The Little Dum Dum Club with Tommy & Karl - 338 - Live! Daniel Sloss, Becky Lucas & Nick Cody

Episode Date: March 29, 2017

Podcast First Class, Young Henrys and Karl's Children.Recorded LIVE at Heya Bar in Brisbane on March 18, 2017.  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Today on the Little Dumb Dumb Club, the second of our live episodes from Brisbane with guests Nick Cody, Daniel Sloss and Becky Lucas. But first we have some stuff we have to tell you about. If you're listening to this and you're thinking, boy howdy, listen to all those people in that room having fun, enjoying all those visual references that make next to no sense on the audio recording of this podcast. I wish I could be involved in some way. Bear with it. Bear with this OX episode. Is it a bit like that? There's a bit of that. I haven't listened back yet, but I suspect that it's going to be a very

tough afternoon in the edit suite for me. Or maybe I should just leave it all as is. Who knows? I don't know what people prefer. I mean, I kind of feel like I should do the people listening a favour and cut out big chunks of the visual stuff. But, you know, to be quite blunt, fuck them. They didn't fly to Brisbane and come along.

Why should I take more time out of my schedule to help their lives for not doing the right thing? You know what? Kids out there, use your imagination. Oh, yes. There's a little bit in there like we try our very best to sort of explain everything and talk about what's going on visually

in the room, but yeah, sometimes it gets away from us a little bit. So bear with us. It was a very, very, very fun show. Well, what if I do this? What if I don't edit any of the visual stuff out and then people listening can message us and let us know what they think was going on? No, just edit it. Easy for you to say.

Yes. You don't have to get out the old – you don't have to get the two reels side by side And get out the old scissors and the sticky tape Doing a bit of splicing Yes Yeah And of course we should mention that this week The Little Dumb Dumb Club is brought to you

By friend of the show Anne Edmonds Oh she's doing a live comedy festival show Not a pre-recorded one Yeah That's the thing A lot of these things you read in the guide Well actually there are a couple of shows like that this year.

Old Daniel Kitson's come out here to just show a movie. You know what? Yeah. Like, if you go to the cinema, they're all pre-recorded shows. That's not bad. Yeah. They're not live. I reckon next year my show might be me just showing video of me and my parents in Fiji

when I was 12. Really? How about that? Just an hour of highlights of our trip. Yeah. What are you going to call it? Me and my parents in Fiji. Nah.

Give it something good. Come on. Oh are you going to call it? Me and my parents in Fiji. No, give it something good. Come on. What would you call it? You're good at this sort of stuff. World's best and greatest. Fiji holiday. So, yeah, Anne Edmonds in her new show, No Offence, None Taken. It is on at the Victoria Hotel, 7pm.

She's one of the favourites of Little Dum Dum Club, of ours and of the listeners. You guys love her. Everyone's all... Whenever we put a shout-out saying, oh, what should we do? It's like, Edo, we love Edo. We barely need to do this ad because I'm sure people already had tickets anyway.

The people love Edo. And you and I, both through running comedy gigs throughout the year, over the last few months, we've seen Edo popping into trial stuff and her new stuff is, in my opinion, as my mother used to say, bellissimo. As she used to say? Does that mean your mum's dead or she has just stopped using the word

bellissimo? She's not Italian anymore. Oh, really? She married my dad. She had the snip. So, yeah, Edo, go check that out. 7pm, so it's nice and early in the night. So if you're, hey, that's good if you're planning to see a bunch of shows in the night, start off with Edo.

It's good if you want to see both me and you because you can go and see Edo first and then see us. Yeah, absolutely. She's, no, she's, you know, I'm loathe to use this term because I don't like it and I also think it's used I also think it's used wrongly a lot of times with wrong examples but she's got funny bones okay whenever I hear someone

say oh they've got funny bones I'm like nah they're no good but Edo's funny yeah okay great well yeah go check her out

tickets and all that stuff comedy.com.au it starts on the 29th of March no the 30th of March I should say and runs for the month of April at the Victoria Hotel, 7pm. Tickets and all that info, comedy.com.au.

Comedy. So we have, this is it. This is the last episode, if you're listening to this when it comes out. Last episode ever. Ever, yeah. Bye. What are you moving on to, Tommy? Well, once we refund all the tickets that we've sold for Comedy Festival

because we're never doing a show again. No, let's not say any of that stuff. Jesus Christ. No, this is it before our month of shows. During April, the podcast every Sunday afternoon at the European Beer Cafe, 3pm. That's April 2nd, April 9th, April 16th and April 23rd. That is four live podcasts, three guests each. All secret special guests as usual.

We've got some absolute bonzes lined up already. Plus, so that's every Sunday. Plus we've got the roast of Dirk Dreisinger, which is officially sold out. Well, I can't wait to... Oh, what? I was about to say, I can't wait to buy a ticket to that. Oh, well, A, you don't need to. You're on it.

Oh, good point. Well, there barely needs to be a B, but what is it? B. Movie. B. Fuck. Yeah, B, C, point A. Yeah.

There's probably not a B. You're right. Okay. But if there was, let's say I didn't listen to the show. I mean, let's say I didn't co-host the show. Yes. And I'm listening to this going, well, I can't wait to come along. Yes.

What would you have to say to me? Suck shit. You fucked it. And that's, you know, look, you know what? Me saying that it's sold out, it's like that thing where you hang up a dead rabbit on a signpost by the side of the road in the country as a warning to the other rabbits. Like that's a warning to get tickets for all the other shows. That's what that is.

How many times in your life have you done that? Do you have to do that pretty regularly in Maryborough? No. No, I'm scared of dead things. Are you really? Yeah, you've got a real fear of dead animals. Really? Yeah.

It's pretty full on when you see a bit of roadkill on the side of the street. We saw a lot of it on the way up to Canberra last year. Yeah, I hate it. Really? Yeah, I always find it very unusual when I recoil. When I start fucking one. When I recoil because you go, wow, I wasn't scared very unusual when I recoil. When I start fucking walking. When I recoil because you go, wow, I wasn't scared of it when it was alive,

when it could have actually done some damage to me. But now that it's incapable of anything, I'm like, ooh. Yeah, I guess it's a chilling reminder of your own mortality. We're all just foxes running along the highway. Yeah, yeah, I'm scared. So please don't bring any dead animals to the live shows. Oh, well, now you know what's going to fucking happen. It's going to be corpses galore. Rabbits, dogs, cats.

I'd like to think, you know, I know some of our listeners are fucked in the head, but don't bring your dead dog along. There's a listener sitting there listening to this right now, just in a little shed, surrounded, just animals hanging off the ceiling. And this has come up and he's like, finally. Wearing the skin of a dog already. Yes.

He's looking at his season pass ticket and he's gone, great. The perfect thing for me to attend. The new Silence of the Lambs guy, he's down in the pit. Instead of wearing a human skin, he's wearing a cat skin yeah buffalo dill that'd have to be a big suit covered in chicken skin but not for long uh so yeah that is sold out the roast of dill rook jay singer we sold it out we sold out the small room downstairs at the european then we got moved into the uh main room the big room at the european some people are selling out their shows in little clubs at the comedy festival and being moved into

the main room of the town hall. We're selling out shows in a room in a pub and being moved into a slightly bigger room in a pub. Still good. Yeah, we're still selling out. That's fine by me. Yeah, so that is the Good Friday. Good Friday, April the 14th. It's our own little

Good Friday appeal, in a way. Giving to people Much less fortunate With Less fortunate body issues I guess Yeah Rather than just You know sickness

Or anything like that Yeah I guess you know Dil's Dil's Here we go Dil's got stuff wrong with him Yes

Save it Save it Give so he may Not grow anymore So that's going to be great Yeah, to anyone who got a ticket to that Consider yourself lucky And of course

On the last day In the fourth live episode At night We are doing the drunk cast At 11 o'clock Now in its fifth year? Oh, maybe. Yeah.

This might be the fifth. So if you've got – I think the official rule that we've got at the moment is the people who have got season passes get the priority. They're in the first class seats. And then everyone else, fucking good luck. Yeah. And I have seen a couple of people on a certain email thread that I'm very familiar with these days commenting,

saying that they are flying down from interstate for the last weekend. You know, they're wondering does that get, you know, they're worried, they really want to come and it's just, it's too difficult to work out any other kind of conditions. It has to be season pass first, regular tickets after. So all we can say is get there early, park yourself at the venue. If there's no line yet, you know you have a bit of time to go get a beer, get something to eat.

But, yeah, we wish we could make it easy for you guys. We really appreciate people coming in from interstate and everything. But if there was any way of doing it, we would. But it is just – it's way too difficult. I think we'll have to figure out something different next year, I reckon. Yeah. I mean, we'll have to – I don't know. We'll have to just maybe just start charging for it or something.

Stop doing it. Yeah. Stop doing anything. So, on top of that, and of course, on top of all of that, we are doing our new solo shows for 2017. Tommy Dasolo in Dinner for Two, Carl Chandler in World's Best Comedian in the World. It was funny that the word that you almost forgot was the word comedian. Now what am I doing up there again?

Chef? It is a tough question sometimes. Unicycling? It's a bit of juggling. There's certainly a bit of rodeo work going on. Exactly. Yes. Exactly. In the old dickhead circus. So we are doing, what's our dates? April 2 and then April 9 till 23.

Yes, that's it. So every Sunday after the podcast and then the last two weeks right through. Flat out. Monday through to Sunday. Yeah. Wednesdays. Oh, I'm looking forward to those Wednesdays. You know what?

I don't know if you, whether we should be talking about this out loud or figuring it out after the show, but let's do a Westgate Wednesdays deal. Yeah, okay. Because Wednesday is notoriously the hardest day to sell tickets. Yeah, well, we'll say that because I think most people's tickets after Tidehouse Tuesday, Wednesday is the second next cheapest night. Right. So if you're someone who, yeah, it's an option for you to go out midweek or you work a flexible

schedule and you're thinking what night's best to come, for the love of God, come on a Wednesday. You'd be doing – make a night of it on a Wednesday. You'll be doing a lot of comedians a big favour. Yeah. So get along to that, to Westgate Wednesday, because if you don't come, that's what it's named at. We'll be off to the Westgate.

Yeah. So that'll be lots of fun. I, of course, am doing my third run of the heckle show, which means all new material but a different friend of the show, basically, every night coming in to throw shit at me. And sometimes multiple, multiple hecklers as well. I've got a few multiple nights coming up. So that's going to be a lot of fun.

If you've been before, you know what you're in store for. All new jokes but different heckles. Heaps of fun. Some people have been multiple times in the same year because you're going to get a different show so it's going to be very loose and of course um a lot of you guys have already bought tickets to our show straight after the live podcast because you can just stay in the same building and go straight to them so that's certainly a big option for you guys but much appreciated if you come during the week as well yeah do it um so then we have the kosamui international podcast festival coming up after uh april in may the end of may may 31 till june 5 at the ozo chowang samui resort if you book online using the password podcast you get a sweet

sweet sweet discount on that and you've got to go to the official website yes don't go to any middleman um go to the official website because Yes. Don't go to any middleman. Go to the official website because they're the ones. Don't go to Expedia and try and type in podcast. They'll just tell you to get fucked. Exactly. So do that. Use the password.

Getting plenty of feedback of people that have already booked in and gone, I can't believe we're getting such a cheap deal in such a great resort and have upsold and gone into big, you know, lovely suites. So a lot of love coming back from us that way. We are getting – man, those live shows we're going to be doing over there, I'm getting a bit worried. They're going to be pretty fucking big. Yeah.

So there's a lot of people going, booked in already. So thanks to all the people around the world that are coming. Very exciting. It's going to be exciting to meet all you guys from overseas. Yeah, definitely. Big time. And, of course, you can support that. We've got the GoFundMe page.

We are still scrounging all the shekels together to make it work we're flying over guests we're hopefully flying over someone we're putting money towards someone filming it

we need all sorts of funds for that sort of stuff so you guys have chucked in heaps already so thank you very very much the GoFundMe page you can find a link to that at our website

littledumbdumbclub.com if you want to kick in. Of course, once you do that, there are rewards. We're going to be making filming and recording a lot of bonus content. So all of that will be going your way if you chuck in $10 or above. That would be awesome. You are putting in to help us out, so we want to help you out and give you heaps of fun bullshit.

Yeah, great. And also another way you can support it if you're coming or if you're not coming is we've got merch on sale for the Koh Samui Podcast Festival designed by me. We have a singlet and we have a t-shirt, both of which look great. And which we are, by the way, if you've ordered, we should have said this when we put it on sale. It's a pre-order at this point. Yeah.

We are very close to getting them back from the printers. So everyone who's ordered so far, thank you for your patience, but they should be going out pretty soon, right? Pretty much nearly right on when this comes out okay great perfect so look for that

in your mailbox very soon because there's heaps of you who have ordered like we're already starting to look at it going fuck should we print some more but so heaps and heaps

of you guys have ordered which you know apart from supporting the first Koh Samui international podcast festival it's just sweet a sweet product they look good

the singlet with the the beer esque logo that says Dum Dum and then the lovely illustration by yourself of an elephant with me and you riding it. That's not meant to be me and you. Oh, who's that? It's meant to be Sonny and Cher. Oh, really?

Yeah. The amount of times I've mistaken. Me being mistaken for Sonny Bono. Well, yeah, there's a little bit of that, isn't there? Is there? I don't get a lot of sure. Let me look this guy up. Yeah, you look him up.

Go for it. Fill the gap while I look this up. Well, I get a lot of mistaken for sure because a lot of times I'm on a battleship with rubbing a big cannon on my vagina as I'm wearing fishnet stockings. So there's a lot of that. Every time I do that, people walk past and go, where's Sonny? And I'm like, it's not really sure.

Okay, so you think I look like that? Yeah, a little bit. Yeah. Okay, fair enough. The moustache is kind of it. Yeah. Yeah. Well, he was – yeah, that's about it. That's all you need. Great. Well, he, you know, he was a – yeah, that's about it.

That's all you need. Great. So, yeah, get on that merchandise. That's on our website, littledumbdumbclub.com. Thank you to everyone who's bought one so far. We also have to say thank you to the people who are supporting us on Patreon. You can subscribe, patreon.com slash littledumbdumbclub to help keep this show going. We really appreciate it.

You get sweet rewards, $10 or more each month. You get an extra bonus episode of this show. $5 or more, you get a sweet magazine where we write articles and do drawings and guests send us stuff and it always ends up looking really, really great. And for $2 or more, you get your name read out at the start of the program. You get thanked. So here we go. Let's do five.

Quote, unquote, thanked. Yeah. Thank you to Daniel Town. I really thought that was going to be comedian Daniel Town. No. I thought that was going to be him chipping in. I at no stage thought he'd be chipping in. Well, yeah.

I mean, we had him on episode like 19 or something, and I thought maybe this was him trying to get himself back on the show. No. But even if he was kicking in, no chance. Yeah, he should be trying to give us money for the performance he put on in that episode. We're about to – the festival is like a week away from starting. We're about to have to see Daniel most nights of the month.

Now, I wonder if this will get back to him in some capacity. Of course it will. All these little snitches out there listening to this podcast. Someone gets brought up and they can't, they fucking can't wait to get their grubby little fingers onto Twitter or Facebook and go, listen, they were talking about you. Listen to who was bagging you out on the show.

Fucking some little cunts out there have fucking bagged me, have handed me up to people, have dobbed me into people before. Really? Yeah, totally. Right. I do know one big one you've been dobbed into. Right. Yeah, there's been a couple.

A certain boyfriend. Yes, exactly. Who you described as. Don't go on with it. Crusty the Clown if he got hit by a car. Don't go on with it. What? Who?

Crusty the Clown? Yeah, that was easy. Is that what I said? Crusty the Clown if he got hit by a car. I did not say that, did I? The phrase, well, maybe they were separate thoughts, but there's a Krusty the Clown reference and then there was being hit by a car is.

That's so naughty of me. You're a bad little boy. I'm with whoever snitched you out on that one. Oh, fuck. Daniel Town. Daniel Town. Thanks for going to town on our little bank account. Yes, very good.

Thanks, Danny. Oh, now, here's second up. Here's someone – there's been a few of these lately where, you know, sometimes when – you know, we usually read out five names, and the fifth name can sometimes be a bit weird. It just happens to – Not always, but sometimes. Sometimes, sometimes.

It just happens to be – Once in a rare while. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Like maybe once a week. Yes. It just happens to be. Once in a rare while. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Like maybe once a week. Yes. So sometimes they can be a little bit unusual. And some people have been maybe inspired by that or something. I don't know because some.

A few copycat crimes out there. Yeah. A little bit of that. Right. So is this, you know, it's like in a copycat crime, it's like in the movies it's always like some guy thinks he's this big shot killer, but there's one element that's like not as good. Like he hasn't killed them in as creative a fashion.

You're right. And that's how the cops know immediately. It's like this big hallmark isn't there, so good on him. He's having a crack. Exactly. But he will never be the Zodiac. Exactly. Is that what this is?

That's exactly because I've already solved it because they said their name, but then I read their email address and it's not the same. So thank you to Here we go. Thank you to Rip Torn brackets, brackets. Don't read out the email address. No, Rip Torn brackets anus.

So, first of all, you thought it was Rip Torn from the Larry Sanders show and a lot of shows but then it's just a little bit of a joke referring to my torn anus. Hey, let me ask you this. Do you think Rip Torn from the Larry Sanders show and a lot of shows, but then it's just a little bit of a joke referring to my torn anus. Hey, let me ask you this. Do you think Rip Torn is alive or dead? Oh, that's a good one. I think he's alive.

Okay. Because we got into a fight on this, about this, on my other podcast, Filthy Casuals. We were talking about Rip Torn one day. I could have sworn that he was dead. I have a vivid memory of reading a headline article about him being deceased and not true. Alive.

Alive. Alive. I couldn't believe it. I was – I just – I felt like the end of Fight Club, everything I thought was true. Have you seen that theory that people have on the internet? Freddie Godfingered? Yes.

Yes. End of request. No. Have you seen the conspiracy theory that people have on the internet? Freddy got fingered? Yes. Yes. End of request. No, have you seen the conspiracy theory that people have that we've gone off into an alternate universe? We've gone into an alternate reality because there's a few examples like that. The Berenstain Bears? Yeah, yeah.

That sort of thing where it's like literally people have based their idea that they're in a different universe now because they think something was spelled wrong. Yeah. No, I swear that back in the 70s it was spelled like this and now it's not. So this must be a different universe on me. No, you can't spell

because you're a fucking idiot. But that's what I have. I remember a whole day of reading obituaries about Rip Torn and I tell you what, I'm not going to be happy until he finally dies. Only then will I have true peace. There's been a rip and a tear in the universe and you've slid

through into a different part just the one thing the one alternate reality is that riptorn is alive in this universe. Oh I just got why he's called himself riptorn anus that's about you. Yeah I just said that No I know but I don't know I just thought that was him

Just putting in the word Anus to be funny No no I got so distracted By the riptorn element Right Yeah Riptorn

Great actor The great riptorn I know What's he done lately He's 86 I just looked up Coming from a man Who thought he was dead

A month ago What's he done lately Oh I just decompose Apparently No he was great In Larry Sanders and what else? A few other things. Freddy Got Fingered. Freddy Got Fingered, yeah.

He's great in Freddy Got Fingered. He was good. That is a great movie. It is. It's really good. It's funny to me. Now, this is great learning a bit about your taste. Hate the Austin Powers franchise.

Yes. Fan of Freddy Got Fingered. Totally. It's a very underrated movie. Oh, I hate Austin Powers. But Freddy Got Fingered was like I was crying laughing first time I watched that. I feel like when that came out, I honestly felt like I'm the only person in the world who likes this. Yeah.

Well, I was the same with Billy Madison. Oh, really? When that first came out. Did people hate it? Well, no. Just no one knew about it when it first came out. It didn't go to cinemas in Australia. Right.

I saw a clip of it on Letterman one night and went, this looks amazing. And then when it came to Wattle Video in Maryborough. Oh, nice. There was like one copy way down in the bottom corner and I got it and like no one had heard of it in Maryborough and it just, you know, grew as a cult thing as time went by. Let me just quickly ask you this. Does Maryborough still have a video store?

I do not believe so. Because I was staying near a small little town up in the hills for last week, all week and that struck me walking down the street. Sign of the times. No video store. There would have been a time five years ago when a big old Video Easy would have been the bustling

epicentre of that main street and now, nothing. You know what I love is that it's like, this is a really weird, I don't know what this sort of means, but in Chapel Street, there was a blockbuster and it closed down because of, you know, how things have worked out. Replaced by Dimmick's Bookseller.

Yes, I know the one you're talking about. Books. Yes. It's like they whacked in like a huge bit of technology, knocked down all the trees and whatever, and all of a sudden the trees grew back over. Yes, yes. But books are back.

I reckon books are back. Well, actually, no, the stores aren't back. I feel like everyone was getting ready to go to Kindle and iPad and then people have realised nothing beats the feel of a book. Yeah, yeah. So they're back but I think it's more the buying them online. You book depositories in your Amazons. They're back as much as they're ever going to be.

But I think there's still a need for them because you're like gifts, like going and buying someone at the last minute, an auntie, whatever, a book, going into a bookstore last minute, finding something in there. You can't beat it. That's their sole market these days. Also, yeah, who wants to sit on the beach and read a Kindle or sit on the plane and read one? The beach and the plane, the two sandiest environments you can be in.

You don't want to get sunburned on the plane. Thanks, Rip. Or your alternate name, Holly Smith. Smitho. I'm glad she went with Rip Torn Anus. Well, maybe Anus was her maiden name. I don't know. Thank you

to Daniel Yavdoshin. Yavdosh to Daniel Yavdoshin. Yavdoshin. Yavdoshin. Yeah. There's an obvious joke there. Putting some of that dosh into our account. Yes.

Was that the obvious joke? He's putting the dosh out of his name and into our pockets. Nice. Thank you very much, Daniel Yavdoshin. Although this is what I find interesting is that very much, Daniel Yevdoshin. Although this is what I find interesting, is that his name is Daniel Yevdoshin, and then when you check his email account, he's spelt Yevdoshin in there differently.

Ooh. So he can't spell his own name. It's such a weird name. But what is it? Does it look like there's a deliberate, is he taking out some of the vowels or something? Yeah, he spelled his name Y-A-V-D-O-S-H-C-H-I-N. And in his email account, he hasn't got the C in there.

It's Doshin. It's the Dosh-chin. That's great. I'd love to know the story behind that, Daniel. I bet you there's a very interesting one. Couldn't get, you know, didn't want to go Yav Doshin 67. Right. So just went, well, fuck it. If I take a letter out, I'll be the only one.

I'm sure there's a lot of people after Daniel Yevdoshin at fucking whatever it is. Yahoo.co.uk. Yeah. .nz. Well, thanks, Daniel. Thanks, Yavo. Thanks for the dosh. Speaking of complicated last names, thank you to Ken Brown.

I hope I'm pronouncing that properly, both names there. Speaking of ripped torn anus. Yes. Well, it sure is a pleasure to be taken down to Browntown by this upstanding gentleman. Thanks to Mr. Brown for giving us some sweet green. Oh, nice. Nice. Thanks, Ken.

Now, how does he spell his last name in the email address? B-R-O-W-N-E-Y-E. So, yeah. What? S-H-I-T-T-E-R. At oldmail.com. Don't give away his full email account. Jesus.

Thanks, Kenny. Thanks, Kenny. Thanks so much for, again, I'm sure you've copped a lot of that in your school years. Thanks for taking a big old squat over our Patreon and just loosening your bowels right into it. Yeah, thanks for doing a poo, just in general, made of money. Okay, let's do one more. Because that's like my old teacher. I think I've said this before

I had a teacher When they shit money came out I had a teacher That had a I'm sure I've said this before I had a teacher That wrote a book And which was

You know when you're in primary school It's like oh yeah Our teacher wrote a book Wow that's amazing Yeah That's in the shops And He wrote a book called

The Money Eaters And He used to encourage kids to go into the bookshop when there was a bookshop in Maribor, of which there's none anymore. No video library, no bookshop. But for books, people just don't read in Maribor, so they got rid of the bookshop.

Yeah, great. They got rid of the bookshop in 1989. Yeah, yeah, exactly, in the 50s. So he used to encourage kids to do the wrong thing and go into the bookshop and just go, pre-order my book. You don't have to buy it. Just pre-order it so it gets in the shops and they still have to buy it. That's great.

Yeah, like telling kids in grade three to do that. There must be – you just made me realise like there must be because now people can like self-publish e-books and stuff. So there must be a big spike in teachers being able to go, I've written a book, kids. I've got a novel out there. Amazon, digital, you can get it on your kindle for 30 bucks but i feel like i've told this story before on the podcast because it leads up to this which there was this crazy guy that i went to school with it i just it just made me laugh so much he walked into class one day

you know with the teacher was like he was was the substitute teacher. I have heard this, yeah. Yeah, yeah. He just walks in and as soon as the teacher says anything to him, he just goes, yum, yum, yum, money eater, yum. And just pretends to eat money. What's he doing now? That's a good question. Investment banker? He once got locked up. I think he went to the nuthouse at some point

But now I think he's in Queensland Which is probably the right place for him The other nuthouse Yes We love our Brisbane fans Thanks for coming to this episode Alright, let's do one more Oh, okay, we've got time for one more

Alright, one more Thank you to Patreon subscriber. Pretty loopy week already. I can't wait to see what our last name is. Why? Why? No, no. Sorry.

Just go ahead. Okay. All right. All right. Thank you to listener, Patreon subscriber, Tim Gott. Hmm. Yeah. Tim Gott.

Yes. What? Tim. Thanks to Tim Gott. Tim Gott. Yes. What? Tim, thanks to Tim Gott. Tim Gott. Yeah. Thanks, Tim, for putting some money into our account, for subscribing, for supporting the show that you listen to, obviously. I'm trying to think.

To, you know, we really appreciate the money that goes towards, you know, the upkeep of the equipment. We've been doing like… The website that hosts it. We've been doing a lot of… What? Like the last couple of weeks we've kind of read it out in a different way. Which has been…

I've enjoyed the kind of the… It's where we pretend that we're teachers. Right. And we're reading out the role. Yeah. Like I've kind of enjoyed… Like money eater. Yeah.

Like eater money. Right. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. So like, you know where It's been fun to sort of pretend Have a bit of a fantasy element to the podcast So do you want to maybe do that What a fantasy element

Pretending we're teachers Has there ever been role playing like that When you're dressing up as like a school girl You're dressing up as a teacher So your partner They're still them But ingirl, you're dressing up as a teacher. So your partner, they're still them. Yeah. But you're just in the relationship, you're a teacher.

But you're just out the backyard banging dusters against the wall. Coming in covered in chalk going, drop your pants, baby. Yeah, it's fun to us to role play as a profession that a lot of comedians get into after they quit comedy. Oh, right. Yeah. So. Tim Gott. Thanks to Tim Gott.

Do you want to try doing it that way? Oh, okay. All right. Well, I'm going to have to, okay. I'm going to have to gear my brain the other way now. All right. Because we've had, so far we've had Eddie Com. Yep.

Fing Re. And now Tim Gott. Right. Right. Okay. Well, I can try that one. Thank you to. Ah, right. Okay, well, I can try that one. Thank you to – ah, right, okay. Thank you to Gott Tim.

Oh, I get it now. Very good stuff. Absolutely worth the runner. Yep, very good. You know what? I play – I'm still addicted to Championship Manager, the 1992 version where I'm managing four clubs at once on a purely text-based management program.

Yes. I just – all of my managers, I've got four different teams in there and they're all called Tim Gott or Gott Tim. Oh, really? So it's very confusing. I don't know why I didn't name them something differently but they're all called either Tim Gott, Got Tim, Timothy Got or – Well, it's funny you say that because I'm playing the Legend of Zelda

at the moment where you can find horses in the wild and then you can take them to a stable and register them as yours and you get to give the horses a name when you register them. And I have a stable full of horses called Comedy and Riffing and Tim. We're not so different, you and I. Okay, so the live podcast every Sunday starting this weekend, our solo shows, World's Best Comedian in the World and Dinner for Two, my show featuring a whole bunch of new stories and jokes and drawings

that I've been working really hard on and your dickhead idiot circus, the GoFundMe for the Costa Mui International Podcast Festival, the t-shirts for the Costa Mui International Podcast Festival, the Patreon, all of this stuff you can find at your one-stop online portal, www.http://www.littledumbdumbclub.com. Yes, great. I've marked that down. It's a great website. It's gotumbdumbclub.com. Yes, great. I've marked that down.

It's a great website. It's got any questions you have. And, of course, you know, go to the social medias. We are on Instagram. We're on Facebook. We're on Twitter. We've got all – get a part of all that. A lot of you guys chuck in some sweet content and we retweet it and comment on it and all that sort of stuff.

So you guys are always very imaginative and we appreciate the content that you send us. But I think that is all the plugging we need to do this week. Oh, you know what? We never say this, but get on iTunes and give us a rating if you fancy it, like a review. It's always nice. The very occasional times we check the iTunes charts, and we're usually up there.

But the more comments, the way iTunes works is I think the more ratings and the more comments we get, the sort of higher we get. Yeah. So it's nice to see us up there in the top 20. We're doing it. It might help someone else find the show if they're looking and they get any kind of stock in reviews.

Yeah, so go do that and enjoy this episode live from Brisbane with Nick Cody, Daniel Sloss, Becky Lucas and a cameo appearance by a certain eccentric Serbian billionaire. Hey, mate! Welcome into the Little Dum Dum Club for another week. Thank you very much for joining us. My name is Tommy Nassilo. Standing next to me is the other half of the program, Carl Chandler.

G'day, dickheads. Don't say the thing. We are back for more dance-oo. It's going to be great. We didn't get around to the dance-oo in the last episode, but this time we are here yeah hey so if you're listening at home this is the back to back episode

this is part two from last week we've all just had a bit of a break some people that have been only tight enough to buy one ticket have fucked off new people have come in who's the newies? oh fuck you guys are really up for it really really into it.

How come you only come for this one? Why didn't you come for the first one? Sold out. Sold out. If only you'd been in charge of the tickets or something. Fair enough. Well, welcome in. I didn't even flog them for fucking stupid amounts of money.

Alright, shut the fuck up. Now what accent is that? Where are you from? Ah. Now, what accent is that? Where are you from? Ah. Yeah, what he said. Dave Cowan style. Nice. Now, he's a big fan of Dan Su.

McDan Su. So, this is awesome. So, you guys are awesome that come along. The people that listen contribute in different ways. I just got a text literally from Dave Hughes who said, I was just in the ocean in Queensland and someone swam up to me and went, hey, good appearance on the Little Dumb Dumb Club last week. That is fucking awesome.

I like swimming up to him, Poseidon himself, appearing to say, hey, big fan. Yeah, no, just jaw style. Doon and doon and... Hey, dumb cunt, good work. Speaking of the beach, the Thailand, the Koh Samui podcast festival that we are organising that is happening soon.

Now, people have been buying tickets, people have been buying their flights, booking their accommodation to come along with us. That's awesome. Someone emailed during the week to let us know that they're coming. Someone that we know is a listener of the show. Hey, mates, just wanted to check the dates and everything. I really want to be sure that I get the dates right because the Koh Samui Podcast Festival will contain my last drink ever

before I go to rehab in Thailand. Wow, that's awesome that Fiona's coming. We got, you know what, because we've got shirts for sale out the front of this gig. It's a live gig in Brisbane. So we sell a bit of the, we've got shirts for sale out the front of this gig. It's a live gig in Brisbane. So we sell a bit of the... We've got all the different shirts. We've got the burger shirt.

We've got the aware of little Dum Dum Club shirt. We've got the new shirts coming up, the new Thailand shirts, which is me and you riding the elephant. And then the bin tang... I mean the... The Dum Dum... Tim Tang. Yeah, the very original idea of dum-dum singlets.

Yes. So we sold out of our Got Tim shirts, right? So I found we had two left. We had two 5XLs left. That is a funny number. So I found them. And I found out that I'd reserved them for someone who had bought, who'd ordered two 5XL

shirts and they'd never sort of confirmed, like they'd paid for it but they hadn't given me the proper address and I've been emailing them for a fair while going, you've got to tell me where to mail this stuff. You wouldn't want to seem desperate to make a sale or anything. No, no, he's paid already. Oh, right, okay. I'm trying to do the right thing and give him the shirts. Yeah. So it's been going on for like

a year and he still hasn't given me the shirts. Yeah. So it's been going on for like a year. And he still hasn't given me the address. I think he dead. Because, you know, the clues are, it's 5XL. Well. And that's potentially not even, it's like he's ordered two. Yeah, he might be stitching them together.

Exactly, to make it 10XL. Wow. Wow. If you're listening and you're alive... If you ordered two 5XLs at home, please, if you're... Look, if you're still alive, hit me up. If you're not alive, give me a signal.

Shut the fuck up. Give me a signal if you're dead, not if I wish you were dead. Yeah. If that guy's, yeah, if he's listening in the afterlife, maybe appear to us in a vision while we're asleep or something, just to let us know what happened. And if you are in heaven, have you been on the fucking exercise bike? Because...

Well, hey, actually, speaking of money coming in and the Thailand Kosa Mui podcast festival, we need to talk about this. So big development during the week. We've got our GoFundMe up where people can chip in to help us get guests over there and to support the whole thing and we're going to make extra content over there that you will

get. Now someone during the week... Should we start at this bit or should we start at the point before? Oh no, you go. I don't know. This is a convoluted story because, you know... It's getting more convoluted by the second. Well, we have some weird listeners.

Of which some of you are some of them. Yeah. So, yeah, okay. We got a Patreon donation during the week. Yeah, no, GoFundMe donation. For someone chipped in some So, yeah, okay. We got a Patreon donation during the week. Yeah, no, GoFundMe donation. Okay, GoFundMe, yep. For someone chipped in, some absolute madman chipped in, $1,000. Take a fucking good hard look at yourself, you scum rats.

Yeah. Now this, look, that's nice of you to clap, but I don't know if you should. This guy has been hitting me up on the... You run the email account, I run the Twitter account. Clank. Yeah, no big deal. I got some shit going on. What's your email password, by the way? My email password or my Twitter password?

Give out your email password. What? I don't want to do that. To these people, I think that would be cool. How about I give out your email password. What? I don't want to do that. To these people, I think that'd be cool. How about I give out your phone number? Ah! Keep the story going. So, this guy's been hitting me up on Twitter going, I want to sponsor the show,

I want to make a big donation and sponsor the show. I'm like, cool, you can do that. And then he's like, cool, so just do it. And I'm like, yeah, you need to tell me what, you know, who you are and what we're supposed to read out on the show. I'm like, cool, you can do that. And then he's like, cool, so just do it. And I'm like, yeah, you need to tell me what, you know, who you are and what we're supposed to read out on the show. He's like, yeah, yeah, cool, so do it. No, but

you need to tell me what the product is and then we can advertise it. He's like, yeah, yeah, cool. So I'll give you the money, so start now. I'm like, I don't know how to say it again. I don't know how to say it again, but you need to tell me what's going on. And so then he sends me a link of his, he's like, this

is the sponsor, this YouTube channel that I've made. And so I click on the link. There's three fucking garbage clips. One of them, he just remixed a YouTube clip, a YouTube song and he'd go, there you go. I'm like, we're not being sponsored by a fucking YouTube song. What are you, there you go. I'm like, we're not being sponsored by a fucking U2 song.

What are you doing? The channel is like these remixes he's made of popular songs. There's like four or five videos they each have about 80 views and the clip art on all of them is a picture of Paris Hilton. Yes. I guess this is what he wants.

We're just describing the channel. This is all it is. Hit it up. It's great. It's our new sponsor. Yeah. YouTube.com slash Guru1. Yeah.

Cool. Yeah. Money well spent. I think we've done our job. So, look, to put you in the mindset of this guy, man, I fucking... We're sort of scared that he's coming to Koh Samui because he's been...

Here's the last five messages he's sent me with no response from me. Fuck you, Tommy. Clean out your ears. I said, fuck you, Tommy. Fuck Tommy with Carl's dong. Fuck Tommy with Carl's dong. Fuck Carl with Tommy's dong. Equality.

Our new sponsor, everyone. Do you think he'll like this or be unhappy with what we've read out? I sort of think he's fucking crazy. I mean, apart from the fact he gave us $1,000, everything else. Yeah. Isn't that, yeah, what an indictment when giving a podcast $1,000 is the most sane thing that you've done. Yeah, yeah.

Fucking hell. But on top of that, he was also saying to me, so, hurry up and book in Scott Orkerman and Paul F. Tompkins to come to the Coastal Movie Podcast Festival. And I went, well, that's absolutely not happening. And he's like, no, yes, it is. I'm like, it's fucking not.

And then he goes, ask them how much it'll take. And I said, this is how much it'll take. It's not fucking happening. He's like, have you asked them yet? I'm like, I'm not fucking asking those guys. He's like, and then it started with, fuck Tommy with Carl's dong. So anyway, I gave up.

I haven't responded to any of those threatening dong-related threats. So we're not giving up. He just does that and then he goes, oh, he's giving up. Here's a thousand bucks. So guys, yeah, look, we're happy to take a thousand dollars

if you want to insult us. You guys usually do that for free, but we're happy to get the thousand dollars. Sorry if you guys are kind of bored by this, but we sort of have to just relay this. We're under obligation. He paid $1,000 fucking dollars. Yeah.

I don't know what he wants. Is this what he wants? He paid us more than our new sponsors, Young Henry. Well, okay, quickly, we'll get into them in a sec, but I do want to check in something I was talking about a couple of weeks ago on the show. Now, for anyone here who subscribes on Patreon, we send out a bonus episode each month over email.

Now, I've fucked it. I've absolutely fucked it. I've accidentally put everyone's email address in the CC section instead of the BCC section. I mean, I'm so vague sometimes. So I read out a bit of the thread last week's episode. Wouldn't you know it? It's still going to this day. The thread continues on. So

all of a sudden, alright, all of a sudden the other day Joshua Barnes chips in and goes, because this is what will happen. It'll kind of, it'll be very active for a day and then it'll go silent for like two days and then someone will go, so what's everyone up to? And then it's off again

and people are notified, people are writing in and they go, oh what's everyone up to? And then it's off again and people are writing in to go oh I just worked out how to block people on my work email account. Bye cunts. It's our new version of Facebook. Joshua Barnes kicked off the thread recently by saying so who's still waiting for a mention

on the podcast? I've been a paid up Patreon subscriber since day one and still waiting. And then Damien Perkins said, I've gotten two. Sucks to be you. And then Nathan went, well Josh, I'll give you a preview. Josh Barnes. More like Josh is a dumb cunt Barnes.

Ha ha ha. Not bad. Dave chipped in with, these are professional comedians we're talking about. They could at least come up with Joshua Barnes, more like Josh, you are a dumb cunt Barnes. Reid Parker said, lucky

he wasn't joshing about giving us some sweet coin. This stuff writes itself. That's up there with the great Tommy Dasolo. I can't believe I'm helping drag out this deranged chat room. And then Josh himself has come in with, I was expecting some sort of Jimmy Barnes reference.

A working class dumb cunt. Such content for the show here. What do people think of us? Chris Young said, I thought Sadie would be a more likely reference from Carl. It'd remind him of his 20s. Dom Fell said, I assume you sell a guide to being a dumb cunt at your bookstore, Barnes & Noble.

This is all pretty good. And then finally after a day, someone went, don't you fucking idiots have better things to do? So yeah, that's where the thread currently stands. I think we need to say thanks, Josh. Yeah. Thanks, Gmail. Very good. I think we need to say thanks Josh yeah thanks Gmail very good what happened there? you sounded like a robot

very good anecdote moving on I was trying to figure out why you didn't get out on the laugh And then you told the bit at the end where it was like That's nothing and I was like what the fuck did you do that for But I didn't want to neg you I thought You want to neg me?

Are you trying to fuck me now? I said I didn't want to neg you So I said very good thinking that that was a very good thing to say And that just drew more attention Well look we got ourselves out of the bog, didn't we? So, yeah, we should talk a bit more about Young Henrys who have been chipping into the show. Oh, do we want to do this now or with guests?

Oh, I don't know. Oh, why don't we do this bit? Why don't we do the bit there? Fuck, this is good. This is so good. Well, we really should have had that band meeting before. We've got... What about that clip? Why don't we play that clip that we got sent? Oh, yeah, sorry, that's right. So, yeah really should have had that band meeting before. We've got... What about that clip?

Why don't we play that clip that we got sent? Oh, yeah, sorry, that's right. So, yeah, someone in the email thread the other day, someone has made a supercut, if you can get this ready, of every time we've said the word dumb cunt on this show. Someone made this and put it on YouTube. After the last five minutes, they've got some more homework to do. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So, can we give that a play now? If you're listening to this now, you're a dumb cunt. Thank you. We might be dumb-dumbs, but you're a dumb-dumb cunt cunt. Hi, dumb cunt. G'day, dumb cunt. Hi, dumb cunt. Hey, you, man.

He's in Magic Mike, you fucking dumb cunt. Brisbane. The dumb cunt. Hey, dumb cunt. Hey, you man. He's in Magic Mike, you fucking dumb cunt. Brisbane. The dumb cunt. You are the dumb cunt's choice. No, you dumb cunt. See you, dumb cunt. How'd I get this? By not fucking mentioning you dumb cunts in my exams.

What a dumb cunt. I'm being genuine. I'm not trying to be a dumb cunt. You're still a dumb cunt. The text looking at me like That'll do right Like Yeah let's So

This clip This clip goes for Seven and a half minutes Yeah And And we have Sent it to Triple M To try and get a job

So How good's this show now We did our live shows And just us playing recordings Of previous shows We should have left stage And just let it play. Play the whole seven minutes ten times.

Alright, let's get a guest on. Okay, please, do you want to intro this guy? You'd have some stuff to say about this particular guest. Oh, okay, alright, alright. Please, so our first guest, you may know him from being a king in the air, but a dumb cunt on the ground.

Please welcome Nick Cody! Beers are good, aren't they, guys? How good are beers? Young Henry's. The best beer going around. I thought it was a trap when you go into that dark room out there, there's ten slabs of Young Henry's. I felt like it was a cop trying to set up someone for a sting operation. Yeah, especially going to that dark room with Young Henry.

Multiple Young Henry's. I do want to say, before I sit down here, I know I am a king in the air, cunt on the ground, but obviously my virgin velocity status, platinum, means nothing at a podcast. I can bring three of you into the lounge later if you want, if you're at the airport. We'll have toasted ham sangers, it's a good time. But here's the thing, I've accrued a lot of podcast points over the years, a lot of podcast status credits, I was the first guest on.

I think I've been the guest that's appeared on this show the most amount of times. Even with Dilrock, he counts as two appearances per episode. Much like a plane, two seats for one man. And I've decided to cash in my podcast points. I'm not sitting in one of these Povo Economy podcast chairs. Oh, what's this? What have you got? Povo. Povo.

Povo. Povo. And I'll sit closer to the front like you guys never get to. Oh, it's just so nice. It's a comfy leather chair. Is it that good? Yeah, there are extra perks as well.

I get the fanciest drinks. I like young Henrys, but... LAUGHTER LAUGHTER LAUGHTER LAUGHTER LAUGHTER For people at home, I'm the fanciest podcast boy.

Who would have thought that the episode with Frank Woodley on it would be the least visual one we did today? Who? Oh, Mr Cody, please, first class, let us take care. I do love a business class. Thank you for travelling with Dumb Dumb Air today, Mr Cody. Thank you. For people at home, Milan...

Cody's... Don't even bother trying to explain it. Cody's flying Milan Air, and he has just been given a big, I don't know, what, pineapple drink? What is that? With whipped cream on it? Yeah, at Milan Airways when the pilot says, we'll get there in 45 minutes, everybody chants,

prove it, prove it, prove it. Now you've got, now, because, yeah, it's got whipped cream on the top and you've got some of it in your beard. It kind of looks like you've visited the cockpit, if you know what I'm saying. Oh. Every dick pun makes more fake jizz come off my drink. Cody, Cody, for the people at home, is currently cut. Guys, clearly I'm fancy.

I'm a fancy man. It looks... I enjoy fancy things. Because you've got whipped cream all over your jeans now. You've got whipped cream on your jeans, but you're drinking from a pineapple. It looks like your sperm now tastes... Your sperm tastes really good, but it's all over yourself. Sorry, is somebody from Economy talking? I don't hear them.

What movies have you got up there? Yeah. Sorry, we're from Economy. You look really fancy at the moment. I'm a man about town, man about the sky. See, you plebs don't understand. This is how it's meant to be, Drake. You know how we were...

People are being covered in whipped cream in the front row. You know how we were saying we need to do the dum-dum dining experience? I think this is it. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, by the way, can we do a quick visual? There's a young lady that's done a bit of... We're going to doctor him. She's done a bit of... We're going to doctor him.

She's done a bit of dum-dum dress-up. Jump up on the stage. Is there a doctor on board, Milan Air? She's come in as Dr Ramsay. Dr, Dr Ramsay. Oh, okay. Oh, Jesus. Sure.

It's like the Oscars all over again. Now this is podcasting. Although she does look like, has someone hired a stripper? What? Because you've got that big coat on, it just makes me, I don't know. Stop. Just stop. What?

Stop. Oi, Inspector Gadget, get your tits out. Anyone in a big coat. That's a Chandler Meese stripper. It's snowing, you animal. All of a sudden, I look like the dodgy guy. I know.

You fucking weirdo. That's great. We have people... You look like you've already had a lap dance. Oh, okay. This is great. We've got someone cosplaying this show. That's amazing. That's great. And the guy sitting next to you to your left is clearly he's come as me in five years.

That's good. A ghost. Yeah, he doesn't do comedy. It's really hard for me to zing people like this. It's great. I like being high up like this too. This is. I like being I like being I like being high up like this too.

This is a great way of this is a great way of interviewing people. If you could call this an interview. What are you actually drinking? What is that? Man, I don't know.

We Milan picked something. Is this a thing that exists like that you can order off a menu or is it did Milan go

put some shit in a pineapple and then put whipped cream on it? Yeah. Milan bought this from home this is his breakfast smoothie

oh so and by the way Milan's on a health kick so the crazy guy who is now the sponsor of the show that we talked about Milan yeah

no not Milan oh the other one yeah the other crazy person he because he dropped in that grand, that has now officially made you the official second guest

of the Coast of Millie podcast. Big line-up announcement. Oh, no, thank you. No, I'm fine. I've got it under control, man. Audience members are now cleaning up Cody for him. With a loose unit. Oh, yeah, you're bringing along someone else, a plus one.

Yeah, I got married recently, so obviously I'm bringing my dad. Dad's coming. The loose unit. Joffa. I drank that. There wasn't much liquid in there. It's more presentation, wasn't it? It's hard to know where to go from here, isn't it? So you are bringing...

It's hard to know where to go from here, isn't it? What happens now? You are bringing your... Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, fuck.

It's happening again. Yeah. You've got plenty of time. Yeah. Four and a half hours until my show tonight. This will be good. Yeah, well, I've got about an hour until my flight leaves.

So, yeah. It's going to be very interesting. Yeah, this does look gross without holding the drink. It's really... So get your phones out, guys. Get some photos of this. This is really good. How does Sam Simmons do dumb shit like this every day?

Or Dilruch. Second guess? How does Sam Simmons do dumb shit like this every day? Or Dilruch. Second guest? Yeah, let's get our second guest out here. Folks, we've got an international guest on this podcast. Please welcome in Ireland's very own Daniel Sloss. Come to the drunk cast. It's the last I... He always makes me sit in the back. I'm not allowed to join up front.

You look so familiar. Yeah, have you guys met? You guys demanded to be on the same podcast together. No, we're just trying to make your fucking dumb podcast better. Shots fired. Thank you for coming here so close to your...

The pineapple fell off the top. Oh, sorry. Now don't I look silly? Yeah. I don't like cherries. Why don't I do that? I've got a show to do later. Focus, Cody.

No time for cherry eating. By the way, you're in a show now. Oh, yeah. Now, Sloss, we talked about this on the show a couple of weeks ago. At Cody's wedding, you were wearing a kilt. And as is tradition in Ireland, you weren't wearing... I will fucking gut you. I will fucking invite your family around

and gut you in front of them. As a warning. Why would you do his parents a favour? Sorry. Thank you for coming, for still being here despite it being, you know, you still celebrating St Patrick's Day. I will put a shoe through your...

I fucked it, it's gone. His face is getting all hot like a fucking boiled potato. Oh, no, you're right. It is, to be sure, to be sure. I love this new bit. This is great. You were wearing a kilt and I drunkenly

in the middle of the night you were standing I mean you say drunkenly you took a dick pic for me. Yeah. Pretty much. Without my permission I may add. Yeah I was sitting down

you were standing and I was like I wonder if I just like put my phone on selfie camera and just slide it under there put the flash on what kind of shot I'll be able to get.

Yeah you'll see this last next monster. Yes. You've heard a lot about it selfie camera and just slide it under there, put the flash on, what kind of shot I'll be able to get. Yeah, you'll see the Slice-Nest Monster. Yes. You've heard a lot about it but it's not real. On fire. Remember those words. On fire. So I talked about that on the show

a few weeks ago when we were talking about Nick's wedding and I sort of said on the show, hey, if you want to see it, send us an email. I'm sure Sloss won't mind. I'll send it out. Now a few people have actually followed up and messaged us asking to see it. I figured I should check with you first to see if you mind people seeing this photo. Do you mind? Of course. You do mind or you don't mind?

Yeah, it's my dick. They've all seen it. You don't mind? No. it's my dick. No, I'm kidding. Go ahead. They've all said it. You don't mind? No. Okay, well, good, because I printed one out just for the... Oh, Jesus. Hey, at least it's...

Let's take pictures of it. Hey, at least it's not Dan-su. That could be on a fucking Post-it note and it'd still be bigger than all of yours, right? A dick pic on a post-it note. I like how you think that's a roast. Look at your giant dick. Oh, got me.

Well, that's funny because... I'm not even sponsoring the podcast and you're giving me adverts. I just love a dick pic on a post-it note, like, reminder, I've got a cop. Put that on the fridge, don't forget later. Well, someone, yeah, milk, eggs, my huge schlong. That's...

Because I was talking to someone the other day about the roast of Dilruch that we're doing and how I believe you're participating in this. This live show that we're doing at the Festival and I was saying to someone that you were going to be there and this person I was talking to was like, oh, like apparently, apparently, here's something you could get him on.

Apparently he's got a really big dick. So maybe you could bring that up in the roast. Like, yeah, got him. Like, do you understand how this works? Oh, Jack just lost his penis. It's so big. Whenever he's naked and gets an erection, it's like social Bob

standing on a rake. Got him. I like how we've started with the Irish jokes. Someone here in the crowd just started texting me terms from Ireland to use. So, hey, hey Sloss. Blarney Stone.

Hurling. Kiss it. Got him. What else? No, that's it. So who liked seeing that photo before of Sloss' little leprechaun? Did you all enjoy that? Fuck it, hey, little.

Yeah, okay. Sorry, Ben. Yeah, okay. Sorry about that. Oh, jeez. Don't drink it yet. Okay. Yeah, it's a spike. Wow, I never thought I'd hear those words come out of your mouth.

About time we got some bloody cream on this. Alright, Milan. Milana's just brought us drinks with whipped cream on them. Oh, well that's made a mess, hasn't it? Connor's just brought us drinks with whipped cream on them. Oh, well that's made a mess, hasn't it? Let's all, for the rest of this episode, for the love of God, let's all keep one eye on the fact that this does have to be put up as an audio recording.

And make some kind of sense to people at home. No, you have to just start out the podcast by saying, sucked in cunts, you weren't there. I'm really not looking forward to our third guest, Marcel Marceau. Well, should we bring our third guest out? Yeah. Yeah, let's get her out of here. Folks, please welcome into the Little Dumb Dumb Club,

Becky Lucas! Yeah! Brisbane zone. Brisbane zone Brisbane zone I don't think this microphone's on Yeah good You on this one? It is on? Oh you can hear me Oh god Hey guys

Of course comes in, mic doesn't work, has a gimmick Women in comedy What's it like? It's fucking hard man in Mike doesn't work, has a gimmick. Women in comedy. What's it like? It's fucking hard, man. What's your favourite thing about it? All the dick, I guess. No, this is good.

Hey, great English. It's like you're fluent. It's so good. There are very few groups of people you can say that to and there's laughs. Yeah. Slosh, because we've been saying got him a lot and you were part of a lot of the podcasts last year. Yeah.

You were telling me about that last night. Yeah. Cool. The. Cool. The perfect guest. Come on, spin us a yarn. Dip into that pot of gold of yours and just tell us a good one. Yeah. Grab the lucky charms out of your pocket.

Rub them. You'll remember. You Irish cunt. If it rubbed them, you'll remember. You Irish cunt. So these business class drinks are full on. Hurry up, O'Sloss, and tell us a story. Because nobody in the UK listens to this podcast, because why would they? It's very local material

this over in the UK nobody listens to it except for me and one of my friends and we're just because it's always

in my fucking ears I just say got him and then expect like a full response like you say got him here everyone goes

yay you do it at a random party in Scotland they're like who's Tim and I'm like yeah that's the bit! And they're like, oh, I don't know. It's great

how you had to learn this. But also, why are you in Scotland when you're from Ireland? It's a fair question. Hey, he's allowed to travel. Boy, you are copping it on this episode. You really should have brought your four-leaf clover with you. He just ran from Dublin over the rainbow and got to Edinburgh.

I have more Conan appearances than all of you combined. Conan O'Brien, your friend. No, I set him up. Fuck, fuck. Oh, I'm so smug. And I just underarm threw a ball at him. set him up fuck fuck oh I'm so smug and I just underarm threw a ball

at him like a ah shit you're right we are all green with envy you're like so let's make fun of Tommy

for a bit if only if only we had something to work with Yeah, exactly We do have So we have mentioned We do have a new What, partnership?

Not sponsor, but a partnership With Young Henry's The lovely beer maker Dog shit Is it a partnership? Is it a sponsorship? They give you stuff. You don't collaborate on anything, you and young Henry.

Well, it's a blossoming start of it. So hopefully we will. Oh. Hopefully. A little dum-dum lager. Well, you know, they're giving us a bit of... It's got all the hallmarks of a sponsorship. Sri Lankan pale ale.

Not so pale. See, I told you, there's only a certain amount of groups you can make jokes and you'll get laughs. It's weird because it has all the hallmarks of a sponsorship except for the fact that they specifically said to me in an email, please do not say that we are sponsoring you. So, I don't know, it's like that, you know... You're like their side piece.

I'm trying to talk you to a cocktail. I was trying to talk you to a cocktail. You're just trying to drink the microphone and talk... And we don't let people like that up in podcast business class because... It is a bit of that thing where they're sleeping with us but saying, don't tell anyone that, you know, you're my girlfriend or anything. It's a bit... Like what you did for 10 years.

What's he getting? Got him. Finally! Finally! A long year of nothing! The luck of the Irish. Our new game is, where are you from? No, you're from this place.

But we only do it for two places. Sloss thinks he'd won, but he'd actually lost. Ah, Murphy's Law. The law of your people. Yeah! Murphy's law The law of your people Alright so We do have this new relationship With young Henry

Who cares Beg you with a good burn That's some sweet improv The old no end So we They did say That's some sweet impro. The old no end. So we they did say we don't want to officially be known

as a sponsor but we do It is chaos in here at this point. What the fuck is going on? Somebody just neck the rest of

their little hip flask. Cody's a narc everyone. He's a fucking narc. Snitches Hey February Cody snitches get everyone. He's a fucking narc. Cody, snitches get stitches, so I'll fuck you later.

Finally, a spotting of Nessie. Guys, be quiet. I think we're trying to get on with the ad. What ad? So we were... What? We decided... We were told...

We were told we're not the official... You know, they're not official sponsors, but we wanted to do a bit of something with them. Yeah, I mean, you know, you want to talk about them instead of just saying, like, hey, you know, we're drinking it. And, you know, there's a great long tradition of beer ads being very great, especially in this country. So we wanted to do something for them.

We wanted to kind of bring young Henrys into the little dum-dum fold. So we've put together a little something. Are you ready? My mate's had 15 young Henrys and he gets behind the wheel of a car. See you, mate! wheel of a car. See ya mate! Alright, so can we get that music playing? You can get it

saying hey mates. You can get it dialing 0438. You can get it being a disgusting fat fuck. You can get it easier than 0438. You can get it being a disgusting fat fuck. You can get it easier than Fleety gets 20 bucks. You can get it lying on the toilet floor of a gym. You can get it getting Tim. You can get it with blood pouring out of your bum.

You can get it out of the purse of your mum. You can get it after a sweet riff. You can get it if and sweet riff. You can get it if you're sensitive. You can get it as you're on the Westgate and you jump off. You can get it if your name is Jack my tiny dick off. Thanks Jack!

Thanks Jack! You can get it if you're dill rockin' fat. You can get it... Wait, how'd you get that? You can drink one during a Rad Dad. You can drink about ten during a Patreon ad. You can get it avoiding making her Mrs Chandler. Or you can get it after defeating cancer. You can get it flying to Samui.

You can even get it if you love comedy. You can get it enjoying a dinner for two. You can even get it if there's no dance suit. You can get it enjoying a dinner for two. You can even get it if there's no dance suit. You can get it any old how. Matter of fact, I've got him now. Thanks, young Henrys. We did it. Also, by the way, do you have the VB ad up here?

We did it. Also, by the way, do you have the VB ad up here? Becky, we were talking last night, so we were all out with Milan. Oh, yeah. And it ended brutally. You were saying that you saw Milan powerless last year. Oh, yeah, I saw Milan depress once. And it was because someone had... Prove it, prove it, prove Prove it! Prove it!

No, have you ever seen him in the daylight? It's so rare. It is weird. It's fucking rare. No, I saw him depressed once because someone had put a bar tab on so he was rendered incapable of fucking drinking. Yeah, he is. It's a Westworld robot that's trying to get past it.

He shuts down. He shuts like he was just like this. His arms a Westworld robot. It's like trying to get past it. He shuts down. He shuts like he was just like this. Like his arms are hanging beside him. It's his kryptonite. It's a bar tab. Then they set the tabs off and Milan's like, yeah! That fuck! Anyway.

Well, that was good. Yeah. It's not that great. I actually didn't get that fucked up last night. It was weird. You did or didn't? I didn't. Really? Yeah. I's not that great. I actually didn't get that fucked up last night. It was weird. You did or didn't? I didn't. Really?

Yeah. I don't know. I don't know where I'm going with that. Thank you. We should... Sorry? Three standard drinks on a night out always makes for fucking great tales.

And I got a cab because it was easy. It was quarter to nine. Anyway. I had three drinks. Yay. Sloss. What? Let's go back to something you told me last night.

Yeah? How do I lead into this? Glie, glie, glie, glie, glie. Sorry. That was like the Muppets, like the Swedish chef of the Muppets with like a debilitating disease. But that's how you sound.

Like a bird. Fucking hate this podcast. Because you're staying with Cody You guys are like BFFs Is that official? Yeah Got the ankle tattoos

To match it Really? No, dumb cunt That was called a riff Riffing Riffing Carl puts the riff in terrified Becky's still here Riffing, riffing. Carl puts the riff in terrified.

Becky's still here. Fuck you, I don't feel safe. Scared to talk. Beck, because you... Oh no, oh no. Oh, fuck off. All three. All three. Oh my god. Thank you so much.

I'm still not going to fuck you. Prove it. Prove it. Prove it. Guys, thanks for coming to our frat party, by the way. Let the hazing begin. But Becky, we did ask you to be part of the... We've got the Dilruch Jaising and roast coming up.

Oh, yeah, I'm too scared. I don't want to get made fun of. I can only dish it out. Exactly. I find that very funny. You were like, I'll do it, but I only want to dish it out and then leave. Yeah. Of course. I've got two good ones for you already.

I know. You didn't even know I was confirmed on the right. On a whim. Just every night. I'll just say something mean about Becky. That's fair enough. All right, well, let's go back to Sloss, what he said last night. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

So you guys are BFS. you and Cody are very good friends. And you were telling me a story about you guys getting very close. Oh yeah, so last year after the drunk cast, I don't know if it was there, but I kissed Tom Ballard and you kissed Dilruch. Oh, did I? Yeah. You kissed... No, no, no, no, no.

Dilruch was trying to eat Cody. Dislocated his jaw. Like a snake. He had one arm in. We were absolutely fucking smashed afterwards. Milana had been buying drinks there. And there's just one point where it's just me and Cody out on the street. And we're just doing that thing where men can't show affection

to each other but want to so just like shouting but like near each other while smiling yeah shut up cunt we're doing this just talking about how much we like each other but not saying the words and then Looch his fiance at the time

comes out and just goes sometimes I worry that he loves you more than he loves me. And I was like, well, Looch, that's on you because you get to suck his dick. Like, that's an advantage I don't have to make him like me. That's great. I love that you used the term advantage there.

No, I like that he said, oh, you get to do that. I'm forced to do it. Got dick. Sloth's just peering in through the window while it's happening. There goes the luckiest woman in the world. Do you know at his wedding, you know that bit in Love Actually

where Keira Knightley comes, like she wants to find out, like... No. No. No, all right. I have no idea what just happened. You're saying, do you know this bit and people are answering your question.

Oh, right, thank you. Jesus Christ, this fucking podcast. You know that bit where she goes in to find footage of her wedding and then she realises... Now I get the bit. You know that bit where she goes in to find footage of her wedding and then she realises? Now I get the bit. She does that bit where he only films her at the wedding and then she sees.

That's exactly what I did with him at his wedding. Anytime Looch walks into shot, I just pan the camera away. And it's going to be my little wedding gift to them. We're out on the street and we're just at that point and she says this and masculinity kicks in. Dumbass, testosterone, masculinity kicks in. And we're like, we'd be careful each other. I'd kiss you. And I'm like,

well, I'm not scared. I'll do that. So we both jokingly go to kiss. And here's how toxic masculinity works. Once we got here, whoever didn't kiss the other one was gay. That's how dumb male logic is that we're like,

well, I'm not going to move away. And he's like, I'll fucking go. And then that's how we kissed for 20 seconds in front of his fiance. 20 seconds? Yeah. Oh, best of my life. It felt like a lifetime.

Wowee. This episode has everything. So, Becky, we're pretty good friends, yeah? Oh, no. I still don't follow you on Twitter. Well, I do some good work. I know. No, I saw your hundred jokes that you bailed out of How many did you get in?

I thought you got to at least 80 Well no, like 12 of them were jokes Some of them were haikus Well sorry if I don't appeal to your Irish sensibility. It was alright. I try and do a hundred jokes in a day. I got to like... Why not just write two good ones?

Well, where were you a month ago? On Conan. Oh, yeah? What were you wearing? Because you did have a great yeah, you had a good day of it because you subject yourself to this every year and it's, you know, we get a lot of harassment

online at a base level and you put out there every year that you're doing this. Hey, here I am doing 100 jokes on Twitter and then the floodgates open and the fucking rat cunts come out of the woodwork. Yeah. There were some great ones. Some fucking great jokes.

Thank you. I retweeted a bunch. Did you? Yeah, heaps. Oh, thank you. Like five of them. Right. It would have been perfect.

You would have nailed it if you just had another comedian there with you to sort of work through the whole day. I'm going to block you on Twitter as well. Somebody groaned thinking like, Cody's saying a lot of compliments. It is interesting

online because I do that and I go, you know what, I've got such a fragile fucking brain when I'm trying to write a hundred jokes in a day. So I go, I say to everyone, please, don't say, like, this is the one day, don't say any insults to me because I'm trying to think of a hundred jokes. It fucking takes a lot. And someone immediately goes, you're a dumb cunt.

I'm like, fuck! I have to fucking block everyone. And then at the end of the day, all these dumb dumb listeners hit me up and going, how come you, how come you block me? I'm like, I'm trying to work and you literally said kill yourself. If there was any way to write jokes without the internet, then fuck, man. You have to put every thought out there. Stop reading the fucking notifications.

Write your fucking jokes. You know what they're saying? You're checking Twitter. Every time you do it, we're like, five minutes just for me time. Oh, they're all insults. Yeah. I know, I know. I'm working on it.

Anyway. It was... I'm working on it. How many people did you block over the day? Oh, double figures. Amazing. Yeah. But then they all come crawling back

on the dumb dumb account going, hey, Carl, if you're running this, can you please unblock me? I'm like, fuck off. You're done forever. You don't deserve my sweet hundred jokes. Or 70-odd. Prove it.

It's almost like you've cultivated this kind of culture of being mean to each other and then you're surprised. You're saying I can give it but I can't take it back? Yeah, you're like, we're one and the same. That's fair. Let's fuck. I've made too many fuck jokes, I don't know. I'm sorry, I'm more than this.

It's like Frankenstein spending all his time working on the monster and then it comes to life and he's like, this isn't what I fucking wanted. What's going on here? Yeah. That's fair. Let's talk about Instagram now. Okay.

Just all the different apps. Social media. Yeah, let's turn this into a tech conference. Why don't you guys read out some more tech? Oh, well, I know on the last episode you were talking about the people that have been the face of certain products. Old mate Nick Cody last year was the face. For a product that doesn't work. Yeah. Samsung Galaxy S7. What? mate Nick Cody last year heard of him for a product that doesn't work yeah

Samsung Galaxy S7 what I was the face for Telstra for five ads like as me like comedian Nick Cody here

talking about this thing then they start blowing up in the air really like I do eight champagnes in in business class and

yeah they've recorded all the ads and then the phones were blowing up so they're like Like I do, eight champagnes in in business class. Yeah, they've recorded all the ads and then the phones were blowing up. So they're like, we're not going to show it. Oh, so they didn't show them? No. Fuck, really? Yeah. How the fuck do I not know that? Because it wasn't shown.

Yeah, but you're you. You brag about eating toast. Yeah, because I fucking nail it. Have you seen how he eats it? Cross first. Very ironic. Guys, here's an ad I'm not on. It's a sweet brag.

That is a sweet brag. You get paid and no one ever sees it. That's incredible. Yeah. I know, it worked out well. What did you say about it? Oh, they... Oh, Dadlo doesn't blow up.

Yeah. They give you the copy. Like, they're not going, just talk for the time and have the product. Guys, I know kids are getting too immersed with technology, but if there was any phone I would hand your newborn baby, it would be the Samsung Galaxy S7. If you... Outside on a sunny day, just hand it over to your newborn bub. baby, it would be the Samsung Galaxy S7.

Outside on a sunny day, just hand it over to your newborn bub. If you don't know how to rub sticks together, use a Samsung... Are you going to have kids, Carl? It depends what are you doing later What a great comeback Someone burns you and your response is In so many words I will fuck you

And stick around for like 20 years That's like so nice. So do you think you'll have kids? Sure. Prove it. Prove it. Prove it. Prove it.

Do it. Get someone pregnant right now. Do it. Dr. Ramsey. Let's play spin the lucky Henry's can. Who it lands on? Now, this sponsorship is paying off for them. It's not a sponsorship, you see.

It's a close relationship. Oh, right. Like we'll have... No. So creepy. Man, you can do this sort of shit in Thailand in a couple months. Just chill out until then. That'll be good.

So it's you and Dilrock so far. They're the confirmed guests. Good line-up. I thought that'd make it something a bit different. I'm interested in one quarter of the guests. Because Dilrock's fat oh right I thought that meant

because there's two people you're only interested in the bottom half of Cody Cody's cock and anus no I meant it's like Dilrick's three out of four right but also

I'll suck his dick yeah I get it how is the 530 it's 530 how is this the looser show that's the best thing about it

oh no no my solo show starts in an hour. That's going to be a fucking loose show. You're not coming, are you? My Qantas ride in 45 minutes is going to be fairly loose as well. What airline are you flying home? Milan Air? No, you know five seconds ago when I said Qantas?

That one. I wasn't listening. I'm so sorry. Burns. I zoned you out. You blocked me on real life. Hey, we'd better wrap this episode up. What do you say?

Oh, okay. Let's do it. This is chaos at this point. This is it. There's no regaining control of this. Creamy drinks fucking reek, by the way. Creamy drinks. Yeah. He thought I control of this. Creamy drinks fucking reek, by the way. Creamy drinks. Yeah.

He thought I said Queensland. I said creamy drinks. Queensland! Near enough's good enough. 4X gold with cream on top. Queenslander! Queenslander! Wally Lewis's favourite drink.

Can of cream and a 4X gold That is liquid dance soup Shut up everyone Alright we've got to wrap this up Folks give a big round of applause Becky Lucas, Daniel Soss and Nick Coney Thank you so much guys for coming out Thank you for listening at home up folks give me a big applause becky lucas daniel sauce and nick coney thank you so much guys for coming out thank you for listening at home and we'll see you next time