The Little Dum Dum Club with Tommy & Karl - 205 - Nick Cody & Karl Woodberry

Episode Date: September 9, 2014

Dog Clubs, Diving Islands and Ghostbusters Pokies.  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hey mates, couple of plugs up the top of the episode for you. First of all, if you are in Perth, we are coming over there Sunday, November the 2nd at Rosie O'Grady's. We are doing a live Little Dum Dum Club recording as well as both of our solo shows from this year's festivals. We're bringing a couple of guests with us and it is going to be heaps of fun. So you can get tickets for that at littledumdumclub.com. We've never been to Perth before to do the show, and we're very, very excited about it. Also, if you're in Melbourne, I have a new show that I've been putting together for the Melbourne Fringe Festival.

It's called Con Air 2, Con Voyage, and it is a live sequel to Con Air. I would love to see as many of you guys there as possible. It's going to be a lot of fun. Tickets for that are on sale now, melbournefringe.com.au, and it starts on September 17. Thanks, mates. Hey, mates. Welcome once again into the little dum-dum club for another week. My name is Tommy Dasolo. Thank you for joining us. Sitting next to me is the other half of the show. Coaching Get a

dickhead. I got an email the other day. We're not going to reference the fact that we just did the dumbest start we've ever done. You stood up. I think it's important that people know that. I got some energy. I want to get some – people can't see this at home, but I'm now jumping up and down, making sure this podcast is as good as it possibly can be.

Sure, your neighbours downstairs are loving this. They're into it. Hey, so I got an email. So, you know, we, of course, we have this website that took us ages to set up, but we've got – No, it didn't take us ages to set up. We had nothing to do with it. We just sat there and waited for someone else to do it.

Well, that's fair. I mean, that three years wasn't three years of us trying to build it from scratch. Yeah, it took us three years to begin to start. We weren't digging a hole in the internet and planting website seeds or any effort at all. Massaging the cyber soil, trying to get it to come in. Yes.

But now this thing happens, and I've sort of talked about this before in relation to another thing but, you know, there's that thing where people will kind of park domains and then they kind of, they try and sell it on. Yes. So because, you know, littledumbdumbclub.com, the actual, that address is registered to my email address. Yes.

I got an email from someone the other day who's got some sweet digital property that they want to sell us. Oh, really? And they wanted to know would we be interested in purchasing littledogclub.com. Now, look, what do you reckon? I mean, I have a dog. You don't have a dog.

No. But, I mean, you know, you might get one in the future. I could use that domain as a pet though. Okay. Yeah. You could just walk it that domain as a pet though. Okay. Yeah. You could just walk it around the block a few times. Yeah. I could just hit refresh on it a few times.

Yeah. But I sort of think, you know, the podcast is going well. You know, we do these live shows. We're getting not a heap of money but a little bit of money in. It'd be time to sort of start throwing some of that around and, you know, treat ourselves to a domain that we really don't need at all. Oh, this is like, is this going to be like Cribs or something where it's just this gaudy...

It's a power move. Yeah, yeah, right. It's a power play to all the other podcasts to go, look at this, we can afford domains for things that we don't even do. And then, you know, if we sort of run out of steam of sort of talking about our lives and whatever else, we can just both get dogs. Yeah. And then we just, the little dog club.

Oh, I like it. How much is the offer? Oh, I should check. I'll double check. I'll have to hit him up and get back to you. But I don't think it's much. We better not put this out tonight. We don't want someone else claiming this URL.

Yeah, that's true. How many people are jumping on littledogclub.com, do you reckon? To be fair, if someone actually did have a little dog club and had the domain, and someone said, oh, would you like little dum-dum club? I think that's the worst offer. Big episode today. Two of our buddies.

First of all, just back from a couple of months in Thailand, our good buddy from the Wisdom Laughter podcast, Carl Woodbury. Yeah. Sucked off a ladyboy. Yeah, good one, guys. Okay, no further questions. All right, I sucked off a lady boy. Yeah, good one guys. No further questions. Save it for Little Dog Club. Yeah, that's a little bit blue for Little Dum Dum Club. Little Dog Club is

where... They would eat that up over there. I forgot where I was. What about Little You Weak Dog Club? That's just where we send people that we don't like that have wronged us in some way. You weak dog. Little weak dog club. Also, just back from overseas, from travelling around America,

good old pal of the show, Nick Cody. He was sponsored by Lonely Planet this week. Also sucked at... Oh, no, sorry, guys, wrong. Now, you got budgies, so – Had, had. Oh, because I also used to have a girlfriend as well. Did she take them in the divorce?

Yeah, there's some budgies. Budgies gone missing. I'm going to have to wait a few months. You can't post our photos of you and somebody else overseas and expect to see your budgies anytime soon. Uh-oh. Shit. I'm just giving it a few months, I reckon,

before you make that call. So the budgies are being held to ransom. Give it a few months. These are budgies. Don't they live like three weeks? Yeah, that's 12 budgies. You're thinking of flies, Carl. Are you allowed to transport?

Because you can take cats and dogs on a plane. Like if you rock up to Qantas with a birdcage and you want to take your budgie to America. Yeah, they just go, mate, they've got wings. They can get there. We'll just put some seed onto the wings and they'll just follow that for 17 hours. A little V formation behind the A380.

But yeah, what's the lowest grade of pet that you can take with you on a plane? Like if you bring like a rat in a little box and go, is this okay? Do I have to put him to sleep in the little special hold? Can you put a butterfly in your pocket and walk onto a plane? I mean what are they doing in quarantine?

Are they checking for butterflies? Like you know like a ride at a fun fair or whatever where it's like you've got to be this tall to ride this attraction. It's like you have to to be this tall to ride this attraction. It's like you have to be this big to be checked into customs on a plane. Yeah. You have to have this many Instagram photos of this pet in order to qualify.

You've got your phone out. Go to littlebutterflyclub.com and just they'll have all the specs in there. Well, that's at the Melbourne Zoo. My dad designed the little butterfly club that's at the zoo. What? Really? My dad designed the butterfly and some That's at the zoo What? Really? My dad designed the butterfly And some of the chimp area

Really? And some of the chimp Yeah I mean not the whole He's in charge of it Yeah He got halfway through And some of the apes went

Fuck this Get a new man on board How do you think he got the I know we eat our own shit But you know Come on This West Wing Do they seek their own shit?

He built a little tool shed for the chimps and then they worked it out and the chimps then built the butterfly. Oh, evolution. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like the start of 2001. He didn't get the name Two Door Desolo for no reason. You've got to keep those butterflies from fucking off.

But it's, you know, when my dad passes away, I'll take a stroll through the butterfly house and the sweet humidity in there. Anytime it's humid, it'll just remind me of my dad. Oh, I'll take a stroll through the butterfly house and the sweet humidity in there. Anytime it's humid, it'll just remind me of my dad. Oh, is it humid with butterflies? Oh, man. When was the last time you guys were in there? Man, it's thick.

Well, now that I know the man who built it, I'll probably get a few freebies from him, put a few plus ones on. It was Saturday night and it was pretty recent. I was down there just having a great time. I think I got the stamp on my arse. So your dad is responsible for the death of millions of butterflies? Pretty much, yeah. Because that's – well, I guess that's pretty true, isn't it?

Why? How did he kill them? Well, because what kind of lifespan do they have? If you're making a big house where it's like housing butterflies – Have you not been to the zoo? Yeah, but you didn't – your dad didn't invent butterfly death, though. How is he responsible? No, but he's putting them all in one place. There's so many dead butterflies.

It's almost like a butterfly Auschwitz when you think about it. Exactly what I was going to say. They're against their will. My dad's one of history's greatest monsters. If you're a butterfly, there should be... I watched Allsops List. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Allsops List. All those butterfly lampshades at his house. My dad and his treatment of butterflies would make a great Farside cartoon Yeah, yeah, yeah. All those butterfly lampshades at his house. Yeah, yeah, yeah. My dad and his treatment of butterflies would make a great far side cartoon where my dad's just there sketching it and then there's like a giant human-sized butterfly going, Silence of the Lambs, where he's just hollowed out a butterfly and wearing it as a suit. Yeah.

This is all great stuff. They should let you drink in the butterfly house. It'd be kind of nice. At the zoo. It's pretty hot. Just be at the zoo. At the zoo. It's pretty hot. Just be at the zoo. Yeah. Thailand.

It's pretty humid. It's like Thailand. Cheap Thailand. Thailand, yeah. So, Carl Woodbury, you've just been back from my favourite place in the world. Yeah, I saw your photo next to the king everywhere I went. That was pretty good. You're arrested next time we go back.

Good work making fun of him. Let's pull back on that. Love the king. By the way, I love Woodbury. I heard about his travels. He went over and he was doing

some relaxation retreat stuff. It's great that we're hearing it from you instead of him. Finally, he was here to tell you. I'll see you later, guys. Nick's got this. If only he weren't dead

like so many butterflies. He didn't even understand how odd it was he went to do some relaxation retreats and my Thai classes yeah namaste and then just a hundred head kicks on a bag yeah very relaxing there was a medium in Thailand if only they'd invented a happy medium man yeah I've got a lot of problems did you do like a comedy Did you do a gig over there Yeah weirdly I did a gig I got there and I was like A friend of mine was playing music on the island of Kotow

It's like a small island Sort of probably 50 kilometres Out to sea more than Copenhagen where they have the full moon parties All that kind of stuff It's a lot more tropical than the other islands It's really little, known for it's diving lot more tropical than the other islands it's really little known for its diving and my friend was playing gigs

around there for five weeks and so sort of you know made local friends and everything and it just so happened you see why I told his Thailand stories

mate it's fucking building alright it's building it's known for its snorkeling shut up mate just fucking Cody just because

all of your stories are I had a beer then I'd done a shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sorry about that, mate. Just because he can't knock it over in half a sentence. Excuse me, I'd done shits, plural. 75 shits.

Anyway, thanks for interrupting my great story. Back to Sir Carl Attenborough. Right. Fuck. Yeah, and Phil Nicol? Yeah. Phil Nicol Yeah Phil Nicol UK comedian

UK comedian from Canada He just happened to be On the island And there was a venue there And he was like I met him at the The raw juice place Which Nick I'm sure

You went to plenty of times When you were in Thailand Yeah It's Bintang I'm sure It's not even a beer from there Yeah One for one cunt Oh he's returned me serve.

He didn't get it in, but he returned it. This is fun, isn't it? This is a good thing. Yeah, and I did this weird gig in an outdoor sort of thing with Phil Nichol. It was pretty good. Oh, it was outdoor? Yeah, pretty much. It was like all the crowd were outdoor

and we were sort of under this little bamboo thing. Was it locals listening or was it tourists? No, it's like mostly because it's, like I said before, I was interrupted by Nick, it's a great dive island. Known for its scuba diving. You should have done the gig underwater. It's such a dive island. It doesn't sound like much of a dive island at all.

Yeah, so Sebastian and Ariel were there and they were loving it. How many people were there watching the gig? About 60. How many baht are we paying to get in? How much baht? 500 baht to get in. No, that's a lie actually.

150. I got paid 500500 to do it. Oh, pretty good. We've all got stuff going on. Yeah, mate. This is crazy. So, yeah. Do you have to declare that on the way out of the hotel?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sorry, guys, I've got all this cash. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's still up my ass now. What's just for people listening? I've just got a lazy $500. Hang on, just for the listeners. Chill out.

You don't have to Open xe.com Currency converter I'm about to resolve this What's 500 baht? 15 dollars Oh yeah That's alright Now was that in a check

Or just a suitcase Full of fucking Sick cash I'm glad I said that Was that what they had In Pulp Fiction Was that the suitcase With gold

Marcellus Wallace's soul Yeah that was 500 baht In there Yeah yeah Did the promoter Give you the old Golden handshake Where he just had The 500 baht just rolled up in the palm?

Yeah, yeah. So I had the briefcase with the... The handcuff on the briefcase. Yeah, the handcuff on the briefcase. You had to synchronise keys to open it. I'm glad you got time halfway through describing a handcuff. It's probably the only bloke here that's been arrested. Am I?

Someone asked me that today and I was like, been arrested. Am I? Someone asked me that today and I was like, no, no, I haven't been arrested. Have you been arrested? Yeah, a couple of times. Oh, right. I think we talked about it last time. Yeah, we talked about it. It was my dark days. Yeah, sorry, man.

Yeah, thanks. Back to the raw juice. Raw juice and diving. I think I'm officially past the age where like I think there's an age where it's kind of like cool to get arrested and it's kind of like a youthful, you know, messing around, rebellion kind of thing. Like if you're 28 and you get arrested, it's like there's something wrong with you. Like you've either done something properly bad where you're going away

for a long time or it's like, man, you're 28, why are you taking a dump in a fountain at a shopping centre? You didn't get arrested in Thailand though. Fuck no, no, no, no, no. I've done things that definitely could have got me arrested in Thailand. Like what? Like, well... Bad comedy? Yes!

Yeah, did you guys stay up all night writing that together, did you? That's fucking amazing. That's amazing. The collabo right here, fuck you. That's the sort of comedy that buys you littledogclub.com. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 500 baht

if you can get it right now. The hive mind that we've been working for four years to develop now. I forget the question. What was it? Have you been arrested

in Thailand? What did you do that should have got you arrested in Thailand? Well, weirdly, I don't know if it would have got me arrested because the first time

I went there, we were, like the guy that I knew I knew a guy that lived on Copenhagen Is that a good diving? Yeah Is there any water there? Yeah, yeah Out of ten, how's the diving?

Do you have a butterfly house? I'll answer one of those questions individually Answer none of them please Sorry, go on Stuart Diver Yeah Red butter Oh man Answer none of them, please. Sorry, go on, Stuart Diver. Yeah. Fred Barth. Oh, man. That joke was abominable.

Yuck. I didn't even say that word right. I'm a fucking idiot. It got more syllables in it. So, yeah, I knew this guy and he was a bit of a loose guy and his wife was friends with, fuck these stories, it's taken a long time to get into them, but his wife who was Thai,

she was affiliated with a lot of the fishing mafia on Koh Phangan, Koh Samui. Oh, wow. And so her cousins were policemen on Koh Samui. Right. And they'd come over and hang out every now and then and one time they came back and they'd taken all this drugs, ecstasy and speed off forangs, like arrested them,

fake arrested them and took it off them. Off forangs? Foreigners. Foreigners. Foreigners, so white people. And brought it back onto Copenhagen and we were smoking ice with this policeman. Here we go.

And I remember being in a cab and like, you know, the sort of cabs, it's just like the back of a thing like that. And I forgot that I had ice and fucking pills in my pocket. And the next morning I heard that the cops on the island were pulling over random foreigners and checking them for like drugs and everything like that and some of the cab drivers actually plant shit on you. Like they'll pull over on the side of the road in the middle of, you know, the jungle or whatever or on the way to where you're going

and they'll put your hands behind your back and they'll pick up some weed out of their own pockets and go, give us fucking 2,000 baht or we'll take you to the cop shop. Oh. Like that. So the next morning I wake up and heard all this stuff. I'm like, oh, shit, man. That could have been fucking hairy.

Doing this podcast from Bangkok Hilton. That's I – when I went to Bali a couple of years ago, I booked in to go quad biking sort of like up in the hills. Yeah. And it's one of those things where they say, hey, I'll come and pick you up at this time. And he goes around to all the hotels and sort of gets... ...you know there'll be like a big group of people going...

...and it's a little mini bus and he takes you all up there. And he comes and picks me up. I'm the only one from my hotel going. And we just drive past all these other hotels... ...and no one else gets on. And so suddenly I'm just turned into that awful... ...overly suspicious Westerner where I go, well, I'm dead.

I've gotten on the scam bus has turned up a little bit before the real bus or I've booked in on a scam or whatever it is. And I just, I've never been that panicked in my whole life because we got, you know, when we're sort of in the town and the bit that I recognised, I went, well, look, I can make a call. I can just slide the door and run. I should just run. And I did nothing.

And then we get further and further and further and it's like, well, even if I wanted to run now, I'm fucked. I don't know where I am. And we're going deeper and deeper into the bush. And I genuinely was thinking, this is it. I'm going to get like a'm going to like get a, like a bullet in the head or whatever, like honestly. And then we, yes, I'm dead now.

Thanks for listening to the little dog club. The little dead dog club. And then at the last minute we stopped at this resort and picked up this couple and then it was all fine. But it was like that, I was so jittery that it was actually, I don't know if I hadn't been on my way to do quad biking, I don't know how I would have alleviated that tension because it was like so I'm just on this bike,

just gunning it down a track going, like just letting out all that built up like tension and stress. Like I would have had to have, like if I'd just been going like back to the hotel and I thought that was happening. Going to the hotel going, have you got any dodgums? I would just have a billion wanks to get rid of the tension or something. That is the only way I would have been able to get rid of that. Has anyone been to that in time?

We've all been there to that. There's a go-kart slash shooting range just outside of Phuket where I went go-karting. I saw it on the way out, yeah. Yeah, and then you go shooting and I'd never shot a gun before and then I said, oh, I want to shoot this pistol and they go, great. At a go-kart? Yeah, at a go-kart.

Mario Kart. Yeah, really fucked up Mario Kart. Shoot that little guy screaming over there. Shut him up. Here we go. It's called the JFK experience. We've got a model book depository for you to see. They just gave me a gun and I'm like, oh, yeah, cool.

So where are the, do you get the rounds? And they're like, oh, it's in there. I'm just standing with a gun going, fucking hell. And they're like, oh, so have you had any drinks? And I was like, oh, I had a beer before. And they're like, oh, right. Just aim that way. Fucking, I just did not give a shit. And they're like, oh, right. Just aim that way. Fucking.

I just did not give a shit. I've never been so scared of guns. It just freaked me out about guns for ages. Yeah. Well, last week's episode I did start to talk about my last little episode of Thailand Talk. Thailand Talk. A few little – it should be a segment on this show. Yes, and I put a disclaimer at the start of the episode about the rest of the content,

but I realised I very irresponsibly forgot to include in that disclaimer that there was going to be promise of a Thailand story that would never be fulfilled upon. Yes. So I am sorry to the audience that were on top of everything else just going, when's the sweet relief

of the story on the beach coming along? But, yeah, the last couple of things that happened in Thailand I was going to say was my favourite shop, when I was over there, I went past a shop that was called My Son, the Music Shop. I quite like that.

So it's a guy who's, what, he's given birth? He's barren. And he's had to make up for it by just buying a music shop and adopting it. Oh, okay. I like that. His balls don't work.

It was an African music shop. You've walked past JB and thought if only that was my own. I love JB a lot. I know. And I have actually. Like I walk in there and every time if I've been in one the day before and I walk past one, I'll still go in and be in

there for half an hour. JB. This is the thing. I buy everything digitally now. I'm not even in the market for anything in there. It's just wonderful to walk around. There's something about the little text of writing on the DVDs. Yeah, good one Barry. That's fucking great. These guys care.

The little signs that they make. I saw one the other day that was they had a couple of Daft Punk albums on special and they draw their own little recommendations and they'll do a really bad picture of Sonic the Hedgehog or whoever. They'd done a fucked drawing of the Daft Punk robots and it was like get ready for seeing them live by getting these Daft punk cds and it's like like that that was like seven years ago how good's around the world guys is that just is that just a thing that they had for when that album

for when that tour was happening and then this new albums come out and they're like well i mean rodney did the greatest Daft Punk story of all time. No one's going to top that. We'll just – no one will care. We've got that in the archives. Yeah. No, I'm with you. I always had that as a newsagent as a kid.

I just wanted to live in a newsagent. Absolutely the same. Yeah. I loved it. As a kid I was like, if one one day If I did all my study good If I could work in a newsagent That would be sweet Going in and seeing

A crisp batch of Mad magazines on the shelf And you know that They've just come in today Because the rack is Literally bursting Oh heaven I was

I was a serial stalker Of the newsagent I would go in there Every day Every day It was a great I'll share with you Two of my great Meribar newsagents Exper I would go in there every day. Every day. There was a great... I'll share with you two of my great Marabara newsagents' experiences.

Only two? I didn't find it this far for this. Nick's staring at us blankly like you can't connect. It's like, imagine you go into the pet shop and they've got a new range of budgies in. The yellow spotted flatbill. Finally, they've got him in.

Carl, can you done a shit in a news agency? I would like it. I'll get Woodbury back on board. I was in there reading Casper, smoking some ice. With a cup. I'm listening, go on. I'm underwater, the magazine's waterproof. Sorry, I was too busy thinking about killing myself.

We've got one thing out of this podcast. If anything will make you want to, it'll be this story by the sounds of it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's it. Hey Nick, how good was actually liking good shit when we were kids, eh? Go on, Carl. I was a kid in there and there was this really old woman that used to run it and she was really old and really mean and she hated people being in her newsagent. She went

past, we were like looking through comics and she came past and went, excuse me boys, those books aren't for reading, you know. Like like that's absolutely what they're for we're eight and we can tell you we can teach you something today old woman that's what you're here for and after that you still thought if i was really good at school i'd be smart enough i can well i'm better than her i'm in since she dies i can And there was one There was one more There was one bit where There was this girl

That worked in there That I had a bit of a You know like Is this story number So this is story number two Story number one's concluded That was that epic Yep

Okay All done Here we go The two towers The second one's coming down Just wait one minute There was a girl in there That I had like

Not even teenage I think like a child crush on Where you're still figuring out how things work. Bart Simpson and his babysitter. Exactly. A bit older. Exactly. So there was a girl in there that worked in there. And it was sort of almost a bit dashed one day when I'm sitting there

and the comic books were right next to the adult, were right near the adult magazines. They were just directly behind it and they were up on the top shelf, the old school top shelf. I don't think people even do that anymore, put pornos on the top shelf, do they? Covered in plastic. Yeah.

Evolution, we're all getting taller. There's no point. Yeah, you whack them on the roof, guys. Come on. Put them up the chimney. Back when you grew up when you were all just a bunch of fucking gimps running around that can't reach. Everyone was four foot.

Yeah. Like in England. You know in England when you go there and a bunch of fucking gimps running around that can't reach. Everyone was four foot. Like in England, you know in England when you go there and all the doorways are like four foot tall? You go, fucking hell. No, I don't know that. We'll go to England. What's the deal with that? That's a thing. Is that your topical that you've got lined up when you go to do gigs in London?

What's with your bloody low doorways here, guys? You bang your head. It's like the newsagents back home. Oh, no, you've lost us. So all the pornos were on the top shelf and this girl that worked at the newsagents

was like guiding this customer through. Like, she must have said at the counter, so where are all the pornos? And she's gone, well, just follow me. Yes.

And she's guided her through this section and I'm standing there and she points up at one of them and goes, this one's a good one. It's got a lot of guys with really big penises in it. Like that? This is a good one. I was like, well, I reckon they've all got them probably.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. They've got really big penises in this one. So this was a male customer? No, no, no, no. This is a female customer. A female customer, okay. So No, no, no. Okay. So I've obviously... Something about that has done something to me because I'm about eight.

So 30 years later, I've still got that in my head. You're just in a constant quest to find that porno with those big penises in it. I'm in a constant quest to be one of those guys in the magazine for my crush to point at me one day. That's why you got good at Photoshop. So you can just put your head on one of those bodies and send it back. I'll have a top shelf dick.

You wait. You wait. One day little kids won't be able to reach me. Oh, my God. Yes. How do you start? Oh, yeah, your favourite shop. Back to Thailand shop Back to Thailand

Back to Thailand Oh man Yeah Because as I've said before In the previous episodes Mum and dad were over there And dad goes Like I would not

Spend my day With my mum and dad I would see them For breakfast And then I'd see them For dinner And I wouldn't Really see them

Yeah because you're cool Yeah Your parents are really uncool Yeah I didn't want to be seen In front of the locals Thinking that was mum and dad Oh them. Yeah, because you're cool. Yeah, your parents are really uncool. I didn't want to be seen in front of the locals hanging out with mum and dad. Oh my god.

You know, when you're kidding you get them to drop you off a block from school so you can just be the cool dude that walks to school. What if the king

sees us? What if Phil Nicol and Carl Woodbury see me hanging out with my mum? I won't be able to get a gig and get my sweet 500 bucks.

We're too busy enjoying the snorkelling, Carl. Hey, Costa Mu is not a diving island. So I said to my dad one day, oh, what did you get up to today? And he goes, oh, you know what I bloody saw today? I saw a bunch of those bloody Champalians, those Champalians. Like, what are you saying? You know, champalions Are you trying to say chameleon?

He saw some chameleons Obviously he'd never seen them But he'd also never said it out loud before Because he's never left Maryborough So when has there ever been cause for him to say the word chameleon out loud? But I like it that he's read it and he's got that in his head and then finally got the chance to bust it out and give it a bit of champalions. I love nothing more than being around people for that.

There was actually a thing on another podcast, This American Life, about this recently, about people getting to that knowledge that you get in your head that's wrong and just if you never have to bring it up, if you never get questioned on it, you can get to 35 and go, oh, yeah, like how that happens and people go, what? And I love it. And since I heard that, I was like, oh, yeah, that is a thing.

And I now, since hearing that, I've ended up in a number of situations where I've heard, well I've been present for a person working it out and it's like watching someone get born. It's just great. It's the best when people do it for like Mexican food is a classic example of it. It's like, no, I love

nachos. What are you talking about? Yeah, guacamole on the top of nachos. Quesadillas. Yeah. I saw I was part of a pretty Yeah, guacamole on the top of nachos. Quesadillas. Yeah. Oh, man. I saw, I was part of a pretty spectacular one the other day. I was with a group of friends. Maybe it was my dad.

You couldn't see him, he was on a tree. Oh, he doesn't know how to pronounce it and he is one. That's even better. You don't call yourself Tommy. Have you never been asked what you are? I was with a group of friends of about six of us and there's one of our friends who's sort of been away for a bit and he's just kind of recently back and so, you know,

it's kind of our first time sort of seeing him in a group for a little while and he goes, we're sort of talking about people's birthdays coming up and age and stuff and he goes, am I still the oldest one in this group? And I went and it was just this silence of everyone going, are we seeing a fully grown man who's about to have to have the passage of time explained to him? It was one of the most sensational things I've ever been a part of. I did a thing at my old work.

When I worked at the AFL, I, as a joke, there was a girl at work there and I printed out a picture of Warwick Capper, I think, like stupid AFL, not stupid AFL. Well, no, I'm going to put that out there. Stupid AFL player. Yes. And I just stuck it on her screen as a joke. So she'd come back and go, oh, that's funny.

You've just put a picture of Warwick Capper. But it just happened that the her screen as a joke. So she'd come back and go, oh, that's funny, you've just put a picture of Warwick. But it just happened that the picture exactly fitted the screen. And so I just stuck it there and I watched her come back and look at it and go, oh. And then get her mouse and just toggle it.

Like, get rid of it. And then that didn't happen. I'm looking at it and going, wait a minute, she's going to figure it out and she didn't figure it out and she kept toggling it. She kept toggling it and I was like standing minute. She's going to figure it out. And she didn't figure it out. And she kept toggling it. She kept toggling it. And I was like standing there

literally, I wish I had a tape of me because I was going, no, no, no, what? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I made so much, I made so much noise. I was like, it's happening. It's happening. And I'm just pointing and laughing hysterically. But I did it

so much because it was such a great moment that she got even madder and toggled up more to try and get rid of it. And I'm like exploding with pleasure. And then I made such an arsehole of enjoying it so much that I think she put in a complaint against me. Because I had to go and apologise to her. But I'm like, in all fairness, that was amazing.

And fix her desktop background. Carl's giving me shit again. I'm in a new monitor. This is fucked. She should be here. Two requests. Carl, can you get fired? And two, can you bring in the IT guy?

If I were to complain about the high quality resolution of that printer, because if it's able to match a monitor, I mean, that is some good. Yeah, it's good. How do you not see mean, that is some good... I just might be... How do you not see that the light is... Oh, yeah, I don't know. Now, that happens occasionally when you're going through... I'll be going through photos on my phone and I've taken a screen cap or something

and I go, what the fuck's the time? And I go to click on an icon and then the picture like, do you want to go back? Is popping up and I'm like, oh, my phone's fucked. It's 2.18am the sun's out it's the end it's the end burn it all

just start fucking trying to kiss girls around you on the tram you're in the interception yeah yeah yeah yeah the spinny top fell over fucking run

wow that is you've been to the Americas lately so out of the two travellers so you were in the Americas for how long quite a while six weeks yeah five or six weeks

the Americas was this in 1742 you went killed a bunch of Indians and it was a great time some syphilis yeah syphilis blankets I put it on the blankets

syphilis blankets what you've got on the blankets. Syphilis blankets. What, did you discover some new budgies while you were at a party? Yeah. You've got none now. Have you ever thought about... Part of me in chief on the background going, ah! When Nick's in the toilet, you need to print out a photo of a budgie and stick it on a Nick's phone and he'll go, he's back! He's back!

Stick it on his glasses. Have you thought about just smuggling the budgies back? Oh, yes. Okay, is this on? That's good, actually. Unfortunately, yes. That's a joke on me. Yeah.

I'm having a good time. Yeah, speaking of Mexican before, so you were in LA, you would have got the best, the very best food of all time, Mexican in LA. Taco truck food. Oh, man. Yeah, it was fucking good times. Did you go back and visit? The food of all time. Mexican in LA. Taco truck food. Oh, man. Yeah, it was fucking good times.

Did you go back and visit? Did you check up on the official hotel of the Little Dumb Dumb Club? Oh, yeah. The Saharan Motor Hotel. When we're staying in LA, we choose to stay at the Saharan Motor Lodge or whatever it was called. There's still a pool you can jump into late at night if you want. Oh, yeah. That's one of my favourite episodes. You can't into Late at night if you want Oh yeah That's one of my favourite episodes Yeah

You can't really jump into it If you want It's amazing with Airbnb and everything That that Like it was packed Sahara Motor Inn was packed Good location

And around the corner For like $80 I'm staying in like A penthouse apartment Oh really Thanks to Airbnb Oh yeah Sahara Motor Inn

You check the prices Like $350 You know what It could keep putting It's prices up and Airbnb can get more competitive. I'll still keep going back. To be fair though, I was in this penthouse apartment going, none of species were shot here. Exactly.

Because I was there at the start of the year. Has Natasha Hensridge been in this penthouse? Yeah. I have no evidence. Because I was there at the start of the year And I stayed there just for a night And Saharan Motor? Yeah I stayed there for one night Because friend of the show

Brendan Walsh was out of town And so he said I could stay at his place But there was like one night before he left And I was like you know what I'm doing this out of So I stayed there for a night and I was wanting to film An episode of my little web series Where I eat food with people Littledogfood.com Littledogclub.com there for a night and I was wanting to film an episode of my little web series where I eat food with people and I thought, you know what

would be great? LittleDogFood.com LittleDogClub.com No, it's called Cheap Lunch, CheapLunch.tv if anyone wants to check it out. But I thought you know what would be great? What emails have you got off the back of owning CheapLunch.tv? None, surprisingly. Do you want ExpensiveDinner.net?

Yeah. FuckOffTappppers.org. That's actually a good idea. I should do expensive dinner and it's like the subscriber only version of that. It's like pretty much the same content but it's just because of the name you're paying 20 bucks per episode. So anyway, I thought it would be cool to do an episode where I have In-N-Out Burger and then I thought, oh, you know, we should film it at the Saharan, just around the pool.

That would look great. And so I go into the front desk and I go, hey, look, I'm from Australia. I just want to film this thing. I'm staying here. I'll pay you like 50 bucks or something if we can just for like, it'll take half an hour. Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Jesus. Is that Australian or American? How much baht is that? Yeah, how much is that? It's like 1,500, 1,600. If only you guys had been there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But yeah, I just was like, it'll be super quick,

be kind of an ad for the place. And the guy just goes, absolutely not. And I went, fuck, I love this place. Just that made me love it more. Like a good, I'm paying to stay there. I'm offering to throw in a bit more. You'll be on the net. I had the sight of all the other ones I've done.

I'm like, yeah, I've got the accent. And he still just wanted nothing to do with it. I love the idea that he's like, yeah, after Species 2. That just, fuck this place. And Natasha Henshread wiped her ass on the curtains. I'm like, I'm not dealing with this again. Maybe they bagged him out in the commentary of that movie and he was like, fucking never again.

Yeah, we had to sneak in late at night to shoot the scenes because this cunt wouldn't let us shoot. Yeah, yeah. We were late at night too. That's why they write on to us. When we tried to jump in the pool late at night, they were like, oh, Natasha Henshread. He wasn't yelling at me

He was yelling at you guys From the camera phone out Yeah, for anyone who hasn't heard it We were all there a couple of years ago now And you, after our We did a live episode down the street And you got We all got very drunk

And you scaled the fence of the pool and jumped in And we've got video of the manager of the Saharan Coming at and cracking the shit Yeah, me trying to jump the fence really quickly and smoothly. Yeah, and you slip and you fall straight onto concrete. And then we were in bed and we were trying to really wind you up. And we're in a really dodgy part of LA. So every three seconds you're hearing a police siren

and you're non-stop going, oh, are they coming to kick us out? It's like, I reckon they've got bigger fish to fry than someone who went for a little swim when he shouldn't have. Sunset Boulevard at 3am. They're going to let you slide coach. We've got a photo fit of this guy's grazed knee. We're just checking everyone in the area. I remember groaning

in bed going my leg's bleeding and you guys just laughing. The worst crime to happen in Hollywood ever. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's a great moment of you frantically trying to get back over the fence and you're just here, you go, you're handing all your clothes back over to me going, take me shoes, cunt.

And then you just slip on the railing and eat shit. Oh, it's a glorious thing. So you were staying in a penthouse? No, just little shit. You can just stay wherever you want with Airbnb. Yeah. Just pick places. I've never been to an Airbnb. No, just little shit. You can just stay wherever you want with Airbnb. Just pick places. I've never been to an Airbnb.

Man, they're the fucking greatest. It's not a hotel. It's not. But you can get some sweet joints. Yeah. Yeah, fucking wicked places. It was all Airbnb and Uber. That's all I was doing over there.

Right. People giving me rides. People giving me their houses. Yeah, Airbnb. I couldn't find anywhere that looked – because the thing with Airbnb, because it links in with like your Facebook. So if someone that you know has – if someone you're friends with on Facebook has stayed at a place, it'll say this person stayed here.

And I, before I went, I found a couple of places that looked great and were good prices and, you know, had all these really good reviews and then it said, hey, this person that you know went there. So I hit them up and I'm like, hey, what about this place? And they went, no way. And that kind of soured me on the whole thing a little bit because it's that thing where once you put it out to your friends. I had all good experiences, man.

Right. I just had this one person who had said that they'd stayed in a place and the woman whose house it was had kids, which isn't in the description of the thing. Okay. And she was really dodgy about she didn't want to give her a key. So she never had her own key to the place. Great.

But then everyone else is like getting on this woman's, you know, review thing for the house and going, had a great time. She was such a great host. It's like how low are your standards for holidaying that you're happy with young kids around screaming and not having your own key to the house? Are you 12? Yeah, yeah. Is that a holiday for you really?

Mum was great. She gave me a dollar for the ice cream van. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She chaperoned me to the movies. So did you do that in New York as well? Yeah, New York, Montreal, New York, LA, Vegas, Portland and Seattle. Did you Airbnb in Vegas? No.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That would be... That would be Mr. Planet Hollywood. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You picked the best hotel too, didn't you? It would be insane to hear someone doing that. I would not talk to someone if they told me they had a Vegas Airbnb. No, I'm sorry to the Airbnb, use the Airbnb.

The place has got like a slot machine in the lounge room, so it's all right. I'm sleeping in the slot machine. It's just weird, it's like a cafe and there's hard rock there. I don't know much, but it sounds pretty groovy. You sleep in the Ghostbusters pokies. It's actually all right. It's like a capsule hotel in Japan. You don't put enough money in it.

I had to tell Chandler the other night the video Greyhound racing machine has been taken out of the MGM Grand, which also means they lost a lot of business from English Geoffrey Cody. It was probably full of money. They had to get rid of it. I was wondering why we didn't get an Instagram photo with us tagged in it of you at the Greyhounds machine. There was none there.

Something's gone wrong here. It has fucking gone. Because you did that. You went to it the last time you were there, I think. Yeah. When I was with my dad. Yeah. Much, much different this time with my new lady who doesn't gamble.

You can fucking have it. If you don't gamble in Vegas, you can spend so much money on cool shit. When I went with my dad, I lost $500 before I got to the room. Joint effort, $500 down the shitter with our suitcases next to us still. Your dad's still there because you gambled away his plane ticket. Yeah, I just said hi to him the other week. He's working at the MGM brand. He was the one that told me, sorry, mate, the grey iron machine's gone.

I was like, oh, fuck. He's not one of those prostitutes who go around the table going, hey, big boy. He's trying to make himself. Oh, this feels wrong having sex with my son. You know what? What? Dad.

You can use that. Well, it's funny you mentioned Vegas because I had a, speaking of gambling and stuff, I, a couple of weeks ago, I went to Friend of the Show Oliver Clark's album launch at Howler in Brunswick. Was there? Great night. I had a fair bit to drink and my girlfriend was ready to go home

and it was one of those nights that if I'd stayed there it was going to get – because there were a lot of comics there and I was like, this is going to turn into a disaster so I'm going to get out while the getting's good. So we're walking down Sydney Road. Look at us getting older. It's great. There's a Keno place there, like one of those sort of little, you know, pokies places.

And I just, for whatever reason, walking past, I thought, you know what I'm going to do? I'm going to go in. I'm going to put five bucks on a pokies and just see how, just for shits and gigs. Because I'm, you I'm just desperately clinging onto the last remnants of the night before I go to bed. So my girlfriend goes in with me and they've got not quite as good

as the one in Vegas but a slightly watered down version of that really cool Ghostbusters one. Oh, really? Not, you know, the one in Vegas has like the speakers in the chair. Yeah, it's got speakers in the chair. That's the best. But, you know, that's banned here. That's why it's not here.

Like the government said you can't. That's too much. Because they're too fun. That's fucking people's not here. Yeah. The government said you can't. That's too much. Because they're too far. That's fucking people up. I get it. I really get it. So this one, it's... That's such an awesome idea where it's like,

no, you're allowed to stick money in there, but you're just not allowed to get surround sound. Yeah, it can't be in 4D, okay? We're banning Dolby from this. Yeah. I get it. All those really crazy ones in Vegas I

oh they work I put money that Ghostbuster machine yeah where they put the Ghostbuster theme into my ears yes so for people that don't

if you don't put enough money and they're like alright then take the money that's it I don't even people might not get it you're sitting in a seat like a big office chair

style thing and the headrest has got yeah three speakers in it and sounds are fucking flying through. It's just great time. And the screen's huge and it's like there's sort of a 3D effect where there's like two screens kind of on top of each other.

I would sit in that seat without the poker machine element if I just had to put money in to keep hearing the goosebumps. That's what I was about to say. Come back, Slimer. When I'm doing those ones in Vegas, I'm not even trying to win money. I'm just putting money in to keep it going. Like a really shit version of iTunes where everything just gives you one go of the song. But I totally get it because this one that I played, it's like 30% of that.

Was it Ghostbusters? It was Ghostbusters, but no speakers and chairs. Was it just people busters? Just MIDI sound? Yeah, yeah, yeah. The fucking mono over there in the corner. I was at the Angelfire Casino. They're not even asking who you're going to call.

They've already called the person. They've taken all the fun out of it. So I put five bucks in and after a couple of rounds I get a pretty good win and I go up. What's a good win? Well, I'm on nine bucks now. You got the feature? Nine bucks.

You hit the feature? And I just wanted to go in and just do something small and silly. Oh, and I should also mention those places when you go in, you know, you've got to sign in. They're all so weird. Yeah, isn't that weird? You've got to sign in to claim jackpots and if there's a fire. Yeah, and also they make you put your hat on backwards if you've got a hat on because, like, if you're –

Because Fred Durst runs his party. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And will Sir be doing it all for the nookie this evening? No, when you sign in, there's just a box. Are you doing this for the nookie? Yes or no? That'll do. But it is that weird thing where it's that presumption of guilt of like,

look, the odds that you'll glass someone in here and we're going to have to track you down are pretty high. It's higher than you not doing it. So just put that. We want you to look as cool as possible when you're glassing that old lady. So I'm sitting there with a backwards cap on, playing the Ghostbusters. Fat stacks in the Ghostbusters machine.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I win nine bucks and I go, I'm out. And so I hit the cash out button. My nine bucks comes out in dollar coins. Yeah. This is going to buy me half a new Korn album, so let's get this money. Yeah, yeah.

Life is peachy, guys. So I'm kind of clutching this fistful of gold coins and I'm drunk and I'm just so into it. I just wanted to do something a little bit just ridiculous on the way home. And so as I'm walking out, I'm holding the fistful of coins in one hand. With the other hand, I'm swivelling my hat around the right way and there's like three kind of guys on reception as I walk out. I go, cop this, boys.

Got nine of your big ones right here. And they, as I'm walking out, they just light up and go insane. They start screaming at me going, go on then, get out of here, you fucking cunt. Oh, really? They start going absolutely bananas at me. I'm just going and it's like I haven't cleared the automatic door yet and I'm like going, am I going to get my head kicked in over a profit of $4? In a pokey joint. Yeah. It means that I've gotten my five head kicked in over a profit of $4? In a pokey joint.

Yeah. That means that I've gotten my five bucks back in dollar coins. My five buck note back in dollar coins. So it's more of an inconvenience to have gotten the four bucks. I've got so much cash I'll wear the hat however the fuck I want. Now I lost $140 on a 3D surround sound experience in Vegas. A Cirque du Soleil ticket. Oh.

Oh. I went and saw the Beatles one. Oh, good. Man, it's fucking insane. I didn't know what to look for. My new lady, she's an actress, director. She fucking loves musical theatre and all that stuff. I saw her in an ad the other day.

Is she in an ad? Yeah. Yeah, I saw her in an ad. It's an ad for like rental insurance. Yes, that's what I saw her on. Cody's banging Rhonda. Yeah. Yeah. How's C ad for like rental insurance. Yes, that's what I saw on. Cody's banging Rhonda. Yeah. How's Catoot feel about this?

Yeah. Not happy, Jan. There will never be a GST. Cody, fuck, tuck it back. Yeah, down, down, I'm going down. G or, G, G or. It's not the da. And then your head went that way and your legs went that way.

Let's all munch on some muncheros. Oh, what's another ad? That was the only ad. And she was excited. I went, fuck, I'm going to go along and watch this. I'd never been to a Cirque du Soleil show before. I now understand. I understand.

It's like if I try to explain Gridiron to her. Because I was like, why is that person running there? I didn't know what to look at. There were just too many fucking awesome things happening at the same time. Like, do I watch the guys on Fire Dawn Backflips Is he a goodie or a baddie? It was just too much Like it was great but I just didn't know what to look at

Because we went a few years ago And when I say we People fairly enough would maybe presume You and your girlfriend No no I mean me and Carl Those in the round things I do kind of agree with you When it starts out very slow

And then all of a sudden A big curtain drops And there is just There's shit everywhere And you're going What's the main bit? I don't want to be looking at the guy Just kind of rolling on the ground

And Carl nudged me and go Did you just see the guy Put his head up his own arsehole? It's entertainment tapas You're going to get 26 courses Can't do it on a backflip guy put his head up his own arsehole. It's entertainment tapas. You're going to get 26 courses, can't do it on a backflip, a kid on fire.

We probably talked about this at the time, but I remember we went there and we got hammered. They had these big frozen cocktail drinks that you could have at the front. I was drinking a glass of Sav Blanc, guys. Like I've never done ever. You are this close to being me. That was Woodbury's last drink.

He had a Sauvblanc and went, oh, no. I don't blame your ex for beheading those budgies. Oh, Jesus. Pretty bird. Pretty bird. I didn't know you used to go out with Isis. I've smoked a lot of Isis. So we got really hammered when you saw it.

And it cost a lot of money to go. What did it cost you, like $140 or something like that? So I had two toilet breaks in an hour. Each time I'm taking a piss, I'm literally going, here's $20 going down the drain by pissing out $20. I've never felt worse About going to the toilet In my whole life

Yeah I just held out I needed to piss so bad But I didn't want to miss anything But then I realised afterwards You don't Like there's no Yeah

I went and saw Inception When it came out in the movies And I had a few beers beforehand And took a piss Maybe 10 minutes in Right And came back For the next two hours

and was like, I don't know what's happening. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Cirque du Soleil could legitimately do a show where you, the audience, all the seats are like a toilet and you can piss where you sit and then that piss gets filtered in and turned into like a fountain as part of the show. Yeah, yeah. They could legitimately pull that off.

They freeze everyone's piss in ice sculptures and then they swing down from the roof and then... Because those shows just keep getting bigger and bigger. That's kind of the only place that they can really take it from now. Yeah. That's the only thing they haven't done. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Incorporate piss into their musical.

I would pay 300 bucks for that. Yeah. I'm not even kidding. I'd pay 300 bucks. I went to Cirque du Soleil. I'd done a shit. And it was a great show. Yeah even kidding, I'd pay 300 bucks. I went to Cirque du Soleil, I'd done a shit. And it was a great show. Love, love me poo?

No, because they're all just really short, elegant names. It'd be like Cirque du Soleil, Bori. And the Y's got like a circumflex on it. There's already a musical called Urinetown. Buy the rights to that one. Whack it over into Cirque du Soleil town. There you go. Bloody perfect.

So where did you stay? MGM Grand Signature. Ooh. Yeah. Which is the suites. So it's the hotel attached to the MGM Grand, but there's no gaming floor. Oh.

Right. You've got to go next door to play. Yeah, but the apartments are fucking insane. Yeah. Because I gambled fuck all, like 30 door to play. Yeah, but the apartments are fucking insane. So because I gambled like $30 or something, I went, I'll just take the cash. I just thought last time I lost $500 in the first 20 minutes. How about this time I get a fucking ace room and just gamble a bit less?

Well, save that story for Little Weak Dog Club. So what did you do if you didn't gamble? What did you do in Vegas? Just fucking drank a lot, went to a few buffets, good times, just eating Unlimited Crab Legs. We were only there for a couple of nights. Right. Yeah.

It's funny you say buffet because, again, to go back to when we were there, I was telling someone about this the other day. Maybe one of the greatest experiences of my whole life was when the three of us were driving from Las Vegas to LA and our thinking was let's get up, let's like get up not too early, sleep in and we'll go get a big buffet breakfast so we're stocked up for the drive and we don't have to stop. And so, you know, we have our breakfast and then we were there

on this kind of turning over point where all of a sudden they've started bringing the lunch stuff out into the same buffet. So good. There's no shutting it down. There's no buffet police kicking us out. All of a sudden I've gone, you know what, I just feel like maybe one more. No one breath testing us for steak pies or anything.

So I'm going up, I'm like, you know what, I just Steak and eggs on your breath sir? Just one more little thing, I might go Sir, I think you've had a little bit too much today. Yeah, maybe I have to just scramble swab on you there. But yeah, going up and thinking, I'll just get like a croissant. Just I want, I'm not quite, just want one more little thing and going up and suddenly there's a fucking lasagna there.

Yeah. And just going, oh my God. Is this a new Cirque du Soleil show? Are we in it? Yes. Oh my God. Why is that French clown crying in the corner? I really hope no one's pissed in this lasagna.

Those three men vomiting so artistically and beautifully in all the directions and all the colours of the rainbow. But I remember we did. We sort of sat there for – because it was just like life rarely gives you moments like this. And so we sort of gave ourselves a half hour to kind of get hungry again and was like, okay, let's sit and let's wait and let's get lunch out of this 11 bucks as well.

I'm putting that on the list. We talked about that a couple of weeks or months ago, the list of like the 12 days of Christmas and having, you know, instead of the partridge in a pear tree, which means nothing to anyone, having 12 days of awesome things. Yes. And that's one of them.

Yeah. Being at a buffet when the change between breakfast and lunch. It's like an eclipse for fat cunts. Don't look directly at the steak. Make sure there's a pikelet in your eye. I was telling someone about it the other night and I was a little bit drunk and I just

I do this especially when I'm drunk. Like you forget where you're at in the story. So your story is just you're saying the same bit again and again and I just, which I do anyway when I tell it because I've never been part of anything as magical as that in my whole life. Just going, oh, like and the person just had to stop me and go, I get it. Food's good. Do you get it?

Is there a start, middle and end to joy? You said it. You had brunch. Can you break down perfection into three acts? This isn't a story, my friend. You had a chicken nugget with your hash brown. Good on you, man. You had a hash brown and you had mashed potato.

But we didn't have to leave. The secret's real. It works. What about you? What about food in, so where you were staying, Koh Tao? Koh Tao and in Pai, which is in the north of Thailand. Pai? Pai, yeah.

That's the name of it. Yeah, it's the name of it. And it's like a... Do a lot of Australian tourists go to that one? To Pai. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Why? Because it's called pie.

Yeah, righto. Good work, no end. Did 4 and 20 own it? Like how? Were you learning improv in Thailand? I don't think so. I didn't risk and allow that enough, did I? Yeah, so it's sort of in the north of Thailand, in the

Burmese border. It's like a weird little hippie town. Oh, yeah, yeah. It's pretty a weird little hippie town. Oh, yeah, yeah. It's pretty good. So my girlfriend's a vegan, right, and I'm sort of vegetarian but I sort of eat fish in that too. So that was like her mecca. There was like probably six vegan restaurants there for her. She's fucking losing her shit with like raw desserts and stuff. What's a raw dessert?

Okay, so raw food. Raw food, yeah, when nothing's cooked. Yeah, nothing's cooked. It's becoming quite popular now. And so a raw dessert is essentially, so you make like a raw vegan cheesecake would be, make a cashew butter, so like mushed up cashews to make like the fake cheese sort of stuff.

Then the bottom would be like a crumble, like a sort of, you know, a cookie crumble thing that's not cooked and then that's just set in the fridge. Right. That kind of shit, right? Yeah. So it's all the levels where, yeah, vegetarian, no meat, vegan, no dairy and then on top of that.

No animal products. No cooking. Yeah. There's a lot of effort into not having fun. Oh, exactly. All in the town of pie where you're reminded every moment that there are better things. Which the Australians love for some reason.

Because, yeah, my girlfriend has been vegan for the last month and so I've sort of cooked a couple of things with her and there's bits where I go, you know, this isn't so bad. I don't know that I could do it full time but it's actually not so bad. But I've been thinking about the raw vegan thing recently and I mean just kill yourself. Like what are you – like I just – you must be one of – like you would have to just be one of those freaks that's just like

food is just for energy and nothing else. That's a thing. Like where are you going? And like when you go on holiday somewhere and a friend will come back and you'll go, how was Rome? And they'll go, oh, man. One of the first things people always say is the food. Like if you travel, what are you doing?

What are your experiences? Yeah, right. It would be such a limited existence, the element of no cooking. I like the idea of travelling and it being a rehab in a way. Like when I go to Thailand or anything, it's always like, all right, I'm eating fresh fish every day. I'm eating all this great food. And then I'm just – it's like turning my life around over there.

I'm going, this is how I'm living from now on. Fresh everything and rice and fish every day. I'm so healthy. And I get back and it's like- Hungry jokes at the airport. Yeah, yeah, exactly. It's just counting down the seconds off the plane before I stick a patty in my mouth. Oh, man.

But how's this one though? I know a girl who is, I forget the name of her, but she only eats, she's a vegan and she only eats shit that's fallen off trees. Oh, what? So it's not like picked or anything. How are you policing that? Yeah. Like are there stores that have a special thing of apples?

Is that like a kosher for idiots? Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's exactlyher for idiots? Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's exactly what it is. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She loves that but she doesn't understand she's protected by people in a society that eat a lot of meat and lift shit. The only reason she gets to do that is because there's other people that lift weights and have pepper spray on them.

You can't live like that in the wild. You'd be fucking dead in a second. I hope those peppers have fallen from the putty tree, all right? Her life, her ongoing life. Raw pepper spray. Is that fair trade? Her existence can only carry on if there's someone up a tree at some stage. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

There was Newton waiting there underneath the apple tree going, fucking come on! But literally, how are you... Come on, Newton, hurry up! How are you... Like, how does one do that? Like, how do you know? You know what?

Are there certain organic stores that have a section? Does all food have to be bruised? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's got to have a little chalk line around it. Do you have to dust it for fingerprints? Wait a minute, someone's plucked this off the store. I think it's, you know what, I think it's a bit more of them just saying that they do that shit than it actually happened.

But you know what it's like, there's a niche for fucking everything. So there's probably like a group or some blog where they, you know, like go, hey guys, come down to fucking the feel of the mulberries are dropping today, you know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. to fucking the field. The mulberries are dropping today. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Come down here. It's really windy and pious today. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

The big storms hit there down the fucking potato farm. They're just chasing hurricanes. Helen Hunt's vegan, isn't she? Yeah, Bill Paxton's there waiting for an avocado to hit him. No, and they're driving. It's not like the cows in the hurricane. Well, we can sort of eat that. It's not even like a truck with all the analysing equipment.

It's like a food truck with a little deep fryer in the back going, we are fucking ready to go as soon as that stuff drops. Just someone licking their finger and sticking it in the air every day. Oh, here we go. Someone's getting dinner. Well, guys, I think that brings us to the end of the little dog club for another week

Nick, Cody, Carl Woodbury thank you very much for joining us namaste Tommy namaste Carl namaste Nick thanks mate thanks to you

not looking at you so you both you guys have got stuff coming up yeah nickcody.com.au all the gigs and shit doing some Sydney Comedy Festival

showcase when's your DVD coming out couple months I edited it this week November, December yeah it'll be before Chrissy NickCody.com.au, all the gigs and shit, doing some Sydney Comedy Festival showcase. When's your DVD coming out? A couple of months. I edited it this week. November, December? Yeah, it'll be before Chrissy. And is this a thing?

Are we, a la what we did with Danny McGinley's DVD that's coming out very soon, are we doing the commentary of it? Yes. Yes! Awesome. Have you got a title? Yeah, Here's Trouble. Oh, okay.

Yeah, it's the name of my show this year But it's not It's the best of Of the last four years I heard it's called Nick Cody Here She Is Is that true? It's called Sovereign Hill There is no gold in it

Nick Cody Cloudy sky No stars Woodbury You got gigs around the place at the moment. You've got your podcast Wisdom Laugh Now. You're probably also selling DVDs of yours in Thailand. Yeah, that's it. If anyone needs Big Mama's House 2, I've got that.

Only if they've fallen off the shelf at JB Hi-Fi. And in Thailand you can get the best version of Big Mama's House 2 on DVD. The ones that stop five minutes in. Oh, sweet burn. Pop that mutt. You've got Mo Mama Mo problems now, buddy. You've let that Big Mama's 2 rip and percolate for a few years. I can't believe I finally got to use that sweet wine.

Like a fine wine. Yeah, Wisdom Laughter, the podcast. It's a weekly podcast I do where I interview a comedian each week and we talk about their crazy drinking stories and talk about feelings. So I definitely want to get you on there, Carl. Oh, feelings. We're talking about feelings. And, yeah, so Wisdom Laughter, the podcast on Facebook,

at Wise Laughter on Twitter, and, yeah, Wisdom Laughter, the podcast on iTunes. Get on on Twitter and yeah Wisdom After the Podcast on iTunes get on there and have a listen guys some of your friends of the show are on there it's a fun little

podcast Cody's got his podcast that you should plug as well for the drive home yeah get amongst it slightly different iTunes and all that shit

less lasers in my one but no gravy ninjas no plenty of those I've got my show coming up for the melbourne fringe festival con air 2 con voyage i thought it was a joke until i got invited to it i mean that's the thing it is it's happening but it is still a joke that it's happened do you know what

i mean like it is still anyway it's so it's on uh september 17th uh just for a few nights tickets are on sale melbournefringe.com.au. We've been rehearsing it a lot and it is going to be wild fun. So come down. It's going to be great. And if you're in Perth, come along on November 2nd and see us do an absolutely live podcast and our solo shows. And our solo shows for a big three-hour show,

the thing that we did in Adelaide a few weeks ago. It's going to be super fun because we're in Tommy Daslow's hometown where he loves everyone. I was conceived in Perth. Yeah, Tommy Town. I think you've changed the name to. I'm looking forward to... Tommy Town WA. I'm looking forward to that happening. I'm looking forward to it being such a good gig that the mayor comes

in and he goes, I mean, I've been left with literally no option here. I have to change the name of this town. Perth. To Tommy Town. And we've got a couple of special guests coming with us, like we did in Adelaide. Because once again, there is no one good enough in your town

for us to put on our podcast, so we'll be bringing our own talent over. And I think people will be very happy with the guests. We've got some great guests coming along. Not like the Adelaide one, just two fat fucks who have nothing else on. This is actually... One of these guests should be too busy

to do this. I'm going to say that. Both of them had sex before. They're both much better than the guests we had. Oh boy, that narrows it down. Alright guys, thanks very much for listening to the little dum dum

club for another legitimately forgot the name of it for a minute saying the little dog club has just become

second nature and we'll see you next time see ya mates woof woof woof woof

woof woof woof