The Little Dum Dum Club with Tommy & Karl - 444 - Live! Dave Thornton, Guy Montgomery & Dilruk Jayasinha

Episode Date: April 10, 2019

Are we back in our nation's capital? You'll have to listen to this episode to find out. Tommy has a strange waiter on his night out, Chandler reignites some long-standing beef and we rank our guests DAVE THORNTON, GUY MONTGOMERY and DILRUK JAYASINHA in order of attractiveness. We also visit the produce aisle, learn about cheat day etiquette, bid farewell to one of our favourite segments PLUS we've unearthed some "gold" from the archives of Dilruk Jayasinha... Don't forget, we have a heap of live shows coming up:MELBOURNE! We're doing another month of huge shows at the Comedy Festival. Saturday March 30, April 6, April 13 & April 20, 4:30pm.We're also doing an extra show: Late Night Dum Dum. Friday April 5, 11:55pm. LONDON! Third and final show is now on sale! Saturday May 4, 3:15pm.KOH SAMUI! Come join us for a huge week of shows at an amazing resort. June 11 - 16. SYDNEY! Big live podcast and stand-up show. July 27, 7:30pm. NEWCASTLE! We're heading your way for the first time. Don't blow it! July 28, 5pm. For tickets, merchandise, links to our Patreon and heaps of other stuff, head to our website: littledumdumclub.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Today on My Little Dum Dum Club, a brand new episode recorded live in Canberra with special guests Dave Thornton, Dilruk Jai Singer and Guy Montgomery. First though, we have to let you know about a few things. We have the show brought to you this week by our friend Greg Larson and his show Useful Idiot, which is on now until April the 21st. It's at 9.45pm in the Melbourne Town Hall. You can get tickets from comedy.com.au. Greg Larson, great friend of us, great friend of the show. Done heaps of awesome appearances in studio episodes. Done heaps of awesome character stuff for us.

Heard great things about his show. The character stuff, we tend to not really explain what's going on on the recorded episodes. So I think that's a real thing for us to get better at. But yes, has done a bunch of stuff like that on the show. Yeah, a lot of people saying his show is really great this year. So go check it out, comedy.com.au. Our buddy Greg Larson. Also, what have we got to plug?

We're in the middle of our run of shows in Melbourne. If you're listening to this, hot off the presses, yes. But we're about to go to London. We've got one or two tickets left for that. So get on to that. Then we are going to Coastal Mill. Pl've got one or two tickets left for that. So get on to that. Then we are going to Koh Samui. Plenty of room on the beach left there. What if we sold out the beach?

That'd be cool. That would be awesome. We were just a new full moon party. Sanding room only. Get it? Full pod party. So get along. June 11 to 16.

There is still time, guys. Plenty of details at our website on how you would do that, how you get the big discount on the Ozochoing Samui Resort, the host of the Koh Samui International Podcast Festival. Get onto that. Then we go to Sydney. There's limited tickets left for Sydney on July 27. And have we sold out Newcastle?

Very, very nearly. Like five tickets left or something. So basically done. Yeah, so by the time you get onto this there might be less there might be none so just get onto it

yep heaps of stuff littledunlumclub.com we've also got our solo shows on in Melbourne mine is called Balding Cherub it's 8.20 every night at the Coopers Inn

until April 21 and you've also got two Saturdays left to see Carl Chandler's One Man Comedy Factory 5.45pm on Saturdays that's it if you're in Sydney, our big show is

Stand Up Included, so yes, people ask us are you doing a show in Sydney? Yes, we are. So those same shows we're doing in Melbourne we will be doing as part of the Big Bumper Dumb Dumb Club show in Sydney. Yep, littledumbdumbclub.com Enjoy this episode live from Canberra and we'll see you afterwards.

Hey, mate! Welcome once again into the little Dundun Club for another week. Thank you very much for joining us. My name is Tommy Datsalo. Standing next to me, the other half of the show, Carl Chandler! G'day, dickheads! Yes!

Sorry, sorry, guys, I'm late. I was trying to look for a beer with a bigger opening. So, um... For people at home, there was a big opening on my beer. Yeah, you just bent over and showed the crowd his arsehole. So that was pretty cool. Some people call this the nation's capital. I'm not convinced. What do you think?

I think it's more of a territory, in my opinion. Sometimes you travel places to do a show and you're in somewhere where you're really torn because you've got to prepare, you've got to write stuff, but you're also like, oh, I want to get out there. I want to see the sights. I want to see the town. Not a problem here. More than happy to just sit in the room with the laptop open

for hours on end. Are you going to turn this place into the new Adelaide? Are we going to fuck these guys up as well? Just tell me backstage next time, do we hate this place or not? No, Adelaide's fine. I like it. These people look nice. place or not? What happens here? No, it's fine. I like it. These people look nice. Yeah.

But they just live in a shithole. That's fine. Do you prefer playing gigs in states or territories? How do you feel about where you are right now? I feel pretty good about being in a territory, I have to say. So if this goes well, we're going to Alice Springs. Is that what you're saying? Yeah.

I'd love to do a gig in Alice Springs. I would fucking hate it. Well, for him to say that about an experience, that's really saying something. My parents go up there like every year, drive up there every year. And they have a very colourful way of explaining what happened to them on the way up there and back.

Okay. Care to repeat any of it? I don't think it's legal to do that. They've just got some very old people way of explaining what they see and whatever. So whatever these people are imagining in their heads is probably correct. It's like a nice race crime, if that makes sense. Like an accidental one. It does not make sense at all.

What? Stoning someone to death but with a donut? So they at least get a little treat? It's basically them saying something, then me saying something, and then them saying, oh, aren't we allowed to say that now? Ah, right. Yeah. So, but they're learning.

They've got a thirst for knowledge. Oh, they're very woke 70-year-olds now. Don't worry about that. They're coming around. By the time they pass away, they'll be up to speed. Yeah, I reckon on their deathbed, their last word won't be an N-word. I reckon they're getting... That's your big aim for them.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. They're pretty sweet. They're going pretty well. Hey, we're finally back. Thanks for having us back, Canberra. Nice one. And a nice big crowd as well. Yeah.

This is really cool. This festival tried to put us in a 20-seat tent out in the square, and we said no. Yeah. And we thought we may have gotten too big of a venue, but yeah, thanks to so many of you for turning up. This is sick. Is there people upstairs?

Oh, fuck. Yeah. They opened up the balcony for three people. Great. One of them's got a big top hat hat on and he's polishing a rifle. So this should go down in history as one of the great podcasts. Hang on, so what you're trying to riff on there is that Abraham Lincoln killed himself? Yes.

Apparently, that is what I'm doing. Is that your understanding of American history? Yes, it absolutely is. Good thing this gig is in a university. I can really learn some things here. I love that point. Remember in the 60s when JFK jumped out of his car, got onto a grassy hill,

shot his gun, then ran back onto the car and popped it in the head? The world's fastest man. That'd be great. If you were The Flash, what a way to go out. You shoot a gun and then run into the bullet. Goodbye cruel world. Yeah, yeah.

Well, that could be on Superman's suicide note. Faster than a speeding bullet and I'm going to prove it right now. Yeah. Cool. What would it be like if other superheroes killed themselves? What was that? Did someone give us the stop doing suicide jokes light?

Is that what happened? I don't know. I thought I heard something. Oh, okay. Right. This joyful noise coming out of a room of people. I've never heard it before. I freaked out.

It's a sign of a bad podcast when there's enough room to go, I can hear one person say one word. What have you got, Tommy? You said you've got something to tell me up top of the show. Oh, yeah. I love you, Carl. I got here last night. You just got here today.

I got here last night. I went out for dinner with some friends, and we went to a restaurant, and we were sitting there, and after about ten minutes, the waiter came along, and he crouches down restaurant and we were sitting there and after about 10 minutes the waiter came along and he crouches down and he goes,

has anyone talked to you guys through the specials? And we go, no. And he goes, so the special tonight is a meatball sub on a bed of pasta and it takes me a few seconds

to log on. I go, fucking hell, a meatball sub on some pasta. Sounds pretty fucking good. And then I remember, hang on a minute, we're at an Asian restaurant. But me, like the friends that I'm with. Asian restaurant, my parents have

got some interesting words to say about them. A few of them in Alice Springs are there. The two friends that I'm with, they don't listen to the pod. So they're very confused by this. Like, what kind of fucking special is this on this menu? And then I go, fuck, he's done it again. I see what's happening here.

Which again, they still don't have the context for who this man is. Right. I feel like half the crowd don't either. But anyway, keep going. I'm just swearing at this waiter now. Right. But then, I'm like... So what you're saying is, the waiter was a listener. Yeah, the waiter was a listener. That was his little code,

the meatball sub. Yes, I'm just explaining that for people. I don't know if you know how to tell a story, but... Okay. Well, okay, you take it over then. Alright. Okay, so then... What did I do next? So then, I went into the toilets and I jacked off into my own mouth and, uh... Am I getting all this right? That's 100% it. What did I do next? So then I went into the toilets and I jacked off into my own mouth. That's 100% it.

I told you I know how to tell a story, man. I mean, like your parents, I would have used more colourful language to describe it. But I did it Flash style. So I busted and then I ran around in front of it. Fuck. Five minutes in. Jesus. But it was funny because it's like, I go, oh, this is just a listener

who's come over and pretended to be a waiter. So we're talking to him and fucking around and then he's like, anyway, seriously, has anyone taken your drinks orders? We're like, wait, so you do actually work here? He's like, yeah. What a fucking rollercoaster. And then he brought us around to shots.

Very nice. Really? Yeah. Nice. That is a good story. Yeah. You do know how to tell a good story. Thanks, man.

It's good. Yeah, thanks. And then I came in his mouth. Bottoms up. Prove it. Yeah, you know. You put your meatballs in his throat. Okay.

Yeah. Oh, fuck that one. The king over here. No, it's good to be back in camera because we haven't been here for like two years or so or something like that. Fuck, no one was there last time, obviously. They kept track.

Yeah, how many people are here now that didn't come see us last time because they were seeing Lorde? Oh, yeah. Don't put your hand up, you idiot. Shall I say this quick? I want to say this quick. Because we've only been here a couple of times, and we haven't been here for a little bit,

but this is a rare time. This never happens. Usually, we'll decide to go to a city, and then we'll have to organise the gig ourselves and all that sort of stuff, and organise our own hotel and flights and venue and everything like that. This time, this is the first time we've... Basically the first time that someone has brought us up. So everything's looked after.

They just say, here's this amount if you want to come up. We'll fly you up, we'll put you in a hotel. Sort everything out. All you have to do is turn up and tell a story about jacking off into a restaurant hotel toilet. So... LAUGHTER Into a restaurant hotel toilet. So. Into a restaurant hotel toilet.

I didn't listen to your story. So. So this is like fancy for us. Yeah, that restaurant was just room service and the waiter was me in the mirror. I love you Tommy, I love you too. Nut.

I got backstage last And they're way more important than you That's a million of you by the way But it's cool to be back here Because we've been brought up by a bunch of people By the comedy festival, people that run the Canberra comedy festival Do you want me to tell the story? Up to you, man. This is not part of the...

This is part of both of us. This is both of our stories. Yeah, go for it. I'm playing a role in the story, you know. All right, all right. So then Tommy was in the toilet. I sure was. So we tried to come up a couple of years ago,

and we tried to look for a venue or whatever, and we got told, someone rang me up and went, oh, yeah, yeah, if you want to help with a venue, I'll help you out. And I said, yeah, no worries. They said, oh, we'll charge you this much. I went, I don't need to be charged anything. I just need a venue. And they said, no, no, no, we'll take this chunk.

And I said, no, I don't need any of that. And they said, well, you won't be able to find it anywhere in town. I don't know if you know me, but I went, I'll fucking find some. It is my mission. I'll come up here and lose as much money as I fucking want. But the way you're describing it, it makes it sound like you just don't understand commerce.

It's like, hey, this is at the restaurant and this is what food costs. No, no, no, I'll tell you what I'll be doing with my fucking money. Thank you very much. I believe you'll just be giving me the steak. Thank you. So then I got my back up and then we found a really bad venue, thus proving me wrong.

But anyway, we got to do it ourselves. We got to keep all the money ourselves. But then I think someone that listens here then asked about it and went, oh, why don't you bring up Dum Dum Cop? And the very same people that said that to us went, no, no, no. They want to come up, but we said no, because they're going to bring down the reputation of Canberra. Yeah.

And then we came in their mouths and we were like, we'll show you. I guess we've proved them wrong right now here, guys. But no, the same people then brought us up here now. So well, well, well, guys. We really, the same people then brought us up here now, so well, well, well, guys. We really played the long game here. Fuck you! I wonder if that's them up in the

balcony. Alright, I'll just get that off my chest, everyone. Do you feel better? A little bit. Do you feel like a big man? Yeah, I feel need to get that off my chest everyone Yeah, do you feel better? A little bit Do you feel like a big man? Yeah, I feel a bit bigger That's good I was wondering if that was ever going to come up on the show

Yeah Who was at that first ever Canberra gig that we did? Amazing that you're not dead of pneumonia Because it was a shed, I believe Am I remembering wrong? Did it have a dirt floor? It did have a dirt floor it did have a dirt floor

fuck and this guy remembers dirt Old Cambrian yes you're right front row talk after the show

if everyone else could leave and give us a moment alone to have a nice pleasant conversation it would be great yeah

alright let's get a guest out let's get a guest out. Oh by the way, here's something I was going to say to you earlier. What order should we bring the guests on in? I think we should bring Andrew Peacock out first. A walkout

off the back of an Andrew Peacock reference. I thought we were in Canberra. That's an old school 80s politician. You all love politics here. That's when you guys moved to Canberra, isn't it? Hands up if you have any idea who that is. Okay. Honestly, more than I expected.

All the people who knew the reference just didn't laugh. Okay. Do you want to have a... Okay, who though, seriously? Who else? Who else from Parliament House should we get out here? The hottest one. Are you thinking what I'm thinking? You in the toilet.

Do we have Pammy booked? No, go on. Whoever you think is the most attractive out of the three guests we have. I want you to introduce them in most to least attractive. I'm going to need a few minutes in the bathroom with each of them

because I measure attractiveness very differently. You were doing last night, trying to get the order of the guests last night in the toilet. Yeah, exactly. Right, okay. I was doing some real... Come on.

Okay. Please welcome back into the little dum-dum club... Dave Thornton's favourite comedian, Dilwook Jaya Singer! Now that's a spicy meatball. Now that's a hot samosa. That is a cheat day. Do we tell the listeners back on what just happened? No.

I think they can get the vibe given what we've been talking about. They kissed, they kissed. Someone must have taken a photo of that. My mum and I would not have approved of what just happened. What, just him being out on stage? Hello, nice to be here. I was at that first ever Canberra Live show. Yeah.

And it just hit me that that was probably, I think, the last weekend that I ever drank. Really? Yeah. Oh, it was, you know what? That is great because you did, you got really drunk. Yeah. And that's when we were driving up and back. Yeah. And we went up and you had an ABC special to film the next day.

First time ever, one hour comedy special for me to film. What a huge opportunity to do that. Instead of resting the night before, I got drunk and at 5am I was at a gay bar with Sam Dastyari. Yeah. And we went there and at like 1 or 2am we go, hey, we want to go home. Let alone you, you've got an ABC special to film tomorrow and you're like, nah, I'll stay out a little bit longer. Yeah, you were the responsible one.

Yeah, yeah. So then you stayed out, we went home and then when you came back, not only did you not sleep, you then stayed up and watched a movie? Huh? No, oh. Oh. Yeah, yeah. I think I watched Incredibles.

Yeah, was it? Noxie said you came into the hotel room and you were waking him up because you kept laughing at the jokes in the Incredibles. A movie for eight-year-olds. No, it's just, it's really funny. It is a good movie, yeah. It's really funny. Shout out to the Incredibles.

Especially the kid who rides up in the bicycle. I don't know, something amazing, I guess. Hilarious. But I do remember that now rides up in the bicycle. I don't know. Something amazing, I guess. Hilarious. But I do remember that now. You're right. Because I couldn't sleep. I was too wide from all the fucking Red Bull or whatever I had at the gay bar. And the sperm.

Yeah, fuck. That was the last time I drank. Well, last week I drank, I think. Right, right, right. So then you went home and then filmed your first ever, you know, thing on TV. Not at home, as in with the iPhone. Yeah, yeah.

I said, this is my live stand-up, guys. No, I went back to Melbourne. Yeah, the next day. And filmed my first ever stand-up. Yeah. And then, you basically couldn't release it

because you were just sweating and then passing out the whole thing. Correct. We have a couple of people in the live crowd here who was at that taping and they can verify this. Every 15 minutes, the makeup artist had to get on stage

and pat me down. And it was really quite incredible when you watch the edit because you see me perform, perform, do a bit, and there's sweat building on my face, and then cut away to the crowd, and back on me, it's dry. But the shirt soaked. The shirt remains soaked. Yeah, it was not a good time. Because I called you after the taping, and I said, dry. But the shirt soaked. The shirt remained soaked.

It was not a good time. Because I called you after the taping and I said, how did it go? And you went, mate, I think I've learnt a very valuable lesson. But I like how you've got about five stories like that that end with you fucked everything up because you were drunk and eating too much and you go, oh wow. And it's like, oh wow. And that's when you decide to stop drinking and you're like, no.

Yeah. There's so many red flags along the way. I just kept eating those red flags. I thought it was one of those ones you put in burgers. That you don't eat, sure. Wait, how do you guys do cheap beer? But yeah, that was it.

Fucking, just, yeah, remember, so I've decided to fuck it after all these years, let's get back on it, right? No, it's water. It looks like beer, though. Man, it would be so fun if you got back on it. No. Who said yes? You were a fun drunk.

There was that night after the grand final one year where you had left a pub with a pint glass. No, you left the MCG with the pint glass and then brought it to my house. Yeah, yeah. On the tram. On the tram. Yeah, I did some dumb stuff. But I think I had enough of them though. I feel like, well, we've got more stories to get through. Like, for starters,

I need to bring this up. I feel like I haven't been on the pod in a while, I feel, but obviously I'm a big fan. I would like to think I'm your number one ticket holder. Right. And I've been listening, but there was one particular but obviously I'm a big fan. I would like to think I'm your number one ticket holder. Right. And I've been listening. But there was one particular episode that I wanted to bring up because I felt like there's some, what's the word, egregious things being said about me on an episode with Becky Lucas and Adam Knox when you guys were drunk. Oh, yeah. When you called in.

When I called in. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The question was thrown up. It was like, do you reckon Dil went to one of those Thai massages to... And all four of you went absolutely.

And you just wanted to give it a fifth yes? I want to give it the five stars. No, here's the official answer. In Thailand, no. No. No, here's the official answer.

In Thailand, no. Why would you want to come on here and bring that up? Content. So you think it's dodgy to do it? Guys, let me defend myself, okay? I didn't bash that old woman. I pushed her down the stairs. They're two very separate things. I can't believe you thought I was getting jerked off in Costa Moya.

It was in Bourke Street, Melbourne. Little Bourke Street. Well, that's what she said. Yeah. I love you, Carl. Yeah, so that's the official statement that I'm going to release. Just anyone who was wondering. In Bangkok, in Thailand, no. Because here's the official statement that I'm going to release. Just anyone who was wondering. In Bangkok, in Thailand, no.

Because here's the thing. Imagine if one of the listeners was there going, just if I walked out or something like that. Like the number, because the whole island was taken over by like 200 of Dum Dum fans. The last thing you want to hear is, see you mate. But is everything dick?

Sperm everywhere It sounds like you're starting to regret not doing it You're having a fucking great time Well, you know, there's a third one apparently So maybe I might do that there Is that the only reason you're coming back? To finally make Google... Poor choice of words, coming

And back Is it official? Have I said it? Yeah, I think I officially said that I am coming back for the third. Yeah. So, yeah, maybe. I don't know. But, yeah, I wouldn't want to risk it with one of the fucking fans there. But what, you're willing to risk it in Bourke Street, Melbourne?

No fans of comedy around the Melbourne CBD? Yeah. Well, back then I wasn't doing comedy. Well, that's what the audience thought too. Very good. Yeah. All right, let's find out who Tommy thinks is the second hottest out of the guests we have booked today.

Ooh. Are they both flashing their genitals at me or are they not? Does that make them hotter or not hotter? So the second hottest? Yes. Okay, please welcome Dave Thornton! Yeah! Now there's sperm everywhere I tell you what, I get it now

To be honest, we talked before I came on stage and I said, Carl, can I make out with you? He goes, as long as you dress like me That was almost masturbating I think you said the same thing to your partner That was almost masturbating. I think you said the same thing to your partner, didn't you? When you conceived the little one. You have to dress like Tando or this isn't happening.

This is like, yeah, a before and after shot of a plastic surgeon. Hey, Thornow's alright See ya, dickhead Do a duck sandwich But actually funny this time For the people listening, I was clapping like a seal Carl Tanner Cameron, very good to be here Very good to be here.

Literally, though, the only thing is, you and I, we both flew in, didn't we, Charter? We're on the same flight. And I just feel when you turn up here, look,

your airport sets a very high expectation. You get in, you think, fuck me, this is like... It's pretty good, isn't it? It's awesome. It's very good.

It looks like an Apple store. It's great. Yeah, exactly. Why is everyone nice to me and not condescending? What's going on? And then you walk out the canberra. It's got its charm. What you have is good restaurants. I've got to be honest with you.

Every time I come here, I'm surprised. Tommy got me onto the one from yesterday. And you know it's very fussy. Well, show me to your best food trough, sir. Oh man, this tastes great. That's not food, Dill. This is in the top 80 meals I've had today. Hey, I got told a nature strip is public property

so I can do what I want. You told me you were hungry. How many friends were you last night? I was with two people. So there's three of you. And I said, he sent me to the restaurant. He went to a Lazy Sue's. And I went back there just then before this.

And I said, what did you order? And you sent me the whole list. He said, but there was, you know, three of us. I said, yeah, but it's one of me. I pretty much ordered everything. You got all of that? All of that. Jesus fucking Christ. I couldn't sleep after my third of that. Yeah, that was's one of me. I pretty much ordered everything. You got all of that? All of that. Jesus fucking Christ.

I couldn't sleep after my third of that. Yeah, that was just entree. What's the next place? That's why I want to chat to people afterwards and tell me where I can get double pasta from. Because I want to be thorn-oiled to double pasta. Do you have anywhere here that does double pasta, folks? Or is that just a fancy Melbourne thing?

Here's a cheat mode. You can just get one pasta twice. Have you idiots worked that out yet? All this talk of pasta at Tassolo's heart again. Tearing up. This is exactly right. It was late night at Adelaide Fringe Festival about a week ago, ten days ago or so. And he said,

I've got this great recommendation of a Italian restaurant in Adelaide. And I'm like, sure. Okay, let's do this. And we go there and I do my standard. I order two pastas. And the rule is this. I get whatever the pappardelle that they have and then ask them what their most popular one is. So then whatever that, those are the two.

Stop laughing, mate. This is eating disorder that you're laughing at. I love that there's rules for this display of gluttony. This guy in the front row's got a t-shirt and a suit jacket on. He's cosplaying as Danny McGinley. Hey, you said he's eating your soul in your last life.

Did you order two so that he could eat both of them? I ordered two and there was the waiter. You do the waiter better. He had a French accent, which is kind of incongruous. You do the waiter better. Oh, the waiter, he had a French accent, which is kind of incongruous. You're in an Italian restaurant, you fucking idiot. Yeah, it's like,

have you ever been to an Indian restaurant with Chinese waiters? Not into it, shut it down. Oh, mate, ask Chandler's parents about it. They don't like it. Man, they don't like the Chinese. So you've ordered double racism? Whatever your favourite is. Whatever your most popular racism.

And the puppeteering. So we had a nice night out. Just the two of us, finally, away from the kids. And then we were sitting there and he's like, I'd like this and this. And the guy's like, oh wait, I need my order. And then you could see the look on his face. He's like, did you order the two pastas?

And Dill's like, yeah, yeah, both of them for me. He looks at you then, because he stared at me for two seconds. Wait, I will say, he looked at me like I was his carer. No, it looks like he's your servant that you make order for you. A mark! When the gentleman comes over, I'll have the parpadelle. You're like, I want the colonial times to keep going. I want a brown manservant.

I'm bringing the Ra's back, baby. Yeah, so I ordered. He said, but you just ordered two. I said, yeah, they're both for me. And then he stares at me for three seconds and then just goes straight to Donald. He ignores me and goes, are you serious?

No, he goes, is he serious? Like, as if I couldn't understand what he was saying. That's a great French accent. That's a really good French accent. It's almost boring. Was that Samuel L. Jackson? What was that? And the funny thing was that he went and got the order,

so he puts it all in, and then Dill has this thing where he comes back and he goes, where's your accent from? And the guy's like, oh, it's French. I grew up in France. And then he's like, oh, so you've only been here for a little bit. He's like, no, no, I've lived here for 20 years. I have never seen that.

Dil thought it was lost in translation. No, no, no, you're weird. Alright, well, I guess it's down to you to introduce, in your opinion, the ugliest guest we have. Oh, interesting. Weirdly, they've still got their dick out. Folks, please welcome back into the little Dundon Club, Guy Montgomery! I didn't mean it, Guy.

Hello, it's me. Fuck ugly New Zealand comedian Guy Montgomery. An absolute two. Here he is, folks. What a joy it is to share a stage with Australia's best and brightest. He's got us there, boys. You are genuinely quite a handsome man. Because I never really noticed because you had that weird moustache thing for years.

And now you've taken it off. I'm like, yeah, you're fucking gorgeous. I was actually also sensationally attractive with the moustache. No, I disagree. Don't you think everything that comes out of Guy's mouth is like a 1980s cricket commentator? Yes. Like a 1980s cricket commentator? Yes. It just reminds me of my flight at the Concords DVD.

That's all. No, it is, honestly. I was so excited. Just hearing all the different topics that I would get to come out and contribute to, I thought, oh, this is a real slice of me. Yeah. Let's have a recap. What have we had so far?

Oh, look, I love food. I love to masturbate. I mean, you know, we're thick as thieves, us five. There's a lot in this episode so far. We might have to split it into two parts. Yeah, yeah. It's more ground than we usually cover. What's more relatable than food and masturbation? Masturbating food.

Like cucumbers and... I mean, yeah, if you put those two things together, you start splitting the rope. I would describe a cucumber as a masturbatory food. If you're jerking off a cucumber, that is to no end, Tilro. I'm not selfish. Yeah, but it's an inanimate object. Unless it's a sea cucumber, in which instance...

They do actually cum. Or as Tommy says when he orgasms, nut. Nut. It's the thing that I say. I scream it out loud. I put the cum in sea cucumber. Okay, for going down produce though, yes.

Cucumber definitely. Banana? Sure. You can masturbate with it? No, it looks phallic enough that though, yes. Cucumber, definitely. Banana, sure. Well, you can masturbate with a banana. Well, no, it looks phallic enough that maybe... It's too soft to masturbate with. Well, banana? Because with the peel on, I'm not a... I'm not a man. No, no, you're still going to wind up with a potassium mess.

Yeah, that's right. It's true. I mean, is there anything... Does it get weird once the girth kicks in? Like, have you got a capsicum? Is that enough? It's more like a science experiment than jerking off. Hey guys, let's head down to Coles and work this one out.

This is my favourite episode of Ready City Cook. A big carrot. Carrot's a good one, yeah. You could put that in an orifice. Yeah. I mean, you could put that in an orifice. I mean, you could put anything in an orifice. Yeah, with initiative. Yeah, for sure. Do you have a preference other than mouth?

Where to put a carrot? Which orifice would you... I traditionally put carrots in my mouth. Yeah, but that's what's in other than the mouth. Other than the mouth. Okay, okay. The next logical landing spot is my arsehole.

Well, that's interesting. That's not where I would have gone. Okay. Oh, here we go. Yeah, but to be fair, you wouldn't have gone with a carrot in the mouth either, though, so...

Wait, you can put them in mouths? Do you think the cucumber or the carrot is better? As a masturbatory aid? Yes For sticking into an orifice It's always a cucumber to me It's got a bit of girth

It's got a bit of length And also it comes with a condom already on it They've got very pointed serrated edges on the rep as most cucumbers that are rind wrapped. That is a perilous game you're playing. That's how I like it. That's true. Are you going to roll the dice on that? I like a little bit of danger. This is you after

you've sobered up. What were you and Dastyari getting up to when you were hanging out at the only gay club that politicians go to which I believe is called the polling booth. This is him healthy, putting vegetables up his arse now. He was putting Big Macs up his arse before.

Now that's only on Saturdays. Putting two cucumbers up your arse at the same time. He just wakes up with a family box of KFC. What did I do? Well, I think these guys have got sick of this. I don't care.

Don't you think the carrot... Because the carrot, it's got a smaller tip so you can kind of ease yourself into it. Something you're used to, Tommy? Are you a... I mean, are you a person that likes... Vegetables up my arse? Not vegetables, but like a finger or anything?

Have I had that happen in the past and enjoyed it? Yes. Am I under oath? I was honest at the start of the pod, you should be too. And to answer your question,

if you're wondering how, absolutely. I presumed that, that's why I didn't ask. Where's the makeup artist from Dill's ABC special? I'm fucking sweating up here. My favourite question on live shows

in the interstate. Who's, anyone here who's never been to a dum-dum show? Yeah, right up the front. The dude who's dressed up. No, no, but

do you mean who's never listened to this show? Yeah, listened to. mean who's never listened to this show? Yeah, listened to. Never listened? Never listened to it. So you brought her along, madam? Wow.

How's it, what's your name, friend? G'day, Glenn. G'day, Glenn. How are you finding the show so far? Oh, God, don't. It's good? Okay, we're good, guys. All right, so what about...

Is that the canary down the mineshaft just there? Is that what's happening here? It's canary down the mine shaft just there? Is that what's happening here? It's a carrot down the mine shaft. Hey, Glenn, just to let you know, yes, I do enjoy having a few drinks. But let's just keep that as our little secret. Carl, you're all... Glenn, you might want to take that wedding ring off first

before you... Leave it on, thanks. You're like a bit of roughage. I love a bit of a speed bump. Oh my God, that feels like 18 carats. That's when you put carats up there. Well, who's the cutest now, Dazzlehead? Oh fuck, I love politics

So good You don't get this in Quandah Just Tony Jones looking at an audience member Oh, I like it Guy, thanks for your candour with that topic. No worries. I actually felt like you probably displayed the most candour. I don't want to alarm you,

but I was speaking in jest almost the entire time. Oh, my God, no. All right, boys, we've got to restart the survey. What a wily New Zealand fox you have turned out to be. I am coming. I would have described you as half to be. I am coming. I would have described you as half of that. I would change the second N to a T.

What else have you done, fuck? Well, this is very embarrassing, Bill. You've accidentally spelled out the word cunt. Oh, no! One of the worst derogatory words there are. What are the chances, Glenn? I gave this guy a sweaty special. What are the odds?

Bill, so... Yes, Ryan. You've done quite well for yourself. We've talked about this. You've lost a lot of weight. Correct. What are we sitting on at the moment? What's the weight loss at the moment? 88 kilos.

Sorry, what? Wait, no, that's your current weight. Glenn, he didn't lose 88 kilos. Glenn, he didn't lose 88 kilos. No, I didn't lose 88 kilos. I lost about 35, 36 kilos. Right, 36 kilos. No, don't clap. I don't like the clap.

A way less enthusiastic clap than when they thought you'd lost 88 kilos. Like, fuck it. Only 30-something. Fuck it. Loser. Yeah. That's what we're on, 88. So you lost 30, what was it?

35, 36. Great, great work. Why do you say fuck first? No, because I'm amazed. Oh, thank you. Okay, cool, thank you. But having said that... Yes?

I guess there is a little bit of... You cheeky boy? There is a bit of subconscious fuck, because as you know, one of my favourite things about having you on the show Ever since your first episode Was the chance to do so many fat jokes Sure, of course

It served me well I enjoyed them There was a lot of love that I would always say In those little banters If you want to take it like that, sure In the orifice I think that endeared you to everyone

to the listeners and whatever because you could take your joke and all that sort of stuff but definitely we could use that sort of content every time you were on

now it's sort of a bit annoying we don't really have as much you've gotten successful you've lost all that weight yeah at this moment I really feel like

putting on 25 kilos just to stop him from going wherever he's about to go no no no no no no just to stop him from going wherever he's about to go. No, no, no. No, no, no. Just to distract him. Look at me, I still have some titties.

No, but because we can't do that anymore, I thought tonight we could like officially say goodbye to the fat jokes. Oh, like an immemorial. Yeah. Like a funeral. Have like a wake for your fat jokes. Oh, a cake, did you say?

You're about to relapse. Oh, wow. So we've got a bunch of jokes, a bunch of fat jokes about you, that we are going to put in the bin tonight. Oh, wow. What a prop, everyone. That's the same bin that we fished all the material so far out of before the show. This is literally the bin out the back which I had to peel a band-aid out of.

Just leave it in the bin? Yeah, yeah. No, no, this bin's going to be famous now. Only the best. In case fans want to buy it as a merch afterwards. I love the idea, but now the... Imagine if I put it all back on at some point. In case fans want to bite us much afterwards I like I love the idea but now Imagine if I put it all back on at some point

We're going to have to find this bin again So save the bin To be honest it's just a container that we can use for Adam Knox jokes from now on Where'd you put the bandaid? It's on the floor at the moment Is anyone going to eat it? It's cheap So is that cool?

We've all got some jokes. Alright, I'm prepped for it. I'm ready. Okay, fine. Because this is the final time we get to do it. Yeah. This is alright. To be honest, Dil,

Carl didn't tell me this was happening. I just had them on my pillow. I've just been holding onto them for a year. It's been tough. I feel like doing fat jokes about you when you're not fat is the most woke we're going to ever get on this podcast. Yeah, true.

You did 20 minutes beforehand jokes about you when you're not fat is the most woke we're going to ever get on this podcast. Yeah, true. You did 20 minutes beforehand ask him to get back to drinking. Yeah, yeah. This is the nicest thing he'll do. Let's start. Alright, here we go. Dill's so fat, he calls Fat Albert Albert.

Hey, hey, hey. Gone too soon. Gone too soon Go on too soon Okay Might I just jump in on this one? Yeah yeah yeah I know Sri Lanka is known as a developing country I just didn't realise that what they were developing

Was diabetes I miss you so much RIP RIP to a sweet prince Were you going to say something? Tommy No, you go Actually, I've taken a slightly different tack

Because now you are stepping on my turf As a life comedian As a what? A life comedian I thought you said life As in L-A-F-E Just say skinny, you fucking idiot. No, if you don't understand the word life,

that would make you the fucking idiot. No, I'm with Carl. Is it light? What are you saying? L-I-T-H-E. Life. I'll say... Oh, life.

I don't know what that word means. Sorry, I'm from Sri Lanka. Get used to it. You are now it. You are life. Very cool. What I've done is I've decided to step onto your turf, and I've written some jokes from the perspective of a Sri Lankan comedian. Please, can I give you some wood polish first?

No, it's okay. See, I guess this is to be read you know it's not even at you really but this one goes living as a Sri Lankan immigrant in Australia can be hard because of systemic racism and that's all I've actually written here

oh goodbye it's like an overall mantra for the ad. That's a real shame we had to retire that one. That's straight out of my garter spot. And now it finally explains to the listeners they wouldn't have known this. When you walked out today, you had blackface on.

Now it's all starting to make sense. Dil's so fat he thought gout was a type of entree. Double gout? Double gout was a type of entree. Double gout? Double gout. Dil's fat and not popular with the ladies. He's less total eclipse of the heart and more total eclipse of the sun. We'll miss him.

Jeez, Chandler, that's a big stack you've got there. Hey, I only had five minutes before the gig, so I can only... Fitting and shit, that's a lot. Do you just want to go two by two? Okay, all right, all right. He ripped out half of his ambition board. His dream board, yeah. I've got nothing from a comedy festival show, but I've got plenty of this.

Here we go at 120 kilos Dil would cost $172 if he was a sack of potatoes but I don't know how much he'd cost as olive oil but I do know he'd be extra virgin nice very nice for the thinking comedian

for the life comedian you're almost using that correctly For the thinking comedian. For the life comedian. You're almost using that correctly. Such a great comedy word, isn't it? I've got to look at it live. Just rolls off the lips. Absolutely not. I thought I was out here with Australia's best and brightest. Not the

bloody dickhead brigade. I got the definition of life. I think we're making him dumber by being out here. Oh, like we haven't done that to every other guest. The definition of life is thin, supple and graceful. Correct. So this one says, I'm from Sri Lanka and I used to be an accountant.

Yes, a Sri Lankan accountant. So not just a money cruncher, but a curry munching money cruncher. Please don't throw that away. That's in my corporate zip. It's gone. It's gone. You know the rules. You've done well when I told you to deliberately write a bad joke there.

Well done, guy. Dill's so fat that the Malaysian Airlines 370 flight threw itself into the ocean because Dill was meant to be on it a month later. Fat and topical. I'll do a few in a row since I've got so many. You're as greedy as I was when I was fat. Joke sheet day. Now you're losing kilograms just in this process.

Now that Dil's lost weight, I feel sorry for the owner of the cheesecake shop chain. He still has one kid to put through school. Dil's the only thing browner and full of chocolate than Cadbury's. Dil's the only person who'd have to put new holes in an asteroid belt. That was fucking clever, yeah. That one's great. That's a banger. It's fucking great. I just had a quick survey of the crowd.

There's four people who are hating this. They've put the lights on at the back. I'm not sure why they've done that, but it definitely highlights the people who aren hating this. They put the lights on at the back. I'm not sure why they've done that, but it definitely highlights the people who aren't enjoying it. They're the people you shat on at the start of the show, the organisers. Here we go. Dill was an accountant

factual. He said that. Nice. So, even though if you put 58008 into a calculator and turn it upside down, he'd see boobs although if you want to see boobs on his face, he'd just do a handstand laughter laughter

fuck, that run up I lost a few calories laughter to be honest, I got bored of my own joke laughter now you know how I felt when Guy read my joke out laughter if you didn't like the last joke I read you'll love this one Is there a word in it that we don't understand?

I find it immensely challenging to write jokes so I actually just watched your gala set What I've done is I have actually slightly tweaked the wording in this one Did you hear that? Your views have doubled. How good is that? I love how you've come from being heavier to being lighter,

and you're telling your story as a comedian. You're telling your weight loss story. I love how you've taken your disability and made it an ability. That was one of Dil's jokes. But he was talking about an old racist Australian man talking about him as an immigrant. So there's a lot of mental leg work for you guys.

Good indication of how good the delivery is for you. That's funny. You trimmed your fat off and he's trimming your confidence off. The only reason that Dil hasn't had a heart attack yet is because that would be too much exercise. Ladies get boats named after them. Dill's had a plane named after him.

A virgin jumbo. He's still so fat. He always looks like he's expecting an Uber Eats delivery. It's all in the polls. I'll do one more. I've always thought that Dil was a skinny man trapped in a fat man's body, who was eaten by an even fatter man. I'll do this one, this is my last one.

Dil has always said that in comedy he's inspired by Russell Peters and Will Anderson. Personally, I wish he'd take a little bit more inspiration from the likes of John Belushi and Chris Farley. That's barely a fat joke. That's just... Just oldie and die-cut. Dil loves bakeries. He loves Danish rolls, sausage rolls,

but looking at him, his favourite is high cholesterol. And I'll leave you with this one. Most fat guys struggle... I think you're going off on this, aren't you? Mainly because I'm here at seven, so we should get out of here. Most fat guys struggle to see their own penises. Now that he's lost weight,

he's realised it can be a skinny man's problem as well. Can, uh, question Dave Daunton. Can I use that for tonight's show that I have? That is a belter. I wouldn't mind holding onto that. Are you out of jokes, Guy? I, uh, well... Sorry, I thought you were talking to Dave as if that's his new nickname. I don't know. You're out of jokes, guy? I, uh, well... Sorry, I thought you were talking to Dave as if that's his new nickname.

You're out of jokes, guy. You're a New Zealand guy. Right. Well, if you give him five minutes, he can look you up on YouTube. I am out of jokes, but I would like to say I met you when you used to drink and you used to be bigger

and I'm really happy for you that you've worked really hard and you've become very successful and I'm genuinely very happy for you. So eat that you piece of shit. Because I've got a few left. Do you want to have a crack at one? Yeah, yeah. I'm actually really good with jokes.

You want to have a crack at one? Yeah, yeah. I'm actually really good with jokes. I feel like this one will suit you the best, maybe. Maybe you can have this one. That's your way. This is a funeral, by the way. We should be mourning. Why are we laughing?

Oh, there's a few people in the room doing that. They're mourning the money they spent. I don't have a proper phrasing. I just want to say this. I can't believe he ate all the butter! Woo! Oh, you don't

get another one of these. I feel like the delivery was 100% to blame. In the right hands they could have lit this room on fire. If I'd have said that, I would have been out the door from crowd surfing by now. But anyway, you had to fuck it up. All right, let's just get to the end of this. Dil orders so much, his Uber Eats driver constantly looks like he's doing a mono.

Oh, right, right, right. Dil orders so much his Uber Eats driver constantly looks like he's doing a mono. That's the smart man's fat joke. You've got to know a lot about science to get that one. One ice cream chain has lost so much money from Dil being skinny, it's now just Ben's. That's a skinny joke. Yeah. It's barely a joke This is for me and Tommy I feel like all the fat shaming we've done has worked with Dil If only all the career shaming we cop would work

As true now as it was back then But Look, just to end with I brought this up with a few people. Some people don't like jokes being read out at a comedy show. Shut up. But, like at a wedding, you know,

if you can't make the gig, the gig, wedding. The gig where you roast Dave O'Neill for 20 minutes and not mention your wife? That sort of gig? I mentioned it. So, some people didn't make it, but they wanted to telegram in some jokes. Oh, this is like a, like... Some friends of the show.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Here we go. Alright, here's a couple of... Like some satellite connection. Right, yeah, yeah. No. I think people get it. Yeah, yeah. We didn't need any help from you, fuck it. So, this is from Nick Capper, so I'll say it as Nick Capper. Right. Deal looks different. Hang on, hang on, hang on. Here's a piece of shit

to rub on yourself first. Dill looks different after he lost weight in that he now looks like a completely different fat person. That's the best laugh Capper's ever gotten. This is from Adam Knox. Now that Dill has lost weight, his face is all over TV

rather than just his midsection on current affair obesity reports. This is from Brett Blake. He can replace me easily. This is from Brett Blake. I cannot read that one. OK. Hey, before you read Brettie's one, can I just tell a quick story?

Because it's... Last night, he's putting... There's a gig in Melbourne called Cooper's Comedy that he runs. And he put out an advert on like Beat or whatever that is. And he was meant to say, because I was the special guest that could not be announced.

He was meant to say, featuring special guest as seen on Hamish and Andy's True Story. Meaning you, right? Meaning me. Because he's dyslexic, he wrote, featuring special guest, Hamish and Andy from True Stories. So the place was just chockers.

I was there, and people were coming in, and he's like, what's going on? Like, he honestly was, like, confused there was people at his gig. Oh, man, it was incredible. It's just packed to the rake. And so I leave, and I'm like, goodbye, man. You've got people at your gig? Great. And he's like, oh, yeah and I'm like, goodbye man you've got people, you're great and he's like, oh yeah, I'm a bit frazzled now

I get halfway home, I get a call and go oh man, I've got to tell you this I was confused enough and then people kept coming up and going when's Hamish on? and he's like, I don't fucking know who Hamish is, leave me alone so from the great mind of Brett Blake

I don't want a fat shame deal, I mean he has eyes in a mirror So from the great mind of Brett Blake, I don't want to fat shame Dil. I mean, he has eyes in a mirror. I'm sick of doing all the heavy lifting. Now I know what it's like to be Dil's knees. Did he spell it with a K? I doubt it. Had to put in Babelfish.

That was a very live joke. It was neat and tight. We're getting there. Supple. We're getting there. Josh. Now, Josh Earle, everyone. Everyone thinks Josh Earle is the nice... Do you need to get a guitar first?

No. Everyone thinks Josh Earle is the nice guy of comedy. He is not a nice man. He is... But he knows how to lay the boots in. He does. Precision. Yeah, he does. He's very good at it. So here we But he knows how to lay the boots in. He does. Precision. Yeah, he does.

He's very good at it. So here we go. Dill lost a lot of weight publicly, making him the Sri Lankan subway guy, but mainly for the other things they have in common. Oh, fuck. Two to go. Here we go.

Josh wrote as many jokes as me. So I had to trim him down. Now that Dylan's lost all that weight, what's he going to do with all these old clothes? I'm sure there's some fat homeless man who wants to look even worse. Man, it was full bags full of garbage bags full of clothes that I finally had to get rid of

Right And there's like 12 suit jackets that I'm trying to get measured down but they're like nah it's too much to lose So you just took all those garbage bags back to Tarot Cash to get a refund?

It's true Alright last one For all the people that don't like comedy we're about to finish don't worry guys D we're about to finish. Don't worry, guys. Dillard's lost all his weight. His career is going up and up

and he is still single. So the bad news is it must be his personality. Suddenly have the urge to have some comfort food. That's the plan. To get you to just get so depressed to go and binge on food

and then we take them all out of the bin and use them next time. We started off by let's get him drunk again and just reverse everything that I've tried to work on. Should we have a minute's silence? I feel like there were five people in the crowd that were doing it already. Yeah, we've purged this. We've gotten rid of it.

Let's take a moment. Let's all stand. Let's be upstanding. We've made a lot of shit about Adele. Let's be a little bit respectful. Let's be upstanding for the Sri Lankan National Anthem. Guys, we're going to hear the Sri Lankan National Anthem, so here we go. Fuck you.

Thank you. Thank you, guys. Thank you, guys. You can be seated. You will be missed. You will be missed. Gone but never forgotten. Fuck, that's a real banger of a national anthem you got there. Fuck, like Pavlov's dog, I just had a salad.

Get your fucking soft serve now that I've heard that. Yeah, yeah. Look, speaking of Dil, don't we have one more? Will we? Will we? In the last 40 minutes or so? Oh, yeah. Rings a bell.

Rings a bell. Didn't we have one more thing? Yeah, we had one more life thing that we could possibly do. I really regret using the word at all. How'd I go, Guy? Did I use it right? Oh, I mean, it was in a sentence.

Yeah, that's where those things go, isn't it? Yeah, great. Like a carrot up a dot. Yeah, you put an adjective before a noun, I guess. No, you can't even do that. I am genuinely losing brain cells by trying to figure it out. Thanks, man. It means a lot.

I've got my next year's comedy festival show, Delightful, ready to go. Oh. Yeah, with the way it went down when I used the word earlier, I can't imagine you're going to draw much of a crowd. But, yeah, we were talking today about how you now, you know, your career's taken off. Don't jinx it. I've seen what has happened in Liverpool.

And we're still on track, sort of. Sort of. Having a lot of success with the ladies? Fair to say? Not fair to say. No comment. Okay. No comment.

Really? No comment. Oh, that's what a pants man would say, wouldn't he? Let's talk about it. Well, I'll put it this way. That was the reason why I didn't need to do that in Thailand. Oh, God. I think no comment was way better than that.

Saying I fuck heaps would have been better than that. How did your restraint make it heaps worse? Let's just put it this way. Something terrible. Were you insinuating you eat a lot of pussy? Oh, after hearing that pause at the power launch, it told me that's like

no. Put it this way. I only eat on cheat day. Oh my God. It's like every time you just put it this way, it's like a code for here comes the worst

thing in the country. You keep doubling down on your fuckness. Which is what he said to his parents when he was having that conversation about Alice Prince.

Put it this way, I'm the public face of Subway. Now, you're quite good friends with Dil. Don't drag me into this, guys. I feel like whenever I hit up Dil and I can't get hold of him, or I say, do you want to do this, or you got something on, and it's like, he'll go, I'm busy. And you go, what's going on? I'm busy.

I think that's the code for go, what's going on? I'm busy. I think that's the code for I know what's going on there. You are having a lot of luck, I guess you say, on Tinder and sites like that, right?

Keep going. I'm scared to say anything now. Every time I've said something I've dug myself a bigger hole. Oh, I dug a hole. Did you hear that? Probably fucked in it as well.

Is that where you keep them all? In the hole? Yeah, in that life hole. Your mate. Your mate. Have any of these been right? Any of them? At one point, Dil did read out the dictionary definition.

So we got one. Nice. he's been right. Any of them. At one point, Dil did read out the dictionary definition of right. So we got one. Nice. So you are doing very well with the ladies. I feel like... All men. It's 2019. 2019. He's done it again. Let's just say

it's not just fingers that I like up there. That's your best one. The cleanest. I'm going to start every sentence with let's just say. These guys are working so hard to pay you a compliment. But I've worked with them. I know where this is headed.

I'm scared. Remember that scene in Fight Club where he punches himself in the face? Spoilers. This is what it's like watching. Okay. But yeah, we feel like we don't, we used to make fun of you a lot about

a lot of things on this pod. We used to, unlike tonight. We felt for a little while like we didn't really have anything that we could... Well, I feel like now we're out of ideas. Especially now that we've binned all those jokes. We've got nothing on you now. You try a bit with the candle stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But, you know, we're stretchy. Other people like those candle jokes. I mean, fuck, I don't know. I need a makeup artist. But we feel like now we're fresh out. We can't hurt your career. You're fresh. We got nothing left.

But then we found something. We found something on YouTube. Huh? It's not a public clip, but it's also not a YouTube that's, um, it's not a public clip, but it's also not a clip that's been deleted. So you can't, for some reason you can't search for it or anything,

but we found it. Is it me rapping Eminem? No. That'd be nice. You wish. Why do you keep burying yourself? It's not even you eating, Eminem. Is it me doing a parody song? Oh, my.

Oh, yeah, that one. That is a very life pick. Yeah, yeah. I think I know which one this is. Sorry? Can we just hear? We've got it queued up and ready to go. Do you want context or just go for it first?

Go for it first. Let's go for it first. You've got to hear Dil's scene. There's a video clip that goes with it as well. You shouldn't be this excited about it. This is horrendous. Yeah, but it's just good times. I remember when I did it. Riding up the courage to tell her how you really feel But she dates another guy and calls to tell you that she closed the deal

Highway to the friend zone Gonna take my blue balls to London Take my blue balls to London That's a good game! Save up all your cash And you buy her an expensive bag And then she hugs you when she says You're the brother that you never had You have such an easy laugh You're even laughing at this.

No, I'm laughing at how shit and how good I thought he was at the time. Right. Highway to the friend zone. Fat Al Yankovic. With her in bed thinking this isn't going great. And as she takes his brother and looks him straight in the eye, you can't ask if you are gay. That's not how it goes. There are people in this room right now with a look on their face that says, wow, and I thought the reading out of Fat Jokes was the worst thing I was going to see today.

I think there's a big punchline at the end. Wait. Oh, egos crushed in the friend zone. You just become the mayor of the friend zone.

Highway to the friendzone. I remember this. It's another lonely night serving you wrong. Was that the beginning? That was the big finish. Youporn.

I changed Friendzone to Youporn. Oh, man. You have to be petty. And you thought that curry munchie joke was bad? No, I thought that was a great joke. I killed with it. Do you want to have a crack at that song, dude? I just thought at the end,

you didn't really keep writing parody lyrics. You just started narrating where I imagine your life was at the time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So give us context. Circa, what did we do? 2010, I think I'd just done one open mic, and I'd started... Oh, so 2010, so topical reference with the song.

No, and I was doing radio, Cinefem, the community radio thing. Oh, fine. All right, man. And so not only did I spend hours writing it and then recording this, I released it out to the public. This went to air. I mean, I didn't have too many listeners.

But then I was so proud of it that I grabbed the audio and created a whole video clip on top of that with images and shit like that. And it was on my radio, on my radio show called Dil Conceived Notions. Ah, they were cute times. We were really wondering whether you were going to take this badly

or really well. It's not great, like, but... You still laughed at all of it. Well, I think what I'm laughing at is it's like when you see, when you're a kid, if you find a drawing of yours when you drew when you were one, when you were in're one, or you're two or whatever, you're like, oh, this is terrible, but it's cute. I think I'm laughing at that. But also, because this, I remember how genuinely brilliant I thought it was.

A drawing, you're finding a drawing of, that you did as a two-year-old and it's you going, gay. Fuck, the master, he really knew what he was doing back then. Fuck, I think I might, I was like, I think I should send this to Hamish and Andy. I think I feel like they could use this. I think he should send it to Hamish and Andy. Oh, man. Let's us send it to Hamish and Andy

under someone else's name and see what happens. Oh, yeah. Please don't do that. No, I suppose someone's going to do that. This is from Tilrook Jai Singer Jai Singer So how do you think it's aged

Do you reckon you could get up It hasn't aged well For starters I only recently found out not recently but they were like you know

the friendzone thing as well is like not woke and then the reference to she asks if you're gay Yeah

Oh yeah that's obviously not cool anymore I just said I don't like it Oh, stupid But good on me for trying though Our last trip to Canberra with him got him to stop drinking

I think this one is going to get him to start again Or maybe to stop comedy Or to start it. Listen, but it's... It's good inspiration for any new comedians out there. One day you can start over that. And now look where I'm at.

Next to Tommy Desiloe. Alright guys, we've got to wrap it up That's it for another week Big round of applause Guy Montgomery Dave Thornton Dilrub Jai See ya

Thanks very much for listening And we'll see you next time See ya See ya And they've done it again. They have done it again. And another thing we need to get better at on the show is, hey, those guys, the guests that we've got, have all got shows on. If you are going to live comedy this year, Melbourne, Sydney a bit later on, Perth a bit later on.

Those guys, Dirk Dreisinger, Dave Thornton, Guy Montgomery are all doing their lovely solo stand-up show. So, yeah. Hey, if you like them on the episode

and even if you didn't and you want to reward them for doing the right thing by coming and doing our show, that's what they're doing for a bit of an advertisement. If you don't like them off the cuff,

maybe you'll like them more when they're scripted. Yeah. So, get along to them. Yeah. Lovely work from friends of the show. Yep. Yep.

This was a fun time we had up there in the nation's capital. Thanks to everyone who came out. It was good to be back in Canberra. And yeah, it was nice to be – did we sell out? We were basically sold out. It was pretty full. Yeah. I think we came a couple of tickets off.

It was very big numbers actually. Yeah. It was a lot bigger than any show that we've ever done in Canberra before. Yeah. I think we came a couple of tickets off. It was very big numbers, actually. Yeah. It was a lot bigger than any show that we've ever done in Canberra before. Yeah. There's a lot to be said for not going up against Lorde. Yeah. So, yeah, nice to be rewarded for our return to Canberra. And my solo show sold out that night, too.

So, thanks to everyone who came down to that. But, yeah, good times in the nation's capital. Shame to finally get rid of all those fat jokes. in the nation's capital. Shame to finally get rid of all those fat jokes, but yeah, I guess we'll find something else that's pretty horrible. That we can make fun of about someone? Yeah.

Yeah. Let's go and find a new fat guest who's not even that good at comedy. Right. Because that way they don't get to be successful like Dil. And have the motivation to turn it all around. And go past us with our careers and stuff like that you just have someone who's going to be permanently depressed yes that way yeah that won't lose weight that won't get better than us yeah yeah that's a talent talent talent show for that lack of talent

show australia's got fuck all That'll be good We're auditioning for the new deal We don't want him to get good We don't want him to get skinny God, now we're going to get The inbox will light up With just fucking fat losers hitting us up Going, oh, come on

Perfect That's what I want Really? Yes Do you want to have to wade through all them? So, yeah, we are in the At the moment we're in the middle of really yes do you want to have to wade through all them so yeah we are in the at the moment

we're in the middle of our run at the Melbourne Comedy Festival we got the drunk cast coming up just a reminder everything's all sold out but

you know just it's been a few tickets on the door so yeah hit us up plenty of people hitting us up

going will there be tickets on the door we have some a handful a smattering yes so get on to that then check all the socials for all the details us up, plenty of people hitting us up going, will there be tickets on the door? We have some. A handful. A smattering. Yes. Yeah.

So get on to that. Then check all the socials for all the details about the drunk cast and your qualifications to get in, et cetera. Yep. The solos as well. Thanks to everyone who's come down to them so far. Come and check those out if you're in Melbourne. Yeah. Mine at 8.20 every night at the Cooper's Inn.

Yours at 5.45 immediately after the live pods at the European Food Cafe. A very good point of someone who came to my solo show on the weekend. I said, who is here that, because my solo show is straight on after the live podcast. And I said, who's here that wasn't at the podcast? And someone put their hand up. I was like, why? Why? And he goes, because you can get the podcast for free online and you can't get this for free online. Interesting. That is an excellent point.

Yeah. Good work. It should be the opposite to what it is. The solos should be sold out every night and the pod should have like 10 people there. Weird. Anyway, made a lot of sense. So, thank you. Thanks, whoever you were.

Excellent. So, yeah, we're in the middle of Festival of Fever, so it's all good. I mean, the thing that people, I guess, don't realize is that if you look at the timings, as soon as we finished the last show, as soon as we finished the drunk cast, I'm on a plane to London two days or three days later. I think two days later. It's crazy. It's fucked.

There's no downtime. It's straight over there. I very much regret firing up this Belgrade idea, I have to say. Oh, man. Yeah, I have nothing but regret from the start till now, till the end. Yeah. I hope I enjoy it once I get there. I'm looking for...

Look, we should explain that, give that context as well, is that we are going to Belgrade to do a live, not a live, like a live comedy show I think is the best way to describe it. Yeah, what are we doing? I believe, from what I believe. Are we doing stand-up? From what I believe is we're going to do stand-up, plus we're going to do something that approaches being a podcast at the end of it.

Okay. As in, I believe, and look, you not knowing, yeah, shows how well this has been prepared. Yeah. So I believe it's going to be me and you doing stand-up. It's going to be Nick Capper doing stand-up. Yeah. And then by the end of it, we do a bit of a, you know, us on stage with Milan. Yeah.

Doing a bit of something approaching a live podcast. Okay, right, right. Yeah. Yeah. That's what I believe the show to podcast. Okay, right, right. Yeah. It's what I believe the show to be. So it will be unique. It won't be released. I think maybe we'll put something out to the Patreon subscribers. Yeah, maybe it could be the Patreon.

We should record it just in case. Yeah, yeah. Well, we'll see. Fuck knows. Fuck knows what's going to happen. I'm trying to be positive. Look, I'm always excited to go anywhere for the first time. Yes.

I like seeing new places. Oh, for sure. So I think that part of it will be fun. I'm looking forward to seeing. Look, I'm always excited to go anywhere for the first time. Yes. I like seeing new places. Oh, for sure. So I think that part of it will be fun. I'm looking forward to seeing Belgrade. Just business-wise though, like, you know, for us to sell at those London shows and I was going, wow, this actually makes financial sense to do this. And then all of a sudden we're like paying hundreds and hundreds of dollars to go to Belgrade to a show that is charging about five bucks to get into.

Which no one's going to come to. Yeah. Well, we've just wiped out all the profits just on this fucking belgrade show yeah and um i guess if no one comes we just don't have to do the show it's like night off in belgrade yeah i'm fine with that that has crossed my mind yeah that's definitely crossed my mind and of course then there's milan because we're going with mine that's you know that's where he's from and he's all excited going oh i'm gonna bring you to these places before the show we get fucked up the night before i'm like man what are you talking about we're coming over here to do this show for you yeah this is our job yeah

we'll come out and do a shit job on the night and you'll go you fucked that up like yeah cool you fucked us up that's why we fucked it up i was describing this whole thing to someone who i just met the other day like a week ago just this whole the concept of me doing a podcast and then the fact that we're going to belgrade to do this and i just sound demented like i sound like i live in a fantasy land that i'm just like making up all this stuff that i'm doing so if you're in serbia if you're in belgrade on tuesday april the 30th at 8 30 we're at the ben the Ben Akeba Comedy Club and Bar. I like the look of this Ben Akeba Comedy Club and Bar because I feel like there's some comedy on there,

but a lot of the time there's not comedy on there. It's great because it's like they've posted about us on their Facebook page and everything else they post about is in Serbian and it gets a bit of response. And then there's just our thing there, all in English, no likes, no comments on the post, no engagement whatsoever. Yeah. I think it's literally the crowd we are going to get is literally going to be friends of Milan who just are going there knowing that they're

going to get fucked up with him. Are we just going to get paid in AK-47s? Literally, we're going to walk out the door and go, there you go, 15 shots each as you walk out, and you've just got to chuck the shots in your pocket and go home. Yeah, it should be fun. So if you're in Serbia, if you're in Belgrade... It's sort of the same thing, but...

Well, you can be in Serbia, not in Belgrade. You can be in Greater Serbia and travel to Belgrade yeah hey look even if you're sort of nearby if you're in bosnia and herzegovina yeah if you're in hungary if you're in romania if you're in if you're in bulgaria um stop in if you're if you're in bucharest for the night yep you know come over come over to belgrade if you're're in Albania. Yeah. Come on, guys. We really need the support. Yeah. Get out and support the boys. Any of our Slovenian listeners.

Guys, it's not too far. Come over. Look, I feel like I shouldn't say this, but even if you're in Zagreb, if you're in Croatia, the mortal enemy. Yeah. Come over. Put a hat on. We don't care.

Yeah. Well, we'll care if people start shooting each other in the venue, but you know. Yeah. Come over. Put a hat on. We don't care. Yeah. Well, we'll care if people start shooting each other in the venue. But, you know. Yeah. That'll be good. So that's all interesting stuff. If you're in Montenegro, I'm not ruling you guys out either. Yep. Come in.

Get in. Quick flight. Get in. Then, yeah, London, the third and final podcast that's on sale. There's barely any tickets left to that. So if you've been thinking about coming, snap that up. There's also my solo show

on the, fuck, is it the 5th of May? The Monday. Yeah. No, no, no, no, no, no. I think that's the 6th. The 6th of May at 4pm. That's selling pretty well.

So get onto that. So the Sunday in London, this is how it works, is that what we do, like a, we should do a shout out for this. We do a show in the afternoon, then there's a slight break, then we do another show back to back.

And both those shows are sold out. Yep. Then we have a bit of a break so we can hang out with anyone who wants to hang out, that sort of thing, hang around, have a drink. Then Nick Capper is doing a show. Yep. So, yeah, go on and see capper if you if you if you've got tickets for those two sunday shows already and you want to

hang out with us have a beer and then watch capper afterwards he's going to do like a best of yeah um and you'll be cool five minutes um so hang around go and do that i mean god knows he's not advertising it or even looking at the sales. I said to him, how many of you sold it? He's like, I don't know. I'm not going to look until I get there. That is so dumb. But anyway, so look, we'll be hanging around.

Fucking hell. Maybe I'll – I was going to say I'll go in and heckle Kappa, but he's actually recording it for an album or something. Okay, yeah. So I'll do it definitely now. Good of him to, yeah, be recording it and then also not fussed on whether there's going to be any people in the audience on this recording. Very Nick Kappa.

What a fucking idiot. And he better be recording it with the tux and the hair slick back as well. Yeah, you want that to come through on the audio. Totally. Yeah. Totally. All right. So that's all coming so soon.

Like literally, that's what I was going to say. Yeah. My wife just got me some flights today, just an hour ago, and went, just check if this is all good. It's all paid for and whatever. Oh, cool. It's 10 a.m. Monday. You go on the Monday?

Yeah. What? Oh, nightmare. Well, I'm currently seeing if she can change it because I'm like, where? That's crazy because that means I'm going to have to be up at like five or six that morning after a massive day on the Sunday. I had a bit of an anxiety attack about it all the other night, but once we're there, it'll be fun. Yeah. Look, the podcast, I'm really looking forward to the London side of it.

It's the Belgrade thing that's worrying me. I agree. It's the fear of the unknown. Yeah, I agree. I don't know what I'm walking into. It's having to get over, it's having to get to London and then go somewhere else and then come back to London. You know what I mean? It's just, it's so much fucking around right at the start.

Well, here's the itinerary. So, you haven't got your flight yet, have you? No. I'm booking it in tomorrow. Yep. It's going, you know, it's the last day of the Comedy Festival in Melbourne. It's the Sunday night. It's the drunk cast.

We're going to get fucked up there. Wake up the next day, Monday. Basically, have that day to try and feel human, just to get through that feeling. And then, I think I fly Tuesday? Tuesday or Wednesday morning? I don't know. You don't. You just told me you fly on Monday.

No, no, no. Sorry, I'm saying I fly home from London on the Monday. Oh, okay. Oh, after we do the pods. After we do the pods. Okay, sorry. Right, right, right. Yes.

Right. You sounded like you'd lost your mind after just telling a story about getting your flight. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think I fly on this day. No, actually. So I fly on this day. No, actually, so I fly on the Wednesday in Melbourne. So do the drunk car Sunday night, fly Wednesday, get into London on the Thursday, then go to Liverpool for the Friday night match, then go to Serbia after that, back in time for the next weekend's gigs in London, and then fucking straight back after that back in time for the next weekend gigs in London

and then fucking straight back after that yeah so it's heck is bright interesting comedy no it's going to be fun I'm worried now that this just sounds like we're

to the listeners like we're completely depressed by our pretty cool lives I mean let's look let's spin this around. This is sick. This genuinely – Oh, it is great. I could never have imagined in my mid-20s that I would be in a position

where I'm getting to go and do shows in a place like Serbia where I never would have thought to travel before. It's awesome because of this stupid thing that people listen to. Nothing's without worry. It's like if someone rings me up and goes, do you want a Netflix special? It's like, that's amazing, but then you've got to fucking worry about that. No, I know, but we've just been bitching about it.

And people take things at face value, and I'm worried that it sounds to people like we're not excited and we're not appreciative, which we are. It's awesome. I literally am very excited about all of it, except for the show, an hour on stage in Serbia. In Serbia, yeah, yeah, yeah. But as soon as that's finished, I'm worry-free.

Also, I'm worried about Liverpool winning as well, going to the match and them still being in it and all of that sort of stuff. But I believe it's all under control. Like the whole itinerary and whatever on my side. I'm worried about you getting your flights and all that sort of stuff. I know. It's two of stuff. I know. It's two weeks away. I know.

I keep sitting down to do it and then other stuff comes up and then I emailed – this is the other thing. I keep emailing the travel agent and saying, let's get on the phone today and then he's out of office. So it's just us not being able to line up. Right. But he's back tomorrow. So I'm going to sit down with him tomorrow.

And tomorrow is the day where I'm going to get up and get it all finally locked in a paper. This is our dum-dum travel. Yeah, Kishan. Yep. I'm going to hit him up as well for these Serbian flights. Oh, yeah, yeah. Fuck.

So, yeah, hey, use him. Plenty of people have been using him for the Koh Samui trip. Not long to go for that as well. So please get into it. Let us know. Let us know if you're on the fence. He's in Perth so it's like I can't just get up in the morning and do it. I have to wait until midday here when he gets to work there.

Anyway, whatever. Yeah. Good shit. Koh Samui, that's coming up June 11 till 16. Plenty of time still. You know, it's not insane to book a holiday at the last minute. I'm essentially about to do it so well you're two months in one week so you basically got about nine nine or ten weeks

yeah so uh it's looking it's looking pretty good um there's still a discount go through our website hit us up directly if you want just find out how you can make it happen yeah always happy to help yep uh lovely um another way you can help to keep the wheels on this thing turning is jump onto patreon.com slash little dum-dum club. Chip in. And not only do you get the warm feeling in your heart of

contributing to your favorite little idiot podcast, but you get bonus features, you get a magazine, you get bonus episodes, you get in the private little group that we've got on Facebook. All that sort of bullshit which we haven't said anything about um whether we're doing a video in samui this year or not have we we've got to work that out no i would say given how much of a nightmare the last two years ones have turned into it would probably be wiser to not put that on the table yeah well let us, let us know, guys, if you enjoyed the last two videos.

It was good, but, I mean, third time should be a charm. Maybe we can somehow magically find a way of making all the process a lot smoother. But anyway, because they are great things to look at at the end of the day. Yeah, yeah. Great little memento. Yep. So get on to that. Of course, part of that deal is at some stage you may have the chance of having your name read out and immortalized in this segment, in the back end of the show, in Talking Dumb Dumb.

Yep. The best bit, a lot of people seem to think. Yeah, yeah. The people that love admin definitely love this bit better than the entertainment in the front half. So let's crack in. Let's push the big red button on the unplanned title alternator at least a bunch of times. You know, the names are starting to back up.

This machine is getting full. Really? It's getting clogged up. It is. Right. So let's do something. We need to defragment it. Yeah.

Let's get a bunch of them out this week. Yeah. Thank you to Patreon subscriber. His name rings a bell. I know who this person is. Thank you to Patreon subscriber Amanda Salmon. Amanda Salmon. Yeah.

Yeah. From Brisbane. She's from Brisbane. She's a long-term listener from Brisbane. I think she sort of stopped doing this, but she was cosplaying for a while. Yeah, she came as Dr. Dr. Ramsey to a live pod. Yes.

She was also on the show once where she, I think she turned up and she'd been dumped or something. Yeah, that day. The day before or something. No, no, she was Dr. Dr. Ramsey on a different. Yeah, I know. At a different time. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But then the dump thing that had happened the day before yes right so yeah thank you I had a chat

to her last time yeah but a few weeks ago she was yeah she was a sole survivor at the end of that Brisbane live pod

where a bunch of us were hanging out afterwards oh really she was yeah she was there kicking on into the wee hours oh yeah

god that was what oh no just that thing of going A bunch of us were hanging out afterwards. Oh, really? Yeah, she was there kicking on into the wee hours. Oh, yeah. God. That was... What? Oh, no. Just that thing of going... I'm always definitely one for going after a live pod. Hey, let's hang out with all these people that made the effort to come along. And then there's just so many nights where it's like, I got really fucked up and I didn't

need to be. Yeah. And it's like, I better hang out and talk to everyone. And all of a sudden, I'm sitting there. No one's wanting to talk to me. Yeah. I'm just sitting there drinking with a couple of mates. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You were pretty, yeah, we were both pretty blind by the end of it.

We had a very generous writer backstage at that gig. Yeah. That we were getting stuck into. Made more generous by the fact no one else on the show was drinking, I don't think, really. Yeah, because, well, they all had solo shows to go and do. Yeah. So then we got all of it. But a fun night.

Fun to hang out with Amanda Salmon. Yes. And her mother. Yes. Mrs. Salmon. If you may be so bold. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. One of the great things that we have when we go to the shows and people are very happy to point out, this person here doesn't know who you are. Yes. They don't know what the fuck this is. Yeah, they hate you. Yeah. Yeah, always appreciated.

Yes. I had a few of them in my solo show lately where it's like, I haven't advertised that show anywhere except for just saying to dumb dumb people, this is on. Yeah. And then people bring their friends and it's like, I make no effort to acquaint myself with any normal people. I'm up there from day one going, fucking, g'day everyone, duck sandwich, fucking got him.

It's very in. It makes, yeah, it makes the podcast look broad and accessible. Yes. Totally. Totally. You've got a chance with that thing. You've got no chance with my show. Yeah.

Yeah. So, anyway. Thank you. Thanks for dragging along people who... I wonder what the hit rate is when people get dragged along to the podcast. And stick with it. Yeah.

Yeah. I wonder if it's... It'd be lower than 50%, I reckon. I have been thinking that lately, that could we be making more of an effort to make this more accessible, 21 tuning in for the first time? Our normal studio episodes are.

Yeah. Because effectively you're talking to guests who you know don't listen. You know, comedians generally don't listen to this show. So we're not saying to fucking, you know, whoever comes on. All you had to do was pull out a name of someone that you know. Who is there? We're not saying Peter Hellier, you know. Yeah.

Ha ha, got Tim. Ha ha, dark sandwich. Like, you know, they're not into that. They don't know what the fuck, you know. It is weird though because, yeah, you're right. There is such a big catalogue of episodes that people could give to a friend that they're bringing along to kind of get them on board. People seem to just have not done that and go,

just come and sit up the front with me and be screamed at for an hour and you'll pick it up. Yeah. But, you know, again, I think it's okay. We don't, you know, you get to see three great comedians at these live shows. Hang on. Five.

Well, three additional ones. Three big name guests. Yeah. Yeah. Yes. Yes. God, three additional ones. Three big name guests. Yeah. Yeah. Yes. Yes. God, fuck. I'm doing the work for the listeners now.

But yeah, what were we saying? Oh, yeah, Amanda Salmon. Thanks, Amanda. Thanks, Amanda. As Ronnie Chang would say, Amanda Salmon. Salmon. Salmon. Salmon. Thanks, Mandy S. Thanks, Salmmon. Salmon. Salmon. Salmon.

Thanks, Mandy S. Thanks, Salmonella. Thanks, Mandy Fish. Thank you to Patreon subscriber. Well, this name rings a bell as well, but I don't know the person. But as the official sponsor of the show, at the top of the show that you mentioned before, thank you to Patreon subscriber Claire Larson.

Maybe related toarson. Ah. Hmm. Maybe related to Greg. Maybe. Maybe related to Gary on the far side of things. Oh, it's that spelling? I don't know. No. Gary Larson's with an O, isn't it?

Is it? Maybe. Yeah. I think it is. Is this with an E? It is. Okay. I wonder if she's in a relation.

To Greg? Yeah. No, to Gary. Oh, okay. Yep. I saw Greg last night. Did you? Yeah. How did you yeah i haven't seen him for a while he's good he's doing well i think his show is going well he said it's sold it's been selling good um that's good for him because i mean look i don't think he would mind me saying but a couple years ago i think i used to see him and he was having a very hard run of things. Yeah.

You know, because Greg's great at character stuff and maybe isn't as well regarded for his stand-up, even though he's a very good stand-up as well. Yeah. But his character stuff is very, very fun. Well, characters are like something different and it's easier for people to latch onto that. Whereas doing stand-up... So what you're saying is that's just, you know,

he's not that good after all. What? No, you're the one that just said he's not very well regarded for his stand-up. Not as well regarded. Not as well regarded. Okay. I think it's more like if you do characters,

people are like drawn to that because it sticks out and it's something different. Whereas when you're doing a straight stand-up show in the comedy festival, who gives a fuck? Yeah. Cause there's so many of them. Yes. I agree.

I agree. As we've, um, learned to our chagrin over the years, sometimes much to our chagrin. Um, but, uh,

yeah, Claire, let us know if you're any relation to Greg. Um, if you related to Claire Hooper. Oh yeah. But yeah. Cause you've got the same first name.

Yeah. The thing. Yeah. That would be good if that was an actual thing. That everyone with a first name was related to each other. Like if I had my child and my daughter and went, well, obviously her name is Carl, but what's her name we're going to give her? Right, so it worked the other way around. Yeah.

Yeah, okay. Oh, isn't she adorable? Little Carl Salmon. It would be cool if there was some kind of link to all first names. So it's like, by my parents deciding to call me Tom, I'm now a relative of Tom Cruise. So I get access to him. I can hit him up.

So when you're naming a child, you're like, okay, what famous people are there out there that I would be doing my child a favor by giving it this link to? Just so many kids called Mark and just hitting up Zuckerberg going, come on. Yeah, Mark can be back in vogue. So if that was the case, if that was how it worked, what would you have called your daughter? Liberace. Okay, and what's the thinking there? Try and get an access to the fortune.

Okay. If there's some sort of inheritance. Make a claim to it. Yeah, that's just floating around in the ether somewhere of the beloved entertainer. Yep, yep. Yeah. Okay. Liberace could be a girl's name.

Yep. You know, it's, it's, has there ever been, I'm going to look it up. Is there any other Liberace's? There must be. There'd have to be. Where's that name from, first of all? Like what country? Yeah.

Polish, apparently. Okay. Yeah. Right. That was his last name. I didn't really know the story. That was his last name. Oh, so he's... I didn't really know the story. That's his last name.

His first name was Lazio Valentino Liberace. Right. That's just his last name. So I was using it as a first name. Sorry, Liberace. You watched the Teller movie, didn't you? I did. It's pretty good.

Beyond the Candelabra? Yeah. Yeah. It was entertaining. Yeah. I liked it Beyond the Candelabra? Yeah. Yeah. It was entertaining. Yeah. I liked it. Yeah. I, um, yeah.

You know, I always think, I always rather see the doco than the dramatization. For sure. But, yeah. Is there a good Liberace doco out there, though? Ooh, good question. Um, I'm trying to find any other Liberaces. I guess there's got to be plenty, I guess, if that's a last name. I wonder if there's a first name, though, of Liberace.

Maybe not. So you think maybe him being famous and that being his surname, then that popularizes it as a first name. That's pretty great. I don't think anyone was thinking – I don't think the majority of people Were saying Oh Liberace Thinking

They were like saying to you Hey Dasolo Mr Liberace Yeah Yeah yeah yeah No I know but But that is still funny It's like people just

Casually In this country Referring to me as Dasolo And that takes off as a first name Yeah Liberace Can't find any first names? No.

I can't find any other. How are you looking for this, first of all? Are you just putting first name Liberace into Google? My first name is Liberace. I'm feeling lucky. There's nothing else apart from... Well, look, clearly there's only one famous person with the name

liberace attached yeah so i'm trying to wade through all the results to see if there's there's anyone anyone else in the world with a name liberace right it's not uh oh here we go yeah here we go he's struck oil someone well well it's it's only another person. This is all I've got. Someone else with the last name Liberace. It's not even the first name. There's an artist called Robert Liberace. Okay. What kind of artist is he?

Like a painter? A bullshit. No. Yeah, painter. Okay. Yeah. He's quite good too. Really?

What sort of stuff does he do? I'm showing you now. It's like whatever that means. Oh, that's pretty good. Yeah, it's pretty good. Yeah. Go to I'm showing you now. It's like whatever that means. Oh, that's pretty good. Yeah, it's pretty good. Go to his website. Not bad. It's like people.

RobertLiberace.com Reasonably, yes. Reasonably realistic and pretty cool. But what's he like on the fucking piano though? Yeah, that's the real test. Yeah. And, okay. I'm not finding anything.

I'm giving up. If your name is, if you've ever heard of someone with the first name Liberace, hit us up. Have I ever shown you any of my dad's paintings? My dad's a really good painter. Really? Yeah. Is he actually good? Yeah, yeah, he's good.

Are you biased? No, no, no. He's good. Wow. He does good paintings. What's he paint? He knows what he's doing. Sort of Bill Henson inspired kind of work.

Does he really or not? No, no, no. He does landscapes paintings. What's he paint? He knows what he's doing. Sort of Bill Henson inspired kind of work. Does he really or not? No, no, no. He does landscapes and stuff. Oh, okay. Yeah, he loves it. Loves going on a little holiday, taking the little easel out, setting himself up with a little beautiful vista there, getting the paints out and just going for it. You know what?

I would like to find some of my old drawings and show you because I think... Yeah, you've talked about your little comic strip that you used to do is that but like actual drawing like i used to do life drawing and stuff like oh really actually good yeah right i want to do life drawing i've been meaning for like two years to go and start doing life drawing classes but they're all at night which is like hard to factor in with gigs and stuff like that um i've been going to a lot of them um just without the pen paper just right just hanging out so you're just sitting there watching the nude models like and stuff like that? I've been going to a lot of them, just without the pen and paper, just hanging out. Just hanging out.

So you're just sitting there watching the nude models, like, I'll do the drawing when I get home. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's all mental imagery. I'm bad at multitasking, so right now I'm doing the, I'm taking it all in.

Photographic memory. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Nice, dude. Yeah. Nice. Yeah. I can't show you any of the works I've done.

Yeah. Because I've got a bit of a, then when I get home, I get a mental block. Yeah. So it's hard. Right, right. Yeah, very hard.

And how do you release that mental block? I just have to go back again the next night. Right, right, right. Yeah. We've talked on the show about your old comic that you drew when you were a kid called... Probably years ago. But you had a comic character called Conrad Rutt. I used to draw it with one of the avalanches at school.

Yeah. Look, I've got a heap of them. You know what? I've been begging you for years to try and find these because I'm desperate to see them. I've never seen them. They're probably in the filing cabinet that I cracked open in Maribor that time. In Maribor, right, right. Yeah. So I would love for you to see them. I've never seen them. They're probably in the filing cabinet that I cracked open in Maribor that time. In Maribor, right, right.

Yeah. So I would love for you to see them. Yeah, yeah. And see if they still hold up from 1993 or whenever I drew them. If you find them, maybe we could chuck them in a Patreon mag for that month. Fuck, that would be good. Yeah. Okay, all right.

Next time I go home to Maribor. Look for them, and then I can, with your permission, we'll put the originals and then I'll do a reboot. Okay. I'll do a 2019 Conrad Rutt reboot. Right. Conrad Rutt was a stick figure, but everything else in his world was not a stick figure.

Great. It was drawn properly. That's great. Yeah. What else? Can you remember any of the gags? What character traits did he have? No.

You know what we would do? We would sit there and get a pair of scissors and cut up magazines and newspapers and find... Oh, mixed media. Yeah. Great. Find the stupidest headlines or pictures and just write backwards and just build them into all the stuff. I like it.

Yeah. I remember he had a giant remote controlled peach yep yep i think you've told me about that yep whose catchphrase was now you can fuck my ass maybe i won't find him Is that our next t-shirt? A giant peach saying, now you can fuck my ass. That is a great catchphrase. It's great.

It's so good. I should not find, I should not look for them because nothing can beat just the idea of this giant evil remote control peach saying, now you can fuck my ass. I know. So, are you a bit worried that you'll find them and it's like you've been remembering with you know rose-colored glasses no i've got a strong feeling it'll hold up wow yeah how old so what you're like 15 no like 17 18 right something like that right um it was like yeah in in in school in like year 12 just in our diaries, just drawing these new... Fuck. The new Adventures of Conrad Rudd every day. Is that what it was called?

Oh, no. It had a different name every time. Oh, okay. But like the blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah of Adventures of Conrad Rudd. Right, right. Fuck, that's good. Yeah. Nothing was better than, yeah, drawing little comics at school.

Yeah. Yeah. Nothing was better than drawing little comics at school. I'm positive they'll hold up. I'll get them and I'll photocopy them. Fuck, it's a big claim. Something that you wrote when you were 17. Yeah, but I was pretty funny.

Yeah, but that's so long ago. That is one of the most wild statements you've ever made. I'd bet you anything. I'd bet you anything they'll be funny. made. I'd bet you anything. I'd bet you anything they'll be funny. Fuck. I'd bet you anything. Fuck. I remember putting, like, effort into them and going, no, these are good.

These are actually good. Yeah. I promise you. But it's so long ago. Man. It was a different world. It's fucking Seinfeld. It was the Seinfeld of its day.

Oh, my God. Okay. Still holds up. Okay. You could be flogging this on Seven Mate Conrad right now and it would be holding up. Seinfeld's back, baby. They took it off Seven Flicks for a little while and now it's back. The Dirty Double every night at 6pm. Because for a while they were doing three episodes in a row, which I loved.

Flying in the face of the old traditional double ep. Three eps. Perfect. Then it went off for a bit. Now it's back, but just two episodes in a row. Right. Six till seven and then mash. Fuck mash off and just get the third episode in there.

The worst. No good. Not into it. Never been into it. No. Very hard to get into. I remember it being like... I thought you liked it.

No. Okay. I respect it, but I don't like it. Right. I understand it. Okay. I respect it, but I don't like it. Right. I understand it. Yeah. I think Alan Elder's character in the earlier days, I understand that because it's based on Groucho Marx,

and so he's this wisecracking guy with heaps of one-liners. Cool. Great. Bugs Bunny. Nice work. And then the last bunch of years was just like, oh, how sad's the war? Yeah, you're right.

It is sad. Put it in a doco, not in a fucking comedy, you idiot. Yeah. I think I'm going to start getting into war docos, by the way. Really? Yeah. I don't know enough about them. Noxy was telling me about a good one.

So I think I'm going to load some up for the plane. That's a pretty sick move on a flight. Just watching World War II documentaries. Yeah. What am I going to do on the plane? I don't know. All right, thanks. Thanks, Greg Larson's sister, Claire Larson.

Thanks, Greg Larson's twin sister, Claire Larson. Thank you to Patreon subscriber Richard Francis. Dickie Francis. Interesting. This is a very interesting one. Dickie F. Why? Why is it so interesting?

I don't know. Don't you think it's an interesting sounding name? Yeah. Richard Francis. Do you like him off the scent of that, or do you not like him? I think he'd be very eccentric. Really? Yeah.

I think he'd have some pretty wild fashion sense. Particularly if he was actually called Dickie Francis, then totally. Yes. I mean, he's down here as Richard Francis. I've taken a bit of a liberty. I think he'd also have... I think he'd be a guy with some kind of weird affectation, like a cane that he doesn't need or something like that. You know what I mean?

You are smoting this guy. I'm smoting him good. That's not good. Now I can fuck his ass. Dickie F. Do people get called Dick anymore? I've said this before on the show, haven't I? That my granddad's nickname was Dick. And then it was like, oh, yeah, yeah, cool, because, you know, Richard.

And then it's like, no. Really? His name wasn't Richard. It was Ivan Redrup Chandler. Everyone called him Dick. Oh, yeah? I wonder why. Was he a good guy?

That is. Yeah, that is pretty great. Or if it was like people call you Dick and then you were like, oh, because my name's Richard. And they're like, oh, your name's Richard? Yeah, yeah. That's kind of worse. His middle name is Redrup, which I always found very odd.

Yeah, I've never heard that before. I've never heard that as well. Redrop Liberace Chandler. There we go. I'm looking up Redrop. All right, that's it. I'm getting back into it. What, R-E-D-R-O-P?

R-E-D-R-U-P, I believe. Redrop. Ivan Redrop. It's a first name because, I mean, it's got to be a... Here we go. This very unusual surname is locational. Wow. With oldie English pre-10th century origins.

Fuck, that is an old school name. The basic translation from old English is the Red Ford. What the fuck does that mean? The surname is well recorded in the London area in the 16th century. Okay. Nothing particularly interesting. It's a fucking old name.

Yep. Dickie Francis though. That's an interesting one. I'm picturing Yep. Red drip. Well, Dickie Francis, though. That's an interesting one. Yeah. Yeah, I'm picturing like, I'm picturing a guy in a cravat. You know, I'm picturing like a patterned shirt and then like a jacket that's also patterned and they kind of clash. You know what I mean? Just very loud, flamboyant fashion is what I'm picturing.

But my question still holds up. Do people get called dick these days? If you're Richard? I don't know. I think maybe kind of ironically. When was the last time you ever heard someone being called dick? Either out loud or on the written page. I think we've lost it.

Yeah, a friend of mine dated a guy called Richard and we called him Big Dick. Right. But that was behind his back. Yeah. And her back. Right. Are they not together anymore? Nah.

Was this... I've heard about this story, haven't I? Maybe. Right. I don't know. It wasn't entirely positive. No, it was fine. Okay.

Aha. Now I understand what's happening okay end of story says tommy that's i figure if the the statute of limitations is over if they're not together anymore yeah yeah they broke up yeah we used to call him They didn't break up from loving each other too much. Yeah, well, yeah. Yeah, we used to call this guy Big Dick. Right.

Behind her back. Behind his back. Yeah. We saw him in the street the other day. Yeah. That was pretty cool. Was it? Why was it cool?

Because I was with her and she went and hid. Oh. Yeah. Wow. Yeah. So shout out to Big Dick. Right. He's still out there roaming around the streets. On the loose. Yeah. So shout out to Big Dick. Right. He's still out there roaming around the streets.

On the loose. Yeah. Big Dicky. Big Dick. Was his last name Francis? But yeah, in terms of like a, like a, what do you mean? Like do people use Dick as a shorthand for their name, Richard? Like do they do that themselves?

Yes. Do they go, please call me Dick? Yes. Yeah, that must have been. But why was that ever a thing? Yeah, I don't know, because it doesn't lend itself to it. It's like... It's weird.

Dick, it's short for Richard. In what way? They share... I mean, Rich, you could say, if you're pronouncing that in the German style, I guess you could go Rick. Yeah, I guess. And that's similar to Dick. But it's like a...

But then why not just abbreviate it to Rick? Yeah, it's a word that has a bad connotation. Yeah. And it's not even... You're right, it's got like a couple of letters. It's like me going... My name's Malcolm. Please call me fuck.

Yeah, it's Thomas, but it's c me going my name it's my name's malcolm please call me fuck yeah it's thomas but it's cunt for sure there's a couple of the same letters in there that'll do yeah dicky all right dick well all right dicky francis i think we've just lost the name dick yeah i think that's it it's gone it's cancelled yeah what a shame uh-oh thanks dicky francis Francis. Thanks, Dickie F. Well, speaking of Dickie, thank you to Patreon subscriber Mickey Flykick. Oh, yeah. I know this guy. Yeah, this guy came to Coast of Millie, didn't he? He did.

He's another Brisbane listener. Yes. Oh, God. It's a real Brisbane-flavoured back end of this show. He has his own podcast or something, doesn't he? Yeah, I believe so. Mickey Flykick. I know this guy is good friends with a friend of the show, Nick Carr. He has his own podcast or something, doesn't he? Yeah, I believe so. He's a fly kicker. This guy's...

I know this guy is good friends with a friend of the show, Nick Carr. Oh, really? Okay. Yeah. Now, people, traditionally their surname dates back to what their ancestors used to do. Yes. So, do you think his great, great, great, great, great grandparents, just fucking ninjas? Yeah, just... They were just... they were like the Black Plague.

They wiped out millions of people. Right, by fly-kicking people to the head. Brain damage. Right, right, right. That's pretty cool. Why has this guy given himself the name Flykick? You get your chance at living on forever through having your name read out on this podcast. And you have your

little made-up name. Yeah. It's dumb. Imagine doing that. Imagine putting a made-up name on this podcast every week. Yes. I agree. What's your point, Tommy Dasolo?

I think your cat just grabbed my sunglasses. Did she really? Yeah. She's hanging out. See, she's not scared of you. She's scared of everyone else. Do you think the cat will let me put sunglasses on it? Yeah. She's hanging out. See, she's not scared of you. She's scared of everyone else. Did the cat let me put sunglasses on it? No.

Come on. Go on. Oh, it's actually letting me. No, it's not. Fuck, I got close though. No, it's never going to happen. I have to tell you. It barely likes being patted.

It's really annoying. I feel like, you know, we went... Here's a lesson to everyone. Don't go with aesthetics. It's like, I feel like I've got this hot girlfriend who just won't touch me. Right. Won't do, you know, doesn't, we have two single beds. Yeah, right.

Me and this hot girlfriend. You have passionless sex with the lights off. Yeah, well, not even that. Yeah, right. I don't have sex with my cat is what I'm trying to say. I thought that, sorry, I misunderstood. I thought that's definitely what you were getting at. No is what I'm trying to say. I thought that... Sorry, I misunderstood. I thought that's definitely what you were getting at. No, what I'm saying is...

She's letting you pet it now. Yeah, but she's not super happy. I wonder if she'll let me, even though I'm probably going to get sick now. There we go. She's loving this. Look at this, two at once. I think she's settled a little bit at the moment, going, I don't want to move, so I'll put up with this for a bit, but you'll get it.

She'll get out of it in a minute, I reckon. There you go. Yeah, she's loving this with this for a bit, but she'll get out of it in a minute, I reckon. There you go. Yeah, she's loving this. She likes a bit of a scratch. She is very upset at the moment with the baby in the household. Oh, yeah, not into it? Yeah. She doesn't dislike the baby, but she knows that she's not getting as much affection.

Right. We got warned about this. You put her on notice. She's been put on notice. Yeah, so she's- Got the tap on the shoulder. So anyway, she's looking for affection at 1 a.m.,, 3am, 4am, 5am on the dot every night, which is really helping my shit out.

Now she's going to sleep. Yeah, well, why wouldn't you sleep during the day when you've been up all night waking me up? Fucking hell. Fucking hating it. Well, thanks, Mickey. Thanks, Mickey. Fly kick. I do like Mickey.

I like his short for um michael yeah i'm into that mickey mickey i don't know why not undecided because of the because it because of the common connotations of it being the famous mouse no because of the connotations of being slipped to Mickey. Ah, right. I had a friend, there was a guy that we, I didn't particularly know him. There was a guy in Maryborough called Mickey J. That's his nickname, Mickey J. And I don't know what, you know those things that just stick in your head forever? Yeah.

I remember one of my friends coming to school one night, one day, and saying, I had a dream about Mickey J last night. Like, oh, yeah, that's weird. What happened? He just came up to me and went, the J is for juice. Wow. Yeah. Like OJ.

Yeah. It just stuck with me. I like that. Thanks, Mickey J Flykick. Did you ever ask him about it? Did you ever ask Mickey J about it, whether the J was for juice? No, because he was a guy that I feel like I shouldn't have been asking that of. Okay. Right.

Yeah. Yeah. Lots of just the weird people that you run into around the area of your friends when you grow up in Maribor. Yeah. It's quite an interesting place. Right. Anyway. Thanks, Mickey. Thank you too, Pete.

Let's do one more. My baby needs to be fed. The cat is getting irritable. We've got through quite a few. Like I said at the top of the show, we needed to through quite a few like i said at the top of the show we needed to get through a few and yeah i feel like we have nearly cleared the decks is it still looking overstuffed or is it looking after so many that we've done yeah we've really powered through heaps yeah we've we've really got through a few um less much less of a backlog now yes

definitely i can i can see we've had to we've had to work way harder than normal but worth it yeah way more than we usually do but great you know just because we've done that if you've subscribed

in the last however long you know that your name is a lot closer than what it was before the start of this episode marvellous

yes thank you too one more for this week thank you to Patreon subscriber Dick Comedy. Right.

So there is one after all. I think I was just saying before. Was it this week or last week when I was talking about that? I think it was like a month ago or something. Okay, right. I can't keep track. Yeah. I think I was saying, it was me or you,

saying that the name Dick doesn't usually get used as a first name. So they put down as Dick Comedy. It's not like, it doesn't say Richard Comedy. No, no, no. It's just like assumed. I haven't taken the liberty. Right, interesting. That is really interesting.

Yeah, thank you. You're welcome. It might be, maybe it's an abbreviation for Ivan Redrup Comedy. Who knows? Right. But they haven't got that detail there. That seems to me like the most plausible thing that's happening here. Yeah.

That's most likely. It does ring a bell. Yeah. Dick comedy. So that, yeah, I mean, I guess that's one guy that we know of. There's at least one example. Well, now that, I mean, if that's the case, then there must also, I mean, there'd have to be heaps of others, you'd assume.

Well, you think the dicks are multiplying? I do, yeah. Yeah. I think there's a lot of dicks out there. Yeah, you'd like that, wouldn't you? Yeah, I would. Because you like that as a name. It's a nice name.

Yeah. I'd like that too. I'd like heaps of them. You'd like heaps of dicks? Yeah. Yeah. I wish there was one right here now. Right.

Yeah. What would you do if there was a dick right here in front of you? Right. Well, I mean, I guess that'd be hard because I'd, you know. It'd be hard. Yeah. Because I don't know anyone called that. And if they just suddenly appeared here standing up rigid right in front of me.

Yeah. I'd be like, what the fuck are you doing here? So I'd probably grab him and like, you know, force him towards that hole. I mean, the door. Right. You'd push him into the. Yeah. you'd push him into that opening yes definitely right right and then what what if he doesn't want to go through the opening and he kind of well if you didn't want to go in the front if you didn't want to go in the front i'd be only too happy yeah to force him into the uh the rear exit for force him out the rear exit, you mean? Yeah.

Well, I mean, it's also an entry to the outside world. The outside world. Yeah. I see what you're saying. Yeah. Right. That's what I would do. Right.

Yeah. Weird question, but I guess, does that satisfy you? I guess. I feel very satisfied now. I feel extremely satisfied. You look like you're not quite, you look like you're going to be satisfied. You sort of look to me like I look when I go to the life drawing sessions without a pen and paper. Well, I mean, I've got the pen, that's for sure.

You've got a 6B fully sharpened right here. Have you got a rubber? Anyway, bring your friends along to this show. 43 and 32. Jesus Christ. It's good stuff. Drag your friends along. It's a good night out.

Isn't it nice to know? Did you ever feel when you were a kid and you'd have so much fun just being absolutely juvenile and sort of like having it said to you by teachers or parents or whatever that there's an expectation that you'll grow up one day? Yeah. And I remember that sort of scaring me because I'm like, I'm having so much fun being like this. Right.

I don't want to grow up and mature. but then it's nice to hit an age like i'm 32 now and it's like this is it yeah i'm never gonna change yeah and it's it's nice it's a relief no it's a relief to know that i never had to give up finding it funny to talk like this i've devolved anything yeah absolutely yeah i am much less intelligent and refined than I was when I was like 21. Yeah. When I was, I would watch comedy at like that age and go, you know, anything a bit coarse or yuck or dumb. Yeah.

That's dumb. I need smart comedy. Yep. Now that is boring. I would love to see what I at 18 would think of my comedy now. Yeah. Right. You know?

Yeah. Me at 18, would think of my comedy now. Yeah, right. You know? Yeah. Me at 18 listening to this pod. I think I would be into this pod at 17. I really don't know. I'm trying to think what I was into at that age. What sort of comedy I was into. I think I'd be fine. As long as it was like on the radio every week or something,

I'd be like, oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll listen to that. That's all right. I've got a bit of a hooker. I understand how the tropes of this thing. Yeah, yeah, probably. Yeah, I think I'd be all right with it.

Anyway, thanks, Dick. Thanks, Dick. Thanks, Dick Comedy. Thanks, Dick Comedy. Yep. Dick Comedy. It's almost like a, what's that word? Dichotomy.

Dichotomy. Dichotomy. Yeah, you're right. It is almost like that. Yes, I am right. It is almost like that. Dichotomy dichotomy yeah you're right it is almost like that yes I am right it is almost like that dichotomy

it depends on what your definition of the word almost is it's fucking pretty similar it's a lot fucking closer than Dick and Richard Dick comedy

Dick comedy and dichotomy dichotomy yeah I guess it's dichotomy is D-I-C-H-O-T-O-M-Y yeah

that's fucking close yeah well you've learned something Yeah, I guess. Dichotomy is D-I-C-H-O-T-O-M-Y. Yeah. That's fucking close. Yeah. Well, you've learned something this week, folks. Tell me a word that is closer to dick comedy than dichotomy. Oh, okay. Tell me one word. Write in, folks. Send your answers into UpTheBumNoBabies, CrowsNest, 6969.

Yeah, self-addressed envelope. Alright, thanks guys. Thanks for listening. Thank you very much for supporting the show if you are someone who does that. Come out and see us at a live show. We're all over the world at the moment. LittleDumbDumbClub.com and we'll see you next week. See you, mates.