The Little Dum Dum Club with Tommy & Karl - Episode 67 - Sammy J

Episode Date: January 10, 2012

Dum Dum Landfill, Hey Hey and The Lord of Pranks. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hey mates, welcome into the Little Dumb Dumb Club for another week. My name is Tommy Dasolo. Sitting opposite me, the other half of the club, Carl Chandler. G'day dickhead. We are back, second episode of 2012. Just as the Mayans predicted, we have t-shirts for sale literally flying off the shelf. They are. By shelf, I mean the boot of Carl's car moving pretty quickly.

The more you can buy, the more it will help out because they're stuck in the doorway of my house at the moment. It is a pretty sad sight to walk into your house and just see this mountain. Massive stack of grey T-shirts and a few navy ones. this mountain. Massive stack of grey t-shirts and a few navy ones. I will say, we discussed this last week, that the greys weren't really shifting because they were the ones that I wanted and the blues were selling better. As of last week's episode, more greys have been sold.

More greys have been sold. And by more you mean what? Some. Yes, no. There's been a couple of requests. I don't know if it's pity out of the appalling treatment that I suffered at the hands of my so-called friends in last week's episode. But at this point, I'll take what I can get.

So if you do want one, littledumbdumbclub at gmail.com and we'll sort that out. A few people, it's been cool. People have gotten them and they've sent us pictures of them wearing them. There's been a rush this week. It's exciting. It's really cool. And, Wills, we haven't mentioned this for a while, but we both have, I have a CD of Stand Up that I can sell you as well if you'd like one. You can also get it on iTunes, but if you want a physical one,

we can send you. There's also the Funny Buggers book that one Carl Chandler edited that's got heaps of old mates of the show in it. Yep, pretty much all of them. Yeah, exclusively old mates of the show. So, yeah, send us an email, littledumbdumbclub at gmail.com. It's a fair, it's a bit of a backyard operation at the moment. There's a lot of back and forth emails going on.

It's not a, you know. It's not a backyard. It's a front doorway operation. It's a thriving industry. It's a hallway operation. What about if we see if anyone wants to intern for us at that level where we can have interns in the Little Dum Dum Club? No, I think we're interning ourselves. Yeah, good. Well, that's been evident the last couple of weeks. Our episodes have been a bit late. We do want to apologise for that. It's been the holiday season in the studios.

Stuff's been closed when we thought we'd be able to get in here. That's made it a bit harder. I do want to say this, last week and the week before we put up notices saying that the episode was running late. And I do want to give a big round of applause to all the people who commented on the comments that we... On Facebook. On Facebook that we put on there. Some sterling work. Some great Sean McAuliffe references.

Some Gast references. A lot of various tropes coming into play that was very good to see. Some people are seriously thinking there's going to be a test at the end of this whole podcast experience of the Dum Dum Club. People have been swatting up. People know their stuff. It's very good. Last week's one I was editing was that under the pump that I had to edit it quickly in the afternoon

at my girlfriend's house before I went out for dinner with her family. So I was sitting there with my headphones in just trying to get it done. And she goes, hey, let's just put it over the speakers because I want to hear it as you're doing it as well. And I'm like, okay. So she's sitting there with me while I'm editing and she's laughing at bits and I'm sort of just looking at the screen. And I notice after a couple of minutes that she's gone silent. I look over. She's fallen asleep.

Just the show has put her to sleep. So if you're looking for the perfect time to listen and you've got insomnia, maybe that can be a bit of a cure. Yeah. Yeah, well, I mean, my girlfriend has started listening now, so we're one all, I think. We've lost one, but we've gained one. Maybe this can be like a thing where people listen to it. You know how you can get those Spanish language tapes that you listen to in your sleep? Maybe we can start a bit of that going, so you can learn how to be more of a dickhead

if you just put this on while you're sleeping. Hey, that'll work. Yeah, yeah. Today on the program- Oh, can we do this first? Whoa. I hadn't finished. Okay.

Because we were talking about T-shirts before. I just want to say this, because we've been moving quite a bit of merch this week. Yes. Now, today, just today, I went and posted three T-shirts in the mail. All grey? No. One grey. One part grey, two parts navy.

I'll take it. Yeah, yeah. Fair enough. That's pretty good. Yeah, yeah. Fair enough. That's pretty good. Yeah, yeah. And it just shows our wide and varied international listenership. The places I was sending it out to. I think I know where this is going.

No, no. No, I'm being serious. Okay. Because out of three t-shirts today, one was sent to Missouri in the United States. I've heard of that in America. Yes, yes. That's been in movies. One went to Iowa.

Okay. Iowa in the Congo. In the United States of America. And one went to Box Hill. I have been getting a couple of requests where the addresses are not that far from my house. I know. And I'm still hassling them about, yeah, send us the postage fee when, look, I'm not doing a lot at the moment. I could pretty easily just get on my little bike and ride it around your house.

One said, I work in Hawthorne. I'm like, I live in Hawthorne. Should I just walk to his work? What about we do an offer for the next T-shirt we get that's within driving distance of our house, we'll personally deliver it to you. In Melbourne. In 30 minutes from the request or it's of our house, we'll personally deliver it to you. In Melbourne. In 30 minutes from the request or it's free. Yeah, okay.

No, no, no. No, not that. Let's actually rock up to someone's house. That'd be funny. Yeah, but what if they want to pay extra for us to not do that? I'll take it. Like the nappy sand challenge. The dum-dum challenge.

Yeah, yeah. And the t-shirt's got to be hot or it's half price. And you get garlic bread. Just quickly, because we are setting a new record for how long it's taken us to introduce a guest. A mate of mine was telling me a little while ago he ordered a pizza from the local pizza shop. So the pizza guy turns up, hands over his garlic bread, hands over his Coke, opens up the hot box and goes, Oh, shit. He'd forgotten to put the pizza in.

No pizza. How's that? If you're a pizza guy and you're forgetting the pizza, what are you? You're just a guy in a car. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're not a pizza guy. You're a guy. Yeah.

Yeah. Good. All right. Our guest today, sitting very patiently and not interrupting, which is a challenge that most people on this show can't handle. Yeah, and he's also fallen asleep like your girlfriend, but yeah. He is an old mate of both of ours. You will have seen him on Good News Week, Good News World, the Comedy Festival Gala.

He won Best Show at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival. Please welcome into the little dum-dum club, Sammy J. Yay! Yay! Hey, dudes. Hello to you. Hello to your listeners. Thanks for having me.

Thanks for sitting there patiently. I should correct you. It's 50% of the Best Show I won. Oh, of course. Yeah. With Heath McIver. Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Let's still, do you have to cut the award in half? Yeah, we got a chainsaw and, you know, it was better than a custody arrangement. That would be great if they really did make you. That's, when you say Heath McIver, that's Randy. Yes, indeed. Sammy Jane Randy, which I feel a bit of a kinship with you because we've both got a double act and I've got a puppet sidekick

like yourself. There it is. A tiny little puppet sidekick. And I do like that, you know, of course, Randy the purple puppet isn't here today, but you are wearing a purple t-shirt almost as like a sign of, you know, always sort of having him close to you in some way. Everyone knew that already on the show. And this was made of Randy's actual skin.

So I currently got a lot of polystyrene sitting at home. That's a great merch idea. Randy's skin t-shirts. I was wondering why you had eyeballs on your back. A little mouth. I feel your merch pain actually. I grossly overestimated how many people would like to buy my own DVD 12 months

ago and so I purchased a whole bunch of boxes from the distributor. And it got to the point last year where in my sort of early gigs I'd be like, hey, got DVDs to sell? I'd be standing proudly by the door. And then got to the point last year where in my sort of early gigs, I'd be like, hey, you got DVDs to sell? I'd be standing proudly by the door. And then by the end of the year, I was sort of almost embarrassed about announcing it and sort of meek,

like a rabbit in the headlights apologising in advance. Yeah, yeah. But, like, don't worry, guys. I mean, not many of you will want them. I understand that, but I'll just be there. And then I had, like, my final two shows of the year were down at a little hometown shows in Frankston, down by the bay.

And my lady agreed to sell my merchandise for me. And they sold like hotcakes. They went right off the shelf. And I later found out she was like hassling people down to get rid of them because they've been taking up so much room. And she was just putting the hard word on. It was brilliant. Oh man, that's a good technique.

So next time I've got something to sell, I'm going to leave them all over the kitchen in the corridor, just have her tripping over them, put them on her when she's sleeping, and then employ her to sell them again. It was a short fight. Put them in the bathroom cabinet, like throw out all her little lady gear. Yeah. Massively.

Cover her side of the bed when she's out, and then when she comes home, you're on the couch until you get rid of all this. There's not room for you. That is the other side of showbiz when you've got merch where you put on this great show and everyone's in awe of you on stage. You're the master of entertainment and then you stand at the back of the show and go, oh, can I have 15 bucks off anyone?

Can I do that? And it is dangerous if you've got leftover merch around the time of year that we just went through. If you've got all this excess stuff taking up room in the boot of your car and then it gets near Christmas and you sort of start thinking, oh man, if I just, what if I just get, I'll kill two birds with one stone, I'll save money on Christmas presents and I'll get rid of some of these damn things. Mum and dad want a Haymates shirt, don't they? Grandma?

Grandma's up in front? Oh, she can't read by now anyway, so she'll wear anything. All the tiny, horrible decisions you have to make, like what do you use to keep your money in? I actually found a little pencil case, which is like a green pencil case and it's got little dollar bills all over it. It's quite cute. And so I was using that for a while but it became pathetically, the irony was

terrible that I was putting no dollars into the case. And so I ended up just getting a little sort of box. But you know, you want to look a little bit rock and grunge and not too desperate whilst being anything but rock and grunge and entirely desperate. Yeah, you want the little metal Tim with the fuck the police sticker on it. You could have just got people to stick money in Randy's mouth.

That would have been, that's something. That's true. I don't know how Heath would have felt about that. Well, pretty happy he would have had a handful of dollar bills. I'm so incompetent at the merch selling thing that when I have tried to flog CDs at the end of gigs, I'm so disorganized and nearsighted that I don't even think to get change. So people will go, oh, how much is that?

Oh, $12. Oh, I've got a $20. Have you got change? Nah. Oh, well, don't worry about it then. All right, see you later. Thanks. Thanks for that.

And I do that. And I just say, like, it literally gets down to what have you got. I'm battering them down to their lowest denomination. Like, you've got a $5? That'll totally be it. Can I just have a lift home? Well, anyone from Tennis Friends of the show, they had a CD, they made a CD not that long ago,

and I think once they got it back, I think it was like two, three weeks later after they'd got it back, they were at a gig that I was at, and I said, oh, are you guys going to sell your CD after the show? And they're like, oh, no, we don't do that anymore. They'd gotten sick of it after like three weeks. Oh, wow. Well, they're old mates of yours, Sammy,

so they've learned from the merch master. Schoolmates, in fact. Doody and I, Doody, one half of anyone for tennis, used to get up and sing stupid songs at school together. Oh, wow. Well, between the three of us, we are going to take up quite a big space in the landfill, I'd say, with our various merchandise.

Our little mugs sticking out when the aliens come in a couple of thousand years. I feel like the little Dum Dum Club is going to have a wing at the landfill named after it and dedicated to it. More haymats. No, they're moving. They are moving. They're moving rapidly this week.

This is a great trick. This happened last week. We just talked about T-shirts the whole way through, and we shifted record numbers. So we just keep doing that every week from now on. Yeah, just get Harley Brennan to rag it for an hour. Yeah, if we just rename the show The T-Shirt Hour, we'll be sailing high. So, Sammy, you were telling us in the elevator on the way up here that the last time you

were in this building, the Austereo building from which Triple M is broadcast, you got in a bit of trouble for saying some naughty words on the air. Only one naughty word. Okay, yes. I presume you can say fuck in World Dum Dum. We'll have to check with the estate of Steve Jobs, but it should be all right. Well, yeah, it was actually only like a month ago.

It was just before Christmas, final episode of the Peanut Gallery, which was good fun. They had me on a few times and they kindly invited me on to sort of sing a song. Honorary peanut. Honorary peanut. Honorary peanut of the show. You know, one of these FM sort of, you know, like warm beer and sausage sort of affair

up on the roof. Yeah. You're not in the gallery yet. You're hanging in the foyer. Very much so. The peanut foyer. Yeah. I'm ready to be salted.

Yeah. A gallery's not open air, is it? It's not technically a gallery. No. I don't know what that is. But I was there. I was ready to go. I had a little CD backing track.

I'm going to sing a little bit of, you know, acclaimed musical comedy for the listeners of FM radio. Got into it and the track didn't start. Something was wrong with their CD player, you know, and rest assured, gentlemen, I had burned it at four times speed. Like I wasn't in this 16, hop in the car. I was very meticulous about my choice of media and the way with which I approached it. But no, something went wrong.

Made a few jokes. Got away with it. Went to an ad break. Came back ready to go again. Song started. Got into it. Got my first little laugh. Up to the chorus.

CD starts skipping. It's 2011 and the CD is skipping. They've probably never had to play a CD at a radio station. All manner of USBs and things. I do remember how frustrating it was in 2011 when stuff wouldn't work. and the CD is skipping. They've probably never had to play a CD at a radio station. I'd offer them all manner of USBs and things. I do remember how frustrating it was in 2011 when stuff wouldn't work. I know. Shocking.

So I struggled through before it became painfully apparent I could not continue with this song. And so instead I began, I guess you could call it a freestyle rap. You know, yo, peanut gallery, what you done to me, et cetera, et cetera, which I can't remember the details, but it ended with the line, triple M, you've effed my career. And what was like quite a lighthearted, jovial affair suddenly turned a little bit weird in that we sort of all had to run inside to this particular building and check

whether or not they'd press the dump button and so on and so forth. Oh, really? And all those moments were, you know, the guys themselves were cool with it, but everyone's worried about their backs and everyone's worried about other people. You know, it's, and, and, and, you know, it's just a word. And secondly, I put to them in no uncertain terms that they had actually effed my career because that invited me on as a comedian. You know, you're meant to be funny

and you don't look very funny when you're battling with a CD player and you can't sing your song. So I went for the laugh. Admittedly, you know, prime time whilst families were listening, I grant you. But what would you do? So no triple M executives buying merch from you

on the way out is what you're saying? No, not at the moment. What would you do, Tommy? You're singing a song. You know what I did? I actually did the same show probably a little bit before you, and it was the same setup, open air and barbecue.

Please, God, let this story finish with you freestyle rapping. I will do anything if that can happen. No, they had barbecue, and they had an audience of about 15 people who were very, very uninterested in what was going on, apart from the sausages and the free beer. And I did my little thing. It was like a minute of stand-up that I had to do or whatever. And I started with a joke about Adelaide.

And after I did the joke, which got a laugh, one of the guys from Triple M went, actually said on the air, we actually go into Adelaide. And I went, and because I'm used to this sort of setup and not caring what I say or whatever, I then answered on air, oh, well, sorry, boys, what have I messed up your big listenership of 30 people over there, have I? And so that went down even worse. I did not get a sausage.

Yeah, wow, I've never done a sausage. Yeah. Wow. I've never done this. One could argue that being so sort of, you know, protective of the people of Adelaide is more offensive to the people of Adelaide than simply letting them, you know, have the joke at their own. Yeah. At this point, I think they know.

They know where they are. They do hold a pretty big comedy festival in which everyone rips the crap out of them annually. Word's got back to them. That is funny going to shows at the Adelaide Fringe Festival in the final week. And, you know, there's people there that go to a lot of shows and seeing the comedian on stage go, Oh, how about how shit this place is? And like, you know, they've gone to three weeks worth of this and they're just jack of it.

Yeah, we know. Yeah, good one, mate. Yeah, but to be fair, I mean, that was a rough gig. I was doing my best. Your CD had started skipping. Now, Sammy, you've just come off the back of being a big part of a network TV show, Good News World. So it's recently finished.

So that was on the air for... Recently deceased, I think, is the industry. Oh, right. I'm trying to be nice. So it's not coming back definitely to be honest definitely

once you started free style rapping in the last episode that was the nail in the coffin once you say you've ruined

my career Paul McDermott you can't I used the expression McDermott you've fucked my career

on the final episode in a sketch oh you hack you hack. Maybe that's why. You hack. No, I just realised it was like a week after. You've just put it all together.

That's why I was so quick. Blaming everyone but yourself for your career. Hey, just back up. To give this a bit of context, Good News World. By the way, this will not wreck your career, so don't have a go at us by the end of the episode. Well, let's give it 50 minutes and see. Just to follow up, Good News World, of course, was the follow-up to Carpet World for those not familiar with it.

So now... Because you asked whether it would come back. My honest answer is I would be the last to know. As far as being... It was my first time involved in a whole sort of series. I would be genuinely surprised if they told me before they told you. Oh, you never know. Over a beer.

Yeah, no, I'd be the last on the production chain. Let me specify. But I don't think so because ratings are one thing. And general network decisions and everything. Look, I'm just an armchair commentator. I have a lovely armchair, don't get me wrong. Your armchair is on the set of the show. But no, from what I gather, there's a lot of, what's the word,

flux and fucking around. Yeah, okay. I understand the last one. I didn't get the first one. So at this stage, no, I don't think so. But like I said, it was like, I think, a couple of weeks before that show started that we got the word that it was starting. So I would never rule sort of anything out. But in this occasion, I will. What do they say to you?

Do they come in and say, oh, the show's finished for the season and see you soon? Or do they actually tell you anything? No, look, I guess, you know, this is, I don't want to bore you or your listeners, so please tell me when it starts. No, no, no, this is fascinating to at least us. But this is like, I've had two experiences of real, you know, TV sketch comedy.

One was my first sort of big break on a show called Let Loose Live. Ah, yes. In 2005, which has been on the- Was that clang for 2005 or for the show? I don't know. It came in a bit late for Let Loose Live and then I realised a clang for 2005 is pretty good anyway. Probably suitable.

The clang that Let Loose Live caused cast a pall over the whole decade. It was one of these ones, the network just swung their cock out and went, let's do a comedy show. And it just took down TV for two weeks. Two weeks it lasted. It got axed. Guy Sebastian was due to host the third episode and got turned around at the airport.

Oh, wow. And the sadder than that is the fact that I was really looking forward to meeting Guy Sebastian. I was probably more disappointed about that than not actually doing the show. Sammy, it was 2005. It was a different time. And of course, to international listeners, Guy Sebastian was the first winner of Australian Idol.

Yeah. And this is so early in your career that you didn't even blame Channel 7 for wrecking your career after that show. You know, I went home. I wouldn't believe it. I remember the moment I went home and looked at myself in the mirror and said,

Sammy J, you have fucked your own career. I've never taken such responsibility. I do remember getting on your MySpace and saying, you've ruined me, Guy Sebastian. This is all your fault. It was quite something. You know, you have little moments that you imagine. You wish had been filmed in high definition so that you could have a bit of a scene of your life.

And I'd played a little song on a piano on the second, nay, final episode. And I had to go back. It's funny to think that you, it'd be funny to think on your first episode that you came out and went, now on the penultimate episode of Let Loose Live, I'd just like to do this little ditty. It's like, it's like, it's like the sort of, you know, McAuliffe styled wrap up of let's see, let's wrap up the series so far. But it actually was the wrap-up.

As I quipped at the time, you could fit the best of the series on a floppy disk. Not so relevant now, of course. Media has moved on. Anyway, it was like a few days later, I had to go in and collect all my stuff and went in and collected my keyboard. How much stuff did you have in there?

You've been there for two weeks. A keyboard and three buckets worth of tears. And I was walking out of the Channel 7 studio down at Coventry Street in South Melbourne, and there was a huge crowd of people waiting to go and play Who Dares Wins. Like, the audience. Oh, wow. Hang on, no, I've just totally... No, it was the other one.

No, it wouldn't have been Who Dares Wins. Sorry, sorry, deal or no deal. Because I was in my head going, how long ago was that? Mike Whitney in my head. Exactly. Meanwhile, you're walking out of the building with your suitcases and they're thinking that you're about to go in there and whack a wig on and be part of the show.

The people waiting for Deal or No Deal must have been wondering why you were blaming the failure of your career on Mike Whitney. No, Tanya, actually. Sex, et cetera. But I was walking out and it was just... Sex, et cetera, the sequel to Sex, Author. Yeah, that was one classy reference to what Tanya Zahida went through.

I couldn't be bothered coming up with a punchline. I liked it much better. Insert appropriate quip regarding army-based shenanigans. Anyway, look, the story, I can't remember. The banter has been better than the story. The point is, I walked past these groups. They all, I think, recognised because it had been a spectacular failure in that it rated really well

the first week and so abysmally the second week and so people sort of saw me and all sort of averted their gaze as I struggled with my massive electronic piano past them and into my Volvo, my grandparents' Volvo. They weren't driving.

They were dead at the time. They were dead at the time? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So what are they now? Very much living. It was a minor clinical death but happened to coincide with the time at which

I could drive their vehicle. Well, anyway, it was just one of those moments. They were just waiting for Let Loose Live to finish until they came back. The second episode killed them. Along with most of the viewing public.

So that was, it was, but I bounced back really quickly because I was, you know, as you say, it was like early on and you're just like, whatever, you know, you know, you sort of rock on with that. But I was geared up with this one, with Good News World. I was, I was joking to everyone and sincerely so that, that if it got axed, you know, after three weeks, that was fine with me. I just wanted to make it past that two-week curse. Kate McLennan had the same thing with, a friend of the show, Kate McLennan,

had the same thing with Live from Planet Earth. Because we were on Let Loose Life together. Yeah. And we were sort of the two new faces, if you like. We remained new faces thereafter. So now the two of you have to team up, I reckon. That's the next step. Yep.

Go on and just drive a comedy bus through Australian television. And then when the bus doesn't work, you can blame her for your career. It's natural progression. And then go to the funeral of your grandparents again. I'll fit it in at some point. We haven't scheduled it yet. So going back even further than that, and this is something that I've always been fascinated by.

Your first ever television appearance was on Red Faces on the original Hey Hey. I'm so glad you specified. What a strange time to choose to take a drink of ice break as I'm in the middle of answering your question. Are you asking me a question? No, I was rolling on J time and you will wait for me to finish my ice break. In fact, I'm going to have another sip now.

You just, as you were saying it, you stared at it lovingly as if to say, soon, soon this will be over and we can be together. I'm trying to do it all. I'm trying to have it all. You said the original Hey, I Hate Saturday series, which means a lot to me because since the bastard child returned, Avador, you said the original Hey Hey It's Saturday series, which means a lot to me because since, you know, the bastard child returned, it's been so less cool for me to be able to claim that I was on Hey Hey It's Saturday.

Who hasn't? It was back for like a couple of months. Everyone got their face on. Yeah, it was so cool to be on Red Faces before then. Was it cool at all? Because it was retro. I was like, if you said it on Countdown or something, for better or worse, it was part of Australian television furniture.

When this show isn't going anymore in three years' time, it'll be cool to say you were on this. Oh, you're putting a three-year, putting three years on it, okay. When I realise that you've ruined my career, I drag your name through the mud to anyone who'll listen. So how old were you when you were on Red Faces? I was 15. I was 15. I was 15.

It was one of the, like, yeah, it was. And for international listeners, Red Faces is like a talent. Gong show. Gong show, exactly. Gong show within a show. Yeah. Within this weird variety show. I dare say, if you're in America, I dare say there'll be some good clips on YouTube.

Oh, yeah. Are you on YouTube, Fahey? No, I've got the footage. I haven't put it up. Oh. Really? You should. Will you send me Jay then, I've got the footage. I haven't put it up. Really? You should. Were you Sammy J then or were you your original?

It almost sounds made up because it's quite like a comical sort of bit of formative footage because it's the first time I ever went by the name Sammy J. Oh, really? I sort of picked my sort of nickname for that moment and Darryl introduces me, Darryl Summers, the host as Sammy J. Look at you on first name basis with him. Darryl Smers, the host. Look at you on first name basis with him. Darryl S. That was for

international audiences, not for any claim to have regularly dine wine or 69 with the Summers. Summers or Carol. Or Aussie or Wilbur or the game. American listeners must be baffled. Look up Hey Hey It's Saturday.

And look up Harry Connick Jr. Hey Hey It's Saturday annual. Or don't, but he can. So, yeah, it was cool. It was really good fun. Did you win? No, I came second. Oh, to what?

Who? You don't want to know. Who are you? Yeah. Local reference coming up. Angus Kennett. Oh, really? Son of the Premier, former Premier of the State of Victoria.

Son of Jeff. He was at the time a well-known model. And what was he doing on... Sorry, I just fucked that massively. I didn't come second to him. I came second because of him. He was judging. Oh, right.

I just realised that I made it sound like Angus Kennett had gone on after his father had been the Premier. And that was his act? Showing his father's credentials or showing laws that he'd slipped in? Next up is Angus Kennett with my father's political career. Lay down a beat. Privatised industry. Grot breed. Grot breed of Melbourne.

Red Simons, usually I'm a bit of an arsehole, but that was awesome. Nine. But you've got Nick Brax competing on Dancing with the Stars. So is it so insane that a politician's son would be on a talent show? Not in this day and age, but I think it just goes back to me blaming again. Yeah, yeah. He was effectively my competitor. He's doing the way of me getting my $400 check from McDonald's,

and so I don't even know who the talent was that beat me. What did he say? You've moved on from individuals to blaming an entire government for the ruining of your career. What did he say to you? What was his score for you? He said, I've actually got, because to give it context, I sang a song called The Nerd Song, stunningly original,

15-year-old gear, and I walked on and got the laugh without my shirt on because I'm a skinny bastard. Right. You know, with a sort of concave chest, if you like. I do like. And he said, I actually have the exact same body as you, so I enjoyed that. Now, it wasn't a come on. It was self-deprecating humour because he doesn't have the...

He was a model and he was, I think, with the benefit of 12 years hindsight, he was very much taking the piss. Ah, yes. Right. And if he's listening and I'm, you know, I hope he is, I'll get you, Ken. And what did he give you, a low score because of that? Just picking on your chest? Well, no, because he was being friendly, you know, like he said, I quite liked it because, you know, I guess I'm much better and sexier than you.

Yeah. And I gave me like a seven. Well, that didn't wreck your career at all. No, but he gave the bat that beat me a higher score, and they beat me as a result. So who was the act that beat you? Probably a budgerigar on a beach ball or something, knowing red faces.

Yeah, yeah, exactly. It was, you know, insert Livin' Your Nixon quip as appropriate. No, it was actually a group called The Nerd Factor. They had like a nerd theme. Whoa, they've beaten it your own game. Massively by like four nerds at once. Who, to be fair, were really funny and really good and I was neither of those things.

I have no rational gripe. But getting to school after doing Red Faces, you're either going to be hailed as a hero or have the piss taken out of you a lot and losing on Red Faces, you're either going to be hailed as a hero or, you know, have the piss taken out of you a lot. And losing on Red Faces just takes that cool factor. Even to have won, it wouldn't be that cool. But to have lost is probably...

Yeah, yeah, exactly. It really takes whatever edge you may have salvaged off it. But what, were you in year 10? Yeah. Year 10? Yeah, that's pretty cool to come into school having been on TV, surely. It gave me, like, it was the moment I stopped caring about, you know, insults and everything. Because I was just like, you did that.

Because you'd gone showbiz. I'd gone massively showbiz. And I was 15. Too cool to hang out with Andrew Doodson from Anyone for Tennessee. But not cool enough to mispronounce his name. So Doodson remained a good friend. Yeah, piss off, Dootson. I've got a little mate made out of felt from now on.

I'll be hanging with him. He was probably one of the few that slapped me on the back and said, well done. But no, it was cool. Did Dickie Nee give you the inspiration to start hanging out with Randy the Puppet? Is that where it all came from? It's all about that.

I looked into his non-existent eyes and thought you and me were going places. Or a reasonable facsimile of you. Tommy and I were talking. I'm looking at Tommy as I say that, so I should say you and I. Tommy who? Oh, yep. Yourself.

Hey, Carl, Tommy and I were talking before the show about TV in general and ratings, because at the time, I think two million people watched that episode. Of? Yeah, which was just like what it was rating at the time. Oh, wow. Because there were so few channels on TV, and it was just one of those event things. And no internet. Like that's all anyone had to do.

Yeah. And these days it's just commenting how, you know, like 700,000 people watching the show, you know, you know, it's a very different ballgame. So it was one of those things where everyone saw it as well in my little town. Yeah, for sure. People's career used to be made by, you know by a spot on Hey Hey Saturday and stuff like that.

Whereas, yeah, like you said, there's actually things to do. It gets a little bit diluted. So let's just give, because I am really interested in giving context for any international listeners who haven't seen Hey Hey. And I think it's funny to actually really assess it for what it is. Because we do, having grown up with it, we sort of take it for granted. But when you really examine it, so what year were you on it, Sammy? What year?

I was on, in the year 1999, that was its 29th year continuously on television, and it got axed a few months later. Right. I take no responsibility. You ruined their career. You made that clear. You made that very clear throughout this interview. So for a long time, that was like the big kind of variety chat show. If someone from overseas came over to promote something,

that was like the one thing that they would do. And they would always come on it and go, what is this show? Yeah, and it was ridiculous. And you'd go, what's wrong with it? Part of the joy was the celebrities. As you said, it was the one-stop shop for a big celebrity. Yeah, that was it. And they would get really sort of weirded out by the fact

that a puppet would pop up and talk to them. So let's say this for international listeners. It's a show co-hosted by a pink ostrich puppet. So that's going on the whole time. So you're out here to promote whatever, in the line of fire or whatever you're out here doing. Sylvester Stallone's out. Yeah, there is a great clip on YouTube.

Sylvester Stallone's out promoting Stop My Mother With Shoe. There is a great clip of Stallone on it, and he's there just in a suit or whatever, being interviewed by Daryl Summers, the main host, who's dressed like Rambo, no shirt on with the bullets around his chest, and Ozzy the Pink Ostrich is wearing a bandana. And then at one point there's this thing on it called Dickie Knee.

It was this big mop of black hair. Another puppet. Another puppet who would pop up every now and then and make wisecracks. And there is a point when Stallone's just talking about whatever movie he's promoting, Dickie Knee pops up up out of nowhere and Stallone loses his shit. Because clearly he hasn't been given the proper brief on what the show is. Because otherwise you'd just think that these people are insane and I'm not doing this show. This is like a dream someone's had after they've had too much cheese or whatever.

And there's so many things going on because there's Dickie Nee popping up. There's a pink ostrich on the desk. There's a cartoonist on site all the time so every couple of minutes

suddenly get a cartoon pop up on screen about what they're talking about I've got two

original of those cartoons of myself oh really you've got fiveies I've got some fiveies then there's

someone playing sound effects as well then there's a narrator John Blackman narrating as well and then you've

got a house band Letterman style bringing it on the left and we haven't even mentioned Pluck a Duck John Blackman narrating as well. And then you've got a house band Letterman style bringing it on the left. Yeah. And we haven't even mentioned Pluck a Duck. There's something happening at every, there's something ridiculous wedged in every single particle of the show.

Meanwhile, Russell Gilbert is off doing like an outside broadcast at like a McDonald's, you know, punking people. He's harassing the audience. So it's just, everything is going on. Yeah, and it was designed as a kid show. And all of a sudden it was stuck on prime time. It started in the mornings here, then it went to... And so, like we were saying about internationals coming on,

they would be on the show. And all this weird crap happening all around them. But we all as watchers would be like, you know, Stallone can't handle that. We got him! We got him! Yeah, you're in Australiaone can't handle that. We got him. We got him. Yeah, you're in Australia now, buddy.

Hey. None of this. No Johnny Carson now, mate. Haven't got your one-liners to fall back on in our crazy world. That is like the one thing, like, you know, I talk about this with friends a lot. Like there's certain, I kind of wish I could do a bit of Men in Black memory erase on myself. Like, you know, Friday Night Lights I was talking about with my girlfriend last night. I wish I could erase that from my memory

and just watch it all through the first time again. I would love to delete all knowledge from my head of Hey Hey It's Saturday and just sit down and watch it. You know, I'd love to see that. And that's,

if you're listening and you're overseas and you've never seen it before, that is the joy that you now get to experience if you look up Hey Hey It's Saturday on YouTube. Okay, so I want to talk about this.

I've been sitting on this for a week. Sammy J, we've gone through a lot of your credits and a lot of stuff you've done. You've got your own dedicated Wikipedia page that I've got up here that I've been looking at. You've got your career, you've got your personal background, which is awesome. You've got a full page there.

We've talked on this show a lot about vandalising Wikipedia. That's a thing that our listeners do. They insert references of us. I, from time to time, will Google this show just to see if anyone is saying anything about it, like what's going on with it. I did that the other day and I found someone has made a Wikipedia page for this show. Oh, really?

And Wikipedia took it down! Oh, what? They removed it! Why? I don't know! I don't know! Hang on, so in the... You mentioned your adept at a little bit of Wikipedia tomfoolery. Yeah. Are they sort of doing it in the name of the dum-dums? Is that what's going on? Because Wikipedia have somehow, or maybe their netbots have associated you with malware.

They've red-flagged us. And malicious work. They've traced it back. Yeah. So they just think that the dum-dumb Club itself is just a fictional entity. They're trying to erase us from history. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know what's going on there.

I don't know whether the mischief that we've created, like they've just seen it come through and gone, oh, this asshole. So I tried to find it now and I couldn't. The old podcast banksies over here. I tried to find it before and I couldn't, but when I found it, it was like a placeholder page that sort of said, this used to be here and now it's not. And there was a little message from the administrator who had removed it saying, yeah, I took this

down. I can't remember what the reasoning was, but I would argue, because we didn't put that up there. I would argue if you're at a point where someone else is putting up a Wikipedia page for you, you deserve to have a page up there. Yeah. Guys, after this, you're going to walk out the building, try and use a credit card, and it'll say, this is the moment that shit flipped.

Yeah. Matt Damon is going to be playing both of us in some sort of weird movie in a couple of years' time. But you know what? I'm not having this. I'm not having it at all. Yeah, that's not right. So I'm saying to the listeners,

we've given you Wikipedia challenges before. You've done us proud. I want Little Dumb Dumb've done us proud. I want Little Dum Dum Club permanently on Wikipedia. I want us up there and I want it to stick. So what you were saying is, can someone do our work for us? Yes, please. Because I actually think you know, we sometimes get

caught up. We exist. I'm going to have to stop you there, boys. I'm actually here as part of your... I'm here to reintegrate you into society. I'm your new name. Is this an intervention? Look, we don't use that word in the identity world.

So what are we called? What are we going to be called now? Well, Jonathan, it's a very good question. Peter Walsall and Jeff Key. We've discussed this. But we found you a very lovely job in finance. Oh, finance podcast? Just finance.

And Stephen, you'll be working at the zoo. Okay, what am I going to be doing at the zoo? Finances. Zoo finances. So am I managing the accounts of the animals themselves? Actually, you'll be managing the accounts of your new wife, who is quite high up at the zoo.

Is she an animal? Well, spend a few hours with her and see. Oh, sex. Sex. Sex, etc. No, she's just a woman, but she was the right criteria for your new life. I will say, even only having scant details, this already sounds better than my current life. So I'm on board.

I'm signed up. Back to Wikipedia though, because I want to know what's going on. Guys, I want you to get on it, because here's what I was going to say. Because this show, we just hang out with our mates, we talk about stuff that's happened before. Sometimes I think we get lost and it can be confusing for people. I want a page that

lists all the bullshit that's included in this show. I want the back for people, I want a page that lists all the bullshit that's included in this show. Yeah. You know, I want the backstories. I want the, you know, the Maryborough stuff. Can we tell what was on the page before it was taken down or? No, I tried to find, I couldn't find anything. So get, if my theory is, if we just keep, if people just keep doing it, then they'll

have no choice but to relent. Yeah. All right. We're going to take Wikipedia on. I love a little bit of online tomfoolery. A few weeks ago, I did a little Facebook challenge where I'd try and pick, it's not the most original idea, but picked a really crappy YouTube video

and tried to make it into a hit overnight. This one, and I found it takes quite a bit of effort to find the right one. I wanted it to have like under five views, and it had to be really dull. It couldn't be something that was remotely interesting. But it couldn't just be bad boring. It had to be quite beautifully boring.

So nothing from Hey Hey. No, no, no. That was exactly it. Too many colours. Too much wackiness. I found a video called, I think it's something like Arizona, no, Chandler Garage Door Services. In Arizona. It is a video advertisement for a garage door company,

and it's got this whack-a-whack-a porn music playing and just garage doors opening with the phone number listed there. Oh, great. And in 24 hours, we managed to get it up to, I think last time it was left at like 1,500 views and hundreds of comments from hilarious Facebook fans and friends who were just writing all about their favourite specific moment. Oh, check out the door opening at 27 seconds.

Hey, you know what would be really funny if you did that with one of our clips? Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Oh. Mate, what are you angry about? Your bloody garage door company, Chandler's Doors, they're getting a lot of press. My rello's in Arizona. They're getting a lot of press. My Rello's in Arizona. They must send them a T-shirt. You gave that a giggle when you said it before.

I didn't know. I was going to giggle like, oh, shit, have I told this story before? Your name is definitely... I was genuinely trying to remember the name of this company and I made no connection. That's because you'd already signed me my new name. Precisely. Very good. You committed.

You committed. You bring that up. You are known... That's because you'd already signed me my new name Precisely Thank you for remembering You're committed You bring that up You are known Is this fair? As a bit of a prankster I've heard some stories across the years of you Of some wily pranks that you've pulled Wily?

I remember early comedy festival days When you would do the comedy festival roadshow Which is after the comedy festival They do a tour of regional areas And a bunch of different comedians do gigs in remote places. You started drinking as I'm about to ask you something again. You, one thing I heard about you was that you were, yeah, you got a bit of a reputation as a bit of a prank lord on these tours.

Yeah, I went, I had dinner with some friends a few months ago and suddenly this conversation turned to pranks that I'd pulled amongst them, and they each had a story about me that I genuinely was hanging on to the end of my seat because I couldn't remember it. Because I adore a prank. Not harmful pranks and that sort of stuff, but all I want ever is for my mates to kidnap me and take me to Tasmania, stuff like that. That would be harmless.

It doesn't sound harmless at all. Kidnapping is technically a crime. That's true. But just cool shit where you go to that extra mile. And I think it started at school. I once arranged with a friend of mine to, we were just sitting in the library, and we waited for another friend to turn up.

And he was, for example, I can't remember, I think it was heading to the school gymnasium. And we arranged for my other friend who was there. Once the school gymnasium headed friend left the library, my mate raced ahead to the school gym, changed outfits completely. And I went and joined him. And we sat there in the same position like just eating our sandwiches. It was like in record time. We got there in like a minute.

So the guy just ambled in and we were just sitting there as if nothing had happened. We just moved, transported from the library like, what, oh, hey, man. And sort of stuff like that where you've just got to put a little bit of reason. Stuff where people think they've got a full-on mental disorder. That is the exact thing.

And so, yeah. So Roadshow... I heard a tale of you doing a bit of phone gear, getting your hands on people's phones and doing a bit of number swapping. Yeah. Fleety is the prime sort of owner of this anecdote, really, because he sort of was nothing if not encouraging of my shenanigans.

But the one that perhaps sticks out is when I had a moment of having access to Fleety's phone. And it was in credit as well. That is weird. That is a weird story already. You've got to invest in your jokes. You've got to invest. I put $10 on.

Was that the prank that you actually put credit in Fleety's phone? That was it. That was it. And it blew his mind. Wow. It was a much better prank. No, I changed my name in his phone to Harley Breen. I deleted Harley Breen's name.

Yeah. Harley Breen and Greg returned to the scene of the crime. It was quite late at night after several drinks. And I sent a message to Fleety saying, let's get Sammy J. stoned. And I was sitting there and everyone was a little bit off chops anyway. And the three of us are sitting there and Fleety's phone buzzes and he checks it thinking this is from Harley.

Yeah. Looks at Harley and winks. And Harley sort of just giggles and winks back because he doesn't know what's going on. And I sit there and then Fleety says to Harley, but how? And Harley's like, what? He's like, how are we going to do this? And because, as I say, drinks and someone had been consumed,

I got to sit back. It was like watching this Brechtian theatre. I got to sit back and watch this bizarre conversation. Harley was already freaked out because Fleety's phone worked. Yeah, yeah. You're thinking you're on the panel of red faces. You're just drawing a nine onto a credit card. Yeah!

I was just enjoying the ride. It was good fun. Try not to make me win this one, Angus, can I? This is a pearl. But he did. Angus swore he ruined everything. Had sex with Harley and ruined the whole thing. So, yeah, that was good fun.

And others, you know, some are more successful than others and some are less successful. But, you know, you've got to make the effort, don't you? Well, hearing your big prank history, you told me and Carl a couple of weeks ago that you were expecting a child and I'm now wondering if this is all part of some big master prank that you're trying to pull off. Yeah, it's my comedy festival show.

It's called I Thought I Had a kid and I've been filming everybody, going around, I told my mum, I told my dad. Sammy J's got a butt in the oven, question mark. I didn't have sex with you at all, my wife. No, yes, no, I am having a child. And that's not a joke. Yeah, we'll see. You know what's not a joke. Yeah, we'll see. We'll see.

You know what's going to happen. Your wife's going to be in the hospital, and she's going to cock open her legs, and one of those bang signs is going to come out like in a fake gun. We're going to have to call you up on the expression for pregnancy and the act of childbirth, cock open her legs, because that was pretty incredible. But instead of bang on the flag, it just her legs. Because that was pretty incredible. But instead of bang on the flag, it just says kid.

Yeah, yeah, right. Burn. Yeah, I had that real moment the other day. I was making some plans for, again, to match shenanigans. Some friends and I have invented a game called Political Bowl, which is like bowling. It is bowling, but instead of the overall score, it's about how many seats you win to form government.

This is no shit. Such nerds. It's such nerds, but it's just delicious. When you say with friends, are these the four guys that beat you on hey-hey? This is them. You made friends with just to get the sweet McDonald's money. Yeah, yeah. And, I mean, you can throw your nerd-based taunts at me.

They will bounce off me like an armadillo, my friends, because this is the sweetest hour you have spent. That's a very nerdy reference. Like an angry, sexy armadillo. With its legs cocked open. So it's just awesome because you don't know who's won until the end. It favours those who score badly because you've got to sort of group. The point being that in the process of doing this particular game,

I have massively forgotten the end of this story. That's right, because we are going to immediately flush your head down the toilet for doing any of this. What the hell were we just doing? Pranks? You were doing pranks, shenanigans. I think you just pranked us then with a story that went nowhere. No, it was kids.

Kids, sorry, I got back. Come on, we're going to get through this. We're going to get through this. We haven't ruined your career. It's okay. No, no, no. I've done a good job myself with that. No, no.

I was planning a mammoth political bowl, which is like the ultimate grand slam of elections to get like 20, 30 people. And yes, I will get that amount through sheer perseverance to come and play this game. And I was making all these plans for July. And then it ended. And Heath McIver, my colleague, was there with me. Friend and colleague, I should say. Sounded very clinical.

And I was like, oh, he's going to be great. We're going to have prizes. We're going to have this. Oh, shit, I'll have a kid. It was the first moment where my life where I realized I would be curtailed by having a child. Yeah, your kid is like pranking you by stopping you from doing things. You've wrecked your nerd life. Your nerd endeavors have been wrecked by actually having sex with someone.

I know. The irony is, I finally got there. I finally did it. And now I can't play my nerdy ball games. What a shame. Hey, I've got some updates. I just want to update people. Okay, we're getting to the end, so we'll close off on this.

Okay, we're updating from last week. We talked about a lot of weight, weight issues and stuff like that. On the scales this week, me and my girlfriend have been still training and watching what we eat and running and training and whatever. I have lost nearly a kilo this week, which is pretty good. My girlfriend's lost a kilo and a half. Wow. And you?

I haven't been on the scales, but I have. I have. Really? Been running. Oh, but you haven't been on the scales, but I have. I have. Really? Been running. Oh, but you haven't been on the scales. I've been on the scales. I haven't done the initial, like, check, you know. You know what?

I never go on the scales. Right. I just don't do it, you know. I just go by how I feel. Such a cop. Yes. No, you know what it is? I guess Palmer feels good in my mouth.

Oh, I've had a successful week. I don't like having that initial, the start of the reality of what the number actually is. But that's how it works. You know what? I think I've proved with these figures here. I get results. Yeah. Time to hire me.

But you still would have done that amount of exercise and you'll be hitting anyway. Well, let's get you on the scales. All right. We'll get on the scales. But my point being, I've cut out a lot of shit. I went for a run with my girlfriend for the first time last night, because she hasn't run for ages. And I've been saying to her for ages, hey, let's go for a run together.

Let's go for a run. And she hasn't wanted to, because she's like, no, I haven't done it for ages. You know, you'll be faster than me, whatever. I'm like, no, let's do it. No, no, no. Have you had a look at me? Finally talked... No, come on, mate.

It's not last week. Finally talked her into doing it. You know, we went to the park together, and I'm thinking, no, let's do it. No, no, no. Have you had a look at me? Finally talked. No, come on, mate. It's not last week. Finally talked her into doing it. You know, we went to the park together and I'm thinking, I'm thinking this will be good because she's thinking she's going to be shit. So I'll get that, you know, be a bit of a man and like, oh, you know, I'll do better than her. And I'll, that'll be a bit of a confidence boost that quite frankly I need right now. And she just fucking thrashed me.

She just like, she did more running than, she did like the laps quicker. She left a bit before me. You're telling this like that was a surprise ending. Yeah, it was a surprise to me. No surprise to me. Living in, you don't know anything about my fitness. Yeah, but I have taken up the dumb dumb challenge. I'm going to go for a run with Harley Breen.

I'm going to hook that up soon. If you were serious, you'd be running with me, buddy. Any dumb dumb listeners who want to go for a run with Harley Brain. I'm going to hook that up soon. If you were serious, you'd be running with me, buddy. Any dumb, dumb listeners who want to go for a run or whatever with me, I'm going to do that. I'm going to do that. And I'm considering, I'm considering, I'm considering letting you exercise with me. I'm thinking about it. I'm just, yeah, I'm, I'm, yeah, I'm thinking about it.

I nearly texted you on, I think Friday afternoon saying, do you want to run the Tantan? Yeah, let's do it. Let thinking about it. I nearly texted you on, I think, Friday afternoon saying, do you want to run the Tantan? Yeah, let's do it. And then I went to McDonald's instead. I didn't do that at all. I didn't do that at all. Let's do it. Hey, all right, very quickly, I want to, because of talking about my girlfriend

and we doing that, I had a few things. I want to relay a few things that my girlfriend has accidentally said. Just quick, Sammy, you can speak in these parts if you like. No, I've gone into a state of shock when you mentioned the words, the tan. It's been a good 12 years since my school bust my skinny chicken frame up in the city of Melbourne and made me run like a bitch. Sammy doesn't want to get involved in any of these weight loss things. He's sitting on 45 kilograms at the moment.

I went to school opposite the Tans, so we had to do it all the time. And I enjoy it now, but man, I hated it at the time. Just so much. When they had these school races, you'd start in the age group, so it's like 12 to 15, 15 to 18 or whatever, and then the open field and then the over 35s. And I was at this stage, like the 15-year-old group, and I got lapped by the next one along and then lapped again by the open field and finally lapped three times over,

meaning two other races. Three races had started before I'd finished mine, but I got lapped by the dudes in their 50s who just wanted to have a jog around the town. Yeah, I got all that stuff. Were you carrying your keyboard? Yeah, I was. And Angus Kennett as well.

Well, speaking of that, there was a dude at my school in my year level who was actually like quite a fit dude, but he just didn't like, because we had to do like all the house running and stuff. And he was like real kind of one of those guys like at a private school who's like, nah, F the system, man. I don't want to play your house athletics games. So he's rocked up to run the tan for house running once with a big boom box and just ran around in his Ray-Bans playing regurgitator and just took

as long as he could. It was a sensational effort. Yeah. Yeah, getting back to training with a girlfriend. I'll have conversations with her, and I've got a notebook on me all the time just in case she says something stupid, and then I immediately write it down. Then she immediately goes, no, no, you're not using that.

You're not going to say that. You should just wear a wire at all times so we can play excerpts on the show. Yes, I should get wired. It should be constantly a stakeout. Like the idea of you and your girlfriend getting into bed at night and just you forgetting and taking your shirt off and just the cord sticking tape to your chest. What was that? Speaking to my nipple again.

Well, I think it was one night, two nights ago when I was watching, I was watching Beatle clips on YouTube in bed. It's pronounced Beetlejuice anyway. Go on. Right. Okay. The Beatles clips on YouTube. And I was watching them and going, oh, you know, there's only...

Getting reminded of the lovely evening we spent at Cirque du Soleil's Love. Oh, yeah, that was awesome. Yes, I was reminded of that. Oh, that was great. I remember that. Yeah. The tan. Yeah.

So I was watching that and Diane, my girlfriend, said, oh, yeah, there's only a couple of them alive now, aren't there? And I went, yeah, because immediately my ears prick up because whenever someone shows ignorance towards the Beatles, to me, the Beatles are something that everyone knows and everyone should know. Everyone should have a reasonable grasp of Beatles history. I just think it's the right thing for everyone to do. It's like when you meet people who say that they've never seen Seinfeld

and you're like, how do you avoid that? It's just there all the time around you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like they've mastered one part of the world. Like they go down in world history. You should know who they are and what they are and what they've done and whatever. So she's faltered a tiny bit. So I've gone in for the kill and gone.

She's gone, oh, some of them aren't alive. And I went, I don't reckon you know who they are. I went, so who were alive? Who's dead? And she's like, oh, you know, John Lennon. And I went, so who were alive? Who's dead? And she's like, oh, you know, John Lennon. And I went, oh, who's alive then? She went, oh, you know. And I went, no, you tell me who's alive.

And she went, oh, you know, Rizzo. No, not the members of Grease that are still alive. I was going to say, isn't that the name of the rat from The Muppets? Wasn't that one of the pink ladies from Grease? Along with McCartney, obviously. To be honest, I was hoping it was going to be her going, Mick and Keith.

I really thought that was where that was going to go. I was just hoping she was going to cock her leg and produce an answer. Also, I think she was having a crack at my hair the other night. She's got a very porcelain sort of skin. She's got very nice skin. But she had a couple of pimples on her head the other day.

And she had a crack in my hair. And I went, oh, well, what about that then? And I pointed at them. And she said, what, that? My head's just a bit curvaceous. That's good. You call pimples, I've never heard that, you call pimples curves? Yeah, but what's your comeback to that?

You've got none. No, no, no, I was like, yeah, yeah, no, I was fine with that. I like, I mean, I've never heard that. All right, just someone with acne is just very curvy. That's not a fair playing field, though. If someone's going your hair, you can't then just go another. You've got to take them on on their same playing field. Do you? I reckon.

You can start a new battle. Yeah, exactly. Your hair's dumb. Oh, well? I reckon. You can start a new battle. Yeah, exactly. Your hair's dumb. Oh, well, both of your parents died in a car accident. Yeah, but because your hair was dumb. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like they were mortified. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

If I had a bit of food around my mouth and someone was missing an arm, I'm going to go for that. I'm going to say, hey, what about your arm? Where's the food on that? Oh, you don't have one. You've got to go what's going to get them. Sure. Okay. Fair enough. What was the complaint about your arm? Where's the food on that? Oh, you don't have one. You've got to go, what's going to get them? Sure. Okay.

Fair enough. What was the complaint about your hair? I don't know. Probably. We could come up with a few if you want. Go for it. And the other thing I found very funny was, this is a story she told me. One of her girlfriends, and it has to do with that actually,

one of her girlfriends went to dinner the other night and they went, they were sitting too close to this mantelpiece and there was like candles on the mantelpiece and the table's right next to the mantelpiece and this girl had quite long hair and she's like eating dinner and she's gradually edging over and her hair catches fire as she's eating dinner. Her hair goes up and while her hair's going up, instead of going, oh, you know,

instead of screaming, going, someone help me or whatever, this is what she said. She goes, ah, but my hair is my thing. That's good. Oh, wow. That's spectacular. Yeah. My hair is my thing.

I just imagined my hair is my thing. Oh, okay. I'll get water. Maybe she actually had really dull hair, but only in that moment could she claim that her hair was her thing because it was this flaming, beautiful mess. She's just looking at herself in the mirror going, man, I wish my hair could just be like this all the time.

Yeah, yeah. My hair's my thing. My girlfriend's just like you, her pimples didn't catch fire. Well, guys, that does bring us to the end of the show for another week. Sammy J, thank you so much for joining us. It has been an absolute pleasure. It's been great fun. Thank you very much.

People can catch you and Randy doing your new show at all the festivals coming up. Tickets on sale. Tickets on sale. Yeah, they're pretty much all on sale. Sydney and Adelaide and Melbourne and hopefully a couple other cities as well. Yeah, get on board. If you're in any of those cities and you're one of the few people that hasn't seen a Sammy J and Randy festival show, do go because it's always, you're like. If you're in any of those cities and you're one of the few people that hasn't seen a Sammy J and Randy Festival show,

do go, because it's always, you're like the Cirque du Soleil of comedy. There's always, it's such a production, there's always so much going on. And you're doing a B-roll show this year. Yes, here we are.

Yeah, I can't recommend their shows highly enough, so go check that out. Carl Chandler, you are going to be in Adelaide. I'm in Adelaide with friend of the show, Nick Cody.

Oh, excellent. On Tuesday, January... What's the date? Jesus Christ. It'll be Tuesday, January the 17th. Yeah, sure. Through to the 20th. Yeah?

Yeah. Adelaide Comedy. AdelaideComedy.com. Yep, get on. Get on, go check that Comedy. AdelaideComedy.com. Yep. Get on. Get on. Go check that out. T-shirts, CDs, books.

Send us an email. LittleDumbDumbClub at gmail.com. Or any general correspondence. Yes. We're on Twitter and Facebook. Keep the iTunes review. The next iTunes review we get is going to be lucky number 50. So get that on there.

We will see you next time. Thanks very much for listening. See you, mates.