The Little Dum Dum Club with Tommy & Karl - Episode 148 - Luke McGregor & Michael Hing

Episode Date: July 24, 2013

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Hey mates, welcome once again into the little dum-dum club for another week. Thank you very much for joining us. My name is Tommy Dasolo, sitting opposite me with a bigger beard than in weeks previous, Carl Chandler. G'day Dickhead. It's getting big there. We got some criticism for the last time we talked about your beard. People found the story, the quote unquoteunquote story, to be boring,

which now makes me just want to bring it up more and more and more. Whoever tweeted, I can't remember who tweeted this, but someone tweeted by saying, I didn't like the story about your beard. I'm not sure if there was much of a tale. I think there was a mention that I had a beard. Yeah. So you'll probably hate that long story I just told then.

Yeah, they're gone now. They've turned off. So now that just the true fans are still listening. Just the true fans of the epic tale. That is my beard. Now, actually, something happened the other night where, you know, I say, as I said before, G'day Dickhead, at the start of the show, I was at a gig the other night, and you know when...

So casual about it. Yeah. I mean, as we're all aware, like I said before. Yeah, callback. So before... Article 7 in this podcast. Yes. Yes. As you'll have noticed. we're all aware like I said before yeah call back so um article 7 in this podcast yes

as you'll have noticed um I was at a gig and it was a little bit confusing because you know sometimes you go to gigs and people that listen to the the podcast will turn up

and talk to you and whatever and that's nice but I had someone walk past the other night at a gig just walk past and go you dickhead

and then just walk past and I'm like are you a fan of the show? Or are you just not a fan of me? It's very blurred lines there. Whether you like me or don't like me. So your car breaks down on Kingsway in peak hour and people are just driving past going, you fucking dickhead.

And you're like, just always nice to meet the fans. Keep listening, guys. Thanks for your support. I hate you. Oh, did you listen to meet the fans. Keep listening, guys. Thanks for your support. I hate you. Oh, did you listen to last week's? Oh, great. Go kill yourself, you fucking piece of shit. It's a good episode, right?

I'll say hello to Tommy for you. Yeah, no worries. Dude, what a hole you've dug for yourself where the line between... Yeah, because my response, it had to be like, it was like, you dickhead. And then I'm like, oh, yeah. Right. Yep. But that's a nice world to live in

where, you know, people abuse you and you think it's a positive thing. Yeah, yeah. It's like you've kind of hypnotized yourself to not hear the... Yeah. Yeah, and you could do with seeing a little bit less of the negative out there in the world.

So this is ultimately a good thing for you. Yeah, yeah. So, yeah. No, well, let's not say that because then I'm going to cop nothing but that happened from now on. That's how things work. Go fuck yourself, you asshole. Big fan.

Today on the program, first of all, making his first appearance on our show, you may have seen him on Can of Worms. Please welcome him to the Little Dumb Dumb Club, Michael Hing. Yeah. Hello, everybody. How you going there, buddy? Pretty great. I'm just in Melbourne for a week, and I've been hanging out,

been seeing a lot of you fellas. It's been fantastic. Yeah. That's it. That's all I've got. Well, thanks for dropping in. Sorry you can't stay for longer. Also making a return to the program,

you will have seen him recently on Dirty Laundry Live. He recently won the Best Newcomer Award at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival. Please welcome back into the little dum-dum club, Luke McGregor. Yay! Thanks, guys. I think the last time you came up on the show, we were in Sydney doing our live episode there.

And because Xavier Michaelides does such a great impression of you, he was there and we thought it would be funny to kind of build it up as if you were coming out and then have Xavier coming out. But as soon as we introduced it, as soon as we even said, he just recently won Best Newcomer at the Melbourne Comedy Festival, the front row's faces lit up. Like people were like nudging their friends next to them and going,

oh, my God, I thought he wasn't going to be here. One of them was like, what a fucking arsehole. I'm like, I know that's my fan actually. And then Xavier came out and just the look of disgust and disappointment. I think that was due to the ill-fitting T-shirt he was wearing at the time. No, I think Xavier. Yeah, but it was a real insight into the... The cult of the giggle.

Yeah, the cult of McGregor. Well, that's nice, I guess. Well, sucked in Xavier. You can have a writer reply. You can do your impersonation of Xavier right now if you'd like. No. That actually literally sounded like him. Yeah, that was good.

That was good. That says to me that you've been practicing that by yourself in your bedroom. I do. Oh, jeez. Look at all the Xavier fans coming in now. Once they thought they heard him, now they're all trampling inside the house. Is that how fandom works? Just as soon as you hear the person's voice, you're just like drawn to it?

It's like a whistle. On that, on what you were talking about before about G'day Dickhead, I had a guy, I did a gig once and I just bought a new shirt and it looked like a shirt I thought it was really nice but as soon as I bought it I'm like it looked like a shirt

your mum would get you Right that you have to wear because your mum got it for you and I bought it and I did a gig and as soon as I got up on stage some guy goes

nice shirt and I go thank you and got him and yeah you get better at that you know And I go, thank you, and got him. Yeah, you get better at that. That's when they walked on stage with the best newcomer award.

The king of sting. Yeah, he, and then I was in the, it just sort of stuck with me, and then in the supermarket, like three days later, I was doing roadshow show and I just went and a guy came up walking past me and goes

nice shirt and I went what was that mate not too aggressive but just kind of like you know like he was having a go yeah

and he goes nice shirt and I'm like what's wrong and he goes I go what's wrong with it and I was I was a little bit aggressive

because I was thinking it was this guy I just think another guy was having a crack yeah you've been self conscious about this shirt yeah and then the guy goes

nice show I'm like ah he goes no no nice show I saw it last night oh thanks buddy alright see ya so maybe that's what you were being heckled with

before someone yelling out nice show mid punchline keep doing continue with this I'm a big fan of it So maybe that's what you were being heckled with before. Someone yelling out, nice show, mid-punch song. Keep doing, continue with this. I'm a big fan of it. I don't want to see it end any time soon, that's for sure. I'll check in with you in 15 minutes and let you know if I'm ready for it to wrap up.

Are you wearing the shirt right now? No, I'm not. It hasn't come out since... Oh, yeah, it's been locked away. But it did make me re-evaluate. Because I used to... I tend to go... I tend to...

Whenever someone used to yell at me, it was... Because up until I started doing comedy, it was usually because it was, like, an insult or something. Like, some sort of negative thing. So I always got my sort of backups ready to defend.

Yeah. But now it's... You know, now people will come up to you and actually say, you know, I saw you at a gig or something. And so I'm trying to, it's slowly making me see the world as a better place. Well, I may have ruined this slightly

by telling two of the people here before but something similar happened last night. I saw some friends that listened to the show and they hadn't listened for a while and they listened to the episode a couple of weeks ago where I talked about being on a talent show which has tended to be a popular one. Hypothetically, you may have talked about that on the podcast.

Someone talked about it. Let's imagine that someone brought that up. If someone did do that, we're going to get back into that. Jesus Christ. Anyway, I met a friend last night on The Listens and he sort of made it clear that he hadn't listened for a while and he decided to listen to that one.

And he was like, oh. And he couldn't have been more complimentary. He's like, oh my God, it was so funny. It was, I, I did take my headphones off. I was like laughing and I was like, I was taking my headphones off to make sure I wasn't laughing too loud. I took my headphones off, I was laughing so loud the whole office could hear me. I was crying.

It was so funny. I just couldn't believe how funny it was. It was so great. Then I listened to your next episode. That was fucking shit. I was like, what the fuck's wrong with this episode? I'm going to go back to listen to the other one. So that other one was good, but this one, fuck, it sent me to sleep.

It was so bad. Yeah, just leave that bit out. Yeah. But just over the top. He was so passionate about both of them. I'm like, yeah, all right, I get both of them. But have a guess at which one I want to hear more. A lady did the gig.

I did a footy club gig. I didn't have a great one. And a lady came up afterwards and goes, hey, I really like the start and the end, but the middle was shit. She said, you're going to work on – I'd just lose all that stuff in the middle. That's great. So your gig's now just you going, hey, everyone, great to be here.

Thanks for having me. And this guy's the best. You've got to get an intermission in the middle of your five. That's what you've got to get. You should just drop the act. Yeah, just have a bit where people can go and buy ice cream in the middle or something. Now, Hing, I saw you last night and Luke as well.

We were both, the three of us were at a party together. Now, I mentioned this the other week. I'm in the middle of Dry July at the moment. I'm not drinking. And last night was the first night I had gone to a party while doing Dry July. And you, luckily, Michael, we got there at the same time. Which was right at the start before anyone else, because that's the coolest way.

And it was that really awful bit. That's when the Dry July people should be turning up as well. Yeah, it's just the most awful. It's awful, though, the first hour of any party where there's four of you there. And it was kind of good because the four of us there kind of know each other. But when four random people who kind of don't know each other, when they all turn up at once and there's that awkward bit and, you know, the host is there going, God,

I hope this isn't it. This is, and it's, you know, it's a bit quiet. The conversations are really kicked on. I don't think I told you this last night, but I wasn't invited to that party. Like I'm in town for a week. I don't know a lot of people in Melbourne. Yeah. So a friend of mine who, like I know the person whose party it was, but they didn't know I was in town, a week. I don't know a lot of people in Melbourne. Yeah. So a friend of mine who, like, I know the person whose party it was,

but they didn't know I was in town, so I wasn't invited. Yeah. And so I was just there at the start of the party, gate crashing, like, really early gate crashing. If you walked in with Tommy, that would have been good if you had just walked in and then just said, oh, thanks for inviting me to your party. Oh, classic Chandler.

And they would have thought you were taking my invite. No, well, that's because what happened was I turned up and I happened to just turn up at the exact same time. So it looked like you were bringing just a bunch of randoms. Yeah, which I got really paranoid about. I was like, I don't want it to look like I'm turning up with these guys. But I had an initial kind of inner turmoil because I, you know, I'm quite a big social drinker.

Some would say problem social drinker. Exactly, yeah. And so turning up, I was just kind of like, I don't know, if I'm not drinking, I don't know what I'm meant to do here. I just spent half an hour going, what the fuck do you do with these things? Waiting for Hay Day Saturday to start

because you hadn't been sober since 1988. Go watch TV in the bedroom upstairs. Yeah, I just sat by the food table for like half an hour and then I started to feel sick. And then I drank a lot of Diet Coke and then realised I'd drunk about a litre and a half and was literally shaking. Yeah, you kept coming up to me like wide and just like staring at my eyes and just being like, yeah, I've my eyes yeah like yeah i've had a great night i've had a great night because you said to me you if you are you on

something in place of alcohol i said no i've just had like a lot of sugar in the space of half an hour but then as it went on i got a bit more comfortable i kind of thought you know what maybe this is you know this is actually good i'm actually quite comfortable with being at a party and not drinking and maybe this is a good thing for me because I'm a bit guilty of, you know, being at things and getting a bit drunk and saying things and getting up in the morning and going, oh, what a dumb thing to say. Why did I say that? And as I was thinking that and then the morning I remembered

completely sober last night telling you a story which featured very, very prominent use of the phrase japs eye, a story that went for about 15 minutes and I thought, well, maybe this is just it for me. Like, it's alcohol or no alcohol. It doesn't really make any difference. You are who you are and you can't change. You've been blaming the wrong thing.

So, you know, it was kind of like a nice little lesson for me to learn there. I don't know what I can take away from that. You need to start doing dumb fuck August and just get rid of the dumb fuck. This is the sad thing. Like I saw my friend the other day and he started to ask me

what I was going to do on the weekend. He goes, oh, what are you doing over the, over the, oh,

nah, you're doing dry July so that's, doing nothing. Don't even need to bother asking you. And I was like, hey,

I, oh, nah. And then I, this was two weekends ago where I literally didn't leave the house because I just didn't

know what else to do if it's not to go and get alcohol. Yeah, it's – all my interactions with people now are over either – you have to be consuming something. Yeah. It has to be something, food or drink, but I don't think I've ever – I don't really catch up with anyone and not just hang out or something anymore. Yeah. Yeah.

Just do a podcast. Like you're drunk now at the podcast. Exactly. Yeah. Drunk and drinking a latte and a beer. He's actually still drunk from last night, McGregor. Yeah. Is there something maybe I should do?

Like, I'm not doing Dry July, but the amount of McDonald's I've had since I've come back from Thailand, is there some form of McDonald's month that I can participate in? McDonald's. It's called... It's a thing that people do called not dying before you're 40 years old that maybe you can get involved in.

You can raise some money for charity. I'll just check my calendar to find that month. Why don't you eat so much until you feel sick and you can't eat anymore ever? I tend to do that every day and then I just repeat the next day. You won't find the bottom? Yeah. Oh, man.

But it's like with Dry July, like just to put it straight, I'm not drinking for a month but I'm not doing the, you know, people like raise money and stuff. Like I'm not doing that part of it. It just seems like everything that people do, someone comes up with a name for something and then it's a thing that people just do for a little bit and then all of a sudden it has a charity aspect chained to it

where if you're not doing that, you're a prick. Like with Movember, people just used to grow moustaches for the hell of it, and now if you have a moustache, people go, are you raising money? And you go, no. They're like, you fucking piece of shit. How dare you? How dare you waste a moustache like that?

You're like, thanks for listening to my podcast. It's a very nice compliment you just gave me there, one of my catchphrases. But yeah, I feel like last night was a big hurdle for you. And you were sort of like my AA kind of sober companion. Your sponsor. Yeah, because you don't really drink. Yeah, I don't really drink.

And I found myself, you and I would kind of meet up every half an hour during the party and report back to each other. You'd give me a half hour chip. Which was an actual chip since it was a party. There was some dips. There were dips as well. Yeah, no, I had a great time. I feel like we really brushed over

how drunk McGregor was last night, though. You were pretty, yeah, when you turned up, you were pretty drunk. I hadn't drunk in a long time because I had a throat infection for a couple of weeks. And so that was the first time I I had a throat infection for a couple of weeks and so I that was the first time I'd been back on alcohol for a while it was, I felt

very bad this morning but I did lose my glasses so not all not the waist Did you actually lose them because someone told me who you'd come from a gig with that you were in a cab with them and you thought you'd lost them for 15 minutes told me who you'd come from a gig with that you were in a cab with them

and you thought you'd lost them for 15 minutes. You were freaking out when they were actually just sitting on your face the whole time. They were on the... For some reason, I'd taken... When I was in the cab, I thought it would be a good idea because I wasn't sitting very comfortable to take everything out of my pocket and put it on the seat.

And I reckon the glasses got stuck. I looked in the house, I couldn't find them. I reckon they were on the seat. And I reckon the glasses got stuck. I looked in the house, I couldn't find them. I reckon they're in the cab. I reckon the cabbie's wondering... Wearing them. Wearing them, picking up heaps of chicks. Seeing shit like nobody's business. Finding locations so much earlier.

Seeing jokes everywhere. Chucked his GPS out the window. Seeing jokes everywhere. You've got special Terminator-style glasses that, like, in your vision you see a bike and it's like, bikes, what's up with them? Girls ride them sometimes. How bad are your eyes, Luke?

They're pretty bad. I can't, like, everyone's got that Young and the Restless. I remember I got contacts once. Let's's got that Young and the Restless. I remember I got contacts once. Hey, let's go back to Young and the Restless. What are you talking about? Isn't that Young and the Restless glow? Do you keep seeing Sans go through hourglasses everywhere you look? You know when everyone's got that glow on the TV, on those soaps?

They've got that sort of glow. Like a soft focus. I remember when I first got Contex For the first time And I put him in and I'm like Wow you're pretty ugly Who were you saying that to? You're just getting a tub of Vaseline

And just smearing it over your eyeballs I thought you meant you were in the doctor's office They put Contex in for you And then you immediately slayed to them If you had come around that day I thought you were in the doctor's office they put content tags in for you and then you immediately slayed to them if you would come around that day I thought you were a hot doctor

I put I put paw paw on all the mirrors and just cried it was it was confronting because I'd never actually seen my face

in full focus I wasn't ready no one told me that's what it would be like oh man so the glasses are gone they're gone I'll have to buy a new pair

so I'll go to a pair tomorrow a little inside and out you guys are free you should come round go to a pair I um here's uh going back to McDonald's

I uh I have been... Are we going there after this? I've been there already today. Oh, God. Why do you... I'm just like, what is it about it that you... Do you...

Is it the convenience? Yes. Or do you just love it? Because there's other things that are as convenient. Is there one right next to your house or something? There's one near. There's a couple near my house. They've moved there since I found out I live there.

But yeah. Sorry? You haven't had one today? Gee whiz. This, no. You know what? No. I haven't this week.

But I've had it, I've probably had it three times this week. And do you, like, do you really like it that much? Because every time I go there with you, you seem to have to go through this process with your burger where you have to pick out the pickles and then you have to use the thing that it's been wrapped in to wipe the tomato sauce off it. It just seems like you can go somewhere else and just get something that just has ingredients in it that you like. Yes.

That you don't need to then do this to. It just seems like it's a sheer inconvenience for you. It's like an alcoholic though saying, yeah, look, I literally don't need that booze. Like, I shouldn't have it. I shouldn't have it. Wait, are you claiming some sort of chemical addiction to McDonald's? Maybe. That's realism.

People get addicted to junk food. Yeah. I find it really hard to give up chips, like just packets of fins and stuff. Really? I buy them and then I just eat so much chips. I've got to stop it. I've gone in pretty deep on coffee.

I used to not drink it and then I wanted to stop drinking Coke. So I started drinking coffee and now my average would be three or four a day. That's not good. I've never drunk coffee. It's always an interesting reaction when someone finds that out because they just have that real, like, it's like, you know, someone saying to me, well, why are you eating McDonald's all the time? But someone goes, how can you have not ever drunk coffee?

Like, what's wrong with you? I was like that for a long time. No, the question's the other way around. Like, there's something wrong with you if you drink it all the time. Yeah, yeah. Because with me, the big thing that got me off it was I, like, when I moved to this side of town, a lot of cafes around here because they're trying to be really trendy and environmental or whatever,

they just don't have Coke products at all. So if I go and meet up with people, it's like, well, if I want to drink anything, I better just start drinking coffee. So there you go. Do you feel noticeably healthier when you stopped Coke? Oh, big time, yeah. Yeah. I actually had like – because I would – again, I would have maybe like, like three cans or

bottles of Coke a day. I would drink a lot. I would get up when we worked together on TVs, the white room, Carl, you were fascinated by where I'd start my morning off with a nice old cold can of Coke at 10, 10 in the morning. Yeah. So Tommy was last night's leader and a half of Diet Coke something you made up? Reminded me of the good old times. Took me back.

Coincidentally, last night the White Room wasn't on TV either, so that really did bring you back. Coincidentally, I haven't slept. What was the concept of that show? Was it a game show? There's a room. Yeah. And it's painted white.

The initial concept was to get audience members, but they ditched that very early on. I was saying this to someone the other day, because we do talk about the white room on this podcast a lot. I like to think it's achieved a certain level of infamy based just on the mentions that it receives on this show. I really want to set up, maybe as some kind of dum-dum club event, a white room reunion show Because I think based just on

Based just on who was on that show I reckon if you put together a gig with all those people on it You would sell that gig out But 95% of the people there Would have no idea What this was a reunion gig for Which I really like the idea of that happening Yeah, for sure.

You could actually, because it was all using found footage from TV, you could just use clips from the old white room on this show, on the reunion show. So two things about McDonald's. There's going to be more than two. We all know there'll be more than two. Two things are I love it and I can't do without it.

Anyway, so moving on. This is what I saw this week on one of my sojourns to McDonald's. Someone in front of me walked in and just bought three bottles of water. From McDonald's? At McDonald's. That's weird. Someone lined up. Is it a cheaper bottle of water at McDonald's?

I don't know. But I was like, wow, you are really using McDonald's wrong. All right. I can't quite decide. Maybe he's like you and goes, you know what? I'm just going to get three bottles of water and not buy junk food. Yeah. I just need to be there.

I just need to come in and smell it. Yeah, because it's such a pleasant atmosphere at McDonald's. That's why people want to be there. What McDonald's is, is this the one on Glenferry Road? No. Are there other immediately available shops? Yes, there's another one I go to. There's another McDonald's I go to, which is in Bridge Road.

If I actually want to feel a little bit good about going to McDonald's, I'll go to the Bridge Road one because I'll walk there. Yeah. And it's quite a walk. And it's a bit of a fancy. It's got that nice little outdoor area. Yes. So it feels like a kind of Parisian alfresco.

I can sit there, I can read the newspaper. With it smeared bit of a fancy, it's got that nice little outdoor area, so it feels like a kind of Parisian alfresco. I can sit there, I can read the newspaper, I can... With it smeared in pickles and sauce, yeah. What was your second thing at McDonald's, and does it top the three-bottle story? No, you don't lead with your best story, you know. No, I...

Oh, coincidentally and also, I... Coincidentally and also? I... Coincidentally and also? Yes. That's a good answer. No, but very quickly, I did put this up on Twitter this week, but I went to Nando's and I went to buy chocolate mousse,

which I've mentioned in previous episodes. And someone... It was like a cartoon. Someone walked in front of me, just got in front of me in line, bought all the mousses that were left in the shop. Three for himself and then just walked out. And I went, can I have a mousse?

And they're like, we just sold them all to that man and pointed at the guy walking out. Did you run after him and try and buy one off him? Like a scalper? No, I was mad, but then I was like... Follow that car. You know, I was like, man, I wish I'd thought of that idea, buying three mousses in a row, like at one time.

Like, that's a great idea. I shouldn't knock him. My mate used to buy Hungry Jack's burgers, the Junior Burger, whatever they're called, and he used to freeze them. He used to put them in the freezer. What? He'd buy like

ten and he'd put some in the fridge and he'd put the rest in the freezer and then he'd microwave when he wanted them. It was the worst. Is this for those inconvenient times when you really want fast food but you don't have any access to it? Those times like never. Yeah, and he'd never

eat veggies and he's still alive. He's a healthy guy. Was your friend under house arrest? Is that why? Yeah. He just loved burgers. He loves junk food and that's all he eats but he's not that unhealthy. He does a lot of – he does just enough fitness to sort of cancel out if that's possible.

Yeah. But, yeah, he used to – he goes, you want a burger? And I'm like, sure. And I'm thinking he – but I get this microwave. That's crazy. Because it's not good food. And, like, the only good point is when it's quite fresh. So by taking the freshness away, there is absolutely no redeeming.

I'm almost tempted to do it just to see what it tastes like. I'm surprised you didn't get salmonella or food poisoning or something. Yeah. My friend, another friend, in high school, he used to bring a whole chicken for lunch. A whole chicken? And he used to put it in the school microwave, but not on a plate or anything.

He would just put it in the microwave, like not an exposed chicken, not one wrapped or anything. He'd just put it in the microwave and then just take it out of the microwave and eat it. Everyone used to hate it because you had all this splattered chicken all over the microwave. It was gross. Was this like a rotisserie chicken or was it like a raw chicken that you just put in the microwave?

It takes the whole lunchtime to cook. I think he used to boil them or whatever because it was the most healthy option or something, he said. That's the most healthy way of eating a full whole chicken. Just whack it in the microwave. He's never got food poisoning. Because I'm a bit of a germaphobe, so I wash my hands before I eat. But to actually just watch him pick it up

out of this plastic bag and put it in the microwave, just slap it on, take it out. I'm just fascinated by the fact that you had a school microwave. Yeah, we had. We had one in the Rickman School. Yeah. Harvard. Harvard. so that's why everyone's trying to

get into Harvard because of its microwave you've got to study you've got to get good grades to use that they didn't

answer anything all of a sudden this microwave appeared in the in the rec room and it's just like what are you doing so of course we

started microwaving everything I don't know what they were thinking. It didn't last for... It lasted about two weeks. So between raw chicken and whatever we could make it to spark. Yeah. That's still ten chickens.

What was he doing after the microwave? Like how was he eating his chicken after that? He'd just sort of put it... He'd get a cardboard plate, which he decides to get out after. Because he could have put it on the cardboard plate and then microwaved it. I'm sure someone sold him that at some point. He goes, yeah. But then he'd just eat the chicken with his hands.

He'd just sit there eating his whole chicken. Did you have a tuck shop at your school? Was it a good tuck shop? The lady used to hate me because I always liked to pick which muffin I wanted. Because I'm buying and I want to pick which one. Oh, man, I was the same, yeah. They're all the same.

I'm like, no, they're not. That one's bigger. And I want that one. She goes, well, I'm just going to grab the one that's closest to me. I'm like, well, I don't want to buy it. She's like, well, you have to buy it. That's great. I've always wanted to do that.

I hate that. I'm like, no, I don't want to buy it. She's like, well, you have to buy it. That's great. I've always wanted to do that. I hate that. I'm like, no, no, I want that muffin. Yeah. We had this like brand of like little pizzas in packets. And some of them would be like they do a ham and cheese one. And some of them were awesome and they'd have ham and cheese like right to the edges. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But then those ones would be kind of maybe about 15% of the batch.

And the rest would just be shit-ass. Like the cheese would just end halfway. And it was the same thing. It was a constant battle. Like you'd get some tuck shop ladies that got it and would kind of go along with your thing and go, oh, okay, this big cheesy one here. And then other ones would just hand you the shit one and you'd go,

no, that's not worthy of my $2.20, please. But that's a good point. Like you're paying for it. It's always that thing you're in the hands of the gods. Like when I'm buying bacon at the deli, it's like, oh, gee, if only she had picked a good one. You're never at a deli. A deli at Coles?

Is there another sort? When you ask the lady at McDonald's to put bacon on your burger. I want that Coke. No, not that one. Run the jet out for a little bit and then put my cup under there. Put that lid on it. Not that lid. That's too big.

That's an extra large. I'm getting a large. So who's working in the kitchen today? It's you? Got any specials on today? What are the fries like today? When does Sam start? Is he on the phone?

So what's this? So yeah, so last night I went to McDonald's and there was someone in front of me in line and it was like a dad and he brought like three kids. He had three kids and they were all aged like from two to four and he was like a 45-year-old guy or something. And like the four-year-old pointed at the special that's on at McDonald's at the moment, the wedges, and went, Daddy, can I get wedges? And the dad goes, right, well, that's interesting.

See, I've got a view about this, right? Hear me out. This is what he's saying to a four-year-old. Hear me out. Yeah, yeah. Hear me out. He goes, listen, I've got a view. I've got-year-old. Hear me out. Yeah, yeah. Hear me out. He goes, listen, I've got a view about this. Hear me out.

Wedges aren't as good as chips. So there you go. And that was it. He said this to his kid. Yeah, he said this to his kid, to his four-year-old kid. And he goes, they're not as good as chips. So there you go. And then the kid goes, can I get the wedges?

And he goes, yes. And then they got it. This is the worst dad of all time. That's a horrible dad. Indicative of a man who's just kind of ignored a lot throughout the rest of his life. But who says I have a view to his four-year-old? Who says hear me out to a four-year-old? Yeah, yeah.

Hear me out this time. Yeah, yeah. Let me finish. Yeah, don't keep shutting me down like you did when you were three. Alright?

Well, clearly the four-year-old's in control, right? Because the four-year-old gets the wedges. Yeah. So, you know, it's not like

he's justified in pleading with the four-year-old like trying to switch his mind on me. Well, almost like you don't need to prefix it with

I have a view about this. You just say, hey, wedges, arms, good ships. This is a sad old man who's had a kid. His life has just shut down. He doesn't see any of his friends anymore. He gets no

social time. There's no avenue for him to put his views out there. I felt like there was some sort of time warp where I was seeing into my future, and that was me with three children explaining and just showing them what the rest of life is going to be like, explaining to them the menu at McDonald's. I'm fascinated by Maccas all of a sudden having wedges and going, fucking look at us, guys.

We've done it. Hey, good on us. We've finally gotten wedges. It's a thing that has existed at every pub and cafe for over 20 years. At the worst pubs and cafes. At the worst pubs and cafes, yeah. It's such a weird thing for them to all of a sudden get on. And they're so proud of themselves for having wedges.

They should introduce us a new product, Flat Coke, just like worse products than they already have. I've got a view about Flat Coke. Because that would have employed an advertising agency. The advertising agency would have employed a bunch of people to film stuff. Yeah, I like that they would have... They bunch of people to film stuff. Yeah. Yeah. Guys. Yeah. I like that they would have. They got a photographer, a professional photographer in to try and make wedges not look like shit.

Yeah, exactly. You're going to need Annie Leibovitz or something in there to make that happen. See, I'm more of a, I haven't had the Macca's wedges yet, but I'm, in general, I'm more of a fan of your wedge than your thin style of fry. I like something thick. I like a big... I haven't had just a dollar's worth of chips for ages. You know when you get a flake of chips and you get it in a big bag? Yeah, minimum chips.

I love that. Yeah, that is good. Anyone sell that? I do, yeah. Does anyone sell chips? I love that at the fish and chip place, how there's not the different size cups or packets to put your chips in. It's just, here's what you've got on a bit of paper, and then we'll just dump chips on it until the bag doesn't close up.

And that's how much you're getting. That is a great, we need that in more avenues of food, I reckon. Minimum fried noodles, you know. We need a bit of that. Now, Luke, you've, since I think, since we've, we haven't had you in for a studio ep, let's call it that, a studio episode in quite a while. We've had you on live ones or whatever. So you've sort of got a lot of work on, like all of a sudden, you know, obviously a lot of studio TV execs have been listening to Little Dumb Dumb Club. Have discovered you and just been editing out any time when me or Tommy talk.

Yeah. And just discovered you. Blacklisted us. Yeah. Just, so you've been doing heaps of stuff lately. So like Tommy said, you've been on Dirty Laundry Live. I watched an episode accidentally of The Time of Our Lives on ABC the other day. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Which you made an appearance in. Played a comedian who got bumped. Yeah. Well, the episode I watched, I was sort of like a bit, there was a scene where people were putting up posters, and I sort of tuned in within a couple of minutes, and it's like Stephen Curry and, what's his name, Kenny? That's right, Shane Jacobson. Shane Jacobson. Were walking around and sticking up posters of your face. That's right.

Saying, you know, come here Wednesday, 8 o'clock, whatever, and they're doing, me and my girlfriend watching and laughing and going, oh, that's funny, they're putting up McGregor, but then it cut to the actual gig, and the dialogue was something like, like you coming up and going, oh, so, can I get on tonight, or whatever, I'm like, you've already been advertised, McGregor, like, how's that work? You're, no, sorry, mate, we're full, we're full of this gig with your face 60 foot tall on the front of it, yeah, sorry, mate. You know when Husey rocks up at the comedy festival and goes, is it cool if I just do 20 nights of an hour in this 1500 feet up?

When Hughsey rocks up to McGregor's solo show and goes, can I just do 55? There was a scene before that that would have made that all make sense. Right. I'm glad I didn't do that because it wouldn't have been funny. I just like that you said... That was the thing that I it wouldn't have been funny. I just like that you said... No, it wasn't the thing that I just said then.

Factual. I just like that you said you accidentally watched it. What did you, trip and fall on the remote? Yes. How do you accidentally watch a show? Well, I... Your girlfriend made you watch it, is what you're trying to say. You're embarrassed that you sat around watching a drama.

No, no. I think I more watched it because we were just flinging around. I don't usually watch a lot of TV at night. I think that's the accident. So we're flinging around and then McGregor turns up. I just love seeing that. So I thought I'd watch the rest of it. Now, the thing that intrigued me about it is because the main character is like a stand-up

and he runs his own room and stuff like that. To be completely honest, when this show started, the makers of the show got me in to talk to them quite a few times about what it's like to be a comic and run your own room and they sort of got me to give a lot of advice about how realistic this thing would be. What if this happened? What would you react like or how does this work with the running of a room or whatever? So I gave them a lot of info and then i'm watching it and seeing people like using the advice that i'd given and gone oh this is this is kind of funny and then at the end i'd been credited as like a consultant and i was like

that's pretty funny but then my mum rang me straight afterwards to go oh did you i don't suppose you were watching the show but you were just used as a your name was used as a consultant on the end of the show. And I was like, yeah, you're right. That's such a weird coincidence because I don't usually watch your show. And that you saw the show as well. And I said, why were you watching this show? And she goes, because your brother's going to be on it.

Yeah? Really? I'm like, what? Because with this show, they'd got me in to be a consultant just for a couple of hours one day. And I said, hey, if you ever need someone to audition to be in the show, to write for it or whatever, I'm very keen to put my hand up. Basically, your lead character is based on me. And what he'd be saying is stuff that I've just told you.

So if you need someone to be in, yeah, no worries, no worries. Anyway, apparently my brother is getting more hours on TV than I am. He might be on it, though. He might have been a consultant. He might have been consulting them about how much of a prick you are when they have to deal with you. How much to listen to me. Consultancy consultant is what his title was.

Is he an actor? No, no. I've got no idea what's going on. Wow. He couldn't be, maybe he's like an extra or something, but I don't know.

I didn't really Because he was sizzling up that he'd auditioned for the Mole. Yes. And that hasn't happened. Yeah, so there's all this sort of stuff

where, well, not yet anyway. Yeah, so he might be appearing. I'm going to have to start watching it every week. Well, maybe you've

already worked with him. Yeah, and we're doing a spin-off series. The time of our lives. The time of our lives. and everyone well maybe you've already worked with him yeah and we're doing a spin off series the time of our lives time of our lives two best friends oh that's funny

well at least you know you won't have to just you know how did you get that is a good thing to bring up around the Christmas dinner table

yeah yeah that'll get through some awkward silences at least yeah I'm not sure in my consultancy maybe I mentioned how good my brother was at acting or something.

Maybe that came through somehow. Does he have a very similar name to you? He's got a similar last name. Oh, yeah? That's interesting. What kind of question is that? Because if your name's like Carl... If it is, hypothetically.

And his name was like Cart. Belvedere. For example. It is actually quite similar, to be honest. It is similar, yeah. It's my hope that eventually all of your family except you is on Tom and Bill. Just everyone except me is on TV. If I'm going to show up, I'm going to put everyone in all of your family except you is on Tom and Bill. It's just that everyone except me is on TV. If I'm ever going to show up,

I'm going to put everyone in an old movie film except you. And cast you as me. Who could play Carl Will? I'll do it. Yeah, I'll do it. It's probably easiest. No, I'll write you in the show, but I'll just play you with a wig or something.

We talked a little bit last week about our recent holidays to Thailand. Now, you guys, all three of you guys, when you go away, you read it? You take books with you? You have a bit of a catch-up on some literature? Yeah, I've recently invested in a Kindle, and it's been fantastic. Yeah, I read a lot. A lot of product placement in this podcast isn't it

yeah so take your Kindle down to Maccas and have a good old time click on the telly in there and watch the time of our lives

and then drink a six pack you fuckhead your dog's your dog's hitting me here yeah he's I don't know what's going on this is kind of what we in this house refer to

as the witching hour he kind of goes a little bit crazy around this time but he's okay he's, I don't know what's going on. This is kind of what we in this house refer to as the witching hour. He kind of goes a little bit crazy around this time, but he's okay. He's just happy to have friends around. Shout out to all the dog lovers out there listening. But yeah, Chandler, when you went to Thailand, did you take books with you?

I did. I read three books. I read Product Placement right now. I read Keith Richards' autobiography. I read Chris Farley's biography. I read Sarah Silver' autobiography. I read Chris Farley's biography. I read Sarah Silverman's autobiography. A lot of biogs, yeah. Just on your Amazon wish list if people want to give you anything. So how much they care.

Well, I don't want them. I've already read them. Yeah, but you've just got – your biographies are just the only thing. Oh, right. Yeah, yeah. I read biographies and also rock stars. Yeah. If someone else wants to put those on their wish list,

I can give them to you because I've read them now. Awesome, great. Well, because we, so, yeah, I had a similar thing. I read, I reread The War for Late Night by Bill Carter about the Conan O'Brien, Jay Leno, great book. I also read The Brief and Wondrous Life of Oscar Wilde by Junot Diaz, another great book, great little story. My girlfriend took over a book called My Stolen Life by J.C. Dugard.

I don't know if you guys are familiar with what that is, but that's a memoir by a young girl who was abducted when she was about six, kept in a man's secret backyard, repeatedly raped, and gave birth to a bunch of his children and was in there for about 15 years. That's a nice little poolside read, isn't it? Yeah, that's just her on the beach just reading about the brutal rape of a child. Very questionable choice for holiday reading, I thought. To be fair, is that required reading in Thailand schools?

Just next time I go on holiday, I'm going to be kicking back on the beach with a copy of Mein Kampf. Just really getting loose. I remember we talked about this, I think on the first podcast I did with you guys, but did you end up ever getting a horror book? I remember we were talking about a horror book. A horror comic?

It was a horror comic. I bought that, yeah. Did you end up, and I was telling you how, I can't remember what I was talking about now but let's all listen to it right now

have you read have you read a scary book before no you know what I was actually thinking today I was watching something on TV where someone was reading a Stephen King book

and I've always wanted to get into Stephen King it's a great place to start Stephen King yeah it's such a scary I couldn't I was actually

I was I was like 20 can't remember how old I was but it it was – but I would read it. I couldn't read it at night by myself. I had to read it during the day. I used to read it. I usually read it with someone else. Did you have to get your mum to read it to you?

Yeah. I had to. She had a flu. Mum, I'm flying over. I just want to sit by the bed. I used to read, like, Goosebumps books and stuff when I was a kid. And then I remember, like, when you get a bit old and you realise This isn't really scary

This is just sort of comical And then you start looking in the Not just the kids, the young adult section of the bookstore The actual adult And you're reading it and you're like Oh man, I'm so grown up now I remember reading a bit of teenage books Where people were going through changes

And going, oh no, I don't know about this Horrifying Just on like There were Stephen King books as well of teenage books where people were going through changes and going, oh, no, I don't know about this. That's horrifying. Just on like... There were Stephen King books as well, which is weird. There was Pennywise going through changes. The puberty. Christine went through puberty as well. Just you saying that now, sitting there with that big beard going,

I'm in the bookshop the other day reading a teen book about them going through changes, and I was like, oh. Just on sort of inappropriate books, every year for Christmas I kind of buy my mum like a novel or a book for her to read, you know. And I've been putting consistently less and less effort into these since about 15, right? Love you, Mum.

Love you, Mum. And so a couple of years ago when those like Stig Larsson, those like Girl with the Dragon Tattoo books came out, I was like, oh, they seem like they're popular. I'll get one of them, Mum. And so a couple of years ago when those Stig Larson, those Girl with the Dragon tattoo books came out, I was like, oh, they seem like they're popular. I'll get one of them for Mum. Can I just very quickly say, any time someone brings up Stig Larson, my instant thing is I think it's the guy from Top Gear.

I cannot get that out of my head. Because I was thinking, how funny is this story going to be? He's buying fucking Top Gear books for his mum. This is awesome. This is his well-renowned book about this guy that raped all the cars that he drove. The cars have these crazy revenge fantasies. That's why no one ever caught him, because he's always wearing that big helmet. Yeah.

That famous book, The Girl with the Car in a Rape Dungeon. That was just the train was going along the tracks and there's nothing coming up. So yeah, I just kind of saw a bunch of them on the bestseller list. When you go to the bookshop and there's just that wall of bestseller books. So I picked up like three of them, I think, for my mum. I was like, oh, she'll like these. Not realising what they're about, the subject matter.

I kind of wrapped them up. Merry Christmas, mum. And then like about two months later, I get a phone call from my mum. I finally finished those books you gave me, Michael. They were pretty upsetting. Thanks for the present. Wow. That's amazing.

I haven't decided who yet or which friend, but I think it would be funny to buy the same gift every year for just one of your friends. And every birthday, give them the same gift. The exact same. Yeah, and it's always a copy of The Lion King 3. Well, we used to have, at a workplace that I was at, they used to have like a Kris Kringle

and a deal where you, is it a Kris Kringle where, this was the setup. Everyone bought a present and then put it on a table and then everyone would get a number and then you'd be called up one by one and whatever and number one,

you'd come up and you'd get to pick a present or whatever and then you'd unwrap it one by one and whatever. And number one, you'd come up and you'd get to pick a present or whatever. And then you'd unwrap it and it was like a DVD of Lion King 3. And you'd go, okay. And then number two would come up. And if they got a worse present than that, you had the ability to swap it with someone who'd been before you. I don't know if you call that Chris. It's kind of a version of Chris Kringle.

It was quite good. Chris Kringle is more like you get a name at random and you're picking for that person, but then they don't know what you... Well, I'm not sure if there's a name for that. In your scenario, if you got number 15, or the last number, you can pick any present you want.

Yes. That's awesome. But if you get 99, if you get number one and you get a car, you're not hanging on to that car. No. Unless you immediately go and take a shit in it. Yeah.

No one else is going to want it. Yeah, unless you rape it like the Stig always used to in those books. But that was literally, that would be like someone would be number 14 and they'd get a six-pack, and that was extreme. People were just going, well, forget that one. Whoever's got 99, they are getting that. So they would get the six-pack at number 16 and then just go, well, I'm just going to drink one of them because it's not going to be here

for very long. It's value going to last. It's going to value. Yeah. I don't know if I've ever told this on the show, but quickly, Luke, you and I were at a Christmas party once at a friend of the show, Kate McLennan's house, where they did Kris Kringle, and they were all going around, and it was mostly people had gone out, because it was like a $5 or $10 limit, just people just trying to get the shittest gifts that

they could. And my girlfriend was there, and she opened a gift that had come from Ann Edmonds that was a really nice, like, a thing of tea and some bath salts. And the whole night has been, ah, a fucking robot, you know, a mechanical chicken, ah, a good one, dickhead. And my girlfriend opens this really nice package and goes, oh, this is great, this is really, oh, I love, you know, I really like this flavour of tea and these bath salts would be really nice.

Thanks, Anne. Thanks so much. And Anne just goes, oh, I'm bad at comedy. Just thinking it had to be just something good. This bastardised version of Kris Kringle. So what would happen every year was one guy once got like a, ended up with like a ship and they just put it in their office.

This big model of a ship. Yeah. And then everyone just went ah, he got a ship. And then the next year someone just on purpose bought a ship to make sure he got it. When I was working, when I left that workplace, he had eight ships.

Those deliberately rigged it every year. And When I left that workplace, he had eight ships. That's so good. They just deliberately rigged it every year. And the funny thing is, because it's obviously a joke on him, and he just ends up with all his ships, and how can you be happy with that? But someone also gave him a sea captain hat once. I was going to say someone should have done that. It's a nautical theme.

And I stole the hat. And then as weeks went on, he was like, oh, who pinched my fucking hand? I'm like, oh, I didn't know you. Did you do a gig in that hat once? Yes. You had your profile picture with you on stage wearing a sailor's hat.

Yes, I took it. And then he got upset about that someone had taken it. I'm like, I didn't know this was something you liked. I thought this is a joke. You just get filled with rubbish. Your desk is full of shit that you don't like. That's the joke. I can take this, can't I?

I never owned up, so I'm sorry. Carl, you never pinch a man's sailor's hat. That's office etiquette number one. Did you see that article about the teacher who wore the same outfit every school photo for like 40 years or something? It's really funny. He had this beige 70s jumper, but then he's all the e-book photos, he's wearing the exact

same thing. Great. I love it. That's so good. It's better as a verbal than it is to see the photos. It's kind of into the pictures, yeah. On the kind of presence and Kris Kringle thing, we do like an annual Kris Kringle in my sort of friendship circle up in Sydney

and we've got this one guy who throughout the year will just kind of collect, you know how just sometimes at the end of the year, I guess the end of the year you're like, oh I borrowed a DVD off Carl and I got a CD off Tommy and I haven't given them back yet, right? So he'll just wrap all them up into a bar and then just give them into

the Chris Kringle. So if you get that it's your job to like, you've got to end up giving Carl back his fucking DVD. You've got to work out who they belong to. Or,

you've got to keep shit and then have people go, hey, I know you got that as a present, but that's actually mine. Can I have that back? Yeah.

It's like the most awkward, like, fuck it. I like how this guy's just getting away with this year after year. and like, he keeps thinking,

it's like, oh, this is a funny thing I'm doing. I was like, the fucking worst. Yeah. I can't, like, not invite him because he's part of the, anyway, if you're listening, and like, he keeps thinking, it's like, oh, this is a funny thing I'm doing. I was like, the fucking worst. Yeah. I can't invite him because he's part of the,

anyway, if you're listening, fuck off. It feels like he should be giving his marching orders from that friendship group. I remember getting

to an age at Christmas where I would buy presents for my family, especially for my brother where I'd be, you know, you want to put something under the tree

that they're not going to be able to guess, so if you've got him a book, you don't want to make it look like a book so say I'd gotten him a book or something and I just built this elaborate thing where it was like this massive box

it was filled with marbles there was like a weird bit to it there was all this stuff going on a contract with the ABC yeah an IMDB page all this sort of stuff to distract him from the fact that it was a book and then he was like oh I've got no idea

what this is going to be and then on Christmas Day he opens it up all this other stuff's in it and then there's just like a book in here and he's like awesome look at all the stuff

in here there's marbles there's something and I'm like no no no that's not yours that's mine that's

you don't get to keep that that's just the distracting bit I want all that stuff back he's like no that's all better than the present you got me

oh fuck Christmases and birthdays and like unwrapping presents at our house was always such a pain in the ass because my dad always wanted to keep the wrapping paper pristine so he could reuse it. So Christmas morning, you see a big box that's clearly like a Nintendo 64 or whatever that you just want to go. It would take like 15 minutes to open it because he'd be there

just making sure the sticky tape didn't pull off any of the, just kind of guiding it gently with a knife and then folding it all up. What a tight ass. It costs like 80 cents there. It is such a weird. Nintendo 64. Well, yeah. Spent a lot of money on that gaming console.

Didn't have a lot left over from wrapping paper Yeah he's made a deal with Target Where if he brings them in enough Wrapping paper They'll just do him a deal on trading him a 64 Yeah Do you ever go to shopping centres where they do the free Wrapping paper around Christmas and stuff

Have you seen those? Yeah I live in the house Maybe I've been to a shopping centre I've been to a shopping centre. Go on. You've been out. I've been alive in December. You guys know wrapping paper?

I've never seen it personally, but I'm aware of it as a concept. I've seen some of Mr. Daslow's. Yeah, his family's big on it. But you can go there, obviously,

you dump all your shit and they just wrap it and stuff. I remember once I was in a line, I had, like, a fucking book for my girlfriend or something, and I was like, just get this done and then get out of here. I was like, because I'm shit at presents, I don't buy a lot, you know, I buy, like, three presents every year because I'm terrible. What a scrooge.

But this woman in front of me had a trolley, like, full of shit, like, she had, like, 40 things in it, and they had, like like three little people dressed as elves like doing all the rapping and she commandeered all of them and kept giving them all like 10 things to rap yeah and it's christmas so there's not going to be a thing up going maximum yeah exactly so she's got like in the spirit of things and the line behind her was like you know it got it got to be like 30 people? And eventually I thought this is my big moment. Like, I'm going to go up and say something to her and just be like,

hey, listen, there's a big line. You know, you've obviously got a lot of shit. You're just taking it up. You know, why don't you just let everyone go through? Like, just free up one of the elves. You can still keep the others. Yeah, yeah. Just because, you know, it's an express lane, right?

And so if you could just free up one of the elves. She's just grabbing other little people that she sees walking around the shopping centre and getting them to work for her. And so, because I'm next in line, I go, and I'm like, fucking yeah. And this is like a big thing in my life. I always try, because I'm always like such a fucking pushover. I just want to be a little bit assertive. So I kind of went up to her and I was like, excuse me.

And I probably oversold it a bit, probably came off a bit aggressive. Like, look, there's a big line back there and I'd really appreciate it if you just, you know, let some of us, because we've been waiting for a long time and I'm just garbling on my words. And then she goes, oh, I'm really sorry. And it turns out she was wrapping presents for the children's hospital.

And I've just gone, yeah, well, yeah. Oh, gosh, go back into the line then, I reckon. That's beautiful. And you did mention that she was a sick kid as well. Did I say woman? I meant child in a wheelchair who I just went and stood over and yelled at. Did I say yelled? I meant bashed.

Just with a bar, just with a steel bar. You don't need to wrap that teddy bear and that bike and that IV drip. It wasn't at a shopping centre. I was actually at a kindergarten that I broke it into. Hospital, yeah. And she was a doctor who I'd just beaten up and then it was awful. Man, that's a bad story in hindsight. That's terrible.

Actually, that's very dark. Well, from all of us here at the Little Dum Dum Club, Merry Christmas to you and yours. Guys, that is all the time we have for today on the Little Dum Dum Club. Michael Hing, Luke McGregor, thanks very much for joining us. Thanks for having us. Have you got things you would like to plug? Hey, yeah, I don't know when this goes up,

but if you're listening to this and you're in Sydney, during the month of August, I'll be at the Comedy Store a bunch. And also, I'll be up at Splendour if you want to come and see me do some comedy up there. Cool. If you've got any presents that need wrapping, bring them up to Michael. Yeah, I've got some sins to... Help you out?

Yep. Luke McGregor, you're about to go overseas. You're going to be in London at the Soho Theatre. Yeah. We have a few UK friends of the show that I'm sure will be excited to come and check you out. I was looking at the stats again last night on the fan page on

Facebook and seeing that there was like you know I think maybe nearly triple figures in England and stuff. And you know one in Malaysia and one in

Kuwait and one in all that stuff again. It was awesome. Well Luke's not doing shows in Kuwait yet but let's hold off on the plug for that. Well there's going to

be one bloke there. But yeah I think what is it sohotheatre.co.uk or something? It has all the details. What are the dates?

Start of August? It starts August till the 17th, I think. Yeah, cool. So go check McGregor out. Should double check

that. Just check Luke's Twitter page. He's always plugging stuff on there. So just get on there. What have we got? We've got t-shirts.

We're sending out badges with our t-shirts now. Yes, badges. I just sent out my first one today. Excellent. Some lucky man has got himself a large Navy Haymates t-shirt with some free badges. How many have you got left? I think about 30. 30?

Yeah. Getting through them. Check out the wedges at McDonald's. Yeah. Check out me at McDonald's. Yep. The Stiggs book, the girl with the wedges at McDonald's. Check out me at McDonald's. The Stiggs book, the girl with the

dragon tattoo. Nabil or whatever we came up with. Don't sell the rest of the t-shirts and let's just wear them all like we're all 30.

Just have them on. Guys, thanks very much for listening and we will see you next time. See you, mates. We all did it. We all did it.