The Golden Hour - They Didn’t Do It, Did They? | The Golden Hour #65 w/ Brendan Schaub, Erik Griffin & Chris D'Elia
Episode Date: February 2, 2024The guys get a live call-in from Brendan Dassey's brother, Chris reveals he's never sent a dong pic to anyone other than Bryan Callen and the guys talk Erik's baby being born any minute now, favorite ...Arnold Schwarzenegger movies, M Night Shyamalan movies, Mark Normand's viral video at a comedy show, they do a cursive writing challenge and much more! Get two extra episodes every month at https://patreon.com/thegoldenhourpodcast
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We're friends that laugh, we're friends that shout
Sometimes we don't know what we're talking about
But that won't stop us
Nothing can stop us
It's like a show you used to love
Just rebranded enough
It's stronger, better, bigger power
Cause it is the Golden Hour
It's the Golden Hour
Saw that picture you sent Callan, dude.
Naked.
Yeah.
Why didn't I get it?
Rock on.
That's what hurt my feelings.
You get different stuff.
Yeah, you get other stuff.
You get some stuff.
I still see it.
You don't think Callan sends me those? That's nice. my feelings. You get different stuff. Yeah, you get other stuff. You get some stuff. I still see it. You don't think Callan sends me those?
That's nice.
I like it.
Yeah, I'll send it to both of you.
I saw Pat on me.
He's in shape.
Callan's like, what's my problem?
Yeah, he's a hater, huh?
Yeah, he's a hater.
I said, he looks ridiculous.
This is a message to everyone out there to know that if you send a nude picture to someone,
they're going to show it to their friends.
Well, yeah. No matter what it is. I assume i i go like this i go like this well no when i send a nude picture
to callan i think okay this is not going to just be seen by him is that okay and i send it or i
don't you have to yeah rock on bro i'll send it to you bro you'll get it feelings you didn't send
me that yeah i should have actually at least put the group chat. Now that I'm thinking about it, I should have sent it to you.
Yeah, I would have liked it.
If that picture gets out, I don't care, though.
I don't care.
Oh, this is him thinking he looks good in the picture.
No, no, no. It's not a bad picture.
Well, it's not a bad picture, but also...
I don't care about that shit.
Do you know, I've straight up...
This is the craziest... This is the truth.
I have never
sent a nude pic only
to Brian Cowan.
Only to men. I've only sent nude pics
to men. Only. I've never
sent a dick pic. I've never sent one.
Only to Brian. Because you know why?
You feel safe with Brian. Yeah, he's safe.
He's harmless. There's a website.
Chris is... Yeah, well, hey. If I know
who leaked it... It's Callan.
Callan needs the money.
Yeah, exactly.
Callan needs the money.
You know exactly who it is.
Yeah, but I've...
I mean, maybe to Chris and I've sent like some...
But not like a sexy one, you know?
No, like goofing around.
Yeah.
But yeah, I don't...
I've never sent a nude, ever.
The baby's coming, okay?
That's the thing.
Because like we're already at 40 weeks.
Yeah, I know.
That's crazy.
And we had this ultrasound and that French lady.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
She was like, I didn't expect to see you again.
Then she's looking at the baby.
She's like, oof, the turkey's done.
Nine pounds.
Are you kidding me?
That's what I'm saying.
Wow.
That's crazy.
And then she said, the baby has a little head, chubby with long legs. That's good. I was like, I don't know. That's good. That's what I'm saying. Wow. That's good. And then she said, she was like, the baby has a little head, chubby with long legs.
That's good.
I was like, I don't know.
That's good.
That's all right.
We're having an ostrich.
That's all right.
Hey, dude.
I'm laughing back here from the peanut gallery.
This guy looks like if you two had a baby.
Dude, yeah, he really does, huh?
Right?
Yeah.
There's a guy over there that looks like.
He's from Detroit?
If you two had a baby. It's like your face.
More him.
It's your hair.
And your build?
You're not sick like me?
Do you have something to tell us?
Yeah.
Who would have had him?
You.
No, you, dude.
My reply was, no, you, dude.
Like if that technology was available,
which one of you would be carrying the child to term?
Like that movie Junior?
Wasn't that movie Junior?
Yeah, Arnold got pregnant.
That's an awful movie.
Yeah, he's just looking for a paycheck.
That's when it was off the rails.
Awful.
That was when he was in his Bruce Willis phase.
Wait, so, hold on.
Yeah, he got pregnant in that movie, right?
Yeah.
Jesus, that's weird.
I didn't actually stop to think about it because I saw it when I was a kid.
Yeah.
When you think about that now, that movie was ahead of its time.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
They would love that movie now.
Super love.
They're going to remake it.
Oh, that was him in What's His Face doing more movies together.
Danny DeVito and him.
Twins was like that was a classic movie. Twins, yeah was twins yeah that was we should watch that movie again junior dude even back then i knew that
movie was gonna blow chunks and i really yeah even back my dad was like you want to see a new arnold
he was my favorite i went nah arnold pregnant nah what a this woke movement in 1994 there was no
you didn't know about that yeah i did even even back then. No, you didn't. Yeah, dude, I tried storming the Capitol
when I was eight. Back then it was okay to be
like, you know, what is this
fucking pussy shit? You know what I mean?
Back then he was like, men don't have babies.
Maga, even though he was 12.
He had a red hat on.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
He said, one day this is going to mean something.
You can't wear a red hat now.
You can't without people getting up.
Isn't that weird? You can have wear a red hat now you can't without people getting isn't that weird you could have that red i know i swear all the time yeah and i would hear people
i'd be out with my kids people would yell something like what the hell i'm what it is
though this crazy thing about it is like i hate that things are so politicized like that i know
me too like i was at the gym the other day right and there was a white girl on the treadmill with
a mask on and i had a visceral reaction.
As you should. I'm proud of you.
But you know what, though? You hit her?
I hit her.
No, no, but check this out. Before COVID
and all this, if you were at the gym
and you saw somebody with a mask
on, your first thought
would be...
That's at the airport, dude.
Your first thought would be, oh, something's up with airport dude yeah your first thought was anywhere oh something's up
with this yeah of course right something might be oh they're crazy are they no no no you think
maybe they had like some sort of deficiency or something you would be thinking about like
but then now because of all the politics you see that and you go boom it's same thing with a red
hat you're at the airport you see somebody red hat like from behind you might think oh this
freaking yeah you come around it's like red socks you can't wear a
red hat that's not fair that sucks though it does suck it does suck somebody what about guys who
what about super liberal dudes that are just wearing red hats their whole lives they're like
well it's like crips and bloods now you can't you know what i mean true um i'm i'm there's something
about me in my mind that when uh i mean like I'm not political, but when I know that that about the red hat thing makes me want to get a red hat that doesn't say that and wear it.
It's the same thing about me.
I realize when I see potholes, I aim for them, dude.
And I go, what am I doing?
I have a thought where I'm like, what am I doing? Like, I have a thought where I'm like,
what am I doing?
I'm going to fuck my tires up.
Dude, I've changed my tires.
I've had my car two years.
Nine tires.
I've got nine new tires.
That doesn't even make sense to me.
Well, bro, I keep-
You have an issue.
And then I was driving once with my friend.
He says, dude, it's because you're self-destructive.
And I go, oh.
He's like, you're self-sabotage.
I'm like, oh, fuck.
You want more problems.
I want more problems. I want more problems.
I want to get the hat.
This is our Chris Parks though.
Yeah.
Do you know what I mean?
Video, TikTok.
Yeah.
TikTok.
No, I don't.
Don't, dude.
I don't park like that.
I am also.
Even self-sabotage and driving?
I'm a crazy guy, dude.
I'm a crazy guy.
Legit crazy.
I think so.
But it's, you know, working out.
It's okay.
It's up and down, you know.
Sometimes it's good.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I think you're that way because I think it's just a comic thing.
It's the same thing.
Yeah.
It's the same thing.
Like, if I feel the crowd is uncomfortable about something I'm talking about, then I'm like.
You want to go push it a little more.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh, now we're really going to go in right now.
I know, same.
I love that.
Same, same.
But you're not going to drive towards potholes like a madman.
I'm not a crazy person.
He's doing it like this.
I'm rich.
Fix it.
No, I hate car trouble, dude.
But I still do it.
When he calls AAA, it's like Norm from Cheers where they're like, Chris.
Chris, what's up?
Same wheel.
Hey, there's other videos about this explaining what happened.
Bro, let me.
I heard it's part of a show.
Yeah, I thought it was.
It's all set up.
It's part of Homeboy's show.
What show?
Hi High something?
No, yeah, it's part of that.
No, no, no.
There's Mr. and Mrs. Smith.
Yes.
That too, yeah.
I saw the Childish Gambino.
But let me tell you something.
This, I saw this video.
Everyone was like, oh my God, what is this?
This is nothing.
He just gets off stage.
It's not that.
But that's what it is.
But it's for a TV show.
Like everyone's in on it.
It's for a TV show.
It's part of the TV show, Mrs. and Mrs. Smith.
Okay.
Not the cool one with Brad Pitt.
You know you want to say not the white one.
Just say it.
Just say it.
I love Donald Glover, so it could be good.
Dude, Brad Pitt and Angelina, they go beyond.
They're not white or black.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
When you're cute, it goes beyond.
Yeah, they're fine, both of them.
The new Mr. and Mrs. Smith is just, I know, but you see it and you're like, oh, okay.
The first thing you think is, oh, they're doing it woke.
Yes.
That's the first thing you think.
Yes and no.
It might be good.
And I'm not saying they're not good actors.
It's a black dude and an Asian?
No, but I can feel the diversity meeting.
I'm with you.
Yeah, exactly.
But the thing is – but then the next step, though, is like, but that is Donald Glover.
No.
Well, yeah.
See, my head goes, I love Donald Glover.
You could put him.
He could be Indiana Jones.
I don't think.
And I see the Asian Wi-Fi.
I know what they're doing.
Yeah.
It's like.
You know what?
I know what you're doing.
Honestly.
It's two weeks in a row with Asian hate.
No, no, no.
Here's what I think.
She didn't say nothing.
No, here's what I think.
It's all jokes.
Make them both Asian.
Make them both black.
You know? Like, the whole mixed race thing is crazy. It's what I think. It's all jokes. Make them both Asian. Make them both black. You know?
Like, the whole mixed race thing is crazy.
It's so...
Yeah, I'm tired of it.
Every commercial you turn on...
I know.
It's like another mixed couple's right in the car in Asia.
Yeah.
Yes.
You know?
My favorite is when the commercial has an old mixed race couple.
It's like, dude, that's not happening.
Yeah.
I got one for you.
I used to talk about this on Facebook. You're going to talk about the Ghostbusters one? No, no, no. Oh, what? The one that's not happening. Yeah. I got one for you. I used to talk about this on the page.
You're going to talk about the Ghostbusters one?
No, no, no.
Oh, what?
The one that went too far.
Yeah, you talked about Ghostbusters.
First of all, no, no, this is different.
But first of all, when I could feel the diversity meeting, when you could feel it.
Exactly.
When you could feel it.
The agenda, when you know the agenda.
You feel it on this.
Here's an example.
Hilton was on one.
Okay. So there's a commercial where it's a dad.
Yeah.
And his daughter who has Down syndrome.
Oh, right.
You told me.
You did the bit.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's what I'm saying is though,
but that's one of those ones where you go,
what are we doing?
Yeah.
They're checking all the boxes.
No, but that's-
Well, they do stay in hotels.
I understand it,
but what I don't like about it is it's like-
Wait in the car, sweetie.
You're using that. You're using that. Yeah, you're using that yeah you're using that to make us feel like well we
can't go to any other yeah because that means come on come on hilton let's see what you know
what you're doing is he an asian dude down syndrome it's tough to tell they look different
what dude legit question is this it When you prefer a dream vacation.
This is not it.
This is the new Haunted Mansion on Disney.
It's not it, but this commercial is retarded.
Hold up.
That guy doesn't have Down syndrome.
He has a look for sure.
Wow.
They brought the wrong commercial, and I assume that dude had Down syndrome.
There's another one.
There's another commercial, too, that Hilton has where it's two gay guys,
and they have a kid.
And it's two good-looking white guys and a little white kid.
And obviously they're the dads.
And I used to think to myself.
What world are they living in?
I used to think to myself, they adopted a white kid.
You know how hard it is to get a white baby?
Oh, true, yeah.
You know what I'm saying?
They wouldn't be staying at the Hilton.
They'd be at the Four Seasons.
Oh, interesting.
You know?
Yeah.
But they were on this thing.
And what I'm saying is like, what I go is like, it's nothing against people with Down
Syndrome.
It's nothing against gay people.
None of that.
What I'm saying is, when they use that stuff,
you feel it.
And it doesn't help the cause.
Well, it might, but
for me, it's just like
when I can see the meeting or the agenda,
it's like, alright. But, you know, I'm a white guy,
so it's a fuck.
Well, yeah, if the show's good, it's good.
Who gives a fuck? Who cares?
Wait, hold on. I got new dates on tour.
Go to chrislea.com.
I got a bunch of new dates.
New material.
New material.
And I got places I've never been to, bro.
Ever heard of Saginaw?
I haven't.
I'm going to be there, dude.
I'm going to be there.
Is that in Canada?
Saginaw is up there.
It's in, what's the one, Michigan.
But it's close.
It's like on the border?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's cold.
It's freezing.
Yeah, it's going to be cold.
But I'm doing all sorts of crazy ones.
Chattanooga. I don't even know if I've Freezing. Yeah, it's going to be cold, but I'm doing all sorts of crazy ones. Chattanooga.
I don't even know if I've been there.
Yeah.
That's always where they film First 48.
No, that's New Orleans.
Chattanooga is nice.
Is it?
Chattanooga is dope.
I feel like.
If you want to live in Tennessee, go to Chattanooga.
The last time I was in Chattanooga.
Anyway, go to chrisley.com.
Last time I was in Chattanooga was on my birthday, March 11th and 12th, 2020.
The world went crazy the next day.
It locked down.
I didn't even know if I was going to be able to get home.
That's how crazy it was.
I was on a plane to New Orleans to do shows.
My agent goes, no, Bert's
doing it in New Orleans. You'll be fine.
Bert's still doing it. I'm on the plane.
I'm on the plane. And then
Bert texts me and goes, dude, I'm canceling.
They're locking it down. I go, you're canceling? I literally didn't even talk to him. I got off the plane. And then Bert texted me. He goes, dude, I'm canceling. They're locking it down.
I go, you're canceling?
So I literally didn't even talk to him.
I got off the plane, left my opener and feature on there.
I go, I got to go.
Awesome.
I'm not being stuck here.
They stayed on the plane.
And then we had to cancel all the shows.
LAX?
LAX.
Just walked off the plane, demanded to get off.
Hell yeah, dude.
Wow, dude, you're real woke.
Yeah, dude.
I stole the plane after that.
You're liberal.
What?
Because you got off the plane.
I'd rather you call me the F word than a liberal.
You're a libtard. I'd rather you think I have Down syndrome than call me a liberal.
Okay, well.
Well, we're still.
That's up for debate.
Yeah, we're still not sure.
You're liberal, dude.
You got scared of COVID and you went home.
And now I know.
No, I didn't get scared of COVID.
I've had it many of times.
You're so scared of COVID.
No, I just don't want to get stuck in New Orleans.
And you voted for, not even just Biden, Kamala Harris.
Once Kamala Harris was on the ticket, you go, okay, I'm in.
Dude, I'll fight you.
Yeah, he didn't even check Biden.
He just checked her.
Just her.
Anyway, dude, the whole thing is that Mr. Smith movie is coming out.
Oh, but I forgot.
We probably should kick this.
I want to thank you guys for holding down the fort when I was doing all this stuff with the baby girl.
Yeah, thank you guys.
And all the fans out there, thank you.
Even Reddit gave me the day off.
Oh, wow.
So that's nice.
Wow.
Guys, continue.
They gave me the day off.
Commence with the hate.
Release the hounds uh you uh yeah that was a tough one that was a tough one yeah still is i mean still yeah it's a fight but she's doing better
right good and she's home she's home okay good thick 11 pounds oh good yeah i guess man i'm
thinking about putting on keto well i don't think that she needs to go on a diet just yet, right?
It's a problem, dude.
She's so big.
You'll see.
She's so big.
So, all right.
Well, good.
You look good.
All right, good.
I'm all right.
Everyone's like, oh, he's on Ozempic.
It's stress.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But Ozempic is going to – gonna isn't that crazy but that's like
now i see a lot of people being asked that they they lose like i saw steven a smith on bill maher
show yeah you know and bill maher oh man i'm sorry i'm sorry i missed that made a joke about that
because steven a lot he lost a lot of weight and bill maher says ozempic and he immediately was
like no man i work out a little more that's a thing now isn't it Maher says Ozempic and he immediately was like nah man I work out that's a thing now
isn't it weird
the Ozempic shame though
yeah
like if I use
I don't give a fuck
if I was on
I'm like yeah
Ozempic I don't eat
yeah put it in my ass
I want
but now it's a thing
where people lose weight
and they'll be like
it's not Ozempic
it's like who cares
the thing though
that's going to be so bad
for people in 10 years
half of the comics
are going to die
no but like
but I think that the problem is like...
You don't want to try it, Eric?
There's a difference between losing weight
and looking skinny.
People look weird.
They do?
No, no, no.
When they go zero to 100?
People look weird, dude.
Well, on a Zimpy?
Yeah.
When they lose a lot of weight.
Yes.
Because it's zero to 100.
A buddy of mine,
he was telling me about it.
His wife did it.
And he was just like,
oh,
he's having issues.
Oh.
So he was a black guy.
Lost her ass.
Your buddy's black.
We're not going to talk about it.
But all I'm saying is.
She lost her ass.
All I'm saying is,
Ozempic does,
like,
yes,
you look,
but like,
it's not.
Well,
when you get,
as you get older,
your skin sags.
That's why you have to
the skin can't i know but still the skin goes the bigger problem with those zimpics though what
they're finding people that do it long term it's making the bones real like brittle like real soft
like everything gets weaker just like like the samuel jackson character in the movie with the
fucking uh what's the movie with the fucking un what's that movie with the – Paul Fiction. Fucking Unbreakable.
God damn it.
Unbreakable.
I love that movie, dude.
Yeah, that's one of – that guy's – that's of the three of all of his movies, that's one of the best.
Dude, I –
The rest of his movies are trash.
Samuel L. Jackson?
I've been saying how good that movie is, and when that came out, the movie was like – people were like, ah.
And it stood this as the time.
Now people like it.
It's just Unbreakable.
So good.
Samuel L. Jackson?
Are we talking about the same guy?
Yeah.
Unbreakable is awesome.
Sixth Sense is it.
Sixth Sense, yeah.
Sixth Sense.
Sixth Sense.
He's not in Sixth Sense.
I'm just saying, we're talking about M. Night Shyamalan movies.
Unbreakable.
Brennan is gone.
Gone.
Yeah, gone.
It's Ozan.
But you know which one I like?
I like The Village.
That's the only one I never saw.
Oh, yeah.
That's the only one I ever saw.
I've seen every single one.
Did you ever see The Beach one?
Oh, my God.
So bad.
So bad.
Oh, my God.
Old, right?
So bad.
Right?
Oh, my God.
10 years?
But no, it's called Old, right?
Yes.
Fucking 10 years, he says.
You're gone.
Is that not confusing? No, it's Old, though. No old though no it's called you should have said it's called him you say it's old though i would go at 10 years it was
five years ago it probably came out five years no way longer than that uh 2021 no way three years
ago no is it really three years yeah it wasn't old yeah do you know how long ago 10 years is
you know how long ago it's honestly it's't old. Do you know how long ago 10 years is? Do you know how long ago two years is?
Honestly, it's almost 11 years.
You know how long ago four years?
Was that three years?
Almost four years.
That's through COVID.
Yeah, it was after that.
That movie is really bad.
Anyway...
So bad.
You don't understand.
Yeah.
This guy makes some terrible movies.
My favorite kind of directors make the worst movies and best movies.
That's what I'm saying about him.
Because they take chances.
Yeah.
Like, I don't understand.
How did the guy
that made six cents
make chance?
They take big swings.
Yeah.
I guess.
You're right.
The only guy who doesn't miss
is Quentin Tarantino.
True artist.
Like, dude,
you watch Stanley Kubrick.
Some of those movies
are so good
and some of them you're like,
I don't know.
What am I watching?
Yeah, but there's a difference
between bad and weird.
True, yeah.
Okay, now this guy, it's either really good or like who financed this?
I didn't mind Split.
No, Split was great.
Did you see Airbender?
No.
No, I saw a little.
I turned it off.
Split's great.
The home footage one that they did was terrible.
Split was fine.
It wasn't great.
No, Split was good, dude. Split was legit. It wasn't great. No, split was good, dude.
Split was legit.
Signs?
Signs was okay, but no, the found footage one.
Are you kidding me?
Get your voice.
Okay, okay.
So let me just go over this real quick.
Educate his dumb ass.
It's okay.
No, it's terrible.
It's watchable, though.
Fuck you.
So there's no science department of this alien race?
No, I don't.
Why would you go to a planet made of 90% of the thing
that you're allergic to?
Bro, I don't care about that.
How fucking stupid is that?
The visit.
The visit is bad.
You don't like it either?
You don't like...
The visit is bad.
Signs is...
The visit's so bad.
It's so bad.
That's a found footage movie.
So, Signs is at least watchable.
The acting and the...
Signs is so good.
I love it too. So good? No, he's right about that though. All right, anyway. So Signs is at least watchable. Signs is so good.
I love it too.
So good?
No, he's right about that though.
All right, anyway, whatever.
I'm done with all of you.
What else you got, Nick?
Lady in the Water.
Oh, my gosh. I didn't see that one.
That's the other one I didn't see.
I'm going to see that.
Oh, God, After Earth was terrible.
Yeah, that was bad.
Hey, Golden Hour.
I was just wondering, should I bother dating anymore?
Just to make it short and quick, 2017 survived stage four embrional carcinoma.
Some of the surgeries left me unable to ejaculate.
Everything still works fine.
I'm just shooting ghost loads.
And since then, it's caused some relationship issues and some weird experiences.
I'm either fucking forever or just pretending that something happens.
And I often wonder if that leaves the woman feeling like she's not enough.
And if that's the case, should I bother dating anymore?
Oh, wow.
Oh, man.
First of all.
You want to offend everybody with that sweater?
That sweater.
Okay, but anyway.
Here's the thing.
I just think this guy needs to just open up with, hey, listen, I can't come, but I can fuck for as long as you need.
Oh, yeah.
He needs to just open up.
You think right away?
No, no.
That should be on his Tinder profile.
Cancer survivor can't come, but dick stays hard for as long as you need.
Yeah, his handle should be ghostload50.
Yeah.
Everyone's in line.
If he doesn't tell them, and yes, they will feel that way.
How come you haven't cum yet?
Is it me?
Oh, my God.
No, you just be like, no, I can't.
So just shut your mouth.
He definitely shouldn't stop dating because sex isn't everything he's gonna want to he doesn't want to die alone yeah like get a friend
dude he needs a girl to like dress him better you know what i mean and then go slow 24 7 yeah i i
mean don't yeah dating is yeah it's not just about the fucking yeah i mean you you know what about
like falling in love and shit and like yeah that's this guy yeah god this guy
mr fallen god okay love's cool take it down a notch no no but i think he does need to if he's
listening to just all you got to do is just like be up front with it maybe not right away but
no i think he should that's a right away thing what are you vince mcmahon's therapist that's a
right away thing that's like that's those, like, are you super religious?
Do you have kids?
Do you enjoy ghost loads?
How do you feel about ghosts?
It's in that list.
Yeah.
You don't want to date somebody for, like, six weeks,
and then you find out something about them where you're like, whoa.
Why you didn't tell me that?
That'd be cool to be like, oh, here it comes.
Here it comes.
Oh, psych.
Psych. I'm just kidding. I'm still going. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That'd be cool to be like Oh here it comes Here it comes Oh Psych Psych Just kidding
I'm still going
Yeah yeah yeah
We could be here all night
Yeah he definitely
Should keep dating though
But like
I don't even know
If that's even something that
There does have to be a point
Where he has to tell them
Like you let me know
When you're done
Cause I'm here all night
Because it's like
His cardio
Now he has to tell the girl
Like please
You know what Don't fake Don't like his cardio now you have to tell the girl like you please you know what
don't
don't fake
don't like
I'm
this is for you
yeah but he says
he says he still has a
does he still have a reaction
like does he still feel good
yeah he says
yeah so then
yeah if it feels good for him
yeah yeah yeah
if it doesn't feel anything
then it's like
there's just no finish line
he's just running a
lifelong marathon
well there is for him though
not really
there's no finish line if he has but he's saying he doesn't jizz but is for him though not really if he had but
he's saying he doesn't jizz but he does have an orgasm is what i'm saying is that true well that's
what he also goes slow just means no kid that's what i'm asking you gotta get this guy that's
what i'm asking is it just pick up a lot of questions for him so get him on the show i asked
a hard-hitting questions i think you're right because uh dr had a vasectomy, and he explained it as ghost loads.
And I think that's the term he's using from King of the Sting when he was on it.
But, yeah, he comes, but nothing comes out.
Oh, not a big problem.
But wait, if you have a vasectomy, liquid still comes out.
This sounds like a win-win for everybody, right?
Dr. Drew has ghost loads.
Unless he wants kids.
But if he wants kids.
No, no, no, forget about that.
That's not what he's asking about.
That's tripping me out.
Well, I'm thinking about his future. No, no, no. Forget about that. That's not what he's asking about. That's tripping me out. Well, I'm thinking about his future.
No, but this is great.
So now you can like, you know, you can have.
Bust him.
You're not going to come on her face.
You're just going to be like.
She's going to be like.
Hey, hey, hey.
But you got something.
Oh, you got a mustard.
Oh.
Oh, here it comes.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh.. Oh. I'm a great. I'm a great. I'm a great. I'm a great. I'm a great. I'm a great. I'm a great. I'm a great. I'm a great. I'm a great. I'm a it? Is it? Is it? Wait a minute. Is it Grey Poupon?
You're just like...
No, you mix it up.
You make a nice thing, but...
Cinnabon icing.
I'm making the cum, sweetie.
Come over.
A few more seconds.
Oh, man.
We're stupid.
I like the miming.
It's like a new Charlie Chaplin movie.
He looks up.
He's like...
Oh, my God god he goes like this
that's
she's jerking him off like this
so stupid
yeah you gotta get this guy on the phone
I think he's good
he just busts loads with their ghost love
maybe we'll try to talk to him
On the Patreon episode
Which will be out next
Okay
Maybe we should set him up
For a Tinder thing
See if
Where's he at
Do we know where he's at
Try and get him a date
Who wants to date
Fucking Ghost Rider over here
I think it sounds
Ghost Rider
I don't think
That would be the one
I think that he thinks
It's bad
How he's saying it
In his head
Like
Yeah
But I think that the things that he's
saying i think a girl might be like oh no okay so you don't okay so it's not messy right you know
what i mean you're not busting loads in me and you know i don't gotta be on birth control uh you know
you're not coming on my tits or whatever jesus. Also, BJs, you don't got to swallow shit.
Oh, my God.
I keep going.
You know, you're not filling my asshole.
We got it, dude.
When he said, come on my tits, you're like, you're not coming on my tits.
Brandon is like, I keep going like 30 minutes later.
You know, you're not.
My back isn't filled with, you know, dry.
I'm just jerking off.
Yeah.
Keep going. You know what you're not, my back isn't filled with, you know, dried. I'm just jerking off. Yeah. Keep going.
You know what I mean?
He's like fucking Bubba Gump with the shrimp.
Cajun come, Japanese come.
So I think that it's just, I think it's just like he – I think he has a different –
I think he'll be surprised how many women might be like, this is great.
This is great.
Yeah, I mean, I don't know.
Maybe.
And that's all I got to say about that.
It's not a good thing.
He's a jelly donut without the jelly.
You put yourself in the situation.
You're like, where's the cum?
No, but women, they want to – they go like, oh, look what I made you do. That's the cum no but but women they want to we go like oh
look what i made you do you know that's because i'm sexy that's what they you know no one wants
a cinnabon without the icing you feel me well actually i do they're too sweet you're gay man
i would love a cinnabon without the ice cream that's so stupid icing not that much i agree
oh i want extra little ew dude oh i get all iced up yeah dude wherever dude put in my eyes um well All ice. Yeah, dude.
Wherever, dude.
Put it in my eyes.
This guy comes right here, right? Oh, yeah.
This guy didn't have a problem.
This guy AI.
What's up, boys?
Travis from Palm Beach, Florida.
I got a dad slash parenting question.
Brendan, I know you're very involved in the sports, but what about academics?
Are you guys going to the teacher-parent meetings?
Are you involved?
Oh, yeah.
Are you helping your kid read and write and all that?
My son is seven.
He's in a private school here.
And my wife went to a parent meeting the other day.
And it seems like everything's good.
He's smart.
He's doing what he needs to do, but they still want more.
And I think their expectations
are way more than they used to be.
So what do you guys
think?
Parenting? School?
What do you guys... I don't know.
Are they expecting weight?
I don't miss them. I went and it was like Forrest Gump.
When Forrest Gump was talking, I was like, is he
like me or is he smart?
You know what I'm saying?
Two Forrest Gump references., I was like, is he like me or is he smart? You know what I'm saying? But you've got to be careful what school.
Two Forrest Gump references.
I know.
Did you just watch it or something?
No, I haven't seen it in years.
But the parent-teacher conference, you've got to depend what school you're going to because it's a business.
So they go, man, he's really good at this, but with a little more help, we can get him here.
And they're like, we have a therapist or we have a tutor.
You know what I'm saying?
He's vibing a little bit. No, I'm telling you, it's a business. I know, I know. Yeah, you know what I'm saying? Yeah, it's vibing a little bit when you're like, we have a therapist, or we have a tutor. You know what I'm saying? He's vibing a little bit.
No, I'm telling you, it's a business.
I know, I know.
Yeah, you know what I'm saying?
Yeah.
Yeah, it's vibing a little bit when you're like, it's a business.
You'll see.
No, no, no.
You'll see.
I know.
No, you don't know.
I do know that.
Please.
I know it.
Please.
All right.
Say I know it.
No, but yeah.
That's a good point, though.
Keep that in mind, you know?
But there's nothing worse if your kid's struggling academically.
Like sports, you're like, all right, we can figure out.
We can put in some work.
But academically, they're like, man, this kid sucks at math.
You're like, fuck.
Yeah, but fuck math.
You know what I'm talking about?
It's good to problem solve.
You need to keep it going.
Bro.
They don't do cursive, though.
I know.
They got that out, right?
It's no more.
Yeah.
Yeah, but it has been years.
Okay.
But still, what the fuck are you guys talking about
he said it
when's the last time
you like
wrote in cursive
I do it all the time
I do it every day
when I wake up in the morning
I do my diary
I do my diary
get him some paper and pencil right now
I want to see some cursive
usually
sign autographs
actually that's a good point
I don't do that
yeah you don't
but what my name I do
of course with your name
alright so the story's changing a little bit
that's not even...
I know, I know.
So are people...
Darling, with a feather.
So, wait.
My dearest Kristen. So, hold on.
So, what about people's
names, though? They do the... Let me write cursive.
Yeah, let's see. I guess I haven't
done it in a long time. Yeah, yeah, go ahead.
It is shaky. Hey, write oops.
Oops.
Oops.
Oh, my God.
It looks good, though.
It looks good, though.
I'm not bad, yeah.
Candle, candle.
A new...
Oh, wow.
It's weird.
It's sexy.
It looks good, though.
I have good writing, but... Spell zoo. It's weird. It's kind of sexy. It looks good, though. I have good writing, but...
Spell zoo.
Put a Z.
Let me see your Z.
Buzz.
What's Z?
I'm good.
Your zoo's not bad.
Yeah.
His hamline's actually pretty nice.
Yeah.
For not to...
I mean, bro, I haven't done that in years, bro.
Does it feel good?
Doesn't it feel good?
Could you do it?
You think...
I don't even know, dude.
That's good.
Oops. Candle. That's regular,? Could you do it? I don't even know, dude. That's good. Oops.
Candle.
That's regular how I would do it.
And then zoo, but then my second pass was really killer.
It's pretty good.
It looks like 300 movies.
But that's what it is, though.
Yeah.
Next.
Yeah.
You want to do it?
No, I didn't do it.
Is this a ransom?
Where'd you get magazine letters?
Dude, you know what? Immersive. You know my year. You're just copying mine. You know my year. Where did you get magazine letters?
Dude, you know what?
You know my year.
You're just copying mine.
You know my year.
Write a different word, asshole.
Write doctor or something.
He's got a good candle.
You know what, though? I only use...
Yeah.
Yeah, you get it.
The other one.
Yeah, the other one. Whatever that one whatever that is the regular one of course
i haven't used cursive in in a hot second wow i just realized there's no reason to yeah yeah i
know but what was the reason i have no idea there was never a reason how about this in my high
school my last year of high school was Jewish. I was taking a typing class.
It says Jemish.
That's a M.
That's a W.
That's an M, dude.
Jemish, it says.
Jewish.
Ask him.
Let me see.
Jew.
No, you changed it.
So that's an M to you?
That says Jum.
It says Jew.
Why are you
writing ju
I don't want to
mix it up
why not
let me see
yeah that's
jim
that's
clearly jim
this is
jemish
jemish
yeah it's
been a hot
second
sentences
and chants
his j looks like your Z.
Yeah, well, that's how you do a cursive Z.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Wow.
How do you know that?
I just remember, bro.
I'm not even going to.
All right.
Yeah, the kids don't have to do it anymore.
That's good.
I mean, I remember when you learned it.
We want to thank Podcast One for our gifts.
Remember when you learned it and you were like, why do we have to learn this?
I was.
I don't even remember.
Okay, I do.
I don't even remember learning that.
I actually do, yeah. The school is so different now probably than when you know i don't even know
well they have now they all have computers and ipads and shit like remember there was a computer
lab yeah they probably all have it now right yeah no no ipads in the class right okay oh i'm
surprised but like the teacher's not up there anymore when you know when they used to do like
they just put the projection yeah yeah they don't know, when they used to do like, they just put the projection screen in.
They don't do that anymore.
Well, right.
They wouldn't do that anymore.
Now they will have screens for that, but they're still doing math at the kazoo.
Right.
Dude, I don't know.
I think.
Calvin's at school now.
He's at school now.
Really?
What level school is that?
Well, I don't know.
It's just like playing.
Yeah.
It's called recess school. Yeah. It's called recess school.
Yeah.
But we even asked him.
We asked him.
We were like, did you learn it?
Somebody asked him.
I think it was my dad.
He was like, what did you learn at school today?
He said, nothing.
We just played.
That's what you need.
It's like wrangling cats.
Just don't let them die.
Take care.
Right?
Yeah, that's all it is.
Yeah.
A couple weeks ago on the Patreon episode, we talked about making a murderer.
A couple weeks ago on the Patreon episode, we talked about Making a Murderer.
This is Brendan Dassey from the documentary's brother, Brad Dassey,
who still lives in Wisconsin, and he's a white rapper.
Yeah, we did.
We did.
On the Patreon episode, though.
We're going to talk to the guy.
We're about to talk to him.
I've got a question, though.
I said, didn't we watch this?
And then you looked at him and answered.
I thought he asked.
You did.
I did. That's what I was going to ask.
It wasn't him, though.
But will the Patreon fans know that we're referencing?
I'm in.
I'm locked in.
Will the fans know what we're talking about?
No, because Nick is bringing it up.
That's okay.
It was on Patreon.
All right.
Yeah, so I think we watch his.
Okay, that's cool.
And we're talking to him on the Patreon episode or this one?
This one.
Oh, okay, cool.
Why is there an air traffic control guy here?
Oh, no, he's filming for the other.
He's shooting for the guys.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Burbank air traffic.
Okay, flight 75.
Now he's doing drive-thru, yeah.
Okay, is he taking orders at Jack in the Box?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Chick-fil-A, Chick-fil-A.
And what do you have?
Out front Chick-fil-A.
Do you want to go supersize?
Let's have the thing here.
Yeah.
All right.
All right, let's do here. Yeah. All right. All right.
Let's do it.
It's kind of bang.
Yeah.
Injustice slammed in the face of two innocent people.
He's so natural.
They didn't do it.
They didn't do it.
No.
Come to your senses.
Everything is just foolish.
Things clearly show that it was just a joke.
Cops were only there just to prod and pour.
Nice.
Not a fair trial.
Not a fair game. Pull things back. Just a lie and shame. Cool jeans. Cool jeans.
I love his F&F shirt. Such a whirlwind Got the whole world talking Talking trash Just stick to the facts Leave alone Mr. Crash
Dude's trying to run
Trying to hide
Random Minnesota
Give the guy a soda
Just trying to live his life
While you gotta talk smack
Random Minnesota
Give him a soda
Give the guy a soda
That's hard
That's hard
Did you guys all watch the documentary?
Yeah
The first one, yeah.
It's been years.
The second one sucked, but...
In this case, we're about to talk,
and you don't say shit to people's faces all the time.
You're like, nice teeth, fuck face.
Every guy, dude.
I know.
It's awkward.
You know what?
You added extra to it.
For comedy.
Thank you.
Where's your hair, you piece of shit? Your fucking thing is too far back you dumb dumb that's all right uh let's do it wow his thing is wow who knows what music
is in his thing that's hilarious okay well he's an artist that's like myspace days yeah didn't
just intimidate by myspace back then and yeah and what? I feel like it was a bad investment.
Is it still something?
Yeah.
Wow, that's crystal clear.
This guy's got a great camera.
What's up, big dog?
Hey, how are you?
What's up, man?
How you doing, man?
I was just looking for my keys.
Your keys?
That's what you said when you first saw the music.
Oh, that's funny.
Good callback, dude at me because you start like this i was thinking of an opening line and that's that works dude you hit a home run
how's life going bud yeah it's going all right how's the fight going for your, is Brendan your cousin?
He's my half-brother.
Oh, damn.
And how's the fight going?
Those guys are still locked away, yeah?
Yeah, they're still locked away.
Wisconsin's trying to block everything they can, which is complete.
Can we swear on this show?
Yeah.
Go ahead, man.
Fuck yeah.
Fuck yeah.
Well, Wisconsin sucks, of course, because they're trying to block everything they can.
So Kathleen Zellner, she just filed another motion, and Wisconsin is complaining that it's too long.
So she has to file another motion, a shorter one.
So, you know, I mean, I figured that was going to happen because Wisconsin is just trying to block everything they can.
And they don't have any real evidence against my half brother.
Well, that's what I wanted to ask you.
Like from the documentary, you know, we don't know the ins and outs of the case.
But from the documentary, they look guilty as shit.
Right. But obviously there's a there's it's a documentary.
So there's an agenda.
So what's the real facts?
Who did it? Am I right?
documentary so there's an agenda so what's the real facts who did it am i right yeah i mean uh that all signs are pointing to my other half brother bobby um and there's a couple witnesses
and things that uh state that um they saw him physically and uh and then also there was another
uh there was an affidavit from my other half-brother, Blaine,
who said that Bobby was primarily using the computer.
So I don't know.
I don't give a fuck who the hell it is.
I just want my life to go back to normal.
Yeah, I was going to ask, man,
what's it like having a documentary like that come out,
like a 10-part documentary that sort of captivated the world?
It was huge
yeah what's that what was that like the whirlwind of all that i mean how did it affect your life
it uh well i knew it was you know i knew this movie was being made all this time because my
dad kept on saying hey they're making a movie about your brother. And so for the longest time, and that was like a long time ago in the very beginning,
then I had forgotten about it for years and years.
And then finally it was going to be coming out.
And I'm like, oh, shit, you know, brace yourself.
You don't know what to expect.
So I was pretty much shitting my pants because I didn't know if it was going to go negative or positive.
So it's been kind of both.
But in the beginning it was positive, right?
Because that thing captivated the nation of like, get them out of jail.
It was very positive.
But then what do you think made it not happen?
Why are they still in jail?
Well, it's really hard to get somebody out of jail, right?
No, no, I know, but what I'm saying is...
Unless you have Kim Kardashian.
I'm saying, but this is a 10-part documentary.
The Innocence Project got involved.
Oh, they did?
Yeah, what I'm saying is, like, you know, after all that and in the end,
like, why do you think that it didn't have the effect that the filmmakers actually wanted?
Before you answer, because I've heard two sides.
I heard the documentary obviously has an agenda,
has to be entertaining.
And then I was on tour in Wisconsin,
and a few people that work in the judicial system came to me and said,
the evidence that we have, you wouldn't have a documentary.
You wouldn't be able to run with it because it's clear who did it,
meaning you're, you know.
The guy. The guys. But you're saying he didn't do it and i'm sorry i thought i heard you say your other half brother maybe did it yeah so i have four half brothers uh so let me
just back up because everybody gets this shit fucking confused yeah yeah with uh everything Fucking confused. Yeah. Yeah with everything and so I just want to say that Steven Avery is not my uncle
And he's only related to my half brothers because of Barb. They're their mom. Okay
We share a common father. His name is Pete and so
I have four half brothers. There's Bobby Brian Bobby, Brian, Blaine, and Brendan.
And so that's how we're related.
Those are all my half-brothers.
And so Kathleen Zellner, of course, is Stephen Avery's lawyer.
Right.
She's been working hard at this case for a long time.
And I'll say, you know, people that live in Wisconsin think they're guilty.
They don't even take the time to research into the facts. Of course, yeah.
No, I mean, they're just reading the headlines and shit.
I watch a lot of ID Channel, and there's a lot of bullshit out there.
There was one recently I just watched, the American something, whatever,
and it was about these cops that thought that these people that were kidnapped were –
American Nightmare, yeah, the gong guy.
Oh, yeah, that's a good one, yeah.
And that, yeah, that really kind of, you know, in the beginning I was like,
well, it sounds like they're just kind of making the shit up.
Agreed.
And as you got further into it, you just got pissed off
because this is kind of how the shit happened with my half-brother.
Yeah, yeah.
So, and then I had to buy the movie kiss the girls because that was tied into the whole
shit and that has nothing to fucking do with what happened that that more the guy was tying women to
trees and then walking them in dungeons in the basement yeah shit so that has absolutely nothing
to do so like a lot of the story that was made up is just fucking fiction.
And it's,
it's just,
uh,
it's an outrage really.
So what are you going to,
what can you do though?
At this point,
it's,
it's been a hot second,
you know?
So I don't know.
Do you still,
I can,
there's,
there's,
uh,
there's a few things I've been trying to do to kind of build awareness myself.
I,
I've made three songs for my
half brother. The first one that was big is They Didn't Do It. That's the video you guys saw.
I think slabs. Yeah. And I just want to also say sorry about your kids being in the hospital,
Brendan. Oh, thanks, brother. Yeah. I'm glad everything worked out. I got kids myself.
Yeah. Appreciate it, brother. Thank you, man.
But, yeah, thanks for the comments on the video.
And that's where the Keith thing came from because my friends were showing me.
I have a lot of friends that watch your show, and they told me about it,
and they're like, oh, damn, you know.
And so I checked it out.
Pretty cool.
But, yeah, I don't know.
This whole thing is a huge mess, and I've been just trying to build awareness the best I can.
And then I've been getting backlash from my half-brother's family who just make up a bunch of bullshit lies.
So I personally believe that more people in the family know more about what the fuck happened than they're letting on.
And whoever the hell
it is, I really hope
justice happens soon.
So who's in jail? Stephen Avery
and Brendan?
Stephen Avery and his nephew, Brendan.
Yeah, my half-brother.
Quick question, can Brendan watch WrestleMania
yet?
No, he can't watch WrestleMania.
I don't know. I know he's limited on the apps he can
uh check out um but yeah i know for sure he can listen to music so maybe if they have like
wrestlemania podcast or something because how old is he now because when we saw him in the
initial dog he's like 30 i think he's younger than. I want to say he's 34 off the top of my head.
Fuck.
He just had a birthday in October.
Yeah, 34.
I mean, basically being raised in prison.
We definitely also want to talk about your rap career,
but we discovered when we were coordinating this,
Brendan had a clip where he did stand-up on the spot with Jeremiah Watkins,
and they talked about who was smarter, Brendan Schaub or Brendan Dassey on the spot with Jeremiah Watkins. And they talked about who is smarter,
Brendan Ushab or Brendan Dassey on the clip.
And before we were all friends,
Brad dropped some bars on your page.
And I think someone actually blocked him on your page,
we discovered.
Oh, on your page?
Oh, it's fine.
I probably wasn't running my Instagram back then.
No, probably not.
So we got blocked.
But this is cool, though, because you're coming up.
He's rapping or what?
Yeah, there's some bars.
Do yourselves a favor
and shove the microphone
up each other's asses
and don't enjoy it too much.
Your jokes make me choke.
You're nothing but a chode.
Just kidding.
You wish your dick was thick.
You douchebags make me sick.
Oh, yeah, it's rapping.
Yeah, it's rapping.
Go jump on your mama's tit
and sit on her dick.
Yeah.
Fire.
Nick, you could have done
that way better, Nick.
Yeah, well, I...
Well, you put a beat to it?
You should space out the bars.
Yeah, you should.
Give him a beat.
So can we unblock him?
Yeah.
Yeah, we're all friends now.
Yeah, I got you, bud.
We're buddies.
That is...
Oh, shit.
I like that you go hard in the paint
for the fucking comments, though.
That's good. Yeah, that fucking comments. That's good.
Yeah, that's good.
That's good.
Rappers rap.
Rappers got to rap.
You won't stop rapping no matter what.
That's because you got it in you.
How's the rap life going, dude?
You got some shorties?
Yeah, I got some fans all over, which is great.
Yeah, I got some fans all over, which is great.
And I just want to say thank you guys for allowing me to be on your show.
Really appreciate it.
For sure.
And a lot of it is just, you know, everybody taking stabs at each other.
It's nothing fucking personal.
Unintended. So, you know, I didn't see any harm by that.
Oh, dude.
Did you want...
Trust me, at least in least my worries have you always
wanted to uh have you always wanted to be a rapper yeah actually uh in high school um i wanted to be
a radio guy oh okay everybody's like oh you got such a great voice for radio i can see that i can
see that and so uh i got into radio and then voiceover stuff. And then I was actually going to be building songs for voiceover, like music beds that I could talk over to use for videos.
And I'm like, well, fuck.
I just kind of came up with making beats.
And so I was learning the program to make the music bed.
Yeah, he does have a good voice.
I just kind of came up with a lot of hot beats over the years.
And I'm like, well, I've always kind of been a rap guy because Eminem is my all-time favorite.
I hope to meet him someday.
I met him.
I have this fucking crazy-ass dream that I'll do a song with him someday.
Oh, man, I would love it.
I could see that, yeah. That'd be sick. I've done a've done a song i don't think that'll ever happen but number one maybe
step one is uh is spaghetti maybe we can connect them oh he just said my uh maybe step one is uh
brad and jake smith oh yeah right we could. Yeah. We'll figure it out.
Figure it out.
I love music.
You basically said, call my agent.
That's what he just said.
What's that?
The music has been kind of an outlet for me.
That's cool, yeah.
Feelings and shit.
That's good.
When's the last song you made?
I've had a lot of haters just for no reason.
Well, bro, I mean, come on.
That's the internet.
Welcome to the party, bud.
Yeah, the comments, it didn't really mean anything.
No, no, no. We know, bro.
We know.
Oh, no, dude.
Don't worry about it.
Bro, the internet is not real.
Give us that song.
You're good.
We can tell you're a good guy.
Actually, it's a thing because, like, you know,
you see behind the guy who leaves a comment.
It's like everyone's a person.
So this is great.
But, yeah, this is cool.
Well, I'm glad that it's a, you a – it sounds like you're getting your feelings out there
and it's cathartic too, right?
Hopefully they get out.
Hopefully they get out.
Boy, yeah.
It's tough.
I actually thought they were going to let him out.
I actually thought that Brendan was out.
That's what I thought.
Yeah, that's what I thought.
Yeah, the news came out.
I thought they were letting Brendan out. Yeah. And then they put him back in or – Yeah, no. They were going And Brendan was out. That's what I thought. Yeah, that's what I thought. Yeah, the news came out. I thought they were letting Brendan out.
Yeah.
And then they put him back in, or?
Yeah, no, they were going to let him out.
And then there were a couple judges saying, hey, he should be out.
And then, obviously, shithole Wisconsin blocked it.
And I think they just do everything they can to block anything.
To keep him in there.
Yeah, they don't give a fuck, huh?
It's not about, like, anything but just, like, can to block anything. To keep them in there. Yeah, they don't give a fuck, huh?
It's not about anything but just like,
the decision's made, we don't want to be wrong,
fucking keep them in there.
Yeah, because they'll look bad.
Yeah, exactly.
Terrible.
Well, first of all,
I think that Kathleen Zellner wouldn't be wasting her breath all these years if she thought they were guilty.
Yeah.
She isn't going to fucking waste,
because she's doing this for free.
Okay, well, yeah, good point.
And that's the lady from the Innocence Project, right?
She's from Zellner Law Offices out of Chicago.
Oh, okay, okay.
Yeah, I don't think she's from the Innocence.
Okay, okay, okay.
I don't believe she is.
But they had gotten involved.
She told me the theory about Bobby way before
she went public with it.
I was pretty honored to even
be able to talk to her at all.
There's just a lot of shit that's
going on and I just want a
fucking normal life. I'm just a broke
asshole living in Wisconsin.
Well, you keep it through music.
That's your next song.
So Bobby's got to be
kind of shitting, huh?
Well, yeah, I think he is.
He's nowhere to be found on social media.
Everybody keeps asking me.
I want to tell everybody,
stop fucking asking me where Bobby is.
I don't know.
And we don't know where he's at. He's just gone.
Maybe you could do a follow-up to They Didn't Do It, Bobby Did It.
Well.
A diss track towards Bobby.
He could get sued.
Yeah.
Let's just.
Wow.
It's a song, right?
I mean, Biggie didn't sue Tupac after hit him up.
It's not street to sue.
It's not street to sue.
Yeah.
But they might sue, you know?
Well, I'll tell you, my half- half brother's mom barb uh she used to be
my stepmom when my real dad and my stepmom were together and so she was trying to get
restraining orders on me too because i was speaking out about bobby so it's like that's
why i say if that fucking family knows more, they should really come forward.
But it's not normal for a family to do all this stupid shit if they're fucking not guilty.
So nobody actually knows where Bobby is?
I don't know where he is.
I haven't seen him since the funeral.
Oh, wow.
Okay.
And at the funeral he was like this.
17, I think.
But what about the boyfriend?
I can remember.
What boyfriend?
Yeah, I don't know what you're talking about.
The original, the girl's boyfriend was like, I thought he was a suspect.
Oh, Ryan?
Yeah.
Are you talking about Ryan?
For one, okay, everybody thinks that he had her planner.
Well, it was just a fucking page that was printed off.
It wasn't an actual.
Yeah, they run with shit.
It's crazy.
They got to make it entertaining.
Wasn't there like a voicemail that was erased or something?
Well, I hope they figure it out, man.
Yeah, good luck, brother.
We appreciate you coming on.
Whatever music you make, send it to us.
We'll play it.
Yeah, Chris will post it on social media.
Yeah, do you guys want me to produce a little
music bed intro for you guys?
Oh, yeah, please. Of course.
We would love that. Yes. Chris will post it.
Maybe outro. I really love our intro.
Oh, our intro is really good.
Do something. We'll put it.
Yeah, an outro. I like an outro.
Yeah, I appreciate you, brother.
Have a good day. Keep up the good fight. Keep making beats.
Yeah, bro. Later, brother. Take a good day. Keep up the good fight. Keep making beats. Yeah, bro.
Yeah.
Later, brother.
Thank you.
Take care.
Thank you.
Appreciate your time.
See ya.
Okay, Brendan, the documentary was pro them.
Yeah.
No, no, no.
It was.
Yes, it was.
Yes, it was.
What the fuck are you talking about?
Was he saying it wasn't?
Yeah.
He was?
I was like, what are you talking about?
Well, you know, you cut in on the point.
The documentary was trying to get them out of jail.
Very pro them. Yes, yes. That's why they made the point. The documentary was trying to get them out of jail.
Yes, yes.
That's why they made the documentary.
That's why they made it.
That's why they made it.
But there's a follow-up to that.
Right.
They made it.
Because that's the controversy.
They want controversy.
So they made it to be like, they're innocent.
Now you're vibing.
Now you're vibing.
A major vibing.
I'm vibing.
This bitch is in jail for the rest of his life.
Yeah, no, no.
They just don't throw people in jail for the fuck of it.
I know, but that's...
There's a lot of evidence that he committed murder, like a ton more than we know.
I know, but we're talking to the guy.
We're not going to talk to the guy about that.
That's what I'm saying.
That's what I want to talk to him about, though.
Who gives a fuck?
I just want to get really deep into his rap career.
I do, too.
Yeah.
I like when Nick brought up me through that
hater comment oh oh chris goes good to put a face that people that look like that behind comments
i'm like that's exactly what i thought he looked like oh right right right were you guys standing
that close or are you no it's cut all right well yeah okay but i think for them, though, there's nothing.
Clearly, they're not getting out, dude, right?
But that's my whole point.
That documentary, the whole nation was captivated with this,
and it was like, get him out of jail, get him out of jail. And then you just Google it.
Just Google, like, what did they not show in the documentary?
Yeah, it's a lot.
And you see that, and you go.
Picture him with a knife stabbing him. Right it's like there was like dna there was
like all this stuff you just kind of go well what's going on but at the same time we're hearing
him talk about how it's half brothers and half this and half that so the dna could be all mixed
well it was mostly about steven avery which he was involved right he did do something about it
but we're talking about his half brotherbrother, which is a kid.
He has seven half-brothers.
Dude, when you watch that documentary and you see that kid just being like.
Yeah, that's crazy.
You're like, what are they doing?
That interview with him?
It was outrageous.
Right?
You can see the interview.
I don't want to tell him, but I had a cop come to my show.
And I was like, dude, that's fucked up.
But they did Steven Avery.
And he's like, dude, no, no.
The evidence they have on him it's clear as
day he goes but they don't tell you that
because they want to create controversy for views
but my point though is that
that's what I'm saying like
everybody got involved
that's why this is what I'm trying to tell you why
I don't care like documentaries mean nothing
no I know they don't yeah they're so one-sided
because it's like the whole nation was
captivated by this documentary yeah and it's they still in jail yeah I know they don't. Yeah, they're so one-sided. Because it's like the whole nation was captivated by this documentary.
Yeah, and it's –
They're still in jail.
Yeah, I know.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
I'll take a large fry with –
Yeah, I mean, dude.
There's so much evidence.
Yeah, but who knows?
No, who knows?
Who knows?
Who knows?
I haven't thought about that doc since he brought up his rap video.
Yeah.
You know, on to the next, you know? Well, good luck. You know what I mean? Good luck to his rap. I would love to see his rap video yeah it's you know move on to the next you know yeah
well good luck you know what i mean good luck to his rap dude i would love to see his rap
career take off dude i would love to see you two collab together man for once we'll get going yeah
we'll get going we'll do something no we're still going we got another one yeah
what's up golden hour chris brendan eric nick and whoever else is back there um so what's more cringe not exactly what's more cringe but is it cringe that i'll sometimes wait
around after the show walk around the venue until the comedians leave to try to catch a picture with them.
Yeah.
That's cool.
I got one with Chris and Ari Shaffir this weekend.
Oh, yeah.
That was just the other day.
Is that cringe?
No.
No, I think it's cool.
It's cool?
Oh, cool.
Wait, wait.
Hold on.
Let me think of where that was.
God, every place is the same.
Hey, look.
You know what, dude?
My leg's getting a little bigger.
Look at that quad popping out. Look at the quad popping out, though, right? Come on, look. You know what, dude? My leg's getting a little bigger. Look at that quad popping out.
Look at the quad popping out, though, right?
Come on, man.
You know, I look good.
I look good.
How about that camel toe
that we see right there?
How about that?
Yep, yep.
Those are my balls.
Hold on.
Where was that?
I remember that guy.
I actually remember that guy.
He was a fucking Sacramento.
Figured it out.
Tight move, man.
You guys wouldn't have figured it out.
No, you were just there.
It's crazy you remember that.
But this can be weird.
It depends on the venue.
It can be weird.
He wasn't weird.
It depends on the person.
You don't have a tour bus.
No.
Okay, so I was someplace with Matt Rife.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And he's got this tour bus.
I hate the tour bus.
I know, but then these people.
They're around the tour bus.
They're just waiting.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And it got a little weird. Right. You know? I mean, look. At people. They're around the tour bus. They're just waiting. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it got a little weird.
Right.
You know?
I mean, look.
At that level.
It gets weird.
But the thing is, it's like, here's the thing, though.
You have a meet and greet, right?
Yeah.
You charge?
And charge what?
Do you charge for a meet and greet?
I do.
Yeah.
VIP.
Okay, so that's what I'm saying.
So there's a VIP meet and greet.
People charge for it.
Yeah.
And then he's fucked.
Right, right, right.
I always do kind of feel bad
About like
They can't afford it
But if you
But you know what
Yes I do agree with you
Imagine you just spent
Spent a hundred dollars
And you got all your merch
And you just walk by
And you see
What
Yeah yeah yeah
Well
Doing it for free in the back
I have a thing though
Exactly
I have a thing though
If you catch me on the street
Fair game
Yeah you're right
You know what I mean
Daddy's not working
Because there are people Even if it's right afterwards,
but there are people who sneak into the meet and greet,
and they tell me, they're like, hey, I just snuck in.
And I'm like, oh, so you stole from me.
And everyone else paid, and you didn't.
That's shitty for all that.
He stole from me.
Do you still make a picture?
I mean, yeah.
What am I going to do?
I can't.
Dude, honestly, it's like, well, you beat the game.
You beat the system.
So it's like, all right, cool.
Kudos.
You know what I mean?
More power to you.
Yeah.
So you're saying it's the security's fault.
Is that better than the guy sneaking in the back of the venue?
No, that's better because he got me on my way out.
Because that's all fair game.
He waited.
Exactly.
He waited like probably an hour.
I think the guy that snuck in, that's more gangster. It's maybe more gangster. It takes more effort. It was a really little. Exactly. He waited like probably an hour. I think the guy that snuck in, that's more gangster.
It's maybe more gangster.
It was a really little.
It was in El Paso.
Wait, no.
It was in Sacramento, actually.
And it was a really.
You could say any city, right?
You know what?
You're 100% right.
And I get it.
Call him out.
And that's good.
Call him out.
And that's good that you said that. I appreciate it. And it's fine that it. Call him out. And that's good. Call him out. And that's good that you said that.
I appreciate it.
And it's fine that it was directed towards me.
I agree with you, okay?
And it happened.
And I will be in Vancouver and Kelowna.
Catch me on the streets.
I'm selling crazy tickets in Kelowna, by the way.
I don't even know what it is.
Kelowna, catch him on the street outside
in the back. No, don't.
You heard it here. Fucking goddammit.
Don't pay shit for that VIP.
It's already sold out.
Keep going.
Rochester. All the people that bought the VIP
now you know get refunds. Have you
guys ever played these places?
Keep going. Houston, Texas? No, no, yes, obviously.
Here we go. Durham? Have you done Corpus Christi christi no i haven't okay look at these i didn't even
fort wayne saginaw victoria bc augusta i've done chattanooga i've done yeah yeah okay all right
not too weird chrisley.com no not weird but they're weird ones coming up saginaw was the
one where i was like what is that yeah it Sounds like some mobster shit. It does, actually.
It does.
That's where they stay for the summer or something.
Right.
Anyway, crystalia.com.
If you want to go see them, it's at crystalia.com as well.
All right, kids.
Love you.
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Sometime in the early 80s,
REO Speedwagon's airplane made an unannounced middle-of-the-night landing.
This is my friend Kyle McLaughlin,
the star of Twin Peaks.
And he's telling me about how he discovered
a real-life Twin Peaks in rural North Carolina,
not far from where he filmed Blue Velvet.
What was on the plane was copious amounts of drugs
coming in from South America.
Supposedly, Pablo Escobar went looking for other spots,
quiet, out-of-the-way places to bring in his cocaine.
My name is Joshua Davis, and I'm an investigative reporter.
Kyle and I talk all the time
about the strange
things we come across, but nothing was quite as strange as what we found in Varnumtown,
North Carolina. There's crooked cops, brother against brother. Everyone's got a story to tell,
but does the truth even exist? Welcome to Varnumtown. Varnumtown is available
wherever you listen to podcasts.