The Greatest Generation - Emergency Modelo (VOY S6E25)
Episode Date: November 6, 2023When Voyager cuts power to drop off a mysterious passenger, Neelix gets field promoted to storyteller for the li’lest Borgs. But when the details of his tale don’t hold up under scrutiny, there’...s no way to know whether the spooky stowaway was real. What are the rules of a regulation power hour? Where are morning margaritas allowed? How do you translate fucked up on scotch to fucked up on Topo Chico? It’s the episode that’s seeing Voyager in a different light!Support the production of The Greatest Generation.Friends of DeSoto for Democracy.Friends of DeSoto for Justice. Friends of DeSoto for Labor.Follow The Game of Buttholes: The Will of the Caretaker!Music by Adam Ragusea & Dark MateriaFollow The Greatest Generation on Twitter, and discuss the show using the hashtag #GreatestGen!The Greatest Generation is on YouTube.Facebook group | Subreddit | Discord | WikiSign up for our mailing list!Get a thing at podshop.biz!
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Hey Portland, we know you get made fun of a ton, that you're a hipster paradise that's
all IPAs and overpriced heritage workwear and vegan strip clubs, but we know what you
really are, a big old city full of nerds.
And what the nerds love?
Star Trek Jigs.
That's why we're bringing the Sherry Rebarishment Tour to the Alberta Rose Theater this week.
That's right, we're coming back to walk over your bridges, admire your stumps, wear your
nikes, and in return give you an evening full of belly laughs about Star Trek V, the final
frontier.
November 16th at one of our favorite venues to perform at.
So put down your mug of pour over, get off your vintage couch, hop on your fixie, and
come to the Share Your Embarrassment Tour.
Ticket's still on sale at GreatestGenTour.com.
Captain Captain Brindan where the U.S. says 4 of it. Do it Captain.
Welcome to the greatest generation.
It's a Star Trek podcast by a couple of guys.
It's a little bit embarrassed about having a Star Trek podcast.
I'm Adam Pranica.
I'm Ben Harrison.
Not only is this a Mornhammer, but we are looking at each other during.
Had to do it.
Had to break out the big faces for this one.
Ha ha ha ha.
Peek behind the pot.
It's two in the afternoon.
Dozens of friends of DeSoto watching here
in the studio audience.
They've been advised to be utterly silent.
More than hammered episode.
It's been a long time since we've done one of these
classic power hour rules.
Yeah.
A shot of your favorite si and beverage, either a porch
beer or a or a seltzer or or what have you. Shot of that every 60 seconds. It equals
what? Like just over six beers. I think just over five. Okay. It's just over six. That's
a lot. I mean, we'll see if we're getting the home poor here for Benjamin, our hairs.
Well, unlike past power hours, friends of DeSoto have been kind enough to send along shot
glasses.
Ben, what are we drinking?
Okay.
So I brought out a couple of Madelo espaceals, and then I brought out some Topo Chico
hard-seltzers in an assorted pack of different flavors.
Is it a regulation power hour if we switch drinks,
midway through, do you know?
We're in communication with the board
as we speak about that.
Oh yeah, much like the Markis of Queensberry
regulation surrounding boxing,
there is a sanctioning body that overseas power hours.
And yeah, I think they're kind of in deliberations right now. and surrounding boxing. There is a sanctioning body that oversees power hours.
And yeah, I think they're kind of in deliberations right now.
I did a power hour back in the day in college.
I've probably told this story where we thought it would be fun
to try it with B to the E, which was,
I think this is basically the same era as for loco.
Bud Weiser had a energy drink combined with a beer as a beverage. It didn't last
very long on the market and we didn't last very long doing it in a power hour. We stopped the power
hour after like two of them because we were feeling crazy. Yeah, so it was the energy portion of that
beverage that that cooked you, right? It wasn't the beer part. Yeah, but I don't think that the
that cooked you, right? It wasn't the beer part.
Yeah, but I don't think that the hard celtzer
is gonna hit the same way.
Here, I'm gonna, what I'm gonna do,
we're just gonna do like a little experiment
and see if some of this topochico hard celtzer
displaces the same amount of air in your shot glass
as it does mine, just to make sure things are fair.
All right, so Ben has poured a shot of Topo Chico exotic pineapple flavor
into my cyber security command shot glass. And now I will attempt to pour that into Ben's
my death Valley national park shot glass. Two shot glasses that couldn't look any more I'm going to go ahead and do this. This is just a bonus shot, are we starting? That's just a bonus to get out of the way.
Okay.
Exotic pineapple.
I would say, you know, you ever get the Trader Joe's trail mix
that sometimes come with the dried pineapple?
A little, yeah.
It tastes like more dried pineapple than fresh pineapple,
which means I'm planning on shooting dried ropes later.
I'm going to go ahead and, which means I'm planning on
shooting dried ropes later.
My favorite kind.
Mmm, chewier.
The game of buttholes, the will of the caretaker, is our boss today.
We cannot resist.
It's awesome power.
So let's get into a bit. I'm scared personally.
It's Star Trek Voyager Season 6 episode 25, a spooky episode, and a spooky way to do it for us.
The haunting of Deck 12.
We've got something a little bigger in your torpedo tubes, I'm not turning around.
We start this episode on the same opening shot as two episodes ago. The episode entitled
Fury with Jennifer Leane had the exact same effect shot as the opener on this one.
I think spooky music does a lot to set the tone here, right?
Right. It is creepy music. It's the only thing they changed.
Neelix, I don't think anyone would say is the bravest character on Star Trek
Voyager, but he's legitimately freaked out here.
Yeah, he's just like rearranging the furniture in the in the restaurant, but he is doing it with
such great trepidation. Isn't it true though that every workplace becomes scary
after hours and in the dark?
There's no happiness to a daytime workplace
that would supersede how scary it would become.
Were there to be no one in it and for it to be dark, right?
That's true. Yeah.
You and I are both people that have had to be at the office
on an overnight or babysitting
an upload or a render or whatever.
And that is genuinely upsetting time to be spending.
The idea here is that they're preparing to shut down main power.
And this is a rare occurrence on the ship as well.
Everyone's a little bit on edge because of that.
Yeah.
He goes to open the door and there's, there's a Borg, right there.
Oh, it's just seven of nine.
We'll be shutting down main power soon.
The children's regeneration cycle will be interrupted.
They'll require supervision.
Well, I'm happy to help.
I love how seven's constantly trying to lay off
the littleless Borg's under someone else.
She hates this job.
Nelix is great with kids though.
This is a skill, like she talks about how his,
like on his resume, on his curriculum, Vite,
he has babysitting experience.
So he's going to be looking after the Lola's Borg's
while this shutdown occurs.
And she's like, she's trying to like give him outs,
which I appreciate it. She's like, it's trying to like give him outs, which I appreciate it.
She's like, it's gonna take a while.
Like this could be like a long thing,
and he's like, no, no, no, I got you.
He's like, I'm Nielix.
What else do I have to do?
To tell you the truth, I'd be grateful for the distraction.
Another thing that is discussed here
is whether or not the kids know what's happening.
We gotta go to the bridge to find out
where we see the order to cut the engines so that
the Voyager can float into the filthy space but hold it ahead.
It's a space but hold from a home that has not installed a $60 bidet attachment to their
toilet. I noticed you're picking up your broads.
I too will be partaking in some broads today.
Keep my birdie functional.
These minutes are already feeling
like they're coming very fast
and we're only four of them in.
How are we already onto our second can?
What's going on?
Oh, because these are 12 answers, I guess.
But, oh, and I should say we're splitting cans here.
So, it's not, we have an each hat an entire can.
Right.
All right.
Well, that's reassuring.
I feel like two-vux juvenile imaginations line of dialogue should be pulled for a line
and then used on us throughout the rest of our run of greatest gender.
What do you see, Tuvac?
Two star fleet officers with juvenile imaginations.
Come on, Tuvac.
So once Powers cut,
you notice all these lanterns that have been set up around the bridge.
This is like, I don't know if you ever grew up in hurricane country,
but when one's about to hit,
you tape up your windows, you break out the
lanterns and the flashlights. You make sure your tub is dry in case you get a get in or
store water.
Oh, yeah, I thought you filled the tub up. I guess it just depends. Like, if you're going
to get hit by a wind storm, the tub might be shelter, but if you're just planning on a long power or utility outage, you got to use that tub for for wooder.
We, uh, we only have the one tub at my house because we're a one bathroom household.
That's a terrible that that continues to horrify me.
It's a real Sophie's choice. Do we do we store water or do we leave it empty as a place to take shelter?
I love that as we're cutting around scenes on the ship, as the power goes out, we get to
see a lot of the scenes we're so familiar with in a different light.
But I think one aspect that is like maybe unintentionally cruel is that no one has told
the Lil' List Borgs and they get to find out by being jolted from their alcove once it
shuts up.
Everything's alright, we just had to shut down main power temporarily.
Nothing to be concerned about.
Because they were like mid recharge cycle when the power was shut down.
But like, yeah, like they could have been warned before.
No one told them to like go to bed early
to get extra charge.
It sucks.
Do we know what happens if you don't regenerate?
Do you die?
I mean, that's what happened to my fitness tracker watch
yesterday.
I forgot to regenerate it.
And by one big walk of the day, the battery failed.
And I got no credit for it, no credit.
Man, you just walked different.
Your watch is constantly like, have you fallen?
Have you gotten into a car accident?
Yeah.
It's always like offering to call the authorities
on my behalf.
So instead, they're gonna be up and their,
Nielux has kind of set up like a,
almost like a campfire type situation for them.
They're gonna be sitting in a circle doing activities.
He's even got a flotter novel for them to,
I guess listen to him read.
I mean, as many questions as we have about this,
each of has even more.
And with two old for flotter, let's be fair.
Without his brother around to ask these questions
of Neelix will have to do.
But you gotta imagine like,
like were each of's brother to be. But you gotta imagine like like were E-tips rather to be just brothers like hey
Stone away on the ship. I'm over here on the other side of the cargo page. What's up guys?
Why'd you kill the power?
It's somehow worse to be squeegee-ing
sewage when you can't see the sewage
to be squeegeeing sewage when you can't see the sewage. Also, who knew that that was a job on Voyager, but somehow it is.
They're beaming it out to somewhere.
Most people have a problem with nepotism.
Sewage nepotism? The worst guy!
Hey, Egypt!
I don't want this job.
Neelix is doing that thing where his cover ups are leaving things on coverage.
Like they're doing more damage
than solving the problem here.
Kids, they wanna know the why.
You know, when you said a rule,
a kid wants to know why it's a rule.
And if it's just arbitrary, that's gonna be inherently dissatisfactory to a kid, I
think.
The kids have heard about something that may be a haunting on Deck 12, Section 42.
Rumors have been swirling from the one other kid on the ship. Also swirling the sewage around the drain
at which each of his brother works.
I found a drain!
How come the only number comes over and talks to me?
Is it because I reek of raw sewage?
Did you see one of the the Borgs twins spike the camera here?
Oh, I missed that.
It was pretty blatant.
I want to see those guys talk to Naomi Wildman about like, hey, we got pretty similar love,
you know?
Not the same, but it's like, not far off.
Yeah.
Naomi's only interested in playing with adults.
Yeah.
I also noticed that Miss Ni, the little girl,
she is doing something that is very new adjacent
with her voice, especially like when she says
like a round vowel, like she says ghosts,
exactly the way a new in aliens would say ghosts.
Uh-huh.
If it's not a ghost, what is it?
Like when, when, when,
she's kind of skater boying her dialogue,
like when Newt says they mostly come at night, mostly,
mm-hmm.
Mizati says ghosts just like that.
Mercy.
I was wondering if that was like a like if she let Newt
inspire her performance a little bit.
How could you not?
Newt is one of the foundational science fiction,
horror, child's performance is ever spooky children. Yeah, do borgs get goose bumps
I think that's the least of their problems
Like as an assimilated person
starts to take stock of the weird sensations their body is giving them
I think maybe the goosebumps would fall pretty low on the list. Yeah, and in addition to this, I'm also a little cold. All right
They talk Nielix into telling them the story of what's really going on because they're concerned that there may be a genuine haunting going on aboard the ship and he launches
into a back before the four of you were even aboard Voyager.
We had this other adventure and here's what happened. We went into this
nebula. Like he never says a nebula not unlike this one or like on a night just like tonight.
This could be a large-marge story that he decides not to give it that sort of embellishment.
Every time I was expecting a large-marge zig, and he looks zagged in a way that really
frustrated me. He's like, you're never going to believe this kids, but on that night the mess hall was filled.
People were enjoying the Leola roots. He recalls a time where he was very nervous
and had a conversation about how other people were nervous and not him.
Mr. Neelix, are you certain it's not you who was on edge?
Nielix, not good at any sort of cover-ups here.
Yeah, and Tuvak is not trying to suit him.
Like the restaurant is bumpy while they're going through this nebula.
The bersard collectors are scooping up, deuterium left and right.
You know what Neelix is doing?
He's doing that thing where I asked the cab driver in Toronto
how he's feeling about the cab.
He's projecting his anxiety to other people
in order to make it clear that this is an anxious moment for him.
He really is.
He's like, how are you feeling about all the bangers, Tubak? Do you think the tires are going to make it to the Pearson airport? Tubak's just
fine, but he sees right through this. Yeah. Oh, have we switched flavors? We have switched
flavors. I forgot to call it out. We are now on the can-to of strawberry guava flavor.
You know, it's amazing. I had not noticed. It's just like the implication
of sweetness without any like specificities surrounding it. I had a celture on the golf
course yesterday. I have a bunch of out out of town friends visiting. We had a fun golf
day yesterday. We got celture from a brewery we had not had before and it was strawberry Celter.
Weird.
But the strawberry flavor was exactly like the good humor strawberry shortcake bar.
Whoa.
Which might sound disgusting to most people.
It was amazing.
Wow.
That is such a specific strawberry flavor.
That is really specific.
I know exactly what you're talking about.
I never thought I wanted a drink out of that, but I do.
A spiked, good humor strawberry milkshake would be a fun adult milkshake.
Are we spiking ice cream yet?
Yeah, there's spiked milkshakes anyways.
You got to liquid it down, huh?
Yeah, for consumption.
Yeah. I think that alcohol lowers the freezing point of stuff
or something.
Is this the jello shot effect?
Like, things stop being solid when you put alcohol in them?
Yeah.
I mean, that explains my dick. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha Hey, cheers to that, buddy. He looks tris to slip on past the goalie here.
He's like, yeah, so like the Bessard collectors
were putting out all this native animation
and it was destabilizing the nebula.
And he chaps like, bullshit, I call bullshit,
the story's fake.
Each of his brothers is like, I also call bullshit.
Actually, that's because I'm standing in shit
Actual shit. I'm yeah, I'm squeegeeing bullshit, which is are there bulls aboard? Where did you get this?
It's scared Nielix then it scares Nielix now. He's shook. He's never gotten over this
He's not a crook son. He's just a shook one and
He's never gotten over this. He's not a crook son.
He's just a shook one.
And, uh, yeah, so they're talking about how...
It's not the worst thing that happened to the Tlaxian home world.
I think we both know that, right?
It's weird how this even makes his list.
Does Nielix have anything good to say about things that happened on Tlax?
You know, we make a lot of fun on Nielix, and for good reason, he's a boob.
But he has been traumatized by many, many things.
And we haven't even gotten to one of his many things.
But this nebula is not reacting well to them taking all of the deuterium out of it,
but they've gotten 80% of what
they came for. And it's enough to get them thousands of light years. So they decide to
call it for the day and they bug out, but they get zapped right on their way out of the
nebula. Some some warf lightning hits the ship. It penetrates the hole.
Yeah, the punctuation on this ghost story is that there's a stowaway now, based on these bangers in this dirty space
butthole.
You see like the exterior of the ship with worth lightning,
like creeping around it.
I really feel Nelix here.
He just wants to fucking tell a story.
And these kids will not shut up.
The ship is having a bunch of strange malfunctions.
Chico Tay visits Janeway in the
ready room, and we get a cool POV here, right? Because we're inside the replicator, and
Janeway is just trying to make a cup of coffee.
This special effect was so cool. Yeah. Because they go from like digital cylinder of coffee
that is replicated without its container to actual coffee splashing all
over the replicator.
Yeah.
It looked great.
What would life be like for you if you could make coffee in any scenario?
That's sort of what it's like to live on Voyager.
Like you could pull off during any walk, anywhere, and get coffee.
As long as you had the credits, right?
I guess are we still running
a replicated credit economy on the ship?
With all this deuterium, they just picked up.
There was coffee in the nebula, I want to assume.
Chicoote does not have good news
about how widespread the damage is.
The answer, extremely wide.
And while you're taking that shot,
I'll update people on the flavor we're drinking.
It is now tropical mango flavor.
Oh, this tastes like a candle store to me.
I remember getting a pack of these multiple flavors
of Topo Chico hard-seltzers in the past
and finding that like I thought three of them were pretty good
and one of them was pretty vial.
And Topo Chico is like the strip club of flavors.
Like it's it's three pretty ones and one ugly one, right?
Yeah.
These minutes are flying by too fast.
I can't keep up.
I hate this flavor.
I fucking.
Okay, we got to get through it.
Topo Chico company.
I'm looking at you.
I'm looking at you right now.
I'm looking at the camera.
Tropical mango is tropical garbage. Yeah, I'm looking at the camera. Tropical mango, it's tropical garbage.
Yeah, take it back to the fucking drawing board,
Topo Chico Company, which I believe is the Coca-Cola Company.
Oh, so they do some things, right?
Like Mexican Coke.
This is two Celtery, it's bubble-throding us.
This is awful.
Wendy is going to quit after this.
I'm so sorry.
There's no bubble filter in audition.
Whoa.
You know how bad this is.
We need to switch to Madelo.
Emergency Madelo.
Emergency Madelo.
Hey, YouTube.
Switch to Madelo.
This mango tastes like shit!
And I would know!
You know, there's a lot of mango,
topochico, purple and up out of this pipe!
And I can tell!
Alright, so Chico Te and Janeway go out on the bridge
and Janeway's like, hey everybody remember this guy? Chico Te, Janeway go out onto the bridge and Janeway's like, hey, everybody remember
this guy?
Chico Te, he's the first officer.
Anyways, I'd like to introduce you to a man I'm stringing along.
Like the camera goes down to his face.
He's just like snaps his pencil.
I love the shot of Paris looking back at them
while the ship goes to work.
It's like turning around to yell at the kids,
like we're not there yet,
but accidentally stepping on the accelerate.
Paris is like turning around during doggie.
You're missing what's happening on the discovery channel,
Tom Paris. Ooh, that beer is delicious.
Just everything is going wrong on this ship.
Like it's doing things they're not asking for, it's telling them people are places when
they didn't ask for where people are.
Here's a question, what's the scariest thing?
Is it things not working when you need them to or things doing things because they choose to happen spontaneously?
I would say the second when the ship goes to warp, that seems crazy and scary and the worst. Yeah, you could just go right through a
fucking quasar if you're not careful. Yeah, I don't like that at all. No one can stop the ship either, and that's really bad news. It's terrible news. Also, no one can stop the elevator that Chicoote gets on and like starts plummeting.
How?
They showed us.
They showed you that the show didn't have the budget to show Chicoote bouncing around
in the turbo lift.
They did that on TNG, right?
I know, but Voyager doesn't have TNG money.
It sure does.
Also, give Chicoote something to do.
Bounce him around the turbo lift. That sure does. Also give Chico Tei something to do. Bounce him around the turbo lift.
Sounds great. Have Chico Tei sit down to write something with a pencil and the pencil snaps
itself without him doing it. What I love is how pissed Chico Tei is. Yeah, when he hates this,
when he gets to engineering, he, he doubles barrels Bologna professionally. Do you have any idea
what's going on? I know you don't want to do it.
Do it.
Coffee, black, make it yourself.
I'm trying to help you see this as an opportunity to grow.
Make it yourself.
One thing that doesn't happen here that drove me fucking nuts is, hey, can we shut down
all the turbo lifts until we figure out what's happening?
Chico-Tee doesn't say that.
Chico-Tee is like, the turbo lift I just got out of is free to fuck anyone else up
That it wants. I'm finally free of it. I
Don't give a fuck. I didn't think that was cool at all. You got to shut them down
You can't have crazy elevators taking people to your restaurant
They'll be too nauseous when they get there
people to your restaurant they'll be too nauseous when they get there. If your elevator can't handle more than two people at a time it's too dangerous to have in
your winery shut it down. He doesn't shut it down. He doesn't shut it down. I was
gonna say when Boimler had to clean up. You miss 100% of the shut it down, you don't shut down.
That's my year, but, quote.
I think Wayne Gretzky said that, right?
We are at the point of the...
We're at the 30 minute point, basically,
and we're talking through the moments
where we need to take a shot
and having to take two shots like hard back to back.
It's very, very challenging.
There is no temperature of modello that isn't better than mango topo chico.
These are pretty cold.
I thought to put them in the fridge last night.
I had a person last night.
I've got a house full of people right now.
This is why I'm here.
We were a household that freezes our peanut butter M&Ms.
They're delicious that way.
But a friend of ours came over and was like,
have you ever microwaved your peanut butter M&Ms?
And I looked at her like she was fucking insane
because that's an insane idea.
Why would I want to put a potentially molten amount of peanut butter into my mouth?
I am here from the past to tell you that microwaving peanut butter M&M's slaps.
Anyway, she takes our frozen peanut butter M&M's, puts them in the microwave and nukes them.
They are as she described, delicious.
However, why would you ever want to risk
a molten peanut butter M&M
when the safety of a frozen M&M is always delicious?
It's never gonna hurt you.
Yeah, I really relate to this because
over the weekend, our across the street neighbor came over
with burritos that she'd made.
She'd made like a mess of burritos.
You know this person? We've like interacted like five or six times since we moved in.
And you've been here how long? Since, since 2020.
You don't like surprise barbecue. How did you feel about surprise burritos?
It was an interesting experience because I was in the middle of like kind of an intense argument
with my wife. Oh, God. And this neighbor does not know.
She does not know what she's walking into.
She knocked on her front door at like 11.45 AM.
Pissed drunk.
Whoa.
And she had come over to drop off.
Can you describe how you know this?
Because like she kept hugging us.
Oh, no. And you
could smell the like marks on her. She had morning marks. She had morning marks and was
dropping off burritos. The only place to have morning marks is Mexico. I don't believe
you can do that here. I don't know how she did it, but she did it. Do you think she got drunk and decided to make neighbor burritos?
Or was she involved in the making of neighbor burritos?
And she's like, you know what makes batch food making better?
Just a good buzz.
I don't know.
Because I like that, especially around the holidays.
Like when you're in the kitchen working all day
on a large format meal, hell yeah, take it to the dome.
A previous interaction we had was my wife often makes
like holiday cookies and we take them around all the neighbors.
And she reciprocated with holiday tamales
a couple of years ago.
And I think that was like the last time
we had like a big interaction with her.
So a precedent has been set that occasionally
we will trade a food item.
Anyways, she's a nice lady.
She was day drunk in the middle of an argument
and we'd just gotten back from starting this argument
at brunch.
You started at brunch, drove home, where the best arguments begin.
Yeah, and she drops off these burritos.
There's such a sharpness to like, Mojito angry.
Not Mojito, what am I thinking of?
What's the Margarita egg?
What's the breakfast orange juice and champagne? Why did I call it mojito?
Jesus. I'm really hooked up. That's you said orange juice and cocaine. I was. Did I say orange juice
and champagne? Or did I say orange juice and cocaine? You said orange juice and champagne. I started
googling orange juice and cocaine. Trying to find out what that's called. So that's where we're at. Hey, what is orange juice and cocaine called?
Not a screwdriver because that's already taken. Orange Julius from Pope Viction. Anyways,
the reason I started living on this story was I microwaved one of her burritos to heat
it up last night for dinner.
Uh-huh.
And I microwaved it way too long and I got molten interior of burrito and burned my tongue.
And then I was like, God, I am burning the shit out of my tongue on this burrito.
And I keep, like it's cooled down and I'm still burning my tongue.
And then I realized it's also a 10 out of 10 spicy burrito,
like Thai food spicy.
She made a spicy-ass burrito.
Why did she do that?
That doesn't sound like a kindness.
I mean, it tastes good.
It's like Thai food, I like it.
She let the spiciness get away from her though.
Yeah, I think, you know, if you're a little sauce
in the kitchen and you're kind of like
tossing in amounts of chili pepper,
you might be forgiven for underestimating
how spicy you just made it.
Maybe she was hurting and she wanted you to hurt too.
That had crossed my mind.
They've got a gel pack problem on Voyager. Yeah, Deck 13's got
a bunch of burned out gel packs according to readings that they're getting in engineering. So
BLT and Chico Tego to look into that. And meanwhile, we get a little cameo from a previous lower decor on Voyager.
Cruman Sellas, step away from the control panel.
Did I do something wrong?
I have said on the record before, angry,
bejoring woman is my type.
I gotta say clumsy bejoring woman.
Also my type.
I expected her to die in this episode because when you get...
Why bring her back if you're not gonna kill her?
When you get a follow-up episode with a
Bedjorn lower dacker, usually that's their ass.
But it is only her ass in so much as
Seven of Nine is yelling at her a bunch.
The thing that sucks about being a fuckup constantly
is that people constantly expect you to be the reason of the fuckup.
Yeah, and she has like literally just shown up and like pulled the casing off of something
in a wall that she's working on. And set of nine like barges around a corner is like,
you fuck this shit up. And she's like, what? I just got.
So they're inspecting the jail packs and BLT and Jocote don't see anything wrong with them. And BLT, what she does detect is some sort of discharge moving around the ship.
It's not just in one spot.
She's like, this must be the work of Harry Kim.
Something about it reminds me of being in the womb.
Get out, Harry.
Who are you?
Harry Kim.
Parents must be very proud.
Who are you?
They come as come as a pair. Who are you?
Harry Kim, who else is she supposed to get chummy with? Harry Kim and your mom.
Very proud. Who are you? Harry Kim. I lasted 22 minutes.
Harry Kim. Harry Kim.
Ordinarily it seems like he would be the cause.
But she's traced this discharge to an area outside cargo bay, too.
You know what cargo bay, too, is that's sevens cargo bay.
And this creature has moved into that room.
And then there's some nebular gas.
It gets lead in.
And she can't call the bridge for help.
She can't leave because the door won't open.
This is really scary stuff.
And did you know there's an emergency switch
in the cargo bay, like an alien switch,
mm-hmm.
To open that door.
Jority and the doctor used that in TNG
to put out a plasma fire one time.
I remember that.
Seven uses it to open the door to the hallway though.
I feel like, but a lot of good that does.
She gets into the hallway and there's like,
put her on force fields.
Yeah, and then the warflightening goes right into her dolphin.
She gets taken down by this.
Neelix's lantern goes out, really freaks the kids out
and he's like, oh yeah, like I really should have thought
of that before the all system shut down like replacing the batteries on my lantern would have been like
job one actually.
They gave me a line on my wet mop.
It's actually on the stick.
This is a kind of mop where the amount you use it charges up the battery.
It's like a watch with an automatic movement.
Pretty cool!
The thing about this wet mop is they never want me to stop working.
I've got to get that.
Lock them, put your laptop number your mouth.
I've got to get that.
Lock them or not, it's just a gold.
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What is up people of the world?
Do you have an argument that you keep having with your friends and you just can't seem
to settle it and you're sitting there arguing about whether it's Star Trek or Star Wars
or you can't decide what is the best nut or can't agree on what is the best cheese?
Stop doing that!
Listen to me got this with Mark and Hal and only on Max Fun.
Your topics ask and answer objectively, definitively, for all time.
So don't worry, everybody.
We got this.
We got this.
Hey, Sydney, you're a physician and the co-host of Saubone, some Aertel Turf, Miss Guy,
de Medicine, right?
That's true, Jessen.
Is it true that our medical history podcast is just as good as a visit to your primary
care physician?
No, Jessen, that is absolutely not true.
However, our podcast is funny and interesting and a great way to learn about the medical
misdeeds of the past as well as some current not-so-legit healthcare fats.
So you're saying that by listening to our podcast, people feel better.
Sure.
Isn't that the same reason that you go to the doctor?
Well, you could say that.
And our podcast is free.
Yes, it is free.
You heard it here, first folks.
Saul Bones, Marlter, Miss Guy, the medicine,
right here on Maximum Fund, just as good as going to the doctor.
No, no, no, still not just as good as going to the doctor,
but pretty good.
It's up there.
One, two, three.
Stop it, you're doing it.
Do it.
Do it.
Do it.
Do it.
Do it.
Do it. Do it. Do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, section that is like force fielded in and then there's the the nebular gas inside of that.
I love to how willing Tukote was to just shoot at a panel. Yeah, fire apart then. Yeah, he says.
Tukote doesn't give a shit. He's not doing anything on the show at this point. He doesn't care
what he has to destroy. No, he'll do it. There's like piles and piles of Dixon Taikon, Derogas in a cargo base somewhere. Yeah. And he is not slowed down.
Maybe the craziest scene in this episode happens in the mess hall.
We're like, again, it's unusually full of patrons.
And also Harry Kim. And when the power flickers there,
Harry Kim is somehow the ranking person in the mess hall and tell us everyone to man their posts.
Yeah, like like treat this as a red alert, go to your stations,
Nelix, that means you stay here.
I promise you.
I've never been more certain of this in my life.
If I'm in the mess hall and Harry Kim orders me to do something, I'm not doing it.
Fuck you, Harry Kim.
And Ensign doesn't tell me what to do.
Like is this just kind of like a overall low ranked ship?
Like it kind of seems that way.
Like Harry Kim feels like like one of the highest status
bridge officers at this point.
Hey, Harry Kim, you know what you're in charge of?
Push.
He was stating the obvious again.
You're not in charge of me.
I love how Nielix is like, hey, where do I go?
And Harry Kim is like, right here.
I don't have time to talk to you about that Nielix.
I gotta go crush some babes. So, um, yeah. He's going to go figure out what's
going on. Neelix is going to stay behind. But like the lights go out around Neelix in
a really fun way. Like everyone leaves the mess hall and Neelix is left alone in the
dark. Fuck you, Nielix.
On the bridge, it's getting hot, man.
I really like the moment on the bridge where Janeway starts talking to the ship
in a personified way.
I'm going to get close to the mic for this. Yeah.
This is a lot like the Janeway that we're familiar with who wants to blow up the ship.
Hmm.
But this time she's like, Hey, do you think you could do me a
salad? Maybe bring a couple of systems back online?
Just for me?
Just one or two.
Maybe the coffee system and another system.
Like I don't care which one, but as long as the coffee
system is one of them, that's good.
And Paris is like, hey, I've got navigation back.
There's coffee and talking to Voyager.
Paris is rewarded with war-flightening to the face.
And his face looks like fucking burger.
He is really bad.
He looks really fucked up, and it looks like it's very painful. I thought
Paris looked a lot like a guy, a certain someone who stayed at his post. What rises to the
level of being cradled in someone's arms and taken to Six Bay because it feels like
if anyone deserves that treatment, it's Tom Paris., Tom Harris who did stay at his post.
Mm-hmm.
Or Kim after getting hit with like a pelican case by Celis,
trying to, he's just trying to get to engineering.
She fucking attacks him.
She's been alone for hours.
It's great that Harry Kim's penis is always safe.
He can continue to fuck.
Did you get the sense that he and Salis had had adalions?
I always do.
I really did too.
Like, their energy seemed to be like,
hey, like we've been as intimate with each other
as two people can be.
Can I come with you?
Of course.
Paris isn't the only person being injured
by these ship-wide problems.
Janeway and company are hypothesizing at this point that this may be a life form, causing
all of this stuff.
A life form trying to make a place to live inside Voyager.
And so they retreat to the Six Bay.
This is another moment in the episode where like,
I love a ship just being lit by Red Alert.
Like, that's the only light that there is.
It's just red.
You could make photographs there.
Yeah, in the corridor.
Yeah, yeah, it's a dark room.
Maybe they should scan for life for us.
Life, fuck.
You tiny little life, fuck.
You precious little life, fuck.
Or where are you?
Do they ever think of that at the same time?
I wouldn't recommend that.
No, okay. I love Nielix using a burner for a light though.
That's fun.
Was that what he was doing?
Like he had the walk on full blast.
The thing that you know when you set up
a gas sensor in your kitchen
is that any burner creates poison gas for you
in your family when you're cooking.
And evidently Nelix is okay with this trade-off. He's exchanging light for poison.
He really is.
Like, you can see the smoke coming off the walk.
Like, it's...
I don't like the smoke.
You know, like, when you leave like a kettle on, you know,
like, oh, I'll make some coffee and then you walk away and you
like get distracted by something and then you like, you're like, what is that like horrible
acrid smell? And it's like, it is like the impurities in your tap water, like evaporating off the
surface of way too hot steel in your kettle. That's what's happening to Nielix's walk and,
steel in your kettle. That's what's happening to Neelix's walk. And I can't imagine what it smelled like on set that day.
There's one detail in the scene that I really liked, which is the Phillips head fastener
around the window frame that Neelix is looking out of.
Oh, I didn't notice that. The question I have about that is like, what's the story you make up about seeing a Phillips head
fastener on a starship like this? Is this just like, hey, it's old-timey Nielix's
mess hall where we use Phillips head fasteners and wood. You know? Like it's sort of like
the, it's tantamount to like the net and plastic crab motif of a mid-market
seafood restaurant.
Like, check out this classic fastener.
Yeah.
The JGA Abrams Star Trek universe contains things such as Budweiser because, you know, modern
motion pictures are less accommodating
of the idea of a post-scarcity socialist future
where brands don't exist anymore.
Sure.
But maybe in the Voyager future,
torques, fasteners don't exist
because torques is a brand name also.
I wanna let the friends of the pseudo know
that we've switched back to Topo Chico Heart
Seltzer.
We're now on Tanguy Lemon Lime.
Ben, what's your review of Tanguy Lemon Lime?
Mildly better than mango.
I would say at this moment, going from Topo Chico to Madelo back to Topo Chico, but specifically,
Tanguy Lemon Lime was a good choice.
But if we went from Madelo
into that fucking mango poison, that would be bad.
We have two more cans of the mango poison
that I moved out of the way to get to the Tengu lemon lime.
Is this our last Tengu lemon lime?
No, I think we have two more Tengu lemon lime.
This is the haunting of greatest generation if you're saying that we've got only mango left. And with this
shot, we enter our final 10 minutes of the power round. Another detail I really liked
in this scene was how Borgie the music was. Like, it was very like first contact
haunted house Borg music in the scene
where Felix is alone in his mess hall.
Is somebody out there?
He like starts like wandering down the hall
and like, there's that door that's like chopping open and closed.
Yeah.
And like, Tuvakas wearing like a CPAP machine
and like sneaks up behind him.
That show beef changed my relationship
to doors that close on their own.
Because in that show, a emergency door,
just sliced a person in half.
This is a horror movie trope that I think happens fairly often.
That alley-wong show?
Yeah, I wouldn't want to get nearer door
that was doing that.
I punched out of that show after two episodes.
I didn't know it had grisly ass shit like that.
Oh, yeah.
It's got a door that kills people.
Wow.
It's like deathbed, the bed that kills people.
This is a thing.
At this point, we cut back from Neelix's yarn to the Lillis Borgs, and they're like,
why didn't you just turn off your fear?
And I was like, damn.
The Borgs have an amazing technology if that's available to them.
Hey, Egypt.
How do you think I get through my shift? amazing technology if that's available to them. Hey Egypt!
How do you think I get through my shift?
Sweep and sewage every day.
That's a board technology, that's our species.
That's probably one of the biological distinctiveness as they wanted.
I could sweep shit for my entire life, and I'd be fine with it.
That should don't scare me.
You know what does scare me?
Heaven amop that doesn't have a light built in.
So Nielix tells Tuvak in these Jeffries tubes
about the Selvaxia, which is a bit of a
daughter party adjacent story in the Tullaxian, like Urban Legend canon.
Didn't you think that this story should be the whole story?
A story like this? Explode it on the entire episode.
Wow. This is the point of the whole thing.
It kind of is, but unlike TNG, Voyager didn't really have the budget to
half an entire ship set built for a storyline. Imagine drawing straws for air.
That's rough. Sorry, Borg Jax. You're getting them more air, you get the short straw.
Yeah.
I mean, the little this borders are freaking out about this when they hear about it.
Like, do you think they ate each other?
Like, like, what happened?
And Nielix is even more freaked out about it than they are.
He's like, eh, let's not talk about that.
The kids have great imaginations for this.
Yeah, I think they would be great in an emergency situation.
I mean, they'd be great to eat an emergency situation, I think.
They look delicious.
We comfort the littlest borgs at the night time, mostly, mostly. Back in the Jeffries tubes, they open a door and behind it is that
nebular gas and they shut it real fast. Maybe there's something to
that can hit behind a panel to vent it. Do you think, is that possible? You know who I identified most with in this episode?
Each of you, brother.
Kim feeling bad about leaving me, Alex behind.
I don't know.
Just anybody like racked with guilt.
I just, I'm like, ah, that's my guy.
That's you.
You're the locus of guilt for the show.
So Janeway comes up with the idea as they're working the problem in engineering,
of talking to this entity that is involved itself in their ship via the like pre-recorded
automatic alerts that are in the computer, which I really liked. Like, it only has like so many things in the, you know, in the soundboard to reply with,
but she starts to kind of get a sense that like, oh, there's like an intelligence at play here.
Are you attempting to communicate? Are they able to comply?
In so many ways, constraints make for great creative creative decisions and that's what it feels like this is right they they had these things and
It's it orders captain Janeway to the ass lab and
Everybody's like no like this is nuts. You cannot go to the ass lab right now. She's like I've got to do it
You expect Janeway to put the ship on the line because this is what she does.
She's willing to destroy everyone for spate. She's a very spiteful captain. She is. And is never more
vividly illustrated than when she says, like, all right, seven, you and me are going to the ass lab and Chico Teys, like, really?
I mean, like, I'm running out of pencils here. What?
In the Jeffries tubes, it's a far less interesting part of the story,
where Tuvac teaches Nelix some meditation techniques.
I like that he was able to do a guided meditation during, like,
he is actively, like, wrenching on pipes and stuff.
The thing about Tuvac is he knows what a fucking dead weight he's got with him.
And he's just doing anything he can to to keep himself from dying because of this bullshit.
But as like a new homeowner like I mean this is this again is very aspirational like I have attempted to lie
under my kitchen sink and like fix a leak before and the idea of doing that while
guiding someone through a relaxation technique is trying to imagine Nielix with you for anything
that you're trying to do like twoac is a kill him with kindness guy.
Yeah.
It's an anchor.
Yeah.
It really is.
I think you're one behind here, buddy.
We are coming up on our penultimate shot.
And I think we should do this one and our next one together.
I'd love that.
There are so many cans at my feet.
An uncountable number, I would say.
We're almost there. I can't believe it.
Yeah.
I haven't checked in with you enough.
How do you feel?
I feel like this has been an assault on my body and my mind.
But I think this has been a good episode so far, a weird energy for an episode.
And I think that that's why it's on the board.
Hey, here it comes.
The final shot.
We hit it, buddy.
This is the hour.
This is a much less popular version of Hot Ones.
Okay.
Okay.
Who's the person that we have a relationship with
that would do a power hour with us from
the Star Trek universe?
Like, we have good relationships with Star Trek people.
Who would do that with us?
Let's see.
I think Tony Newsom's fun and...
I think fun and getting fucked up with us is another level.
Yeah. is another level. Yeah, Aaron Waltke, the head writer of Prodigy
is a big scotchman.
He really is.
We've been fucked up together.
I don't know if it, I don't know if like,
fucked up on scotch translates to fucked up
on Topo Chico though.
Anyways, Nielix's guided meditation
turns into a nightmare and he gets his, I don't know,
is this supposed to be like a bowl of spaghetti or like a cake or whatever?
When Jainway pulls the lid away from the dish and it's like scary nebula gas.
I mean, sometimes like when you get the smoked old-fashioned, do you get the smoke?
So this sort of feels like that.
One of our favorite bars, Canon and Seattle,
has a, sometimes on the menu,
a cocktail called the Georgia Camp Fire, that is smoked.
And it does feel like that, yeah.
And it's fun when you're expecting it.
If you get a face full of smoke
when you're not expecting it, that's bad.
Especially when that cloud looks like a
ghoulish mouth of teeth trying to chomp you.
Yeah, get rid of those teeth.
That's what I say.
Yeah.
So it turns out this is a life form.
They make it to the ass lab and they get,
they've like uploaded like a database to a system
and they're talking to it in a little bit more
cogent of language.
And it's like, I want you to take me back to that nebula
and it's ET phone home.
You gotta take the ET home.
And they double back.
And when they get there, that nebula is gone baby.
Like whatever the Voyager did to it
has dissipated the nebula.
This is an awful moment in this episode, right?
I mean, it seems like it should be easy.
Let's drop this fucking thing off and be done with it.
Once the Voyager has done is a war crime!
They take a nebula and dissipate it into space and they never apologize for anything!
The thing that is so consistent is the rage that this thing feels.
Like try to imagine getting into a ride chair. And having the ride chair driver going,
I don't know where we're going.
Now that your destination isn't there anymore,
what do you wanna do?
I would be pissed.
If I were this nebular being, I would get out of the car.
You've done what you could,
but the difference between me and the
Snabbular thing is, this Snabbular thing is pissed.
Yeah.
It's too much to destroy Voyager.
It sends Jane way back to her state room,
and she pulls back the sheets on her bed.
And in meat, it has spelled out the name Judas.
Oh my god.
And she goes, what does it mean? It means a matter. It means
Ray Wangay. I love this scene. Like the scenes of Janeway arguing with this thing are good.
They're really good. But the nebula makes it really clear that like this thing may or may not
have been your fault, but I'm gonna make it your fault.
Yeah, I'm that pissed at you.
And I want your ship.
If my neighbor isn't gonna be out there,
at least I'm gonna take your ship.
Yeah, I need compensation.
And so it starts raging around the ship.
One of the things that it does is
were frightening Tuvak, who was working on that stuff.
And this is an interesting moment because like he is, he's fried.
He's got some burger on his face.
Not a Tom Parris amount of burger, but a good amount of burger.
The Tom Parris burger is like a triple burger.
Yeah.
Which I think a lot of times you feel like you can take on.
Yeah.
It's actually a little too much.
Tuvak ordered his burger off like the kids menu.
Yeah.
And he's like, logic would dictate that you take the CPAP machine and go.
And Nielix is like, fuck that, man.
Like, we'll trade off the CPAP.
And...
You never want to share a CPAP machine, though.
Yeah, it's like sharing a toothbrush. Yeah, very intimate. trade off the CPAP and you never want to share a CPAP machine though.
Yeah, it's like sharing a toothbrush.
Very intimate.
But then again, two Valkyrie leeks have been one man before.
So they have a special intimacy.
It's like the United States and the UK.
Yeah, yeah, or Harry Kim and Celis.
Yeah.
So they share a mask and work their way down the Jeffries to, I would say that
Janeway is kind of trying her own logical shit on the life form. She's explaining like
if the crew dies, like the maintenance load of this ship is like big. I love that the argument is,
this ship is too much of the pain in the ass for you.
You gotta have a couple of people take care of it, right?
Right, like you're gonna need to like hire some deck hands.
Like, it's very aspirational to own your own sailboat,
but it's environment is trying to destroy it at all times.
It's actually better to have friends with a boat
instead of a boat of your own.
Exactly, exactly.
She is arguing with this thing
and it gets so fucking intense, man.
Like you talked about the red alert is the only light.
This scene is like flashing red and black.
Gas is like coming up around Janeway
and she's like, kill me.
Like, if you want the ship so bad,
you're gonna have to fucking kill me for it.
I don't like seeing Kate Moghru choke in this scene.
And I think part of it is that she's such an effective actor
is that she makes it feel so real.
Yeah.
Like, this is one of those instances where like, she's too good at making me feel like
this is happening, and it actually makes this uncomfortable to watch.
That's an amazing scene.
Like, I think it's like watching Meryl Streep get choked out.
Yeah, the discomfort of the scene is so palpable that it really takes the episode to a new level,
you know?
I especially like the part where the gas is starting to like visually the gas is rising
up from the floor to her neck.
And this is like a visual language that we're familiar with for like a bunch of different
types of
scenarios, mostly with water though.
Yeah.
Keimo Guru is starting to drown in this nebular gas.
And she's like, before you take me, I'm just going to wipe my fingers on the computer panel
on the wall.
I'm not going to let you take me like this.
I'm gonna just try the ship first.
Now I'm gonna run the bag of my fingernails
across the grooves of a vinyl record.
Fuck you, Nebula!
Like, how could you ever think you get one over on on Janeway here?
Yeah. So like at the last minute, it reverses its shutting down of all of the life
support stuff on the ship. And it chickens out like you never going to play
chicken with Jane when when no, it tried to call her bluff. She's not bluffing.
She's never bluffing.
She'd rather die.
And they turn a portion of Deck 12
into a simulated nebula.
The creature's been loving there ever since.
I told you there is a monster in Deck 12.
Haven't you been listening?
It's not a monster.
This is so effective, right?
Like, to not see it.
Yeah.
I usually love seeing it.
But in this scene, not seeing it is more effective.
And it's so fun to think that like,
this has been going on on the ship since before.
Yeah.
The Lillis Borgs were even aboard.
Yeah.
How long before we don't know, but like,
it's been a part of the ship for a long time.
This is a story that happened in the past. They get the power back and the Borks kids
are all getting put back to bed and they're like, you're just, you're Josh in. That didn't
really happen. I love the idea of Nielix being a shitty storyteller, but it being revealed
that he was actually good.
Yeah.
Good job by him.
Good job by him.
Good job by you, Cheb catching that thing about how Nadion emissions aren't a thing
that the Bussard collectors do.
Good job by us. Getting through an episode of Greatest Gen, hammered on a combination of
Topo Chico and Madela Especial. Good job. By the friends of DeSoto for supporting
whatever the fuck this is. Did you like this episode, Ben?
You know, I made it easy to get along with most of the time, but I I thought this episode really slapped and loving this
back half of season 6 void your shit where it's like really treating Star Trek as a
place and really trying to think creatively about what kinds of stories you can tell.
And like campfire story is not an obvious one.
And it should be though.
And they did such a good job with it.
They did such a good job of like,
I think that the thing that is most amazing
about this episode is the amount of uncertainty it leaves like
Neelix is a mid story teller in some ways like his details are not always like
Scientifically accurate or whatever and that leaves you open to wondering like what parts of this were and were not embellished
mm-hmm and
if this word and were not embellished. And if this is a thing that the ship went through
before the Lilis Borgs came aboard, what does that mean for the entity that was living
on deck 12 in between then and now? That's such a fun thing for a TV show to do, to like retcon a truth about the ship for a whole mess of episodes. And
I thought it was really bracing and wild and like took so many like surprising twists and turns.
I think that like the it's a misunderstanding and this entity was accidentally brought on board thing, is telegraphed maybe like a little
bit too early in the episode, but that might just be a, I've watched too much Star Trek and
noticed it too early thing.
But yeah, overall I thought it was a really fun ride and I enjoyed being on it.
How about you? There have been close to 150 episodes of Voyager,
and I think it's shocking that it's taken that many
to get to campfire episode as a genre.
You and I have talked a lot about like during our tour
for Star Trek V, like when you don't have a budget,
all you have is light.
And this episode is an expression of that.
Yeah.
Like, you don't have to do a lot of different stuff
except do weird shit with light.
You already have the budget for that.
And this is that episode.
I really liked what they did here
to make this episode feel different based
on those choices.
Yeah.
I mean, Nelix, not the best storyteller, Unvoidger.
I mean, a Harry Kim episode, telling stories probably isn't appropriate for kids.
I get that.
Then what happened?
I lasted 22 minutes. I understand how obvious the choices to make him
that, but I wonder how much they thought about giving the campfire story to someone else. Because
like, Tom Parris is obviously the pilot and he's only interested in old-time TV or whatever. But like,
he has a grasp of genre in such a way that like
could make him an interesting storyteller. And also like, I want to mix the Borgs kids up with
different types of people. Like it's always Nelix. Nelix always gets this shit job. If it's not each of brother, he talk about shit jobs.
Check out what I have to do.
You could get weirder, but as weird episodes go,
I like this one a lot.
Yeah.
And as a genre break, really into it.
Yeah, fun one.
You know what else is fun, Adam, is the priority one inbox.
You want to head in there and see what's waiting for us?
Ben, I'm already in.
Pryority one message from Starfleet coming in on Secured Channel.
Need a supplement on that.
Puppelone?
Puppelone.
Puppelone.
Yeah, it's extra.
But the interest alone could be enough to buy this ship.
And our first priority one message is of a promotional nature.
That message goes like this.
Ever wanted to start your own podcast, but
I'm sure how to get to the
dulcet,
siltry tones of Ben and Adam.
Maybe you want to punch up your already existing podcast like
Windy did or whatever this thing was prior to her arrival.
Or maybe you're a music or band person looking for the perfect mix. If your next
song or clarinet concerto?
Well look no further. I'm Scott
Friendly a quad audio engineer podcast and music producer
crowd FOD and I'd love to help you turn your art glimpses into realities
Check it out visit scotthullquist.com for details. That's
SEO TTHA
double L
Q U I S T dot com for details or DM me directly at Scott underscore harder
on Instagram. That's SC OTT underscore H A R D E R on Instagram.
Mention your F OOD for a discount on all services everywhere.
Wow.
And we've got a professional here.
Okay, then.
Making it clear to all FODs that your podcast doesn't have to sound like garbage.
Your band doesn't have to have to sound like trash. It sounds like there is a freelance windy pretty out there for just about anybody to hire.
Look, you should be so fucking lucky.
If you have a chance to get a windy pretty, not our windy pretty, if you try to take her,
I will fucking kill you.
But a person like that for your production, they'll save your life.
No kidding.
Get it Scott Hallquist.com for details.
Get it Scott Hallquist.
Hey, Adam, our next priority one message is from Quinn R to my future self, goes like this, greetings from 2023, leaving a time capsule for my future
self.
Currently I've been to season 3 of the DS9 run.
My feelings about the podcast thus far can only be compared to when a little piece of
dried up hand sanitizer gets stuck in the pump and it ejaculates all over my shirt. That is to say,
Quint embarrassing. Yet somewhat also satisfying.
That is so specific. Yeah. Quint, don't feel embarrassed, just feel satisfied. The embarrassment is ours to experience Quinn's like dirty hands in the sink
Need and soap
I got to clean them hmm
This happens all the time to me that membrane inside the the soap nozzle. It wants to shoot at my pants.
I have this problem.
I mean, it's, I'm not saying it's not relatable.
I'm just saying that like,
when one thing we can do is make things worse.
If you're soap, what are you doing?
Yeah, but like,
Quinn doesn't have to go to like
me his
significant others friends and tell them
what they do for a living.
I fucking hate that. I do the right thing.
I'm using soap.
And it's making me dirtier.
Right, but
again, not as embarrassing as being like my full-time job it's a
Star Trek podcaster and I don't even really make the fun of doing it I quite a
different better career for this. It's hard to imagine sometimes. Like, you know what's great?
You know what the meme is for greatest gen is like the car sliding into the off ramp?
That's like, uh, will not support your family.
Seems at the time it would be a good idea financially.
It's not.
No.
Ben are final priority and message. And I want to say priority one messages.
Go a long way in supporting this show.
And we really appreciate them.
Final one.
Is that really true, Adam?
I mean, FODs are doing what they can.
FODs like for some reason reason this is from Ben and Adam and it's too
ZAC from before.
What the fuck?
Their message goes like this, thank you Ben and Adam for your encouragement.
W slash R slash T. Leaving my tech job to pursue my values.
Wow.
Today, I accepted an offer to work in my public library's makerspace, hoping folks of all
ages create things with pre-replicator technology.
Maybe I'll even encounter FODs, making their own combat and ice linear chips.
Can't wait for the Denver live show.
Daaaaay! It's Zack from before, it's't wait for the Denver live show day
It's Zach from before is gonna gonna be at the Denver live show is that the guy
I don't think Zach is that him. I don't think that is he him
Come on Zach from before is not library material
Zach I dream about doing what you're doing.
Yeah, that sounds cool. So leaving something that is a ruining your financial life,
choosing something better as a result.
Hmm.
Look, friends of just so to priority one messages are a great way to
support the production of the show.
I really want to encourage you to do one at maximumphone.org slash jumbo-tron.
Yeah, no kidding. Personal messages are a hundred bucks. Promotional messages are an insane
$200. Do you even promote something for $200. That's it.
Do you have any idea how broad our audience is?
Do you have any idea how much it costs a company
that is booking ads on our show?
Like the delta between promotional message
and ad on our show, staggeringly big,
and yet going broke doing this.
It's insane.
But you have a special opportunity right now.
There's lots of inventory open for P1s.
Get in on the P1s before we have to stop doing this show.
Usually the P1s booked out many months in advance.
Right now, P1s, wide fucking open. Go go sick.
Hey Ben, what's that Adam? Did you find yourself a drunk Shimoda?
I'm gonna give it to Echeb for the hubris of thinking, hey Echeb, What's up with your hubiress?
You just think because you noticed one detail about what the bizarre collectors don't emit.
You get to go to sleep and not be afraid of ghosts and think they go pump it and hide.
One thing about my job is I really know the general health of the ship
Through the thickness of the sludge I'm mopping you ever hear about all they like figured out where there's a lot of COVID-19 by testing the sewer
I test for everything
I'm a first responder
with a mop Each of my drash about how about you?
Each of's hard to be however
He looks as the main storyteller here. Mm-hmm. Do you think Neelix is a good job?
I don't think he does a great job. He's good with his Neelix good with kids. I
job. He's good with, is Neelix good with kids?
I think that there is something cool about telling spooky stories to kids.
There's a moment, there's several moments in this episode where it feels like Neelix knows, like he has that self awareness where he's like, I know these kids fucking hate
me. I don't know when trust me to tell a good story. And yet here I am. Yeah.
And I'm doing it. And I think that's what makes him the Shimoda to me. Like he's field promoted
to storyteller and he does fine. And he seems to be okay with that. Yeah. Nelix drunk Shimoda. He's a very drunk Shimoda. Yeah. Persistently.
Go ahead and get the hell out of here!
Ben, we are on square 100 of the game of Buttholes,
the Will of the Caretaker.
We've made it.
This has been a Mornhammer episode.
It sure has been Adam.
Let me pull up the fucking thing and do the fucking shit.
It's hard to believe we finally made it to the top.
Couple of false starts up until now.
Yeah, but you know.
You finally got what you didn't want,
which is the Mornhammer episode. Ben, our next episode, we're recording
right after this one. Literally. Literally. Right after this episode, a soft Mornhammered,
if you will, is the next episode. What's it going to be? The next episode, Adam, is season six episode 26.
The final episode of season six,
Unimactrix Zero, part one.
Captain Janeway phases her biggest battle yet
against the board, assimilation.
That's it?
A assimilation is the battle? Yeah.
Huh. Well, that's the description of the battle anyways.
Alright. That's it. End of season six, we're
we're here. We're here. But how will we be here, Adam?
For that, we will have to turn. Think about that every morning when I wake up
to our beloved board game
that has only steered us wrong this one time. Did the makers of the board game hate us or love us?
I think they like us. They made us a whole app for free, usually cost money.
This is the week after Halloween.
Hmm.
Feeling spooked?
Two spooked, two furious. You're required to learn as you play.
Roll.
Ben, roll that bone.
See what happens.
We've only got one possible crazy outcome.
They're mostly good.
We have rolled a five.
Shula!
Did I win?
Harving.
And I really appreciate the studio audience here
holding their gasps and just being generally like
dead silent the entire time that we've been doing this.
Yeah.
The five has landed us on Square five, which is a regular episode.
How about that? But you know, you and I, Ben, and also the friends of Disodo in the live studio
audience, we're going to be writing out this buzz through the next episode. It's going to be good.
It's going to be kind of a point five more in hammered episode. Yeah.
The next episode. A freebie. A half freebie. A free more in
hammered. And you know, like this is this is going so great here at
the end of the episode that I think people are really going to be
looking forward to that. It's also going to be a code 47. So
you'll be able to watch what Ben and Adam look like in this
frame of mind. Can't believe we agreed to this.
Sign up for our YouTube.
Hit subscribe on that.
And hey, let's do some thank yous.
We got to thank Wendy Pretty, the producer and editor of this program who I'm sure has
suffered quite a bit to get through this edit, to get it to you today. Thank you Wendy
Sorry
Thank you also to Adam Ragusia the
music
Maker of our show the the food maker of our lives
Yeah, it's true. He makes a great food and teachers teachers he had to do it over on his YouTube channel.
He's the thing that really sold me on his YouTube channel all the way back in the day,
is that it is not really like a, here is a recipe, here is how you make it, it is a like,
here is a kind of thing I like to cook.
Here is an approach that I take to cooking it,
and you are going to learn a lot about
the kind of thought process behind why you cook a thing the way you cook it along the way.
Yeah, and it's a great resource for anybody that is curious about food.
Adam Raguse is great. He really is.
Hey, we got to thank the great Bill Tilly, the card daddy who runs our social media accounts
at greatest trek on all the social media platforms.
If you'd like to send something in for a future code 47, slide into those DMs and Bill will
consider what you've got as a potential thing.
I really appreciate him for being the
screener between us and the glitter. Bill visited the White House with us was
briefly detained and imprisoned. For reasons we don't know or understand.
Yeah, but made it out in one piece and I appreciate that.
Is back on the social media, front lines for us.
Yeah.
Unwilling or unable to tell us why.
With that, we will be back at you next time with another great episode of Star Trek Voyager
and episode of the greatest generation Voyager where Ben and Adam are on camera showing off
that decolatage. I'm gonna make it sound. I'm gonna make it sound. Mmm.
Looks great.
I'm gonna make it sound.
I'm gonna make it sound.
I'm gonna make it sound.
I'm gonna make it sound.
I'm gonna make it sound.
I'm gonna make it sound.
I'm gonna make it sound.
I'm gonna make it sound.
I'm gonna make it sound.
I'm gonna make it sound.
I'm gonna make it sound.
I'm gonna make it sound.
I'm gonna make it sound.
I'm gonna make it sound.
I'm gonna make it sound.
I'm gonna make it sound.
I'm gonna make it sound.
I'm gonna make it sound got it, got it.
Jeffries tubes.
I love them.
Mmm.
Maximum fun.
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