The Joe Budden Podcast - "The JBP x Kevin Samuels"
Episode Date: April 16, 2021Joe Budden sits down with Kevin Samuels. Tune in to an episode you don't want to miss! Â To watch this episode and for more exclusive content: become a Patron of the The Joe Budden Podcast at www.pat...reon.com/JoeBudden
Transcript
Discussion (0)
All right. All right. Mike, Mike, Mike, Mike, Mike, Mike. All right. Now, what is my panda
bear name?
Excuse me?
Who? Caesar?
No, I said, excuse me. I don't know what the fuck a panda bear name is.
I thought you said Caesar.
Okay. We have a guest today and it says I'm going to be, I'm going to pander. It says
I'm going to pander.
To women. I see the word play. He's going to pander. It says I'm going to pander. I see the word play.
Maybe I will.
Maybe I will. No, you are.
He is. No doubt about it.
He's going to pander to the women.
He knows that I'm going to support 85%,
90%. It's not
misogyny parts.
It's accuracy. I don't think it's misogyny.
I think it's accuracy.
He knows that I'm going to support 95% of it.
We'll see.
So he's going to take the female stance and start tiptoeing and pandering to the female
audience.
So we got to find a name for Kung Fu Panda over here.
That's going to go into his pro-woman bag.
And I don't think it's anti-woman, my stances.
They're not, actually.
Well, when you start defending something that no one has brought to the table,
kind of setting the bar there a little bit.
We've had this conversation a bunch.
Yeah, but now the public doesn't know about anything we've had,
and I might lie.
You're our customer to do.
I might lie, so don't just assume things.
Just might.
Might.
I might lie.
That's fine.
How are my cameras?
How's my shot?
Is the green popping off the film, the lens?
It's an olive.
It's an olive.
It's not olive, but okay.
Is it popping off the, ooh, yeah, yeah.
You good?
You good?
Yeah, it's him.
It's him.
It's him.
It's him.
He is not them.
I would hope not. How y'all doing, man?
I'm good, man.
Just stop trying to rap, though.
Why?
You want to fill those bars?
No, bro.
Let it go.
You're done.
It's in his blood.
No, it's not.
You're done.
He doesn't want to hear you rap anymore like Fab.
You don't want to hear nobody we love rap.
I would love to hear Fab rap if he rapped like the Fab I love.
I just know what would happen
in the event
that a Joe track
mysteriously,
a new,
fresh Joe track
just dropped from the sky
and killed you
with a guitar solo on it.
And you already know
what would happen.
I really don't.
And I ain't trying to be funny.
Wow.
I'm not trying to be funny.
I don't.
What if he does it over a track beat? I don't think you be funny wow I'm not trying to be fun I don't what if he what if he does I don't think you could be you could be real rusty you're
not you're not you're not you know you ain't ball in a minute you can't run out
there on the court and just okay I'm not I'm not saying that I'm saying poetry is
poetry so if you're a poet once you can yeah but yeah you rusty you be rusty here here you are i
don't know if you need the pillow or not no all right no do we need i don't need a pillow either
i don't need a pillow you want a pillow fight can somebody take that yeah get adjust yourself
i'm gonna intro this somehow all right hold up man i mean you go back and punch in the intro or
no i'm not going back and punching nothing man
We hear this is in real time
This is live mic check mic check mic check one two one two
Mic check one two one two caught all look good
Alright, you good good. You good ice is good. I thought the music was appropriate. Yeah, I mean, I'm just setting a vibe
I have a candle we have them here
We have a very special guest Abe we work on an off day Abe hold up man I got to hear some air horns
yeah I got to get things right man pretty good at that
you people are beautiful man you guys look man. You guys look great tonight. You guys look great this evening.
What?
Good at what?
Podding?
Talking?
No.
Nah, you just good at it.
Getting the energy.
Yeah, yeah.
Because I was sleeping.
I was sleeping.
Listen.
I used to work at the morning show.
You did.
I forgot.
I used to work at the morning show in 2000 and whatever year that
was 2003 as a rapper they were asking me to hold down the morning drive 6 a.m to 10 a.m at that
time i had no idea the importance of the morning drive at a radio station so there was some
fundamental things i had to learn and a part of that was tonality the on off switch but as a rapper
you kind of have to have to have that on stage.
Now, did someone kind of walk you through how to project and talk?
Or did you figure it out by doing it?
Ebro was a big help to me.
Okay.
Ebro was a big help to me.
Tracy was a big help to me.
And then, yeah, and the radio.
On the radio, they were a big help.
Gotcha.
Yeah.
Like the listeners, you mean?
Like feedback?
What do you mean?
No, just other people that were professional broadcasters.
I went to podcasters, and he's like, yo, talking to the mic.
Okay.
He said on the radio.
They had to teach me what a commercial break was on the radio,
how long the talk time was on the radio,
how to orchestrate on the radio.
They were asking me to be a mic so
i had to learn those things but it's not about me right now hold up hold up hold up hold up hold up
no no no no yeah there we go
all right kev we're happy to have you here, man Likewise, man I'm good
I'm gonna tell the people
Let me tell the people how this came to be
Because this is amazing
I'll just let her get two bars off
And we'll get right into it
I gave you all the love I got
I gave you more than I could
Let me start harmonizing Please don't do that I gave you more than I could give I gave you more than I could give I gave you more than I could give
I gave you all that I have inside
And you took my life
And you took my life
And you took my life
And you took my life
And you took my life
And you took my life
And you took my life And you took my life Oh, y'all know the words out there. Of course. Uh.
Microphone check.
One, two.
What is this?
We are here on an off day.
Let me tell the people how this came to be.
All right.
I DM'd you.
And I felt odd. Because as a man man you don't really dm men right right we don't dm men honestly nah but if it's a purpose year oh i don't still don't dm men
but we got it off and i say yo man love what you doing. Keep it up. And we had that exchange.
And then randomly out of the blue, I said, yo, I'd love to have you.
And you just happened to be in the city, in New York City.
That's right, right, right.
And yeah, we DM for business.
I'm good with DMs for business.
Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
Yeah, you good.
Yeah, I mean, this is about the third or fourth time I've been to Manhattan in the last six months.
And probably back in a couple of three weeks.
But I wanted to make sure I got a chance to get by here because I'm about to do a lot more collaborations.
I'd already done with No Jumper about a couple of months ago.
And the thing is, I want to get out and talk to as many people who are not used to what I say.
Because many people are getting introduced to me uh off of clips and they really and you really can't kind
of gauge anything off a clip other than what they want you to gauge so I'm like well if you if you're
gonna say something like I say even on my show you need to take it to as many people friendly or not
and be able to have a conversation.
And if nothing else,
you get credit
for at least showing up
and having a convo.
Well,
I have to be honest with you.
I've spoken to a few people
to let them know
that I was doing this interview.
Some of them were women.
Yeah.
And boy,
were they angry about it.
Oh, yeah?
Oh, they killed me. They kicked ass so i love you i love everybody but how do you feel do you know that that that that
do you know that that feeling is out there i know that feeling exists for a vocal minority
uh what i also know is i get the videos of women saying, thank you, Kevin Samuels, for saving
my marriage.
Kevin Samuels is the reason I'm engaged.
And if you watch my show, Instead of the Eclipse, you'll see women all the time coming on saying,
you know what?
When I first heard you, I didn't know what to think about it, but I sat back and listened
to it myself, end to end.
And I can't deny, I agree with a lot of things you're saying.
I've even tried
some of these things
and I'm a better friend,
a better daughter,
a better sister,
a better cousin,
a better wife,
a better girlfriend.
My current generations
and my future generations,
thank you.
So I'll take any of the critics
because what they don't do,
they don't come
and actually talk to me
when I have my smoke show.
I open it up at least every 30 to 45 days and say, and you have plenty of notice.
Come on, let's talk about it.
Let's talk about it.
So, you know, I believe there's a certain amount of people who are detractors.
And I also think my name is kind of popular right now, so it makes for good clicks.
But if you really have a problem with it,
let's talk about it.
And that never really tends to happen.
Got it.
What's your background?
How did you kind of get started into your show?
Well, it's a long path.
You can paraphrase.
My background is pretty much this.
I spent most of my adult life in corporate sales.
That's how I actually got to New York City. Spent some time in advertising and marketing, but the net of it is, as an image
consultant, I was finding my male clients, when they were coming in, becoming the best version
of themselves, they kept coming back with the same thing. Looking for women, women on my level,
my new level, my adjusted level, and I'm not finding any women who really are fitting what
I'm looking for. Now, see, what we have been told is a lot of guys don't want relationships
or marriage or this or that, and that's really kind of the opposite. But many of the guys are
saying, I'm trying to find somebody who wants to work with me and not wanting to be at odds with
me. So I came onto YouTube years ago speaking to men.
Three plus years of videos just speaking to men and no one cared.
But around June of last year, after I did a show that was almost like a shark tank kind of show,
I started speaking to women because I've been speaking to women since 1989.
Back when we were doing these things on college campus. We'd have these relationship seminars, these dating seminars, back when Shahar Azad Ali's book came out and caused all that whirlwind.
We've been talking about relationships for the longest.
So just like anybody else, I got a point of view and an opinion, and I just started talking to women about some of the things I've seen and a lot of things I'm hearing from men.
And that kind of caught a moment.
And of course, one video got onto Worldstar and it had some traction.
But of course, you know, the average best video is the one that really blew up.
And I said, you know, over 200,000, that wasn't about me.
That's about us.
That video did numbers that I've looked on their page and I haven't seen videos with eight years with that amount of views.
People were from coast to coast to contact me and told me over the weekend they were watching the entire video and having like love in lock ins and having this conversation.
It started a conversation.
And my thing is, is actually started a conversation with women that men have always
been having
we had this conversation
on the basketball court
playing dominoes
spades in the barbershop
and when we can
take them
no cussing signs off
when we can be men
like we grew up being
not these new
grass eating lions
like we have to be today
no cussing in the barbershop
you know men can't be men anywhere
we actually say
what is on our mind now the things that a lot of men are wanting are the same thing they've
always wanted, cooperation. But that's what men across the border seem to get in diminished
quantities. And what we do hear is we hear it all from one side, from color purple to exhaling to
everything else. We hear what women want.
Great.
Well, I have one question to the women.
What do the kind of men you want from a woman?
And that's when you get cricket-ass quiet.
You can't ask that shit, man.
Well, the problem is—
Could you give the man some credit for grass-eating lions?
Give him some credit for grass-eating lions.
Listen, man.
The problem is you used to
could not ask
because before,
I mean,
you know,
you guys are used
to all this.
You're artists,
musicians,
and everything else.
I come from
the corporate side.
But one thing I do know,
52 years old,
that if you needed to,
if you wanted to get out
and speak to the public,
you had to go through
some sort of FCC
regulated something.
ABC, NBC, CBS,
PBS, if there was anything,
and then outside of New York City,
you know, AM, FM radio,
the media was controlled.
And the media's job is to sell
advertising, which I sold.
And if you're going to have programs on
during the daytime, you better sell advertising
to the people who, you got to give them
the program they want.
Even Gillette is,
Gillette.
Razors.
Is sitting around telling men how to be new kind of men.
Now you got a men's product,
luxury men,
on how to be better men.
I'm like,
what a French,
what,
where are the women's products
telling women,
how about just be nice?
Softer side of Sears.
Just be nice. I mean mean so what we haven't done is we
the the marketplace this does what it does if 73 cents out of every dollar is spent in this
country spent by women you better give a marketing message to the people who spend the money that
makes sense problem is we get an unbalanced um of things And the net of it is
The modern dating environment
Is not working
It's falling apart
And people are not getting together
Here, other places
The hookup economy
All these things are existing
And here's the thing
Women are unhappy with the outcomes
Women are vocal about their
Women have no problem being vocal
about the things they don't like. Men
have learned
not to say anything.
You fucking right we did.
Yeah we did.
No we did. I know I agree.
Some of me
has to believe
that you have to subscribe
to some of the myths
of the woman that you want to sleep with
well i will say this men have learned that if i say too too much truth
i will be canceled i'll lose money i'll lose deals i'll lose this especially entertaining
so it becomes so it becomes who buys the concert tickets and the shirts and everything else? So men in a business interest, we're practical.
We're cost-benefit calculators.
What's the benefit to what I'm going to say versus the cost?
Now, what's happened is, I hate the term social media.
Social media has happened.
So it has democratized the access to the airwaves. The smartphone and high-speed internet access has taken away,
has leveraged the power that the TV stations, the cable stations,
and the radio stations used to have.
You needed to go to them to build an audience.
Now you can build your own audience.
And I just built an audience talking about the things that matter to my audience
and now so so now but so now they can't quote unquote counsel you as easy they still can but
um you still have different outlets there have always been men saying
uh things that are kind of pushing the envelope um but now it's becoming
I want to say more acceptable uh it's becoming, I won't say more acceptable.
It's starting to happen
with more frequency,
I'll say that.
Okay.
I agree.
Wholeheartedly.
Anybody in here familiar
with Jordan Peterson?
No.
Dr. Jordan Peterson.
Dr. Jordan Peterson,
he's a psychologist
out of Canada.
He made a big splash by rejecting a mandate from the from from the government of Canada,
basically saying that you have to call somebody by their designated pronoun that they chose.
It wasn't that he didn't want to call them by their pronoun.
He just rejected to be the the man, just rejected to be the codification of speech.
He didn't want his free speech to be incurred upon. So he became worldwide phenomena for basically
standing up saying, you cannot in law tell me how I have to address somebody. I can choose to do
that or not. And he's never said he wouldn't do that he just
said he doesn't want it to be law men like that um are starting he started a movement more or less
i would say not started movement he's he's caught a wave on the movement and he went from being
really relatively unknown to in a short period of time gaining two million followers on youtube make earning like four five
hundred thousand dollars a month on patreon and he's a professor in canada and you know one of the
when one of the things that he said that slipped under the radar he basically told men to you need
to go clean up your room basically saying men need to be men But what got him in hot water was the fact that he actually just said,
you can't tell me how I have to speak to somebody in law.
And however, on the other side, you have no problem how you speak to us.
And that's where we kind of are right now.
What most of my critics never say is what I'm saying is wrong.
They just don't like the tone.
The delivery.
The delivery or the harshness.
Or it's not what they want to hear.
Or let's be honest.
Who the hell do you think you are to even say something like that?
Well, to that, you say what?
Because let me tell you, sir, if I was calling somebody, hey, ma, you built like Emmett Smith, I would have a long week.
I would have a long week.
You would.
Okay.
Can't say that.
Why?
Let me ask you this, though.
No, no, no, no, no.
Conversely, conversely, when he's asking a woman that only wants a certain type of man, what is your entitlement, your personal entitlement?
Why do you feel that you can get this? If it was a woman saying she wanted a certain type,
I mean, if it was a man saying he wanted a certain type of woman, women will all come to
in masses and droves saying, you don't qualify for her.
Well, why can't he say it? And that's the doctor that he just referenced saying, yo, you can't tell me by law what I can say.
Right.
They're telling him the same thing.
Like, you can't say that.
Shoot.
I don't want no scrub.
A scrub is a guy that can't get no love from me.
Hanging out the passenger side of his best friend's ride, trying to holler at me.
Women have no problem telling men what they don't want.
Matter of fact, they can become rich saying it.
At all.
And if I just happen to say, ma'am, and I was wrong, she actually weighed more than Emmitt Smith or Barry Sanders.
I mean, and see the thing is,
let's flip it up.
Women have no problem
telling men under five foot seven,
I don't want no short dude.
I don't want no short dude.
Think about on my show
that women call into my show
voluntarily.
They know what it is
and they're calling in saying,
regardless of their situation,
I want a man
who's making the kind of money
to be able to provide
for a family of two or three or better.
I don't want to have to work to pay significant bills.
And regardless of how I come to the table, that's what I want.
And I ask, why can't you just get an average regular guy?
All the time.
And how often do these women laugh?
See, we have no problem when women are laughing at half the male population or more.
That's true.
But when a man just happens to say, you know what, ma'am?
Objectively, you weigh more than a man at your height.
But listen to this, though.
Now, again, Kevin already said that he's coming from that corporate side.
We have this conversation all the time.
What's happening now, currently in entertainment, the women are the ones that's kicking ass out here.
No, not just entertainment.
The same way that he just spoke about the professor that's kicking ass out here no not just entertainment the same way
corporate america that he just spoke about all the professor that's getting it on patreon
the women have a lot of outlets to where yeah now we're reversing this okay so it's me with the bag
no longer do i have to rely on you adhere to your rules your thinking your demands and that's why
it's up and that's where all these phrases are coming from.
City girl summer.
Wait, wait, wait.
Hot girl summer.
Wait, wait, wait.
So with that being said,
women are killing.
Especially,
kudos to black women.
They're killing
corporate America.
They're killing
all these entrepreneurial ventures.
They're doing
all these amazing things.
Right?
I disagree.
The numbers stay different.
From past? I say different okay I disagree okay
that's the marketing the numbers say different um we we've heard black women you're the most
educated you've heard that right I won't say that but we've heard that we've heard black women are
more most educated you're the most enrolled see, we play slick and loose when we start.
Let me say something.
Set the table.
A man's past or a woman's past or her story is used to mythologize.
A man's past or his story is typically used to demonize.
Black man's past or his story is typically used to villainize you.
So we can say women are doing this women
are doing that they could okay then let's take that women are killing it i accept your premise
they're killing it they're out here entrepreneurs they're business people they're moving and shaking
city girls summer blah blah why i want to for you on some sort of psych man why are why is the weight
of the typical woman up and why are more women today the most free the most liberated the most
educated the more anything else the least happy of any women has ever existed i can i can't speak to their i can't
because they're not because because the things that typically make women happy
are relationships they've calibrated they're the they're the social of the two and many women
have all the things that on paper are supposed to make you happy, but they don't have the relationship or the family.
And that is where this is all falling apart.
I mean, you got to think about it.
If I was not saying something that makes sense, why do I have anywhere from 20 to 30,000 people watching consistently, even with the women being so angry?
Because what they're recognizing is something is missing when I used to have my MIT my
men in training seminars I would say guys the first thing I would do is take
them to a city overlooking downtown I'd say gentlemen life happens out there
number two words life is about people life is about relationships and one
thing this coronavirus pandemic showed to women in general, unfortunately,
black women in particular, is when you shut the world down, you shut it down, you could not go
to work. Many women had to look to the left, to the right, to the front and back, and there was
nobody there. No husband, no kids, no family, no network. They're just sitting there. And that gave
them a glimpse into their possible future.
All things being equal. If you keep living the way you're living, this is what it's going to end up being.
And it panicked people for the first time because it took an act of God to actually start this conversation.
That's when my podcast started picking up, because for the first time, men and women were at home.
Men have always known this. Let me tell you, just not to interrupt.
Can I get some applause?
As someone.
I need some applause.
As someone whose podcast was rocking before the pandemic, boy, was I mad at all you new flourishing podcasts.
Get out of here.
But yeah, we'll hit the round of applause.
Listen to what he just said.
Let me hit the round of applause like you asked.
I'm scared to fucking... No, it took an act of God for somebody to now do some self...
soul-searching...
But won't it always?
Yeah, but again, for women that are speaking against him, right?
The corporate movers and shakers.
Well, and the funny thing is, it's a certain kind of woman's loud.
It's typically college educated,
mid-30s.
And they realize that I'm Generation X.
I say we were lied to.
We were sold a bill of goods.
I talked about how Cosmopolitan magazine
marketed a lifestyle to women.
They wanted to be the playboy women.
I did a broadcast about that two months ago,
talking about the book subverted,
how they openly admit that we lied to a generation of women just to sell you
products.
I don't begrudge us for how we got here,
but we got to acknowledge if one out of four of you in our community,
one out of four women will marry anybody,
black women,
man,
anybody that means three out of four of you will die unmarried. That matters once you are past hot girl summer
and once you pass your earning potential. Once all that stuff is gone, then what? And see,
that's what started to happen. And it's all been conversation until that. If you went to the grocery store in March
of 2020, the first time I'd ever seen fear in women's eyes is when they were there.
Because what I tended to see in Atlanta, in the grocery store, I tended to see a lot of guys.
But unfortunately, when I saw a black woman, I tended to see her there, no ring on and panicking, no water, no toilet paper.
I'm like, this is like the real live book of Eli walking dead. This is what it looks like when
the world that men built that you don't need stops running. And I don't just talk about things from
just a look standpoint in this. And then I say, OK, many women don't really understand what they need a man for outside of provision and sex.
But the pandemic showed that, you know what, having somebody to the right of you to help for many other things is valuable.
That's why this show was kind of picked up. Now, who are the women who typically are upset?
One, the women who typically know they're not trying to be anywhere other than a partner.
The word submission is a curse word. The word is all these newfangled things.
The women who tend to be making more than the average woman who actually thinks being with a man limits her versus frees her up.
I'm like, all right.
And the net of it, I ask all women, even women who say don't like me.
Are they coming into interactions with men in good faith?
Or is there already coming in thinking that something's going to go wrong?
Or are they coming in with fear and scarcity and lack in their mentality?
Is there any hope when you deal with a man, or is it always,
I want a man who's this, this, this, this, this, this, this whole laundry list of stuff to where he's having to deal with issues,
traumas, things that you've not resolved in your past,
and you take that to the next man, and you say, all right,
then what is he going to get in exchange for that me see i just think that everything he just said is applicable
to both yeah it is i agree it is that's all i'm totally with him definitely like listen a lot of
my favorite restaurants they didn't make it out the pandemic they didn't make a lot of my a lot of my favorite restaurants, they didn't make it out the pandemic. They didn't make it.
A lot of my homies and what they did,
I was blessed that I was in a field
where we were thriving.
But yeah, people was fucked up out there.
So I saw panic in the street.
I heard panic when my peoples was on the phone.
From both.
Listen, I went on the internet
and gave my money away.
I believe you.
But what he's saying is for these independent thinkers, quote unquote, that always tout that they don't need a man.
I don't need no man for this.
I don't need no man for that.
God just showed you.
Yes, you do.
Well, see, the difference is.
Do they really need them?
The difference is.
Yes.
The difference is men have always understood that ain't nobody coming to save you.
Ain't nobody coming to save you. Ain't nobody coming to save you.
The world doesn't care about your problems
because all you got to do
to see what happens to a man
who's been on Wall Street
and now he's living in a park.
We know that can happen to us.
Women of any society
have been shielded
from the harshness of the world.
Well, when you can't continue
to shield women from that,
then they have to start
dealing with it you as a man know if i'm driving a car i gotta be able to handle what happens with
coming with this most women just think i'll just call somebody i got that something's gonna happen
and and so what does that mean what is that could just call somebody what's wrong with that we don't
have that watch. Watch this.
But that comes with
a certain realization.
The point I'm getting to
is that women,
men of a society
have always known
if you can't produce
a cover for yourself,
the streets or the park
is for you.
Right.
Women don't.
They will make a demand
of society.
Go to Korea.
Go to Japan.
Those are two countries that are dying. Their population is aging out.
People are being found living in their places dead for three or four days.
It's called Kodokoshi. They gave it a name because the people under 35 are not marrying and dating.
But here's the thing. You have women who are pet groomers, florists, teachers.
That's not rich money.
But they make demands of society.
I told a story the other day.
When I was broke in school, I had to sell a textbook.
I had to go without.
Tighten your belt.
Men talk about, we talk about how broke it was, eating sardines and all that.
Cup of noodles. You didn't want eating sardines and all that. Cup of noodles.
You didn't want no sardine smoke with me.
But when I actually started dating a woman
who was in another school,
she was eating well.
Shrimp, crab, lobster,
and everything else.
I'm like,
where you getting all this money
and all you broke?
Food stamps.
He's like,
I'm a college student.
I can qualify for food stamps.
That never would have crossed my mind
to go get food stamps.
Because men accept, if I don't have it, I don't get it.
Women have been shown that if I don't have it, someone will do it for me.
I could do you know what for.
And it's like, you know, I had a program where I asked a woman, and she's like, no, I was talking about survival.
And for the women who think I'm full of shit,
go do this.
Go watch,
go to Amazon Prime.
Go watch Bear Grylls,
The Island, season two,
where they drop a group of men
on one island,
a group of women on an island
for six weeks
and they got to just survive.
By the end of day one,
men that got from one side
to the other
made a beachfront
and start building
and doing things thriving
by the end of six weeks
men had damn near
made the internet
and this is what he says
I saw the interview
by the end of fifth week
by the end of week five
what the girls doing
by the end of week five
they were still trying
to lead by committee
because no
because no one
they didn't want to be
led by nobody
well green house girls
don't be like each other
that's the point though
they have a system
the first thing three minutes without water three minutes without air three days without water Girls don't be like me. That's the point, though. They have a system.
First thing, three minutes without water, three minutes without air, three days without water, three weeks without food.
Women cut their water-making ability in half because they didn't want to wash out a container.
Because these were modern British women who have grown up not having to do anything except go to the grocery store.
This that you don't need a man in your house because you got 9-1-1.
Yeah. But what happens when these systems stop working?
Yes. When there's no more.
So I will say this, that men and women, while we may have the similar situations, men understand that I got to get it out of the mud. I got to disagree with you a little bit though because there's a lot of women
because there was no man figure there
having to get it out of the mud.
Where did they get it from?
Survivor women?
They had to.
There was nowhere else to get it from.
Such as what?
I'm talking about women with multiple kids
that if they don't bring it home,
the kids ain't eating.
So they're going to do whatever.
He's saying where did they go get it from?
Yeah, where's the-
They went out and got it.
So they say food.
Where'd they get the food from?
Well, they went and made some-
They did whatever they had to do to make some money to get this food.
Such as?
Whether it's-
I mean, listen, from the top to the bottom.
They out there on the pole.
So if you prostituted yourself, where'd you get that money from?
You got it from a man.
Yeah, but some-
Not all women, single mothers are prostitutes.
I'm giving- No, I'm going to the bottom. I'm going all the way to the bottom this is what i see this
is what tends to happen i accept your premise but where they get it from because legally where
they get it from work two jobs work yeah work a couple jobs so you say this still comes from a
man well no no no no i'm not saying that because what i'm asking is were these women getting any
kind of government aid?
Sometimes.
Yeah, probably sometimes.
Sometimes not. That's a man.
No, let's be honest.
You got Section 8 food stamps.
It's still coming from the government, which is the taxpayers are men.
I know single mothers that don't receive assistance.
I use my mom's as an example.
We know they exist.
All of our parents were getting it out of the mud. We know they exist. All of our parents were getting out the mud.
We know they exist, but still, women use the system more than men do.
So when we say they get it out of the mud, you tell me getting out of the mud,
and there's the same mud that men would have to get it out of.
Okay, but that's not the woman's fault.
Wait, so say anything about fault. It's not same mud That men would have to get it out of Okay but that's not The woman's fault Wait
So wait
It's not about fault
I'm not gonna knock the women for that
If
A guy could go
A guy could go get on the system
If he was a single
If he could try that
Like you said
The college student
You didn't know to get on food stamps
You didn't think about
No I didn't know
Because I don't
Because I don't
Because I know as a man
That's not
That's not what it's there for
It's not to eat shrimp
And lobster and crab.
But you...
Not just that, they're not as willing to...
This is what I'm saying to Ice's point.
I do know that this exists, what he's saying.
But, like, did you ever hear that
there's a bit that says
if white people could be dropped in any era and choose what they wanted to be, they would choose white.
Because why wouldn't they choose white?
All of this bullshit comes with being white.
So that's what I feel like with the women.
Yeah, all of this exists.
Absolutely right.
But why would they ever want to change that?
That's like a superpower but then wait
wait wait hold up let me answer you if i could just sit down and send my and and say something
and it come to me now now watch this you can't pick and choose though when you want the best
all the time so wait don't cut me off you know how many people going to the gucci store spending
they should be just seen it
With these checks they getting
Yeah
Niggas is taking the checks
And going to the mall
I know
So I think that's common
Hold on
So to answer your question
If you can't
And that's the truth
If you have an advantage
It's not human nature
To want to give up the advantage
Indeed
Here's the problem
Don't complain about
The people who give you the advantage
Exactly Because see I hear a lot of this Women get it out of the mud and this such so forth and
then i ask questions three levels deep and it all falls apart because it's like well
they're really not getting it like like i'm saying they're getting it it's and it's different because
the bottom line is men understand you have to produce men Men produce in mass. Women consume in mass.
Of course, we can find anecdotal exceptions across the board.
But in general, I have a year worth of a show talking to women across from one thing to another.
And when given an opportunity, women want men to be providers.
Fine.
But are you the traditional women that you,
but are you the traditional woman
that a man is supposed to provide for?
No.
And that's my point.
So my point is,
you can't pick and choose
when you want a traditional old school guy.
My grandma,
my grandfather did X, Y, and Z.
My grandfather provided
and your grandmother shut up
and took what came with that.
Your grandmother knew how to cook a sweet potato pie. You don't. Your grandfather had pie you don't your grandpa so you can't pick and choose when you want to be a
new era woman and then and when it benefits you be an old school woman you can't do that you can't
say i want a traditional relationship over here when it's beneficial and then now you want to be
a new age woman when it's beneficial you can't do that you can't say you get what i'm saying like you want to go out to one thing one thing that bothers people about my show is i'm just like i talk to
women who call into the show in real time i'm not just i'm not making it up you can go hear what
they're saying and many women are like what are you going to argue with i had a woman 31 years
old the other day talking about the same thing.
God going to send me a husband.
God going to send me a husband.
God going to send me a husband.
Then it turns out that,
you know,
it's up on my channel right now.
Do you know how to cook?
Do you know how to do this?
Do you know how to do that?
Are you a Christian wife?
Are you talking about God
with these long eyelashes
and everything else?
And it turns out that
you said I'm a cooperative woman and I'm a Christian,
but then when I ask you about your previous relationships,
you run the men off because of your mouth.
Now, what we've been told is the problems in relationships,
the problems, what we've been told and marketed to
from Color Purple, which was BS,
there was a controversy around the Color Purple.
At the time it released, go look at it.
It's still on microfiche.
They said the impact that movies had on the black culture
is catastrophic.
Before 1965, we were married at a rate of 80%.
80%, the most married people in Jim Crow segregation
and everything else.
But after that, what do we have?
Now we get
Color Purple,
Waiting to Exhale,
you know,
we mentioned
Brother Tyler Perry
and all his movies.
We get a woman's side of it
and it's always
the man of the problems.
Okay.
But there's a reason
we always get
the woman's side of it.
No, I said that this morning.
Did I not?
There is a reason.
I said that this morning.
I know that's the reason
it's profitable.
I don't really like it. It's profitable. Pac told Perry movies. It's profitable. I don't really like it.
It's profitable.
Pac told us the women buy the album.
I don't really like.
And I don't like that narrative that Tyler Perry preaches.
He's a black man.
You got to congratulate and appreciate everything he's done.
But in Tyler Perry movies, if you watch most of the narratives, the wealthy black man.
Is the villain.
Ain't shit.
Yeah, he's not.
He ain't shit. The broke black man is the villain ain't shit yeah he ain't shit he's
the broke black man is the savior so it's dark-skinned rich black man abuser then light-skinned
bomb blue collar yes with a love not bomb but with a love for jesus gonna come and save and
restore you and see the thing thing is all right so what we don't have is the other side of the
story sister shahara zahra lee in 1989 wrote that book, The Black Man's Guide to Understanding a Black Woman.
She took a lot of heat for that. And if you go back and look at some of the stuff on Donahue,
Geraldo, she was saying some of the same things that everybody else in this country has had their behaviors and everything examined,
except in our community with our women.
The black woman.
Black women have been held apart from the consequences
or accountability for their choices.
You're free to make your choices.
You can want what you want,
but accept what comes along with it.
And this is why, you know,
so many women are like,
well, who are you to even say something?
Now, wait a minute.
You can talk about you don't want no scrub and this and that. Y'all can say some of the most egregious stuff, why you know so many women are like well who are you even say something now wait a minute you can
talk about you don't want no scrub and this and that y'all can say some of the most egregious
stuff but if a man just happens to speak a truth then all of a sudden he needs to be canceled he's
satan he's a man he's gay he don't like women he yeah i have i have a push i i i have a pushback
for you okay what do you say to the women that have no problem with you saying the things that you say, but that have an issue with you profiting from the things that you say?
That's ridiculous.
Yeah, that makes no sense.
It doesn't?
No, it doesn't.
Yeah, that makes no sense.
Did these same women have a problem with Steve Harvey, the prophet?
Yeah, so again.
When you cater to them, do they have a problem with you monetizing it?
So again,
this is a unique issue
for a black man.
Gordon Ramsay can profit
from calling you
a stupid effing little monkey
and have Hell's Kitchen.
Simon Cowell can tell you,
are you serious?
And they love him.
But if a black man,
see the rules for black men
are unique.
Indeed.
We're supposed to do everything
and ask for nothing.
Nothing.
Yet, Olivia, Scandal and all these different shows,
they can profit showing some of the worst behaviors.
But see, it's a black woman.
Or you can get up and pander to black women and tell them,
you know, see, nobody, everybody talks about,
you've been divorced, y'all don't say to steve harvey that's what i just said a lot of them told me that you
were divorced i died yeah that's not who the hell they say who the hell is he to tell people
hold on but see here's the thing when we don't like what a black man says then we try his past
see nobody cares when you're saying what's what uh when you're telling
what they want to hear and what does it have to do with anything two plus two is four i use a lot
of facts data statistics that anyone can go look up themselves and that's what bothers them because
it's not an argument it's like well we really do what what you know what the real party is they
piss because i'm not on it i'm not i'm not kissing their ass and telling what they want to hear
see if i was doing what everybody else did oh they make me a multi-millionaire i don't need it But you know what the real part is? They pissed because I'm not kissing their ass and telling them what they want to hear. Indeed.
See, if I was doing what everybody else did, oh, they would make me a multi-millionaire.
I don't need it.
Well, no, no, no.
Let me give you one more reason they pissed too now.
Hold on.
Let me give it to you.
Your sweetie take.
They was on your ass.
Which one?
Which one?
The one.
Oh, the one he called us.
Yeah, he called us.
Six?
He called us six.
He called us six.
I called her adjustable.
They was on your sweetie. I called her an adjustable six
I missed the adjustable part
adjustable six
yeah
what the hell
but no no no
watch this
but he's the same guy
that ranks Beyonce at an eight
don't stop
ish
I want to hear what he has to say
about calling Sweetie a six
an adjustable six
meaning she can go
from cute to pretty
but see when I'll judge women
I don't judge them.
I judge women by the same metric.
And this is where people get into the image consulting thing.
I look at you, fresh face, no makeup, your natural state.
And if you have ever seen her pictures, fresh face, natural state, she's a cute woman who can be pretty.
But I don't think she's ever going to be considered to be beautiful or gorgeous that does not mean she's bad but there
has to be a way she's already considered beautiful and gorgeous but he's saying strip away all of the
accessories and you get what you get see if you this is why when i use when i talk about a scale
there's first off there are people who hate the whole notion.
There's a scale or there's a Eurocentric standard of beauty.
I'm like, look, Pam Greer, go back to the 70s.
Pam Greer is an eight.
Yes.
Jackie Kennedy.
She looks good.
But the thing is, back then you would have seen someone like Diane Carroll.
She's up in that nine category.
Dorothy Dandridge would have been up around that 10 area.
There's always going to be levels to this.
But what women today are saying is they're all 10s.
And they don't believe that.
They don't believe that themselves.
But this is where, listen, man.
It's PC.
If I have a, if I, because everybody got a platform today.
Listen, man.
It's PC.
If I have a, if I, because everybody got a platform today, and if on my platform I'm a woman and I got 30 million people that if I say that wall is blue, they're going to say the wall is blue with me, then what the fuck do it matter what else is happening in the real world, right?
Because that's all these kids are doing on the internet.
No, that's not true, though, because then you get into a realism situation versus an idealistic situation.
So idealistically,
you can say every woman is a 10,
every woman is beautiful.
But do you really
go home and believe that?
That's when they do.
No, because if you believe that,
you wouldn't be buying
a shitload of makeup
every fucking day.
You wouldn't take an hour
to get dressed
before you leave the house
making up your face
if you thought you were a 10 already.
And that's the point
I'm going to make because people say, well, you can't say this, that. If that's the case, then walk out of the house making up your face if you thought you were a 10 already and that goes to my and that's the point i'm going to make because people say well you can't say this that was like if that's
the case then walk out of the house exactly if you think in your heart of hearts that you're a 10
i like women that wear makeup and dress fly man i don't know
but make guys makeup has always existed it Why did, why when you go back
in the 70s,
did you see women
with minimal makeup?
They didn't even have
veneers and this and that.
That was just
their natural state.
There was a movie called
I'm Gonna Get You Suck.
I'm Gonna Get You Sucker.
And what was that,
Tracy,
what was that one lady's name?
Real thin woman.
I know the scene
you're talking about too.
Yeah,
Keenan Ivory Wayans
takes her home from the club.
And he's like,
well,
I gotta tell you, I really don't have a 12 inch.
She's like, that's okay.
My eyes aren't really green.
She starts taking her contact off.
And it was a joke because she takes her contacts off.
Her hair.
Her wig off.
She takes off her fake buck and everything else.
That was a joke in the 90s.
Ha ha.
No, it ain't a joke.
That's what it is today.
That's what it is.
You walk around Atlanta today and there are men dressed like women who look like women because of the excessive makeup, the colored hair and all the long fingernails.
You're like, OK, this excessive adornment is for who?
It ain't for you, you, you, you, you or me.
It's for them.
We don't like that.
Men have been asking for women to have your natural look, your hair your natural shape your natural beauty for the longest but they'll
tell you we do it because you like white women or this or that men aren't asking for this stuff
men are men are not asking people who make middle income to spend seven hundred dollars on a lace
front wig but in or buy two thousand dollar shoes but Hold on one second. But if you do it, baby.
Right. I was getting ready. In their defense
though, because I talk to a lot of women
and they'll say, yeah,
you claim y'all like natural this,
that, and the third, but what pictures
you liking on Instagram? I like it all.
So watch this.
I'm just saying, this is their point. Watch this.
Out of all of the women that we know, right?
And be honest
here how many of them are getting a ring you got all these accessories you got this fat ass you got
all this makeup is it really working not my place to say well what if that's not my place and i'm
from your own observation oh i haven't been running around looking for that no but you know
people that get married i don't know you get what lot of married women. You get what I'm saying?
I don't know a whole lot of married women.
I'm going to go back to what you said because this happens all the time.
Women will say, yeah, you say you don't want one thing, but what are you liking on this?
I am so damn tired of women telling men what we think and what we want.
We say what we want and you know why this is?
Because 80% of us was raised by women and we are so used to women leading us, they think they own us.
Yeah.
And they don't.
That's true.
We're the only group of men that demure to our women.
Go over to Chinatown and see if this shit happens.
Go over to the Middle East.
Go ask Mohammed or Ahmed what they don't put up with this mess.
Go ask Muhammad or Ahmed They don't put up with this mess
We put up with it because we have such an
Irrational, dysfunctional reverence
For women in our culture
Because we have a matriarchy
To where they try to make us question our own minds
It's our fault though
Would you agree with that?
Ultimately the black man is leaving the household
I will say that there is
I want to be careful when I say that
Because that's going to get misused.
There are some structural things that happened that, okay, in the 60s, when the Great Society came in,
Lyndon Johnson put in the Great Society, they did not expect to happen what happened.
Go read the Monaghan Report and monaghan scissors they did not expect to give
government system the food stamps to the black community and for women to choose the check over
the men over the men they were actually confused as to why this happened it was like wait a minute
we thought we would give this to you for a little bit and then once you kind of got stable or
then you get back but no no no they took the benefit so is it the man's fault
that you were locked out of unions
unable to get equal jobs
and things like that
no
it's not their fault
it's your ultimate responsibility
that you were not able to provide
for a family you have
yet
you can go look at it yourself
prior to 1960
65
We were married at a rate of 80%
Broke
Jim Crowed
Segregated
Lynched
Everything else
But we had us a community
We had HBCUs
We had churches
We stuck together
We had black business
We had black buses
This that that
But as soon
As it came in
When the women were given a choice
Far more chose this over the men
and that's what that's the that's the original quote-unquote sin that we have yet to deal with
in the black community that makes black men feel some kind of way and black women don't like to
acknowledge the fact of that i have a question question for you. I have two other things.
Okay, but are you taking that statistic of the rate at which black women are marrying, right?
Mm-hmm.
And saying they're unable to marry
versus the modern woman today
maybe just not viewing marriage
the way she was brought up to view it.
One out of four,
26% of black women were married.
The next lowest rate is 54% of white women.
Still double.
Double.
Still double.
And if that was your mantra
that marriage is not as important,
you wouldn't put the stipulation
that I can only submit to a man
that makes a certain dollar amount. So you're open submit to a man that makes a certain dollar amount.
So you're open to marriage when a man makes a certain dollar amount, but if he falls beneath
that threshold, you're closed off to marriage.
But that's only in the black community.
That's us.
That's only for black men.
That's us.
That's us.
Because let's go ahead and go all the way in since we're going there.
That's us.
The stipulation is a black man has to be a superhero.
You got to be able to provide four or five times the rate
of what any other man would provide.
And you got to be a sexual professional.
See, if you don't have all those things,
you're not high value.
You're not quality.
And that's what my show has kind of shown.
It's let women say what's on their mind.
He does.
He asks a series of questions.
I just let you say what's on your mind.
And they answer them.
And then based on your answers,
he assesses the data
that you've given him
via his questions.
I don't know why they'd fall
for some of them questions.
Because they're speaking
because they don't see it.
If you've ever seen them.
No, no, no.
But again,
before they get tripped up
they think they hold some
I'm going to get him.
I'm going to teach him.
Ma'am, blah, blah, blah.
Ma'am, he don't
and to all the people that says he's harsh and brash,
I've seen enough of them where he starts off the interview
mild-mannered, respectful.
I reflect what I get back.
Exactly.
Ma'am, ma'am, ma'am, ma'am, please stop cutting me off.
Ma'am, you called my platform to get advice.
Let me advise you.
A lot of the things.
And when he says something that they don't want to hear.
Anybody in there over 40?
Yes, me.
Okay. Ah, you like that go back go back to when you were 10 years old i want you to think
imagine a 20 year old woman speaking to a 50 year old man you wouldn't hear the tone the the the way
in which i see many 20 year old women Approaching a man That's true
In particular
Calling in my show
Talking to me like
I'm your age
I'm like well
So there is no
With some
With far too many women
There is no
Level of credibility
A man has
Where he can't be checked
See one of the things is
what you tend to hear more
often than anything else is,
why'd you go on his show, girl?
If that was me,
I'd have cussed him out.
See, there's a problem.
Women are,
we've allowed one-way violence
in our community
for far too long.
One-way aggression.
See,
all these men in this room
know that there are lines
that we can't cross because
fuck this podcast we're gonna have to go handle business outside because there's a low level
threat of violence between our men women don't have that so they can say whatever do whatever
be as foul as they want to because it's like so let me get this right you would have went into
that man's place of business and cussed him out as if you could do something.
And they can.
With no recourse.
Because they assume, because if you touch me, then I'm going to call somebody.
Which is who?
The police.
Which is a man.
A white man.
A man.
And it's typically, you're not expecting, when you think about who's going to show up, you're not expecting a woman to show up.
You're expecting a man to show up.
And let's be honest, most are expecting a white man to show up.
I'm like, you've got to think of the level of disrespect.
All men are asking is for women to be nice and cooperative.
That is it.
They're not asking for you to be supermodels,
IG models. They're just asking, can you
just be nice, cooperative,
fit,
and childless?
Is that much to ask for?
But that's a huge lift today.
Kev, you can't throw the childless at you.
Yeah, you can. No, I'm joking.
I'm joking, but once you
reach a certain age. No, I can throw it in there. I'm going to tell you why I'm going to throw it in there. I'm joking, but once you reach a certain age.
No, I can throw it in there.
I'm going to tell you why I'm throwing it in there.
I'm not going to back off that because, look, there are too many forms of birth control.
I'm 52 years old.
When I used to go into the grocery store to ask for condoms, they'd clown you.
We need a price check on condoms.
Because especially where I'm from, they thought they could morally justify it.
But now we have, women have access to over 33 forms of birth control
before and or after.
They're all kind of,
they're adoption, all these things.
No child gets born today
that a woman did not want to carry.
I mean, to carry the full term.
That's her choice.
I would agree.
So if you choose to have a child
without the benefit
of marriage
fine
but you accept
everything that comes
along with it
cause we
cause there's enough
information out there
to show
that statistically
a child is not going
to be in the best position
to have the best outcome
this way
can it happen
sure
because
flip the script
if men were to
get out here and just make babies reckless they
call you uh they call you something there's a whole bunch yeah so that is this this conversation
right here kev is where is where i was really and really on the hook with just wanting to hear more that you had to say i was watching you with a young
woman and the conversation somehow was just based on hey whatever you did was it best for the child
she was saying she moved she moved to wherever her family was and it was her family that gave
her the advice and i didn't even really want to move, but she was doing all of that.
And you just kept it on. Yeah, I hear you. But was that best for the child?
And I don't even really think she still was getting none. You were saying.
And for me, I was like, oh, see, this is this is deep.
This is deep. That was deep for me because that's been some of my experience in trying to explain or have the conversation like, hey, I know you're looking out for you.
But at what point is it OK for me to say it's not about you and not come off like a dick?
I think that we, especially in our community, have normalized the absentee father.
Right. And so when women are making these decisions these choices the father's wants don't
even really come into the decision making well yeah right other than that yeah it's for i mean
we've normalized prosperity and the prospect like coming from the christian church when the
prosperity gospel can't start coming in i don't want to get too religious in this but we've
we've normalized that you deserve to live your best life. Your happiness as an individual is paramount. And when you tell
people that, then that means I'm up here and everything else is a secondary concern.
So when I turn around and say marriage ain't about love or romance, it's about duty. What?
We're the most Christian folks.
When it comes to the most Christian of unions,
we also want to get a new wave.
Because somebody mentioned that granddad may have had a family
on the other side of town.
Yeah, but you didn't hear about it
until the funeral.
I didn't.
Because grandma had a duty
to keep her mouth closed
and granddad had a duty to keep it held.
The stuff you hear about your grandparents
and great-grandparents is after they left,
you still hold them in high regard.
You do.
That is true.
Are we as serious of a people as they were?
Hell no.
No.
Because we're a bunch of in our feelings, child, I want to be happy all the time.
Selfish.
Selfish.
Me, me, me, me, me.
Nope.
That's true.
And what do we got?
A dysfunctional.
Everybody's doing their own thing.
Can't nobody say nothing.
A dysfunctional Everybody's doing their own thing
Can't nobody say nothing
As a man
As a grown man
You can look at somebody's kid
That you know is doing something wrong
You can't say nothing
For fear of what their mama
Gonna say this or that
The community's gone
That's true
So we all hear our parents say
Yo when I did something
Out in the street
Mr. Johnson will whoop my ass
And take me home And then my Johnson would whoop my ass and take me home.
And then my parents would whoop my ass too.
I ask this question to women all the time.
All right.
Who leads?
Who leads?
Because if you want the fundamental building block of any government, I mean, sorry, any country, any state, any community, any society is the family.
Is the family. And when it gets right down to it, that's a mother and a father. We are different.
If you have children, you can sit back and know that you and the mother of your child have thought different things about their child.
But whose word follows?
And far too often today, women are leading.
So it's like, well, if I asked you, how do I get to Bergdorf Goodman?
Everybody in here would tell me a different route.
We'd all end up at the same destination.
Women are far too worried about their destination
being right
instead of the,
I mean,
their route being right
instead of the outcome.
A man's nature
is to discipline,
correct structure.
A woman's nature
is to offer
nurture or feelings.
So guess what we get?
We've got a generation
of softer men and a generation of harder
women. They've told their daughters, don't worry
about no man, don't worry about this, get your education,
and so forth. And they've told their sons
quite the opposite.
And then the funny thing is, you end up raising
the very men that you decry
of not being able to lead. So when I
say who leads, forget every one
of the men in this room. Where's the camera?
Fuck us.
Forget us all.
What about your boys?
What about your sons?
What about your boys?
Black boys are reading at a fourth grade level.
The next group of leaders are coming from your sons.
What are you doing with them?
And if you're not, if you have the money to put one of your children to college, is it going to be your son? Are you actually making a differentiation for your son versus your daughters?
Because you want your daughters to have somebody they can lead, but you're not teaching any
kind of leadership in your home.
They get mad when I start talking about this because I'm like, okay, you say in your 30s
all of a sudden you're going to just flip the script and all of a sudden become this
cooperative, submissive woman.
What history do you have with even cooperating with a man?
And I ask the question,
did you have any brothers growing up?
Yeah.
Did your mother serve your father?
Yeah.
Did you serve your brothers?
What?
But you go into a Hispanic family and the-
I was just about to say.
Go to a Hispanic family
and the girls of the family serve the boys.
Now, why is it that a guy
who may have come into this country legally or illegally,
especially if you're in the South, I make this thing all the time, who may have come into this country legally or illegally, especially if you're in the South?
I make this thing all the time.
A guy can come in this country illegally, stand outside a Home Depot or the Day Labor Center and do almost anything, sell oranges, whatever you think.
But go home and get a submissive, respectful, loyal woman.
He ain't got to be a millionaire, but he can get that.
But yet I got to go to Harvard.
Joe's with me often so i had this conversation with one of our female friends and she said demographically the black woman and the asian man are the two like falling you never heard that
groups right and i said why and she said because the black man has no problem dating outside of his race.
And the Asian woman has no problem dating outside of her race.
And I told her, this girl, she makes a nice amount of money.
And I said, yo, because you guys snicker and laugh at the 70, 80 thousand dollar a year man.
And Maria and Becky will welcome him with open arms.
Well, let me tell you, friend, you're full of shit.
Ma'am, you are full of shit.
Black men,
men traditionally are the more racial loyal of any group.
That's it.
Women are the ones that tend to,
because you want to know who dates out the most?
Asian women, white men.
So the net of it is
if black women were as sexually sexually as desired sexually as black men
do you not think they would date out as often as we would but the thing is the black men we start
talking about they are still saying i want a woman with all these situations modern woman this or that
still when we marry we are marrying a black woman at an 86 percent rate
but see they want to talk about the 14 percent that don't do it yeah i don't like that i don't
like that and and if you even take it even further it's really exacerbated when you start getting
into things outside of what i consider corporate america when you start getting into entertainment
athletics uh entertainment athletics uh entertainment athletics the numbers are When you start getting into Entertainment athletics Entertainment athletics Entertainment athletics
The numbers are over represented
Gotcha
But if you look in
Where people are making
You know having to go to work
A traditional nine to five day
Most people marry people
That look like themselves
You see that's a deflection argument
It is
Because at the end of the day
All you got
It's like okay ma'am
Let's accept it
All you got to do is find one
Why can't is find one.
Why can't you find one?
And you ask your friend, have you ever been with a man that's suitable or reasonable?
And here's where it's going to come.
Yeah, back in college, I was engaged once.
Well, why didn't that happen?
Who broke it off?
And I'm going to tell you, almost 100% of the time, they're the ones leaving.
You honestly think that, women honestly think that they can leave a man in their 20s and 30s,
play the field, do what they want to,
in their early 20s,
and then wait later on in life
and get a man that's more valuable
as their value's going down.
That's what's been marketed to them.
But their value, I think you're right.
I'm agreeing with you.
They think, though, that their value is rising because they are making more money.
So the things that they value in a man, they think we value in them.
And that's one of your biggest arguments.
Social markets.
Man, your money matters not to a man that has his own money.
Before y'all have this exchange really quickly, as someone who's been married, do you want to get married again?
I would. I would.
I would.
I would get married again
because if I decide
I want more kids,
which that would be
one situation,
or number two,
you're going to have somebody
at the end of their life.
Word.
But the thing is,
every woman I deal with,
they watch my program.
They hear exactly what I say.
They hear what you stand for.
And they know exactly what I stand for hear what you stand for and I would
tell you it is I don't budge because I've done it twice and I realized that I shouldn't I don't
fault my performing relationships for for not working because I grew up the same way we all
grew up we never I didn't grow up in the position of thinking that you need to be responsible for
everything you need to have a plan and an outcome.
You need to have a place for a woman to nest and not put pressure on them.
Pressure's made for shoulders, not for hips.
See, in the black community,
we saw so many women doing stuff
that I think many men put undue pressure
on a woman that's not really built for the female.
So you'll never hear me talk anything negative about my exes. I take's not really built for the female so you never hear me talk anything
negative about my exes i take 100 responsibility even for the stuff that i could arguably say
fell short on their side not their responsibility um sexual marketplace value is one of the
things that tends to upset women more than anything else so i asked the question
what product on the market increases with age and use?
You put me in a real tough spot
when I have to keep a straight face.
When you say sexual marketplace value.
We quote it.
Sexual marketplace value.
I won't say it anywhere else.
But I perfectly understand.
We all understand it,
but they don't.
And so that's why, yeah.
Women have been told
that college, money,
socioeconomic status, experience
increases your value.
It doesn't.
No.
It doesn't.
It decreases your,
it increases your asking price
because of a thing called hypergamy.
Women typically want men to have at least what they have or more.
So if you wait until you are making a certain amount of money, it's going to be harder for you to accept a man working less.
If you get a certain level of education, this or that, you're going to think it raises your overall value.
So when you hear me ask all women, how tall are you?
And how much do you weigh?
Dress size.
Dress size.
How much do you weigh?
If you had to rate yourself, I'm like, that's your SMB.
That's what it kind of starts.
Then there gets to be a question.
It gets to be a problem because when women rank themselves around the
average range i'm like in what world did average women get above average men
consistently they want to fight you at that point today's world though that's not true well okay
okay hold on hold on now there's a caveat if you are an average woman, you have an above average man
later in life,
he doesn't start that way.
You get in with these young.
See, this whole high value thing
has two components.
Many women want a man
who's already high value.
You don't want to build a bob
or build a boot.
Yeah, no way.
All right, well, great.
Then you go ahead
and hook up with him
when he's getting it out of the mud,
when he's living
in a one bedroom studio and y'all get when he's getting it out of the mud, when he's living in a one-bedroom studio,
and y'all get the, I call it an Ikea marriage.
Y'all get that Ikea marriage.
You know?
What is wrong with this guy, man?
With the one-liner.
Yeah, we all know what Ikea is.
Yeah, because, you know, it look real nice,
but it's particle board and shit.
Y'all get that Ikea marriage, and y'all do that,
and y'all split the, you know,
we'll get one Venti, Mochaccino, Frappuccino
Y'all split that shit
Y'all act like y'all doing something
One scone and everything else
And then you build and build and build
And then once he gets to his place
They don't want that though
Well, I don't care what you want
I don't care what you want
I care what you can get
I agree
And see the thing is
If men don't run around talking about,
I feel, I feel, I feel,
and I want.
Men think, do,
and we accept our situation.
We all want
a certain caliber of woman,
but until you were
in the position
to be able to have
and maintain that,
could you get it?
Could you get it and keep it?
Why is that hard to say for men
that realization we've come to a long time ago i'm not going to shoot for hallie berry if i know
i'm not on hallie berry well hold on or do i feel entitled let me say but see the thing is
i'm gonna say this story but here's the thing is even if you did let's just say i ran let's just
say you ran the hallie berry in new y City, and y'all did do something.
Halle Berry wouldn't all of a sudden be your new level.
You'd say, I caught her one day.
That was an outlier.
Yeah, I caught her one day on a nice little drunk, buzzy night.
That's a story you always got to tell, but all of a sudden you wouldn't walk around thinking,
well, hey, Halle, hey, next time you're in town, let's, what?
No, man, that was tequila.
I ain't got nothing to do with that.
Wait, wait, wait.
Or, or, or, or. Wait, wait. Hey, buddy wait now holly berry's not your standard i got you i don't want sally richardson next and nia long next
and j-lo next and i make 40 grand all that shit is awesome but my point was in today's world so
that example has to continue okay i slept with holly right and i leave thinking the same way
you said oh man what a night man who knew blah blah but
two weeks later another one of them pop up and it happened again I didn't expect that one I didn't
plan for that one either you gotta have a high hey that's pretty cool that that happened twice
I'm gonna go ahead on about my way hey five hours later here go another one wait a second indeed
and now that now the game has changed
now it's not an anomaly
but he answers to them as well
your SMV is then high
well see
for men
do you want me to tell you
about
oh you got it
you don't really
see
look their SMV is high
at that point
see
that's not happening
to average
5'4
170 pound women
that's happening to women
that are bumping into high value men.
I think it is, but that's the minority,
so I'm not going to argue.
It's a minority.
Hold on, hold on.
Here's what's...
And it's sexual.
So a couple of things.
One, men know what your credit rating is
and what your resource is like.
That's what kind of woman you can afford.
That's generally what we know.
We know what our resource pool is and the kind of woman we can afford. Sure, generally what we know. We know what our resource pool is
and the kind of woman we can afford.
Sure, if we got a Halle Berry
or if we got some one-offs,
that does not give you an 800 credit score
and a $400,000 income.
That just gives you the ability
to get it off the lip, some game.
Maybe you're looking right.
Maybe you're smelling right.
Maybe your particular brand or dude
is in style right now
and that's what it is but men are least realistic about that here's what happens though with uh with
women because so many women want these men who are quote-unquote high value and i and i've defined
that you got 100 of women the petra principle going for the top 20 top 10 of men and guys up here you will know that if he can hit
Halle Berry he'll hit it but if he can hit that six and ain't nobody looking he gonna hit that
too the problem is the way women look at that is women look at that man is their new standard
they're like well if I can get him and he's with her that puts me on her level and that's with her, that puts me on her level. And that's not how it works. We look at these things differently.
So it's not as though average women
have not dealt with high-value men
because I account for that on my show.
Many times women say, I deal with high-value men.
I deal with high-value men.
I say, I don't worry about dealing.
Marriage.
We judge by weddings.
And see, that tells the story.
Women are judged ultimately by the kind and caliber of man that they can keep.
And many of these women cannot keep a man like that.
That's true.
Which bothers them because it's like, well, if I can deal with him, well, if you can't keep him, what does it matter?
What bothers a lot of women about my show is that it's really common sense and basic.
It's just telling them something that men know.
You can't have it all.
Life is about choices and trade-offs.
And they don't want to compromise.
You know what I'm talking about.
They want to see you shit on some more men too.
No, they call compromise settling.
They wanted to bring some more men on there.
That's what they call it.
I got three years of that.
See, what they don't do is go back into my catalog
because even on Worldstar,
they put up some of my older videos.
It's all out there.
It is.
And even when I do say stuff to men or non-black women, I don't get credit for that.
I don't get credit for that.
I mean, I had a woman call on the show the other day, and she called herself.
She wanted to start checking a black woman.
I'm like, oh, hell no.
You don't get those kind of privileges over here.
But it's like...
That's not going to get the clicks, though.
Well, so what is it? What is it?
They really want,
they don't want me to say it to be honest,
because what,
because what's starting to happen is I'm not,
I'm not rude.
I'm not,
I'm not cursing you out.
I'm not being,
I'm not initiating drama.
I'm not trolling.
Women are calling into my show voluntarily and we're having conversations in real time.
And what it's starting to do is
it's starting to make it harder
to refute what I'm saying.
The stuff I quote,
you can look up the numbers.
And it's not like I'm just, you know,
calling you a bunch of bitches
and ohs and this and that.
That's the problem.
And it's starting to have an impact.
Now, you know, women are starting to look at things differently. Guys are's starting to have an impact. Now, you know,
women are starting to look at things differently.
Guys are starting to look at things differently.
And the people who really have the issue
are, do they have a desire
to change or improve anywhere?
Or do they think they're right?
That's killer.
Do you really have the ability
to look yourself in the mirror
and say, hey, I need to change a few things?
Don't give me the answer.
No, I'm just saying.
Or is this guy crazy?
I heard what he said.
He hates women.
I love him for a reason.
He's failed in his relationships, blah, blah, blah.
Those are all things that allow you to dismiss everything, all the factual information that's been shared.
It allows you to be dismissive.
Either that or the defensive
thing you immediately go into defense mode when somebody says something that you don't agree with
sign language i gotta go up against two kevin samuels this ain't even so i have something
we knew that i have something called sign language shame insults guilt and the need to be right
uh and typically when i'm starting to get real pushback
especially from a woman shame uh your mama black yep like how can you say this gives a black woman
you owe black women i've heard black women actually say i owe black women because i talk
to black women i'm like do you owe black men? The owe only goes to us,
to you. A black woman raised you in this and that. I'm like, well, wait a minute. Then if the shame
don't work, the insults, you gay, you gay, you gay, you gay. I'm like, you're a grown damn woman.
Are we on a playground? I'm not gay. Part of me being gay, ask a girlfriend if I'm like, you're a grown damn woman. Are we on a playground? I'm not gay.
Part of me being gay, ask your girlfriend if I'm gay.
But it's the same thing.
Gay, gay, gay.
Because that's one of the first insults we want to do.
We want to discredit.
Well, it's even beyond that because it's questioning your manhood.
It's like DMX just passed and now people are wanting to cancel him because of lyrics he made back in the late 90s.
I won't let him.
But the thing is, because we throw that word around too much in the black community.
And I'm like, now, wait a minute.
Black women calling a man gay, but then you, your makeup artist, your hairstylist, and some of your best friends are gay men.
What are you talking about?
And you love them.
Right.
Right.
Because they-
Because they pander into you.
And then the guilt, you know, you're embarrassing us, you know, you're making us look bad.
And I'm not going to say that that's why they love you.
But there's many things.
But the ultimate one is the need to be right.
The need to be right.
That's why it goes on and on.
It's like two plus two is four.
Yeah, but I know a friend. know this i know that and it's like all right are you move are you trying to move
this thing forward are you trying to get a better outcome or do you want things to just be where
they are and that's the thing i don't begrudge what women want what men want anybody wants i
just ask can you get it can you get it what's the likelihood of getting I just ask, can you get it? Can you get it? What's the likelihood of getting it?
And if you can't get it, are you willing to make the changes and adjustments that are going to be needed to get that kind of outcome?
And more often than not, you know, women are saying they don't want more often than not.
Women have never asked themselves that question. They just assumed it was going to happen.
question they just assumed it was going to happen it's like uh this whole notion of getting married um earlier and you asked a lot of especially women in our community they don't think they
should be even considering marriage until 30 30 i'm like well just run the numbers on that 30 you
meet them at 30 six months to a year you're engaged you want to have a year marriage I'm like the numbers don't make sense
six months to a year
is not even engagement time
it's more like
three four years
you're dating
before you get
pop the question
and the thing is
the numbers don't make sense
and let's go all the way
back around
because
there is a financial incentive
to keep men and women
separate because there's a rent for this apartment a a rent for that apartment, power in this, power for that.
There's more money when people are single.
When you're married, you have to actually consolidate households.
There's somebody else who you need to kind of work with.
And your priorities change instead of we're going to go to Cancun, we're going to go to this, we're going to do that.
It's a different environment. That that's interesting i never thought about that
well i mean and this was kind of all laid out in the whole book subverted and the the lies that
were told to middle-class women i was like here's the thing take it away from relationships okay
you don't go sell a piano to somebody in the middle class you don't do that that doesn't
make any sense you're you're you're working the mta you're the post office you're middle class
people you don't sell a piano that makes no sense what you sell is a music room anybody who's
anybody has a music room only the culturally sophisticated people have music rooms you want
to have music in your house because it increases your kids'
cognitive ability and this and that and da-da-da-da.
And, of course, in a music room, you need to have encyclopedias because it has it.
And then people have a music room.
What are they going to need?
They're going to need a piano.
It's genius.
You don't sell.
And there was a method, especially in the black community.
Our dollars circulate six hours.
You know why it circulates six hours?
Because we're hyper consumers.
Even in a pandemic, the line around the Gucci store.
We're just the niggas.
We are hyper consumers.
So even the line around the Gucci store is, and you're not the typical Gucci customer.
But why?
Because we have a household that's feelings.
It's not rooted in logic or outcomes of saying,
all right, you may want a Gucci belt, son,
but you're going to need to go work and make that Gucci money.
Now I'm going to pay you to do this, this, this.
And they're like, wait a minute.
I got to work how many hours to get the money for one belt?
I'm good.
Versus money just comes from a stimulus check or something.
And it just comes.
So we just spend it.
And when I was growing up, everybody didn't expect to have big homes and drive Mercedes.
People were happy with Honda civics and reasonable homes
men not being around we're not we're the more logical long term because we know ain't nobody
coming to save us so we got to have something and this is why i don't begrudge women for
moving the way they do i just think men need to understand women's nature and understand you're
not going to you're not going to change this by argument.
I've started out before high value or anything else.
I started out with talking about show your work.
You can say whatever you want to, but when you actually start making the changes in yourself, showing the accomplishments.
You can go back on my YouTube channel and see the progression, the evolution.
I did.
Congratulations, by the way.
Thank you.
So it's hard to argue
against work work work people like you're always working man you're always working you're always
doing this i'm like i'm older than you when i'm out working you and our women are no different
than any other group of women in the sense that this they want to believe in their men they're
just afraid to so this is where I hold men,
black men responsible.
I would agree with that.
Yeah.
Since D.W. Griffith's Birth of a Nation in 1915,
the black male image
has been under assault.
There is one thing
that does not exist
and it needs to exist.
Black male media
by black men
for black men.
Shout out to O'Shea Duke Jackson.
He runs a website
called the Negro Manosphere.
And over there
is a collective of black
men who are
always talking about
things that are important
to us. We need black
male media run by us, not us
at CBS, NBC, NBC.
We need our stuff for our
voice, our point of view, funded by us.
Our money. So when people
say, you know, you're making money off black women,
I make men support my show.
Men support my show.
Men.
The overwhelming support of my show comes by men.
Because if I'm saying thank you for sticking up,
even if you're a white collar, high value, so-and-so, whatever, brother,
you call yourself on your way to, because you stick up for the men who are blue collar, the factory worker, the military guy.
You say something and you don't look down on us.
I'm like, I've come from that.
What are you talking about?
I still am that shit.
Do you still work in the corporate world?
Pardon the interruption.
No, I do this.
Okay.
And that was my next question.
I'm glad you asked. I was wondering if your stance on the male-female dynamic
would have any impact on you being able to hold
kind of corporate gigs, if you were still into that.
But if you're not doing it, then I guess the question's mute.
Yeah, of course.
I couldn't do it.
I could be canceled, because all I would have to do
is call my job and he would say, would you?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Check out this video.
But the funny thing is, anybody who knows me would tell you,
I've been this way since the 80s.
Me too.
They'll tell you.
Which are you having more fun in?
Corporate shit that the shit you was on?
I don't know.
I don't come from that.
Or this content creation shit?
This by far because I can control it.
You know, having, when I worked in corporate America, I was in sales and everybody ate off
what I did. So if I go close the deal, my manager ate, the sales reps ate, the engineers and
everybody else ate. Now, if you build your own business, your own audience, you can start to
employ and have people eat like,
have people eat off you the way you want to.
When I was in corporate America, I had my first management job here in New York City.
Hand to God.
I was number two rep in the country, and I came up to take over the second worst team in the nation.
I hired a team of people.
First person I hired was a black woman.
The next six people I hired were black men and then one white guy.
Oh, actually, yeah, one white guy.
His mother was black.
I'm not black.
White.
And it's funny.
Now, everybody in the organization
knew my pedigree,
knew I closed some of the biggest deals
in company history,
knew the CEO and blah, blah, blah.
I was the golden boy, per se.
I came up here in New York, and we're at Smith & Wollensky,
and I remember the uncomfortable way they was about to ask this question.
I just knew they were going to ask.
They're like, hey, Kevin.
Uh-huh.
I just got a question for you.
Notice you hired all African Americans.
Why is that? I'm like, probably the same reason you hired all African Americans. Why is that?
I'm like,
probably the same reason
you hired all white people.
I went back to eat my steak
and they couldn't see
a damn thing
because I was kicking their ass.
I beat them at every turn.
I beat them in the company.
And I took my team
and I said,
all right,
I've become successful.
I'm going to make sure
you have the tools
and resources, but you're going to work harder than you ever have worked before because, damn it, that's what's expected.
But if you do these things and we actually got out there and got it done, professional and performed, blew them away.
So and I asked and I went to my regional vice president.
I was like, I think it's interesting.
I was asked why I hired all black people.
But, you know, I put it back to a story I told in college when I had a South African.
This was right after apartheid.
I had a South African chemistry instructor.
And he said, Kevin, in chemistry recitation, 400 plus people.
He's like, why do all the black students tend to sit together?
They all tend to sit right there.
I've noticed every time we all tend to sit together, I was like, I was like the same reason all the white students sit together.
But I think it's funny that your eye automatically goes to that little group of five or seven black people instead of this hundreds of white folks.
He just sat there
looking dumbfounded.
I was like,
why is this important?
Because when I was in management,
I didn't walk around
talking about my views
on this or that.
I just had a shot
and I hired the best people
I could find for the job
and they just happened to be black.
Can't we do that?
Just like if you,
the whole notion of
why is this view
or things that I'm saying,
they're not wrong.
And if we operated more
in a way to where
men were leading,
effective, productive,
competitive, successful men,
men that respect
to one another,
got out here and other groups of men had
to say, those guys are somebody to be contended with. You're not going to go drop a business in
our neighborhood. No, no. We're going to drop the business in our neighborhood. We're going to have
the bank in our neighborhood. We're going to have the dry cleaner. We're going to have everything
in here. And if you want to come over here, profit from what we're profiting from, you got to go
through our power structure we're going to talk
about circulating our dollar and that kind of thing then it will be a hell of a lot easier for
women to sit back and say i don't like what they're saying even how you say it that's true
but this air conditioning shit should feel good that's true uh i like i like i like this streets
are clean and it's safe and my kid you know we're the only people that don't have it
but coming from corporate are you are you shocked at just how fast this content creation game moves
and the success and like we were talking off mic and you're saying you're out eating and people
are recognizing you and i mean coming from a world, I understand how it could be a lot for somebody.
Well, I come from the sales side and then the advertising and marketing side.
I understood the importance of image and how image really plays.
So am I shocked? No, because I studied it a lot before I even got into it.
before I even got into it.
Like many people on YouTube,
I came here understanding the platform,
the algorithm,
why Google bought YouTube and why Facebook bought Instagram
and all those different things going behind it.
Ultimately, I hope to become platform agnostic.
I just want to own my own content
and whatever platform is hot, just drop it there.
This is why podcasting and all this is so valuable.
Because if they decide they want to turn the lights off one day,
you just go to the next platform.
Keeping the platforms competing is like keeping the labels competing.
Ownership.
And see, I think, you know, while a lot of men champion stuff that I'm saying,
I'm like, understand something.
Go back to my old content.
I don't want to hear shit from you
talking about you being broke.
If you're not working 60 hours minimum a week
that you're getting paid for,
turn off YouTube, Instagram, whatever,
and get your ass out there.
Go down there and work at McDonald's,
Circle K, get you a job.
I don't care about your pride.
You can't be proud and broke at the same time.
Go work, work and work and work, Okay, get you a job. I don't care about your pride. You can't be proud and broke at the same time.
Go work.
Work and work and work.
And then you take that money you make from your part-time job,
invest some of it.
Invest most and take half of it.
Invest it to your future.
The other 50%, the other percentage, take some, have some fun,
go buy your belt.
Then invest it in self-improvement.
Get you a high-income skill.
Get you something that's going to give you high value skills that you can market on, that you can leverage on the
marketplace, whether you're working in corporate America or whether you're going to be doing your
own entrepreneurial thing in the future. But men, if you're working, the harder you work,
the luckier you get, the more exposure you get. And it's about hard work and speed.
Get out.
When I came to New York City,
it was one of the best moves I ever made
because this city moves fast.
Super fast.
And that's good
because if you can run fast, great.
But if there's something wrong in your stride,
you'll fall fast too.
Good.
Fix what's wrong and run quicker.
Because if men
are working to become
the best version of themselves
putting the work in
a self-improvement
this that
working with other men
to help
increase the opportunities
for men
guess what
women come along
guaranteed
if
coronavirus is over
next month
and the happening spot was,
I don't know,
something in Central Park
and everyone in the country
recognized that this group of guys
got this shit together.
We all go sit there.
We could just be sitting at the table,
smoking cigars,
drinking scotch or bourbon
and just talking,
chopping it up.
We would have women surrounded us.
Indeed.
Because they're always going to come
where men are doing something
Sure
Where men are
When there's
Not shooting the shit
But when men are
Getting together
Especially talking about power
I think we've lost that power
I think we've lost that power
What power do you think we lost?
What he just said
I think that
It's literally been
A total shift
Oh today
Yeah
It's been a total shift
In which the power
That you're saying That the women Would flock to It's been a total shift in which the power that you're saying that
the women would flock to,
it's been just the opposite. So we have
the Instagram generation with the
naked women and the sexually
motivating,
I mean sexually attractive chicks
and I think the men are now
gravitating to the women where
it's backwards.
And we've lost the power
yes
indeed
because
everyone's an individual
contributor
that's why
Snoop Dogg
had to apologize
to
Gil
why
because Snoop
is a millionaire
but he out there alone
but if we had
the media apparatus
to say no
you gonna cancel Snoop?
No, no, come on.
No, Snoop is with us.
See, as long as, why am I here?
I had other stuff to do,
but you, this brother has something,
and I got something.
This matters.
That matters.
This matters.
It's a connection.
That's why we tell you.
And the thing is, we have to stop the,
I have a reputation of not beefing.
People can say the most egregious things about me.
I'm trying to get that reputation.
Good luck, bud.
Because the thing is, and I started that off long before anybody ever knew who I was.
But he's 52 too now.
I don't know if he had this reputation at 40.
Yeah.
Well, the thing is, because it ain't about me.
I mean, the thing is, I can't really beef with you if I don't know you.
Most of the people say stuff.
It's about something.
And the thing is, the audience doesn't want to see that.
They want to see we know how that looks.
We need to be able to work together as black men, as men in general.
When men working together, women automatically fall into their place.
But when we flip it and we start acting catty and beefy and this and that, why do we have to respect that?
Why don't women need to respect some?
If you calling me this and that and I'm calling you this and that, we're acting like a bunch of bitches.
Yeah.
Why do we have to respect that? I agree. Versus if you say something about me and I'm calling you this and that we acting like a bunch of bitches yeah I agree
versus if you
say something about me
and I'm just like
keep moving
and you going about
your business
and then you work
with the people
you can work with
and then eventually
you may come back around
and be like
you know what man
you know what
it's a dog
I was wrong
I thought you was
on that bullshit
I couldn't stand
your sweet looking ass
but you know what
you just a different kind of dude but you know what you just different
kind of dude
but I heard
that you did
so that
and guess what
and I'd be like
it's cool man
let's go
I don't be
let's worry about it
let's get this money
but do you think
we get further
if we are able
to work together
with women
and be inclusive
I think that
they're two separate issues
I think that prior to
it's
to go back to Malcolm X, right?
Malcolm X, when asked that question
about working with white people,
his immediate response was, I think that
we need to... Well, first of all, they told him
not to answer that question.
Who? Nation of Islam.
They said, don't you... No, I'm not talking about that question.
I'm not talking about that one. When they asked him
could white people
help the cause, etc.,. Initially, he said no.
He said we have to learn how to regulate ourselves,
women can't really fight for our cause.
See,
you say work with women and I say we need to be able to employ our women,
employ our women,
work with women.
The same thing as far as I'm concerned,
when we have an economy,
if they choose to work
in corporate America
in their own businesses,
but if you also have
a thriving economy
to where they can work in,
guess what?
It's a hell of a lot easier
to have respect for somebody
when you see a man
in the household,
a man running businesses,
a man running
the police department,
fire department,
everything around you.
Like I grew up in a neighborhood where I saw black male teachers. And it's, businesses a man running the police department fire department everything around you like i grew
up in the neighborhood where i saw black male teachers and it's and it's this i think that
i'll i'll find this podcast and i'll put it down at the bottom when boys see men in uh teaching
roles their outcomes improve dramatically because male teachers we don't have those anymore. And that's another part
that we don't have time
to get into.
But when we lost,
we have lost,
there's a book called
The Black Tax
that talks about
the simple loss
of black men as teachers.
The impact a man has,
a boy has of seeing a man.
I grew up in a single parent household,
but everywhere around
the seats of power,
my principal,
my band director, at every level of my life, there were men leading stuff.
So, you know, I put the responsibility and onus for the leadership, all that stuff firmly back on us.
Yeah, we've talked about we're talking about women and all this stuff right now.
But make no mistake, you know, and I have fallen short because I didn't see
this stuff growing up.
Nobody talked about this.
We are building the airplane
while we're flying it
and I will never sit back
and try to hold myself up
as some bastion
of what's right and wrong.
Are you kidding me?
Come on, man.
We've all done
some stupid shit,
some fuck shit.
But the whole point is,
are we trying to leave it
better than we found it?
That's true.
I think,
and I got to run here
in a minute,
but I think Generation X in particular,
we're the first generation that didn't have to go fight a war of any kind.
We didn't have to, you know, my father's generation had Vietnam,
and before them they had Korea, before that they had World War II.
Generation X, we had the ball kicked out of our hand.
We had Reaganomics, we had crack, then we had AIDS and all that other stuff.
We had Reaganomics, we had crack, then we had AIDS and all that other stuff.
Generation X men are going to do is going to be the legacy we leave behind for the other men.
You know, we didn't get to have it the way we wanted.
We didn't get to be the dads in the household that we didn't get a chance.
We wanted that stuff. We didn't get a chance.
But we can choose to say, even though I couldn't have it that way,
can I hand the baton off to the next
group of men
and give them something
to run into
so they don't have to
keep reinventing
this motherfucking wheel
and doing it all over
and over again
and then having to
vie for power
with the women
no no no no
if we're doing
what we're supposed
to be doing
let us build our
power base
work together
build our economies
and then
women have the opportunity to say you know if I want to work work in that structure or I want to go work over on this structure.
More often than not, history has shown women are really good with accepting when they can actually see men do something.
Now, just bump your gums, talk a good game, show your work.
They say that. So they say that.
Listen, man. Round of applause. Round of applause. show your work they say that so they say that listen man
round of applause
round of applause
we need a part two
Kev
what can't be
like I wanted to get
into the civil rights
and what do you think
that effect on us
had
like etc etc
I think
yeah
and I'll be here
in a couple three weeks
and see the thing is
my goal is to have
just a better outcome
better conversation
we got to start talking
to one another
instead of at each other
because we get nowhere
by ourselves
as men
or with our relationship
and one of the
like I said
one of the most impactful
things I've seen
is young men
see me walking by
and be like
and I remember
me and Joe Green
and he threw that t-shirt
at that impact.
Yeah, I remember that.
I kind of got that feeling
with some of these young dudes
and they're like,
man, you be out of this slot.
I don't know,
what the fuck's up with them?
But I see the look
in their eye
and they're saying,
I see something
that I admire and respect
and I'm like,
that's what's up.
No, that is what's up.
Thank you for coming. I appreciate you. I won like, gosh, that's what's up. No, that is what's up. Thank you for coming.
I appreciate you.
I won't tell the guys that you was trying to actually be like two and a half hours early for his flight.
I won't even tell them.
I was like, hey, fam, you can still ride.
You can be 90 minutes early.
Round of applause again.
Thank you, Kev.
Appreciate it.
If you get a minute when you back out here, you're always welcome.
For sure.
You're always welcome, man.
We appreciate you. And I know you got to go. B good is good ice we good we good we're good we're
good franklin we good everybody good we're good all right man listen keep us in your prayers lord
knows we need to be there until the next time i bid you a do peace arriva dirtie adios hasta la
vista so long goodbye remember life is a series of moments and moments pass
So let's make this last as if it's all that we have
And I'm gone, I'll talk to y'all next time
One
This is no ordinary love
No ordinary love
This is no ordinary love This is no ordinary love