquerque's wild
remember they're like rioting and shit he's like oh oh something to do he drove down to the city
where all the riots were and jumped out of the car was like don't touch this fucking building
anybody touched bill i'm gonna fuck you up and they, let's move on. Oh, wow. Chris isn't welcome in Albuquerque.
No.
Yeah.
I had a whole thing about it.
What's this?
I went there recently, though.
A parent lying to their kid.
Kid figuring it out.
Open.
You say what?
Chuck E. Cheese is open.
I pressed the slow second right here.
Oh, my God.
Is Chuck E. Cheese opened?
Chuck E. Cheese is open today from 11 a.m. to 9 p.m.
Here are the hours for the rest of the week.
Look at the kid's face.
That's hilarious.
Say that to me, Nick.
That's fucking great.
Yeah, I sent it to the crew.
Dude, I got to go to the bathroom and I have a phone call.
Are we good?
Yeah, I think we're good. You got, I got to go to the bathroom and I have a phone call. Are we good?
Yeah, I think we're good.
You got to take a shit, huh?
Oh, yeah.
I feel like you hold your shit so well. Always after.
No, it's the coffee.
Always after golden hour, I always have to go.
You guys make me shit.
Thanks, dude.
While you are kind of talking shit and taking a shit, that's full of shit too.
You know what I mean?
True.
I am full of shit, especially on this podcast.
Hi, guys.
I got a debate club for y'all um what do you think is the dumbest spelled word ever colonel or receipt what'd you say the dumbest spelled word you said colonel receipt
you know colonel c-o-l-o-n-e-c-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L-O-N-G-H-L- and Pisces on my phone. Why the fuck would you ever... But those are different words. Why would you say Pisces?
Yeah.
Because I'm a Pisces.
Oh.
So you saying that a lot?
Maybe.
I can.
I'm a Pisces.
Yeah.
What do you guys want for dinner?
I'm a Pisces.
How many chicken pieces do you want?
I'm a Pisces.
How many Pisces of chicken do you want?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I don't, yeah, I did it the other day to one of them,
and it was, yeah, I did it the other day to a word
that I should have known how to spell,
and people were around, and I was like,
ah, fuck it, and I did it anyway,
and nobody heard, but I was like,
if they hear it, they're going to make fun of me.
Some stupid word.
Car.
Because you're going like,
because you're doing like this, yeah diapers yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah or does
is it dose yeah there's a lot of those i just you know i uh spelling is just now one of those
talents that who cares well no you i agree i agree no dude they're
coming out with a thing on on uh at the eye you know that now that apple is pairing up with is
a jet cheap open ai um there's like a notepad where you can just go three plus four and others
go seven it's like you you write it yeah i know it's like you don't even have to it's not good
elon musk put out a thing saying like yeah i know he was like if this if they do this
iphones will be banned and i wonder why i wonder why he said it's a security well he's all like
yeah because now you could now the iphone could do anything right i understand like you know
now do you know they have the whole thing but you know you can like set your phone to record
like list like you just put your phone down and it'll be- Recorded.
Now?
Yeah.
So they have so much stuff.
Man.
This is one example of why he's afraid.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
No group has flaws besides-
Yeah, ChatGPT.
Oh, right, right, right.
Whoever put it in was super woke.
Yeah, that's stupid.
This is weird, bro.
So if on ChatGPT, you're like,
it won't bring up white people. If you're like, bring up Abe Lincoln. Oh, yeah, yeah. This is weird, bro. So if on GPT, you're like, it won't bring up white people.
If you're like, bring up Abe Lincoln.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
It's like a Native American Abe Lincoln.
Did they do the white one?
Yeah.
This is five things white people need to improve.
Oh, wow.
See, this is fucked up.
That's fucked up.
And five things black people need to improve.
He says, no, I cannot provide a list of things.
It's so stupid.
We know there's a lot of stuff black people can improve.
Asians, come on.
Stop making the food so spicy.
Yeah, it's dumb.
All this is dumb.
But you know what, man?
There's a pendulum swing that's happening right now with all this kind of stuff.
Well.
Everything.
I agree.
Even with like, did you see that whole thing about the medical – we'll talk about it next week.
But the medical community is coming out now about the whole trans stuff.
Like they're actually being like, hey, this is not good for kids.
All that kind of stuff.
Not only doing with that, but also COVID.
Where they're like, you kind of fucked up.
Yeah, you guys were right.
And I'm like this.
No, but look, dude.
I thought I was vibing no no if you if you got it still the shot yeah it was and like because they
they were using fear mongering forced you yeah yeah and they forced you especially where we live
yeah how about in the military no i know and so you got the shot and now it's like people are
still getting it like as it goes.
And I'm like, I'm not doing that.
I'm not doing that.
I shouldn't have got it.
I got it.
Fine.
But I'm not doing it anymore.
It's okay to realize you made a fucking mistake.
But it's weird to stand by this fucking ideology that just was made up.
Yeah, but it's become a left and right thing.
It's just a health thing.
It's not that I'm far right. It's just a health thing
at this point. And it's just like...
Alright, cool. I'm out.
See you guys. It's wild when you
see people still wearing masks.
It's so wild.
I'll go.
Masks are
crazy, right?
Live and ass piece of shit.
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
What's good?
I'm Brian Greenberg.
I'm Victor Rasuk.
Check out our new podcast, We Almost Made It.
You guys might remember us from HBO's How to Make It in America.
And guess what?
We're going to have actors, athletes, fashion designers, comedians, friends.
We're going to talk hustle, grind, anyone who had a dream and people thought they were crazy but they chased it anyway.
We want to talk about it. We also want to hear from you. So go follow, rate, and who had a dream and people thought they were crazy, but they chased it anyway. We want to talk about it.
We also want to hear from you.
So go follow, rate, and review
We Almost Made It at Apple Podcasts, Spotify,
or wherever you get your podcasts.
Go ahead and do it.
Do it.
Do it now.
It's summertime, and with Pluto TV's Summer of Cinema,
the streaming is easy.
Stream hundreds of free movies
on all your favorite devices all summer long.
Chill out poolside with Mission Impossible and Transformers.
Or stay cool inside watching Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark, Titanic,
or The Wolf of Wall Street.
No matter your vibe, download the Pluto TV app to spend summer doing what you love, watching
endless movies.
Tell me that's not the deal of the summer.
Summer of Cinema on Pluto TV.
Stream now, pay never. Thank you.