The Luke and Pete Show - Episode 81: The It's Been World Record
Episode Date: July 16, 2018We start today's proceedings by talking about a one hour documentary on Japanese trains, including men fashioning a light fitting 'the old fashioned way', whatever that means. It's not as boring as it... sounds though, and before you know it we've moved on to camel urine anyway, so that's a plus.Elsewhere on your all-new episode of The Luke and Pete Show, there's more sodium-based tom foolery, actors that didn't act more than once and a big end-of-show finale as Pete attempts a physical and mental feat that any sane man wouldn't even consider...To contribute: hello@lukeandpeteshow.com***Please take the time to rate and review us on iTunes or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
What a crisp drum sound that track has. Finger clicks. It's like clicky, isn't it? Click, click, click.
How you doing? It's Pete Donaldson here and Luke Moher and we collectively together.
Can you be collective if you're two people?
I don't know.
Either way, it's Luke and Pete Shaw.
Welcome to it.
And you are welcome to it.
Hello.
All right.
You're not allowed to talk.
That was a bit of a monologue from you, Pete.
I was just enjoying it.
Just enjoying it.
Listen, just enjoy watching a master at work.
Professional.
I say professional sometimes because there was two kids on a train and I think they were
a bit, they were silly boys.
But one of them had said, oh, my phone is broken.
And the other one had a skateboard, and he went, gives it here.
And he got the phone, and he smashed it against the trucks on his skateboard.
And the other kid went, oh, you fixed it.
And the other one went, professional.
So every time I hear somebody say professional, I go, professional.
Do you need a hard reset because that sounded like
the sort of
one of those
generate
buzz feed
generating meme
stories of the day
I think you're breaking down too
yeah I don't know
it's too hot in here isn't it
watching you then
do the intro to that show
Pete was a bit like
it was like watching
a master in action
it was like when
you know in the
Sunday night
Sunday evening
popular BBC show Countryfile where they'll go to the middle of nowhere It was like watching a master in action. It was like when, you know, in the Sunday night, Sunday evening,
popular BBC show, Countryfile, where they'll go to the middle of nowhere and say, this guy here with the moustache and the dungarees on,
he's the country's last ever barrel maker.
Yeah.
And then he'll make a barrel.
Yeah.
And then everyone will go, God, that's a master at work.
That's what it was like watching you.
It's a dying art.
If you're ever,
obviously I do the podcast at Abroad in Japan,
so I have the NHK,
which is the BBC of Japan,
their app installed on my television.
So occasionally,
for some whatever reason,
I'll turn on the telly
and NHK will just be on.
Is it Japanese language?
There's no software?
No, no, no.
So it's all English.
It's all in English.
It's basically like the World Service,
but it's Japanese, basically.
So they run documentaries about master craftsmen, Japanese master craftsmen.
And basically, this guy designed this incredible train.
I think it was called the King's Train or something like that.
And it was this beautiful kind of plush Orient Express kind of situation.
But it was the body of an old crappy train that nobody liked anymore.
And basically, these guys had to make
this very particular part of a light.
And it was an hour-long documentary
by these men making this bent bit of metal
fit the original train situation.
And they didn't have any plans for it.
They just had a drawing to work from.
And basically they admitted halfway through
that this could have been done with computers
really quickly.
But these guys went, but we want to do it the proper way.
And they fucked it up so many times,
they don't even want to get into it.
Is it boring?
But all the way through, they were just ringing their bosses
and apologising in a very kind of earnest way,
as the Japanese do, because it's all about honour
and respect and all that stuff.
So they were basically, it was like Challenge Anika,
but they had to finish this little bit of golden metal.
And every time they bent the metal in the ship, they had to get theika, but they had to finish this little bit of golden metal. And every time they bent the metal into shape,
they had to get the strongest man on the team
to bend this metal physically into a shape.
And then they'd have to buff it again and get it gold-plated.
And, oh, man, it was a right old rigmarole.
It went on for an hour.
It went on for an entire hour, like the story about it, really.
But I recommend watching NHK.
It's very relaxing.
And also... Must have one in the background. A bit like the Good Food channel, like I was talking about last. It's very relaxing. And also...
Must have one in the background.
A bit like the Good Food channel.
Definitely.
Definitely.
Get the NHK app.
Until James Martin comes on your channel.
They had...
They don't have many English speakers to do the voices.
Like the charismatic voices of the engineers.
Get your agent on it.
I know, right?
Yeah, you've just been dropped from another one of those.
You've got loads of time. All Alright, I did it for eight years.
You know, that's a long time
in continuity. As it said
in the letter, it's run its course.
It's run its course. Actually, I was the last
D-Max announcer, so
I went down with the ship. Do a country farthing
on it. A dying breeze.
The last continuity answer on Discovery.
Yeah, and
these guys do it, they got like the,
you remember like Eurotrash
back in the 80s?
Oh, big time.
Whenever they would have
like a,
it would be like a guy
who does pig impressions
in France or something.
Yeah.
Or Versailles or something.
And it'd be like,
oh, this man can do
a lot of impressions of pigs.
And the guy might go,
oh yes,
I've been doing a pig impression
for ages.
It's kind of like that
they're like the engineers
like this really
cam boss
they're not going
oh I'm going to bend
the metal into a right shape now
they always used to
on Eurotrash
they would always get
a really over the top
translator
to undermine the whole thing
and that thing
you're talking about there
like a Frenchman
doing an impression
of different pigs
was a part of content
which I used to refer to as
the filler bit
before you see another naked lady.
Yes, definitely.
Because that's the only reason
any adolescent man
was watching that show.
Get Lola Ferrari back on.
I think we spoke about it
on the show.
She died now, I think.
She's dead.
Recently on Luke and Pete,
I should give people
a little round up.
First of all,
lots of people, Pete,
interested in a sunburn update
from you.
You're back fighting fit now,
are you not?
I'm back fighting fit now, are you not?
I'm back fighting fit.
Doing okay.
It's now recovered, though.
I am in day four or five of a rather barren patch for the old pooples.
Oh, dear.
And you've talked about this on the show,
so it's not me being gauche or rude.
It's like back 2012,
when you only had three in the whole year.
I went to find some tablets to help the process go along.
Sunacot?
No, there's two different kinds of poopies.
There's stuff that softens the stool,
and there's stuff that just gives the whole system a kick,
like a cup of coffee or a big heavy cigarette.
Or a fig.
Or a fig, or a line of cocagna.
Stop it.
And so I always go for the latter.
Not the cocaine.
I mean the tablets that rush it along physically.
You get the muscles moving, so to speak.
I've got a lazy gut, clearly.
And I found some tablets.
I had about three of them.
I realised they went out of nick in 2009.
Oh, dear.
That's a long time ago.
Yeah.
So what's going to happen next?
It might come out my mouth,
I don't know.
I don't know.
2009,
I don't know.
If you've got any tips,
hello at LukeandPeteShow.com.
Maybe some exercises
Pete can do.
He spent too long
in his youth
on all fours
with his butt butt
up in the air
trying to suck air
into the pumps
and now it's come back
to bite him.
Other things we were
talking about,
oh here's one Pete,
I've embarrassed myself here, so it's only
fair that I come clean.
The secret chocolate
bar.
Remember we talked
about that?
Yes, yes, yes.
Well, I sent an email
to Cadbury's about it
and then said, can I
please come around
the factory as well?
And have a look at
the bits and bobs.
Well, they flat
battered me away.
Turns out the reason
they flat battered me
away is because the
secret bar was made by Nestle. Oh, no. Why didn't they tell you that, though? Theybattered me away. Turns out the reason they flat-battered me away is because the secret bar was made by Nestle.
Oh, no.
Why didn't they tell you that, though?
They should know the history.
More accurately, Roundtree.
Remember Roundtree?
Yes.
Which was eventually bought out by Nestle.
Hang on.
So Roundtree's fruit pastels are not made by Roundtree.
They're made by Nestle.
I think Nestle owns them now.
What?
Yeah, I think so.
That's a buyout.
So I've made a bit of a dickhead of myself there.
We talked a bit about those guys that almost blew up an entire school.
More on that.
That was so violent.
I was so into that story.
I've got more on that.
What a mess.
We also did, Pete, names that you wouldn't call a baby in 2018.
Eric.
Yeah, Eric wasn't one, was it?
I'm having it, though.
Could be now.
Yeah.
was it i'm having it though could be now eric yeah um the most robust fast food um in terms of how it would stay together if you if you dropped it from a height or whatever and also uh bringing
animals into the studio something we haven't done this week but we can't rule out in the future long
egg the long egg as well of course and if you want to get in touch about any of those subjects
it is of course hello at lukeandpeachshow.com.
Speaking about those guys that almost blew up an entire school,
if you don't remember or you haven't listened to that episode yet,
that was basically to do with them stealing, essentially, some sodium
or some sort of version of sodium, I suppose, from the science department.
And Ben Steele, a friend of mine and listener to the show, got in touch.
And he says the following.
The Luke and Peach Show story about the sodium exploding in the toilets.
My dad tells of how he used to work as a lab technician at a school.
And at the end of term, chucked a whole load of the same stuff off the pier at Skeg Ness.
Because the chemistry teacher couldn't think of a better way to get rid of it.
He claims they threw one in, nothing happened, so they thought it was fine,
and threw a load
more in
and then the first
one exploded
because it must have
taken some time
for the oil to wash off.
He said yeah.
He said the 80s
just sound ridiculous.
I'd love to have been
like a fly on the wall
when that conversation
happened.
Why did you get rid
of that though?
What were we going
to do with it?
Well,
not that far
from the sea are we?
Was the school
shutting down?
Why did they have to
get rid of the sodium
it sounds like the scene
from is it crocodile dundee
where there's a dynamite
in the lake
and all the fish come up
incredible
yeah so there you go
any more sodium based
stories do get in touch
but yeah look
to go back to the secret thing
it's a regret of mine
I've embarrassed myself there
because if there's one thing
I like to think I know about
yeah
chocolate bars would be up there
and I didn't even realise that it wasn't a Cadbury's a Cadbury's bar so there we go
that's all right I mean you should assume that with uh you just assume that Cadbury's make all
the chocolate bars yeah I think so anyway I agree that's right oh dear um shall we do some emails
is that kind of like the state of play yeah we've got loads we've got loads of emails recently about things
I've just mentioned there
but we'll get to them
in sort of
an order
due process
yeah because we can't
otherwise we end up
missing ones out
and we don't get through
the ones we want to get through
so be patient
if you've sent one in
about some of those subjects
we will get to them
and we always have a little bit
of inertia
so just bear with us
but after this quick break
we'll have some emails
thank you Pete
so Sheikh
you're telling me that drinking camel's urine is part of the thing?
Ach, you don't get me wrong.
Don't get him wrong.
Don't get me wrong.
I've got an email about camel urine.
What?
I don't know.
Have you actually?
Yeah, I have, yeah.
We are email.
Right.
This one is from John Spooner.
Spoonzo!
Hit him off your leg, make a little song.
Isn't that a Soundgarden song?
And this email is ostensibly about camel urine,
but listen to the final sentence as well.
So if you're listening at home, take it in, embrace it, enjoy it.
It's about camel urine, but there's a nice little payoff at home, take it in, embrace it, enjoy it. It's about camel urine,
but there's a nice little payoff
at the end.
I don't want you to miss it.
John Spooner says,
about 10 years ago,
I enjoyed a couple of
walking holidays
in the Sahara.
Right.
Did you just get dropped?
And you had to just
make your way across
the Sahara?
John, were you lost in the Sahara?
I think you'll find
it was a walking holiday.
Why have you got no clothes on?
The wanderlust of wandering in the Sahara.
If it was a walking holiday, John, presumably you're not thirsty.
Yeah.
No, I'm not thirsty, actually. I don't want any of that water.
He says, while we trot along, our gear was carried by camels.
Camels, as is well known, have a huge capacity for storing liquid
and take every opportunity they can to take on more water.
Yes.
What is less well known is that they take on more water than they can carry,
and immediately expel the excess from their bodies.
Ah.
By a process which I can no longer recall, a swishing towel perhaps,
the urine is converted into a fine spray,
so that cooling mist you experience in the desert heat can be camel urine.
No.
So if there's one thing I've learnt in life, he says,
it's never to follow a camel too closely when leaving an oasis listen to the payoff my batteries in my hotel hotel room last night were
dead at uracels so to make it work i got the batteries from my head torch that were and get
this because a new player has entered the game handy heroes handy heroes have you ever heard of a battery called a handy hero
that's wonderful because it isn't a play on cell or power or anything like that they're handy and
i help you out handy heroes amazing battery chat that yeah that's top draw battery very english
and handy's not uh an international english word you know what i mean because most of these
batteries are just rebranded i imagine you said the word handy to a lot of foreign speaking people
handy hero
can I have a handy hero please
why is it when I'm
gosh you go
Peter
I think I've got
I sort of
bring a veil of
respectability about it
no I'm not having it
one of our iTunes reviews said
Luke does his best
to keep this show
out of the gutter
yeah
which I guess is sort of true
and I drop sodium into it
bringing the gutter to you in many ways absolutely right sort of true. And I drop sodium into it,
bringing the gutter to you in many ways.
Absolutely right.
So have you got anything to add on the camel urine thing?
I don't think I've ever been close to a camel.
We used to have a couple of Bactrian camels in the zoo.
I prefer a dromedary, I think.
Which are, they're two, no, one hump is Bactrian. Dromedary is two humps.
I think they're based around East Asia,
sort of Mongolia around there.
Lovely looking animals. When they're mistreated East Asia, Mongolia, around there. Lovely-looking animals.
When they're mistreated, they can look a bit sad
because their humps kind of sag a little bit.
But the problem with that is, and as you well know by now,
I'm not an expert, if they're being well looked after
and they're getting fed and watered essentially whenever they want it,
do they need the big hump?
Good point.
There you go.
Animals only, you know, people talk about the cruelty of zoos and i agree i don't think they should exist uh except for um
keeping animals that would otherwise die uh from from living um but animals invariably
only move on and need a lot of room because they've exhausted the food supply. And if the food's in regular supply, they don't move.
So I think all animals should have been cages for the rest of their lives.
A lot of zoos are educational, sort of studying type things for people, right?
You can study.
Nowadays, you can study from videos and stuff.
You don't have to be right there, do you?
No, of course you do.
You can't put your hand up a camel's butt on a video, can you?
What zoo allowed you to do that, you deviant?
Your one.
I always think it's ironic.
Ten quid.
Glory Hall.
Camel Glory Hall.
Don't mind the mist.
Don't spray the urine.
I always think it's ironic when we talk about zoos,
which comes up a lot when we're actually sat in a box
with a window at the front.
Essentially, it's like a human zoo.
We just watched...
Guaranteed, a couple of you will be familiar with the photo of Amal.
We just watched Marcus Speller try to reconnect a HDMI cable to a PlayStation 4.
Hasn't managed it and has just left the building.
He's that annoyed with it.
He just left the building.
He is the archetypal sort of duck on top of the water.
Very smooth, but underneath the legs are whirring around.
Wow.
I don't know who's enjoyed that more.
Us looking out at them doing it or them looking in going, I don't know what I'm doing. I like that they just downed tools and left. No, rather than going. I don't want who's enjoyed that more. Us looking out at them doing it, or them looking in going,
I don't know what I'm doing.
I like that they're just down tools and left.
No, rather than going,
I don't want to play that much.
I'd rather go home.
I'm not wasting an afternoon on this.
Oh, man.
Chris in Sheffield.
Hello to Chris in Sheffield.
Oh, no, wait a minute.
No, what I've done is,
speaking of which,
I'm like I've appended Ramble emails
to the top of the Look and Picture.
Look and Picture, Steve Barron.
Hopefully a relation to Steve Bannon.
No, I like that Steve Barron comes along so quickly
after an email about the Sahara, which of course is Barron.
Good point.
Probably isn't Barron, actually.
No, people have got to live there, haven't they?
Barry's Pop, Boring Panasonic, thank you.
I've just listened to episode 78.
I thought I might add to your list of child actors
who never acted again
Carrie Henn
who played Newt
in Aliens
excellent
they come at night mostly
oh it's a great performance
they come at night mostly
after that iconic role
she never acted before
or after that role
she was asked to act
in Alien fan film
an Alien ant film
sorry
Alien farm
she was the front man
in Alien ant farm
she was asked to act in Alien Ant Farm.
She was asked to act in an alien fan film, but 20th Century
Fox put a stop to that. She now works as a school teacher
in California.
You see that a lot in video games, a lot of
fan mods and
fan games that people put together with
obviously IP that doesn't belong to
them. Sometimes the
companies involved are quite
benevolent. They'll let them just get
on with it and play with their IP a little bit.
Most of them very much do not. Nintendo being
a notable exception to that one.
I really like that Carrie Henn has got
six credits in IMDb
for her career. One, Aliens
of course. The other five,
video documentaries about aliens.
Nice, I like that one a lot.
That's an interesting point because that is a fantastic film. Nice. I like that one a lot. That's a really interesting point
because that is a fantastic film.
Now, people of an older generation...
Is that the one where she gets the robot arms,
like the lifting arms and stuff?
Yeah.
That exoskeleton thing.
Get away from her, you bitch.
You'll stay away from her, you bitch.
It's the second one in the series.
I like all three.
I like the first three anyway.
But anyway, people of my parents generation
will always tell you
the first one's the best one
right
because it's like a thriller
it's a horror
you never see the alien
it's a suspense thing
but for me
I came into the party
watching Aliens
as my first one
which of course
is this great
like James Cameron
allegory for the Vietnam War
and there's a lot of action
and there's a lot of
great lines in it
and Newt is brilliant in it
and for me
that's the strongest one
right but to think that she was in such a prominent field a James Cameron movie and there's a lot of great lines in it and Newt is brilliant in it. And for me, that's the strongest one.
But to think that she was in such a prominent field,
a James Cameron movie, massive budget,
huge stars, did really well.
It's rated as one of the best films or one of the best sort of, I guess,
whatever you'd call it, sci-fi action,
thriller films of all time, really.
Yet she's never appeared in anything again.
Do we know why that is?
Why she didn't want to?
Did she not want to?
Did she not get any more work?
I don't know.
I just think people just kind of,
I think it's enormously difficult for child actors
to break out of that particular,
they've kind of got to go away and then come back again.
No, but they get other opportunities.
Yeah, but you get typecast.
As a child actor, you get typecasters
playing the same kind of role over and over again.
I always think with child actors,
they never need to be that good.
And when they're really good,
you're like, oh, wow, yeah, you've got some chops. Child actors don't necessarily need to be that good. And when they're really good, you're like, oh, wow, yeah, you've got some chops.
Child actors don't necessarily need to be that good.
No, that's right. I think when you get a couple of child
actors who are genuinely good, and I'm thinking Stranger Things
kids here, it's really surprising.
Yeah, and I think when they're
good,
they're either
just normal kids who happen to
have a little bit of choppery, and then
there's the stage school kids who are really precautionary. You're like, no, I don't like you at all. Or there's just people who are just fucking brilliant, and they're happen to be have a little bit of choppery uh and then there's like the stage school kids are really kind of precaution you're like no i don't like you at all oh there's just
people who just fucking brilliant and they're gonna be actors for the rest of their lives
those stranger thing kids a lot of them are stage school kids i think maybe one of them
was in lima's arrival something like that right tell people when you talk about chops and when
you talk about choppery what do you mean like having a propensity to be able to do it chops
acting chops chops out have you got podcast chops?
God, no.
I do enough of them,
so I should.
I'm hoping to gain some.
What sort of brand of chops
have you got?
I am...
Goodness me!
Really good at buying wires.
Yeah, that's true.
You've got good wire buying...
Wire buyer.
Wire purchasing chops.
Oh, wire buyer!
I'm very good...
My chops,
I'm very good at...
Essentially,
I think I've got to the point now in my Sainsbury's local
where I
where I have tried
every single
different brand
of not just crisps
but biscuits as well
is that
chops
have you
literally chops
have you
have you
flirted with the
the Patix product
in the
International Isle
no
no
not gone for the
you know I love
those
I think they're maize
or corn based
kind of snacks
they're a little bit like skips
but they're spicy
kind of
oh yeah
International Isle
International Isle
things I like
you'll occasionally get it
in kind of Brixton area
Bigger Juice
which is a really strong
tropical drink
it's too sugary for me
that stuff.
It's incredible, though.
It's something else.
I put on a lot of weight during the mid-noughties when I was drinking a lot of bigger juice.
I was getting two or three bigger juices a day.
You're still getting them?
It's beautiful tropical punch.
Can you still find them?
Yeah, you can still buy bigger juices.
What flavours are we talking about?
Just the usual kind of Jamaican fruit punch kind of flavours, but it's strong.
If you ever get the chance to indulge in a bit of a bigger juice,
but it's weird in,
in kind of like,
um,
in that aisle,
you'll always get bigger juice,
but you also get super malt as well.
Super malt's one of those drinks where I've indulged,
I flirted with it,
but I just can't get my head around it.
I just can't.
My brain can't process the flavour.
Yeah.
I'm,
I'm trying my best to kind of,
it's like Guinness without the booze.
It's like,
yeah,
I can't,
my brain finds it very hard to process things that to my brain should be sweet, but
are in fact savoury.
My next door neighbours are absolutely lovely.
The lady, she made carrot courgette and cheese muffins.
Okay.
Yeah.
That would work, wouldn't it?
But to me, a muffin is a sweet thing.
So my brain's expecting something sweet.
A muffin's a sweet thing. Oh,'s expecting something sweet a muffin's a sweet thing
oh oh
the sweetest thing
yeah
can we go back to
child actors really quickly
alright
because Danny Lloyd
of The Shining
remember we talked about him
yeah
he was actually in
one other thing
so we
I think we mentioned
that he
he was only in
The Shining in 1980
wasn't the making of
The Shining no
no it was
it was this weird TV movie
a couple of years later
but did I say to you I might have done apologies if I did that they they worked really hard making The Shining, no? No, it was this weird TV movie a couple of years later.
But did I say to you,
I might have done,
apologies if I did,
that they worked really hard to shoot his scenes
in a way that he didn't realise
he was in a horror movie
because they were worried about him.
Yeah, yeah.
I mean, it's hard to dress up that lift.
Why is Jack Nicholson looking like that?
That's what I've been thinking.
Why does he get on hacks?
Yeah, he's eight years old at this point.
Have you seen the videos of him
trying to get crazy
in one of the rooms
yeah it's great
suffering 75
yeah it's brilliant
warming up for it
so you know
that's really interesting
because you know
this idea of acting
the method form of acting
where you become that person
so Daniel Day-Lewis
or whatever
he never comes out
of character on set
I love the quote
it's not very tedious
I love the quote
from Laurence Olivier
I think it was Laurence Olivier
who when he was asked about it and why he didn't do that he was like it's all very tedious I love the quote from Laurence Olivier I think it was Laurence Olivier who when he was
asked about it
and why he didn't
do that
he was like
it's called acting
you're supposed to act
it was Dustin Hoffman
I think we spoke about
this on the show
before where
Dustin Hoffman
ran around
he had to pretend
he was out of breath
so he ran around
the block a couple
of times
and I think he was
acting with
the aforementioned
actor
yeah
the marathon man
it was
he said what are it was he said
he said what are you doing
he said I need to be out of breath
he's going
why don't you do some acting
here boy
why don't you do some acting
lovely
lovely stuff
so what email were we doing then
I've forgotten
oh
oh Newt
we did Newt
Steve Barons
yeah go on
would you want to do another one
or should I do one
I'll stick in a double
do you want a quick one
I'll smash out a quick one you do one here because I've got a quick. Do you want a quick one? I'll smash out a quick one.
You do one here
because I've got a quick one
for you after.
Okay.
Please keep me anonymous.
I use my pseudonym
Dan Gleeballs.
I'm currently in the vicinity
of boring energiser batteries.
I work on the London Underground
and spent eight years
as an engineer on nights,
spending shift after shift
on the track
and down the tunnels
maintaining signal equipment
and fault finding.
A job that I cannot imagine. It could be made easy by any stretch of the imagination.
Watch out for those shower curtains.
Watch out for those shower curtains.
In episode 78, you were talking about rats found in the tunnels
and whether or not the rumours of dog-slash-cat-sized rodents lurk beneath the rails.
To put it simply, bullshit.
The biggest I've seen is no larger than your average adult male's hand span.
Is that a conspiracy?
Yeah, dangly balls.
That's exactly the sort of thing I'd expect someone to say
who was actually secretly breeding a load of super-sized rats.
That's why he was kept anonymous,
because he's breeding alpaca-sized rats.
He was to be kept anonymous because his rats are so big and so advanced,
they've all got iPhones now,
and he doesn't want to hear his name to blow the experiment.
I think most of the rats are off to Canary Wharf, yeah?
Huh.
Yeah.
Rat race.
Rat race.
I told you about Morning Sheep.
Morning Sheep.
Morning Sheep.
I wish he was still about.
He's almost certainly passed away.
Yeah.
Good stuff from Dan Gleable.
Thanks, Dan.
What about this from David Pete?
David, Pete. His name isn from David Pete David comma Pete
not his name
isn't David Pete
he says
hello lads
I'm at first duty
bound to inform you
that my TV remote
is boasting a pairing
of Philips
and a rather exciting
V2 extreme power battery
it is now to my matter
at hand
I'm going out
on a whim here
is that the term
no it's going out
on a limb
David's let himself
down there
although he has
spelt the word
whim properly,
so good for him.
I'm going to suggest that I speak for many a listener
who has tuned in since last summer's episode one
when I ask,
whatever happened to Donnie Sterling
bare naked ladies impressions?
I found myself doing it the other day
and it made me realise we'd not heard it for a while.
I therefore ask that Pete gives us a rendition
for old time's sake.
Now, before I get into that,
I was in the kitchen yesterday.
Surprise.
Yeah.
My phone room.
My wife was making meatball subs for dinner.
Delicious.
And I was helping out, I think.
And we had Absolute Radio on.
Right.
Which is a parish you are a very much a key member of.
Treasurer, probably.
Treasurer.
I'm on everywhere.
And you played
Bare Naked Ladies
and then afterwards
you did The Impression
I did The Impression
not good enough
for these fucking listeners
is it
but it's good enough
for them
you've taken it
mainstream
David your answer is
Pete Donaldson
has taken it
mainstream
I get paid
a small amount
of money
to do that show
it's a
pre-recorded show
which I do
relatively quickly
I've got quite good at it that's. I've got quite good at it.
That's what I've got quite good at.
I find that very hard to believe.
You've got chops.
You've got absolute radio chops.
Doing three-hour radio shows in upwards of,
well, downwards of seven minutes.
And, yeah, I think because of the nature of the fact
that the 90s is over,
there can't be any new music that's produced.
And obviously...
This is Absolute Radio 90. Absolute Radio 90. So there's no new music coming out of the 90s is over there can't be any new music that's produced uh and obviously so there's no new music coming out of the 90s effectively you can find a little bit some
bobbies you can we should do a feature called haven't heard it for ages where we play a song
that you don't get here on the radio very often and that's always nice but the normal absolute
radio night is you ain't gonna get a new song so um i've kind of exhausted all of my stories about
every song so i'm having to kind of diversify a little bit.
Bare Naked Ladies, I had nothing.
So I just went, it's been.
That was all right, actually.
Yeah.
So do you practice it behind, keep your eye in sort of thing?
What do you mean?
Well, the same way that Gary Lincoln said the other day
that he used to do 50 penalties a day in case he got one at the weekend.
Oh, really?
And he would do a different one each time.
So he'd say, right, what I mean by that is he'd say,
today I'm going to practice, I'm going to do my 50 penalties
and I'm going to put them in the top right corner.
And whatever he had practiced, he would put in practice
in the game, right?
Do you do that with your it spin?
Do you do 50 a day to keep yourself going?
No, I think it's such a short thing.
I could probably do 50 in a minute.
I'm not going to. Let's make that very clear. I'm afraid you fucking know. Right, how many it spins such a short thing. I could probably do 50 in a minute. I'm not going to.
Let's make that very clear.
Oh, I'm afraid you fucking know.
Right, how many it spins can you do in a minute?
I'm going to time you now.
Let me get my timer out.
You can do 50.
I'm going to try 50.
So I'll time it and I'll count.
Right.
Bear with me a second.
I've got to get my stopwatch out.
All right.
If you can count, that'd be cool.
I'll count them, don't worry.
You just do as many as you can.
All right?
Do you know what I'll do?
I'll do it on timer so it counts down. Yeah, okay. Ready? I'll count them, don't worry. You just do as many as you can. All right? Do you know what I'll do? I'll do it on timer, so it counts down.
Yeah, okay.
Ready?
I'll count you in.
They've got to be of requisite quality.
Okay.
Okay?
And go.
It's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been,
it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been,
it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, binnets, binnets, binnets, binnets, binnets. It's binnets,
binnets, binnets, binnets, binnets,
binnets, binnets, binnets. How long have I lived?
It's binnets, binnets,
20 seconds! Fuck me!
It's binnets, binnets, binnets, binnets,
binnets, binnets, binnets, binnets,
binnets, binnets, binnets, binnets,
binnets, binnets, binnets, binnets,
binnets, binnets, binnets, binnets,
binnets, binnets, binnets, binnets,
binnets, binnets, binnets, binnets, binnets, binn been, it's been, it's been, it's been. It's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been.
It's been, it's been, it's been, it's been.
It's been, it's been, it's been, it's been, it's been.
That's the end.
Oh.
I must have nailed 50 there.
Easily.
Easily.
Hello, Luke and Peter, if you're counting, because I lost my mind.
Pete's neck. Your neck, then. It looked like you were going to have a heart attack. That's Luca Pichov. You're counting because I lost my mind. Pete's neck.
Your neck, then.
It looked like you were going to have a heart attack.
That's where it comes from.
The power's all in the neck, like a Ronaldo header.
So I think that they were probably all of the requisite quality
we were after as well.
You kept it up.
Well, after a while, when you repeat anything for any length of time,
it's spin it, spin it, spin it, spin it, spin it, spin it.
It's like when you hear somebody
says
I've got an
anti-lil
now if you say
anti-lil
it sounds like
little
and once you
hear anti-lil
you can't hear it
again
little
little
it's like when
someone talks to
you about how
often you blink
or whatever
you can't stop
blinking
if you are
listening to that
still
apologies for my
corpsing.
And you did count,
or you can replay it and count back.
Hello at LukeandPete.com to see how many.
I think Pete was well over 50 in a minute.
Easily well over 50.
You forget how long a second is sometimes, I think.
I think one thing doing radio...
When it comes to the bedroom.
Radio and podcasting and stuff
does teach you just how long 10 seconds is.
You can move quite a long distance in 10 seconds.
Yeah, massively. 10 seconds is a lot longer
than perhaps you think, but
if you can beat that, Pete's record.
We should get Norris McWhirter on for that.
He's dead, isn't he? Who got shot at the door by the IRA?
Was that Ross McWhirter?
Either him or his brother got shot
at the door by the IRA. I think Norris McWhirter
might have died old. Norris McWhirter was on record breakers.
Ross McWhirter was shot by the IRA.
I'm fairly certain that's the case.
So Norris McWhirter died in 2004, age 78.
Look under brother.
Okay, I will.
He died of a heart attack at his home in Wiltshire.
Who's the other one?
Ross.
Ross McWhirter.
I've never even heard of Ross McWhirter.
I can't remember why.
What was he known for?
I can't remember why he was shot. Oh, he was a
twin brother and he was a contributor.
He was murdered by the
Provisional IRA in 1975.
I knew it! Did not know that. Why did they
target him?
They wanted to break a record. Oh, he was a
Conservative Party activist. Maybe that's not
what did it. Who knows?
Let's not get into that. Let's not get into that.
Let's go. I I mean what I would say
is Luke
we've you know
I thought that was
a really good finish
me saying it's been
50 times
it's more than 50
I think you probably
got to about 70
you brought it down
with the provisional IRA
now haven't you
with your record chat
I always get you in the end
so is that all
we've got time for
this time around
yeah let's get over here mate
we've got things to do
I've got loads of good
emails for next time
I know you have
I'm looking forward to them
I've barely scratched the surface
because of your
your nonsense
you asked me to do it
hello at lucanpeachshaw.com
if you want to get in touch
and if you want your
shit read out
to be quite frank
we'll be back next week
with more
not next week
this Thursday
for more fun
and games
we'll see you then
see you later
see ya and games. We'll see you next time.