The Greatest Generation - Secretly Jacked (S3E7)
Episode Date: August 1, 2016When the Enterprise drops off a Dustbuster Club on a planet besieged by plot-forwarding radiation, the away team loses track of Geordi and beams up an injured Romulan instead. Stuck in a hole and slow...ly going blind, Geordi's fate lies with an ally who discloses some troubling opinions about eugenics. How careful do you have to be when a Romulan pulls you over? Can gaberdine wick away moisture before the chafing starts? Is this the start of Riker's drinking problem? It's the episode where Worf is made to disclose his donation status.
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Hey friends of Disodo.
Before today's episode, we just wanted to take a moment to talk about the historic labor
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If you're a fan of the work done by the people who make Star Trek, we hope you'll join
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We're doing our best to understand where the picket lines
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Link in the episode description. Okay, now let's get on with the show.
Here's to the greatest generation.
Star Trek Podcast by two guys who are a little bit embarrassed to have a Star Trek Podcast.
I'm your host, Adam Pranica.
I'm your other host, Ben Harrison.
Hey, Ben.
What's that, Adam?
You had a pretty good couple of days, didn't you?
What do you mean?
I mean, you went to go see the Star Trek movie and I haven't seen it yet.
Oh yeah, you're going soon, right?
I'm going to go see it after we record this episode.
Nice.
We should record a special spoilerific,
greatest gen episode about the new movie.
That's what I'm thinking.
It's not often that we have a new movie to spoil a fire.
Yeah, it's about time we get around to spoiling something made within the last 20 years.
Here's my proposal.
We do it. We release the episode on like a Friday, like a day that we wouldn't have a normal episode,
so it doesn't affect our regularly scheduled podcast.
And everybody should know that it will be spoiler
effects. So if you care about that, you know, you've been warned.
Yeah, you don't have to listen to it if you don't want to. Yeah. Yeah, I feel like we're
running into this conflict with a few of our viewers where we're like, if you don't
like it, go listen to something else. In fact, it's easier not to listen to our
show than to listen.
We're doing everything we can to prevent new listeners.
So...
We hugely appreciate all the listeners we do have.
That's not to imply that we don't.
Right.
What do you say we get into a ban?
You mean into a pack of cards? Yes.
The game is five cards, the game is exceeding.
They're simple.
What are the cards there?
Time to pluck a pigeon.
Yeah, I just felt like we haven't opened any in a while, so.
Especially after talking to Biff on the Twitters.
Yeah, I really want to find a Yeager in here.
I have a card for an episode called Lessons.
Oh, this is that one where he like, he like plays piano and flute with the hot music officer.
Ever that episode?
Yes.
Wish I didn't, but I do.
Whenever I open a packet card, I flip through them as fast as possible to see if there's not a graph in there.
If there's a Jaeger?
Yeah, to the exclusion of all other concerns. Whenever I open a packet card, I flip through them as fast as possible to see if there's no graph in there.
There's a yager.
Yeah, to the exclusion of all other concerns.
I, uh, I kind of like the little reveal.
I got a weird signature card in here.
It feels like sort of double thickness of the rest of the cards.
Well it's not like the signature cards we've seen before.
It looks like an episode card. But it's got a gold signature on it. What?
Yeah, it's one or T's's
signature who is the designer of all of these cards. It's it's like double thickness of the standard card and
it's got a embossed gold signature. It's for the episode contagion.
Dang.
Yeah, it's stamped number 47 of 125. So this is a limited edition.
Man, you get all the cool cards.
I know. I know.
I mean, I still got my George Baxter, but...
Dude, I trade you a contagion for a George Baxter.
No, you wouldn't't that would be madness my next card is the nth degree oh no this is that one
where Barclay gets all super smart
oh yeah they hook him up to the static discharge machine yeah he's got the
lasers going into his brain yeah that, that's fun. Chain of command part two. Wapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwapwap Should you old man? It might be that, but it's also the one where Picard is like in the hands of the Cardassians
and is getting torture and interviewed.
Right.
Right.
All he has to do is say how many lights there are.
I don't know why he has such a hard time with that.
He's man of principle.
Let's see, coming of age, that's that one where Remick was tearing the ship apart.
No quagmire on the card, it's just a wessly and the enterprise.
And my last one is Night Terrors, which is, I think the one where Troy is having the like...
It's another one where the ship is stuck and they can't unstick it.
And then like...
Sticking the mud.
Troy's having special dreams about how to unstick it. Yeah, sticking the mud. Troy's having special dreams.
About how to unstick it.
Special dreams.
Personal dreams.
So I got the contagion card, the special edition.
And then I got the vengeance factor,
which is a really cool picture of Riker.
He looks like he's on the cover of a romance novel.
I think I have the vengeance factor.
Yeah.
Do I not?
I got that one, Sins of the Father,
with a great picture of Warf on it.
Reunion and firstborn.
So sort of a, a Klingon heavy pack I got here.
Yeah.
I got to say, pretty good pack for me. Solid pack, bro.
Well, should we get into an episode? Yeah, let's hit it.
It's season three, episode seven, the enemy. This is one of those episodes that starts
with like a pure cold open.
Yeah, this is like one of the best cold opens
we have yet seen.
Yeah, occasionally you get the ship in orbit
and you get a captain's log sort of setting the scene.
Or yeah.
In this episode you get a fade up and we are on
basically planet anybody canyons.
We're on LV426 from the alien films. Totally.
And speaking of cold opens Adam.
Oh yeah. Really excited for our first beer sponsorship.
Yeah, we've had tequila. Why not beer?
So yeah, and this is also it's also interesting because they say like if data was down here,
he'd be getting scrambled by all the
electromagnetic activity, which I thought was cool,
because there's definitely been times
when data could beam down,
because it would be hazardous for anybody else.
Yeah.
This is a time where they can beam down, but not data.
Yeah, it's a convenient device.
Mm-hmm.
So they are, yeah, they're, they're, it's, they're
groping around. It's Jordy, Riker, and Warf. And they've, I
guess they've picked up a signal from a, like a distress
signal from a Rimeo and craft. Rikers like on the, on the
timer, because they have a window. And if they don't be
in back before this window closes,
the storm is gonna get too intense
and the transporter beam,
even with the pattern enhancer that they've been down with,
it's just not gonna cut it.
So, you know, steaks is high and there's a clock running.
This is not a planet that has a great deal of vegetation
or any life to speak of,
but Jordi might not just to slip on a banana peel
and go down a hole.
Oh.
Oh.
Jordi chooses not to do the front flip
that crew members typically choose
on falling in holes.
He just, he goes straight down.
Yeah.
There's a lot of deep, well-like holes on planets in the Star Trek universe,
aren't there?
Yeah.
Just like vertical sides that you can't grab anything on.
Yeah, and the storm is like whipping up and raker and wharf find a past out Romulan, or
specifically wharf does, right?
Yeah, and look, like they choose to split up
in this giant storm, and this is part of the problem, right?
Yeah.
Like, they can't see each other barely,
they can't hear each other at all,
is the move really to split up to do more damage?
Yeah, I don't know.
I mean, the other thing is their tricorders have like a very limited range. Like, they don't have any way to
find each other. It's not like they have their digital string tied around
their waist to keep them together. And unclear like what Jordi was off looking
for, you know, because they find some busted up ship parts and then
they keep looking and Worf finds a passed out Romulan and is checking to see if the guy has a pulse
when he wakes up, sees a Klingon looming over him and goes for Worf's throat.
clinging on looming over him and goes for Worf's throat. And Worf does an awesome claw move on the guy.
Oh my God.
Yeah, the five finger exploding calm.
Yeah, it's like Worf is confident enough
that this guy is not gonna crush his windpipe
that he really winds up on this.
And I'm then just like
clocks the dude in the face causing him to pass out a new and he and Riker shlet the guy
over to the to the beam down site and discover that Jordy is nowhere to be found.
Four minutes to beam up, where is he?
Yeah and this window is closing like they either beam up now or they stay down for the duration and
Warfin Riker have that moment where Riker's like we got to get the fuck out
Yeah, and warfs like seriously and Rikers like seriously all this is said
Nonverbaly mind you this is my this is my summary of that moment
So we can't drop in the clip of them going seriously seriously seriously
Seriously are you for real dude? Yeah, yeah, I'm for real dude. Are you fucking serious right now? that moment. So we can't drop in the clip of them going seriously? Seriously? Seriously?
Are you for real?
Dude.
Yeah, I'm for real.
Dude, are you fucking serious right now?
I'm being up and off.
I'm being up and off.
I'm being quite living on a big,ogourney, which is a strange choice
because they often beam directly to six bay.
Right.
But this time they don't.
Who knows why?
Well, O'Brien doesn't get paid
if you beam them directly to six bay.
Oh, he's like a flight attendant or.
Yeah, he goes to the transport room
for a very specific reason.
Yeah.
So column can get a paycheck.
Yeah. They're only technically on the clock
when they're in air.
Right.
Yeah, so they get this Romulan up there
and he's pretty, he's pretty whooped
and we cut back down to the planet and Jordy is
just down the bottom of this hole,
sitting in a puddle, screaming for
wharf, ain't nobody gonna come help him. I mean and here we are presented with
our A story. It's sort of Jordy La Forge as Rambo in the movie First Blood.
Yeah. He's got to improvise some instruments and weapons. He's got to figure out a way to survive
down at the bottom of this hole and possibly get out of it.
And he does some pretty cool stuff in the process.
Totally.
Like the like tradecraft shit
that Jordy does in this episode is excellent.
Yeah.
The like it's like, you know, Jake get us doing
detective stuff in Chinatown or Rambo doing field traps in. Yeah. It's like, you know, Jake Gittis doing detective stuff in Chinatown or Rambo doing field
traps in first blood.
It's so cool.
You totally go into the universe that, okay, he's got a phaser that still works.
He has a tricorder that doesn't really work.
He's got a visor where he can do some light metaler G.
Like, what can he do in this hole?
And so what he does is he finds some iron rich rocks
digs a trench in the mud, fills the rocks into it
and uses that as a mold to make hand spikes
that he uses to claw his way up the side of this hole.
Pucking rat.
Have you ever used that thing at the gym where it's like sticks and holes and you've got
to pull yourself up the side of a thing?
I don't go to gyms.
I don't know what that thing is called, but it takes a lot of upper body strength to do
that. Yeah, that's the other thing.
And the length of this hole is, you never get a really good look at how deep it is, but
it looks...
It's got to be like 25 or 30 feet, right?
Yeah, yeah.
Jordy's jacked.
Yeah, I kind of get the feeling that he is from this scene.
Yeah, like, you don't, like those uniforms kind of hide it, but I think
Jordy might be totally shredded. I think he's also got to be super pissed that
he's ruined his $3,000 suit. Like all I could think about when he fell into that
mud was, ooh boy, like why couldn't it have been one of the old the old uniform
jobs? Right, yeah, and love our Burton was probably like, fuck after this, they're probably gonna put me back
in one of those old uniforms.
Gross, yeah he's got to wear this thing
like a wetsuit the rest of the time too.
That can't be comfortable as an actor wearing a wets wool.
No.
Wet wool gabberdine.
Have you ever jumped into the ocean
wearing a suit or anything, Ben?
No, I typically have suits that I wouldn't sacrifice in that way, but one time I had a suit that was...
A suit that I knew that I didn't particularly care for anymore and was kind of ready to get rid of it.
And I was working on...
It was made by Jinko James.
It was actually Dolce and Gabbana,
and I got it at like a sample sale for very cheap.
But we were shooting season two of Put This On,
and one of our sponsors was a Kiefer company,
just that yogurt drink.
And the host of the show, Jesse Thorn, who is also the proprietor of
Maximumfund.org, our network, happens to be the same suit size as me. So he put
this suit on and we shot a little commercial for this key for where he dumps a
bunch of bottles of it on his head while talking about the merits of key for.
Just to be clear, is that how you're supposed to consume Keifer? Trans
Dermally? That's the only thing you can take away from from this commercial. But
then we put the suit in like a box and Jesse and I left to go shoot the rest of
the show and so we were gonna be out of town for like two weeks. And we got back and I found that box like
in the back of a downstairs room in our apartment.
And I was like, you didn't send this?
It's full of yogurt and a suit.
What?
It was something I felt very guilty about sending to somebody
and asking them to clean at that point.
And so you did or you didn't?
We did and I don't know Ben.
That suit hangs in my closet to this day.
The place cleaned the shit out of it.
Wow.
I got a level with you.
I would have thrown that suit in the garbage rather than send it to someone, to some
poor cleaner, to have them deal with it.
This is one of the best Star Trek stories we've ever told.
Let us edit all of that out.
It is a tiny, pretty, well-installed, pretty face.
Are you rock-binding within yourself?
Just stand up, tell the truth.
You don't deserve the wealth that's beautiful.
Anyways, Jordy is totally filthy,
but is busy crafting tools that get him up out of this hole.
Yeah, and he's like, he gets to the surface, is totally filthy, but is busy crafting tools that get them up out of this hole.
Yeah, and he's like, he gets to the surface
and he's like kind of scrambling around
on the surface of this planet.
But he knows full well that he missed the window.
So it's a little unclear like why he is moving around.
Like, I kind of feel like he should not be moving around.
He should be like sticking in one spot.
You know, like when you're, you know, a little kid and you get lost in an amusement park,
you're supposed to stay in the same place.
Yeah, that is the rule. I think, I think he knows that no matter what, he's got to get out of the hole.
Yeah.
All of their concerns after that are just kind of secondary.
Fair enough. But it's not long before young Wesley Crusher.
Wesley the boy.
The boy.
Young Wesley Crusher.
My son.
The boy genius devises a way to get Jordi to converge on a specific spot, which is that
they're going to rig up a probe with a neutrino beam that's going to shoot into the sky.
And Jordi will be able to see that with his visor.
And he'll be able to go over the probe and like cause it to modulate its signal or whatever
bleep and blurp and they'll beam him up or whatever.
Yeah, it's sort of the equivalent of like a Klee glight outside of a movie premiere.
Like to Jority, he's seeing this giant beam shootup,
even in this crazy storm, he's able to see it.
And so there's no other thing
that it could be besides something from the Enterprise.
This is what Wesley posits.
Yeah, so back aboard the ship, the doctor,
whose hair is like 12 inches longer
than the last time we saw it.
I don't know if that happened in this episode or a previous episode,
but I definitely noticed it here.
Like, she had like a really specific length of hair
when this season started and now she's just like full-blown,
Beverly Crusher hair.
Yeah, this show, more and more, is not built for the binge
that we're giving it.
And all of these continuity things are really coming to the surface.
Yeah, I guess a week.
I guess maybe if you're watching these episodes once a week, you might not notice a massive
amount of growth in Beverly's hair, but...
Which is one of the reasons you watch a show like this.
Well, this is a Star Trek hair cast at him. It is one of the only reasons we got to show like this. Well, this is a Star Trek hair cast at him.
It is one of the only reasons we watch a show like this.
It's in the title.
So she's working hard on fixing up the Romulan
that they brought back from the service.
And they get him talking for a second, and he's like,
I am alone.
I will not answer any questions.
But he's in rough shape and they need to give him a blood transfusion, but obviously this
being a federation starship, they've got a relative posity of Romulans in the crew.
So they've got to do blood tests for everybody on the ship to see who can provide a blood transfusion.
And comes back that the only person on board that can do it is Worf.
And Worf is not chat up, given this decision
he's got to make is Riker. One of my favorite scenes in the episode is Worf begins by saying,
no, like actually fuck that and fuck you for even asking like there's no way I'm sticking my blood into that guy and
Saving his life like forget it. We're gonna let him die
So he rolls in a rikers room just to talk things over. He's a good guy to talk to yeah
And riker appears to be mid-bender you are busy. Forgive my intrusion
Because this is now the second straight episode where it's conceivable that
Riker could lose crew members.
Yeah.
Like crew members who he's close to.
Totally.
And the advice that Riker gives Warp at this moment is like, look man, I'm not gonna tell
you what you need to do.
Like, only you can come to a decision that you can live with.
But like, what the the hell man? Yeah, you maybe you maybe a rough and tumble cling on warrior guy, but around here we don't we don't merely let people die
Right and this maybe think it over this dude didn't personally kill your family
Like you can't hold every Romulan living responsible for something horrible that happened back in the day
Which is a pretty solid point, right?
Like, that's Kevin Uxbridge revenge right there.
Or if just goes like
First I will kill all Romulans, then I will fuck an inflated doll.
Camden becurd, I've got to put all of my fluids into that Romulans.
Every single fluid I have must feel that Romulage veins until he's positively bursting with
my fluids.
And so he sort of goes around the horn a little bit and considers his options and Beverly
toward the end does some super manipulativeulative shit, which is like, hey,
hey, Warf, you better come down to Sick Bay because this guy's about to die,
and you should probably watch, which I thought was super fucked up.
Yeah, I understand why. That's where she's coming from, but I feel like it's
probably a misfire with Warff given his specific personal experience with this character
who woke up, looked at Worf and attempted to strangle him to death.
Yeah.
I mean, Worf has his bad past with the Romulans, but he also has this guy specifically tried
to kill him to think about.
Yeah.
And not only that, he totally big dogs him in sick bay.
Like, Worf goes to see him and the Romulans like,
I would rather die than pollute my body
with a cling on filth.
Like fuck you a thousand times, peace out.
And then he flatlines.
Yeah.
Which was sort of a badass way to go out.
Yeah, I mean, I feel like
Wurf was pretty badass too.
Like he has a lot of melee mouth liberals
trying to tell him what to do.
And he's like, no, fuck that.
I don't fuck with this guy at all.
I'm not saving his life.
Even if it's the big man thing to do, I'm not doing it.
This was one of those scenes in an episode
I barely remembered that like I remember differently.
I thought for sure that Wharf gave him blood as sort of a revenge move.
I like stick it to him.
Yeah, and so when this Romulan died, it really surprised me.
Yeah, big twist in your memory.
Yeah, head can and twist. So down on the surface, Jordy has finally
spotted the neutrino beam and is a pretty funny line here. It was Wesley Cretta.
And he starts walking toward it and he's distracted by the fact that there's a
beam. So he doesn't notice
that a Romulan is coming up behind him to bop him on the head.
So he wakes up and this Romulan is like leering over him with a disruptor and preening of
the fact that he has taken Jordy Prisoner. And Jordy is very quickly just minimizing
this Romulan's achievement.
He's like, oh great.
So you and I are the only two people on the planet
and I'm your prisoner.
How proud you must be.
Pretty fun.
Yeah, there's a couple of big doggings happening here.
Yes.
In this episode, there's the sick Romulan
on the Enterprise moving to Big Dog Warf. episode, there's the sick Romulan on the enterprise moving to Big
Dog Wharf, and then there's another sick Romulan on the planet service, Big Dog and Jordy.
Yeah, but I think Jordy is Big Dog and back. He's giving as good as he's getting.
They are enemies by affiliation, but they have to work together to get off of this planet because the Romulans people are
Not aware of the situation and the enterprise has put something in place that can help them beam up
But the Romulan doesn't love the idea of becoming Jourdie's prisoner
And has to really be talked into it like it's gonna be us both dying or
You becoming my prisoner.
So what principles are you standing on here?
What are the stakes for you?
That's a pretty interesting argument, Jordy makes.
There are probably situations that Jordy would choose to die rather than go into Romulan
hands.
He acknowledges that that's probably true of this guy.
And if what they were up to, which is like pretty suspicious because they're in Federation
space, but if whatever they were up to wasn't such a big deal that he can become a Federation
prisoner, like maybe he should think about it rationally on those terms.
Jordy is speaking rationally to someone who is spaszing out and sweating,
and not really acting like someone who can process
that information in a good way.
Yeah, he's real methy in a lot of ways.
Jordi is the proprietor of a motel,
and this guy hasn't paid his room bill in a couple of days and
Jordi is wise to what's going on.
But also knows that this guy has has enough of a stash that he could make Jordi whole.
Is that a good metaphor?
Yeah, that's great.
So the other thing is that the like environment on this planet is Angelot, and Synodra, Domo Kringes, and Angelot, and Synodra.
So the other thing is that the environment on this planet is wreaking havoc on their systems,
and Jordi is going blind real quickly, and the Romulan is losing his ability to walk real quickly.
So...
Yeah, it's given off radiation, right?
Yeah.
Radiation of the type that's making the Romulan all spazzy and is taking away really the only thing that Jordi
Can use to save their lives down there. Yeah, it's pretty scary as soon as Jordi's lights go out like it's a type of radiation that the
Scientists have called MacGuffin radiation
It's the same type of radiation they had on that planet in instance of command
It's the same type of radiation they had on that planet in Entens of Command. Right.
The kind of radiation that has a very specific effect that moves the plot forward.
Yes, it can only be detected by using tricordazine.
Yeah.
So once we remove one conflict, we have to replace it with something else, right? And so the introduced conflict is now a Romulan ship is on its way
because they attempted to communicate with the now dead Romulan.
And are like, oh, what the hell happened to that guy?
Well, before he gets found, we better go hustle him off of that planet.
But the enterprise is an orbit and it intercepts that message,
and now shit is going down.
Yeah, this is Commander Tomalok of the Romulan Empire,
and he is coming in hot,
demanding that they turn over the guy
to them by meeting up in the neutral zone.
Picard is insistent that Tomlock
ship not into Federation space.
And Tomlock is doing a lot of excellent
Romulining around where he, you know,
every inconsistency has like an excellent explanation.
Like, oh, we wouldn't have been there
if we'd known there was a Federation ship there.
We would never want to start a conflict
of any kind.
He's sort of only vaguely threatening, which I think makes him an effective character.
He's like anyone we've met before.
Always a chess game with the Romulans.
He really likes that close up FaceTime.
You ever talk to someone on FaceTime and they hold the phone just way too close to their
face?
That's Tom Locke for you right there.
Yeah, it's a wide S lens on FaceTime. You don't want that way too close to their face. Yeah. That's Tom Locke for you right there. Yeah, it's a wide S lens on FaceTime.
You don't want that shit that close to your face.
He's got the real meat beard look going too.
It's shadowed a little low.
He is a more fully fleshed out Romulan character
than we've ever had.
And that includes the two Romulans that we meet,
you know, on the planet surface and in the six bay.
Like they are pretty one note characters, like just kind of menacing bad guy characters.
Tom Oloch is great.
Like he's a really fun character to watch.
And an excellent antagonist for Picard, who is like a real plane dealer and doesn't really put up with bullshit and
Tomalock is like so skilled at throwing bullshit down all over the place. Yeah, Tomalock is like wearing a suit of bullshit
So the enterprise is dealing with this
growing concern in orbit so back in the planet surface
with a newly blind
Jordi, he's down there with this backroom character. Backroom who has no legs,
Jordi who has no eyes. They've got to figure out a way out of this cave into
this signal that Wesley set up. Right. There's since Jordi's visor isn't
working, they have to rig it up in a way where they can kind of use it as like a compass
to find the neutrino fountain. I didn't really expect Jority to go through stages of grief the way
he did. It really felt like he was ready to die as soon as he lost his eyesight. Yeah.
I mean, and they have an interesting conversation about that too. The Romulan is really surprised that his parents allowed him to live past infancy with crippling
disability like blindness.
Now what do you race this week?
You waste time and resources on defective children.
That's some interesting world building.
The Romulans do not have the same kind of values surrounding their children as members
of the Federation or at least humans.
It's amazing how much world building you can do with a single line.
Like, it says so much about a culture with a single line of dialogue.
Totally.
And he's real like, the actor really like sold the shit out of it too.
He's really perplexed and kind of disgusted
that somebody would be allowed to live that was blind.
Yeah, and he's also the hero of the moment.
He's like, fuck this, Jordy.
I actually intend to survive.
If you're just gonna be a little whiny bitch,
give me your tricorder and I'll try figuring it out,
or maybe you could help, you know, like you could talk me through it.
Yeah. Because I've got some good eyes here.
Yeah, and I've never used your strange federation technology,
so I could use an expert.
And they wind up forming a team, and they make it to the thing,
and they basically get beamed up just
in time to stop the enterprise and the Romulan Warbird from starting lighting each other
up. It's real tense because like they're close enough to lighting each other up that
Picard has to like tail, tomalock very specifically. I am lowering my shield so that I can beam up your guy and my guy.
And please don't destroy my ship.
Yeah.
But please be cool.
Nobody's gonna hurt anybody.
We're all gonna be like three little fans, he's here.
And to Tomlock's credit, he's cool.
Right, I am going to bend over and pick up the soap now.
Ha, ha, ha, now. You stay over there.
Yeah.
I need this soap.
I am going to reach into the glove compartment and take out the registration for my car.
Yeah, exactly.
I am a beautiful, there are full lights.
The episode ends with sort of crisis averted.
Tomlock does not choose to light up the enterprise.
Right.
Picard Beams, Bachram and Jordi directly to the bridge,
both of whom are just totally filthy.
Yeah, I get a lot of poopy on the bridge.
They're the kids who played in the mud puddle
and then walked around inside,
tracking mud all over the carpet.
Like, totally.
They're, they're a filthy mess.
How lucky does Picard feel that the transporter beam didn't scoop up some of the ground material like it did with the space Irish?
Yeah, no kidding.
So the very end of the episode,
Bachmann, Jordi on the bridge, Tomalok sees this, Tomalok is satisfied that a survivor
is on his way back to his own ship.
Bachram is satisfied that Jordi's alive and they might have brokered a strange piece in
the process.
Yeah, I mean, there was a lot of goodwill at the end of the day.
Yeah.
Bachram is like, wharf, take Bachram and Jordi to the transportor room,
and then the episode ends.
Right.
I wanted to be in that lift, man.
I wanted to be in the turbo lift.
Right.
Because you had a half an hour of Worf's inner conflict
where he's just hating Romulans,
and you let's one die on his watch.
And there was at least three minutes of what is Warf
do when he finds out that one of them saves the life of one of his
buds on the crew. We don't get that extra moment that I thought
would have been really great for his character. Yeah, like if
Tarantino had written that moment, Warf would have like
lorded the death of the guy's comrade over him. Right. If I don't
know, I feel like if Spielberg had directed it, it would have been kind of
like wharf having a really like emotional like realization that he needs to not be such
a racist.
Yeah.
Man, like a 30 second turbo lift ride and then we watch him beam away and that's when
the credits roll.
I think that would have been a great button.
But as it was, it was like, good job.
Welcome to the transport room.
And then we're out.
It was so close to being great.
And that sort of drove me crazy.
Well, I'm sorry.
It's not your fault, Ben.
Hey, Adam.
Yes, Ben.
Did you find a drunk Shimoda in this episode?
I don't know if I've ever asked you, have I?
I don't think you've ever asked.
I'm really off balance by the question.
Drunk Shimoda is a recognition we give a character in every episode who is acting the most
like an inebriated baby. In this episode, I am bestowing that great honor on
Warp because it just seemed so much more in keeping with his character that
instead of letting him die, he would have given that dying Romulan the fuck you
of injecting his blood into him. Like that is the ultimate fuck you. Like this guy
has to live the rest of his life knowing
that my creepy, cling on blood is in him.
Like that just seems like the more badass of the moves.
And that seems to be a, like,
that's a level of revenge I would assume that Wurf has,
that he'd be perfectly fine with.
Totally.
And so that kind of surprised me.
So I'm gonna give it to Wurf.
Like I feel like he could know better in that moment
Yeah, I mean I guess he gets on the good side of Beverly in Picard and everyone else who's trying to twist his arm and doing it like
Not only does he get to satisfy the guilt trips of everyone around him. He gets ultimate revenge. Yeah
Yeah, I'm I'm kind of right there with you. I guess, um, I had Jordy written down just for like a couple of the times when he got a
little, a little whiny on the planet's surface, but I think that, I think you're probably
right.
That morph is in fact the Drunk Shemota.
Well, the thing about Drunk Shemota is there is no right or wrong answer.
No, I think that, I think that every time we are both right. Sure. And I think you're
more right this time. I don't want to be wrong. Jordy really, I mean, there are a couple of aliens
parallels in this episode. One of them is the LV426 description, which was perfect by you. And the
other one is Jordy's sort of slow spiral into the Hicks character when shit really goes down.
Game Over, man!
I think he's ready to give up.
Not only that, like he's ready to give up when he goes blind.
He also tells the Romulan that he can't really think of a situation where he'd be willing
to die rather than be captured.
It's a little melee mouthed about that too.
Fair. I've got questions about his commitment
to the Federation.
A greatest-gen live show is something you don't want to miss. Why? Well, it's a great opportunity
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Let's do it!
The Sherry Reembarishment Tour is coming in August 2023, and we've got a bunch of dates
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That's GreatestGenTour.com for dates and ticketing information for the Share Your Embarrassment
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I'm Jordan Morris.
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On Jordan Jesse Go, we make pure, delightful nonsense.
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We get stupid with Judy Greer.
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Come get stupider with us at MaximumFun.org.
Look, your podcast apps are already open.
Just pull it out.
Give Jordan Jesse Goatry.
Being smart is hard.
Be dumb instead.
Oh, rats.
Hey, hey, hey, oh, I'm glad I found you in mine.
These clouds are really freaking me out.
I hate having to stand in line.
And boy, what do I?
These giraffes do not smell good.
No, they do not, and they've such short naps.
But I'm hearing we need to get on this off.
Gotta get on the art. It is about do not, and they've such short neck. But I'm hearing we need to get on this arc. We've got to get on the arc.
It is about terrain, about a spout to destroy humanity.
Hey, oh, sorry, sorry, sorry.
Are you Noah?
Yeah, I know we look like humans.
We're actually, we're podcasters.
We are podcasters, so it's different.
Have you heard of Ono Ross and Kerry?
We investigate spirituality, claims of the paranormal,
stuff like that.
And you have a boat and say the world's gonna end,
so seem like something for us to check out.
We would love to be on the boats.
We came two by two.
What do you think?
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[♪ OUTRO MUSIC PLAYING [♪
I am La Cuita's aboard. You are aboard.
Hey Ben.
What's that, Adam?
What do we have coming up for our next episode?
Our next episode is season three episode eight the price
Councillor Troy is swept off her feet by a dashing delegate that uses unethical methods to conduct his business on board the USS Enterprise
I have no idea what that even means
Yeah, I don't either this is one of those episodes that's just been completely erased.
I'm not even gonna lie.
I feel like the descriptions,
like I don't remember there being
an episode about that.
What the fuck?
I feel like maybe for once a season,
someone gets on board the ship
that does weird mind shit to Troy.
Yeah, it's like, either she's tormented
by ice cream truck music,
or like I remember
one guy with like a weird forehead mask like who would come to her in dreams and just sort
of torment her. Yeah, and it was like a rape metaphor, right? Yeah, yeah. I don't know if that's
this episode or not, but it seems like there's always one a season. Yeah, I mean, I don't know that this might be that episode who knows, but yeah, gross.
Yeah, I have to watch it.
Alright.
Hey Ben.
Yeah.
Did you know that this episode and every other episode is brought to us by the generous donations
from listeners, like the ones that are brought to us by the generous donations from listeners,
like the ones that are listening to us right now.
I did know that it is a totally non-trivial amount of work that we put into this every week.
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It feels so good to have everybody out there listening that is enthusiastic enough about
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You can also talk to us on the Twitters
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I, you know, we just have great listeners who talk
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People are making bumper stickers,
they're making songs, they're making videos.
Yeah.
We had a great video that got sent to us today,
the this old enterprise video.
Yeah, that was so good.
That was awesome.
You throw away a bit in an episode and you think that that's just going to be what it
is and it has a life of its own.
It's awesome.
Yeah, so cool.
Well, thank you so much for listening.
Thanks to Dark Veteria for our music.
And with that, we will be back at you next time with another great episode of Star Trek the Next Generation and also a very unethical episode of the greatest generation. Make it sound. Make it sound.
You'll be got to got to got to got to.
With that, we will be back at you next week with...
We will be back at you next time with another great episode of Star Trek the next day.
We'll be back at you next time with another great episode of Star Trek the Star Trek's Next Generation, and also a very unethical episode of the greatest generation.
I think between those three takes at the end.
I think you've got enough to put something together.
Yeah.
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