The Golden Hour - The Turtle Is Mine Now | The Golden Hour PATREON #18 EXCERPT w/ Brendan Schaub, Erik Griffin & Chris D'Elia
Episode Date: July 26, 2023The guys talk about Chris' weight gain, their workout routines, Jiu Jitsu, best friend fight advice, proposal advice, an update on the Island Boys, the TikTok robot trend, how much their wives changed... them, Nick almost getting into a fight with his neighbor over a dog and much more! Get the full episode plus two extra episodes every month at https://patreon.com/thegoldenhourpodcast
Transcript
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We're friends that laugh, we're friends that shout
Sometimes we don't know what we're talking about
But that won't stop us
Nothing can stop us
It's like a show you used to love
Just rebranded enough
It's stronger, better, bigger power
Cause it is the Golden Hour
It's the Golden Hour
This shit is real, huh?
Hell yeah, those overalls are dope.
Really real.
I appreciate that.
You're looking good, bro.
You could be in Eric's family.
Uh, I don't know. You're Eric's dad. Hold on, hold on, could be in Eric's family. I don't know.
You're Eric's dad.
Hold on, hold on, hold on.
What do you mean you don't know?
Hold on a second.
I don't know.
What's going on, brother?
I watch that Twitch, man.
It's brilliant sometimes.
You say you watch the Twitch.
He watches on Twitch.
He watches Eric Griffin Gaming.
Hell yeah.
Where are you calling from, big dog?
Sitting at work right now, heading home on this train.
Oh, cool.
Oh, dope, man.
What's going on, brother?
What do you got for us?
Well, first things first, I'd like to say,
now I know why you guys want to fire Nick.
I've been trying to get on this damn Zoom meeting
for about a month and a half now.
But now,
I had a situation.
I just kind of want to get you guys' idea
of what you guys would do in that situation,
and then I'll tell you what happened.
Okay.
A year ago,
a year ago,
my wife found a turtle,
a tortoise.
This is hilarious already.
Okay.
We're rolling,
like just cruising our neighborhood.
Okay. So we picked it up, and we put it in, like, just cruising our neighborhood. Okay.
So we picked it up, and we put it in the backyard.
My wife wants to keep it.
And I go, we can keep it as long as nobody comes looking for it. Right.
Well, obviously, we'll get it back to them.
So I look on websites, like the local, like, you know, animal shelters,
the Facebook tortoise ones, just to see if anything's missing.
Nothing's missing. Nothing's missing.
No, nothing.
A year later,
it leaves my yard because
my gardener left the gate open.
Okay.
A dude down the street comes and says,
hey, that's my tortoise. No.
After a year?
Exactly. After a year? Exactly.
After a year.
Now that's my tortoise.
I think I'm going to give it back to him.
And I was like, no, we're not.
Oh, you love this.
He has pictures.
And he has all this shit.
And I'm like, I'm like, it's up to you.
You want to give it back to him or not?
Well, so hold on.
So you're like, you're into this tortoise now.
That's his boy.
Yeah, we named him.
Sheldon.
Sheldon's a homie.
That's hilarious. Sheldon's part of the family.
Where was the guy, if you're so concerned about the turtle,
where were the wanted signs and the missing turtle signs?
Wanted?
He did nothing.
He did nothing.
Then all of a sudden he's walking down the street.
Yeah, and whatever is, or call, whatever, gets out of the backyard.
Now he's like, oh, that's my turtle.
Nah, bitch, that's my turtle.
But you can have it on Sundays.
So hold on a second.
So do you have kids?
Yeah, I got three kids.
That adds a little bit of a dilemma because the kids love the tortoise, right?
No, I'd be like Debo.
It's my turtle now, homie.
That is a great question, don't give it a great
question does the guy have kids not i've never seen any kids he's new to the neighborhood and
i've never seen i'll tell you what if the guy's got no kids then that turtle's yours that that's
what makes it for me i agree if some if some three-year-olds like i miss my turtle then you
might have to think about it.
Then you share it on the weekends.
Share it maybe.
It is a fucking turtle.
It's not a dog.
If it was a dog, you'd –
Oh, man.
You've never had a turtle before, dude.
Even if it's a dog, though, your kids start loving the dog.
This is – I can't believe it's been a year, bro.
Well, that's what it is.
And they live – how close does he live to you?
So he is
across the street, like four houses down.
Oh man, this guy didn't.
He should have put up some signs or something.
That's what I'm saying. No effort. Wanted.
Missing turtles.
But I want to know how big was your effort
to like, you know,
to like let people know, hey, we found a turtle.
That's a good point.
Like, what did you – you searched the internet,
but you didn't put up any signs or nothing either, right?
I mean, he's not up to – he's not obligated.
I know that.
I'm just – yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'm just saying, how quickly did – so what actually happened?
What a good question. ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത്ത� Thank you.