The Little Dum Dum Club with Tommy & Karl - 328 - Lehmo & Scott Dooley

Episode Date: January 17, 2017

Net Worth, Doing It Tough and Good Branding.  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to what's new and interesting in Little Dumb Dumb Clubland. Tommy, we've got an addition to our live show stable. Is this the Zoot review of podcasting? That's what I channeled then. That's what I was literally thinking. Yeah, it had that vibe to it. I liked it a lot. Yeah, this is, well, it's just like that sort of thing. It's like this annoying free content that comes in in the middle of the stuff that you actually want. Yes, this is us like, this is the podcasting equivalent of picking up a bowling ball with a vacuum

cleaner. Is that what you're saying? Yeah. I'm about to take off your shoe. I'm going to cut in half with this knife. We've got a new live show on sale. This is a special thing. This is during the Melbourne Comedy Festival run.

We all know that we are doing four live podcasts during it, plus the drunk cast, obviously. They are all on sale. But like last year, we've added a little bonus show in the middle there. Yeah, so last year you turned 40 in the middle of the Comedy Festival, so we had a little birthday party show for you, which included a roast of Carl Chandler. People loved it.

Yes, it was very popular. We ended up putting a little bit of it out on the Patreon, but mostly it was unrecorded. It was just a, you know, you had to be there moment. It was a really fun late night show as well. Unlike the, you know, the mid-afternoon podcast. So it's got this nice late night feel. It was insane number of people for, what was it like?

It started at like 11pm on a Tuesday or something. Yeah, we did everything we could to make sure people didn't come, but they still came. So stupid. Yeah. So this year we thought, you know what? Let's do. Yeah. So this year, we thought, you know what? Let's do something similar. People love the roast element.

And you know what? You know, that's our bag, isn't it? Like, you play to your strengths. We're good at stuff. We're good at abusing people. We're good at making people feel worse about themselves. I don't think I'm that good at it, so I'm worried about this. But anyway.

All right. Yeah, well, you didn't even turn up to the roast last time. You came unarmed to a duel and just copped it right at the bottom. Well, I didn't know I was going to a duel. I thought it was like turning up unarmed to a duel. You'd assume that that then excludes you from the duel. Right. But the duel's just not going to happen.

Right. As I found out, the duel still happens. Yeah, yeah. You still get smashed. Yeah, yeah. It's still a duel. You just shit it. Yeah, exactly.

So what we're going to do is, what is the date again? It's Friday the- April the 14th. Friday, April the 14th, 11pm, late night show again. It is the official roast of Dilruk Jaya Singer. Yes. Now, that means it's American roast style. That means me and Tommy presumably host it uh presumably yeah

big call yeah well we haven't locked it in yet yeah like i mean my agent hasn't got back to your agent and vice versa well that's the middle of the comedy festival to be honest i wouldn't mind a night off so i might get someone to come in my stead yeah so uh that happens american roast style which means we have a big panel of friends of the show that come in. It's a free-for-all. Everyone, you know, it's not free-for-all. It's structured. We were almost going to just make it like just a roast in general and not have a topic because those things, it's like everyone sort

of goes after everyone else. Yeah. But we sort of figured we may as well keep it on brand with this show. Yes. Basically, having Dil as the subject is mainly just an excuse for a sweet poster that we've cooked up. Yes. And you need a bit of a focus.

So we're going to do that. And Dil will have the right of reply. Like he gets the last say, which is nice for him. Yeah. You know, it's almost like seconds for him. You know, he gets the last thing. That won't be in the show. But it should be.

So, heaves of friends. Are we going to do trial shows for this? Oh, if I could do a roast every day, I would do that for a living. Let's do a dress rehearsal the night before. Yeah. So, if you're in Melbourne, you know, or even if you're thinking about coming to Melbourne, a lot of people decide on when they come to Melbourne to coincide with the drunk cast. Hey, if you can't make the drunk cast or if you want to make all of it, come to this thing as well.

That's a good point, actually. Yeah. So, it's the weekend before the drunk cast or if you want to make all of it come to this thing as well that's a good point actually yeah so it's the weekend before the drunk cast if that doesn't if that weekend doesn't work for you and you're sad about missing out on some bullshit unrecorded thing yeah this is the again this is the rod that we're making for our own backs where each year the drunk cast gets more and more wild and we're worried about how we're going to top it and then last year we had the added stress of doing one of these unrecorded things in the middle of the festival as well. So then the drunk cast has even more to live up to

and we're doing it again. Oh, but last year they were belters. They were both fun, yeah. It was all great. So this will be – look, I think this roast, because it's a new thing, like, you know, last year that was great. This year will be even more focused. I reckon it will be better.

Yeah, last year was almost a bit of an afterthought. Like Tom Ballard kind of spearheaded it because he'd just written a whole bunch of shit-canning jokes about everyone that he knows and wanted an excuse to get out and do them. But this year, a bit more structured, yeah, more lead time. Yeah. Yeah, it's going to be fun. Everyone will be – well, it wasn't specifically a roast, was it? Yeah.

It was like a birthday thing with a bit of roast attached. So some people didn't do any work on it, like you. But some people did a bit of napkin writing and stuff like that. Like you. Well, yes. But I was fucking good at it. So check that out. That's on sale as of, I reckon, today.

And we've got a sweet poster that we may have already put up or will be about to put up today when you're listening to this. So, that date again, Friday, April 14th. Awesome. Just adding that to the stable of all the shows in the Melbourne Comedy Festival, like the four live podcasts, the drunk cast, and

our solo shows. Yes. Which are Carl Chandler, world's greatest comedian in the world. I think it's best, isn't it? Fuck, it is too. Carl Chandler, world's greatest comedian in the world. I think it's best, isn't it? Fuck, it is too. Carl Chandler, world's best comedian in the world. Fuck, I've got to... You know what? I've got to get my poster done because that will lock it into my brain.

I'd say lock it into your brain before you do the poster because you'll put the poster out with the wrong title. Big chance. Carl Chandler, the Book of Mormon. Big chance. Back to back with your show, Tommy. The same venue. Everything's happening at the European Beer Cafe.

It is the official beer cafe of the Little Dum Dum Club. Yes. Nice. My show dinner for two. Speaking of things that are European. Hey, I think I've just worked out the opener for my show. Yeah, actually tickets have been on sale for that for a month now. My solo show is selling very well, which is nice.

Nice change. What are your numbers? 100 per night. Fuck. Yeah. That's great. Good for you. Oh, capacity or sales?

I've sold seven. Right. Okay. Oh, that's up from usual. Good. So that's awesome. Yeah, that's going to be fun. It's going to be cool that it's easy for people To see us both

On the same night And see the podcast On Sundays Yep So that is the news As of The other The other stuff

That you may already know Is that we are coming back For some reason To Adelaide So that's going to be A heap of fun We've just been looking At potential guests

This afternoon And it's looking Man There's a lot of Good people in town During Who are going to say no to us Well no No no They're all going to say yes to us this afternoon and it's looking, man, there's a lot of good people in town. Who are going to say no to us. Well, no, no, no.

They're all going to say yes to us. Saturday, March the 4th. It's a big double episode. So, yeah, two episodes for the one ticket price. And, yeah, heaps of great guests in town at that time. It's at the Rhino Room. It's four in the afternoon and then we'll be sticking around. It's a Saturday night.

We'll be dickheading it up in the streets. Yep. Yep. Going to be awesome. So Adelaide, you'll eventually get there. Why not just bring it forward? Let's hurry up and do it. Yep. Best I reckon, by the look of who's in town on that day, this will be probably maybe even

better than the lines we get for Melbourne. Yeah. There's a lot of great people in town. These will be great. That'll be heaps of fun. But two weeks later, we triumphantly Melbourne. Yeah. There's a lot of great people in town. Yeah, these will be great. That'll be heaps of fun. But two weeks later, we triumphantly return to Brisbane. We do two podcasts. The first one's nearly sold out.

It's at 3 o'clock. There's very few tickets left. So get onto that. We've just put on a second podcast at 4.15. So they are separately ticketed events. So get onto that. If you've already got your ticket for 3 o'clock get another one for 4.15 if you haven't got any tickets

man get on now because you guys in Brisbane are the anti-Adelaide you are the Cain and Abel you two so do it quick because you guys are buying them up quick

and we can't put on a third one we just don't have time but we do love you Brisbane we love your love. Yeah. It's great. Yeah, they've always been super fun up there. Looking forward to getting back and seeing all the peeps there.

Sorry it takes us so long to get over there. But yeah, this will be worth it. Again, great guests in town. The show's going to be awesome. And great venue. Hey-ya bar. Hey-ya bar's sick. Oh, man.

Great venue. And it is great food. Man, it's a fucking – it's a little slice of Melbourne up there, isn't it? Yeah, it is. A little slice of heaven. Yeah. And Kate Rudge who runs the – there's a usual comedy room that's there every week, Hey Ya Comedy.

So she helps us out with that. So please go. If you're in Brisbane, there's not a lot of awesome regular comedy rooms. So a little free plug there for Kate Rudge and Hey Ya Comedy. Go support that gig, yeah. Whoever's good that's in town at the time

always goes there it's like I said it's a great room it's a great little part of town I'm looking forward to I'm looking forward to doing it this year

because the last time we went to Brisbane I was really sick on the day so I did not have a very good time so I'm looking forward to trying to keep myself

healthy so that I actually have a good time at these shows right okay it's going to be fun. You know what? You know what's a good feeling?

Going to a show where you know it's sold out. Yeah. So that's what's going to happen. You're right. That is a good feeling. Yeah. What other good feelings do you enjoy? I was thinking about this the other day.

I was thinking about this the other day. Because, you know, I cop shit for being too negative about stuff. I was thinking, you know what? I'm going to work on this. I'm going to have a new segment every week. Okay. I'm going to have, like, what Carl likes, what Carl's positive about every week. I'm going to find, not this week because I'll have to do a bit of research.

We're doing this ad for an episode that we've already recorded in which you did not do the segment. Yes. Well, we did talk about some things I like. Yeah, that's true. That's true. Southeast Asian country. Sizzle. Yes.

So that's my homework for this week. I'm going to write it down right now. Positive. Positive, that's true. That's true. Southeast Asian country. Sizzle. Yes. So that's my homework for this week. I'm going to write it down right now. Positive. Positive Carl. Happy Carl. What does happy Carl like? That's happening. That's to come.

So that's Adelaide. That's Brisbane. That's Melbourne. That's all the info. That's all the stuff we need to say, right? That's all the live shows coming up. Obviously later in the year. Feel free to annoy us with requests for your town,

except if your town's shitty and too small. But, hey, you know what? Like we say in the episode, keep your eye on the social medias. Keep your eye on, you know, just keep your ear on the podcast in general because the Thailand trip is going to get locked in. Yeah. We are going to go. At the moment, it's looking like June.

Well, I'll say you still haven't convinced me yet. Yeah, well. Wow. I'm still holding out. Yeah convinced me yet. Yeah, well. Wow. I'm still holding out. Yeah, all right. All right. All right. I'll convince you.

All right. So then all we have to talk about now is the – thank you for supporting the show, obviously. I said on social media the other day we had a bumper 2016. It was awesome. We had a lot of first-time guests who were great. We did the biggest shows we've ever done. Yes.

Pretty much every city we went to last year, we had to either find a bigger venue or we had to do two episodes to meet the demand. Yes. And that was awesome. This was the year where we really crossed over, by which I mean we died and we now present the show from the spirit realm. Yeah. From hell.

Yeah. So thank you for doing that. This year, I reckon 2017 is going to get bigger again. By the look of ticket sales already, From hell. Yeah. So thank you for doing that. This year, I reckon 2017 is going to get bigger again. By the look of ticket sales already, that is looking like the case. I mean, it should be the aim, shouldn't it? Yeah. But plenty of people don't do that.

Not everything goes up and up and up. Yeah, sure. At some stage, we're going to get less popular. Hey, Steve Martin, we'll have that first night where we look out and see an empty seat. We've reached the top of the roller coaster. Yeah. And then we just star in the jerk instead. Yeah.

So Melbourne is selling ridiculously. Brisbane is selling ridiculously. Adelaide is Adelaide. Yeah. That doesn't count. Adelaide, I will say at this point, is selling ridiculously by Adelaide standards. So there's still improvement.

We're one ticket up on this time last year. Yeah, pretty much. Yeah. Yeah, very good. So thanks for all the support, including buying the T-shirts. You guys are buying heaps of T-shirts. And the Patreon, of course, that we always plug. Thank you for all the people that are currently doing that, chipping in. As you know, at a certain price, you get different little rewards.

For $5, you get the monthly newsletter magazine, which we put a lot of work into. For $10, you get the bonus episode. And then, you know, for $2 to $5, whatever and up, all those guys get their names read out at some stage. So this is the point where we do a bit of that. We thank people individually for checking their money and whether they like it or not. Their names are now going out into the…

In the public domain. Yeah, into the public realm. People don't know this. When you support the show on Patreon, what you're doing is you're giving over ownership of your name to us. Yes. And the ATO take all these names down.

Your driver's license becomes the intellectual property of this podcast. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just by you chipping in. Fuck. I've got my driver's license, my driver's number plate. I've got to put that on my car.

My driver's number plate. Yes. That's a that on my car. My driver's number plate. Yes. That's a technical term, yeah? Yes. So, thank you. Thank you to Patreoners, to Patreon subscribers. Thank you to John Azzopardi. John Azzopardi.

Yeah. John Vazzo Party in my pants. And you're invited because you put money into the show. Nice. I did it. He had a, John, as a fundraising party that he threw for us and it came through. Nice. Good on you, Johnny.

Thanks, Johnny. Azzo party. Wow. Okay. Thank you to Oliver Ness. Oliver Ness. Oliver Ness Oliver Ness What am I going to do

With Olive Fuck What am I going to do with I dropped my money That you gave me What am I going to do with Oliver Ness

Is that a thing That's not a thing I think it's as much of a thing As we're going to get out of that name Ness It makes me think of Elliot Ness You know

The Untouchable I don't know what that is. You don't know what The Untouchables is? No. You know, it was an old show. It was like they were after,

Elliot Ness was like the head investigator and they were bringing down Al Capone and it was remade in the 80s. Kevin Costner played Elliot Ness

and Sean Connery was on it and Bobby De Niro played Al Capone. None of it rings a bell? None of it rings a bell. Fuck. Great movie. I've heard of that name before, The Untouchables, but no.

The Untouchables, think of the opposite of your penis. Because you touch it all the time. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, okay. The very touchable. Because it sort of sounded like you were saying it to be like a burn, but it's kind of not. Like you're saying a lot of people touch my peeps. Oh, yeah.

Well, I wasn't. I was more thinking of you touching it. Which is cool. But even just if it's me touching it all the time, man, that's cool as hell. That's positive. Jerking your dick, that's cool, man. Oh, is that cool? That's really cool.

Right. Did that used to be not cool and you've brought it back or something? Yeah. It's so retro at the moment. Only 90s kids will get this. Is it What's Hot for 2017? Pretty much, yeah. It's in the hot column.

Oh, nice. Yeah, it got written up in New Idea. Was it in Hit Magazine, The Herald Sun? Yes. Was it What's Hot? Is it still What's Hot, What's Not? Or have they come up – I remember, didn't they used to have some – it was like Sizzles and Fizzles or some bullshit like that.

Oh, yuck. Yeah. No, What's Hot and What's Not. What bullshit like that. yuck. Yeah. No, what's hot and what's not. What's hot and what's not. Yeah. All right. Well,

my dick is red hot. Keep doing, keep touching yourself guys out there until it goes into the what's not column. Yeah. That's what I say. Yeah. Thanks,

Oliver. That's what we got out of your name. Thank you to Tom Lear. Tom Lear. King Lear as far as I'm concerned for chipping in. Very nice. It's L-E-A. Oh, okay.

So maybe it's like Lee. Maybe it's Meadow Lee. Yeah, I think maybe. Yeah, Lee. Is it Lee? Tom Lee? Like Tommy Lee. Hey, boned Pamela Anderson.

What's better than that in the world? Nothing. I think controversial opinion. Right. Pam Anderson. Yes. Hottest chick ever. Oh, it's not controversial. I'm with you. So hot. I'm controversial opinion. Right. Pam Anderson. Yes. Hottest chick ever. Oh, it's not controversial.

I'm with you. So hot. I'm with you. Like those big boobs. That's so hot. Now you're making fun. She is. See, people go on about Marilyn Monroe.

She's the. She goes on about Marilyn Monroe. Everyone. Everyone. When? When was the last time you were in a conversation where people were, and I'll use your term, going on about Marilyn Monroe? Well, look, not on the streets.

But – What about in the sheets? Yeah, well. She's an enduring icon. We get it. You're friends with JFK. But Pam Anderson, I think a lot of people you would ask of that at a certain age where you go, number one.

So Pam Anderson is the modern day Marilyn Monroe. Yes, that's what I'm saying. Okay, so my question to you, who's the next in line? And I'll go as far to say this, you know that iconic scene where Marilyn Monroe stood above like a little vent and blew her dress up. Yes. The modern day that is the Tommy Lee sex video

where you see her get railed on a boat. That's the modern day that. Where you see it fully go in. Yeah. That's the modern day that. Where you see the breeze from the vent fully go in. Yeah, yeah. I guess that kind of was the closest thing to a sex tape back in those days, wasn't it?

Yes. Yeah. Yeah, that vent was a sex tape. That's hot. Yeah. That's really hot. I'm going to jerk off to that photo when I get home. There was a lot of people getting home from the cinema and seeing their own air conditioning

and like jerking off to that. How many times, if you had to estimate in your life, have you jerked it to Pammy? Oh, look, I don't like to get too deep into this sort of thing. Welcome back to Parkinson. Wouldn't that have been great if Parkinson... Look, I'll say this. If this was an episode of 20 to 1, 20 to 1 hot chicks that Chando's jerked it to... Oh, man, that would be great.

I'll tell you what. I'd be tuning closer to 8.30 than 7.30. Put it that way. Are you allowed to say this? You've been doing some work on 20 to 1. Yeah, well, I'm sure they want to be affiliated with my brand after saying that. But I was going to say, that would be funny if they get there like, hey, we need you to write this script, and you just don't even look at their brief.

You literally just send them a list of top 20 chicks that you'd love to fuck. And then with the invoice attached in the same email and you've quoted them this insane amount. What if we did that? Then that, we talk about the roast. Then that would be a great live episode. A 20 to 1? We just did a 20 to 1 episode about something.

Oh, fuck yeah. That would be very funny. Should we do it? Should we just do a special themed episode one week? 20 to 1. Oh, that's not a bad idea. 20 to 1 themed episode. Because I have, I always look at 20 to 1 as a show and go,

man, there's so much potential if you took it real far, if you went crazy with it. Because at the moment you just go 20 to 1, funny looking animals. You're like, cool, hippos, awesome. It needs to be on, you're right, it needs to be not on a commercial net. It should go, if they did like a Netflix version where they could just do whatever the fuck they wanted, that would be great.

Yeah, 20 to 1, fucked shit. 20 to come. Alright, let's do it. the fuck they wanted. Yeah. That would be great. Yeah. 20 to 1, fuck shit. 20 to come. Yeah. All right. Let's do it. Let's do an episode of this show where we do a 20 to 1 thing. All right.

We can't get sued for that on a free podcast, can we? Surely not. We'll call it 19 to 1. What about that? Yeah, there you go.

Great. Bang. Oh, fuck, I should be a lawyer. Thanks, Pammy. No,

who was that? Thanks, Tom. Thanks, Pammy, for just being the hottest chick in the whole world. Yeah, for taking the mantle from Marilyn. For scratching my seven-year itch.

Who's the new Pammy? The new, new. Do we need a new? I guess we do. Well, at some stage, who's in? I mean, we won't know for sure. You know what I mean? It takes a little while to crystallise.

Yeah. But who will be in, you know, like 10 years or whatever, who will we say that was the next – she was the next in line? Oh, see, I would have said – Is this conversation okay? Yeah, I don't know. I don't know. Because she's very unique, Pamela Anderson, where she's not –

well, you know who is, sort of. Kim Kardashian Sort of I think you might be right Yeah So Is the criteria Big media presence Sort of

Like some kind of Sex tape scandal In the public eye 14 year old 14 year old Masturbation fodder Yes I think you're right

I think it's definitely Kim Yeah Because Pammy was never A big movie star Like she was You know She was Fourth banana On a weird TV show.

Yeah. Barbed wire. Yeah. Barbed wire, the animated series. But movies, you know, they tried her on barbed wire. It wasn't any good. Yeah. Was she on anything else?

A couple of like weird shows? Yeah. No proper movies. Yeah. So I think you're right. I think it's Kim. Probably Borat was her best movie she was ever in. Good point.

Yeah. We need to let Kim know. We've got to tweet at her. Hey, we've handed the crown to you at the start of our podcast. Want to come on sometime? Yeah. That'll do more harm to her than her getting robbed in Paris, I think. So what's Kim's air vent moment then?

Another sex tape again. Okay. So the air vent was only there before they kind of worked out the concept of the sex tape. And now it's just the sex tape element of it is never evolving. The sex tape is just there forever. Well, until there's some technology where everyone… Sex VR. Yeah, exactly.

Exactly. Well, you don't have to watch anymore. You just do it, which is bad. Look, I'm not in favour of it, but I'm saying it's inevitable. I'm not going to use it, but there are going to be people out there that are, and I'm going to be saying to them you shouldn't. Thanks, Tom. Yeah, thanks, Kim.

Anyway, thank you to Sarah Jane Robertson. Oh, nice. Yeah. Nice. Anyway Thank you to Sarah Jane Robertson Oh nice Yeah Nice The first I think the first Patroner That has been

Named After a Doctor Who Companion Maybe Okay I don't know what that is But okay

There was a Character called Sarah Jane Okay I was nearly going to go With Spider-Man Girlfriend But that's Mary Jane First Patrioner

who has the same last name as my mum's maiden name. Oh. That's something. That is something. Wow, that's two great gets for you Sarah Jane.

Well done SJ. It feels weird talking about my mum after the preceding conversation that we were having. I was going to go with it feels weird just talking about Sarah Jane

after that previous one but sorry Sarah Jane. This is unfortunate timing isn't it? It's not like we knew this was coming up. But I think Sarah Jane after that previous one. But sorry, Sarah Jane. This is unfortunate timing, isn't it? It's not like we knew this was coming up. But I think Sarah Jane's a lovely name. Yeah, it is. Also, so Jane's not her middle name. People don't put their middle names in this thing.

Okay, so Sarah hyphenation. There's no hyphenation. Well, because the whole back end of her name is my mum's maiden name. Jane Robertson. Yeah. Is your mum's name Jane Robertson? Yeah. Wow. Until she changed it to Daslo Robertson. For when I

got into comedy. Mum and dad both changed their names when I was about to get into comedy and they said you have to pick which parent you want to use the last name of for your stand-up career. If you could marry Pamela Anderson, would you change your... This is a dumb question considering it's you

Would you change your last name to hers Tommy Anderson Yeah sure Would you? Yeah And then I'd pretend that I'm Will Anderson's son Right Is that really the bit of it you're looking forward to?

That relationship? So I marry Pam Anderson Yes Is it a condition of the marriage that I have to take her last name? Yeah. Okay. Yeah, I guess I'd do it because being married to Pamela Anderson would make me happier than anything in the world because as we've discussed, she is, was and always will be the hottest

woman on the planet. Right. And imagine being married to her. So good. So I can't get your vibe whether you're being ironic or not. I'm being ironic. You are? Yes.

That's a shame. Because she's a pretty lady. She's an attractive lady. Are you saying that she's not attractive? I'm not saying she's not attractive. So you're being ironic by saying she's attractive, but then you're going, yeah, I'm ironic. I'm not saying she's not attractive.

I think it's funny in 2017 to be obsessed with Pam Anderson. That's what I think is funny about her. Okay, all right. In this day and age – Then colour me funny. Can we do – can we – for one of our next live shows, can we print up a big backdrop that's just a picture of Pammy and just have that hanging behind us while we podcast? What do you reckon?

By the way, I was about to say – I was about to ask when – at what point will this happen? But I think it happened long ago. My question was going to be how long is it until this show is just fully morphed into Blokes World? No. I've always got a fear of that. This bit hasn't helped. This is not a regular occurrence.

We're not just going to sit there and do an episode of Hot or Not. Again, we're not far off. Yeah. All right. Thanks, Sarah Jane. Thanks, Sarah Jane. Thanks, Tommy's mum. Bit more of a fan of Mary Jane, if're not far off. Yeah. All right. Thanks, Sarah Jane. Thanks, Sarah Jane. Thanks, Tommy's mum. Bit more of a fan of Mary Jane, if you know what I'm saying.

Oh. Her sister. Your mum's sister. Oh, you're hot for auntie. Okay, I get it. Thank you to Lauren Barry. Lauren Barry? Yeah, B-A-R-R-I-E. Oh, I would not have picked that. Yeah. Lauren Barry. Lauren Barry? Yeah, B-A-R-R-I-E.

Oh, I would not have picked that. Yeah. Lauren Barai. Yeah, Lauren, very pretty name, I think. In history, history will say that. Okay. Name an example from history. A girl I knew at high school, her name was Lauren,

and she was very pretty. Oh, we've all read about her in the history books. Yeah, yeah. In the Maryborough High history books. Yeah. Yeah, she. In the Maryborough High history books. Yeah. Yeah. She was – she's very attractive. What if history at school as a subject,

it wasn't like you reading about the Crusades and stuff. It was literally just your history teacher telling you their personal history. Right. So they come in, year seven you just spend it learning about just this old dude. You learn about the first time he had sex. Right. Just learning about history teachers. Yeah, and then you have an exam on it at the end.

What I like better is if you learn history later in life, say you're like my age or later and you go to do history class, but it's like your own history. It's like high school history and it's basically you going up and going and the teacher's going, and we all remember Hot Lauren from year nine. Yeah, right. And it's like, school history and it's basically you going up going and the teacher's going and we all remember hot lauren from yeah right nine because by that fuck yeah yeah you're getting a bit older your memory's starting to go so it's like a refresh it's a midway through your life yes you're about to go into the midlife crisis just to make you feel even worse about it yes here's a bit of a primer a refresher course stuff that you've probably forgotten yeah just

to make you more depressed exactly so it's a cool idea it's like that thing where you forget algebra as you come out of high school whatever instead of going back to relearn that because you've learned in life you don't need that yeah you go back and learn about what you've already done what you've done that's not a bad idea yeah i like it so because sometimes you feel bad like i've always thought you know say when i was 20 i was thinking i had this great memory and i was like i never forget anything i remember everything that's ever happened yeah at some stage your mind fills up with too many memories and you don't remember everything. I will say you've got a pretty dodgy memory, I will say. Okay.

Yeah. I think it's okay. What's an example of me having a dodgy memory? Me telling you stories and then you forgetting that I'm the one that's told you the story and you telling it back to me. Oh, yeah. I have gotten bad at that. And inventing details to make it more saucy, which I know were not in them.

I haven't got a good memory with that way. You've got a bad – you repeat things to me. And to be fair, I do the same thing. Yeah. But you'll tell me something and then a day later you'll retell it to me. Yeah. You don't – for whatever reason, you've decided it's not worth cataloguing what you've told to who and when.

Yes. Which doesn't matter. That's fine. No, no. I agree. And that is why I admit I have a dodgier memory now because I honestly remember being like 20 and going, telling someone a story and them going,

I don't remember that. And me going, I remember telling you 12th of October that story. I've told this guy, this guy, and this guy that story. I know what I've told to who this guy and this guy that story I know what I've told to who and when I had a catalogue of all

you still have a good memory of the stories you're good at holding onto information because you know that you might be able to bring it out at a later date

but yeah the specifics of who and when how you discovered the story is a mystery to you but that's fine that's the least important bit

exactly yeah exactly yeah thanks whoever the fuck that was Lauren oh Lauren hot Lauren thanks hot Lauren

thanks hot thanks hot and that'll do okay yeah do we have do we have time for one more I think

we haven't quite hit half an hour yet so I think just to pad this thing out a bit, we should do one more. All right. Thank you to one more. The love of my life, Pamela Lee Anderson. Pamela Lee Anderson chips in. Yeah. How much does she put in?

Five bucks. Five bucks? Yeah. So she's getting the magazine. Yeah, she gets the magazine. I was going to write an article. I was going to do some saucy cartoons of me and her viz style that I might have to leave out of this one.

How dare you? Well, you know what? I guess she's given back to publishing. You know, she got her fame through Playboy magazine, so she's like a patron of the arts of the publishing world. The idea that Pam Anderson is sitting around going, it's really about time I started giving back to publishing. It's done so much for me.

Yes. She's using a bit of that Baywatch dollar on us. Nice. I appreciate it. Any of the barbed wire dollar going in, you think? Or just any of the Borat dollar? Look, if she was subscribed for $2 a month, I'd go, that's probably the barbed wire dollar. Do you think she's got it all set?

You know, like how Jay Leno famously never spent any of his Tonight Show money. Yeah. Just lives off his stand-up money. Right. That's like her. I've never touched his Tonight Show money. Yeah. Just lives off his stand-up money. Right. That's like her. I've never touched that Borat money. No, she – well, hopefully – yeah, that would be more likely.

I'd like to think she's not touching the Baywatch money, but she'd be living off the barbed wire money. Nice. Okay, yeah, yeah. She'd be living off the – what other show does she do? Oh, VIP. VIP. VIP.

Yeah. Very underrated show. Very underrated show. Very underrated show. Yeah, that was, we had Foxtel when I was growing up and that was a titillating number that would, yeah, awoke a lot of things in a teenage Tommy Dastley. Oh, really? Yeah. I would say, I never watched Baywatch. I never watched it.

Yeah, I don't think, it was on Channel 10. Yeah. Like, I remember it being on And I remember thinking Hey This looks pretty cool Yeah I should watch this Yeah

But then I remember watching it And just not thinking it was a good show Yeah Just thinking like it was kind of boring Yes But VIP I would say this That's when Pamela peaked

VIP Into her 30s Yeah When she was on VIP What about Do you remember when she came out here and she that they put her in the big brother house as an intruder yeah it was one of the greatest tv moments because she goes in and you just saw all like the kind of bloke that's on big brother

you just saw all of them in the house clearly thinking i'm gonna fuck pammy live on tv they clearly all thought yeah it was just gonna descend into some Roman-style orgy within minutes, which is like, use your fucking head. But of course they're going to think that. Have your penis to have sex with. Of course they're going to think that because they're the sort of people that want to be on Big Brother and more importantly got into Big Brother

because the sort of people they pick for it are fucking idiots. Is there, I mean, apart from friend of the show, Ryan Fitzgerald. Yeah. And I think there's also, there's an ex-Big Brother contestant who I think listens to this show. I'm not going to name him. Sarah Marie?

Jessica Parker. Sarah Marie? The bum dance? Does she listen? Yeah, maybe. Let's find out. If you listen to this show and you've ever been on Big Brother, hit us up.

Great. Any of the previous winners, the guy that fucking parachuted into the house one year. Trevor, the guy with dreadlocks that won one time. Blair McDonough. Is that how you pronounce his name? Blair. Blair that used to be on Neighbours and was on Big Brother.

It was once in the audience because he's friends with Andrew O'Keefe. That's right. And heckled me in a live show. We've got to get O'Keefe back on this thing. Fuck. I love O'Keefe. We've been trying to. I love O'Keefe. That's right. And heckled me in a live show. We've got to get O'Keefe back on this thing. Fuck. I love O'Keefe. We've been trying to. I love O'Keefe.

To the listeners who have listened to that episode like five years ago now or something, we regularly try. Every time we're in Sydney, we hit him up. When we know he's down here, we hit him up. We've never been able to get it to work. He is keen, but he's a very busy man. Yeah. He's busy.

He's great. He's a great man. He was great. He was great on that episode. He was very nice about the show. He loved being on it. And this was years ago. Think how much better we'd be now. Yeah. And we great on that episode. He was very nice about the show. He loved being on it. And this was years ago. Think how much better we'd be now.

Yeah. And we're more popular now. Yeah. Like, I mean, we want to get – I'd love to get him on a live show. I'd love to get – Grant and Daniel loved being on there last year when he was on the first time. And he was like, yeah, I want to do a live show. O'Keefe doesn't have Twitter, does he?

No. I don't think he's got social media stuff. No. I was going to say we could, you know, lead the chart. I mean, the only reason Daniel came on was because you freaks harassed him so much. Yes, yes. Just like my other love, which is Larry Emder. We should get him back on.

We're going to get Larry back. We're going to get Pammy on next time she's in the country. Please. Next time she's in for the next Big Brother reboot. Please get Pammy on. She came out here to be an intruder on Big Brother. We could get her out here to be an intruder on this podcast. She came out here to be an intruder on Big Brother. We could get her out here to be an intruder on this podcast. Get her to be the intruder in the Thailand podcast.

This podcast is at least as popular as Big Brother right before it got cancelled the first time, I'm going to say. Yeah. We get bigger crowds at our live shows than they have people in the house of Big Brother. That's something. And it is sort of like the diary room aspect of the show where we just like tee off on each other. Yeah. Except it's in a more public forum. Yeah.

All right. All. Alright guys. We've got goals. That's good. We set ourselves some goals for 2017. Thanks Pammy. Oh yeah, thanks Pammy. That's who the person was. So thanks everyone who contributes to the Patreon. Patreon.com slash LittleDumbDumbClub if you would like to chip in.

You can find all these links, all these live shows, tickets to our solo shows and everything. LittleDumbDumbClub.com. Thanks to everyone who's bought tickets to our solo shows and everything, littledumbdumbclub.com. Thanks to everyone who's bought tickets to show so far and is supporting the show. Get into it. They are selling quickly. We are going to have our first sold-out run in Melbourne this year.

Yeah, which feels awesome. Thanks so much for your support, everyone. It's awesome that you guys enjoy the show so much and that you wade through these ads, all those of you that do. If you've been skipping using the 15 second fast forward function on your iPhone and you're hearing this part of my voice

right now you're nearly good to go you can probably stop it here the episode's just about to start look the episode's about to start and it's a great one it's a really great one

but you know what we just did then was great too we're the greatest you know what I'm finding more we're the Pamela Anderson of podcasting that's what I'm saying

I'm finding more and more this part of the show this is just like a meeting for us. This is where we come up with all the stuff that we should be doing on the show later on. Yeah. We came up with the idea last week of our Brisbane mini episode later in the year. Yeah. Yeah.

Anyway, enjoy this episode with Scott Dooley and Limo. Hey mates, welcome once again into the Little Dumb Dumb Club for another week. Thank you very much for joining us. My name is Tommy Daslow and as always, sitting opposite me is the other half of the program, Carl Chandler. G'day dickhead. Yeah? Just before we rip into the guests, I just want to bring up this one little thing that I've discovered.

It's a little fun fact. It's about Tommy Daslow. Here we go. A little something that i've discovered it's a little fun fact it's about tommy daslow here we go a little uh a little something that i didn't know like a little fantail bit of information if you had your own fantail i like this yeah you like that yeah or a little uh under the lid of snapple of tommy daslow okay this is under the lid of a brand of drink that we don't get in this country yeah yeah yeah but it still exists so um we've got international listeners but people get it so uh i read this about you.

I was doing a bit of snooping on the internet the other day. Because you know what? You've got a Wikipedia page. I don't. Yes. I'm still pretty shitty about this. Yes. But my Wikipedia page is mostly made up,

which I think is probably going to destroy what you're about to say. Oh, no, no, no. Not at all. Okay. This is not Wikipedia. So then I started going through my – because I don't have a page. So I went to my IMDb page to have a bit of a look. And then I went to –

Big day in the Chandler household. Yeah, yeah. So then – How tall am I? Well, this is what we're getting to. So then I went to your page, your IMDb page. On your IMDb page, it says fun fact at the bottom, Tommy Daslow is 5'2".

Yes. What the fuck's going on there? I don't know. And it also says I fun fact at the bottom, Tommy Daslow is five foot two. Yes. What the fuck's going on there? I don't know. And it also says I'm a girl. Oh, does it? Yes. So Wikipedia, it's well known that it's very easy to bullshit around with. Yeah, yeah.

And edit and like, and it's not policed. Yeah. I always thought IMDB was a lot more strict. Yes. And so. Tony Martin takes it very seriously. Well, maybe Tony's the one who's done this. Yeah.

So it says that I'm five foot and that I'm a little girl and that a running joke on this podcast is that I'm constantly pretending that I'm a boy. I didn't read any of that. It just says Tommy Dasso is five foot two. That's all. Underlined it when – well, that's coming up on the podcast. Ben, what are you?

You're at least five foot three. Yeah. What's that about? It's – like I don't know – like I'd love least 5'3". Yeah. What's that about? It's like I don't know. Like I'd love to get that fixed. Yeah. But I can't bring myself to be the guy emailing IMDB and going. With a tape measure of yourself.

Yeah. A copy of today's newspaper. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Standing in front of a height chart. Yeah. It's the same with my Wikipedia. On my Wikipedia at one point, I think maybe it still says that a video went around of me spewing out a racist tirade on a bus. Which, you don't want that on your Wikipedia.

They also probably made some stuff up. Fuck, I'd shudder to think what's going on on my LinkedIn if I log in on that. Probably some horrific stuff. Well, today on the show we've got two guests who we haven't had on for quite a long time. First of all, you know him from Breakfast on Gold. It's Limo. G'day, guys. What's going on with your online presence?

Can I just say two things? One, Tommy, the riot at Fools Festival wasn't as a result of my set on stage. I wasn't back there. Yes. And second, Carl Chandler, so let me get this straight. You've sat at home. You've Googled yourself. Yes. You've checked for a Wikipedia page. Yep. You've checked your IMDB page. Yes. Okay. And second, Carl Chandler, so let me get this straight. You've sat at home, you've Googled yourself. Yes. You've checked for a Wikipedia page. Yep.

You've checked your IMDB page. Yep. What happened after that? Wank in the mirror? That's what you do. You gotta look at... No, no, I couldn't get it up after I found out I didn't have a Wikipedia page. Also joining us, he's back in the country for a brief visit. It's been a long time since he's been on the show.

Please welcome back Scott Dooley. Hello, boys. My one that I get stuck into is celebrities' net worth. Oh, yes. I'm a big fan of finding out how much Chingy's worth right now. You know, that kind of, it's always obscure. Who's Chingy? Chingy, he had one song called Right Thar.

Yeah. And what is his net worth? I don't know. It's like 12 mil or something. It's always obscure. Who's Chingy? Chingy, he had one song called Right Thar. Yeah. And what is his net worth? I don't know. It's like 12 mil or something. It's not bad, is it, Chingy? You know what? You know what? I was going to say this for an episode with Lawrence Mooney,

but I am into that as well. And this is the wiki net worth. Lawrence Mooney has got a particularly good one. You can find that about him Yeah Wow Yeah It's got some fucking

And it's clearly written by someone Who English is not their first language Or it's been translated back and forth a few times Right Because there's some really weird phrases and stuff in there So was it written by Dil? Yeah, maybe Like literally it says like

Here's his opening paragraph. Lawrence Mooney, an Australian famous actor, writer, television and radio personality and host. He is well known as a comedian as well. Yes, he is none other than Lawrence Mooney. Hang on, Moonman wrote this himself. He born to his parents and grew up with his friend and siblings. With his friend. So he's got one.

He's got one. What's very unique about Lawrence is that he was born to his parents. Most of us are out there. We're born to random animals or people we've never met before. A famous Australian multi-talented humorous person, Lawrence Mooney has not opened up about his net worth and salary. He has also not revealed how much money he earns through his career and professions. But we present to you his assets and property.

Wow. We present to you. Is this like some sort of Russian hack slash WikiLeaks arrangement? But also the fact of phrasing that like he's some kind of weirdo for just not regularly opening dirty laundry with a declaration of his net worth. Like every other well-meaning person on TV does. Trump won't even do it. Why should Lawrence Mooney do it? You know when you have that fight with your girlfriend

where she goes, why don't you tell me how you feel? Why don't you tell me what your net worth is? Why don't I just present you a list of your assets and then we'll make a decision from there. He has not shown his salary and net worth but he is a rich media person in the Australia. So sometimes media covered him as an Australian media millionaire.

He has easily survived himself and his family through his salary. And without it, he also bought cars and house through his salary. Cars and house. Yeah. He has a well furnished house in Melbourne and well decorated as well. Oh,ished House in Melbourne And well decorated as well Oh that's creepy

And well decorated This is an inside joke Yeah This person's planning To kill him Sleeps like a baby Usually turns in Around 11pm

This is supposed To be a proper bio of him According to his twitter He has two expensive cars That is a classic Mooney tweet Took one of my Expensive cars out today

Hey, hey, don't cut me short He has two expensive cars and a bike as well He said in some interview Let's not go specific He said in some interview that he and his family spent maximum money in shopping I think that was on the show once, I remember that When he said he spent maximum money in shopping Yeah, that was a great riff

We were like, why are you talking like this? It's a weird question, how much money are you spending I think that was on the show once. I remember that. When he said he spent maximum money. Yeah, that was a great riff. We were like, why are you talking like this? It's a weird question. How much money are you spending when you go shopping? Maximum. Then he does this thing where he literally, they literally say, I won't read it out, but they literally name his wife and where she works.

Oh, what? And then his kids and how old they are and their full names and middle names and stuff. Then it says, the couple is still living very happily with their friends and family in Melbourne. I don't know why I keep saying they live with their friends. They live with their friends. Their friends and family in Melbourne. So there is no chance of any divorce.

Watch this, Spai. Sometimes media covered rumours that the couple were going to divorce, but they immediately critics about the rumours. They immediately critics? Yeah. I like to critics rumours. He is standing taller height and average of weight. He has a perfect body. Taller than five foot?

Yeah. He has a perfect body. So there you go. See, up until now. Yeah. And now I just think Lawrence wrote it. Yeah. This is on a bender of Moody.

In Adelaide one night, he's just gone, oh, this makes sense. This makes sense. Also, I need to make 350 words, so I'm just going to have to double up on a few thoughts here. Yeah. Once he finished with the advertiser reviewer. Yeah. So what's his net worth? Read it out.

Oh, man, it doesn't even say after all that. There's not even a number? No. All that bullshit, all that research. Yes. No one can put a number to it. There's about five paragraphs and then it doesn't have a number there. That sounds pretty – I would suspect any name that you put into this website,

it's just that exact same bio. Because there's nothing that specific. Saying we're all married to Lawrence's wife. yeah yeah yeah that's what says live with friends yeah yeah yeah no we all we all live in front with friends and family now it does have there's a few more like little bio details and stuff and like that but uh yeah i don't know you know what maybe i'll look up uh you guys i mean we're no chance of being in it i don't think i'd be in there lemo you might be in there let's have have a look. Let's have a quick look. Here we go.

But I can confirm. Lemo did turn up to this podcast in a helicopter, so I'm expecting big things of this. That has given me an idea, though. No, neither of you. Sorry. I like the description of humorous person. I might put that on a business card.

It's good. What's his website? Give him a plug. It's wikinet a business card. It's good. What's his website? Give him a plug. Humorous person. It's wikinetworth.com. Oh, right. Yeah. So are they an officially sanctioned part of the –

I would say not. I don't think the people at Wikipedia have gone through and Googled everyone using the word wiki in their title and put lawsuits around. Do you remember like maybe it was about four or five years ago, Wikipedia went on this, like, big desperate pledge for money. Like, any time you went on there, there'd be a big banner up the top going, hey, we need – and I, like, I don't know why I did this at the time.

I just gave them – like, I donated, like, $2 because it just had a thing you could click and put in your PayPal and I did it. And now because they've got my email address, they've gone back around on another pledge drive and they've been emailing me, like, every day. Like, it's fucking – I did the same now because they've got my email address, they've gone back around on another pledge drive and they've been emailing me like every day. Like it's fucking dead. I did the same. I get a bit.

I put in 20 bucks. Put in 20 bucks, whatever. And you don't even have a page, you fucking loser. Oh, yeah. Who do you think you are, Lawrence Mooney with expensive cars and a bike? Mind you, mysteriously at the bottom of Tommy's page it says he's a tight ass. I don't know where that came from. But like, you know, four or five years ago whenever they did that first run it was like,

yeah, Wikipedia is this amazing resource and it would be a real shame if it closed down. But now we all know that like literally everything on there is untrue. So it's a bit funny for them to come back and go, guys, come on, if you don't donate, this thing that is absolute bullshit will cease to exist. This thing that is spreading lies about you that is impossible to get anything to change on there. I have on more than one occasion brought up a fact from a Wikipedia page live in an interview and been told, no, that didn't happen. Oh, really?

Who with? You know, the most recent one was Ashton Kutcher's partner is… Mila Kunis. Mila Kunis. They're not really married. Eh? They're not really married. No, no.

She's just done a film and it was… Now, I didn't see the film, right? So I did my research on Wikipedia. What a great experienced broadcaster I am, right? It's great to know that Breakfast Radio isn't that different from podcasting. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I didn't see the film and I can't even remember the name of the film but on Wikipedia it said that her actual – it was to do with families, the film.

Her mum was in the film and her co-star's mum was also in the film. And I thought that's a neat fact that their actual parents were in the film. So I say something to her about, hey, it's really cool that you're able to get your mum and your co-star, your actual mum's in the film. And she goes, oh, you mean that? And she was so, she was really nice. I've got to guess she was so fucking nice. She could have been a complete arsehole.

She was so nice. She goes, oh, you mean the, that sort of quirky little thing we did after the credits at the end? So it was like a real life, they weren't in the film at all. Right. They weren't in the film. The little blooper reel at the end. It wasn't even a blooper reel.

It was like a separate, just filming her with her mum having a coffee. Right. And it was in the credits as a nice way of saying, hey, here's Mooloo with a real mum. So we, you know, we tend to try and pair people up on the podcast that might work well together. And to be honest, we just went, you guys, we went, they've been in the media, they probably know each other.

And when you guys rocked up and you went, oh, and we're like, oh, fuck, thank God for that. Well, let me just say quickly, I texted Limo last night to say, do you want to do this? It's with duels. And you wrote back and said, yeah, we're not talking at the moment. So it should be cool. And I'll be honest, I was like, yes, this is going to be great.

Attention for the whole episode. We won't have to do shit. We can just sit back and just ride this wave. Or the opposite. If they're not talking at the moment, we'll have to do everything. That hour of dead air was brought to you by Limo and Duels. Come and see our shows.

We talk. They're maintaining their feud. But you guys have actually been holiday together. Well, we – so going back further, we lived together in Sydney. Oh, right. Yeah. So we lived together in Bondi for a year. If this doesn't show up in the WikiNet worth.

Yeah. You live with friends. What about your family? All our families. Both of our families and each other. Were you born to parents, though? That's my big question. I know Doolz was.

I was, yeah. My parents, in inverted commas, are always weird when I bring it up, so I don't know. Read out your old address and then WikiNet worth can look up that address and what it's worth now and they can sort of start to work backwards and piece together your net worth based on what you

would have been earning back then. By the look of that website, they are not interested in what you're worth. They just want weird scurrilous made up details. Well, this is one thing about that building we lived in. It was a pretty cool place. Like it was a really cool place where we lived. Do you remember the guy? It's going back Nearly ten years

He was a merchant diver for the Navy And he was cleaning up a boat In Sydney Harbour He used to clear mines It was a Navy diver who would clear mines And he was doing some Manoeuvre in Sydney Harbour

And he got attacked by a shark And he lost his arm and his leg. Yeah, we have him on the show all the time. The shark. He ended up living in our apartment and in our apartment, not our apartment, but in our apartment building. There's a guy

in the lounge. I don't know where he came from. Yeah, he's got lots of muscles but not all his legs. Yeah, he says he doesn't have to pay full rent because he doesn't have all the... Yeah, it's like the fugitive meets the odd couple. Who finished the milk? It was the one-armed man. And he would have gotten away with it

if it wasn't for the fact he can't run away. He moved into our apartment building and there was this bloke that was a bit of a prick. And so the Navy's put him up in this place near Bondi Beach, which I thought, a bit of insult to enjoy there. So he can always remember the good times. You can almost see your arm from here. He moves in.

Do I see a shark rubbing its belly? Thank you. And rubbing its belly with your arm. So he's in the house and the little fun fact, he's on the second floor, no elevator in our building. Oh, very nice. So he's up there. But the bloke underneath him complained and he actually had to move out

because he'd get up to have a leak in the middle of the night and he couldn't be bothered putting on the prosthetic leg, so he'd hop and the guy got annoyed from the sound of the name. Oh, wow. I honestly thought you were going to say, you know, that old thing of like someone's living above you and you're like, oh, there's the sound of one shoe dropping. I'll just go to sleep once the second shoe drops.

Oh, fuck, it's never happening. I can't get to sleep. That's brutal. That's a pretty bad advertisement for how the Navy treats its... Well, I think the Navy was all right. It's not like the guy underneath was an admiral. He was just some punter. And then so the guy had to move out in the end.

Which isn't a bad ending to that story when you consider some other stories I've heard that have involved men with prosthetic legs going to the toilet in the middle of the night. Pistorius. Oh, yeah. Sorry. I'll explain the sporting references to Tommy.

I'm sorry, I haven't read a newspaper for five years. I'm sorry, guys. What's his net worth these days? Oscar for stories. God, that rings a bell. His net worth is not measured in money. It's cigarettes now, I believe. So that guy, though, he would –

Dools and I would be schlepping around in his house just being sort of fat, lazy Bondi residents. This guy moves in. He's bouncing out of bed every morning. He's jogging. He's going for runs. He's jogging. He's surfing.

He's going to the gym. Every time you saw him, he's up and about. G'day, guys. How you going? Isn't it a beautiful day? Oh, yeah. I think I know who really made that complaint in the building now. Well, if he'd just bought us that pack of cigarettes when we asked.

He was going out. Did he write a book? Yeah. Yes. You know what? My girlfriend used to work in PR in books. She may well have toured him. She toured him.

We interviewed him in studio. My girlfriend would have brought him in. Is this guy the Forrest Gump of podcasts? Yes. Yes. Yes, I know who this guy is. He's been everywhere. And we've interviewed him on Radio Futur. He's a great guy right really cool dude so so this this period when you two live

together in sydney would this have been limo you were on triple m i had been sacked okay so i wasn't working okay right well i wasn't working radio yeah i was doing stand-up and just hanging out in bondi yep and it was great and i used used to spend every day looking at all the other people wandering in Bondi going, what do you people do? Yeah. And I was one of them. You were doing before the game though, weren't you? I was doing before the game.

You were flying to Melbourne. I was flying down to Melbourne doing before the game. Yeah. And I was doing Triple J Drive. Right. Okay. Because I was going to say, was there a sweet spot in there where it was Triple M and Triple J in the one apartment?

God, imagine. Yeah. No, there was no. Oh, and Triple J in the one apartment? God, imagine. Yeah, no, there was no. Oh, actually, no, there wasn't. Well, maybe. There wasn't because I lost my job. And my girlfriend. At the same time. That's right.

Were they linked? She was in my contract. Yeah. Sorry, you've got to get rid of her. Was your girlfriend a nicey cold can of Coke? Tears for fears bomber jacket. So you guys were just talking before about how you went on holiday to Fiji together. Yeah, so we...

The most romantic holiday. It was beautiful. Was that when we were living together Or was that before No I think No no no You were doing I was doing Nova Brekkie And you were down here doing

You'd just started Gold I think Oh right okay That's right I was in Melbourne You were in Melbourne Yeah Because that is full on If you're living together And holiday together

That's It's a beautiful romance Yeah Yeah We went to Fiji So we thought Oh that'd be a bit of fun One flight It's a beautiful romance. Yeah. We went to Fiji. So we thought, oh, that'd be a bit of fun. One flight. It's nice and close.

Bali's a bit hacky. And we got to Fiji. Where did you get married again? I've turned around on Bali. Bali. I've always said that about you. Hack wedding. Heard it all before I got married in Bali

So we went to Fiji And there is Fuck all to do in Fiji So we passed the time By doing what During the day We pool crawl We pool crawl

So there's all these hotels On this strip and we'd go and sneak into the hotel and have a swim. Yeah. And that was the end of it. That was the whole thing. And then go to the next hotel and have a swim in that pool. And how many did you clock? Did you –

We did them all. No, we do them all on a day. We did them all. But, of course, we had invented a world pool crawling championship. That's right. And we were competing in the world championship at the time. And there were lots of made-up competitors around us. Oh, right.

Who were challenging for the title. That's right. The Finnish competitor was always. It was the type of thing you do with your four-year-old son. Yes. We were doing it with each other. I was going to say I would assume that there's a lot of swim-up bars in these pools which may have concocted this idea.

Yes. Yeah, that helped. But I remember when we said it wasn't until, I don't know where we were, but Dave Hughes was there and we said, oh, yeah, we're going to go to Fiji. And he just went, sorry? He just assumed he'd misheard. And I don't know, Fiji, he goes, it's a bit much. And that was the end of the thing.

I thought you meant you turn up to Fiji and Husey's just there, like just happens to be in Fiji when you're there. Yeah, just saying good on you to people. Husey. I was, speaking of bumming into Husey overseas, BG when you're there. Yeah, just saying good on you to people. Hughsy. I was – speaking of bumming into Hughsy overseas, I – What a pro. Yeah. Segway. I was in New York years ago and Hughsy was there at the same time.

This is Christmas 2007. Do you ever go anywhere without one of your mates or – Never. I hate myself. That would be a short shit all day if I went by myself. Actually, didn't Tommy Little recently did that, didn't he? He went to like a meditation retreat in Thailand and lasted like literally a day. Like he was telling me about it before he went.

I was like, I actually would love to do something like that. It sounds amazing. And then the next day he's on Facebook going, is anyone on this island? Was he expecting something else out of the meditation retreat? I don't know. I think, you know, meditation's a lot of, yeah, it's just all, it's all the self.

It's all right in there. I think he looked within and went, fuck, I've got to get out of here. There's no all the self. It's all right in there. I think you looked within and went, fuck, I've got to get out of here. There's no happy endings there. You need to get out. So I'm walking along with Fusey and we're walking through Times Square and if you've been to New York. Because you like to get off the beaten track. You hate the touristy stuff.

Bali's a bit hacked. So when I decide to get away, I get the most famous comedian in Australia and walk through Times Square. I just go and check out the M&M's store. So we walk through Times Square. And you know, Dool's, how they have people spruiking heaps of shit in Times Square, like theatre shows, whatever. That's what Dool's moved over there to do.

That's what I'm doing. Haven't you seen me with the Hamilton sandwich board? All the Mike Pence fans throwing tomatoes at you. Yeah, it's getting tough. So we're walking through and this guy comes up to us and says, hey, fellas, you guys into comedy? And we go, oh, yeah, yeah, we're into comedy. He goes, oh, you've got a great show at the comedy strip. And we say, oh, yeah, who's on? He goes, oh, yeah, yeah, we're into comedy. He goes, oh, you've got a great show at the comedy strip.

And we say, oh, yeah, who's on? He goes, oh, you guys are Australian. And we go, yeah, yeah. He goes, oh, man, we've had some great Australian comedians over here. And I go, oh, yeah, who's that? And he goes, oh, just now we had the New York Comedy Festival. We had Carl Barron and we had Dave Hughes. And he's standing right there. And I go, really, you had Dave Hughes. And Hughes is standing right there.

And I go, really, you had Dave Hughes? He goes, yeah. I said, who was better out of Carl Barron and Dave Hughes? And he goes, oh, they're both really good. And I go, make a call. Who was better? You see, Hughes, he really wanted him to answer the question. But he wouldn't.

No, no, they're both really, really good. Yeah. I've copped that as well. I did that walk down Times Square. Carl Chandler But he wouldn't. No, no, they're both really, really good. Yeah. I've copped that as well. I did that walk down Times Square and they – Carl Chandler was here. No, recently. No, they do – yeah, they're like – they're very similar to the Thailand Sproogers.

They just want to – they want to say something that you want to hear. They think that you want to hear. So they hear your – you know, if you walk down to Thailand, they just – they don't even hear you. They just look at what you're wearing and they're like, Australia, Melbourne. Like, they can somehow figure it out. Yeah, it's kangaroo. Kangaroo. Yeah. Thailand they just they don't even hear you they just look at what you're wearing and they're like Australia Melbourne they can somehow figure it out kangaroo

yeah it's like John Edward I'm getting a B yes yes Burwood Burwood yeah yeah yeah

I'm getting a zone one yes I'm getting a you live with family and friends can't pick the money you got but I know who you live with yeah

so that would be great A spruiker that just As you're walking down They just shout your net worth at you That would be amazing I'd buy whatever they got Yeah Yeah

So they did that They did a bit of Heard the accent Oh Dave Hughes comes here Which I always think Is a weird sell Because it's like Oh Dave Hughes comes here

I didn't come to fucking New York Yeah To go and see Dave Hughes Yeah Also Dave Hughes comes here. I didn't come to fucking New York to go and see Dave Hughes. Also, Dave Hughes doesn't drink. I want to get leathered tonight. He's helping me. So he'd looked up the names of Australia. He knew the names of two Australians. Yes.

Clearly hadn't looked at the photos. Yeah, but that's what they would have. They'd have that Rolodex in their head of whatever country you're from. They're like, oh, you're from Finland. Oh, well, Gertie's feast has been here. The world's strongest man. Well, you guys are talking about holidaying in Fiji together. It ties into a little plan that we have in the works on this podcast.

It does tie in very much. Very nice. You like that? So we've launched this plan. This is what we're planning to happen the middle of this year. We are going to finish our run of shows at the Comedy Festival and everything. We're looking at June, July. We are going to have an end of season trip for this podcast.

We're taking the podcast to Thailand. Us and guests and listeners have gotten on board now and want to come with us. We've got so many listeners hit me up especially and go, when, lock in and go, when, lock in a date, we're coming. Last week I had emails from, where was it?

Don't look at me, I don't run your email account. Switzerland and New York. They're sick of Dave Hughes over there, apparently. Hugh's he's tapped out. And to be honest with you, it's a car barren town. And Switzerland,

pocket knives, chocolate, watches. Don't do all your Switzerland gear in case there's a live show on the tour. And Switzerland Pocket knives Chocolate Watches Don't do all your Switzerland gear In case there's a live show On the table No no edgy stuff

We're a bit neutral over In Switzerland So yeah We are By the time this comes out Hopefully we've Just about locked in Dates and whatever

But we're going to Fly some guests over We've got Man We're going to lock in a hotel. You know, another thing – How did you choose Thailand? Have you been to Thailand before?

I've been once or twice. Yeah. What countries were on the short list? No, no. I just never heard of it. Oh, for this thing. Oh, yeah, it was just Thailand. The way you're describing this seriously sounds,

this is going to be placed into evidence. It sounds like a sex tour. We're all persons of interest now. I've got a hotel. There's people coming from all over the world. Yeah, yeah. He just said he was from Switzerland. I didn't know he had a history.

Well, this is the thing. We've now been talking about this a lot on the show and it is a worry that,'ll get over there and just be held in customs and be forced to sit and listen to all the fuck things we've said about this trip before we're allowed into the country. I think I have said this on the show recently, but I've started to say to some people that I think would have the time to come, oh, would you be interested in whatever.

I didn't even say that to Mooney. I just brought up the – I just went, oh, we're thinking about going to Thailand. He's like, what date? I'll be there. And so Mooney – He would sell one of his expensive cars. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So exactly.

The Thailand trip will appear in his wiki work. Yeah, yes. So Mooney's like, oh, yeah, I'll be there. And I'm like, now there's trouble. Now there's potential. Pray for Thailand. Yeah, now there's potential trouble. There is definitely potential trouble.

With the moon, when are you fixing the dates? I think at the moment June. Yeah. We're thinking June at the moment. Over how many days? 87. Oh, I'm moving then. And whereabouts in Thailand?

Koh Samui. In Koh Samui? Yes. Because this is literally like I figure the way it is, like we could go to Phuket, we could go whatever, but I've been to Samui heaps of times. So at least there's something where we can get there. I can run a tour.

At least, yeah. At the very least, you don't have to have a new experience, which is one of your biggest fears in life. Will the tour involve monkeys and the opportunity to purchase an apartment on the island? Oh! That's funny you say that. This does smack of Chandler Times shit.

That's funny. You said this. That's funny you say that. Getting all your rich showbiz friends to come over. It gets to a week there and it's like, okay, probably time to head back. Carl, you did all the tickets. Can we get the return tickets? Oh, there's no return tickets.

Why is there an overhead projector at the podcast recording? It's funny you say that. Last time I went there, the last time I spent was drunk in a restaurant with a guy trying to sell me an apartment. There we go. Yeah. You know they stop you in the street? Yes. They just ride up next to you?

Yes, on a scooter. On a scooter. And they say, hey, here's an apartment, because that's where I meet all the best real estate agents. Yeah, yeah, yeah. On a fucking scooter, pulling up next to me. See, I bought my house here. I can't afford a car, but I am great at this.

Back home, that would be a paperboy, but over here can't afford a car but I am great at this. Back home that would be a paper boy but over here you're a real estate. Sure. They do it differently. What do you go because you've

I mean this is maybe if we pull this off this is like the most kind of like commercial radio-esque stunt we've ever done. Here's a question. I don't reckon

anyone's done this before because I honestly from all the response we've got I honestly expect between 50 and 100 listeners to be coming along. I was talking to you two days ago and your

estimate was 30 to 50. Now we've jumped up to 100. No, I never said that to you. I've been saying 50 to 100 the whole time. 50 to 100. You're starting to sound like the bloke that wrote Lawrence Mooney's wiki. No, I sound like the bloke on the scooter.

I don't think – is anyone in radio or even TV done that? Well, I mean, Hamish and Andy have done their Caravan of Courage where they had like a huge amount of people with caravans. They had listeners like tagging along? With listeners in caravans. Okay, right. But that's around Australia. That's around Australia. That's around Australia.

Oh, amateurs. And they're actually friends, which is different to what this is. People have done listener trips. I believe at one point Oprah Winfrey brought a bunch of people to Australia. Oh, that's true. That's true. We're Australia's Oprah. Oh, good.

We're Australia's Oprah. Great. All the stores in Thailand are going to have to get rid of their gollywogs when we come past. We're the Oprah and Stedman of podcasting. Do you remember that? When she came here and she was going to do a tour of Block Arcade or something and there's this little knick-knack store that sells gollywogs and they had to get on with it.

In a year that starts with a two, by the way. Yeah, and they had to go in and go, hey, can you just kind of put them out the back while she comes through? So announce the gollywogs. Like, how about get rid of them forever? Or buy them up and put them under people's chairs. You get a gollywog. You get a gollywog.

I can't wait to hear the announcement in Thailand to everyone. You get a wristie. You get a wristie. You get a wristie. I cannot wait to see how many Little Dumb Dumb Club lower back tattoos. Oh, yes. Yes. Yes, definitely.

You've got to get a tattooist to the live. A tattooist. Yeah, I like that. We're going to have to bring one. To the live show. We've got to bring one over from here. I'm not getting a fucking tattoo done over there. Racist.

And I'm not flying a tattooist over. Look at Deslo. Too good for Hep C. Deslo travels with his own tattooist. Actually, him being 5'2", he's a little bit like Tattoo off Fantasy Island. The pain. The pain. You know what I just...

How long do you think it takes to get a pilot's license? Can we, Iron Maiden style, fly our own plane over to Thailand? Yes. Yes. Just a big plane with a hamburger painted on the side of it. Can't you Uber private jets now? Yeah. Or you can in the States.

Is that a move? There's Uber Chopper in summer, which takes people from New York to Montauk, which is the equivalent of flying from, you know, Melbourne to Portsea, Sydney to Palm Beach, Adelaide to anywhere from Adelaide. My dad still has a pilot's licence. Maybe I could get him to give us a lift. Captain Dazzalo. Really?

Does your dad have a pilot's licence? I don't want to travel in a plane with someone who still has a pilot's licence. Like I want it to be an active thing. It's being worked on. I think it's somewhere around here, guys. There shouldn't be a hint of surprise in it when you say, still, because they never expire. I don't want someone grabbing the controls of a plane going, I guess it's like riding a bike.

Lawrence, you own a bike. I see you were doing Movember No the photo was taken in 1974 Hey it can't be any worse than Tiger You've got to give him that There's a place in the movie that I want to go to They've always got the cars going by Doing a bit of fight to Nate

All that sort of stuff The spruiking the cars going by doing a bit of fight to Nate. Oh, yeah, all that stuff. All that sort of stuff. The spruiking the cars and whatever. There's always a place advertised. There's always places advertised. And there's an actual street in Koh Samui called Abandoned Hospital Road. Why do you name a street after that? It becomes easier to just put a street sign up than to do something about the abandoned hospital. It looks like they filmed one of those scary movie, the franchise scary movie, those parody films.

And that was a set and they just never took it down. That was a joke in the background of a film. And it's still there. But to prove its authenticity, I just hope that they've left all the forceps and stuff in the hospital as well. So there's a genuine, people have just walked out and we've left it the way it was. How do I know it's not just an abandoned vet? It's fucking anything. It's important to celebrate your history.

You know, in Hanoi, in Vietnam, they have streets that are named after what is sold on the street. So there's a hat street and all the shops sell hats. There's shoe street. We worked that one out, by the way. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Dumb do you think we are. Hang on, hang on.

We need a whiteboard here. Slow down, Andy. Something got lost in translation between Vietnamese and English, I think. So that's, I guess, to make it, I don't know if that's done to make it easier for tourists. Who want to buy abandoned hospitals? Yeah. So they've stolen the idea from the Vietnamese. We're going to get stopped by a guy on a scooter going Do you want to buy an abandoned hospital?

Do you know what street it's in? You're not going to believe this So the idea is this is like We're going to hit up sponsorship and stuff Part of it will be crowdfunded And so part of it is We're going to go over there and we're going to do stuff We're going to make some content over there

That then you can only get if you've kind of chipped in to make this trip happen. What do you guys – now, if you're using your commercial radio brains, if you guys were involved in this, in radio, what would you be looking to do over there? Over there, I would set up a – I would try and get together some sort of prize, right, and then I'd set up a bingo game. Okay.

So you give everyone a bingo card, but on the bingo card it's of your travelling group. Oh, I like it. You fall off a motorbike, get arrested, get gastro. Buy some headphones that collapse after one day. Rolex that you jump into the pool with. Fake watch. So you do all your classic Thailand

Midlife crisis finally kicks in That's for you Carl Right All that Take a prostitute to a temple Why would you take her on that tour? I'll deal rock Someone claiming they didn't know

The massage was going to end in a wrist I'll deal rock I couldn't believe it They didn't want to be rude. Stop it. I mean, I paid 20 baht for that. You hear the quote, he looked just like a chick. Yeah, yeah.

So it's either bingo or it's some sort of checklist where you check all those things. Scavenger hunt style. Oh, yeah, yeah. Almost scavenger hunt. Although you want to put accidents in there as well, like coming off of the scooter. To reward the disabled. Well, it's nice if something bad happens to someone in the group. At least someone's going to feel, like, okay about it.

Like, they won't be sad. But what about if it's, like, someone's got 12 things knocked off, except for that one they go, oh, fuck, I've got to throw myself off a scooter. Or to win the free T-shirt. Or sabotage, like, cut the... Hey, Carl, why don't you make like a real estate agent get on that scooter?

Well, here's another one. Staying with the bingo theme, this is something my wife and I... Why are you obsessed with bingo all of a sudden? This is something my wife and I played in Bali. You could bogan tattoo bingo. Okay, yeah. So you have a southern cross, like a barbed wire wraparound, an Aussie flag.

A dolphin with big tits. So you come up with the five Aussiest tats you can and you've got to get your people to go out and take photos of themselves with someone who's got that tat and as soon as they complete the set and present it, then they're the first person to win. Something misspelled. Yeah. Something misspelled. And. Something misspelled.

And the challenge is, I mean, anyone, any Aussie abroad with a barbed wire tattoo is not going to be okay with you just snapping a photo of them. So there's that extra element of danger. There's an extra element of danger. And then you have, so let's say you have five and then you have a miscellaneous and that allows people to be creative. I also like the idea that you're doing this in Bali where you're going up going, can I get a photo, mate?

And people are going, that's Limo. Aren't we supposed to ask for photos with you? Limo has fucked this up. In communist Russia, celebrity ask you for photos. I saw you at the comedy strip in New York. I did a corporate recently which was a lunch for this company and it was a big family day at Como Gardens right here in Melbourne. And I got there at one o'clock and I said, what's the formalities?

They said, well, there's a bunch of stuff happening from three. And we'll get you to kind of commentate that and do a bit of whatever, chat to people. I said, what do you want me to do between now and three? They said, just wander around the gardens and just chat to people. Oh, no. And actually, we've got a photographer here. We'll send a photographer. So just walk out of here and just chat to people. Oh, no. And actually we've got a photographer here. We'll send a photographer. So just walk out of here and we'll get photos.

So I was literally going up to people saying, hey, guys, how are you? How's your day going? As they're kind of – they're eating lunch going. Fuck off, Lima. I'm eating. What the fuck is this? The ones who knew who I was were going, well, this is weird.

And the ones who didn't know who I was were going, this is triple is weird. And the ones who didn't know who I was were going, this is triple fucking weird. This is even weirder. That's great. He's getting in the photo. It's like, did you feel like a sexual predator having to introduce yourself to the neighbours? G'day, guys.

Are the mics down at Gold FM? Are you just having to do your show one to one? No. But this speaks to, like, the nice guy reputation that Limo has. Any other comic I can think of that would tell that story where it's like they said to me to just walk around and talk to people for three hours and I told them to get fucked and then I went and sat in the car and listened to music.

And you go, yeah, right, I don't want to cause a fuss. Sure, it'd be nice to meet a few people. I'd sell some tickets. Come on, guys. What's your name? Charlie, you've met a photographer before That's great What do you reckon Dools?

Any ideas for Hairbrained stunts That we can do over there? I do I do like that idea I like the idea of also Maybe getting a boat And just doing some stuff

In international waters Oh that's not bad Oh yeah Like get a monkey I mean there's a Whatever happens Fuck it I do

A monkey knife fight There you go I do want – Whatever happens, fuck it. I do – A monkey knife fight. Yeah. I do want to stay away from the animals thing. I do want to – like people go over there and go, oh, we're going to ride elephants or whatever. It seems sort of not cool. See, any time something comes up as a suggestion that you kind of don't want to do,

you're turning your nose up at it. This isn't – this is a content working trip. This isn't a fully fledged holiday. Okay, you tell me about Thailand. Sure, okay. How many times have you been to Thailand? I think I may have been ten, maybe nine or ten. So enough that you could potentially be on a list.

Like this guy comes and goes all the time. I am legitimately worried that I've got too many stamps on my passport where they're going, this doesn't make sense. Unless you're selling something, this doesn't make sense. And literally, I said this a couple of weeks ago, last time I went, I was getting recognised on the street. I do get recognised more in Thailand than I do in Australia now.

As people are like, oh, that's Carl from Dum Dum or that's Carl from Planet Ease. That's the one we warned you about. That's Serial Pest Chandler. You must be on some kind of like, yeah, like an actual list of like most consecutive trips to Thailand without having like legitimate business to do over there.

Yes. Like most leisure trips. Yes. Look, I think there's a lot of people that do that. But honestly, like I think a lot of people do that and then get into more funnier business than business. You know what I mean? Yes.

Yes. So unless you're there for actual drug dealing or sex, you'd be looking at me going, why the fuck are you here this many times? Because your profession and lifestyle, like most people, even if they go a lot, a lot for them is probably like once a year because they work full time and they only have

like a set amount of time they can take off. And it's like, jeez, I'm here a lot once a year. I mean, this guy's racking up three in a calendar year sometimes. Luckily, Kenny's taken a bit of the heat off. Yes, Troy Kenny. We've got to get Troy Kenny on the show because he has usurped me, I believe, at the moment. He's doing a lot of that.

I met him over there once. But he's almost – isn't he like – he's doing – how do you say it? Muay Thai. Muay Thai. He's doing Muay Thai. So he's kind of – he's sort of legitimised it. He's got a cover. Which is what you're trying to do. Yeah. He's got, how do you say it? Mutai. Mutai. He's doing Mutai. So he's kind of, he's sort of legitimised it. He's got a cover. Which is what you're trying to do.

Yeah. He's got a cover. So this is just so true to my theory that Nick Cody and Kenny will eventually get married. He's now becoming Cody's dream man. Either that or they just somehow walk into each other and become one. Well, I've never seen him in the same room. Ever. Yeah. But you, going back to, in the same room. Ever. Yeah.

But you, going back to, you had your wedding in Bali. Yes. Are you getting married in Thailand? No, but look, this was a consideration at one stage. Within the dark days of my girlfriend begging me to marry her, she… Dark days! It went for years. Yeah, it did get to a point

Where she was like Look I You know Any preconceived notion I have How my wedding Is going to turn up I don't care anymore

I've lost the will Great That's a good starting point Yeah That was part of the proposal So I've lost the will to live So

No but she was like Look You know You love going to Thailand Why don't we have the In her head It was like a way Of encouraging me, you love going to Thailand. Why don't we have the – in her head, it was like a way of encouraging me to fast forward and make it happen. Why don't we have the wedding in Thailand?

And like you had your wedding in Bali, which is great because – but here's the thing. Your wedding in Bali, you're at a level where your guests are like, you know, Hughsey and Will Anderson. It's like, yeah, easy. Let's go to Bali. My mates are fucking Dassault and Dilrub. I'm not going to have a wedding in Zone 2.

They won't be able to afford to get out there. Let alone fucking Thailand. Well, I'll just make it a Thai-themed wedding. Yes. That's great. I feel like subconsciously at least that wedding of Limo has kind of planted the seed for this little idea, this podcast trip idea.

Oh, maybe. Subconsciously. But no, I did trip idea. Oh, maybe, subconsciously. But no, I did love it. Like, you just got all your mates over in Bali. It was good. We had a good – we had about 75 there in the end. Oh. It was great.

We'll beat that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, and I didn't – we didn't expect that many to come. Yeah, right. To be honest with you. Right. What was the numbers invited versus the turnout? Did you actually invite them or did you just go over for a wedding and most Australians were already there already?

And you're like, oh, you might as well come. Actually, Cody was in Bali at the same time. We went down to Cootah Beach, threw a net and just gathered in and sent the Australians. We probably invited 100. Okay, that's a good result. Yeah. For 75, I reckon. It's a great result.

So it was pretty fun and you should do, one of the great things we did was had the speeches were open mic. Fuck. I will not be letting that happen. You should do open mic. It was great. letting that happen you really you should do open mic it was great

because comedians are so competitive so it started with my mate Hawley who was sort of joint best man

with Hammo and then Hammo so Hawley was a non-comedian then Hammo spoke Justin Hamilton

and then Rosie spoke who was the MC Adam Rosenbach and then Rosie throws it open of course so Will gets up and then you see Husey going,

I fucking don't know, I have to get up. You just can't let it go. He doesn't want Carl Barron getting up and being better. So then Will and then – so Husey gets up and then you see Malloy go, I fucking don't know, I have to get up. Can I just say, good gig. This is a gala. Hamilton, Rosie, Malloy.

And then Gatesy got up and sung a Cheap Tricks song. Stephen Gates from Tripod. Nice. So that was that. So you never know what's going to happen. You should totally do an open mic. So this guy is – Provided you get clearance on it.

Provided I have good enough guests. This guy's getting married soon and we were talking about this last week on the show. He's quite worried about – I think you're a little concerned about the moment in the speeches where you have to get up in front of largely a comedian audience and be quite earnest and sincere. I don't think I'm worried about it. I think it'll be fun. But I will definitely be trying to be funny within it. Yes.

Like I said, it's the – and you would have done this. It's the best gig of your life. Yeah, without a doubt. Yeah. Like making people laugh at your wedding. They just have to. I mean, if you die at your own wedding. Yes. Exactly.

Divorce her and have another crack in the ear. Seriously, put the cue in the rack. You are dumb. Bad room. Exactly. Divorce her and have another crack in her ear. Put the cue in the rack. You are dumb. Bad room. Yeah. Who invited these fuckers? Come on, guys. Cheer up.

I will say this whole Thailand trip, the one thing, my big concern about it is the listeners coming along. Yeah. I know. And you have stressed this thing. I'd like to live in an idealistic world where I think everyone who listens to this show is chill it'll just be a nice time but the but the but the bigger the numbers get the bigger the guest list gets the more i think i'm gonna need to insist on a personal background check on everyone that comes along

i won't make it through security yeah don't yeah don't exclude too many you're gonna need one as a co-host yeah i don't know what do you guys think going to need one as a co-host. Yeah, I don't know. What do you guys think about that? I mean, that's – The idea is that we're all staying in the same hotel as well. I mean – I hate to, you know, be a bummer about things, but do you have insurance issues if everyone's travelling there for your event?

Ooh. I'm editing this out. Yeah. Well, it's an official event, obviously. They don't have to come to our thing. They can just be having their separate holiday and we just happen to be there. I can tell you from...

Thailand aren't really sticklers when it comes to OH&M. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, I've seen enough bamboo scaffolding. Do you guys have ducks a cover over here? Top of the list. You know, they're Buddhists. Yeah. Well, you know what?

When your time comes, your time comes. Hey. Is that the official statement from the insurance company? I've done a lot of radio events with the listeners, a lot over the years. And I can tell you that what you imagine in your head never really works out to the reality. So I'm imagining the worst scum of all time.

Okay. It's worse than that. Thanks again for listening, by the way. And you'll always get, If you get more than 50 You're going to have My prediction is one or two Minimum Who are going to cause you some issues

Especially the kind of person That wants to go to Thailand To follow a podcast But having said that Look You say there might be A bit of an issue One in 50

But Just remember We're in Thailand And everyone's drinking all day So it'll probably be less than that Surely The best one of those Surely that'll calm them down 1950. But just remember, we're in Thailand and everyone's drinking all day. So it'd probably be less than that, surely. The best one of those. Surely that'll calm them down.

My favourite one of those, you know, it can be a bit tough with the listeners was, and I hope he doesn't mind me telling this, so it was Husey. And it was after the shocking bushfires at King Lake. And that happened over summer. So then all the radio shows kind of went back. and there was this real pull, particularly in Melbourne, over what you were doing. So people didn't really know what to do. So what they did is they, Nova Breakfast,

so it was Husey and Kate, did an OB from the hospital. Right. Up at King Lake. No, here in Melbourne. Oh, right. where there are a lot of victims and stuff. I remember that. And they donated a fair whack of cash to it but they did this OB. That's right. Outside broadcast.

Outside broadcast. And so Husey was sitting there between songs and they'd just set up a desk and it was kind of, you know, they were trying to be respectful and prank calling the hospital. Prank calling the hospital. Prank calling the hospital that they're in. A lot of work. But people were kind of coming up and saying g'day and hi, here's Ian, thanks for this.

And anyway, this bloke comes up and what happens is this idea that, well, when the song's on, you're just sitting down quietly having a cup of tea talking about the football result. It's not true. You've got shit to do and you're trying to figure out what's happening next. Are we doing callers? And then you've got an outside broadcast,

so you're in a different place. So you're kind of concentrating. But then you've got victims of this thing, so you obviously want to give them as much time as you can. And this bloke comes up and he's in the hospital gown and he goes, hey, Hughesy. And Hughesy goes, oh, g'day, mate. How are you?

He goes, oh, mate, I've been better. He goes, oh, g'day, mate. How are you? He goes, oh, mate, I've been better. He goes, yeah, you're doing it tough. He goes, yeah, yeah, I'm doing it tough, mate. He goes, oh, well, you'll get through it. He goes, yeah. And Hughsy said, so whereabouts are you from? And the bloke goes, Fitzroy. Hughsy goes, oh, do you have a place in King Lake?

And he goes, nah, nah, me girlfriend stabbed me. This bloke had walked up from another part of the hospital to see what was going on. He walked in off the street. He thought Husey was a doctor. Oh, finally, someone to look at the wound. He'd been stabbed by his girlfriend with a screwdriver or something. Oh, wow.

Oh, man. And then Husey's breakfast radio brain kicks in and goes, righto, fucking call in topic. What instrument has your girlfriend stabbed you with? What's the best part of the body your girlfriend stabbed you with? Have you been stabbed by something from a toolbox? Well, look, you know, so if you are interested in the Thailand trip, there's plenty of you.

We'll be putting out something very soon. So keep an eye on the social medias. We'll be updating you on the show as well. Are you going to try and get everyone on the same flight or are you just saying get your own way over there? We'll meet you at… No, that's all… We'll meet you at the front of McDonald's.

How's that going to work out? That's what we might do and we'll meet you in town. We'll check into a McDonald's And you can figure out where it is We'll be the ones with the fake beats around our necks No, that is a good question Oh, is it? We're back on We're back

No, I am getting a quote for Like one flight The only thing is I'm a little bit worried like Das always about the whole trip. I'm more worried about that one flight where we all get on like a flight together, like 50, 100 of us, whatever, on one flight and just 100 of our idiots in the air at the same time. Yeah.

That's one of those ones where you see it on the news. Yeah, there was a Just Stuff flight turned around. Yeah. Not to be a prick. Three hours into the trip. Not to be a prick. I'm on a plane. I want to switch off and watch Red Dog

I don't want to be fucking hassled by listeners yeah there's a yeah there'll be mobile phone footage of your totally

someone making an announcement yeah yeah that kind of stuff yeah oh yeah so that I am that'll all be coming in the next couple of weeks

I'm trying to get hotel deals I'm trying to get flight deals so that's all you're planning this way more than your wedding. Fuck.

I haven't even thought about that. To be fair, this was on the boil before the engagement happened. So this has to take precedence. And this is the love of my life, Thailand. But, hey, speaking of all these trips overseas, I did read the paper this morning. There was a bit of a little thing in the gossip column today. He's brought in a prop.

Yeah, I've got a prop. The carrot top of podcasts. So, as we all know, I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here is happening soon on Channel 10, and there's been a bit of speculation as to who's going to be on it. Scuttlebutt. Quote, the show's fans have guessed the comedian, TV and radio presenter that are on the show could be...

Limo. What do you say to that, Scuttlebutt? What do you say to that, Scuttlebutt, Limo? Can I have a look at that? It's right there. You don't believe me? You think I'm making fun of that, champ? I've got to put my bloody glasses on.

Hang on. I'll get my specs. Hey, I just read it to you. They're 3D glasses from Avatar. All right, it could be. All right. There we go. Why don't those glasses have the I'm a celebrity,

get me out of here logo on the side of them? Why are they night vision jungle goggles? Why are you here in safari for teens? Yeah, I wonder why you had all those questions about malaria shots before the show. I noticed a lifetime supply of Aragard. I'm very conscious about not being asked to eat cockroaches. If you want to warm up, you can eat it out of the bin. There's plenty of shit in there, if you like.

Oh, you've bought a bin. That's interesting. And you're shitting in it. That's weird. I'm just warming up for Thailand. Yeah, okay. Gee, not much to say about it. No, no, it's not me. It's very weird.

That's not me. Well, that's me in the story. Well, that is classic what someone who is going would say. It's the first thing they'd say. Yeah, exactly. Okay, what's me? Confirmation, ladies and gentlemen. Is that what I'm going to be naming our Thailand trip at the end of it?

I'm a D-grade celebrity. Get me the fuck out of here. Yes, yes, yes. After a week with our listeners. You should set those types of challenges, the I'm a celebrity challenges for your listeners. Not bad, not bad. That is good.

That's actually not a bad idea. The listeners should have to do stuff while they're there as well. Yeah, let's do it. That's a real way of kind of vetting out the riffraff, I think. Well, it's always fun to do something with a hot chilli as well. That's a classic. Oh, yes. Oh, man, we're going to turn into Hamish and Andy, hopefully.

No, no jungle for me. No jungle. So this story is like, what was it, like people on, fans of the show have guessed that it's Limo. Based on what? Well, because apparently it is. Because what they've been doing on the Instagram is they've been saying it's. It's Limo.

For example. Hang on, which Limo? Yeah. So that one, the clue is a comedian who's also a TV and radio presenter. So every comedian in Australia. And then they've said who do you think it is on their Instagram? So people have guessed on their Insta. What are the other guesses?

Well, I mean, to list all of the people who would fit that would be… Do it now. would be... Do it now. Sampang, Dave Thornton, Emmerichiano, Fifi Box, myself, Scott Dooley. But they weren't named So you're admitting

it could be you? Yeah. Merrick Watts, Roe McManus. Right. Okay. But look, in the next paragraph

they say, speculation suggests the world famous US sitcom star could be Henry the Fonz Winkler You want to get yourself on You could be in the jungle

With the Fonz Mate I'd love a bit of Fonz actually He'd be like Kicking the coconuts Trying to make them work He'd just bang the side of the tree And a coconut would fall Out of his hand

Yes Hey we flew to Sydney To do an episode with the Dollop Maybe we should fly ourselves To the jungle To get the Fonz on the show Oh yeah Are you talking

Yeah Fuck Yeah I mean That's what we should be doing In Thailand I to get the fonts on the shots. Oh, yeah. I think you're talking. Yeah. Fuck. Yeah, I mean, that's what we should be doing in Thailand. I'm a podcaster. Get me out of here. That's our equivalent. That's pretty much what it is. That would be actually like the Thailand Podcast Festival.

Oh, yeah. People would travel for it and you would have no trouble. Greenlight boys would come. Yeah, yeah. Nice. Okay. Cool. 2017, baby.

You and GLB. Like we said, we are literally hitting up people that have been on the show. Mostly people that have got not much going on.

But yeah. My ears are burning. Can you get time off from the flyering job in Times Square? Is that going to be cool? Well, I can't. We've got Chappelle

and Seinfeld playing there. That's Chappelle Corby, yeah? That's right. Ostentatious was here last week. You would have loved it. Oh, did you see? Just a bit of comedy beef.

On Twitter, Jim Jefferies was in Manly. He said, I'm jumping into the Manly boat shed to do 15. And then Ostentatious wrote, try not to do any of my material. Amazing. Amazing. Jim Jefferies does do a bit of how much can a koala bear. It's the name of his next special. Shrugging with an American flag over a koala.

Shall I use a microphone or will a didgeridoo? I had a bit of a beef with Ostentatious on Twitter not long ago. I think everyone's had a beef with Ostentatious. Yeah. You had beef with him. He blocked you and then I went to look at his page and he blocked me, I think just because he'd looked and seen that we're friends. Just by association.

I think he's blocked more people than who actually follow him. Yeah. I did a thing where he went me out of the blue. I don't know him. And so I burnt him probably six times harder. And then he didn't want to fight anymore and it's like

ah and I was like I had the taste I had the taste for blood so I'm like no I want to keep fighting and then he blocked me and I was like

oh Austin you don't know I have seven Twitter accounts so then I just did a lap of all my Twitter accounts and burnt him and stopped Thursday comedy club at Austin Tatious

fuck you how did he come up with this? Add comedy to spleen. How much can a koala bear you cunt? So no, no, no I'm a celebrity.

Can we hold you to that? Can we draw up a contract right now? We've got a couple of weeks. By the time this comes out we'll know in a couple of weeks. So we'll know how much of a, this is the polygraph test

right now. So it's, I think it's about two weeks or something, isn't it? Ohgraph test right now. So it's, I think it's about two weeks or something, isn't it? Oh, is it? Is it? No, I think it's

about two weeks. Do you know this? If someone's not doing it, you know a hell of a lot about it. You've got their Instagram account.

Oh, I don't know what date it is. I've got jungle fever. Whoops. Wait, let me look up the schedules for who's on the project

over the next couple of months. See if there's any black spots in there. Actually, I have to get going because I have to get some shots.

The travel doctor. Oh, you mean tequila, obviously. Actually, I have to get going because I have to get some shots. The travel doctor. Oh, you mean tequila, obviously. Yes, tequila. Tequila shots. I like Doolz. We should brand the trip in some way. We've been loosely saying end of season trip. Should it be I'm a podcaster, get me the fuck out of here?

Yeah, I like it. I like the idea of starting the Thailand Podcast Festival and it's literally just us. Yes. That's all it is. It's like to hear Meredith was just like one band playing and like 20 mates just hanging out on the farm. Yes.

That can be it. Let's get it going. And do it as a present. The Little Dum Dum Club presents. The Little Dum Dum Club presents the Thailand Podcast Festival featuring the Little Dum Dum Club. Oh, yeah. I like that.

Catchy. With support from the Little Dum Dum Club. All right. Yeah, that's it. I like that. Catchy. With support from the Little Dum Dum Club. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right. Yeah, that's it. All right. I'll get the branding done. We'll get all these deals, this package deal done. We'll get some guests confirmed.

Yeah, and it goes without saying, guys, like, you know, big aims. But as with everyone who's been on the show while we've been talking about this, if you are free and you would like to come, you are more than welcome. Yeah. There are a certain amount of people, comics, that do actually listen to our show. Most comics would never listen

to any podcast. Yeah. There are certain comedians that do listen. Limo, you texted me from Fiji saying congratulations because you were in Fiji

listening to the podcast. I was actually, I was in Tahiti. Oh, Tahiti. Listening to the podcast, just chilling by the pool. Fiji is our place. Right, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I don't know. It felt dirty doing Fiji with my wife. We made a promise. So I'm sitting by the pool. I thought I'll just take a little dum-dum on day one of my holiday. And then lo and behold, there's a bloody, you announce the engagement. Big bombshell. So I text you and it was a funny time because I text you from Tahiti and you were about to go on stage.

You said, they're about to tear me a new one on stage. Wish me luck or something like that. Yeah, yeah. And then you did the live podcast. The live one, yes. The European. Right, right. Yes, exactly.

Well, Limo, yeah, if you want to come join us in Thailand, you can come with your new pinhead after you get Zika over in the jungle. So that'll be cool. You can debut your tiny little head for the first time. Featuring the shrunken head of TV's William. I tell you what, my head would have to do a lot of shrinking to get down to the normal size. I've got an enormous fucking box.

I'm a celebrity, make my head smaller. What an invite. Come over to Thailand and bring your tiny little pinhead with you. And that's someone who's five foot two saying that. I would bloody love to. Just a question of... A proper professional career holding you back. It's annoying.

I'll ask if I can get some time off work. Make a prediction now, Carl. Who do you think? Broadcast. I'll broadcast from Thailand. Oh, yes. From the Thailand Podcast Festival. We happen to know the directors of the podcast festival over there,

so we can maybe see if we can get you on the bill. It's a special request from the directors. You show podcasts, right? Yeah, you put up a podcast for the show, so technically we could slot you in. Isn't one of the directors of that thing like a shady guy that's always going to Thailand? Like for no reason whatsoever? I think I read that somewhere.

On the I'm a celebrity, get me out of here Instagram. Which podcast director could be making his way to that? I think you read it on Thailand WikiWorth. Now I'm picturing it. Perfect English though, the Thailand WikiWorth. He owns two expensive scooters. I'm picturing in my head Denim Hitchcock from Channel 7 yelling through a closed door,

it's not your first trip to Thailand, is it, Carl? Get out of the abandoned hospital, Mr Channel. All right, guys, we've got to wrap it up there for another week on the Little Dumb Dumb Club. Limo and Doolz, thank you so much for joining us. Thank you, guys. Limo, Gold FM, I think you'll be back on the air

by the time this comes out. Yeah, we're back on the 23rd of January and touring as well. Perth. Perth, if I haven't already done it. The show's called The Family Lifeboat.

So I'm doing Perth, I'm doing Adelaide, I'm doing Brisbane, doing Melbourne and I'm doing Sydney. Great. So get involved. Limo.com.au?

It's not functioning at the moment. Go to comedy.com.au and look for my link there. Go to analdesires.tumblr.com. For some reason, for some reason, all my dates are there. Dools, what have you got? You'll be back in the States. Back in the States. Look out for me covering the inauguration of Donald Trump.

Oh, nice. You're going over for that. For the project? Well, not for the project, inauguration of Donald Trump. Oh, nice. You're performing there? Great. Yeah, going over for that. For the project? Well, not for the project, for Convicts. You're performing there? Great. I'm doing...

I know he's type 5. I know he's that type of getting people. You're doing Star Spangled Banner. I'm doing Star Spangled Banner. It's me, Kid Rock, and the fourth runner-up from 2008, The Voice. It's going to be fun. Because you do... Very quickly, you do live in New York now,

which I think is an awesome thing. We've all seen the movies of New York and you have that idea of people, crazy people walking down the street just yelling crazy stuff out of their minds or whatever. And apart from Ronnie Chang, what is everyone else like? The only

contact I have with Ronnie is Scott, can you play basketball tonight? Do The is, Scott, can you play basketball tonight? Yeah. And I'll say... Do the voice. Scott, can you play basketball tonight? Hey, Scott. Scott, you play basketball tonight?

Hey, Scott. Hey, Scott. Can you play basketball? Chelsea Pierce. That's it. Thanks, Ronnie. Yeah, so Ronnie Chang is there. So Ronnie Chang and Dave Hughes.

It's the New York Comedy Festival. It's the New York Comedy Festival it's the New York Comedy Festival Cal Barron sometimes as well guys we've got all our live dates and stuff on the website

we've got Adelaide Brisbane Melbourne heaps of huge live shows coming up which you heard about at the start of the episode we've got our t-shirts and everything

we've got our solo shows we've got our solo shows as well during the Melbourne International Comedy Festival littledumbdumbclub.com

for all that information and of course get on the social medias to find out exactly the details of this Thailand trip. Hopefully, by the time this is out, really hopefully it'll be either out or it'll be very, very close to being out. Yes, yes.

Guys, thanks so much for listening and we'll see you next time. See you, mates!