The Mel Robbins Podcast - Stop Taking Things So Seriously: A Hilarious Story About Wedgies, Wardrobe Failures, Art Museums, & Having More Fun

Episode Date: June 26, 2023

In this episode, you are going to learn the art of having more fun. I share a hilarious story about a major wardrobe malfunction with you and two podcast crew members. You’ll laugh along at all th...e ridiculous details, but the takeaway is serious: Learning how to laugh at yourself is a superpower, and research says people who have a sense of humor are more respected and are viewed as more confident and intelligent by their peers. Today you’ll learn: How having fun in life is an art formHow to turn something embarrassing into something hilarious and relatableHow humor increases power and statusWhy it’s important to not take yourself too seriouslyHow to create a bond and change the tone in any social situationWhy it’s imperative to never buy a bodysuit that is too small Seriously? You need to laugh more. Let’s start today. Xo Mel  In this episode, you’ll learn: 01:26: The best feeling in the world: taking your bra off at the end of the day3:52: Chris tells us what the equivalent feeling is for men.5:33: The major wardrobe failure I had yesterday.9:23: Pro tip: always test drive a cool outfit before an event (especially if it includes shapewear).12:09: The worst wedgie that I have ever had.14:41: I can’t believe I just admitted this, but don’t we all do this?19:20: How turning something embarrassing into something hilarious and relatable tightens bonds.21:18: Let everyone in on the joke, it will change the dynamic.22:24: My ultimate moment of relief.26:22: How turning something embarrassing into something hilarious and relatable tightens bonds.31:09: Why does Amy do stand-up comedy, and can you develop a sense of humor at any point?33:52: According to research, the funnier the person, the more respect and power you hold.38:08: I invite you to do this one thing: laugh at yourself.  Disclaimer

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey, it's your friend Mel and welcome to the Mel Robbins podcast. Let's do it. I am so excited for today. I came running up the stairs above the garage here in our studio in Vermont. And boy oh boy, do I have a story to tell not only you, but I'm sitting here with my friends and colleagues, Amy and Jesse. Hello. Hello. Okay. So I think we're going to call this a jump on a mic kind of episode because this is going to be super random, but I promise you there's a point to it. I have a fricking hilarious story to tell you guys. I can't wait. It involves a wardrobe
Starting point is 00:00:41 failure. Yes. That is super super embarrassing and really, really funny. Are you ready for it? Yeah. Okay, so first of all, I have a question for everybody. Is there any better feeling than taking your bra off at the end of the day? No, period. That's a let loose feeling. Yes, yeah. How would you describe that? Like, you literally reach back, unhook. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:01:11 It's like, do you ever get like the itchy, like, oh, you just want to rub underneath, like you just want to just a little shake, shake them loose? Yeah. Well, mine sort of fall like pancakes, flat against me, so. Gravity doesn't help, but yes, Yes, there's a good feeling. It's like, it just is like a giant. And you know what I wonder? Do dudes have a, like,
Starting point is 00:01:36 do they have like a let loose moment? Hmm. They might always be loose. Yeah. That's a serious question. It's a serious question. Is there a moment for a guy that feels as freeing as unhooking your bra? I think like you think about a guy in a traditional sense coming home from work, walk through
Starting point is 00:02:00 the door, first thing he does, loosen up his tie. That is not, I don't think it's through. What about a belt? A belt. I would say if the belt is quite tight and it's holding a lot in, that would probably be like, oh, God. Yeah, I just heard my husband pull in. There is. I have to ask Chris about this. I'm going to call him right now until I'm to come up here. That's hope he has his cell phone on him because normally he doesn't. Did you wear a shapewear at your wedding, Jesse?
Starting point is 00:02:29 I did not wear a shapewear at wedding. Isn't that when everybody does? It's your wedding night. You gotta have some quick easy access after that night's wrap. We can't be, we can't be scrambling to get that off. It's one thing to get the dress, I guess. But then like, that's gonna be super glued after a night.
Starting point is 00:02:45 No way. That's true. It's like this beige sausage casing that you're gonna roll. There was boob tape, but that's fine. Here he comes. Hi, baby. Hi.
Starting point is 00:02:54 Okay, so we got a question for you. What's up? There is almost no better feeling for a woman than to take her bra off at the end of the day. What is the equivalent for a dude? then to take her bra off at the end of the day. What is the equivalent for a dude? Of removing a piece of apparel? Just freedom, like you just are like, oh, well, I didn't play a lot of football,
Starting point is 00:03:19 but I would imagine removing a jockstrap would be a little bit like that. What about your bike shorts? So you've been out for a 70 mile ride, you're wearing a pair of padded bike shorts, your, yeah. My crutches, like on fire. Yes, yes, yes. When you roll that off like a pair of pantyhose,
Starting point is 00:03:37 what does that feel like? My balls hurt, they all deal. Yes. Yeah, that feels pretty good. Really? Yeah. You know, the amount of sort of abuse that my nuts are taking in the saddle on a bike ride is very different than your breasts over the course of a day, right? Well, I don't know. That's why I'm asking you. What do you think she does all day? I don't know. Where they're breasts. Well, there's some feeling associated with removing the braseer. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:04:08 Well, I just figured your balls, your doodle dads that you call them sometimes, that they just kind of drop a little and that feels very freeing. Yeah. Like I said, no different than, well, I guess for you, wearing spanks, there's nothing dropping. Right? It's just, but spanks, there's nothing dropping. Right? It's just, but yeah, that's a good feeling. I would love to know for you listening. Is there something that we're missing here that you feel is that moment of it's just like, at the end of the day, you guys are so creative
Starting point is 00:04:49 At the end of the day, you guys are so creative and very sort of interesting in your insights about these things. And so I guarantee you we're missing a couple, so I can't wait to hear what you write in about. But the reason why I'm telling you this story is because yesterday I experienced a moment of body freedom that was, I would say, maybe 25 times more liberating than taking a broth at the end of the day. 25. Wow.
Starting point is 00:05:15 Body freedom. Yes, it also involves a major wardrobe failure. Ooh. So let me tell you the story, okay? And as I tell you the story, I would love for you to think about some wardrobe failure that maybe you've had. Because these seem to happen to me all the time. I don't know what it is, but...
Starting point is 00:05:33 So here's what happens. So my daughters have recently introduced me to shapewear. I'm a huge fan of Sarah Blakely. Yeah. The Founder's Banks. I love her story. But I've never been, sorry Sarah, a huge fan of shapewear. And one of the reasons why is because when Spanx first came out, and this is not like a slam on Spanx, but when they first came out and I bought a high-waisted pair of bike
Starting point is 00:05:57 shorts, they could be gas. I don't know if that's like a new, I don't know if that's me, but I felt like the compression was so compressed or maybe I bought the wrong size that I felt gassy and crampy all day wearing shapewear. So I thought, okay, I'm getting gas, I have cramps. It's sort of like the same thing as when you were really high-waisted pants and you sit down and it's like a turn a kid on your stomach. Yes.
Starting point is 00:06:27 Yes. Cuts at the wrong spot. So I probably just bought the wrong style and wore it with the wrong thing. So I have not worn shapewear. Do you guys wear shapewear? I did. I have. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:06:41 And then we moved to Vermont. Yeah. You don't need it up here. That's true. Yeah. And then we moved to Vermont. Yeah. Yes. Yes. Yes. You don't need it up here. That's true. Yeah. You really don't let everything go.
Starting point is 00:06:50 No. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Just let it all hang out. No, I still have it. I can almost guarantee you that if I were to bring it in and show it to you and you were to take the way span and just kind of like flex it a little bit, it would probably disintegrate
Starting point is 00:07:03 because I just have to wear it. Yeah, yeah. So here's what happened. My daughter Kendall's up and I asked her she would help me go through my closet because I am trying to get rid of clothes that don't fit. And so I was trying on clothes and my daughter came to this conclusion
Starting point is 00:07:17 that the reason why I hate my clothes is because I have no shapewear and I have saggy bras. So she's saying she wear is essential. Yes, who, yes. I have no shapewear and I have saggy bras. So she's saying she wear is essential. Yes, yes. Enjoy the way you wear this clothes. Yes, and so she pulled up the internet
Starting point is 00:07:33 and she went to pulled up the internet. She went to Schemes, which is Kim Kardashian's line. And if anybody other than Sarah Blakely is gonna make shapewear, Kim Kardashian seems like the perfect person to do that. And we ordered a bunch of stuff. So it arrives, it comes in this box,
Starting point is 00:07:51 I pull this stuff out, I kid you not. It looks like Barbie clothing. That's how small it is. I pull it out, I'm like, this is not gonna fit me. Did you order the children's size? She's like, mom, this is perfect. This is exactly how it looks. I'm like, are's size? She's like, mom, this is perfect. This is exactly how it looks. I'm like, are you kidding me?
Starting point is 00:08:07 I can't fit my body in this. And so she coaches me through getting it on. And basically you stretch it to kind of loosen it up a little bit or at least before you have it. Or at least I had to. And then I stepped into it and you sort of like yank it up on your body. And it's a lot like pulling sausage casing up over your body. Very thin stretches out.
Starting point is 00:08:29 I put it on. She ordered me the thong. Okay, which I probably would not have done, but I got to give props to Kim Kardashian because the thong was not a string. It actually was like a landing strip. There was enough there, so it was not going to go right up my rear end.
Starting point is 00:08:44 And so I put it on and I looked in the mirror and I'm like, dang. It actually was like a landing strip. There was enough there, so it was not going to go right up my rear end. So I put it on, and I looked in the mirror, and I'm like, dang, this looks pretty damn good. I'm not going to lie. What did you think about those skims that I bought, the bodysuits? They look good. It looks kind of uncomfortable to me. It looks kind of little tight. I'm not sure I would go with that.
Starting point is 00:09:07 So here's the mistake I made. I tried it on. I'm like, this is great. And then I took it off and went on with my life. I didn't walk around in it. I didn't sit down in it. I didn't test it for real life. You have to test drive your underwear.
Starting point is 00:09:24 That is true. Actually, you do. You have to test drive your underwear. That is true actually. Yeah, yeah. Well, I did not know this. Yeah, so I mean, I didn't either. Fast forward to my wardrobe fail. Here's the story. And Chris, you've heard this horror show before. So if you want to blaze right now is a great time to bounce, but first, I just want to thank
Starting point is 00:09:39 you for coming up. So thank you, honey. You're welcome. We love you. Ladies and gentlemen, Christopher Robbins. Thanks for representing. Yes. Awesome. For the men out there. thank you, honey. You're welcome. We love you. Ladies and gentlemen, Christopher Robbins. Thanks for representing. Yes. Awesome.
Starting point is 00:09:46 For the men out there. Thank you, sir. OK. Are you too ready for this? Ready for me to go back to the story? Oh, yeah. Oh, my God. OK.
Starting point is 00:09:57 So I was in Boston because I was invited by a friend to go to this fundraiser at the Institute of Contemporary Art that was celebrating women artists and I was so excited to go, I thought, okay, this is gonna be a cool group of people. And a really cool group of women. So I gotta put on like a really cool,
Starting point is 00:10:21 I'm into art outfit. Oh, I'm into art, yes. So I told a pair of black pants that I have not worn in probably eight years. Now they're now today. Yeah. Now's the day. And they're very like stretchy fabric and they were the kind of pants that I wore when I had to go into corporate settings. So really nicely tailored, you can see everything in the rear end. So like this would be a great moment to wear my body suit, okay? Right? Yeah. And I've also pulled out a sweater that is a ribbed sweater, so it's tight, right? And the sweater is the boldest colors. So I'm
Starting point is 00:11:02 going for like the pop art look. I've got a black pants, I've got a black healed boots, and I've got on this tight ribbed sweater that is bold stripes. I look like human caution tape. It is white, and then it is yellow, and then it is brown, and then it is black. I'm like a bumblebee, kind of.
Starting point is 00:11:22 I love it. Yes, that's a good art outfit. You're making a statement. Yes, yes. I looked great. Yeah, yeah. And the shape we're pulled it all in, I'm like, this is great.
Starting point is 00:11:31 I look like I support art. I look really cool, but not pretentious. I got like the pop thing going. Wow. The color is all springy. Yes. And so I get in the car. Things are really good. I'm listening to great music. Things are
Starting point is 00:11:47 really good. I get downtown to Boston. Things are really good. I find a parking space in a parking garage, a couple blocks away from the ICA. Things are really good. I get out of the car. and going from sitting to standing up sort of made the body suit go from really good to not so great because that song started to turn into a wedgie. Now I get out of the car and I try to reach back and pull it down a little while I'm in the parking garage, right? Yeah. And I can't do it. That's a two-hand job.
Starting point is 00:12:28 Yes, but I don't know that, right? Plus the thing is starting in about five minutes, so I got to go. So I stick my hand down the back of my pants and try to just like move it down. Yeah. And that works. That works. Well, I am embarrassed to tell you what I did next, but I'm not telling you until after a break. Oh my God.
Starting point is 00:12:52 So, no, don't go anywhere. This is worth sticking around for. We'll be welcome back. It's your friend Mel. I'm here with Amy and Jesse, and I was just telling you how I was wearing this new compression wear body suit for the very first time. And it was looking, and it was feeling great, right guys? And I was driving into Boston,
Starting point is 00:13:26 and things were really good, but as soon as I stood up, I have this giant, painful wedgie in this public parking garage. And as Jesse says, in order to unlock that kind of bodysuit wedgie, that is a quote, two-hand job. You got to,
Starting point is 00:13:44 oh yeah, just yank that sucker. You need both hands there. Yeah. So being a newbie to this sort of situation, I did not know that. And so we are at the part of my story where I am sticking my hand down the back of my pants. And I am just trying to push the thong part down to move it down a little and
Starting point is 00:14:09 what do you think I did next? Did you wash your hands? No, I smelled it. I'm going to say that. No. It did not smell bad. I'm like, okay, okay. So why hold your hand?
Starting point is 00:14:26 Yes. Let me tell you something. What? Yes, but why? Why are we doing this? Why are we smelling it? Why would you smell it? I am about to walk into an event where I'm going to see my friends.
Starting point is 00:14:38 Yeah. And I don't want to give them a hug if I have poo pans. Yeah. Not like actual poo, but I don't want my hand to smell like that. Yeah, I can't say I've ever smelled someone's hand though. I know, but I just felt like it was smelled bad. Like there's something like not cool. Oh, really?
Starting point is 00:14:53 I am not worried about somebody. What is somebody that I don't know is standing next to one of my friends, and I hug my friend, and I keep my hand off of my friend. But then somebody goes, it's nice to meet you and they extend your hand. Well, it's on you for not putting some hand sanitizer on those hands sanitizer in my car. I just wanted to clear, I wanted to have a clear conscious
Starting point is 00:15:19 walking into this. Yes, check in your breath. Yes, check here. Just do that. Yeah. I get it. It is relatable. It is relatable. I think it's actually a very conscientious thing to do for others.
Starting point is 00:15:35 It is true. It is true. Okay. It's conscientious. I'll start doing that. But also a lot of people wouldn't admit that. So props to you for just telling all the details of the story. You know, getting into it. That's what I'm here for.
Starting point is 00:15:48 Yes. Okay. So, I'm like, okay, I'm good. I have five minutes to get two city blocks to an event that's about to begin. Yeah. And so, I start to walk. And I'm, as I'm, what's it called forward ambulation, that's what the neuroscientist call it. I'm forward ambulating as I walk. And as I'm walking, and I'm walking like I'm like, because I'm about to be late, I'm realizing as I'm walking, this fricking bodysuit is starting to slowly inch up. And the bodysuit is starting to give me a simultaneous wedgie in the front and the back, which basically means I had both a camel toe and a piece of floss that was starting to go up and up and up like a hammock from the front to the back. And so now I can't stride it out because I'm going to split myself in half.
Starting point is 00:16:43 And so now I'm shuffling as fast as I possibly can. So I don't want a big stride it out because I'm going to split myself in half. So now I'm shuffling as fast as I possibly can so I don't want a big stride. And I shuffle into the ICA and there is my friend and I walk right up to her and I give her a big hug and I whisper in her ear, I've got a giant wedgie in my body suit. I've got to find the, but where's the bathroom? She's like, oh my God, oh my God, that's a worse feeling. She's like a point of the thing and she goes, I'll save you a seat, okay? And it's like, oh my God, oh my God, that's the worst feeling. She's like the points of the thing and she goes, I'll save you a seat, okay? And it's all right, oh my God, I love you.
Starting point is 00:17:08 Don't you love friends like that? Yes. Oh, so I shuffled to the bathroom. This thing is so far up there, that I dropped my pants to the floor. And to your point, Jesse, this is a two hand. We've all been there. Yeah, yes. I have to grab both sides
Starting point is 00:17:28 front and back. Oh, I didn't start there. Oh, you started on your side. I started on the side. You know, I think that's a giant one. I needed some slack. Yeah. I needed to create some slack and some extra. This bodysuit showed itself to you as a as a Barbie outfit. You got it to expand. It was like the pumpkin turned into a carriage. And then all of the sudden, it's snapped back to Barbie suit for you. For you. Like at the wrong time, you know?
Starting point is 00:17:56 Like and so right back to the pumpkin and you haven't even gotten to the dance yet. And you're like, this is a difficult situation. So I get, you're in the sides thing. You need the slack. Yes. I think it was a good strategy. Yeah, I'm like, oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:18:11 Oh, you did a hard pull down. Pull down, hard pull down. Yes, because I wanted a couple inches. Yes. Okay. And plus this thing, it basically rolled up almost like a string, right? Because it was so scratch. Yes.
Starting point is 00:18:22 I have to flatten the landing strip back out, so it doesn't do it again. I just want to tell you, my heart is racing for this story. Like, I'm really feeling this. Like, I'm a little bit starting to sweat. It's very relatable. But, you know, here's the thing, and I have to give myself props. The old me would have just been like embarrassed and like, why can't you do that?
Starting point is 00:18:44 You know, you know, you know, you know? And I just was like, this is the crazy. I was laughing at myself. And that's so important in life to be able to whisper in your friends ear that you got a wedgie to be able to laugh at yourself as you're in a bathroom in like what you think is the best art forward outfit you've ever put on in a brand new body suit that you've never tested in a real life situation. But I am yanking it down on the sides to give me a couple extra inches
Starting point is 00:19:13 so that I can straighten out the middle and get it repositioned in place. Un-snaping, it was not an option because what happens when you unsnap a body suit? I, the snaps hit your teeth, it goes out so far. Yeah, basically rolls up like a window shade and plus this thing, like, I was afraid if I ensnap it, it's gonna hang out the front and the back
Starting point is 00:19:31 and God knows it's not got stuff on it because I don't have underwear on and I'm like, this isn't disaster. It has been up there. Yes, you don't know. Yes, and so I get it all positioned and the problem is that now as I'm pulling it down, it's pulling off my boobs.
Starting point is 00:19:46 Oh no. Like it's not on your boobs anymore. No, and so I have a long torso. I have a long torso. So I now look like, what is it, the Heineken or the St. Pauli girl? Oh, I know, I know. I think it's the right. And I've got a rib sweater.
Starting point is 00:20:00 So you can see the nipples and everything else. So I'm like yanking this thing. Oh, what a match. It's right. I tried to yanking this thing. Oh, what a match it out. I finally, you know, it didn't even occur to me. I could have just taken it off and been nude. It didn't even occur to me. I wouldn't have occurred to me either. You don't want to be that person at the studio.
Starting point is 00:20:20 Yeah, they were. Yeah, you don't want to be that person. So I get it all positioned. I of course wash my hands. Good. Everyone can exhale. Yes. And I go to the luncheon. And what's your attitude? Like I've got this or you like, oh, I've sold a bunch of people because like I think it's hilarious. And I think everything relate to it. I think everybody can relate. And I think a lot of to it. I think everybody can relate. And I think a lot of times people look at you
Starting point is 00:20:47 and they're like, wow, you know, she doesn't give her shit. She's got her act to go, what a badass. I think that's true. And then I have to give it to you, Mel. You take it up a notch. Not only do you not give a shit, but you make fun of your. So you know you let everybody in on the joke.
Starting point is 00:21:07 They'll tell people, I know joke. Guess what? I guess I do. But it's a relatable joke. And I guess. It's an interesting point that you just made about the kind of distinction between not giving a shit versus being able to laugh at yourself because they are related, but it's a different thing,
Starting point is 00:21:25 and I think both are really important. The not giving a shit part is the ability to whisper in your friend's ear. Yeah, that you have a wedgie right now. Mm-hmm. And to tell people the disaster just happened to the bathroom, right? And that is one layer that I think is really important.
Starting point is 00:21:42 And the second thing though, which has been very freeing for me, is just like loosening the grip and being able to laugh at these moments. And it's interesting because humor, we've done a lot of research on humor because of speeches that I've given or other projects that we've done for Audible. The research is kind of bananas. In fact, why don't we take a break? This is a great time to allow our sponsors to entertain you for a second. And let's dig into the research real quick while you guys are listening to a commercial,
Starting point is 00:22:18 because I think it's important to explain that humor is actually a really important skill in asset and life. Oh, yeah. And if I recall correctly, it makes other people think you're intelligent. They trust you more. It exudes confidence in the workplace. And I realized this was not in the workplace.
Starting point is 00:22:33 I mean, it was like a professional event. Yeah, but it was, it was, it was professional, though. It wasn't like you were sitting on the couch with your girlfriends. But there's all this research about leadership and teams when it comes to having a sense of humor. Now, I would not tell your boss you had a thong wedge you up your ass. I would not do that. Yeah. But I think there's a lot here to unpacked. And by the way, I'm not done with the story.
Starting point is 00:22:58 Oh my God, there's more. There's a lot more. All right. And I'll tell you all of it when we come back. Okay. There's a lot more. All right. And I'll tell you all of it when we come back. Okay. Welcome back. It's your friend Mel, and I'm here with my colleagues and friends, Amy and Jesse in our studios. And we're doing a jump on the mic episode, which basically means I rolled in here hot with a story to tell.
Starting point is 00:23:27 And now we're making something of it, but I was just talking about this wardrobe malfunction. And how having a sense of humor is such an asset in life. Where were we? So here we are, and then we gotta get to the humor thing, because I think that's the big takeaway here. Yeah. Laugh, laugh, laugh at yourself.
Starting point is 00:23:45 You have to be able to laugh at yourself. Because the second you start laughing at a situation, this is the most ridiculous thing I've got myself into. Why do you always do this to yourself, Mel? Like you can go two different ways, right? I could either be shuffling toward this museum, beating myself up for buying the wrong size, always getting it wrong, screwing things up, running late, or I can be laughing at myself.
Starting point is 00:24:09 And how ridiculous this is. Of course, I've done this to myself. Of course, I would have a thong up my ass the first time I am going to this really nice thing. And of course, I'm having a massive wardrobe problem. But this is not all. So as I'm sitting at the luncheon, it is slowly starting to hitch up again.
Starting point is 00:24:28 Oh no. While you're sitting in the sun. Yes. And so as we walk back to the parking garage, I'm with a friend, one of my closest friends, Lisa. And she's just like, stop picking at that wedgie. Stop picking at that wedgie.
Starting point is 00:24:39 You can't stop. Just unsnap the damn thing. And I'm like, I can't unsnap the thing. First of all, I can't unsnap it because I'm in a public space. Yeah. And trying to unsnap a body suit in a discrete way is next to impossible. No.
Starting point is 00:24:55 And so my only choice is to try to pick at it. And so we get down to the parking garage. Thank God. We go to her car first, so I don't have to walk that far, and then she drives me to my car so that I don't have to keep dealing with this. I get out of the thing, and I open up my car door and step behind it. I mean, I do have some good, I'm not going to like drop my pants, you know, and make Lisa watches. So I literally unsnap it. It rolls up like a window shade. Question, are your pants still down?
Starting point is 00:25:30 Are you able to do this with your pants? Oh, no. I have to take my pants down. They're down. Oh, okay. And I have to come squat and be your young down again. I'm gonna snap it.
Starting point is 00:25:39 Full breeze now. Oh my God. If you think taking a bra off, or a pair of bike shorts off, yeah, for you gentlemen out there, feels liberating. Try unsnapping a thong bodysuit that's too small. While you ate poach salmon and asparagus, I just wanted to stand there for a minute with my legs shoulder width apart. You know, just.
Starting point is 00:26:11 Yes. I just thought, it's expansion from all sides. It's like, you, that is the definition of let loose. Yes. Yes. You let it all loose. And sure enough, I button my pants back up. I step out from the side, the side the door. I shut the door.
Starting point is 00:26:31 Lisa is laughing hysterically because now of course I have the front part hanging down in front and the back part like a tail. And she's laughing and I'm laughing and I'm like, you gotta take a picture of this. You gotta take a picture of this, dude got to take a picture of this dude. Like this is hilarious. I got to remember this.
Starting point is 00:26:48 And so she goes, well, I got to back the car up so I can get a good angle. And I'm like, okay, so she starts backing the car up. I can't make this up and she freaking hits a parking pile on. So now I'm doubled over laughing with the unsnapped body suit hanging out of my pants. And I'm like, what should I do? What should I do? And she's like, just step over there and strike a pose. So I kind of put my arm up on my head.
Starting point is 00:27:12 I look like this exasperated freedom look. She snaps a photo. And when we look at it, we cannot believe it. I gotta show you this. Holy guacamole. I want you to look at the sign that is above me and read it to everybody. Caution, dead end.
Starting point is 00:27:37 And it's in black and white and yellow. And my sweater is a yellow, black and white striped bumblebee sweater. Yeah. This looks like some art director. Yeah, it's perfectly curated. Yeah. The way you did it.
Starting point is 00:27:52 Yeah. The fun. The angles, the depth. It's a work of art. It is the palette, the pose, really, with the nude skinwear too. Yeah. And when I love that it's all about humor, It's not like, oh, we created this awesome moment together. That was a putt.
Starting point is 00:28:08 It was just fun through and through. And when you look at that, you think Alisa, you think of laughing, right? Like you just... I think of women in art. You think of, I think of of Poach salmon. Right. I think of my friend Robin who invited me to this.
Starting point is 00:28:24 Yes. I think about shuffling across the harbor in the sea point. Like I just like think of all of it. And I also just laugh. And I will remember this moment for the rest of my life because of the humor. Oh, yeah. Right?
Starting point is 00:28:41 Turning something embarrassing and somewhat painful into something hilarious and relatable, shifted everything about it. And by the way, we will share the photo with you. If you're watching on YouTube, congratulations, because you've already seen it. If you are listening to this, just look in the show notes and we will link to this photo. And it kind of brings me full circle to this idea of, how do you develop a sense of humor? Because just like, I had to like, unsnap the whole that the body suited.
Starting point is 00:29:10 And it created so much freedom. Yeah. Yeah. When you unsnap the judgment and the seriousness that so many of us have, you're missing out on one of the greatest joys in life, which is learning how to laugh at yourself. Like it's one thing to not give a shit about what other people think.
Starting point is 00:29:27 And for those of you interested, we did an incredible podcast about the art of not giving a shit. Hugely popular. We'll link it to the show notes. But this is about something else. It's about allowing yourself the freedom to be human and learning how to laugh at yourself. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:29:45 And Amy, I want to bring you into this because you are a stand-up comic. You do improv. You actually perform on stages. Yeah, at an amateur level, but yeah, it is a skill. Becoming someone who looks at the world in a funny way is not just something that you're born with. You can really get funnier. And you can develop a sense of humor beyond anything that you think that you have right now.
Starting point is 00:30:16 And I think it's worthwhile. Oh, I do too. Like I think when you make fun of yourself, you allow people to bond with you over the shit that's relatable in life. I'll do it. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:30:28 If I had to give any advice about it, because I've always been so hard at myself and learning how to laugh at yourself, not in like a condescending like, ooh, but more like, that's fucking funny. Yeah. That's funny. And it allows other people in. And I think that's the thing that people miss. Yes. Well, that's the thing that I admire most about you. And I think that's the thing
Starting point is 00:30:48 that that stood out to me the most in this story is that you don't keep it to yourself and just say, Oh, right. Right. What? That this is really funny. I can't believe this is happening. You do not do things in a whisper, you know, you do them out loud and let everybody in. I can just imagine all the women at your table and you're saying, like, guys, I just, anybody else have a thong problem right now because I, you know, and then, and then people are not thinking about their own insecurities or judgments. Yeah. They're thinking about your stuff and laughing about it to share laughter like that, especially with people
Starting point is 00:31:25 you don't know or just getting to know, I mean, what a gift that is. And it goes like social media, like you posted it. Oh, of course. Other people would be like, oh God, I can only show the pretty pictures where I'm all done up. No one's going to know that I've got a massive thought I'm not going to talk about it. But Mel's like, no, no, here's my heart outfit with a wedgie. Yeah, I'm going to hang it out.
Starting point is 00:31:43 Yeah. And I also, that's also why I post the ridiculous photos of myself where I'm just in real life kind of hideous because I laugh at myself. Yeah, it's funny. Yeah, it's really funny. And here's the other thing that I just got, that the metaphor for not allowing yourself to laugh and not sharing that with other people, is your whole life becomes like you're wearing a bodysuit that's too small. It constricts you, it suffocates you, it cuts off your life force and your circulation.
Starting point is 00:32:20 And that there's something available to you when you lighten up. And we did do a little bit of research very quickly. I will link to the studies, but just the things that I jotted down are really important. Like first of all, people respect leaders that are funny, more than people who aren't. Yeah. And the research shows we believe that somebody with a sense of humor, I'm not talking about an inappropriate one, an appropriate sense of humor. We believe they're confident, we believe they're more powerful, we immediately raise up their
Starting point is 00:32:57 status, we think they're intelligent, and they tend to be somebody we like more because there is this like bond that gets created between somebody that cracks jokes, makes fun of themselves, makes fun of a situation that feels relatable and true. It's like letting you in on something personal. Yes. And here's another thing. When it comes to work, this is really interesting. 98% of executives, according to one study, said they would prefer an employee with a sense of humor. Wow. And 84% of those same leaders believe that people with a sense of humor do better work. Those are high numbers. High numbers. And I think it goes beyond that class clown thing. You know, it's funny is a power.
Starting point is 00:33:48 It's a super power that you can have. Yeah. It is, it creates a dynamic that two people or many people join in on that really changes your perspective of the world, which I think is fascinating. And I love it. I love how you could have just had this wedgie and felt really angry with yourself. And thrown the skin out, get it trash can in the parking lot.
Starting point is 00:34:12 But instead, we all get to laugh at it. You're laughing at the table with all the ladies. We're laughing about it now. And it's brightening my day and it's making my mood a little bit better. And it's a gift. day and it's making my mood a little bit better. And it's a gift, really is a gift. Well, I think that's the invitation to you listening. Is as you go through your day to day,
Starting point is 00:34:33 something embarrassing or funny is probably gonna happen. Just notice it and then notice whether or not you're laughing at yourself or you're laughing at other people. It could be as something, like, you know what happens to me all the time? I spill on myself all the time. All the time.
Starting point is 00:34:49 And when I do, I don't change my shirt or my pants. I just make a joke of it. Why? Because it's funny. Yeah. You know, we can all relate to it. And so there is an invitation here, whether it's a wardrobe failure
Starting point is 00:35:03 or it's something that you do at work today that's super embarrassing or it's the fact that you're talking to your kids teacher and all of a sudden you belch in the middle of the sentence and then you both burst out laughing. Or what about the time that I farted at work? And I thought Jesse was going to lose her mind. She was laughing so hard. We had to stop down work for three minutes, you guys, because she could not get control of herself. And so you know what I did? Next, the second I felt
Starting point is 00:35:33 one coming, I actually pushed it out because I knew if I did a second one, she would lose her goddamn mind and she did. And so I just feel like stop taking yourself so damn seriously. Yeah. Learning to lighten up and loosen the grip and unsnap the life bodysuit you got on yourself and be a little human. It lets people in. It lets up the pressure on you. It makes you more relatable. It makes it seem smarter and more confident because you are because it takes a person, the ability to look at life and those dumbass situations that happen and turn it into a joke instead of something to ruminate about. Yes. All right.
Starting point is 00:36:15 I'm off my soapbox now. Thank you. Welcome to my TED Talk. Yeah. It's great. And it lets more love in, which is what we're talking about all the time. You know, and if you feel like, oh, I don't have a great sense of humor, I can't make that funny.
Starting point is 00:36:31 You could still laugh at it. Laugh at somebody else's joke, you know, like help somebody else kind of get through their day with a smile or a little bit of that. Or your kids or the people you mentor. Or like teaching your kids how to laugh at them. What a gift. Yes, absolutely. Oh, you spilled all the how to laugh at them. What a gift. Yes, absolutely. Oh, you spilled all the whole box of cheerio.
Starting point is 00:36:47 That's hilarious. And then you put the chocolate sauce on top of them, and now it's all over your, and you rolled in it. You guys were so funny. Yeah, like that's just a great thing. Amazing. You know what else is going to be funny? The bloopers on this episode.
Starting point is 00:37:02 Yeah, epic. Alrighty. Yeah. In case nobody else tells you, I'm gonna tell you, I love you, and I believe in you, and your ability. The laugh of yourself, you got this, we got this. Ladies and gentlemen, loosen the tie, take off the bra, pull off the bike, sure it's unsnap the body suit, let it all hang out, and laugh a little.
Starting point is 00:37:23 I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you.
Starting point is 00:37:32 I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you.
Starting point is 00:37:40 I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love. My mic, Amy. Yeah, well, you wanna know. But Amy, down. It's what my parents would say all the time. Just put her down.
Starting point is 00:37:50 My God. Just, you know, don't let her feel good. I'm just kidding. Woo! Oh, I'm so glad you tuned in today because I'm rolling in here hot. I thought you were gonna say I'm rolling with my homies. Ah, ha, ha.
Starting point is 00:38:03 But no homie. What the hell is that sound? Oh my god. Can you hear that, Andrea? That's a big piece of machinery. Yeah. I'm a huge fan of Sarah Blakely. No, that's not her name. Yeah. No, that's the famous actress. Blakely? Blakely?
Starting point is 00:38:20 Blakely. Who am I thinking of Sarah Blakely? Sarah Blakely. Yeah. Blakely. Yeah. I immediately had a fan act that I was saying her name. Yeah. Will she? OK, let's go wash your hands. Body suits for everything.
Starting point is 00:38:41 Oh, and one more thing. I know this is not a blooper. This is the legal language. You know what the lawyer's right and what I need to read to you. This podcast is presented solely for educational and entertainment purposes. I'm just your friend. I am not a licensed therapist and this podcast is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist or other qualified professional.
Starting point is 00:39:10 Got it? Good. I'll see you in the next episode. Stitcher. you

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