The Luke and Pete Show - The Dangerous Donaldsons Act

Episode Date: December 11, 2023

Christmas is a time for friends and family. For Luke and Pete, that means spending the evening going to see an indie band together.Today, we hear all about that recent social excursion. Pete then stays in the Christmas spirit by updating us on his annual trip home to settle differences with his family and the lads try and decide if a BBC presenter should be sticking their middle finger up just before they read the news.Want to get in touch with the show? Email: [e-mail] or you can get in touch on Twitter or Instagram: @lukeandpeteshow.We're also now on Tiktok! Follow us @thelukeandpeteshow. Subscribe to our YouTube HERE.***Please take the time to rate and review us on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to the No It gets worse Every time That's not the show We're doing here Welcome to the Luke and Pete show

It's the Luke and Pete show The last show I hosted Was Rambo Reacts With Andy Brassel. I had to be on my form. I was not on my form. Couldn't find my form. He would have just been

like staring right into your soul thinking, are you good enough for this, Donaldson? No, and so was proved that I was not. How the hell are you doing, Luke?

Pretty good. You all right? I think you are good enough. Is your Christmas period treating you well? Pete, I think you're good enough. You are enough. I am enough. You are enough. Is your Christmas period treating you well? Pete. I think you're good enough. You are enough.

I am enough. You are enough. Is the Christmas period treating me well? I'll let you be the judge of that when I tell you that last night I went to go and see the Charlatans at the Troxy in East London

with you. Did so. You didn't stay to the end. Usual story. Couldn't. Had to get the train which means I'm fresh as a daisy this morning.

I had to get the 8pm train. I had to get the 8.30pm train. I mean I would say that Marcus daisy this morning. I get the 8pm train. Yeah, 30pm train. I mean, I would say that Marcus said that they were going to start at 8.30, but they did not come on until 8.09, did they? Who could have predicted that from a rock and roll band? If there's one thing rock and roll is all about, it's punctuality. It's punctuality, if you're crying out loud. Yeah, but you've got to think about the end of the show.

You've got to think about the people getting the train. There was lots of people on the train on the way back. I actually stood in between carriages, you know, with the wobbly, bobbly... In the vestibule. In the vestibule. But it was... Is that what you call that part of it?

It's not really a separate section on those type of trains, is it? So it's probably not a vestibule, no. No, no, so... I know where you are, though. There are train carriages, and then the little kind of, like, the movable kind of tube in between. The surf dude bit.

The surf dude bit. So I was on that, but also two doors. Do you think that's all you deserve? Well, I stood there and then the doors closed and then I'm just in basically, I felt like I was in like a phone box because I was surrounded by glass. It was quite comfortable in a weird kind of way.

Your parents would put you in time out. Yeah, I felt like I was in the crystal maze. It means you haven't got to talk to anyone. People were looking at me as if to go, that's a strange decision, even for a busy train. Yeah, I think that's on you. Yeah, that is on me. But what did you make of the show,

and what did you make of the people attending the show, Peter? It was good. You know what? I am not the world's biggest or even medium sized Charlton's fan but it's not that's not what last night was about

it was about hanging with some friends watching the Everton Newcastle match on the floor on my phone and it was about just having a nice time

having a couple of beers it was very very cool yeah I enjoyed it I just enjoy I feel the same way that when I went to see the band Rancid in San Francisco

New Year's Day evening. Last year. A few years ago. And they were basically playing the entirety of their seminal important album Elk and the Wolves

and they, and everybody in the crowd were like of a certain vintage and they were, and everyone had a picture of their kid on their phone as their lock screen. And they were really getting down to it, but they were all like slightly older people.

And same with the Charlton's last night, everyone was grooving to the Charlton's cause they are quite, um, they always struck me as being, they kind of eschewed the kind of like robust male bullshit of that Britpop period. And they were a bit more wiggy and a bit more fun

and a bit more expressive, I think. And they didn't conform to like, we're fucking hard or spastic. No, because they predate that, don't they? It's a crucial,

their first record came out in the late 80s, early 90s, might have been 1990. Like, Telling Stories was their big Britpop album, And that was in 97,

yeah, exactly. But you're right to say that they have their roots in essentially the baggy movement, which is a lot more about like... Drugs. Drugs. Yeah, groove and like dance.

It's basically got one foot in dance music. And it's the same with the Stone Roses and other bands around Happy Mondays like that. They've got blood on their hands when it comes to the twang. I don't think you can blame them for the twang. But what I would say is this though, Pete, and that really comes across with them when you see them live. So it's almost like, yes, they are an indie band of just like older white guys,

but it's about the visuals and the groove and people were, and I think there's no coincidence that at that show last night, people were basically dancing in the aisles because we were sat upstairs, in the aisles and downstairs. It wasn't like it did become a bit moshy towards the end right bit masculine towards the end but actually it's about it's about dancing it's about a groove right so so that's i think that really comes across in their music and it's something that perhaps hasn't informed some of their more recent stuff but

maybe you'd expect that because they're older now but all the way through all i would say up to and including stuff they've done like Us and Us Only which is you know getting into the 2000s it's all informed by that and Telling Stories was in my view

it's probably the most underrated record of the Britpop era just because I think they don't really they just weren't really considered to be Britpop they were still around

a bit before the same way like you wouldn't necessarily say Radiohead are Britpop or the Beataband aren't Britpop. It's a different kind of thing.

But also, the one thing you do realise when you watch a band like that with a big back catalogue behind them, it's rare for me, I love the Sharders, really do love them, but I won't listen to four albums of theirs in a row. Because that's mental behaviour right

when you go and watch them live basically what they're doing is they're saying look how many fucking tunes we've got and it's just bang after bang

after bang after bang and it's a great way to spend an evening I think and I think Tim Burgess as well comes across as a very nice man

he does I mean he's kind of like he's been embraced by the sort of the guardian I would say that kind of vibe that six music kind of

I'm doing a podcast about my favourite albums and all that business and stuff he works hard I've gone off him now no but a man in his

he's 56 years old so he's not a spring chicken he would potentially have gone down the road a lot of those other older musicians would have gone

well you just look at like I think bands of their vintage would turn up and sort of go, right, let's maximise the income. Let's not get three big plasma screens on the back. No. Let's rent nothing.

Let's have a big curtain with maybe the Charlton's written on it. Yeah. But then you've got Ian Brown playing Butlins with a music track, a tape recorder. Yeah. Possibly some nunchucks. And basically in between every song denying COVID. Ian Brown playing Butlins with a musical track, a tape recorder, yeah. Possibly some nunchucks. And basically in

between every song denying COVID. Yeah, pretty much, yeah. So you can go in different directions. Tim Burgess spent the whole of the

lockdown doing a listening party for lots of his Twitter followers and donating money to charity. Good lad. Good lad. Just a cool guy,

always been cool, always been so, back in the 90s he was like the fucking handsomest guy and just a very, a cool guy. Always been cool. Always been so. But back in the 90s, he was like the fucking handsomest guy. And just a very, very cool man. I just never thought he had the, he had thick hair then, but I just did not.

It's become like a thatched roof now. It's a big blonde mop now. It's a big blonde mop. He looks great, doesn't he? He does look fantastic. I mean, we were quite far away, but he does look great. And that's part of the reason why he looks great.

Exactly. Yeah, but I did Google image him afterwards, and I think, you know what, he doesn't look 56. No. He looks good. So listen, I had a nice time with you. It's the first time I've spent, it's the first time I've been,

how shall I frame this so you don't get annoyed? It's the first time I've ever been privy to a social event with you of an evening that hasn't related to work for probably plus five years. Well, you know, works both ways, doesn't it? You just don't like my personality, is that what you're saying?

You don't like my personality. Agree, but I'm just asking if you're going to return that favour. I had a good time. Rory's asked, before we move on, Rory's asked us to... Stop this.

Stop all of this. Rory's asked to not be the producer of the show anymore. I'll just read what Rory's written. Right, okay. Read what Rory's written. It's almost time... This should be a feature in itself. Read what Rory's written. It's almost time... This should be a fiction itself.

Read what Rory's written. It's almost time to celebrate Christmas on the Luke and Pete show. Oh. As is tradition, we want to read out stories relating to your best or worst Christmas, and there's bonus points

if you ever called your mum a greedy cunt. Which one of our listeners did once, by accident one year. Email your Christmas stories, anything to do with Christmas, your best Christmas, your best Christmas, your worst Christmas, the time that your annoying cousin

stole the last quality street, whatever, the time that you showed Jurassic Park to your granddad for the first time, which I did one Christmas and it was amazing. Email your stories

to hello at lukeandpeachshow.com. That's the usual email address. Please do so and we will read out our favourite ones. Tell you what, yeah, I'll do that again. Go now. it's almost time

to celebrate Christmas on the Luke and Pete show as is tradition we want to read out stories related to your best or worst Christmas basically hello at lukeandpeetshow.com

hello at lukeandpeetshow.com for your favourite Christmas story. Screams are just funny, aren't they? What are the screams from? It's just human screams. Have you recorded this yourself? Well, that's especially an insect screaming. I once drove down Southend, the main...

My mate, Al, as discussed before, he gets terribly embarrassed very easily. So I rolled down all the windows and I Bluetoothed my phone to my car and played just Screams. So everyone was looking at us as we were driving down Southend Promenade. How did that go down?

He was embarrassed. He nearly folded up into an envelope. How do you feel about your reputation is in Southend at the moment? I don't know. I mean,

I think it's pretty good. I had an exchange earlier in the kitchen with someone which was a very successful piece of small talk and I really chuckled all the way back to the office

thinking I wish I'd seen Pete for that. Right. What was the subject of the small talk? I walked into the little kitchen where they have the cold water tap. Yeah. You went, oh, isn't it cold?

Isn't water cold? Rubbish. I said to the... There was a woman walking in behind me and I just said to her... You're, like, getting wet. What are you doing? I'm just...

I'm just saying... What are you doing? I don't know what you want to say. I looked her in the eye, very close up, and I went, we all need water. No,

I just said, I just said, how you doing? Good morning. She was like, oh, good morning. Terrible.

That sounds awful. That was absolutely terrible. I held the door open for her, she said, thank you. I said, have a nice day. She said,

thank you very much. And that was it. I just think, that's all it needs, no just think That's all it needs No listen That's all it needs to be There's nothing there for anyone There's nothing there for anyone

Passing the time of day And not being It's just Not being silently intense It's just crap Not looking at your feet And being silently intense No I could do all that stuff

But I've very much Got to be in the mood for it You're in the mood For that kind of waffle All the time All the time Yeah And I'm just like We're not getting anything done here what should i talk about politics i just

sit on there and i'm like you know william glanston at speaker's corner just just just talking about my religion about the the wigs i think that people respect that I know when to kill a conversation and walk off. Maybe you think that I think, maybe that you think that they just think I'm really boring. Yeah. Don't do that in your small talk. Don't do that. Ah! Speaking of that kind of

common courtesy, did you see that the BBC News reporter Marianne Mashiri accidentally gave everyone the middle finger on BBC News the other day. Yeah, and I very much enjoy two sides of the Twitter pie, as you say. People sort of going, don't worry darling, it was the funniest

thing ever, blah blah blah blah. People make mistakes, blah blah blah. And then some people go, this is why the compromise defund the BBC. This is why the blah blah blah blah blah, blah. Yeah. Do you think her... Which one were you?

Both. It's important to present both sides, which is something the BBC loves to do. She should have done the other finger. She should have done the other finger. Give it a bit of Billy Balance. Do you think that she, her explanation was mealy-mouthed? I haven't seen it.

What was her explanation? Her explanation was, I was having a mess, I was doing a countdown with my colleagues, you know, five to one, and I, for a joke, I switched the finger around.

But it didn't seem like she wanted people to know that she was doing a funny little swear. I think she thought it was just a little joke. Yeah. And he sort of go,

do what, there's bigger things, I will be talking about bigger things now on the telly so don't worry about it it's not necessarily mealy mouth

it's kind of just irrelevant yeah it's like you're in a I mean I'm not going to be kind of sanctimonious about it no we've got the tips yeah because obviously

you know shit goes on all the time but you know you've I mean it is slightly different so for example

a couple of my friends who, I've got a couple of groups of friends and they, and they are almost surprisingly mistrusting of what they call quite the media. Right. They think, um, cause they have proper jobs. Yeah.

Some of them have important jobs and they're like, you're fucking media. This man, it doesn't really mean anything. Just saying the media. Yeah. And they don't get that. And that's fine.

And I'm sure it's the same the other way around with their jobs when i've talked about it um but they will kind of sometimes use that type of stuff as saying it's not fucking serious job it's not it's not a proper fucking job right it's reading the news right and that doesn't what the point i made today what i do is more important now what i made is they because they said, oh, if you had done that on one of your shows, or someone had done it on one of your shows, would they be fired? And I said, well, we don't pre-record. We don't go out live.

We pre-record people. And also, I can't think of any jobs you would get fired for for doing that. But is it not... Maybe that's right, but is it not different... So, the only thing I can think of in a live environment I've done

is like sports radio. And that's not important. No one cares. No. So, if you're about to go... But I think there is a live environment I've done is like sports radio and that's not important no one cares so if you're about to go but I think there is a difference because if you're about to go middle finger as a joke because you're fucking about

by the way 5,000 children have been killed in Gaza that's bad you should be doing that you should be giving the gravitas that it needs would Angela Rippon

be doing that where's that come from in the 80s is Angela Rippon the one who's been on Strictly lately yeah she looks great as well for her amazing... She's like 75 or something.

She's like doing all mad splits and stuff. Did the splits the other day. Yeah, did the splits. She's got another streak. Yeah. Someone said, you should do Strictly. I said, thanks, I will. But I'm saying, is there an element of like

anchoring a BBC news report should mean more? Or is that too pompous? I just think she should have shaffernackered it. She should have done a bit of that. I think that's just He's doing the weather no one gives a fuck about that.

I don't even know why we have weather reports on TV anymore. It could be naughty weather. People really need weather. You just don't check the weather enough. I love the weather.

Because you're a shacket man. I've got about four apps. I'm just saying we don't need it on the telly. Who's really going and looking on the telly for the weather't need it on the telly. Right, okay. Who's really going and looking on the telly for the weather report? Loads of people.

Loads of people who don't use phones or iPads and stuff. How many people in the UK do you honestly think don't have a mobile phone? All people. They watch the telly for the news and the sport and the weather, don't they? They can't go out.

They can't go out. It's a good point, actually. Yeah. I think that it's one of those antiquated things. Because actually, what people tend to do is hugely overestimate how many people watch. Because I think that was on BBC News, wasn't it? The news channel. Right, yeah, yeah. Oh, God, no one's watching that.

Exactly. My dad will, and I visited them for about 10 hours earlier in the week, sort of saw... Oh, you just turned up unannounced because you can't tell them in advance Yeah no well we kind of had a fall announce I thought you know what

I'll bring Sammy up the dog and to be fair that did sort of smooth over some objections I had Do you want to talk about the falling out

or not really? Not really I mean it was just general lack of effort on their behalf to come down to see us I feel like I'm very much getting

one side of the story. Yeah, but as always I mean we're a defensive breed, the Donaldsons and I think they did jump to And that's why it's normally destroyed. The Dangerous Dogs Act. The Dangerous Donaldsons Act.

And so they very much focused on one sentence in a three paragraph text that I sent them it'd be fair to say just to give the listeners a bit of an insight you don't always choose your language that carefully I do on a text

and I have gotten a lot better on a text I do I'd have thought about that and they are getting to the age I'm afraid where I'm sorry to say I'm having to be the grown up in our relationship and talk about feelings

and things that happen when people make certain choices and things like that but they're very much in their groove they want to do what they want to do

and they don't want to break out of that so you went up there with the dog as an olive branch with the dog as a bit of an olive branch and yeah

he definitely fulfilled that role I thought you were going to say defecated. He didn't defecate, no. He's on good behaviour, was he? He's on very, very good behaviour. He knew the stakes. He knows the stakes, does Sam.

He loves the stakes. And that's the Christmas visit done now, is it? That's the Christmas visit done. I've got other things in the works for Christmas. A compromise has been achieved? A compromise has been achieved, yeah. Everything is pretty good. The WhatsApp group has never been busier.

The family WhatsApp group my dad's sending. All sorts of memes. All sorts of political stuff. Is it still Diane Abbott? No, there was a lawyer. I can't remember. It was a lawyer who seems to be the darling of the offensive right-wing press. Your dad shouldn't be right-wing as an ex-minor, really.

No, he's gone generally mental. I think he just sort of gets to that age where he just thinks that everyone's shit, but the people who he's told are shit come from the Daily Mail. So he regurgitates what he reads, really. Yeah, sad. Sad, really sad.

I've met your parents. I love them both. They're both very nice people to me. I've got your parents and I love them both they're both very nice people to me. I've got nothing but good things to say about them but family things are never easy.

I mean what you should probably remember is that every single family and I include myself in this and everyone I know in this and presumably everyone listening to this as well has some

kind of family drama. Yeah. It's a different flavour. I have especially around Christmas because there's kind of. People get stressed. Feelings get high.

And I think that I feel like sometimes with my family, I'll say something which I think is a reasonable thing to say. Right. At any other time of the year, it would be accepted reasonably. But for some reason at Christmas, people get so... They lionise that time of year so much... Right. ...that it just gets put in a far different context than it needs to.

I'm not eating your fucking turkey. Yeah. Well, honestly. Right. I think that there's certain elements. I know people who, you know, who will maybe suggest to their parents that, you know, just for one year, why don't we go for a walk on Christmas day? Yeah.

Why don't we change the usual routine? And it's like fucking shut down. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it's like... You're trying to bring other cultures into it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And the reason that's weird is because every other weekend of the year

they love going for a walk. So what's different about this? Yeah, yeah. I mean, I guess it's not your job yet. I don't know. I suppose. It's like in the episode of The Sopranos when

Tony Soprano's daughter's boyfriend has dinner with him for the first time out at a restaurant and to try and be nice he secretly pays the bill right

and Tony goes mental yeah yeah yeah yeah listen to me I fucking pay you fucking eat and that's the end of it do you know what I mean

it's that kind of idea yeah I didn't realise this was such a sauce the hierarchy yeah and i think also what what i feel like has happened occasionally in my family is that like christmas quote unquote traditions have been ushered in that i knew nothing about right and didn't have a say in elf in the shelf you've got to play the elf in the shelf why Why am I dressed up as the elf again? Kicking over bins. Yeah, and it's like, I don't, I didn't acquiesce to this. Christmas was never traditionally, let's do four days in the same house together. We don't need to do that.

No, okay, right. We'll all have a nicer time if we do, maybe it's like a little bit more lighter than that, given that we've all got kids and there's no room and it might just make it really stressful. You know what I mean? That kind of thing. So kids and there's no room and it might just make it really stressful. You know what I mean? That kind of thing. So anyway,

there's a little flavour of what we can hopefully expect from our listeners when they submit their Christmas stuff. Just high pressure emotional stamping down of your own feelings

of the people's feelings. I would say that like I think out of all of out of each of the situations like my mum and dad will not put a bit of tinsel up, they will not celebrate Christmas, will get a video call perhaps,

but that is very... They don't put a tree up. Don't put a tree up. They'll maybe put like a little mini tree. Did they when you and your sister were younger? Yeah, yeah.

So when we were at home, but they just see it as a big old faff and they don't get involved in Christmas and they just spend it alone. And so I think out of the two situations,

I would prefer them to enjoy the season a little bit. Yeah, no, I understand that. And I think that's fair enough. And look, we mustn't go too deep on this because our families haven't chosen to be broadcasters, have they, Peter? So they haven't got a right to reply.

Fuck them. Yeah, on the other hand. The things they've done to us. Let's have a break, Peter. Asthma? Childhood asthma? Thanks, Dad. No, you're getting both barrels, I'm afraid. But we're having a break Peter asthma childhood asthma thanks dad no you're getting both barrels I'm afraid

but we're having a break go back to school with Rogers and get Canada's fastest and most reliable internet perfect for streaming lectures all day

or binging TV shows all night save up to $20 per month on Rogers internet visit Rogers.com for details we got you Rogers Save up to $20 per month on Rogers Internet. Visit rogers.com for details. We got you.

Rogers. All right, we're back with a look at Pete Shaw on a Monday, part two. Oh, it's Monday, the 11th of December. Who was born on the 11th of December? You haven't planned this, have you? I haven't, no. Brenda Lee, the country singer. Oh, yeah.

She was in the press recently. Was she? She did. Good. What did she do recently that got her in the press? Fought Remus. Remus Daryl Foyet. Did she do Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree?

Right. And there was a big thing. Oh, yeah, that's it. So there's a Christmas at the old Opry thing in Nashville. And she came out and did Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree, which she did originally and everyone said

it was amazing. And Mariah Carey sent her a load of props. So she was in the press. Right, okay. I'm really pleased it was that because as I started

to say that sentence, I thought it was probably that she's died because she's about 80. No. But she hasn't. No, well done. There's a generation,

there's a kind of, this is really hard to explain and there's no science behind this, but there's a certain type of American person who lives forever. Right, yeah, yeah, yeah. They're just, for some reason,

in the United States, it appears that a lot of older people are way, way more lithe and sharp at their age than you'd think. Like I told you, Mimi's family's next door neighbour is 105. Norman Lear, 101. 101. 101.

Yeah. Wild. Pete, we went round to my wife's family's next door neighbour two weeks ago. She's still living at home. Yeah. On her own. 105. In that weather.

Yeah, well, obviously her house is heated. Yeah. Yeah, it's obviously the house is heated, but yeah, it's incredible. 105? Yeah. That just seems, I mean,

presumably she's got people in there helping her out. She has somebody who comes in in the evenings and stays overnight with her. Right. But she's still in her own home. Yeah. And you turn up

and she's like, great to see you, how you doing? It's not like, it's not like, which one are you again? My mum's 70 and she goes up the stairs

on four, on all fours, like a dog. She was raised by wolves. She was raised by wolves just simply because she will refuse to get a hip operation. Right. Oh, God. I know of someone. Actually, I'm not going to say that.

Let's do it. I know of someone who is a dog-man hybrid. Do you know why I'm not going to say that? Right. Because I said something about a story that he told me recently. Right. And he listens. He's a regular friend a story that he told me recently and he listens he's a regular friend of mine

and he said and he was like literally like mate mate can you stop doing that so anyway

we've got an email here from Terence and he do you see enough Terence's around these days no I don't even think

Terence Trent Darby that's the only one I think of these days these days Terence Malick great film director what did he direct come on what Ernest Trent Darby? That's the only one I think of. These days? These days. Terence Malick? Great film director?

What did he direct? Come on. What? The Thin Red Line? Oh, yeah, good. Done some other stuff as well. He's one of those film directors that just does a movie every 15 years and everyone goes,

he's a genius. He is a fucking genius. He's got the space and time, yeah. Terence, I mean, I would have thought you got a lot more Terences in your neck of the woods. It's kind of a very Cockney East End Essex type

is it Terrence Terrence coming soft for your tea because Terrence Terrence is slang for um weight isn't it like as in Terry weight

Terrence oh yes I guess Terry's I guess Terry's a shot for Terrences lost a bit of Terrence yes it is well not always but

I found out that um my partner's mum is an Edith rather than Edie. She's always called Edie, so I was presumed that... I think Edie's a lovely name.

Edie's a lovely name, isn't it? Yeah. Bring it back. Bring it back. Edie and Frank. Edie and Frank. God bless them. Solid Cockney names.

God bless them. Are they Cockneys? Are they Cockneys? Well, East Ham, yeah. Yes, then. Yes, then. Just say yes. I heard the Bow Bell

just yesterday, I think. Did you? I don't know why there was bells yeah. Yes then. Yes then. Just say yes. I heard the bow bells yesterday, I think. Did you? I don't know why there was bells happening. It's bow bells. Bow bells. Yeah, not bow. Bow bells. Not bow.

Like a bow bun. Not a bow. Bow bells. Yeah, because I only ever hear fucking cockneys talking about it. Bow bells. Yeah. Isn't it? Anyway, Terence, thanks for reminding me.

Probably by a buyer. Yeah. He's probably a cockney himself. He says, so he's following up on the jet ski outside the man's house. Oh, it's lovely. It really is lovely buyer. Yeah, he's probably a cockney himself. He says, so he's following up on the jet ski outside the man's house. Oh, it's lovely. It really is lovely stuff. Yeah, we've not had a specific follow-up from our man yet

because they're too frightened to go around his house next to us. Fair enough. Terrence says, hi, boys. Just been catching up on the show and listening to you talk about one man and his jet ski a couple of episodes ago. I'd love to hear your opinion on the attached photographs. I live in a quiet area of Bournemouth.

This house is a few roads down from mine. It couldn't be a more basic British suburban place full of couples and families. Does this give the area character? I'll let the images speak for themselves. I did once see an old man in the window once. Think Albert Einstein, but with much longer hair. It was like a horror movie.

I think I'd prefer to live next to a jet ski than this. And Luke, think yourself lucky when it comes to the lady with the cones. At least it's not this. And that's from Terrence. And basically, he's attached a photo of a very communal garden, a very nicely sized detached house in an area of Bournemouth that he doesn't mention. And it is absolutely full of mobility scooters. Yeah, it's...

I mean, the house itself, apart from the sort of porch awning roof, it seems like it's in pretty decent nick. But the front is... Somebody must be writing letters to the council, because busybodies would do that, wouldn't they? We have to be careful

here, because this looks like it may be a hoarder's house. I think it's a psychological condition that we should respect and be sympathetic towards yeah keep it in the house though it's very much you know it's very much uh dialing it up a few notches from the jet ski man it's a scrapyard it's a scrapyard and just off mobility scooters well mobility scooters uh they've got a poncho for um aerials there's a there's a stored as well. I mean, it looks like it's halfway through getting fixed up, but I think we all know it isn't. But it's a spectacular sight.

It's a big, big mountain of... There's probably a lot of batteries in there as well. You don't like to see that. I mean, that's going to go up. It reminds you... Does it remind you of your subconscious? Yeah, just fewer batteries. Less energy in there.

There are three perfectly put together and parked working mobility scooters out the front as well which i guess brings the similarities to to the jet ski situation that we talked about a few few episodes ago listen i would always say that in um in british life what i find interesting about it is that it always looks not always but like the thing about british life which is fascinating is that there's plenty of stuff that on the surface looks perfectly every day i'm not gonna say normal or abnormal because that seems pejorative but like everyday life but then you start scratching beneath the surface and british people love to do weird shit

behind closed doors in the shadows furtively don't they they're not out there a British person is not going to go out in the street in their dressing gown toting a big fucking gun no it's my liberty

the weird shit's going to happen when no one else is around and I think that's an interesting part of British culture Diff he's 65 he's made an erotic train set in his attic.

Yeah, exactly that. Why did it have to be erotic? Would you do one of them? I reckon I'd probably get into the train set. The engine of the train is just a big deal, Don. Just go through. I would say that, like, I mean, even like that is quite furtive, isn't it? It's my secret shame, my secret interest.

That definitely happened fairly recently when the great Rod Stewart came out and said, I've got this amazing train set. I've never told anyone about it. It's a private hobby. And it's like, fine. And you'll have your own reasons for that. But I don't think that's anything to worry about. No.

Why are you keeping that secret? It's not Townsend desk, is it? So I think, no, it's not. And I think, well, exactly. I think, fair enough, if you don't want to be, with someone like Rod Stewart, maybe he just feels like so much of his life is public that he wants something for himself, and that's fine.

Right. But I think there's like public and there's private, but there's a scale there. I still think he thinks that he's sexy. I think that's the one, really. I think he probably has a very low opinion of what people think trend spotters or train guys are. Oh, so he's killing the street cred, basically.

And he's killing the street cred. He doesn't have, he's in his 70s. There's a lot of musicians like that who look like your nan, basically. Yeah, yeah. Paul Weller. Paul Weller, yeah. Johnny Marr.

Johnny Marr, less so, but yeah. Rod Stewart. Rod Stewart, definitely, for sure. And so they either go that way, or they go proper right-wing Brexit way, don't they? What really pissed me off about when Roger Daltrey did all that Brexit stuff is that, this is going back a bit as well,

but this is part of the problem, is just that he's, because it's the massive topic of the day at that time, Brexit, he's done an interview and I think at the time he's promoting a show that the Who are doing at Wembley Stadium, so he's doing all this fucking press. And someone at Wembley Stadium, right? So he's just doing all this fucking press. And someone just says to him,

chucks it out there, what about Brexit then, eh? And he just goes, because he can afford to have these type of opinions. Yeah, and he hangs out in country pubs with men who own Jaguars.

But he's not even thought about it. He'll just go, oh, I think we're better off out of it. And that's it. And that becomes a big thing. A massive thing.

Undercut the PR massively. Yeah, and Roger Daltrey is pro-Brexit. Where are you? Get it on the front page of the Express. Right. And everyone can understand it.

And that's part of the problem, isn't it? Where, just have a train set, Roger. Just have a train set, Roger. Or a Scare Let's Trick. Talk to your mate. He plays the guitar.

You don't see Scare Let's Trick much anymore. You don't. You see a lot of, near where I play football, it's Garen's Park. It might not be Garen's Park. It's somewhere else. You don't. You see a lot of near where I play football. Is it Garen's Park? Might not be Garen's Park. It's somewhere else.

It doesn't matter. Either way, they've got a proper RC car track, if you know what I mean. Where's this? Where I play 11 Aside. Next to it. Is that what you're thinking about when you're playing? On the ground.

And they've got even like a raised platform where like you can you can do your car and you can see it

from a raised platform so it's almost like a bird's eye view that you're doing your RC car it's a lovely little touch it sounds great

those kind of hobbies there was a little boating lake near where I grew up because I grew up next to the sea like an inlet and like a boating lake

and it was RC boats yeah they built it to be perfectly still and the people were using RC boats near where I grew up, because I grew up next to the sea, like an inlet and then like a boating lake. And it was... Arcee boats? Yeah. They built it to be perfectly still, and the people were using Arcee boats. But the problem with that is, that is a fucking high-risk, high-cost hobby.

One crash, it's costing you hundreds of pounds. How fast do you think the boats go, though? I've seen... I've seen them go... The speedboat ones. Yeah, just pile into the side of the lake, and they're broken. Same with a remote-controlled car, isn't it? Well, I mean, the bigboat ones. Yeah, just pile into the side of the lake and they're broken. Same with a remote control car, isn't it?

Well, I mean, the big ones are the planes, aren't they? Up in Two Tree Island, which is a non-docking spot, hilariously, near where I live in Leon C. They've got a plane, they've got a runway. Did you mean to say dogging? Dogging, yeah. I didn't say docking, I said dogging. I thought you said docking, which is something entirely different.

Well, I'm sure if you decided to do that... There's something there for everyone. There's something there for everyone. You went, look, I know we're all cold. Let's get colder. Or is it ice docking? It doesn't matter. Oh, no, docking is when you put the thing in the other thing.

Ice docking is something completely different, but more filthy somehow. Yeah. You okay? Yeah. What were you trying to say? We've got like a

proper runway, a proper little RC plane runway. I've seen the videos and the perspective of some of those videos makes it look like

they're real planes for a bit. It's fun. Anyway, let's get out of here. Thanks for your email though Terrence and do try and be

mindful that some people have psychological issues and that we should be sympathetic and very kind towards them because that's what they need. However, I'm never going to turn down a photograph of, quite frankly, 50-odd mobility scooters in the same garden.

I bet there's some lovely stuff in there. I bet you could. As a hoarder myself. You'd have a field day in there. I'd have a field day. We'll be back on Thursday, won't we, Peter? Batteries. Give us an email.

If you're having a weird Christmas, if you're anticipating a weird Christmas, if you've had a weird Christmas in the past, let us know. Tell us what you get up to at Christmas. We like to embrace Christmas traditions and the nuances of the Gregorian calendar mean that we're going to have an episode out on Christmas Day.

Disgusting. This year. If you listen to that, you hate your family. But we would love to hear from you anyway. So it's hello at LukeandPete.com for all your Christmas-related correspondence. Peter, take us out of here.

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