The Little Dum Dum Club with Tommy & Karl - 339 - Live! Wil Anderson, Stephen K Amos & Dilruk Jayasinha

Episode Date: April 5, 2017

Tea Towels, Phone Numbers and Golliwogs.  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Today on the Little Dum Dum Club, the first of our big live episodes from Melbourne. But first of all, we have to tell you that today, this show is brought to you by Tom Ballard. Once again, digging into his little pocket to support this show. You seem bamboozled by this. Haven't we already had him? Yeah, he's back. Again? Yeah, he's back.

How many times is he going to sponsor this show? I don't know. Let's find out. I really thought this was an error. I was just waiting to tell you you've got the wrong one. Well, look, I'll double check it, but no. Nope, this is it. This is what he wants to do. This is how he's spending his money.

Didn't we have him two weeks ago or something? Yeah, yeah. Look at that. Get a look at that. There's proof. Oh, there he is. Right. He's done it again.

He's done it again. There's proof. Oh, there he is. Right. He's done it again. He's done it again. What I just showed Carl was my net bank. And T-Ballard, $4,000 for this one episode.

He just showed me. Daslo just showed me his email that said, rent's due. And then an email, hang on, rent's not due anymore if you do an ad. So he's once again supporting the show. The comedy festival is in full swing. Tom Ballard's show Problematic is happening

every night in at the Town Hall. Yeah, Tom cannot get enough of sponsoring this show and it's because he, yeah, he's on it all the time.

He listens to the show and he knows that you guys are such great, great supporters of live comedy. And you saw him on that gala spot where he wore the little Dun Dun Club t-shirt, so he's obviously invested.

He is one of the genuine guests of the show that do listen to the show. Yes. So he... He got very angry last time that we did an ad for him. Well, not that angry, obviously. Well, I accused him of eating my leftovers out of the fridge, which, hey, I stand by. He did do it.

I did say his contention was that I offered it to him. And I was forthcoming about this in the ad. I did say, hey, feel free to finish it off. But, you know, I said it in that way. You know what I mean? You don't seriously mean it. Do you know what I mean? Really?

Do you get where I'm coming from? Not really. Help yourself. It's like when someone comes around to your Do you get where I'm coming from? Not really. Help yourself. It's like when someone comes around to your house and you go, make yourself at home. Right. Now, how much do you really mean that? It's like, don't go have a wank in my bed.

Yeah. Like, that's making yourself at home, but you're not suggesting that. That's too – look, if you say, feel free to eat my food, and then they eat the food, I reckon – I'm starting to side with Bella. Well, I will say now that he's supported this show as much as he has, hey, just a half a leftover risotto. I mean, I can wear it. Financially,

I can wear it. Because we've got that big Ballard bunce coming in. Oh, that sweet Ballard dollar. I will say, speaking of Ballard, I went along to a live podcast of his last night. He does a live show, a podcast called Like I'm a Six-Year-Old, and I went to a live recording of that at the Wheeler Centre.

Much different audience going to a live Tom Ballard podcast. There was a woman sitting next to me knitting before the show began. No crowd surfing? No throwing stuff at the host? Yeah, he had the director of Get Up as his guest, and I just thought it was weird that he didn't call him a dumb

cunt at any point. That was kind of very jarring for me to be in the audience. He didn't go with a bit of, how about you get up and fuck off? Get up onto a stool, put the noose around your neck, and then kick the stool away. Get up on the Westgate and then get down off it. So, Tom Ballard, problematic. Speaking of things that are problematic, this conversation. A lot of hype going on around Tom Ballard's show this year as well.

Yes. He takes things very seriously and his shows are very well put together. He takes things very seriously. Well, you know what? He was the ducks of his school. So, you know, he's like a little nerd. He's a little swat doing all his work properly, putting the hard yards in like a fucking idiot.

Oh, every day in our house I'm flushing his head down the toilet. Oh, good. This is us kind of stealing his lunch money in a way. Yeah, yeah. This is us monetarily giving him a wedgie. So 7pm, Sundays at 6, in the Town Hall as part of the Melbourne International Comedy Festival. Go check out Tom Ballard.

Wear your little dum-dum shirt along so that he knows where those ticket sales have come from. Yep. Comedy.com.au for all that information. And for every person that goes on to see his show, that's a little dum-dum fan, that hears his sad, that goes on to see his show, he will personally save a refugee. He will personally, personally save one. A little boy from a war-torn country will live another day if you go along and see his show.

So all that money is going straight into their pockets. You know what? The more people come along to see his show, Christmas Island will be empty. So, yeah, go check that out. Tom Ballard in Problematic. I saw a trial of the show and it's fantastic. Okay, we need to move along and talk about what we're doing this month.

Well, we're running an ad for ourselves. Nice. Yeah. Huge for us. We've got – so, yeah, you're about to hear the first of the live podcasts from the European Beer Cafe. We have three more to go at this point. Sundays, 3 p.m. at the European Beer Cafe.

Huge guests. In the last couple of days, you and I, between us, we're recording this a bit before they start, we've booked in a heap of guests. Yes. Huge line-ups. Is this the biggest line-up we've done for a month of April gigs in Melbourne? Already, yeah.

And we don't even have all of them booked yet, but already we've got some of the biggest names we've had all locked in. So they're all awesome. And also our solo shows are starting this Sunday, April the 9th. You are on at 4. I'm at 5. No, you're on at like 4.30. I'm like 5.45, back to back, after the podcast.

That's a Sunday only time. We're especially going straight after the podcast every Sunday, so you guys can come along and see all three if you want to do that for your convenience. But of course, Mondays through to Saturdays, I'm on at 8.15 and you're on at 9.30. So yeah, right through until the end of April. Yeah, you can come see us the next two weeks. Both our shows are looking really good.

I'm particularly excited about mine. I've got a lot of cool stuff in it. You're more excited about yours than mine. Did I say that? You said we I've got a lot of cool stuff in it. You're more excited about yours than mine. Did I say that? You said we've both got good shows coming out. I'm particularly excited about mine. Yeah. Well, I've put more – I'll say this.

I've put more work into my show than I've put into your show. Yeah, right. That's fair. I mean, look. You've been a bit slack with my show, to be honest. Look, I'm happy to wear this. So far, I've done fuck all on your show. I've really dropped the ball.

I'm sorry. You and me both. No. No, it's all right. It's all right. Yeah, anyone who saw my show last year, I had a little book in it that had heaps of drawings in it. I think I've got more drawings this year

and I've got more kind of elaborate stuff going on. Yeah, which I'm very excited about and I think is going to be really fun and cool. So check that out. You, of course, are doing a return of your show with a heckler in it. It's not a return of the show it's a different show, it's the same concept with all new jokes and particularly

there's a lot of Dumb Dumb fans in Melbourne that come along and see you know our rooms and stuff like that during the year and they've seen me test out in the last three months I've been testing out every time I go out I test out brand new jokes and jettison the jokes that don't work. So your set list has four jokes on it so far.

Yeah, so they've seen me have a lot of fun with new jokes and new jokes that haven't made it. So I do love that process, but now I'm whittling down all the jokes that worked. The other day, literally, I've got a backpack full of notes that I've collected from the last three months of gigs and I've just had to go through all the listings of like, from the last three months of gigs and I've just had to go through all the listings of like, okay, tortoise head, red curtains,

funny ladder and just write all the set list names down. I mean, funny ladder. So the ladder itself is already funny. Yeah. If you can't get comedy out of an already funny ladder. Well, once I tested the joke out, it just had to be downgraded to just ladder. So yeah, those are going to be – yeah, these shows just had to be downgraded to just ladder. So yeah, these shows

are going to be really fun. This is the first time that it's ever been so easy for you guys to come and see both of us. It's only taken us six years to work out the formula of just being back to back in the same room. Idiots. There's a lot of idiotdom involved in all of those decisions. But anyway, not all our own.

So, come along. Sundays especially, man. Sundays especially. Man, Sundays are getting really full. What the fuck was that? Sundays are getting really full. But please come and support us. Of course, you know, Fridays and Saturdays are really easy for you guys as well. But we're doing Mondays.

We're doing Wednesdays. We're doing all the off nights. So come along and make a night of it. Come along. Midweek. We said this last week. If you're someone who can go out midweek, just make a comedian's dream come along and make a night of it. Come along and – Midweek. We said this last week. If you're someone who can go out midweek, just make a comedian's dream come true and fill up a Wednesday for it. Westgate Wednesdays.

Come and support Westgate Wednesdays because they're the worst nights of the week for comedy. Well, Westgate Wednesday is technically only one Wednesday of the festival, which we're not doing this year. Technically, it's the first night of the festival because previews finish and then there's Tidus Tuesday. And so that very first Wednesday is the first full-price night of the festival, which is when people go, why the fuck would I go and see a show then? Right. So we're technically missing that Wednesday,

but all Wednesdays are shithouse. Yeah, that's what I mean. Let's be honest. Yeah, totally, totally. It's all Wednesdays are Westgate Wednesdays. Yeah. Even outside of the festival as far as we're concerned. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

There's a few of the other days of the week as well, to be honest. So come along. Our shows are heaps of fun. So go and do that. Check that out. LittleDumbDumbClub.com for all those tickets. Obviously, the podcasts are very close to selling out. So get into that.

You know what? The last day of the festival, I I think is really, really filling up. Like the last bunch of shows we're doing on the very last Sunday, your solo, my solo, the live podcast at 3 o'clock and then because it's all leading up to the drunk cast. So you can tell people are making a day of it, particularly that and the Dilbrook roast yeah which is already sold out you can see with the figures you know people want to come and see everything at once during that day yes so that

that very last sunday man that is filling up that's going to be that podcast going to be sold out very soon a lot of people just going to make a massive dum-dum day of it i don't know how many hours they're going to go and see stuff for yeah that's going to be massive people are making a weekend of it because i'm doing a live episode of my video game show on the Saturday before. Right. So I know there's a bit of crossover. Who'd have thought? A lot of podcasters just also happen to be video game fans.

There's a lot of people making a big old weekend of it. Yeah. To be honest, I've never been recognised down at my gym. Okay. So then we need to move on to the Koh Samui International Podcast Festival, which is on May 31 till June the 4th at the Ozo Chuang Samui Resort. Technically, I guess we're planning on leaving June 5. But yeah, the responses from listeners keeps tumbling in on Twitter and Facebook

and email and stuff like that. People are excited. People are asking questions. So a lot of people confirming and just going, what flights are you guys on and what time is the first podcast and, you know, exactly what's going to be the order. It's almost like they think we've organised a bunch of this stuff. Have you not been paying attention for the last six years?

Just get your sweet little heinies over there and we'll let you know within a month leading up to it. Knowing us, we do nothing between now and then and then we just turn up in Samui like, now what? Did anyone bring mics? So just get your heinies there within a month to go. We don't need to plan it out. Yeah.

We don't need to plan it out Like two, three months out I do want to draw up Like when a big music festival Will kind of They'll release their timetables We'll do something like that We'll do a big official announcement Maybe we'll go live again

Maybe we'll do another live streaming thing To announce the official timetable I'm working on sponsorship as well So we still want to confirm something like that. So please get onto that. Of course, the Ozo Chuang Samui Resort is the jewel in the crown of accommodation in Samui, on Koh Samui.

So get onto that. Go onto their official website and then use the password podcast to get extremely great rates in an extremely great resort. Now, it's nearly, roughly, it's nearly half price if you use our password. Great. It's nearly half price, which is amazing.

So, you know, you're making money being over there. Yes. Really. Yes. So, get over there. Join the email list if you want to. We've already put out sort of what flights we're going to be taking, but you can figure it out.

Just get online and get the cheapest flights you can to get over there and make a holiday of it. And exciting that we – have we talked about this yet? A lot of people – we get in on the night of the 31st. Yes. So there's a lot of people that get there that morning. Yes. Including Nick Cody and his father.

Yes. So we're looking for like a bit of a welcoming party when we come in hot to the resort. Well, we think – yeah. It feels like there's a lot of people we're going to be almost getting their last. Yeah. Because we're certainly getting in on the 31st. We get in at like 9.30 p.m.

So I can't imagine too many people coming in later than that. No, that's the last plane that comes in. Yeah. So we're – but there are some people who are thinking about coming in on the first. That's all. But we're on the last plane of the night. So there's going to be a lot of people sitting around. A hero's welcome. Yeah, there's going to be a lot of people sitting around our resort getting charged right up.

Yes. And maybe doing a bit of damage already before we even get there. So we're going to probably walk in with the hero's welcome. It's like, here's the damage bill so far. Oh, fuck. Yep. Yep. But that's going to be super exciting.

So get onto that. And you know what? We've still got what? It's not quite two months out from it. So there's still heaps of time to make your call, to convince your girlfriend, to convince your boyfriend. I don't think that's, is that happening? Is that ever happening?

Maybe. Yeah. Has anyone ever had a boyfriend before? No. Is there any female listeners of this show that are having to twist the arm of a boyfriend? Oh, certainly. I mean, they'd be in the minority, but I definitely think. Well, let me know.

Let us know if that is the case. It just seems all the correspondence I get is guys saying, I'm trying to convince my girlfriend to come over here. And I'm like, fuck, good luck, buddy. But I'd like to know if there's any girls that are doing the opposite. Hey, this is probably a bit grim to bring up. But speaking about this, an eccentric Serbian billionaire, Milan Krencevic, is coming over with us.

Yes. Did you see this news story today about a woman in Bali who died over there after doing like 30 shots in one night? No. And all I could think was, oh, Milan. He's done it again. He's done it again. No, it's not Bali.

We wouldn't touch Bali with a bloody 10-foot barge pole. It's Thailand. It's Koh Samui. Don't scare people like that. God. Again, it happened in a different country. I'm just saying. Look, it was just a timely reminder of knowing your body's limits. Yeah. Stuff can

happen anywhere. Yes. You know? Wow. People probably did that in the next unit next to my house right now. So, awesome times. It's once in a lifetime. Fucking so get onto it uh and then of course thank you to all the the patreoners thank you to the patreoners that are chipping in to support us thank you to all the people who are continuing to donate to the kosamui podcast festival via uh gofundme yes of course that is still running we we officially reached the little

goal that we made but uh we will take more because especially, you know, we still need money to fly people over. But on top of that, of course, you guys get rewards. We're filming, we're recording audio, a lot of bonus material in Koh Samui. And the GoFundMe and all this stuff. Oh, we have T-shirts available, which will have gone out by the time people hear this, the first round of orders.

Well, they just came in today as we recorded this. So they're all going out. And all these links the way the gofundme the uh the link to the ozo chowang samui resort the t-shirts all of this stuff can be found at littledumbdumbclub.com just a timely reminder anything we talk about in this ad that's where you can find all the information for that totally uh so uh thank you to the patreoners that continue to support us to pay for the show and of course you get bonus episodes you get a magazine and speaking of which the magazine that we just sent out includes a thing that I wrote

a little page in there that you can use to help convince your partner to come along to the Koh Samui Podcast Festival. And whether this is weird or again going back to the dark side of what you were doing, there's you have written for the magazine two different wills of going to Samui. Well the first one was my last will and testament for if i die in the if i die

over there which is a big chance but then i wrote another one because we've been talking on the show a lot about we want patreoners if they we want to be written into someone's will oh yeah so that if if someone if someone who donates to this show carks it, we want to make sure that we're still getting funded. And just because we talked about it so much, I figured, oh, I should write one up and put it in the magazine. But then another guest of ours then wrote another will on them. I'm like, this is just too creepy. There doesn't need to be a will every week.

It's almost like there's a comedy festival coming up and we're all wishing we were dead. So anyway, that magazine, the bonus episode goes out as well, of course. And of course, that's for $10, the bonus episode goes out as well of course and of course that's for $10 the bonus episode for $5

the magazine for $2 is the sweet mention of which I'm going to start right now thank you to Patreon subscribers Benjamin Richards

Benny Rich well yeah certainly certainly a bit rich Richie Richard, if he's dipping into the old funds to pay us. Benjamin is making us a bit more

Richard's. Oh, yeah. A few sweet Benjamins coming in. Exactly. You just beat me to it. In a currency that we don't have in this country. Is Benjamins a $100 note or what's that? I guess. The Benjamins. I think it's like a... Because it's like Rolling with the Benjamins.

It can't be like a one or two. Yeah, yeah, exactly. It's like Benjamin Franklin, of course. I reckon, yeah. I just figured that out then. I never knew that. Anyway, Benjamin Franklin,

so that's on the $100 bill? It must be the $100 because I mean, I guess you could still say Rolling with the Benjamins is like you've just got a fuckload of dollars. Of 20s.

You could still have if it was just $1.90. Well, George Washington is on the one. That's the only thing I know. Right. I didn't even know that. I think, oh, Abraham Lincoln. One of them. One of was just $1.90. Well, George Washington is on the one. That's the only thing I know. Right. I didn't even know that. I think.

Oh, Abraham Lincoln. One of them. One of the super iconic ones. Yep. Yeah. Benjamin Richards. Two names, two first names. Very nice work, Benjamin.

Thank you for your first name. Thank you for making it rain on us. Yeah. Thanks, Benjamins. Secondly, thank you to, now this is always a bit tricky. Someone will send in their donation, their subscription, and they won't use their name. Okay.

They'll just put some other bullshit in there. Okay. So I'll do one of those. Okay. Thank you to Migsie Matosis. That's what they put in there. Migsie Matosis. Migsie Matosis.

So that's meant to be – is that meant to be a – It would be an extension of a nickname, I would say, because it's like Migsie. It must be – so it's someone called Jenny Migs or something. No, I reckon they're trying to make it sound like Migsimatosis, the thing that kills rabbits. I know, but I think that comes from somewhere, like Migs. So it must be Jenny Migs or whatever.

You're probably too old for the show The TV show The Ferals It was an Australian Kids TV show Slight Like I'm certainly aware of it A whole bunch of feral animals Living in a share house

And they're all puppets And there was a rabbit Called Mixie Named after the disease Myxomatosis Which kills rabbits Yes Which I think is fucked

Yes And hilarious Well that's who this person is Oh really Yeah One of the ferals Like the actual character From the ferals Yes Oh well actual character from the ferals.

Yes. Oh, well, fuck yeah. Yeah. Now we just need to get Rattus the rat chipping in. Isn't that great that you go from Mixamatoes, it's like, oh, that's funny, Mixie, like the disease that they get. What should we call the rat? Just Rattus will do it.

Yeah. It's like they really gave up pretty early on in that production meeting. Rat poison. Rat boy. And their email address. So whenever someone does something like that, I then go to their email address to see, oh, what's the giveaway? What's their real name?

But then their email, without telling you exactly what it was, but it's like then it goes Jive Dog Turkey at something. So they've gone to quite an extent to make sure we don't know who they are. We can never track them back. Yeah. I almost dare say we could have gotten away with not reading their name out. I know, but... It's almost like they didn't want that to happen.

Yeah, well, Jive Dog. Jive Dog Turkey, that's your email. Who are you sending emails to? Like, you've then got to go and get a second email, don't you? You don't think that's a fake email? Oh, maybe. I reckon it is. I reckon they just don't want any correspondence of any kind.

Okay. All right. Well, sorry. Sorry, Migsy. I reckon they just don't want any correspondence of any kind. Okay. All right. Well, sorry. Sorry, Migsy. Because what amount have they chipped in for? Oh, I don't have that information. Okay. Because unless it's – if it's just $2, in which case they don't get the magazine or the episode.

It's not $2. What do they need to worry? It's not $2. Like, special little Patreon hint. I tend to prioritise the people who are donating more. Oh, okay. Well, it must be real then because that's the only way of getting that sweet content. Yeah. Jive Dog Turkey. Yeah.

That must be, that's someone very young who they'll be changing that over pretty soon once they get out of school. Or it's someone who's just so secure in their job. They've got their work email and this is just where they wild out on their private account. Jive Dog Turkey. Thanks, Migsy. Thanks,

Migs. Thank you to Connor O'Toole. Connor O'Toole. Yeah, it looks like Connor has got out the old tool that has all the money in it. A bad workman blames his tools, but

I'm saying thank you to this tool for giving us money. I'm saying thank you to this tool for giving us money. I'm saying you are not a tool for slinging us all this sweet cash, Connor. You've got an ironic name, in my humble opinion. I think you're not a tool at all. I think you should be called Connor O'Champ. Connor O', fucking very good supporter of the show. Yeah.

We're not being conned here. No. Fuck, this is the worst. This is hard. This is really hard. No, you know what? You know what it is? I just keep thinking of Tim the Tool Man Taylor.

I'm like, how can I turn that into something? I've got it. I've got it. Because he spelt, Connor spelt C-O-N-O-R. Connor O'Toole. Connor O'Toole, more like Donor O'Toole. Fuck yes. Yeah. Yes. Donor. I likeR. Connor O'Toole. Connor O'Toole, more like Donor O'Toole. Fuck yes. Yeah.

Yes. Donor. I like it. Thanks for donating. Good. Conor. Good. Thanks, Connor.

Donor. Thank you to Benny Kane. Benny Kane. K-A-N-E. I feel like we've had a Kane before because I feel like I've said this, Kane and Abel. Abel to donate money. That's good. And again, Benny, some Benjamins.

Some more Benjamins. Reminds me of a sweet friend of mine I remember from yesterday called Benjamin Richards. He once gave us money. Do you remember him? Whatever happened to that guy? I don't know. Went broke donating to podcasts.

Yeah, I think he's on the street now selling big issues. And I hope we get a cut of that too. Yeah. I've never read a big issue, I have to be honest. I have. I've very selfishly looked at it and gone, I wonder if I can get work for this. Yeah, I wrote something for them last year and they went,

oh, they were like, do what you want. And then I sent it to them and they were like, oh, can you do it again more like this? And I went, okay. And then I redid it and they're like, oh, it's too late now. We're not going to run it. But we'll still pay you. Money for jam, Carl.

Money for jam. Do you feel a bit guilty taking money off a homeless magazine? No. And not even running? No. Fuck. It took so long. It took so much of my time from them going, but isn't that great?

You would have had things like that. That's how this little peek behind the curtain of the industry, do what you want, never means we'll be happy with whatever we get. It means we want to give you freedom, but we have a very clear idea in our heads of what this is going to turn out to be. And then when it's not, it's like, oh, we actually meant just write the script from The Office. I had a bit of something slightly similar, a little bit different actually. Look, the best thing in the world is what you did there in terms of not being… Oh, you're berating me and now it's the best thing in the world.

No, but just because of the company involved. You want to get paid for something not even going out there. Yeah, totally. My dream is to get a radio job. It's for us to be on the radio and get sacked. And get fired, yeah, and get that sweet payout. Get going out there. Yeah. You know, like my dream is to get a radio job. It's for us to be on the radio and get sacked. And get fired, yeah, and get that sweet payout. Get that payout. Yeah.

So I had something where a TV show rang me up the other day and went, we want you to do a bit of work. I was like, cool, no worries. Anyway, no payment. Great. And I was like, so you want me to work for free for a TV show? Great. Yeah, yeah.

It's like, no, I won't be doing free for a TV show? Great. Yeah. Yeah. It's like, no, I won't be doing that. No. And then I just actually gave him a bit of a lecture going, you know what? I run gigs. I do stuff like that. Like we have the live podcast. And when people come and do work, I pay them. So this is what I'm saying to them.

I pay them. Yeah. So I won't be accepting anything less than that. And then they're, of course. What about this? Maybe we can make this a bit of an ad for getting onto the Patreon. Now, we've done some episodes. We released some audio from the roast that we did of you last year.

Yeah. We did – we've done some special things that we kind of – we do sort of slightly different things on there because we know that we kind of have a bit of a veil of secrecy. Do you know what I mean? Like it's only going out to, not anyone can get it. So we can be a bit more, a bit more free on there.

What if we do a Patreon, because you and I between us, we've had, we've had a lot of, we've had a lot of offers from people, but a lot of people ask us to do stuff for them where they've flat out taken the piss. What if we do an episode where we lift the lid and we expose all these cunts and we go through one by one, all the shockingly,

obscenely embarrassing offers that we've gotten from big organisations. Fuck. That sounds more like a live thing. I don't know if that should be recorded, that stuff, because that could be easily forwarded on to someone, can't it? Yeah, maybe. Well, maybe we don't have to name them. Maybe we can just kind of hint around who they are.

But all we're doing is just – all we're really doing is reading out emails that someone sent to us thinking that they'd be in private. Yeah. Okay, maybe. Maybe the drunk cast then. Yeah, maybe. Because I reckon we could feel – because we've over the years, both with the podcast and separately, we've had a lot of –

you've called me up to go, someone wants us to come and do this. And I've gone, fucking great. Yeah, yeah. And you've gone, yeah, but this is the deal. And it's just ridiculous. Okay, yeah us to come and do this. And I've gone, fucking great. And you've gone, yeah, but this is the deal. And it's just ridiculous. Okay, yeah, maybe we can do that. Let's whistle blow. Yeah, let's blow this industry

wide open and never work again. Yeah. Thanks, Benny. Alright, let's do one more. Okay, one more. One more. Alright, thank you to Patreon. All right, let's do one more. Okay, one more, one more. One more, one more. One more.

All right, thank you to Patreon subscribers. Oh, nice. Well, we don't know whether Migsie Mitosis was a girl or not. I guessed that that was a girl. That was Jenny Migs. That's what I made up for that. But it might not have been. Could have been Gary Migs.

So if so, if so, that means that this would be the first female Patreon subscriber of this week. Okay. Yeah. Great. So definitely, no, definitely a girl. Mary. Mary.

Thank you to Mary. Thanks, Mary. Thank you to Mary Burra. Mary Burra, Patreon subscriber, female Patreon subscriber this week. She's chucking in a lot. She's done a lot to benefit me over the years personally. The show and me. What sort of bird do you reckon Mary Burra is?

What sort of Sheila do you think she is? She's a little bit disrespectful to someone who's paying his money. She could be a fine young lady. You think so? Okay. Probably not by the sound of it. Now someone who's paying his money. She could be a fine young lady. You think so? Okay. Probably not by the sound of it. Now, let's just say this. Before we started recording, you went, oh, hang on, I don't have a last name yet. And we sat here for about ten minutes.

No, we didn't. We didn't. It was very quick until I found that name. It was very quick. So thank you to What sort of person do I think she is I would say You know

She's been generous in Let's say this She's been generous in giving us this money Yes But who knows where she got it from Is what I would say I would say It's been

There's been something Swiped out of a shop Take it down to cash converters Yes And we're getting that money That's what I say I mean if your last name's Burra Yeah Kill yourself cash converters, and we're getting that money. That's what I say. I mean, if your last name's Burra.

Yeah. Kill yourself. Get out of Central Victoria while you can. Seize your turn 17. Get the fuck out is my advice to you. All right. Thanks, Mary. Thanks, Mary.

So if you want to chip in and help keep this wonderful podcast going, patreon.com slash little dum-dClub. All this information, like we said, tickets to our solo shows, tickets to the live podcast, the Koh Samui Podcast Festival, T-shirts, the Patreon at LittleDumbDumbClub.com. Go see Tom Ballard during the Comedy Festival. Comedy.com.au is where you can find all that information. And that's it, isn't it? Yeah, come and see. You know, a lot of people are flying in from interstate to Melbourne

to come and see these shows, or just people from Melbourne. If you've never been before, if you've listened in the last year, please come along and see your first live show. Hey, there might be some people out there sort of teetering on the edge. Ah, should we go down to Melbourne for a weekend? Yep. Fucking do it, because everyone who comes down, every year we see more and more people flying in from interstate and stuff

to see us, see friends of the show. And it really is, it's a fucking great month. It's so much fun to go and see heaps of live shows. This is the time of the year. You're seeing everyone at their absolute best, their absolute A game. And also, if you've been listening for a while or a little while or a long while, come and see the show.

Come and say hello afterwards. I think people are genuinely a little bit surprised that we're quite nice to everyone. I know we carry on like fucking idiots surprised that we're quite nice to everyone. I know we carry on like fucking idiots now, but we're nice to everyone. Personally, I like meeting everyone. You sort of do. Yeah, I do. Okay, that's good.

Well, we try and hang around a little bit after and say hello to everyone and whatever. And I'm always keen to hear how people got into it. Yeah, it's awesome. Because not to oversell it or anything, but we spend most of the year doing this in a little bubble where we're just at one of our houses and so it is awesome when we do these things to get out there and be reminded that there are actual real people that listen and people come up and tell us how much it means to them each week.

I think, you know what, I've had this a little bit with my other show as well. Like I met a bunch of listeners of that over the weekend and people almost seem like embarrassed to tell you that they listen and that it means something to them like people come up and they're like oh i'm sorry to be a nerd but i listen on the bus to uni and i really enjoy it and i have a laugh don't be embarrassed that's great that's why we do it like you don't have to feel ashamed or like weird about coming and telling us that you like something that we put a lot of work into. Like that's great. That's what you want to hear.

Exactly. A, we do that to other people that we like when we go and meet people and see people in music or whatever it is. Yeah. And B, yeah, you're essentially telling us we're doing a good job and keep going, which we sort of like. Yes, yes. And on top of this, this is what I meant to say.

But that's – I get it because I'm a big nerd for like meeting musicians that I like and nerding out and just wanting to say, I really like you. And yeah, I will say being on the other end of it is horrendous. Like having to ask someone for a photo, you never feel like a bigger idiot than standing there waiting. But being on the other side of it, it's, I mean, I'm doing this to musicians that have done it enough that they're over it.

We're not over it. It's still exciting. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, so two things I've just thought of. One, last night I met Cat Stevens. Oh, yeah. On the street. Yeah, right.

Yeah, which is weird, which I felt a bit bad going up. I didn't get a photo or anything like that. I just went up and went, oh, I'm just going to shake Cat Stevens' hand. Do you want to get up and do five? Yeah, exactly. Exactly. So I met him. That was cool. I felt bad shaking his hand a little bit but he's done a million times whatever um and b people in brisbane did some sweet cosplay yes people and we've never

sort of copped that before fuck i thought it was so good it honestly felt like because he used on hey hey saturday there used to be a bit of that there'd be like a fancy dress party or whatever wow so you like this because it means that we're more like hey hey saturday totally exactly well we were i mean we that that run in brisbane people were dressing up like us we were doing shane bourne impressions yes it was very hey hey at saturday so there was two people at least two people that dressed up uh as references from our show yes man if you're coming to Melbourne, do that. Yeah, totally. I would love to see heaps of that.

Yeah, definitely. That looks so funny. Big time. And we should organise it and give a prize to someone or something that has the best one. Yeah, let's try and find some stuff that we can give out to people that are going to do that kind of stuff. Yeah, we can do that. We'll find a prize. Yeah.

For people that are coming along, if you want to dress up, we'll find some sort of a prize for doing it. Yeah. Great. Sweet. Okay. So enjoy this episode live from Melbourne, and we'll see you out there in the real world. Hey, mates.

Welcome to the Little Dundum Club for another week live from the European Beer Cafe in Melbourne. My name is Tommy Dasolo. Thank you very much for joining us. Standing next to me, the other half of the program, Carl Chandler! G'day, dickheads! So, we begin our solo shows. We're doing the first night of our solo shows immediately after this. Who is okay with us turning this podcast into a trial show? Does anyone mind that? If we just test out some gear?

Who's coming to the solo shows afterwards? Don't ask. Don't ask. Don't ask, don't tell. Numo, can you do this again? He's done it again. Fuck, honestly, for people at home, I just ask who's coming, two people put their hand up.

But not only that... There's fucking 200 people here. But not only that, two people put their hand up, but they were so sheepish about it. Like, they didn't want to embarrass themselves in front of everyone else. It was just like, please don't tell anyone. Like, high enough that you can see it from on stage,

but no-one sitting behind us would be able to tell. It's me. I'm coming to the show. It's going to be good, guys. This is just going to be an hour ad for that show. Who's won over? Has anyone been convinced in the last two minutes? Hand up. Blink twice

if you're in this audience and you're going to come to our shows. Hey, someone's left an engagement present up here for you. Carl if you're in this audience and you're going to come to our shows. Hey, someone's left... It looks like someone's left an engagement present up here for you. Oh. Carl, brackets, and Carl's girlfriend. Sorry for reading your name out on the show. I know you don't like that.

But, yeah, do you want to... Yeah, the wrapping says... Oh, no, no, you open it. I thought it might be nicer for you to just sit there and relax. All right, fine. Well, hey, it's partly addressed to me anyway, so... Yeah, all right.

Well, for people that haven to me anyway, so. Yeah, alright. Well, for people that haven't seen you, sure. You fuck me. Get it? Alright, alright. What have we got? This is an actual...

Oh, tea towels. Oh, hang on. Oh, fuck, hang on. Hey, now... Now I get it. This guy gets it. You sure you don't want a hand opening that? This is going to be a sweet visual gag and this is going to sound great on the podcast.

We're not making this up, guys at home. We actually are opening a package live on stage. Alright, here we go. For the big reveal. Is this... Wait, wait. Should we just never say what it is for the people at home? Buy some fucking tickets you cheap cunts. And for more visual gags like this, we've got

a stand-up show later. Well, I've got a bunch. Wow, a double-ended dildo. I can't believe a listener got you that as an engagement present. A live dinosaur. Fuck me dead. What do you get, the man who has everything? A moose-covered sex doll.

Awesome. No, it's a, what is it? It's a tea towel that says, clean up, cunt. Yeah. No, not only that... But wait, hang on. There's no comma after the up. So...

Sounds like... Sounds like the wedding night got a bit brutal. It's more like something for mopping up after the honeymoon or something. What? Oh, man. But not only that, there's not one of them. There's like four of them.

Do I need that many C-bombs in my kitchen? I don't know. But they all say different stuff, don't they? So this one says, do the dishes, dick. Oh, okay. And then this one says, clean the fuck up. All right. You need to cut two of them in half and stitch them together

so you have one That just says Fuck up cunt Yes Yes Just take all the context Out of the kitchen Fuck that's great So if you

If you cut them together What would the rest of it make then? Do Do the Do the Do the fuck up? Do the cunt. No. No, clean the dick.

That was an avenue that wasn't worth going down. That's excellent. Thank you to whoever gave me the only present I've gotten for getting engaged. So who was that? Read the card. Fuck, alright.

I hope it's as nice as the present. I hope that's the person who wrote the card reading that out. Because they know that it's particularly good. Otherwise, we are taking a fucking gamble here. Oh, the suspense. I hope we get the sound right. Is there a little joke on the cover? Oh yeah the suspense. I hope we get the sound right. Is there a little joke on the cover? Oh, yeah, okay.

Oh, yeah, all right. Fuck, no wonder. There's just some proper material put in here. So the front of the card is there's a diagram, assignment of airplane seats. And then it says, it says, there's a colour for the,

here is your seat, a colour for screaming baby with baby crossed out saying Tommy. Then a colour for fast asleep passenger with passenger crossed out with it saying fleety. A colour with incessantly talkative passenger with talkative passenger crossed out and eating dill put in. Drunk tourist, tourist crossed out moony. And then regular passenger, passenger crossed out dumb cunts. A real scattergun approach to references thrown in there. Shall I read out the middle of it? Sure.

I mean, is it to be read out or is it just like, is it a private message? You can read it out. Whoa, all right. All right. Dear Carl and Carl's girlfriend, when my mate Kit at Kitchen Language Generalcy... Fuck, are we running an ad for someone without getting paid?

Some of you just get sponsorship just by throwing something on our stage. Yeah. Fuck. It's not bad. Hey, you got something for free out of it. I don't want that shit. As if I'd do the...

Oh, no. Wow. When my mate at Kitchen Language generously sent me an extra set of her tea towels, I held onto them for the perfect occasion to gift them to someone

and if that isn't an addition to your soon-to-be-maritable home, I don't know what is. Plus it provides some sweet visual content for the podcast. We all know how well that works. Happy engagement about fucking time. From Jackie.

Thanks, Jackie. So hang on. So Jackie's friend owns this company, and she's gone, hey, I've just started up my own business. I'd love you to have some of our product as one of my best friends. And she's gone, hey, I've just started up my own business. I'd love you to have some of our product as one of my best friends. And she's gone, fuck this. I'm going to throw these at those two cunts that do that show that I

listen to in a couple of months. Yeah, yeah. That just got re-gifted to me. Yeah. You cheap bitch. Is that one of the tea towels? Buy a washing machine, you cheap bitch. Oh, wonderful stuff. We are having a great time down here at the European Beer Cafe,

Sunday afternoons, 3pm. Having said that... For the entire month of April. Having said that, I... Speaking of my girlfriend, we... Milan's not here tonight. Fuck, that's not my girlfriend, but anyway. You know what I'm trying to say.

So, Milan, we all know who Milan is. Milan is an increasingly regular segment of this show. Milan, the renowned Slovakian arms dealer. He's not here today, otherwise you would all be very well drunk already. Judging by what I've seen on the news, I think he's making his way through some parts of Queensland at the moment. There are a lot of people up there

under liquid, so yeah, sure. Sure. Lost me house, lost me family. Prove it! Prove it! Yeah, they lost it. They just don't know where it is now. They're just drunk. Anyway, tragedy's funny.

So I went out. I've been out to lunch with Milan a couple of times in the last two weeks. And this is the best thing you can do to Milan because he loves to buy everyone drinks. This is the best thing you do. You go out to lunch with him. And then I sort of say, oh, gee, where's the bathroom? Do you know where it is, Milan? He'll be like, I don't know.

Then I sneak off. Pretend I'm going to the bathroom. I go and pay for the meal and then when we go to leave he goes I've got this one and goes and gets like a million bucks out of his wallet and goes and they go your money's no good here Milan and he just goes what and he looks at me I go fuck you I just fucking Milan to Milan so I. So I did that twice in a row, so I'm so fucking happy with myself. Carl Chandler, the only man that can turn a generous act

into a fucking beatdown. So I then went back, I told my girlfriend that story, and she goes, oh, and I go, yeah, so I out Milan'd Milan. And she goes, wait, did you really? Is the end of the story then you walked out with a big tray of shots? And I'm like, oh, yeah, no, that's pretty funny. And then she got encouraged by me laughing. And so she goes, yeah.

And then a hundred strippers arrived like a pack of fucking rats. Fuck, where did you pull that one from? I'm very excited about that. I don't know if Milan's got a reputation of rat-like strippers coming from everywhere. Yeah, real mousy-looking strippers. So does your girlfriend want to get involved now? Is she going to try and, you know, she sounds like she's pretty into it.

I thought the end of the story was going to be her phoning ahead to somewhere she knew Milan was going. She's putting a whole bunch of shots on order for it. She does want to go out for dinner and at dinners with Milan, but I'm like, she's like dead after two drinks. So that's not a good idea to go with Milan if you can only drink two beers. Yeah. So no.

Okay. Once again, every Sunday at the European Beer Cafe, 3pm. Tickets available on the door for the entire month of April. Anyone got any more tea towels? All right, fair enough. Have we got news? We've got some news with the Koh Samui Podcast Festival. Koh Samui International Podcast

Festival. Who's coming? That's here? Just the same two people? More people are going to Thailand than our fucking solo shows. Than downstairs. The trip down the stairs is free, guys. You don't need to wait for a Jetstar

sale to fucking waddle on down there fucking hell you don't need to get shots you don't need to have your passport you just need fucking gravity oh wow I've been Milan'd just by you going shots

I was like you gotta do shots to get on air oh no like vaccinations right that's the next we gotta transition Milan off of alcohol are you going shots? I was like, you gotta do shots to get on air? Oh no, like vaccinations, right. That's the next, that's, we gotta get, we gotta transition Milan off of alcohol. Let's see if we can get Milan

to shout us a round of vaccinations before we head over, before we head over to Southeast Asia. Vaccinate it. Vaccinate it. Fuck,

alright, you guys are over it. Alright. No, so we do have a, we have got some news on the Coastal Movie Podcast Festival in terms of, we do have We have got some news on The Coastal Movie Podcast Festival We do have a GoFundMe site out there

That some people have put in for We were talking last week about how we had A very generous person Called Rich Young We were talking on one of the Brisbane episodes A man called Rich Young All of a sudden in the middle of the night We receive a donation on the GoFundMe page

For $1,000. We talked about this last week. It was him wanting us to promote his YouTube channel. And we've been on the YouTube channel. I don't know if anyone's looked it up since we posted the link. If anyone's been able to work this out, please come forward. We cannot work out what the fuck this channel is, what he wants out of us.

Like it's some him editing songs or some bullshit. So we basically got up and said that, right, we basically just went who knows what the fuck this cunt's on about who knows what he wants, but he's given us a thousand dollars to just plug his shit YouTube channel there you go, then all of a sudden we put the episode up, in the

middle of the week, you get a message going, you cunts didn't fucking roast me properly. Then all of a sudden on the GoFundMe page, he has sent us another $1,000. Yeah. With a message saying, do it right this time, you stupid cunts. Yeah.

So, look, he's now given us two grand, which I think is enough for naming rights. Yeah. So I'd like to announce the debut of the official. The Rich Young is a fucking stupid idiot and his shithouse fucking YouTube channel, Koh Samui Podcast. Yes.

Yes. Yes. So he wants us to really fuck him up in this episode, which, I mean, I guess we should attempt to do because he's given us $2,000 now. But also, last time when we did it wrong, according to him, we got more money. So I think we should just keep fucking it up

and see how much this guy's got in him. Yeah. He's a good bloke. I love him. I want to suck him off. He's great. I love his YouTube channel. It's great.

I've unsubscribed from everything else. All I subscribe to now is Guru One. I love it. I love the cover art that he puts of Paris Hilton on all the videos. Awesome stuff. Yeah. I love the shittest fucking YouTube clips in the world. They're so good.

They're so fucking good. So he's like, honestly, I've hit up so many companies asking them to like sponsor our trip over there and sponsor the podcast. Everyone's like, fuck off. This idiot is like, fuck, go for it. Like imagine if we had got like, I literally put in for, who have I pitched for? Like Chang Beer, Jetstar, all these people. Like, imagine if they had come back and gone,

yeah, yeah, we'll give you the money. Just make sure you say Jetstar's a fucking shit heap. Could have you to give them a mention on the podcast when they said no to sponsoring it. Well, I just called them a shit heap, so. Yeah, true. And we are flying with them, so. But so, yeah, I don't know.

Fuck, I'm nervous about this. Like, I'm worried about this. This guy seems... Well, you're very worried because you think he's going to fly over to Costa Milla as well. I just think he's going to find us somewhere and it doesn't need to be in international waters. He could just do it here.

Well, the thing that really weirded me out, there was a lot of correspondence going back and forth, the thing that weirded me out where he said, I'll give you this money and then in a while you can give some of it back. Yes, yes. And it's like, that's not how fucking sponsorship works. Yes. That's a weird loan from someone we've never met.

Yeah, I'm fucking worried about this guy. I don't know. Not worried enough to give the money back. Let's make that clear. But that's the thing. I was talking to a friend About it And they're like

You do not This guy sounds Like crazy You don't want to be Involved with this guy You've got to give it back That's not how GoFundMe works

You can't send money back You don't get any Return details So we have to take it Yeah I also like that He sends us that money Hasn't bought a ticket

To our solo show But yeah Do we know where he lives? Is he in Melbourne? I don't even think that's his real name. Like Rich Young. As if that's your fucking name.

That's just two things you want to be. Thanks Rich. He's certainly making us that eventually. Yeah. Well. Fuck.

One of them. Aww. Aww. Shall we get our first guest out here? Yeah. We reckon. Folks, welcome our first guest of this run of shows. Go absolutely crazy and welcome back into the little dum-dum club,

Will Anderson! Will Anderson! Yeah, there's no way that guy's going to kill you. Because it's not like you constantly give out your phone number and details of where you fucking live on the podcast. So, no, good luck. Good luck. To be fair, it's not constantly, it's once. A nice, normal person definitely wants to give $2,000 to a podcast

that consists of getting people in a room together, playing them nine minutes of people saying dumb cunt. Then the first ten minutes of the show is reading out tea towels. Then you tell a couple of yarns about a guy most of the people listening have never fucking met. So the stories aren't quite as good to them because they haven't got 300 free shots from fucking Milan. And then you bag the only guy who's ever given you anything.

Good point. We are going to win the Barry this year. Not sure if we're eligible. I got a present as well. Somebody gave me a gift. Gave you a gift at our podcast. Yep. It's from a gift at our podcast? Yep. Fuck it.

It's from a listener to the podcast. Hang on, I've got to put my beard down so I can have a read of the little card so I can see who it's from. It says, Dear Will, it's very nice handwriting, by the way. Dear Will, thanks so much for giving me my first ever spot on the gala stage. Fuck!

Deal! my first ever spot on the gala stage. Fuck! Dil! Now that's how you get ahead in fucking show business. I could have asked you guys to do warm-up for me at the gala, but you would have spent 40 minutes just finding out audience members' names and defaming them. Yeah, it would have been great.

I think people would have really liked that. So you got Dilruk Jaisingar to go out and do warm-up for the gala? Yeah, for the gala. It's great. He's not actually going to be on TV, so you've obviously not got that much pull. That's not true. I've got Nick Cody on.

He's here tonight. Hang on, you've got Nick Cody here tonight? Is that your pull Cody on. He's here tonight. Hang on, you got Nick Cody here tonight? Is that your pull? I got him here tonight. He's bigger than you guys now, but I said, if I'm there, mate, you can be. Yeah, great. You got him in for free.

Very nice. So what did he give? I didn't see the present. What did Dill actually give you? It's a bottle of wine. I haven't looked at what... Oh, hang on. Here we go.

Okay, nice. Oh, I didn't realise it was themed. Is wine meant to come in a box? To the podcast, because it says it's bin 23. And we know you guys love to eat over bins. 23, the number of years Carl's girlfriend was waiting for a proposal. It's very on brand. It's weird that it's on brand from our show,

when it's a gift to you. I will very on brand. It's weird that it's on brand from our show, but it's a gift to you. Yeah. I will say this yesterday. I was walking down the street, and I saw someone in a I'm Aware of the Little Dumb Dumb Club T-shirt, and so I was like, oh, yeah, nice. And so I gave them the old look in the eye, and they just fucking looked down at their feet

and walked on in shame. Story checks out. Not a lot of eye contact going on with podcast listeners if you know what I'm saying There isn't Literally like tonight I'm like Tonight I'm walking around

like with you guys and down the street I went to get a sausage roll so I didn't get too drunk Oh fucking Pete Evans An activated sausage roll I think I'm being

the right sort of guy I'm walking around going hey thanks for coming everyone's like who the fuck's this guy I'm being the right sort of guy. I'm walking around going, hey, thanks for coming. Everyone's like, who the fuck's this guy? I'm like, you've got my name on your shirt. You've got his phone number. Yeah, what more do you want? Will, you put out a stand-up special on Stan, on the streaming platform Stan last week.

I just saw this on your Twitter. A lot of people have been tweeting you that when you finish watching the special, it says, now that you've watched Will Anderson fire at Will, how about you watch one of these eight seasons of the Powerpuff Girls? What the fuck's going on there? I mean, well, I am also a Powerpuffer, I guess. Is it all your routines about sugar and spice and everything nice? I'm not really familiar with the Powerpuff people's work, but I think it's more about...

It's 2017, man. Yeah, exactly. That show has dated very badly. What I'm saying is I'm guessing people who get stoned and watch my stand-up are maybe the sort of people who also fucking get stoned and watch the Powerpuff Girls. That's great that the algorithm has cracked it that quickly within like a day.

I mean, I've never been involved in one of those if you like this, you'll like this sort of things. Apart from that racist Harold Sun cracked it that quickly within like a day. I mean, I've never been involved in one of those, if you like this, you'll like this sort of things. Apart from that racist Herald Sun thing before the... Yes! Did you guys talk about this on the podcast? No, we haven't yet. It's pretty in, but I think it's funny enough. Well, the Herald Sun wrote this article, and

it was like, I guess they were trying to do something positive for the comedy festival, but they just got it so fucking wrong. It's the best. It's so good. It was basically just like, if you like this person, you'll like that person. But they just went all racist and shit on it. So they're like, if you like Ronnie Chang, you'll also like this Malaysian guy who's coming out. And then they said, he's horarious.

Yeah. Yeah. But, but, but. I mean, I know that's the sort of thing they'd say on this podcast. No, for the Patreon bonus episode, not publicly. It said, he's herrarius, and you're like, what the fuck? And then they wrote in brackets, yes, herrarius. But the best thing about it was, because it went around on the night it came out,

and we're all messaging each other going, what the fuck is this? The herrarius thing, people didn't find that until a couple of hours in, because the first part of that paragraph just said, all aboard the Oriental Express. And so I think most people read it and went, what in the fuck is this? No need to read the rest of

the paragraph. Surely it's not going to get more racist after that. And then it was like hours later of skimming through and going, wait, there's more at the end of this. There was literally so much there that like two hours later we're still finding bits going, wait, there's more at the end of this. There was literally so much there that two hours later we're still finding bits like, kill all Jews. That wasn't even jumping out. They're not even talking about

the most racist one of all, which was, if you like Will Anderson, you'll like Dave Thornton. Yeah. Give this up. I was like, that is fucking bullshit. You will only mildly enjoy Dave Thornton. It's crazy. Give this little guy a chance. It's getting 400K a year to do breakfast radio.

Try him out. I was with Ann Edmonds when the article went up and we were looking through it and we're scrolling. It's just a delight. Every category is just awesome. And then it gets down further and it's like, if you like Carl Barron, you might also enjoy Xavier Michaelides. And Edo just goes, this one's just baldness.

That's all it is. Because it's like, if you like Carl Barron, he's knockabout, you know, like, oh, what's up with fucking ladders, you know? You might like Xavier. And it describes Xavier's show from four years ago, which is imagine Walt Disney got frozen and sent into the future and I don't know what fucking else. Just his bizarre show from four years ago.

He's like, that's nothing to do with ladders. Maybe they're big fans of that original segment from your show, Carl Barron's Corner. I feel like you know the show better than these guys. Shall we bring our next guest on? Yeah. Do you want to do a bit of Harold Sun style? Okay.

All right. Give me a second. What's something really bad to say? If it kills, you can use it in your solo show in half an hour. Fuck. Fuck. I hope it's half an hour. All right.

Hey, if you like... If you like... Yeah, if you like... If you like... Yeah, if you like ten Carl Barons... You may like our next guest, Dirk Gysinger! Hi, Carl. Hi, Tommy. Hi, Tommy. Hi, Will.

Thank you. Thank you for my present. You're most welcome. I appreciated it very much. But I did say as I walked on stage, I'm about to talk about this and teach you a very important comedy lesson. Don't give content someone just before they go on stage.

Everything is lessons. Everything is lessons. My Herald song, I actually did get to do. You were in the article. I just remembered. Yeah, my one was, if you like Harambe, you will like... Go. Get off.

It's not getting better than that. Just go. Drop your microphone and quit comedy. Go back to Sri Lanka and tell them all of this day. Great. Yeah, let's get proper comics on, not just warm-ups. Let's re-edit the gala

before it goes on air tonight and put that joke in. Wow, I'm so unhappy that Will's come on and told the story before we get to say, how'd you get that? Yeah.

Just quickly on the tea towels, it's called, like, thinkkitchenlounge.com.au. Shut the fuck up. Wait, wait. Hey, we're trying to give as much heat as we can to Rich Young, not fucking whoever else. But guess what? Kitchen.com.au, thinkkitchenlounge.com.au, remember that.

Hang on, wait. Surprising. We've gotounge.com.au, remember that. Hang on, wait, wait. Surprising. We've got Kitchen involved and Dill's into it. Feel like we've got the new Big Kev over here. Big, Big Kev. Do yourself a favour, molly stuff. Big Kev. No, but this is genuinely true.

I just got told that they sponsored Josh Earl's podcast. They gave him money to be featured on. They gave him money? His crowd's about as many people as are on stage at the moment. Maybe that's why they don't give you money, because of comments like that. I mean, the good news is you've got those massive tea towels there in case your anus starts bleeding

clean up arsehole yeah yeah surprising it doesn't say something like that on there it's clean up cunt but not clean up arsehole I have a bone to pick

with you guys obviously yeah make your own jokes we've come to a post fat joke era where everyone's already I have a bone to pick with you guys, obviously. Yeah, make your own jokes. We've come to a post-fat joke era. Everyone's already calibrating the jokes in their head. But you gave out my email address on your lovely podcast. Guilty.

It's been nice. The KFC vouchers were good. Keep them coming. I'm not going to lie. What's it like to have your personal information given out like that? Yeah, this is what I was throwing out. I think we can bond over this, Carl, because you and, you know, your phone number's out there,

my email's out there. Tommy has nothing out there because he's in charge of the edit. Yeah. Right? So he gets to... So even if I say dasolo at gmail.com... Yeah. Right? That's going to get cut out.

But also... Ah! Just making a lot of noise so it peaks in the edit bay so I can see where the bits are cut out. Ah! Cool. Always a good sign for the podcast when even you don't want to listen back.

But Carl, I think that's where you always come undone. There's no way for you to get it out. But you know how every comedy festival there's a running theme throughout the show? Yeah. Maybe this year's festival, every live show, we'll just mention that Tommy's number is 0419. Ah!

Just everyone, just get out your phone and start tweeting 0419. Ah! Start tweeting 0419. You're older than him. No, that's what I meant, tweeting, putting it out there. I want it to start trending. What I love the most about this is that you've written the details on your hand,

so it's like you've met him at a bar. And his name is Teatowel. I met this cute little girl with a moustache and I think I'm in love. Just read that number one more time. What for, one nine? Nah. It's like you're standing on scales. I was trying to bond with you, you fuckhead.

Listen, I've been trying for six years. It's not worth it. It gets you nowhere. Should we get our third guest out here? Yeah, sure. Folks, it's been a while since this guy has been on the show. Very excited to have him back. Please welcome back into the little dum-dum club, Stephen K. Amos!

Oh, am I going here? Right. I mean, maybe I was meant to move before, but I didn't move. No, no, I felt like, yeah, I just, yeah, I felt like I should be in the corner. Yeah. Nobody puts dildo in a corner. Dildo, you're calling yourself dildo now. That's my nickname, yeah. Dildo. That's what Adam Richard calls me and it's been stuck i've been working oh no it's been stuck has it that's what that's actually

this is true that's what he calls you that's how he uses you i uh i went to a gay trivia night we did introduce a guest but i'm sorry yes sorry what am i fucking chopped liver no yeah you're the greatest. Thank you very much. Welcome to their podcast. Save the black till last. I was also in... Dil's not proper black.

You know what? This is Australia. We have to ease him into it. That's what Adam Richard said to me. That's what Adam Richard said to me. You know, the best thing was I was backstage with Stephen and you were talking about the Coastal Me podcast and how you're going to Coastal Me and all I heard Stephen go was,

What? And you've got merchandise. What the fuck? Well, you've never had a strange man pay to fly you somewhere exotic? Oh, I have. But I haven't got T-shirts to prove it. Been there, done him, got the T-shirt. Yeah, so we are literally, we've got no fans in Thailand,

but we're flying over to do a podcast there. We're getting more people there than go to our Adelaide show, our Solo show, anything like that. We've got 70 people, I think, going there at the moment. Well, that's amazing, but I'm sure they've obviously seen your shows before, and that's, you know, not enticing, is it? No, I've seen your flyers.

But the option to go to Thailand for a holiday fucking hell and a couple of cunts thrown in it's a big deal isn't it and I was also I'm glad you picked up on the Herald something because they featured me oh what was that one

have you seen this negro see another negro I think that was the gist and the guy they compared me with was that one? Have you seen this, Negro? See another Negro. I think that was the gist. And the guy they compared me with is a lovely guy, very famous comic from South Africa, but his name is...

Louisa Goza. Louisa Gola. We're nothing alike at all, apart from colour of skin. Yeah, really nothing alike at all. You from colour of skin. Yeah, really nothing alike at all. You really are. I forgot. Well, because I hadn't seen him before the other night, but I've seen

his show and I've seen your show, and now I realise how much more racist it was. Yeah, that's the best thing about the article, is once you put aside the racism and all the rest of it, they're just horrible recommendations. Like, even if you did go, right-o, you fucking wouldn't enjoy any of the shows. Can you imagine

the people who've seen Carl Barron on the footy show for 15 years and rock up at Xavier's fucking show? Putting a fucking cabbage up his ass or whatever. And most offensive, you three all get a mention. Guess who fucking does it? Yeah, because

Hemorrhoids didn't do a comedy festival show before. If you don't like yourself, you might enjoy... That reminds me, I did a show at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival which Will you've been at many times and I was staying in a

These guys invented their own festival I know How's that working out for you? Well hey we get booked for more festivals now Thailand

Yeah Merchandise Singlets $25 Oh yeah it's going to be the only place where no one will buy your merch they'll just buy merchandise, singlets, $25. Oh, yeah, it's going to be the only place where no one will buy your merch. They'll just buy the knockoffs of your merch. Hey, that's not a bad idea.

I'm going. I'm still starting a business. So I get into this flat that I've rented for the month and on the wall is a massive oil painting of a gollywog. All right? Yeah, you hear my pain? I'm like, what the fuck? So I told one of my comic friends,

that you probably know, I won't name her, and she was like, oh, really? And I said, yeah, there's a massive gollywog over the fireplace. And she said to me, are you sure it wasn't a mirror? Not going on there. Fuck! That's a friend of mine. Does she work for the Herald Sun?

Probably a good time to mention that the official Little Dumb Dumb Club gollywogs are now on sale after the gig, if anyone's keen. A friend of the show, Daniel Sloss, suggested that after shows I sell Dilrub Jai Singer a wobblehead, wobbleheads. That's quite racist. I like the idea of just living with it. Ring it up differently so it's a wobblegut. So instead of a head, you've got it like halfway through. Well, he's already got the Daniel Sloss wobblecock.

It's like one of those birds drinking water. Or it's like the, what is it, the things on the, the perpetual motion where you've got the balls like knocking back and forth. Oh yeah, you just whack the balls and it just goes.

It's actually like that one they have at the Griffith Park Observatory and you can tell where the fucking equator is by the thing that's hanging down. Well, I talked last week

about the up-killed shot that I took of Daniel Sloss at Nick Cody's wedding and someone suggested that I go and get it 3D printed and just see how it comes out. So I might pop down to Officeworks next week. How long's that gonna take?

That's what she said. You're gonna get your cock 3D printed? Yeah, no, Daniel Sloss's cock. Oh, good. In case you thought this was weird. No, someone else is without their permission. You know, Irish comedian Daniel Sloss. You can kiss it like the Blarney Stone afterwards.

Fucking hell. I mean, you could put it over yours and wear it out on stage as a sort of like... They'd be like, oh, look at him, he's slossing up. Oh, yeah, that's not bad. That's not bad. It's like he's gotossing up oh yeah that's not bad that's not bad it's like he's got a sausage and he's

and he'd be like put it on your forehead put it on your forehead that's not bad either like a fucking Dalek but if you're looking for cock I mean

I mean on this stage right now daddy's here yeah yeah and some say that is actually a really good pick-up line for him because he loves taking stuff from his parents.

Got me. Hang on, I'm getting a call from Tim. All right, Tommy, come to daddy. How did this turn... We've said that before, though. How did this turn from a... We've said that before, haven't we? Come to daddy.

Yes. Remember prison? How did this turn from a story about me... Brings a whole new meaning to mummy's purse, doesn't it now? How did this go from a story about me going to Officeworks to me cruising this stage for cock? When did that happen?

We've had you on the podcast before. Do you remember being on our podcast before? Yes, and it was not like this. It was very civilised. Oh, was it?

Oh God, yeah. It was with Ronnie Chang and Luke McGregor. Yeah, yeah. Where are those two fuckers now? Yeah. Hey, yeah. It was with Ronnie Chang and Luke McGregor. Yeah, it was, yeah. Where are those two fuckers now? Yeah. Hey, Dil.

It must be like if you watch The Simpsons, like, season three and four, and then you just tuned out for ten years, and then you switch back on. What the fuck's happening now? What happened to the characters? It's all gone to shit. Yeah. I have no idea, because I'm always constantly amazed

when I come to this wonderful land of yours and the language you use on podcasts, the topics you talk about, it's fairly disgusting. What do you think we should be talking about? What can we class it up? Love, compassion. Let's just remove all the symbols of hate.

Shut up, Ken. class it up love compassion let's just remove all the symbols of hate shut up can't he can say that because they're both you know what on on the gala uh not both of us yeah well deal beforehand and steven on the real bit don't have two ethnics on. What the fuck? Maryborough represent. If you like Reclaim Australia rallies,

you might enjoy the little dum-dum club. I honestly said this. I said to Stephen beforehand, because I knew the podcast has changed a lot, I actually said to him beforehand, I made a point of just going, look, at some stage there'll be a race crime on stage. Yes. I love how you're denying it, Carl.

No, this is news to you Is it Well to be honest I'm usually drunk I don't remember what happens Oh look at Carl Disguising racism Casual racism

And you wonder why No fucker turns up to your show Actually speaking of that At the end of my shows Let's all go to his show No let's not No let's bring a group of black people, Asian people, Chinese people, and go sit in the front of his show and look at his face and not laugh once.

Oh, no, the white audiences do it anyway. Yeah, we do not want to bring in foreigners to take jobs from white people who are unimpressed by this. Yeah, and also, you know, haven't they suffered enough? At the end of my shows, I plug both of you, because, you know, I feel bad for you. Who, Stephen and Will? I appreciate it, Dil, and the bottle of wine.

But two nights ago on Saturday, or Friday, sorry, I started saying, you know, Dungeon Club, go see Tommy Dasolo. And when I got to Carl Chandler, someone literally started booing. Can we recreate that moment? Yeah. So go see Tommy Dasolo, dinner for two, yeah? And also, also Carl Chandler was in your face, bitch! Still the best reaction the show will have

during the show. Oh, and by the way, Dill, great show the other night. This is a story that I got told this morning and I had to bring it up. So, a friend of mine, he's a new comic. He was over in Germany, in Berlin, but like three, four hours outside of Berlin, in a tiny village.

And he met this guy. This guy, he found out he was a comedian. He goes, oh, where are you from? He said, Melbourne. And this guy, this German guy said, do you know Karl Chandler? I'm not making this up. He goes, oh, yeah.

And that German guy, they've been speaking German, he said, Karl ist großer Fotze, which directly translates to, Karl is a massive cunt. 100% true story. Who's this guy? Some German dude. So apparently... Your main audience is ex-Nazis in Paris.

They really like your jam. This guy is never getting booked for an open mic again. No, no, the German guy, I think he's okay with that. Ich bin ein Maryborough. Hail Chandler. Wow. Wow, that seems so... Did you just put your hand up there? In a Hitler style?

Even the Germans have removed the symbols of hate. I've got to tell you, in my house in London, I've got a Bosch oven, because I'm quite successful. But I'm pretty sure the advert for it did not say German ovens successfully cooking since. I'm pretty sure the advert for it did not say German ovens successfully cooking since. What I love is you thought on this stage you had to name the type of oven to be successful. Just the fact that you have an oven.

Yeah. Yeah. This cunt doesn't use the Ziggy lighter out of his car. What the fuck? We got a fucking aristocrat up there. Yeah. Fucking bullshit. Yeah, alright mate,ocrat up there. We got bullshit. Yeah, all right, mate. You got an oven.

We've all got shit going on. By the way, I like when Dil was reading out that German thing. That German phrase was written on his hand as well. So literally the two things on your hand are my phone number and Carl is a cunt in German. All for one nine. That'd be great. I mean, what a great night for someone who wakes up with Dil,

turns over to see the hand Yeah Maybe they've had too many drinks here at the show They get intoxicated by him afterwards and you just wake up and you see that

and go What have I fucking done? I don't think you'd have to see what's written on his hand to think What have I fucking done? I wake up a lot in the morning looking at my hand

Oh Is that some sort of masturbatory joke? It was an attempt at. Let's just say he couldn't get it up. Apparently this German guy was at Spleen and one night you had been performing and just started going him for being a Nazi. So he declared you...

You know your top stuff. You know your crowd pleaser stuff. You were doing your future gala set yeah can I warm up next year for the gala or oh please

yeah Das Gala yeah well if I was going for being a Nazi isn't that good that's like not pro-Nazi that's anti-Nazi

it doesn't make me a fucking hero I don't think he appreciated being referred to as a Nazi I think that was his issue with it I don't even you know what That's like not pro-Nazi, that's anti-Nazi. It doesn't make me a fucking hero. I don't think he appreciated being referred to as a Nazi. I think that was his issue with it. You know what? This is a sign on me. I don't even remember saying that.

I say so much bad shit, I don't remember that. That's not a good thing. I don't think that's also a defence in court. Your Honour, I say bad shit all the fucking time. How would I know if I said that? I'm a comedian. I didn't mean that shit. Knock, knock.

Who's that? Burglar. It's a joke. No, the judge would be like, you are not a comedian. Hey, I would love the judge to come down and check out the show at 4.30 to judge if it did some work. I could do it with one more sale. No, no, no. We've seen the audience leave at 4.35.

So we do a lot of research here on Little Dumb Dumb. Don't do you. Surprise to fucking prize. Whatever this is, this will be great. It will be good. Oh, fuck. So I do do a lot of my research on... Oh, do you?

That's a callback. So again, edit point. Oh, do you? Fuck him up. What's his number again? 419. Leave a bit of a gap so people can cut it out and use it as a ringtone if they want.

Oh, do you? There we go. Nice. So... When he said people, do you think he means... Well, it seems like it's going to be going off a lot this week, so it may as well be a pleasant sound. Come to daddy.

I've been single for a few years now. I'll take anything. Which is the nicest pick-up line Tommy's ever had. Which is the nicest pick-up line Tommy's ever had. So, I do my research in a place called WikiWorth. Say that again. That's not quite nice. Do it again.

WikiWorth. WikiWorth. Or anything. Basically, I Google the guests on the show and I write, how much is such and such worth? And I get to a lot of cool websites that way. So, I'm doing a mix of sites called WikiPiki, CelebHubs and VIPFAQs. And I looked up Will Anderson.

Okay, Carl, just before that, how's your prep for your solo show going? Maybe write more jokes. Maybe more people might show up for that. Doubt it. How many spam bots do you have on your fucking phone would be my question, but... So, go on.

All right. So, Will Anderson. He's a multi-talented man and everything he has ever tried in his life, he has been able to pull it off in style. Our man checks out so far, I guess. People often get mesmerised by the talent this man has. Now that is what I call comedy.

That person's jaw literally dropped. That's how mesmerising it is. And obliterated. They were mesmerised. You can't hold a drink when you're fucking mesmerised. That's how mesmerising your talent is. You weren't hold a drink when you're fucking mesmerised. That's how talented, that's how mesmerising your talent is. You weren't even doing anything. You were just sitting there. Fuck.

That's amazing. Fuck. Where's Milan? Where's Milan when you need him? His book called Survival of the Dumbest had some serious sarcasm in it. I hate that non-serious sarcasm. But also, what the fuck? I wrote a book like 15 years ago.

That's all right. Okay. He is none other than the gifted Will Anderson. He was born in a place called Hayfield in Australia. He belongs to the nationality Australian. And it is obvious from that that he is born in Australia. Not actually born in Hayfield, born in Sale, the Gippsland-based hospital.

Oh, this site's starting to sound shit. But otherwise, I can confirm, born in Australia and an Australian. I've got a feeling you've got some more stuff coming up that you're going to be happy with. Yeah, get rid of the email admin at wikiworth.com. He's been very successful in his career

and his talent has guided him to the perfect places at the perfect times. However, his exact net worth is not available right now

but coming to this far he has been excellently wealthy. Is this your way of saying thanks for coming and doing our dumb show? Because you're right.

I should not be here. But it's fun. Yeah, for free, dickhead. No, you're getting paid. It's not heaps. Describing about the Will Anderson height, weight and inside body fat. Oh, here we go. Yeah.

Now I'm a little bit more fucking interested. Get ready, snowflake. What is my height, weight and inside body fat. Oh, here we go. Now I'm a little bit more fucking interested. Get ready, snowflake. Why is my height weight an inside body fat? There is no doubt that he has been blessed with mesmerising smile and good physical structure. Mesmerising again? Is there a robot in love with me?

Well, it hasn't broken any glasses this time around, so the smile can't be that mesmerising. Good physical structure. Come on, someone smash a glass. There's enough people drinking. Bartender, smash a glass. Yeah, in Carl's face. See, now he gets it.

Imagine if you'd whipped that out five years ago. I don't think the audience would have gone with it. He is a tall man as he has a magnificent height of six feet. Six, two and a half. Right. Is six feet magnificent these days? I'm not sure if it is. I feel like this website...

Come on. When he finishes puberty, he might grow some more. He might have a growth spurt. So, being followed by his followers in his social accounts widely, Will Anderson shirtless pictures gets tonnes of like. What? While it's simply... Firstly, I'm not sure...

There's one. I know there is actually one shot in this picture because I was playing celebrity theatre sports with Peter Burner and a bunch of other comics. Tommy Dean maybe. I can't remember who.

Say no more. It was like 15, 16, 17 years. I thought you said celebrity. It was 15, 16 years ago. Right. And we was at the Inmore in Sydney as a big fundraiser and we played some sketch scene

where the other three all took off their tops and I'm not a top taker off here in public sort of guy but suddenly you're in a fucking No, but that doesn't even work. I am proving it. I'm proving it right now by having

look, I literally have unnecessary layers of fucking clothes on. And I brought another jacket. I dress like a pass the parcel. I'm almost the never nude. And then these three other guys

have got me in a non-consensual improv situation where you're on stage and you have to yes and. Well, you know what improv?

I have the right to fucking say no about my own body. Just because they're all like yes and. No! Sexual fuck. Anyway, I took it off. And there's still to fucking say no about my own body just because they're all like yes and no. Sexual fuck. Anyway, I took it off.

And there's still a photo lurking around on the internet. There is a photo somewhere on the internet. Nice. According to here, it gets tons of like. Yeah. He has a great body and he looks...

Just to interject, Kyle, there are other people here as well. You're coming up. I assume this is building to some massive punch in my face so

you all get a mention don't worry you don't know Carl as well as the rest of us do but he would never read anything this nice if it didn't have

a terrible fucking face this is like Manchester by the sea you know some bad shit's about to happen Manchester by the sea bomb

yeah good pun known associates of Will Anderson you know some bad shit's about to happen Manchester by the seaboard yeah yeah good pun known associates of Will Anderson are Rolf Harris Andrew Muirhead oh yes we went to school together

so you could actually say that how old were you? the right way. I dare say that's where the rest of those shirtless photos are. Anyway, read out Tommy's phone number again because that bit's getting cut out as well. Offer one nine, you got that part. So, he has a great body and he looks red hot

when he decides to go shirtless. His six-pack abs Does a lot of talking Lies Prove it Prove it Yeah what I learnt from that was A I don't have a six pack abs And B

Look at fucking me If I had abs that could talk They'd have their own podcast Look at these cunts Why did you turned me into? We broke him. We broke him. Stockholm.

Stockholm syndrome. It's real. The great Welsh comedian Stephen K. Amos. I love when people are like, I can't believe that people would ever be brainwashed into cults. I'd be smarter. I've noticed the signs. You didn't.

Look at those idiots voting for Trump. One little Dundum Club ticket, please. Hey, Stephen's just following orders, all right? I think you'll find those days have gone. Yeah, let's gang up on Dil. Is there a Will Anderson action figure? We would like to think so. Well, hang on, Dassler's going to Officeworks

with Slosser's action figure. Oh, you know what? Just make Slosser's cock into a Will Anderson action figure. Oh, yeah. Give it a little cool haircut. Put a few layers on him. With same talking abs, yeah. They're both six foot.

Very good. And they get a lot of like. And it's mesmerising. If you look it directly in the eye. Look into my eye, look into my eye. Sloss's dick does a lot of sit-ups. Is Will Anderson still alive? Are there any death rumours?

Yes, as far as we know, Will Anderson is still alive. However, being younger than 50, we hope everything is okay. I like that it's we. There's a team of them. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey guys, do we reckon... Yeah, okay, cool.

Yeah, yeah. Alright, things are fine. Last question for Will. Is Will Anderson gay or straight? 67% of all voters say Will is gay. Make it 68. I'll add it to 69. Make it 69 and people will see Tommy's show.

And then dinner for two. So, 67% of all voters say Will is gay. Now, Stephen K. Amos' same site. Is Stephen K. Amos gay or straight? 60% say that you are gay, meaning more people think you're gay than Stephen K. Amos is gay. Isn't that amazing? Hey, hey.

I would say it's mesmerising. Don't listen to those meanies on the internet, Daddy. They don't know what they're talking about. Now, just to finish the whole roll-up, I punched Dilruch Jaisingh into VIP FAQ, and it said, who? There it is. Although, under that it said,

if you're aware of Dilruch Jaisingh, you may be aware of the little dumb dude. No, it said, you may be aware of Dilrub Jaya Singer, you may be aware of the little dumb dude. No, it said you may be aware of Smorgies. Smorgies? That's a bad reference. Oh, your first one ever. The people at Ollie's Trollies will be ripped off and you can get a shout out.

Oh, he's probably getting some money from Smorgies. He used to say Ollie's Trollies. He's probably getting some money from smorgasbord. He used to say, oh, he's trolling. He's updated his references out of the mid-80s. By about three years. Should we get, we have one last little thing. Oh, we do. We do have a, because we are talking. Excuse me, excuse me.

I'm quite upset. Sorry, what about Will? No, no offence to Will, but you gave back ten minutes of Will's life in that website and one fucking question for me. Who would have thought that a comedian is needy? That's weird. Shut your face.

So, where are my statistics and facts? You fucking lazy shit. I did look it up. There wasn't enough funny things to read out. Oh, a black man can't have funny stats. Is that what you're trying to say? That's what they're saying.

I think that's what they're saying, right. It's amazing how you threw your voice looking in that mirror. I can't believe I'm... I can't believe I'm saying this, but I apologise for not hanging enough shit on you, Stephen. Well, that's what I thought this was all about. I know. That's called equality, Carl.

No, but also, you say hang enough shit. Yes. Will's stuff was quite good stuff. Yeah. And at the end, a bit of shit. Yeah. So that's not the same. And also, your bit of shit was that he might be gay.

What are you trying to say? Exactly, homeless folks. That is actually... Gee, a homophobe. Gee, I've got to go get ready for my solo show, guys. A racist and a homophobe. I just read it out. I don't write the sign. I just read it out.

Yeah, but once again, the white straight man gets all the fucking stage opportunity. Yeah, come on, guys. Let's get him. No. Yeah, let's all go down to my show and get me. We're not that desperate. And believe me, no one can get those jokes. I mean, if the choices are fight international evil or me time,

fucking me. We have been talking a lot about the Coastal Movie Podcast Festival, so we thought it was apt. Boring. It was right. Someone is not going to get an invite. He says what we're all thinking. He's real cut up about it as well.

Costa Moe fucking podcast. Well, officially, sorry, to give it its proper name... What is it? The Rich Young is a fucking idiot and his shit-ass YouTube channel, Costa Mui Podcast Festival. But we do have an irregular segment that we have on the show, so we'd like to introduce our segment, Xavier's Corner.

Yay! Thank you. Thanks, everyone. Go for it. Fashion. Topics. Popular culture. You're standing in Saviour's Corner.

Welcome to this special Koh Samui version of Saviour's Corner. Brought to you by kitchenlounge.com.au Tea towels to clean your filthy cunt Rich Young Investments Call me a fuckhead, I'll give you $2,000 100 Rat Strippers Mummy's Purse Ask first, Mummy's Purse Ask first, Mummy's Purse And Kyle Chandler's Comedy Festival Show

The widest, straightest, roomiest show at the Comedy Festival Here we are in Koh Samui They have their own distinct culture and language Oh, shit. Here we are in Koh Samui. They have their own distinct culture and language. Here's a local now. He sees me drinking the local beverage. Prove it, prove it, prove it. Let me buy you a drink, you fucking idiot.

Of course, Tommy and Carl want to visit Samai for two very different reasons. Tommy to visit the ancient temples. Hey guys, do any of you monks want to race me at Mario Kart? And Carl to visit many of his secret families. Let's speak to some of Carl's children now. Hello little clang Chandler. Swazi hawk cracked you all. That's time for Gidday Dickhead., little clang Chandler. Swazi haw cracked you all? That's tie for g'day dickhead.

And little dumb cock Chandler. Did somebody say duck curry sandwich? Of course, religion's very important and part of Koh Samui's culture. Oh, look, there's a giant Buddha statue. Oh, wait, sorry, my mistake. It's Dilruk. Because you're fat.

Alright, um... Oh, look! We're gonna visit Kosmi. We'll not be complete. We're gonna visit the famous and prestigious restaurant Cafe 69. Does everyone know that reference? God, I hope so. This whole joke's based on this. Carl, you said

everyone knows it. Hope they do. Anyway... I'm talking to the owner this. Carl, you said it run noser. Hope they do. Anyway. I'm talking to the owner now. Hello, sir. Can I taste some of your famous Cafe 69 fare? Sure, I'll close my eyes. I'll feed you a dish. But then you have to feed me a dish at the same time.

Okay. Hmm, okay. Well, this feels more like an entree than a main. Oh, wait. The main's going up my bum. I'm really sorry, but I don't do this sort of stuff usually. Like, I don't... They asked me to do this, and I really don't agree with it.

I'm sorry. I'm with you. I like Carl Barron, and I also like this. I thought this was Carl Barron. Some of Carl Barron's best. Now, sadly, Saviors Corner won't be at the Koh Samui podcast. We've been called unqualified and unfit. But, Will, we heard here that you give opportunities to people

who are unqualified and unfit. So maybe you can help us out, hey, Will? Great. Where there's a out, hey Will? Great. Where there's a will, there's a way. Thanks everyone. You've been standing in Saviour's Corner. Saviour Michaelides everybody.

Now that is what I call mesmerising comedy. It's nearly 4.35. I've got to be honest with you, after that I am now 72% go. Alright, that's all the time we have for the Little Dumb Dumb Club for this week. Folks, give it up for Dilraba Jaisia, Stephen K. Amos and Will Anderson. Thanks so much for listening.

If you don't want to see Carl's show, I'm on at 6pm. It's much better better so come to that alright guys thanks so much for listening and we'll see you next time see you next