The Golden Hour - Too Real
Episode Date: September 16, 2022FULL EPISODE: https://patreon.com/KATSPlus The guys talk the Be Real app, Hall & Oates, Cameron Hanes, Ontario, California being the bane of Chris' existence, the Scream "Requ...el", David Arquette, old dudes who age well, adult film prerequisites, all new KATS Confessions, the TV show Glee, anal beads., Micro Wrestling and much more!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Can you Google anal beads stuck and how many times that's happened like as you know, they're sure there's like, you know
Well, there has to be a limit to where it's just dangerous
What do you think a doctor is gonna be like?
You can't put a free ball
Eleven is the...
Doctor's like in my experience nine to ten
A free ball
It can't be just like a yeah
Oh no no
Shit we lost it
Yeah it's gotta be connected to
I knew you'd get my god
Sustained.
You ever met this guy?
Oh, I'm the dumb one.
You can't argue.
There's something about me.
You have no idea what you're saying.
Gang, gang.
Buzz, buzz.
Sure.
Yo, Eric, man.
Love you on Sports TV.
Brendan, dude, when are you coming to Wisconsin?
What's up?
I was just there.
That's a joke, right?
Yeah, he said, I hope you recognize my... Oh, gotcha.
I listened to Congratulations last week,
and I heard Calvin saying the F word.
Oh, yeah.
Kind of reminded me of a funny situation with my own kid.
Hey, dude.
What does Marshall have?
Fuck.
Fuck. Look at my shirt. I don't mind when kids cuss The way he
The way he did it
It was hilarious
He goes what does Marshall have
He goes
Fuck
And he knows he shouldn't have said it
Boston just started Something messed up in Boston And he knows he shouldn't have said it.
Boston just started his, his,
his something mess up in Boston.
Go.
God damn it.
Like that straight from me.
That kid kind of said that like he was standing outside his parents' bedroom
and heard his mom saying that during sex.
Oh,
that's where they get that.
That's funny.
That's where they get that.
He's just mimicking someone he heard say that.
Cause it just, cause it sounds like that. That's funny. That's where they get that. He's just mimicking someone he heard say that. Because it sounds like, fuck.
Yeah.
Fuck.
They don't know what they're saying.
Is this a swallow first?
Fuck.
What the fuck?
Yeah, what the fuck?
That's the only extra.
Yeah, so I don't know if he, I'm more concerned about where he heard that.
Dude, one time, this reminds me of one time.
I've told this on my podcast.
Congratulations.
Subscribe to Superstar Studios.
But I, you know, you watch porn sometimes.
I never, I used to watch porn, never watched porn for a long time.
And now I'm heavy in porn.
Yeah, hell yeah.
I love porn.
I watch porn.
What's your style?
It changes always.
It changes always.
Isn't that crazy?
Does the YouPorn algorithm ever just recommend transgender porn to you?
Brendan, we've got to talk about this after the episode.
Yeah, yeah.
We've got to have a conversation with you, and it's fine.
This is based off clicks, buddy.
My thing is, what gave you the impression?
It's based off clicks, Brendan.
That's what we're saying.
That's what we're saying.
Hey, YouTube, what gives you the impression
I want two big black things?
You know what I'm saying?
One five.
Because you're clicking around.
Wait, what was I?
You watch porn now.
Yes, I have that locked already.
That's right. But there was something else.
You want that?
Yeah, that's right.
Yeah, it always changes.
What do you like?
Like, do you ever get back into something that you were like you used to watching?
Like, let me try this again.
You know what I mean?
Like, whatever it is.
Like, Bukkake.
I'm not into Bukkake.
Like an old porno star.
I'm like, yeah, she's still doing it.
And I'm like, these old ones were good.
Let me get my dick out.
Yeah.
Yes.
But also, my brother's like, you know how I know you're gay?
Because me and Mark and Jay were talking about this in Wisconsin.
Like, I won't watch a porn unless there's a big dick in it.
I don't know if that's gay, but it's a small dick.
I need a big dick. You're not sure if it's gay? I don't think a porn unless there's a big dick in it. I don't know if that's gay, but it's a small dick. I need a big dick.
You're not sure if it's gay?
I don't think it's gay.
If the prerequisite for your porn is if you're starting with the dick, I mean.
Not me, bro.
Hey, hold on.
Hey, hold on.
You know, I know you have a small dick.
I like to make sure it's my, you know what I'm saying here?
No, you got to find it.
Your dick is,
honestly, you have one of those dicks
that's fucking bigger when it's soft
than when it gets hard, it shrinks.
That'd be a nightmare.
That'd be hilarious.
That'd be a nightmare.
So soft, it's down here,
and then it just gets hard like this.
It's like Ant-Man,
like just fucking.
It gets smaller.
When it gets turned on.
This is so powerful.
You want to pretend that that's your dick.
I mean, it's a good thing to have.
I'll tell you right now, I like small dick porn.
I like all the dick porn.
So you watch Asian porn?
I watch all of it.
I don't care.
No offense, Chintz.
I can get into it if it's small.
It's funny, dude.
I'm like, ah, this fucking guy.
Let's have fun.
Oh, I'm not there to laugh, though, you know?
I'm there to do work, Daddy.
Because I got kids beating down the door.
All right. So I got kids beating down the door. So, all right.
So, all right.
So, I was in a...
So, you know, you watch porn.
And sometimes you just...
Well, I would just close a computer.
I was in my 20s.
I would just close a computer.
And then sometimes I would take my computer out to, like, fucking coffee shops and write shit, you know?
And so, I jerked off.
And I fucking...
And I closed the thing. And then I... Maybe a day later, even, I went to Starbucks. I fucking and I closed the thing
and then I
maybe a day later even
I went to Starbucks
I brought my computer
and I opened it
and I opened it to
like literally
when I opened it
it went
oh yeah
and I just closed it
like immediately
just like
okay well
we got to deal with this
and so and it said full volume oh it was yeah it was and so I'm like Like immediately Just like Okay well we gotta deal with this And so
And it said full volume
Oh it was
Yeah it was
And um
And so I'm like
Well
I actually don't give a fuck
Like
They
I know they
But I don't want other people
To be embarrassed
Like I don't care
I'd be like
Hey guys I watch porn
Like I don't give a fuck
I don't sweat
Oh you guys don't watch porn
Yeah yeah yeah
Shut the fuck up
But like I don't want people
To feel uncomfortable right
So like
I'm like how do I do this I can't leave because then they know ah that guy's a bitch like fucking so
i got to figure out how to stay here and be comfortable about it so um i had to jerked off
there i go like this i go like the fucking volume like that but then i realized if you're ever in
that situation and here's what i want to do here's what i'm gonna tell you guys i'm gifting you this
knowledge because you know i went through. You don't have to.
Take the earbuds,
stick it in,
and then open it up, dude,
and you just get it in there.
It's the king and the sting.
Back up in the sting.
I just got a call
that said they want to end the ring.
They got me working OT all night long.
How many times I got to make this song?
Hey, hold on, what is this?
Now y'all wanna switch?
Y'all just added Stevie and Eric and now y'all adding Chris?
How's that gonna fit?
Wait, I get the gist
I just probably have to slow it down and hit it like this
It's the king, the wing, and the sting
It's the wing and the king and the sting
Hold on, hold on
Hold on, wait a minute, let me think
It's the king and the sting and the wing
Let's go
King and the sting and the wing
Brought it full circle and put on the whole team.
Legendary trio, Brittany, Chris, and Theo.
What you mean?
You know it's the King and the Sting and the Wing.