The Little Dum Dum Club with Tommy & Karl - 641 - Brett Blake & Lehmo

Episode Date: January 18, 2023

This week we're joined by BRETT BLAKE and LEHMO! Brett's off the beers for a little while, so what better time to reminisce about some of our stupidest drunken escapades including Brett's trip to the casino and Lehmo getting kicked out of the cricket. PLUS we get a long overdue follow-up on Brett and Karl's trip to Bangkok and heaps, heaps more! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Today on The Little Dumb Dumb Club, a great new episode with guests Brett, Blake and Limo. We have some live tour dates coming up that you can come and catch us at. You can see us in Adelaide, Saturday, March the 11th at the Rhino Room, 2.30 in the afternoon. That's it, Tommy. Nice little afternoon pod. You can go and live the rest of your life in Adelaide after you see us. It's a good timing. And then we've got the Saturdays in April as part of the Melbourne International Comedy Festival. Saturday, April the 1st, 8th, 15th and 22nd at Morris House.

Morris House, the new name for the European Beer Cafe, Tommy. We'll talk more to you at the end of this episode in Talking Dum Dum, but until then, enjoy this great new one with Brett Blake and Limo. Hey, mates. Welcome once again into the Little Dum Dum Club for another week. Thank you very much for joining us. My name is Tommy Daslow. With me, as always, the other half of the program, Carl Chandler.

G'day, dickhead. Joining us today, two very special guests. Tommy Dasolo are what you say you are. You should, can we give his name to you? You look like more of a limo than he does. Yeah, but I don't want to yell out my own name. I love, I drive past you frequently and I scream at you out of our vehicles.

I've done it like twice now. It's one of my favourite things to do. Just out the window going, limo! Loving it. It is good. I got you on a motorised scooter the other day.

I walked past you and your child just, limo! I would have gone, oh, li-no. L Just, Limo! I would have gone, oh, Lee, no. Limo! Limo! That actually sounds like what you should say when you're popping a wheelie.

Limo! Limo! I had a photo shoot today because I'm a big star. Oh, yes. And the guy doing the photo shoot, the photographer, James Penlead, he's a very well-known photographer. Yeah, just an Interesting bloke. Different comedians. Anyway, James was running late, so he did a Siri text message.

Right. Here we go. And then, but I never received the text. And then we turn up, then his phone starts ringing, and the phone says limo, which is a guy, a mate of his who drives a limo. Right. His phone is limo. That guy got the text message. Oh, great. The limo, which is a guy, a mate of his who drives a limo. Right. His phone is limo. That guy got the text message.

Oh, great. The limo. Saying, I'm running late. And the limo driver's just like, what do I care? Also, I love. Yeah, the limo driver's like, what are you even talking about? He's probably panicking. He's like, think of his next customer or something.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Fuck. Also, I love the idea that this guy's name is limo, just named after what he drives. Yeah, yeah, yeah. His name is Limo. He was always going to be a limo driver. Yeah, right.

That guy. But Blakey's got the Bogan look perfect. He's got the beards looking great, the mullet, the hat, everything. The vaguely, I know that must be a brewery t-shirt, but it's mocked up to look like a white metal band. Yes, yeah, yeah. I've got that in a hoodie. The mill. Yeah, the mill. Great, great local brewery t-shirt, but it's mocked up to look like a white metal band. Yes. Yeah. I've got that in a hoodie. The mill. The mill.

Great, great local brewery. And then I've got, to top it all off, the Bundaberg slides. Oh, my. And they're matching your dog, might I add. White and fluffy. There's a chance Blakey will put your dog on his right foot as he heads out the front door. But you've undone all of it with what you're drinking. No.

Zero alcohol beer. No, but I say I disagree. I think that's more bugging because he's off the beers at the moment. So he's still drinking beer even when he's not drinking beer. This is actually my sixth non-alcoholic beer today. Fuck. That's great. You've got a problem.

I know. I'm aware. That's why I'm on the zeros. No, Bowman, you've got a You've got a You've got a problem I know I'm aware That's why I'm on the zeros No Bowman You've got a problem with zeros You're drinking Are they Because most like

Non-alcoholic beers They're like 0.5 Is that one of them So if you've had six You've had almost half a midstream Can you shut the fuck up about that Can you shut up about that Because that's one thing

My missus doesn't know She's like Why have you had 12 I'm like Man I've also got a headache Can I have some liquid Panadol? I'm sculling shit, you know? I had a big night on the heaps normals during the Feb Files.

Just like smashing so many of them and getting to the end of being like, all right, nice. I think I've had one beer by now. Not too bad. I can't drive. I've had two slabs of zero alcohol beer. Cody went sober for a year and he told me he didn't lose any weight. I was like, how the fuck do you not lose weight?

And I'm like, now I get it. Like I'm eating ice creams. I'm eating shit food just to get all. I never thought I was a food guy. You're drinking non-alcoholic beer. It's not the alcohol isn't the thing that makes you fat. It's all the other. It's the sugar and shit in you.

You may as well just pound Sunkist all day. Yeah, I normally don't. I normally have like one meal a day and then the rest of it's set aside for drinking. That's where all my calories are in. Sure, sure. And now I'm doubling down. I'm having two meals. I'm having dessert.

I didn't know I was a desserts guy. Is food to you just an annoying interruption to your day? Fucking oath it is. No, that's an entree. Non-alcoholic carbs. You need to get the base lunch in so you don't get too maggot, and then you go from there. I like this thing because you're saying you're allocating calories. I love the idea of you sculling beers and counting calories

as you're doing it. Man, if you look at my – I've got that MyFitnessPal or whatever the fuck it is. If you look over my history, it's like tuna, brown rice, a salad, and then it's got like 47 bits. I add them in and it's like, oh, man, I'm over for the day. Better switch to whiskey. Oh, man. Have you ever shotgunned zero alcohol?

Oh. Skull. Skull. All right, guys. Do a shooey. It has to be a thongie. Down the Bundy slider. I remember that bloke at the Tour de France last year who he won a leg at the Tour de France and got the champagne.

And the bloke doesn't drink. He rides a bike 900 kilometres a day. So he's never opened champagne before. He was leaning over the champagne bottle and someone was helping him and the cork went straight in his eye. He had to withdraw from the Tour de France. What? That's nothing to do

with not drinking. That's called being a fucking idiot. Of course that thing's going to pop into your eye. Have you not existed in life before? That's showing you've

never won anything before in your life. What's this champagne? Yeah. Sully, the good name of alcohol. I'm not a doctor but you don't need

a fucking eye to ride the Tour de France. If you've got one good one you can figure the rest out. It's all in good name of alcohol. I'm not a doctor, but you don't need a fucking eye to ride the Tour de France. If you've got one good one, you can figure the rest out. It's all in the leg, surely. It's pretty straight, isn't it? You don't need to look out for things. It's not Mario Kart. It's like one eye.

I mean, your depth of field might be out, but who cares? I mean, sure, someone crashes into a spectator every five seconds down those hills, but still, whatever. He tried the next day, but just rode in circles. Man, Lance Armstrong did it with one nut. So what's your fucking excuse? One eye? Did that get taken out by champagne cork as well?

Is that how that works? That's your thing when you enter the Tour de France. One eye, one leg, one arm, onesie. Big old onesie. What if that tips you over the bike? You've got to have perfect balance. You're missing one eye. Oops.

See you later. No, you need to counter. You got to have perfect balance. You're missing one eye. Oops. See you later. No, you need to take a testicle out on the other side. And put it in your eye socket. Man, we find out that Nick Capper wins a Tour de France this year. He's perfectly weighted now. Bonjour. Bonjour. I don't know French, sorry.

No, that sounded good. Is that your favourite brand of the non-alcohol beer? I'm actually trying to go through them. The best one, the one that's closest is the Heineken Zero. Heineken tastes like shit, but Heineken Zero tastes like shit. So it tastes the closest to a beer. They've nailed it. So Heineken shit and it tastes like shit.

They're consistent. You can't tell The difference between Those two shit beers This one actually I can't believe It's still shit Yeah yeah

You're like Oh they've nailed it Some of them taste Like chemicals This one Hop Nation Is actually fucking good Oh yeah they're good

I'm gonna give it Like it's probably Like a 9 out of 10 Oh okay It's like a It won a beer award Or something like that So

In the scale of things Have you Are you reviewing these On social media or something Well yeah we've got a beer award or something like that, so in the scale of things. Are you reviewing these on social media or something? Well, yeah, we've got a beer show that we do during the comedy festival called The Brew Dudes, so we do beer reviews on our social media, so I've got to keep it going, even with non-alcoholics. And I'm getting a lot of abuse from people calling me a soft cock and telling me to kill myself.

So pretty standard stuff, to be honest. Is that the looper version of you? Yes. That's why I respect it because I would normally be doing it. So what are you trying to do here? Are you trying to do a year? Look, let's not put a time or date stamp on this. Let's not even put a time on today.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's vodka in that non-alcoholic beer, isn't there? Yeah, oh, man. 0.5. So you haven't had any beers this year? Or no booze at all this year? No, I did a month off. I was trying to.

So you're about two months off at this point. So, yeah, I'm calling a year because every time, if I do a month, like around 20 days, I give up. So I'm like, if I call out that I'm doing a year and I last six months, I'm going to be fucking stoked. If I make the whole year, I can't imagine it though. There's a wedding

towards the end of the year. I'm going to get fucked up at that. But yeah, I'm just trying to, I did the month before Christmas. You and beer. Is the wedding you and beer? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

No, no, we were already married. Actually, we're divorced. It's taken half of me. Half of my liver. But no, no. So a month before Christmas, then home at Perth with the parents, obviously needed a drink to get through that. Absolutely.

Oh, my God. Fucking hell. And then back to being sober. Right. What? Well, California sober. Sorry. I'm still on the weed, baby.

Do you enjoy it? Do you enjoy not drinking? Too long. You should have seen the look on his face. I actually edited the pause down to it. I went for like 15 minutes. There were tears forming. The sun went down by the time I responded.

I like parts of being sober As in like being able to function Not having panic attacks in the morning No but I like parts of You know I love drinking Like I love You know you go to the beach You have a fucking beer But the problem is like I

You know if I'm Like I'm home alone today I would have started drinking at 2 o'clock Look you I reckon in the last Whatever it's been Two weeks You would have drunk more

non-alcoholic beers than I've drunk beers. Yeah. So you are committed to the art form, whatever it is. What time of the day do you have your first non-alcoholic beer? Oh yeah, can you have them earlier? Yeah, exactly. Well, that was the problem. So yesterday I was hot.

Watch the cornflakes. I had one at 10am. Oh. So there you go. Well, this is the other benefit You rocked up to my house With that in hand Just you walking down the street

Crashing it like it's a solo Dude I If that was an actual beer And you just turned up Drinking it in the street We'd all be like Jesus Dude I've done that

At least four times For this podcast And we've all had A discussion about it After we've left This isn't the podcast Is this the intervention again Yeah

Confusing for cops. Well, that's... I drink five a round with a glass bottle, but I like to... I mean, I've got a joke about the whole fucking thing, but I like to leave the windows down and just watch people look at me. And I'm like, that's right, I'm a mad cunt.

In my Ford Focus. I'm the coolest bloke going. Could you get in trouble? Well, Because they technically Do have like 0.5% And like in parks Where they're like

No alcohol allowed After certain times Or whatever You'd be pretty They'd have to be To be like Al Capone On tax evasion It's like

You've done something Yeah They'll do you for A taillight But also I guess They would do you for If you're like you And you're hanging yourself

Out the window going Fucking jerk it out, guys. No court can convict me. That's true. A court has convicted me recently. I lost the last contention. Did you really? Have you lost a court case?

Yeah, yeah, during lockdown. Because I couldn't go in. I couldn't go in. You and the fellas marching along the Westgate and hauled into the next day. File up. File up. Finally came second. Wow.

Man, the mighty fell and fell hard so i i had uh 12 speeding tickets and no it was maybe it was eight i had a fixed camera during lockdown the same camera might i add you fucking dogs it was hidden behind a thing anyway you got eight yeah how far oh the same week oh you got eight Yeah Space to part How far Oh the same week Oh you got eight The same week

Yeah yeah Same camera That's bullshit Yeah that's a scam Hang on I can get it seven Because you've gone past it every day Did you

It's weird that it's not fourteen Because he's gone the other way No I'm going to and from Right To work The camera's only The camera's only facing one way. It doesn't turn around.

No, no. This one has one way and one the other way. It's one of those ones that's hidden behind a sign, which is definitely there to save lives. So that means you didn't turn up to work one day then, if it got you eight times. I don't know the maths, Carl. Don't break my head.

One of them could have been on a fucking Monday as well. It was all the space. Two weeks. There you go, Carl. Sorry, there you go. I might need your help at a certain point, because I'm waiting on a new parking permit to turn up was all in the space of two weeks. There you go, Carl. Sorry, there you go. I might need your help at a certain point because I'm waiting on a new parking permit

to turn up. Like, mine's out of date. The council are a joke. You just send them too aggressive emails. And I put a little thing on my windshield saying, hey guys,

I'm waiting for my permit. Just go easy on me. God, I am racking them up. The note is doing fuck all. I might need your help to go contest all of these. Did you print out when you bought,

when you got your thing approved and then you paid for it, you got to put that receipt up there? Oh, well, I haven't done that. Well, that's what your problem is. I mean, now that you know, no, but I'm giving you all this evidence as my lawyer.

Yeah, but you can then backtrack. I'm just giving you full, you know, disclosure. So to the date that you submitted your application, then with those ones, you can go in and contest. Okay.

Because I reckon no one would ever lie doing that, would they? Saying they're waiting for their permit. Yeah. No one would ever just write that up and put it in. Just to see how they go. Your Honour, what's in it for anyone to lie about this? Man, I've had some corker lies to the judge.

It's great. I was assisting an old lady who passed out in front of a tram stop. Oh, wow. No, that wasn't a lie. That happened. Really? The jury sees that. That's why I was in a loading zone for two hours.

Aren't you like perjuring yourself by going on a podcast and saying, I lied in court? When did I say that? I was joking. This is a character I'm doing. I don't know. This is a comedy podcast. It's a comedy podcast. doing. I don't know. This is a comedy podcast. Yeah, it's a comedy podcast.

I mean, I don't even have a car. I just made that story up about the car. I'm just a character. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's not even drinking a beer. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's all just part of the thing. Boys, I think we can all agree, Chris Lilley's done it again.

I don't know why Brett has to be Aboriginal to be in this group. Probably didn't have to do the same thing. On an audio medium, there's no need to black out But yeah Chris, come on Really inappropriate And it's not factoring Into the character at all

Guys, I've said it before And I'll say it again You can't do anything anymore I know You can't say anything Well, you're off the beers Now, I would say One of the last times

I've seen you Really on it Would be Maybe this was one of the signs That you've decided To have a break from it. Because last time we did a live show in Perth, we went to the casino afterwards.

And we stayed in the same place. It was like a terrible, let's say, hotel. And it had a very generous happy hour deal where they were pouring metho and putting a bit of cordial into it and selling it for about five bucks the Collingwood

cocktail yes yeah yeah very nice stuff so then we went to the casino and there was one point where

we'd been going quite a while and you'd been going quite a while and you pull out your phone and you go fuck this

and you open Uber and you go I'm getting a fucking Uber to the casino and I go Brett we're in the casino

and you're like oh fuck really yes i did not remember that you tried to get an uber to the casino from the casino oh man that's really good i stayed at the casino over christmas and i i was getting like i was walking around and i was getting a lot of flashbacks you know what i mean i was like I remember doing something fucked here. And then I went to the same... There was a few drivers waiting for you out the front. Yeah, yeah. To take you one centimetre. Well, I went to the restaurant we got told to behave at,

but then forgot about that till I walked in and I got a few little looks from people who worked there, like, oh, he's back. Right, right. You really think it's appropriate to come back, do you? Yeah, yeah. There was some bad behaviour. Had a few looks.

And also, there was some bad behaviour given that I remember we were talking about not too long ago, you and Milan were going, yeah, fucking Charlie, you've been a real fucking idiot

trying to tell us to shut up. And I go, I'll tell you exactly what you said. This, this, this and this. And you go, oh, fair enough. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, the hindsight's beautiful oh fair enough yeah yeah yeah i mean hindsight's

beautiful yeah yeah so what was the what was what was the bad behavior in the we can't look yeah they moved us to a different room they moved us yeah they moved us into a room and then they came in and like padded room yeah they pretended like they were doing it like for us like what what you know like an blue chip customers. But we were the only people with a door behind us. Like they just shut the door. And then we just got louder because there was a door there. You think you're soundproofed.

Yeah, yeah. And then they come in and go, literally like they dropped all pretence and went, we just fucking gave you your own fucking room. Like we thought you'd appreciate that. And now you're going to fucking amp it up and start yelling cunts and stuff like what what the fuck are we supposed to do with you and i'm like the goal the goal of being over here i mean like god there are animals over in perth that realm of like being at the casino and trying to book an uber to the casino i love that's like

a that's like such a specific like next level realm of drunk. My friend was at a Christmas party just at the end of last year and leaving the Christmas party to go to dinner with a group of people, full Uber, she's in the front, talking the whole way through, just uninterrupted. And at one point, someone in the back of the Uber goes, who are you talking to? And she goes, James. And they go, James isn't in this Uber.

Just great. Just complete spatial. Like I've been, you know, I like, I don't think I've been that drunk too many times in my life where just like complete spatial awareness is just absolutely gone. It's beautiful. My mate got kicked out of a pub in Albury and they said like, like maybe it was a second time in the day. And we saw him out the front.

He got kicked out for a second time in one day. Yeah, yeah, so he got back in. Well, that's on them. The first bouncer clocks off, new bouncer comes in to do a new shift. Oh, yeah, and you're across the street with a newspaper with the eyes cut out. I'm on here.

Went around the back, snuck back in to the pub. They kicked him out again. He walked across the road to get a pie or some shit, came back in and then he walks up to the same bouncers thinking it's a different pub and goes, boys, I don't know if you'll let me in because the cunts down the road kicked me out. And they're like,

it's us. And we're like in the window just going, you're a fucking idiot. You're the dumbest prick I know. That must have been some pie. All of a sudden I was down the street. I tell you what, these 0.5 alcohol pies,

they've done me in. He was just slagging off the bounces to them. They're fucking idiots over there. Oh my God. He's not with us. That's great. Oh man. I got kicked out of the cricket once.

Yeah, but that's easy. That's an eight hour day. Something bad's going to happen. Before a ball had been bowled. Oh, that's good. Now we're talking. That's good. I like that.

And that was for swearing too loudly. Oh. What? Hurry the fucking cunt up, cricket. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was... We had a couple already. It was early.

It was a one-day game at Adelaide Oval. And it was, you you know in poor taste but I was doing I was doing a harker I was trying to replicate what? no no I was trying to

that's that's a bit that's a bit crook that's coming from Chris and Liam likewise over here no no there was

I'm trying to for context there was this there was this ad campaign that year this is early 90s there was an ad campaign that involved

that involved a harker so I was. There was an ad campaign that involved a harker. So I was trying to replicate the ad campaign. It was a tribute to the ad. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I see. I was paying homage to the little girl. It was a homage. Anyway, please come over.

Because there was a bit of swearing involved and they go, right, you're out. And all my mates are like, yeah, get rid of him. He's been annoying. That's not half of you. You haven't even seen half of it. Fantastic. So I get – they kind of drag me out. Not that I put up a fight.

Anyway, I lost a thong in the scuffle. You'll appreciate this, Blakey. So I get kicked out. I owe you a thong. And I'll tell you what, it's weird getting kicked out of a venue as people are arriving. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I see families are walking into the cricket

as I'm getting thrown out through the Victor Richardson gates. And I've got one thong. I was trying to watch some succulent cricket. Don't you know who I am?

I'm Limo. Are you Limo at this point? At what age did you become Limo? Did you become Limo through this act? This is pre any.

So your friends are just, oh, Anthony. This is your origin story. I'm a furniture removalist at this point. Are you me? This is pre-NE. So your friends are just, oh, Anthony. This is your origin story. I'm a furniture removalist at this point in my life. Are you me? Does my career get better? This is before I even

got a job as an accountant. I'm a furniture removalist. So you're being removed. You're being treated like a common couch. You're being removed. Did you give them like boys bend at the hips?

You know what I mean? When you're lifting me out, make sure you use your knees, not your back. They're fridging me. You've got to do your back, son back son Please put a padded blanket over me So you don't scratch me up This is what I do

You're limoing me And they tied me Into the back of the paddy van Right So I wouldn't move So they kicked me out So I had a wallet on me that day right And I had the wallet

Hanging over my footy shorts right Because I didn't have any pockets Sure So in this initial scuffle With the police, my wallet also fell out, right? Yeah. So I get kicked out with one thong no money, right? And it's like not even 11 a.m. Were you Chris Franklin?

It wasn't even 11 a.m., right? And I had a mad mullet at the time too, right? Oh, my Lord. I'm loving all this. I get kicked out. And then I go to the nearest pub which is the queen's head right and i walk into the queen's head and i knew the landlord you get into a pub wearing one thong yeah i knew that and it was a cricket pub but i knew the bloke right so

i go in and i say g'day to him goes what happened i said i fucking kicked out anyway so i said i left my wallet there as well can you run me a? So he runs me a tab for the day. So I order a drink, but the best thing is, because it's the closest pub to the cricket, and back then loads of people used to get kicked out. All day, a person walks in and be like, hey, mate, what'd you do? And he goes, ah, fucking beach ball.

And then we'd see the next person, oh, what'd you do, mate? Ah, fucking fight. That's a real party, yeah. This is great. And every time, hey, did you find my thong? Nah. Okay.

This is a great Limo landing on his feet story. No money, one shoe, still let in and allowed to drink on the landlord. I love it. Very Limo. Also, I reckon no thongs is better than one thong. Better than one thong. Because it looks like you're in control with no shoes on. It's like I've made a choice.

I've deliberately chosen to leave. It's hot. I've come straight from the beach or whatever. One thong is, I am, there's some problem with me. For sale, one limo

thong. Never worn. I can't remember if they returned my thong, my mates, at the end of the day. They gave me my wallet back.

Did they end up at the Queen's Head or they're just like, this guy's a liability, we've got to cut him out as well. I saw him there at the Queen's Head or they just like... They came to the Queen's Head. This guy's a liability. We've got to cut him off. I saw him there after the cricket. But on the drink driving, right?

So a mate of mine was terrible. This is back in the 90s as well. Was a terrible drink driver. Like pretty much every... He just drove everywhere, right? Right. And one night, he gets up in the morning and he'd been out the night before but left his car,

right? So he got up in the morning for work. He's hung over, rings a cab, cab comes to the house and he gets the cab to where he parked his car the night before, which actually was at the Queen's Head, the same pub I was at. It's in the car park at the Queen's Head, right? And he gets... Is it still there?

It gets to Cab there. Also... Queen's Head, yeah, it is. Lemo's still got the tab going. That's why he shouted out all the time. Knock 50 off that one, boys. Yeah. So he gets to Cab there, It gets a cab there. Queen's Head, yeah, it is. Lemo's still got the tab going. That's why he shouted out all the time. Not 50 of that one, boys. So he gets a cab there, gets out of the cab. Car's not in the car park.

So he rings the police, reports his car stolen. So does a full report with police, right? And then he goes to work, gets home that night, and his car's in the driveway. He'd forgotten that he'd driven home the night before. How did he miss it in the driveway when he walked out

the fucking door? He was he knew how to do a hangover. Yeah okay. Alright. So he had no memory

of driving. Well it was a different time folks. I'm not laughing. It was a different time. Some would say the golden era. And that person would be me

look this will lead us into I've got something to talk about to both of you guys but there is there's a real renaissance

of Thai restaurants in Melbourne at the moment I'm fucking loving it because in the city like in Bourke Street a lot of people that listen to this show

hit me up. They come to Melbourne and they go, where should I go for Thai food? If you're in the city, it was always like, there's not really that much.

All of a sudden, it's fucking packed. There's like authentic Thai restaurants in Bourke Street and the main street and as soon as they open up because they're authentic,

there's just lines down the street. Yeah, like that one near Spleen is always fucking grand. So many of them are near where you run rooms too. Yeah.

That's a strange coincidence. Yes. Driving through the city the other day, I'm like, there's a lot of Wang joints in Thai restaurants. It's like they've really

figured it out. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They're following you everywhere, Gar. Especially that one near Spleen because that's my favourite one and I've still never been to it because I refuse to line up for it. But it's in a car park

for anyone that hasn't seen it in Melbourne. Oh yeah, I went there recently. It's good? Yeah. Yeah, it's supposed to be really good. But how insane is it that it's in one of those proper high-rise car parks like there's there's you'd be lucky to find a drinks vending machine and all of a sudden there's a thai restaurant inside a fucking car yeah i guess it is very like in

japan there's lots of stuff just like in the train station and stuff like that we'll have good restaurants in sure but not in melbourne in Melbourne. Yeah, yeah, no. It's crazy in Melbourne to have one. I mean, you wouldn't go, oh, wait, you're in a car park that smells like piss and there's two homeless guys fighting. You're like, you know, this place needs a bit of time. Yeah, yeah, exactly. That's what it's like.

It's crazy. And not only that, it's one that everyone can't wait to fucking get into. It's like you see the line and you go, oh, they're all lining up to pay their tickets. It's like, no, they're lining up for a green curry. So when you say the restaurant's in the car park, during the week is the restaurant not there and people are parking their cars there?

It's like left hand, like where you go to pay for tickets and the elevator. Oh, yeah, no, down the laneway. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know the one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So now. It's full all the time. It's full all the time. On the way to the Melbourne Club.

That's where you saw it. But that to me Is kind of a cool Melbourne spot Sure But it's I just find it so Funny and weird I'd love to know

The origin of it Of like how this car park Just had this like Room in it Cause there's no way Dave do you want to Set up a restaurant in here There's no way

That used to be I wonder what their rent Is whether they divide Like alright we can get Five cars in here So that's 714 Yeah yeah yeah 35 bucks a day

Yeah yeah yeah They gotta pay the meter a day. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They've got to pay the meter each day. I mean, I haven't been in there. You have, Tommy. Yeah. Is there like yellow lines in there or anything? Has it been like lined up for car parking? Should they be paying for six cars in there or seven cars as rent?

In the interest of comedy, yes. Okay, good. Good, I knew it. It took too long eating. I had to pay an extra $30. That's common. When you, Carol Chandler, go into a Thai restaurant, do you just as a full whitey try and impress everyone with a little bit of Thai?

Do you punch out a couple of sentences? I do do the hello and goodbye and thank you. And they love it. They love it. They love it. They love it, folks. Yeah. They love it. They love it. They love it. They love it, folks. Yeah.

They love it. A 50-year-old white pasty man who's speaking Thai, they're like, yeah, we know what atrocities you've done in our country. But what's better, just doing that or just going, fuck it, you got any lemon chicken in here or what? Oh, just a hello. Hello, goodbye, thank you, it's fine. Yeah, you don't have to swear at him about lemon chicken. My son started, because a lot of people say, cup and cup, right? Is that the, thank you, it's fine. You don't have to swear at him about lemon chicken. My son started, because a lot of people say cup and cup, right?

Is that the, thank you very much. My son started saying it in Thailand because we were there for 10 days and they enjoyed him saying it. Did you get daily updates or messages from Chandler while you were there? We did a couple of text messages. Not every day. At least half the days. Yeah.

Go to this place. Fuck. And it was good. One day he messaged me and I was on a canal boat tour in Bangkok, which I've done before and which I love, those canal boats, because you just get a bunch of beers and you just cruise around these canals. And the sightseeing is actually really good. And he messaged me then, so i was able to send a

photo on a boat drinking beer out of a long neck pretty much as well yeah which was great well these i'll get into that but um so that that's the that's that's one of the type restaurants that sells out yep there's a heap of them that are selling out they finally um hit their limit there's a new one uh and no one is going into it. The breaking point. It's the new like burgers or like pizza or whatever. Donuts. Too many donuts.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. They've hit the breaking point. There's another fucking shit bagel joint. Yeah, bagels were the one for a bit. Yeah, yeah. So they finally hit their limit in Bourke Street and so that's the one I don't have to line up for. So that's the one I go to.

But we've talked about this and this is probably a commonly noticed thing. When you've got a Thai restaurant, there's a good chance to put a pun in there because you've got Thai in there. Yes. So you can go bow-Thai. Bow-Thai, yeah. Thai-tanic.

Yes. Thai me kangaroo downspout. Yes. Which was one in Sydney. Yeah, there was... Gary Eck used to have a very funny routine where he went through all of the... All the puns. All the ones in Sydney, and then he added a few extras

yeah right well this one this one maybe I notice you're not too keen to repeat I can't I can't remember what he

let's just say the 90s was a golden era once again I can't remember what his extra ones were but I remember it being very

it was a funny it was a good strong routine very funny I wish you'd remember instead of just saying that but I remember Titanic

timey kangaroo down sport. Yeah. There's one timey up. Typhoid? Timey up? I don't know about that. I know, but it is. It is a thing.

That's a bit fucking horny, isn't it? I've seen it a couple of times. Remember the Titans? Oh, yeah. Nice. Nice. Thai sexual? Is that something?

What? I don't know. No. Carl's just planning names for his Thai restaurant. Yeah thai restaurant yeah yeah but i love this one so this one is quite a clever play on words okay this one is thai space land i've seen that yeah i like it thailand it's good it's like a theme park It's like a theme park that's themed around Thailand. I like it. I've seen that.

The land of Thai. Yeah, I'm into it. Thailand land. The one, well, there's two close to mine, but one that's just clearly given up is called Ladyboy Thai. Yeah, that's good. Yeah. But is that lazier than Thailand?

I love Thailand. Thailand. Thailand's funny. It's very 2023. That's a good name. It's so dumb. It's very 2023 That's a good name It's so dumb It's great That's a good name

It is the one I am going to What's it Yeah well it's your favourite restaurant What's it like Is it good It's okay Well I'll put it this way The reason I like it

Is because I can get in there They've also got a big sign At the front that says We do $6 Changs And $6 Singers That's alright Stubbies That's excellent

Yep And so And now They've now got a deal that they've now got on tap eight dollar pints of singer oh amazing oh yeah okay where where is this place this yeah this is all right fuck this non-drinking bullshit let's get back on it this is what car park's this in this is this is only like across the road from it yeah so i'm going there all the time i'm doing i'm pre-drinks i'm doing post drinks here i'm going there all

the time i went there the other day And I ordered And I've been there so many times now That the waiter behind the counter Said to me As I ordered another Like a pint of Singer Yeah yeah

Cup on cow There's your table Yeah yeah Stop patronising us He goes Have you ever Eaten here? And I'm like

No He just knows me From going And I'm like, no. He just knows me from going there. I'm just drinking in there now. I'm treating it as my local. Fuck, that's insane. So I'm off the beers. You've now turned into an alcoholic.

What's going on? Everything's flipping. Limo's going to take up gaming soon. Those rare points in your life where you just have a beer in a restaurant. You just, for whatever reason, it's like, oh, well, La Poquette is all that's open. We've eaten, Where you just have a beer In a restaurant Yeah You just for whatever reason It's like oh well La Poquette is all that's open Yeah

We've eaten But we feel like a beer Yes Alright just a VB Yeah At this table With a fucking bit of Butcher's paper

Yes I'm doing that on purpose now Fuck yeah Because they've got outdoor seating So I'm just sitting out the front Having a drink Yeah that's nice Must be nice

Yeah I feel like a beer now Yeah I'm off the beers as well, though. Except there's one caveat in mind. Here we go. If I'm having a meal out somewhere, I can have a wine with my meal. Now, because I remember seeing you start of 2021, February 2021,

and we were both trying to do Feb fast. Yes. And it was like the 8th of Feb, and you were like, God, it's been hard. I mean, I've given myself about five nights off. And then the next day we went into a lockdown, and you put a photo up, and you're like, oh, thank God, FebFast is over.

I'm like, I think you've had like maybe two days of not drinking in the month so far. It's like when I did that. I've never been very good at it. Dry July, like I was like, people were buying me gold passes. I was buying myself gold passes. Oh, someone bought me another one. It's like me on their Steve McRain has bought me another one.

Fitbusters are fucking tough because you feel like you need it after the holidays, but then it's like it's still summer. Stuff's happening. It's like, why do it to yourself? Well, I'm doing it to myself now. But you know what? I'm enjoying not drinking at home. Because I was drinking too much at home.

It's my favourite type of drinking when there's no one there. Everyone thinks it's sad. You're wrong. I just love it. Just at home, having a beer, listening to some music, or watching a film, having a whiskey. As long as you don't start crying, it's not sad. If you can just bottle it all in for long enough.

That's why I have the alcohol. It pushes my feelings down. Are you eating as well while you're doing this? Are you having like a bowl of chips or a pizza? When I'm boozing by myself? No, no, no. Eating's cheating, buddy.

He's got the calorie counter book out. Man, I don't want to go over my limit. Drinking 15 pure blonds. A packet of Doritos ruined my last six beers. I'll get fat. Yeah, yeah. You know what? I'm watching my waist, guys.

I'm in a bad habit of like, I'll go and run my gig at Basement Comedy Club on Friday, Saturday. And because I'm like sitting there and I have to watch comedy for two hours, I'm like, this is boring. I need to drink. That's a nice review of me emceeing last weekend.

Thank you. No. But, well, that's the thing. That's what I was about to say, is that's a nice review of me i'm saying last weekend thank you no but well that's the thing well that's what i was about to say is that i do that all the time and then i was like no you know what and then you came last weekend and you were i'm saying and i thought you know what no one else is drinking blakey's not drinking i'm i'm not going to drink this weekend i'm not going to drink so but because like like you you've got the non-alcohol beer i'm sitting there going oh i need something in my hand. I need to drink or something. So the whole time I'm like going, oh, I'll grab another Coke.

And they just kept serving me Cokes. I had eight pints of Coke on Saturday night. I don't reckon I've been that hungover before on a Sunday. This is a lesson you learn when you're 18 and you're the designated driver at the club with your mates and you're just like pounding the Red Bulls to stay awake and then waking up the next day and being like, I can't, I actually can't remember anything. I was so jacked up on sugar.

I think it was worse for me. Yes, I felt, I don't reckon I've had as bad a hangover as that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Eight pints of Coke, I was fucking shit out on Sunday.

Yeah, had a rough one last night, boys. They gave me two 1.25 litre of Cokes with my pizza. I am far. A 46-year-old man at work behaving the same as an 8-year-old unsupervised at a birthday party. Just getting up at 11 and grabbing a Pepsi and going, here are the dog boys.

Just get back on it. Normally I'd rinse you for that, but I'm currently softer and drinking Heineken Zero. Didn't have any beers, but I was hitting the fairy bread pretty hard at the basement last night. That is a big night out. I know. I toned it down at the end. I got a few zeros, a few Coke zeros. Oh, yeah.

Stay on the Coke zeros. Surely, I mean, they give you cancer, but at least they don't make you fat. Yeah. Did you drive after drinking all those Cokes? I did. He flew home, mate. Whacked her into third. I did actually walk all the way home, so yeah.

He ran home like Jason Bourne Just through the streets Did you? You walked home? No I did walk home Yeah I walked home with you And then they kept going

Yeah He was blind He can't remember Oh you were off the piss No he was off He was off He had 35 zeros I stopped and got an ice cream

And you got a pie or something Yeah Couple of fat boys Yeah Living large Yeah So how long are you Off the booze for, Limo? What are you trying to make it to?

Until the end of April, that's my goal at this stage. All right. But I'm liking it because I'd sit at home and I started to think it was a bit sad. I'd drink a bottle of red. And on big nights I'd have a bottle of red and some nights a full block of fruit and nut chocolate and i just sit there find a tv show you really are over 50 aren't you

oh yeah fruit and nut oh what about this mate the uh the old gold rum and raisin i was gonna say oh yes i was shitting on it but i have fruit and nut and the rum and raisin and old gold. Oh, yeah. That block of club is not going to know what hit it when I get home. I know. I know. I'm into the dark chocolate now. That's worse than getting the prostate test. It's like, you're old. That ain't your role.

It's real like kind of like Manchurian Candidate almost, where it's like you try it when you're like a teenager and you go, this is fucking disgusting. And then just like, you just get activated. You just get activated. And I'll be like, dark chocolate's actually awesome. It's the yummiest kind. And then you just get activated. You just get activated. And I'll be like, dark chocolate's actually awesome. It's the yummiest kind. I've always loved dark chocolate, even as a kid. Really?

I would always go to, because mum always had, well, surprise, surprise, two kids with ADHD. We weren't allowed chocolate in the house. But mum only had cooking chocolate, which is the real dark stuff. And that's what we used to try and smoke. Oh, yeah, pounding that cooking chocolate. That's what I was used to. Just that and Laxettes.

And that and mum we used to try and smell. Oh, yeah, pounding that cooking chocolate. That's what I was used to. Just that and Laxettes. And that and Mum's cooking brandy. Right. So, yeah, I just made that switch without even from fruit and nut, Cadbury's fruit and nut, to the Old Gold. I didn't even realise. I think one day I got home and I was like, oh. Man, you know what kills me is that they did the, you know, you've got the Old Gold.

Remember when Cadbury did a mix of milk chocolate and dark chocolate? It was the fucking best. And it broke my heart because I discontinued it because it was only me buying it. Right. You know what my sign of aging is? Not even a snack, but just like orally consuming. I'm smashing the Gaviscones. I can't get through.

I don't think I get through 48 hours without eating a fucking Gaviscon. As soon as you start abusing, you know, as you do, you know, Thailand was a great example. You've got to fucking, and going into those mini-marts going, stomachs burning, what the fuck do I get? Everything fucks me up. Just musely fucks me. It's like, all right, time for another Gaviscon.

What was going on? So let's get into this. So you and I went to Thailand together a couple of months ago. We didn't talk about it properly on this show yet, but it was a boys' trip. Some stories were told about me with other guests but that's okay i don't think i mentioned any names okay well if you're saying that that was you in those stories that's up to you no no no no no no no i mean yeah it was but i mean who else on the trip was that on was doing that you know who else was smart enough to try and smuggle drugs out of a country in his mouth?

Did not mention any names on that episode. If you want to out yourself as that, then go for it. Well, I didn't technically do it, so it doesn't matter. I did something very stupid, Limo. What did you do? Because in Thailand,

edibles are legal now. Like marijuana is legal. Right, yeah, yeah. I saw the stools everywhere. It kind of made me wish I was in the pot. Yeah. In fact, to the point where I was like, well, I should give it a go. It's legal. Right, yeah, yeah. I saw the stools everywhere. It kind of made me wish I was into pot. Yeah. In fact, to the point where I was like, well, I should give it a go.

It's ridiculous. Have a crack. Yeah. But I was with my six-year-old son, so I didn't. Well, it makes that time more enjoyable. Yeah, yeah. But there was a lot of edibles going and stuff and joints and stuff.

It's legal now. So I was like, fine, I guess I'll give in to this as well. And I was taking a lot of edibles and stuff when I was away. I was having a great time, loving it. Of course. And then one of the guys in the group on our way out goes, oh, look, these lollies, these edibles, they're really hard and they take ages to dissolve.

But I kind of want an edible for the flight back. So we should just put them in our mouths when we get through customs. And they won't dissolve in time because they're hard lollies. And by the time we get to the lounge, then in the lounge, we can eat them before we get onto the plane. Right. Have a great plane ride. Go to sleep.

Sure. Lovely. That feels okay. Yeah, good. Good. Well, I don't know. Putting something in your mouth to get through customs sounds weird to me, but go on.

So I had them, like I already, here's where the problem was. It was me because I already had more, I was only having like a fourth of this edible. Right. And going onto the plane, I had like a whole one already just so it would keep me going for the eight hours. But then I put two more whole ones. Real technical maths involved.

Yes, Dr Blake, how many more? And what I want is to feel fucked for an entire flight when I'm trapped on the plane. Well, yeah. So I put two more in my mouth to try and get through customs. You're like a little squirrel. Yeah, I am like a little squirrel. More like a little mule, but go on. But technically, you're not smuggling it out because I consumed it before.

Why did you hide it in your mouth then if you're not smuggling it in? I don't know, Carl. I don't make the greatest decisions. Have a fucking look at me, all right? Anyway, you weren't even a part of the panic attack that was going on afterwards, but the, the customs line took so fucking long to get through. But there was another guy unnamed who was doing the same thing.

Right. And I looked at him going, man, why don't fucking dissolving? And we've been in this line for half an hour. And he goes, Oh, I spat mine out half an hour.

And I was like, like oh because both of them have dissolved in my mouth and he's like oh okay and then all of a sudden i just started smiling going god that's funny and i don't know why and then we get into the lounge And I was like Oh this is This is not bad And then I'm like I'm happy And I'm It's all kicking on But I've done

I've done drugs before And where I was at That quick Like most edibles Take two hours to kick in And this was at the 30 minute mark And I was at

Base camp of Everest And I was I was in a bad spot already. We were all sitting together in this place and I literally went, fuck, let's look for Blakey. I haven't seen him for half an hour. And then someone went,

he's sitting next to you. And I looked at him and he's just like, I'm like, I have not heard from you for a long time. I thought he was gone. You turned around to roast me about something and you and your mate were saying something to me and i just remember looking at you both going not now not now please and then i was like i found like i oh man i i had a full

like i was freaking out like i was greening out i've only greened out twice before and i was like oh fuck we're in the storm now And there's another Two hours of this left So I went and had Like a shower in the lounge I was trying to Fucking sober up

And then I thought In my head Does the shower Get rid of the system No No it doesn't If anything The lights go out

And you have another Panic attack In the shower room Did you rub any of the Edibles into your hair Because maybe it could Have worked that way I don't know

I don't know I was in such a bad spot because i've since then figured out if you have too many edibles and thc it turns into a psychedelic which fucking means what i was going for it makes a bit sad i thought i was going to end up on banged up abroad because i was like i've got to call an ambulance because this is too much for me to even deal with but i was like then i'm going to end up in a Thai jail and the whole time i was like i should have taken kickboxing classes like my dad told me if i knew Mu Thai i'd be safe in jail and i was like freaking out in the shower but i i managed to get like i spoke to one of your mates and i and he's like man how are you going because he he knew the wave i was on and i was like i don't think I can get on a plane. And he's like, you're getting on the fucking plane.

And I was like, okay. And I got onto the plane and I watched Finding Nemo and it gave me another panic attack. And then I went to sleep. Yeah, right. Because I walked past you. Because that was the thing. It was you panicking about getting on the plane.

It was too much. And then when I, you were sitting separately to us and I had to walk past you to get on the plane. And I walked past you and I saw you and I went, are you okay now? And you were like, yes. I've never been happier to get onto that plane. So did he – could you tell looking at him that he wasn't right?

Yeah, like he didn't talk for an hour. That's not Brett Blake. Yeah, yeah. And you know what the sign was that I was fucked? Because the lounge had free piss, and I didn't touch a drop. So you know what the sign was that I was fucked? Because the lounge had free piss and I didn't touch a drop. Yeah. So you know I was munted. Years ago, back to the 90s, again, when I was living in London, a few of us went to Amsterdam for a weekend.

None of us had ever had cake before. Oh, God. The space cake. Space cake, right? And we're leaving. It's a Monday and we're leaving. So we go, well, let's go down to a cafe and have some. We can't come to Amsterdam and The space cake. Space cake, right? And we're leaving. It's a Monday and we're leaving. So we go, well, let's go down to a cafe and have some. We can't come to Amsterdam and not have cake.

So we all go. We get a cake and we have a slice each and we eat it. Total rookie mistake. We wait like five minutes and go, that hasn't done anything. Let's get another one. So we get another one. We cut that up, eat it. And then five minutes later we go, that's a fucking ripoff.

We go back to our hostel, get our backpacks, get on the train. And we literally five minutes from arriving at the airport and we all just go, fuck. Yeah. We were like, and we were like, there was five of us, right? We're like, let's stick together. Because this is freaking us out. But I would love to have seen what we're like let's stick together because this is freaking us out but i would love to have

seen what we looked like because i reckon we were all huddled together yeah in this little group yes to support each other it's fine when you're in a group but when you're riding solo in that headspace and no one else around you is they're just like what's going on blakey i'm like not now yeah so we i was looking it took me like sorry after after i got home and went to bed like two days later i was still fucked like it was it was it was the dumbest thing i've ever done and that is a fucking big call it's such a big call honestly that was the hardest mental thing i've ever gotten through and it's changed me it's honestly changed me internally and i gotten through. And it's changed me. It's honestly changed me internally.

And I don't know if it's for the good or bad. Are you still on the pot? Yeah. I mean, I'm not drinking. I'm not fucking. I'm just microdosing now. I'll tell you what I loved about Thailand. You can go into a chemist and buy Ritalin.

I did not know that. They've stopped selling fucking Valium. I'll give you the hot tip. Oh, no, we bought Valium as well. Nah, it's not Valium. Isn't it? No. Well, here's the thing.

I think you guys did buy it because you were in Phuket. We were going around in Bangkok. Then we went into a small other town. I was on the look the whole time. I was going to a chemist and going, Valium or the other chemical name for it. And they're like, no, no, no. But there was a couple of them where it was like, I went to so many. I looked like a fucking junkie.

I went into one and they were like, no, we don't have that, but we have this. And I'm like, oh, great. Obviously, you're offering this to me because it's the next best thing. And then I went to pay for it and it was like a different price than normal. I said, is this anything like Valium?

And they go, absolutely not. I'm like, well, what are you selling this to me for? And they go... You look down, it's a pack of the jelly beans. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hang on a minute. No, they go... He's got an erection for nine days.

Yeah. Great. Thanks, guys. I'm never getting to sleep. Guys, this guy really loves Thailand. I go, well, what are you selling go, well, what's this for then? They go, depression and diarrhea. I'm like, that's not what I'm after.

They look at you and go, yes, it is. What a combo for one tablet, the cure. Absolutely. Depression and diarrhea. Maybe you're depressed because of the diarrhea. Start in the order that it's killing you. Also, every time you tell stories now about Valium and stuff on the podcast, I feel like I've created a monster.

I know. Because I was the first person in time going, brother, let's go to the campus. You're like, what? I was like, man, you can get legal speed in there. It's fucking sick. And then I nearly had a heart attack in front of Tommy at the gym. It was pretty cool. Yeah, that's right.

I was like, brother, I'm not going well. I took legal speed. I'm sorry. Yeah, you come sauntering into the gym and you're like, we can work out together if you want, but I'm doing the rocks workout, so you might not be able to keep up. And then five minutes later you're like, I need to sit down. I've got to get out of here.

I was yakking in the shower. I was like, oh, God. My heart rate was like 210 or something like that. I was like, man, maybe it wasn't a good idea working out. But then I was like, man, Carl, you get so many free Valium. You're like, what does Valium do? I was like, dude, just have one or two good idea working out. But then I was like, man, Carl, you get so many free Valium. You're like, what does Valium do? I was like, dude, just have one or two beers and you'll fucking be in a good space. And then you're like, man, it's sick.

I'm like, I told you. Yeah, yeah. So all of a sudden now I'm walking around Thailand knocking on doors going, can I have Valium? They're like, this is a McDonald's. So that's what happened. So I went in and I was going to all these places. I couldn't get it anywhere. We got the big tip that you can't buy them over the counter't buy them over the county you're gonna have a prescription now i'm

like what is this country coming to what a nanny state thailand is these days so uh there was a couple times where like i said i was going and going can i have alim they're like no but you can have this and it's like is this just like the end of stock and you're just getting rid of fucking anything because it was sort of like walking in asking for a hot dog and they're going no but you can have roast beef it's like it's not the fucking yeah is it if you got too much roast beef so one of those pills guys is it normal for a male to get their period so i am bleeding they were giving me whatever they had and then finally i go in and i go valium and they go yes and i go actual valium I go, okay, great. Hit me. And so then they go, great.

And this guy gets a fucking bucket out and then starts pouring into a plastic bag. And I'm like, well, he's got like a white smock on. He must know what he's doing. I'm getting a goldfish here apparently. Yeah. He's pouring a powder? Huh? He's pouring like a powder.

No, no, no, no, no. Like a bucket of pills. A bucket of pills. And he's pouring into a plastic bag. And I'm no, no, no. Like a bucket of pills. A bucket of pills. And he's pouring it into a plastic bag. Right. And I'm like, okay, well, you know, what do I know? Like, he must know better. He's in a chemist shop.

He's got white clothes on. He knows what he's doing. A chemist slash place that sells toasties, 7-Eleven. You know what I mean? A chemist never look right. It's actually a Thai restaurant. Yeah, yeah. So I'm like, okay, like, what do you say?

Like, you know better than me. So I'm like, okay, it's a different price. He's like okay like what do you say what like you know better than me so i'm like okay it's a different price he's like how many do you want and i'm like well usually coming in packs at 10 don't they he's like yeah but whatever you want i'm like all right just give me a free pour or whatever so he just pulls me a big sack of it i'll say when yeah yeah so then i get him and i'm like showing you guys i'm like look at this and it's cheaper than normal and and you guys like that's a different color than normal as well. And that's a different shape. I was like, dude, that's not Valium.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. They're yellow. No, that's not what you said. You said, can I have some? And so I gave them to you. Oh, yeah, yeah. Now it's coming back to me. Sorry, I told you the weed changed me.

My memory. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So then I pass them on to you. And then I immediately go home and take them and go, great, I'm going to have a... Because I think we'd had a big night the night before. I'm like, great, I'm just going to knock myself out for 14 hours. This is going to be great. That did not knock me out.

That did the opposite of knock me out. That kept me up all night and I was distinctly having very vivid conversations with myself of, what if I lived on Mount Everest? Could I still do comedy and live on a mountain? I was in a waking coma all night just going, fucking, what if I had electricity going through me? I was having the fucking most insane hypothetical.

It sounds like what you were going through, what I was going through on the plane. Yes. Oh, my God. What happens if I jump out of this fucking thing now? Yes. What did you conclude with the Mount Everest thing? Because the commute would make it tougher.

I know. No, no. I was thinking about, would I have Wi-Fi up there? Would I be able to email people? Would I be able to Facebook people during the gig to make sure the gig's going okay? All that sort of stuff. Were you at base camp or were you lower down the mountain? I was imagining that I was quite high up.

Because why would you go all the way there and then hang at a base camp? Fuck your whole life up. I love that you're on one of the world's most beautiful mountains and you're like, oh, I hope these five cunts do okay in my chicky gig in Melbourne or whatever. You know what I mean? Just going, oh, fuck, old sticky feet thorn nose on again, is he? Just roasting people. Yeah, it was a fucking brutal.

Yeah, well, that was my plane trip. That was me for fucking 10 hours in our hotel room just going fucking bananas on whatever the fuck... You still don't know what they were? No, they could have been the diarrhoea depression pills. I don't know. Yeah, someone might. Yeah, I'm sure someone will know.

That'll trigger something. Were you boozy as well? No. Not that bad. Okay. Not that bad. Sometimes that fucking triggers it all. That fucks a lot of things

with some of the sleeping pills that they might have given you if you stay up past like if you drink on them and you stay past that point where you feel like you've got to go to bed

yes then you can have a really interesting time well that was when which you won't remember yeah no well totally that's what we I mean you said

you turned me on to the Valiums and drinking it was more Adam Rosenbach's when we were in Costa Mili together me on to the Valiums and drinking. It was more Adam Rosenbach's. When we were in Costa Mili together, we were doing Valiums and drinking. And he was like, yeah, this is the best thing. You do this. And then in the morning, I would be like, how did we get home?

And he'd be going, I have no idea. So we were like, this is great. But we're not remembering how we're getting home. And one morning, I was like, I don't know how I got home. And also I'm missing $500 in Australian. So fuck those. Yeah, that's not ideal. Insane that you'd put this out publicly.

Just crazy. How the fuck would I have lost $500? Yeah, I wonder. Are you? How? No. What possible things? Yeah, in Thailand.

Survey says No Man I lost $500 And had lipstick on my neck It was crazy That's not That's not what it was It just fell out of my pocket

By the way I do not condone taking drugs But they are fun Yes Yeah yeah That was No it was not It was

I remember the last point of the night It was quite late at night I was going down a dark street Towards the hotel You were not I saw a was quite late at night, I was going down a dark street towards the hotel. I saw a red light, I walked in there. Why are you saying this into a microphone? So you lost 500 bucks down a dark street? Yeah.

I wonder what happened. They don't know. Look, for people that have been to Koh Samui, to the Ozo, it was only about a kilometre away from the Ozo. There's nothing down that end. I don't know how the fuck I lost it. $500 is gone. There's nothing to spend it on.

You can't spend $500 even doing that stuff, can you? I don't know. You're the one telling the story, Garth. Just remind the jury, Mr Chandler. If you're a generous tipper. You have no recollection of what you did. Yeah, I don't. Okay.

Insert activity here. I don't know what I did, but it definitely was not did. Yes. Yeah, I don't. Okay. Insert activity here. I don't know what I did, but it definitely was not that. Yes, yes. I have absolutely no recollections whatsoever. I flaked out and lost $500 and have no recollection of anything that I can give them.

Nor do I have any kind of reason of what it could be. Exactly. I think that's a good argument. I do know that it's not that. But I'd remember that. That's what I would remember. I'd remember that. I would remember, yeah. I remember that's a good argument. I do know that it's not that. But I'd remember that. That's what I would remember. I'd remember that.

I would remember, yeah. I remember it wasn't something, but I don't remember anything else. I distinctly remember waking up and my balls being still full. Yes. So it can't possibly have been that. With a raging hard-on, the same hard-on I had the night before. Well, that could have been from the yellow pills. It did have cum in my hair.

Every time we tell a story, it's like, no wonder they fucking hate when Westerners come over. It's like, yeah, we went over there. We're trying to get value. And then I lost $500 down an alley. I try to smuggle drugs out of my mouth like a fucking idiot. I went into a chemist in Phuket and asked for Ritalin. Because not everyone does it. So the pharmacist...

So what's the consequences of if you were to take that? Ritalin is like... Ritalin and dexamphetamine are like legal speed. So they just ramp you up. To be honest, when I took it, I didn't really feel anything.

I didn't feel a buzz or anything. Maybe you have ADHD. Did you sit down and read a book or something? I did a crossword for some years. That's the true rather than waiting six months to get the telehealth appointment to find out if you've got ADHD. Buy a cheap ticket to Phuket, go to the chemist, get yourself some Ritalin, take it, oh, it's done nothing.

Well, case closed. Back home I go. But I did find myself all of a sudden drinking my 18th beer. Right. I don't know. I've grown an extra leg when it comes to drinking beers. It didn't mean nothing, but I've burned off 13 people's ears about my shit investment ideas.

Yeah, yeah. Who wants to start a food truck? Guys, I'm into crypto. Have you heard this one? I think Ethereum's the way to go. If you don't do that, you're a fucking idiot, all right? It's called blockchains. If you don't know about blockchains, you're a fucking idiot.

So do you bring any of that stuff back with you? No. But when I went to buy it, there's one place where they didn't sell it. I asked for Ritalin, and the pharmacist just looked at me. She didn't shake her head, but I could tell internally she was shaking her head, just going, fuck off, mate. I know what your deal is. Look, to be honest, when a Westerner walks in, it's either my land or all that.

You know what I mean? It's nothing, you know what I mean? Well, that's it. So what were you, now that was the thing that you were guzzling non-stop. You and the other guys, every time we went for a walk you'd stop at a 7-Eleven. My dream. Bacari sweat. Oh yeah, I love Bacari sweat.

Yeah, Mr. Dassler loves it as well. We love it. It's the best drink ever. It's what, full of electrolytes? It's electrolyte water. If you have one before you go to bed because you sweat a lot, so it's like salt. It's like saline drips that go into your fucking veins that hydrate you.

It's kind of like the same shit, but you drink it. If you have one in the morning and one at night, you're pretty much good to go. Right. The only time I've engaged in going to the chemist in Thailand and buying stuff without a prescription, because I take blood pressure medication, and one time when we were there, I just had forgotten to bring it with me i'm like fuck

this is pretty bad like i really need to take it i texted my mate who's a doctor and i was like hey man can you can i can you like is there a way of you like sending me a prescription or something for this over and he's like brother you're in thailand just go into the chemist with the fuck i'm like oh yeah and so he like, sends me the name of it. And I just go in there like, can I have this? And they're like, yeah. They just, I'm like, oh, I may as well just stock up on it while I'm here.

So I don't have to fuck around with it at home. Like what a fucking nerd. We just gave a full bag of it to this other Aussie guy. We're out of Valium. Maybe that's it. It slowed your, yeah, slowed your heart rate. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. I should have, well, no, I didn't bring any of that home. I love how your heart rate right down. Yeah. I should have... Well, no, I didn't bring any of that home. I love how they're like, no Valium, but weed is legal now, guys. You know what I mean? Only like two years ago, they were shooting people. Yeah. And now they're like, we're back on board with it.

It's okay. We can make money off it. That's good. They're a weed thing. You would have seen them in Bangkok, in Phuket. They're everywhere. Dispensaries are everywhere. They've got joints. They tell you the milligrams. It's all fucking calculated. It's good. They're a wee thing. You would have seen them in Bangkok, in Phuket. They're everywhere. Dispensaries are everywhere. They've got joints.

They tell you the milligrams. It's all fucking calculated. It's great. And down the beach, they're even selling joints down at a little bar on the beach. You could buy a can of beer and a bloody joint. It's on menus. My friend was working in Singapore recently

and they had two days off and he went over to, they went to Thailand for two days and he just hits the dispensaries flat out. So they're for like, yeah, 48 hours and then comes back and he's over to they went to thailand for two days and he just hits the dispensaries flat out it's there for like yet 48 hours and then comes back and he's telling someone in singapore oh yeah i did this pretty great and they're like brother they are testing people at random off planes who've come in from thailand and you're going in the clink if you've got it in your system coming in from somewhere else system apparently they can test your system, can they? They can do whatever they want. That was my, that's like, a lot of people go,

Brett, that's pretty dumb trying to smuggle drugs out of Thailand. I was going to consume on the plane, so technically, international waters, go fuck yourself. But my joke, my thing was like, if I was to get caught, I was just going to swallow and go, it's in the system, boys. It doesn't count. It does not count. It does not count. It does not count.

Right. Fuck. The joke was on me because the mental fight I had to go through after that. Just Brett sweating, just like fucking having the – like just seeing visions on the plane and just muttering to himself, well, it turns out the joke is on me. Man, I was having a rough time. I don't even want to think about it.

It gives me trauma. All right. Well, we better wrap it up. Limo, I believe you've got to hit the trail. You've got a cricket game to get to. I've got to hit the trail. Well, it's a dinner date with my wife and my son. Oh, nice.

We're going out to dinner. Good get. Love it. Very excited. Go to that Thai place. Yeah, go to Thai land. In the car park. Yeah.

Yeah, it's a little far from home. Like that's nearly a kilometre away. Hey, it's got good parking. True. We'll just drive straight in. All right, guys, thank you for joining us. Brett, Limo. Brett, you've got a tour coming up.

I do. I'm hitting Perth next week. I've got my show called Smoko King, and then Adelaide and Melbourne come up with Dog Act. Also, all three states, Perth, Melbourne, and Adelaide, me and Nick Capper have our beer tasting show called The Brew Dudes Froth Zone, so make sure you get around that.

Sick. And my Instagram. Oh, that's on your Instagram? Do you have a website or not? Yeah, but who looks at websites nowadays? Just jump on. Hit that link tree, baby. Yeah, link tree on at websites nowadays? Just jump on Get that Linktree baby. Linktree on

at Freddie Blake. You'd be laughing. Linktree. Yeah, it's socials. Hit me up on the socials. That's your plug?

Yeah. If you see him in the street, give me a limo. Give me a limo. Always fun. Really the highlight of any day.

Feels good. Even if you don't see him. Just yell it out. Let's start with the pandemic when it was like, let's all go out onto our balconies and applaud the nurses at 8.15. Everyone in Fitzroy, next Monday at 8pm, go out the front of your house and just yell,

Lino! All right, guys. Thanks very much for listening and we'll see you next time. See you, mates. And they've done it again They have done it again You're right Bernie's kicked a big one Bernie's abstained a big one

How do you go with a non-alcoholic beer? Abstained a big one Yeah Oh from drinking Yes Right Do people I guess

Yeah Abstain in my head It's linked with A rooting Right How do I go with That says a little bit More about you I guess, yeah, abstain in my head it's linked with a rooting. Right. How do I go with it? That says a little bit more about you than it does about me. How do I go with it?

Yeah. I like a heaps normal. Pretty good. You actually do drink it? Yeah, from time to time. Yeah, right. Every now and then. Yeah.

I might start doing it more, actually. I'm finding it very hard to break the habit of Just a can or two Midweek Really trying to cut that out of my life But So I thought Get some heaps normals in the fridge

You know If I'm tempted on a Wednesday Just have one of them But then a big part of why I want to cut it out Is just all the shit Not even the alcohol Just all the other fucking bad shit that's in it. And it's like,

well, that's all still in a heaps normal. So it's kind of the same problem, but maybe that can be my training wheel approach to weaning myself off it. What about yourself? I don't think I've ever had one. You see them. I got to say in terms of just rapid expansion,

that's got to be the biggest explosion of maybe like had never heard of it had never really seen or thought about non-alcoholic beer as a prospect yeah i kind of that one came out had a cool label all of a sudden you've seen it everywhere most pubs you're at now they've got a little non-alcoholic beer section i'd have to say i'd never thought about because i always thought why would i fucking do that i i i don't drink beer for the taste i don't mind it but it's to you know social lubricant and relaxing whatever it is but then i had a few mid-strengths the other day i'm like okay now i've got a little portal into it oh i love a midi yeah i never even do that i'm mad for a midi i never even do that yeah well i mean i drink quick so. I never even do that. Yeah, well, I mean, I drink quick.

So a midi is just a good way of keeping me. Like I took mid-strengths to Meredith and it fucking saved my life. Yeah. Because it's just, it's all day. Yeah. So if it's going to be a long sesh, I'd rather just settle in with the midis rather than have, yeah, four pints and be going home at 9.30. Yeah, I had three pints of mid-strength the other day

and got to the end of the third and just went, wow, I've just been drinking some weird sort of placebo. Like I'm three pints down and this is weird to be like not more altered than this. Yeah, it's the same with the non-alcoholics, right? It's like a big part of it is just that sort of psychosomatic, like I've had a stressful day, I'm sipping a beer and it's making me feel a little bit better. So it's not even necessarily about the alcohol that's in it.

It's just about tricking, you know, you're still getting that same kind of like, ah, okay, this is the end of a long day. Like I kind of, yeah, I mean it's good that there's good options now for that kind of thing. What mid-strength were you having? No idea. Okay. Yeah, just whatever they had at some pub.

You just went and asked for a mid-strength? No, I think we, I think it was just, I think it was the only lager maybe that I had on tap. So I'm like, okay, I guess I'm getting that. What pub? I'm determined to work out what this was. It was a pub in Mornington by the beach. So I don't know what the name of it was. Yeah, damn.

Yeah. So good luck, fuckhead. Get your fucking beer inspecting goggles on there. Oh, well, this was, you would have been driving, right? So that's part of the. No. Okay. No.

So there you go. You still can't figure it out. Yeah, yeah. I'm really thrown off the scent here. Wasn't driving. And no, just, it was purely, that was the best looking beer there. I was like, all right, I guess I'm really thrown off the scent here. Yeah, I wasn't driving. And no, it was purely that was the best looking beer there. I was like, all right, I guess I'll do this. Yeah, interesting.

All the others were like, I don't know. I'm a lager fan. I'm not really fucking too fussed about the rest of it. It's a bit hard to drink, I reckon, the rest of it. I'm going somewhere on Saturday that has 4X Gold on tap, which I was drinking at a wedding this time last year in Queensland. And I was just loving it.

I was like, you know, it's like you see that and you go, there's kind of, you know, an eastern states part of you that goes, oh, this is some fucking disgusting Queensland bullshit beer. Right. And then you drink it, you go, this is actually pretty nice. Is it better than our standards down south? Well, it's a mid-strength. Oh, right, okay.

It's a mid-strength and it's yummy. I get it. I get the hype. I'm a 4X Gold fan. Okay. So I'm going to be slurping them down on Saturday night. All right. I'll have a go.

We have – what are you going to drink in Adelaide, Tommy? Because we're going to Adelaide in March, March the 11th. Yeah, I like their mismatch brewery that they have over there, that they have at the Rhino Room. Okay. The mismatch Session Ale, I'm a bit of a fan of. That's a mid-strength. Okay.

Here's the next question for you, Ari Adelaide. Yeah. Where are you going to stay and have you got your airfares yet got my airfares yep uh i've gotta do my comm today actually you need to fucking get onto it because i did all my bullshit and went this is bad well i'm there for two weeks and a bit of that time is most likely going to be with my girlfriend so So I'm probably going to get an Airbnb, potentially slightly out of town. Yeah, well, I tried to get a hotel in the city and it is all gone. And what you can sort of get on that date is like $350.

Oh, yeah. It's just crazy. Like all the times, all the years we've been going to Adelaide, you can always get good value there. It's always like, oh, there's a good hotel in the city for $100 or something. It's like, those days are gone. And also, it is a long weekend, I believe, there. It is, yeah.

But I am staying... I was about to stay in the worst hotel I've ever stayed in, and then I fucking sat on it for like three hours and then it went too oh yeah so now I'm staying in a that's annoying

leaving the tab open and you're like I'll come back to this yep and then you just leave it that little bit too long yep and then

came back to it and then went fuck I guess I'm going with the next best option an RSL five kilometres out of the city great

that's that's where you're best option yes right that's where i'm staying yep fucking hell well yeah i mean because i'm going to be there for a bit and have yeah my partner with me i was just planning to be slightly out of town anyway get a little scooter get a little beam scooter right on into town each day there's worse things yeah unless i thought i thought you know what if it has to be a drunken late night Get a little beam scooter, ride on into town each day. There's worse things. Yeah, that's what I thought. I thought, you know what? If it has to be a drunken late night five kilometre walk back to the fucking pokies venue,

then that's what it's got to be. Well, I mean, the other thing is we're on at 2.30 in the afternoon. You could fly back that night if you really wanted to. Yeah, I guess I could. But it seems like a waste. It's always a nice little experience when we do our Adelaide show. And we do it in the middle of, coincidentally, in the middle of a festival mostly. And, you know, there's friends around. There's drinks to be had.

There's, you know, it's sort of the one exciting time to go to Adelaide. Why not make the most of it? Yeah, I mean, part of why I'm going to stay there a little longer is because that's in the period where I talked about it three weeks ago now where we're being kicked out of our house. So in my head, I'm like, I'm just living in Adelaide for two weeks. You know, I'm homeless here. So I'm just going to be an Adelaide citizen for two weeks.

And sure, some people might say that's too short of a time to say that you were living there. That's technically a holiday. But, you know, I didn't have a proper home in Melbourne to go to. So, you know, I'll have most of my stuff with me. Tell me where I live in Melbourne if I'm not living here. Exactly. I'm sort of staying in someone else's house currently in Melbourne.

That's not really living there. You're getting your passport stamped when you get to Adelaide? I'm a citizen of the world. I'm a troubadour. That's very impressive. So we're doing Adelaide. That's March 11, 2.30 p.m. in the afternoon. Come along or down.

Plenty of great guests on. Plenty of great content to be had. And then Melbourne. We're coming all the way over. Are you going to stay in a place there as well? longer down plenty of great guests on um plenty of great content to be had and then uh melbourne then it's we're coming all the way over you're going to stay in a place there as well well i hope i'm back in here by this point but knowing how these things go probably still be fucking homeless by that point oh well i'll i'll have to look at the hotel prices in melbourne i've always wanted to go there so it'll be good to go there and uh spend a couple of weeks doing shows there every saturday afternoon 4 30 april 1 8 15 and 22 melbourne can't wait to see your smiling happy faces there yeah

that's it in the front row just laughing it up yep mouths open ready to receive a hot stream of content into the gob yep at morris house to Tommy. At the newly anointed Morris House. Yep. The Morrow Bar, as I called it off air. Yes. Which they should just call it that. Yes. As I did want to lead you into.

I thought that was quite good. The Morrow Bar. Because I saw their press release thing about it where it was the original name of the building or some shit like that. And it's like, I mean, you could still riff on it. Call it the Morrow Bar. Yeah. That's still paying homage to the initial custodians of the building.

Why don't we rename where we do the podcast? So Basement Comedy Club is in the basement of Morris House, near European Beer Cafe. But we do the pod up on the second floor. Why don't we just unofficially rename that the Morrow Bar? We could just make a little section of the stage yeah and that's the morrow bar why don't we well actually you know we haven't done posters or anything for it yet yeah on the posters i'll put little dumb dumb club at the morrow bar

at morris house does this mean all this stuff i think we talked about this the other week everything promoting at the european at the morris House for a little while is going to have to be like venue, Morris House, brackets, FKA, European Beer Cafe. Maybe, yeah. I've talked to some people about it, but yeah, maybe. Right. Yeah, yeah. I mean, the key thing is you still get to say 120 Exhibition Street. That's true. Google Maps has 120 Exhibition Street that's true

Google Maps has changed everything it's like oh that's good yeah surely surely it's not that hard and also

it's also like when you're going formally known as European Beer Cafe a lot of people would be like what the fuck's that like that's that's why it's being changed

because no one knows that fucking pub anyway yeah that's very true and in like we've talked about in between the Belgian Beer Garden and the European the restaurant that happens to be just around the corner. Yes. Well, yeah, check all them out.

Morris House. And also, hey, check out my solo show, Adelaide and Melbourne. It's called Scam Artist. Adelaide's Feb 28 until March the 4th at the Rhino Room, and then Melbourne is something like March the 20th, March the 30th until April the 9th. So come and check that out if you're in those two hoods. You specifically, Carl. Me.

Please come every night. Bring your wife and have her need to vomit halfway through and walk out of the show. That is what happened once that was a long time ago but she was very ill within your show

within your show about cancer she she caught the very thought of it yes thank you to everyone

who supports the show via patreon.com slash little dumdum club yep or who supports us in any way via merch sales via I don't know you going and telling supports the show via patreon.com slash little dumb dumb club yep uh or who supports us in in any way uh via merch sales via i don't know you going and telling your friends about this show

and getting more listeners on board um through anyone anyone who out there who owns a business who wants to fucking sponsor us or something that would be cool as well uh any form of we'll take all of your money in any way you like. But in this instance, thank you to people on patreon.com slash littledominom.com. You can go through

that website, you can go through our website, but this is the part of the show where we, it's okay to just go thank you in general.

Let's get specific, Tommy. That's what comedy's all about, the specifics. Yep. And that's what this comedy's all about. The specifics. Yep. And that's what this comedy is all about.

We're going to thank X amount of people. And this is the comedy algebra that's going to happen today. By the end of the show, we'll know what X equals. Oh, wow. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. So we've just said we'll do X.

And then just when we feel like stopping, we stop and then we know. Then we know. That's how algebra happens. Oh, interesting. When we can be bothered doing something, that's how math works. Yeah, interesting. Yeah.

That's so much easier than how I got it explained to me at school. Maybe I would have done better at math. Yes. When it's impossible to fail. Yeah. Yes. Yeah. Well, thank you to everyone.

But in particular, thank you very much to these people. Thank you to Patreon subscriber number one for this week, first cab off the rank.

Thank you to Nathan Richardson. Nathan Richardson. Yeah. How does that track for you? Son of Richard. Son of Dick.

Son of Dick. What about Nathan? Don't mind the name Nathan. Really? Yeah, don't mind it. Really? I'm not for it.

I don't know. I've just got positive association to it. I like Nathan Fielder. The band Waves, the main singer from that. They're all recent references. Surely you must have something in your gut from years ago where you've met a Nathan Young and gone... Never had one at school.

Never met a Nathan. Nah, never met a Nathan. Nathan's just a... To me, it's just a dork name. Yeah, that's interesting. And also the name of a guy at school that... Well, here we go. Yeah.

More importantly. Yes. That stuck his dick in a tree once. Really? Yep. That's cool. Yep. The weird thing is...

And then why do you have the negative association to it? Because I was the tree. Oh, right, right, right. Yeah, yeah. This was the weird one. There was a story. You know those great school stories

where it's like, oh, did you hear about this person who did this? And you go, okay, great. That sounds unbelievable, but okay, I'm a kid i'll believe it but you and you're like and then you look back and go how the fuck did that happen how would that have been a thing that happened this was a story about this this guy he goes uh that a bunch of fucking guys were like yeah we heard you fucked a tree or something and he's like no no they're like we're gonna make you

fuck another tree if you like it so much and then they like made him fuck a tree but how do you make anyone fuck a tree yeah how do you how do you make someone get did they suck him off until he was hard and then jam that into a tree how do you how do you do that i feel like i feel like i'm having the most intense deja vu of my life I've ever had before. Really? I swear I've heard this on the pod before. Probably, yeah. Specifically you saying, how do you make someone fuck a tree?

Do you suck them off until they get hard? I know I've heard that exact phrase verbatim. And it's not like, I don't think I'm, I rarely back myself, but I don't think I'm mistaken here. It's so specific that there's no way I'm conflating that with something else. This is how it works to me. Like you have X amount of stories from school, then I'm out and about. I'm living my life. I'm trying to get new stories.

There's a limit. I could have driven today. I didn't. It's an absolute cunt of a day of weather. And I went, you know what? I'm going to walk. I'm going to pee. Just in't. It's an absolute cunt of a day of weather. And I went, you know what? I'm going to walk. I'm going to pee. Just in case.

Something's going to happen. Maybe the tram crashes and someone dies and I've got something to talk about. However, nothing happened. So now I'm going back to the time someone fucked a tree. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, it's like we say, you know, it's such a bad habit to be in because it doesn't, like, no one cares. But starting an anecdote by going, I'm sure I've told this on the show before. Because it's like, well, you're about to just tell it again anyway.

It's not stopping you from anything. The idea that this is in some way a consolation to the person who doesn't want to hear it again at home. It's like, oh, well, at least he's aware of it. But you know what it does stop? Me finishing the story and then you going, I fucking heard you say this. That's true. No, but it was more just like, I wasn't having a go at you for saying it. It was more just like I had this just intense.

Sure. Because at the start of it, I didn't think I'd heard it before. But there was just something about this specific phrasing. It's not only have I heard the story before, I've been subjected to the very intense visual imagery of someone sucking a person off next to a tree so that they can force them to put their dick in it. That's the bit that rankled me is being back in that space, just picturing that in my mind's eye. I like the idea that like, because sometimes I'll talk about this stuff and you go right what if it gets back to people and mostly on this show i have to just go i'll just deal these consequences once i get to it yeah i'm gonna tell some bad story about someone and if they complain they get angry so be it yeah but imagine having to get over that and

going right i've heard that and it's like oh that guy fucking told that story about me on the pod i heard about and then it's like then you hear that guy fucking told that story about me on the pod, I heard about it, blah, blah, blah. And then it's like, then you hear it again, you're like, now this horrible thing that happened to me is just fucking hack. Oh, I see what you're saying. It's just boring. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're boring people with it now.

Yeah, yeah. It was shocking to start with, and it made me upset that you've talked about it, and now it's like, oh, mate, come on. I've done heaps of other fucked in the head stuff. You can talk about that. Whereas you're going, like, once it's like, oh, mate, come on. I've done heaps of other fucked in the head stuff. You can talk about that, can't you? Whereas you're going like, once it's out there, then, you know, I'm already in trouble.

I may as well retell it. Right, right, right. This person's angry at me. I may as well just tell it every week. Yeah, that's not a bad idea. Just to really make sure that it was worth getting in trouble for. That's not a bad idea. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. All right, well, thanks, Nathan. Thanks, Nathan. And I hope you and that tree are still together. It's not the same name. Nathan, he had a weird name. He had a weird second name that I think was like at some stage in Maribor. I might be wrong.

But at some stage, he's had like a normal surname. And at some stage, one of his family members has misspelt it. Oh, I see. And it's like, oh, this is just the name now. now yeah just some dumb fuck family they couldn't spell his name properly anyway uh thanks nathan thank you very much to patreon subscriber lockie darlenberg d-a-h-l-e-n-b-u-r-g lockie Dahlenberg. Wow. Well, speaking of, yeah, family member. Spelling a name wrong, you have to imagine that's happened time and again with Dahlenberg. Well, more like if you're on the phone to someone and being like, yeah, the name's Dahlenberg,

and then you're getting the form back, and it's like D-A-R-L-A-N-B-U-R-G. Yeah. Yep. What do you think about what would be in a Dahlen burger? Well, are we assuming it's the Dahl is like – well, it could be – okay. There's a lot of different ways you could go with this. The Dahl could be the type of bread. So, you know, you've got Dahl as the like bun of the burger. Or you could be going Dahl as in dali salvador dali so you could get a burger that's kind of like half melted oh it's all

kind of curved around that would be kind of cool yeah i'm sure that's something that exists somewhere yeah that's very like a yeah like a japanese cafe like the dali cafe where it's all the food's all fucked up and melted right Right. Yeah, those are my two guesses. What do you think? You were just buying some time to look this guy up, weren't you? That's absolutely correct. Fantastic. How'd I do? You did good.

I think I did a fair bit with not much. Yeah, thanks for your effort. Yeah, you've done a lot more than... Oh, my God. Weirdly, there's more than one... There's more than one Lockie Dahlenberg but I've clicked on one and I think I've nailed it immediately I've got the right one immediately oh yeah because he's his cover photo on on Facebook yeah is a picture of a sunset with the caption, what a beautiful view.

And in front of the sunset, he's bent over and pulled his pants down. Fuck. And he's showing his ass. This is our man. So I think that's the guy. That's our guy for sure. I think that's the guy. Yeah.

Wait, that's his profile pic or his cover photo? His cover photo. That's fucking great. That's pretty good. That is really good. With the caption, what a beautiful view. I might go do that tonight. I might drive up.

I might drive out to the Grampians. Just get myself a new profile pic. That's great. Getting up like the top of one of those walks at the Grampians and there's just so many people there, especially there's so many tourists. You're just there, daxed down, and everyone's like mortified. Like, you know, just families from overseas and like couples

and you're just like, it's okay it's for my facebook cover photo and they're all immediately like oh well of course i have to i have to say this that i'm laughing a lot of this but i'm actually not laughing at that bit as much as the next bit so it's that lucky darlinburg he's got the sunset he's got he's doing a big old brown eye yep with the caption, what a beautiful view. One of his mates has commented, the only comment on the picture is one of his mates has commented, not for me.

That's great. Well, it's funny, isn't it? Because it's like you put something like that up. I don't know if you've ever uploaded something where you think you're just bracing yourself. You're like, I can hear it. Get ready for the comments to come rolling in. And I imagine he probably thought that that was going to be the case with this photo just like there'll be so much discourse about how funny i am yeah and i think almost more brutal than the

not for me is just the lack of the complete silence from everyone else yeah no one's even no one's bothering to engage with it that's what that's so much worse yeah man yeah this guy this fucking this fucking guy this fucking guy just just you know he's got it set on private but he's got that what's available is that yep just i love not private enough yeah oh yeah i love someone who's private but like the one bit you can see is he's fucking open asshole yeah yeah yeah wouldn't want you to see any of the other stuff yeah fucking hell yeah it's uh yeah i i mean i love the idea that this isn't the subscriber it's gotta be i know it's good i know but it's it's it's unlikely but just you know the guy listening who's like yes they read my name out and he's like you know his page is like he's a lawyer he's on there under a fake name he's got, you know, his page is like, he's a lawyer. He's on there under a fake name.

He's got the profile completely locked down. Well, what's your pick? There's two Lockie Dahlenbergs. There's the guy with his ass hanging out saying, check this out, what a beautiful view. Or there's this Lockie Dahlenberg who has nothing on his profile and two friends in the world. Yeah, the guy with two friends. The fucking loser. That's the guy who's subscribing to this podcast.

Yeah. I don't know. I think they're both up there. They're both realistic picks, I guess. I don't know. Maybe they're all friends and they just kind of like, they chipped in. There's like eight Lockie Dahlenbergers and they all went eighths in a subscription to the little Dum Dum Club Patreon. They share... They're like, hey, look, it's just going to be the same name on there anyway.

We'll share the name read. We'll all get together and listen to it. That's a great idea. And we'll just share the RSS feed around so we all get it. That's a great idea. For people to... Anyone who... If you've got the same name as someone...

Who also listens to the show. Go halves in a subscription. Yeah. That's a really good idea. How many John Smiths do you think we have that listen? We should get on the socials and we'll... Yeah. Get on the socials and post your name.

And we'll see if we... If you think you've got a common name... Yes. That the chances are high that there'd be someone else that listens with the same name. Yes. Let's see if we can get you matched up. common name, that the chances are high that there'd be someone else that listens with the same name. Yes. Let's see if we can get you matched up. Yeah, I wonder if we've lost any money by someone.

Like right now, say we do have both these two Lockie Dahlenbergs. They both actually listen to the show, but only one has subscribed, and the other one has gone. He was about to. Yeah, I should. I should. And then he said this week's one. Oh, this is what you'd come up with. Well, I guess this is why doing the lookup on Facebook does, you know, it actually has

some merit, even though nine times out of 10 when you do it, there's barely anything of interest on the page. Yes. But at least that, you know, you might be listening thinking like, well, I'm basically getting my name riffed on anyway. But then once we start getting specific on the Facebook, then you're like, oh, well, now I can't convince myself that they're talking about me.

Right. Because they're going specific on this guy's Facebook picture. So I guess I had better subscribe on my own merit. And then they'll look up my Facebook page and see me, you know, getting my dick out at a nice waterfall. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Putting my dick through the stream. So it's like I'm fucking the water. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Putting my dick through the stream, so it's like I'm fucking the water. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, thanks, Lucky. Thanks, Lucky. Whichever one you are. But I think I know. Thank you very much to Patreon subscriber Mitch Young.

Okay. Young Mitch. Yeah, all right. As he would be. All right. At Roll Call. We got a possible ACDC child. Really?

Well, I don't know. What do you mean child? Well, it could be a child of Angus Young. Oh. Or the other young. Yeah. Whatever his name was. One that is dead.

Yeah. What is his name? Stop yelling at me through the fucking podcast malcolm that's it yeah malcolm young um could be could be a yeah could be a relative could be um could be could be a relative of uh of even stevie young oh yeah what are they what are acdc doing now they're still they're just hanging on they're just hanging on because Malcolm is gone. There was that weird episode where Brian Johnson, the singer, was let go. But then all of a sudden he was back again.

Yeah. Then they let go of their weird fucking drummer who went to jail or was going to jail or whatever the fuck it was. And they were like, fuck off. And they wouldn't talk to him. And then all of a sudden he was back in the band but they're all still for intense and purpose for all intents and purposes they're they're they're still out there there's still a chance that they'll together tour or put an album out or something they're they're they're one of those bands that a lot where they're like no you guys are too old now it's like no we're not

no we're still together so i think them i think though was it the last album or was it the next album They basically used Parts From rehearsals or Whatever it was Where they got Yeah like Malcolm Young's

Rhythm guitar parts And Frankensteined them onto New songs I mean you have to assume that they would do a big this is the last time tour. Yeah. Certainly of Australia at the very least before they wrap it up. I'd go to that.

I'd go check out ACDC. Yeah, actually, they're not as old as I thought because I'm like, oh, yeah, they're too old. But Angus Young is 67. That's not that. I mean, Mick Jagger's... Is he 80? I think he's 80.

Fuck, I think he must be. Elton's 70-something. Elton's 75, I think. Yeah. He's wrapping it up. Farewell, Yellow Brick Road. Yes. What a great play on words.

Mick is 80 this year in July. Good Lord. That's old. Well, them as well. I mean, any band like that, you have to assume that they're not just going to stop touring at the point that they wrap up. They'll do like a, this is it.

Wouldn't you think? I think it gets taken out of your hands at some point. I don't reckon they will because I reckon they'll just, one of them will die. No, I know. But that's what's kind of weird about it is they toured in the last couple of years. And it was just like. They toured last year.

Right. And they were just like, yeah, here we are. We're just touring. But you have to think you'd be, yeah, you'd be looking at the clock and being like, hey, it would be nice to do a thing where it's like, you know, we bring some people out of the woodwork and we do a thing where it's like signposted as like, this is the end. Rather than just one day being like, oh, one of us is dead, so I guess that's it.

Yeah. We're never playing anymore. Yeah, I don't think they have it in them to go, oh, we retire. I think they just like the idea of, well, no, we're just going to keep going. They just burn out into the ground. Yeah. I mean, you totally can imagine like – you can imagine a scenario where like Keith carks it and they still do something.

Yeah, look. They do like a big show and they still do something. Yeah, look. They do a big show and they just have a parade of some of the greatest guitarists coming out and doing all of Keith's bits. I think they'd struggle. I think the big two, Mick and Keith, I don't think they can get away with it without one of them. I think if Ronnie goes next, then maybe.

Yeah. Because they just do what they've done with all the other ones and just replace them with black musicians that they don't put a spotlight on. Sure, sure. But I don't think you can get away with replacing either of the Glimmer twins.

Yeah, that's true. I've been waiting for ages. It's such a weird thing as bands get older, where the longer they take to put out an album, just because they've got better shit to do. They're like, oh, we'll just do... We've got something else to do. Nothing to prove.

Yeah. Not worth doing unless they feel kind of like pumped by it. They put an album out fucking 10 years ago or something now. Yeah, 2015? Yeah. Was that a bigger bang? No, no, no, no. That was properly years ago.

Okay. They put out a blues cover. They were going to write a new album, and then they just started doing blues covers. And they went, let's just fucking record this and put this out instead. And that was Blue and Lose from 2016. So there you go. That's nearly seven years ago now.

Yeah, yeah. That was just like something they'd put out while they were working on this new album. That's seven years ago. A Bigger Bang's 2005. That's the last proper studio album. 18 years ago. Yeah, right. Fuck.

But also, I mean, who cares? How many people are getting really jazzed up for a brand new Rolling Stones album at this point? Yeah. Well, Blue and Losing was actually good. It's better than their last two or maybe three albums before that. I would say they haven't... Some people would disagree with this. I think the last good album they did was Steel Wheels. Some people think that was a bad album.

I think it was not bad. Okay. But I'm sure it'll be... Whatever they put out at age 80 will be even better. Because that's when you're really peaking at rock and roll. Rock and roll. Yeah. Fuck, how did we get here?

What were we on? I don't know. Mitch Young. Oh, yeah. Young Brother. Oh, yeah. Thanks, Mitch. Thanks, Mitch.

Hope you get the boys back together soon and do a big tour. Because you're in ACDC now. That's what we decided, wasn't it? Yes. You're a descendant. You're a descendant of an ACDC member. You're the son of Malcolm. He gone.

So now you're it. You step in. You're it. That happens from time to time. Yep. People's kids join the band. That happened. John, what was it? John Bonham, the drummer for Led Zeppelin,

when they played their little replacement shows about 10 years ago. Again, that's another one. Why didn't they just fucking do a proper reunion tour? But for some reason, Robert Plant didn't want to do it. And that was it. Thank you very much to Patreon subscriber Ben Steele. Oh, Steele Wheels. Oh, there you go.

Whoa. Yeah. Spooky. Crazy. Benjamin Steele. That's what he's on there under? No, that's what I'm elongating it to. That's my hot riff.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's actually his name. Yeah. Yeah. eating it too yeah that's my hot riff yeah that's actually his name yeah yeah uh i'm i'm look i feel like the energy's low on this read today i'm so i don't know what's going on i'm so tired lately i maybe it's the heat i just feel like i'm at the moment i'm waking up and admittedly i am having some pretty shocking sleeps but i'm also just waking up already fried. I've just waken up with nothing in the tank. I don't know what's going on with me.

I am struggling today. I got home late last night, and then my wife left for a work conference this morning. Okay. And so I've got the child, and I was up to do breakfast and bring her to childcare and all this sort of stuff, and she wanted to play games at 6.30 in the morning. And I am pretty tired now. Yep. Yep. So that explains some of this lethargy.

There's just something about also just that, yeah, just that heat. It's so like the minute you're a little off and then you step outside into 40 degrees, it just pulls the energy from you. Yeah. And also, I feel like, because it's going to be a hot day. The day we're recording, it's going to be fucking hot in Rotterdam. and then you step outside into 40 degrees it just pulls the energy from you yeah and also i i feel like because it's going to be a hot day the day we're recording it's going to be fucking hot you know i almost i'm almost defeated before it happens because you're just like it's going to be fucked today oh fucking what's the point of anything yeah what's the point i'm

going to get and i've come over here i'm going to get stuck in the heat as well because like i said i didn't drive yep i've come over on pt i'm going to be out in the open i'm gonna get and i've come over here i'm gonna get stuck in the heat as well because like i said i didn't drive yep i've come over on pt i'm gonna be out in the open i'm gonna be exposed in this fucking horrible heat i hate it i hate getting stuck in the heat i don't mind it i like i like the heat i even just even at its worst there's just something about it where i'm like this is wild like i all the stuff that's bad about it i'm like this is wild like all the stuff that's bad about it i'm like this is this is great how fucked this is really yeah yeah no i don't mind it i think there's something nice about how it like it kind of it really unifies people you know if you've ever i mean my obviously my experience of working in an office is limited but that thing of like

if it's been a fucking caner of a night where it's just been so hot and then anything you do with people the next day everyone's on the same page everyone's just like didn't sleep a fucking wink last night it was fucked actually something about the heat that brings people together more than the cold yeah you know what there is the i'm trying to think of the positives the positive is when the cool change hits and then it's just like, oh, how good is this? Yeah, no, I hate that. What? I hate the heat being over.

Why? Because I like the heat. I like it hot. But like, there is too hot, isn't there, for you or not? Nah. Really? Nah, not at all. Can't get enough.

Wow. Love it. Man, I'm hiding from it. When that cool change happens, I'm just like, I open the doors. I'm like, yeah, good life. This is great. Let's start living again. There's a future to look forward to.

Let's get some work done. Yeah. But at the moment, it's like, no, it's all over. I hate it. I hate this. Yeah, no, I'm the complete opposite. Make it hotter. I'm not a climate change denier.

I believe in it, but I'm pro it. You want it. I want it more. Right. the complete opposite make it hotter i'm a i'm not a i'm not a climate change denier i believe in it but i'm pro it you want i want it more right it's funny like i started watching that netflix um breakpoint the like tennis doco series that they've made and uh because it just follows like the entire tour so the first couple of episodes are the australian open and they're just you know they're doing a really good job of like they're trying to sort of set the scene for anyone watching who's overseas or isn't as interested in tennis and they're like there's this voiceover being like yeah you know the australian open and it's uh you know it's pretty it's pretty wild because you know it's it's in the peak of the australian summer and you're getting some days where it's really hot and you're having to factor that in you're

just hearing it spelled out like that you're like yeah why is it then yeah it's so stupid that it's really hot and you're having to factor that in, you're just hearing it spelled out like that. You're like, yeah, why is it then? It's so stupid that it's like, remember that year where it was like this crazy heat wave? It was like 40 degrees every day. And for the first time they started talking about like, should we can this for a day? Because do you remember there was that guy? This is stuck in my head.

This is like seven years ago. But there was like a day when all the players were hallucinating. And it was like, there was a guy who, after the match, he was like, it was so hot. It's like 40-something degrees and you're running around in the direct sun. There's a guy who, I started hallucinating and thinking that I was playing against Snoopy. It's just stuck in my head this entire time. And, like, for the first time they went, yeah, maybe we shouldn't. Maybe it's a bad idea to have this at this time of the year.

Maybe we should. Maybe, like, the Comedy Festival and the Australian Open should, like, switch when they are. That's great. That's so funny. There we go. Before passing out during his match at the Australian Open against France's Benoit Paire, Canadian tennis player Frank Denchavich claims that he saw Snoopy from Peanuts.

Yeah. Wow. I'm so glad to have that validated because I was like, if I've like Mandela affected myself there and like invented that memory, I would have been so disappointed. Denchavich was unconscious for about a minute before coming back and losing the match in straight sets. Yeah, if you're unconscious during a match, I reckon, yeah, odds are you're going to lose.

ESPN should do a 30 for 30 just about that guy and that match. And they get, like, you know, they get some, like, great computer animators in and it's just basically you watching that entire match, but they've taken out his human opponent and replaced him with Snoopy. Fuck. I was dizzy from the middle of the first set, and then I saw Snoopy, and I thought, wow, Snoopy, that's weird. What I want to know is, we should track this guy.

This could be its a full this could be its own investigative podcast series i want to know what it's what always has stuck in my head about this is why snoopy yes i i want to know how much of a snoopy fan this guy is yeah because that dramatically changes the story it's like if this guy maybe he collects snoopy merch in his spare time you know what i mean like maybe he's a huge peanuts head he's got like all the collections of the books that they do he's got like you know anytime he's like not on the court he's wearing like a snoopy t-shirt then it's like you know it's like something that you really like a movie that you watch before you go to bed when you have a fever and you just imagine yourself in the movie yeah it's like that

makes sense but what's more interesting to me is that this a fever and you just imagine yourself in the movie. It's like, that makes sense. But what's more interesting to me is that this guy hasn't thought of Snoopy in like 30 years. And then all of a sudden he's just seeing him on the court. I need to know the level of investment that he has in Snoopy. Yeah, I don't think you would only hallucinate something that you really like and are invested in all the time. I would like to think that that's just come out of the blue.

And do you think that this experience would have made him more or less of a fan of Snoopy? Oh, that's a good question. Because being in that state must feel awful. There would be a moment where you think, like, I'm going to die. Like, I'm really unwell. Like, I've been out in the heat. I mean, you would think that I'm going to die more

if you saw Snoopy as the Red Baron. Yes, totally. Like, he's going to shoot me down in the middle of this match. This is bad. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, like, I mean, yeah, I've had an experience where I've been, like, in the direct heat, gotten sunburned on my head and just felt like my brain was cooking and it was just, like, an awful experience and I felt so sick.

So, I can imagine him being in that place that just then anytime if he's out in the street and he sees someone just wearing a little hat with snoopy on it yeah he just is taken back to that place and he has like a very you know visceral reaction where he starts sweating he sees he sees snoopy on someone's shirt or maybe he goes to like the thanksgiving day parade in new york and yeah yeah float and then he has to turn to his wife and go, quick, what's the temperature? We've got to get out of here. Is this happening or is it just really hot? Well, yeah.

And I mean, does that extend to the entire Peanuts family? Like, could he potentially watch the cartoons but someone just makes an edit for him where anytime Snoopy's on screen, they've edited it out? So he's still like a huge fan of Charlie Brown and the gang. He can look at Pigpen. He can look at Linus. He can look at Paddy. You know, he can look at all the rest of them and be fine. But it's just if that dog comes on screen, he's sweating.

What about this? What could you possibly be looking up? I found his fan page on Facebook. Okay. And he's not very famous. Like, he's only got 1.3K followers. Okay. So he's a good chance of responding if I send him a message right now.

Oh, yeah. Yeah. So what do I ask him? Hi, Frank. Big fan. Big fan of your hallucinations. Big fan. We were just talking about you on a podcast about tennis.

Yeah. Specifically. A tennis podcast or let's not go that far. I reckon say a podcast about tennis. On a big Australian podcast. Yeah. Specifically. Yeah.

When you hallucinated and saw Snoopy at the Australian Open. Yep. We just have a few questions regarding how much of a fan you were of Snoopy. Yep. How much of a... We have a few questions. Full stop. Were you a big fan of Snoopy at the time?

Yep. And... How much of a fan were you of Snoopy pre-Hallucination? Yep. And follow up, a fan were you of Snoopy pre-hallucination? Yep. And follow up, did your hallucination change how you feel about Snoopy

overall? Did your hallucination change your feelings about Snoopy, Charlie Brown, Pigpen, and the gang. Etc.

Woodstock, Spike. Is it Marcy? Is Marcy Peppermint Patty's little friend? That's right. All right, I'll put Marcy in there. Throw Marcy in. Just to show him you're a real head. You're not just some tie kicker.

You're actually invested. What about, like, example example how do you feel if you see yeah if you see a t-shirt with snoopy on it does it take you back to that moment how do you feel when you see a maybe this is too much up front maybe you just need to start the conversation and this can be like a back and forth dialogue once he responds. How do you feel when you see a little girl hold a football and then pull it away before he gets to pick it? Yeah. How do you feel when you see a kid that stinks so much that there's a cloud of dust surrounding them?

Is this guy, is he still playing? He's retired. He's retired. He's retired. Oh, damn. But he was... It would be cool if he was out here for the Open and we could try and get him on the pod. Yeah.

Could do a bonus ep with him. And then just dress up as Snoopy as he walks in. I mean, I've got... I mean, I've got a real Charlie Brown aesthetic going on already. I'm bald. I've got a striped shirt that's kind of the same Charlie Brown look to it. Yeah. Okay, well, it's all sent off to him.

I've got a dog that's kind of Snoopy adjacent. Oh, my God. You know what I just fucking realized? What? I was just concentrating on what was his profile pic and then his latest post. What I didn't realize. Oh, latest post, what I didn't realise. Oh, my God. What I didn't realise, and this is going back to what we've just been

talking about, his cover photo for his fan page is this. Snoopy holding a tennis racket. No. Well, that's even better. So then that's there. And then you've sent him a message going, hey, man, do you ever think about Snoopy anymore? Big fan.

Just missing the huge. Oh, my God. Wow. So do you think he's been dining out on this for the previous, what year was that that that happened? It's 20, like. 2015. 2015.

Yeah. So he's, right. So he's just been, maybe because been maybe because peanuts will peanuts will license themselves to anything there's like a lot of different clothing brands that i follow that have had like a peanuts collaboration so they've potentially so he's potentially gotten a sponsorship going off the back of that incident i think that's too far but i I think that he's been very funny with this and just whacked that up. So he's lent in.

He's just gone. You know what? Middling tennis career, I've got to be honest with myself. I was never going to be a champion. I was never going to be world number one. I was never going to win a Grand Slam. But now I've gotten lucky and I've had something kind of that's crazy sports folklore happen that's going to put me on the map more than any of those things potentially ever could.

So he's put that in his cover photo when it happened in 2014. Oh, so he got straight on it. Yeah. Wait, didn't you say it happened in 2015? No, I think I've mixed that up. But no, it's 2014. So he's done it. Right.

Okay. So that's happened during the Australian Open. So that would have happened in January. Okay. Yeah, that's 2014. So he's done it, right, okay. So that's happened during the Australian Open, so that would have happened in January. Okay, so he's... Yeah, that's happened in January. Then he's updated his Facebook profile in June of 2014. So it's taken him a few months to, I don't know, rehydrate and then see the funny side of it.

So he put the photo up next day. Maybe he did it on the court. No, no, he's done it he's done it six months five six months later oh the photo so wait the cover photo of photos five six months later okay sure sure okay yeah okay sure sure sure sure yeah but then he's replaced it with something else in the meantime but then he's re-uploaded it he's gone back 2021 really yeah that's interesting to get that maybe that was a lot of people in lockdown. Just, you know, I've watched everything else. Yeah.

I've gone through all of the Sopranos and Game of Thrones. I'm going to re-watch old Australian Opens. Yeah, yeah. And then a lot of people rediscovered him through that. Yeah. Fuck, that's great. Guys, I like he's got a bunch of likes from putting it up first. And then he's put it back up in 2021.

Got one like. You should comment. Not for me. All right. Well, thanks, Frank. Is that who it was? I guess. No.

No, Ben Steele. Ben Steele. All right. Man, this is exciting. What's this guy's name again? Frank. I love that his name's Frank. Danchevich.

You're never going to be a champion. Honestly, you're never going to be a tennis champion with the name Frank. I wonder if... Did he get anything... Did anything happen? Yeah, look up his career stats. Like, where was he? Did he ever...

You know, was he ever ranked? Is this truly the highlight of his career, seeing Snoopy? It sounds like it. What was Frank's rank? Look up Frank's rank. He's... Let's see... He... Mm-mm-mm. Look! Rank He's Let's see He Got to

Look He got to the second round Of three of the four slams Is that something? Second round Okay So he wouldn't have been Seated at any point

By the sounds of it Maybe not No Yeah Highest ranking Is 175 So you're not getting seeded yeah okay if you're 175 but he's still you know he's he's he's he's on the board yeah he's getting there he's getting a number he's doing all right oh here we go career prize money 1.9 mil not too bad I mean sure He's probably played for

10 years or something Yeah Okay But you're getting sponsorships You're getting Yeah yeah yeah Whatever You've done alright

He's had a good life Like I said I would love to know I mean if you had a Canny enough manager There'd be someone in your camp The day after that Being like

We gotta get To Charles Schultz estate On the phone Yeah They're very You know They'll license themselves out to anything. We could have a collab going on here.

God, I would have loved that. Yeah. That's fucking awesome. It's, yeah, it would have been. And again, at the very least, if that's not going to happen for him, if you're playing him, surely you're coming out to warm up in the Snoopy outfit. Oh. Just to put him off you're no yeah you're you're like you know obviously if you're sponsored

by nike or adidas it's like that is the thing i love about tennis it's like the people in this doco it's like anytime they're on camera they just got to be wearing the full kit it's like nike just go here's every bit of clothing we've ever made you make damn sure the fucking second you step out that front door, you've got to be wearing all of it. I kind of like that about it. You just get given a wardrobe that you have to wear everywhere. And you're on the phone to them.

And you're playing him in the semi-final or whatever. And he's on a run. He's having a real journey, man, real comeback, kind of like this is it. He's in the second round of the French Open the next year. You're on the phone to the brand ambassador for Nike and you the French Open the next year. You're on the phone to like the brand ambassador for Nike and you're like look no I know what the

contract says. I know how much you're paying me. But what you're paying me it's only that's only worth a damn if I'm winning. If I'm a champion.

And I'm telling you the only way to beat this guy is to get in his head coming out dressed like Snoopy. All you need to do. You've got to let me

off the hook just for one match. I'll get the Snoopy outfit. You just put a swoosh All you need to do. You've got to let me off the hook just for one match. I'll get the Snoopy outfit. You just put a swoosh on the top of it. You've just got to make me a shirt that's got the swoosh and it's like Snoopy's dressed up like the Red Baron and he's like flying the swoosh around. Yes.

I'm just asking you to put that together for me in 24 hours. You're Nike. Call up whatever sweatshop it is and get them to rip this out overnight. How hard is it to put a white swoosh on the fucking black ear of Snoopy? Just do that. Yeah. This is the best piece of content we've ever done. See, I was feeling bad about some of these reads.

I was like, we're low in energy, but then this is just fascinating. This is great. Well, you know, this is a great example of it's always darkest before the dawn. We're literally what led us into this was just both going like, bit tired, bit flarked, can't really be bothered. It's too hot. It's hot. Next thing you know.

It's hot. Next thing you know, we're messaging. Yeah. We're messaging a tennis player. A retired tennis player. A retired tennis player. Whose peak was 180 in the world. Genuinely, I think we should try.

Saying, remember Snoopy when your profile pic clearly has Snoopy in it. I mean, we've got to get this guy on Zoom and have a chat. If he responds and he's into it, I reckon we've got to get this guy into the family. I love the idea of chatting to this dude. I just can't believe... Because I was really worried that that was an example of something where it's like... It's so long ago that you're misremembering it, and your brain's made it a little spicier than it actually was.

But to have you Google it and it's like spot on to what I said, that was a fucking great moment in my life. I'm so glad that that actually happened how I remembered it happening. Great. Thanks, Ben. Thanks, Ben. Thanks, Ben. Thanks, Ben. Thanks, Ben. Okay.

Right. Well, we've only got... I guess we found out... Let's just do one more and thus discover how many... Is X. I'm back to being tired again. That tennis thing. That was all the reserves.

That was like the light was on and now the light's flashing. It's like, can't pull in now. Yep. You've had your little burst of adrenaline, but that can't last forever. It's just adrenaline. Nope. Yep. So, hang on.

Nathan Richards and Lockie Dahlenberg, Mitch Young, Ben Steele. If we do one more, that means it's five. So, X equals five. X equals five. Wow. Well, that's interesting because,. So, X equals five. X equals five. Wow. Well, that's interesting because, yeah, X in Roman numerals is ten. So, it's like half of that. That sort of makes sense.

Not at all, but, yeah, sure. Let's say something. Okay, let's just do one more. All right. Pardon me. I feel a bit like that way myself. In the interest of full transparency, big yawn. Yes.

Thank you very much to Patreon subscriber Comedy M Schultz. All right. Yes. And that's the famous cartoonist, isn't it? Is it? Yeah. I've never heard of that. No?

Didn't they... What was that famous comic strip that they drew? Is that the comic strip where their main character ran out and played tennis and saw a hallucination of Frank Dantrovich? I guess. Sure. Okay. All right. Well, thanks, everyone.

And on behalf of me and Carl, good grief. Thanks for listening. Get on to littledumbdumbclub.com get on the live show tickets get onto frank dentrovich and ask him about snoopy yeah actually you know what let's let's get this guy back into the spotlight yeah i want him to sort of lean in a bit more yeah go send him a message get him get into um because he's been retired and all of a sudden he's gonna his fan page is like absolutely untouched there's tumbleweeds all over it. What about we make up a little animation where it's like Frank Denkovich turns up in the world of Peanuts, right?

And he sees Charlie Brown and he's like, that's that kid. And he's like saying to him, hey, your dog beat me in a game of tennis once. But then you cut down to Charlie Brown and he's just hearing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's pretty good. See, that's good. Thank you. I feel like I'm about to hallucinate as well.

Yeah, all right. Let's get out of here. See you, mates. See you, mates.