The Little Dum Dum Club with Tommy & Karl - 682 - Zan Rowe & Myf Warhurst

Episode Date: October 31, 2023

It's a Bang On crossover this week as we're joined by ZAN ROWE and MYF WARHURST! It's Zan's first time on the show but she's already had some legendary meetings with Tommy at a music festival and a kick-ons, plus we've received a hot tip about an item on her resume that's of great interest to us. Meanwhile, Myf has a new show on SBS that takes place in Maryborough - not sure if we've ever mentioned that that's where Karl's from - and so we take a further deep dive into the local weirdos from Karl's childhood. PLUS debutante dresses, nicknames and of course: pornos. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Today on the Little Dumb Dumb Club, a brand new episode with guests Zan Rowe and Miff Warhurst. We have a live show in Perth coming up this weekend, if you are listening to this hot off the presses, Saturday, November the 4th. That's right. Last chance, Perth, got some great guests. Get into it. Yeah. And then Melbourne, November 25th, Saturday afternoon, Tommy? Mm-hmm. Yeah.

LittleDumbDumbClub.com for tickets to that. Get along and see both those shows. We will talk to you more at the end of the episode in Talkin' Dumb Dumb. This is a great one coming up, guys. Yeah. Enjoy this one with Zan Rowe and Miff Warhurst. Hey, mates. Welcome once again into the Little Dumb Dumb Club for another week.

Thank you very much for joining us. My name is Tommy Dasolo. And with me is always the other half of the program, Carl Chandler. Yes, g'day, dickhead. And joining us today, two very special guests from Bang On, among other things, Miff Warhurst and Zan Rose. Risa Franklin and Beyonce have music punditry versus the proclaimers of stand-up comedy. I love this.

And we're all going to walk 500 miles together today. No, away from our gigs generally. Good intro. What I was going to go with was, what a treat for our two female listeners at home. I think I know them both as well. They're us, aren't they? We just said she was listening to our most recent episode the other day,

so that's one of them Yes That's where that spike was from I loved that episode too by the way It was one of the funniest things I've heard in a long time Oh thank you No you were laughing Well you might enjoy

We might get a little bit onto that The adventures of Blanket this week My daughter Who's obsessed with me shitting my pants or whatever Well actually we'll say this um she we might get into nicknames in this in this episode uh she has got look we have one child and my wife really wants this child to take after her to you know daughter and all the sense of humor and you don't want that no no no i'm fine. I'm fine with that. I want a little me. No, no, I'm fine with that.

I want a girl me. But that's what she's turning into, which is a bit of a concern even for me. Oh, really? Where she's just like, in the last couple of weeks, she's just gone, right. I don't know why, but she's become a real smart ass at like age four. And she's just out of nowhere. And I can't track it back. And I'm trying.

I'm trying to find out where this has come from. She's just decided that my name is Nugget. So everything around the house is like she walks in the door, hi, mum, hi, Nugget. And I'm like, it's not Nugget, it's daddy, all right? And of course, the more I say, it's daddy, she goes, okay, Nugget. And she will not let go of it. And she's just, she'll walk in, wake us up in the morning and go,

Nugget, Nugget, Nugget, Nugget, Nugget, N nugget nugget hi mummy nugget nugget nugget like this and it's and i cannot get her to get rid of it she was really sick the other day and i tucked her into bed and as she was passing out she's like she's like no no mummy buy nugget she had a fever and she was still committing to it i don't know. Where does it come from? I actually, I was going through. I was like, is this in Bluey? Is this in some children's episode?

No, apparently it's not. I should know, given I'm one of the characters. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. But maybe not. You eat, I mean, you eat a lot of McNuggets. I mean, you eat a lot of McDonald's, but you're not a nugget person. I'm not a nugget man.

You're not into nugs? No. No nugs? No. So I don't know where it's from. She's, yeah. Are you constantly making her watch that movie that Dave O'Neill's in? Yeah, but it's Takeaway.

Oh, okay. So not one. Damn. Okay, that still doesn't make sense. Gold nugget? Does she think you're golden? Well, no. No.

And you haven't asked her. You haven't gone, hey, quick question. Where did this come from? I have. I have. And she just goes, it's in my brain. So I'm like, well, I don't. It's a valid response, to be honest.

I should use that, actually. Yeah, it's in my brain. If I ever confuse someone, it's in my brain. Full stop. Yeah, yeah. That's where it all comes from. It's not coming from your arms or anything. I guess it tracks.

Yeah, it's true. So you've got to work backwards and try and remember the exact date that she started calling you this and then sort of piece together what you were doing in the days leading up. Yeah, you're responsible for this is what you're saying. I'm just like a true crime podcast. Yes. No, to get inside the mind of a four-year-old, like good luck.

Like it started three weeks ago. For me to go, what happened two weeks ago? She's like, I have no idea. Yeah, well, okay. Well, then we can go back even further because we're talking about, like you two weeks ago she's like I have no idea so yeah well okay well then we can go back even further because we're talking about like you're saying

she's taking after you so we're talking about a DNA issue so what would someone have to do around you to earn the nickname of Nugget you know what you know what would have

had to have happened I must have mentioned at some stage I don't like Nuggets so she would have gone okay Nugget she found a weak spot found a weak spot

she does take after you yes yes she's going for the jugular yes exactly okay that's amazing that's really clever There you go. Okay, Nugget. She found a weak spot. Found a weak spot. She does take after you. Yes, yes. She's going for the jugular. Yes, exactly. Okay, that's for you. That's amazing. That's really clever for four.

Yeah. Yeah. Gifted? Not in the right way. The child or the dad? Both of you. Yeah, no, I don't think anything that's going to get her a job. She could start up a podcast. That's about it.

You've got to try and sneak in some subtle references for a nickname for your wife. You've got to even the playing field. Oh, no, she loves her mum way too much. I'm just Nugget. Nugget, I love it. Well, Zan, it's your first time on the show. Yeah, thanks for having me.

I texted a mutual friend of ours and friend of the show tom ballard oh god to just say hey zan's coming on the show for the first time uh do you know any anything you know that you know about her that you know that might be good to bring up and i think this says a lot about the kind of show that we do here where tom said uh zan used to work at a servo. That's up your guys alley. It's true. Is that on your resume? I wish it was. It's not on my Wikipedia.

Not on the Wikipedia. The busiest service station in Australia as well. The busiest? The busiest service station in Australia. Now, how do you quantify that? It's got a lot of pumps. Right, okay. 40, but it's also in a- 40 pumps?

40 pumps. Wow. And it was in a high volume of traffic area so if you're listening in melbourne you know there's two servos they used to be shell servos they're a different brand now but they're right before or after the west gate bridge so i worked on those they're owned by the same people and i would move to different ones depending on the day we did the south one going out of the city towards geelong was always the busiest because everyone was heading out of town slash on the Westgate going all over the place.

Got to go to KFC and get some Dirty Bird while you're there. I had so many chips in my time there. And then the one coming into the city was a bit quieter and had a few less pumps. But it was incredibly busy. We put a lot of cash in those safes after every shift. And I also cleaned a lot of shit off toilet safes after every shift and i also cleaned a lot of shit off toilet seats oh yeah the people had shat on the toilet yeah because that was their protest

against the cost of the chocolate bars i was gonna say not realizing that the owner was not the person who would wash that shit down into the bowl yeah but the lowly worker it's not all ceo of cadbury coming in well I've learnt my lesson. Also, but like Notorious Suicide Spot, it used to be the Westgate Bridge, so you probably upsold some people their last ever Mars bars. Oh my god, I can't believe. That is grim.

Something that I've never considered. Thanks, Carl. Thank you so much. Sold someone the Barocca to give them back their BB-bass to hop over that hill. You saved someone's life. So wait, were there ever days where you were at one and then they're like, hey, the one over the other side, they're a bit short-staffed, so then you've got to walk across the bridge?

No, you can't walk across ten lanes. Because the cops coming and you're like, I promise I'm not jumping, I'm just going away. There's a secret road. Is there really? Yeah, you can go under the little bridge and there's a, I think it's Todd Road, and you basically zip around and you can go between them. And I did do that.

I'd take things between the stores when they were out of stock. Okay. And zip back and forth. Yeah, I love it. Because I've always wondered about them. The secret life of the Shell Servo. Well, okay, so you should be nicknamed Nugget. You're the one that brings Nuggets back and forth.

Because I've always wondered when you drive past on the big freeways and there'll be like a BP and an Oporto and then across the road there's like the identical setup. And I'm like, if you work there, are you working, are you like an east side and that's it? Or are you like, you get in your roster and it's like, hey, which side of the road am I on today? Yes, yes.

How's that marked on your roster? Yeah, no, I think it was south and north because it you like, you know, you get in your roster and it's like, hey, which side of the road am I on today? Yes, yes. How's that marked on your roster? Yeah, no, I think it was south and north because it was like, even though it was probably more west and east. I don't know. I've dated a geography teacher and I still have no idea. I still do the never eat soggy wheat bixby when I think about it. Me too. Which way to go.

So I'm the wrong person to think about direction. I have that too, except that's just for my life philosophy rather than direction. Yeah, it's a great life lesson, that's for sure. But, yeah, no, we were rostered different places and I always wanted to be rostered on the one out of town because, frankly, it paid well and eight hours went very fast because it was busy and it wasn't a great job.

It paid better than over the road? No, they both paid the same. But working at a servo, yeah, you want to, like, it could be a bit brutal. Like, it was lovely as well. Like, famous people used to come in. Who were some famous people? Jockeys.

Yeah, jockeys come in. Here you go. Hang on a minute. Hang on a minute. You've interviewed Paul McCartney. Jockeys used to come in. Now you're talking about selling banter to Darren Oliver. Come on.

And you couldn't even give a specific name. It was Damien Oliver. That's who used to come in. Now you're talking about selling banter to Darren Oliver. Come on. And you couldn't even give a specific name. It was Damien Oliver. Those used to come in. Those used to come in, yeah. But he used to sort of remember his name. He was famous. Tommy Woodcock, the trainer. Did he come in?

Tommy Woodcock. Tommy Woodcock didn't come in. And he comes in and he's like. Bar lap went through the drive-thru. Yeah, he comes in and he's like, I'm just paying for pump number like a, oh God, I can't remember the number. And you look out and there's just a horse. Oh, okay. Pump 11. That's the number and you look out and there's just a horse. Okay, pump 11.

That's the one. The one that feeds carrots instead of petrol. Whatever one that one is. We cater for everyone. It was a magical service station. That was good. Guy Pearce came in when he was filming Memento. Oh, okay.

Now, that would have been tough to remember what servo, what pump he was at. Yeah. He had it written on his arm. Was that filmed here? I think part of it was filmed in Australia. Yeah. Or at least it was around the time. I just remember it because he was at. Yeah. He had it written on his arm. Was that filmed here? I think part of it was filmed in Australia. Okay. Or at least it was around the time.

I just remember it because he was – His partner was in Geelong at the time and he used to do that drive to Geelong. He used to do it and he'd come in quite regularly and then he would – over the years he would always come in and you'd always be professional because I am a professional. I'd never acknowledge who he was, just be friendly. I interviewed him last year and I told him about that story and he thought it was hilarious.

What did he buy? A packet of Peter Stuyvesant? Yeah, he probably did. I think he just bought like just normal stuff. He was very normal but he was coming in during Memento and looking or just after gaunt and with this bleach blonde hair and I was like, what is he doing? And then of course a year later I saw the film come out.

We're obsessed with the Westgate and this is the biggest boon to the podcast since we got to ask Dr. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Since we got to ask Dr. Carr what it was like to work on it. My dad worked on it too. Oh, really? So it was in my blood to be close to the Westgate freeway. He was an engineer that worked on the Westgate too.

So do you think it's better to work at the- Hang on, was he an engineer that worked on the Westgate before it fell down or after? No, he wasn't involved in that. Okay, good, good. Is it better to work? That's why I went back there because I was like, I've got to make it right.

I've got to solve the mystery. This is my legacy. I owe you the Westgate. Is it better to work at the one as people are leaving because it's like people are probably like going somewhere maybe on like a weekend away so they're in a better mood, whereas if you're working on the other side, that's like people filling up before they come back.

No, people were in a bad mood both ways in, and I think also you don't factor into the fact that you've got so much traffic going out of town all the time, so it was always just like, yeah, intense, angry people. Angry people, it's never been mean. This is what years of working, and I don't know if you guys ever worked that much in retail, but I worked in hospitality and retail for a long time, and i am always polite to staff as a result of that

because it is very rarely if ever their fault never been mean to the people behind the counter they're just doing their jobs yeah that's my psa you must have had a lot of like at that servo i imagine like your peak times of people the en masse people coming back from like a Falls Festival, for example, where it's like – Bug-eyed. Yeah, you as the service station attendant are basically on suicide watch, like some people having the worst come downs of their life. Oh, my God, coming back from Meredith one of those weekends. The other thing too, do people just come to use the toilets

and not fill up? Because you know how Macca's was legendary for being basically a public toilet. Yeah. Servo same. For sure. I used to just get the mop bucket as well after one of those bouts and not even use the mop but just throw the bucket of soapy water all over

the toilet and just let it run down the walls because they'd just be piss all over the walls. My first job was a... But it paid $18.50 an hour. Which is a lot back in the day. My first job was at a BP When I was still at school And I was like Oh entering the workforce

How good is this And then it's like Thinking you'd be In the register And then like day one No you're cleaning the toilets That's all you're here doing What I always get

Is that thing It's quite a trek To get through the city To get to that point Where you see the bridge You go I'm free from Melbourne I'm on my way To the countryside

Or wherever I'm going And then it's like Oh no I better get a quarter pounder. You do all that and then you pull in. Well, mentally you're going to starve because you don't know what's coming your way. Back in the days when there was only one Maccas on the way to Geelong. You just weren't sure and that was a little bit off the freeway. Okay, because I once took my wife a long time ago. She's such a city girl and I've said this on the show before,

but she's such a city girl that I come from this on the show before but she's such a city girl that I come from a country town and we're going to talk about this soon. I took her to my hometown for the first time and we were going through Ballarat and I said we're going to stop in Ballarat to get dinner and she got really scared because she thought Ballarat was literally Sovereign Hill.

Boiled lollies. She thought I was going to pan for dinner. Which is great because for you, from where you came from, Ballarat is like Paris. Oh, absolutely. Oh, my God. Do you know that I did my Deb back in high school, right, in 1989, I think, and this is pre-internet,

so we had no idea what we were doing. I got my Deb dress made at Sovereign Hill. Oh, really? It's so beautiful. It's so bad. Where was – so what school? Redcliffe High School. So we went to Ballarat to Sovereign Hill and the ladies

who make the old-timey dresses made this white number for me. Big bouffant sleeves. Big bouffant sleeves. So they'll take commissions. You can just go in there. You go in and get yourself a dress made. That's great. So so you got like at your deb hope fingers crossed you got lucky you went around the back of the school and then some poor boy took 45 minutes to unbuckle you and then there was the chastity belt underneath yeah yeah yeah really panning for gold

so if you go in there... Found a nugget. If you go in there, are they... Has it got to be like time period appropriate? Like if you ask for something that's too modern, would they go, get the fuck out of here? I reckon they would actually. That's it. Yeah, they've only got standards. I really love that. Were you the only sepia-toned girl at the deck?

Yeah, exactly. The only ye olde lady. Yeah, that looked like I'd come off the boat from all the rivers run or something like that. It was just bizarre. What was I thinking? Sigrid Thornton, 17 again. We've got a photographer coming in, setting off the flashback. You've got to see this photo.

It got a second life in the last few years and it made its way onto a goon bag. It did. I had a range of wine cask and I thought, because, you know, remember the cooler bar I think it was? You used to have the lady in the white dress on the front. So I thought, because, you know, remember the cooler bar I think it was? Yes. Used to have the lady in the white dress on the front. Oh, yeah, right. So I thought I've got my own.

I called it the lonely lady because you always need a lonely lady in the fridge if you need a drink. And I thought I'm going to put my photo of me in my Deb dress on the front because it's perfect. Yeah, I love it. It's the only picture in the world of me in a white dress. So that was it. The dress is no longer with us? I don't know where the dress is. I think mum's the only picture in the world of me in a white dress. So that was it. The dress is no longer with us?

I don't know where the dress is. I think mum's got it somewhere in the cupboard. She's getting mothballs. I'll bring it out. I could put it on my arm. If I ever get the opportunity to have a photo of me on a can of beer, I'm going to use my formal photo. Oh, my God, yeah.

I was at my parents' house yesterday. They've got a photo of me from my formal framed is it in an oval frame it's in a square but it's like it's an edit that they did because i went with this girl that i was seeing briefly at the time and then we split up so they've chopped her out no they've just got me what makes the jacket and the cummerbund situation what colors me just a a suit from an op shop that didn't really fit properly. White bow tie. Oh, nice. And a beautiful head of hair.

It really looks like they just, that's the good times that they're trying to remember. Remember before our son was bald? I've got, you know, going back to, so my child, we call her Blanket on the show because I don't want to say her real name because then, I don't know, any bit of personal info that goes out on this show, I seem to get attacked about it. So we're hiding it. I've renamed her on the show after Michael Jackson's child. Yeah, that seems right. Her real name's the N-word, so he doesn't have to be coming after him.

Can't say anything these days. Can't name your kid anything anymore. We're getting 20 years. That'll date badly. Try to write it on the birth certificate. Here we go. The woke brigade have influenced everything, haven't they? So she has a little photo album from when she's,

a year ago, three years old. And it's in one of those like oval framed books. And last night, for some reason, she had hold of it. She somehow climbed a cupboard and got hold of it. And I said,

what are you doing with that? And she goes, I'm just looking at it. Don't worry, daddy. I'm never going to throw this in the bin. i was like that's weird wording okay all right and she's just looking at it and then i came back an hour later and she got all the pictures and put them in the bin what wow and then and but then replaced the pictures yeah with christmas cards

okay what the fuck is going on there she's getting ready to like fake her own death trying to erase all evidence that she ever existed but i love that she that's the she's just learning how to trick at the moment that's her she's discovered lying so her way of lying is just to out now like for her to go don't worry i'm never gonna put this in the bin i was like i didn't think you were going to but then like one as soon as i turned around straight in the bin and you fell for it yeah you're like well i'll take this four-year-old at her word i love it she knows what's going on so this is a so you gave her a book of photos of her i did not give it to the age of three i did not give her anything we i hid everything away

and then my wife put it out and put it on a lower level. Oh, so this is a photo album that you have sitting around the house of photos. Yes, of her. Right. Just of her. My dad gave me this weird present like a year ago. He just gave me a photo album of just all photos of me that he's put together. Oh, that's beautiful.

And I was like, this is nice, but I'm like, I don't really have the need for a book of photos of me in my house. Just reflect on yourself. Yeah. Yeah. And he's like made this cover for it. It says, Tommy Dasolo, my life, dot, dot, dot, so far. Yeah. I'm like, oh, I'm glad I'm not dead yet.

What are you supposed to do? Have your dad ring up and go, don't worry, Tommy, I burnt all the evidence of you existing. Well, I mean, it's like, you're the you're the parent, aren't you meant to have the photos of me to look back on? I'm not really sitting here being like, oh, there I am doing comedy. Yeah. You know what, though?

I reckon they're just clearing it out. My mum did the same thing. She's like, I'm sick of carrying all your toys, all your stuff around, the stuff that they'd hoarded from our childhood. Even though that's their role. Even though that's. The store all that shit. Yeah.

And they paid for it, so it's theirs. It's true. But she just gave me a box of all the photos and all the toys and was like, oh, okay. Yeah. I have to throw it out. Yeah. We're done with you.

Don't you love me anymore? That's what I'm in the process of doing as well because my parents are moving house, the childhood house, and they've basically gone and come back and get everything out of here. It's confronting, isn't it? Yeah. And also I don't want to store any of that shit. Exactly.

Yeah, exactly. I did one trip and I came back with one bag full of things and I'm like pretty much you can burn the rest if you want. What was in that one bag? Yeah. There was a book that I read 20 times when I was a kid. Choose Your Own Adventure? No, no, no.

No, it was just a- The game? No. I can see why this guy has a kid. It worked. No, no. I did bring back a soft core porn magazine. An early man.

It still works. But it was more so that my mum wouldn't find out when she went through everything. This is taking up so much room. But the worst thing was I brought it back. I go, I better get rid of this on the way home. Then I forgot. Then I left it in my bag. Then my wife went, what's this here?

What's this here? And then in my defense, I was like, to be fair, have a look at it. It is 25 years old. That's not something I've held on to for 25 years. What was it called? The mag, do you remember? Yeah, it was a picture magazine. Oh, picture.

Yeah. R.I.P. Yeah, that's gone. Sold a few of those at the survey. Oh, I bet. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I bet. Absolutely. I used to work at the newsagents in Redcliffs and yeah, we sold lots of...

Black plastic cover. Yeah, top shelf. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. That was always my thing. They had the hardcore ones, didn't they? The triple X and stuff and the picture magazines weren't covered, but the other ones as you went further and further up were... Yeah. Yeah, yeah. That was always my thing. They had the hardcore ones, didn't they? The XXX and stuff. And the picture magazines weren't covered, but the other ones as you went further and further up were.

Exactly. As a teenage boy in a small town news agency, they're the ones you had access to. They were put down on a table. You could look at them. You could have a sneak through. Like, oh, sorry, I thought it was a trading post. Sorry.

Oh, right. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I thought some guy was trying to sell a pair of big natties. It's a bit harder ripping open plastic and going, sorry, thought it was Gardening Australia. Sorry about that. A magazine in plastic, just so enticing.

What's going on back there? That's my go-to bit on a road trip is to stop off to get petrol and snacks. A hardcore porn. Just buy a porno and then just get back into the car and chuck it in the back seat and go, there you go guys, got this for a bit of a read for the drive. Oh wow. I hadn't even thought about that.

Like do people still buy porn in magazine form? I don't think so. Is anyone leaving it up the bush anymore for younger kids to find? That's what we want to know. Is it? In the trees or like, you know, out on a spare block or something. That's the way we all learn about the birds and the bees. In cubby houses.

Yeah, I saw my first picture of a blowjob in the back of the bus on a school trip. Yes. What's someone going up to the bush and just discovering a little folded up piece of paper that just says redtube.com on it? Is that how it's happening? What's the equivalent? It should. Is porn like music where it's like, who's buying CDs anymore?

Oh, you know, 60-year-olds. Are 60-year-olds buying porn? Still doing it. They're like, I only do analogue. Yeah. Probably. No digital for me. Yeah.

Yeah, I don't download. I just... I'm a purist. I'm going to go and look into newsagents and see if they still have some porn. I won't buy, but I'm intrigued. Around the corner here, there is a beautiful newsagent. It's got to be one of the last fully functioning ones in the city. It's huge.

It has magazines that you didn't even know existed. And then it's just got a whole bit where they just sell crap that they've just found. I love those newsagents. Off the back of a truck. It's all the stuff that didn't sell at the post office. Computer speakers. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Like Spider-Man costumes. One time I went there and there was they're not licensed like they're not a bottle shop but there was just like one can of johnny walker in the fridge and i was like is this is this just someone who works here is just keeping this when they knock off or are they just like are they just like testing it out yeah i was like should I just take this to the counter and see if I can buy this one alcoholic drink that they've randomly decided to sell? Maybe they came free with like a copy of FHM 10 years ago.

Yeah. And it's been there ever since. And they've only just found it out the back. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, treat yourself to a perusal of the beautiful big news agency near my house. Well, can I say this? So the small town that I'm from might ring a bell with you, Mick,

that I'm talking about. I am from, I grew up in and lived in from zero till 17, the little town of Maryborough in Victoria. Yeah. Which you are the head of a new show coming out on SBS. Yeah, it's called Meet the Neighbours and Maryborough's got some struggles at the moment, which is that the population...

At the moment? What, the last 2,000 years or so? Well, like all country towns, I think there's a real struggle at the moment because they're ageing. Well, the softcore pornography's all been taken out. Will to live gone. So they're in sort of predicaments Yeah. Well, the softball pornography has all been taken out. Yeah. Little to live gone.

So they're in sort of predicaments and not enough jobs, not enough housing. And I think what's going on in Maryborough is not dissimilar to lots of other towns. So Maryborough has said the council and the local community welcomed this project, which is basically it's an idea whereby we get lots of families from diverse backgrounds to move to maryborough for three months and they did it they did it and it must have been full-on for the families the local community really got behind it like they found

the macomb which normally doesn't happen because it's so difficult to get housing in small country towns and um and yeah it was it was really interesting i loved maryborough did you yeah big wide streets beautiful old buildings but you know like i grew up in a country town so so i kind of get it and i get it as well because the thing is i've talked about maryborough on this show for 12 years and it's all been from the mind frame of like a kid growing up and going this sucks everything's shit house here and then we did a live episode there once, and everyone's like, great, this is going to be like the Wild West, and we're going to get stabbed on the way in.

And then everyone went, this is quite nice. And I was like, ah, shit. We drove up. A bunch of us were in the car, and you were like, I'll take you guys for a drive down the main street. And then halfway through, we're all like, this is great. That bakery looks beautiful. Can we get out?

They've got really good sausage rolls. Really good sausage rolls and pies, like award winning. I mean, every town has awards. Every town has awards. Award winning pies and sausage rolls. The best vanilla slice. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, I judged the vanilla slice competition one year in Oyen in Victoria.

That was when I first sort of became known. I was working on Spicks and Specks and they're like, come home, Miff, judge the vanilla slice competition. Can I please ask you, you had a great sausage roll and a great pie. Can I ask you, do you remember where you got it from? It wasn't on the main street. Damn it! Because one of my good mates owns the bakery on the main street,

so could we please change that? You were saying off air that you did get one from the main street. I did get one. No. No, not at all. Not at all. No, I mean, I didn't try one from the main street. Right, right, right. So it may have been better. It may have been even better. It may have been better. Right. I did get one. No. No, not at all. I mean, I didn't try one from the mainstream. So it may have been better.

It may have been even better. It may have been better. I don't know. You had the best one there out of a sample size of one. Correct. But that's only because you didn't have any more. Correct. That is correct.

Because we did go. Because the thing is, our after party, when we did a live show in Mirabar, our after party, we brought dozens of strangers to my friend's bakery who then opened it up out the back, started cooking pies at 1am, opened up, they had like a kid's, what do you call it? They had a big playroom with a ball pit and a slide. It was one of the best after party ever. It was so good. It was the best night of my life.

I was like, this is all great. And then all of a sudden we realised someone was getting oral sex in the playground and we're like, okay, I don't know, maybe we need a deep clean of this before the two-year-old's getting there tomorrow morning. I think I've just been thinking, like, what a beautiful, fun, wholesome experience it's had with your mates. Be in a playground and pretend to be a kid again. Oh, no.

Oh, no. That's why we read the porn magazine on how to get a gobby on the bus. I love that you just said gobby. I haven't heard that word since 1989 either. Yeah, gobby's very small country town. Yeah. That's the lingo. Now, the thing that I've always been obsessed with,

with Mirabar in particular, and, Zan, you're from a small country town as well, aren't you? Yeah, Essendon. Essendon. Small country town. Back in my day, it was way out of town. Now it's considered inner city. Yeah, right.

Did you have, you know, my love on this show is for the more eccentric folk of the town. Did you have a bunch of them? Oh, yeah. There was, I mean, we got them all at the newsagents. Yes, of course. You know why? You know why? Well, they've got to get their papers and they've got to get their woman's day and they've

got to get their, you know, whatever, their picture magazine. That's secondary. Smokes? No, that's all secondary. That's all secondary. You know what they need. Why? Because I grew up in shops.

My mum and dad were shopkeepers the whole way through. Oh, my God. Give me their theory. Because you have to talk to them. They're potential customers. They can come in and swan around and do 50 laps and you're the only people that will talk to them. Because if they try and talk to someone outside,

it's like, ooh, we're scared of you. If you go in there and pretend you're going to pick up a copy of The Herald Sun for half an hour, it's like, and what else happened today, Mavis? Yeah, okay, rightio. What shops did your parents have? They had, look, the newsagent was the dream. My childhood was me obsessed with saying,

can you please take over the newsagents? It was like, no, that was a massively profitable business that they could not get off the... Couldn't buy in. No, couldn't buy in. It was back in the day, these days, easy. Back then, biggest business in town. So many magazines, whatever.

It's like you can't just buy a Starbucks franchise. They need to see that you've run a few other successful businesses the Maryborough News agent's the same thing bring the portfolio in

but not only that my argument was because then I get to read all the magazines and my mum and dad are like probably not

a good enough reason for our investment into that business I get to open all the magazines on the top shelf no no I get to see the mad magazines before anyone else.

No, that's totally it. Do the fold out. As old Mrs. Richie used to say to us, because I used to live in the newsagents after school, she used to say to us... Were you that person in the town that you just went in there for a chat? No. No.

Alfred E. Newman's done it again, hasn't he? No, I would literally come in every day to see which new comics and whatever had come in. I'd go through a bit. Because I was in there so much, Mrs. Ritchie used to come in to me and all my friends and go, just remember, boys, magazines aren't for reading. I'm like, fuck. Okay, we've been doing this wrong. They're for buying?

Is that what she meant? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, okay. So no, my parents had a deli, which was a deli slash cafe. doing this wrong. Care for buying? Is that what she means? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, okay. All right. So no, my parents had a deli, which was a deli slash cafe. Yeah. They had a shoe shop, but it was a daggy shoe shop. The barter shoes and the foot measurer. And the Grosby's.

Grosby Gros shoe. We love that. Fucking foot measurer. I hated being put on that thing. My torture device. I just hated it. I'm like, mum and dad, would I kill you to get some Nikes in this joint? But no.

No, just a black standard school shoe for you. Yes, absolutely. Hush puppies or nothing. Absolutely. Windsor Smith.

Clark shoes. Windsor Smith for a Friday night on the town with the boys. I don't think it was quite that time. With the square shoe,

the square top. Oh yeah. That's a dress shoe. The file off, the sawn off shoe. A lot of tassels and things on, like golf sort of shoes and stuff.

Oh, yeah, like a loafer. Yeah, yeah, yeah, a lot of loafers. Clarks are probably too. Clarks are back around, I reckon. Clarks are cool now. Shoe shop then. I'm jealous of the shoe shop. I love the boxes.

It's like Christmas. It looked out in the back room. It looked like it was Merry Christmas for everybody. Mysteries. I did spend a school holiday once going through all of the shoe shop, all the shoes, shoe boxes,

because there were, there was once some sort of deal where they had like little toys in the shoe boxes. So I went through the entire inventory

finding the toys. So no one in Mirabar got a free toy. So someone lost out on a toy and you got them all. Everyone lost out on them. I got a big collection.

I always wondered about that. Any promotion or competition where it'd be like we've hidden a thing in one thing I'd always just be like if you run the shop why aren't you just

going through the bags to find the thing I'm the answer you do do it you do that's why the average person will never win you're a nepo baby

I think you're a small country town You know who they were? I wish I'd kept them They were little glass Snoopies Oh I remember them Do you? Yeah Oh my god I've just been I've had the real memory then

I had one I should go back to mum There's probably a whole fucking cupboard full of them Yeah there would have been Yeah And you collected them all obviously Yeah I think I just got like 15 of the same ones or something. Because I had no one to swap with because I had all of them in town.

The shoe shop, then we went back to another cafe, then opened a new cafe, then a health food shop, which sucked. You felt terrible? Yes. Why? There was nothing nothing I was maybe 13, 14 no interest

in anything in the shop no interest I went from like at least you know there was Snoopy toys in the shoe shop

in the cafes there was lollies there was hot chips there was all this sort of stuff now I'm like I remember distinctly remember

the only thing in the whole shop I enjoyed in any way is they had some sort of diet creaming soda. And I was like, okay, I guess I'll have one of them every day, I guess. Did it have summer rolls? Do you remember summer rolls that we used to get at school?

Nothing as fun as that. They were considered the health food of the chocolate bar, weren't they? Yes. You always convinced yourself and your parents that they were healthy, and they're not. No, not at all. I've been hitting the summer roll a lot lately. And the little sesame bar thing.

Sesame bar was great. The same company. And the nougat honey nougat. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All them. Whatever that weird company is that just makes those three. Europe. Yes.

Europe. How did they get into schools? How did they get a mainline to public schools and all sorts of schools? Because they had different kinds of fruit on them, I guess. Yeah. Those are all like cornerstones of actual ingredients. Yeah. Just the sheer amount of sugar. You can just claim. Yeah. Those are all like cornerstones of actual ingredients. Yeah. But you can just claim that you're healthy and no one's going to verify it.

Oh, that was the 80s and 90s. You can do whatever you want it. Yeah, yeah. Oh, it's got a bit of coconut on it. Oh, yeah. Cool. Healthy. My go-to canteen meal was a 40-cent white roll with mayonnaise and iceberg lettuce inside.

Oh. Just mayo and lettuce. Yep. Gourmet. Really? Delicious. Yeah. It was like a fillet of fish.

Yeah. Or is it fillet of fish but without the actual protein? Yeah. But were you asking for the protein to be taken out or is that how it was sold? No, it became a trend because it was 40 cents and it became a real thing. It's like we're going to get a roll, white roll with lettuce and mayonnaise. It was probably a real like teenage girl, this is healthy for us vibe. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Nest up, body just mopping and stuff. Like the worst thing you can eat. Yeah, I'm just eating lettuce. This is a good idea. Just lettuce. It's just less food. It's like those diets and things that we used to get in Clio magazine. Mayonnaise, pepper and lemon diet.

Yeah, and white wine diet. There was one that went around in the 80s, I think, and it was just literally a glass of wine in the morning and then nothing. Some cabbage at the lunch and then a glass of wine in the afternoon and then I think you have a whole bottle a day and just some cabbage and you must have been absolutely

off your head and reeking. Drunk and farting all day. Passed out by seven, no need for dinner. Reset, start the whole thing again. I mean you look great but no one wants to be around you. We're also like nostalgia-pilled at the moment. I'm amazed that no one's opened up like an adult tuck shop. Oh, yeah.

Like a canteen where you go in, crotchety old woman working there, just all the same old snacks. Did you ever have – did you get to that point where you got to choose – you know, you're in grade six and then you choose which secondary school you go to and you – how do you make that call six and then you choose which secondary school you go to. And how do you make that call? We didn't get a choice. You didn't get a choice?

You just had the one option? There was the one option in our town. I mean, we could have gone to Mildura maybe, but Redcliffe, no one did. I distinctly remember we had, because we had three choices. We had the Christian Community College, which, of course, we were not going to go to. Yuck, boring. Or we had the high and the tech.

Now, the tech. You got to do woodwork and shit at the tech. Yeah, yeah. But I wasn't into that. I was more like, you know, I'm more bookish. Yeah. But the thing that was a big thing for a lot of us was at the tech, really good canteen.

So there's a lot of people going. Imagine, though, when you come out of school and you're like, I can't believe I spent six years of my schooling for the tuck shop. Yeah, yeah. I threw away my education for a good pie. Absolutely. I'm like. I'm done my way, 150 kilos. I wanted to become an author and now I'm a plumber.

Good chips. I'll never get to have chips again. I just went to the high school that my dad went to. He was like, I went here, so you're going here. And then I left at the end of year 10, and I was like, in not the best circumstances, I kind of got asked to leave. What happened? It's kind of a boring story.

Too long, too long. But dad was like, yeah, I'm not surprised that happened. I fucking hated it there. Like, why did you send me there then? He sent me in with a loaded gun. Oh, my God. Yeah. So then the last shop, so that's four shops, I think.

Then the last shop, they ended on the worst one, my parents. They owned a reject shop, like a reject shop, not like the actual, you know, the reject shop. Off-brand reject shop. Off-brand reject shop. A $2 shop kind of thing. A reject shop. Yeah, yeah, yeah reject shop. Off-brand reject shop. Off-brand reject shop. Like a $2 shop kind of thing. Reject, reject shop. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

All the stuff that the reject shop turned into. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The fish John West rejects. Yes. The rejects that John West rejects. Oh, my God. Is that the one in the old cinema or something? There's a beautiful old building there because there's still a $2 shop there.

Of course there is. As far as I went in, it was in a beautiful old building. Yes. But not that. And it had skylights in it. No, no. Heritage listed landfill store. It was amazing.

Heritage listed whoopee cushion. I hate when a $2 shop is just called $2 shop. Like I like, you know, there's one near here called like Hot Potatoes. There's like Uncle Buck's in Prahran. It's like have a bit of fun with the name. Have fun with it. It's clear from the outside what is going on in there. Yeah, but that's great because the name of our shop,

because it wasn't like we'd taken over it, we started the shop. And imagine this being I was 15 or 16 in high school, perfect bullying era. The name of the shop was Chandler's Rejects. The worst. Oh, God. The worst. Oh, God. The worst. Oh, no. Every day having to walk into school and pop that one.

Yeah, Jesus Christ. And are you seeing the sign go up and like, Mom, Dad, I'm begging you, I'll do anything. I've got some ideas. The dog shit shop. Yeah. The worst fucking shop in town. What about any of this sort of stuff?

Chandler's sexy shop. Yeah, yeah, yeah. How about Jones's Rejects? Yeah. Someone else's Rejects. Oh, man. Kids are brutal in country towns too. They can be really brutal.

I'm sure they're brutal everywhere, but yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. In a small town as well. It's like, yeah, no good. I wonder if there's any people from Miff's TV show pulling up a shift at Chandler's Rejects. No, it's not there anymore oh okay because the the nice thing was that they had the the we had a shop called chandler's deli and that stayed there for like 30 years or something and they never changed the name of it

it was sort of nice to go oh the the brand so the brand's still you know yeah you know whatever and then because i was going to say that's interesting that they then, I'm glad there is another dalliance with retail at the end there because as it stands before that, it's just bizarre that they go from food to just randomly shoes in the middle of that. Yeah. And then back to food. So they clearly just loved running businesses.

Absolutely. Building them, selling businesses, moving on to the next thing. Knew how to run a business. Yes. I love that. I was a shop kid. That was just me all like from, you know, four until 18, every day after school, down the shops.

I was just doing laps of every shop. I knew every shop and what was in every shop. It was like nothing else to do. Slingshot in the back pocket. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, the Dennis, the menace of retail. You've got to say.

Panning for gold in his pencil room. Yeah. Dennis the Menace of Retail. You've got to say. Panning for gold in his pencil room. Yeah. Dennis the Reject. So we talked. No, I thought, you know, given that you have spent time in Maribor now, what I thought I might check with you about this thing. Now, I still hang out with a bunch of my friends from Maribor. And once we moved away, we're all still obsessed with Maribor.

This is my last link leaving now, basically. All my friends have moved out. A lot of their parents have moved out. My parents are moving out. Now, we compiled this big list of all the absolute weirdos of Maribor that we grew up with or knew of or whatever it was. And it passed around about 10 of us. There was a committee that would decide on who went on the list.

Oh, my God, I love this. We had this list. So I just thought I'd check in to see if you ran into any of these people. I feel like that might have run into me if I was doing anything on the street. They'd come up and talk to me. Absolutely. Yeah, probably. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Now, you might not know their names because none of these are their actual names. They're just the nicknames that we had for all of them. So did you run into Leopard Head? Do you remember seeing a man with a head like a leopard? Do you remember that? No, it doesn't ring a bell. Are we going to find out how Martin Scorsese with his Killers of the Flower Moon, he got as many Osage County people as he could to work on the film?

We're going to find out, yeah, Leopard Head was an EP on this show. This is authentic. Scouted for locations, yeah. I'll go through. I'm just trying to find the people. Tell me more about Leopard Head. Literally, you can work it out. He looked like a leopard.

One time a guy walked along and someone pointed at him and went, oh my God, that man has the head of a leopard. And everyone went, you know that thing where everyone just goes, you've nailed that. That guy's head looks like a leopard's head. Did he have anything going on there, like skin things? A few spots. Just a few spots.

Maybe he's like the panther. Could be like the combination of, you know, in the country there's always rumours of, you know. Are you suggesting someone had sex with a wild cat? Possibly. Or maybe they just saw his leopard heads. No, but Maribor, of course, like a lot of country towns, has always had that legendary thing.

Did you have it where you grew up, where there was always the myth of like a panther? The panther that came in World War II. Did you have it? We didn't have it, no, but that myth is everywhere. That's a big country myth, isn't it? We had it. The editor of the Maribor Advertiser, our local editor, was obsessed with it.

We did two papers a week, a Tuesday and a Friday, and you were guaranteed one of them led with it on the front page. Sighting. Led with it on the front page. Love it, love it. He was obsessed with it. With like infrared photos and stuff. Yeah, he'd have like a recording and go, listen to that, Panther.

It's like, that's a fucking cockatoo. I'd love to just import a capybara or something and just let it loose. Any time you read, you'd be like, yeah, I know for a fact that's real because I made it happen. That was the whole thing that somehow

in World War II, the army had brought over a panther for some reason. As a mascot for the American... You mean as a weapon? It was panther for some reason. As a mascot for the American. Right, right. I thought you meant as a weapon. No. It was as a mascot. Why they would do that for the American army so they could feel, I don't know, I don't know what you'd feel by having a panther.

But if that's in World War II or whatever, they had to have brought over two of them. A couple because they'd have to breed. Yeah. So I just think, well, they're probably bred with a couple of feral cats locally and you've got a few hybrids. That's how Leopard Head was born. That's how Leopard Head was born.

Maybe he was brought up, he suckled at the teeth. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The general got a bit lonely in the bush. What else was there? Here we go. What else was there? There was, here we go. There was a, now look, there was an Asian family, which was very rare in the 80s in Maribor.

And there was a guy, there's a kid called Rodney that went to our school. And he was telling us, he was telling people that they came from a, like a fishing family over in Asia somewhere. And if so, of course, you've figured out what his name is now by now, haven't you? Can you put that together? I'm not saying it. No? No?

Fishing Rod. Yep. I was just going to say Fish Man. No, no, no. I'm actually impressed. I'm actually impressed. Fishing Rod's great. That's quite clever.

That's good for Maribor. Exactly. That's good for Maribor. Yeah. As opposed to this one, Hanky Panky, who he's the man that was caught in the high school toilets masturbating into his own handkerchief. Oh, that's disgusting.

No word as to whether anyone said gesundheit or God bless you afterwards. Student or teacher? Student. Okay, just checking. Mature age student as well. I don't. I like the fact that with the inflection you said his own hanky implies that that's the bit that you find most objectionable.

He's someone else's. Don't use your own. Use a tissue. That's disposable. Don't wank into your hanky and then put it back in your pocket. Just having a hanky is gross. Even that's like. Disgusting.

Also, he's not in prison. Like he's just still walking around the town and he's the guy who jerks off in the toilet. He's got choices. Getting home from school and putting your cum-soaked hanky into the washing machine. Hey, Mum. Clean this up. Got to freshen it up for tomorrow. But I also think that that's quite a quaint nickname for someone who's jerked off in the

boys' toilet. Yeah, it's cute. Yeah. Panky, panky. He really, he got off pretty lightly there. Yeah, I think so. Well, you'd have to look into the h' toilet. Yeah, it's cute. Yeah. Panky Panky. He really, he got off pretty lightly there. Yeah, I think so. Well, you'd have to look into the hand.

There was a guy, now there's a guy that we were obsessed with because this is just such a beautiful name where this, our friend, it convinced us

was so heavy on the assertion that this guy's name, he lived next door to this guy called Barry Monopoly. And we're like, that's such a great name. This is so good. And we're like, this can't be his name. That's too good of a name. How do you have a name Barry Monopoly?

And so we went with it because you want to believe it. But then one day we were going through the phone book and we're like, oh, well, let's look up this guy, look up his number to ring him up or whatever. And then our friend's like, oh, let me see that for a minute. And then he like changed it. We're like, what are you doing? He was writing in it. And we opened it up and we looked up Monopoly and it's there.

But he'd scrubbed out John and written Barry. And we're like, that's not the funny bit. Monopoly's the funny bit. Why did you think you're getting it over the line by changing it to Barry? Yeah, John Monopoly. That's funny enough. Still good. Barry is better.

Barry's better. I'm with him. Barry's better. Him seeing John Monopoly and being like, what a shame. There's no story here. And he's also done it himself. You're not allowed to do that. You have to have that title given to you by someone else, don't you,

if you change? Yes. The rule of nicknames. You give your own nickname. I'm thinking he can fool you with a handwritten piece of phone. How dumb does he think his friends are? Well, yeah, there was plenty of us. So at this stage, you haven't run into any of these people?

No, no, no. Barry Monopoly didn't show. You didn't see Barry Monopoly? Okay. Panky Panky, thankfully, didn't. Yeah. Barry Monopoly definitely works in real estate though. Oh, yeah.

Oh, my God. That sounds really good, doesn't it? Barry Monopoly. Barry Monopoly. Let's make a deal. Yeah. That is good. There was a guy that – now, there's all that thought put into some nicknames and then

there's some, I I think simpler the better. This is such a simple nickname that I actually love it. This guy was a guy who had like dark lank sort of hair that went down to probably his belly button. He would walk around, one of those guys that would walk around with his arms by his sides, wouldn't move his arms when he walked, just all black. around with his arms by his sides, wouldn't move his arms when he walked, just all black, furrowed brow, would just walk around in black clothes all day and just not make eye contact with anyone. His name, Drugs. Not even a specific one.

Just Drugs. There goes Drugs. Just that genre. Well, you wear yourself out with hanky-panky. You don't have the mental capacity for anything. We took three months to come up with fishing rods. Drugs. Yeah, no drugs.

Didn't see drugs. That's 35 years later. He might have. Yeah. The hair would have been grey or something. I don't know. Yeah. What else we got?

What about you, Zan? None of these people have emigrated over to Essendon. I'm sure all of them have. They're all kind of timeless and placeless. They exist everywhere all at once. They exist in time and space. Yeah. There was a guy called Arthur because he, for some reason,

his family built a house, but then ran out of money. And so there was only, they only completed 50% of it. And so they lived in that. So it was Arthur, Arthur House. Now that's good. See, again, if you'd worked a little harder on drugs, you wouldn't be able to come up with that.

So thank God. Pull the resources. But I never figured out, like, we always would say, because it was actually like, it wasn't like, oh, they only half finished the house. It was like they didn't finish the interior. It was like literally one half of it was just complete right angles. Like it was literally exactly half of one house.

So they like sealed, they've like finished it. They've like put a wall on it. Yeah. And just went. Because they couldn't leave it open. Yeah. They didn't go to sleep or anything. That'll do for now. So they've like finished it. They've like put a wall on it. Yeah. And just went. Because they couldn't leave it open. Yeah. They didn't go to sleep or anything. That'll do for now.

Yeah, they sealed it up. I don't know whether the other half fell off the truck on the way there. We'll just put one of our kids up for adoption. Or maybe half of it got repossessed. Maybe they only made the payments on half of the house. And you reminded them of that every day

when you called them Harper. Yes, again. I love it when you see. Hey, hey, again. I love it when you see... Hey, hey, look, I had to cop Chandler's rejects. I love it when you see a house on the back of a truck.

It's incredible, isn't it? Like someone just transplanting the whole truck. It's like... The whole house. It's like just a thing that you... I feel like you just don't hear

about it happening anymore. It's like... My parents have said they're going to do it. Just move the whole thing. Yeah, because they're massive. Like they hate wasting anything. They hate like throwing anything out. So they're going to do it just move the whole thing yeah because they're massive like they hate wasting anything they hate like throwing anything out so they're like when we move on from our house because it was made however many years ago and it's actually really good wood that doesn't

exist anymore like we don't want this just to go in the trash we don't want to be burned so we're going to cut it and move it out to the country and just like someone else can buy it but we don't want it to be wasted so they don't want it anymore they just want someone else i just don't want it to go to waste because someone will just presume is this in essence yeah so presumably someone's gonna buy it and they think just turn someone's gonna someone's gonna every other block on our street in my childhood which i still live in is like four apartments now this is this is like the op shopping of real estate this is like i don't want anymore but it's too good to chuck out. Yeah, that's my parents. Right.

It's kind of beautiful. It is beautiful. I just worry that, and I hate saying this, but I don't want them to die and then have that in their will so I have to take care of that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't want to have to be the person who puts their house on the back of a truck.

Mum, can you donate our house to science? That happened to my home I grew up in. My dad's an architect and sort of like did it up over the whole time we lived there and you know made it beautiful and then they moved out and just immediately got leveled and turned into like the ugliest block of flats you've ever seen it's the worst an actual architect devoted his life to making this house look good they should have i should have lobbied for them to do that. Put it on the back of a truck. That's heartbreaking.

Take it into the country. Yeah. I've got, maybe I'll do one or two more of these just to make sure, just to get one of these, one glimmer of recognition in your eyes, Miff. Now, there was a guy, his nickname was Bluey. This is one of my favorite things generally in society is when you get a personalized number plate wrong. You couldn't get exactly what you wanted,

so you get a three for an E. You've got seven letters to play with. Yeah, you've got seven letters to play with. So you can't fit, you know, there was, again in Mirabar, there was someone who loved Nirvana who got Nivana. Not quite there. Well played. So this guy, this guy's name is Blue. Okay. Not quite there. Well played. So this guy's name is Bluey because he had red hair.

Easy one. He, of course, in the country town, so many boys and girls obsessed with their utes. Yes. Driving around with a ute, despite not needing it for that reason. So he got his own ute, wanted to make sure he Had that written down on his ute Blew his ute Of course with seven letters What did he end up with?

Blusset What? So that was his nickname Blusset He doesn't even make sense Rhymes with gusset B-L-U-S Blues

Blues And then run out of Room for ute So just U-T. U-T. U-T. Oh, my God. Blues Utes.

B-L-U-S-U-T. That sounds like the sort of item of clothing they'd sell in that Sovereign Hill. Absolutely. Go and get yourself a blusset. A blusset. For your modesty. For your modesty. Over the chassis belt, under the skirt, the blusset.

Yeah. God, where I was growing up, when I grew up, there was no such thing as personalised number plates, I don't think. I think it was a bit – I must be a lot older than you. No, not too much. Maybe we weren't that sophisticated. Personalised plates, the height of sophistication. It still is, Anne.

What are you talking about? Missed that once as well. A bit fancy. It's very fancy. It says you've got? Missed that once as well. A bit fancy. It's funny that someday. It's very fancy. It says you've got extra money. Yeah. You've got money to burn.

You can afford to do something that, you know, most people can barely afford to pay their rego, you know. Yeah, and when it's like coloured as well. And you're like, you've just got like cash to burn and you'd think they were very fancy in a small country town. And there's so many youths, it's hard to mix them up. Hard to tell. You need to know. You need to know which one's yours. They need town. And there's so many youths, it's hard to mix them up. Hard to tell. You need to know.

You need to know which one's yours, especially Blossom. Bluey's it. It's great thinking about the day where someone in the VicRoads office has come in and gone, guys, what if we just let people do whatever the fuck they want? We'd make a little extra money here. The fact that that didn't always exist, that it was like, can people be trusted? Are they just going gonna put swear words on their car yeah if we let and the answer is yes

yeah you gotta be you gotta be smart about it though yeah i'll just do one more um we had there was a guy again because this is pre-internet and and you can't look things up and you can't um know exactly what's going on in the town it's's all about, you know, gossip and whispers and whatever. Someone, you know that thing where one person will just decide something and then say something about something and then that sticks and that goes around because the best thing about a lie, the trick to a lie is to tell someone what they want to hear. So there was a guy called Tim who started up like,

because this is like early mid-90 early mid 90s. So of course, heaps of grunge bands and stuff like that. So this guy would do like a grunge band. His name was Tim and they didn't know what the name of the band was. So someone put around the rumor

that his name, his band's name was Timmy and the Tams. So that's all anyone ever said. How's your band, Timmy and the Tams going? You know, like Tim Tams.

He's like, fuck you. I want to be the next Alice in Change, you fuck. Yeah, that's good though. That's a good band name. Timmy and the Tams. Because he's probably doing his metal voice. He's been practising it all day.

And everybody's just hanging shit on him. If you launched a band now called Timmy and the Tams and put them on like Triple J Unearthed, now is like the right time for that name. Perfect time. Amal and the Sniffers, Teen Jesus and the G-Teasers, all that kind of stuff. Hey, this is the time of Nirvana.

This is not now. This is not now. You should just do a music festival where it's all you doing different bands for all of these names. Leopardhead. Leopardhead's a good name for a band. Leopardhead's good. I'd go on Tinder. where it's all you doing different bands for all of these names. Leopardhead. Leopardhead's a good name for a band. Leopardhead's good.

I'd go on Fida. Actually, you know what? Fishing Rod. Yeah. Fishing Rod's a good band, though. I'll supply all these names. If someone can make one of those music posters like Big Day outside where they have the hierarchy. The Coachella line-up.

Yeah, the eye chart sort of thing where you've got Blusset up the top closing at the festival and then Fishing Ride, Nirvana, Blusset. Yeah, half a house was meant to be closing on the Sunday, and then half an hour later I decided it didn't feel like it, and they had to cancel. The set got cut in half because of rain. I feel like half of it would be the hip-hop artist as well. Yeah, yeah, totally, totally.

Headlining Maryborough, New Year's Eve, 2023. Yeah. So you actually spent time in there? A. New Year's Eve, 2023. Yeah. Yeah. So you actually spent time in there? A little bit of time there, yeah. A couple of weeks on and off. I'd drive there and then sort of hang with the participants mostly and then hung out at the bowling club a lot.

Oh, yes. Because we did a big drone shot on the bowling club and then took out the whole town. At the Highland Society? Yeah, at the Highland Society. As we call it, the Violent Society. So that is where we did our live show. At a parma there?

That's where we did our live show. Is that where you did your live show? Yeah, it is. And Dave O'Neill, for some reason, we'd been talking about this on the show in the lead up and he came and did the show and brought his bass guitar and ripped out a bit of bass for us. I can't remember what the set up for that was.

Did anyone ask him or he just offered? We just thought it would be funny to have Dave. We were like, you should bring your bass and just do a – Oh, my God. Do some hot licks from Captain Coco. Exactly. Yes. Yes.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, it was funny because it was a very small town because, you know, all the listeners of this show all got obsessed and went, well, we've all got to come up to Maryborough. So there's people flying in to go to Maryborough. I love that. The place is chock-a-block. But then, of course, because being a small town, they were like,

oh, he's one of the Chandlers. Oh, we'll come and just support or sticky nose or whatever. So there's all these rabid, insane podcast fans. And then just like six or seven real grey-haired nomads in there sort of going, oh, what's all this about? And just sassing you out. And it's like, oh, you're friends with the family. Are you friends with my mum and dad?

It's like, no, we just want to know what's going on. Got to keep an eye on things. Oh, yeah, absolutely. The local police, the unofficial local police. Absolutely. Neighbourhood watch. Well, yeah, the manager of the violence society, he's the one who got us up there because he listens to the pod,

so you might have dealt with him up there. I don't know. I don't know if we did. I dealt more with the head chef in the kitchen because the head chef. Leopard head. The leopard head chef. I was filming a TV show, so obviously I was dealing more with the head chef than the bowls club.

What are you talking about? Sorry, in my own head that made sense, but I realise how bizarre it might have sounded. She employed one of the participants in the kitchen. Oh, sure. Okay, great. And she was fabulous, have sounded. She employed one of the participants in the kitchen. Oh, sure. Okay, great. And she was fabulous, absolutely fabulous. She was really cool.

So, yeah, that's why I didn't deal with the manager. Yeah. Wow, so the venue of one of our live podcasts is now featured in a TV series. Featured, the kitchen at least is featured in the TV. And they do have a function in there as well. Okay, a function. A function. And they do have a function in there as well.

Okay. A function? A function. One of the participants in the experiment organised a night to show him and his wife to show their culture and had music and dancing. It went off apparently. Everyone had a ball. Oh, great. It's like you showed your culture with little dum-dum puffs.

Yeah, yeah. Mary Brow does not know what's hit at the last two years. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was like, you know, I always thought Maribor was like, you know, pretty rough and then we brought our show in and brought their reputation down. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Damn.

Well, quickly speaking of music festivals just before, I wanted to tell this about I think the first time I met you, Zan, was at the Meredith Music Festival. Oh, okay. Where is this going to go? And I mentioned – I think the first time I met you, Zan, was at the Meredith Music Festival. Oh, okay. Do you remember? Where is this going to go? And I mentioned – Hang on.

Before, during or after when you were buying Mars bars on the way home? You really helped me through some dark times. I was there with Tom Ballard, who I mentioned earlier, and Tom introduced us and you said, Tommy Dassel, I recognise that name. And I'm thinking, here we go. You know, the name's getting out there. People are aware of what I'm doing in the world of showbiz.

A colleague of mine, a peer, Zan Rowe, and you go, yeah, I always see you liking Tom Ballard's posts on Facebook. Oh, my God, that's brutal. I love it. And then the next time I saw you was a little while later at a um at a i went to the j awards one year when they were down here my friend angus put me on the door and i went along and then we were at a drinks thing afterwards yeah and i was kick-ons kick-ons at a at a person's uh like's studio space next door to where it was.

And I just have this vague memory of being pretty gassed up and coming up to you and talking to you and telling you that story and you going, you've told me that story so many times tonight. Just on the press tour. You know when you just get – you're just at the right level of drunk where you just get stuck in a feedback loop of like you just got the goldfish memory. We get it. You know someone who knows leopard hair.

We get it. Just being like, oh, there's Zan. I haven't seen her yet. You told me like six times. I think I spoke to Tom the next day and I was like, Tom, we just kept on telling you the same story. This was the same night where we were at that after party or that kick-ons and there was nothing to drink there

and so I got on tipple and ordered some beers to be delivered. And because where it was was just like this, just like a warehouse that wasn't, like it wasn't clear where the address to it was. So I had to meet. It was where you do a drop basically yeah i had to meet the delivery driver in a car park next to the house next to the warehouse we were at and so he sells me like gives me the beers take them inside they disappear very quickly so then i'm just immediately ordering more on tipple again and then turn up to the same car park like 20 minutes later get the same driver

who there's no sign of a party nearby he's just seen me get like 24 beers by myself in a car park on a friday night and he's like same order again and i'm like i swear i'm at a party all right well no anyway man i better go i gotta've got a great story I've got to tell Zan Roge. I'm confident she's never heard before in her life, in spite of having been there. That was very kind of you, though, just to supply all these people with beers and for them to drink them before you probably even got one yourself.

Well, you know, hey, look, us high-flying podcasters, we've got to take care of the lowly ABC employees. That's true, yeah. We're all just like scraping through over there so thanks for looking down from your ivory tower at

us. Yeah, the Patreon money's come through. This one's on me guys. I can get around. Well you guys, we never get to record

out here but you guys are royalty because we're always stuck in the spare room and we've got a clean house here for once. I did note that as

soon as I walked in I was like wow, this looks lovely. But having said that I think it's more like I think Tommy's scared that you're going to see all his toys in his spare room. So I think maybe that's it. I don't know what he's talking about. What a weird thing to say.

What kind of toys? Sorry, guys, he's hysterical. Just gaslighting my podcast. What are you talking about? I don't have four different sets of Lego Mario in there. It's crazy. It's something a baby would do. All right, well, we'd better leave it there for another installment

of the Little Dum Dum Club. Miff and Zan, thank you so much for joining us. Thank you. It's been a blast. It's been so fun. I thought we were going to talk about music and we didn't even scratch it. I know. No, you did.

Nirvana. Oh, yeah. Tick. Nirvana. Oh, yeah. Tick. Nirvana. That's as close as we got to music. Also playing at music festivals. That was pretty good. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Now that we've got the

small country town stuff out of the way, maybe we can have you guys back sometime and do a music special. Love that. Because I asked Sandra to prepare some music stuff. Didn't even get to it. Doesn't matter. What did you prepare? Oh, not much. I said you've got to do a little tap dance on the air for us. Practice up.

Bring your special shoes. Where I launch my solo career. Yeah. Well, Meet the Neighbours, that's on SBS today when this episode drops. Oh, fantastic. All right. So get on SBS and look at my hometown, if nothing else. You're beautiful.

It is a beautiful hometown. If you didn't get to come to the live show, watch this show and find out what it looks like. Yeah. And find out. You can't see. We didn't tape any vision of our live podcast in Mirabarra, but at least you can see the venue.

You can play the podcast alongside Miff's TV show and see if it syncs up at any point. It's the same as paying Pink Floyd's album against The Wizard of Oz. It just gives a whole new meaning to your view of Maryborough. There's a lot of munchkins in Maryborough, so yeah. And, Zan, you've got Take 5, which is on At The Moment on the ABC and on iView. Yeah. Second season.

Second season. Well, the story I was going to tell you was about Noel Gallagher, so that was my one that I had prepared. We'll have to save that for next time. Right. He saw you liking Tom Ballard's Facebook post. And the ep is just you telling that story ten times to him. Exactly, yeah.

That was how I warmed him up. Yeah, no, Take Five's out and about, second series, and, yeah, it's been a lot of fun. So all on iView. And we've got a podcast as well bang on and spoilers for for take five episode three me and tommy were on it we pick uh me so horny two life crew that's a fucking great song advanced australia fair yeah shut up your face all the most meaningful songs to your lives can't wait to hear those stories very excited

let's dig deep i feel like there's going to be tears. Can I say something that you said to me over email about something you were trying to line up but couldn't? Here we go. Oh, God, I'm scared. You wanted to get – We can always edit it out. You tried to get Jamiroquai and he doesn't do interviews. Yeah, we did.

So as you well know, Jamiroquai is doing one show that you're not going to be able to see. Yeah. And you are going. Just seeing your eyes. Yeah, I know. The pain. I was like, hey, because we hit up MIF to do this. And then I was like, oh, let's get Zan as well.

Hey, Zan, we're doing the podcast with MIF on Friday. Can you do it? And you're like, oh, I'm actually going to Adelaide for Harvest Rock Festival to see Jamiroquai that day. I'm like, this just is brutal on so many levels. Sprinkling the salt in the wound. Sorry you didn't win the competition, by the way. I hear that you're really angry at the person who did, too.

You don't like the question that they won with? Absolutely not. It sucked. It's too much of just an interesting question. It's not funny. And comedy is the only thing that matters in life. What would have been your question? What was my...

Oh, you've done it. You've done it. It was, yeah, I put it in. It was something to the effect of, I can't go because it's my mum's birthday and we're going away for the weekend. And if I had won the competition that was VIP tickets and flights and a comm,

I was going to call mum and go, guess what, we're moving the venue of your birthday weekend. Also, when I was 12, I had cancer. My grandfather invented Vegemite. He was chucking everything in there. Yeah, just entering under all these different names. Are you going to be okay? I'll be all right.

I'm going to be sending you a selfie of me and JK in a couple of days. No, please do. Please. That would be great. It's going to be so good. Yeah, I'm looking forward to it. Because he's getting around in his tracksuit still. He's got the headdress, you know, all that.

But he's just totally dad mode 4000 these days. And I just, it looks like pure joy. It's that CBF energy that we all strive for. Absolutely. When you get to that age, you just want to be doing what you're doing and not giving a fuck. You've got to message me as the set's starting because I want to know immediately from eyes on the ground which of his six culturally inappropriate headdresses is it.

It's fascinating, isn't it? He sort of turned them into robot headdresses, but it's like I still know what the origin story of this headdress is. He's got that video clip where he debuted the robot one. He's got the one from the album before that was getting a bit of flack. And it's him kind of just like sending it off, doing like a burial for it, being like a farewell old friend.

We had some good times. On a canoe and then setting it alight just to be even more cultural. It's a bit of that. It's like, well, now this one's a robot. No one can be offended by that. Yes, white man, you tell me. No, it'll be fun.

A lot of funk. I want to see the set start. Just a clip of the set starting Yes white man You tell me No it'll be fun A lot of funk Gonna be good I wanna see the set start Just a clip of the set starting And then the phone Flipping around to your face Saying suck shit Yeah yeah

That's what I I need to And I'll show that to mum And be like Happy fucking birthday Well yeah Check out all that stuff guys Thank you so much

For joining us And we'll see you next time See you, mates. And they've done it again. From the Bang On podcast, Zenro and Miff Warhurst. What a ripper. Yeah, a lot of fun. What a treat to get those guys in when we don't know them super, super, super well,

and to have a ripper like that. And then if you enjoyed that, we did bonus Patreon episodes, two of them, straight afterwards. And they were great as well. Yeah. So if ever. What a productive little day for us. I know.

It's a nice one to get some different people on the show. And if you liked that, then you will love the bonus stuff going on. And we didn't even, you know, I walked here, Tommy, thinking we're going to do an hour about music. What are we we going to talk about music and i had like little plans and so did i i wrote up a whole list of songs that have funny stories behind them to talk about yep and we didn't get to any of them but the good thing is we've got um some stuff for next time including some stuff that's very timely at the moment that will make no sense in a year's time or anything like that.

Hey, nothing better than putting the time into prepping and then not needing it because you're just having a good time off the cuff. Yeah, yeah. No, you're right. You're right. There was bits there where I'm like, oh, wedge this in. No, that will sound shit. Yep.

I'll do this thing that I worked on in the 15 minutes before they turned up. This will go well. Well, hey, look, for the people that listen to that Marabara list I've got, some of you, some long-term listeners will have heard a little bit of that and some of you will, there's a few names I don't reckon I've ever brought up before. Yeah. And of course, there's some nice riffing from new people that haven't heard some of those names before.

But I did, the good thing about this is that I did find that list and it's a list of 150 people that have gone around, of a number of people. And some of them have no stories. Some of them, to bring up within that company, probably would not have been… Haven't aged very well. Haven't aged very well is a good way of saying it. And then there's some where I'm like, I never met this person. I've never heard of this person. But they just happen to be on this thing called the list yep um okay did you still have

the list easily accessible or did you have to message some people to no no no i i just i i searched through my computer i just put the list in to a couple of different ways yep because that's the way we used to call it the list yep yep uh and then any other documents pop up a few and so i actually so many documents popped up that i could i still couldn't find it yeah so you know how i found it you searched leopard yes yeah that's great i do that sometimes i'll search by what i think the subject of an email would have been, and then I'm like, oh, no, it can just be any word that's in the body of it. So just pick out something that you would have said that's specific to that. Do you want me to say a couple of other names that I have no idea why they're in the list?

I don't know the story behind them. I don't know the person. I wasn't responsible for any of the names. Well well maybe given that we're about to already read some names maybe you could assign some of these bonus names to some of our patreons that's a good one okay that's a good that's good all right let's do that then well yeah let's get into it uh you can get onto patreon.com slash little dum-dum club and you can support the show. We very much appreciate it. It keeps us gainfully employed, lets us lord our fat stacks over two ABC and SBS employees.

Feels great. And you get two bonus mini episodes during the week, which we mentioned before. And, yeah, we've got two coming up with Zan and Miff. And, look, the thing that everyone really gets on there for people messages and they go look we i don't even bother downloading the episodes that you put up you could you don't have to bother doing that anymore because what i'm really in it for is to potentially get my name read out at the end of an episode that's it we get a lot of we we

look at the um the metrics and a lot of people i don't even know how you do this but they only they only download the second half of this show. They only download Talking Dumb Dumb, which is really weird. I could not tell you how you can do that. You've got to really go into the back end and do a lot of like fuck around with the code to sort of tell your computer, start the file from 50% of the way through the file. Yeah. start the file from 50% of the way through the file. Yeah.

If there hasn't been a name read out within five minutes, don't download any of this bit. Yeah. Well, and this episode would have really thrown it off. People unfortunately accidentally listened to the first bit for once. Well, do some of those things count as names? I don't know. Yeah, true.

Yeah. True. I don't know about that. But anyway, here we go. Let's get into it. We've, of course, got the unplanned title alternator here to keep things fair. Yeah. Yeah. And look, we've got the unplanned title alternator and we've also set it to Miraburra speed as

well. There's a little hashtag Miraburra. It'll assign this name, a normal, one of you subscriber names with a Maryborough list name. Well, this is like when you're searching in your email and you can go like, search for this, but also exclude these terms. You know, you can like put those kinds of thing in. So this is like you going search for names, but also assign Maryborough name. Yes.

It's like a new update that just came out on the UTA. Yeah. That we're, and it's only for Maryborough based things. You can't do it for anywhere. It must have come up because of the new show with Miff in it. Yeah, yeah. It's a brand activation. Yeah, they know that Maryborough is about to go trending.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a cross promo. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Which, you know, hey, I'm looking forward to that show and looking forward to, like you said, you know, everyone enjoyed going to Mirabar when they did go there. Hopefully it's a positive thing for the town because the town is growing. It's actually growing. It's actually getting bigger and it's meaning that it's getting bigger.

The cool thing is about that show is that they've brought up people that are needed like doctors and, like doctors and people in country Victoria. It's actually hard. It's hard to entice doctors and people in those sort of positions to go and work in country areas because, well, people like us. If someone said to us, can you move to the country, please? We'd go, no, thank you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And a lot of people have that mindset, so it's good to get people.

They need more like cops, unfortunately, because it's SBS doing this that they've ended up with inspector rex yeah but better than nothing that's fine um because it's sbs there is a lot of naked women that have been attracted up to me which is good a lot of soccer players cartman and the boys hanging out now at the bus stop. Yeah, yeah. No, there is actually, one of the people is a cricketer as well. Oh, yeah. For some reason. Cool.

So I don't know why, but anyway. Because you can't be a full-time cricketer and go to Maryborough. Yeah. All right, let's do it. Let's do it. Let's get into it. Let's read out a bunch of names from the Patreon list and then from the Merit Royalist. Thank you very much to Patreon subscriber Rosemary Phillips.

Rosemary Phillips? Yeah. I like this. Rosemary Phillips, yeah. That sounds like a real reputable person. Now, maybe I'm calling this too early, but I would love in honour of the Bang On Girls being on the show an all-lady edition of the Patreon read. Absolutely impossible.

Sorry about that. But no. No. That's not happening. If you had to give me a little bit of notice, maybe. All right. Yeah. Rosemary Phillips.

I like the name Rosemary. It sounds like the most reputable person to ever subscribe to this Patreon. Sounds like a lawyer i would say just sounds like a a nice lady that lives in an actual house rather than a flat or anything like that yep yep some sort of picket fence that sort of thing now what now some sort of leaving a pie out on a windowsill oh yeah someone floating through the air to try and steal it well not bell that's not much to do with Rosemary Phillips, but yeah. No, well, the quality of the pie.

Yeah. She's left it on the windowsill to cool. One of those pies that has the divots in them, the holes in them, that I've never actually seen in real life. Yeah. Now, the big question, of course, is if Rosemary Phillips had lived in Maryborough 35 years ago. Yeah. Her sponsor child in Maryborough.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because I had that happen once. Like when I was in high school in like, I don't know, maybe year 10 or year. Yeah, maybe year 10. I remember we came down to the big smoke. We came down to big stinky itself, Melbourne. Yep. And we were sort of billeted.

Oh, we had We had city Was this this shit Where you come on If you're in the country And you go on school camp You come and stay in the city No that was different

We did do that as well Which was great fun Yep But we did have a thing Where we We had sort of like A sister School

For five seconds Oh yeah Where we went Oh we'll go I think it was in like it was in a nice area as well it was in paran or something like that turak or paran and then there was some these bumpkin fucking idiot kids and then we'd get we get we got paired up with like some posh kids and smart rich kids and we're like this is fucking weird and then those kids got um sent up at some

point to live in mirabar for like a week. Okay. And I remember, I don't think they liked it very much. Yeah, that would make sense. They were pretty well off. I believe it. Yeah, they were pretty well off. I'm pretty sure I got paired up with this kid because I think I was like generally reasonably smart at school.

And I think they'd just introduced science as a subject. Right. And I was like, oh, okay, I know the basics of this. And they're like, oh, you love science. I'm i'm like no i just am not completely fucked in the head and then i got paired up with some cunt that was like fucking super brain box of science i'm like i got nothing for this kid yeah and so we were paired up and i think pretty quickly they just took the kid off me and went nah you can you can you're leading this kid astray yeah yeah yeah you can be with someone else and so this kid didn't even get billeted with me in Maribor.

He got sent to live with someone else instead. I'm like, fucking fine by me. All right, see ya. Fine by me. I don't have to talk about the fucking double helix with some cunt. Yeah. I don't care about it. That's fine.

So that's what this is. Rosemary Phillips, you're being billeted with a Mirabar resident of 1992 or something like that. So congratulations, Rosemary Phillips. You're being billeted with number 123 on the list here, which is of the Mirabar list, which is Glenn Ibadibadib. Glenn Ibadibadib. Yep. Glen Ibadibadib. Glen Ibadibadib. Yep.

I guess Glen Ibadibadib sort of is the, like, Rosemary Fields is such a prestigious sounding name. And then Glen Ibadibadib may well be the opposite. Look, phonetically, that's the most fun name on this list. Yep. Glen Ibadibadib. It's just fun to say. I think they kind of go together.

Yeah, a little bit. Yeah. Now, I don't know what Glen Ibedibbedib's real name is. I believe that that's an extension of something that sounded a little bit like that that someone just turned into. You know what I mean? It sounds like someone... It's an exaggeration.

Yeah, it sounds like it's a long way around of saying he's studded something at some point. It's kind of like you're trying to write out a script for Porky Pig. Yeah, right. I think maybe his name was maybe like Glenn Ibadib or something, and they've gone, let's go for this. Let's chuck another couple of dibs in there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's enough.

Yeah, yeah. Let's have some fun with this one. But it's certainly one that when we used to talk to people, our friends in Ballarat, they were fixated on. They wanted to meet Glenn Ibadibadib because they just wanted to say the name. Yeah, I like it. Lovely to meet you, Mr. Ibadib. Yeah. Wait, meet Glenn Ibidibidib. Yeah. Because I just wanted to say the name. Yeah, I like it. Yeah. Lovely to meet you,

Mr. Ibidib. Yeah. Wait, Mr. Ibidibidib. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Glenn Ibidibidib. Well, thanks, Rosemary.

Yeah, thanks, Rosemary. Thanks, Rosemary. And thanks, Glenn. Have fun with Glenn. Yeah. If you do stay at Glenn's house, at the, at Casa del Ibidibidib.

Ibidibidib. Yep. Have fun. Thanks, Rosemary. Thank you very much to. Yep. Have fun. Thanks, Rosary. Thank you very much to Patrons and Subscriber. Well, this is one of these ones where they don't give the full name. Oh, God. So I'm just going to have to deal with what I've given.

Thank you very much to Patrons and Subscriber Bunkle. B-U-N-K-L-H. Which document are you reading this one from? Yeah, right. Have you jumped this one from? Yeah, right. Have you jumped ahead? No, no, no. This is a subscriber. Wow, I can't wait to see the funny name that we pair with Bunk Bunkle.

Yes. Bunkle. Again, B-U-N-K-L-H. That's what you've supplied. So that's what you're getting. I like the name Bunk. Bunk's good. Bunk's one of the detectives in The Wire.

So I've got a soft spot for the name because of that. Hey, it's up there with the top five names of beds I know. Yeah. So that's something. Yep. What are the other ones? King. Yep.

Queen. Yep. Single. Yep. Bunk. Bunk. Race car. Race car, yeah.

Ocean. Yep. Yep. Yep. Single? Yep. Bunk? Race car? Race car, yeah. Ocean? Yep. Yep. Yep. Hmm. See, there you go. This is the top five. Yeah, that's the top five.

This is the top five. It's rare that you have a category where the top five is also the five. Yes. So, what do you pair with bunkle, you may ask? Bunkle, you may ask? Bunkle. Maybe I should, maybe it should be one where I pair it with another single sort of name. Yep. Okay.

Let's see. This is really that thing you were describing. It does. We had a similar-ish thing at my primary school. thing at my primary school it was like prep to grade two on one little campus and then a big park and then the big school on the other side of the park and before graduating up to the big school you went and you met like what would you call it like a not like a big brother but like a you know someone in the grade above you that would be your sort of like you know show you the ropes when you get to that big you know

the idea being like hey if you ever need help or whatever we've got this older kid is gonna like show you around yeah and i remember just being like as if i'm ever gonna go to this older kid and you know that's so intimidating going up to some older kid being like where's the toilet yeah can i look can i do this i'm gonna do just a run of names okay and then i'm and the last one will be the one that that bunk that bunks billeted with yeah i'll just do a run of the names just to show you what it's like to read through this list instead of like instead of like me picking the eyes out of it and going here's a good one it's a good name there's a good story about it it sounds like this whole list is great.

I'll show you that it can be quite ordinary and also quite fucking dumb. Yeah, okay. And I don't even have the stories behind any of these run of names. Okay, sure. Here we go. Number 59, Horse Eyes. Number 60, Maxi. Number 61, The Ugly Girls.

Number 62, Henwood. Number 63, Honger and Bonger. Number 64, Bog. Number 65, Bum. Number 66. It takes 65 to get round to bum. I don't know who bum is. No idea who bum is.

Number 66, morgo. Number 67, morgo. Okay. I don't know if there's two morgos. Is that an error? I don't know if this is a clerical error or not. Yeah, okay. But I just like the idea.

More morgo. I want to bill it bunk with morgo, with either of the morgos or both of them. I don't know, again, bill it bunk with Morgo, with either of the Morgos or both of them. I don't know, again, if it's an admin error, but I do like the idea that there's two people called Morgo, and they're both interesting enough to put on this list because Morgo's not a very interesting name. Well, and the fact that they were discovered consecutively. Yes.

It's not like 30 names later, like, oh, fuck, another Morgo. Yeah, and also, the way this list was concocted it was like shared around 10 people so it'd be like sure it'd be sent to me at number 65 and so this might have happened like see it's come to me it's up to 66 morgo and then i've gone fuck i know there's that morgo but you've forgotten about the other morgo i've discovered also discovered a great morgo you You forgot the other morgo that I know. I'm sure I would have said this on the show many times, but at my school we had identical twins who were both albino and their nicknames were Milky and Silky.

Right. Great. Great. I get Milky, but Silky? Yeah, I don't know. Why Silky? It just sounds good. Well, it rhymes with Milky.

They're twins. They've got to have the same. You've got to give them names that rhyme. Is anyone doing that these days? The Milky Bar twins. Cranking out twins and giving them rhyming names? I'd like to think if I was in that position, that would be my move. Well, what's the rhyming name you'd do?

Well, I don't know. You know, like on The Simpsons, there's those two girls in Bart's class called Sherry and Terry. Oh, yeah. You'd have to be... I think you'd have to be thinking of something like that. What is it? Benny and Kenny. Something like that.

There you go. Yeah. That's okay. Or I could just, I've talked about this, but I could do the move that my grandparents did. Had twins, boy and girl, and named them after themselves. That's insane. Insane stuff. Absolutely.

Truly insane stuff. That should be brought up on every episode. Someone said to me the other day, like, you should do stand-up about it. And I'm like, I think I'm too close. You know what I mean? It's like, I don't, I think I'm too close. You know what I mean? It's like, I don't really know what to do with it. You know what I mean? It's like, it took me a long time to realize that it was weird.

And then it's like, I don't really know what my angle is. It's just like, pretty strange, huh? Yeah, yeah. Like, I'm kind of too close to it to even, like, think of jokes. Yeah, it's funny. Well, I'll do it then. Okay. Maybe I'll hold it.

Write in. Write in with your best joke for me to do about my mum and uncle being named after their parents. Great. And I'll put together a set of all the contest winners. Yeah. All right. Well, thanks, Bunkle. Thanks, Bunkle.

I hope you're happy with either. You take your pick of the Morgos yeah yeah yeah yeah thank you and then let us know which one you're not using

because we might use that for another Patreon yeah for another week yeah easy thank you very much to Patreon subscriber Darcy Roy Davis Darcy

Roy Davis yes is Roy Davis hyphenated or is Roy the middle name just middle name I believe I like the name Roy I gotta just middle name, I believe.

I like the name Roy, I've got to say. Look, to be honest, I put Roy in there. Maybe he doesn't go by Darcy Roy Davis, but it was in his email address. Okay. And so I've generously put that in there. Yeah. I mean, I can just go with Darcy Davis because, of course, that makes him double D. Oh, of course. Something very close to our heart and very close to other people's hearts.

We were having a conversation the other day, a few of us. That classic topic, what would you have been called? What were you nearly called or what would you have been called if you were the different gender? And I never knew this. If my girlfriend had been a boy, she would have been called Dougal. Wow. That's good. That's pretty out there.

Refresh me. What were you? Ariel. I don't remember that at all. The Little Mermaid. I don't remember that at all. Yep. Are you before Little Mermaid or after?

Yeah, I'm before. So where did they get that from? Don't know. That's insane. Yeah. Ariel Alsop. And I mean, it would have, I guess I'm like. I could not have known that.

Surely not. No, it's come, I've talked about it. Fuck me. It's come up. It's definitely come up. But it, yeah, I mean, it's funny because like, I was about to say, well, then the movie would have come out and that would have been all I got. Yeah.

But I mean, I'm kind of in the same position with like, because when's Thomas the Tank Engine start? Like, that's after me being born. Oh, yeah. So that's all I got at school. That's all what you got. So it's like I'm already, there's already like a cultural thing that comes along. Did you get that in a good way though?

Was that good? It was kind of neither. Like it was just kind of like, ah, Thomas the Tank Engine. Yeah. It's like. But was there a time where all of your, you know, fellow mates were into Thomas the Tank Engine? And it was like, cool.

All of your fellow mates were into Thomas the Tank Engine? It was like, cool. Well, not that I remember. I don't remember it being a show that people would watch and discuss at school. I think it's more like preschool. You know what I mean? I just want to be... It's really for babies. If my child was called Ariel, it would be like awesome.

You know? She'd love it? Yeah. But her and her friends are into The Little Mermaid. Yeah, okay. If she was named after... what's fucking Frozen called again? Oh, Elsa. Elsa and the other one.

Yeah, if they were called that, that would be like, oh my God. That's a good point, actually, because The Little Mermaid has just come around. You know, there's a live action one from like this year. Yes. So I would be getting it all over again. Yes. Just be like, finally, I'm free of this fucking nickname yeah oh no yeah just reading like six years ago disney plans to make a lot of live action adaptations of their

cartoon classics and being like oh no well you wouldn't call oh god no i don't think it's gone that well it's not that great i've seen it yeah it's okay it's pretty crappy it's okay it doesn't i don't know all of those are a bit like, why does this exist? Yeah, that's a good one to question because I watched it and went, I think this is sort of for me. Yeah. And I don't want to watch it. I went to a preview screening of it and there were two gay guys sitting near me and one of them got in there just like as the lights were going down. And he'd gotten like fucking like six drinks for the two of them to drink during the movie and i hear his

mate as he sits down his mate goes jesus that's a lot of drinks and then his friend very loudly goes oh please we're homosexuals yeah of course we have to get fucking blind during the live action Little Mermaid. Yeah, during a children's movie. Well, Darcy Roy Davis, who are you being paired up with? I think you are being paired up with... Number 109, Acid Liquor. Acid Liquor? Yeah.

Yeah, okay. Who I believe got the name because their face looked like they'd just licked acid. Sort of melted off. No, no, not just. I think it had a bit of a look. Oh, like a permanent. Like they're just. Kind of what you'd call resting bitch face a little bit. Maybe, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Like permanent, yeah. Not as in licked acid as in it's just been to a rave or something a little bit. Maybe, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like permanent, yeah. Not as in licked acid as in has just been to a rave or something, but like licked a battery. Those people that their default is they look like they've just smelled something really bad. You know you see those people on like a tram or whatever and you're like, God, that's a rough existence. Yeah, well, for everyone else because they have to see it.

For them, they don't have to see anything. Yeah, good point. They don't even know. Yeah, good point. I was in a cafe the other day and I saw an item on the menu. A guy was complimenting the hat I was wearing. And he was like, oh, and I love this bit of it and I love this bit of it. And I was like, yeah, it must be nice.

I can't fucking see it. It's not for me. I did this for you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is my little treat to the world. Yeah, yeah must be nice. Yeah. I can't fucking see it. Yeah, yeah. It's not for me. I did this for you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is my little treat to the world. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is a selfless act. Yeah.

Good for you for brightening up people's lives like that. Well, thanks, Darcy Roy Davis. Thanks, DRD. And have fun with acid liquor. Yeah. You've earned it. Thank you very much to Patreon subscriber Phil Remington. Phil Remington.

That's right. Yeah. Phil Remington. What's Remington Steel? Yes. What is that? Is that an old show? Yes.

Soap opera? Mid-80s. No, it was like a... You know what it was? Is that the show Pierce Brosnan was on? Yeah, right. That's basically a probably three to five year audition for James Bond

yeah he was it was one of those ones where he did that he was a very James Bond ish character guy that went around in a tuxedo

a lot of the time did some spy sort of stuff right and then it was like but on a TV show but it's but it was it

I always thought it was like a daytime soap no oh it wasn't okay no I always had in my head that it was like a daytime soap. No. Oh, it wasn't. Okay. I always had in my head that it was like some, you know, kind of crappy. No. Okay.

No, it was a minorly successful show. But it was one of those ones where it was like, oh, this is sort of a cheap version of James Bond. Well, you wouldn't give it the full James Bond to that guy. Oh, no, they did. Yeah. But which is fine because the previous James Bond bond was roger moore who yes was also a cheap version of james bond in a show called the saint yeah okay so it was sort of like the the cubby broccoli and and co who were behind the bond franchise so they're not yeah they're not really it's like that thing where you go for an audition and they're like now um the the role

that you'll be playing in this ad is an office worker so we're going to need you to come in in office attire. And it's like, you can't just imagine what I might look like in a college shirt. It's like they have no capacity to, like, picture this person in a tuxedo. It's like they only can be up for the role if they do the hard work for us of providing us a video of them as a spy. They need to see five years in the reserves. Yeah. In the seconds.

Yeah. They don't want someone coming in first day and going, you know what, you're in the team straight away. So we could solve the great mystery of who's going to be the next Bond. So where did Craig come from? Because he seemed like he kind of came out of nowhere. I certainly wasn't familiar with him before he got that role. There was one movie where he was a minorly successful movie where he was blonde. Yeah, okay.

What was it? But was he doing sort of, you know, was it action-y, secret-age-y kind of stuff? You know what? I'm going to look it up because I know it had like a food. There was a, what's his name again? Daniel Craig. Daniel Craig. Fuck, I just looked up Craig David.

That's not him. What's his name again? Daniel Craig. Daniel Craig. Fuck, I just looked up Craig David. Yes. Who? I mean, yeah. That's not him. Who's been doing spy stuff that they... Layer Cake. Was it called Layer Cake? Oh, yeah, okay.

It's a Guy Ritchie movie. Yeah. Yeah. So I think that was his James Bond audition or whatever. Right. So the next Bond is going to be probably someone who's recently been playing a secret agent. I've got it. Tom Cruise.

Oh, wow. Okay, done. Wow. They've really put him through the wringer for the last 20 years or so to get him to earn this one. Yeah. Layer Cake. Yeah. Now, was that a spy movie?

Was that sort of a spy movie? That actually would be cool. You know how a big part of it... There you go. A successful cocaine dealer gets two tough assignments from his boss on the eve of his early planned retirement. Okay, so it's adjacent to the kind of stuff they're doing. Yeah.

A big plot point of the Mission Impossible movies is that they've got this stupid machine that can print out rubber masks of people's faces. Oh, yeah. So it's like, you know, oh, cool, we can just be anyone. So it would be cool if they did the next James Bond movie, they introduce the new Bond, it's some unknown, and then just in the last, like, five minutes of the film,

they pull their head off and it's been Tom Cruise as his Mission Impossible character. Oh, right. As the new James Bond the whole time. Right. Great. Well, Phil Remington, you are being paired with number 89 on the list. Harry Ha Ha.

Harry Ha Ha. Yep. Is that you? Is this one of the names that you were going to do your first open mic? Oh, no, no. I'd love that. Harry Ha Ha. That is a great name, isn't it, for a comic?

Yep. Harry Ha Ha. So what is the, yeah, what's the story? I don't believe, I kind of think this is a guy that laughed a lot. Okay. Yeah, I think. First name Harry? This is, I don't think so.

Great. Yeah, I think that's just one of those great things, you know, where it's like someone's, you know, say you've got size 16 feet. We don't need to use your name Tommy. We just need to say. Billy Bigfeet. Billy Bigfoot.

Yep. Yep. One of those ones. Yep. Yeah. Yeah, good. I liked that you said, by the way, on the episode that there was a committee that came up with this list.

And I love the idea that it is truly like a person can't go on the list unless they get, you know, it needs to be majority vote. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you're like up all night. It's like, you know, sequestered, just like really at each other's throats. 12 Angry Men style.

Leopardhead needs to go on there. I think Morgo proves that that was not the case. No. There's one member of the committee who was putting on things where I'm like, I don't know where you're pulling these from. Right. This is just two words that you think sounded together. This is someone you saw walk past one day and went, oh, your name's Gary.

That's on the list. I'm like, okay. Yeah. That's fine. I don't care that much. Yeah. I don't know. That's fine. Yeah. I don't care that much. Yeah.

I do remember when it was going around, it was like, it was like a, what do you call it? Like a chain letter. Oh, yeah. Each person was adding five to the list at every point. Forward, forward, reply, forward, forward, reply. Yes. The list. Yes. Yes, yes, yes, yes.

Yeah. Yeah. Those ones that you get where it's got the you know the like little spacing that most email clients will put where it's like so you start the email and it's like the text is all the way across to one side yeah yeah yeah yeah there's a lot of like editing before you have to send it to someone else you have to get rid of all the fucking all the bullshits yeah just all of a sudden you go there's just shit from like 15 emails ago in here. We're not even talking about this anymore.

There's a lot of syntax. There's a lot of lines. There's a lot of fucking O's and 1's or whatever. Isn't it crazy to think about like Gmail and then the Apple iPhone? Remember every text you got from someone would just come up as its own unique thing in your inbox? And then Apple going, just a conversation with someone. What if it's just all on the one page? And Gmail sort of doing the same thing,

being like, what if you kept all these together? And then you can just easily look back through the conversation. Really crazy when you think about how long it took for someone to go, yeah, that's what it should be. Harry Ha Ha.

Harry Ha Ha. I like it. Yes. Thank you. Thanks, Harry Ha Ha. No, not thanks, Harry Ha Ha. Harry Ha Ha. I like it. Yes. Thank you. Thanks, Harry Ha Ha. No, not thanks, Harry Ha Ha. Thanks, Phil, Phil Remington. Yeah.

Well, I mean, thanks, Harry Ha Ha as well. I imagine he's, you know, he's brought joy to someone in Maryborough over the years. Well, he's brought joy to us now. Yeah, exactly. Just reminiscing. Yeah. Uh, all right. Let's just do one more.

Okay. Uh, it's been a long day for us. It has been. Um. Big day in the reminiscing. Yeah. All right. Let's just do one more. Okay. It's been a long day for us. It has been. Big day in the content mines. Yep. Let's just do one more. Thank you very much to Patreon subscribers. Oh, wow.

What? This is actually... Oh, my God. I'm just double checking. This is actually the first time someone subscribed that's actually on both lists. Okay. That's crazy on both lists. Okay. That's crazy. Yeah.

All right. Thank you very much to Patreon. That is weird. Thank you very much to Patreon subscriber Comedy Head. Comedy Head? Yeah. Wow. Yeah.

What number are they on the... 69. Yeah, right. Yeah. You read out 69 before. Okay. No, I'm pretty sure I didn't, I think. Maybe.

Who knows? But yeah, man. Wow. Can you remember the story behind... Crazy story behind this guy. Well, I've got sure I didn't, I think. Maybe, who knows? But, yeah, man. Wow. Can you remember the story behind? Crazy story behind this guy. Well, I've got two questions. Yes. Who do you think the real, the comedy head who subscribes to us, who are they?

Yes. And what's the story behind comedy head from the Maryborough list? Well, they're the same person, I believe. Oh, okay. Yeah, don't you think? So it's not just a coincidence. Well, I don't know. They must be the only one.

You tell me, you're looking at the evidence. Yeah, and I'm telling you it's the same person. Okay, it's the same person. Shall we say, okay. Yeah, don't you think? So it's not just a coincidence. Well, I don't know. There must be only one. You tell me. You're looking at the evidence. Yeah, and I'm telling you it's the same person. It's the same person. Shall we say. Yeah. So maybe someone that remembers you from your youth in Maryborough. Yeah, maybe. Maybe.

And has kind of followed your life this whole time. And is just fact-checking everything that I'm talking about, old stories and stuff like that. Or someone who just enjoyed the funny things I was saying in the hallways of Maryborough High School back in the day and went, man, I miss all those funny things that 17-year-old was saying. If only I could pay to hear them again. That's the funniest fucking person I've ever met in my life. 30 years later.

30 years later, he's just found me and gone, oh my God, what I've been. You know that thing, you still have crushes on like a girl from high school. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You still fondly think of someone or whatever. He's had a comedy crush. That's this guy, right. And you don't know where the name comedy head comes from.

I think I remember one day this guy was walking along and we saw him and we went, man, this guy's head looks like comedy. I get it. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. We all agreed. We all agreed. We all kind of know what that means. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

In some way. Don't you think? Yeah. Yeah. I mean, look, it was a similar story to the guy we knew called Drama Head. Yeah, yeah. You just know. Yeah.

You just saw it. Just a different genre in a way. Yeah, yeah. You just know. Yeah. You just saw it. Just a different genre in a way. Yeah. Yeah. Well, lucky for you, this is happening late enough in the day where I can't be

fucking arguing with anything that's just come up. And unlucky for people at home listening to it that it's late enough in the day that I can't be fucking thinking of something better.

Well, thanks everyone for listening. Come see us in Perth November the 4th, this Saturday. Also this Friday, I'll be there November the 3rd

doing my solo show at the Oasis Comedy Club. But yeah, get on, get your tickets. We'll be there having a fucking fun old weekend over in Perth. WA.

It's going to be great. LittleDumbDumbClub.com for your tickets. And thank you for listening and we will see you next time. See you, mate.