The Little Dum Dum Club with Tommy & Karl - 646 - Alex Ward & Ben Russell

Episode Date: February 22, 2023

We're up in the baby's room this week with BEN RUSSELL and ALEX WARD! Tommy's been investigating some local businesses in his temporary neighbourhood, Karl gets some wedding ring advice from Ben and Wardy, we compare the different ways that fans interact with us, PLUS Karl's learned about a buxom Malaysian ghost that puts every other paranormal legend to shame. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Today on the Little Dumb Dumb Club, a brand new episode with guests Ben Russell and Alex Ward. We have some live shows fast approaching Saturday, March the 11th in Adelaide at the Rhino Room and then a month of Saturdays in April at Morris House in Melbourne. That's it, April 1, April 8, April 15, April 22. They're all going to be crackers. We've got guests penciled in for all of them. They're going to be great shows, so get along. LittleDumbDumbClub.com is where you can get your tickets for those shows.

You can also find the link to our Patreon, where you can get bonus episodes every week and support the show and get your name potentially read out at the end of the episode. We'll be back in Talking Dumb Dumb to talk to you more, but until then, enjoy this episode with Ben Russell and Alex Ward. Hey, mates. Welcome once again into the Little Dumb-Dumb Club for another week. Thank you very much for joining us.

My name is Tommy Dassler. I'm with me as always, the other half of the program, Carl Chandler. G'day, dickhead. Joining us today, two great guests. Please welcome back onto the show, Ben Russell and Alex Ward. Welcome Alex. Thank you. Welcome to the show Alex. Welcome to our third host.

Welcome to you also Ben. Thank you so much Alex. How are you today? What's going on? I'm good. I'd actually love to speak to you alone if you're too good. We can duck out of here. That's fine.

We're once again recording in my temporary accommodation. We're upstairs in the baby's room. Ben, thank you for vaping immediately as soon as we got here. I'm sure that'd be very appreciated by the host. You're welcome. They won't know. It's a secret. Vaping while surrounded

by children's books as well. It's peaceful. Why is a seven-month-old got lung problems? Actually, if it is the baby's room, why is there a fucking big computer in here? Because that's mine

and I'm baby. Babies love screens. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Babies love gaming. Good morning, video games. You're allowed to have access to screens already

and you're only, what, 35? Months. Yeah, right. 35 months. Which is nearly three years. Nearly three years. I'm sitting on a nursing chair. And have you weaned yet?

Well, no, he's still on the tit. He's still on the... Not for me. Come up here. Come up on here. Except he cries when he is on the tit rather than off. He cries when he's off and he cries when he's on. What a big sook. I was excited when that Ween cover band played at Cappas 40th.

Yeah, yeah. Different kind of Ween. Right. I got really pumped up. I was like, here we go. This is my time to shine. Did you enjoy it? The band?

Yeah. Yeah, they were all right. Not as good as Hot Milk from mama's boobie not as good as hot milk from mama's boobie yeah is that is that is that another cover band hot milk from mama's boobie chili peppers that's a weird song isn't it so we're in uh yeah this is uh staying here for like another week or so. And you're a local of this area. Took me 10 minutes to walk here. Fucking hell.

Very close. Took me half an hour to drive here. Yeah, me too. Sorry, suckers. Took me zero seconds. Just had to wait for the knock on the door. But you'd be familiar with this. This is a local business that I've been interested in from before I lived here,

but now I'm seeing it constantly. Scarface Pizzeria. Never heard of it. Really? I was wanting to go along with you. Where's that? It's down the road. This down here.

Yep. Scarface Pizzeria. First of all. Say hello to my little Hawaiian. If you took any. So it's a Cuban pizza? Well this is it The character of Scarface Not Italian

No So also Pizza traditionally Family Family food Good time family meal Yeah Just an incredibly violent thing

To name your family establishment after Yes Classic like bullet holes In the like In the like frontage of the shop Someone's chopping someone up with a saw. I think my brain's wired to not even see those sort of stores. Also, this is not a one-off.

There used to be a place called Little Havana in St Kilda that was exactly the same. Obsessed with Scarfo. Same deal. It's an ongoing obsession with Italian restauranteurs. There is often a Godfather pizza at a lot of... But that's Italian. Is that an actual...

That's Italian. That's something. It must be the Scarface pizzeria proprietors going, well, okay, Godfather's been done to death, but you know what hasn't been done to death, that is kind of similar time period, similar level of esteem in the world of cinema is Scarface. And it's crime as well.

Yeah. But it's like, yeah, well then just have the fucking Toy Story pizzeria. Yeah, what's Avengers pizza? Terminator 2. The Green Lantern. The Green Lantern is just pepperoni with like some jalapeno. Terminator 2 pizzeria. Yeah, I'll be back.

I'll be back in 10 to 15 minutes. I'll be back because the pizza's so good. I'll be back. You don't need to be. We deliver. The new pizzeria, Blow. Oh, yeah, Blow. The movie Blow.

Blow Pizzeria. I did not think of Blow. I thought of the movie Up. Very different movie. When you said Blow, I was like, is that Up? No. What's Blow? You can have whatever you want.

Is Blow a movie? Yeah, Blow's a movie. It's about cocaine. It's about cocaine. You ever heard of that? No, this a movie? Yeah, Blow's a movie. It's about cocaine. It's about cocaine. Yeah. You ever heard of that? You ever heard of drugs? This sounds like a porno.

It could be. Probably not. I've never heard of drugs. What are those? What do they feel like? That's smart. They feel like... That's smart to say in public.

Yeah. Pretend you've been in a children's room. This will be presented in court. This will be proof. Yeah. That you weren't a mule. I have four or drugs. Did you know that? Really? Yeah. You will be proof that you weren't a mule. I have for all drugs. Did you know that?

Right. Really? Yeah. You just said no and you never looked back? Yeah, I said no thank you and then I looked back. What's your least favourite drug? Oh, probably Tylenol. Tylenol?

Panadol. Yeah, okay. You don't like Panadol? You like headaches. You're anti them. I love headaches. It makes me feel alive. Yeah. anti-them. I love headaches. It makes me feel alive.

Yeah. It proves that your brain still works. If it's aching, it can't be broken. Exactly. Did you guys know I quit coffee last year? No. Did you know that I quit a drug? I didn't. You didn't tell me this.

I thought you were going to say... How could you not tell me that you did this? Well, there's a reason I didn't tell you. I thought you were saying, did you hear that I quit comedy last year? I'm like, fuck, why did we book you today? Hey, Woody, can you come to the podcast? I didn't tell you. I thought you were saying, did you hear that I quit comedy last year? I'm like, fuck, why did we book you today? Hey, Woody, can you come be the broadcaster? Okay, but you're not going to like it. I didn't tell anyone that I quit and I just keep showing up to gigs I get booked on.

I was like, all right, I have... Why did you bomb Woody? Why was that so bad? I told you, I quit comedy. Yeah. I'm just saying things up there. I got up and I read a brochure. I quit coffee and nobody gave a shit.

And it was so hard for me to quit and nobody cared. Nobody treats it like a real drug. Also, it was so hard. Do you know what happens in the morning when you don't drink coffee? What? Nothing. Nothing. You just wake up and you're just like, well, I guess that's it.

Just imagine that all day. I'm glad I didn't hear about it ongoing, but I do admire you. I relapsed. I'm back on it. Oh, really? Thank God. So I'm back on. I'm less proud of you.

Ordering a decaf is embarrassing. It's like an adult baby Chino. It's so boring. I just had like a stomach bug one week and so I had to go off all acid and then when I went off coffee, I was like, oh, I feel quite calm. So I just stayed off it, but it turns out it was so boring. I just had a stomach bug one week, and so I had to go off all acid. And then when I went off coffee, I was like, oh, I feel quite calm. So I just stayed off it. But it turns out it was so boring. If you can clear those five days, this man here never had a coffee.

Never been a coffee drinker. A gold star. I guess that's why you're so boring. Oh, yeah. Get him. That's why I'm so calm all the time. Yeah, actually, I would hate to see you on an espresso. Have an espresso before spleen one day, and I'll end up crying in the time. Yeah, actually, I would hate to see you on an espresso. You'd be hepped up.

Have an espresso before spleen one day, and I'll end up crying in the kitchen. You ever had a Red Bull? Maybe I should get on it. Well, how about this? So Scarface Pizzeria. Yeah. So that's in the neighborhood.

I was taking a little walk the other day, about half a block down, so maybe eight or so businesses down the road. A barbershop. I think it's pretty new, Scarf Fades. Scarf Fades Barbershop. That's funny because fades

is a term that you use in haircuts. It's a type of haircut. And also scar is what you can get when your hairdresser isn't very good at their job. But it's also the name of a popular movie directed by Brian De Palma. Which one? Blowout.

Yeah. Blowout. Big blowout. Yeah, so that's weird, isn't it? It's a coincidence. I don't even think, I mean, is this crazy to assume that it's not even directly referencing the film? My read on this was that it's referencing the business from Eight Doors Up.

You know what I mean? Right, right. They're doing a little callback to like – If you like that pizza. It's like pretty weird that there's a pizza place called Scarface, isn't it? Yeah, yeah. We'll get a load of this. Do you think they own the same – maybe they're the same owners.

Yeah, I tried to look this up and I couldn't. Do they have anything to do? Are they themed or is it kind of like George's Bar where it's just, it's, hey, this is George's Bar. Yeah. We got a name. This is the name. It's named after George Costanza, but that's it.

Yeah, no, they don't even have the, they've got a little kind of like silhouette kind of Tony Montana on the logo. And that's as far as either of them. You know there's no photos of George anymore. Yeah, they go rid of them. There's just like one photo of George Costanza and that's it. Because there is a bar in Fitzroy called George's Bar and it was supposed to be...

It was promoted as like a George Costanza themed bar. It had heaps of him at first. Right. It was in the news. Then the lawyers got involved. Now there's just one photo of Costanza.

Right. And now it's like that's too big of a name for one photo. Yeah. Yeah. It just changed the name. Yeah.

Yeah. Oh, but it's such a successful bar. It's like Scarface. So maybe this is in Northcote. You're talking about Northcote. Business callback. I love it. Maybe this is just like,

is this part of town called Little Havana or something? Oh, maybe. Like you've got Chinatown. Little Cuba. Yeah, Little Cuba. Little Cuba. Where'd you get that haircut? And you go, I got it eating pussy, man.

I mean, it's appropriate because I do feel like I'm in exile down here. You know, I'm living away from my usual place. I've had to flee Fitzroy. I'm just hiding out here. You're driving around in a 1952 Buick. I feel like these places weren't here until you got here. Yeah. I feel like these are your businesses.

Well, Dassolo is a traditional Cuban name name yeah yeah you've opened up this people think it's italian but it's actually not but i yeah i i don't know is i do i love the idea of like a of a of a local business just riffing on the name of a business a bit down the street it's good it's sick what would I'm trying to think of another. 1-800-LASAGNA becomes triple zero lasagna. Yeah, exactly. Like an old movie. Scarface isn't that big of a movie.

I don't know if I'd associate it with two shops. It's big with, I would say, over 30s dudes with no social skills and think that that's cool. It's the clientele that are going to love a large pizza and a 1.25 litre Coke or want a fade haircut. It's marketed towards people that miss having, there's no Granny Mays anymore. There's no thin crust there. It's all deep pan. RIP Scarface, you would have loved what's new.

You would have loved silk Mitch Dowd boxer shorts. Say hello to my little friend and then pulling his pants down and it's just the Tasmanian devil. You missed out on a Sylvester the Cat silk vest. I'm part of that generation where silk boxer shorts were big. silk vest. I'm part of that generation with silk roster swords were big.

Oh yeah. I think that that directly sort of correlates to why my testicles are

hanging quite low because they lacked support in a developmental time. Oh right. Yeah cool. Another episode where we hear all about your balls. I know it's only 10 minutes in

but I was pretty naively thinking we'll get out of this. We're going to talk about Perth next. Have you? The Ben Russell bingo card. And it's two squares. And everyone wins every session. Balls in Perth. Oh, God.

We're going bankrupt running this night. Everyone always wins. But how are they? Give us a check. Give us a status check. I don't want to talk about my balls, but I'm just saying. No, do it.

My balls are great. Don't do it. I'm liking it. There's a nice little wedding ring you got there. A nice gold one. Thank you. Is it proper gold? Yes, it's real gold.

He doesn't lose his. I know. It's real gold. He can have real gold. I know. Yeah, what Thai market Is that from Yeah It's not

It's from a proper jeweler What Can you get them from there now A proper jeweler in Thailand No no no Because that Kyle can relate to In Melbourne So this is

Well this is what happened to me The other day Scarface jewelers That's appropriate I Yeah that works That tracks I

Because I lost my wedding ring And then I got to replace one for 85 cents in Thailand and you are 85 Thai cents you are one of the most

romantic men that I know well it was romantic because you know what I was doing the only reason I bought it when I was in Thailand

was because older Thai women were hitting on me in bars and so I thought I better buy a bring that is romantic women women were hitting on you in bars and so I thought I'd better buy a ring. That is romantic.

Women were hitting on you. Yeah, it's true. It is true. It is true. So anyway, I bought a ring and it was too big for my finger. I didn't even bother fucking trying it out properly. I don't know, Matt. I think I expand in Thailand. You didn't bother trying it out, putting a ring on your finger.

Yeah, I don't know. You swell up from the heat and the coconut milk. Yes, exactly. I put on my finger and it went on. I just didn't check. Well, you're full of cum from not having sex with those ladyboys. Plump. Yes.

And did they, could you tell if they ever wore satin boxes? All the cum goes to my fingers. They're just pulling up their dress and there's the Tweety Bird boxes. Oh, yeah. Hell, yeah. Big dangly balls. Did you have any inkling that she might have actually been a guy and then you flash back to that?

The Homer Simpsons box. The donut. They weren't Marge boxer shorts. They were Homer boxer shorts. That was a man. The pink donut right on the crotch. Yeah, I should have known. It was all right there.

Yeah. So the ring was too big, so it was constantly falling off. And so the other day I realized it was gone again. I lose it every now and then. My daughter will go on a scavenger hunt around the house and find it. She's quite good at it. Oh, you're sending her out to do the dirty work. She loves a bit of hide and seek.

She loves looking for stuff. She's close to the ground, closer to me, got less things going on in her life. She's free up. Yeah, Closer to me. Yep. Got less things going on in her life. Yeah, yeah. She's free up. Yeah, exactly. Naturally inquisitive nature. Yes. Whereas when you hit your age, you don't give a fuck about finding out anything anymore. No.

No. Even where my things have gone. That's learning a new thing. No, thank you. What fits on my finger? Nah. Nah. I'm full up there.

Yeah, yeah. So it's gone. And then I was like, oh, fuck it. And I'm like, we're looking around the then i was like oh fuck it i'm like we're looking around the house can't find it my god damn and is the wife being clued into this so this is just a this is just a you and absolutely not because so this is the thing the only time my wife notices if i've got the ring on or not is if we go to somewhere formal if we're going out together and then she's sort of checking on me to make sure i'm wearing it because she doesn't want us walking in hand in hand and then going oh you don't even have your ring on.

You know, we're at a proper event. She doesn't give a fuck what I'm wearing in front of you goons. But like in front of like family and friends, it's like you've got to be dolled up and wearing a pull. But your defense could be, well, you wear the ring to let people know that you're a fan. Yeah, I'm like when you're with her. But if you're with me,

that's, I mean, that speaks for itself. You are on my hand. You are my ring. Yeah, exactly. So. I love you, Carl. That's so romantic. So I'm like, fuck, I think I've probably lost it.

And a wedding's coming up. I better make another try. I do another lap around the house, get a little blanket in tow, looking under the couch. There's places I can't get to. Not nowhere. So then I go, you know what? The place I legit take it off is when I go to the gym in's places I can't get to nowhere so then I go you know what the place I legit take it off

is when I go to the gym in case like I'm lifting stuff and it scratches my precious 85 cent ring so I take it off because it's out of warranty by now

yeah yeah yeah plus you don't want all those dudes to know you're married yeah oh that's great stuff I love it when a gay person says imagine being gay.

Yeah, yeah. I was thinking it, don't worry. It's still funny. That's why my whole life is hilarious. Every day I look in the mirror and I'm like, you gay bo. You're in the middle of sex and you just start pissing yourself. Yeah, that's not why I'm pissing myself. If I think of any singers about Carl being gay,

I'll just write them and pass them over to you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm youring myself What do you If I think of any If I think of any singers About Carl being gay I'll just write them And pass them over to you Yeah I'm your safe man She's allowed to say The G word Yeah I'm just going to

Ratatouille you Just whispering in your ear Right Okay Yeah So I I went It's the only place

I take it off When I go to the gym And I put it in my pocket And then I don't zip My shorts up So that sometimes It goes missing like that So I go to the gym. I put it in my pocket and then I don't zip my shorts up so that sometimes it goes missing like that. So I go to the gym, go up the top floor. You don't zip up.

Yeah, I don't know. You just put it in there. It's a cock hanging out. No, not that zip. That's what I thought you meant. I was like, you're asking for these jokes. I don't understand. Just zip up my pockets.

They're shorts, you know. So when do you start fucking these guys? Doesn't zip up. Ironically, the ring is on there. Yeah, yeah. He hasn't lost his cock ring, guys. It's the other one. So is it at the gym, you reckon?

Well, so that's the last resort. So then I go to the gym. So you bring a blanket into the gym? No, I don't bring a blanket into the gym. Doesn't want the guys knowing. That he, once upon a time had sex with that I'm a breeder

no no no that's like wearing a wedding ring all over again you're kidding really showing off

what's going on so I go in there and I'm on this it's a two floor gym and so where I'm working it's up the top so I go there and go

is there a lost property up here or whatever and they're like no one wants to fucking check that's the weird thing about the gym is i'm standing there for like 10 20 minutes at the desk and then i go i just yell at a guy who's doing like personal training someone else go can is it can i check lost property like i think i've lost something and they go yeah just fucking just fucking go around and go through everything and so then i'm just like in the desk. You're giving free reign in the lost property. Absolutely free reign behind the desk of the gym.

People are coming in asking questions on my... The problem is that someone else has already had free reign at the lost property box and gone, oh, look at this fucking piece of shit. Yeah, that'll be good. I needed a washer for my drain. Easy. Actually, I usually get better ones than this,

but I guess this will do. Because that's really what it is. It's like a washer. That's about what it is. Right. So I go through all the drawers and it's like, fuck, this is bad. People are legit coming up and asking questions and I'm going, oh, you have to ask those people over there or whatever.

I don't work here. I'm just a scavenger. Yeah, I'm just looking through everything. Yeah. And what's in there? What are you finding? Oh, like fucking, what was in there? Just bunch of, like weirdly, really,

like a heap of like weird looking rings and stuff, like stuff that I wasn't going to claim, stuff like, you know, I'm not going to come home with like a, I think my wife's going to notice if I come back with the full Lord of the Rings ring on my finger. Sure. Well, she only notices if you put it into hot flame. Yeah.

ring on my finger. I can't. She only notices if you put it into hot flame. I'm proud not to get that joke. Blanket gets possessed.

It's actually very clever. Crawling around. Because the scripture on the ring can only be revealed once it's put into

hot flame. And then it reveals in black speak the speak of Mordor. I think I'll take being gay at the gym.

Thank you, Ben. Thank you very much. Crazy whoever. Being gay at the gym for 500. Crazy that whoever lost that ring lost it the only time they probably went to the gym. Oh, yeah, yeah. It is a weird place to lose it.

You're right. Now I can't turn invisible. Yeah, good place. Yeah, it's just heaps of shit um nothing good and so then i go this place has been cleaned out like there's nothing good in there um so i go downstairs and i go and so downstairs is like the proper reception they got the desk down there and they got the full entourage of like there's four girls working behind the desk and i go have you got another like lost property bit down here and they they're like, yeah, we do. I said, I've lost my wedding ring.

And there's four girls like, oh, my God, what? You've lost your wedding ring? I'm like, oh, yeah. I mean, hopefully it's there. And they all get really concerned. And they're like, oh, my God. Oh, you've lost your, oh, I hope we find it. And they all go through the drawers. You poor sexy man.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, technically, you're not married anymore. If there's anything we can do to help. So then they go, one of them like pulls out like a, and goes, I'm really sorry. We've gone through all, everything and we can't find anything. All we can find is this. And they pull up like a little sandwich bag with my ring in it and go, we can't find your wedding ring.

We've just found this sort of weird thing. And I'm like. That's it. No,'m like, that's it. No, that's it. In the sandwich bag. How embarrassing. Yeah, they've gone, I've gone, that's it. And they've gone, what?

What? And I go, oh, no, it's not like, but it's not that bad. Like, I've already lost one. So that's just another one I bought for 80 cents in like a Thai market. And they're like, all four of them just turn on me and go what? you've got to come up with a lie for the ring you've got to come up

with another story about the ring it has to be so sentimental yeah yeah it has to be yeah this one I got from my Thai grandmother yeah yeah

it's actually less bad to have just gone yeah that's my wedding ring yeah yeah yeah that's my original wedding ring yeah I was just I just got that

because all these other Thai women were trying to fuck me yeah so that's my original wedding yeah i was just i just got that because all these other thai women were trying to fuck me yeah so uh i'm a feminist yeah i've just got to get this ring back just in time to go back and to thailand again and not fuck anyone all right so that's a sad story got it back made me feel bad yeah i got it back but now it's gone again it's gone again it's gone again wow that's gone again. It's gone again. Wow. That was last week. That was a whole week ago. There's nothing sacred. Yeah.

But you wore it to the wedding? I wore it to the wedding. Okay. I reckon you could get more Patreon followers just by saying that if you get, you know, 50 more followers, you'll buy a new ring with the money. Oh, what if I said yes? Because I feel like people would feel for you at this point after that. That's great.

Live episode from Zammles. You should just not take it off. That's what I do with mine. You just don't really take it off. Do you scratch it up and do stuff like that? Yeah, I scratch it up and it's going to happen. And then in 40 years you just get polished or whatever. Yeah, you can get it buffed if you want. Yeah, I think you can't buff

a washer though. Get a real ring. Why are you still getting it ring you got the Patreon money and you still get a ring I don't know if this wasn't clear by our reactions but I reckon you should get an adult ring

okay alright and I can never remember this part of the story does your wife know that this is a knock off ring

yes she's clocked at this point that it's a knock off at some point she found out right this is the marriage equivalent of getting braids. Is it?

Bali braids. Yeah, that's what you're rocking around with. I actually, I do feel, I know how you feel because I lost my engagement ring. I got it back. Oh. Remember, I lost it. Last time I was on the pod, I hadn't found it yet. Yeah.

But I got it. But I don't, I'm trying to sell it. Why? I thought you were about to say I'm celibate. No, I'm trying to sell it because I don't like, I chose the ring, but now I don't like it. And Hannah's fine with it, but I don't know where to sell it to. Wait until you get married first before you sell it.

Oh no, I'm just going to get a new one. That's bad luck. It just feels. Do you think it's bad? Hang on, did you? I just don't wear it now. Who paid for the ring? We bought each other ones.

Okay. So you're allowed to sell it. Mine was more expensive. All right. so you're allowed mine was more expensive all right so you're allowed interesting you're allowed to sell it yeah your partner's all good with it yeah she doesn't care she'd rather me wear it whereas now i don't want to wear it it's like it's not what do you can i ask i don't know anything about any of this um with the engagement ring so when you actually get married and you've got the wedding ring are you keep do you keep the engagement ring you can wear both i actually was it like trading in like a ps4 for a ps5 no no no

it's backwards compatible you don't need this old tech anymore you can wear the engagement i could just wear a wedding ring i could just wait i could just wait it's like it's like if you've been married for 20 years it means if you've been married for 20 years, it means if you've been married for 30 years, it means you still have to carry around the Atari 2600. Right. That's when you got it. That was your ring name. Sure. You can't trade it.

Because they haven't put those old games on the new hardware. Yeah. So if you want to keep playing them, you've just got to hang on to the console. I didn't propose with the engagement ring I ended up getting. I proposed with a tie washer. I proposed with like a signet ring because I didn't want to, I knew she was quite picky.

And so I got like another ring and it had a, like much cheaper, only like 300, 200 bucks or something. And it just, it had a stone that meant like love or whatever. So then I did that. Okay. If I'm going to propose, I want to make sure it's in a real. Max has one that works with the wedding ring. It's a pair.

Side by side. They fit into each other. A little Voltron. Side by side fingers. If I'm going to propose, I'm going to make sure I do it in a way that ends up being a real caper, so that I've got a ripper of a story for a wedding. You know the stories where it's like,

I got up at the crack of dawn and i suggested we go on a long walk and she didn't want to go on a walk and then i lost the picnic basket you know all that kind of shit i want to reverse engineer an absolute debacle for my you should do one of those public ones you know that people do oh flash mob no oh yeah flash mob is good but just do it at like a live dum-dum yeah yeah that's's romantic. Last night on my solo show, eight people wildly applauding. Sunday afternoon. Coming down from the final night party. Imagine if it was a really bad show.

Like, it's not even your fault. They're just being weird. And in my head I'm like, what? You weren't a great crowd, but... You don't really deserve this. She's been in the show the whole time you got eight people

in four of them are on half ticks like a couple of comps in there three have passed participant passes and it's been a yeah it's been a

shocker of a show but I'm like well I was planning on doing this so I've just got to do it and it's barely getting a response because

people hated the gig so much people just want to get out of there people are just worried about her committing to me. They're like,

don't do it. Imagine that they walk out halfway through your proposal. Gotta get to another show. I hate watching those public proposals. Oh yeah.

They're just so cringy. It is a bit weird. Yeah, up on the like, up on the screen at a sporting event has to be one of the worst ways you can do it. It's just keep it to yourself.

Yeah, what is it about you that wants everyone else to see it? I don't quite understand. So what? People get engaged all the time. You're not special. And you're probably going to get divorced later. Yeah. I know that's a pessimistic thing.

That's a bad public thing. You're putting pressure on your partner. A public divorce. Breaking up publicly, that's good. This is the thing. It's like they've done the, you know, there's whatever the stat is about the number of marriages that end in divorce. It's like that's out there, but they need to start breaking it down in terms of those ones that got divorced,

how many of them were proposals that happened on the big screen at a sporting event. You know, if they found out that it was like 100%. That's a good stat. 100% of people that do it that way end up getting divorced. Then you could get into it. If you're at the footy and you saw that on the screen, you'd be like, I know this couple aren't going to make it. That's fucking awesome. That's awesome.

And you know how you need sometimes reasons for the prenup or whatever to be not like whatever. You need to have reasons to get the house. What if it was like we're getting divorced? Oh, was it adultery? You'd be like, no, but he did propose on the big screen. It'd be like, the house is yours. No further questions.

And the kids. He's getting nothing i i would love to see the stats of normal people divorce versus public proposal divorce or just any flash mob public like yeah but b i would also love to see if you proposed you insisting on a prenup i'd love to see how many how many of them no no no just you personally me insisting on a prenup i'd love to see how many how many of them no no no just you personally me insisting on a prenup yeah yeah you insisting on a prenup nothing your partner being like why she wants to own all the podcasts yeah yeah yeah yeah if you divorce she just wants to be on with me oh that's great we all of a sudden and it's like you're not allowed to like mention anything about it it's just all of a sudden tuning in it's like you're not allowed to mention anything about it. It's just all of a sudden tuning in. It's like, who's this more masculine sounding new girl?

Are you going to get a prenup, Wardy? No. No. No. It would be funny to have someone in comedy who's like, I'll be damned if she's getting her hands on my, have you been paying attention money? I don't want her getting...

I don't want her getting... I don't know if he pays rent every seven weeks. I don't want her getting half of of my tight five Yeah, yeah, yeah I don't want to get in any of that cash I want your bad credit rating Prenups are for people who are already rich Like can you do a prenup being like But what if I get

So I have to believe in myself for a prenup That's cocky That's good though That's cocky Maybe I should That's like putting it out into the universe Then I think if you got rich while you're with them, they can be like, well, I was a part of that.

I helped. I was emotional support. Yeah, I supported you. What about you? You got a prenup? Couples are. They are. No prenup.

As long as they're like, fine, you can go out again. You really are helping. I think anyone in comedy, a couple where one person's in comedy, I think the person not in comedy should be insisting on the prenup. 100%. They're the ones. They're working down not in comedy should be insisting on the prenup. 100%. Yeah, 100%. They're working down at might of 10. Yeah, get a prenup.

Yeah. You're on heaps more money than people in comedy. I don't want you profiting in any way off my normal, not fucked up life. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't want you dragging me down. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You got engaged on the roof of the Marina Bay Sands. I did.

Did you not? I was up there when I was in Singapore and I was thinking about Carl Chandler down on one knee. Yeah. Crying. Yeah.ler down on one knee. Yep. Crying. Yep. That's kind of public. You were in a restaurant in a bar.

Please marry me. Or I'll throw myself off here. Marry me. Was there a bit of applause of onlookers nearby? Not at all. You don't marry me, I will jump off. Did you get down on one knee? You know what? The idea of going...

I got down on two knees. I lay flat. I went prone. I got a nice... We had a nice area. We had this nice little overlook near Falls, near Bright. And it was cold, but I i tricked her i tricked her to come and i was gonna be like hey we have this nice moment i said i was using marry me marry me

oh come on give us our marriage give it to me i'm rich i'm ridiculous isn't it you're gonna be signing a prenup me and you can get some of my yield. But then just like a peloton of cyclists came in at that time and I just thought, oh, no. You want to get married? Oh, yes. Wait, you wanted to get this out before the cyclists saw you? Yeah, I didn't want the cyclists. I'll get bashed by the men in Lycra.

Quick, before they come in the green jersey, I'll get bashed by the men in Lycra. Quick, before they come in the green jersey. Will you marry me? Will you marry me? Come on, bloody cyclist. Got a big problem. Oh, man. Now, good on you.

Good on everyone. Good on you for marrying me. So, yeah, you're on the roof Of the Marina Bay Sands Yeah I'm thinking I get up there In this like You know The best spot in Singapore

This is going to be awesome And it's romantic up there Or whatever But it was like Friday night And it was just pumping It's a club Yeah it's a club And unless you've got like

Unless you've phoned ahead And been like Can we have a Yeah Booked weeks in ahead Table And that of course Did not happen

Yeah So you brought shots and she was like marry me and you were like prove it prove it no it was like I got up there Milan rocked up so you played $10 club entry

I think we had to pay $20 to get up there Friday night so it's really loud. Not only can she not hear what I'm saying, then I'm trying to go down on one knee. Obviously. Yeah. I'm trying to go down on one knee.

Sticky. But it's like a place with the tall tables. Yeah. Oh, yeah. So then no one's sitting down. So you're like under the table. I'm just like lying on the ground, basically. Yeah.

Like, I'm the only one anywhere near to the ground. Right. And it's busy. So there's just one cunt fucking. The DJ hadn't said get down. Yeah, so it's like to everyone else it just looks like I'm upskirting or whatever. It doesn't look like any sort of good moment. And even with my wife, she's like going, what are you doing?

And I try and propose over the top of everyone else. And she's like, is this a joke? And I'm like, oh, this is going well. Now that's what you want to hear, isn't it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Is this's like, is this a joke? And I'm like, oh, this is going well. That's what you want to hear, isn't it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Is this a joke? Is this a joke? This is...

The one time it is not a joke. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And this is the woman who's been saying for five years, why won't you propose to me? Here it fucking is. Yeah. It's not a joke.

Yeah. This is what she wanted. Yeah. Be careful what you wish for. Having to be under the table is just... Yeah. That's brutal. Under the high wanted. Yeah. Be careful what you wish for. Having to be under the table is just... Yeah. Under the high top. Yeah, and like yelling from the ground as well.

Yeah. Trying to get over the top of people while you're crouching down like they do it in the movies. God, and if only she could have seen then into the future. Beautiful child. Yeah. Cheap as shit wedding ring. Yeah. It's still constantly being lost.

Hey, I wish. I wish I still had it. You should have just bought like a suite of them. Yes. Next time you're there, just get like 20. It's actually really hard to buy one washer. I've tried. You have to usually buy 20 washers. I'm going to try and remember.

So I bought it in Phuket. I'm going to go to Phuket later this year. I'm going to try and figure. It was a market by the side of a highway is where i bought it i'm going to try and figure out where that market was i'm going to go back i'm going to buy a whole table full of washers can you get me a tap while you're there i'll get enough wedding rings for all of you i'll have spares for everyone i'm good i don't i'll take one i need one all right all right good good i lost mine a couple of times on the...

Because it's... While filming, because I put it away and then the costumes... Or leave it in a pocket. Because your character wasn't married. Because my character wasn't married. Oh, yes. And you're a very serious actor. Yeah.

Because they were like, is that married? Get a load of Daniel Day-Lewis over here. And then... And so then I'd like call up the costume ladies And be like I've lost it again I lost it like three or four times Hey welcome in The water's fine Well hey while you're there

I got it back though Well when it's a real one When it's a real one Apparently the ladies care a lot Yeah they did They did care a lot While you're in Thailand Can you get me an engagement sprocket

Just ready to go for when I need it You know what I like Can you get me an engagement sprocket just ready to go for when I need it? You know what I like? I like it when guys wear wedding rings in pornos. Like the male actor. The male actor has a wedding ring. God, that's a specific genre. No, but have you ever noticed it?

Never. I'm not looking at the guy's hands in pornos. I've never watched a porno. Do you think that's on purpose because guys watching it can be like, oh, like relate to it more? I don't know. Like I'm married. That's the secret to a good marriage. I don't know.

Because the alternative is a man, a male porn actor, leaving it on deliberately as he's like fucking some young starlet's asshole and going, don't get too attached to this, I'm taken, ladies, all right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Don't think that just because it's in the video that it could happen to you. Yeah, yeah. Off camera, I actually value the bond.

Yeah, this is just a job. I don't think there's going to be any funny business between me and you, all right, woman? I'm fucking up the ass. It's just a job. I'm taken. I brought you a pizza, but that's not me buying you dinner. Yeah.

That is purely for work. This is the character bumming you. Yeah. Not me. I'm off to work. Yeah. This is Daniel Day-Lewis

bumming you. Yeah. Honey, I'm off to work and the wife going, put the ring on. I don't want there to be any funny business. I don't want them to think that they're a chance with you.

Yeah. What would give that impression? The pain inside you? Yeah, no, I can't say I've ever paid too much attention to the hands of the man. She's like, put on the satin boxes so they're not interested anyway. I think the satin boxes are due a comeback, honestly. I don't know if I could handle them. I think I'd feel uncomfortable in them now.

No, I'm never going back. But I'll give it a go for a couple of days. No, you're dreaming. Speaking of weddings, I was... You're a dreamer. I was... For the brief period of time that I had a wedding ring again when it came back to me. We went to the wedding

and I went to the first wedding for a while and it was a wedding where I didn't know anyone. Okay. Literally no one at all. Yeah. So then you get to just,

you know, talk to all these strangers and whatever. Get white girl wasted because there's no accountability. A bit of that, yeah. And then... I find that offensive.

There was someone who worked at an airline at my wife's old business. I was getting married. So there was a lot of people who worked in airlines and people who then moved overseas. A lot of people flying in from overseas and whatever. So I was on a table with a bunch of people that worked in Asia for airlines and stuff like that. And this was the best thing I got out of the wedding is that at at some stage they started talking about, like there was a bunch of these people

that didn't know each other, but they were talking about growing up in Singapore and growing up in Malaysia and stuff like that. And then they started doing like short-cutting stuff and going, oh, you know when this happens and you know when that happens in Malaysia and you know growing up and this happens. And this one bit that took me,

I was like, they go, oh yeah, you know like when blah, blah, blah comes along. Oh yeah, that's so funny. When blah, blah, blah. And I'm like, who's blah, blah, blah? And they go, oh, you know when Hantu T hantu tetik remember you know we'd all be scared of hantu tetik i'm like what do you mean what's that and they go oh don't you haven't you ever heard of hantu tetik i know they go that's uh what would how would i describe that that's like you

know like the boogeyman for you guys i guess or you know ghosts or whatever i'm like but what is it exactly and they go oh it's it's a woman that we're all scared of when we're growing up in Malaysia because she walks around and she's got absolutely massive tits and she squeezes young children to death in her boobs. Like, are you for real? And they're like, yeah, absolutely.

Have you never heard of this? And I get on Google. You've got to watch this on Crunchyroll. It's a real thing. That's what they have. Here's a picture of... So tell the kids this. That's Hantu Tedic right there.

Oh, my God. I mean, how are you going to show the listeners? They can look it up. Squeeze me, mummy. Carl's been looking up the things that like... Those are some engorged nipples. Does she have a wedding ring on? Carl's been looking up the things that cause her to haunt people

and just doing all of them. No! Don't come after me, Hantu Tedic. I'm so scared. I own 17 haunted houses in Malaysia now. Oh, my rich uncle passed away. We have to spend the night in his mansion. He's stealing chupa chups from the local store.

Don't squeeze me. That's why I accidentally lost my wedding ring so Hantu Tedic knows that I'm available. Yeah, I wondered why you'd been teaming up with that talking dog and those teenagers and driving around in a van. Hantu Tedic's just some old dude. Big, big prosthetic.

Big ghost natties. Yeah, so I looked it up And it's the real thing Hantu Tetik And that translates Roughly into Breast ghost Okay

It's from Malaysian folklore Sounds like a character I made up This podcast needs a mascot I wonder if we could Contact the Malaysian government And buy the rights To Hantu Tetik

Sure The big titted ghost mascot Of a little dum-dum club Just so And we can have it like ghostbusters but with the ghost having big old titties with the cross through it oh yeah yeah like kind of stepping out of the who you're gonna call one over the logo who you're gonna call little dum-dum yeah that and then our logo is big instead of the cross it's a big tick

yes we can just make merch of this because it's like a hand to tetic it's just like it's folklore right it's public domain. So we can't get sued by Big Ghost or anything like that. Taylor Swift can release an album called Folklore. You guys can do it. It's like Winnie the Pooh now. It's in public domain. Yeah, yeah.

We don't have to pay to show any ghost tits. That's good. Now, have you looked up? There must be. Hantu Tedik breast ghost is from Malaysian folklore and some sources claim this to be a type of Balinese witch. It is described as a woman with large breasts. So anytime you see a woman down the street now,

you can just... Could be her. You can just shout Hantu Tatic from your car. By the way... Shout at any big-breasted woman, I would say. Just, you know, anything, especially if you work on a construction site, just shout.

Oi, Hantu! No wolf whistling from then on. Hantu! Anything, especially if you work on a construction site, just shout. Oi, hanty! No wolf whistling from then on. Hanty! No, don't say wolf whistling. It's ooooh! I'm scared! I love that this conversation's happening at a wedding as well.

This is just awesome. I assume this is just like an offhand comment that one of them's made. And then all of a sudden you're just like, now hang on. We're all talking about this now. I'm going to need to be, I'm going to need to turn this into a two hour AMA. You're just on your phone for the rest of the wedding. Researching.

Yes. Big cartoons of a big breasted woman. People do get horny at weddings, but Carl was the horniest. That guy's just sitting there looking up hentai the whole time.

Yeah, and then, so the guy's just sitting there looking up hentai the whole time. Yeah, and then... Yeah, so the Malaysian guys are like going, yeah, yeah, we used to... Our mums used to say, you know, get home early and we'd be genuinely running home before it got dark in case we got suffocated to death with big Malaysian breasts. And that's part of the legend is that she kills you by suffocating you in the big pits. Yes, that's part of the, like, that's part of the legend is that she kills you

by suffocating you in the big kids. That's how she kills, that's how she kills kids. That's so good. In between big old gnats. That's way better than the boogeyman.

Yeah. It is described... What's the boogeyman actually do? Yeah, I don't know. Boogeys? Yeah. Just kind of spooks you, right? Yeah, they never describe it.

It doesn't really do anything. It just spooks you, you know. Yeah, he's a spook. Ties his dick around your neck and kills you. It is described as a woman with large breasts. Various sources claim that the breasts are on its back. Most powerful during evening twilight. I guess that's when the bigger the boobs are during twilight.

It preys on children suffocating them. Is twilight dusk? Yeah. Well, that's when kids have to get home. Right. Yeah. So that's Is Twilight dusk? Yeah. Well, that's when kids have to get home. Right. Yeah. So that's coincidental feeding time. Yeah.

It preys on children suffocating them to death by pressing them into her breasts. Not a bad way to go. So that's like on a fandom page. Start doing what I loved. I love this. 13-year-old boys are like, I've had a good run. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I believe we all get reincarnated.

I just hope I come back tomorrow and get killed the same way. She really does have to time it, you know, pretty perfectly because there is like a fine line when you're a young adolescent male of like literally overnight it can be like, oh, girl germs, yucky, get away from me, hand to tetic. And then just overnight the next day like, yes. Yes. Yes.

Yeah, yeah. Oh, you've got hair on your upper lip. Oh, and you're a lot slower running home at twilight tonight. Yeah. That's weird. How do you get your news? If you're looking for news, if you're looking to trustworthy news or if you're looking up something, what's your news source generally?

Fox. Fox. Oh, yeah. You're a fox guy yeah weddings with people i don't know just ask him what's been going on in the world guys not for you specifically about history yeah i heard there's some earthquake somewhere you guys got any info on this anyone is there any tech related news about that or no um this is so i looked it up and so i this is on yahoo news which, you know, I'm fine with because

I still have, I'm still rocking the Yahoo email account. So Yahoo's still okay, isn't it? No. For news? I don't know. For something? I don't think so. No, Yahoo's seven now, isn't it?

They merged seven. Yeah, maybe. I think so. Which is a fantastic channel. But this is my. Oh yeah, great. Beautiful channel. Great slate of programming coming up this year.

Yeah, great planning. Yeah? Yeah. Any, what? Unbelievable. Okay. Any. We slate of programming coming up this year. Yeah, great planning. Yeah? Yeah. Any, what? Unbelievable. Okay. We'll talk about that later, maybe. Featuring any actors without wedding rings, by chance?

Some scenes, yeah. Unrelated, what would it be like if Husey got haunted by Hantu Tedek? Oh, bloody Hantu Tedek! Bloody don't suffocate me in my breast. No, thank you. Bloody dick-tether, Dan. It's the end of Federation. So Yahoo News.

It would be exactly like that. Yahoo News has got a story on it. So that's my story. That proves it's real, hand-to-tether. Because I've got two sources. I've got two credits here. Wedding Table and Yahoo News. No, whatever, the fandom page and this.

This is the headline. This is the sort of headline you get when you go to Yahoo News. Malaysians enraptured by big titty ghost. That's the headline. Enraptured. When's this from? When's this... Last year. A year ago. Two years ago. When's this legend start, by the way? So these people at the wedding

all said that it was prominent when they were kids. Yeah, and the guys, they were about 30, I i think so it must be like the boogeyman where it's just been around for like yeah you know you can't even trace how far back yeah yeah and like like yeah on this topic i actually found google bullying the other day i looked up something it was a disease like it's not a disease but fuck it's hard to get into this but i was listening to a podcast about johnson and johnson were giving teenage into this. But I was listening to a podcast about Johnson & Johnson were giving teenage boys this anti-psychotic drug and it made them grow like breasts, basically.

It was so bad they needed breast reduction. It was like, that's how big these boys' breasts were. Double Ds. And boys! Wow. It's hard not to laugh at. That isn't even the part I found funny. But I couldn't...

Well, he's hand to a boys or a girls name. He could be a teenage boy, yeah. And it was called gynecomastia is the name of the disease, but I kept't well he's hand to a boys or a girls name yeah he could be a teenage boy yeah and it was called gynecomastia is the name of the disease but I kept hearing it going I really want to know more about this so I looked it up

and this is what Google has it has gynecomastia serious illness and it says also known as man boobs yes okay

I was like Google you can't just call them man boobs yeah yeah like these are they're having surgical reduction

I reckon I know a few guys with gynecomastia. Yeah, they're like, it's from antipsychotic drugs, I swear. It's also from poor life choices. A lot of chicken. Imagine looking up menstruation. It's like, bitch on the rags. Did you mean?

Also known as. I mean, that's so harsh giving it the clinic, like the actual official name being such a tongue twister. I've already forgotten it. That's what I do. I don't think I'll ever be able to pronounce it. I'm sorry, sir. You have man boobs.

The only reason I could say it is because I love telling people that story. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna-

Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna-

Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna-

Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna-

Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna-

Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna-

Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna-

Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna- Gyna Up everyone. This ghost is in the news. The titty ghost has been described as an old woman who captures children and suffocates them with her breasts. But here's the update. Sometimes she would disguise herself as an attractive young lady with a big bosom to attract males.

So there you go. She's going deep undercover. Yeah. That's why you have the ring on. I get it. Yeah. So if you may not be in a strip club, you could be in a haunted house. Yeah.

Wow. I wonder if we've... Yeah, we must have listeners that grew up in Malaysia. Yeah, we've got Malaysians. I know one Malaysian friend of the show. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Let's text Ronnie.

Maybe you can email him. I won't. Can you just send a picture of that? The big boob black and white you showed me? Yeah, can you actually... Can you just send that and say, what do you know about this? Can everyone send as many pictures of this to Ronnie as they can? So glad I didn't have to get haunted by a big-titted ghost

in Singapore or Australia. The old Australian people that run television would have ruined. Her big boobs look very sensitive. I have a Ronnie update actually. I asked him to record a voice for my festival show and he did it and he wrote back, hi please find the file in the Dropbox link below.

This was pretty funny but super annoying to try to find time to do. Hollywood hasn't changed him at all. You think people are going to just disappear up their own arses, but nah, he's the same old Ronnie. He's done it again. Well, you send it to him. Everyone that listens to this show, send him pictures of it.

This will help things. Hey, I won't. I won't do it. I wouldn't like to annoy him. He might get scared. Yes. He might get too scared. That might have caused it.

Maybe what's wrong with him has been caused by him being half suffocated. I mean, I imagine we will get a lot of messages from people being like, boys, I can see why you find it funny, but honestly, I hated this week's episode. So traumatising. Triggering. Took me back to growing up and the genuine fear that I had of being smothered to death by those gigantic

breasts terrified and having rush blood rushing to two areas at once passing out yeah i love um i love knowing those kinds of like folkloric things from other parts of the world yeah yeah because to be honest they told me two or three other ones and they were absolutely fucking insane but they were completely overshadowed overshadowed by Hantu's headache once it got to that one. Are you sitting there at the table like taking notes? Yes. There's one in Japan. It's a town in Japan that has the most.

They're like the whole town is haunted. Like the kids think they're going to be eaten around Christmas time. And it's horrifying. I cannot remember the name of it. I hope a listener can. Oh, yeah. It's like really scary. Like the kids won't go outside the house on that day.

They were like... But what happens outside? People dress up as monsters and like they're real. Like we're going to eat you. It's really full on. I don't think Australia has anything. We don't really have anything. We really don't have anything.

Not even just... Not even Australia, but just like general like Western culture. It's like even just the boogeyman is like, what is that? What's he doing? It's so vague. All we have is just the boogeyman is like what is that what's he doing it's so vague there's no like just the occasional pic with someone in blackface or wearing a nazi an arty costume that's that's our folklore that's out there but you don't know but there's a picture of you and dressed as hitler somewhere could happen to any one of us i feel like growing up it was my main fear was like

A prisoner would escape Oh really Like a prisoner would get out And get me That was kind of Honestly Oh wow I still have a fear of that

I still Anytime I stay in like Anytime I stay in like That's so funny It's like You know what I never outgrew Being scared of

Dangerous criminals Like I thought I thought that was just A five year old thing That is so infantile You're a big baby being scared of dangerous criminals. I thought that was just a five-year-old thing. That is so infantile. You're a big baby. No, any time I stay, especially in the country where it's super quiet and you can just hear everything, any noise,

I've fully convinced myself that there's someone. Do you ever look up if there's a local prison? Dangerous criminals are more scared of you than you are of her. They're actually good for your health. They eat all the smaller dangerous criminals. Is that why you're actually in an Airbnb? It looks like you had a fear. I got too scared up in here.

He saw a daddy long legs at the old place and he's moved out. A drunk 18-year-old walk past at 3 a.m. Man, I had to come there last night. I'm quite tired today because my daughter has turned four and now she's smart enough to be scared of stuff. So then last night she just wanted every light in the house on and I'm like, oh, and then I would turn them on because she's scared. You think that's scary?

Wait till you see the electricity bill. Yeah. There you go. Some pretty cool gear. But honey, if it's not dark, then the big-titted ghost is never going to come out and Daddy's had a long day and he needs this. I am doing a festival show.

I'll mention it then. So then I'd turn the lights on and then every, I'd like, oh, give it 10 minutes and then I'll turn up, get up and turn the lights off again

and she'd go, ah, no. I'm like, fuck. So that was like an hour of me trying to turn on. She treats you like a dog.

Yeah, yeah. It's like fucking hell. But then in the end, I was like, that was like an hour me trying to treat you like a dog yeah yeah it's like fucking hell but then in the end i was like i was like okay maybe i can like take this down at the source like i was like okay you want the lights on yes go out to the main yeah yeah it's like i'm like what what are you scared of like what like when the dark comes what what are you scared of and she's like, spiders. And then I'm like thinking I'm fixing it going, you know there's spiders when there's lights on anyway. Like if they're going to get you, they're going to get you.

And it's like, oh, that's probably the wrong thing to say. You know what I would have said? Spiders sleep at night. Oh, yeah. That's another angle. Yeah, see, better father than son. I would have been like, oh, they're tucked up in their little beds and they've got eight socks on.

Have they got eight legs? That's good. So I can make them cute. I'll make a note of that. I'll make a note of that. I'll tell you what I'm scared of. It's not true, but you can tell her later. It's not true.

They actually crawl in your mouth, apparently. I'll tell you what I'm scared of. Social interaction. Oh, yeah. Meeting people out in public, saying the wrong thing freaks me out. You've been self-isolating for years. I have been self-isolating for years. For that reason, I guess, now that you... Oh, yeah. And we kind of stop in the opening, in the door, and they're like, oh, Tommy Dassel, I listen to the podcast. I always see you walking around Fitzroy.

I'll have my headphones in listening to the podcast and I often want to stop you and say hi, but I kind of feel like that's a weird thing to do. By the way, before you tell the scene of this story, save this bit. What a lovely way of fan interaction. I'll tell you my one after you tell me scene of this story, save this bit. What a lovely way of fan interaction. I'll tell you my one after you tell me this. Okay.

And so I go, oh, sure. You know, you don't have to feel weird about that. If you want to stop and say hi and that you like the show, that's completely fine. That's a nice thing to have happen. And they're like, really? You'd be into that? And I'm like, yeah, I'm happy to be stopped wherever,

even just like, you know, even just just like because they were walking into the toilet i was like even just a bloke as he's on his way into the pisser like happy to hear it wherever and they lent in and they went well you know i'm trans and i've only just started transitioning so and i'm like oh yeah and then like everyone because this is like, this toilet is like near the pool table. So heaps of people hear this interaction happen. And then I'm on the spot and I'm like, cool man, well keep listening to the pot

and you use whatever toilet you want. I was just like, oh my God, like in my head, just like, oh, just trying to be like, whatever man, just like say hey whenever you want. And it's like, you still fucking get it dead wrong. Good Lord, what a fuck up. You can't say nothing these days.

That's the way you approach someone. Just sweating my ass off. Bloody can't say nothing. Bloody PC. Elaine's coming in. Just back at the table with my friends being like, did I fuck that completely? What do you think?

So what did you say? Did you say even, did you say a bloke going to the pisser? What did you say? I said something like, yeah, happy to even just have an interaction like this, like just a guy leaning out of the men's room to say g'day. I mean, that's fine. What did you even say? I just started transitioning.

I don't think you need to feel bad about that. It would be bad if you were like, I don't believe in that. Yeah. That would be bad. I will be taking my copy of The Prisoner of Azkaban and bidding you adieu. Are you? Yeah. No.

Why are you going in there? Is it to attack somebody? That would have been bad. I think what you did is fine. They were just like, they're probably just used to communicating it because it's a new thing. Well, but this is what I mean about interacting. Next time it happens, you can go, oh, cool.

Hit me up when you're finished and you've got a big old pair of Hantu TEDx hanging on you. Don't say that. I mean, but this is what I mean. This is why it's like a fear. It's like, you know, an interaction like that where I'm just overthinking every part of it. By the way, I was at the cinema the other day

and the cinema down the road here, they're now, all their bathrooms are gender neutral. And I walked in and they've got like, they've got one of the like, They've both gone mad in my opinion. They've got the single, they've got like the single urinal, like they're not the like big wall.

So chicks can use it as well. Well, I don't know it's like gender free right but then one of them's like it's got like a garbage bag taped over it

and they've written like out of order on it and I did think about just like the worst like you know right winger walking in they see gender neutral

bathroom on the door and then they walk in and one of the urinals is out of commission and just being like fuck it begins you know what I mean like just getting I can is out of commission and just being like, fuck, it begins. You know what I mean? I can't piss on a wall.

He's just getting so worked up about it. Pissing straight onto the bag. Doesn't take long, does it? Birthday came from my fucking piss wall and I didn't say anything. They're making us sit down to piss. They're transitioning me right now. I'm turning into a woman. I'm pissing while I'm sitting down.

There was like a hole that had been poked in the garbage bag thing so someone could still use it. It's like, I'll be damned if I'm going in your stall. It's like... I drove up to Sydney last year

and I saw my first ever like truck stop glory hole. Oh, yeah. It was fucking... What was his name? Did it work? It had to feel. We got...

Me and Greg got so excited, we forgot to take photos, and then we were driving off, we go, we can't believe we didn't take photos. We were just so excited. We were just hooting and hollering and... Getting sucked off. Yipping and yeeing, going, look at this, looking through it, saying hello to each other.

It's appropriate to take photos. Putting my dick through it, Greg sucking it, I suck at Greg, you know, just anyway. There we go. Oh, that's great. So you're on a road trip with your boy, and then you see a glory hole, and you go, oh, this is great. You could go on the other side of this and suck me off.

You don't know me. They do it independently. They go, Greg, can you just go and get me a bottle of Coke around the corner? Right, and he had to put my dick through the hole. And then Greg's like, while he thinks I'm going to get him a Coke, I'm going to get sucked off by some stranger on the other side. Greg's doing this to camera like Malcolm in the Middle style. And we drove back and we tried to find it,

but we wasted a lot of time trying to find it. Oh, well, I guess we'll just get a motel room. I guess we'll just have to settle for sucking each other off on the open road the way God intended. I guess we could cut a hole in a plastic bag. That night by the campfire, I've got to tell you, this funny thing happened today. I got my dick sucked back at the truck stop.

Really? Because I sucked a dick. Because I sucked someone's dick. That is a mad coincidence. What are the odds? I've got goosebumps. All right, what was your interaction with a listener coming in or out of a men's room?

Not quite the same as that beautiful introduction that they've done to you. What I copped was three of us having a drink and a woman barging in, putting a phone in front of my face with hers, doing a selfie, and then going, can I get a fucking picture with Duck Sandwich? Not even my name. Didn't even use my name. That's great.

I want a picture with Duck Sandwich, which is very intimately aware of my material. And I swear, didn't remember my name. Remember Duck Sandwich, you didn't remember my name. Yeah, that's awesome. You're like Jamiroquai. People think that's the name of the band. Oh, yes. That's the name of the guy.

Yeah. I'm like Debra Harry. I'm a real, I'm a deep, I'm a true fan. You know, I'm like, I'm not a fly-by-nighter. I'm always having to correct people online. Actually, Duck Sandwich is just the name of one of the bits. His name is Carl Chandler. Can I get a picture with achy, breaky heart?

Yeah, no worries. Do you ever get funny, lady? No one says funny, lady. Some, like, young men will just go and shout at me, Aunty Donna. Oh, that's good. Yeah, no, I've been in, no, I've been in their stuff. You're on betting ads too.

Do you ever get big betting fans? Hey, two to one. Actually, weirdly enough. Oi, sports bet. Weirdly enough, I was in the Gold Coast doing gigs last year and I was at the Avenue in Surfers, which those gigs are fine except for the Avenue at Surfers. Beautiful establishment.

Gold Coast is the home of the arts. And I had these people, they were just like totally outside of my usual demographic. And it was like the older sort of looks like they kind of live or holiday in the Gold Coast in Surfers Paradise. And they were like, you're fucking funny. We came here for you. And I'm like, oh, how did, what? You know I'm not Carl Barron? And they were like, yeah, it's sports bit, man.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Wow. So it's actually, it's translating into ticket sales. I guess so. That's so good. That's brutal. It's absolutely brutal.

How did they find out your name? Was it in the ad? I don't know. No. Wow. It guess so. Incredible. That's brutal. That's awesome. How did they find out your name? Was it in the ad? I don't know. No, it's not. And what's your... So they saw you on a poster and they go, that's the guy from the sports... And can I just say that that gig was awful

and I bombed for 20 minutes. What's the funniest bit you do in a sports film? I don't honestly know. I could not tell you. And they're not that fun. I don't care if Sportsbet cancel me. Never. I've seen them and they're not that fun. I don't care if Sportsbet cancel me. Never have me on. That's really hurtful.

No, your performance is amazing. Thank you. It's not as funny as your stage. I think you do some of your better work elsewhere. That's what I'm trying to say. Outside of the Sportsbet universe, I think you do your better work. There's heaps about you that's not funny And those ads just happen to be one of them The SBU is one

Just a part of it The Sportsbet universe Who is it to you, Zave? Horses Horses Muda Mick Molloy Ruining families

Someone that sounds like Mick Molloy Probably Dave O'Neill I think Oh no He's in the He's in the other He's on What's the other

Betting company Oh Ladbrokes Ladbrokes He's Ladbrokes Oh is he Ladbrokes He's Ladbrokes Oh wow Wow

So I guess they're like The DC Yeah Yeah He's the suicide squad Of betting ads Alright That's all the people

That bet Yeah I was gonna say Suicide squad Yeah betting ads. That's all the people that bet. Yeah, I was going to say. Suicide squad. That's the fans of Suicide Squad. They're just the gambling addicts. Thanks to the big fans of yours that don't own a house anymore. That's the Suicide Squad. All right, we'd better wrap it up there for another week

on the Little Dumb Dumb Club. Ben Russell, Alex Ward, thank you for joining us. Thank you. Ward, you've got a solo show. Yeah, I'm going to promote it right now. Do it, please. Full month at Comedy Republic, 23 shows, so please come. It's Melbourne Comedy Festival and it's called?

It's called Saving for a Jetpack. You'll get it later. And then I kept wondering, why are there children coming to my show? And then I have bits about monkeys jacking off. So it was quite tense. Educational. But yeah, come along.

So far, Perth liked it. Kids love comedy. If Perth liked it, anyone will like it. Cool. Go check that out. Check it out. And Ben Russell. I've got a sketch show coming out on Channel 7.

TV. On the 28th. So next Tuesday Tuesday this Tuesday it'll be out maybe you'll be able once this episode comes out you'll be able to access it

I'm sure Tuesday 7 plus Channel 7 I think it's on 7.30 7 prime time on Tuesday what's the name of it

it's called We Interrupt This Broadcast so it's a big sketch show in the classic Australian Channel 7 mould of... It mocks. It mocks, doesn't it?

It takes the absolute mick. Yeah, we take the absolute mickey out of it, so be careful. Can I say this? Can I give this as a bit of sizzle for listeners of the show that they'll appreciate? I was texting you at the end of last year, and I knew that it was your last day of filming, or thereabouts. And I was like, oh, are you done yet? Are you on your way back home?

Because you were filming in Sydney. And you were like, I'm just doing my last shoot of the sketch, and then you sent me a video of you dressed up as Hughsey. I do do a Hughsey. You've had a little taste already. And it's the only one that I was... So when are you going to set to film this sketch? It's the only one. You've had a little taste already. And it's the only one that I was. So when are you going to set to film this sketch? It's the only one that I was nervous about doing.

Yeah. Because, you know, but he has seen, I remember doing a live dum-dum. Yeah. And I did it in front of him. And he was like, that's actually one of the better ones that I've heard. Oh, great. So I hope that he'll be cool with it. Does he know that there's a lot of him in this show?

There's not actually a lot of him. We just kind of did one thing that he's in. I don't want to give away too much. Okay. I'm keen to see it. No, there's not as much as there once was a lot. I did hear, can I tell this? And it kind of got pared back because I think we ran out of time.

Can I tell you a thing that I heard about that I don't believe ever made it out of the writer's room? Yep. That you were going to do a Beatles get back style of Hughsey cooking up snakes alive. That never made it, but fuck, I wish it had. I didn't hear about that one. That's fucking funny, man. That sketch would have been just like that bit

where Paul is inventing get back in front of the other guy. So Hughsey's just doing that in front of Peter Burner or in front of... He's doing it in the glass house. It's in the glass house studios. He's like, Corinne, come over here. Corinne, come over here. And then he goes up on the roof of the ABC and delivers it. I bought a bag of Snakes Alive and what happened?

I open them, I start eating them. Snakes alive and they open up the bag. Open up a bag of snakes alive. They bite me. Husey at the grand piano. When I open a packet of snakes alive, they are all dead to me. They all said, hey, I'm dead. Open up a bag of snakes alive.

Snakes alive. They're all dead. I open up some jubes. I open up some chickos. Oh, God. Corinne, give me a hand here. Well, season two, you got this one ready to go. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Look out. It's already written. It's already written. It writes itself. Do that verbatim. Just jump between all those ideas. Strip the audio off this and just act it out. Exactly.

Alright guys, well check that out, Channel 7. Check out that sketch that did happen. Also I've got an improv show coming next week as well. I don't know when this will come out.

Monthly on Mondays, isn't it? Yeah, last Monday of the month. Cool. I did it once. It was really fun. I want to get both of you on. We'll do it. It's an improv show with comedians.

And it's called Teaching Your Doctor Read. Guess what? Turns out improv, easy. Easy. Oh, really? I knew it. I would love to get both of you on. I don't know.

This is all scripted for us. We're reading lines. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So we haven't done stuff like that. No, I got the script before. We were writing this up for nine months. Yeah, I've memorized it. It's always a relief when we finally get it.

I can memorise things. Unlike a certain other playwright. Thanks for listening, guys, and we'll see you next time. See you, mates. And they've done it again. They have. Bernard. I have a sore little toe. Saint Bernard. And they've done it again They have Bernard With a sore little toe

Saint Bernard He's booted the ball out into the snow And he's had to Give himself a little barrel of whiskey To keep himself warm As he's gone out to try and find that ball Are they still out there? I don't know

The dogs with the barrel of whiskey? I don't know Are they? I mean Probably an app for that now They're out there in the Warner Brothers cartoons I don't know if they dogs with the barrel of whiskey? I don't know. Are they, I mean, I think they're on... Probably an app for that now. They're out there in the Warner Brothers cartoons. I don't know if they're out there in real life. Yeah.

What about the little tap dancing frogs? Oh, yeah. Are they still out there? Are cats still getting buckets of white paint poured on their back and people think they're skunks? Is that still happening? I think I'm going to go with my dad after the comedy festival. I don't know if you've seen ads for this.

There's a Looney Tunes Melbourne Symphony Orchestra show. So it's like the old cartoons with the orchestra playing the score. The work of Carl Stalling. That's the composer. That's the original composer, right. The classic Looney Tunes. I just got a targeted ad for it and it was one of those rare ones where you're like, I mean, you've picked this beautifully because I'm going to buy a ticket to this.

Sure. This is right. Those cartoons are great. It is. If you, I had a best of Carl Stalling CD once because it is, you take away the visuals. It's great music. Yeah. And just getting to see those old cartoons with an audience up on a big screen would be fun.

Yeah, sure. Except I always hated the, I mean, look, call me an ally if you want. I always hated the Pepe Le Pew cartoons. I don't think they're getting in the mix. No. I think it's all the like, what are the big, like the barber one, the Bugs Bunny is the barber. Yeah.

That one's in the mix. Oh, okay. The ones that have like the classics, the really classics. The ones where you can, what can't you do anymore? Pepe Le Pew's cancelled. Pepe Le Pew's cancelled. Speedy Gonzalez. Oh, yeah.

I don't know if he's getting a big run. Oh, yeah. I haven't heard of him for a while. What about Bugs Bunny dressing up as a woman? That's all right. That's okay? Yeah. That's funny, I guess, isn't it?

That's more okay than ever. That's sexy. Okay. All right. Yeah, okay. That's, in fact, Bugs Bunny's no longer allowed. It's just Bugs Bunny dressed up as a woman. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Actual Bugs cancelled, but Bugs-et. Yeah, okay. That's in fact Bugs Bunny's no longer allowed. It's just Bugs Bunny dressed up as a woman. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Actual Bugs cancelled, but Bugs-et. Yeah, yeah. A bit more diversity that way. Yeah, exactly. Okay. Yeah, that's good. Like we said up the top, we've got the live shows coming up. Adelaide, March the 11th, 2.30pm at the Rhino Room.

And if you're in Adelaide, I'm there very soon in about a week's time, Feb 28 until March 4. Would be great to see some awareys in there, especially that opening night, Feb 28. Got a reviewer in, night one, which is what you want when you've got a very tech heavy show. You're allowing the reviewers back in? It's coming back. Yeah, I've never not let them in. I thought you had. You told me you had. You didn't let them in. I got a request once and I said no. But apart from that, I'm like, I've never not let him in. I thought you had. You told me you had. You didn't let him in. I got a request once and I said no.

Okay. But apart from that, I'm like, I don't care. Okay. Although, yeah, I mean, yeah, night one when you get a lot of tech in the show. So if you're looking for a night to come, I would love some friendly faces in for that particular one. I don't. I mean, I don't like reviewers.

You know, just everyone's got to put their phone in the satchels and stuff. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Just so I can say as many N-words as I want and no record of it. It's pretty sweet. That's cool. Other than people's memories, but then it's your word against theirs. Exactly.

I'm just constantly in court, but I always get off. I don't let people bring phones into the gigs, but I allow every audience member to bring one sketch artist with them. Right. As long as they pay for the seat, they can have the person sitting there with the big board just drawing me doing my act. Instead of having the person doing sign language and stuff,

I have a courtroom artist on stage that's drawing the audience. So if anyone dobs on me for saying the N-word, I know where to find them. Yeah, you've got an exact record. I've got a picture of them. You've got a good picture of them. I don't know why I don't take a photo, but still, it's cool to have drawings. And then we've got the month of Saturdays in Melbourne.

April 1, April 8, April 15, April 22. What about this, Tommy? I'll debut this idea on you without having run it beforehand. First live show in Melbourne, April 1, we do The Yarn. The first one. What do you think? Just to give people a heads up. So if they're coming, if they've listened to the episode a couple of weeks ago,

we're going to do a mini pilot of our TV show idea called The Yarn where it's going to be like The Voice but it's with stories. I'd love more time to source the spinning chairs, but sure. Yeah. Well, if you think mid-festival you've got time to be sourcing spinning chairs, sure. True, true. I reckon that's when we do it. So people have got time to get their shit together.

We'll have someone checking in with you before the show. We'll have a little audition process maybe, a little producer. So if you're thinking, if you've got a story

on you like that, if you want to get judged by us and guests, that's the one. April 1. Okay. Saturday, April 1. 4.30.

Yeah. Yeah. So if you're doing that, get in early. Okay. Saturday, April 1. 4.30. Yeah. Yeah. So if you're doing that, get in early. Yep. Get in nice and early so your stories can get vetted. Who's this producer that's vetting the stories? Look, we've got plenty of time to figure that one out. And we'll have prizes.

Yeah. We'll have prizes. We'll have prizes. Yep. And, yeah. Anyway. So put that in your diary. Yep.

Yep. Along with all the shows. I might just try and solicit some in Rundle Mall while I'm in Adelaide. Solicit some stories. Just set up a little booth. Put some chairs. You know, like just sit there, little booth set up. Have you got a story?

All right. Come and tell me. That's good. Like instead of you, like the opposite of stand up. Instead of like pay me and I'll tell you some stuff. You pay me and you can tell me some stuff. Yeah. Well, like we've said, we still need to we've got that's the like the debut episode of the yarn but we still do need some version of our us going to shopping centers

and just the open cattle call style audition process yeah okay well that's the ever that's before the gig isn't it isn't that what it is yeah okay yeah that's before the gig it's gonna have to be in the venue though is? Yeah, okay. Yeah. That's before the gig. It's going to have to be in the venue, though, because of time. I'd love it to be out at, like, Chadston or something. Yeah. No, we can't do that. We can't do that. This is what it's going to be. I don't think they really do that anymore in any show.

Like, the whole thing of, like, that's where they would do it was in the shopping centre. Yeah. Like, they're not sitting up for maths just outside, like, bed, bath and table at Chadston being like, hey, do you want to fuck someone on TV? Sign up here. We're going to have to get a look at your dick. We're going to have to ascertain that you truly hate women. We'll do an interview with you in the food court.

And then, hey, if we like what we see, you can be on the show. Yeah. Yeah. Well, we'll ask all those questions in the auditions for the yarns. Yeah. Absolutely. In a Morris uh when it's back over comedy festival coming up very exciting yeah uh that's a good stuff on yeah so um come

along to that everyone um shows are all selling well adelaide was selling really well and then it just became a bit adelaide so adelaide you've got about three weeks so get your get your fucking skates on or we're gonna have to start complaining again what else we got nothing else to report I think we can let's just get into this yeah let's just get

into this it's been a long long day so far yes and we've got more episodes to do in advance because you're going to go to Adelaide so

we're doing a few episodes in a row this week so let's save our tonsils for that thank you very much to everyone who subscribes to

patreon.com slash little dumb dumb club. You can go to exactly that site or you can be a lazy little poo and you can go to our website and click the link off that. While you're at the website, you can have a look at the merch that we've got. We've got t-shirts. We've got little albums that you can download, pay and download on our, if you're a late comer to the show and you've never heard our stand-up before, you can buy little albums off the website.

You can buy our T-shirts, the logos, like the normal logo. You can get the I'm Aware of Little Dumb and Club shirt. You can get the I've Been Maligned T-shirt. What else can you buy on our website? That's about it. Bitcoin? Bitcoin, yeah, Dumb Dumb Coin. You can get that.

And you can sign up to patreon.com slash little dumbdumbclub where you get bonus episodes every week. You get a nice warm feeling inside you for supporting the arts or whatever it is we do. Yeah, a couple of little 15, 20 minutes twice a week. Really good for when you run out of your fix. For you people that we hear from all the time that you say, oh, we just found your podcast and I'm getting through it at the moment. moment and i've got all through them it's like well you know what if you

haven't signed up to patreon you've you've missed out on about 250 yep little episodes and you you said before that like support the arts or whatever this is you might not think this is the arts and that's fair enough but uh for example tonight i'm gonna go see the band future islands uh you know i just mentioned before i might go see the Melbourne Symphony Orchestra playing Bugs Bunny. So you might not think that we're the arts. You're supporting the arts. I'm taking that money and then I'm giving it.

I'm spending it on going to the arts. Trickle down economics. Yeah, exactly. The arts is being supported in some way. Don't you worry about that. I'm, yeah, going to the $2 peeps tonight as well. So, yeah, so the same deal. That's the art.

Yeah. That's an art. There's an art to that. Yeah, absolutely. I couldn't do it. Yeah. I'm not artistic enough to open my flaps in that way. I'm one of the blokes on the job site, reckon I've got a good pair of tits, but I could

never do what you girls do. Thank you to everyone who subscribes. Let's be specific this week and thank a bunch of people we've never thanked before. Sure. Well, I'll believe it when I see it, given your track record. I did a mini-check.

I think we're in the all clear. I think we're okay. All right, let's crack it off with number one, cab off the rank this week. Thank you very much to Patreon subscriber Sebastian Roger. Okay. Yeah. Doesn't ring a bell.

What would you go with? Would you prefer to be called, the timeless question, would you rather be called Sebastian Roger or Roger Sebastian? Oh, fuck, that's a great question. I know what I'd prefer. Which one? Roger Sebastian. I don't think Roger's the, I'm a big fan of the film Who Framed Roger Sebastian. I don't think Roger's the...

I'm a big fan of the film Who Framed Roger Rabbit. So, you know, that's kind of winning out for me. Right. I think Roger would be cool. But I do, I mean... So you think it would be cool to be named after Roger Rabbit? A cartoon rabbit. Yes.

Right. But I had a good friend at school called Sam. In the animated... Sorry to interrupt. But in the animated world, do you think there's any sort of tension between the people, like Roger Rabbit, Bugs Bunny? They've got surnames.

Why is one of them Bunny and one of them Rabbit? What's going on there? Is there only two families in the entire animated rabbit world? Well, and Bugs Bunny, he's in that film he's got a little cameo in it so i wonder if they ever talked about that on set yeah yeah i wonder i wonder if that's the like does everyone in the rabbit world in in cartoons have to be have to have a surname saying what species what animal yeah yeah and if so are they the only two or is there another one where it's like, I don't know,

Joey Cottontail Animal? Well, my issue is with something like Peppa Pig. Or Gary Hare. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah? Well, my issue is with something like Peppa Pig where it's hearkening back to that but then you compare the style of illustration of Peppa Pig to a Bugs Bunny. Yeah.

Light years apart. Yeah. How dare they even, you know, try and evoke the same kind of thing? Hmm. Yeah, I just would really like to, if anyone's got the answer, we can get to the bottom of how many surnames

are there in the animated rabbit world? I'd like to know. And what's the relationship between the families? Is it like mafia? Are they warring? Do they all get along? Well, Roger's a weird one because he kind of only exists in that film he's never really been given license to stretch out and do anything else

he's never done is roger rabbit never appeared in anything else since then he so you know you've seen that film right have you seen that back in the day yeah so he in that film he's like a famous cartoon character that just existed for that film. And then since then, they've done one or two other things for him. They made a series of three kind of new little shorts in that style of old animated thing that I think were on before a couple of different movies or whatever. But apart from that, not really. They've never had a series of different movies or whatever. But apart from that, like, not really.

They've never had, like, a series or a show or anything. I just searched Roger Rabbit on IMDb. Yep. And, yeah, there's not much. They're not even counting him as a real person. He doesn't really live on in any way. No. Even though, like, if you go into, like, a Disney store

or at, like, Disney World or whatever, you'll see a bit of Roger here and there. They're giving him a little bit of a run because he's a cool looking character. He's like a, you know, he's very aesthetically pleasing. But it is, yeah, it is weird that they've never done much more with him. So in 1996, there was a 30-minute show called, 25-minute show called It's Roger Rabbit. It's Roger Rabbit. Hmm.

There's a Who Framed Roger Rabbit 2, which obviously hasn't been made yet. Yeah. It says it's in development, but I think that's wishful thinking. Yeah, I think it's been quite unquote in development since after the first one came out. Right. Yeah, he doesn't really pop up anywhere, does he?

Yeah. Shame. Yeah. A damn shame. Yeah. Great film. In my top five, I reckon. Is it? Yeah, he doesn't really pop up anywhere, does he? Yeah. Shame. Yeah. A damn shame. Yeah. Great film. In my top five, I reckon.

Is it? Yeah, I love it. Never seen it outside of being a kid. I reckon give it another go. Okay.

It's good. It's like a noir detective story with some funny, stupid shit in it. Maybe Blanket would like to have a look. Yeah, maybe.

She watches some grown-up-y sort of stuff nowadays. It's pretty fucked up at the end. Right. Like the Christopher Lloyd character. Oh, I remember that.

How his fucking face melts off and he's like a cartoon under his skin. That's right. It's pretty scary stuff. I remember that. And he's got that acid that he dips the cartoon characters in and kill them. Yes. Spoilers. Spoilers for a film from 1986.

Yes. But yeah, no, I have to answer the question. I guess I would rather be Sebastian Roger. Okay. Sebi Rog. That's what divides us. Roger Sebastian. I reckon that sounds cool.

Sebastian Roger. It's fine. It's still pretty good. Yeah. But I don't know. Something about Roger. It is a good name. know Roger It is a good name Yeah

It's a good name That was a James Bond Not one of the best ones But Yeah It's pretty good But so is Daniel Yeah

I mean Although when you think about it It's like this cool guy And people call him Bond That sounds cool But it's like His name's James Yeah

That's not that cool of a name. James? We had one of the biggest bogans in Maribor's name was Jamie Bond. And it was like, oh, James Bond. And it was like, you couldn't be further away from James Bond. Yeah. All right. Well, thanks, Sebastian Roger.

I hope we cleared up. If your name is good or not I mean I decided It was upside down It was the wrong way around Yeah Thank you very much to Patience Subscriber Pat Croc Now would you rather be Pat Croc or Croc Pat?

I I'm going to plead the fifth No I'm going to say I would rather be neither You wouldn't like to be Man having the name Croc is pretty cool You think so?

How's he spelling that? C-R-O-C-K, as in croc of shit. Oh, yeah, okay, not so much. I was thinking C-R-O-C. Just straight up like a crocodile. No. I remember, you know, we've talked about this. Learning about the world through media, through TV,

through comic books and stuff like that. Learning about the world through media, through TV, through comic books and stuff like that. Learning about the world through Mad Magazine. I remember being very little and reading a movie parody of Apocalypse Now and not knowing even what the original movie was, but the name of it and the name of the movie parody was A Croc of Shit Now. But they censored that. Oh, man, they're good. Yeah.

They censored that. And I just didn't understand what it was. I'm like, not only do I not know the source material, I don't understand what the parody words were meaning either. Yeah, and I think if you're having to censor it, it's like, well, that tells you everything you need to know. Have another go at it, boys. It is.

Look, I like it. A crock of shit now. I don't know if it's right for the Mad Magazine audience, which I presume are mainly 11-year-olds or something. Yeah. Yeah, we are. What do you call us? We're dum-dum.

When you get a little bit old, too old for Mad Magazine, but not that much older. Yeah. Then you're sort of promoted to us. Where are your 16-year-olds? Yeah. God, even that, probably a bit old. Yeah. 14.

Yeah. That's a great feeling, a great idea to think that we're the audio Mad Magazine. We should do a movie parody every week. Yeah. Just whatever's out. Yeah. We take a swipe at our... What would we do right now?

Dumb Dumb takes on... What's just come out? Oh, Magic Mike, The Last Dance. Okay. What would we call it? Magic Open Mike, The Last Prance. And then we just have Kappa with his pants off. There we go.

There you go. That's something. You you're welcome everyone the new mad magazine that's us um croc yeah so croc i don't know what what does croc mean i'm looking it up now that's it croc of shit it must be uh yeah i don't know some sort of is a. Some sort of receptacle. Yeah, okay. Crockery. No, no. Crockery is like... What's crockery? Well, crockery is like a container.

Is it? Crock of shit. Something... What is a crock in slang? Well, now they're saying, what is a crock? A crock means nonsense. Well, how can you have a nonsense of shit? Yeah, saying the shit, that's like pretty unnecessary.

If you're already saying it's nonsense. It's nonsense shit. Just say it's shit. Yeah. Not getting any clear answers. No, it's just doubling up. I think this is silly. What does crock mean?

Maybe Mad Magazine invented the phrase with that parody. Yeah, yeah. Because a crock now, it's like, oh, fuck. We'll say, okay, right. Crocks, I'm finding crocks, they're like old containers. So that's what that means. Yeah. A container of shit.

So when you're saying it's a crock, that you mean you're saying, oh, that's shit. But when you're saying a crock of shit, you're saying a container of shit. That's But when you're saying a crock of shit, you're saying a container of shit. That's a weird double meaning. But surely, isn't it just... I just always assumed it was shortened. If you're saying, oh, that's a crock.

You're still saying it's a crock of shit. You're just not... You know what I mean? I agree. Yeah. I agree, but this is... Yeah, I don't know. I don't think the people...

I don't think the people in Macquarie and Oxford have really thought this through. Yeah, this wasn't like the word of the year. No. Whatever year, Mad Magazine, Ticket Parody. Croc was the word of the year in 1977. Well, I mean, it's pretty stupid ones now when they come out and they go, oh, the word of the year is flossing or whatever.

Yeah. It's TikTok. Yeah, it is. When are you getting on TikTok,mmy i've thought about it i just don't know what i would do on there i'm not i don't uh i don't really engage with it so i don't fully know what people do there right my girlfriend is on it a fair bit um but just watching or just watching yeah just watching she'll show me stuff that she thinks are funny but it's just like people doing random dances or like videos of dogs where it's like

well that i wouldn't be doing that right in terms of trying to make comedy on there i don't really know what my angle would be don't you just put your stand-up on there or yeah yeah but i feel like even that like if you want results you got to be doing the actual, like, yeah. You've only got so much stand-up that's filmed well that you can put on there. Yeah. I feel like you've got to be doing the stuff where you're, like, every day doing something where you're, like, now I'm reviewing this fucking sausage roll or whatever. Right.

You're, um, Baby Daslo, Goo Goo Gaga, shit my pants again. Yeah. And back on it tomorrow. Yeah. Goo Goo Gaga did wee in my pants. Yep. Yeah. And back on it tomorrow. Yeah. Goo Goo Gaga did We In My Pants. Yep. Yeah. Fuck, we've nearly got a whole week.

Baby Daslo. I just hire you to write TikToks for me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'd like that. Fuck, I'd love that. I'd love an out there showbiz job. This is what I might do this year, speaking as you were earlier of our albums that are on our website

Our Dum Dum website I want to film a special And this is the idea that I have for the set up of a special And no one steal this okay Okay Set up It's at a wedding So I have the whole audience

Like I hire a venue Have all the audience in tuxes and everything And you see the ceremony and then it's the reception and it's basically the stand-up special is me as the best man doing a best man speech and you have a thing filmed before it where it's like i'm in the bathroom and i'm like talking to someone like man i'm really nervous about my speech and they're like man you know you do you do comedy you public speak yeah just tell a little joke at the start to get them on side and then you'll be fine.

And then it's just me looking in the mirror going, yeah, tell them a joke. And then it's like the whole – and then it's like just an hour of my material. Yeah. And you have like cutaways of people in the room, like the bride and the groom, increasingly just getting more and more frustrated

at just like how fucking long is this going for and then you'd have like i do like the closer and then it's me going like oh anyway so yeah i remember when bill introduced me to sandra for the first time then just like hard cut out right right yeah i like it i like it i do i like the thing of going all the effort of like anyone who's coming to this taping, you've got to wear a tux. Just making the whole audience go with this theme for me. I like the opportunity for gags of people being sick of it going for so long. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Where like the bride's cutting her own wedding cake.

It cuts back to her. That's about 15 minutes in, 40 minutes in. She's eaten half of it. She's got wedding cake all over her mouth waiting for you yeah i think there's a lot of i think it i think it would look cool i think it's funny um i also think what's nice about it is like then when i just take little isolated bits of it to put on instagram or tiktok or whatever it's just like why is this guy in a tux yeah yeah like out of context it's just making no sense and then just like yeah the is this guy in a tux? Yeah, yeah. Like out of context, it's just making no sense.

Yeah, yeah. And then just like, yeah, the special Tommy Dasolo, the best man. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, like, it's just... It's a lot of effort to go to. And also the fact of like hiring somewhere that could be a wedding venue, having the audience sit all like that, all in tuxes.

It's like, it's really not the best setup for a gig. No. I'm really shooting myself in the foot. Yeah. I like it. Yeah, I think it could look – I think it would be a lot of fucking hassle, but I think it would look cool. It hasn't been done.

That's a good thing. Well, it made you yawn, so now I'm off it. I'm tired. My child kept me up last night, so she... Did we talk about it on the normal app? I can't remember. Oh, the lights? Was that a bonus?

The lights? Is that normal app or bonus? Normal app. Normal app. Okay, good. Yeah, the lights. Fuck. Just trying to go to sleep with the lights on, basically.

She was doing a Rihanna. What's that mean? She wanted all of the lights. It's a song she sings. Okay. Good Lord. Don't know it. Well, thanks.

Thanks, Croc. Croc. Thank you very much to Patreon subscriber Jamie Coe. Coe. C-O-E. So it's not Jamie Company. No. Short for.

Damn. It's not CO full stop. No. it's not Jamie Company. No. Short for. Damn. It's not C-O full stop? No. That would have been good. Jamie. You want to be an and co, don't you? Huh? You want to be an and co, don't you?

I do. Or just everyone does. Well, just in general. That's a good Carl Chandler and co. Yeah. It's good. It's a neat little. And company.

Neat little name. Jamie and co. And company. Neat little name. Jamie and Co. The plumber that's come in to do the whole bathroom of the house that we've been temporarily booted out of. Yes. His plumbing business, just his name.

Yep. And all his boys that came in with him on the first day. It's like they've all been made to wear polo shirts with just this cunt's name on them. Yep. And I kind of love it. It's like not even coming up with like a, you not a like creative name for the company yeah there's just something funny about making someone another human being wear a shirt with your name i think it's good

this is the fucking uniform i think it's good especially when the company like the person's got a bit of a shit name yeah yeah come on man this is your chance to you know not have a shit name. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Come on, man. This is your chance to not have a shit name for once. Just make up a funny name. Make up something else. Yeah, I mean, if your name was like Patrick Lumming. Yeah. And you're going like P. Lumming Plumbing. You'd be like, you know what, man?

Right on. Put that on the polo shirt. I buy it. Yeah. But yeah. It's your chance to get out finally but anyway some people fucking done i don't know man people are people are fucking idiots i also just do love the thing of like yeah the business owner it's like yeah you're going in you see it

in like so many jobs where it's like yeah you're going around and you're like cleaning people's shit out of their toilet but you gotta've got to have that uniform on. And it's like there's just something about being, you know, you can never escape the uniform. There's always going to be someone out there making you wear something that you don't want to wear. It's like, can't I just wear whatever I fuck? Like, why does it matter? Yeah, but I, you know, if someone's poking around your dunny and they're just wearing Crocs and stubbies and a singlet, it's like, I don't know. It's like, what the fuck are you doing in here?

Yeah, sure. I'm a bit like, oh, yeah, I guess this is meant to be happening. Yeah, I guess. I mean, when they're on the doorstep, sure. But I don't know. There also is an element of it that it's like, it seems to me like one of those jobs where you're like, nah, man, having to put a suit and tie on every day. You know, being told how to dress, fuck that. And then it's like, you still have someone going like, no, you have to wear the requirement

blue polo shirt. Do you really want to be wearing your own clothes when you're cleaning out someone else's fucking done? Yeah, that's true. Yeah. That's fair. It's like, did you ever have that thing at school where you got to a point at school where you didn't have to wear a uniform every day?

No. Oh, you never did that? No. We got to a point where that, it must've been year 11, I think. And then it was like, oh, we don't have to wear a uniform every day no oh you never did that no we got to a point where that must have been year 11 i think and then it was like oh we don't have to wear a uniform anymore but then all of a sudden you you're a whatever it is 15 14 15 year old kid that's then like oh fuck what am i gonna wear every day then yeah it's like i'm not used to having to wear this many i'm not used to choice yeah we would have like we'd have casual clothes day where you'd bring like gold coin donation

to go to a charity. Yeah. And they really were the best. Like there was just something about being at school just in a t-shirt and jeans. Yeah. That made it feel like the day just flew by. We were on holidays. For some bizarre reason, just not having to wear, just being able to wear slightly different

clothes and see your friends in slightly different clothes is like, oh, man, this is, school's actually fun today. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, it's like a little holiday. It's a little vacation for your clothes. Which is so weird because you're still doing all the same level of work. Yeah. It's not like your teachers are like, you know what, you're wearing T-shirts. I'm not going to bother teaching you maths today.

Yeah, I forgot. shirts i'm not gonna bother teaching you maths today yeah i forgot it was even a bit like that with um uh i mean the last proper proper full-time job i had in an office it was like yeah i was wearing like you know the stuff i wore to to work i would never wear again outside of work yeah yeah you know wearing slacks and you know um business shirts and stuff like that. But then Friday was casual. But even then I'm like, oh, yeah, this is cool. As opposed to the wedding I went the other day where I went, like don't say a name, was like, all right, get in the cupboard and see if any of your suits fit you.

And I was like, oh, I'll just put it off to the last minute. She's like, you've got to get prepared. I'm like, why? I'm just going to go in and pick whatever suit fits me in like with five minutes to go before the wedding and that's that five minutes to go before we left like we pull the suits out and it's been that long since i've been to a wedding that there was they were just coated in dust of course it was just like a cartoon that's the main thing i think with getting ready is like it's not the yeah it's not so much that do they fit it's the like

this probably needs a dry clean yeah so not only did it need a clean they were all just coated in shit then we picked out the bit like the shirts

and I then had a vague memory of looking in my cupboard a year ago and going why do I have so many white shirts when do I ever wear white shirts

I'm fucking giving them away to the op shop like this and then to to play it safe i'd kept two white shirts so i picked out those two white shirts i had remaining and one of them that was just like fucking yellow through age like okay well i can't wear that one and then i pulled out the other one and the other one i have no idea why i have some vague memory of having it for a sketch or something that we've done. I just kept a shirt that was 3XL. Really, really way too big for me. Okay.

So I had the choice of a yellow shirt or a 3XL shirt. And what did you go with? I went with the yellow. Yeah. I mean, I guess you're keeping the jacket over it. Yeah. Probably all right. Yeah. And I think once we got out of the lighting of the bedroom, I was like, oh, it's, you yellow yeah i mean i guess you you're keeping the jacket over it yeah probably all right yeah and i

think once we got out of the lighting of the bedroom i was like oh it's you know that thing where you're going oh it's not that yellow maybe someone else wouldn't think it's uh it just is anytime you gotta wear a suit and like that's my worst nightmare is like you know yeah finding that out at the last minute because like turning up to something in a you want to you want to feel nice in a suit you want to feel like fresh and turning up knowing that in a you want to you want to feel nice in a suit you want to feel like fresh and turning up knowing that it's like covered in shit all the shirts dirty it's just like i hate that feeling of like i'm wearing a dirty suit yeah you know what i mean you want to feel crisp the whole thing of putting the suit on is you want to feel like yeah i'm

looking sharp i'm feeling good it was fine it was the only thing i was worried about was the yellow shirt the suit we mopped down, it was fine. But it was. It ended up being because I was like, I've probably lost weight since last summer. I was wearing suits. And so the one that I fit into the best was the one that I bought. The project, as in the TV show,

the project has like a clothes sale every six months or so oh yeah yeah yeah and I wore this to Nick Cody's wedding I just opened it up and it's got a like a tag in there Dave Hughes

yeah nice I wore Hughes's suit to this wedding yeah very nice does anyone does anyone object

to the to this marriage yes me no thank you no thank you no may. No, thank you. No, thank you. No, wedding, thank you. Well, thank you.

Who was that? Jamie Coe. Jamie Coe. Jamie Coe. Not sure how we got there, but that's who it was, Jamie Coe. Thank you very much to Patreon subscriber Adam Wilksh. Wilksh. W-I-L-K-S-C-H. Woof. Wilksh. Wilksh. W-I-L-K-S-C-H.

Woof. Wilksh. Would you rather be an Adam Wilksh or a Wilksh Adam? Having the first name Wilksh would be pretty cool. Wilksh. Wilksh. Is that Wil? Wilt?

Wilksh. Wilksh. It's Wilksh. No, it's Wilksh. It's actually Wilksh. W-Iksh. No, it's Wilksh. It's actually Wilksh. W-I-L-K-S-C-H. What is so goddamn hard to understand about that? Wilksh.

Yeah, I don't mind it. It sounds like you're doing the whip crack kind of sound effect. Oh, yeah. Wilksh. Yeah, it does do. Sounds like Dickie Nees involved. Yes. You looking up this person? No, what I'm doing is I Dickie Neese involved. Yes. You're hooking up this person?

No, what I'm doing is, I just had a vague memory of something. So at the gigs that I run, Basement Comedy Club, Friday, Saturdays, Comedy at Sleen on Mondays, I generally will do the door. And look, it's a very fascinating insight into the psychology of people and whether they know their own fucking names or not because it's non-stop me saying, this is the general way I describe it. Someone will walk in, I'll go,

surname of the booking place? And they'll go, John. And I go, John's your surname? Yes. That's your last name? Your last name is John? No. That's my first name.

Well, why did you just say that? Sorry, McManus. Yeah. So, people do not know their own fucking names. It fucking blows me away. But as we've talked about, there are also some just ripping surnames that I find out about. Not only on the Patreon ring, but on the door of comedy shows. I'm like, how the fuck is this a surname?

And there was, we talked about that. Who did we talk about? The fitness, no, the college frisbee. Oh, yeah, with Lomas? No. O'Neill. Yeah. O'Neill and Sammy Shaw we talked about it with.

Yeah. Who was it? I felt like there was someone last night. Yeah, here we go. This is not spectacular, but just literally the first time I've seen this as a surname. Someone's name was Lalani Lim, as in L-A-M-B. Okay. Her last name was Lim.

And even the Lalani as the intro to that. Lalani Lim. Yeah. Yeah, that's a big... That's too much. A name that sounds like you're stuttering the whole way through it. Yeah. Not ideal.

Yeah. Lalani. I just like Lim as a surname. Not arm. Not leg. No. Lim. More broad.

Yeah. More general. That's too specific. Let's not, you know, circle anyone. Let's not point them out. But hey, then Wilksh. Very specific. That's a little too specific, if you know what I mean.

Do you know what I mean? No. No. I don't get it at all. No. Wilksh. What happens when I look up Wilksh? Yeah, have a look.

What are you doing after this? I'm going to pick up my child. Nice. I thought you were joking before about how you'd left her in the car out the front. Did I joke about that? Yeah. We all laughed. That's an absurd thing to say.

I didn't even say that. No, I'm kidding. Oh, okay. I thought I'd... Yeah, anyway. That's someone else's joke, not me. All right. Let's see.

I'm trying to find our Adam Wilks. I don't think I'm going to... Lives in Adelaide. No, no, no, it's not. Different one. That's Wilks. The easy version. W-I-L-K-S.

Why don't you message him and see if he'll come Okay Well he's got two mutual friends Adam Wilkes Yeah Adam Wilkes From Adelaide has two mutual friends Dave Hughes and Troy Kinney Okay

Yeah so maybe you might want to come Yeah Should I message him? Yeah he likes comedy Okay alright I'll message him right now Yep We're not friends on Facebook

But what should I say to him? Hey i see that you're friends with two comedians hang on yeah position the mic so i can talk into it uh hang on i'll i think i'm okay all right all right yep hi adam good opener two we don't know each other yep but i feel like we are destined to end up in some way in some way together because of two unavoidable points of contact. Okay. Yep. One, you are friends with my friends. One, you are friends with my friend Troy Kinney.

Troy Kinney. Two, you are friends with my friend Troy Kinney. Troy Kinney. Two, you know Hughes. Oh, yes. You are friends with my friend Troy Kinney. Yes. Two, you know Hughes. Three, your name sounds a bit like a Patreon subscriber to a podcast that I do with my friend Tommy Daslow. Look him up.

Yep. Yep. Man, if this guy comes to my solo and not the pod, that's going to be an awesome result. So come, we have a live podcast. We have a live podcast in Adelaide. Yep. On March 11.

We'd love to see you there. Yep. We have plenty of crazy ideas planned for it. Guaranteed laugh fest. Guaranteed laugh fest. Guaranteed laugh fest. He's got dirt bikes in his profile pic. What do you think? Just lie and say we'll do some jokes about dirt bikes.

Well, we might have a guest that you could relate to. Yeah. Hang on. I'm changing laugh to laugh Yeah Yeah So So

Do you want me to do a plug for your show Your solo show Yeah sure Okay So Tommy's also got a solo show Tommy has a solo show At the Rhino Room At the Rhino Room

From February 28 From Feb 28 Just so I don't have to It's a long message already. Yeah. You don't want to. Shorten it a little bit. Yeah.

Yeah. Hope the dirt bikes are good. Yeah. Hope you have fun. Mm-hmm. Hope you have fun dirt bike riding, if you know what I mean. Yep. He will.

From Carl. Yep. He will. From Carl. Yeah. I think that's a good end. Yeah. I think saying from Carl at the end is a good... I think that's good. Yeah. I like it when I get a text message from someone over the age of 50 that has their name at

the end of the text where I'm like, yeah, I have your number saved. My dad signs off. He'll include the time and the day unaware that that message that information is just baked into the text already yep this is a good message okay send it's hard to see how this isn't going to translate into two ticket sales i feel like we're such good friends now I'll be giving him a comp though That's the only thing Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

Well, look Do you imagine a friend request incoming? Oh, I hope not Or do you imagine him messaging Troy Kinney and Dave Hughes To be like Who's this Carl guy? Yeah

I got this bizarre message From a so-called friend of yours Yeah Is this now I'm trying to imagine I got this bizarre message from a so-called friend of yours. Yeah. Is this now... I'm trying to imagine how this person in LA... Just to be clear, this is not the Patreon subscriber Adam Wilkes. No, no, no. This is Adam Wilkes of Adelaide.

This is a random Adam Wilkes from Adelaide. Yeah. But I'm trying to think how... And the offer of coming along to the Adelaide show is not open to you, Adam Wilkes. Sorry. No. I would love to know how this person ends up on the friends list of David Hughes and Troy Kinney. I'm saying that he's not actually friends with them.

I'm saying that he's just friend requested them because he likes their work. Sure. But those two people are just gone, okay. Sure. Yes. Fair. But there's lots of people like that. And you would have to imagine if he's doing that to them, he's doing that to a lot of

other people. And there'd be at least a couple of others that would have, you know, these types that just click confirm to fucking anyone. Oh, yeah. Yeah, maybe. But maybe I'm just not friends with those people. All right, Adam Wilkes. So, yeah. I guess maybe we'll see this guy in Adelaide.

Maybe we'll never meet you, Adam Wilkes, but we will meet Adam Wilkes. I'm going to be keeping an eye on my ticket sales. And, yeah, look, you live in Adelaide. There's a lot on at the moment. Not just in the fringe, but Adelaide has everything on all at once. So, you know, it's hard to know what's good to go to in your city if you live there and getting what could be better than a personalised out-of-the-blue recommendation in the inbox

from someone doing the show. I think, you know, I'd like to think this, people out there can not learn from this, but maybe do us a favor and do what I've done just now and just hit up, see someone that's on Facebook, see that they live in Adelaide and just send them a message without, I'd prefer if it's not your friend. Just see that some randoms from Adelaide and then go,

you know what, we don't know each other, but Little Dumb Dumb Club have a live podcast on in Adelaide, in your town at the moment. I think you should go and see them. Yeah. So if you ever see, ever hear of anyone from Adelaide, ever see anyone comes up on social media from Adelaide, please send them a message.

Yes. And say, we don't know each other, but I feel like if you're on social media, that means you like to be entertained or distracted in some way. Yep. And you know what entertains and distracts? The Little Dum Dum Club. Exactly.

Why don't you go along? Yeah. It's on March 11. Yeah. Yeah. I think it's not unreasonable to ask every one of our listeners to hunt down Adelaide residents and send that message. Yeah. Let's end up at the Adelaide Live Show with a room full of people who started listening a week ago.

Yeah. That's what we want. Yeah. a lot of people who really aren't into that but have been harassed by a stranger exactly yeah well thanks adam for inspiring this new uh this new grassroots campaign for us yes uh all right let's just do one more okay i gotta go and pick up my child because my wife is busy tonight so i thought you know what i'll come and do these pods today and i'll have i'll have just you know oh we're gonna do a fucking page what do we call it a um a video after this yeah when do we need it by we're gonna do it okay yeah um you can still what do we call them done um dumio we don't have it on the website anymore but this guy just googled it and found it.

So I guess we're still doing them. Yeah. If you want to do a personalized message from us, if you just want to Google it and find it, you can do it. We prefer you don't. Yeah. You're painting the ass to do it. Yeah, I don't want to do this one at all. They're really annoying to do.

Yeah. I don't want to do it. But if you pay us money, I guess we have to do it. All right. One more subscriber. I wonder what it's going to be. I think it's going to be... I don't know.

What do you think it's going to be? Adam Comedy? No. Okay. You're wrong with the name that's come up here. Well, I mean, I don't have the screen in front of me, so I'm just guessing. I'm not expecting you to get it first.

But I reckon you could get it within three. Yeah, what other... I reckon you're a good guesser. Let's see, what else could it be? Would you like any clues? That'd be good. All right, the last name starts with a C. Huh.

Carl Chandler? Sure. Yes, yes. huh Carl Chandler sure yes yes thanks to Patreon subscriber Carl Chandler and thanks everyone who subscribes

to the little dum-dum club and listens yeah every week you're welcome and we'll see you next time

see you mate see you mates hey guys on a slightly more serious note we received some sad news this week a long-time listener in the show someone who came to samui with us uh has uh was in a bad way and uh took his life so very sad to hear that now thoughts with his family friends and loved ones and we

just thought maybe it was a good time to just uh you know, if you're feeling in that way, if you're feeling like you don't have any help and you don't know what to do, it is a good idea to reach out, talk to people. And, I mean, you can even call Lifeline 131114. Yeah, this stuff comes up on the show a bit. You know, we obviously, we joke about it. We're pretty, like, light-handed about this topic. But, yeah, getting this news during the week, this was someone that we knew relatively well

from them being at, yeah, like you said, Samoian live shows and stuff. To Dirk. Dirk, yeah. Active on the socials and I think also had met a lot of people that he knew through this pod, had a few friends, yeah, from meeting them at live shows and such. So, yeah, I mean, you hear something like this, and it just is worth jumping in and reminding people that it is a serious thing. And, yeah, obviously – There's help out there. There's people you can talk to, whether you feel weird talking to your friends

and all that stuff, or if you just want to, like I said, crack on to 131114 Lifeline, or you know what? If you're not feeling that way, a good way to do something is to contribute to them. You can donate to Lifeline. So if you go to their website, you can find out how to do that if you want to do your bit. Yeah. So our thoughts are with his family and friends and everything.

And yeah, to all the rest of you, yeah, take care of yourselves. Hope everyone is okay. And yeah, there's always help out there if you need it. Yes. Thanks. Cheers, guys. See you, mates.