The Headgum Podcast - 138: Spiked Chowder
Episode Date: January 20, 2023Allie, Dane, and Joel join Geoff to discuss Aaron Taylor-Johnson's love affairs and air out their grievances towards the movie Titanic (1997). The Pit Wall has been greenlit! Subscribe on yo...ur favorite podcast app so you don't miss new episodes dropping every Wednesday after a race. Advertise on The Headgum Podcast via Gumball.fm Rate The Headgum Podcast 5-stars on Apple Podcasts Rate The Headgum Podcast 5-stars on Spotify Join the Headgum DiscordSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
This is a HeadGum Original.
I've never started out by saying this, but this whole show is gonna be Dawes.
What's that?
What does Dawes mean?
There we go.
That. That's it.
That's it.
Everybody.
Everybody.
Let's get into it.
Get started.
Get started.
Get started.
Let's get it started.
Let's get it started.
Sorry, Marika.
Sorry, Marty.
No YouTube ad revenue, which I did historically think was negligible.
And Marika said it's not.
So it's at least a couple hundred dollars an episode.
And that's down the drain because I just used copyrighted music. We've got Joel Dunoff returning to the show, arguably for too often, you're a guest.
Ali Khan always a joy.
And we've got Dane Cardiel on the show
for the first time in a year.
Here's the thing.
Dane being upstate makes me forget that he's an option.
Right?
And then somebody tweeted at Dane and said,
when are you going to be on the HeadGum Podcast?
And Dane expressed enthusiasm for being here.
And I always want people who, you know, it's not pulling teeth to get them on the show.um podcast? And Dane expressed enthusiasm for being here. And I always want people who, you know,
it's not pulling teeth to get them on the show.
So we've got Dane on the show.
This episode comes out tomorrow.
So what's that?
Oh, I said hell yeah.
Just unaffirmative, yes.
Love that.
What's that?
This is, you know what?
Maybe this show should be one of those podcasts
where it's like, oh, guests don't talk
until I introduce you.
You introduced us already.
But you did introduce us.
Allie, what's too much money to spend on a necklace?
I guess it's all relative based on your bank account.
Okay, percentage wise.
So let's say you make $70,000 a year.
How much of that should be? What's that? I said, okay so let's say you make seventy thousand dollars a year how much of that should be what's that i said okay how much do you make i can't ask you can't
tell me i feel like and dan you can speak to this is like employee solidarity like let's fucking
talk about this stuff because i got a raise two years or yeah almost two years ago year and a half
ago and it was because of dane because dane sat me down he said look this is what you could be
making because producers at iheartartRadio make this much.
You can use that stat.
I should bleep all this out, huh?
Because you told me also not to tell anybody that you told me that.
No, no, no.
We can talk about this.
Again, employers holidays.
I think it's good to talk about these things.
Absolutely.
And I think you actually negotiated below what I recommended.
I did because I couldn't go from what I was making to what you said I should make because that's like an over 200% increase.
But now you're a CBS showcase.
You got a lot of things going for you.
They barely paid us anything and I had to work for four months straight.
But it looks good.
It looks great.
Yeah, it looks great.
Joel, you make what?
$110,000?
Jeff, also your raise was before inflation.
You have to think about that too
like time to run your money bud oh so you're encouraging me to ask for another raise i just
feel like i'm on thin ice every year it should be at least like three percent three to five percent
but with inflation you're probably you know justified asking for a ten percent raise at least
maybe next year i feel like you have to ask around the end of the year.
For most people, it's every year.
For you, it's every three and a half years.
Yeah.
What's that times 1.03?
It's not worth. That's a dollar
an hour. It's not worth it.
To answer your question, I personally
wouldn't spend more than $100
on a necklace
i think i spent eighty dollars on a bracelet once do you love it as a gift for myself
it was an elliou thing like one of those harry styles johns uh and i'm using the word john because we got joel in the house i'll stay i'll thumbs up it thumbs up it yeah um we've got a lot to get to um but
i want to take our time with it i want to you know ease into it i want there to be a texture
to this episode dane came into the zoom he said i'm uh what did you say you're in high spirits
today nothing could break your spirit yeah i feel great let's put it in a great week yeah let's see what if we can break dane on this
episode um what's what are you guys's yeah what are you guys's like i'm not new year's resolutions
but intentions for the new year like in a word or maybe more well the tweet that i i sent out was
just about like uh how good this year feels in the conversations that i'm having like people are like
really you know work stuff is important but you know we're not just work what's like personal
well-being friends and family side projects i feel like there's a lot of good energy toward like that
balance yeah absolutely yeah i agree i think it has a good uh it has a good energy your intention
is to find that work-life balance and foster your hobbies then no i have a pretty good work-life
balance i feel like i can like operate at like 70 in my in my role which is like which actually
is difficult to do i think for a lot of people like a lot of people role, which is like... Which actually is difficult to do, I think, for a lot of people.
Like a lot of people that I know are like,
I'm fucking exhausted by my job.
And I'm like, yeah, but I also hear you talking about it
and thinking about it all the time.
Like 10 p.m., you've been off work for four hours.
I responded to your Slack message for this thing
at one o'clock in the morning my time.
That's true. That's true.
That's true.
I was I was a little drunk because it's kind of been a fun week for me.
But, Joel, what are your what are your intentions?
Is it is it mostly sexual or is it, you know, more about work or is it more about play?
Obviously, there's a lot of sexual stuff to get to in the next 11 and a half months.
This week's been a little crazy obviously starting the year off right sexually but i'm figure out what to pack my argentina trip my apartment yes you're going to argentina for a
night so a lot going on um obviously was happy to make the time for this but there's you know a lot of packing a lot of
purchasing a lot of setting up all that sort of stuff any dates before argentina the next 48 hours
no but i mean hey we're hosting a party so who knows what could happen who's we your roommates
yes oh yeah you have a going away party i did hear that and i was like how how long is he going
to be gone for because i was like if you're gone for like 10 days or less like you're an
asshole for doing yeah it's a weekend it's a weekend trip you asshole no it's for a month
right it's for a month but then also it's my roommate's birthday and then also are even more
of an asshole to encroach on their birthday. It's their birthday and now suddenly Joel's going away, John?
Yeah, to be clear, it's Joel's going away, John, and also Simone's birthday that weekend.
Okay.
All right.
And then our debatable third roommate, meaning the person who's subletting my room, or debatable fourth roommate, my friend Anisha, who's subletting our room, is dropping
a new song tomorrow too.
So, release party, perhaps?
You gotta have whiter friends.
Go on.
I'm just saying, like,
you gotta have, like, where are the
Shongs?
Damn! Damn! you gotta have like like where are the shongs damn that would have made a mere laugh
that would have made a mere laugh i think everyone here is a little too socially informed
uh myself included which is why i'm gonna cut that out
Which is why I'm going to cut that out.
Allie, intentions for the new year.
What do you got?
My New Year's resolutions are always really small and achievable.
And like last year, it was to actually start washing my face every night before I went to bed.
I was pretty lax.
This year, my goal is to
finally nail down...
I guess it's all skincare related. I want to finally have
a regimen.
Can I pick a shoe?
Joel, shut the mic up for a second.
Can I pick a shoe? No, mine's important actually.
Allie, I
screenshotted your Instagram story of your
New Year's resolutions
Illegal
I wanted to go back to it because I liked it
My ins and outs
That's really nice
Your ins and outs were really good
Thank you
How many screens had the ins?
I thought about it yesterday because I did leave the house
after a really long time
and I thought, oh, that was one of my things
That was my only goal, just leave the house after a really long time and I thought oh that was one of my things I just that was my only goal just leave the house once a day that's fine
so it's it's really hard to get you to go anywhere I'm not I'm not like I'm not an easy hang
that's really rude to yourself I think I think you're a joyful hang
you mean easy to nail down not yeah i'm not easy
okay i'm not like yeah wow i'd like to think i'm an easy conversationalist but i'm not it's not
easy to get me to leave the house and i'm trying to be better about that maybe that's another one
along with my regimen cerevi. Cleanse the bish.
Moisturizer, easy.
Little under eye cream if you're like me with a little bit of bags.
Top it all off with a vitamin C serum.
That's all you need.
That is all you need.
You're missing a critical piece here.
Joy?
Sunscreen.
Sunscreen.
Yeah, you're supposed to do that.
I don't know.
I'm brown.
Hot take. I kind brown. Hot take.
I kind of like eye bags.
I think they're...
Thank you, Pete Davidson.
Thank you, Machine Gun Kelly.
Now I can take the sunglasses off.
Yeah, if you look tired, I'll probably think you're more attractive.
That's huge for me. First time all year you've taken the sunglasses off. Yeah, if you look tired, I'll probably think you're more attractive. That's huge for me.
First time all year you've taken the sunglasses off, right, Jeff?
Because I've been crying.
Because I've been depressed as shit, right?
Well, it's only helping the overall cause, your attractiveness.
Yeah.
We have to move on.
I think it'd be fun to actually dive into those ins and outs because, Ali, they were very good.
And I know that a lot of people, but not everyone who watches this show follows you on instagram so i think we should dive into that after the ad break but uh let's keep it going
with everybody's i mean i i don't know we're in this limbo where it feels sorry limb bond where
it feels like we all know it's going to be aaron taylor johnson so i don't want to be an idiot and not say him uh i also learned something about him
today which is that when he was 18 years old he started dating a 42 year old so i don't know i
think that that's not cool maybe that's like one of those age gaps that's like maybe he was groomed
a little bit because also that was his boss on this film um because i saw on twitter that like
there's these rumors that he and joey
king had an affair which i think are not true but everybody's just kind of like cheating's bad
unless you're dating someone 20 years your senior um so yeah that's my bond of the week is aaron
taylor johnson but maybe a single aaron aaron taylor johnson maybe once he's Bond, he'll kind of regain that childhood whimsy that he lost when he started
dating Sam.
Joel?
Sorry.
I'm going to go with
Reeve Carney.
Who? I love Reeve Carney!
I was being made fun of by Marika
and others for not knowing who the
actors of any of the Spider-Mans were
and then
I was like oh I really liked Reeve Carney
when I saw that in 7th grade and Marika's like
oh you haven't seen the Spider-Man movie
but you saw the Broadway show in 7th grade
he was also one of the leads in uh hadestown
yeah sorry i do not know this face and you know what when i saw house of gucci in theater he made
a brief cameo and there was one person sitting behind me who gasped and then went is that reef
carney and i was like i have one other person in this movie theater that i could talk about this with that's very funny he's hot pain um i would go with any member of boy genius
oh yeah r.i.p david crosby i tweeted this earlier i don't think it was funny enough to keep up so i
deleted it instantly but david cros, he died the way he lived,
trying to divert attention away from Phoebe Bridgers.
Because the Boy Genius cover came out tonight.
Or today.
I didn't think he died.
I am a huge Crosby, Sills, and Ash fan.
Honestly, a huge fan of his solo music.
I think he's a bad person, but R.I.P.
Well, he died today.
He died today, for real. real um yeah shout out phoebe and uh i think she'd be probably go with lucy i'd probably you know land
on lucy more more so than the others that's a good move i think phoebe's great i love her music but i
think she's a little oversaturated and i think a lucy dus Bond. Nobody's fucking seeing that coming.
What's the other person's name?
Julian Baker.
Yeah.
She's too sad.
She's too sad to be Bond. She made tattoos.
Yeah.
The in post issues of that.
Yeah.
But again, she could be the gadgets person.
There you go.
Maybe they're all Bond.
Actually, they're sisters.
Or lovers. Yeah. maybe they're all bond actually they're they're sisters or lovers
yeah um ally who's your bond of the week my bond of the week is inspired by the calendar behind me
which is for her be fully loaded i saw on tiktok that it calendars from 2006 the dates match up with 2023 so i went on ebay so my bond of the week is lindsey
lohan that's you know that's like maybe the best bond of the week in history
your your new year's resolution is to live 2023 as if it's 2026 or 2006
yeah i'm buying all low-rise pants again. Watch out, world.
It's not a bad move.
I think that that's a really interesting way to back your way into having a Bond pick.
I always get Herbie Fully Loaded confused
with a blackout drunk Herbie Hancock.
I don't know who Herbie Hancock is.
Do you guys?
Wired asks,
does dry January really make people healthier?
Abstaining from alcohol can have immediate benefits,
but lasting gains is where you make lasting change.
You know, I actually have a...
Fuck you guys!
I have a thought about this,
which is over Christmas break,
I was hanging out with my two friends
at a parent's house.
And one of his favorite things to do
when he's at his parent's house,
maybe you're a little high, whatever, is turn on Fox News.
Take advantage of having cable.
I haven't heard anything you've said because you really just have learned to power through the bullshit on the show.
And it's impressive.
It's impressive to be.
What did you actually say?
Sorry.
So just know that me and a few of my friends were a little high.
We're watching Fox News, mostly for the ads because they're just incredible.
If no one's ever seen the late night Fox News ads.
Turns out there was this like show on.
I want to say it was called Gutfeld.
And we're like two minutes into watching it.
And I'm like, this is essentially the HeadGum podcast.
No.
This guy, he shows like a screen he's like uh you know 30 of
adults report that they spend more time than they really need to in the bathroom just to avoid their
family thoughts the only difference is the follow-on jokes from the other people present are far more off color.
Yeah.
So, you know, they're like, oh, you would, too, if you lived with my wife or whatever.
Well, that's funny.
Yeah.
That's just comedy.
Yeah.
But anyway, I was like, hey, this is like kind of similar.
And I know you've struggled explaining it to people.
So you could be like, hey, it's kind of like the fox gutfeld yeah what does gutfeld mean is that
somebody's name i think he's like some former wrestler guy weird um per vulture 25 years later
no one knows who spiked the titanic chowder oh pcp i didn't even know that was a thing this i can speak on yeah
i couldn't please it was you
uh guilty i did a thing that would be so funny if that's how they came out with it
did a thing yeah um i think it was a i i rumors i think are pointing to a disgruntled crew member who hated James Cameron.
But the most important piece of that story that's really important to include is that the old woman, old Rose, who drops the necklace at the end, not involved, had a different lunch that day.
And how do you know that fact?
Because I've read every article about this incident.
Okay.
It was obviously my first question.
Like, what about this lady?
Yeah.
I don't want her to trip and not realize it more than anybody else.
In a submarine?
Were they underwater or above water?
Okay, so it happened their last day of filming in Nova Scotia.
There's like no underwater scenes, but.
No, no.
But there was a crew.
Well, I remember a disgruntled crew member who just like poured a ton of PCP into the shared crew lunch, which was chowder.
Disgusting.
It's disgusting.
So everybody ate their chowder and then tripped balls the rest of the day
and it was like an intense spectrum of reactions like some people were vomiting off the side of
the fake ship there was like a conga line going through like every some people were weeping some
people were like i think making out like it was just a crazy drug adult like fest aboard the titanic which by the way for shooting they
only could make half of the boats it's so expensive so it's really half the shit i mean
you can die from having too much pcp right probably that's that's fucked up no it was that's
that's a that prank couldn't happen now
That prank couldn't happen now.
Cancel culture. What are you saying?
You couldn't make The Office nowadays,
and you couldn't spike Chowder with PCP anymore.
No, I don't think...
I think it's now officially uncouth,
but back then you could get away with much more.
Until about a third of the way through that,
I thought we were talking about
this got spiked on the actual
titanic me too at first but then i remembered the story that i read like three weeks ago
why didn't the people at jonestown or in jonestown uh drink Jones, the soda.
They could have spiked anything, is my point.
Or like a malt.
You know, it's your last meal.
It's your last drink.
You don't want to have like a milkshake.
Have you ever worked at a concession stand?
I worked at a cafe.
Making malts is really time intensive.
For that big of a village, got to stick to powder.
I mean, they're about to die. Like they have literally all the time in the world that colleague leader's not taking the time to
like whip up multiple blenders to satisfy everybody with a mole it's just not practical
jeff oh shit oh shit nobody's ever talked to me like that before. You've humbled me this day.
During when I first moved to L.A. and I was very unemployed and had so much time on my hands,
I knew it was really time to, like, figure it out when I went to the Museum of Death on a Monday morning.
I was like, don't open up this place, Allie. Don't.
Are you feeling better now yeah no i've since gotten
a job and i'm doing better but yeah did you get there before the hours opened oh yeah i was like
sorry my computer's lagging and so that should have happened three seconds earlier
the zoom is fine i was door
outside waiting for them to unlock so i could go learn incredible um according to grub street gen
z is housing en masse martinis hither than thither left and right what is your guys's cocktail cocktail of choice let's start with joel i like a classic whiskey sour whiskey ginger
something that makes people think you know what you're doing that's cool
i go with a um mescal old-fashioned and everyone will drink everyone loves when I say it. It's just like, it is the drink.
It is cool.
I feel like that's also blending your environs, right?
Because you're from San Diego, kind of a mezcal, or at least Southern California, because I haven't lived in San Diego.
But it's like a very mezcal town, LA at least.
So I assume that that extends to Southern California.
And then I feel like New York City for sure, but also upstate, it's kind of more of an old-fashioned territory. You've blended the two. I would say Dane Cartier is a mezcal old-fashioned.
Time to take a quick break.
Guys, taking care of your health isn't always easy, right?
But it should be simple.
That's why for the last three years I've been taking AG1,
just one scoop and a cup of water mixed around every day, no exceptions.
And it helps me feel, you know, energized, focused, ready to take on the day. Like I'm doing one powerfully healthy habit
that's also powerfully simple.
I know that AG1 gives my body high quality nutrition
because every batch goes through a rigorous testing process
so that you know it's safe.
And their ingredients are sourced for potency,
absorption, and nutrient density,
all of which is very important
and you don't always get with other
leading nutrition brands. I like to drink it first thing in the morning. I'll have a glass of water.
I'll have my AG1 and then I'll have my coffee and it gets me set off to take on the day and to be
centered and to feel like I did at least one good thing for my health. And if you do that every day,
it has compounding effects.
If there's one product I had to recommend to elevate your health, it's AG1.
That's why we partnered with them for so long.
So if you want to take ownership of your health, start with AG1.
Try AG1 and get a free one-year supply of vitamin D3K2
and five free AG1 travel packs with your first purchase
exclusively at drinkag1.com slash what's that? Again, that at drinkag1.com slash what's that?
Again, that's drinkag1.com slash what's that? Check it out.
And we're back. You know, when you're hosting the show, you kind of have to be like,
what's a good cut point, right? What's an edit point? What's the funniest thing that's
been said for 10 minutes? And that's the best thing to like go to the break on you know what i mean do we get to hear ali's drink though
well yeah let's cut the let's cut the ad right before ali gets a chance
what is your drink of choice con uh similarly to joel i like a whiskey ginger ale i dated a guy
once in college who introduced me to that drink and it's the one
thing i took from that brief relationship so now like i genuinely like it but then when i have it
i'm like memories uh a harvard study found that deep relationships quote unquote are the key to
a longer life um how do you guys develop and then foster and nurture deep
relationships? Let's start with Joel.
You know, it
takes doing the work.
You gotta show up.
It takes consistency. Consistency is
key. You gotta
reach out to people. You know, you can't always
be waiting for people to reach out to you. You gotta
text them, hey, what are you up to this week let's make dinner together um
you're texting you do it are you asking that sorry yeah that was rude um continue
i i got nothing else. You gotta not.
You gotta pay attention to people when they're talking.
That helps.
Something that's in for me this year
is a pop-in.
But
you need to have the deep relationship
I think for the pop-in to work.
So like
the quantity of pop-ins I can do in 2023 will correlate to the deep
relationships that I have.
Like just going to someone's house and saying,
Hey,
and hanging out for an hour or two.
That is frightening.
I think to 99% of Americans today.
Yeah.
We got it.
We got to do more Poppins.
I like that actually.
Cause one of the best nights that I,
not nights, uh, afternoons that I had last fall was my friend Sarah was like, hey, my washer dryer is broken.
Can I come over and do laundry at your place?
She comes over.
My other friend was going to come over anyways and we're going to get lunch.
And then we're just like, because of Sarah's poppin, we just all got lunch.
It was great.
I said, that's really nice yeah it is earnestly
nice yeah i i agree with both of you guys i i think it's it love is a verb it's about active
intent and i'm a big fan of small acts of service coupled with like, you know, a heart to heart, then I know we're really
good friends. And I'm pretty it's I'm I'm pretty I'm an overshare. And it's easy for me to just
say things about myself very fast and the hope that, you know, maybe we'll see what sticks.
But when I have someone else reciprocate that and meet me trying to go, then I feel like we
are in a shared place of understanding and intent
absolutely i'm the same way of like i i kind of lost interest in surface level friendships
and some people just can't give you that which is fine but you know setting your own boundaries i'm
like i don't want i can't be friends with you in the way that you think we're friends i can be like
i know that person we're not
friends because we don't participate in a shared vulnerability right i don't know anything about
you jack i don't like friend breakups though i think that's super cringe like like sitting down
with a friend and saying we can no longer be friends i've never done that in my life
me either i've seen that as like a trend like you just like part ways but this whole
like oh i thought this was a deep relationship it wasn't reciprocated so i need to tell you
you're no longer a person in my life uh move on sweetie joel are you listening
that was you telling me to move on
here we go i can't share my screen right now because my i'm afraid my laptop's gonna
freak out but here's the audio it's the unsinking of the titanic time to coincide with the movie's
25th anniversary the film's director is trying to finally slam the door on that age-old question about the door.
Jack!
Did Rose hog it when Jack could have fit?
Room on that door for a family of four,
argue critics, adding pooches to prove the point.
But now Nat Geo presents a scientific reenactment.
Jack! Using stunt doubles plastered with sensors But now Nat Geo presents a scientific reenactment.
Jack!
Using stunt doubles plastered with sensors floundering in cold water, this is the teaser,
they consulted an expert on hypothermia.
Within eight minutes, Jack would have been unconscious in that position.
And by the way, director James Cameron told reporters,
it's technically not a door.
It's a piece of paneling from the first class lounge.
Yeah, well, whatever it was, it's been put to the test before. I think Jack's death was needless.
Mythbusters determined that if only they'd tied Rose's life jacket underneath the wood,
the additional buoyancy could have supported them both.
But director Cameron was unmomoved he has to die the dude's going down cameron compares it to
romeo and juliet in the famous line you say i'll never let you go jack i'll never let go
i promise but you do i lie this is one movie controversy that just won't sink.
Colbert and Kate Winslet.
Come on, darling, there's room for two.
Have already done their own reenactment and no lifeboats were needed.
All hands on desk.
GenieMos.
CNN.
New York.
Comments? I don't know i would have never thought to tie the life jacket underneath the the wood i too many steps yeah
that's a weird thing for mythbusters to be like they should have just done this thing everyone
would have thought of i wouldn't have thought of No, I'm not taking off my life jacket.
That seems to be step one.
Yeah.
You know, I don't know.
I guess this is more of a Titanic.
Sorry.
No, it's I just I've.
He was going to die.
And what is she supposed to do?
He's dead.
Keep his body there and hang out
swim over to the captain with him to go get the whistle that was never gonna happen i really can't
agree more with ali right now it's kind of i bet her life was better too after the fact
honestly like that was a fling that was a moment that was a summer camp rendezvous
she had much better relationship
yeah who cares about jack
holy shit
I guess this dateline I don't know where that came from
but
that was Jeannie Moose.
My favorite CNN reporter.
Or at least top three.
That's really sweet of you.
To rank them.
Constantly, yeah.
That was it for News of the Day.
The rest was just waxing.
I was wondering maybe we could talk about your ins and outs, Allie.
Do you want to read them out and then we can discuss?
Because they were earnestly very good.
Everybody did them this year, which I did not like.
Yours were good.
And I mean that truly.
Yours were the only ones that I was like, oh, this is funny.
Or that's actually poignant.
I agree with that.
That's cool.
You seemed like an arbiter, at least of taste, but if not a lot of different other things.
Let me try to find it if anyone else wants to go.
I mean, hey, maybe I got this screenshot on deck.
You have it?
Pulled it up already?
Oh, my gosh.
Come on, guys.
Oh, I actually have it.
Okay.
Okay.
Number one. In in in for 2023 expanded flower budget important i agree you got it what's that i was gonna i was gonna ask like what's your routine
though is it like you know a sunday you know before the farmer's market is it a random tuesday
i'll do so i love a sunday flower at the farmer's market but also anytime i'm at the grocery store
when i yeah in my cart it always makes me feel better after and then i feel like i'm living in
my house is now a home and my house i need a party i like to imagine ali walking through a gelson's
airpods in just like it's time to make your house your home pick up the phone and then
yeah you grab a bouquet of peonies uh
number two dinner parties the pacing of this episode is crazy like somehow somehow i'm the host now
i have a thought on this although you know i'll jump in um personal chef dinner parties
yeah that is like a good power move i, where it's like not that much more expensive.
Yeah, than getting takeout, yeah.
Well, it's going to be expensive,
but like it's an experience that I think would be as expensive
as a nice restaurant, right?
Yeah.
Dan, I feel like you live the life that I want to live
when I'm your age.
I haven't done a dinner party yet like that but
I've been to one
it was lovely
well you live where I want to live when I'm in my 30s
I guess is my point
well I might be renting my house
by then so
that could work
that could work out
what's your dress?
I almost gave it.
Okay.
Oh, okay. I found it.
If we want it. Joel has had it.
You didn't believe me?
What?
You didn't believe that these were actually on your list after I said them?
No, I believed them.
I was like, when I remember
doing flowers as the first one and
when you said it i went oh in my head oh yeah uh what's next what's the second one
um second one was dinner parties i'm just gonna choose the other ones that i like yeah what do
you like uh aperitivos that was one of them important yeah important imported we're talking italian amaro
amari rather uh for the road slash ages well maybe not for the road because it is alcohol
you've also already done the large sunglasses one yeah i'm over tiny sunglasses i don't look
good in them yeah these are too wide for my face continue I liked well I liked niche
movie nights because I had a watch party last year because I was realized I'd never seen Les
Mis the movie and I was like when the hell am I ever gonna take the time to do this it's like a
four-hour thing yeah I would do it as if I, like, created an event around it. So I invited a bunch of people to my house to watch Les Mis, and I only served a loaf of bread.
Yeah.
Great.
It was really fun.
That's very funny.
I like when people do shit like that.
My friends just did, like, a Heather's Table read for no reason.
Yeah.
Awesome.
And I had a panic attack, so I didn't end up going.
Oh, no.
But that's that cool stuff. I don't end up going but that's that cool stuff
I don't know why I said it like that
that's the cool shit
that's awesome
Joel what else you got
what else does Allie have we should say
search for a signature scent
do you guys have a signature scent
Allie have you found it yet
no I'm
always looking though. I keep trying things
and I have a lot of...
I have to figure out a budget
situation because perfume is great.
It's so expensive. And I'm very
scared to take a risk.
Don't forget you have to stand at the flower budget.
Yeah.
But at least perfume lasts.
Flowers are fleeting. I'm not arguing for perfume over flowers
i just think you can justify the price a little bit more here's what i'll also say layer right
because everybody wears you know certain things and you know everybody smells the same you got
a layer so it's like that smells good and like there's one thing i've smelled before but there's
that extra little sauce right it's that salt that Salt Bae thing, which Dane and I understand because people come up to us on the street.
They say, are you Salt Bae?
We say, how dare you?
Absolutely not.
That's why Dane lived upstate because he got it too much on the streets of Brooklyn.
You got to get away from all the attention.
Citrus herbal musk for me.
Everybody's trudging through the humidity of me today.
No, not at all.
I'm so impressed.
No, definitely at all.
And it's impressive.
Citrus herbal musk?
Yes.
It's great.
It smells good.
But I need a scent, too.
But that's probably 2024 for me to be honest
i would love i would love to be maybe that's my new goal my my resolution for this year is i want
to be someone where you walk by and someone goes you smell really good yeah i mean that's like one
of the hottest things that anyone can do with Yucash it's true
yeah I want
I'm gonna buy pheromones
yeah Dunoff
no one's ever said that to me
are you okay
me neither
I'm not
so into the I've never had a signature scent i like always buy deodorant and
wear it 75 of the days and that's that
i did have that that that that phase of like in high school where if i use cologne that's going to increase my chances with women what a uh it was a traumatic experience probably why i don't go back to
cologne or anything like that because it's just skeeby there was a really powerful and beautiful
time in 2007 when i feel like all of the boys in my grade smelled like holl and Abercrombie stores. Yeah.
I fell prey to the Hollister thang, but
it doesn't
work when you're like a
13-year-old
chubby kid. It just doesn't work.
You're not Fitch,
let alone Abercrombie.
You're not that guy, pal.
Trust me. You're not that guy, pal. Trust me. You're not that guy.
Let's keep it going, Joel.
Let's talk about some of the outs.
I actually didn't screenshot the outs.
The outs were out for me.
Nice.
That must be what it feels like for you guys on this show.
Like hearing Joel say that
I was like why am I in this Zoom
that must be how you guys feel every time I say anything
yeah it's kind of interesting playing host
is the Headcumbe podcast
out in 2023 or
can it be out in 2024
please can we just get one more year
I mean it was a question for you conversation with
you it's in for me i really wait what's that holy shit uh i have a ton of ideas for this year so for
me it's in i mean i i i cleared up things in my schedule uh i want to do i want to do a west coast
tour if possible at the very least i want to do a show uh and then i also want to i don't want to i don't even want to talk about
my ideas for it i was i was talking to anya casey katie and marika about this last week
yes i have an idea for like a mini thing which i also don't know i'm going to cut this out because
otherwise people are going to be like you haven't done it yet I'm like I'm fucking going to
it's just what I have in mind requires a little bit
of money and I don't have a lot of it right
now and the network's not going to
give it to me
is that all we want to wax about is that all you liked about her
ins and outs because that wasn't very many, Joel.
And you said you loved it so much so that you screenshotted it.
Yeah, I really like the nightlights in the bathrooms one.
I did that.
I got one.
And it looks like a candle.
And it's light sensitive.
So it only turns on when it's dark.
And it's like a little flickering flame.
It's awesome.
I just love it too because you also have candelabras on here.
Oh, yeah.
I'm really big into Phantom of the Opera decor.
Opera core.
Opera core, yeah.
Phantom core.
Phantom of the Opera core.
Yeah.
I love that arc for you.
I'd love to see.
So this is what your room looks like now.
This is what you look like now.
We'll check in on December.
It's January 19th. We'll check in on december it's so it's january 19th
we'll check in on november 19th how about that uh i'm setting an actual reminder right now check in
with ali about phantom
of the opera core.
Part of what I'm hoping for
is that I don't know what the fuck that means
by November.
You know, make shirts for
men, I think, is Phantom of the Opera
core. I feel like a lot of them have tucked in
shirts. That's true.
Make that November 19th
check-in a pop-in.
Ooh.
Ooh. Ooh!
What's your address, Ali?
You can call me Daddy.
Ha!
Daddy!
What a good callback, Joel.
And we are at that moment where it is the 45-minute mark.
What do you guys have to plug?
What do you want to point the people to?
The floor is y'all's.
Let's go Dane, Ali, Joel.
Hit us with it.'s go Dane Alley Joel hit us with it um
Twitter Dane
Cardiel find me there
uh
I have like an announcement to make in like
a month so
yeah
stay tuned
are you leaving HeadGum no
yes okay cool uh you can follow me at Yeah, stay tuned. Are you leaving HeadGum? No. Yes.
Okay, cool.
You can follow me at AllieCon on all social media,
but really I'm getting into Letterboxd and I'm loving it,
so I don't care about anything else.
I just care about that.
Everyone, come to my party tomorrow.
Wish Simone a happy birthday wish
Anisha a happy drop
day wish me most
importantly a happy
and
that's all I got
at Jeff
on Twitter at Jeffrey James on Instagram
this
whole thing was Daz, folks.
We're back in our stride.
This is a great episode.
2023. Love. That was a Hidgum Original.