The Luke and Pete Show - Save me, Abraham!
Episode Date: February 6, 2023Pete’s been on holiday. Unfortunately, he didn’t see another pear but he did come face to face with the prospect of death. Yes, really. Poor Petey.Meanwhile, a listener experienced ...more weird behaviour at the hands of everyone’s favourite furniture store, and Luke’s delighted to find out the chat about bin men has made it all the way to America.Want to get in touch with the show? Email: hello@lukeandpeteshow.com or you can get in touch on Twitter or Instagram: @lukeandpeteshow Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Transcript
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all right it's luca pete short o'clock baby it is monday 6th of february my name is pete donaldson
and i'm joined by mr luki luki moore luki pukey moore you all right man how's it going how's it
going everyone i'm good you sound fire good. Fire alarms stopped going off now.
Subsiders.
I mean, it was on for two weeks.
Wow.
It didn't stop for two weeks.
And no one burned.
What have we learned?
Just don't listen to fire alarms.
I've taken all the smoke alarms out of my house.
Yeah.
Is that because they literally can't handle your smoke?
Because they were beeping away.
Beep, beep, beep every now and again.
And if it lost power, which for some reason a lot of the wires in my house do,
they would beep, beep, beep.
And the neighbours got annoyed, so I removed them.
And I've not seen fit to put them back.
And for me, that's a risk because I'm always setting fire to stuff.
Yeah.
If someone said to me,
which of the people you know would most benefit from a smoke alarm in their house,
I'd have you quite near the top of the list.
I would.
Next to arson jaw.
Next to chemical spill Brian.
Yeah.
Johnny arson probably top.
Yeah,
definitely.
And then,
yeah.
But Peter,
we have to let people behind the curtain a little bit and say that.
Like the fire retardant curtain.
Yeah,
exactly.
We,
we pre-react a couple of episodes, retardant curtain yeah exactly we pre-rect
a couple of episodes
which in the industry
we say pre-rect
because we're really cool
and it's like a secret society
what that means is
we recorded some episodes
in advance
because
young Peter here
young little Petey Pie
little Petey Poo
Petey Poppers
little Petels
Petey Poppers
went to
Costa Rica
on holiday
and he's just got back
and he
let me tell you now, listeners,
I am in a very, very unviewable position
because I can see just how tanned
his larger-than-average forehead is.
You were just commenting on the curvature of my forehead.
Have you got into that?
Is it phrenology where you study the shapes of the head?
I don't like people with small heads.
You are obsessed with that.
Those little Chinese kind of statues with the heads
with the little demarcations written on them in pen.
Like, what is good for the goose, good for the gander,
good for the feet?
I don't know.
I don't know what's going on.
This part is about, like, patience.
Yeah, patience, sexiness.
How sexy you are.
Does that mean, like, what part of the brain it is
or how bumpy your head is
is that how that kind of i'll be honest i think they've made it all up i think i think they have
made it all up yeah i got my hair cut earlier today and um my hairdresser who was lovely
screaming but you know in the words of lance stater from detectorist i've spent the majority
of my life trying to avoid the mystical and she is a bit more spiritual than i'm used to right so
she tells me a lot of things and one of the things that she is quite into is the old head thing
she'll give you a head massage when she's washing your hair which is very nice i'm very
grateful to receive that i know you hate that kind of thing but i quite like it
and then but you do get and i'm going to use this under advice because i don't want to come across
as disrespectful because i am a very appreciative
patron of that hair salon
but it is mumbo jumbo
and
I have to put up with it
every time I get my hair cut
so I know a bit more about it than I would like
But is it one of those kind of
interests that is kind of
progressing? Is she getting into
more and more different stuff like i
don't know tea reading tea leaves um like uh those mood rings you see in the night is it evolving
every time or is it the same thing over and over again could you see her getting more and more
extreme more into conspiracy theories possibly yeah more of that business she's putting the jet fuel um from september 11 on my hair yeah from tea
leaves to tea the party what i don't get is yeah what i don't get is why are they into all of it
yeah well yeah you'd think that you would specialize it like well i think if you're not
if you're into just one of the kind of mystical things i them. I think you, I mean, it's a bit rich
to sort of go,
well, I don't believe in tea leaves,
but I do believe in Ouija boards.
So you have to.
You kind of have to take,
you're in for a penny
and for a pound, I think.
You've got to be open
to all of those things.
You've got your Facebook photo
is now a sort of sepia drawing
of a wolf howling at a full moon.
We just, we,
just be Paris.
Yeah, with respect to troops. Yeah, respect to troops. Don't tread on me. But Peter, just, we, we Paris. Yeah.
With respect for troops.
Yeah.
Respect.
Don't tread on me.
But Peter,
anyway,
listen,
you went on holiday.
People are desperate to know whether you saw another pair in the ocean.
Didn't see a pair in the ocean.
You know what?
I saw,
it was a great holiday with many great memories from the,
the San, San Miguel?
No, some place in Costa Rica we went to that had a big national park.
So I saw a great many sloths and iguanas and spiders
and monkeys running around.
And from our little hotel room,
we saw loads of squirrel monkeys running around wow and it was
and it was just fucking brilliant from start to finish um i did almost die though all right uh
in the sea shit and um and the further away from it the more comfortable i am talking about it
but i'm still probably not as comfortable as I should be talking about it
on the Luke and Pete show.
Yeah, a lifeguard
helped me out of the water.
Shit! What happened?
He gave me his little red float and I floated
out and I swum out of
the big waves. You got Hasselhoffed?
Just big fucking waves, man.
I was having a lovely time and I was
and my last words would have been to Sarah,
check, I found a new way to swim through a wave, Sarah.
And I ran in and swam.
And then, and then, so it's quite,
they're quite big waves out there.
And I'm not an amazing swimmer, as you'll find out.
But the lifeguard was sort of like started whistling,
like, come back to sea, come back to shore.
How deep were you?
How deep was the water?
I mean, I couldn't touch the floor.
So your guess is as good as mine.
At least 4 foot 11 deep.
But these waves were like fucking 10 foot waves.
They were big old boys.
And I'm not familiar with big old boy waves
and I'm not a surfer and I'm not sort of...
And so the guy's sort of whistling.
Doot, doot, doot, doot.
And I was like, what does he want?
He's going, come back, come back to the shore.
What does whistle mean?
Does whistle mean sweet, sweet moods?
Does whistle mean American badass? Does whistle mean sweet, sweet moods? Does whistle mean American badass?
Does,
does,
does,
does whistle mean
you're awesome?
And you were saying,
and you were spluttering,
saying,
the moment I dive into the,
into the wave,
put the Limp Bizkit,
press play on the Limp Bizkit CD.
Yeah.
Like,
just like that.
Yeah, exactly.
But time it,
so when I dive in,
just press play on break stuff.
Yeah, exactly. It's just one of those days when you just, yeah, exactly. But time it, so when I dive in, just press play on break stuff. Yeah, exactly.
It's just one of those days
when you just,
yeah, exactly.
It's the first wave goes over.
But these big fucking waves
were like absolutely massive,
like three times the size of me.
They were huge.
Yeah.
And I just thought,
hey, you know,
there's lifeguards,
I mean, it was cool.
But he's whistling,
he's going,
come back, come back.
And I suddenly realised
I couldn't get back, Luke.
Shit.
I couldn't get back, so I was like swimming. I mean, I wasn't drowning immediately suddenly realized i couldn't get back luke shit i couldn't get back so i was
like swimming i mean i wasn't drowning immediately i just couldn't did you panic yeah massively yeah
i was like fuck like i think that's the killer yeah i can't swim back i can't swim back now
um and so and the guy was already kind of coming out and so he gave me his um he gave me his uh
his floaty floor and and we got back.
So, I mean, legitimately saved my life.
I mean, I could have floated a bit longer, I think.
But, I mean, where I would have ended up, I don't know.
But, like, yeah, it was just absolutely fucking horrific
from start to finish.
And what did you do after that?
Were you in shock for a bit?
There was a, yeah, it was just, I mean,
the thing that annoyed me most about Luke was the guy was fucking gorgeous.
Yeah, big muscles.
Massive muscles.
Big muscles.
He was so beautiful.
His name was Abraham.
And he was a fucking dude.
And like, you know, I owe him everything.
So you put this on purpose because so you would come over i mean that that's
what the uh lady in the um in the uh lounger next to us said afterwards it's like yeah i'm i'm yeah
i love that guy i'm i'm following my instagram i've sent pictures of him to all my ladies um
this woman was obsessed with this guy and she said that she'd been there for three weeks and
like they'd seen countless times
where the man had to jump in
and take someone out of the boat.
Yeah, but she's making you feel better then,
isn't she?
Well, later we Googled that beach
and a lot of people have died this year
on that beach.
Oh, really?
I'm like, I mean,
maybe just don't allow us to swim
or just, you know,
just don't allow us to swim on the thing.
It said no notice or sign or anything like that.
There was no signs that said, like, riptides or anything.
But I think that's what I was experiencing.
But it was just fucking horrific from start to finish.
But the further away I get from it, the more I kind of can talk about it.
But, like, the day after, I was like, yeah, I'm not talking about that to anyone.
So now I'm a bit more relaxed about it.
But it was just like, yeah, I think with anything like you yeah i've had a few sort of near death kind
of experiences but none of them have lasted for a quarter of an hour you know none of them lasted
for 10 well they're not lasted for like five minutes it felt like three hours but like none
of them lasted like you yeah you you go to step out when someone pulls your arm like in front of
a car or something and it's a little kind of like a little mini kind of fuck yeah fuck hell but this is like fucking 10 minutes and i was like oh jesus christ like i was just
bobbing around going oh dear and the way it's like how far has life gone from you then how how far
did he have to come to get you i don't know i think the tide was out so it's kind of like the
water was kind of the water was pulling out i think i don't know i i don't know i'm not i'm i can swim and i can get
places but it was it was it was it wasn't dicking about that's the thing like you know me i'm a dick
and i dick about but like i didn't feel particularly guilty about getting into the situation because it
was just like he started whistling i was like oh fuck i can't get back and then so yeah i come in
and uh and give me and and he was a big muscle guy.
And even he was, when he got to me,
he gave us a good five minute shouting at in the water.
And I'm like, can we just get to the fucking beach
and then you can shout at me?
Do this later.
Can we do this later?
He was like, he was like shouting at me.
And I was like, he said, do you not hear the whistle?
I was like, yeah, I could hear the whistle.
But when you're whistling, I couldn't get back.
So can we have this argument on the beach
rather than the trial in the sea please because yeah you are a big muscle man and i can tell that
that little swim is taken out of you as well so let's just chill out let's just take our second
it's his fault you're taking the moral high ground while drowning oh no i know i know yeah
dickhead massive dickhead but um yeah ihead. But, yeah, I couldn't...
Yeah, I couldn't...
I couldn't...
Would you have been
more or less embarrassed
if I had to save you?
No, because then
it would be great content
that both of us
could get involved in.
But now,
it's just me relating
about a hunky
beer watch style lifeguard
who's...
I think if I had that to rescue you,
I think I would have been aroused.
Yeah.
Afterwards.
Yeah, yeah.
It was, I mean, it was pretty,
I mean, sitting there,
woman came over and said,
we were praying for you.
And I was like,
I didn't need that.
Oh, Jesus, really?
What did Sarah say?
What was Sarah doing in all this?
She was a consummate pro.
She always is in situations like that.
But I fear this will come up
in an argument later in life.
Because, let's say i did put her through the ringer a bit but yeah yeah it sounds really frightening i was quite scared hearing the story to be honest and and i didn't think i was going
to talk about it here because i was genuinely fucking like i mean and i can't thank the the
lad enough um because he was he just straight out there I mean I wouldn't have known
that I was in trouble
until he told me
I was in trouble
and I was like
I don't know where I fucking am
oh dear
how bad would that have been
if there was like
no lifeguard
or there were no one around
I mean
but that would have been
I generally don't
I generally don't
I mean to be honest
I mean there were big waves
and like
I think the last bloke
who drowned
was like a rugby player
like
I know they're big guys
but I mean you'd imagine there's some level of fitness there but yeah and like I think the last bloke who drowned was like a rugby player like I know they're big guys
but I mean
you'd imagine
there's some level
of fitness there
but yeah
it's killed a lot of people
but I didn't know
they could have put
a sign up saying
you know what Pete
this is probably
a bit primo for you mate
just stay in the kiddie pit
so based on the Instagram
post I saw
you were having
a lovely time
yeah I mean
I mean
it doesn't make
for good Instagram posts
there's a lovely the last video of me was me pointing at the wave and running into the
sea yeah um and it was uh yeah it was yeah we'd have been devastated if we had lost your p i mean
everyone listening to this would have been absolutely devastated i speak on behalf of
the whole community i think when i say we're not ready to lose you just yet mate no it was it was a difficult uh afternoon but uh yeah it was did you get upset you what did you get upset no but maybe uh again
later in life I'll uh probably internalized it probably internalized it just keep it keep it
yeah keep it push it down but yeah it was uh yeah I I yeah I I I owe him a hell of a lot this block
but um I think I would say that I would say lot, this bloke. I think I prefer the pair story.
I would say there was two lifeguards,
and one of them was my level handsome.
And I'm just saying I would have preferred that one.
That's how you get more handsome,
by saving more and more people.
It's like a Faustian pact.
Yeah, but apparently every day
somebody has to be fucking pulled out,
and it was my turn that day. And I wasn't even dicking about i was just having
a lovely swim in the big waves i don't think you should blame yourself i think it's a perfectly
understandable mistake and we're all very happy that you're safe on the land is it do you think
it's going to affect you swimming in the sea in the future um i i sort of said the next day um if
i don't go back in the sea uh pretty, I'll probably not be able to handle it.
So I went in the sea the next day.
And, yeah.
Yoo-hoo!
Abraham!
Abraham!
Abraham!
I've got my smaller shorts on today.
It was a different sea, but I was a little bit more timid, let's say.
I don't like this particular sea. Shall we go to a different sea? Shall we go to a different sea? but I was a little bit more timid, let's say. I don't like this particular sea.
Should we go to a different sea?
Should we go to a different sea?
I don't like the Pacific.
Shall we try the channel?
When I was in Australia 20 years ago,
I was swimming on a beach on the east coast of Australia.
And at one point I was in a stretch of water.
It was about waist high
and so it wasn't even like i needed to swim i was just walking around and whatever and i was in much
better nick then than i am now yeah and um and honestly it took me i would say all of my energy
to walk back in about 30, maybe 25 meters
because the rip was so strong.
Yeah.
And I promise you now,
if I had to swim it,
and I actually am quite a good swimmer.
It's in my blood.
My dad was a county swimmer.
I'm naturally quite good at swimming.
It's just that I'm not really physically fit at the moment,
but generally as a swimmer, I'm okay.
I can do all the main strokes.
I can do all the shit that you'd see a proper swimmer doing.
And if I had to swim that,
I would never have made it in.
It was only because
I could walk here
that I could get in.
And I actually frightened myself
a little bit
because it is terrifying
because the sea's fucking massive
and angry.
And it was nowhere near
what you've been through there.
So I can only imagine
how awful that would have felt
like at the time.
I sort of get the feeling
that I should have gone maybe further back rather than...
I was just right where all the waves were sort of breaking,
but they were breaking, you know, fucking 10 foot high,
and I'm obviously four foot three.
And you get spun up like a washing machine as well.
I was rotating, I was upside down.
I was like, yeah, this doesn i was like yeah that's uh this is
this doesn't feel good it's not great so it's in like a calmer water i think it is the panic
of the shock of the cold or the panic that gets people because you waste a lot of energy doing
that that's why they say you just float and go with it as much as you can yeah and trust that
you'll be saved like float to survive is what they are and i say so like obviously you didn't
have that option in that situation because it sounded pretty tempestuous but bloody hell mate huge but i wonder what i
was doing at that exact moment because you're five hours behind so it's about two o'clock i think so
yeah two o'clock so you're probably settling down watching i was probably watching an episode of
ramsay's kitchen nightmares while cooking dinner yeah and that's the tapestry of life isn't it
exactly exactly but uh yeah a good time was had by all uh but other than nearly uh
dying um uh yeah all good so just just rank these things in order so the pina coladas um the hotel
the looking at the um tamarin monkeys and then coming face to face with the prospect of death
where would you put those in like i would sort of go, Tamarins, that's a five on the, sorry,
that's an eight on the scale,
recommended.
Nearly Drowning,
that's a two,
because at least
I saw Hunky Abraham.
But some people get
quite exhilarated after that.
Oh, what?
They just suddenly decide to
play a game of Russian Roulette
or something.
They get a big rush
of serotonin
because they've,
you know,
no.
Because of what's happened.
I mean, yeah, I want to drive home now
and then drive home for an hour.
You know, straight after you've got a lot of water
in your lungs and stomach,
you just want to get in the car and fill the autumn road.
Oh, at least it's seasoned.
Salty.
Salty lungs.
I think less good than that was running around San Jose
trying to find tampons.
So they don't seem to do tampons in Costa Rica.
They're very into the towel scene, the thingamajig scene.
So the things I had to do that holiday, that very much ranks even lower than drowning
because that was a right pain, well, in the arse, so to speak.
Well, listen, it sounds like you had a busy, varied time.
Yeah.
Do you feel more relaxed or less?
I'm certainly more tanned.
By the end of the holiday, I was chilled out again, but yeah.
When I saw your face and I saw how tanned your face were
was i now know that's probably just the bruise yeah it's just the puceness of the stress you've
been under horrible i do feel for you i know it feels like it's coming across like i'm taking a
piss but no but that's what the show's all about and and and you know these things happened it was
lucky that um that that that i someone alerted me to the fact
that I was in lots of trouble and then saved me.
So, yeah, Jesus Christ.
I would also say that people who are fans of these kind of
two white men talking to each other podcasts,
which we did first, by the way,
does anyone on those other shows show the kind of commitment
that you're showing to content by, you know,
happily and willingly almost dying to get 20 minutes out of it.
It's a crowded marketplace, Luke.
We've got to find new ways to tell our stories
and we need to sort of up the ante a little bit.
We've spent longer talking about it than the actual incident.
It fucking felt like three hours, I tell you what.
Did your life flash
before your eyes?
No!
I was too busy going
oh god
oh dear
he's taking his time
why was he hurrying up
with his
with his float.
You didn't like
shit your pants or anything
did you?
No but I mean
that might have helped
I could have used it
as a flotation device
floated away.
I just think
I just think that you know
Might have oil I've been eating.
Almost almost drowning is kind of Abraham's bread and butter I just think that, you know... Might have oil I've been eating. Almost drowning
in his kind of Abraham's bread and butter.
But if you drop a turd in your pants,
I think he'd probably just think,
come on.
Get it together, mate.
And you're like,
I just had a coffee.
He'd probably turn back.
I had just eaten a massive sandwich.
And they do say,
as soon as you've eaten a massive sandwich,
you get right in the sea.
I mean, that is idiotic. Don't do that that i could have told you that that's basic oh dear but what happens is your body uses a lot of its energy to digest the food yeah i felt it so
you start to run out of energy a lot quicker if you do that i think also i just i just i just don't
know big wave technique and um it seemed to be that I could have got out with it just by swimming perpendicular to the shore.
You know what I mean?
Like rather than try and attack the pulling of the riptide or whatever head on.
I think that probably would have been a good technique.
But I don't fucking know.
I'm never in the sea.
Why are you continually trying to tame Earth's fundamental element?
Just stay out of it.
Take the fire alarms away, get in the sea.
Lovely.
Stay out of it.
Oh, he chucked himself in a fire the other day.
Yeah.
But I hope I'm not belittling it.
I'm just sort of in a position where I can talk about it.
It was fucking, it was rough.
And something happened.
And again, it's just great content.
You know, it's just great.
That's what I'm most happy about
yeah
exactly
I mean
I think I would probably get
if you had actually died
I'm not sure how many episodes
I would have got
I think
yeah
like a little memorial
like we've got Rory
to cut up a few old episodes
of me talking about
poos and wheeze
and boobies and stuff
and yeah
that's my legacy really
then move on
yeah
I think
I'm annoyed
that you've opened
with this
because I don't
really know
anything else
that seems like
it would be
worth talking
about now
I mean
we're roughly
in time
for the ad break
we'll come back
after the ad break
I'm pleased to have you back
let's have an ad break
to kind of calm down
a bit
it's obviously
come as a shock
to me
and then
the other side of it
maybe we'll think
of something else
to talk about
Pete
how about that
alright then
cool I'm drowning in ads and then the other side of it, maybe we'll think of something else to talk about, Pete. How about that? All right, then. Cool.
I'm drowning in ads.
Money coming in.
It's the Lunga Pete Show.
I'm Pete Donaldson,
safe with my two feet on land,
and Luki Mua is with me.
How you doing, Luki Mua?
Can we do a special guest episode with Abraham?
With Abraham.
I'd love to hear what he thought about it? He's probably still fucking angry. He was so
angry at me. He'd probably be like,
yeah, the water's about probably
two feet deep. It's a really calm
day. It was actually
the swimming pool and
the wave machine was on.
I don't really know what to do.
I don't really know what to... I just feel
very thankful that he was there
and his buddy
with his whistle. Just that he was there and his buddy um with his whistle
and i just just just glad glad he was there just i'm just finding it very hard to deal with the
emotions i'm affected by this i think our listeners will will you know share in your
sharing your distress and sharing your um your shock and we hope you can sometime at some point
rebuild and hopefully enjoy life in the sea again
maybe start off small
with something like
South End
you know
yeah
I can deal
I'm alright in the sea
I like the sea
it doesn't sound like
you are though
the last 20 minutes
sounds like you're
fucking not alright
in the sea
if anything you've not
learned a lesson yet
the day before
I was in equivalent waves
on a boogie board
if I'd had my boogie board
with me I would've been
alright
as he's dragging
you in,
I hope you weren't screaming,
I'm all right in the sea.
I'm all right.
You got me on a bad day, Abraham.
Yeah.
Oh, it's very biblical.
Being saved from the sea by a man called Abraham.
It's good stuff.
It happens to the best of us, mate.
Listen, I'm sure many of our listeners
have got similar experiences
of trying to tame what is a cruel mistress in the shape of the of the ocean so if you have hello at luke and
peachy.com we'd love to hear from you in fact because we've had a little break with the pre
records we've got quite a lot of good emails and we'll try and get through some of them at some
point um i feel bad that i the only notes i've got for today's show are three words and it's just
peach holiday full stop pear question mark yeah now I feel like I've been frivolous
I would say that I wasn't even planning on
talking about this because it was a big deal
for a long time
and then I came to the show and I was like
fuck it my life's an open book
I think you are and I think it's a great credit to you
it's authentic
I just don't plan any other content Luke that's why
I've got to tell you about my life because I haven't found
any emails
so basically your laziness will trump any kind of trauma correct yeah yeah that's
good to know exactly that is good to know um speaking of which i did i did just say the word
email so i'm going to drop an email in yeah um rory producer rory's keen for us to get through
some because i think he thinks that um people email in and we don't read them out and people get deterred,
which I think is probably fair enough.
So if you don't mind, Peter,
I'm going to change the subject somewhat
and bring an email to the four.
So do you want bin men or do you want school bullying
or do you want Wayfair?
Wayfair.
Remember Wayfair?
I had that problem with Wayfair, trying to get money back from me. Wayfair. No. Wayfair? Wayfair. Remember Wayfair? I had that problem with Wayfair,
trying to get money back from me.
Wayfair.
No.
Wayfair.
Wayfair, please.
I think I liked the emails about Wayfair before.
Okay.
Hi, Luke and Pete.
This is from Tom in Vancouver.
He says,
I'm interested to hear your story about Wayfair.
I mean, people will probably remember that story.
We had a few people follow up saying they're terrible.
Do you remember the guy had different parts of a sofa sent and then was told that
they were discontinued?
That's like the middle part of the sofa but not the other part of the sofa.
Yeah, exactly.
Oh, it's good stuff.
So Tom says, I ordered a flat pack piece of furniture from Wayfair a year or so ago.
When I opened it up, the little plastic bag contained the nuts and screws was itself inside
a tatty old glove with a picture of like a
really old looking glove. Oh,
like a latex kind of... Not even
latex, mate. It's woolen. It's a woolen right
handed glove. I mean, so that's one of
those kind of gloves that you get in
wicks. You know,
like the protective but warm but
like they're workman's
gloves, but they've put it in.
It looks like a weird threat
like you know in The Godfather
when you get sent
like a bulletproof vest
with a fish in it
right okay
it feels like
it's almost like
yeah the horse
head in the bed
if Wayfair sends you
a single
right handed glove
what does that mean
because back in
I don't know
medieval times
throwing down a gauntlet
which is basically
a metal glove was like a challenge wasn't it right yeah it's almost like they're saying you'll never
put this furniture together yeah it's it's kind of um if it's it's not a cheap glove it's like
i'd say that's in the four pound tool station because in tool station they always have them
on display um as you go in uh different kind of like levels of, of, of, of disport,
like slightly semi-disposable gloves.
And that's in the four pound,
six pound range.
That's a decent glove.
Do you know what?
It's a kind of glove that you get,
you see supermarket workers using when they're unpacking like fresh stock.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So when,
when I used to have a job at Asda,
stacking the shelves,
when my friend who works in the fruit and veg thing used to ping fruit and
veg at me every time I went back out into the warehouse,
I used to be on the milk and the dairy and the,
the dairy items,
obviously it's these plastic packets of butter basically.
So,
you know,
like your common or garden layer pack or your vitalite or your clover,
right?
There's the plastic lid. They are really sharp oh yes your hand yeah
i used to cut myself like paper cuts all the time and i never got off of gloves once but now
everyone who works in there seems to have gloves it looks like one of those kind of gloves i don't
know why wafer have sent them it's not even like someone's disregarded a pair of gloves by accident
like a surgeon leaving a scalpel in someone's wound it's one glove it someone's disregarded a pair of gloves by accident like a surgeon leaving a
scalpel in someone's wound it's one glove it seems very very odd and i think it means way
it marks a wayfarer out as tom says as a as a weird company to to be dealing with at least
at least you know that a human has touched your sofa that's all i'm saying
like it could be could be a robot glove it could be a robot's glove lovely stuff
lovely stuff
Peter I just want to
squeeze one more email in
before we go
and I'll do the bin man
one
I tried to
I tried to take a picture of
I tried to get Sarah
to take a picture of
some bin men in Costa Rica
who were riding on the back
of their bin lorry
oh great
as soon as Sarah
got the camera up
they leaped off
to go and get the bins
and I cursed them
they leapt off
saying that man's drowning
that man's drowning he's going gonna drown us yeah he's drowning the bin juice oh that'll be that'll be some way
to go that so um chris from california has been in touch and i like the fact that um this bin man
phenomenon has reached all the way to the west coast of the united states and he says hey guys the chat around
bin men and the treasures they may find led me to ask my stepfather who was a garbage man for a few
years out of high school about his refuse collection history i sent him a text asking if he'd ever found
anything good that he kept he replied saying that he found a nice camp stove that he used for years
i expressed my amazement and thanked him for sharing,
to which he replied, without prompt,
and tons of dirty mags.
That was nice.
Perks of the job, I suppose.
Chris from California.
That was nice.
Dirty mags.
It's funny, isn't it?
I suppose you'd have to put your dirty mags
in the recycling these days.
Have you ever had a collection of dirty...
This is more my stuff.
It's dying.
Get back into your wheelhouse.
Have you ever had to dispose of dirty mags?
I have once.
I had some dirty mags back in the days.
No, so the only real experience I've had with them,
and this is going to sound like a cliche,
but I promise you it's true,
is not too far from where we grew up,
there was a place,
so there was Elson Park, and over the where we grew up there was a place so there was
elson park and over the back of elson park was a place called monk's walk which was um an old kind
of disused foresty kind of area quite hard to explain because obviously where i grew up was on
a peninsula so there's all these different creeks that would kind of go into all these different
places so there'll be like a creek there and a forest called Monk's Walk and in there
you used to see
porn mags
all the time
because round that
round that part of the world
there's a load of old
disused air raid shelters
oh right
perfect place to enjoy
which are still open
perfect place to enjoy
yeah but the thing is
you didn't
when you were a kid
you didn't kind of question it
you'd go into an air raid shelter
because it'd be quite frightening
because it was really fucking dark
and you'd never know
what you were going to find in there.
And normally you'd find
like a human turd
and a porn mag.
Yeah.
But you'd never question it.
Yeah, you didn't connect,
ah, what's that porn mag doing there?
And then you're like,
oh, I think I know.
Because seeing the entity by itself,
it's kind of,
you don't think what that's used for
and why it's there.
Why do you need to go
out of your way
into a little forest bit
to have a quick shuffle
off the wrist
to a porn mag
and leave the porn mag there
maybe you don't have a home
well I mean
as soon
you know what
consuming pornography is like
as soon as you're finished
you're like
er
I'm disgusting
the world is disgusting
I'm leaving now
and that never happens
and so
very much so like that is the that is the equivalent of closing now and that never happens and so very much so
like that is the that is the equivalent of closing your browser in it you should leave
i just wouldn't put myself in that position i'm standing in an image how bleak that would be
yeah i'm standing in a pitch black air raid shelter yeah and if you're if it's an abraham
runs in and goes what are you doing what are you doing, Abraham, do you want to look at my magazine?
You shouldn't have told me his name.
Yeah, it'll come back.
Yeah, exactly.
Rory, put Abraham in the episode title of this episode, please.
Save me, Abraham.
Save me, Abraham.
Oh, I am sympathetic, honestly.
I just can't.
I know.
No, it's funny.
It's funny.
It's affectionate. It's affectionate.
It's affectionate.
I'll be very sad to lose you
and I'm as thankful to Abraham
as everyone is.
Yes, I am too.
Anyway, let's go
while you still have your scruples.
My scruples.
All right, then.
Yes, we'll be back on Thursday
where we'll do some batteries
and we'll deal with some of the
crowning head of the
Luca Peetshaw email mountain that Rory's put together. batteries and we'll deal with some of the um the the crowning head of the uh luca peach
shore email mountain uh that rory's put together uh and uh look after yourselves until then all
right i've been pete donaldson still with you still kicking stay away from open water everyone
stay away from open water lukey moore would you like to say goodbye to everybody goodbye to
everybody and i'm as pleased as you all are that Pete's still with us I really am and yeah
good
me too glad I'm here I didn't see another pair goodbye And, yeah, good. Me too.
Glad I'm here.
I didn't see another pair.
Goodbye.
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