The Headgum Podcast - 235: Santa Bitch Pt. 2 (w/ Reilly Anspaugh & Miles Bonsignore!)

Episode Date: December 27, 2024

Reilly Anspaugh (Review Revue) and Miles Bonsignore (Perfect Person) join Geoff to discuss their major regrets from 2024, deliver a fresh update of “Santa Baby”, and earnestly perform their best impression of Cynthia Eviro’s modulation from the end of Defying Gravity!» FOLLOW Geoff on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/geoffreyjames/» FOLLOW Reilly on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/reillyanspaugh/» FOLLOW Miles on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/milesbon/IG: @reillyanspaugh@alfredinnitAdvertise on The Headgum Podcast via Gumball.fmRate The Headgum Podcast 5-stars on Apple PodcastsRate The Headgum Podcast 5-stars on SpotifyJoin the Headgum DiscordSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a HITGUM original. McRib is here. People throwing parties, ugly sweaters everywhere, stockings hung up by the chimney with care. It could only mean one thing. McRib is here. At Participating McDonald's for a Limited Time. With Audible, there's more to imagine when you listen. Whether you listen to stories, motivation, expert advice, any genre you love, you can be inspired to imagine new worlds, new possibilities, new ways of thinking. And Audible makes it easy to be inspired and entertained as a part of your everyday routine,

without needing to set aside extra time. As an Audible member, you choose one title a month to keep from their ever-growing catalog. Explore themes of friendship, loss, and hope with Remarkably Bright Creatures by Shelby Van Pelt. Find what piques your imagination. Sign up for a free 30-day Audible trial and your first audio book is free. Visit audible.ca to sign up.

Previously on the HeadGum Podcast. That happens. No, it doesn't. It does. Nobody ever doesn't know how to say Donahue. Oh, you'd be surprised. You'd be surprised. Nobody ever doesn't know how to say Donahue. Oh, you'd be surprised. You'd be surprised how many people don't know how to say Casey.

What do you get? Cassie. Cassie Donahue? Yes. How do you say it in like an Irish accent? Donog. I don't know the Irish accent. You're adding a G into my name there.

I get that. Also, the Q has gotten messed up. How do you feel about Casey not knowing how to pronounce your last name? You know, it would be nice if he did. I do know. But you do know. Now you do. And I think you maybe did before.

I did. I just wanted to make sure. Confirmation, yeah. Anus. Maybe did before I did. I just wanted to make sure confirmation. Yeah, Venus Right Miles you look like a dog like a dog who's sick and like trying to get it out That's right. There's like a dog being like, a dog going, it's actually really funny, but we do have to get into some serious.

Let's get serious. Start us off. Santa come me, come all over the tree for me Rudolph was an epo baby His dad was actually Prancer tonight Hahahaha! Santa bitch, try some nutritional yeast on popcorn. It'll change your whole life.

After that, I will be your dessert tonight. Boom! Santa, have you tried the clean girl aesthetic? It's just kind of wearing less and less makeup. If you can get me into aloe pilates, I'll let you come all over the tree again. Santa baby, how's it going for you? Cookies and milk. Santa wants you share something with me your pee? okay Santa Pally if you need milk I can provide milk from me the milk I mean is my cum, Santa have you tried putting sugar cookies in cum?

We'll get back to that. It's a pretty good start for Santa Bitch Part 2. Now it's a tradition, right? Three is a pattern, two is a tradition. Three is a pattern, two is a crime. I feel really self-conscious about not doing a verse about cum. Because I was thinking like, oh, Santa bitch. He's a pattern too is a crime. I feel really self-conscious about not doing a verse about cum because I was thinking like, oh, Santa bitch.

And I was trying to tie that into like, you know, what I started with Santa. Because some people have like, you know, CBD gummies, but Santa has comey gummies. Yeah. Do you think Santa takes a little CBD? Do you think he takes a CBD gummy before bed? Do you think CBD is a sham? Yeah. I think it's a sham.

I think it's a sham sham. I think it's a sham. Every time I take CBD, I'm like, I feel nothing. Every time I take THC, I said, oh, here's Johnny. Every time I do anything, I feel nothing. The moment Riley realizes she's high, she goes, here's Johnny. Here's Johnny. goes here's Johnny Johnny Now that's fun guys. Hey guys. You know what have we ever don't say now. That's funny guys No, you guys like have we like funny have we ever toast together?

You know what I mean like maybe we have it and we should maybe we should sheaf herb in a in a round Have you ever and have I have and I have because it sounds like you've never heard of it until this morning where you looked up a glossary of terms I love this stuff I love chiefing it I love dabbing it I love gas do you ever kind of oh gas what's the thing that everybody's oh the one that like Jay-Z used to call it in the 90s in rap? Hey, easy, Jay-Z referencing right now. Oh, yeah, sorry. Do you think when he got into the industry he got jazed? Here are a couple videos from Miles's re-upped YouTube. I cold plunged into Costco milk room.

Oh my god, you motherfucker. Here are a couple videos from Miles's re-upped YouTube. I cold plunged in the Costco milk room. That's right, man. It's a great video. Look, you know it, man. I went to the Costco milk room and stopping what closed. He was hiding from AJ and Big Justice. I know, I wish I would have seen them there. But if they would cold plunge in the milk room with me,

I would be honored. You heard it here first. The milk room, Costco has a room with all the milk in it that is like Just a walk in fridge. Yeah, it's a big Big cold segment on perfect person called you heard it here durst and it's basically like you have Fred durst on as you're sort of like Andy

Sidekick to your Conan style game. And you're just telling me facts that he may not know. Well, no, I think it's like Fred is like, kind of soliloquying on today's trends, or I would say tomorrow's trends, because you heard it here, Ders. So he's like, I think everyone's gonna start wearing Heelys for fashion, and then it's like,

well, you heard it here, Ders. I actually did just give the advice to someone to buy Heely's and it was because they were Really irresponsible advice excuse me. I'm talking the hell That's when you choose I'm like always your ally. I'm literally never not on your side. Please forgive me for please. No, no, no. Finally, it's not y'all two against my ass.

Now it's everyone for themselves and I might even form a coalition with Rylands. No, that won't happen. Riley, I want to say I'm sorry for that outburst. It's okay, Miles. Finish your story. When I apologize, it's never okay. You'll get me for shit that I didn't do when you wrote. Because you don't mean it. Because you don't mean it. You're like, oh, I'm sorry. And then you'll turn around and do the same shit again.

That's right. And if I had a soundboard to use in real life, I would use it to think. It's like you're silencing women. You're using it to silence women. It's like you're silencing women. It's like, what is this? Yeah. Silence women. Silencing, he's silencing women. But it's unbelievable. But the, no, what I'll say is, where were we? You're talking about Cummys?

No. It's a good ending. Let's go into our first segment that we have to do. ["The Last Post-Song"] Let's go into our first segment that we have to do Bond of the week who do you guys got Christ? It's um oh my god. That's is that the no I don't think you would be good He doesn't have it. He doesn't have it the world a commercial actor You know who I've been really into recently on a fundamental level?

Nicholas Holt. Because he was in that movie that I started watching with my lovely wife Sarah and then she got too anxious to finish it. Juror number two. Sarah is lovely. Thank you. Is she really your wife? Well, I would say she's everyone's wife in a lot of ways. Oh, I don't know about that

His wife the people's wife needle is you know, okay, so take a take a penny leave a wife Take a penny leave a wife. That's like that. It's exactly Marriages like my marriage is exactly like that. My marriage is kind of like, I don't know, take a penny. Do you feel like you have the support you need from your partner if she's the wife to everyone? I think that she not only supports me, she supports you. I don't feel support from her. I haven't seen her in like a year. If she's my wife, then we're having really serious marital problems. There's no way. Alright, requesting a screen record.

I allowed. I hear you like that. Okay, share. Starting share will stop other participants computer sound share. Yeah, I want to continue. Okay. No, I don't want to do it. This is going to be an article that I did or something.

Well, it's going to be something. Okay, so what we're working with here is three special screen recordings. Now when you find Jeffrey James's reddit account, you can actually see the times that he's... That's my favorite segment. You can see the time that he has commented. Now here's the thing. A lot of the times that Jeffrey James is comedy on Reddit, it's on r slash jkdmr, it's on r slash review review, it's on, and these are from years ago.

But, you know, he's mostly like stowing the pot, like soaking the pot, as it were, comedy style. He's making bits, he's doing jokes. But a couple times he's doing- Which is accepted. Yeah, it's just very accepted. What you're about to show is unacceptable to the audience. What I saw here is extremely unacceptable.

This was recent. This was three years ago. Sorry, I was looking at December 20, 2024, I'm like, holy shit, this was today. That would be awesome. That would be awesome. No, this is- What's Notion.so?

Notion is like an organizational thing. And I expect you, by the way, to just crop in on this and ignore sort of the rest of my secret things that I'm doing here. Media to consume. Okay, exactly right. And I have obviously, Olivia Rodrigo, All American Bitch, pulled up. So this is on r slash Dominic Fike. Somebody posted, somebody posted, Dom is finally recording and I couldn't be happier. I can't wait.

By the way, this was not a popular right to put 52 upvotes, so barely any. On a side note, I did a detour of it at the studio he's at. More than we ever got on review review. Hey. Not that many. You're an asshole. Sorry. And it's called Allaire Studios.

I believe Claro currently owns it just outside of Woodstock. Just couldn't let all my research die in my brain. So, you know, now you all know, you know, do you have to go. So somebody's just typing up and then guess who's the only comment on this post. I am Jeffrey James. This is so embarrassing for you, Jeff. Pop's, Jeffrey James, pops in and goes what was just in Woodstock last weekend? It's so sick that he's recording up there the person replies Okay, question mark God I read this and I was like This is not a performance for anyone, this is just Jeff genuinely responding already. Aw, he was excited.

Yo, fuck PM me your fave album, that's a mean response. Okay. Could have just left it. I have no memory of leaving this comment whatsoever. Okay, I'd like to see this played out. Jeff, you've been cast as I am Jeffrey James and Miles, you've been cast as PM your fave album. Oh, thank you. Will do. Yeah. So Jeffrey, take it away.

OK. And action was just in Woodstock last weekend. So sick. He's recording up there. OK. Cut that. See, I look normal in that scene. You do look, no no no. She's the asshole. Clero does not own Al Air Studios. I could have been like, um actually. Al Air Studios is not owned by Clero,

it's owned by some random producer. If no one had responded to you, you would look weird. If no one had responded to you. Actually you would even look weird, that's just a fine thing to say. But the fact someone responded to you. Actually, you wouldn't even look weird. That's just a fine thing to say. But the fact someone responded to you. OP actually saved me. Mm-hmm, yeah. Face.

OP really was just sort of sharing a fun thing, and you responded genuinely. You're sharing a fun thing too. Somebody trashed you for, yeah, you were in Woodstock. By the way, what you shared was not about Dominic Fieck, r slash Dominic Fieck. Yeah, I was just in Woodstock last weekend. I don't know why I commented this.

Miles, I know we can always count on you to unearth the... This is impressive. I feel like the last time you were on, you brought on stuff, and I was like, well, everybody already knows that. This, I didn't even know. This was a really deep dive. This is a deep cut hold on this may be kind of I can't believe I'm coming to Jeff's defense Miles that's really weird. No way you spent like so much time for this

That's We can't hear it So you guys can't hear it. Oh you guys can't hear it? Oh, sorry. No, it was playing. Okay, so all right. I need to share my computer audio again. Well, hang on.

I've got more. I've just got two more. I've just got two more. I've just got two more. So this is somebody on LA Alist. Oh my God. Middle-Ditch and Schwartz tickets. Somebody just commenting.

They said, unable to attend Middle-Ditch and Schwartz this weekend at the Largo Theater. Favorite improv in LA, selling at Purchased Value. And Jeffrey just pops in there six years ago. I'm on my way to the theater, ha ha. What's your vendor? I'll pay and then you can DM the name. Like Jeff is offering cash for

nothing on the way to the theater as well and I just thought that was interesting. I'm on my way to theater now haha. Haha. Again I, well this was at Largo. Okay yeah this was because I just wanted to go. That's awesome. I mean this is just you requesting tickets I just thought it was interesting. And finally this photo, I mean like this is just you requesting tickets. I just thought it was interesting. And finally, this photo. I mean, like, this is like pretty damning. Can you show the, can you show the, yeah, the headline? You pull up five of the five most hated comedians in America.

Yes. Oh my God. So these are three out of five of them, huh? This is an unbelievable photo. So two out of five. I mean, I see this photo and I'm like, it looks Photoshopped, but it's not. It's crazy that it's not.

You look so uncomfortable, Jeffrey. Yeah, what are you? Because we were losing. It was a game? Yes, the game. Was this, I don't know if this was the Eastern Conference finals Yeah, this is the conference finals and we were losing the game And this would have been 2017. That's a really incredible

Shot. It's so funny. Why are you very funny? Why are you sitting next to Amy Schumer and Dave Chappelle? Well, you know David had this kind of writers workshop that uh, you know, David had this kind of writers workshop that, you know, a couple of us were invited to and no fucking way. You know, we were kind of like ping ponging back and forth. You know, and that's this was actually the weekend I came up with. So that was actually me and Amy were sort of kicking something around. And then do the next segment because he's just going to do this. That's right. No, I don't know why they were not. And then, Dave was like, oh, I have tickets. Because he's just going to do this. That's right. No, I don't know why they were there.

I was there because I am from Cleveland. That makes sense. I was home for the holidays. No, I wasn't home for the holidays. I was home for, in May. He's floundering. He's fucking. He doesn't know what to say.

He doesn't know what to say. All right, well. He has a beach background and he's floundering like a fish on the beach. This guy learned how to swim when he was young and he's fucking a fish about it. He's a fish. He's a fish. He's a fish. Gillsmuch? Sorry, you're trying to get my ass and what you've landed on is that I'm a fish. Gillsmuch?

Gillsmuch? Gillsmuch is supposed to make me feel self-conscious about what my neck is much Can't actually do kind of have fucker hills. This is like Did you get cupping done you totally did cupping Foul I've never had it done, but it really looks not we know you've never had it done We know you've never had it done because every time you show not. We know you've never had it done. We know you've never had it done, because every time you show up, you're stressed

and you bring this energy, right? Why don't we all let's all, she logged off. Now it's going to make it so much harder for Grace to edit. You bullied her and she logged off. You guys called me a gil. You guys called me a fish. What if we all. Guys, let's do some.

I think the three of us, sorry, is there more? Or can I start, can you stop sharing? No, I can stop go. I think the three of us. Sorry. Is there more or can I start? Can you stop sharing? No, I can stop sharing has sex stop the share I don't know what that is. But if you're lying to share a line, here's my question What if we all you're lying to share if you're in line to share stay in line stay in line If you're in line to share share about to play That's right. Oh, by the way, a wallow water bottle in Riley's background. Shout out. I Have one too and my wife has that I just got it. Oh, it's so good. It's so good

It's just like a nasty little water bottle Did you guys just say you just say delectation Delactation. When you stop lactating? When you remove lactate lactose from something. It's a formal word for a feeling of enjoy. It's a formal word for a feeling of enjoy. Delactation.

Is that what you're feeling right now? And by the way, you haven't once, can I get in there and say something first for just one fucking second? You've spoken a lot. You actually haven't once said welcome to the Headgun Podcast. Also, my Bond of the Week is Michael Caine and Muppet Christmas Carol, so if you either care to fucking hear any of our answers,

Jeffrey. You guys, I open the door, you walk through or you don't. I'm not gonna hold the door open for you. No, you give us ten seconds and then if you don't like what we're saying, you blast every cue on the soundboard. Um, sorry, your bottom of the week is Scrooge or whatever. What is it? Is Michael Caine as Scrooge in Muppet Christmas Carol? Did you guys see Spirited? What is that?

I, I, Riley, you would love it. Yeah. Musical theater. Why wouldn't I love it? I'm sorry, but why wouldn't I love it? You don't like Joy. I don't like Joy. You're saying I don't like Joy. The whole ethos of this shit is be Joy.

No, but you, that's like what you aspire to because you've never, you've never have been it. You've never have been it you've never been joy You're you're yeah. Oh, we done so angry, but I'm the one who's not being joy You just yelled at me you're like be joy. That's not joy. It's a musical theater extravaganza with Hugh Jackman excuse me he's not in it Ryan Reynolds will feral and also That sounds like what the hell you're gonna support team up Excuse me. He's not in it Ryan Reynolds will feral and also people That sounds like what the you're gonna support team up look at what they're advertising for me. Oh shit

I've never even Shit I can't decide which one's hotter of all I think these two hair together might be my New Year's fit. Yeah That's that's horn. Did you take on I think these two paired together might be my New Year's fit, yeah. That's horny. Would you take on a new name, like a fursona? Santa horny. Wait. My fursona would be I'm a beaver. Who likes beaver?

Santa horny, dress me as a beaver for the party. Butt plug with the tail ends, coming out of my dockers in front of my dad. Santa won't you dress me in fur. Put me in a collar, walk me round like a dog. Walk me round like a dog. Next year, I will be a puppy for you. And then you can give Jeff your hog. My hog is a... Santa baby, how to single a tree.

Snowman, Santa, Brosley snowman, Santa honey. I really didn't think he was gonna make it to the microphone. make me too like the microphone. The make me tonight. Um, that was really good. Miles, do you have a bond of the week or can we move on? I actually do. Um. I have to butter it up for a second. Miles, you with like short cropped hair and a backwards hat, you are a different person and I really

don't know how to feel. You know, this is a different... Maybe. Maybe. What's up guys? Ideally no, but maybe. Yeah, like literally it's like... My name is Dan.

No, it's Dan's streamer who I feel unsafe with. We really gotta, but maybe. Yeah, like literally, it's like. My name's Dan. No, it's two streamers I feel unsafe with. Hey, what's up, you looking up on your church? When we come back for the break, this won't be happening. Holy shit, there's an ad. Guys, we are calling upon you, our audience, because we are conducting an audience survey

at gum.fm slash. What's that? And we want to hear from you guys so that we can keep creating this content that you love. You know, this, we know this for a podcast to run. There have to be ads on it. Right. And we want to improve that advertising experience for you so that it's more tailored to our general audience. But in order to do that, we need to know a little bit more about you guys, our audience. Now the survey is quick, easy and free and it's a great way to support me and this podcast.

You may have noticed there haven't been a lot of ads on the show the past couple of months and at a certain point you know you don't know if that's going to jeopardize the show we just don't know. So it'll only take you two minutes or less and you'll be really helping me out and the show by filling it out, by filling out the survey so that we can know what things you guys maybe need or want, what categories of advertising might fit you guys best as a whole and then we can tailor the advertising endeavors to your guys' needs. So go to gum.fm slash what's that to fill out our audience survey.

Again that's gum, g-u-m dot fm slash. What's that? Thanks guys. Holy shit There's an ad guys. We are calling upon you our audience because we are conducting an audience survey at gum FM slash what's that and we want to hear from you guys so that we can keep creating this content that you love You know this we know this for a podcast to, there have to be ads on it, right? And we wanna improve that advertising experience for you so that it's more tailored to our general audience. But in order to do that, we need to know a little bit more about you guys,

our audience. Now the survey is quick, easy, and free, and it's a great way to support me and this podcast. You may have noticed there haven't been a lot of ads on the show the past couple of months. And at a certain point, you know, you don't know if that's going to jeopardize the show. We just don't know. So it'll only take you two minutes or less and you'll be really helping me out and the show by filling it out, by filling out the survey so that we can know what things you guys maybe need or want, what

categories of advertising might fit you guys best as a whole and then we can tailor the advertising endeavors to your guys's needs. So go to gum.fm slash what's that to fill out our audience survey again that's gum.fm slash what's that? Thanks guys! And we're back welcome back to the HeadG podcast you happy now who's your bond who's your bond guys wait? Okay, here it is here. I know in the past I've said Sadie. See sorry. You're so messy with the way you speak You slur when you're sober He was just flossing in the background. Give him a second to breathe. Sorry, I can't catch my breath.

That was a minute ago. You know what I will say? You know what I will say? I think that I've learned the wrong lesson by being a podcaster because I'll mess my words up and just be encouraged to keep talking. And I think that I've done that for years at this point. My bond of the week, I said Nicholas Holt was a fine B minus bond. But my number one pick, Eddie Remaine. He's so- Eddie Redmayne? Eddie Redmayne.

Or is it a different guy named Eddie Remaine? Eddie with red hair, Maine. Eddie Redmayne. Because he's in that new show where he's a little fucking assassin and he's so creepy and hot at it. The Jackal something. The Jackal.

And I think he would be good as a weird little Bond, but he'd have to gain like 14 pounds of muscle. All right. Are you guys familiar with Grace's Purloins, Casey's Dimes, that sort of segment? No. Do you think I... No, I'm excited about it. You guys both lambasted me before we started recording because I don't watch every YouTube video that Myles puts out.

When I do watch something, I brought up one segment we do every week, and then Myles started and stopped a sentence that would have been, sorry, do you think I listen to this bullshit? You think I listen to this segment? You think I listen to this show? Let me listen to something. Because I actually do sometimes listen to this show. Let you listen to something. Let me listen to something because I actually do something so I can

know what we're doing so I do sometimes listen to the show and okay you know what can I you know what I'll say he's looking at the segment right now he's like let me share my screen you may not be screen let me share way to look at it. There's no way to see it without listening to it. Let me share my screen. You may not share your screen. Let me share my screen. Look at this. I've listened to some. Why did you need to share your screen to? You can see that it's of the red. It's the little red.

This is an indictment on the show that you start listening to it and you stop. I've listened to a little bit of stuff. The longest you listened to was the episode I wasn't on because I had COVID. Like I listened to just a little bit of that. Okay, did you listen to is the episode I wasn't on because I had COVID like I listened to just a little bit of that. Listen to like a hat. But you know what I'll say? You know what I'll say? I did actually recently I was rewatching. Maybe you're gonna come off in the way that I don't want to

hear it. You were rewatching an episode you were on a compilation of episodes. And it made me excited because it was a lot of the Christmas one from last year. Santa's Palace. Make me a compilation video of me cranking my own shaft. Let me watch me have a orgasm in my room. Santa cum me.

Santa bitch. Put a mirror up in my room. Let me watch myself fuck myself. I'm Miles and I watch compilations of myself to get myself off. Santa please watch me dream? My room on a Christmas dream Santa's naughty list is sticking two together It's stuck, it's covered in Santa's come

Let me finish while I look myself in the eyes Ho Ho Ho! finish while I look myself in the eyes. Oh, oh, oh. That's it. That's it. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. So, you haven't heard this segment, so that might make it a little bit more interesting. Guys, we've been doing this quantitative segment, not qualitative segment.

We've done Casey's Dimes. We've done Grace's Purloins. We've done Casey's dimes. We've done Grace's purloins. We've done Joel's flaws. This is Riley's oopsies. Basically, and I don't want to know what they are. I don't want to know what they are. It's not. I just want to know.

Alliterative and it's not rhyming. It's it's how many oopsies has Riley done? Oh, I'm interested. Or like. Do you still wear a diapy? It's it's how many oopsies has Riley done. Oh Or like you still wear a diapy I Was gonna ask are you all typed up? Let's just do the segment. Sorry American sniper. I thought what I said, this is Californian diaper and it's about Riley's undergarments, which is when you have a navigation system in between your cheeks. Undergarments. Undergarments under my grunts. That was good. OK, what are my oopsies? How many oops? No, no, no, no.

Not you're already misunderstanding. I said it was qualitative, not quantitative. Sorry, quantitative, not qualitative. I don't care what the oopsies were. How many oopsies have you had? In what span of time? Ever? Just answer that. Not qualitative. I don't care what the oopsies were. It's how many oopsies have you had? In what span of time? Ever?

Can you just answer that? You clearly never heard the segment. 14. There you go. All right, moving on. Well, you didn't say if I was right or not. I don't know. You just say it.

It doesn't matter. Guys, I've been trying to write- Hey, Jeff. Wait, sorry. Sorry sorry me and Riley are being very patient and vulnerable by showing a reached your limit on talking shut the fuck up hey Jeff sound men no he's not it was too far he's gonna hit it again. That was too far. He's gonna hit it again. That was actually too far.

I'm a guest. And me and Riley are showing our backgrounds, I mean, quite vulnerable, just for a moment, if you would just cut the facade and show your background. Cut the shit even. Wow, look at that. Wow. I saw the light in his eyes go. Why would you die?

Like I feel like he's like, oh shit, now I'm here with them. Yeah, he wants to act like. You know, this is the perfect segue, actually. I've been trying to write a novel, right? And that's also been something that we've been doing the wax portion of the show. Well, I haven't started putting pen to page yet, but I want to, I just need to come up with the perfect title first. You hand write a novel? Just so it doesn't crash, yeah. Can you please, can you please? That's part of why I haven't started is that I'm so worried that I'm gonna get 80 pages

into the bitch and then I'm gonna like. For Santa Bitch 3, can you have as much handwritten of a novel as you can by next year? Yes, but not handwritten because nobody's going to be able to read it. You read it. I'm not going to be able to read it. My handwriting is so bad. Yeah.

I'm in an Airbnb in Wichita, Kansas, so I can't, I don't know where to get a pen and pad, but why? He's on the run. Why? Don't just say why. Be interested in why I'm here. That's what he did. Really?

I was asking questions about your life because I'm interested in what you do. He only hears tone, he doesn't hear the word. No, he doesn't. Why? I'm gonna write the book. I just need the perfect title first. That's what we've been trying to figure out since like mid September.

Oh, here's my pitch. Becoming and this is why it's a perfect timing that I bring up this title because of what's been happening for the past couple minutes. The name of the title is Becoming Unwelcome. All right. It's a coming of age tale about a teenage boy who's always been a wallflower becoming even more uninvited to shit. Is there growth?

Would that add to it? Or is it just kind of a series of unfortunate events of... I was gonna say it's sort of like, the elevator pitch is that it's a series of unfortunate events meets me. Is it perks of becoming unwelcome? Like it's sort of a perks of the wallflower. Like there's some little kid that freaking does it.

The cons of being a wallflower. Yeah, I was going to say the cons of being a wallflower. Honestly, the cons of being a wallflower. It's such a funny book. And it's just all bad. Oh, that's so good, though. That's really good. Well done. It's like I'm shy and, that's so good though. That's really good. Well done, I feel proud of you.

It's like I'm shy and I've never gotten anything for that. No one's asking me to dance or to a party because I'm shying. Yeah, it starts as a novel and it ends as a manifesto. Guys, what is your major? Well, let's, here we go. Santa honey Your tears in a jar a new honey

by a platinum mine cuz you are Independently wealthy from stocks and bonds stocks and bonds stocks and bonds stocks and bonds stocks and bonds Santa baby. My God, Miles. Sorry. Guys, what are your major regrets from 2024? Let's get into it. Let's make it some of your deepest, darkest shit. Let's start with at least eight. Investing in United Health Care.

investing in UnitedHealthcare. Um... S- Santa me No, my real, if I'm really being vulnerable and wrong. Do you want a real one or do you want a vulnerable, sorry, do you want a vulnerable or do you want a joke one, Jeff? Because Miles and I, we can go there. You can't go there. Let's do, let's do real and then then joke real and then joke for all of us

That's you know, I only and I we're both classically trained. We can I'm gonna be raw and vulnerable right here. Hang on. Let me just get in the way you are Get the character nobody says let me get into character to be raw and vulnerable. Let me get into character to be raw and vulnerable. And... Wish I... I'd less sugary snot. Not that big of a deal, right? I was. You're going to start. Not that big of a deal, right?

You're in shape and you're in good health. Hey, what's that? You say, say more, you're fishing for. No. No. You say, came more. You wish you came more. I did. I did.

Ha ha ha ha ha! I did. Now I'll do a joke one, I'm gonna do a joke one. Your regret is that. Let me do a joke one. What's that? Let me do a joke one. That was is that... Let me do a joke one. That was the real one, is that you wish that you masturbated more. You're a father.

I wish I...let me do a joke one. It doesn't necessarily mean masturbating. I wish I, um... had more time to be healthy. Alright, that was the joke one. That one seemed real. And then let's get another joke one, I guess. A porn sound. It's the Riz.

No, guys, taking care of your health isn't always easy, but it should at least be simple, right? And that's why for the last three and a half years I've been drinking AG1 every day, no questions asked. It's just one scoop in a mixed in water, once a day, every day, and it makes me feel energized and it provides mental clarity that I have so been craving the past year. And that's because each serving of AG1 delivers my daily dose of vitamins, minerals, pre and probiotics, and more. It's a powerful healthy habit that's also powerfully simple to maintain. So, guys, how do you know for sure that AG1 is a quality product? Well, I know with AG1 that my body is getting easily absorbable nutrition, vitamins, and minerals because every batch of AG1 goes through a rigorous testing process so you know it's safe.

And their ingredients are sourced for absorption, potency, and nutrient density, which a lot of these supplements guys are not. But AG1 specifically formulated is. So if there's one product I had to recommend to elevate your health, it's AG1. And that's why we've partnered with them for so long. So if you want to take ownership over your health, start with AG1. Try AG1 and get a free one-year supply of Vitamin D3 plus K2, which I have to take a lot because I'm deficient in it, and five free AG1 travel packs with your first purchase exclusively at drinkag1.com.

Slash, what's that? Again, that's drinkag1.com. Slash, what's that? Check it out. 2025 was a good year, you know, I think I- Wrong year, 2024. Oh, sorry. 2024 was- No, this is the joke one, that's silly. Cause it's not the year. Oh, it's gonna be funny. You know what I'll say?

It was a good year. I was a busy beaver. I wish I had made more time for friends. To be honest. That was easy. All right, Riley? uh friends to be honest that was easy all right riley um i wish i had seen wicked more times yeah i'm defying gravity take me high so that's my joke that's my joke i wish i'd joke. I wish I'd seen it more. My real one is that I wish

Oh, sorry. Do you not give a shit? Oh, oh, my real ones. I wish I've gave gave a shit about me. My real resolution about your Oh, your regret. Sorry. My regret. I wish Jeff had given more of a shit about me. My joke is that, no, sorry, my real one is, I wish I'd put more time into the review review marketing because the show is now done. Joke one. I wish. Um, joke one. I wish.

I wish I wasn't so annoyed by how people train dogs with weird voices. I got it. We got a dog and sometimes it's tough, like in watching videos or trainers and it's like you want to get their attention by you know talking to them and like And that's really tough and I really I wish that didn't trigger me and make me so angry That's really funny. I just want to talk to me like hey Josie sit. Hey Josie. Come here, but it says And I'm like that's nothing to me. Wait, they're doing the voice for your dog. You're not doing the voice. Yes, I'm not doing the voice.

You don't like doing a doggie voice. I would say I got sometimes- No, I like doing a doggie voice, but not like, Bye, yada yada. Bye, yada yada. But you know, it's like, that's not, well, me. What I like to do is talk to my dog. Like she's a little baby girl.

Oh yeah, I do that with my dog too. I'm sort of like, you know, okay, sit. Yeah. But I'm not going, oh my god. Yeah, exactly. That's not for me. There's a line. Big regret, I wish I had sang more this year.

That is a, that is a, Here's your chance. pattern thing that I... Here's your chance. ...I... Hmm. Ha ha! Santa baby, throw coat all down my ma. By ma I mean in my throat.

Santa baby, eat, row in a coat. Use tree sap as lubricant so that I feel like a Christmas tree. Dangle your compliments all over me but tease me and don't give them until I finish. Santa creamy, take around me on the tree, a gift. I want a gift under the tree. Santa please love me. Miles, your relationship with Santa needs to be studied. You want him to come all over your gifts?

He's your dad. You want him to watch you come? Miles loves. And you also want him to love you. I do. He's your daddy. I have two questions. The first of which, I've got two questions. the first of which sound like I was about to do

a bar an M&M style The thing I actually like it's all to do because Riley was wishing that we had sang more this year As a quartet. And I'm wondering, do we each want to go around and... Wait, sorry, who's the fourth one? God? God. Always, always, JC. Be God, JC. Santa also.

Is Santa God? Yeah, by the way, the Father, the Son, the Holy Ghost, and Santa Claus. But I'm wondering... The Father, the Son, and the Santa Claus. And the Santa Claus. I'm like, Father, son, and a Santa Claus. And a Santa Claus. What was that? Well, I'm wondering if we each want to go around and do the Defying Gravity modulated... Oh, that's really good.

The modulated ending of the song, Cynthia Erivo style, as genuine as possible. I think that would be really, really nice. I think that would be awesome. Hang on. Let me see if I can get a karaoke thing of this shit. Now, if we can be reminded... Do you want this acapella? It's acapella.

I'm not going to be able to find it, so this is bullshit. It's acapella. I'm not gonna find it so this is it's acapella and it's not men cells. It's not It's that Right so let's all right and well My guess is that Riley's is gonna be fantastic And I think that probably, my guess is that Riley's is gonna be fantastic in Justin's. No, mine is gonna, here's the thing, mine's, I know what it is, like the, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah because you have to know it and then you have to do it. Miles and I don't know it. Barely. And we can't do it. So I'll go first. Do you want me to go first?

Yeah, you set the tone, set the tempo of the conversation. You have to go first because then it's embarrassing to me and Miles. Exactly right. If you go last, it's just like, it works. I'm gonna be embarrassed. Okay. This is so funny.

Are we supposed to do it earnestly? You're talking about us doing it for real. Like you have defied gravity, you are now queen, you've escaped from Oz, whatever. I'm so happy. I'm in my boyfriend's family's basement and his parents are musicians, so they have like a soundproof basement.

I've never been happier to be in a soundproof place in my life. Wait, sorry. They're going to be upstairs kind of vatering. We have to add a caveat. You have to go open the door. No, absolutely not. You have to open the door. No, absolutely not. You have to open the door.

Otherwise, you're not going to do it. Otherwise, this doesn't count. Otherwise, it doesn't count. No, it does count. I'm not doing it. Do it for the listeners. Go ahead and open that door. Go ahead and open that door. Go ahead and open that door.

I'm not opening it. You're going to open the door. You're going to bring your bike over to the open door frame and you're going to do it out to the door. open that door. Go ahead and open that door. I'm not opening the door. You're gonna open the door. You're gonna bring your mic over to the open door frame and you're gonna do it out to the door. Open the door. No. And nobody in all of Osno is ever gonna be there.

Oh yeah. Oh god, this is so silly. You just have to do the, oh, yeah, okay. Oh. That was insane! It was so fun! Wait, that was actually so good. That was, I'm so embarrassed.

That was so good. All right, guys, we do have to wrap it up. Let's get a couple of, no, I'm kidding. I'm kidding. No! No! Oh no! My hands are sweaty.

All right, here we go. No, that was a joke, that was a joke. All right, I'm gonna do it second. I'll. All right, here we go. No, that was a joke, that was a joke. All right, I'm gonna do it second. I'll do it second, here we go. Ernest Miles. And nobody is all of us, and everybody living for us is ever gonna bring me down.

Bring me down. Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!

Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!

Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Boys miles Jeff you go this is round one This sucks cuz I know okay

In the original octave yes Yes, okay, sorry can you give me the the starting note Riley could just cuz you've already gone Well, that's an octave lower that you for your octave yeah Sorry my Well, that's an octave lower. Yeah, for your octave, yeah. Sorry, my recording just stopped. No way. Oh, perfect timing. Perfect timing, Jeff. Perfect timing, Jeff.

Just stop. Yeah. No, this makes it worse because now I'm stuck in the anxiety of it. Stuck in the anxiety. I'm seeing it again tonight with my partner's family and I can't wait. It's so exciting. I've only seen it the once, but I've been listening to the sound. I gotta go back for the number two. Wow, it's so good.

It's just so good. Musical theater's back, baby. Dancing through life. Dancing through life. He's so awesome, dude. All of the cast is good. He's so fucking hot. They're great. All right, here we go.

Jonathan Bailey, I need him to fuck me, but he won't cuz he's gay what? Alright here we go put that on the soundboard That's great keep it in Grace keep that in Okay, here's my second one here we go Actually, that's a great soundboard. That was good. OK, here's my second one. Here we go.

No, that wasn't serious. I do feel like, actually, you tried to slide it in, Jeff. No, you have to. No. That was it. Like, you are Cynthia Rivo. Give me the starting note again. Give me the starting note again.

Ah. It has to be falsetto, so it's not going to sound good. If I drop the octave, it might sound good. No, Miles didn't do. Then try dropping the octave. Next one, you have to jump up. OK. Oh, this sucks. Now I don't want to drop the octave, and the next one you have to jump up. Okay. Oh, this sucks.

Now I don't wanna drop the octave. Wait. No, that's not it. This is the worst thing I've ever been a part of. That's it? You gotta go full voice, Jeff. Come on, sing, sing, Jeff, for the monkey. Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, 1, go! He was trying! That was fucked up! Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaiaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa You had a bad day. You had a bad day. Jeff, let him do it, you fucker.

Let me sing, Jeff. That was so mean. That was actually, Jeff, a hate crime against musical theater. It was a musical theater hate crime. Do it. Go, Miles. Three, two, one, go. Oh! Cause you had a bad day. You had a bad day.

You had a bad day. Cause you had a bad day. I'm sorry. That was easy. That was easy. I'm out and you really don't mind. You had a bad day. You had a bad day. Me and Bach. All right, guys, we have more to get to. I I was like, holy shit, I should have brought more segments, but we haven't even gotten to like the outline of my wax portion.

And it's been 50 minutes. So here we go to be a segment. Now is having people do earnestly It doesn't just have to be defined gravity, but like earnest a hard part of a song Yeah, okay guys, uh The New York Times had an article today I'm gonna skip some stuff because it was it wasn't as funny as that The New York Times had an article today. I am going to skip some stuff because it wasn't as funny as that. The New York Times had an article here today called when a... Actually, can I get Miles to... The energy is halted.

Here we go. Can you read this headline, Miles? When barn dominium won't do, try a shower. This is upsetting. Homeowners and builders, yeah, this really feels like you wrote it. Homeowners and builders weighed in on the difference between the two design styles taking over rural America.

When barn dominium won't do. This is sucks. It's like, Jesus. Try a shout. When a barn dominium won't do, try a schaus. Try a schaus. Tag yourself, are you more of a barn dominium or more of a schaus?

A schaus must be shed house? Shed house. I think it's either shack house or shed house. I'm a barn dominium type gal, I think. Oh, interesting, I would say I'm a schaus. But I would classify this as shed house, not shack house. Well, my understanding is... What exactly makes a schaus distinct from a barn doe?

I think a schaus has less insulation because the animals have barn insulation, maybe. That's cool. I think I'm a schaus. You think so? Barn dominium just feels more... I think I want to settle down in a schaus, but I wanna live in a Barn Dominium, like in the city, like where I'm like, you know, pre-kid, like I'm having fun.

Okay, so this is a Barn Dominium, this is a Barn Doe, or sorry, this is a Shouse, what the fuck? This is a Barn Doe. That's a Shouse. This is a Shouse. That's a Barn Doe. There don't have any photos of Barn Does. Who the hell are these guys? Okay. Wow, I hate this so much. Okay, Shouse on the left and Shouse on the right.

What do you mean you hate this so much? You don't like the aesthetic? No, I hate the aesthetic and I hate the vibe. And I think that it sort of is like, why? Just why is the question. Tall ceilings, you know, I just hate the vibe of it. It's also like these cars and your shouse running with the doors closed.

You see, it's like a carbon monoxide problem for sure. I mean, if I'm living in a barn though, it might be my best bet in terms of future prospects. Yeah, if I live in a schaus, kill me. OK. OK. What's your next thing, Jeff? You're an asshole. Whoa, Riley. Uh oh.

Sorry. What's that? Kitty got claw. What about this for Kitty's Got White Claws? I'll go, I'll hit it. Here we go. Yeah! Mrs. Claws found all my dills in the shower.

Uh oh. I'm worried she's gonna tell Santa Claus, and then I won't get gifties tonight. Prostate play is a sin on the naughty list. If you spread your cheeks, you will get a pile of coal in your sack. Santa, touch my ass. You'll be well going on the way to class. Why are you bummed out about it now? It's Santa bitch because I know it's like. I just feel like it's like you always find something to be bummed out about,

right, because now you're like, Santa, what the Santa what? Because it doesn't bother you when we're doing it before us. It doesn't matter. Do you think you're an evil piglet, a owl or a rabbit? I think I'm a rabbit because I'm anxious as shit. Oh yeah because I'm wise as hell. I actually think I'm a poo from The Simpsons. Guys what do you have going on? What do you want to point the people towards? Let's start with miles Guys listen the perfect person podcast if you're interested if you like this you can start with Jeff and Riley's episodes

They're both on and they're both really funny, and I think we have a wacky fun vibe when we get together Crazy Riley both really funny and I think we have a wacky fun vibe when we get together. We're crazy. Riley? Well, my show ended a review review. So listen to the backlog if you miss it. But new show coming out in 2025 TBD date, but it's going to be a fun time. In the meantime, watch headgum sketches. Follow me on Instagram at Riley Nanska. Listen to me on perfect person in watch headgum sketches. Follow me on Instagram at Riley Nansky. Listen to me on Perfect Person and the Headgum podcast.

And I don't know, watch the films I've made. All my shit's on my Instagram. Any details about the new show or is it under wraps? It's going to be me and Alfred Bardwell Evans. And it's going to be Cunty. Whoa. I feel safe to say that it'll be friendly for advertisers in the, what was it, beauty and cosmetics space? Nope, women's lifestyle space.

So yeah, Cunty. Okay, cause like, yeah. I have nothing to plug. I guess I'll plug Miles's YouTube because we talked about that earlier. Let's play us out. Santa Cunty, you're serving mother cunt all day. Cunt. Santa, you're such a cunt. Not in the way that British people say it, but Americans are like, Santa, you're such a cunt.

Not in the way that British people say it, but Americans are like, oh, you're such a cunt, you bitch. You're such a cunt. Santa, baby, your boots the house down. Santa, please, can we have? Can we have? Come.

It ends on Santa, can we please have? And this, by the way, coming out after Christmas. ["The Christmas Tree"] Hey, hey, I'm Lamorne Morris. And I'm Kyle Shevrin. And we're here interrupting your workout to tell you about the La Morning After podcast, now on HeadGum. That's right. Every Wednesday, a new episode drops, and we... Wait, LeMond, what are you doing over there?

It's nothing, just polishing my Emmy. Why? Because we're now the only official HeadGum podcast hosted by an Emmy winner. Is that true? Probably not. But Jake Johnson's on HeadGum. Does he have an Emmy?

No, but he has been a guest on The Morning After. Which might be an even bigger honor. I mean, and we have other amazing guests like Glenn Powell, Raven Simone, the cast of New Girl, and many, many more. Plus, we play games, we tell stories, we poll the fans. For questions. We poll them for questions, nasty. Just polling them constantly. Up and down, sideways, backwards. It's a lot less weird than it sounds. You'll see. Subscribe to The Morning After on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Pocket Casts, or wherever you get your podcasts. And watch video episodes on YouTube. New episodes drop every Wednesday.