The Little Dum Dum Club with Tommy & Karl - 346 - John Safran & Dave Thornton

Episode Date: May 22, 2017

Fat Covers, Auntie Chandler and Dave Hoofter. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Today on The Little Dumb Dumb Club, a brand new episode with John Safran and Dave Thornton. But before that, we've got a few things that we need to tell you about. We are two weeks out from the Rich Young Is A Fucking Idiot and His Shit House YouTube channel, Koh Samui International Podcast Festival. Kyle, I've just realised at the point that we're recording this, we're about to go into Triple J and be interviewed about this podcast festival. How are we going to be able to say the full title of it on the air? I mean, this guy's paid us two grand.

We owe him that. We should be getting him promotion on Triple J. You know why? I don't know whether we can call – I mean, I don't think that other people's taxpayer dollars are going towards us calling a stranger a cunt on the youth broadcaster. Well, you know what? We can't anyway because they don't advertise on Triple J on the ABC station.

If we advertise one fuckhead with a YouTube channel, we have to advertise all the other fuckheads with a YouTube channel. He's too much of a big commercial business, Rich Young. So everyone will have the bloody ombudsman in. It'll be on Media Watch. Bloody Andrew Bolt will have his say. We'll get taken down for being in bed with big shit cunts. Big shit YouTube channel.

So, yeah, look, Rich, Rich baby, I'm sorry about you missing in on one tiny little opportunity, but you understand. And welcome to everyone who's listened to this episode for the first time because of John Safran being on it. Yeah, that's coming up. You're enjoying what's been happening so far. Skip through this if you must, but I wouldn't.

I'd say this is, I'm planning on being really funny in the next five to 20 minutes. Yeah, I'm planning on giving a seven out of 10. So let's see how we go. Yeah. So we do have those, if you listen to this straight away, we do have two weeks to go. And like we said last week, you know, if you last week you know if you guys are crazy if you guys are fucking devil may care listeners um you'll be signing up right now at the last minute and coming over and joining us for one of the biggest podcast festivals to happen in southeast asia

since god knows when uh we will be headlining it we will be doing uh bits and pieces all all through the the four to five days it will be be there. Oh, wait, I've made an error. I was saying it's two weeks when we're recording. It's one week when people are hearing this. It's even closer. Right. So this is the last, like this time next week, when you're hearing the episode, we'll be at the airport already.

And if you're coming, you'll be at the airport already. And if you're flying the plane, you'll be at the airport already. Hopefully. So, yeah, one week to go. Sorry. Gee, time goes fast. This is how it goes in my head when Thailand's coming. This is DeLorean podcasting.

Yeah. So a week to go. A week to go until we take off. And please, you know, come along if you've got any chance. If you're one of these crazy people who I've been wondering about for the last month or so, these crazy people who get this close to the festival happening and going, I've A, not only got the money, but B, got the time up my sleeve to do whatever the fuck I want.

That would be awesome if you did that. Get on it. It's going to be great. Not only that, but I did ask the question last week. I said, who are these people and what decisions are they, you know, what's their excuses to be able to come over? And I did get a message this morning from someone saying – you asked how people justified this trip to Samui. I told my wife, quotation marks, it's the Aussie Woodstock of comedy. So I'm hoping that's the –

Were there a lot of Eccentric Serbian billionaires At Woodstock Is that the original Woodstock Or the one they did in the 90s That was sort of real shit A bit shit

And people got murdered I think Jamiroquai played at that Right And I think people Died at that one I think that was Bad news that one So yes

Yes it is So yeah If you're one of those people That have the time and the money, please get on a plane. It's going to be once in a lifetime. And these people that – we get a lot of messages from people going, oh, I'll come to next year's one.

It's like there's been no indication we're going to do another one. Yeah. Honestly, I can't see how we would do another one. Like this is – I disagree. Honestly, I can't see how you're not going to get to the end of this having gotten an excuse to go to Thailand, basically have your flights paid for and not be wanting to do this every year, nay, every six months from now on. I'll give you a little clue into my mindset.

The money thing is not something that's, you know, I'd go anyway. It's not like I'm busting for someone to sponsor me to go over there. I'm just going to go anyway. Yeah, exactly. But I don't need to drag everyone else every year. I just go by myself. So look, if it became a big massive thing, sure. But I think at the moment there is absolutely no plan to do it again.

It's – we'd probably be looking at a different idea, something else. I reckon I should get the say of the next destination if anything. Sure. Well, if you can be like me and come up with such a great idea that makes this wave of support come our way. Sure. Sure. Great.

Okay, yeah, so get on it. It's going to be a lot of fun. Yeah, this is, I mean, yeah, nothing like this has been done before that we know of. We are trailblazers. Exactly. You don't see radio shows doing this. Generally, if anyone goes over, you have to win a competition or something.

This is just us saying, come and watch us do a show in Asia. It's going to be heaps of fun. Can't wait to get over there. And look, a last minute shout out to the people that we see on our Facebook page. You can look up on your stats on the Facebook page where all of your likes are coming from. There are like two likes from Thailand. If you're one of these people, hit us up. If you're one of these people that actually live there.

Get in touch. I love the idea. There's a couple of Aussies that have been messaging us about coming and they're from Cambodia. Yeah, right. And they were like, yeah, we're going to come because it's only an hour away. Yeah, it's quick. It's very quick.

And then now I think the last message was they were like, no, we're not going to go. Like, yeah, we're only an hour away. Just do it. I reckon there's going to be some sort of like there'll be someone in our midst when we get there or there'll be someone who's come over that's going to be a bit of a surprise or a bit of a weird thing. Right.

Like I'm banking on one of our listeners having, do you know what I mean, like something up their sleeve where they've thought it'll be funny to come and do this in some weird way and not tell us about it. I'm saying this as sounding as if I have some kind of inside tip. I don't. But I'm predicting, yeah, I don't know. I don't know. I'm thinking there's something.

It's going to be a little surprise there for us. I wouldn't mind betting. You think maybe Dil will be there? Imagine. So that is actually a last minute reminder just to say who is on it, by the way, that we don't mind betting. You think maybe Dil will be there? Imagine. So that is actually a last-minute reminder just to say who is on it, by the way, that we don't usually do. So we are flying over. Thanks to all the generous, generous benefactors,

not only Rich Young but all the other listeners that have been chucking in at our GoFundMe page. Almost $7,000 at this point when our target that we thought we might luckily get to was two. Yeah. Which is crazy. Which is great. Which you are funding guests, accommodation, a cameraman to come over and film everything and turn it into a doco. Yeah.

So excellent work, guys. Breast enlargement surgery for me once we're over there. Yes. Look, I think you look pretty just like you are. I don't think you need to do that. You'll always – I won't be looking elsewhere. You wouldn't enjoy doing the podcast with me more if I had a big old pair of melons that you could just stare at.

You are right. That's a good point you make. Yeah, so Dilraba Jaisingha, Nick Cody and Tom Ballard are coming over with us. And, hey, there's some latent negotiations going on, potentially some others. Yes. You know, there's a lot of people that, you know, had expressed interest, but, you know, stuff, the industry that we work in is such that, you know, stuff comes up at the last minute and it's kind of all over the place. A couple of people are now, you know, looking like they were going to come

and not able to come, but then on the flip side, there's other people who thought they wouldn't be able to, who potentially now can. So we'll see. We'll see who we end up with. It'd be great to get drop-ins over that side of the world. A real open mic international podcast festival. Should we do this?

Speaking of GoFundMe, you know, we do our – what's coming up soon is the bit where we read out a few Patreon subscribers for the week. Fantastic bit. Yeah. The only good bit on this show. So what maybe we can do is read out a couple of comments that people have sent on the GoFundMe site.

Oh, it's not bad. Yeah, okay. Because people have been chucking in money all the time. It's been constant, which is awesome of you guys. Thank you so much. But there's been room to leave a few funny comments and whatever. So let's read a few of them very quickly. So $10 to someone called Sheila Beback.

First name Sheila, last name Beback. That's great. $10 from them saying, hopefully this bumps Cody up to first class. No, we're not fucking paying for something like that to happen. $69, very popular. A lot of 69, yeah. Yeah, Kevin Kelly's chucked in 69 and said, please find out how many bookings are made under Tim.

Yes. Thank you. And what else have we got? A lot of, man, so many people have chucked money in, which is just ridiculous. But like we've said before, you are also going to get access to all the bonus content that we're going to make over there.

And it really is a bit of a working holiday for us because we're going to be filming and a lot of stuff and doing a lot of audio stuff and whatever. So you'll be getting all that. We're going to be busy over there than we are over here. Totally. Totally. We're going to finally be making, you know, earning our money. Yeah.

I like the guy who said, normally my income goes towards feeding my kids, but those cunts have had it too good for too long. Yes, yes. That's excellent. And a few comedy novelty names as well on there. There's one person who's called himself, first name, Carl's parents, second name, our brother and sister. So that's appreciated. And it sounds so much just like a real name as well.

That's the clever thing about it. I think it's the Thai name. Dr. Ramsey's chucked into the box. He's back. Not Dr. Dr. Ramsey, but just Dr. Ramsey. So, yeah, thanks to all those people that have done that. Thanks for the continuing chiming in of those funds. It will be very well spent on the

biggest podcast festival to hit Koh Samui of all time. I'm tipping. Yeah, that's a big call, but we'll have to wait and see how it pans out. Speaking of people chipping in to our coffers, the Patreon, we're also using the money for this month as part of our fundraising for the Curse of Moody Podcast Festival. And if you chip in, if you're chipping in this month,

if you're someone that currently subscribes for the month of May, May or June? Yeah, May. As long as you subscribe, if you subscribe before May ends, you are in for the bonus content that comes out in June. Yes. Go fund me, people. If you subscribe by the time that you and I are landing on the fine shores of Koh Samui on May 31st,

if our coffers are full of your coin by then, then you will be getting all of the bonus content that we are literally filming already at that point. Yes. then you will be getting all of the bonus content that we are literally filming already at that point. Yes, yes. And as part of all this, what we do is we get on this program and we read your name out if you chip into the Patreon.

Of course, you get the bonus episodes and the bonus magazines as well, but you do get your little names right out. So we do five a week. So let's get on to the five this week. Let's count them down. Number five. Number five.

A long-term fan of the show. Here we go. Someone that we have had much to do with. A beautiful young lady that comes down from New South Wales and comes to the Melbourne shows that we do a lot of the time. Someone who's given us dolls before. Oh, yes. Given us cookies and brownies.

Pauline Hanson. Yes. No, honestly, she has been with us nearly from the start. Yeah. Yes, we've, she, no, honestly, she has been with us nearly from the start. She has been, we've seen her grow from a little girl into a beautiful young woman. It's been, we've seen her blossom before our eyes. Thank you. I just want to say no blossoming has happened before my eyes.

That's an audio recording that gets played in a court case. All the blossoming happened behind closed doors that we were not anywhere near. Hey, if I'm going to die in Koh Samui, I'm going to go out swinging. So thank you. You're going to scorch the earth on your way out. Thank you too. Steph Warden. Thanks, Wardo.

Thanks, Wardo. Yeah, Wardo regularly, I think pretty much the last three or four years, has made the trek down to Melbourne for the comedy festival. A lot of times when she's been, I think, basically underage. Again, just none of this needs to be on the record. No, but I'm saying that is such a big effort of hers to be coming down. Because I got a bit scared. She was coming down at 16 and stuff.

Well, I believe her and her friend for Schoolies a couple of years ago, that was what they did, was come down to see our bullshit, see friends at the show. They're one of these people who does the right thing, listens to the show every week. When she gets an opportunity, she comes down, she sees all the regulars, all the regular dum-dums. She's been to Melbourne, she's been to Sydney shows,

she's been to Canberra shows. Yeah, that's the other thing. When we're in Sydney, which is closer to where she lives, she comes up and sees us do our solos even though she's already seen them. Yeah, and laughs, which I kind of find a bit weird. She's already seen them all and she still laughs. I'm like, wow, that is almost too supportive compared to everyone else that listens. Interestingly enough, she was, I think, 16 when she started listening to this show.

She's 45 now, which I think is a real great advertisement for the power of this podcast. And she's still blossoming at 45. Stop saying blossoming. Thanks, Wardo. Thanks, Wardo. Thanks, Blossom. Yeah. Thank you.

Another blossoming person who I've never met, but I'm sure they're blossoming in their own right, especially with such an interesting name. Thank you to Patreon subscriber Jake Zalm. Jake Zalm. Z-A-L-M. Zalm. Zalm.

So he's given us Zalm of his money. Yes. Thanks for the Zalm of your money, Jake. I keep thinking of Billy Zane, Jakey Zahm. Zahm, I've never seen that before. What sort of a life do you lead when you are definitely the last person? Yeah. There's not too many Zed last names, are there?

In the phone book, in roll call, you know, everything, Zed. What kind of life? Write into us and tell us how you think That has affected your life Yeah Tell us the difference Between you and your mate Jake Young

You know Just being one letter down Yeah In the alphabet But honestly It would affect you in some way To have a last name With the letter Z

At the start of it I really do think that Yeah I think that's It's interesting I like any name That kind of stands Stands out Has a bit of pizzazz to it I've just never heard That name before I don't even know do think that. Yeah. I think that's... It's interesting. I like any name that kind of stands out.

Has a bit of pizzazz to it. I've just never heard that name before. I don't even know what ethnicity it would be. Yeah. I don't care to speculate. Zed.

I mean, Zed I always associate with the Polish for some reason. Okay. I like a good, you know, as some people would say, a bit of a scrabble frenzy

on their name. Oh, yes. Like a Zed, but then a B straight after it. The Polish love that. ZB. I don't know how you pronounce that. Yeah.

There's not enough room. Maybe. Anyway. Thanks, Jakey. Thanks, Jake. All right. Here's someone, one of the few Patreon subscribers that seem like they have a sound effect in their last name.

Thank you to- Rodney Boyoyoyoyoyoyoyoy. Thank you to Josh Pap boyoyoyoyoyoy Thank you to Josh Papow Oh nice So it's like I just realised It's like Shane Bourne

Has given birth to this guy It's Shane Bourne Crossed with 50's Adam West Batman Yeah yeah Papow Thanks so much For your money there

Josh Papow Thank God Your money's in here. We've just said goodbye to Dave Thorne. It's a shame we didn't have him in here for this, hadn't we? Oh, yeah. Wow. Josh Papow.

Thanks, Josh. Nothing more needs to be said. I think that's everything that needs to be said with that. Number two. We've got a fair bit to play with these names. It's been quite a fruitful bunch of names this week. And these are randomly taken names. But this guy did message me.

He was one of the fine young people that remind me to say, put my name on. I've subscribed for a few months. Put my name on. P.S., you've got plenty to work with. So here we go. Yes. Thank you to Patreon subscriber Sam Silcock.

Anything? Sam rhymes with spam. I think that's funny. Yeah, spam, ham. Ham. Goddamn, Sam. Sil. Sil.

Sylvia Plath. You idiot. You're fucking stitching him up Sil. Sylvia Plath. You idiot. You're fucking stitching him up there. Silver, not gold. He would have copped that Sylvia Plath thing in primary school. He would have copped that from a young age. And cock, the thing that gets real hard and then slides in and out of a pussy.

Or butt hole. It's 2017. It's 2017. Someone's finally invented anal sex Or mouth Yeah Or another second butthole Some people have them Inside the tip of another one

Yeah Inside a cushion on the couch Yes Yeah Inside an animal Yeah Hey, people are into it Yeah

How many people have listened to this show Do you think fuck animals? That's a good It'd have to have been one, surely. Statistically, this is it. I mean, we say this a lot, but I get worried because the more that numbers go up, the more listeners that you have – I mean, it's good. Growth is good.

You want as many people to be listening to the show as possible. Yeah. But then at a certain point, the numbers are against you and you go, there must be some really fucked up people in the mix here. You know what? Let's, you know what we should do? Let's do a dumb,

dumb, fuck a pig. Ask straight after that. Let's wipe ourselves down and do this. Let's do a dumb, dumb census. Oh, that's good.

Where we, we send it out and we don't go, you know, where do you live? Yeah. How old are you? How old were you when you lost your virginity? Yeah.

It's all questions. Have you tried anal? Have you? How old were you when you lost your virginity? Yeah, it's all questions like – Have you tried anal? Have you – yeah, have you tried anal? That's the only question on this shit. Big box in the middle. Have you tried anal? Yes. Where?

Have you done anal outside or inside? No, wait. Save that for the next four years' time. Right. No, this is the sort of thing I would put in. Have you killed someone? Yes, okay. Have you been in jail?

Yeah, okay. Have you done anal? Have you, yeah, fucked an animal? Probably related those to the question before that. But that would make it even more interesting if there was a yes and a no. It is good. It would be good to get a bit because we don't really know anything. I mean, like you're saying, Facebook, we can look out where people are from.

You can sort of look through their photos and go, okay, this is the kind of stuff they do. But I really want to get, and also social media only accounts for statistically out of the actual number of people that listen to this, a very small kind of slice of the pie. Yeah. But wouldn't it be interesting to find out if we have listeners that have killed someone or just have been in jail?

Yeah. I think that's interesting enough. Yeah. I dare say definitely. Definitely. It has to. Maybe not killed someone or just have been in jail, I think that's interesting enough. Yeah, I dare say definitely. Definitely. Maybe not killed someone, but definitely been in jail. Yeah. Can you listen to podcasts in jail?

I doubt it because you're not allowed internet, right? Are you? I don't think so. I'm pretty sure you're not. Maybe if you commit some cool white-collar crime. Yeah, yeah. I mean, surely in jails now you have computers and internet to some degree. Not if you've done real bad stuff. But surely, like you said, white-collar, you go in there for tax fraud.

You go in there for, I don't know. Well, hey, this is the sort of thing we can find out from our listeners. Yeah. Maybe there's been people in jail who've gotten into this show while they're in there, but they don't have internet in there. They get like a podcast conjugal visit. Yes. Where someone just goes and brings them an iPod with one episode of this on it.

Or someone who has been selling cigarettes off, and then someone's gone, I'll give you a couple of podcasts for a cigarette. And they've gone, I don't know what the fuck that is, but okay, I'll try it once. Or someone on the outside baking this podcast into a cake. Yes. Yes. Or someone bending over in the shower to pick up their podcast and getting savagely bummed.

Copping a podcast in the side. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Getting a real patroning up the backside. Thanks, Sam. Thanks, Sam. Wow. How do we have Silcock to play with when we got that far off? Yeah. We got to prison. Yeah, prison assault.

Should we do a live podcast in a prison like Johnny Cash in San Quentin? Oh, not bad. Wouldn't that be the worst? San Quentin. Okay, one more. Last one. Oh, we've got time for one more. We've got one more.

The fifth one. Okay. All right. Okay. Well, like I said, we had a lot to play with with the names this week. It's the same that we've ended on a bit of a plain one, I guess, after we've built up. After Silcock.

Yeah, Silcock, and even Zahm. Zahm was interesting. And then, of course, Steffi, who we personally know. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, right. It's a shame. You'd sort of think end on the best one. Yeah, well, usually.

I mean, but I guess it's a bit like, remember the Letterman top tens where number one would not always be the best one. It would just be the out. Yeah. Yeah. So this so this is the out yeah this is just the out okay this is just the um so you know we don't have to go on too much about this one it's just just the out we just get out on this one i guess uh thank you to should i should i break down the name first name last name or just just look at you're looking at it whatever you think is best way to read it out okay all right uh the fifth Patreon subscriber this week. Thank you to Patreon subscriber Sperm Dude.

First name Sperm, last name Dude. Yeah. All right. So littledumbdumbclub.com. Yeah. Thanks for chipping in, Sperm. You're right. Yeah, thanks for chipping in, Sperm.

You're right. That is remarkably like the Letterman Top Ten where number one isn't – it doesn't have to be the best. Yeah, it's just your natural out. I mean, is that a natural out? Well, I mean, in terms of what he's talking about, it is kind of a natural out, if you know what I'm saying. Yeah, well, I don't think – you wouldn't start with Sperm Dude. I just feel like, you know, what more is there to say

than Sperm Dude has put in 10 bucks? Yeah. I mean, you can have a crack if you like, but… No, no, no, I'm not questioning you at all. I just, yeah, it's interesting. You're right, what more do you say? It's all there in the title. Yeah, I mean, Dude is, again, like Papow,

I've never heard that as a surname, but, you know, it takes all types. And, you know, I wonder if Sperm Dude's ever been in jail. And, hey, we'll, you know, here at the Little Dumb Dumb Club, we take on all comers. Yeah. I mean, if you want to chuck into our Patreon, come along. Come along and be part of it.

Definitely. Definitely come. I mean, in this case, you know, us, the hosts, and in this case, I assume our list is very white. We're very, very white here on this podcast most of the time. I think this podcast is all white. You're right. Yeah.

And it is – a lot of people have said it is a jizz-tastic podcast that we do. Sperm Dude sounds to me like he'd be a jack of all trades. Certainly handy around the house. What? Okay, yeah. I think Sperm Dude would – you know, it's actually a dream for him to chuck money in. Is his name, it doesn't really, is it clear what he does

or is it a little murky, a little cloudy? It's a dream. It's a dream for him to chuck money in. It is a damp on it. Boy, we're enjoying this. I mean, we're really just lapping up this, aren't we? We are just gobbling this up. Well, I mean, some people will question the name and say it is

a little bit hard to swallow that that is someone's actual name. But believe me, it is true. It is absolutely true. Some people probably spit out at this point and go, no! That's not a real name. Some people probably prefer this name to be splashed across

their pits. And again, a fond welcome to anyone who's a fan of the author John Safran, who's read his books, who's watched his insightful television programs and joining us for the first time. Or just racists that are looking for something to have on him. But let me tell you, sperm dude, we'll be using your ten bucks to go out and buy ourselves a nice big cream pie for us both to eat. So it's money well spent mr dude thanks so much for your continued support oh i just i don't know i feel like i've got a i've got to vet these names a bit more it's

nice to have a bit of protection at the moment right suddenly It's a real humdinger of a name, that's for sure. I mean, I just feel like, I don't know. You feel a bit weird that I've inserted this one at the end? Mm-hmm, yeah. Right up the end? Yeah. You've inserted... My head hurts.

I'm trying to work out going bareback in the one, but it's just – I was trying to put together something about us riding a horse. All right. All right. Thanks, Berm. Let's scrunch this up like a tissue and throw it away, throw it into the bin.

Yep. Okay. Thanks for everyone who throw it into the bin. Yep. Okay. Thanks for everyone who chips in on the Patreon, the GoFundMe for the Koh Samui International Podcast Festival and all this stuff, littledumbdumbaclub.com. You can also buy our t-shirts that are helping to support the trip. They look great. Go and get one of them. Get the t-shirts.

Tom, you can see the box of t-shirts that we still have as we're speaking. You know what? The singlets are going a little bit quicker than the shirts. Interesting. And it's basically winter here in the southern hemisphere. So that's how popular they are. People are buying singlets and they don't even need them yet. So, hey, guys, warm up those poor little shoulders of yours and get a t-shirt as well,

especially because with a week to go, I'm a bit scared we're going to get stuck with them. All right, guys. Yeah, littledumbdumbclub.com for all that information. Enjoy this week's episode with Dave Thornton and John Safran. Hey, mates. Welcome once again into the Little Dum Dum Club for another week. Thank you very much for joining us. My name is Tommy Dasolo and sitting next to me is the other half of the program, Carl Chandler.

G'day, dickhead. Now, people will have heard this on the show last week, but I met your parents in your hometown. Yep. And I didn't say this on the episode, but we were in your childhood bedroom, which is now a spare room, and there's like a pink doona cover on your bed that's got little flowers on it and stuff, and I'm just mucking around in front of your mum, and I go, oh, yeah, they've still left the same doona cover on from when you were in here, have they, mate?

Yeah. And your mum turns to me and she goes, oh, don't be mean. And I just wanted to say, how about a bit more of that 30 years ago probably would have done the trick, I reckon. Getting wrung out for being too mean by the mother of Carl Chandler. Jesus Christ. See, I'm not like that around her. She thinks I'm just a beautiful baby little boy.

I feel like it was a real missed opportunity to really get to the bottom of what's going on here. Like I wanted to try and get you out of the room so I could have her alone and go, now you tell me what you think parenting is. Because I have a lot of questions. She's lovely. She's really nice. I'm not quite sure what happened with me. It wasn't

her fault. Well, two great guests today. First of all, you know him from Fox FM Breakfast. It's our old pal Dave Thornton. Hey. Thanks for tagging me in because I was like a horse in the stalls with that anecdote. I was trying to jump in hardcore. I now know why you left Maryborough at a very young age.

You couldn't keep up that facade for that long. I was like, this is 17 and a half. I was like, oh, I've got to be a cunt. I've got to get out of here. Like Vesuvius about to erupt. Yeah, it's like he met someone in the street and they just went, I went down to Melbourne. You can be whatever you want down there.

You can be gay. You can be an activist. You can be a total cunt. Wait, wait. What was that last one? I mean, to me, I'd say like Macaulay Culkin in The Good Son. You're flying a kite at night doing all that weird stuff that she can't see. Whispering to yourself, can I take it?

Can I take it? And just trying to get out. Just waiting for podcasting to be invented. stuff that she can't see. Whispering to yourself, G'day Dickhead, G'day Dickhead, and just trying to get out. Just waiting for podcasting to be invented. Also on the show today, speaking to the centre of getting to the bottom of what makes people what they are, just examining real monsters and holding them up to a spotlight, the author of the new book, Depends What

You Mean by Extremists, it's John Safran. Thank you for having me on. Yes, great to have you back. It feels like we, at the moment, we kind of really only get you in here when you've got a book out. Oh, that seems like aggressive. I want you to write more books so we can have you on the show. Oh, yeah.

So to me, I thought it was like you were making out with like an a-hole. No. Like Carl. No, no. And like I only came here For a very calculated Cold-blooded cynical reason No Not at all

I'd come in I'd come in whenever you'd want Oh great Good to know Yeah good Alright you'll get the call next week Yeah You don't know what doors you've opened now John

I get texts three times a week Cody's hung over again Can you come through Yeah exactly Exactly No thanks for doing it Because we did It's not often we do this,

but we had to go through your publicist to book it all in. Oh, really? Are you like – so is there a bit of also that extra hostility as well? A little bit. That's not my fault. I can't do like side – you know what I mean? Like I'll get in trouble from Penguin Books if I sort of like on the sly do anything. Yeah, totally.

And I know how it all works with book publicity because they've got to claim X amount of sort of like on the sly do anything. Yeah, totally. And I know how it all works with book publicity because they've got to claim X amount of sort of points. It's like a frequent flyer system or something like that where every bit of media they get, they get to collect it and sort of put on their little list and go, look what I got for you. A little gold star on the fridge. Yeah, so wear a little gold star.

Ah, awesome. Well, hang on a second. You're classified as media? Yeah, yeah, exactly. In the net gain of media, you may be a loss. Exactly. So when they present it back to you at some stage or to your management or whatever it is, it's like, yeah, A, is this really a legitimate form of media?

And B, we came to you. You didn't get this, publicist. And while we're on the publicist thing, we were told that we were going to get a free copy sent to us so we'd know what we're talking about and all that. Yeah, I didn't get it. So none of this is John's fault, by the way. I'm just bringing it up. It just seems like a shame that all I did was go out and write a book

but now it's like I'm presented as the out-of-touch Hollywood type in my ivory tower. One of the hosts grills you about not writing enough books. The other host grills you about your choice of publicist in the whole matter. No, I'm used to this gotcha because yesterday I was on Jewish Community Radio. Oh, nice.

There's this really right-wing show, like really right-wing, and they wanted to talk about my books. I went on and then in the middle of it, like I got a gotcha, like one of the people I write about in the books rang up. Oh. Yeah, and he just like put straight on air to kind of like complain about the book. Right.

And so because he's also very right wing and just thought, you know, just broadly, you know, just. So what's the complaint? What was the complaint? I think there was a bit of professional wrestling about it where he wanted his voice... Didn't get his free copy in the mail? No, no, no.

He wanted to be on the radio and sound outraged. Right, right. So you say it was a gotcha call. So this guy who's in the book, what, he was calling up, pretending to be, like, an Indian restaurant or something? No, no, no. He pretended, like, pretending to be offended by my presentation of him in the book.

Well, I started reading the book, and last time we had you on the show when you'd written a book, I was halfway through the book that you'd written then and you, over the course of us talking about it on the podcast, spoiled the end of the book for me. Oh, yeah. So I'm treading very carefully here. But so far I have noticed there's a lot of like it's all about you going and meeting these extremists and like UPF people and kind

of both sides of the argument and everything. And quite often you're kind of presenting what people have said to you but then you're kind of inserting a bit of your own commentary and your own kind of thoughts about them into it. Do you worry about them then reading it and being like, this guy's just – because there's so many people in this book and I would worry that you put it out and then you must feel like now there's this laundry list of people that are just going to come and knock it and crack their shits at you.

Yeah, I kind of thought everyone would have a better sense of humour about it. As it turns out, the far right, a United Patriots front who wants a white Australia and sort of has issues with Jews, like somehow has a problem with some of the aspects of this book. How many famous racist comedians are there? They don't have a rich history. I mean, maybe you can tell me off air. What about Kramer?

Oh, yeah. That's true. Yeah, right. Michael Richards, yeah. Yeah, okay. Well, there's one. So you're saying all those people. What do the UPF have to say about your publicist?

And look, I would say that maybe it's just a very canny publicist trick because it has meant that we've both gone out and bought our own copies rather than waiting for the free one in the mail. So I've raced out down to readings in Hawthorne this morning and gone through 90 pages this morning very quickly. Have you really read 90 pages this morning? Yeah. You haven't taken any of that in.

No, I haven't. What's the name of the main guy in the book? John. He's good. It's John, isn't it? Yeah, right. Yeah. Well, yeah, because I went and bought it at a bookstore in the city

and the woman who sold it to me was telling me, but the cover of it is you kind of on one side of the book and half your face is cut off. And she said, oh, originally on the cover it was going to be, his face was cut off, he was on the left side. But then at the last minute they ended up changing it so that his face is on the right-hand side of the book. And I go, how do you know this?

And she goes, John came in here and was telling me this. And I go, oh, did he do like a talk in here or a book launch or something? And she goes, no, he was just in here just talking about the book. Yeah. So you're just going door to door. Yeah, drumming she goes, no, it was just in here just talking about the book. Yeah. You're just going door to door. Yeah, drumming up business. No, it's good.

But do you know why there was two covers is because there was one taken in the middle of the journey where I was like, I'd been eating, I hadn't been eating healthily, you know, and been drinking beers with, I'm not blaming it on all the far right and their beer drinking way. But so that photo was a bit, it was quite puffy, you know. So then by the end of it, and this doesn't really end it, but I start going to this Israeli martial arts place at the end of the book and then through that.

Oh, another spoiler. Because I'm interviewing the dude and then through that I lost some weight. So then I said to Pengu, I go, listen, it's just you've got to let me. You can't put the puffy face picture on. You've got to let me with my new svelte face go on the front. Oh, interesting. So do you just have a different story about the cover for every bookstore that you're going to door to door?

No, no, no. That's the truth. Okay, right. I find that interesting because, you know, if you look at the picture of you on the book, you can't really tell how much you weigh. There's about a quarter of your face on there. Oh, yeah, but the other one was, no, if I showed you the other one,

you'd be on my side. Oh, because in this, in the new one, you've got your head up, your chin up, so if there was going to be a double chin, you wouldn't be able to see it. Yeah, yeah. You've actually – you're sort of doing a duck face. Did you take that yourself? Is that a selfie? No, but it is.

My friend took it. It's like outside the front of my flat. So the other one was actually taken outside this pub in Bendigo after one of the far-right rallies. Right, right. So that was in situ. Very close to Maribor, near my mum. Yep.

I came from Maribor. I dropped into your bedroom. Yeah, exactly. Why are you so keen to tie your family to the UPF? I just know Bendigo pretty well when you were talking about Bendigo

in the book like you're coming down being chased by racists or whatever I was like I know that street it sounds like your mum could have straightened

him up anyway why are you all being so mean but I guess you don't want to look like pudgy especially on the front cover to look like

hey I think he really enjoys hanging out with extremists. I think they won him over to be honest. Yeah, they've given him a good feed. So sorry, the first photo you're in Bendigo. Yeah, and the photo was actually there was this shorn-headed chap hovering behind me. Like I took a selfie and it was like one of those

lucky situations where there's a skinhead hovering behind you lurking. And so that was it. But then Penguin said, oh, the skinhead's too scary, so they stripped him out and then it was just like my puffy face. It was out of context. So there was more sulking. I sulk so much about their cover, like where I was going,

can I put my thinner face on there? And you got your way. Yeah, I threw sulking. Is that a bit of book number two clout where it was like, you know, book number one they'd be like, you know, you're an unproven entity in the publishing world. You know, what we say goes. Yeah, no, it was a lot of sulking.

Because you've done that other trick too. Like the first book you did, there's no photo of you on the cover. Yeah. This time. They had a reason for that. I don't know. Too scary? I don't know why they put me on this one.

I was happy with either or whatever. There was actually a picture of this cool – not this cool dude, this uncool dude, but he's wearing this Australian flag. He's almost like he's in the Blue Man Group or something. And he's wearing – what do you call it? Leotard kind of material. Those things that go all over your whole body. Yeah, and it's like the Australian flag.

I thought that was going to – A moth suit, I think they call it. Moth suit, that's the body. Yeah, and it's like the Australian flat. I thought that was going to – A morph suit, I think they call it. Morph suit, that's the one. Yeah, so I pitched that, like that dude or whatever, but they said, no, no, you have to be on the cover. Right. So I want to ask this to John, because is it Murder in Mississippi? That was the last book, wasn't it?

Now, with both books, going through the publisher, is there like – you're putting yourself in danger? Is there a fund or like because no doubt they would give you, what do they call it, a forward for writing a book. They give you money. How much is that, by the way? But is there danger money? Is there money where they're like you're putting yourself

in an extreme situation? Are you taking that yourself or there's a publisher like, you know what, we'll sling you a couple of hundred if you snap your back in some kind of yeah yeah generally like i i don't tell them all that i'm going to be up to you know what i mean i try to because it's just going to start problems you know if i say what it's that you know uh forgiveness is easier than beg for yeah oh no like they knew what the book was about i was going to turn up to rallies. But like I definitely didn't like say, oh, and then I'm going to go to the after party with the neo-Nazis.

Or you didn't say, I'm going to go to Bendigo. They were going, oh, fucking hell. Yeah, there's not like a Monday morning working progress meeting where I kind of like turn up and tell them. But there would be a little bit of that, surely, wouldn't there? Because generally editors hit you up and go, how's it going, John? Oh, yeah, yeah. But you just sort of like send it in and just, you know,

they don't ask too many questions. Right. What I've just realised is my question reflects the environment I work in commercial radio where they're like, yeah, you're getting that, Rowley, and if you get hit in the face, that is great gear. I don't want you to go deeper. And I've realised that there are businesses out there that protect

the people that work for them. Yeah, you should turn this book into a commercial radio show. That would be something. Yeah, get all these guys on the air, start pranking them. Oh, what, Jono and the Extremists? Yeah. Well, yeah, so you're, like, it's interesting to think about, like, I was thinking this last night as I was reading it,

like, if this book, this subject matter that you're covering, if this was, like, maybe, I guess, what, like, 10 years ago when, you know, what you were doing in your career was like making these TV series where you would like go, like you would kind of really throw yourself into whatever you were talking about. Do you think, like I think it would be interesting to see like the alternate reality where you're still doing that stuff and you doing kind of like race relations and John Safran

versus God style gear about these people. Do you think that's something that you would have done back then or? Oh, yeah, back then I would have done it. I think I feel like I have to keep moving because, like, things catch up to you and, like, so when I did that stuff back then, it just seemed, like, really wild. Yeah. But now every kid's got a smartphone and he's over in Syria hanging

out with the kurds shooting a documentary for vice yeah so it's like that's what they do schoolies yeah yeah that would be yeah so there was something cool with a book you can kind of go in deeper because in some ways and because it's easy to kind of convince people to let you hang out with them like you just have a little dictaphone and you just say, oh, I'm doing a book and stuff like that. Like you don't have to pitch to them. Yeah, you don't have to get a film crew together and you go in in a full hijab and all this stuff.

Yeah, and you can be on your own, which is kind of cool. Like you can decide to kind of like sleep in the park. Like, oh, it's so late here in Bendigo, I might as well sleep in the park and then sort of, you know, and you can write about that in the book or whatever By the way that's not in the book If anyone's reading that You know like when you see a film And there was something in the trailer

That wasn't in the thing Yeah Because I'm up to the Bendigo bit now And I'm like hang on Did I just speed read through the sleep bit Because that sounds cool And yeah and you can just It's just

Yeah it seems like more fun. Like you can sneak around more. Is there points though like – and I ask this same question when I talk to people who are psychologists or whatnot. I know you're doing this and you find that interesting but is there times you go home going, I'm just really sad about this? Oh, yeah. I got really paranoid and fat.

I got really paranoid and fat by the end of it or by the middle of it. And, yeah, it is quite depressing unless you're writing a comedy book. I remember because at the first rally I went to and this person, one of the people from the far right screams out, what is he screaming? He goes, turn on the gas or something at me as I walk by. And so I write it in this article and got published on news.com and then I thought it was fun.

Like I wrote this funny article but then like people started responding like this Muslim woman tweeted me, oh, I'm really sorry, you have to put up with that. And the guy from the, you know, the guy from the anti-discrimination blah or whatever whatever He contacted me And I go oh that's right It's only funny if someone does that to me For you know my comedy shtick

Those are like actually In any other context Like it's so awful Yeah if you didn't have the safety blanket Of being a writer And being able to turn it into something Yeah yeah it'd be like Yeah

It'd be yeah If I was like just yeah Like an accountant or something That's like us That's like us and the abuse that we cop through this. Yeah, yeah. If we weren't able to spin it into something every week. Yeah, yeah.

I'd be depressed. Yeah, yeah. Oh, totally, totally. You definitely don't know what to do about like the threats that you get online. Like what do you do? Like it's hard to know what to make of it all. That's a common thing so far in the book that I'm up to

where you're going to these rallies and then you're looking on message boards and stuff and the people there are recognising you and going, which you seem quite happy about.

I've just been at the rally with Google alerts going off. Spotted. John Safran at the racist rally. Have you got headshots who want some of these guys or sign them for you?

Yeah, in the One Nation confidential, you're getting a lot of appearances. Yeah, I made it to the – are you up to the bit where the Catch the Fire Ministries put me on their newsletter, like that I've converted to – I'm up to the – Oh, yes, yes, yes. That like I've accepted Jesus and stuff? Yes, yes, because you sort of cursory at the end of it is going,

oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever you want me to say, I'm just going to go out now. And then quite a few of you have gone, we got him, yeah, yeah, whatever you want me to say, I'm just going to go out now. And then Nev Quadruple was going, we got him! We got him! Yeah. You're in. I'm only up to the bit where you've just won your first Quidditch match. But, like, I think in going back to, like, the thing of you and, like, you know, the TV show sort of style that you used to do,

do you think, like, if you wanted to do, if you were to do something like that now, do you think it would be way harder because you're a lot more recognizable and also the way that people like you were saying people can snap a photo of you and you know the kind of the whole thing of what you're doing is given up before you in a way you're just like borat yeah yeah so i reckon oh i i i just reckon i wouldn't get away with uh you know, that prank element possibly. Yeah. Because I remember even when you did John Safran versus God.

No, the one where you crucified yourself. Yeah, yeah. And I remember, like, at the time seeing it come up. Well, not crucify yourself, but you got crucified. Yeah, that must be stupid. I wouldn't do anything stupid like that. But I remember at the time, like, as you got it done, like seeing stuff on a couple of websites, like someone had gotten photos and even back then it kind of started

to leak a little bit before the show had come out. So by the time you got to that episode of the show, it was more just confirming something that I think a lot of people kind of knew had happened in some context already. Yeah, yeah. No, you definitely, like when I first started, you could do things Like assume people Wouldn't even Google you

Or whatever Like you could kind of And especially with Overseas things But then it just Changed and you just Had to like accept that Yeah before one of the shows

We did like a takedown of Anything of mine on YouTube Or whatever Like that was going to help Or just in case someone But like it's lost now. It's like, it's a lost cause. It's like Sacha Baron Cohen.

You've got to reinvent yourself and make up a new character for yourself. Get rid of John Safran. Yeah. Put a wig on, put some sort of fake mustache on, be gay, something like that, and then go out and do your work again. I try to leverage it in this book like where I try to, like where people recognise it because everyone's like radical and stuff and then there seems to be something

funny about them like talking about little things in like, you know, race relations and stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah, right. I like the thing with the Eurasians and stuff. Yeah, yeah. He's the Australian ISIS supporter. But man, I love it. You are the rarest of all Pokemons. Like you've actually willingly took stuff off YouTube. There'd be plenty of open

markers that should do this stuff. Not litter the place with the crud that you put out yeah I have videos of me that other people have on their accounts of stand-up that I'm like can we get that down like it was a very long time ago and it's not a very good clip actually and I know this is just getting off the topic a little bit but remember because we did the studio way a channel 31 show and at one stage I was trying to get the clips off and I copped a lot of crap from the guys who had put it up. They were like, oh, Duke, can you take that off because it's been close to like seven years and, you know, it's pretty lo-fi.

It's just if people don't want it coming up. Well, la-dee-dee. Have a look. The Prince has swanned in. What else would you like? Your Majesty. I reckon. Mate, you can see the boom dropping on my head.

He's interviewing a tram driver. There's a clip of Nick Cody in blackface. Can we get this off the place? I reckon there was literally about a week in between us going, how come you can't upload any of these Studio A clips to then, can you get rid of all the Studio A clips that you've put up? Because remember they would put up like 21-minute straight clips of us just going through the show when you're like, no one watches it for that long.

And it was just a heinous thing of even I think they'd kept the ads in from Channel 31 on the clip and they hadn't edited it or anything. I feel like you were on that show, John. That's where the three of us kind of all got to know each other. Studio A, Channel 31, community TV show about. You get rubbed into all that sort of crap though, surely. No, I was on 31. I was on Rove's show when he was on Channel 31. Oh, really?

Well, we were the right-wing conservative show on Channel 31. That's how we all started. We were the alt-Rove. Well, there's a bit that I've just read in the book where Nazeem Hussain, friend of the show Nazeem Hussain, makes a brief appearance in a conversation that you have with him. And it sort of got me thinking, I want to know what you're working on next because I got jealous.

I want us to be inserted into the thread, into the narrative as well. Oh, yeah, okay, yeah. Well, you've got the right attitude. There's lots of people who have your attitude. Like my dad, like he's in the book and he's only upset because he's got his picture, his picture's not in the picture page for various reasons. I can't get into the legal reasons why. My dad was standing next to someone who could no longer be

in the picture section of the book. I can't get into it. I thought it was because he actually eats a Monte Carlo in the book. I thought, is that some sort of penguin Arnott's fight that's going on where they're not allowed to advertise any sort of wear from Arnott's? Or is it because he thinks he looks fat in that photo? No, no, no. So my dad was disappointed with that,

that he was taken out of the picture section. He's not all disappointed that he's in the book or whatever. Lots of people are like my dad. It's like, yeah, that'd be cool to kind of get a cameo in the book. Why can't everyone be like that? So let us know when you're on the trail of your next thing that you're doing. Anywhere we can just give us a tip off. If we need to shave our head, turn up at a rally or anything like that,

that'd be good. Because we were hit up the other day by a friend of the show, Senator Sam Dastyari, who basically hit us up to say, can I be on the show again? Because I've got a book coming out. And don't worry, you guys are in it. So now we're like, fuck, what have we done? Why are we going to be in the book?

How funny was it with Dastryos just got into the news because he was going around Sydney rubbishing all these houses that were worth a million dollars and going, they're not worth a million, what a bunch of dickheads. And I was a bit like, that's got a dum-dum touch to it. He's going around shitting on random people for no reason. And it was funny, out of the bubble of this podcast, the general public went, that's really

cruel. And I'm like, oh yeah. That's how it feels out of this bubble. It may come across as such. He's obsessed with food that's very bad for you. He's very in our wheelhouse, Dastyari. Well, this sort of ties up a few things that we're talking about. With the

Bendigo trip and the contents of your book and even talking about Maribor early on. We did go to Maribor last week and I was talking to my mum. What I've done recently is I've unfriended my auntie on Facebook because – Why? Well, good question. I'll field this one. Because she shares a lot of anti-Muslim stuff on her wall.

And I'm very uncomfortable with it. I'm very uncomfortable with it because she's an older lady who lives in Maribor, population 8,000 people. What are you worried about? There's no one coming to bomb the $2 shop in Maribor. I would have to say she's never met anyone Muslim in her life and she's very anti-Muslim on Facebook. It's like there's absolutely no – there's all this stuff,

all these conspiracy theories about 9-11 that she puts on. And I went, no, no more. I can't be associated with this. So then I talked to my mum last week and she doesn't really – she's got very, very, very vague ideas about what Facebook is because she's obviously not on it. She doesn't have the internet. She's never used the internet in her life. And so she said to me, oh yeah

I ran into your auntie at the supermarket last week and I went, oh this will be good. She goes, yeah. She said, you must be very busy because I can't see what he puts on Facebook anymore. She has no idea. Well I can't see what he puts on Facebook anymore. There's no idea. Well, I can't figure out whether

she was trolling my mum or whether my mum has interpreted that wrong or how that works or whatever. And I said, you know that I've unfriended her on Facebook? And she went, yeah, I just played dumb. I was like, well, is it really playing dumb when you don't understand what I'm talking about or not? So I think she's sort of

putting in the vibes of of she's letting me know that she knows through my mum, I think. But you know what I mean? But I can't sort of – it's a little bit creepy because I'm quite good friends with her son with my cousin still. Oh, okay. So I'm just waiting for it to get back. Yeah, it's all going to blow up.

Sounds like I should be hanging out with your aunt. Yeah, yeah, exactly. She can definitely be in the book. Exactly, exactly, yeah. But did you draw your old school? There was just like a printout meme of anti-Muslims and she'd go to your mum. It'll be all coming through in the mail, so just enjoy that.

You know what that'll be? That'll be the Christmas card or the birthday card that I get during the year. Instead of the old $2 note put in there, it'll just be like, fuck all Muslims, just strapped in there. The old $2 note. It's been 30 like, fuck all Muslims, just strapped in there. The old $2 note. It's been 30 years. My grandma still used to do that.

At the start of the life, it'd be like, oh, yeah, you get the $2 or the $5, and then it was still that at the end, 20 years later. I'm like, thanks, Nan, but move on. I can't really get anything with $2 anymore. Also, they're not in circulation anymore. Where did you get this from? Yeah, what she's sitting on. I can't really get anything with $2 anymore. Also, they're not in circulation anymore. Where did you get this from? Yeah, what she's sitting on. That is incredible.

John, yeah, we did go to – so we went to the town of Maryborough. Last week on the show, we went down to try and track down – I don't know if you know the basketball player Matthew Delvedova. He's in the Cleveland Cavaliers. They won the NBA championship last year. He was. Won the NBA championship last year. Big deal.

He's from Carl's hometown. We got a hot tip off that he was in town. So we drove down there and sort of recorded ourselves on the road. Like we attempted to track him down to interview him for the show. It was kind of our first foray into sort of the investigative journalism realm. Of John Safran. Yeah, totally. Well, I kind of found myself wishing we were a bit more like you

because his dad works at the real estate agent and we went in there to try and find out through them where he is and they just gave us a brick wall and they just like no we're not talking to you and we just kind of we just took it and and left and i wanted if we ever do this again i wanted to get some advice like what you know what would you have done in that situation yeah we certainly didn't have your spirit no you definitely did the right thing by turning up. Like the worst thing you can do is send an email because it's just people won't get back to you and you don't know. Well, his management said that he wasn't in the country.

Oh, really? Yeah. Which is what your publicist said about you, by the way. And the second thing, yeah, phone calls not that good either. And just looking up, it's amazing how many people are just on like whitepages.com. Right. So you just, so people, there's like a bit in my book where I go to one of these far right leaders who's actually been like at the rally kind

of dissing me for being a lefty pinko or something. And anyway, so I just rock up there. What is a pinko, by the way? I think like pinko, like communists are red or something And anyway So I just rocked up What is a pinko by the way? I think like Pinko like Communists It's a red or something Right

So instead of reds It then turns into pink Why does red turn into pink? I'm not sure Yeah this is the interesting part of this You're not even full common Actually I think communists Are really good with the

Breast cancer awareness So they think Someone put the communists In the wash With a white With a white something And it turned out pink. I love that left-wing propaganda cartoon show,

Pinko and the Brain. That was my favourite growing up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because all pinkos need a brain, am I right, guys? Sorry, go on. Yes, I just knocked on his door at night and he's like really flummoxed, like really impressed by my detective work. Like how the hell did you track me down?

I can't believe this And I said I typed your name into whitepages.com And then yeah so you definitely have to Door knocking is much better You should have gone door knocking around there I reckon Yeah well I mean I think we were just really taken aback By being at the place where his dad works

And being told in so many words to fuck off And I said in the car on my way back, I was like, I bet you John Safrans and you Louis Therouxs aren't standing for that. I mean, you would have barged out the back. You would have had some kind of angle to get in there and get deeper to the story. Yeah, go on.

Could you get a bit? Oh, sorry. Get hot on that line. Yeah, sorry. Yeah, no, you did the right thing and it's just so hard. You've just got to take – I guess you could have tried to make the story something else. Like you could have tracked down people who knew him

or told the story about him. We did do a bit of that but like it was just a bit – I don't think we – weirdly enough we didn't have enough arsehole in us to really go – like to look up. We could have found his home address. Well, you drive down there, you sit for two and a half hours in a car and you go, we're going to get down there. We're not going to take no for an answer. But when someone's in front of you going, I can't help you you sit for two and a half hours in a car and you go, we're going to get down there, we're not going to take no for an answer.

But when someone's in front of you going, I can't help you out, it's very hard to tap into that thing where you go, fuck you old man, let us back there. Like, I don't know. Have you always kind of been like, you know, have you always kind of had that straight to you? I find it really nerve-wracking to do things like knock on people's doors. Yes, but I've usually got to the point of no return.

So, like, a feature story has been commissioned by The Good Weekend and, like, the editor, and they've, like, given me money to get a plane to Sydney and a hotel for a week or whatever. Oh, that's great motivation. You spend all the money first and then you fucking try to do it. And then you're like, I just feel like I just cannot not return. Did I put one too many nots? But I just feel like so much pressure.

Your editor's not with you here. Yeah. I feel like I just have to come back with something. So even with this book, so much of it would be me thinking about my editor at Penguin and I just can't. I just have to do it. It's too late now. Well, speaking of, Tommy mentioned Louis Theroux,

looking at your social media, so you've got a bit of a kinship because you do a similar sort of a thing and you can see that he reads your books now or watches your shows and stuff. Did you meet him while he was out here? Yes, yes, yes. Yeah, right. I think he met me during my fat stage. He's got the whole wrong idea about you.

I know. I really felt when, because I was waiting in this hotel in the city, in the lobby, I forget which one, in Collins Street. They were a real nice one. Oh, yeah. They're not sponsoring this. No need to give them a point. And I came down from the elevator.

I felt when he saw me, I had the beard too, so I was already wanting to throw it off, but I felt it was more like, yeah, that's not the body of John Safran versus God John. You'd think he was just watching that show going, oh, that guy's so slim. This guy's awesome. I can't wait to meet the 68-kilo John Safran.

Oh, who the fuck is this 76-kilo guy? He's thinking when he gets back to the UK, he's going to get cracking on a new doco for the BBC About eating addiction Now, John, when you eat a meat pie Would you say that it makes you feel extremely good? Oh, I did the voice I did the voice Because that is interesting

So you've got a bit of a relationship, obviously Because you I don't think it's like a Jim's Mowing franchise Going around the world You probably don't have to need to meet someone like that in every country, but you've got that relationship, obviously, because you do something slightly similar, yeah? Yeah.

So you're a fan of his and he's a fan of yours, which is really cool. Is there sort of rules between you? Is there like now that he's done Scientology, that means you can't do it? No, I don't know. There's this other dude, you know John Ronson? He's this writer. Yeah's this writer and he's sort of got in the same wheelhouse and we've done the same thing and he hasn't he like we've gone to the same shakes you know like oh right i think like the fat wire shake that i went to on versus god

is someone he covered in his book right but he was never bitter about i brought that up with him i just said because it truly was incidental, I feel, because it's like every town's got their loud mouth who's willing to say anything to the press, so it was more like I got the same shake as he did because he's just the guy he's the guy or whatever, but I did bring it up with

John Ronson because he was down here for a book festival and he said, he was like, nah, it's cool, we're cool man. You should be in a Facebook chat group Just all of you guys just conferring Just making sure but Yeah like Scientology like Surely that'd be a big there's a lot of meat

On that one where you go oh I wouldn't mind Getting onto that one first yeah I've Tried Scientology A few but it's hard to get in The door and then It becomes how interesting Can you make not getting in the door? That's sometimes interesting. Yeah, and I guess that's what he did with his movie as well

where you see a lot of him creatively being told no. I had a bit of that because I watched it on a flight so I never got to see the end of it. So there was no catharsis for me. It's literally what you just said is him going for an hour, just can I get through? No. Okay. That's not really the movie's fault. You can't walk out

towards the end and go didn't care for the ending. I'm not complaining. I'm just saying there was none. It's exactly what your point was. It was like for me the whole trajectory has just been he never got in and I left going what? There's a film called Tickled. Have you heard of that? Yeah, I've seen that. By David Farrier

which is kind of in the same ballpark. I don't know, I just thought I'd give a hyperlink to you listening. I saw that at the film festival and that guy gave a Q&A at the end of it and all the stuff that has happened at the end of the film, like since they made the film, is kind of as interesting, if not more interesting, I thought, than some of the stuff that's in the film. Yeah, it's about this dude.

And in New Zealand, he's just like... He was like if Justin Bieber tours, he kind of does the little sit-down interview with Justin Bieber. So he's not like trying to be out there or... He's like us. Yeah. And he's got like glasses or whatever. And he's like, you know, he's a nice guy,

but he's not like trying to kind of create waves or anything and then he found this story about professional tickling or something so he just thought oh this would be a nice little kooky story but so he sends out an email to them and straight away it gets all weird like they they want to do is talk about professional like they sent out like the first return email is, like, a legal threat plus saying... Coochie-coochie-coo? Yeah, we've looked at your work and, listen, this professional tickling isn't something for homosexuals and so don't think this is something, like,

just because you're a homosexual, like, this is for you. So it was, like, legal threats plus weird, like, attack on him being gay straight away. And the story just keeps on building and building to this, yeah, this professional... Dave, could you close that door? Because there's a train coming past my house for some reason. Oh, my God, it's a white supremacist float.

It's just come by. I can see why you've decided to have the door open. I mean, it is a beautiful, warm Melbourne day. There we go, much better. Yeah, and he ends up in America, like down in warehouses where they film this, and it's too strange to kind of articulate. But yeah, it's a pretty good film.

I went to, yeah, the Q&A. How do you feel about going to a film or something with a Q&A in it? Because I just, I think people given the right to ask the creator of something any question they want always end up asking the worst questions. Yeah. No, Q&As are okay. Okay. Yes.

Very diplomatic. Yeah, because you're just like weirdo. So if any weirdo has a weird question Like oh there's something in that guy I had with my book the only Q&A Because I've been going to like different bookshops And stuff like that and doing Q&A And I only got one It wasn't even hostile but like pointed thing

Where someone said Well what about women in the movement And where there was sort of like this subtext That somehow I don't know I have been told this story already By Dave O'Neill Who was at the gig

Yeah So I just I do long meandering answers As you know So I somehow said to her I started saying something But then ended up saying something else But I wasn't

Like I wasn't dodging it Or whatever It's just like my book Just doesn't really address Yeah That or whatever and then so then it gets to a question later and and there's an other woman she says yes my question is you didn't answer that first question i'm like what's my book got to do it's like like now i'm

part of some conspiracy where i'm trying to cover up something but i didn't know what it was so but then i gave them a good answer that they were happy with because it ticked there because it was in Yarraville so where it's like lefty crowd so I said on the far right they sometimes leverage like feminism to kind of cynically to kind of argue against Islam

and at one of their rallies they had a banner the far right where it's like it was like a pro-woman banner saying respect I forget, where it was like a pro-woman banner saying respect women. I forget exactly what it was. That does feel like a weird complaint for someone to put their hand up and go, there's not enough racist women in this book for my liking. We can be racist as well.

Why didn't you just make up some racist women? Make the book entirely racist women. Yeah, that's weird. Just mentioning him then, Dave O'Neill, I'd love that to be the subject of your next book. Really get deep in, because you did Breakfast Radio with him on Triple R for many years. Yeah, for sure. I want to get to the centre

of what's going on with that guy. When I heard that it had been organised, that he was hosting my Q&A for my book, I was like, what's he going to do? He's like, introducing going, hey guys, so you know, so ISIS, they're like the Sonny Boys, right?

They're all right. They're all right. They're like the pedal pop, right? That's good gear. It would have been like ISIS. Well, what high school did they go to, right? And what nightclub did they go to when they were AD? Yeah, John Safran, he's with those ISIS guys

going over there and blowing up bombs on buses and stuff like that. Get to the bottom of, because this is my new favourite thing on this show. People who've known Dave O'Neill outing him on this show, because Sean McAuliffe talked about him on this show, about how he's Dave's, you know, like his whole shtick

is like this working class comedian. But he's stacked, right? He's rich. I want to know how much money Dave O'Neill has. Every night, he rings me most of the times that he has to drive to like West Wyalong to Wagga for some plumber's fucking Christmas party and he'll ring me, oh, yeah, just on the drive seven hours to go out and do this part.

It's like he is doing some sort of three to five grand gig every night he must be fucking loaded yeah but invariably because I get a couple of those phone calls as well

where it's like he'll tell you what the price that someone got knocked back for like someone went in and they went we can't pay that

and then somehow he's gone I'll do it for half yeah yeah and he's going to be your follow-up to that basketball player? Yes, yeah. Trying to find Dave O'Neill. Yes.

It's going to be like Michael Moore-style documentary where you're trying to bring him down. And probably about an hour in before the audience is kind of going, when Michael Moore does it, it's like for a huge corporation. It just sounds like petty. This is an ex on Valdez. Yeah. This is the twist.

He earns more money. This is hooker real estate. He's doing a corporate for three grand. That's the twist, though. We discover that Dave's earning more than any of the big corporations in this company. We've got to track down his accountant. Is there like accountant client privilege where they're not allowed to tell you, disclose what Dave's made?

I hung out with his dad once because I wanted to do a story on Freemasons. Oh, yeah, yeah. And his dad was in the Freemasons so I hung out with him one afternoon and he took me to the hall and, you know, he was my way in or whatever. And, yeah, and then as soon as we finished filming, it was only about a couple of days later that we got a call, not a call, a letter sent from like Freemason Australia or whatever, like objecting to our filming and said,

oh, listen, it was 20 minutes into the filming when we realised we were being saffroned. Until they read your little name tag. Oh, it's John Saffron. My producer would have said something like, oh, no, he's serious now. Like, yeah, he's done some funny, but like he's turned over a new leaf.

And now he wants to visit the Freemasons on a purely highbrow. That's why you're having to get the documentary stuff up. You've turned over too many new leaves. Like no one buys it anymore. Can you please do that like Horatio in CSI? You've been suffering do they have any

power anymore because that was the old they've got a hospital I've always wondered about that that one in like East Melbourne

where it's like the Freemasons Hospital do they own you have to do that handshake on the way in I don't care if you've been in a car crash

that's so true I've lost both my hands well I'll ship one for you the canteen down the bottom is just supplied by the spaghetti tree down at St Kilda well asking that because you know we're stand up comedians

where you've sometimes got a premise this just won't work in a joke like have you had that thing of you're like you're finding the Freemasons and you're like, it's not working. It's not working. Like have you gone for like down and just found it's a cul-de-sac? Have you gone for an area?

Yeah, absolutely. Probably the Seventh Day Adventists, I tried to do something with them, but they just believe that you shouldn't challenge anything because God will work it out. Oh, no, hang on. Sorry. No, Jehovah's Witnesses, I mean. So you couldn't have a fight or a conflict with them?

Like they don't vote because they think that's still trying to impact on the world or whatever? You can't track them down. They track you down. Makes the filming schedule very hard. Sorry, can you stop knocking on the door? Can you come back when I've finished my shell? But I was in the car with them and we got lost

and then they got the Melways out and I said, listen, just let God work it out or whatever. Yeah, they looked a bit grumpily at me. And that was the highlight of the filming. Yeah, no, sometimes it just doesn't work. Like there's the wrong energy or something So for them there's just no friction coming back Yeah yeah so it's usually like an energy thing

Rather than anything else I guess I felt bad when I was a kid growing up We had very very hardcore Jehovah's Witnesses Living next door to us Including they had a disabled sister In a granny flat out the back And they bought her a cat Sorry bought the back and they bought her a cat. Sorry, bought you a cat.

They bought her a cat. They bought her a cat, sorry. And the cat kept coming next door. This is Chandler. What have you done to it? The cat kept coming next door and we were kids and so we were like, oh, this cat's awesome, this little kitten, awesome. And so it just went, oh, they feed me much better

than the Jehovah's Witness feed me. So it just started living with us. And so the people had to come next door and went, yeah, look, you sort of stole our cat that we bought for our disabled sister in the granny flat. You might know her as It. So, look, you can have the cat, all right? You can have the cat, but we're buying it another cat. If you could just leave that cat alone as well, that'd be great, and you can keep the first cat.

Anyway, we got the second cat as well. So we now had two cats, and then we moved away, and we took both the cats. What the hell is wrong with you? But you've sort of done the same thing, you were telling me you've done the same thing in this apartment because your neighbours have a cat that comes in all the time and there was a point where you were just de facto kind of owning, this cat would be in your

house all day and night and then you would just piss it off when it was time to get fed. Yeah, we lost the cat by the way. Oh really? So the other day there's this great beautiful cat that's next door that was coming in all the time and coming in and sleeping and whatever. But you know this doesn't happen to most people. Like this whole thing that you're trying to pass this off as, you know, there's a beautiful cat next door that just came in.

You know what this – I always realised with Chandler, he's got this shade to him. You know in movies, especially with politicians, there seems to be some southern politician who's got homespun yarns for some reason. Everyone's like, I can read into that. But your parables have no point other than you're a bit of a shit bloke. You shouldn't be telling this on a podcast.

You should be sitting on a porch sipping lemonade as you tell these stories. Well, that reminds me of a hound we used to have. It's like that story. When you get to the end, you just go, well, you're just a bit shit. Well, this person next door, so the cat... I've never seen such a mighty fine dumb cunt. This cat...

It's been a month and we haven't seen the cat and we're like, what's going on with this cat? Like, every night we'd come home and try and bring the cat inside and all that stuff. Anyway, we, the other day, a couple of days ago, we saw the cat on the road and we're like, oh, it's Archie, Archie the cat.

And so we start calling the cat and it's like, oh, wow, and it comes up to us and we go, oh, we'll lead it inside and we're literally saying, hey, Archie, you want to come inside? You want to come inside? And once you say that, it sort of races for the door. Anyway, we did that. It goes to race for the door and this lady comes out and we go, oh, it's the owner.

And we get sort of sprung. And then the lady grabs the cat and we go, oh, we haven't seen Archie for a while. And she goes, yeah. And we go, oh, okay. So it doesn't have a collar on anymore. And she goes, yeah, because we don't let it outside anymore. And we're like, oh, okay, is that bad? And she's like, yeah, we just, come on Archie

you come with me. And so she somehow found out, I think, that we've been grabbing the cat and bringing it inside and stuff and she was not happy. She did the same with Matthew Della Vadova. She just keeps him inside so you couldn't find him. A cat's that precious that you have to get someone else's cat. Like, why don't you get your own cat?

Yeah, well now we're looking into that idea. They've done a sweep of the apartment block to make sure there's no other cats. After stealing two cats of a disabled woman. Thank you. And off the day you've decided to look into some other options. I just have a thing about paying for cats, that's all. So I want to get other people's cats. Get a load of John Arbuckle over here.

So I want to bring this up, Dave, because this was a story that we talked about. We did an interstate, speaking of Dave O'Neill and interstate gigs and gigs in the country and stuff like that, we did a gig not that long ago. We did a gig in Ballarat, which is all part of the golden triangle between Bendigo, Mirabara, Ballarat.

That's the golden triangle of central Victoria. Yeah. Central Highlands. You thought the Reclaim Australia rally was bad. Chandler did a fucking gig down there. Yeah. That was nothing. Yeah.

So this happened and this links back to a gig I did in Ballarat about a year ago or so. Okay. I did a gig with Harley Breen, come in and friend of the show Harley Breen in Ballarat. And we did a gig where we were all on the post, obviously, and we went out of the pub. And this woman comes up to Harley and goes, and we've talked about this on the show before,

and goes, oh, Harley Breen, I'm a massive fan. My sister's obsessed with you. I'm a massive fan. And we're like, oh, cool. Were you at the gig? And she goes, what gig? And we're like, we just literally got off stage. We were gigging right like five meters from here.

And she goes, oh, right. Okay, well, love your work, Harley Breen. You know, love you you and i'm sort of sitting there like an idiot just not saying anything and then harley is sort of as a joke goes oh you'd obviously know this guy as well pointing at me and she looks at me and goes are you carl hoofda which we found very fascinating and funny because hoofda's not a name I looked it up There's no such thing as the surname Hoofter All there is is I think that's rhyming slang for Poofter I think that's like Harry Hoofter

You're a bit of a Harry Hoofter And so she's called me Harry Like Carl Hoofter Which I have no idea where she's gotten that from So we went to Ballarat a year later And I was gigging with you We were driving up the car And I was telling you that story

And you were just laughing Getting obsessed with it Going Hoofter! Here he, going, Hofter! Here he is, Carl Hofter! And just quickly, for anyone wondering why you get so much stage time in Ballarat, you book the gig. Yes. Oh, so much. A gig

every year. Wow. It's the only show that Carl Hofter appears in. He doesn't appear on any other poster. That shows the professionalism of Tommy Daslow. Oh, you get a gig a year. How'd you get that? You must book it.

So we went up there and we're getting obsessed with that Carl Hoofted gig. And then as we walk out, there's a heap of people that are sort of actually coming up to me going, oh, listen to the podcast. Big fan, big fan. And I'm copying that quite a bit. And Dave Thornton's going, oh, look at you with all your bloody podcast fans. Getting a little bit green-eyed, I think. No one. And Dave Thornton's going, oh, look at you with all your bloody podcast fans. Getting a little bit green-eyed, I think. No one's recognizing Dave Thornton.

Just as we walk out, just as we walk out, a girl comes up and goes, oh, are you Dave Thornton off the radio? Dave Thornton? And you're like, well, well, well. There we go. It's coming crawling back. So she goes to pose for a photo with you. As she poses for the photo, she goes, hang on, who with you as she poses for the photo she goes hang on

who are you are you dave thornton and you go yeah we're midway through a photo like you know who i am and then they start backing back from it and going no actually you're not dave thornton do you know who are you are you on the radio and they all start going and it's like hang on you you've already gotten photos with you and then you're starting to doubt. And she starts turning to me and going, who is this guy? Who is this guy? And I go, oh, that's Dave Hoofter. Man, that was such a strange back and forth because I actually think the weird thing was the chip on the shoulder of Ballarat.

Like they had that weird thing of going, oh, but then they went, not here. Who lowers themselves to this shit hole? And John got really defensive. But then it was a really weird back and forth because then I went, oh, well, I'm not Dave Thornton because I couldn't care less. Yeah. I couldn't care less.

But then they were like, oh, you are. And every time, whatever I said, they were going against. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Whichever way I was standing. They were walking against it still saying to me, like they were saying, you know, you can level with me. Like he's not going to tell the truth, but you tell me who he is.

They were just feeling weird. I think I'm mid-upload of these pictures to Facebook about to go, here we are with Dave Thornton or Hoofter or whatever his name is. Yeah, but they were going, you're too skinny. That was one thing. Oh, really? I don't know what the judge was. And then they're looking at my clothes as if what would Dave Thornton wear?

It was this weird thing. You sound fatter on radio. Maybe, possibly, yeah. Have you been recognised as anyone else before John? Your glasses, which is a thing that people very often go, oh, all people's glasses look the same. You would have got a few Andrew Dentons in your time or something like that.

Are you related to Andrew Denton? Right, through the glasses. They're genetic. I think I've got a Steve Curry. I can see that. Actually, yeah. John Hofter. And the front cover of the I've got a Steve Curry. Oh, I see that. I can see that. It's not bad. Actually, yeah. Cuz. Yeah. I can see that.

John Hofter. Yeah. And the front cover of the book, people have said, if you can show it to... The podcast. Yeah, yeah. I'll put it to the microphone. People say that I look like Bono. Oh, yeah.

With the glasses. With the glasses. That makes sense. And possibly George Michael. Yes. Yeah, it is a nice little pose. And you've got your designer stubble on, so I can see that. Who did you look like in the fat photo?

Me. Well, I reckon we'd better wrap that up for this week on The Little Dumb Dumb Club. Dave Thornton, John Safran, thank you so much for joining us. Thank you. Thank you very much. Thanks for having us. The book, Depends What You Mean by Extremists, is in all good retailers right now. What about this?

You've got an audio book. Oh, yeah, there's an audio book version of it. Yeah, did you read it? Yeah, I read it. Great. Because the last book wasn't released on audio book, except when it was released in America, it was released, but they just did it over there.

And for a while when I heard they were going to do it in America, I was like, oh, this is going to be hilarious because it's going to be like some rich voiced American going anyway you know when I walked

into Glick's Begulry in Carlisle Street or whatever but then it came out and they just got some Australian voiceover talent

in LA to do it and he kind of tips his hat at my kind of voice so it's like the worst of all worlds. It does an impression of you.

It's not quite an impression, but it is like, yeah, I went down to the top. So it's the worst of all worlds. Is that John Safran doing an impression of John Safran? He's on there in Safran's face. It's not even me. But, yeah, this one's my voice. Wow.

And also, like, you know that if it's some voiceover artist in LA, that gig has kept him afloat for three months, I reckon. That's someone from home and away that's got over there that hasn't quite gotten on a Transformer movie yet, and that's his little lifeboat. You and Gustave O'Neill put out a book recently, and by the way, I would have loved it if you guys had swapped over for your audiobooks at each other.

That would have been wonderful. But he was saying, was saying i never knew this and i find this fascinating if there's a you have to read the text exactly so if there's a typo in the first printing anywhere you have to like read out the typo oh yeah dave knows because surprise surprise his book's full of typos is that true yeah you're not allowed to anything. You sit there and the guy kind of corrects you. Like if you say very big red car, you can't make it a red big car. Like he stops the recording. And then it gets sent off to Audible and then the Audible police go through it with a fine-tooth comb and then you have to sit back again

and you feel like embarrassed that you've made mistakes. Yeah, that's bizarre. Dave Thorne, come on, give us a bit of John Safran. I don't think I can beat his impersonation of him. Yeah, yeah. But do John Safran reading out the Dave O'Neill autobiography. Oh, Jesus Christ. Reading out the Dave O'Neill.

Yeah, reading out something that Dave O'Neill would have in his book about himself, but with John Safran's voice. You've got it. You've got it in there. I'm sure you've got it. I'm trying to go through my brain and my back catalogue of 80s snacks. Yeah, yeah. Because that Paddle Pop.

Bubbolo Bill, I reckon you can do. Calippo. Calippo. A Gay Time, surely Dave O'Neill would have. And name a Melbourne suburb. So you're in Templestowe or you're in – Yeah, okay. No, where would you be?

Mentone? Yeah. Okay, okay, here we go. Was it John Safran reading Dave O'Neill's hypothetical book? Okay. So I'm in Templestowe. My dad's just knocked off some tinnies

because it's 1980s Australia I finished on a slip and slide oh the build up was very much worth it sorry mate

I feel like you should also be saying sorry to Hughsy in there somewhere as well oh my god I just saw that a mate of mine sent me a screenshot as a side note of that do you know on I feel like you should also be saying sorry to Husey in there somewhere as well. Oh my God, I just saw that a mate of mine sent me a screenshot as a side note of that. Do you know on Kiss FM, on Husey's show, you can win money being an impersonator of him. You actually just call in and make money because that's how rich he is now.

Just someone that sounds like him is also making money. You just have to be a tributary of Husey and you're going to get some of that. It sounds like Husey's having some contract disputes, I think. Like, you know, he's about to sign on for a new contract. Or who does a good Husey, everyone, that's willing to do it for a lot less? And who can do a Langbrook? Yeah, yeah.

Dave, Fox FM, if you're in Melbourne every morning. That is true. Or if you're in Ballarat, apparently, you can pick it up there as well by the sound of things. Yeah, that's right. Dave Hooft will be broadcasting out there. But also I'm at the Sydney Comedy Festival this weekend. Ah, great.

On the show when this thing airs. That will have already happened. Oh, okay. I crushed it at the Sydney Comedy Festival, guys. It was ridiculous. Catch it in 51 weeks' time. Yeah. Sorry that the comedy store needs a new roof.

Ripped it off. All right, guys. We've got all our stuff. T-shirts, information about the Koh Samui Podcast Festival and all that stuff. The Patreon, the GoFundMe at littledumbdumbclub.com. Is that very quickly worth spending one minute explaining that to John? Sure.

We're going to Koh Samui for a podcast festival in basically a week's time once this comes out. We booked it ourselves. We started the podcast festival. So we're going over there. That seems like something that would be slightly in your wheelhouse. We're starting up our own podcast festival in Thailand. There's no people from Thailand listen to our podcast,

but there are people flying in from here, from overseas to come to it. Bullshit. Yeah. Jesus. What happens if someone's killed? I think we're going to... We're going to have to find our way into your new book if that happens. What about that festival that...

You know that recent one? The Fyre Festival. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Is it going to go down like that? It's... Hopefully not. We are still looking into the insurance side of it. We are still getting, like, listeners to send us ideas about insurance and how we cover

ourselves because when we're recording this, we are two weeks out. When this comes out, it'll be one week out, but we need to really block down what the fuck we're doing. Well, in their defense, if it does go boobs up, because who was the rapper that was behind Fire Festival? Can you get a bit hotter? Ja Rule.

Yeah, Ja Rule, because I mean, in fairness, if it does all go tits up and people try to put some lawsuit on you, be like, our back catalogue of podcasts may point out they knew what they were getting into. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's not a surprise. It's not this glamping and hoping that there's going to be A-list celebrities. Yeah, let the jury see that we have 340 episodes of dumb cuntery.

Like, legally speaking, we are shitheads. There is a description of it. Yeah, exactly. Exhibit 1 through 355, I think you'll find quizzes of any kind. So we do have a lot of people coming from Australia, people from New York, China. It's going to be quite weird, yeah, but we're looking forward to it. But, yeah, you'll read all about this in your own book next year.

All right, guys, thanks very much for listening, and we'll see you next time. See you, mates.