The Magnus Archives - MAG 94 - Dead Woman Walking
Episode Date: February 22, 2018#0172904Statement of Georgina Barker regarding the last words of possible corpse. Recorded direct from subject April 29th 2017.Content Warnings for this episode are at the end of the show notes.Thanks... to this week's Patrons: Joshua Wilson, Rhiannon Knol, Cynthia J. Steward, Morgan, Julian Plumadore, Zenia McAllister, Chris Schneidmiller, Ryan Frazier, Dan Pratt & ShaunIf you'd like to support us, head to www.patreon.com/rustyquillEdited by James Austin, Brock Winstead & Alexander J Newall.The Archivist is played by Jonathan Sims, Georgie Barker is played by Sasha SiennaSound effects for this episode provided by justiiiiin, pogmothoin & previously credited artists via freesound.org.Check out our merchandise at https://www.redbubble.com/people/rustyquill/collections/708982-the-magnus-archives-s1You can subscribe to this podcast using your podcast software of choice, or by visiting www.rustyquill.com/subscribe.Please rate and review on your software of choice, it really helps us to spread the podcast to new listeners, so share the fear.Content Warning for:UndeadMortalityDepression Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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take a look at our rewards. Quill Presents The Magnus Archives Episode 94
Dead Woman Walking walking. Right.
Right.
And you're sure you're okay with this?
And with me recording?
I mean, no.
But you told all your stuff, so...
I mean, it's just fair, I think.
I mean...
Maybe I know something that can help.
No, it's not...
There are some things it doesn't help to know more about.
So, how does this work?
You just...
Tell your story.
Right.
Would it help if I...
asked?
Yeah, yeah, maybe.
Okay.
Statement of Georgina Barker regarding the last words of a possible corpse.
Recorded direct from subject April 29th, 2017.
Statement begins.
So, what happened?
It was my first year of university, before I'd met you.
I was still studying English at Balliol back then and trying to hide how poor my family was from everyone else.
None of them said anything, of course, but whenever they talked I could count the seconds before I got
lost, before one of them made a reference or assumed something about my life and I realised
I was out of my depth. I'd learned what a punt was, there couldn't have been much more than that,
surely. I'd read so many books and nobody knew any more about my subject than I did,
but the way my classmates all seemed to read Latin or reference philosophers I'd never heard of,
I'd never been able to travel outside the country, but everyone seemed to assume I went skiing every
winter. I felt I'd wandered on stage without a script. I felt boring, like I was being judged
on all the experiences I'd never been able to have.
And I always remember their faces when I'd get excited and a hint of scouse would creep into my voice,
like I was some sort of curiosity.
I was scared all the time, terrified that someone would see through me,
see the fraud I felt like I was.
There was only one person I really felt myself around.
Her name was Alex Brooke, and she was a medical student at Corpus Christi.
She'd grown up in an ex-mining town in the Black Country, though I can't remember which one,
and she seemed to feel the same way I did. But where I was anxious and self-conscious,
she was angry. I never met anyone who could skewer the pompastickheads like she could.
I think she actually headbutted some rich kid from Christchurch once.
She was a couple of years above me, and we met after we both went to some self-satisfied theatre
thing in my second week. We simultaneously decided to ditch it halfway through when they started
talking about the highlights of the last season at the National. We went for a drink instead, and just like that we were inseparable. Alex was always so confident, so utterly unafraid. I always admired her for that,
even if I sometimes found it almost as intimidating as the posh boys quote in Latin.
I think she made a point of never letting anything shake her. Even when talking about
the most morbid subjects, she never lost that smile. And as a medical student, there were plenty of morbid subjects to talk about.
She'd discuss her dissections with me, I think just to watch me squirm a bit,
and talk about how hungry she always got at the smell of preserved brain,
and apparently it's exactly like tinned tuna.
She liked to make that observation just before taking a big bite of her sandwich.
I don't think I actually ever saw her eat tuna any other time. Maybe she didn't even like the stuff, she just wanted to make a point.
I'm sure you remember all the protests back then. I went on a few marches myself, so
it didn't exactly come as a huge surprise to hear that there was a group occupying one of the faculty
buildings. What was strange about the whole thing was nobody seemed to exactly know what the group were protesting, or exactly when it had started.
They'd taken over part of the medical sciences building though, so I think most people assumed it was some sort of scientific ethics or animal rights thing.
The staff were all very quiet about it.
Alex was loudly angry about it, as was her way.
I wasn't sure exactly what it was about, but reckoned I
was probably on the protester's side or close to it, but she was having none of it. Apparently,
classes were being changed all over the place to avoid that part of the building, and it was
playing havoc with her schedule. One night, when we were both through a few pints in Balliol Bar,
I mentioned that it was a bit weird there weren't more police around, if they were illegally occupying the place. And she got this little light in her eye,
this wrinkle around the edges that I knew meant trouble.
I asked her what she was planning, but she just shook her head and gestured to get another drink.
I didn't see her again until the following afternoon. She called me up out of nowhere
and demanded we have lunch. I didn't point out that it was past four. There was something in her voice that made me think
she hadn't slept and not because she'd partied the night away. I pushed a plate of chips and
sausage towards her but she barely looked at it. Finally she looked up at me and I saw something
new in her face. I saw fear. They were just sitting there, she said.
Apparently, Alex had found her way back into the medical science building after putting me drunkenly to bed.
God knows what she was planning to do.
I don't think even she was completely sure.
Something about catching the protesters sleeping and bothering them the way she thought they'd been bothering her.
She'd found her way to the rooms they'd taken over and was about to go in
when she'd
glanced through the small window on the swinging double doors.
They were lying on the floor, she told me. All of them. Not like they were sleeping,
but like they'd just collapsed, motionless, where they had been standing. There were no
placards, no signs, just a couple dozen normal-looking students fallen to the floor.
Their chests moved up and down slowly, so Alex was sure they'd been alive, but their eyes stared vacantly into the space in front of them, and everything else about them seemed lifeless and empty.
Some of them were lying with their heads or legs at odd, uncomfortable-looking angles, but they either didn't notice or didn't care.
They all seemed to have fallen away from a single, central point in the room.
Kneeling there was the only figure who hadn't collapsed.
She was an older woman, Alex said, and was almost completely naked.
Her skin was pale and her head was shaved.
Like the others, she was still, with only the movement of her chest showing she was still alive, but unlike those
on the floor, her eyes moved. They gently swept from one side of the room to the other,
like she was searching for something. Then those eyes settled on Alex, staring in through
the door. The eyes didn't light up, they didn't narrow or show
any sign they'd registered her existence. They just stopped moving and looked at Alex as though
waiting for her next move. And it was at that point Alex had recognised the woman, and run.
Obviously, I wanted to know who the woman was, and I demanded Alex tell me, but she told me to...
Well, she said she didn't want to say, and pushed her now-cold lunch away from her.
I wasn't letting her get away that easily, and I pressed the point.
Who was this woman with the shaved head? Where had she seen her before?
Finally, Alex admitted that she'd seen the woman during classes at the medical building.
Was she a tutor? What was her name?
Alex looked me right in the eyes.
They weren't allowed to tell us their names.
It took a few moments to work out what she meant, and when I did, I felt dizzy.
Alex had such absolute certainty in her voice, but she had to be wrong.
It was impossible.
such absolute certainty in her voice, but she had to be wrong. It was impossible. I had no idea what to say, and all I could manage to do was blurt out, Tuna? She stared at me for a few seconds, then
shrugged and looked to the floor. We sat there in silence for a long time, trying to understand what
had just been said. I mean, there was no way that there could be something in a university building
causing students to collapse and nobody was taking any steps to deal with it, especially
if it involved one of the cadavers. It just wasn't possible. But the only other explanation I could
come up with was that Alex was lying, and I just needed to look at her to know that was even less
likely. So I did what I felt was the only thing I could do in that situation. I told her I'd go with her if she wanted to take a second look.
She didn't, but we went anyway.
It was Saturday, and the place was eerily quiet.
Even without classes or labs, there were always a few students hovering about,
going to and from places, eager to get some work done when everywhere wasn't so crowded.
But all we passed heading into the building was a single police car sat empty,
just slightly mounting the curb.
The door to the medical science building stood open.
It was a bright day, but the hall stood dark.
Alex looked at me just once, as if asking whether I was sure about doing this.
I wasn't, but I still nodded.
We stepped inside. The building was cool and quiet, with just the faint drone of the air
conditioning in the background. I'd never actually been inside before, but Alex's steps
were confident in their direction, even if she wasn't confident in her purpose. Finally,
she pushed open a pair of doors to one of the teaching rooms,
and I saw the scene she'd described.
There were the students, lying on the floor.
But not just students.
I saw faculty, and even a policeman slumped there like the others.
What Alex hadn't mentioned was how grey they all seemed.
Not in the sense they were sickly,
but like they'd had the colour simply
drained away from them. And knelt in the middle was the woman. Her skin seemed grey as well,
but in her it was clearly the colour of death. It didn't matter that her ribs rose and fell
like she was breathing, even if Alex hadn't told me before there would have been no doubt in my mind what she was.
Her eyes settled on us with that same disinterested stare. No one moved. Not us,
not the corpse, and not the bodies on the floor. There was nothing but the sound of breathing,
and maybe the faintest whimpering cry from somewhere among the fallen.
Then, very slowly, without any sense of urgency,
the dead woman began to stand up.
I remember what it was like only vaguely,
like trying to describe a dream long after you've woken up from it.
As the woman got closer, I could see something in Alex Titan,
one so taut that it finally snapped.
She lunged forward, grabbed the corpse by its shoulders and began to scream into its face.
What did it want? What had it done? Demanding answers.
The dead woman with the shaved head ignored her grip,
leaned close to her neck and opened her mouth.
For a moment, I had visions of teeth sinking into Alex's flesh,
of arterial spray coating the clean white laminate,
but all that passed between them was a whisper.
Something soft spoken into Alex's ear.
Her arms dropped to her side, and she turned to look at me.
Her eyes were different.
They were still hers, and I could tell they still knew me, but something in them was gone.
As my gaze met hers, Alex gave a simple, small shrug.
So slowly it was as if every ounce of will she had went into that one small gesture.
Her head drooped, staring at the floor, and she gently lowered herself down to lie there.
And just like that I was on my own.
It feels strange to think that even then I couldn't find the strength to run.
If I'm feeling generous to myself I try to believe it's because I was unwilling to abandon Alex or maybe the thing had some power to keep me there but honestly it was fight, flight or freeze.
And I froze. I saw the dead woman approaching me,
smelt the chemicals that kept her from rotting,
saw her lean towards me,
saw her lips begin to form words.
In desperation, I slammed my hands over my ears
and shut my eyes,
willing myself not to hear, not to understand.
As far as defences go, it was basically nothing,
but I still think it saved me at least a bit.
I still heard the words.
The moment that you die will feel exactly the same as this one.
And in an instant I understood.
There's no difference between the present and the future.
No other me that will suffer the indignity of death while I live on.
It's all a single moment,
and there's no difference between that last moment
that ushers us out into oblivion and the one we experience now.
The promise of a cold and lonely eternity in the grave would have been a mercy.
At least it would be eternal.
But everything ends. Even
the universe. Even time. And that means it's always already ended. I felt every feeling
within me boil up. Anger, despair, joy, hope, fear. especially fear. They overwhelmed me and burned up with the monumental realisation
of the scale we existed on. Not the meaningless vastness of the universe, but the smallness
of it. And I realised I was in my bed. According to my phone, I had been for several days.
And I realised I was in my bed.
According to my phone, I had been for several days.
I numbly got myself some water and ignored my weeping mother.
She tried to hug me, but her arms just slid off my limp shoulders.
And that was my life for several months.
Eventually, the memory began to fade and I started to feel again.
I took the year out of university under the umbrella of medical reasons, and by the time I met you I was, well, I don't think I'll ever
be the same person I was before, but I had started being able to actually live again.
I never learned for sure what happened to the people in the medical science building,
or to the dead women. Someone said a police van and ambulance had
turned up in the night and taken them all away, but I couldn't find anything more on it.
None of them came back to the university, and I never saw Alex again.
There was one thing that never returned to me afterwards, though.
Since that day, I've never been able to feel afraid my fear's just gone
I'm not foolhardy
I can still recognise danger and I understand the likelihood of harm
but actual fear
is simply not something I experience anymore
and I've never been able to figure out if it was cauterised
or if it was stolen
so that's it I see if it was cauterised or if it was stolen.
So that's it.
I see.
That, um... I mean, that...
Explain some things?
A bit.
I can't believe you never told me.
Well, I can't believe you didn't tell me
you were on the run from the police over two murders, so...
No, you're...
You're right.
Are you all right?
You look like you're about to keel over.
No, I just...
There's been a lot of statements
in not a lot of time.
I'm exhausted.
I kind of wish I knew...
I knew even one person
who genuinely wasn't involved.
Maybe that's why you thought of me.
Hmm?
I mean, it's been years and there must be other old friends you lost touch with.
Maybe you did know.
Yeah.
Yeah, maybe I...
It's alright, John. You sleep.
I'll tidy up here.
Yes.
I, uh...
Yeah. The Magnus Archives is a podcast distributed by Rusty Quill
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Today's episode was written by Jonathan Sims and directed by Alexander J. Newell.
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