The Little Dum Dum Club with Tommy & Karl - 662 - Dave O'Neil & Sam Taunton

Episode Date: June 14, 2023

This week we're joined by SAM TAUNTON and DAVE O'NEIL! As per usual, Dave's got some absurd gig stories for us including roasting the guests at a birthday party, Sam's been involved in a legal dispute with Australian pop music royalty, Karl's befriended a stranger, Tommy's done a runner from a wedding PLUS we have a hefty update regarding our favourite long-delayed comedy gig. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Today on the Little Dumb Dumb Club, a brand new episode with guests Dave O'Neill and Sam Taunton. The Little Dumb Dumb Club is on Patreon. You can get on there and support the show. Get a couple of bonus mini episodes every week. Patreon.com slash Little Dumb Dumb Club. We're going to chat to you more at the end of the episode in Talking Dumb Dumb. But until then, enjoy this brand new episode with guests Dave O'Neill and Sam Taunton. Hey mates, welcome once again into the Little Dumb Dumb Club for another week. Thank you very much for joining us. My name is Tommy Daslow and with me as always, the other other half of the program Carl Chandler. G'day dickheads.

And joining us today, two very special guests. Please welcome back onto the show Dave O'Neill and Sam Taunton. Hey folks. What's up? O'Neill caught me doing a runner before I got here. He was walking the wrong way. Oh really? Hey Taunts. Hey Taunts, come back.

I can't carry this by myself. I thought you'd change your mind. Need some star power. Comedy's about to happen. Quick. He's he just had a... I can't carry this by myself. Yeah, I thought he'd change his mind. Need some star power. Comedy's about to happen. Quick. No, he was putting something in a bin. Putting something in a bin. I didn't want to use your bin, Tommy.

Oh, yeah. It's a bad look coming straight in the door and asking to use the bin. With a handful of rubbish. Well, it depends what you're chucking out. That's the thing. Like, what don't you want us to know? Oh, yeah. It was like a vape wrapper.

Oh, okay. Is that not the grimace look of all time? To turn up with some vape wrapping put it in was it are you a vapor yeah i hope so if you just walk around what's your what's your favorite flavor this um well the vape store i go to is just over here they do incense and vape and like it's a sweet little market they've got going oh yeah so i go in there and pick some incense and some vapes up. But I get orange, mango, pineapple. Oh, I love it. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

There's a burger, there used to be a burger store near here. And it opened and it was shit. And you're looking at it going, all right, well, this place doesn't have long. And I walked past it the other day and it's a vape shop now. And it's like, if you're in the industry, any business that looks kind of failing, you're hanging around in the wings being like, we're about to get a new outlet, boys. He was a big vaper.

He had a vaping cheesy. He was a big vaper. I feel like I got him into vaping. You probably did because he was shishka for a while. It was when he was hitting the shishka. He was shishka. He was addicted to the shisha. The shisha.

You're a shisha. What is shishka? The shishka babs. The shishka babs. Smoking meat. Yum. Well, we know he's a vegan. Imagine going to get a kebab and Hugh's in there.

Just like licking the meat off the side. I just thought of sticking some of this lamb in my pipe. Have a good night, boss. So how did you get him into vaping? Well, no, there was a period where Hugh's was hitting the open mic scene in Sydney like really hard. And he got very... He got really good at comedy after that.

What, did he want to meet mentally unstable people? He was so deep. What about the other open micers? He was trying to like... He wanted to open a room and stuff as well. Oh, my God. I think we talked about this. Yeah, I heard that he was hitting you up.

He wanted to open a comedy room. He sent me a text one day. He goes, just found a space in Bondi down the stairs. 60 seats, but I reckon we can pack it out at most Tuesday.

The owner is keen. I'm going to sell him the Spleen franchise. We can pack it out. Yeah, he got really into it. He wanted you involved. He wanted me involved. But I remember there was just a point where he was too into the,

like I would get there and someone was emceeing and he'd be like, oh, the character they do, it doesn't work emceeing. She's bombing, she's bombing. Like he got too deep into knowing everyone's ins and outs. He was becoming a room runner. He's getting the madness. I felt like he felt he was away from home and he just like was blending into another corner.

The opposite of cabin fever. Is he spending a day out of his week sitting there paying invoices for $60 for this room in Bondi? They don't even have an ABN. Just running the sign-up sheet at the front of the room. You're stinging me for GFT. Having divorced guys with guitars. Mate, I've got my raw file. I need to get on.

We're full up tonight. We're full up tonight. I feel like we raw file. I need to get on. We're full up tonight. We're full up tonight. I feel like we talk about you literally every week. Come back next Tuesday. Yeah, right. Come back next Tuesday. But at that time, he was like heaps of the open micers were vaping. And I'd be vaping.

And they'd be like backstage vaping or whatever. And then he just asked for it one day. He got early to this show that I was running with Cashman and Cambo and we were all vaping. And then, oh, we weren't all vaping, but a few people were. And then he was like, oh, that's all right. Can I have a go? Bang.

This will make me young again. Yeah, I think so. I think he's always looking for the edge to be relevant. Is he looking for new stuff to take on that he can then quit? Yeah. He does like quitting. It's an addiction. That's what's happened.

And so, like, the next time I saw him the next week, he has his own vape. And he's vaping and he's like, I'm hiding it from my wife. Personalised monogram vape. He was in the car once and the kids had to get out and then he had a quick vape and the kids get in. Have you been vaping, Dan? And he goes, no. A fan came up and wanted a photo and they were vaping. It's believable.

Tracks. He's lying to his kids. I think he's stopped now. He's lying. He tracks. He's lying to his kids. I think he's stopped now. He's off the vape. He has stopped, yeah. But the last time I saw him vaping, he had a non-alcoholic beer and a vape. Just like that.

And I'm like, oh, there's some problems here. What's the next thing that you could get him into that's him like chasing the youth? I've been really into eating ass lately. All the kids are doing it. He must be on TikTok by now. He is on TikTok, but I remember he asked into eating ass lately. All the kids are doing it. He must be on TikTok by now. He is on TikTok, but I remember he asked me about TikTok once. Fuck, you're Hughie's youth correspondent.

Hughie's your Dorian Gray portrait. I forget which way it goes. But I think he said his son has got more TikTok followers than him. Yeah, beautiful. He doesn't want to approach it. He doesn't want to get into it too much because it's embarrassing. Right, he doesn't want it to be awkward around the dinner table. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's his son's area. You leave that alone. He says that, but it's like he's very competitive. You must drive him wild. Yeah, no. Maybe he's got more than me. I can't believe it. Launching a smear campaign.

Trying to steal all of his son's followers. Fuck. Sydney, here's a... I did a thing. Here's something I think you'll relate to, Dave, but maybe not the rest of you. Because I went down the street a couple of weeks ago. I relate to that.

In Hawthorne. Yeah, I've done that. Hey, you wait. You see what's coming. I've done... Buying shit food? No. No. I'm now at the. Buying shit food? No. No.

I'm now at the age where if I see people, sometimes I can see people I used to work with or knew from ages ago, and now they no longer look like they used to. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, right, right, right. It's good to go to a high school reunion.

Yeah, I don't know if you guys relate to this. But do you still recognize them? Well, that's the thing. Now it's in question. to a high school reunion. Yeah, I don't know if you guys relate to this. But do you still recognize them? Well, that's the thing. Now it's in question. So this is what happened. So I walked down the street and I saw someone coming where I'm like, ah, fuck that. Is that Phil?

That's who I used to work with. This woman I used to work with about 12 years ago. But she looks a bit different now. Okay, all right, all right. And I walked up and went, hey. And she's like, oh, hey. And when I got close, I was like, this is not,

this is not Julie. It's not. Yeah. It's not her anymore. Right. Yeah. Yeah. We're sure.

And she doesn't recognize you. Maybe, but I, but I'm sitting there with the kid in the pram and we've, I've stopped, you know, I've made the effort to stop and say, Hey,

how's it going on that? And then very clearly, she's like, I don't know what's going on. Yeah. I know who you are. This can't be him. Yeah. Yeah. very clearly she's like, I don't know what's going on. Yeah, I know who you are. This can't be him. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She's like,

I don't know what's going on either. So I'm like, oh, hey, whatever. So then I just go, anyway, I got the kids, so I got to go. I'm like, fuck, that's fucking pretty weird

because I don't even know this woman I'm talking about. That was your act. You didn't say, oh, sorry. I'm sorry. I thought you were someone else. No, no, no.

I've got the kid. I've got to get out of here. I've done that before. I said, sorry, I thought you were someone else. You didn't say that? No, I didn't. Because I sort of was trying to save face. I was sorry, I thought you were someone else. I've got the kid, I've got to get out of here. I've done that before. Sorry, I thought you were someone else. You didn't say that? No, I didn't. Because I was trying to save face.

I was like, oh, no, I'll just play this off, whatever. But the bad thing is, because it's Hawthorne, because I'm like a local. You see her all the time. Now I see her all the time. But now I have to fucking keep saying hello because I didn't pull out the first time. And I'm like, this is just a normal relationship I'm having

this is cool so now potentially you have just made a new friend past like 30 it is so hard to make new friends yeah but I can't make

it's not a real new friend because I can't at any stage say what is your name because I'm like still going oh we're mates number one you've got a baby so you're not threatening

men with babies are never threatening I reckon but I reckon you need to say next time hey sorry I thought you were someone I used to But I reckon you need to say it next time. Hey, sorry, I thought you were someone I used to work with, but you're not.

Yeah, we've said it like 10 times now, but can we stop saying hi now? It's a good trick. If I ever see someone at a pub that I think looks cool that I want to be friends with, I'm going to sidle up and be like, Sam, hey, and then have them be, oh, sorry. Anyway, now that I'm here.

It's pretty weird, isn't it? Now that I'm here, what's everyone in your isn't it? Now that I'm here, what's your, like, everyone in your family's name? What do you do for a job? Now that we're hanging out, let's keep doing it. Yeah, totally. I always think it's, like, so hard to make friends, like, past 30. But then it's so hard to, like, actually know any information about anyone's life. Like, I've got best friends of mine.

I wouldn't be able to tell you Their brothers names Their like You know like Anything about them on the surface I know they like footy And that's like it I'm the same I've got a new friend in Hawthorne I couldn't tell you their name

I'm like that with like Most jobs honestly Like a friend of mine Is a surveyor And then my other friend was like So what actually is that? And I was like I couldn't tell you

I know the title And that's enough You hold the stick yeah they have the stick and they're on the street a bit there's a proper word for the um the camera or the sticks but i know that i know like i can have like a mental i can have like the mental image of it yes but then how's that eight hours a day five days a week that's what i don't get yeah you know what's the actual work yeah i know i know but no i could explain it because i've done the surveyors associations twice so i know what i do every job you're the king of the corporate you do every occupation there is so you know everything wait here's a pitch for you o'neill as a as a corporate man. We have like a folder. We put a folder together. And like every time you do a gig for like the surveyors or accountants

and you have like accountants joke, you put it in this shared folder. Oh, yeah. Good idea. And then all the comedians get to use it. Open source. Yeah. So when you're there and you're like, oh, I'm doing the whatever, the finance. Well, surveyors, all I can remember is saying, who does the camera?

Who does the stick? And you're older. You do the camera when you're mate. That young bloke would hold the stick? And there's, you're older, you do the camera when you're mate. That young bloke would hold the stick, wouldn't he? They're like,

yeah, because there's a whole status thing about holding the stick. You're making me realise this friend of mine who's the surveyor, the thing about him

in our group of friends is that he's like, he's very much like a social chameleon. Like, literally, he's one of those guys that you can put in front

of literally anyone and he'll find common ground. Like, he's interested in enough like most things that he can crack through with people and it's like in another life he'd make a great crowd work comedian you know because he's got that thing of also i love that thing of like you know if you have an occupation that has little things and pieces and whatever you could if you get in there everyone relates to it but everyone else is like what the fuck is going on? Because you just saying that, that'll kill it, the surveyors. It's like, who holds the stick?

Yes! Well, it's a pole. They call it a pole by memory. Because it didn't land in here. I was like, when's the big joke coming out? But when you think about it, every job has some equivalent of the guy that holds the stick. That's the magic.

That's true. The Comedians Association. Who holds the microphone? The shit kicker. I thought it was a status thing. Yeah. Teachers, they'd be like, you teach year 7. Fuck head.

PE teachers. Wow, this really is a master class. Let's go and join in. Do you teach? I teach a bit of science. How long have we been letting you blokes in the classroom for? Oh, wow. A peek behind the curtain.

This is unbelievable. The masterclass. The masterclass online. This is like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, my God. I will actually fund a Dave O'Neill masterclass. What you've got to do, this is the biggest trick. Go there, have a look at the seating plan, remember a few names,

and also remember what they do for a job if it's got their job. So I did one the other day. They're all builders, but this table had an architect and seven builders, and they're up the front, and I remember his name was Chris with a K. So I just go on. I go, oh, look at all you blokes. You're all builders. Look at all these.

You're not a builder, mate, are you? Yeah, there's no way you're picking up the tools. What are you? Hang on, at all you blokes. You're all builders. Look at all these. Oh, you're not a builder, mate, are you? Yeah. There's no way you're picking up the tools. What are you? Hang on, mate. I'll guess. You're an architect. Yes.

What? Yes. And they're all like clapping. It's like those mind reader shows. It's like a magician revealing his trick. Exactly. I don't want to hear this. I go, what's your name?

I try and guess your name. And then I go, Phil, Paul, Mark, Chris. Chris. Hey, you're an architect. Is it with a K? Oh, my God. There was two of them in the prestige. Oh, my God. Dave's like the masked riffer, the guy who goes on the TV show.

Sometimes it comes unstuck. On Saturday night, I did a private party for Rob's 50th birthday. Oh, a clone. Did you know Rob? No. So Rob books you. He's a geologist. Oh, nice. What's he doing? He's a geologist. Oh, nice.

What's he do? He's a geologist? Yeah, there we go. What's your favourite rock? Here we go. I thought I had a good one because he grew up in Ararat and I said, look,

he grew up surrounded by dirt and rocks so that inspired him to become a geologist. Nah, crickets. I reckon that's pretty good. That's better than the who's holding the little stick. Yeah, no. But anyway.

I reckon the stick's better. I reckon the stick's better. I reckon the stick's better. It's fancy dress, and so he's dressed up as a lobster. What? Well, lead with that. What are you focusing on Abra Rats for? You idiot. Wear an aerial and flounder, you fucking idiot.

All I can come up with is your costume. You've buried the lead. Your costume is a little bit shellfish that's what I said oh my god shit house money well spent I'm not

I want my refund from the master class class now wait so what's when you say it's fancy dress was there a theme or was it literally just like

I love that there were several popes there was a few cardinals there was Mario Brothers there were two Ted Lasso's wait hang on at a men's 50th dress up

just no coordination between the multiple was there a religious element no no they were all geologists and people that work in mining

so they would that's so good but just deep fans of the Catholic church maybe it's an easy costume like I look at when I'm doing my stand-up. There's a pope holding a thing.

There's a cardinal. So I was trying to do jokes. I got molested when I walked in by that guy. Well, there we go. But you're pointing at Super Mario. Super Mario. It tells you where the zeitgeist is at the moment. Multiple popes, multiple Ted Lasso's, multiple Super Mario's.

Yeah, it was interesting. I haven't been to a costume party for years. So Ted Lasso's, multiple Super Mario's. Yeah, it was interesting. I haven't been to a costume party for years, so Ted Lasso. Now, is that just the touching stone for people 50-year-old that are a bit out of touch and going, I guess if I put on a fake moustache on Ted Lasso. Yeah, you don't have to go to the shop. But it's also just an easy show for a 50-year-old man to be like,

I love Ted Lasso. That's a show I'm watching. I'm sure 50-year-old blokes love Ted Lasso. Any Borats? No. Any Mancini's making an appearance? No. I reckon a 40th you would get a Borat.

I reckon 10 years ago you got a lot of Borats. Oh, yeah, a 50th, yeah. There was just a few Ildefar, like, wigs. I think there was an Austin Powers. Okay, that's interesting. Yeah, that's interesting. No Borat, but an Austin Powers. That's really interesting.

Any Dame Edna's in tribute to the loss of their king? No, there was no Dame Edna's. You should have gone as Dame Edna. I could have. Could you have done stand-up in fancy dress? Because if you go as Dame Edna, then you just get to rip her gear. Yeah. True.

It's been said before I look a bit like Dame Edna. I said, Rob asked me what my costume is. I said, I'm a lesbian from Northcote. Oh, there we go. Fuck you. Get him. There we go. Anyway, so I'm on stage.

It's going okay. That would have ripped with people from Ararat. Just a Northcote reference. Where's that? Where's that and what's that? Do they have dirt there as well? They're all from Melbourne. Can I ask,ote referee. Where's that? Where's that and what's that? Do they have dirt there as well? They're all from

Melbourne. What's your link to Rob? Is this just like a random hit up through fan page or friend of friend?

Is it just in the lounge room of a house? No, it's in a bar. You've got a mic and stuff? I've got a mic

and I'm standing a little stage and behind me is a DJ. He's standing there while I'm performing. He's DJ there while I'm performing. Is he DJing your jokes?

No. You're surrounded by rock and dirt. Bernie Mac style. I've heard that before, don't worry. I'm a lesbian from Northgate. Waka, waka, waka. A bit of constant craving by KD. Dave O'Neill is fucking in heaven.

Dave O'Neill is fucking in heaven. Dave O'Neill is fucking in heaven. Anyway, I've just resorted to hanging shit on people. I look at the DJ, he's got a little moustache and a bomber jacket. I go, oh, look at this DJ. And he's come dressed as a fighter pilot. And that gets a bit of a response. So I start going hard on him. This poor guy.

This poor guy. He's your fellow mate. The only other performer. I know. It gets worse Trust me It gets worse Because I thought he was

Like a young guy And I said Where do you live He goes Hampton I go With mum and dad He's like no And then I'm like

I'm getting good laughs Out of hanging shit on him And then And then anyway Then I segway Into my relatable material About who's got a beach house Who owns a beach house

And you know There was a geologist Who owned beach houses Which was good for my routine And then I hear Andy behind me go I got a beach house. Who owns a beach house. And, you know, there was a jolly few owned beach houses, which is good for my routine. And then I hear Andy behind me go, I own a beach house. I'm like, shut up, Andy. You don't own a beach house, you fuck it. Anyway, I'm going really hard on this poor guy. The bloke who with one touch of a button could drown you out instantly.

Anyway, and then the lobster gets up, grabs the mic. I don't even have names. La Lobster. It's his party, mate. This is a joke. He booked you. A lobster, a fighter pilot

and a lesbian walking to a 50th. He goes, Dave, great, thanks for that. That's awesome. Special guest DJ,

have you met Andy? He's from, he wrote Don't Call Me Baby. He's from Madison Avenue. Oh, yes. Number one in Australia. number one in the UK. I fucking love that song.

I'm like, fuck, you do own a beach house. He goes, yeah, I do. And he's like... Don't talk to me, Davey. I know. And then they played the song. And I just feel like a complete asshole. Andy from Madison Avenue.

Yeah, great. More successful than anyone in that room. Well, he's DJing a 50th, so is he? I don't know. I know, but he... Was he okay with you after? Did you have a word? Yeah, he was nice.

He's a really nice guy. You were probably on an episode of Spicks and Specks with him. I interviewed him. I've interviewed him on radio. Absolutely. You would have played that song back when you were on. You would have played that song hundreds of times. It was the 2000s.

The early 2000s. Don't Call Me Baby. That's your hitting show. Greatest Logan's performance of all time. He still gets checks from it, and that's how he bought a beach house. Oh, really? Don't Call Me Baby. Oh, we got the intel from him.

Yeah. He's still getting checks, he said. Oh, how big are the checks these days? Oh, thousands, he said. What? Thousands? I don't know the song. Don't Call Me Baby.

You've got to learn that I'll never do. The number one. You know I baby You got to learn That I'll never do That I'll never do You know I don't belong to you Don't call me baby Do we have to pay Afro for this now? I think so yeah He's getting another check off this Put in a word

See if we can get that To be our new theme song If he can give us permission Sure I'm good Nah he was fine He said nah that's fine He goes I'm actually old I'm good. No, he was fine. He said, no, that's fine. He goes, I'm actually old.

I'm not young. He looked good, though. Yeah, right. Gotta get his skin. How much do you reckon they make? Because I had some legal disputes with the lead singer of Train recently. What? Hang on.

You know. What was their big hit? They had a huge hit. Yeah, they had a few. Drops of Jupiter. Drops of Jupiter. They're a Christian band I think

oh really I think they oh I might be getting it wrong is that why they're so litigious pretend I mean maybe I don't know so how does this start

so what happened is I'm probably wondering how you got here right now can we freeze frame no so I had this I filmed some stand up

like a few weeks ago and a big part of the show I tell this story I filmed some stand-up like a few weeks ago. And a big part of the show, I tell this story. This is a pretty funny story. I hope so. You recorded it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, I mean, I saw Train play once at the football, like at halftime.

They just started playing at the football. Oh, my God. And they launched into Drop to Jupiter. Hang on, you're saying, oh, my God, fucking your mate's performing it behind Dave O'Neill at a 50th birthday party. Train are doing fine, okay. Yeah, At a 50th birthday party Train to doing fine Yeah Train to doing fine Anyway so

They play Dr. Jupiter And then The crowd's like That's pretty cool And then they Launch into their new single At the time This is like a decade ago

Haste Hold Sister Everyone was like Nah it's pretty good Not as good as Dr. Jupiter No But then they finish And then everyone's like That was pretty good

It's half time Everyone went to walk away And then the lead singer's like We've got one more song to play Yeah And everyone's like Please What are they going to play

Please That's it And they launch straight back Into Drop to Jupiter Exactly There we go Amazing There we go

That's what I was saying please Yeah yeah yeah Exactly So they played the same song twice It's like my friend When he saw Smash Mouth They played Sorry

They played In Hey Now Your Rockstar Twice Yeah yeah And so they should In a set list of like 15 songs It's like my friend when he saw Smash Mouth, they played, sorry, they played, you know, Hey Now, You Rock Star twice. Yeah, yeah. And so they should in a set list of like 15 songs, but in a set list of three songs. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Stretching it slightly.

It's like 66% of the time. Yes. They were just playing the one. Like, did they write a set list and then have to consult it? I've told this before. You were on this same tour as well. We were on different days. The Falls Festival when Daryl Braithwaite played.

And he rips out horses like four times. Yes. Just keeps breaking it out to the set. We saw him do horses together, I feel like. Yeah, I think so. I think you would say surface level, that's a bit pathetic playing the same song twice. But I would say that's a fucking great thing to do because that shows you've had a massive success at some stage. This is how big this song was.

I have to play it twice. Yeah, but also like I've been doing stand-up and like you know I've been doing okay then really started bombing and if I could just retell one of those songs and it would get the same response. I would absolutely. Are you kidding?

Open on your, what is it? Close on your best? Open on your second best. Well, guess what? They're the same joke. It's a big drop off from the top down to the fifth best. I'm opening on my best and closing on my second best. Well, guess what? They're the same joke. It's a big drop off from the top down to the fifth best. I'm opening on my best and closing on my second best because the second best is just the best that you've already heard,

so it doesn't go as well. Right, of course. Anyway, so I told that story in this recording and then I have this big thing at the ending of the show where I use the song Drop to Jupiter. So I was like, I'm going to license the song Drop to Jupiter oh that's interesting do you sing it

or no you just play it so when I no no I just play it but it's like a video and stuff and it all kind of like pulls back to stuff in the show

like it's it's quite a strong ending and without it I'm like the show sucks like I need this thing it's no who holds a stick no I don't have that kind of stuff

in my back pocket your lobster costume I'm not like oh you're a priest you molested someone I don't have that stuff to stick. No, I don't have that kind of stuff in my back pocket. Your lobster costume. I'm not like, oh, you're a priest, you molested someone. I don't have that stuff to fall back on. Good night. Off mic, you've referred to this to me as Nanette for blokes. Yeah, yeah, it is.

Nanette for blokes. I've heard that. Weirdly what I'm calling my show next year is Nanette for blokes. For the fellas. I think it's called Tauntette. Tauntette. Nanette for the fellas. It's just like the lastuntette. Tauntette. The net for the fellas. It's just like the last 30 minutes is a harrowing story

about losing a grand final by one point with no laughs. And that's why I'm quitting comedy. Anyway, so I'm like, I want this. So I ask the people that are producing the show to be like, Approach them Yeah can you ask And so the lead singer Of Train comes back

He goes You can have it But it's going to cost It was like I'm not joking 65 grand Wow To license it

And I was like Well that's like I can't afford that That's crazy And you know that's coming From the lead singer Do you know that Well no so this is where it goes

Train Inc So it went to like Apparently they just have A set price or whatever. And then the production company goes like, I'll see if I can get it down. That seems crazy. He comes back with like $35,000. That's good.

For one minute. Okay. That was his offer. He didn't have one minute. No, for whatever it is. Do you need the whole thing? No, so I don't need the whole thing. This is like succession.

Yeah, I know. I'm talking like tech growth. I'm like, it doesn't play. It doesn't play. So have you got a price in mind? Well, I kind of am like, yeah, I don't want to spend. Well, you'd pay 10, 5 grand. Yeah, so I was like about 5 or 6.

Is 5 what you're thinking? 5 or 6 is what I was thinking, right? Because you've got a long way to go from 35. Anyway, so I was like, can I get someone to record it? I know a few musicians. So I was like, I'll just get someone to cover it. How much is it going get someone to record it? I know a few musicians. I was like, I'll just get someone to cover it. How much is it going to cost to cover it? Right, right, right.

It still costs money, though. Yeah, well, then... Can you get someone bigger than trained to cover it? Yeah. You get like Tones and I to cover it. Get Mercer and Avenue. I get Tamey and Violet too. Oh, Andy.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. The rights cost you like $100, but the actual recording costs you like $4,000. $4,000, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, so he was like the cover, it got to the guy, the publisher spoke to the guy directly and he's like, he goes, I really don't feel comfortable with it being used in a comedy special. He's like, so I want to make money. So even a cover, he was going to say a cover was like 16 grand.

Because have they asked you in what context are you using the song in the comedy special? Yes. And then you have to say, I'm doing material about how it's pathetic that you're – The joke is you because you guys are shit. How much? Well, this is where it goes to.

So I then – the guy said, look, there is one last option. He goes, I can send him a recording of you doing the bit. And I was like, let's not do that. Yeah. I don't want him. And they were like, he's a very artistic guy, and he really holds this song as his big thing, and he's very careful.

He plays it twice in a three-song gig. Of course. That's how much he loves it, right? I've got to say, this is good management. He's really going into bat. He's building up the character. And this is relatable to people at home. If they've ever wanted to license, this is good management. I think so. He's really going into bat. He's like building up the character. And this is relatable to people at home. If they've ever wanted to license a number one US hit,

you know how to do it after this episode. And it's probably his big money earner. Like, I don't know what he's doing. So it's like, this is how he, you know. This keeps him from DJing his fucking 50th birthday party. We should spend a week trying to license a song for one episode of this podcast with a budget of five grand Just see what we can get

See what we can get Just see what we can get But you could get something Like pretty good You could get an Australian hit You could get like Yeah but we don't want mates rates It can't just be like

Us hitting up someone we know No I want to see I want to deal with The Baja men See what we can get Yeah yeah That's the thing

You can deal with them So it got back to this So they were like The guy was like We don't want to send the video But maybe you could write A letter To the lead singer of Train

I love this And beg And so I wrote I love this I wrote Because I've heard of this Like you know Madonna herself

She had to write A heartfelt letter to ABBA To clear Like a sample for That massive hit she had In like You know 15 years ago

Yeah what was that one Oh Hung Up Hung Up Yeah yeah yeah That's hit she had in 15 years ago. Yeah, what was that one? Oh, Hung Up. Hung Up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what she had to do. I think Jack Black went begging to Led Zeppelin to be allowed to use a song of theirs in School of Rock. Oh, right.

So this is you. I'm following in their footsteps, guys. You're the Madonna to Train's Abba. You're Weird Al hitting up Coolio Yeah Okay that's probably more apt That's better Weird Al

That's kind of literally what it is Actually it is Yeah because Weird Al has to ask everyone He doesn't have to No he does We had him on project and he said Only one person said no Prince said no

Prince said no. Prince said no? Prince said no. But then someone else wasn't getting back to him, so he stalked them on a tour and then burst into their backstage and was like, can I use your song? That's sick. And they were like, yeah, you crazy man, just take your song and get out of here. Weird Al rang Nirvana on the set of Saturday Night Live.

Really? Yeah, he was like, how do I track these guys down? And rang them at Rockefeller Centre and they're in the green room and it's like, Weird Al's on the phone, it's for you, Kurt. Weird Al.

Weird Al. No one would say no to Weird Al now. I've met him a few times, he's not that weird. Oh, Neil's criticism. He should be called Al Yankovic.

It's all a front. It's all a character. I don't know. You just think he's a normal guy. Yeah, he seemed very normal, actually. I bet he is. So anyway. We had him on this podcast once.

Yeah. Over the phone. Was he good? Half an hour or something. Yeah, he was nice. He was very clearly made to talk to us. Normal Al Yankovic is what he should change it to. So I wrote a letter to the leader of Train and it was like...

Handwriting with the official Sam Taunton stationery. Had the Taunton family crest just punch it onto the letterhead. Dear Train. Dear Train, I love your work. And it was just a lot of that, me just kind of like saying... If I was the head of Train, I'd be song If I was the head of train I'd be like I'm the train driver That'd be the thing

I'm not the engineer Yeah Signing off Toot toot To the front cabin But I just told him How much I love the song And I do genuinely

Like the song And then I told him That I was using it To highlight How much better music is How people appreciate music more than comedy. Oh, my God. Which is true.

I really kind of sucked him off for like 500 words in this letter. A little drawing down the bottom of you sucking him off. No, no. It was just of a train. That's you. You with the conductor hat on or whatever. Hand in the air. And then I sent it off

And I was like If it doesn't work I don't know what I'm going to do And then he came back And he said You can have 40 seconds For 7 grand Oh wow

And I said deal And we did it Yeah That's great Yeah it was a real success story That's great So from 60 What was it 65,000

It was about It might not have been 60 But it was up around that It was around that And that was going to cover the whole song. That's the whole song. But that's the same rate as if you licensed it for any TV show. For Grey's Anatomy.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But imagine, so he's said yes to this and he's told his wife and kids and when your special comes out, they're all going to gather around. This guy really loves my song. He's just like, what the fuck? Yeah, with Sam Thorne pulling his pants down and hanging a big brown eye on stage as the song's going on. But it is funny that the lead singer of Train

just is like having to deal in an email chain back and forth over my stupid little stand-up that I did to 20 people at Melbourne Comedy Festival every night and now he's got to just deal with the legal headache of it. Well, that's the crazy thing is that if they're in the position where they're playing the same song twice, you would think it's like, oh, wow, I'm wrapped that, you know, someone like new and young and comedy wants to like, you know, use this and make a thing out of it.

Yeah. You know what I mean? Give this song fresh life. You would think you'd be on it. Yeah. But I would like the idea that he's thinking, you know, I've got to get my money out of this guy because there's going to be a lot of punters out there that are choosing not to listen to my song on Spotify.

I'm losing that money because they're just going to loop Sam Taunton's special. Yeah. Listen to my song on that for nothing. Just play the back end of it. In Pulp Fiction, you know the gimp scene when they go release the gimp? It's my favourite scene.

Your favourite scene. In any movie, I love it. Tarantino wanted my Sharona. I know. It was like a butt-fucking beat. Yeah, yeah. And the guy, I think he's a Christian, Tarantino wanted my Sharona I know Yeah you know It was like a butt fucking beat Yeah yeah And he said And the guy The guy I think is a Christian

He said no no You're not going to use my song He's got a lot of other things Going on the lead singer Of The Knack Yeah Well I reckon a lot of people Would want to use that song

In different stuff Yeah I bet yeah It's a great song Well also like That was What's Pulp Fiction 92 That song was like

Nine and eighty So he still He was still like I'm hip I'm current That's only twelve years old Now I reckon You could probably get it

For fifty bucks I reckon Well you know The whole Tina Turner NRL thing How she had Simply the best Simply the best

She was like She did ads for the The NRL Yeah It would be like Beyonce did A-League Now it was the face of A-League Like it's

Actually like insane that it happened. But the guy who was head of the NRL, he heard the album because she was doing another song for them, heard that song before it was a hit, and they made her an offer to have it for like five or six years, and then it became this huge hit, but they already had the rights for it. That's interesting.

That's like the Beatles had that deal with coming down to Australia and they signed it with no fucking nobody and then they become huge and they still had to come down because their manager was like, well, a deal's a deal. It's like, cunt,

they're working for like five bucks a day. He's like, yeah, but I don't want to be seen as a guy that goes back on his word. I'm like, how about you be seen as a good manager that ups the fee to a million bucks a gig, you fucking idiot. And didn't they, when they came down, they just played like Festival Hall. Festival Hall.

And they played the Horden or something in Sydney. Like quite small venues. Yeah. Like now they would do MCG. Yeah, but back then, they literally didn't have the technology for speakers. So it was like they played Festival Hall. Oh, so you couldn't do. With amps.

It was like holding up your iPhone. Yeah. And you couldn't hear them. There was so much screaming. Yeah, there's that footage of them in that Hard Day's Night doco where it's them at some massive baseball stadium in the States. Yeah, Shea Stadium. Yeah, and people there are like,

this sounds like absolute shit. We can't hear a fucking thing. It's coming through the like... The announcers thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like when you hear... Like if you were at the baseball then and you hear the... That's the quality of sound you were getting from the Beatles

playing long-pulled sound. Yeah. Because that's around the time that the Grateful Dead are like, we've got to make our own rig. Like they had their own speaker rig. Have you watched that doco series on the Grateful Dead? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, they talk about Jerry Garcia like putting together this wall of sound.

Yeah, him just sketching it out and being like, what about this? Yeah. Someone make this for me. And it was huge and they had to transport it. But yeah, so first of all, they were using fucking transistor radios and stuff sitting at the front of the stage. It was absolutely dog. That's why the Beatles stopped touring because they're like,

why bother doing this? We're too big for the infrastructure of live music. Man, they missed out. I know they did fine. They missed out on being at the end

of a Sam Taunton comedy special. But like, God, if they were today, they would fucking do the biggest stadium. I have this great bit

about one of your songs. But I only have 10 grand. I love submarines. Can I take a shit at the end of my show to Octopus's Garden? I have $3,000. Also, by the way, I should say that I get that the lead singer of Train was sceptical because a well-known thing, if you're not in comedy, is people making fun of song lyrics.

That's what comedians do. So you're never going to think it's me praising the band Train in a comedy special. We're in comedy, it's like, here's the punchline, how good is this? Pretty rare joke. I'm now just fixated on, okay, so 7K for 40 seconds of Drops of Jupiter by Train.

I want to know what we could get. What we could get with a budget of like five? You could get so much because that's like such a hard deal I have to broker. If it was an act that didn't really care that much, it's like you could almost... Who doesn't care about their music? Oh, some don't. It's got to be someone funny, but the song has to be like,

it can't just be like whatever. It's got to be like a song that... But what do you like in Hunters and Collectors? The guy told me they have that, because it's like a socialist thing, they all have a vote. Yeah. And so, you know how they had to use When the River Run Dry in a milk ad? Yeah. In a book ad.

Well, Mark Seymour didn't want it to be used, but they had a vote. He's against big milk. Everyone's like, no, we want the money. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So the trombonist is going, nah, fuck that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All the people who didn't write the song are like, fuck yeah, I've got no attachment to this.

Because that's the drink. Because that's what I would, if we could have a song that is the flagship of this pod, because like you're saying that Tina Turner's simply the best thing. I'm of the age where I still now just associate that song with that ad. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And the same with like if anyone like young enough, you know, like you hear the song in the ad before you're

familiar with it. So if we could get a song that we attach to this podcast... Don't you have a song at the start of this podcast? We do. There probably are people that think that's legitimately our thing. Maybe we should approach Yellow Black to legally have that. They don't pay anything for it. We play like

six seconds of it. Why don't you do something in the flavour of the podcast, like the Bloodhound Gang or something like that? Oh, yeah. We hit them up. A comedy show getting another comedy song is like, no. Oh, okay. You want serious.

You want serious. Yeah, I want something serious. And then we can use that as the theme song. What about Hurt, the Johnny Cash version? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Dealing with a state. yeah within a state is not good because they're not like ah that's fine it's like no and they just want dollars for money yeah

yeah yeah unless they're you need a live artist yeah it's um well you know what my my old mates the avalanches they had they've got like a snippet of uh a beatle song on their second album but played by like a children's choir or whatever and they had to deal with Yoko they had to know yeah god nightmares handing you a come on oh yeah Sam taught in stationary exactly that's what it is like I think that's the go-to you have to do you pull out the stationery you write a handwritten letter and this is what it means to me and all this you gotta prove obviously you've got to prove because it's on the album. You've got to prove. So Yoko owns all the McCartney, the 50-50.

Yeah, her and Paul. So then they have to liaise when they want to sell off. But didn't they sell, didn't the Beatles sell their back? I think they bought it back. They bought it back. Didn't Michael Jackson buy it? No, I think you still, I think they still have some rights or whatever because it's literally, you know, I think a lot of some rights or whatever, because it's literally, you know, I think a lot of the money must go to Michael Jackson's estate,

but I think legally they still wrote it and they have copyright or something. Isn't it? No, you sell the whole thing. Like, that's why you get paid. Well, it's like Queen are trying to sell their true billion dollars right now. Yoko's just made a lot of money for fucking no reason then. No, but they might have it back. I think you're right

Maybe they have it back Or something I thought they bought it back I don't I don't know But the jig's up The jig's up slightly Because they're all selling

Selling off now Like Queen are about to sell Theirs for a billion Beaver Has anyone sold this stuff Because I think the tipping point There's probably only I don't know

Another decade Where you'll get huge Cash coming in And then Any money from And also I think a lot of people Are selling it A lot of artists are selling it a lot of artists

are selling it when they're 65 and stuff because it's like what do I give a fuck about the royalties coming in for another 30 years

I want the money now I want a new house I get a private jet now yeah yeah yeah exactly well speaking of beautiful prestige art and performances

and things like that I've got some news, guys. Something we've talked about on this show for literally years. Guys, there's been a social media update by a comedy promoter.

I'll read the whole thing. This is exciting. People have been saying that Hungry Jack's comedy was something that would never happen. Well, if things go the way we are hoping, we are hoping,

things might be about to change. Fingers crossed, new location and new state may be playing host to this if it goes well. Stay tuned. This is like the Olympics. Wait, what? So this is the guy... Winner is...

City's bidding for Hungry Jack. Yes. So for anyone who's tuning in I would love some context Because I don't know what's going on This is like Let's speak up for years Towards the beginning of the pandemic

Yeah, pre-pandemic isn't it? Yeah, a gig popped up on Facebook A guy running a comedy show In the Hungry Jacks At Spencer Street Station Really? Not even the good one Like the one towards the back

The one near the Skybus No, the other one There's another one? Yeah, the good one. The one towards the back. The one near the Skybus? No, the other one. There's another one? Yeah, there's one upstairs. Oh, wow. Not even the one in the good location. Well, most comedy rooms are upstairs. It makes sense.

Look, it's actually probably a better room for comedy. I can't believe I'm saying this. I won't give too much away, but it was actually huge. He was trying to get me to go in. He was on the Sydney one. He could vape up there. No one cared. Get yourself a whopper.

He was running the one at the Sydney airport. Charles Kingford Smith Hungry Jacks. That always blows my mind when I'm in Sydney and I get on Uber and put the airport in. Charles Kingford. It's like, where the fuck? What? It's just the airport. It's just the Sydney airport. There's no confusion. It's the airport in. Charles Kingsford, it's like, where the fuck? What? It's just the airport. It's just the fucking Sydney airport.

There's no confusion. It's the Sydney airport. It's like when you go through a nice suburb and the houses have little names on them, the little nameplates. It's like, what? This is such a bug on you. It's a wank.

Whenever it was, three years ago, this guy decided he was going to put Hungry Jack's comedy, wedger comedy gig in the back of Hungry Jack's at the train station all the all the red flags you can fit in one gig yep

live streamed as well wasn't it going to be at one point I think it was going to be live on Facebook right so yeah

that's so funny yeah it's either genius or it's like exactly yeah or it's obviously the most it's the other thing

oh it's the other thing yeah right okay I know the exact thing you're talking about so that was the idea we got obsessed with it very clear we were obsessed with the idea that like i'm pretty pretty sure that this would not have been cleared with hungry jacks any of the owners are hungry jacks this is just someone sneaking and this is at the very most it is someone going up to someone on the till getting a whopper meal then saying the way, can I come back and run a comedy gig here?

And them giving the change and going, here's your change. And them saying, I think that's a yes. Yeah. And then pushing on from there. Because no one in their right minds has approved a comedy gig at Hungry Jack's

on a Saturday night at the train station. Saturday, that's right. Primarily, I know it was a Saturday night because I was running a gig at the same time because I was very torn. You were worried. Do I ban in the gig?

Well, it's quite competitive. Yeah, yeah. Where were you running yours? At McDonald's, weren't you? Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, on the tracks. I just booked a bunch of open micers I didn't like and then said, there's the stage.

Dick dastardly comedy. Dick dastardly? So, yeah, it was scheduled to happen. We were very excited and then it got delayed. Yes. Dick Dastardly comedy Dick Dastardly So yeah It was scheduled to happen We were very excited And then it got delayed Yes It got canned and delayed

Oh no And this has now happened Eight or nine times Yes That it's changed dates Sometimes this has been Because we've gone into a lockdown Yes

Other times it's like We're getting close to the date We get the Facebook update And it's like Guys there's only two days to go And then it's like You get the notification Oh it's been delayed for three months You go Oh fuck it's happening, guys, there's only two days to go. And then it's like, you'll get the notification. Oh, it's been delayed for three months.

You go, oh, fuck, it's happening again. And the waves I've been through where it's like, there'll be a date where it's coming up and it's like, I've got nothing on that Saturday. I'm golden here. And then it's like, it changes and it's like, fuck, I'm away then. I feel like I've been up and down with this gig for, yeah, three years. It's like being in lockdown again, isn't it? Yeah. It's like they keep moving the goals.

Yeah. So when they're doing these updates, is this to a wide fan base? Like how many people? It's on Facebook. I've seen it. It's on the comedy forum group. Oh, so they're putting it in the comedy group. In the comedy room's hub.

And also as part of, you know, if you've clicked attending on the event itself, you get updates. And we've been talking about it a bit and sent it to friends and stuff. You guys should sponsor the gig. There's quite a healthy following on this event page. We should sponsor a Hungry Jacks gig. We should give a bit of money to Jacks. Hungry Jacks comedy brought to you by the Little Dum Dum Club. Yeah, yeah.

But no, this is my point because it says new location, new state. Well, if they're abandoning Victoria, if they're abandoning Melbourne, I think we take over the Melbourne. I think we either franchise it or I don't know whether we need to write a personalized letter to the organizer of Hungry Jack's Comedy and say how much will it take for us to get the rights to a thing you clearly do not have the rights to anyway. No, but you've seen all the hurdles.

What makes you think you guys are going to be able to successfully pull this off? Well, this is like the Beatles playing Shea Stadium just through the commentator's microphone. Yes. Us doing comedy

through the drive-through microphone. Fantastic. Yes. So I think, Tommy, I think it's right. I think we can take this over.

I think you can run this gig. Hungry Jack's comedy. All right. If it's a moving state, there's something. I think, yeah, look, I feel like when Adelaide

lost the Grand Prix to Melbourne, Adelaide were real salty about that. We can be like that. We can be the ones that bring Hungry Jack's comedy back to Victoria. I really want to know, though, where it's going and how this is being decided. How it got outbid. Is it just like the bureaucracy

of Victoria? They wouldn't let me get it off the ground. Dan Andrews Is that what he's pinning on Nanny State can't even run comedy In a hundred jokes anymore In this state Let's bring this to Perth Yeah

At the Premier's conference It was Mark McGowan's like I'm resigning But it could be a good way To go out So he hasn't said anything About where he's going

I reckon it'd be Adelaide You reckon Adelaide? Maybe Perth or something. It's Grand Prix Revenge. I think he organises from Adelaide. Yeah, maybe that's part of it. He doesn't want to stump up the travel costs of the Greyhound bus down to Victoria. Where's Hungry Jackson?

There's one in Highland Street, isn't there? There's one in Rundle. There's one in Rundle, yeah. Yeah, that big I mean That big dirty one I feel like I'm so attached To this one That I would travel

To see the eventual I mean A weekend in Adelaide Is always so fun Yeah exactly Oh well Maybe if we If we've got the rights

To the Melbourne Hungry Jack's Comedy Tommy Maybe we can write that Off as business If we travel over We have to go up And just sort of Shadow him for the night

And kind of see because we want the... Yeah, see how it works. Yeah. We need to get like the style guide, the like just make sure that we're doing it all properly. Fuck, imagine us just being at Hungry Jack's with the clipboards and just walking around writing stuff down. Do you guys want to get on?

Oh, God, no. No, no, no. We're not even here. Just we're in the background. Pretend we're not here. I would like to do a gig, like I would like to watch a gig whilst eating Hungry Jack's food. Yeah.

Like I could really see that working. Hey, there's been plenty of, you know, nights of my life where I've done and then watched a gig and then eaten Hungry Jack's afterwards. It's just like how do you combine it all into one experience? Yeah. It's like I do like the idea of, you know, we've all done normal gigs where it's like you've emceed and you get told, oh, bring your empties back at the end or whatever. It's like, thanks for coming and you get told oh bring your empties back at the end or whatever it's like thanks for coming to Hungry Jacks Comedy Whoppers are still

they've just come out they've just come off the grill right now if you want to grab one on your way out bring your plastic trays back to the yeah

we fixed the soft serve machine that's running again oh that's great yeah but there's a lot of Hungry Jacks' around the country and you know like how I mean it's not in Australia

but in the UK and America there's like franchise comedy clubs so it's like yeah the improv is franchise i think it's jungle junglers but it's like what if this takes off there's a lot of hungry jacks in australia and then at any given saturday night yes there's 75 comedy shows running in hungry jacks around the country there's two well there's like a hundred you get booked on the Hungry Jacks, so okay. No, no, no, what you do is if you're not sure, if they're not sure

and you're not going to headline or anything yet, it's like, oh, I don't know, I think you've only got about 30 seconds. No worries. You do the drive-through gig

tonight then. You're in window two. Normally it's closed, but we're opening it up for you. But also their Macs, they'll open up a franchise soon. You've got to do one or the other. You can't do both.

More rooms is good for comedy yeah exactly I like the idea that on Google Maps there's like we have the Hungry Jacks comedy show and then there's like

the Hungry Jacks restaurants and people getting confused people wanting a snack and going it's like oh these cunts are doing fucking material I like the idea

that this becomes so good that they just phase out the burgers yeah because Hungry Jacks it'll be a trivia question in 50 years Hungry Jacks originally started as trivia question in 50 years. Hungry Jackson

originally started as a burger joint. Yeah, it's bizarre. It used to be a burger place. A comedy club started as a place where you could get fries. Have any of you guys

ever worked at Hungry Jackson McDonald's? No. No, no, no. But it was in the Hey, not yet. Yeah. I worked at Grilled.

Oh, but that's so fancy. Yeah. Not the same, but. I did McHappy Day. Oh, you worked at Grilled? That's so fancy, Grilled. Not the same, but. I did McHappy Day at Deer Park McDonald's. Oh, it's bloody hard. They put me on the drive-thru. This is true.

And there was all ice on the floor. It was pretty dangerous. There was ice on the floor? No, just ice from the drinks. Because I kept dropping the drinks. Oh, yeah. What suburb? Yeah, Deer Park. Deer Park.

Yeah, that's a fair question. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, two different people came to the drive-thru and went, oh, are you working here now, mate? I'm like, no, it's McHappy Day. Yes. It's a true story. Yeah, it's funny that none of the other takeaway places

ever had their own version of McHappy Day. Get celebs to work. Get, like, you know, get some famous people behind the counter at Oporto. Like, Hungry Jacks don't do any, like, charity stuff, do they? Because, like, McDonald's this year, they've got Ronald McDonald's. Ronald McDonald's. Which is, like, amazing. Hungry Jacks are also one of the, like, really admirable ones

where they've never tried to have a pundit going healthy. Yeah. They're like, even KFC are like, I can get a salad with some little bits of chicken in it if you want. Yeah, they don't have it. Hungry Jacks are just like, they've drawn their line in the sand where they're like, nah, we're being real about who we are.

Double bacon deluxe Yeah exactly Go to Woolworths If you want salad Buy a lettuce Good luck What about this You were at a gig

I ran on the weekend Just you know I run Oh yeah yeah yeah Which hopefully You know once I message this guy We might be merging With Hungry Jacks

Yeah with Hungry Jacks I've I've heard a lot of You know You get punters which hopefully, you know, once I message this guy, we might be merging with Hungry Jacks. Yeah, with Hungry Jacks, yeah. I've heard a lot of, you know, you get punters that don't know our lexicon, our language for comedy. We take comedy seriously. We think, you know, you get in the eye of the hurricane, you think it's the most important thing in the world and you know all the terms, you know.

Yeah. There's the, you know, the emcee or the host, right? Yeah. That's what we... Or as a guy said to me once, how long have you been introducing other comedians for? Yes. The compere.

The compere. I like compere. That's cool. In the UK, there's an award. It can be compere of the year. That's fantastic. I'd love to win that.

Yeah, right. So, we've named, I think they're the four terms. Host, MC, compere,

yeah. Yeah, all that stuff. I heard a new one I'd never heard before. So, you were at the same gig, Taunce. It was Harley, Harley Breen. He was, compere, yeah. Yeah, all that stuff. I heard a new one I'd never heard before. So you were at the same gig, Taunt. It was Harley Breen. He was the compere. He was the compere or the host or the MC.

Someone came up to me at halftime and said, oh, I'm loving this show. Can you tell me the name of the commentator? Yes. Yes. Fantastic. Yeah. The commentator. There he comes, Sam Taunton. He's walking up to the Yes. Yes. Fantastic. The commentator. Here comes Sam Taughton. He's walking up to the microphone.

Yeah. Were they standing next to Harley while the gig was on and he's been like, this cunt's shit. No, no. No, just the commentator. That's funny. Was Harley doing any particular reviewing of each person's set? You know how sometimes the MC is like, oh, I love that bit that they did.

Yeah, no, I don't think so. I think it was just him announcing, you know, doing comedy then announcing the act. So I guess that's the commentator. Coming off the back and being like, oh, it was good, wasn't it? Give it up. Like a commentator does name the people who are playing. So I guess that's it.

And, you know, you're watching it, you're listening, you get pumped up by like. You tend not to talk over the top of the comedy though. So that's the crucial part. And you're watching it, you're listening, you get pumped up by like – You tend not to talk over the top of the comedy though, so that's the crucial part. That's the crucial part. Well, sometimes I feel like I watch comedian sets and I'll be with another comedian and I'll be commentating. Yes.

I'll be like, they're flatlining, they're bombing. Oh, they've got them back here. They're killing, they're crushing. So the people – I mean, maybe there is commentary. Maybe I was doing that to Harley and the guy was actually asking after me yes god nothing worse than being on stage and just being able to see in silhouette up the back of the room one of your peers leaning into whisper yes god up there with hearing oh it's new up there with hearing ben lomas laugh yeah well this will be this will be a tough job to book some commentators

for Hungry Jack's comedy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, speaking of commentating, Dave, I've got to give you an apology. Oh, what happened? I talked about this last week in a

Brisbane Live episode, but something that I've made fun of you about over the years on this podcast that I've now engaged in. I went to a wedding the other week

and I left midway through the wedding to do a gig oh wow you've O'Neill'd it and then came back came back

O'Neill famously did this at my wedding at your wedding oh charity gig charity gig wasn't a corporate you're talking about

my wedding I did say no to Chemist Warehouse that night to go to Carl's wedding but then I got I did say no to Chemist Warehouse that night to go to Carl's wedding but then I got I did this charity gig

there's no more selfless act in the world saying no to Chemist Warehouse that was his present to me by the way that's how they keep the prices so low doing charity gigs

so they know you left did they know you'd left or no so I so they had already the couple had already eloped. So this was just like the party. So this was more just like the kind of reception, relatively informal dress code.

And the gig was literally around the corner. So I thought, I'm all right here. I'll get away with this. And this is just an open mic? You're just trying some gear? Yeah, about the wedding. No, you're warming up for your best man speech at the wedding just that's actually such a good idea you just go run it before and you're just in the moment

that'd be great yeah hey everyone put down your onion rings yeah your burger's coming in a minute here comes my best man speech i'm trying it out at the train station so i yeah i i had kind of assumed what i had heard from people was like, it's just going to be a party. You know, it's like they've done the whole thing. There's not going to be like, you know, the ceremony or anything like that. They've signed the papers. They've done the like official part of it. Yeah. So I kind of was led to believe like super informal.

And then I get there and people are talking about like, oh, the speeches are going to start at a certain point. And then I'm like, well, how do I play this? Because I've got to leave at a certain time. I can't like, I can't be seen just leaving during the speeches, but I also can't have them go, hey, guys, we're going to start speeches and then just be seen legging it out the door. And especially depending on where the door is,

whether it's near the speeches or you can sneak out the back or whatever. Have you told anyone you're zipping out? No. I've confided this in one friend. Okay, yeah, because you're probably right not to, because often you can just, no one's paying attention of everyone's movement. Yeah.

Especially at a wedding. Yeah. I know it's a very comedian thing to think, oh, everyone's going to look at me. It's like, can't. We're looking at the person getting married and the speeches and stuff. Yeah, I just, I really was, yeah,

like I didn't want to, yeah, I mean, it's rude. Yeah. It is incredibly rude. How far away is the gig? The gig is like a 10-minute walk. Oh, right. Yeah.

That's pretty good. And it's for Chemist Warehouse? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just had to go and get some medicine from Chemist Warehouse before they closed. That was the gig. And I was like riffing with the cashier. So, you know, you're never not performing.

You add it to your gig total for the gig. You're like, I've got a few laughs. But yeah, just like being so stressed. And I did tell this last week, but I thought you'd appreciate this, Dave. At the end of the night, I got introduced to friends of the bride who listened to this. Oh, wow. So please don't fucking rat me out

that I'm talking about your friend's wedding. Too late. And they were a couple and got introduced to them both as like, oh, they're big, big fans.

The guy immediately is like throwing the girl under the bus. He's like, ah, she's the, you know, she's the big fan. She watches all the videos

you do for your video game podcast. I'm like, oh, okay. And then I'm chatting and I'm like, I'll let you guys in on a little secret. I actually, I actually just ducked out to do a gig and just podcast. I'm like, oh, okay. And then I'm chatting and I'm like, I'll let you guys in on a little secret. I actually just ducked out to do a gig and just came back.

And the guy goes, ah, Dave O'Neill style. Yeah. All right, this guy gets it. I've become a trope. This guy gets it. I love it. Wow, wow, wow. Let's clean this up from last week as well.

On the live show last week, Harley Breen, at that wedding that you were at, that you nipped out of, Harley Breen was on my list. Gave you one later. Yeah, yes. Harley Breen was on the notorious list of people, comics that came to my wedding.

No present. Didn't bring a present. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Big list. Harley Breen made good last week, gave me a ticket, a plane ticket to Bali. I was quite drunk on stage,

I would say, at the time last week. He just gave you a plane ticket. Yeah, yeah. Made a big presentation, got off the stage and went, you know that's not real, don't you? I was like, no stage, I would say, at the time last week. He just gave you a plane ticket. Yeah, yeah, he made a big presentation, got off the stage and went, you know that's not real, don't you? And I was like, no, I didn't. Really?

I was midway through that show going, now I know Carl isn't this good of an actor, so this isn't him playing along. So he gave you a fake ticket to Paris. What do you mean a fake ticket? Was it like a boarding pass? Yeah, it was like a... But why would you think a boarding pass would be real? It wasn't a boarding pass.

It was like, he's like, oh, I'd been to like a, you know, a travel agent. I'm like, I'm looking at it going, this looks like shit, but there is a logo on it. So I guess this is real. We should talk to him about this. Him talking about designing that ticket and like having to get the logo from like the flight center website.

And I think he talked to a travel agent to get it mocked up. It sounded like it took him a lot of time. He could have just bought a present in that time. I know. I know because after all that, still no present. He still owes me. Well, he probably could have bought a Jetstar flight to Bali for pretty cheap. Yes.

It would have maybe worked out in terms of the amount of time he spent designing it. He could have bought a a flight for the amount the match fee that we paid him for that gig to be completely honest so uh but the thing is he's like you fucking idiot how didn't you know it wasn't real i'm like i didn't like you've given it to me you've said it's real i've believed you it looks a bit whatever but he goes yeah but look it's so obvious and it's like say there's like 120 words on this counterfeit ticket to Bali. In fine printing, like seven point, there's like a rego number of it, and it's like 8717606969.

He's like, that's the dead giveaway. I'm like, cunt, it was like, what the fuck would I have known that? Come on, it was like... Oh, God. Why the fuck would I have known that? It's like a 12-digit number with 6969 at the end. It's like, oh, fuck, I'm so gullible. Well, this is all tying back in because you've just given me an idea for an incredible...

I wish this wedding had been coming up that I went to because incredible wedding gift. Hey, for you and your beautiful bride to start your new life together I've gotten you uh 40 seconds of drops of jupiter I've got you I've got you the rights to 40 seconds of drops of jupiter to use however you want you can drop it over the wedding video if you want or you can just save it up for like your kids first steps or like however you want to use it if, you use it. You can drop it over the wedding video if you want, or you can just save it up for your kids' first steps or however you want to use it. If you guys ever want to get into comedy,

you can use it as a closer on your special. That's good. That's a good gift. If you ever want to go in partnership with me and my friend Carl, we're going to run Hungry Jack's Comedy. We're going to play Drops of Jupiter at the end of every show.

Yancy has to sing along. Can yous of Jupiter at the end of every show. MC has to sing along. Can you pop it in at the end of this podcast? Yeah. Can you check your rights? Yeah. Do you only have one usage? Yeah, that's so interesting. Or if you've only used like 30 seconds of it in the special,

have you got like a spare 10 that we could just chuck on? Yeah. Yes. I think you can use 15 anyway. I think it's 15. You can use 15 without paying it. So you can take 15. But I'm probably not using the whole 40. Yeah, great.

So I'm happy to give you guys another 10. Then you get 25. This is like percentage points on movies. I like this. You can just share them around. Yeah, that's great. That is good if you were a musician that had had like a hit song. That's your wedding gift to people is just like, hey, great.

You can have the song. You can use the song however you want I'm giving you carte blanche that's my wedding present from now on you can use

Little Dumb Dumb Club whatever you want you can use Duck Sandwich it's yours you can break that out of parties and say that you came up with it

alright well we better wrap it up there for another week on the Little Dumb Dumb Club Dave O'Neill Sam Taunton thank you so much for joining us Dave O'Neill thank Sam Taunton, thank you so much for joining us. Dave O'Neill.

Thank you. You've got a bunch of podcasts that people listen to. Sure. Somehow related with Glen Robbins and the Junkies with Kitty Flanagan. Yeah. And Debrief, I haven't done for a while, but it's coming back. Hell yeah. And Debrief is a podcast that you do after you've done a gig with someone.

You drive home. So great episode coming up after you do Hungry Jack's comedy. Yes. At Spencer Street Station. Oh no, Hugh's asked me to help him run his open mic in Sydney on a Tuesday night. I'll be doing both of them.

Long drive from Bondi. From Bondi KFC. Yeah. And so you've got a special that you can, even if you don't like Sam Taunton's comedy, if you like Train, you can definitely tune in and you can watch it

yeah watch it just to see how I use my drop the Jupiter like my heart we've heard all this and then you watch the special and the bit bombs

and then the song comes in yeah so if you've got no I've recorded it it did fine it's all gonna make sense you've got what 30 seconds

no how long did you 40 you've got 40 seconds so if you give us 5 seconds of it technically we've got a what, 30 seconds? No, how long did you... 40. You've got 40 seconds. So if you give us five seconds of it, technically we've got a drop of Jupiter, I reckon. A drop of Jupiter, yeah. Oh, yeah.

Do we have to, like, can I just put in whatever bit of the song or I've got to liaise with you about the exact segment? Can we double up? Oh, no. So, yeah, no, I did. No, it is annoying, actually, because it's like I asked this question as well.

I was like, can I chop and change my 40? So use, like, this intro and then take it but you my 40 start wherever i started it's got to be continuously 40 so what i'll have to do is but i think if i've got yeah 40 i'll go to my 35 second mark and then you guys get okay so i'll take from 35 seconds into the song yeah yeah yeah okay alright oh no but I'm gonna start on the chorus

oh yeah okay yeah he you tell us where you stop and then we take your little off cuts at the end yeah and then that's our new thing

a little bit of a depressing song it's also five seconds is so quick it's like tell me I did the wind okay welcome to the little Dundum Club

hey mate so when that'll come out next couple of months or something? Yeah, yeah, in a few months. Maybe next month, I think. Oh, really? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just got sent an edit today. I haven't looked at it.

Can you say where on? Because I know, and I assume you know. Are you allowed to announce what it's on? I think, I don't know. Yeah, it's on Paramount+. Okay. Yeah, and so if you're one of the four people in the country with Paramount+, enjoy it. Yeah, I've got it.

Yeah, I've got it. I've seen Hughie's one live from an open mic night on a Tuesday. I've got that one. Yeah. If you've been watching Yellow Jackets, you'll have it. Oh, Yellow Jackets. If you're a big South Park fan, you'll have it. Yellow Jackets is great.

We're releasing a soon-to-be-filmed special live from Hungry Jacks Comedy at Spencer Street Station on Paramount Minus. Oh, Paramount Minus. Not as good. Well, I think on release night, I'm going to do a live stream of Harley Breen commentating it. Yes. Great, great, great. Yes.

All right. Thanks very much for listening, and we'll see you next time. See you next. See you, Puffs. And they've done it again. Yes. Bernard absolutely pulled a hamstring doing it again. Yes. Bernard. Absolutely pulled a hamstring doing that one.

Yeah. The episode that almost didn't happen because I saw you yesterday and just mentioned something offhand about see you tomorrow morning and you were like, isn't it at 9.30 at night? Yes. And I just was thinking all day. I'm like, if that brief interaction hadn't have happened, we'd be living in a reality where I'd be sitting here with Taunton O'Neill at 9.45am texting you being like,

brother, you far off? Yeah. And me doing a bit of bench pressing, going, what? Am I far off from my goals? Yes. Yeah? Yeah. I would literally be in at the gym because it would have been me dropping the kid off at kinder today

and then going to the gym afterwards and then going, sorry, man, but these pythons are more important than that content. Yeah, lucky. That was very lucky. So, yeah, Fun App. Yeah. Hmm. Uh, much more to say?

What's going on? Oh, look, full disclosure. This is, this is a good feeling. We are probably about 45 minutes off a very good feeling, Tommy Daslow, where we have three weeks of content in the can. Yep. Three regular episodes, three talking dum-dums, three weeks worth of bonus episodes. Yep.

Three talking dum-dums, three weeks worth of bonus episodes. Yep. I'm getting on a plane to go on holidays in two days. Yeah, so this is what happens when one of us goes away or whatever, we have to stockpile it. So, yeah, nice little feeling of we're in front of this until I land and it's like quick, we need an episode. Quick, straight back. Yeah.

Yep. So, but nice little feeling to think we don't have to raid the content mines for a little while. No, I was feeling pretty light on this morning. I guess I'll talk about that wedding thing again with Dave. That'll be something. He's actually in the room. Yeah, that's all right. You had another little thing.

I am, yeah, so I'll already be there. I think I might be i i am uh yeah so i'll already be there i think i might be on my way no i'll still be there i'll still be on i'm going on a little thailand um i hope you're sitting down for that little thailand holiday uh hopefully we will do a little bit of for you patreon subscribers or potential patreon subscribers we might be doing a little bonus episode while i'm there where you're here and i'm there uh that might be doing a little bonus episode while I'm there, where you're here and I'm there. That might be fun. But yeah, if you're, even though,

even if you're not one of those person, there might be a bit of content on the Instagram and Facebook or the social medias. I'm sure I'll have something crazy to talk about next week when I'm back. It's a funny old life, isn't it? Yeah, it's, funny old life isn't it yeah it's uh i'm going to i've really recently discovered that i'm going to uh phuket and it's not a good time to go there oh really how come because i so this is june so i always go to samui in june and this year

because i'm going with the family i'm like uh you know the the go to Samui, it's not direct. You've got to stop over at Singapore, Bangkok, whatever it is, Malaysia. And, you know, there's a three, four-hour stopover, blah, blah, blah. It's all a bit, you know, complicated. So we thought, look, let's just go on a cheap, quick holiday, nine hours direct, straight to Phuket. Yep. A lot easier that way. Yep.

Great. Oh, I'll go inune when the weather's always perfect well it's on a different side of the country tommy to kosamui yep kosamui perfect weather phuket it's the rainy season starts right now oh yeah so i've just been glued to the fucking weather apps and just watching how many mil is coming in and i i literally have rung my mom twice to go because she lives on a farm, she's like obsessed with rainfall. Of course.

So I get not obsessed with it, but like say I'm at home with my wife and there'll be rain. I'll be like, oh, that's cool, isn't it? And she's like, I don't care about rain at all. Fuck the rain. It's bad. Yeah, it's a bad thing. It stops me from going out of the house. Yeah.

It's fucking our washing up. Yeah. It's bad. I'm going, no, you need rain to survive. If you're on a farm, it's a complete, changes your relationship changes your relationship to rain yeah so she's like you're a farmer boy freak i'm like i'm not but my parents are literal like yeah rain oh my god how good is rain so i'm like saying like it's coming up and i'm saying this is how much rain so you're calling your mom and being like you'll love this yeah it's raining in phuket right now in two weeks time

yeah no i'm like oh this is how much's going to rain on our third day on holiday. And she's like, wow, that's great. And I'm like, oh, is it? Is it great? She's like, yeah, you're going to be underwater. That's heaps of rain. I'm like, that's actually bad. Yeah, we're on a holiday.

That's not the use of the word great that I would use. We're not going to Phuket to run a farm. Yeah. We're going there to have a holiday. I don't care about how much hay they grow in Phuket. I'm going there to jump in the pool and the beach and stuff like that. No, I do. I have a similar thing where I just assume you're talking about another country that you're going to,

and I stupidly just think, well, the weather there is the same in the whole country. Yes. Like I'm going there. Yes. It's our winter. It's another country. So I'm planning a little trip's our winter it's another country so i'm planning a little trip for end of july to vietnam oh learning that very quickly it's like we're looking where to go and it's like oh up that part yeah it's different and i'm like yeah but it's a four-hour

flight away how can it be different it's like cunt you were just in brisbane yes yes it was raining here and it was sunny there it's four hours between melbourne and perth yeah exactly yeah there's no we get snow and hail here i don't think that's ever happened in perth yeah my parents live a 45 minute drive from me and they're like it's raining today and i'm like no it's not yeah and i can't wrap my head around it being a different climate in a different part of another country yes i'm like no that's where i'm going on holiday yes it has to be sunny the entire time for me while i'm there yes what's the dude oh fuck actually this this really annoys me about don't say her name she this is how when she's talking about the weather and she asks me like she'll be getting changed in the morning and she'll need to know what to wear that day right

she will say to me what's the degrees today? I like it. That's not how you say it. I like that a lot. What's the degrees? It's not what's the degrees. What's the weather like today? What's the Celsius?

What's the temperature going to be? What degrees is it? It's not what's the degrees is it? Yeah. I did the most booming thing. But anyway, yeah. So I've been, I said to my mum, I'm like, what about this? She's like, yeah, we would love that sort of weather.

I'm like, fuck. There's like so much. There's going to be literally at least two days where it's like, fuck, we better upgrade a room or something because we're going to be stuck inside. Yeah, a little blanket's going to be hitting that kids club pretty hard. Absolutely. So your mum, if they were on a holiday like that

where they're trying to get out of the country, escape winter, get some sun, they just would be looking at the rain. They wouldn't be bummed out that they're wasting a day of their holiday. They'd just be thinking about those Thai farmers that are up in the hills near Phuket being like, well, it's good for them. Yeah, maybe. So I'm not too bummed out. Maybe because it's not like – well, neither of them are jumping like running down the fucking beach Baywatch style or anything like that. I think they'd be pretty happy. Like I said this years ago, but like my old man, when he first got on the plane and flew

over there, he didn't go to sleep. We did an overnight flight. He just listened to the engines. I was like, that's pretty cool. Yeah. Is it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I did.

So I'm going with my girlfriend and a friend of ours. And our friend was like, heard that there's like really good cruises in Vietnam. So you do like a three day, you go through like Ha Long Bay. They look really nice. And so me and my girlfriend were going out for lunch over the weekend to the pub. And she was like, oh, why don't we look at some cruises while we're there? So sitting at the pub on the iPad, looking up cruises.

The most boomer I've ever been. The combo of the cruise on the iPad looking up cruises. The most boomer I've ever been. The combo of the cruise on the iPad is like, oh, this is like 80-year-old stuff. Is that a normal thing to fly into another country and then do the cruise? Well, it just goes from Hanoi. It takes you around the bay because it is an interesting thing to get my head around because someone says cruise here and you think, yuck, no's like now you're on a nice boat it's like taking you to like cool little villages and stuff you're on the deck going through this like beautiful scenery that you're just looking at from your little balcony so it's like all right this does

look pretty sick so are the cruises in vietnam like they are in australia what from what the knowledge i know of cruises in Australia yeah my point being when you go over there is it going to be a particularly hack Vietnamese comedians on your cruise this did cross my mind anywhere else this did cross my mind I'm like I wonder if I could like get out the company and be like hey uh what if we get a free room exchange from me doing a show wow and you're going to a vietnamese kid show on top of that right right right no swearing yeah fluid vietnamese yeah because i mean the cliche here is that from what we've heard from our friends and stuff is like you do a cruise ship you do

and then um you do a normal show you do maybe a gala show you do a kid's show for some reason they whack in there where you just don't you do all you you're unrelatable to four-year-old kid show but you just don't say cunt in the middle of it all of a sudden that's that's turned into a kid show yeah and then the rest of it is you know you're walking around the ship as the cruise comedian and everyone's sort of coming up to you and talking to you it's like imagine having just a bunch of vietnamese people coming up and like either like smashing you or praising you for your comedy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because the other thing that you hear about the cruise is on some of them, you're doing a lot of shows and it's all the same audience coming back.

So it's like you're cycling through three hours worth of material. Me having to commit three hours worth of my material in Vietnamese to memory. I like that I assume it's just Vietnamese people on this cruise. Yes, yes. And also it's like – Just locals. It's also – it's like, yeah, and if you're doing it here, it's like, yeah, I'm doing this show for free because I'm getting a free cabin and it's like awesome.

Yeah, it's like, oh, okay, I'm doing this Vietnamese cruise. Yeah, I'm getting a free cabin. Normally I would have had to have paid $7. Oh, yeah. But because I'm doing this gig, this gig for an hour, it's free. Getting some pretty crazy looking rooms on these boats for not much money at all. Oh, really? Should be good.

Yeah. Right. Yeah. Well, I look forward to, in July, banking 1,700 episodes, returning the favor. I know. I know. We got, I think it'll be like a few weeks and then I'm gone for two. It's all right.

It's not like straight away. Yeah. Well, I'll just look um i'll make it easy i'll go to thailand and i'll get drunk and i'll do a lot of fucked up things yeah we'll have a couple we'll have a bunch of episodes great to uh to fill up with all that bullshit great yeah i'll be at night i'll be like honey sorry i know we should all you know stay in the same room together at 8 o'clock, but you guys go to sleep. I've got content to create. Glug, glug, glug.

I'm ready, world. I'm walking around in the rain. I'm walking up in the middle of the road in the rain. All right. Well, of course, we need to thank some of the people that contribute to us being able to gallivant around the world on these uh luxurious holidays budget airline budget airlines third world countries yes taking the mick yeah uh patreon.com slash little dum-dum club thank you to everyone who supports the show if you don't already get on

there it's uh it's not much money and you get two bonus mini episodes per week to say thank you and you get to support this artistic endeavor that we do. That's it. We're like a streaming service. We're like, you know, get rid of Amazon Prime. Yeah. That money's going to a billionaire. Yep.

Just we cost the same. Succession and barrier over now. Yes. So you can fuck off binge. Yes. You don't need that. Boom. Instead of going to, what's his name? God, they must be fucking panicked.

What's Amazon's name? What's his name? Bezos. must be fucking panicked. What's Amazon's name? What's his name? Bezos. Bezos. I call him Amazon. Instead of going to Bezos, it's going to two little sweet urchins that you know. Yeah. Yeah, isn't that nice?

Thank you to everyone who currently subscribes. To a lesser degree, people who have described and do not subscribe anymore. But in particular, big thanks this week to people who I'm about to read out and give their special little moment in the sun to them right now. And then I'm going to go get lunch. Well, hopefully a moment in the sun. Hopefully it's not raining when they get their moment. Well, if you like...

I think it looks like it might rain over the course of us doing this. If my mum subscribes, she'll like this moment in the rain. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Thank you very much to Patreon subscriber Michael Strube. Michael Strube. S-T-R-U-E-B-E. Strube?

S-T-R-U-E-B? Yeah, U-E-B-E. U-E-B-E. Yeah, I guess Strube. Strube? Strube? I'd love it to be Strube. Strube is good. I doubt it. Yeah, I guess Strube. Strube? Strube? I'd love it to be Strube. Strube is good.

I doubt it. Yeah, I would doubt too, but my fingers are crossed. Strube. Strube. Strube. Strube. Strube. Strube.

Strube. Yep. Yep. I'm getting a Strube snack after this. It's called lunch. Have you shown your kid any Scooby-Doo? Oh, good question. Any Scooby-Doo?

Oh, good question. If Scooby-Doo is on Netflix, she'd be a massive chance of it. Of having sniffed it out? Yeah, because she's gone all the way through it. Yeah, I wonder. I mean, I know, I think Scooby-Doo is Warner Brothers, which would probably be binge. Okay, then no. Would be more likely.

We really struggled to get Bugs Bunny. Bugs Bunny is really, I think I've talked about this before, but it's really hard to get any good Bugs Bunny on the streaming platforms. Because there's like new ones that they've done. Don't want them. New little Looney Tunes shows, the classics.

You can get the, I think we've talked about this, but you can get the bad old shit animated ones where there's allusions to Nazi Germany within them and all that sort of stuff. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. But you want whatever the peak Mel Blankey is, whatever it is, the 50s, I guess, maybe. You want that really sharp animated, those ones. I'm sure there's some collection of them somewhere.

Again, maybe on Binge because it's Warner Brothers is HBO. HBO owns Warner Brothers. Right. I think even on Binge, I think I looked it up and I was like, oh, this is hard to find. Yeah, right. Yeah, I think you had to pay extra. Maybe it's on – anyway.

Once upon a time – If someone knows, actually let me know. This is the sort of thing that people respond to. Yeah, you can get DVDs of them. They did like – ages ago they did these like deluxe golden era Looney Tunes DVD box set things. And I think it may have been a thing where the historians got up in arms over the fact that, yeah, Donald Daffy Duck doing the eyes wasn't included as part of it.

This is meant to be a historical document and it's like, yeah. I should get it because the thing is we watch, we're at the moment we watch Who Framed Roger Rabbit a lot. Oh, best. Yeah, but the peak moment really is the first three, four minutes, whatever it is. That's just a cartoon. It's just a cartoon. It's like, that's what gets you into the world of Roger Rabbit.

He's basically, you know, a ripoff of Bugs Bunny. Yep. He's doing this crazy, you know, opening thing where they, and then at the end of it, they go, cut. Ah, Roger. Blah, blah, blah. It's like they're filming it. Well, you know, they made like and then at the end of it they go cut ah right action blah blah blah it's like they're filming it well you know they made like three or four more of them well so my point being she we just rotate that a lot like she really just wants to watch that yeah so it's like okay well we need more bug bunny then that's true well yeah and i mean the rest

of that film it's like yeah it's not gonna it not going to track for a four-year-old. She's still into it. It's like crime noir. Yeah, there's little cartoons and stuff. But the end particularly with Judge Doom where he's like dipping the shoe in the acid and stuff. That's not good. I was a bit worried about that. It's pretty fucked up, the ending.

But yeah, I think around the time the movie came out, they made like four other Roger Rabbit shorts that are three minutes long that they put at the start of the Indiana Jones movie or whatever that was out at the same time. And they're on the DVD. They're probably on YouTube. They're out there somewhere. I did get into it because after I was watching I was like, I'm going to go deep diving on this

show. What happened? Why isn't there a second one? Development hell. They tried for ages. That's in my top five of favorite movies i reckon wow i fucking love that movie so much i haven't watched it since it came out and i've probably watched it at least five times in the last two weeks the bit where they're in the cab uh the little the little talking cab yeah talking taxi oh yeah where there's like the chase scene yeah yeah where he's like. Where he's like, you know, it's like this cool chase scene, but then you've got this very funny character of the talking taxi. Yeah.

Where he's like, pull the lever. And they're like, which lever? And the little thing comes up. This lever's stupid. It's good stuff. I haven't seen the end as much as I've seen the first half of it. Even that bit's great. Yeah.

No, it's all good. The bit where he goes into Toontown and he thinks he's found Jessica Rabbit. Oh, yeah. Because of the silhouette. He's just seen like big hair and big tits. Yeah. That's her. Yeah. Oh, it's all good. The bit where he goes into Toontown and he thinks he's found Jessica Rabbit. Oh, yeah. Because of the silhouette. He's just seen like big hair and big tits. Yeah. That's her. Yeah.

And then like, it's just like the ugliest girl that they could draw. With huge tits. Yeah. That's like, I want to fuck. Yeah. And like chases him. And then he's like, I got to get away from her. So he pulls up the white line in the middle of the road and puts it into a wall.

Yeah. And then she just runs as fast as I can and just smashes herself unconscious. Yeah. And her tits go sideways either side of her body. Yeah, that's right. Yeah. Really good stuff. The little, the dueling pianos of Daffy and Donald in the nightclub.

Tell you what. I couldn't believe what I was seeing at the time. You couldn't. I mean, that would be part of the development hell it would be in because I think Spielberg pulled some favors to get all that, you know, the mix of Warner Brothers and Disney and all that sort of shit together. Yeah. I don't think – I think that would be considerably harder these days.

Well, now considerably harder for something like that to exist in the sense of having, yeah, these two competing things. But now because so many companies just own every other company like disney owns like fox and marvel and like what uh like they you know disney have like absorbed so many other companies yeah so the version of it now would be like you go into toontown and it's like yeah mickey's interacting with homer simpson Boba Fett and stuff. That was like the Space Jam movie had like – the new Space Jam movie had like Austin Powers and like Rick and Morty in it. Really? It was just like, oh, this sucks. Oh, I didn't know that.

Because it's like they're all under the umbrella of Warner Brothers. For free. So you can – it's easy to cross that stuff over now but in a much less interesting way where it's like no one's truly competing anymore. It's like, oh, we own – yeah uh we own bob's burgers yeah so we'll have uh bob's burgers is uh helping eddie valiant solve the crime with roger rabbit well strube strube doobie do um michael strube uh i liked how the voice of who's the voice of shaggy? It's not still him, but it's Casey Kasem. You know how that's, who that is? Do you remember, do you know who that is, Casey Kasem?

Very vaguely. He used to do the top 40, the American bandstand top 40, whatever, on the radio. And it would get piped into our radio stations, whatever. So you'd hear that voice. But then it's like, oh, that's funny that that's Shaggy as well. Right. Especially because he was still voicing Shaggy as like a 70-year-old man. Like, I mean, much like I guess Nancy Cartwright is like a girl and Bart Simpson,

and now Nancy Cartwright, she must be nearly pushing 70 actually. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What would she be? I'm looking around. I remember early days of The Simpsons. That was like the craziest piece of trivia. And get this. Bart's actually voiced by a girl.

Yeah, 65. 65, wow. She's also a big Scientologist, I believe. Is she really? Yeah. Interesting. So a big bunch of her cash is going towards fucking, what's his name? Theton?

Oh, is that the planet or whatever, isn't it? Yeah, I don't know. The race of people. I can't remember. Yeah, that's funny to think like that Casey Kasem doing Shaggy when he's like 70. I mean, that'll probably be the guy from Custard with Bluey. I think he's just going to be,

Bluey will just exist for the rest of time at this point. Yeah. I watched a full episode the other day. I've never really sat down and watched it. But yeah, it's all right. Yeah. Some pretty adult sort of themes going on in there. Yeah.

We had an artist for that show at our gig in Brisbane. A what? Someone who works on that show was at our gig in Brisbane. Right. What are you looking up? I'm trying to... You're trying to subscribe to Scientology? Oh, yeah, I'm trying to sign up.

Patreon.com slash Scientology. They should. If they could get people in that way, they just have a Behind the Paywall podcast. It's $5 a month. Xenu. Xenu, okay. Yeah, that's all I was looking up.

I forgot Xenu's name. Xenu's the fucking... The big... The big boss month. Xenu. Xenu, okay. Yeah, that's all I was looking up. I forgot Xenu's name. Xenu's the fucking, the big... The big boss man. Yeah, yeah. The final boss of Scientology. The big alien. Yeah. The big fat fucking dumb alien cunt.

The big man. Yeah. Xenu was the extraterrestrial ruler of a galactic confederacy who brought billions of his people to Earth. Then known as T.G.A.C. Fuck, some pretty poor writing there, L. Ron Hubbard. Yeah. T.G.

Yak. Yeah. Jesus Christ. Anyway. Thanks, Shuby. Yeah. Scooby. Thanks, Michael Shuby.

Shuby dooby doo. Thank you very much to Patreon subscriber Ben Redondo. The way you're describing Scientology and everything, it does sound like, I wonder if there was a point with them developing the Marvel Cinematic Universe where they were like, you know what, this would be better suited to a religion. Yeah. Why don't we just make a church out of this?

Yeah. Instead of making 18 more movies. Yeah. I mean, we're getting people's money anyway. People could have been praying to Captain America. Yeah. Instead of Xenu. Yeah. money anyway people could have been praying to captain america yeah instead of xenu yeah going into a guy dressed like iron man and confessing to every sin that you've ever

committed fuck they record you it wouldn't be far off like why didn't they i mean i know they got john travolta to be in the big scientology movie why can't they get cruisy tommy cruise to be in a big scientology movie be in a you know some sort of marvel universe except a scientology he can be the main guy yeah i mean i'm sure there's theories about how that stuff is all lurking under the surface of like top gun and mission impossible right i'm sure there'd be people that are convinced like if you dig it's like you know cruz is putting in little he's putting in subtle little things about yeah i think he's smart enough to to separate because he knows that it's not a popular thing you don't need to get everyone on board yeah he is crazy

though yeah sure sure i think it'd be more yeah i don't know i don't know what could you sneak in there i mean i don't know even know what their fucking values are like yeah it's all just money that's the main thing isn't it speaking of names and movies um i watched best in show for the first time the other night i've watched it you ever seen that no it's got one of it's got a character he's kind of like a hillbilly kind of guy one of the great fake names harland peppers oh yeah just every time that came up on the screen i was like, that's a good fake comedy name. Yeah. Harlan Pepper.

Yeah. Well, that's like, what's the director that makes all the pretty looking movies, but there's not much going on in them. They've got a new one coming out now. It's called, what is it? It's about a missile or oh you're talking about wes anderson yes right i kind of i don't like his movies i think they're sort of dog shit but they're very pretty looking movies like he's got an aesthetic yeah you're in it he's a guy who like you're in or you're out yeah i think they're boring as fuck and nothing happens in them but and who cares about them but they're stylistically they're very beautiful.

But he's got a lot of good names in there. He really does. Yeah. I love him. There's all that stuff. He takes a lot of care with all the surface level stuff, but the rest of it's fucking, in my opinion, fucking awful. Right.

I completely disagree, but yes. He is a guy who's just like, he's not winning anyone new with anything he does at this point. Like he's got his style and yeah, you're into it or you're not. Ben Redondo, I like his style because he gives us money. But Redondo, I'm hoping he's Argentinian because that's where Redondo comes from. In my head, famous football player. He played in the games. Fernando Redondo played in the games against Australia when Australia was trying to get into the World Cup for the first time in 1 million years back in 1993.

Okay. And they beat us. So I'm hoping this is Fernando Redondo's son who's come to make good. trying to get into the World Cup for the first time in 1 million years, back in 1993. Okay. And they beat us. So I'm hoping this is Fernando Redondo's son, who's come to make good. I keep thinking you're going to say Ben Redacted. Oh, right. No.

Which would be a great, like, no, I don't want you guys knowing who I am. Well, look at that. It's obviously an Argentinian name because it's Fernando Redondo, who played for the Argentine football team. Or there's the, I've looked up Wikipedia, or the Argentinian canoeist. Okay. Also called Fernando Redondo. Canoeist. I'm assuming they're two different people.

Yeah. That's a lot of talent in one Fernando Redondo, to be a famous canoeist and football player. I could imagine canoeing being something that you're like, you just hit a point where you're like, I'm going to take this up and you can get okay at it. I wonder if it's one of those things where, you know, like if you want to be a famous footballer,

you have to be into it at fucking age, five, six, seven, whatever it is. I wonder if, what's the thing you can get into late? Well, that's the thing. I think canoeing is like probably pretty technical where you can just pick it up. I feel like, yeah, football, you do need a degree of of God-given ability,

like actual talent for it, on top of the practice and dedication. But canoeing, I would imagine one can just go, all right, I'm getting into this. No offence to any canoeists listening. Yes, no offence in case this is the son of Fernando Redondo, the famous canoeist. Not to say your dad's a hack, but. Yeah. Not to say that great work on the football playing,

but anyone could do it on the canoeing. Exactly. On the canoeing. Yeah. Yes. Yeah. But anyway. Wow.

I'm interested. I'm hoping we have. Maybe this could be our first ever Argentinian listener. You assume there's never been a single other one. Well, that we know of. I do assume. First confirmed Argentinian. Yeah, well, Ben, let us know.

Let us know if you're Argentinian. I mean, look, your first name is Ben. I was hoping for a little bit more of an Argentinian first name. A bit more spice. Yeah, than that. But let us know if you are in Australia or if you're in Buenos Aires. I do like the idea of people in other countries listening to us. I'm always a big fan of that. Yeah.

In fact, you know what? Was it last week we talked about this or the week before? When I hit up the guy that was on Instagram that put on, oh, Dum Dum Lollies or whatever. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Who he then found out was a model and the dance partner of Pamela Anderson on Dancing with the Stars. Yeah, in the UK.

And I just wrote him a message back going, how the fuck do you know Pamela Anderson? And then just left me on scene. Yeah, I did. I actually looked at this the other day after we did that. And yeah, your message being like, how the fuck do you know Pammy? It's like, he's rumoured to have dated her. He like worked with her.

It's like, no wonder he ignored it. It's like so aggressive. I was just so excited about it. That was before I dug deep. You sent the message before you did the due diligence of like looking into it. Yes. Yes. But anyway, if you listen to us, I don't think you'd be that surprised by me being that excited about it.

Well, that's the thing is that we've now – oh, yes, sorry. We've recorded that but we haven't put it out. Yes. Where we talked about him, where we're trying to work out whether he actually does listen. Yes. I mean, I could just send him a more polite message on Instagram. I guess that's the next step. Maybe I'll do that after this.

But Ben Redondo, thank you. Thanks to you. Thank you for making good. Your dad knocked us out of the World Cup in 1993, but you've come back to make good for not the Australian Soccer Federation, but the Australian comedy community. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, which I think is very nice.

Good for you. Thanks, exactly. Yeah, which I think is very nice. Good for you. Thanks, Ben. I hope, you know, I think more players and more siblings or more, what do you call it when you're a kid from the person? More offspring. Offspring, there you go. More offspring from the Argentinian team. You know, you should do more of that.

Thank you very much to Patreon subscriber Sophie Vassalo. Wow. Yeah. Any thoughts? You think you've seen it all. Any thoughts? It's the Aldi version of you, of Tommy Dussel, which is the Aldi version of Tommy Allsop.

Well, I guess it's probably more like I'm the Aldi version of her because we have to assume this is her real name. Yes. Unless she's made it up and i'm the i'm the fake i'm the knockoff you don't know maybe she took inspiration from you that's not bad she went you know what tommy allsop yep didn't want to use his real name for comedy yep thought i'd get a cool stage name so my name's tommy daslow she thought right my name's sophie smith yep what a boring name i've got to pep this up into the world of Patreon.

Mm-hmm. So she's changed her name just for Patreon, Sophie Vassilow. So this is cool because it's like my story now is that I'm named after this fake wine that my dad made up. Well, it's hard to be named after something that was named after you were named that. Well, that's my story. That's what I'm putting out there. And so her version is, so now it's like the trickle-down effect of like, yeah, my fake name is based on a podcast that I listen to.

And then now someone's got to be inspired by her and have a third equally shit fake name. Well, I think your story could now be, I'm named after a listener of mine, but I changed it. Yeah. And somehow, like, I come before that yes yeah yes yes yeah just doing one of those mc escher style um stories yeah yeah of how you got your name story is just so confusing that anyone who asks me then word gets around they're like don't look you can ask

him but it's gonna be the next 45 minutes of your life it's really not worth it yeah who cares anyway exactly yeah yeah um that's sophie sophie vasilo um well she must have had a let's say maybe she got into the podcast because of your name she went i've never heard of anyone with my name before. And this guy's really close. Yeah, or she's seen it on the podcast app and gone, well, that must be a typo. Yeah. That's embarrassing. Or she's heard someone go.

This must be my uncle's podcast. Did you ever hear this podcast with Tommy Vasilo and Carl Chandler and gone, what's that? Vasilo? Great. Yep. This could be a relation of mine. Yep. Just started listening and gone, oh, he fucking mispronounces his name a lot on this show.

Maybe I should just change it to Vasilo. If I just hit this person up and go, yeah, I'm just going to take your name. Yeah. It's close to my already fake name. Phonetically, as you're saying, it sounds similar. Yeah. If you heard it in like a noisy bar,

you'd think it was the same thing. Maybe her father passed away a long time ago and his name is Tommy Vassalo. Yeah. This is sort of like hearing from my dad every week. You're right. Maybe I could root Sophie's mum. Maybe this is like a family reunion every week that I'm kind of just butting in on. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah. This could be like a nice little moment between you and Sophie. And it's nice for Sophie To give us money Yeah In spite of the fact that Yeah I'm sort of

Pretending to be Yes I mean this is Maybe she just views it as like This is the equivalent of like The auntie sending Five bucks in the mail Yeah

As a birthday present Yes Like well I'm almost Related to this guy Yeah Or she was paying For the retirement home before She already had that money

Sort of like Saved away And then there was a there was a tragic accident um and then you're you're filling the hole in her heart yeah yeah and gone oh you can have the money for this the retirement home by the look of it cost five dollars a month but whatever okay yeah still yeah yeah not a great one but you only get two of the episodes a month. Maybe she just chucked him on a Vietnamese cruise ship. Oh, yeah. He just did laps of a bay or something. Like, yeah. Wow, that's a hell of a retirement home.

That would be pretty good. A cruise ship in Vietnam where you just see out your days just looking at some of the most beautiful scenery in the world. Yeah. Eating delicious food. Doing laps of How Long Bay and uh getting on the um on the uh all you can eat every morning yep yeah big buffets but i mean what a retirement buffets three times a day oh heaven plus tommy daslow doing vietnamese stand-up comedy every night

some of these cruises we looked up they've got like a little golf course on the top. Fucking hell. Jesus Christ. It's like bonus mini golf and it's like, I don't know, man. I can't imagine myself being on a cruise ship, like I said, in some of the most beautiful scenery in the world and being like, this is all well and good, but God, I could murder some fucking mini golf right now.

You know what this needs? More windmills and loop-the-loops. Do you want an update on my netflix um to-do list oh sure yeah yeah i've been inspired by last week to trim it down yep oh as in like oh an update on like things you've gotten through yeah yep i watched the um the pizza show that's okay oh chef's table chef's table yeah yeah that's okay i kind of think i've? Chef's Table, yeah. Yeah. It's okay. I kind of think, I've never watched Chef's Table, but I get the impression it's like a more boring version of Ugly Delicious. Yes.

I haven't watched that, but I would confirm yes, because it couldn't be much more boring than this show. Chef's Table is literally just the people sitting around having a discussion, right? Is it? Oh, no. No, it's not. Oh, okay. It's like the ones I was watching, it's like pizza, six parts on pizza, and you go, cool,

I love pizza. And then by the end, you're like, I don't know if I love pizza as much anymore. This is boring. It starts off as like, here's the pizza this guy makes. And then it turns into, of course, like any reality show or whatever, let's go and talk to this guy about his childhood. Oh, okay, right, right. Fuck this.

Show us more of the pizza. Well, Ugly Delicious is a bit more like – Ask the pizza about its childhood from this morning when it came out of the oven. Ask the pizza where it gets its ideas from. Yes. It's Ugly Delicious – Where does it get its toppings from? Ugly Delicious is more like here's the episode on pizza.

So we go to, you know, we go to like the guy who like makes the tomatoes in Naples that you like – Does that sound boring? No, but it's like we'll go to like the most highfalutin kind of version of it. Then here's a guy who's like rides really hard for Domino's. Then here's a guy in like Japan that's like put his own spin on pizza. It's like he'll go around to like four or five different places like in all different areas and just kind of see the different approaches that like different places have to like the one food.

I want more close-ups of pizza.'m gonna have to be honest there's plenty of that in there pictures of uh footage of people eating it and then going that was the best pizza i've ever had and then at the end a button comes up that says push this button and now this food will come to your house right now yes yes yeah that's what i want on uber eats the show yeah it's not a bad idea i'm sure someone's tried to pitch that. That would be great. I'm sure someone's working on that right now. That would be... The show where MasterChef, but you get to the end

and there's an option of just getting everything that you saw... Yes. ...cooked on that episode, brought around to your house. Home Shopping Network. Yeah. But with food. Yeah. Yes.

Why are we doing this? It's always amazed me... This is a great idea. It's always amazed me that those shows took off to the extent that they did because like australian idol you can watch the home shopping network but for food this is an amazing idea home food network yes yeah because australian idol you can watch and you can you can sit there and you can be like yes i can see that this person is singing well or not singing well yes but master chef it's like i've just always found it weird that people respond to it so much because you have a complete disconnect

from like they're tasting it and being like, oh, this is amazing. And you're sitting at home being like, all right, I guess I'll take your word for it. What do I know? You can't engage with it in the same way. Yes, I agree. But still people like it. It's weird to me.

On paper, bad idea. But you prove wrong. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. I don't know how it's taken off, but like, but yeah, if they, you know, if ratings start flagging, if they go, okay, well, yeah, we bring the, you know, everyone can get the food delivered to them. Once we get funny fellas up and we get a little working dog style empire happening, we pitch

the home food shopping network. Yep. It's just. After we have one successful show. Yes. We then pitch our own networkping Network. Yep. After we have one successful show, we then pitch our own network. Yes. Yep. Yes.

Well, thanks, Sophie Vassler. You don't get any percentage of that for being part of that. But I will say this. I also watched The Meg. Oh, yeah. Jason Statham. Any good? And The Big Fucking Shark.

It's a really cheap, cheap dumb b movie okay where you wouldn't even bother going hang on does this make sense or not because you just watch it go this show is fucking dumb as right why even why even question why even talk about this show yeah it's so fucking dumb and none of it would happen it's like a movie made in mexico or something right like it's just it holds up to no normal like even your big dumb science fiction and superhero movies you sort of go there's an element of like oh would this happen or not this show is just like this is so fucking dumb. Let's just forget we ever watched it. Right. Yeah. Anyway, there's a second one coming out. I think it might be out.

Yeah, maybe. Might have come out. Yeah. I might have a little look at it. So the two things that you've ticked off the list, you didn't really enjoy either of them. Yeah. It was fine.

I didn't mind seeing some of it, but I've only seen two Jason Statham movies, and that is that and... A Guy Ritchie? No. Wow. Mean Machine? No. Hmm.

No. The Transporter? No. Crank? Crank. Crank. Yeah. Never saw Crank.

Yeah, saw Crank. Which, again, is very... I'm like, all of a sudden I realise Jason Statham's just his own genre, because that was the same thing. Super dumb, slightly cheap looking movie that makes no fucking sense. Yep. So maybe that's him. Thanks Sophie and thanks Jason. Thank you

very much to Patreon subscriber Allison Gall. A-double-L-Y-S-O-N. Ooh. Yeah. Like a child spelling Allison. Oh. Yeah. Like a child spelling Alison. Yeah. Sorry, Alison, but your mum and dad were three and four years old when they named you. That's tough.

Yeah. That's really tough. It's hard to find out. I mean, it wouldn't be that difficult to figure out, say, if she's 18 and your parents just had their 21st birthday parties. You'd probably figure it out by now. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

That's how you spell Alison when you're a little child. If that's you, like if you're growing up with some fucked spelling of a name, surely at some point you're just like, you're just changing it in secret. You're just going, all right. And you just say, sorry, it wasn't me. I didn't change it. Down at the names office, they spell checked it. Yeah. And they fixed it.

Yeah. It had like that little squiggle line underneath it, like on my passport. Yeah. So we had to fix it. I did, I think, will it have, I guess it might have come out by now, but we did a bonus yesterday with Bron Lewis that people might have heard by now. Okay. Where she's talking about her kids having her partner's Polish surname.

Yep. And I just thought, my God, like what a life for just like every time you type that name out, spell it to people, read it to people. Yep. Fuck, that's rough. Well, you've got it. You got a bit of that. Yeah.

Every time anyone asks you about Daslo and you've got to be like, fuck, this is so not worth it. It's not my name. I have it with all sob. People think it's two L's. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So like, you know, that's annoying enough without it being like, oh no, this is,

my surname is from a language where W is pronounced differently. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, Lord. Yeah, tough work. The gall on this woman, Alison, to give us money. I appreciate that gall, actually.

Whenever gall's brought up, it's always negative, but I like the gall here. Well, we were talking about Asterix recently on one of these. Good gall? Oh, yeah. He's a good gall. Well, that's a G-A-U-L. Oh, sure.

This is G-A-U-L. Oh, okay. Right, the goal of her the gumption the goal of her to not be a little a little french comic strip yeah the goal on her to give however much money you give us but not even more but you know but we do appreciate it but there's enough goal is this is this meant to be like um maybe the name is something to do with like her dad thinks of himself as like the world's greatest feminist and so this name is meant to be said ally's son yeah maybe it's a guy there we go well in that case that's true the goal on that goal yeah right. This makes total sense now. This name was indecipherable when we got in here. Yeah, we figured it out. We figured out your little puzzle.

Don't worry. We circled it a couple of times. This is the dumbest and least transferable skill that you and I have built up over the last few years. Yes. Being able to hear any name and turn it into something. Yes. It's such an annoying thing to have gotten good at.

Yes. Because it's like it's not transferable in any way. No. When the Armageddon comes and they say, what can you guys do? Can you farm? No. But what's your name? And it's also-

That reminds me of this. Yeah. And it's also like a thing where most people would listen to it and think, this is boring and anyone could do it. But that's actually not the case. No. Go back and listen to this when we started doing this. Yes.

I bet we're just like rattling through them. Yes. Oh, yeah, thanks, Jim. No, totally. There are people that were like, we want a do-over. We were like early. But back then, you didn't call us a fucking cunt for our surname. Yeah.

Yeah. We want that now. Yeah. But Alison Gall, I think you've. The Allies' son. Yeah. our surname. Yeah. We want that now. Yeah. But Alison Gall, I think you've... The ally's son. Yeah. The Gall. Yeah.

The Gall on your parents to have that name. Thank you, Ali-son. And I'm really sorry about... Yeah. How badly... All of it. How badly your dad can spell. Yeah.

One more. And then we're free for the... – it's spring break, school holidays. Yeah, the bell's about to ring. Yeah, I'm about to burn my books, take off my school uniform and run naked into the street. Well, the annoying thing is that this is like the last day but we've spent it doing actually kind of like – we did a main app. Those are like the hard content ones. Typically, your last day at school is just an absolute washout.

You're doing fuck all. You're putting a movie on. We need a day like when I go on holiday. We need like a last day that's like the equivalent of that. We need to think of what the podcasting equivalent is of like last day of term. You know what we should do? Teachers are already one foot out the door. We should do.

We should deliberately record an episode but leave a five-minute insert like at the end. Just leave five minutes to go. And then the day before you go on holiday, we go to the pub. Just have a few beers and then in between. Oh, there's that five minutes worth of podcast. There's one name we didn't read out. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. From Talking Dumb Dumb.

Oh, we better do that at the pub. We better do that now. do that now yeah yeah that would be good that's our last day of work yeah just one name in talking dumb dumb yep we read that out have a few beers and then off you pop a real fucking take off the airport yeah that'd be good all right let's just do one more uh thank you very much to patient patreon subscriber Oh, wow. I've mentioned this before, but this is actually, I hoped for this. Off the back of Ben Redondo. Yeah. Thank you very much to Patreon subscriber Comedy Maradona. Oh, wow.

Yeah, that's pretty cool. Yeah. Yeah. So that must have been the child of Maradona from the Argentinian 1993 team. Yeah, right. Chucking us some money. And got this first name comedy. Yeah.

Right. The hand of God had like 10 bucks a month in it. Right, right, right. That's pretty cool. Yeah. Was holding a tenner. Beautiful stuff. Wow.

Yeah, that's funny. Yeah, that is good, isn't it? It's a thing. All right. You can't knock that. Now we are talking. Now this is real last day of term shit. This is six period, 3.15 in the afternoon.

Bell's about to ring. Teacher's like, I don't know, I'll just teach you how to spell cat again. Yeah. Well, in that case, this bit of the show every week feels like we're going on holiday, to be fair. Well, we kind of are for another week. All right, guys. Thanks very much for listening. And we'll see you next time.

See you, mates.