The Nateland Podcast - #113 College pt. 2

Episode Date: August 31, 2022

This week the guys continue their talk about college by looking at the cost of tuition, acceptance rates, secret societies, party schools, and whether "funner" is a word.     Podcast produced by ...Nate & Laura Bargatze Recording & Editing by Genovations Media https://www.natebargatze.com https://www.allthingscomedy.com https://www.genovationsmedia.com Email - Nateland@NateBargatze.com   Lectric eBike - LectriceBikes.com ·       Where will your eBike adventures take you? Go to LectriceBikes.com and get $100 off any eBike purchase ·       That is LECTRICeBikes.com   Mizzen and Main - MizzenandMain.com   Mizzen+Main just turned 10, so they’ve got great deals running on their site all summer long. Right now, if you go to MizzenAndMain.com and use promo code NATE, you’ll receive $35 off any regular price order of $125 or more.   That’s $35 off when you go to MIZZENANDMAIN.com and use our promo code NATE.    Athletic Greens - AthleticGreens.com/Nate Right now, it’s time to reclaim your health and arm your immune system with convenient, daily nutrition — especially heading into the flu and cold season!  It’s just one scoop in a cup of water every day. That’s it! No need for a million different pills and supplements to look out for your health.  To make it easy, Athletic Greens Is going to give you a FREE 1 year supply of immune-supporting Vitamin D AND 5 FREE travel packs with your first purchase.  All you have to do is visit ATHLETIC GREENS.com/NATE. Again, that is ATHLETIC GREENS.com/NATE to take ownership over your health and pick up the ultimate daily nutritional insurance!

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 hello folks welcome to the nateland podcast there we go hey bear welcome to the nateland podcast i'm here with brian bates aaron weber dusty slay uh glad to have you uh back this week i'm in the audience not you know everybody was here not y'all uh it was a fun week vandy big win super excited that's the biggest win i could remember seeing vandy have i mean 62 to 10 or whatever 63 get it right aaron, Aaron. My bad. I'm sorry. Yeah. We're not Notre Dame. Y'all can only get to 62. Yeah, dude.
Starting point is 00:00:51 It was super exciting. Hawaii was favored. I believe, right? No. No, we were slight favorites. I don't understand how that looks. I thought it looked the other way. But no one expected that.
Starting point is 00:01:03 They got up first. Seven to nothing. Seven to nothing. It was like I was having to, I was in Massachusetts, and I couldn't get the CBS network. Like, I couldn't get it to watch it. And so I was kind of having to follow it because I was doing a show, and I was following it all the time. But every time I refreshed it, dude, it was like we just went up.
Starting point is 00:01:22 And I've never watched Vandy like that. It was very cool to big air i mean it was like i would refresh it in like a minute there was one point where i we it was like a touchdown fumble cover touchdown and we scored again and i mean it was just every time i refreshed we're 49 50 and i'm like i think we I think we scored 35 points in the third quarter. Third quarter, yeah, five touchdowns. Yeah, 35 points. Yeah, third quarter, I just could never not do it. Every time I refreshed was just another one.
Starting point is 00:01:57 I mean, I was, you know, man, opening a season like this is just, we don't get that. And I'm super excited about it. Go SEC. Yeah, go SEC. You know? And you've got a nice stretch here where you could really stack some wins up, too. Elon, Wake Forest will be – I mean, they're ranked. Northern Illinois, Alabama, I think easy.
Starting point is 00:02:18 Yeah. Ole Miss, hard. No. Georgia, easy. Yeah. Yeah, that'll be a tough run right there once you get past that will north illinois but it's it's the tone was set which is very nice we're number one in the sec right now and that's huge uh i don't see how we lose that spot number one offense in the country
Starting point is 00:02:37 like the last eight games are it's like wow yeah what a run yeah well it's like, wow. Yeah. What a run. Yeah. Well, it's the SEC. Yeah. And, but it's, I mean, just super, super fun. I think every SEC team's now got to look at Vandy. They're like, all right. Like, it's like, it's not just going to be this easy thing. Yeah, you're a real team. We're a team.
Starting point is 00:02:59 We're a team and we're going to be a problem. How, do we go undefeated? I mean, probably. I think so. I'm looking at the schedule i don't see where the losses are well as a traditional vanderbilt fan elon's probably yeah where it's gonna be so we got one hard game left elon and then after that it's a cool breeze to the sec championship huh i'm pumped all right i't wait. Alright, I love it too. Welcome everybody.
Starting point is 00:03:29 I was in cough more into the mic. We don't have a cough button. Our theory is to just go directly into the mic instead of maybe leaning back or turning or just doing that.
Starting point is 00:03:48 He pulled it forward. He pulled it forward. Almost cone it. Give me two seconds. Almost cone it. Guys, give me two seconds. I'm about to cough and sneeze
Starting point is 00:03:55 and I thought I would do it this way. We had, I had a fun weekend. My last kind of outdoor shows this weekend and we were in Toledo, Toledo Zoo. Great, I had a fun weekend. My last kind of outdoor shows were this weekend,
Starting point is 00:04:10 and we were in Toledo, Toledo Zoo, great, great zoo. They showed us around. Harper and Laura were with me. We saw a bear, grizzly bear, very big. That's fun. They are big. They are so big. In looking at a bear, did you feel like that you could juke it? I mean, they're so big. In looking at a bear, did you feel like that you could juke it?
Starting point is 00:04:28 I mean, they're so big. I mean, I know Joe Rogan shot that down so fast, but I still got to think, I mean, you know, Barry Sanders is not a deer. I think I'm definitely still giving it a go. Yeah. If the one's charging me, I don't think I'm going to stay. What are your other options? I don't know. I think you got to run straight sideways.
Starting point is 00:04:50 That's what I've got to think. Because it's like Joe was saying, it's like a truck running at you. Well, if a truck's running at you and I run straight sideways, maybe at an angle kind of backwards, it can't turn. Not saying it's not going to flip around. Now, a bear, a little more agile than a truck. But if both case scenarios jumped in front of me, a truck running at me and a bear, I'd figure if one's going to do one, you might have the other. Moving is a good option in general.
Starting point is 00:05:21 Yeah. If a truck's coming at you, you don't go, I got no chance. Just stand here. Even if he swipes you with the claw, you know, it's like maybe you can get away. Yeah. The claws are crazy. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:05:33 It'll hurt. It'll hurt. Yeah. It'll hurt. But I'm not saying I'm not going to try it. Right. Yeah. Now, was Eric with you at the zoo?
Starting point is 00:05:42 Yeah. Okay. Someone emailed and said they saw Eric and Harper walk around the zoo together okay someone emailed said they saw eric and harper walk around the zoo together oh yeah i was like okay i guess eric's a nutritionist barber babysitter we that was i had to go to sound check and uh uh harper where they wanted to see the wolves and i wasn't able to go so eric and they went and the wolves so i mean everybody there at the zoo i can't think enough they were cool. We got to do a lot of stuff. We got to feed a lot of animals.
Starting point is 00:06:07 And they were just very nice. And that's the fun stuff. My daughter gets to go see all this kind of stuff. And so they were awesome. And that venue's awesome. I love these outdoor shows. I mean, we got very fortunate. We never had weather problems.
Starting point is 00:06:27 They had a weather problem in Cape Cod where I was because I was Hampton Beach, New Hampshire. That place is awesome. That venue is like a ballroom kind of type, but it's an awesome, awesome place. And we played. Oh, that's what I meant to wear. We went to a casino at and an aces and eights casino in new hampshire and you can go play we played with uh we played blackjack but it's only it goes like the money goes to some of the money goes to charity or something so you can only it's
Starting point is 00:06:57 five dollar minimum ten dollar max which is uh it's a pretty solid yeah i think anybody can walk up to that table and they feel all right. Like, you know, can't go too crazy. Yeah. And it was, but that place was very cool. And I could have a sweatshirt from there. I mean, where? It's on the bus.
Starting point is 00:07:16 So, and Vandy won. So I was like, you know, I got to do what I got to do. Yeah, yeah. But it was, yeah, that place was great. And then Cape Cod, the Melody Tent, it's in the round, which was nice. My special's in the round in Phoenix. So it was nice to kind of be able to do that before the special. And that crowd was so, I mean, all of them were just so pumped.
Starting point is 00:07:40 It's been so nice. So, I mean, everybody that's come, you're the best. You're the best. Did you make it to the Wilson County Fair? I that's come, you're the best. You're the best. Did you make it to the Wilson County Fair? I did. Oh, you did? I did make it to the Wilson County Fair. Wilson County Fair is great.
Starting point is 00:07:52 If you're here in Nashville, go to the Wilson County Fair. It's awesome. I love a fair. Does Davidson County not have a fair? They used to have the Tennessee State Fair, but now they just joined with Wilson County. They just couldn't compete. Wilson County's just doing it right.
Starting point is 00:08:08 They're just like, look, we can have it. They have a Williamson County Fair. I've been to that one. It's fine. It's fun. What makes the fair so great? That's my... All that fair food is the best. I like a funnel cake.
Starting point is 00:08:24 I'm into it. Funnel cake. I get the Walkin' Taco. It's like the best. Okay. I like a funnel cake. I'm into it. Funnel cake. I get the walking taco that's in the Frito bag. Right out of the bag, yeah. I mean, that's maybe my favorite thing I've ever eaten. And it's just very fun. It's all there in the bag. Funnel cakes.
Starting point is 00:08:37 You know, the kids are riding the rides. You're going to watch them ride the rides. You're talking them into riding the rides. You know, I don't know. Harper did good. She rode a lot of stuff that we didn't think she would ride. And then all the nieces and nephews, they ride everything. So I think a fair is just, you know, it's almost like maybe it's the last thing
Starting point is 00:08:59 that doesn't feel corporate or something. Oh, yeah. I wonder if that's the feeling of it. Because it's like, I mean, I know it's like sponsored, but it's not sponsored by, you know, Coke, Coca-Cola or something. It's sponsored by all the local kind of stuff. It's like run by the local stuff. It's like everything in the world has to be so perfect.
Starting point is 00:09:21 Commercialized. Commercialized or like been perfect with rules and all this kind of stuff and it's the last affair is the last kind of like it's a little loosey-goosey going a little renegade place a little renegade you don't know what's going on here yeah yeah if anything's gonna go wrong it might go wrong out there a lot of people on probation working at the fair exactly yeah my whole family works there and there you go exactly that's why some loosey-goosey might happen because you never know my sister volunteers was, was there every day, loved it. They do it just for the free tickets to get in.
Starting point is 00:09:49 Oh, yeah. Short of a 12-hour shift to get $5 off a ticket. But they love it. My mom won a car at the Wilson County Fair one year. Really? All right. What kind of car? Buick LeSaber.
Starting point is 00:10:01 Okay. That's a fair car. Yeah. She had to choose. There was like five cars that different dealerships put up, and then they have a drawing, and they call her number the very first time, and thousands of people try to do this, of course, and she won. What year?
Starting point is 00:10:20 This was like 10 years ago. I don't know. Does she still have it? She just got rid of it recently. Yeah. I had a 1982 Buick, let's say, where I drove for a long time. Oh, wow. Yeah, big car.
Starting point is 00:10:33 Did you lose something? Well, I lost my other car to a car accident, and then my mom just had this one laying around. Trailer. Y'all have multiple cars. Yeah. It was just. Took the cinder blocks out from underneath it.
Starting point is 00:10:48 Yeah, you had to get the carburetor worked on. Is trailer parks probably the most cars around? There are a lot of cars. Yeah, there is a lot of cars. A lot of back out park over here. You got a lot of moving. Well, you got multiple people living in one trailer, you know? And they all got a.
Starting point is 00:11:01 But sometimes people don't have cars because they don't have a license. So you'll just see them sitting around on their steps where do you park at well you park in the driveway yeah yeah or the you know the backyard anywhere on the grass yeah we didn't have a lot of grass we had a real sandy yard oh yeah it's hard to mow up a trailer park yard too and because of again because a lot of trash laying around and you never know might kick up some a lot of weed eating yeah you can weed eat a yard yeah yeah and you don't really need a lot of lawnmower yeah you weed eat it but also we had you know stuff lying about yeah that you would gnomes yeah yeah we had a say you know during the desert storm war i had a sand yard so it was like really set up for all my desert storm uh army men that i had i mean it was great we had our own little thing going on yeah they're g.i.j.os and
Starting point is 00:11:50 you would play to the war that was happening oh yeah yeah yeah he'd reenact it yeah so right now this would be you know russia ukraine yeah you'd really be giving it a go yeah i mean yeah oh yeah it'd be a great time out there but i don't know i don't know what the the terrain looks like that's true i don't really know what ukraine terrain looks like yeah it's tough to say tough to build a city out of it was easy when that one was yeah because you're just sand and i was like well i already got that going on yeah yeah my trucks are the same color as this. It was really a lot of fun. I bet you hated when that war ended. Yeah, I mean.
Starting point is 00:12:27 Well, luckily it lasted for quite a while. So you got enough play out. Yeah, by the time it ended, I joined the Army. Yeah. I mean, I never got in, but I did join. Did you join? I did join. I got arrested.
Starting point is 00:12:39 Oh, did we talk about this? Oh, yeah. Did we? I think maybe a little bit. Yeah. We didn't go into too much detail. Well, it goes well with the college episode of today because after i dropped out of college i you know joined the army okay and then didn't get in all right well we're we're talking about
Starting point is 00:12:54 when we get to the college episode uh what was it at the fair yes you had that yeah i was i was uh gonna ask if you guys had ever won anything i I mean, maybe not a car, but anything in general. Just you've been picked. No. No, I've never won anything like that. I was trying to think of if I had. Even a contest of free donuts or? Mm.
Starting point is 00:13:16 I didn't mean that because of you. Yeah. You don't have to think so big. Did you win? Well, those are all words that he. Have you won a free donut contest? You enter a lot of donut contests. You win a free donut contest with yourself, and you just go buy the donut.
Starting point is 00:13:35 You wake up every morning. You go, God, I'm all... I win. You put your number behind your back. You go, won. You go, oh, free donut. Have you won anything? i don't think so yeah i mean i'm sure i've won something but nothing really comes to mind nothing so big that i was like you know i've done some scratch offs here and there back in the day and i might have won five bucks or so but how
Starting point is 00:13:59 many times do you think you've been on the local news well not not uh i want i mean for comedy a few times yeah you know they never really featured me on anything growing up okay it was a tornado that went through my dad's town and my dad got on the news oh yeah yeah so my dad got on there it was a lot of fun that's fun his neighbor was on there crying and then my dad you know was making fun of him a little bit he goes come on give me a break over here yeah yeah yeah i mean because my dad had insurance that guy didn't have insurance and that guy's crying about his fence and my dad was like hey you know you wouldn't tell me lose something that's a right attitude. Yeah. Yeah. I like that attitude. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Some stuff happens, sometimes it doesn't. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:14:47 All right. I was with Henry Cho Saturday in Crossville, Tennessee, and last night I was in Murfreesboro at New Vision Baptist Church doing Date Night with Brian Bates. Just for couples. Oh, what's that all about?
Starting point is 00:15:03 It's just a couples thing. They're couples ministry, so I was performing. They called it Date Night with Brian Bates. Just for couples. Oh, what's that all about? It's just a couples thing. They're couples ministry. So I was, they called it date night with Brian Bates. Some people were really disappointed, but it was a fun time. Did you just stand up? Yeah. Disappointed because they wanted to go on a date with you and then they found out you're just doing comedy?
Starting point is 00:15:18 Yeah. All right. So it was like a couple. So it was, yeah, like couples. So date night, like wife, husband come out. Yeah. For their, to kind of launch their, I guess, couples ministry or something. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:15:30 It was fun. Yeah, that's cool. I was in Tulsa, Oklahoma at the Looney Bin. Had a lot of people come out. That was fun. I wish I had a more interesting thing to talk. The shows were all great. I was expecting some of them to be awful.
Starting point is 00:15:44 I was sitting in the back dreading them. they were all pretty nice yeah some people got kicked out but that was before i got on stage so it was smooth sailing for me oh yeah that's nice yeah it was a great weekend there you go i'd like to say i was at the loony bin uh years ago the tulsa loony bin and um the when i every time you take a shower a bath, the condo would get like all flooded. Oh, really? And I told the manager about it and he goes, yeah, that happens. Yeah. And so I asked Aaron, I was like, hey, was the floor still doing that thing?
Starting point is 00:16:14 And he was like, yeah. So for years, it's just flooding every weekend. So like when you take a shower. It's just, there's a patch of carpet that's just wet. I mean, in the kitchen it had circle, like the square tiles, and you would step on one and water would come up from in between the cracks. So it's leaking from underneath somewhere. Yeah, I don't know what's happening, but I'm just shocked that that's still happening.
Starting point is 00:16:39 Yeah, is it a condo? Yeah, it's a house. How is it? It's not bad. Yeah, the house is not bad besides that, yeah. Besides probably, yeah, real structural damage to the house in that way. Yeah, mold and breathing that in. It is pretty nice.
Starting point is 00:16:52 Other than that, solid state. Yeah. Yeah. I went to Naples, Florida off the hook. It was great. I've heard a lot of people talk about that club in a negative way, but I had a great time. It was very fun.
Starting point is 00:17:04 I enjoyed it too. Yeah. When I went down down to naples naples is a cool spot it's like uh i think it seems like older people go there and stay but i think naples is a great place to for retirement you know yeah and that's why it's you know a popular spot yeah i mean it's a weird mix of people. I mean, you got, you know, but it was great. I mean, the audience was like, one show was like very old. But that was one of my favorite shows of the weekend. I used to do a lot of shows for old people in Charleston, South Carolina. And so I like it. If I see it's all old out there, I just kind of like get into like grandson mode. You know, like I'm like, I got to be respectful to these people.
Starting point is 00:17:45 Yeah. Right attitude to have. Yeah. Yeah. You know, like I'm like, I got to be respectful to these people. Yeah. Right attitude to have. Yeah. Yeah. I did a show with Dusty. This is a few years ago in Egg Harbor, Wisconsin, for a bunch of old people. Yeah. They were very old, and Dusty was not having fun.
Starting point is 00:17:56 I did not like them. It was the least fun I've ever seen him have during a show, and he gets to the point where he's going to do his merch pitch, and I'm in the back watching Dusty. He just picks up his shirt and looks at it. He goes, nah. I was howling laughing in the back. That was the funniest thing I'd ever seen.
Starting point is 00:18:16 I got off stage, and the guy had my check. I don't think he was like, oh, I know you're upset. Here's your check. He just had it ready, and I just grabbed the check, and we beat people from the show out to the parking lot i mean that's a funny one that's a fun one that when you when you you just get off stage and you're gone i love the interaction like the whole night everybody's kind of got their own separate you all just want to get to the car and go yeah we want to get out of it was the room was too well lit so you could really see people so i could just
Starting point is 00:18:50 see people not enjoying themselves i didn't feel like it was a bomb but it was like quick laughs and i just hated it yeah i don't know what it was, but I hated it. What's your hat? Aaron Webber's hat. Oh, this is the Augusta Pimento Cheese. Minor League team? Yes, they're a minor league team. Oh, that's cool. That's their name? The Augusta Pimento Cheese?
Starting point is 00:19:15 Well, these minor league teams do alternate jerseys with a food that's relevant to the city. So I guess Augusta, Georgia. Pimento Cheese because of the Masters. Yeah, Pimento cheese because the masters yeah yeah pimento cheese sandwiches it's a lot of fun yeah that's fun all right uh let's start off with you guys comments uh richard gatling nate going on a rant about the gap year sorry i'm doing the mic nate going on a rant about the gap year and then proceeding to change his mind is the
Starting point is 00:19:45 reason I listen. This podcast was right on the money line. Boom. Boom. Yeah. Nailed it. Linda Vedders. This was the most Nate way to do a college episode by not finishing it.
Starting point is 00:19:58 Oh, yeah. Love that. That's a good little slam there. Yeah. There is no part two in real life. Dustin Gaddis. Just for the record, there's no such thing as a three-sided pyramid. That's interesting.
Starting point is 00:20:12 I guess because it would be four-sided. Actually, it would be five-sided. Oh. One, two, three, four. I don't know. Did we say there was a three-sided one? Yeah, we kept calling it a three. We were talking about triangles, but we kept calling it a pyramid.
Starting point is 00:20:25 Oh, okay. Which are two different things. That is true. Because there's no way for it to be three-sided. You could do three-sided. You could, but there'd still be, you've got to count the bottom, too. Well, that's the bottom. That's not really a side.
Starting point is 00:20:42 Yeah, then what are we doing? Yeah, I mean, the side is the side, and then the bottom. That's not really a side. Yeah. Then what are we doing? Yeah. I mean, the side is the side, and then the – Okay. That sounds like a college thing. Yeah, I think so. The people that built the pyramid, it's like, well, it's got three sides to it. Then someone that did nothing goes, technically, the bottom's the side. Somebody coming in saying, technically.
Starting point is 00:21:00 Technically. Technically, the bottom's the side. You go, okay. Well, only if it's turned upside down or flipped over. That's why that guy didn't have to carry any of the bricks, because he's smart like that. Amy Copeland. Whenever Nate talks about his 17 on the ACT,
Starting point is 00:21:17 I think about the quote, everyone is a genius, but if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid. There are many different kinds of intelligence, and you guys are certainly comedy geniuses. All right. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:21:33 I appreciate that. Thanks, Amy. If you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree. You've got to ask Fish that. So for you, climbing a tree is math and reading. No, I think I'm the tree and the fish is everybody else. We're all trying to get to your level? Just completely misread the metaphor.
Starting point is 00:21:58 So yeah, I'm the tree. So I'm the tree. That's beautiful. That's beautiful. That's beautiful, Amy. The fish is math and reading and I'm the tree. That's beautiful. That's beautiful. That's beautiful, Amy. The fish is math and reading, and I'm the tree. Amy's at home pulling her hair out right now, like, no, you idiot. Amy, you're something special.
Starting point is 00:22:17 Yeah, no, the tree would be the math and reading, if you judge me by that. Probably some other stuff. A lot going into that tree. Yeah, there's a lot in there. I think the ACT was right on the money. Hunter Grafe. The national average for the ACT is 20.3, not 18. I'd like to see Aaron actually score after a comment like that.
Starting point is 00:22:41 Wow. Yeah, let's see the actual scores. Let's see some proof here. Let's see it. I have a hard time believing Hunter knew that number off the top of his head. He looked it up, found out the exact number, and then presents it as, you idiot, you didn't know. I also agree with that.
Starting point is 00:22:57 Yeah, that's true. But I also did confidently say it was 18, and that was wrong. Yeah, I bet he could think it wasn't 18. For sure. That's what he looked it up. But then you've got to look up the specific number. There's no way he knew it was 20.3. Yeah. I bet he could think it wasn't 18. For sure. That's what he looked at. But then you got to look up the specific number. There's no way he knew it was 20.3.
Starting point is 00:23:09 Yeah. But he's like, it's more than 18. What's the highest score? What did we determine? 36 is a perfect score. Okay. And the national average is 20, huh? Mm-hmm.
Starting point is 00:23:20 Good thing I didn't take it. Yeah. Summit for everybody. Yeah. I didn't even... I think it costs money to take. It does take money. And I was like, oh, no, I'm't take it. Yeah. It's not meant for everybody. Yeah, I didn't even. I think it costs money to take. It does take. And I was like, oh, no, I'm not doing that. And a lot of these kids now, they're paying for,
Starting point is 00:23:31 they're taking classes to learn how to take those tests. Oh, yeah. I never even got that. Neither one of my parents were like, you should take the ACT. They were like, I don't think they knew what it was either. They were like, what, 40 bucks? Nah. Yeah. Well, I never took the SAT because I knew I wasn't think they knew what it was either. They were like, what, $40? Nah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:23:45 Well, I never took the SAT because I knew I wasn't leaving Tennessee. Because the SAT is for out of state, right? Oh, is it? I don't think I ever took the SAT either. I thought the SAT was something we took every year. I thought the ACT, I thought it was. I thought it was like your last two years or something. Wasn't the SAT like a Scantron?
Starting point is 00:24:06 Multiple choice? That is a type of test. Standardized testing. Standardized testing. Scantron is literally the sheet of paper that you fill out and then it reads it through a machine. You take the PSAT when you're a junior usually, the pre-SAT. And then senior year, you take the SAT.
Starting point is 00:24:27 I feel like in middle school, we were taking an SAT of sorts. We took the – you can take the ACT in seventh grade. Yeah. You can take the SAT in seventh – You can take the – a lot of kids will take the act in seventh grade to just like i don't know why just to see where they're at just to see what's going on yeah but those those are just yearly standardized tests those aren't the college admissions tests we had to take some aptitude tests one year uh we were all in the uh in the performing arts center of the school and like the
Starting point is 00:25:02 army was there for some reason and they were like yeah right, you don't have to take this test if you don't want to, but you have to come up here and sign a thing. And so this girl, I remember, uh, uh, Rebecca, she came up, she went up first, everybody cheered for her. She signed her name. And then like, just everyone started going down there and signing up. And then they were like, all right, all right, all right. Actually, you do have to take it. Like, I guess they didn't expect people to say no to it. Yeah. And then they were like, all right, all right, all right. Actually, you do have to take it. Like, I guess they didn't expect people to say no to it. Yeah. And then they were like, you do have to take it. So we all had to take it.
Starting point is 00:25:30 And it was something to like tell us what we're supposed to be or whatever. Do you remember what you got? I don't remember. I don't. I was excited about it. I was like, oh, good. Finally, some direction. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:25:42 Yeah. You get to know where you want to go. Yeah. But I don't know that anything came out of it i think it was all like you should join the army yeah it leans to clean an army pretty heavy right you have to do something spectacular to not get yes yes when the army's in one doing yeah yeah. Yeah. Like you have to juggle. Like if my dad went up there, he'd be like,
Starting point is 00:26:08 I can see a magician. Yeah. You're the only one. Because don't mention it. If anybody asks, say Army. Say we said Army. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:26:16 But get into it. Get into magic. Kyle Yarber. Aaron incorrectly identified Notre Dame as the first to perform a forward pass in a game. That's such a funny comment. I mean, he didn't provide any other details.
Starting point is 00:26:31 It was literally just Aaron was wrong about this. I think he provided a screenshot where he Wikipedia'd it. I think Notre Dame was the first team to really perfect it. Yeah, well, that's what we're talking about. But it wasn't the first game. No, you said invented, I think, last week. These comments seem to really be coming at Aaron here. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:26:50 There's a lot more. Well, listen. Yeah, you bring the education to the table. It's like, did Henry Ford invent the automobile? No. But did he? I mean, yeah, kind of. He's the first guy to really do anything good with it that's what we
Starting point is 00:27:07 are to the yeah henry ford probably killed a guy that invented the car well we're yeah isn't tesla that's like tesla that whoever tesla is tell us the truth dusty what's going on i don't know but i you know whoever invents a thing never really gets the credit you know somebody comes on goes oh that's cool. And then here's $10. Get out of here. And they whack you in the head. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:27:28 They steal your idea. Henry Ford, did he kill someone? Aaron, go ahead. He probably did. Notre Dame, actually, a lot of Notre Dame's traditions are like that. Play like a champion today, which I'm sure you've heard of, that sign. We weren't the first school to do that who did that it was oklahoma i believe they had a play like a champion
Starting point is 00:27:49 today sign yeah we took it and we made it iconic that's what we do yeah every good idea take it make people's ideas and do better things with them yeah jokes like jokes yeah you don't have to waste your time creating no why do that yeah you're marketing that's right. You don't have to waste your time creating. No, why do that? Yeah. You're marketing. That's right. Yeah. We don't create the product, but we will deliver it to the world. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:14 Who did this so no one knows the four-pass school? No, it was some very small school. I can't remember the name of it. It was SLU, St. Louis University. That sounds all right. And they don't even have a team anymore. So it's like, well, you know. Yeah. It's like if you steal the jokes from a comic who's died yeah who cares right but they
Starting point is 00:28:30 were still alive when they stole it well this is like two years later that's why they killed themselves yeah we can't go back in time you know that's true we have to live in the present all right uh maverick pitchfork, that's a real last name. Even slew is like death in the past, right? We slew you. I don't think it is. It's like past tense of sleigh. You're saying that's the past tense of your last name?
Starting point is 00:28:56 Yeah, slew. They were slewed. They were slewed. Oh, they were slewed. Yeah, I think so. Yeah. All right. What happened to them?
Starting point is 00:29:03 They were slewed. Destined to be slewed with a name like that sounds better than slayed because what would you say they what happened they were slayed last night they were slain slain yeah they were slain yeah oh that reminds me of remember 10 years when that family was Sloan? Yeah, I like that. It's like that. Yeah. Maverick Pitchfork. Just saw Aaron in Tulsa. I bet it's a real name. Just saw Aaron in Tulsa. I thought it was hilarious when Aaron mentioned that he hosts a podcast with Nate Bargetti
Starting point is 00:29:38 and didn't even mention Briarpatch. Well, I think it's hilarious that Maverick didn't even mention Dusty. It's true. Well, I'm trying to sell a shirt that says Aaron Land on it and I said, has anybody heard of Baitland and one person woos? I'm not going to turn it around by going, well, Brian Bates is on it.
Starting point is 00:29:57 Now have you heard of it? You do the Hulk Hogan and everybody's like, alright, okay. I was trying to figure out what Briarpatch was. That's me. You do the Hulk Hogan, and everybody's like, all right, okay, okay. I was trying to figure out what Briarpatch was. That's me. Okay. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:30:10 He didn't even capitalize your name. Yeah. He's a longtime listener, so. He did lay me out there. Matt Lazari. Dusty, with the best line of the episode, grants are just scholarships for being poor. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:30:24 It is. It is true, though. Yeah. Yeah. It is true, though. Yeah. Yeah. It's like, congratulations. Yeah. Like, all right, we know you can't help it. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:30:31 Get in here. I like it. Yeah. Yeah, that is nice. And it's a good name, grants. Like, a grant sounds good. I got like a half grant, you know, because I sent in my mom's W-2 or whatever. And then they wanted my dad's. And my dad, you know, he does better.
Starting point is 00:30:51 But my parents are divorced and my dad was not going to pay. And I'm like, why do you want that? He's not helping. Yeah. That's what my dad did to me. My dad goes, all right, I'll pay for half of your tuition. If you get in, you sign up, I'll pay for half. So I go, I went and got this Pell Grant that paid for half. And I told my dad, I go, hey, I got half. He goes, all right, will you come up? Now that you've got
Starting point is 00:31:16 that grant, you come up with the other half of the remaining and then I'll pay that. So I was like, oh, I just came up with half. You keep coming down on the money. Do you really want me going to college? I mean, what's happening here? Yeah. You figure it out. And then he saw through it. He's like, well, that's not your money. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:31:35 He should have said, I'll pay for it all if you finish it. I'll reimburse you. Yeah. Well, he knew better. He knows his son. Yeah. Angie. Nate, who filmed a pilot based on his life, said about the bodyguard,
Starting point is 00:31:52 I just don't care about his life. Show me the bodyguard stuff. I don't want to listen to your phone calls with your wife while going to the grocery. Solid point. I mean, yeah. it makes sense but I think it's like I want it's when I want action I just want the action
Starting point is 00:32:13 sitcoms are different I'm not putting sadness in my pilot that went nowhere Carlin Holder Nate would love to hear you talk about some of the people that were in your community college classes with you. I bet the money line that you had some funny interactions. I don't remember.
Starting point is 00:32:33 My buddy, P, Jeremy, he went with me. Deval State? Yep. Everybody feel P left jeremy his nickname's p uh just so if anybody hasn't heard that let me say that uh i remember one time he was always very on time he wanted to be on time and he was like p went to it's who i lived with me we lived in western kentucky and all that uh but one time phil uh our buddy philip he's meeting at our house my house and we would drive to vol state and so uh p's like tells phil philip he's like be there at this time and i mean if he would always
Starting point is 00:33:20 tell the story or no it's funny your car pulled into college. Oh, yeah. I don't know why. It's community college. All right. This is funny to me. Oh, we'd go to college. We'd go hang out at my house after. We'd eat tostina pizzas when we got home. I mean, I love them.
Starting point is 00:33:37 And so Pete would always wear his watch upside down, like on the inside, so he'd look at that. And so he's like, we were leaving at 7.30 a.m., whatever, I'm making up the time. And he goes, you got to be there at 7.30. And so, I mean, P, it hits 7.30, and he goes, Phillip's not here. So we pull up my driveway and go to the stop sign,
Starting point is 00:33:59 which is the next house down. And we see Phillip's car there. And then P just goes, well, I told him 7.30 there and then p just goes well i told him 7 30 and then just drove off wow yeah and left him and philip had to just laugh about it because it was just i mean i was like telling p i was like he's right there though we just could wait one second he goes no he's got to learn and then so he just philip drove on his own the whole way yep yep i love it i kind of respect it, dude. Yeah. He set the tone.
Starting point is 00:34:26 It's like the next week he would have been two minutes late. Then the next week would have been five minutes late. He saw it coming a mile away. And yeah, so he set the tone. This is when I would run shows in town. It was always the battle of like, do we start on time or do we wait until people are there? Yeah. of like do we start on time or do we wait until people are there yeah and it's like well if you don't start on time then the next time they're gonna they know it starts late and then they just keep getting there later and later it's like we gotta just start on time yeah and respect it oh
Starting point is 00:34:56 you but with you're talking about with uh comedians open mics yeah yeah showing up yeah not like an audience i mean you're waiting for an audience but it's like we yeah we got to start even though it'll it'll be a better show in 15 minutes yeah we got to start right now so people will know hey hey the show will start don't reward the late audience exactly yeah i was doing a club though one time and and it was so low this was years ago the attendance was so low and it was above a restaurant that the club was like oh there's a table downstairs that has there's like 20 people they have a reservation here at the club we're gonna wait till they're done eating to start the
Starting point is 00:35:35 show yeah because they would made up so much of the audience yeah and it was like that's when you feel pretty unimportant. Yeah. They're finishing up their meal, so we'll wait. And it's just like whoever. Yeah. You're like, oh, is that the mayor? You're like, no, no, we don't even really know who he is. Yeah. But he's got a lot of people.
Starting point is 00:35:56 They have 20 tickets. They have 20 tickets. And that's going to make a big difference in this show. Yeah. And they know they won't start. Yeah, that's interesting. I tried running one open mic. It was the worst one in town at the-
Starting point is 00:36:09 The hotel? Yeah, I can't even think of the name. Maxwell House. Yeah, Maxwell House Hotel. Dusty came maybe once. Oh, I did come, yeah. I think Dad did. Did I do it?
Starting point is 00:36:16 Your dad did it. Yeah. You stopped in once just to look at it. He walked in, looked around. I'll see you later, man. Yeah, it was just me and brian and there was always more comics than people in the audience but we did a show once and there was nobody there so we were done like after 50 minutes and then this group of people came walking
Starting point is 00:36:38 in they're like oh we're just here for the show and you guys are done so they sat down and we just did it again yeah everybody just started over we all did our sets again this time for an actual audience oh that's fun yeah yeah that's like a rehearsal yeah and then do the show yeah everybody bring everybody do the same material they bring it you bring it more yeah we didn't bring it much the first time. Alex Karnick, funner is not a word. I say funner. I probably say it all the time. Yeah, I don't think it's bad. I'm looking it up now.
Starting point is 00:37:13 There are lots of historical examples of people using the word funner or funnest. Well, I think it's interesting that people that people like who decides what a word is well i googled is funner a word and the things i read said yes i mean who decides if you if people are saying it then it's a word yeah but it's if it sounds it's like it it does sound like it's not a word it sounds like saying you know pac Pacific instead of specific. Well, that's just completely incorrect. Supposedly instead of supposedly. But Pacific is still a word.
Starting point is 00:37:54 I don't think those are good examples. I think they're pretty good examples where it's like, yeah, it just sounds bad. It sounds like saying schmanana instead of banana. Oh, yeah, I guess that is the same. Like strategery, a word that you say at first funny and then it just becomes a real word? Strategery is a good example, yeah, yeah, yeah. But that's not a real word at all. But over time it might become.
Starting point is 00:38:17 Sometimes it's not more fun. It's funner. It's funner. Oh, interesting. You know what I mean? This is funner. It's not more fun. Yeah. More fun than what? This is funner. Oh, interesting. You know what I mean? This is funner. It's not more fun. It's funner than more fun.
Starting point is 00:38:26 Yeah. More fun than what? This is funner. Yeah. You having more fun? I'm having a lot more funner. Yeah, if you mean this is funner, then yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:38:38 I am having more fun. Here's what Merriam-Webster says. The fact that funner and funnest exist does not mean that you should use them without expecting that it will strike some people as peculiar. Name Alex Karnick. Yeah. So this is exactly. Alex does not care for it.
Starting point is 00:38:54 It struck him as peculiar. Yeah. He sat there. He put his pipe down and goes. Wait a second. Yeah. His glasses down. His monocle.
Starting point is 00:39:04 Yeah. His monocle. He's like, Beth he's like uh bethany come here he called his wife in they did they rewind the record player he somehow has this podcast on a record on vinyl i don't know how but alex is crushing and then he goes sit with me for a second because did they just say funner that's not i found that word peculiar is that how you say peculiar peculiar yeah that's peculiar if you write them in a term paper expect to receive disappointed size and underlined corrections in equal measure from your teacher this is an interesting thing they're saying look is right, but it sounds like it's wrong, so just pretend it's wrong.
Starting point is 00:39:48 Well, that's how we got where we're at. Living in a world of make-believes out here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just don't cause trouble. Just do what it, just do what, that's like, that'd be a teacher that just is like, just do what it says on the paper. I don't care. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:40:05 And if you went and said, but it says in this that we can use that word they'd be like i don't know and they're like listen you can but people will think it's peculiar and don't tell them you took my class yeah and don't and you go all right well i'm not having any more fun anymore. This is not my funnest class. Yeah, yeah. I wish you were funner. That's what I would say. Yeah, yeah. I wish you were funner.
Starting point is 00:40:32 Okay, that's enough. Ezra Lerner. With college football season here, I was curious which parts of Tennessee, roughly, root for Vandy versus UT versus Memphis, in addition to three schools, home cities. What? I think he means – addition is not the right word there. I think he means like regarding like Tennessee –
Starting point is 00:40:52 I mean Nashville, Memphis, Knoxville. Yeah. Well, Tennessee is probably the most. By far. By far. Yeah, for sure. And then I would say Vandy's second. Over Memphis?
Starting point is 00:41:02 Yeah. But I don't – I would think so. Yeah. I went to – I grew up a Vandy fan. I couldn't get into Vandy because of the money or the grades. So I went to MTSU, had a great time. I want to mention this shirt. Some folks run Lightning's Locker Room, the bookstore at MTSU.
Starting point is 00:41:18 They sent me this shirt about two years ago. And so they probably either don't work there or stopped listening to the podcast. But I want to thank them for sending this to us. But everyone at MTSU when I was in college was a Tennessee Vols fan. It drove me crazy. I'm very supportive of whoever the home team is. I'm like, come on, guys, we're MTSU. And they're like, nah, we're Tennessee fans.
Starting point is 00:41:41 They would wear Tennessee stuff. So growing up, I was just a Vandy fan, and I was the only one because I didn't know Nate at the time. Then I went to MTSU. Everybody's still a Tennessee fan because that's when they were really good. I was there when – Late 80s. Yeah. 82, 84, solid season.
Starting point is 00:41:57 Yeah. Yeah. 82 to 84. Exactly. When I was dating a lot. Yeah. Now, I was there right before Peyton, when Tennessee was really good. Heath Shuler, remember him?
Starting point is 00:42:12 Yes. Yeah. Johnny Majors. Yeah. Yeah. So, who was, I know Vol State had a serial killer. Did anybody else famous come from Vol State? I Googled famous people from Vol State and just had your picture.
Starting point is 00:42:27 Does it? Does it really? Yeah. Well, not just you, but. I don't know. My buddies all, I mean, a lot of them played baseball. Their baseball team was very good. I think Billy Wayne Davis played Vol State, didn't he?
Starting point is 00:42:41 Baseball? Yeah. What is this, a student? Yeah. I mean, it isn't even. Where did you see me? I wasn't Wikipedia. It was just famous people from Vol State.
Starting point is 00:42:52 Under images. Oh, maybe. Famous people. Well, wasn't there one that just said famous people who attended Vol State? Right there? Where? The one in the middle. No, this was community college.
Starting point is 00:43:04 Did you know that, Brian? No. I can't read. No, this is community college. Did you know I write, Brian? No, I can't read. Well, I found it. Oh, okay. Who was the most- Dolly Parton. She went to a community college, it looks like. Maybe not.
Starting point is 00:43:21 No. I don't know if she did. A lot of famous people did go to community college. I looked that up. Yeah, I would imagine. Yeah, because that doesn't work out, and then you're like, well, I'll try something else, and then fame works out. Yeah, you could almost say most.
Starting point is 00:43:37 I wonder if there's more famous people that went to no college or community college. I would think so. Because you've got to go whatever you're trying to do to become successful. You've got to start it soon. We say most famous people are actors. Yeah. Or athletes.
Starting point is 00:43:51 The highest concentration, yeah. Yeah, but you wouldn't count athletes because a lot of them go to college to play. Yeah, but a lot of them, baseball, right after high school, a lot of them don't go to college at all. Yeah, but I would imagine way more go to college probably and uh these actors never go to school though yeah so they don't even go to school when they're kids basically well ruth went to stanford and she has a uh yearbook which we never had in college but her freshman year yearbook in her freshman class was she was i was flipping through it Tiger Woods
Starting point is 00:44:25 Reese Witherspoon Fred Savage the kid from Who's the Boss can't remember his name the guy from the show This Is Us it's like a who's who
Starting point is 00:44:36 of wow just people in her freshman class wow that's amazing so maybe they do Danny Pinturo
Starting point is 00:44:43 yeah Danny Pinturo either Harold or Kumar I think it's Kumar oh okay Wow. That's amazing. So maybe they do. I don't know. Danny Pinturo. Yeah. Danny Pinturo. Either Harold or Kumar. I think it's Kumar. Oh, okay. One of those guys. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:44:53 Wow. All right. Big time. So this is our first announced we were going to announce to you, part two. I think so. Did people like the part one? Yeah, they loved it. I think so. Did people like part one? Yeah, they loved it. They loved it.
Starting point is 00:45:09 They liked your gap year take. All right. They liked you taking up for the common man. That's what we're here to do. We're the common man. Well, they didn't say you were, but they appreciate you taking up for them.
Starting point is 00:45:20 I'm the common man. The greatest average American. The greatest average American. Yeah. That's what, I don't know what else to tell you. Really great John Conley song, too, by the way. Common Man. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:45:31 I don't know that one. It's the best. I got to name my new special, and I don't know what to name it. Oh, that's fun. Didn't your greatest average American came from a riff on this podcast, right? Yeah. I've said it, American came from a riff on this podcast, right? Yeah. I've said it. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:45:46 But it was on this. I've said it before. Like, just like I've always like jokingly said it, but it came from this podcast. Ooh. So, but it's like, I like the, like the, you know, before it was like the Tennessee kid. It's the greatest average American. So it's like, it's almost like it's, I'm not doing it from a joke from my special, but it's like describing like, oh, this is who we're watching.
Starting point is 00:46:11 Right. And that's what I like. So you went from Tennessee to America. You got to go world this time. Or at least continent. Yeah. At least, yeah, North America. North America's funniest dude.
Starting point is 00:46:22 North America's, yeah. The funner dude. The funner dude. The most funner. One of the funner dudes in North America. North America's funniest dude. North America's. It gets, yeah. The funner dude. The funner dude. The most funner. One of the funner dudes in North America. Yeah, yeah. But it, yeah, I feel like it's got a, yeah, I don't know.
Starting point is 00:46:36 It's hard. It's kind of a fun problem, though. Yeah. Right? Yeah. To think of, yeah. What's a name you're special? I don't know. Yeah, Aaron.
Starting point is 00:46:43 A lot worse to have a bunch of names and no specials. Yeah. I can name them. You don't know what problems are. You think you got it hard. I wish I had your life. I didn't have to worry about where my special's going to go, my third hour special, Aaron.
Starting point is 00:46:56 God, I didn't have to name it if I was just sitting like you. Just easy breezy, no specials on the books. Not a care in the world over there. God, that'd be nice and easy. Yeah. But yeah, it's got to be the Tennessee Kid. Yeah, I mean, I like both of them. But it's got to be, you know, it's like along those lines.
Starting point is 00:47:17 I don't want it to be exactly that. So I don't know. Maybe someone has an idea. Yeah. I'm sure we'll get some ideas in the comments. But you got to think, the Tennessee kid, the greatest average American. I don't want to be arrogant. You know, it's like, the greatest average American is funny to say that.
Starting point is 00:47:39 But I don't necessarily want to go down that road again. Exactly that. Yeah. You know, so something along those. I've been around the county. Yeah. You know. Maybe scale it down.
Starting point is 00:47:53 Go backwards. The county fair. Yeah. The king of the county fair. That would be, feels like a U title. Yeah. Explorer of the county. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:48:03 Yeah. Yeah. I remember the Tennessee kid. We were just really looking at names. And before then, I don't think I knew any specials that didn't have some reference to a joke in it. So every name, at least I was coming up with, was some reference to one of your jokes. Yeah, I thought about that. But it's like I haven't done it, so I kind of don't want to.
Starting point is 00:48:26 And I like it just being maybe it's the state of mind or it's the whatever it is. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know. All your titles have been great. I mean, Yelled At By A Clown and that photo. That's a good one, yeah. It was so great. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:48:42 Those were from the jokes, Full Time Magic. Full Time Magic, yeah. It was so great. Yeah. Those were from the jokes, full-time magic. Full-time magic, yeah. Those are both from the jokes. But then it was like when Netflix was good at switching with, they're trying to make someone click on it. They won't know what they're – So it's like, all right, why am I clicking this? It's Tennessee kids like, okay, it's a guy from Tennessee, whatever.
Starting point is 00:48:59 The Greatest Average American is – it kind of says it in the title what it is. What you're like, oh, you can kind of guess what it's going to be about. And so that's what this would be. It's great for SEO, too. If you type in Tennessee comedian, it's like, it's you and nobody else. For what? SEO?
Starting point is 00:49:19 Search engine optimization, yeah. Computer speak. Yeah. Who says that? Do people say that? SEO is a pretty common one, yeah. Computer speak. Yeah. Who says that? Do people say that? SEO is a pretty common one, yeah. Yeah? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:49:30 Common among a circle of people, yeah. Yeah. I'm not in those circles. Are you in those circles anymore? A lot of my friends are not SEO. I think so. People are saying SEO in your world now. SEO is important in our world, in our industry.
Starting point is 00:49:43 SEO is important. Yeah. If I type in, I want to come up on Google. I want to rank pretty high. SEO is important for like in our world, in our industry. SEO is important, you know? Yeah. If I type in, I want to come up on Google. I want to rank pretty high on Google. Well, you type in Tennessee Comedian, see who comes up. Well, yeah, let's do Tennessee Comedian. I bet it's five pages of Nate and then maybe Dusty. I'd just like to see if I even come up at all.
Starting point is 00:50:00 I hope it's me. Please let it be me. Yeah. I mean, you literally come up on the right. Yeah. Nate Bargetzi, American comedian. Got the whole state. American comedian.
Starting point is 00:50:09 It's all Nate. What if I'm just that? I'm the American comedian. That's the title, American comedian. And they go, what's it about? You go, he's an American comedian. Yeah, your SEO is crushing it. There you go.
Starting point is 00:50:23 You know what I mean? Yeah. I'm getting into it. Yeah. Yeah, just call is crushing it. There you go. You know what I mean? Yeah. I'm getting into it. Yeah, just call it SEO. SEO. Call it. Yeah, yeah. You'll be number one everywhere.
Starting point is 00:50:33 I've heard Andrew Santino saying up, I guess, he tried to name his first album Taylor Swift. Yeah. But they wouldn't let him do it. But he wanted it just to be Taylor Swift, so when people Googled Taylor Swift, his album would come up. Yeah. I feel like he would still get drowned in the search results for Taylor Swift, though. Probably.
Starting point is 00:50:50 Yeah. That's how I think Barenaked Ladies, that's why they named themselves that. So they would put that on a billboard just to get people to come in. Oh, yeah. Barenaked Ladies tonight at the bar. I think with all that stuff, though, you still have to have
Starting point is 00:51:05 an act yeah sure it's a bunch of disappointed people it's that's i always have a weird bounce this is a weird bounce that you do want people to do it but it's like if anything starts feeling like a trick then kind of back out and then go do another thing that's what i believe yeah because it's like you don't you can get a road down to tricks where you're just and then you're only thinking of like kind of like how can i get people to come to this and then and then you're whatever you're creating starts creating for that and well then now you're creating now you're you you've messed your own self up right because now you're only going down this path of going trying to get views that's why like uh i understand like you want views and you want videos and all this but like your mind can't just completely go to that because then it's like you're yeah because if it's clickbait and then
Starting point is 00:51:54 the video's not good you've just tricked people into watching a bad thing and now they're mad about it yeah they've been tricked yeah but sometimes because the clickbait can be good i mean look that mr beast like they said he does clickbait but he actually does it and so that's different because it's like he's doing something that it looks like a clickbait but then you watch him do the thing that is but i mean i'm just saying like creating i was thinking of it as comedy is it's not that you you need to be aware of that you need to do stuff that like that but uh you know like dane cook did it like my space he was just everywhere but he just put his videos up and was everywhere it's like it's not like you don't i'm saying don't put videos it's just it's the creating of the material you got to think of your if your mind is creative
Starting point is 00:52:42 so you're going to be able to create wherever you go and you just don't want to spend all that because that becomes, I think you're chasing views and then you're like, and then you just end up down this road and then you're like, all right, you're not where, I mean, unless you want to do that, do that. But it's a slippery slope, I think. Yeah, you want people to watch because they like what you're doing. Yeah. Not because they were searching for Taylor Swift and found your album. Yeah. Okay. I mean, I don't know.
Starting point is 00:53:15 That's what I mean. I was going to name mine Katy Perry. Yeah. I think it was mostly just a joke. Yeah, yeah. I think Santino's great. I'm not upset with him. No, I'm not talking about that. I'm not talking about Santino. I think he's – no, Santino's great. Yeah, I'm not upset with him. No, I'm not talking about that.
Starting point is 00:53:25 I'm not talking about Santino because I think he was joking. But it's – I'm just saying in general, I think it's – that gets – I think it's, I don't know, short-sighted of your career. Not you, but in general. I think people that go that way can be very short-sighted. I mean, it's a fix. It's a high. You're going like, wow, this one's got a bunch of views,
Starting point is 00:53:50 and then you're chasing those views. And then you're creating stuff for your stuff you create is to make someone just look at it for a second and scroll by. Well, now there's too much of that. So no one's really grasping onto that. If you have an act, though, I i mean if you're going to do it at least and you can get people in the door that act better be something yeah and then you then it then it could work but i think a lot of people don't have an act they do they get that and they go see them live it's like well this is not what i wanted and you know i don't
Starting point is 00:54:21 know sometimes i think people don't even know what they want though and then they just want the picture if someone's famous on the internet they'll sit through whatever just for the picture so they can post it on the internet and get their likes for being with a person that's famous on the internet oh yeah you know yeah well there's a lot more commentary about famous people now i feel like than about then famous people like it's there that that field is there's a lot of like i mean you look at everything meet with all media it's like the media is so big now and all it is is about talking about people that are actually doing things so it's like it was almost like people that want to go up and be you know there's going to be journalists that want to be
Starting point is 00:55:05 true journalists and i understand that but it's like in general like the you know somewhat the mainstreamish kind of thing is like well we're all just like want to you almost like it's easier to go what's easier for me just to talk about famous people because everybody wants to hear like someone's opinion on something so that's a much easier route to take. And then you can become famous. That's the thing with SportsCenter. SportsCenter was like, that's why it just got like, you're like, all right, these dudes are famous. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:55:35 And they go do an interview. Well, the energy is different. Because now they don't feel like they're interviewing an athlete. It feels like they're just being like, I'm more famous than you are. And you are and then you're like well i don't even then who cares about your opinion like you're not giving this guy's uh like going on morning radio or something and like sometimes people are really great and other other times it feels like the radio host is like trying to out funny you yeah or and it's like i'm just here to try to promote a show. I'm not trying to take your job.
Starting point is 00:56:08 Just chill. Let me be funny for a second. I did one of the first radio interviews I did. The guy just goes, all right. So what comedians do you hate? I don't, I like everybody,
Starting point is 00:56:20 man. Yeah. I don't want to just trash somebody. Yeah. That I could maybe meet one day. Yeah. Well, it's, it's very negative yeah yeah and it's you're you know i get it i like i mean i guess yeah i don't know that's like just straight up like look i'm just trying to get yeah i'm just get something his own click something right yeah aaron weber hates these comedians. Yeah. But that's what I mean. And if you go that route, that's where
Starting point is 00:56:46 it ends up. Everything has to be... You just get to a point where you bluntly ask... You know, you're like, I'm not going to... Like Howard Stern was, I feel like, very good at that. It's different now, but when he was doing interviews and when it was like a while ago,
Starting point is 00:57:02 he was very good at getting the headlines but he would get it in a normal way it's like he would interview and then he would talk about something crazy with the celebrity and he'd go back out not talk that crazy then he would act like the interview's over yeah and then he goes we got to wrap it you know and then that's when more crazy would come but it was like that was that's like where it should be done and now But it was like that was – that's like where it should be done. And now there's a lot of bluntness now with social media, with internet.
Starting point is 00:57:34 There's just like I want – look at all the videos of just trying to get reactions or like the guy – isn't there a guy that goes up and like hits people or something? There's all kinds of those guys. Like that kind of thing. Those pranksters. Those pranksters where they're like, no, there's a camera. You're just going up and hitting people. Like we've gotten to that point. We used to have prank shows to now it's like, well,
Starting point is 00:57:50 let's physically assault someone. And then if they go try to fight me, I act like they're crazy. Yeah. Because I'm filming it. Yeah. There's a guy that goes up and like makes weird noises in people's ears in the store. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:58:02 I like it. Yeah. It's so weird. I mean, that's not even you're you're rewarding uh just arrogance like the arrogance that you someone will go do that and be like i'm crazy and that you know eventually we're always going to start watching people jumping off cliffs you can watch people i'm gonna set myself on fire and and die and you're like all right like i mean what are we doing doing? There's no entertainment at all.
Starting point is 00:58:26 It's just kind of like the shock value. That's the whole idiocracy thing. That movie where you get to that place where it's like you're just sitting in a chair and just watching the dumbest. I mean, we're there. Oh, we're at that point. But luckily, that's why I think when you go out and you have an act, the country is not like this everybody's everybody's a normal person every city and state
Starting point is 00:58:50 i go i can't go to anymore i don't want to go to alaska like i mean but it's like i've been to so many for 10 years and all these people and they're all different political views different whatever everybody just wants to have a good time and laugh and then move on. That's it. No one needs to be, I don't need to be in, like, they're not coming to me to be like, what moves should I make or whatever. It's like, I can't tell you what to do. Like, I don't even know what I'm doing half the time.
Starting point is 00:59:17 But it's gotten to that level, you know, where it's like, I don't know. People are making like 10-second videos. And you're like, well, I don't want to wait. They don't want to waste their time. So if I'm setting up a prank show, I don't want to go. You know, it's a long thing. If you watch the old prank shows, I mean, it's probably a very long day. It's like, well, I don't want to do that.
Starting point is 00:59:37 What can I do? Well, I'll just go hit someone in the face. I can go do 12 of those today. And then I'm going to get a bunch of views that's a season right that's a season took you how long did it take 18 minutes even when tiktok went from one minute to three minutes i was like i don't have time for this yeah i mean i mean people are just singing songs they're lip singing or they're doing the comedy bits on the like i mean there's actually no incentive to create something really it's just like find something you like that someone created and i mean even the world
Starting point is 01:00:11 of creation uh music you know i mean music getting written by who knows what like but all the guys that there's people writing these songs and they're just like they go give it to who this person that person sings it and it's like oh it's emotional and you go give it to this person. That person sings it. And it's like, oh, it's emotional. And you're like, I mean, someone – it's emotional because a regular person wrote that. Someone that's not famous and lived – that's why the song is so good. And they've really tuned in on how to make it sound emotional.
Starting point is 01:00:35 Yes. And then they go and then they just find – it's like they find a robot that's like, well, here's this person. You're like, all right, you sing that. And I mean, those are the songs I like. I'm not better than these p like you know i get it it's like i get i'm entrapped in all this kind of stuff but you see it to where you got to go you want to start that's right i've really originality is like the older i've gotten and i've it's been i've been doing that for a while it's like you just want someone that's like original yeah and i know it's
Starting point is 01:01:04 like well hitting a guy in the face is original. You're like, but that, I mean, it's not. It's, you know, if you don't have the time to go, I don't know, do something. There was a Justin Bieber song one time that was pretty popular. And it was like something like, my mama don't like you and she likes everyone. And it's like it had this real acoustic kind of vibe to it. And it felt like, but it's like, listen to that. like i don't even think about justin bieber having a mom much less his mom meeting his girlfriend do you know what i mean like he obviously has a mom
Starting point is 01:01:35 right but it's like he's just such a uh a musical machine that's been out for so long that it's like listening i'm like i don't even think about it's not believable to me that Justin Bieber is introducing this girl to his mom and his mom doesn't like him. You haven't humanized him enough in your mind to imagine his family. Right, exactly. I mean, this could be on me,
Starting point is 01:01:56 but I'm just saying when I listen, it just seems emotionless. It seems like they've manufactured soul to go into songs to where you're like, it doesn't really have soul to it, but it feels like it has soul. Yeah. I think you need to see Bieber live, dude. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:02:12 You're going to feel that soul. Okay. I bet it's awesome. Yeah. I saw at the Grammy. This is not just about Justin Bieber. I mean, in general. It's general.
Starting point is 01:02:19 Yeah. Look, there's enjoyment is enjoyment. Right. I'm going to enjoy this stuff. That's why you're going to enjoy it. You can go to Disney World. You can go eat candy. These things are obviously enjoyable.
Starting point is 01:02:30 I like them. And Justin Bieber would be technically a phenom in that world of like if you're going to write stuff and give it to someone, well, you magically found a person that's perfect for it. And that's why his career has lasted as long as it's lasted. Justin Timberlake. These people can, I'm not saying that, I don't know. They might write all their songs. I have no idea. I don't even listen to words of songs.
Starting point is 01:02:53 So I like a lot of songs that are just kind of fun. I don't need, I don't take in songs like that just because I'm an idiot. There's a class this year at the University of Texas, college, call back there, studying Taylor Swift songs. That's what the class is. Wow. Looking at her songs. College seems great. Yeah, I mean, what is that about?
Starting point is 01:03:20 I think it might be like some type of literature, poetry class, and they're analyzing. I saw a picture of, you might scroll down, it might be like some type of literature poetry class, and they're analyzing. I saw a picture of, you might scroll down, it might be in that article. I can't remember. There's, I think, one guy in there. But yeah, Swifty Professor. I would take that class.
Starting point is 01:03:36 Yeah, I would too, because I could pass it. I mean, you would just sing the songs. The class will focus mostly on songs from Swift's recent albums, but students are free to bring up older songs for discussion. The Bob Dylan of our time. Well, this is a nice little detail. With most of the lyrics posted online and the songs available on Spotify, students don't have to buy music for the class.
Starting point is 01:04:02 Oh, that's nice. You don't have to buy textbooks or anything. All the literature is out there, you know. It'll address topics such as gender, fans influence. Well, you could argue, I mean, it is equally ridiculous to focus a class around the poetry of Shakespeare as it is, you know, the poetry of Taylor Swift. I mean, who are we to say that's true? I disagree, though. Why is that? Well, I don't know. Shakespeare is older. Yeah, I mean. He stood the poetry of Taylor Swift. I mean, who are we to say that? That's true. I disagree, though. Why is that?
Starting point is 01:04:25 Well, I don't know. Shakespeare is older. Yeah, I mean. He stood the test of time. Yeah, I mean, look. Shakespeare wrote that stuff on his own. Does Taylor write? She writes her own stuff.
Starting point is 01:04:35 I mean, look, the way songwriting works now is it's very collaborative with a lot of people. I would almost say in a class, it would, yeah, I don't know if it's a study of the fascination of her like you know maybe that like it's like how she's gotten so big i'm not you know i like taylor swift i like to along says she writes her own music and lyrics and they can use similar techniques from classic poetry yeah it's emmettism that's a it's a very younger thing to do as an older as getting older and i've listened and uh you know i watch
Starting point is 01:05:12 like something led zeppelin like are the you know it's like i just start going back to those stuff and i don't know everything about that or knowing derrick trucks and seeing you know tedeschi and trucks and what they do yeah and you're like're like, it's different. It's they, they're doing something that's way. That's like, uh, art artistic is different. And I, I like those.
Starting point is 01:05:31 I know. I, I, I like, I'm not hating on Taylor Swift. Yeah. She writes her own songs. I'm a giant Taylor Swift fan.
Starting point is 01:05:37 I, uh, I can sing a lot of her songs. I like the song, shake it off. I think that one's a lot of fun. I wouldn't be against this class. I wouldn't have guessed. I wouldn't have guessed. Shake it off. I think is the's a lot of fun. I wouldn't be against this class. I wouldn't have guessed it.
Starting point is 01:05:46 Shake It Off, I think, is the only one that I really like, but I do like it. It would be, if you're studying art, it's not about celebrity or fame. It's like, I don't know. But see, that's what I mean. This class is even, this is what I'm talking, like this class is just talking about someone
Starting point is 01:06:03 that created something. And then like, instead of like. Maybe at the end you have to write your own song. Yeah, it would be like, there's no. I like that. And then you submit to Taylor Swift and if she covers it, then you pass. Yeah. Otherwise you fail.
Starting point is 01:06:21 It's like, I think it's like, what are you going to do with this? Well, I think it's about examining a creative person, examining how they do what they do, and then learning about their process. And then ideally, you apply those things to create your own stuff. What's that bottom sentence? I say her goal is, self-described Swift fan, and said her goal is to teach literary traditions through a contemporary lens. She says, I want to take what Swift fans can already do at a sophisticated level, tease it out for a bit with a different vocabulary,
Starting point is 01:06:54 and show them how, in fact, Swift draws on richer literary traditions in her songwriting, both topically but also formally, in terms of how she uses references, metaphors, and clever manipulations of words. Yeah. I think comedian would be better. A comedian? You could do this too.
Starting point is 01:07:16 Well, hey, look, they do a Nate Bargetzi class. I'll defend it. They do a Nate Bargetzi class at Vanderbilt? I mean, how awesome would that be? I'll defend it all day long. Yeah, of course. We are out of your mind. I'll flip-flop in a heartbeat. But comedians, our words are way more important.
Starting point is 01:07:31 I think the words in a song are pretty important, too. Words are all that matter. I don't even know the words of songs. I have no, like, I can sing the songs of the words, and I couldn't tell you. Now, it could be because mentally something is wildly wrong with me but I can sing all these Taylor Swift songs I don't know what they're about they don't soak in on me and I love it and that's and that's not Taylor Swift that's
Starting point is 01:07:56 Stairway to Heaven I don't know what this stuff is about I don't and I can sing parts of it November Rain I don't I just it does not I don't think of it can sing parts of it. November Rain. I don't, I just, it does not, I don't think of it like that. I'm just like enjoying the sound. But would you enjoy the song as much if instead of lyrics, it was just her going la, la, la, la, la, la in the same melody? Some songs I like just do that. They go, I don't know. There's some new songs.
Starting point is 01:08:22 You're like, they're not even saying words. Yeah, there's some Beatles songs out there that are like that, where they're like almost don not even saying word yeah there's some beatles songs out there that are like that where they're like almost don't even really say anything and it's great but if they studied the beatles people went they went trash so i i do agree with your if they if they shakespeare the beatles or i mean you know i i do understand that so i'm i'm not against it because it's like you know if i'm older than Taylor Swift, you're like, well, in 40 years of the Taylor Swift class, you might be like, well, that's smart that they do that.
Starting point is 01:08:52 So I'm not trashing the idea of the class. People coming up, that lady came up with an idea. I just think mentally a lot of people are learning stuff and being, you're learning and being trained to not it's like to talk about stuff that's already been done instead of being like how do you it's like just do something i say this a lot like when on our work like uh the stuff that we do not y'all but like with you know we're like other with the people that work with us now because, you know, my sister and I. But I'm talking about, like, just do it.
Starting point is 01:09:28 Like, there's a lot of, well, we could try that, but I don't think this is going to work and that. But you go, then just do it. If you do it and then we see it doesn't work, then we have an answer. But there's a lot of just talking. You can talk yourself out of even trying because you go, well, how's that even going to be possible if we go if we try to say we want to you know do these crazy lights on the stage i think it'd be blind people in the eyes do we know it would blind
Starting point is 01:09:55 people in the eyes are you just saying i think it like blind people in the eyes then you know these people need to suffer and i want the audience to go he's a blind and might we're not doing this with any lights at all this is just i'm trying to think of example on the fly but it's do it just do it and then that was the diet thing that i have to finally accept well if i i can talk i'll tell you a million reasons why i don't want to do it or why i don't just if you're not honest with yourself, just do it. And if you do it, there's your answer. Well, that's what's great about comedy is with comedy,
Starting point is 01:10:31 you go on stage and you know whether it's funny or not right away. You don't need to study it. You go up and you do it. If they don't laugh, then it's not funny. Yeah, it's the words. That's what's fun about it because it's like you're like now with my set because we're so close to taping it's like the set is there and i'm messing with the little words here and there and i'm learning there's one part where i
Starting point is 01:10:55 would say stranger and now i say guy and guy works better and it's crazy yeah and it's uh it's crazy. Yeah. And it's just, Guy is funnier. I say stranger one other part of my act too, but I was saying it these other two spots, and then I just changed it to Guy. And it's at the end. It's a joke that's not the closer, but it's the second to last joke. And I say Guy now, and it just gets a, you know. It is amazing.
Starting point is 01:11:23 I still got to mess with it a little bit. What a one word or a little just a flip or adding a word, taking out a word, what it can do to a joke. I mean, I've told jokes for a long time. And then just change it up one time, not even really thinking about it, but I just change it up in a weird way. And it gets a much bigger laugh. And I'm like, oh, I've been doing this joke a different way for a long time. And all it took was that little tweak. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:11:46 It's awesome. It opens everything up. It's awesome, man. Yeah. I'm saying they should study comedians. Yeah. I agree. Yeah, it is.
Starting point is 01:11:52 It's super fun. Comedians in general. The words matter so much. I think there's no, I mean, I just think there's nothing to hide behind. It's like all we have is our words. So you have to paint it and everywhere it has to perfectly be placed you can't it's beautiful even like messing up your timing in a show you can mess up one timing on a joke and then spend you know the next few minutes
Starting point is 01:12:21 like trying to get back on track from where you're like, you know, I don't know. I've gone out and stumbled on a couple of jokes in the beginning and then be like, oh man, I got to get it together. I got 59 minutes and 30 seconds to go here and I'm already messing up. Yeah. Sometimes you got to just get out of that joke and just be like, that joke's got over and started new. Here's a second joke. And then, and all that stuff's got to just get out of that joke and just be like, that joke's got over. Start anew. Here's a second joke. And all that stuff's got to be on the fly, which is fun. Many times I've gone, listen, that joke's not going anywhere. Let's just settle in here.
Starting point is 01:12:53 Forget about it. Move on. Yeah. Yeah. I've done that too, where it's very fun to go there and you – I'm trying to think. I feel like I had something this weekend. Or I'll forget if I said something to set something up properly and then i'm like i don't know if i set this up
Starting point is 01:13:11 i forgot one part that sets up the next part so it's a matter of am i going to repeat it or am i going to not repeat it and you got to decide right then and then some of you are just like let me just i'm gonna just not repeat it because maybe i said it and maybe people get it and maybe it doesn't get the laugh i know and i'm like i bet i didn't say it but then i gotta just i gotta i gotta stay in the rhythm to get into the next joke i've forgotten a joke midway through and been like we'll come back to it and then i try to remember it and then later in the set come back to it sometimes that's gold other time tell the audience that yeah yeah and other times i'll come back to it and do it and other time you tell the audience that yeah yeah and other times i'll come back to it and do it and then i go was it worth it yeah maybe that's like one of those
Starting point is 01:13:50 things yeah exactly that that stuff always work or it doesn't always work but it is it's great when you can do it but that's like uh that's another one you like people you can start to see comics they build that stuff into their act yeah and then you're like well that's not good right don't build it into your act. Yeah, don't fake it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:14:08 What are you doing there, bud? Sorry. I think I broke something. You got bored? But I didn't. It's all good. Just making loud noises. Just making loud noises attached to the mic.
Starting point is 01:14:16 I apologize. Yeah, yeah. That's all right. Went to college. Go ahead. So the big thing that happened the day this college episode came out was the tuition forgiveness that happened this past week. So I looked up.
Starting point is 01:14:29 Might credit the podcast. Maybe so. For making that change. We got the ball rolling. We got the ball rolling. Yeah. And with that Pell Grant, you get even more. So congratulations, buddy.
Starting point is 01:14:38 Maybe I can get some of that. Wait, he gets paid back from a Pell Grant? Doesn't Pell Grant do that? Do you have student loans right now? No. I was just being No. That cost me 500 bucks
Starting point is 01:14:48 20 years ago. Yeah. I don't know how you had it financed. I don't even know. How do you get a Pell Grant? You just call the Pell Grant office?
Starting point is 01:14:57 I don't remember what I did but you submitted. Pell Grant office. Hello. Hello Mr. Grant. It's Pell Grant. Mr. Pell. Hello.
Starting point is 01:15:05 Is this Pell? It's Nate Bargetzi. I'd like to go to a volunteer state, and I was told I need one of your grants. And he goes, I grant it. Thank you. No money. He just grants it. I would like your grant that I want to try college.
Starting point is 01:15:20 He goes, I grant it. I want to try college. Then you just tell the college. They go, all right, we'll take this money off. I go, I called Pell. He granted me. He said you just tell the college. They go, all right, we'll take this money off. I go, I called Pell. He granted me. He said I could do it. And they go, all right.
Starting point is 01:15:29 All right, we'll take it one more. Get in there. It's all in the honor system. It's all in the honor system. I even think tuition forgiveness, it sounds weird. It's like, we forgive you. I know. For the mistakes you made.
Starting point is 01:15:38 Yeah. We were talking about it the other night. And then it was like, what if you did uh instead of instead of uh student loan debt it was like get rid of people's medical debt much better much better right yeah and then uh it's uh like if you did that that would be that'd be much it's like i would i feel better about that because you're like a lot of people that's not it's like stuff happens to people and they don't choose it and if someone was like well i live healthy why would like, a lot of people, that's not – it's like stuff happens to people and they don't choose it. And if someone was like, well, I live healthy.
Starting point is 01:16:08 Why would I do it? I'd be like, that's my same theory with college. Like I made it without college, so why am I paying for your college? Right. It's the same kind of idea. And at least you're helping people that really – I mean, medical debt, dude. People, it's nuts. Totally.
Starting point is 01:16:23 They get just bombarded and bombarded. But you can make the same argument that these student loans are predatory in the same way. They're predatory in the same way, but the predatory, I'd imagine, in student loans attacks people that are going to make more of a living. You'd hope so. You'd hope so, but a lot of them don't. With medical. But I mean, if people are going to Stanford, if you go into all this stuff, you have these crazy loans.
Starting point is 01:16:46 Well, those people are. People are going, college is at least a positive thing. Medical stuff can be like, it's just the world was very unfair to you. And you go to that. And you got handled a bad situation. And so then you just are in debt to a hospital. Right. And you have no choice.
Starting point is 01:17:06 College is still a choice. You still get to choose. You don't get to choose if you get hit by a car. So that person should not be, like, go help those people out. And then you want to, it's like, those are the people that need the actual, like, I think people would get behind that. Yeah. To be like, if that money's going to helping these families, you know, then like, you know, that are like their kids get, you know, you have all this, these children hospitals and all this stuff. And you're like, those things do benefits and those do, you have to raise money on stuff.
Starting point is 01:17:36 You're like, why is money not going to that? Like, who doesn't want to go help these kids that are born with this stuff? Like everybody wants to go. So send the money to that. that are born with this stuff. Everybody wants to. So send the money to that. You want me to go send it to the guy that's voting,
Starting point is 01:17:50 the guy that I've got to pay his student loan debt that's in the government? Yeah. That guy, you're like, he's like, I think you should do student loan debt. You're like, that's for you and your kids? And you're like, he's like, yeah, isn't that better? And you go, but what about, that guy was hit by a bowling ball weird.
Starting point is 01:18:07 Should have been staying in there. He goes, well, why was he in a situation with a bowling ball? I go, because poor people are around bowling balls more. Poor people are in bowling alleys. They're way more around bowling balls. Yeah, for sure. Less income, the more you're around a bowling ball. Isn't it interesting?
Starting point is 01:18:22 My mom was on a bowling league. The wealthier you get, the smaller the bowling ball. That's true. Isn't it interesting? My mom was on a bowling league. The wealthier you get, the smaller the ball is. That's interesting. Golf? Yeah. Yeah, it's like golf. That's true. The ball's pretty small.
Starting point is 01:18:33 Yeah. The poor people, beach balls. Yeah. That's all they got. Beach balls, bowling balls. Jump castles. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:18:41 That feels like a ball. Yeah. It's inflatable. Yeah, you go, go the rich the wealthy lives in a castle the poor theirs is always inflatable get to go to a friend's house who has a jump castle yeah yeah yeah that's true but with doctor stuff you know you go to the doctor accidents and because you're like well you're never going to be able to afford to fly so we will give you the opportunity to visit it for a couple seconds.
Starting point is 01:19:08 Two seconds. You got to come back down. No pads in the springs. How many times over? A hundred times over. Yeah. But if you mess up, you will go to the hospital and owe money for the rest of your life to this hospital.
Starting point is 01:19:19 There you go. There you go. They give you stuff that's going to hurt you worse. Yeah. That's true. Because they know deep down. Because they know deep down you're never going to get out of that. I mean, these people have like, and I get like their diets are not good,
Starting point is 01:19:30 but then you're like, well, they don't have a fair chance. Because if you don't have money, well, you don't get to go to a nice restaurant. You have to go to these. It's called food islands. It's called food islands. What's that? When you're in an area that only has bad food and and there's nothing good around you so you have no choice no whole foods you got a dollar general
Starting point is 01:19:50 no organic food in the grocery sends them more in into the where they have to go to the doctor and hospital and stuff right you get trapped they get these medical bills you get trapped in cycles so like why would you not go help medical stuff if people are on with this, I'll tell you who actually came up with it. I didn't want to say it just in case people were like, no. You might want to wait until next week and see how they take it. No, Laura said it. But someone else might have said this. I don't know.
Starting point is 01:20:17 We were just talking about it. Laura said, what if they did that? She just said, what if? And I was like, yeah, that does make sense. Yeah, that would be nice. That would be nice. I would feel at least better knowing that. I have student loans still, and I don't expect them to get paid off, and I'm fine.
Starting point is 01:20:32 But if they are forgiven, I mean, I'll take it for sure. Yeah, you would take it. But it's like, I'd rather you not get that. Because it's like, you're going to probably be able to pay off. I don't feel like I deserve to have them paid off or anything. But if Biden wants to give me $10 i'll take i'll take it yeah i'll take it i'll take it too i mean i don't have any loans but you could throw that it's not too late take one out now yeah and then you'll get forgiven yeah is that right i don't know what about for
Starting point is 01:21:00 trade school i called do they do they trade school I learned to weld. I called one of those services just to let me figure out if I even got any. And the lady was like, we're real busy right now. And I go, can you look into my – I gave her my social security number. And she's like, I don't know, man. You want to just try back next week? She was so overwhelmed. She was like, your stuff's not coming up. It sounded like chaos over there yeah at turbo tax no
Starting point is 01:21:27 at the student aid office or whatever at notre dame no at the the federal government oh where my loans are through she was like i don't know man yeah i go yeah i'd be fun to be a president you get to say stuff that like just calls this complete case just do it just everybody and he goes like if you get to the level like i want to be president just to you know be like uh and she's like you know what i don't want no more mosquitoes goodbye and then people are just like i don't and then everybody's calling like a mosquito office side yes are y'all gonna really do that he goes I don't know. And then everybody's calling like a mosquito office. Spectracide. Yes, spectracide. Are y'all going to really do that?
Starting point is 01:22:07 He goes, I don't know. We've been trying for years to get rid of mosquitoes. It's hard. Yeah. It's hard. You know, when JFK said, we're going to go to the moon by the end of this decade, they knew like nothing about getting to the moon. There was like no evidence that they were going to get there. But he's like, we're going to do it.
Starting point is 01:22:23 Yeah. So then everybody just scrambled and figured it out. And they still haven't figured it out yet. Well, I was going to get there but he's like we're gonna do it yeah so then everyone just scramble and they still haven't figured it out well i was gonna say it worked because we're gonna do about in the decade they were like we could do it tomorrow like we can do it whenever we have the video we have a studio set up and we're ready to go i'll do it tomorrow done 10 years ago you ever seen uh some old movie i don't know but you do that you just said you tell them, figure it out. So the lights,
Starting point is 01:22:47 like, let's just try something. Figure it out. Go do something. That's, it's. Yeah, they're like,
Starting point is 01:22:52 first. You need the answer. Have the answer be known. Let the answer be known. With a camera crew. And then they'll wait for the actual landing to come. And we'll film it.
Starting point is 01:23:01 Yeah. There's a lot of talking. That's what I'm, there's, we're in a world of just, everybody talks about, well, they should do,
Starting point is 01:23:06 and then this, and you're like, well, no one's life changed. Yeah. That's, you know, it's like,
Starting point is 01:23:11 I always think that with charities sometimes, like some charities, you're just, like it's going to this, like, where's it going? And you want to have,
Starting point is 01:23:18 you know, somebody like, this goes to that person and that person, it changed. And then you're like, okay. And then if people can see that then
Starting point is 01:23:26 it's like you can give you know it's like the charity and maybe that's what some i don't know what all the charities but it's you want to directly impact some are transparent like that but some of them aren't it's like just show this this went to this person it helped them and now all right they're good they're taking right, I got you taken care of. Got your back up on your feet. Who's next? So you pay off my student loans. I'll show you exactly how that will help me.
Starting point is 01:23:53 Here we go. I pay off your student loans. How much are your student loans? I do know. Are you going to say it? I don't want to say. It's not a crazy amount, but it's not. Why do people not want to say?
Starting point is 01:24:04 Because I don't know. Well, I've got the tuition numbers here at Notre Dame. We could probably figure it out. Yeah. Anybody want to guess what this year cost at Notre Dame? Just for base tuition? You can do $70,000. $70,000?
Starting point is 01:24:19 Just to go in there and make a tongue? Base is $60,000. Okay. But with room, meals, book supplies, all that, it's $80,000. Yeah. I mean, what if you just took a loan? Could you go take a loan for $80,000 and just go, I'm going to go figure it out?
Starting point is 01:24:35 Give me $80,000 just to go. I'm going to move to. Yeah, you can. Sure. They would give a kid a loan? Depends on where you go. The terms might not be great, but you could, yeah, you could take out a loan with really bad terms and then you're just.
Starting point is 01:24:51 But the terms are better for college? Well, they're not amazing. That's what people are arguing. It's like they really, the interest is crazy. Yeah. I think it's a, yeah. I think it's a college problem. I think all this is, it's, you're looking at the wrong thing.
Starting point is 01:25:03 Yeah, you can't even get turned down for this, right? Like if you want to go get a car, they're like really looking at your credit, finding out. But if you're going to college, they're like, yeah, whatever. Yeah. Yeah, I've never heard anybody getting turned down for a student loan. I will say the tradeoff with Notre Dame, not to defend. I mean, those are outrageously high numbers.
Starting point is 01:25:20 But Notre Dame will meet 100% of your financial need. So whatever that means for you, they will 100 is that the honor system so no they calculate you i mean you give them information about you know like what your family makes and your net worth and stuff and then they calculate what your financial need is and they meet a hundred percent of it so you're talking about those spoons underneath the couch yeah well you, you don't want to let all your assets. All right. So if you're like, we could only pay 40. They're like, we will pay the other 40.
Starting point is 01:25:50 Yeah. But they calculate to determine what you can pay. Yeah. You can do better than that. Believe in yourself. Figure it out. I know a lot of people paid that full tuition. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:26:02 And a lot of people were paying basically nothing to go there. And that's the trade-off. It's like some people can, some people can't afford it. Yeah. You're just giving them something that's already set there. Like, I know you got to pay. You're like, I mean, if you're every, how many people go to Notre Dame? I mean.
Starting point is 01:26:18 It's pretty small. It's about 8,000 undergrad. What's 8,000 times 80,000? Just to, you know. That's a lot. 64 million? No, way more than that. 640 million.
Starting point is 01:26:36 No, 6 billion. Is it 6 billion? It's hard to keep track of these zeros here. I think Dusty was right. 640 million. 640 million. So roughly, that's just if everybody i think dusty was right 640 640 million so roughly that's just if everybody paid the exact amount at 640 million that's not including notre dame this merch sales the block you know yeah of ticket sales i mean there ain't there's 8 000 students
Starting point is 01:26:57 i don't know i mean like that you're you're basically even you could say worst case you're making 500 million dollars a year. Yeah. A year. Sounds like Notre Dame could pay off people's medical debt. And then you still call your graduates and they still send you money. Uh-huh. To get football tickets, actually. That's how it works. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:27:16 To get in the lottery for football tickets, you make a donation. Yeah. Yeah, that's crazy, dude. I mean, it's so crazy that you're at a place like no one's looking at these colleges and going like, hey, man, what are we doing? Yeah, it's crazy, dude. I mean, it's so crazy that you're at a place where you're like, no one's looking at these colleges and going like, hey, man, what are we doing? Yeah, it's wild. Yeah. MTSU, 18,976. Southern Union Community College this year.
Starting point is 01:27:36 In-state tuition's 4,860. All right. That's like, I don't know. It was about 1,000. I don't know. I didn't take a lot of classes. Vol State is 4,312. But isn't community college free now in Tennessee?
Starting point is 01:27:51 Isn't that how it works now? I think it is. Yeah, community college is free here. I should get money back. You should. Yeah. Call Pell. I bet my classes I had to pay remedial.
Starting point is 01:28:01 Yeah, call Mr. Gray. I bet they go, yeah, we had to fly someone in. We had to get a – Because y'all's teachers were like – They taught junior high, and then they had to pay remedial. Yeah, call Mr. Grant. I bet they go, yeah, we had to fly someone in. We had to get a – because y'all's teachers were like – they taught junior high, and then they had to come teach you. So – And pay them overtime. We paid them overtime. So the wage difference for full-time workers ages 22 to 27 who graduate college
Starting point is 01:28:20 on average make $52,000 a year, where people who did not go to college make on average $52,000 a year, where people who did not go to college make, on average, $30,000 a year, ages 22 to 27. So it does make a little bit of a difference there. But that takes a long time to pay off those student debts. Yeah. If you have motivation and a drive, I don't think you need college at all. I don't think so either.
Starting point is 01:28:47 But you, but you gotta be able to like, look, if you want, depends on what you want to do. It depends on what you want to do. I would imagine if you're like, all right, I want to,
Starting point is 01:28:55 you know, I want to have a solid job. I want to, you know, I want to make, I imagine you go to college, you're not hoping to make 50 grand a year. I would think you would want to shoot higher.
Starting point is 01:29:03 But it's like, if you're like, I want to make a hundred grand a year. But this is right out of the gate. Yeah, yeah. But college would be like, I mean, motivation drives also could be college, like if you'd be a doctor and all that, like that kind of stuff. But the general person, that's not, you know,
Starting point is 01:29:16 I would think you could, you know, I don't know. Just learn to do something. Yeah. You just learn to do something that could be monetized. Well, now they're switching to trade schools. Yeah. The last two years, they polled high school seniors, and it dropped from 71% to 51% of high school seniors
Starting point is 01:29:35 who said they're going to go to a four-year school. Yeah, that's learning to do things, trade school. Now they're going to trade schools. Trade schools are way up. Colleges are going to be in trouble, I bet. um college is gonna be in trouble i bet i think so because you look at sports the sports are you know you know especially being a vanderbilt fan but these these sports all they're all it's going to become they're just it's like the nfl like so all the fun your colleges you have all these different divisions and it's going to be like you're either
Starting point is 01:30:02 alabama or notre dame or you're just not even a sport or you're in some other weird thing and you're never going to be able to win because it's a football factory and they can't. And so your sports are going to just get to be kind of like there's no character into it. It's all just like a corporate machine. It's just like we're just boom, boom, pounding them out. People have been saying that for a while, though though but maybe you're seeing them come now yeah like so that was
Starting point is 01:30:29 before you saw oklahoma and texas are coming to the sec right and then uh isn't someone else going usc ucla big town yeah yeah i mean it's crazy yeah i mean so it's like you're going to get to like when i mean they're about to join forces And maybe it makes it like those games are crazy and it's fun and it's like it's minor league for NFL. Yeah. But, you know, if you get rid of that stuff, it's like with college. I mean, and on top of it, colleges are – people are getting, you know, 80 grand a year.
Starting point is 01:30:59 It's crazy. I mean, that's like – It's crazy. You know, you've got to make – is that times four, is that $320,000 or what is it? Yeah, $320,000. So you're down $320,000 if you just had to take the full loan. I know there's other blah, blah, blah, whatever. But even if it's $200,000, you're down $200,000 and you've got to make that and pay that back
Starting point is 01:31:20 on top of there's a great chance you're going to get hit by a bowling ball in your life. So we should forgive these loans. I know, but I'm know there's a great chance you're gonna get hit by a bowling ball in your life we should forgive these loans i know but i'm no but i'm saying it's a choice yeah you're gonna go do that it's a choice but it does in the face by bowling and then people are just buried with these for for decades and decades yeah i know people my age you still have over a hundred thousand dollars worth of debt there's no fear in having it like in a way there's no fear of having the debt in a way there's no fear of having the debt i mean i know people do i mean people do work hard and they pay it off but there's more and more people that have less fear about having the debt like it's like it's just like it's a
Starting point is 01:31:56 normal thing you're like yeah i have two hundred thousand dollars i'll just pay i pay monthly the lowest amount i'll pay it for the rest of my life, and that's it. Never think about it. And it's like not in a – and there are people that do go pay it back because they don't like that feeling, but I think there's going to be more and more. You're just going to go – if you want to go to college, I'll just pay $800 a month for the rest of my life. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:32:19 And that just automatically comes out. Right. No one questions it. No one really – Then you're trapped. Then you're trapped. Then you're trapped. Then you're trapped, yeah. College enrollment peaked in 2010.
Starting point is 01:32:29 21 million college students in 2010. It's kind of gradually gone down since then. It's dropped 6% over the last two years. So it is going down. Fewer people are doing that. Trade schools are going up. So I think last week I was about to get into this when we stopped some secret societies in college.
Starting point is 01:32:47 Got a pivoting here. The most famous one is the Skull and Bones. You guys heard of this? Yeah, I think so. This was at Yale and some famous people, George W. Bush was in it. His dad was in it. William Howard Taffner, the president, was in it. John Kerry.
Starting point is 01:33:01 Same time, George W. and John Kerry. John Kerry were both in it when they were running against each other and they would ask them both about it and neither one would say anything about it like it's a secret but they supposedly have done some crazy things uh they supposedly george w bush's grandfather stole the skull of geronimo and it's there at their at their house um i forgot what their house is called now. It's been a week ago. I forgot.
Starting point is 01:33:27 But the tomb, they call it the tomb. There's no windows there. But the descendants of Geronimo, I think, try to sue to get the skull back. And they're like, we don't have it. But supposedly, they do have it. Some people think they control the CIA. Some people think it's a branch of Illuminati.
Starting point is 01:33:45 Dusty, jump in any time here. Well, wasn't the grandfather, though, head of the CIA or something? There was a CIA. Maybe George H.W. was? Yeah, he was head of the CIA. Yeah. So, I mean, that's wild. There you go.
Starting point is 01:33:57 Yeah, and that's a powerful club you got there. The fact that you can still even get to where most people can't just even go look at the Geronimo school. Where would you even go see it? At a museum? I think he was buried in Oklahoma and the Bush grandfather was stationed there, maybe in the military or something. And he supposedly dug it up and stole it and brought it back to the tomb at Yale University. That seems kind of crazy to do. So I would maybe not believe it just on the fact. He'd just dig it up? Yeah, if he had to go dig it up, it seems weird.
Starting point is 01:34:34 Is that a picture from inside? Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I bet it'd be fun. I would join if they had to invite me. Yeah, I mean, I think if you can join there,
Starting point is 01:34:46 you're not worrying about student loans. Yeah, you're going to be fine. They're going to take care of you. They choose 15 new members every spring at a ceremony called Tap Day, where juniors are notified of their selection when they're tapped on the shoulder. Do you have to go to Yale, I guess? Yeah, you got to go to Yale.
Starting point is 01:35:05 That's a prank, huh? For the rest of the year, if you're a junior, people are just coming by and tapping you. Oh, no. You think you're in here. No, no, no.
Starting point is 01:35:11 I'll do it. Oh, hey. I'll do it. I just need you to move out of the way. Hey, Jenny. What? This is a big day today.
Starting point is 01:35:20 Don't be messing with me. Is Skull and Bones just guys? No. They tried to keep it that way for a long time, but they finally admitted women. Don't sound too excited about it, Brian. They finally said, look, these women are not going anywhere, and I think we're going to have to have them.
Starting point is 01:35:39 1992. There was a thing where one of the Bush daughters said something like, at Yale, they say it's God and country, something God, country, family. And he said at Bones, Bones would be first. It would be like Bones, God, country. Oh, really? We would say God, country, Notre Dame. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:36:01 So it would be the Bones, God, and then country. Yeah, yeah. I don't like that. Yeah. Y it would be the bones, God, and then country. Yeah, yeah. I don't like that. Yeah. Y'all going to have family in there? They're fourth. Notre Dame is the family, dude. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:36:16 So your whole family went there. No, I don't know. I don't know where a family would fit in. Yeah. God, country. You put family above country? I would think so. I think God, family, country.
Starting point is 01:36:27 I don't know. I don't know. Depends on what country you're in. Yeah, it depends on where your family's at. They're all in the country. If you're like, well, mine, some live in another country, you go. Then I'd flip-flop. Right.
Starting point is 01:36:38 That's how you decide. You go, well, some of mine are in another country. You go, well, I'd flip it. I would say God, family. Yeah. Like, you know, I mean, you love your country, but it's like your family, you know. Now, were you in a fraternity? Catholic schools don't have Greek life.
Starting point is 01:36:54 Oh. That's interesting. You just do a lot of other secretive stuff. There's a lot of secret stuff going on. Yeah. But no Greek life. Were you in a fraternity at MTSU? No, I was afraid I'd get in the wrong one.
Starting point is 01:37:06 It'd be like the Q-Dogs or something, and they're branding me. You would have gotten branded. Do you guys know the Q-Dogs? No. No. You see athletes all the time that they've got the brand. It's a black fraternity, Omega Sci-Fi, but they call themselves the Q-Dogs, and they brand themselves.
Starting point is 01:37:25 Oh, jeez. Oh, wow. Oh, okay. I've seen these. I like the camaraderie of it. Shaq was one. Michael Jordan. Michael Jordan's got a little brand right here.
Starting point is 01:37:36 Oh, really? Yeah. Wow. Yeah. A lot of NFL players have it, but they're called the Q-Dogs or the Qs. So you're worried that you might accidentally end up in the Q-Dogs. Yeah, I would just think I'm in some little white boy fraternity. You accidentally join a black fraternity and not realize it until you got branded?
Starting point is 01:37:54 Yeah. Well, I don't see color, Aaron, but I'd feel a brand. I feel like you would be, like they would have you clean the house quick like you would just be during rush yeah like during the they go not brought the next morning you'd be up first and you're like a little fun night last night my boys and then you're just putting everything away yeah i'd be a pledge that's what they do right yeah i never joined a fraternity but don't pledges don't you have to do that first before you? Oh, yeah, for like a whole semester.
Starting point is 01:38:26 Yeah, you do whatever they. I had some buddies, all my friends from high school that went to Tennessee were in fraternities. I remember when they were pledging, and like one of them, their whole job was just they always had to have cigarettes and dip on them at all times. So I was like, that'd be kind of nice to have, just somebody could have whatever you know
Starting point is 01:38:45 yeah some of these things are like mean though right or like too much so it can be mean yeah yeah i think that's kind of going away i think the bubble burst on that there's been a lot of hazing deaths yeah from i think these campuses are really cracking down on it yeah and they're kicking these fraternities off campus in a lot of colleges i just think it's going to go down yeah you gotta i mean yeah someone dies you're like that's that's too much yeah mainly like alcohol related deaths right like they make you drink they make some pledge just keep drinking and then he dies from alcohol poisoning yeah it happens like once a year somewhere some college they're like we didn't make him do that. We actually told him to slow it down. All right, well, there's a funnel here.
Starting point is 01:39:28 Multiple funnels. So that's where we're having trouble with that. You want to guess the top party schools in the country? Georgia was up there for a long time. West Virginia. Alabama, Tuscaloosa. Florida State. Florida State's number two
Starting point is 01:39:45 Oh I don't know how you would I think This changes every year It does change every year Who's number one Penn State This says Tulane
Starting point is 01:39:53 Tulane Tulane I think I would know that New Orleans God Well yeah Bert Kreischer was Florida State
Starting point is 01:39:59 Right So in 1997 Rolling Stone Did an article called Bert Kreischer The Undergraduate And it was about A six-year senior who just did crazy alcohol-driven shenanigans along with his roommate Hutch. And then five years later, a movie called National Lampoon's Van Walder portrayed a college party animal with a friend named Hutch.
Starting point is 01:40:20 And then there was a follow-up, Van Walder, but Bert Kreischer never got any of that money. Crazy. I think he might have tried to sue him, and it there was a follow-up, Van Walter, but Burt Crusher never got any of that money. Crazy. I think he might have tried to sue him, and it just wasn't, it was going against him. But that's crazy that they, you know, to do that, to take that guy's, you took his, to Burt's life story. I mean, obviously Burt has done very well for himself, and he's kind of showed them.
Starting point is 01:40:41 But it's insane. Like, you know, that's where i always think when people talk about people's comedians like people stealing material like i don't think comics steal material uh i mean comics do steal material but i just don't think if you're a comic i just won't it's it's not worth worrying about people think it happened enough people think stuff is stolen all the time people like i got jokes abouting Out, and people are always like, oh, you stole John Mulaney's joke. And I've watched every John Mulaney Blackout joke,
Starting point is 01:41:11 and I'm like, these are nothing alike. No, yeah. Comics go talk about the same kind of stuff. Yeah. But it's, you know, no one's, it's overall, you're like, no one's, there's no, you know, there's these cases where this stuff happens. But overall, no one's just on the road, just doing someone's full hour. And they're like famous.
Starting point is 01:41:35 Like, it's just not, it's just not, I don't think it's happening enough to be talked about. But the Hollywood industry, the movie stuff, I do think. But the Hollywood industry, the movie stuff, I do think. I do think people can take stuff from comics and they put jokes into movies because they can hide them. And I mean, right there, they just stole the whole, his life. So the college with the lowest acceptance rate, you want to guess? Yale, Harvard, MIT. Lowest lowest acceptance i don't think i may even understand the toughest acceptance right oh or it's the hardest to get into doesn't help when
Starting point is 01:42:13 you don't even understand i mean i was going to be i was all pretty tough for me college like i was about to say community college because i thought like that's what that question meant uh yeah lowest is that's not accurate uh oxford is that not that's a that question meant. Yeah, Lois, that's not accurate. Oxford. What? I mean, yeah, I don't even know colleges well enough. I could name some. Well, that's a trick question.
Starting point is 01:42:33 Harvard and Stanford are tied for second, 5%. But the toughest is a little school called Curtis Institute of Music. It's in Philadelphia. They have about 150 students. And each year, besides academic requirements, they have an orchestra and if they need a tuba player or something like that,
Starting point is 01:42:52 that's how you get in. You've got to be a member. You've got to be able to play an instrument that they need for their orchestra. Interesting. That's more exclusive than Juilliard. Yeah. It sounds like. 4%. 4%. Does that apply? Are people really dying to get in? I don't know. Yeah. It sounds like. 4%. 4%. That apply? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:43:05 But are people really dying to get in? I don't know. What's that going to give you, going to that school? Sounds great. I guess, yeah. Sounds good. You become a good musician, you get placed into. Yeah, I think you're signing up for a network at those places.
Starting point is 01:43:24 That's a big part of it. That's the big appeal of any of these colleges. What's a tuba player in the orchestra get paid? Is that really something to strive to? I think 50 bucks a show. I just used that as an example. Nina Simone, I think, didn't get accepted. There are some famous artists.
Starting point is 01:43:42 But I just wonder, if you're a tuba player and you're wanting to go professional, what kind of... Foghorn? Vanderbilt's 12%. Notre Dame's 19%. MTSU, 94%.
Starting point is 01:44:00 What's Southern Union? Really? Hey, if you got the money money we'll find a spot for you yeah I like that Southern Union's 100% alright there you go Paul State was 99%
Starting point is 01:44:10 I didn't get into MDSU so I'm on the 6% that they did not allow wow you applied there and they said no you're like a unicorn I don't know if I applied
Starting point is 01:44:24 maybe maybe I didn't apply there. I'd like to thank you, Dad. Yeah. Yeah, if you have that. I remember going to visit it. It'd be nice if you had the letter where they turned you down. That'd be a lot of fun.
Starting point is 01:44:34 Yeah, that would be fun. Yeah. That's probably worth money. It's like a Mickey Mantle rookie card. And the 6% that they don't allow. Yeah, the best of the best. I mean, would you have to have 18 on your ACT to get in? and the 6% that they don't allow. Yeah. The best of the best. I mean, would you have to have 18 on your ACT to get in?
Starting point is 01:44:51 They're like, the junior high is too far from here to get in. I think I had to go take remedial classes. To get that coach in. So I wasn't – I had to go to high school again, basically. You know, a lot of these schools now, they don't even – the hip ones now don't even look at the test scores. Oh, really? Yeah. What do they look at? even look at the test scores oh really yeah what do they look at they look at you as a as a whole person that's what they say that's actually gonna hurt
Starting point is 01:45:13 you're actually like will you look at my test scores i remember when i was looking at colleges i went to wake forest and they were one of the first schools to do this. They go, your test scores are optional. You don't have to tell us your test scores. If you don't want, we'll just look at your entire package, who you are as a student, because people make arguments that these tests are, you know,
Starting point is 01:45:37 disproportionately Brian's like, not affect certain people. So you're like, well, we won't even look at them now. Yeah. I bet that's going to pan out to be good. US News and World Reports
Starting point is 01:45:50 does the top universities every year. Harvard's number one, MIT two, Stanford three, Vanderbilt 73rd, Notre Dame 284. What is this? What is this list?
Starting point is 01:46:02 The top list in the world. That's all. Oh, in the world? Yeah. US News and World The top list in the world, that's all. Oh, in the world? Yeah. U.S. News and World Report. Well, I mean, these are all American universities. I don't believe this list. Did you have a Southern Union list on that list? I couldn't find it.
Starting point is 01:46:14 Okay. It stopped at 285. Yeah. I was very surprised that that had it ranked 284. The best universities in the world? Yeah. Hmm. Because, I mean, like Duke's 23rd,orgia tech's 58 vanderbilt 73rd yeah this is the wrong list all right i guess i looked at it wrong yeah yeah
Starting point is 01:46:34 yeah just a number what is it who what's the source the u.s news and world reports well that's the main one i read that every week that's how i'd get all my rankings was the U.S. News and World Report. It looks real. It looks like a good, solid website, I think. This is the go-to. Off to a great start. Yeah, well put together. This is the go-to list that everybody.
Starting point is 01:46:59 Oh, okay. It looks like a national university. Wait, who? Yeah, I would go to it, too, if Notre Dame's up there. USnews.net? Is that what that says? USnews.com. USnews.com.
Starting point is 01:47:13 What? This is the same source that Brian was just reading off. Where is Notre Dame? This has Notre Dame tied for 19 in national universities. Vanderbilt tied for 14. But worldwide, maybe there are a bunch of other. What are we? Princeton is number one.
Starting point is 01:47:33 Yeah, it's different. These changes every year. All right. But the core of it is going to be the system. How do you rank something like that? Well, that's the big argument is can you really? But at the end of the day, it's like, come on. I think that's the system.
Starting point is 01:47:48 Yeah. It's like, what's the – I think that's what – I really think that's what it is. Come on. Come on. It's not like Nick Navicki. It's Prince. It's like, yeah, we're Prince.
Starting point is 01:47:58 Yeah. So there wasn't enough people at Notre Dame doing that, going, come on. No, we're respectful about it. Yeah. Yeah. Get us in there there we'd like to be considered yeah you know come on we're not going to force the issue man we'll put you at 19 you go that's fine we know we're better than all of you yeah there was a college in uh there is a
Starting point is 01:48:16 college in pennsylvania lincoln university where students who had a body mass index of 30 or higher or a waist of 35-inch or more for women or 40 inches or more for men couldn't graduate until they took a fitness class. What was their waist size? 35 inches for women, 40 inches for men. Couldn't graduate until you took a fitness for life class. What happened at that college? Have they been shut down? Well, people protested.
Starting point is 01:48:44 They no longer do that you know there probably would be a you could uh if you had a college where your first year is we're gonna just make you get healthy and like train your brain to stay in shape and be healthy you have to take a swim test at Notre Dame well who cares about I'm saying like you're if it's like your class was where to like, we're going to change your lifestyle to be healthy. So you have to change your whole lifestyle. Yeah. I'm just talking out loud.
Starting point is 01:49:13 Yeah, your freshman year. Yeah, if I would have learned about like calories or like all this, like whatever. I think high school should do that. I mean, it'd be nice to have learned something that I could use in my life. Maybe they did talk about it, but I didn't.
Starting point is 01:49:31 I mean, I think it should be a required course and not a elective or whatever they called them. Yeah. Force it on people. Yes. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:49:38 Yeah. I mean, I could have learned that, used that more than I needed geometry. Yeah. What is geometry? I don't even know if I took geometry. I took it, but it didn't do a lot for that more than I needed geometry. Yeah, what is geometry? I don't even know if I took geometry. I took it, but it didn't do a lot for me.
Starting point is 01:49:48 You probably took geometry. I did Algebra 1 and then- I think geometry was next. Dabbled into something. Geometry is before algebra. I thought it was before algebra. Actually, it might be right after Algebra 1. After 1, before 2.
Starting point is 01:50:02 Yeah. Geometry. I think I went to Algebra 1, then I went to either Algebra 1. After 1, before 2. Yeah. Oh, I think I went to Algebra 1. Then I went to either Algebra 2. And then they were like, that's a lot. And then I went back to Algebra 1. That's what I think happened. I did 1, Geometry, and I don't know what happened.
Starting point is 01:50:17 I took a class called Math and Society. I think I did 1 and 2 in Geometry. Yeah, I did 1. There weren't even some angles they knew about back when I was taking it. We only went 80 degrees at that point. Geometry. Yeah, I did one. There weren't even some angles they knew about back when I was taking it. Yeah. We only went 80 degrees at that point. There's the word. They didn't have protractors back then.
Starting point is 01:50:34 That's funny. Yeah, I was like one, two, one. That's what I did. Wow. Back down. Do you take math in society? That was a class I took. I know. The volleyball coach was the teacher.
Starting point is 01:50:46 I took whatever. Like mine would be coach brown if you wrote a movie and put classes in i took those classes like every every class is like just economics speech like it would just be the normal like you want to name these classes something fun they're like just do what everybody biology just the generic the generic terms i i and i didn't even make it through those so i was told that they talked about all this stuff eating stuff at all like i'm like why don't they teach you how to eat good you're like yeah did you listen at school at all you're like i did not take a health class where you go say that's um they told us that math and society would be about learning how to balance your checkbook. But I don't even think we ever talked about that.
Starting point is 01:51:29 I couldn't tell you what that class was about. Yeah. I think we did a checkbook balance. I never was great at balancing my checkbook. I did it some, but it was never great. I don't think I've ever done it. Yeah, that's crazy. We did it.
Starting point is 01:51:44 All right. All right. All right. So I'll end on this is coming up week one, college football. I'm sure they won't count Vanderbilt's win because it was week zero. They'll somehow find a way. We count it. 1-0, 60-30-10. Made a statement.
Starting point is 01:51:57 Yeah. Some traditions, famous traditions. Chief Fasciola, Florida State. Kind of crazy that that's still a thing. Doesn't it seem like? League of Rides out there. It's awesome. It's one of the coolest things I've seen in person. I'm not saying that.
Starting point is 01:52:12 I know that, but I think that they use somebody who's actually from the Seminole tribe. And that's their way of getting around it. They got permission. Yeah. His name's Jerry. Army-Navy game. You guys ever been to that? No.
Starting point is 01:52:35 Marching on the field. I would love to go. Both sides. All right. And Auburn, they always roll Toomer's Corner with toilet paper after a week. Yeah. I got a pic of myself as a kid on my mom's shoulders with a little toilet paper in my hair. Oh, look at that. Look at that.
Starting point is 01:52:52 That's very fun. That's awesome. Did y'all use that? Did you say the toilet paper home? Probably. Probably. Before y'all left, y'all were like, we might as well grab some. We'll take some of this some that's why they were there
Starting point is 01:53:05 this is like three grand of free toilet paper i mean come on what are we doing here what's on my mom's hat there though i wish i had that hat that is a classic hat that's on that guy's shirt back there i think that's auburn like probably fraternity stuff okay yeah those are greek letters though it does look tough. Yeah. Iowa, they have a couple. Here's a new one. They started this in 2017. The Children's Hospital is right next door to the stadium.
Starting point is 01:53:37 So fans turn and face the hospital after the first quarter and wave at the children. That's awesome. That's cool. See, these schools have to – they need to do stuff like this. Virginia Tech, do you have that one in there? Yep. Inner Sandman? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:53:48 That's awesome. I mean, I would love to go see that. Me too. What do they do? They play Inner Sandman when they – They play Thursday nights. They're one of the few teams that play Thursday nights. And it's just crazy.
Starting point is 01:53:59 Crazy. I mean, like the band plays it and then everybody sings along? No, they play it over the stage and everyone's jumping up and down. Oh, okay. It's wild. And they walk out from like, you can watch a video on it. Okay. And then they walk out and they're just walking.
Starting point is 01:54:14 It's like starting to play and everybody's just going crazy. And it's just, I mean, it's the coolest thing I've ever seen. This started in 2000, so not that long ago. They installed a new scoreboard and they wanted to show it off with new Entry's music, so they did inner sandman and it says the tradition was born yeah it's like just they i mean i wish like that i want vandy to do you know it's like have something that's like people go to school for this dude like i mean they walk over from there together and then yeah i bet you never play this but uh it's it yeah i'll check it out yeah that's
Starting point is 01:54:47 awesome go check it out if you uh uh go to youtube full enter sandman entrance and uh it's uh it might be my number one i want to go see of like i just think that's so cool up there for me west virginia after a win they all sing take me Me Home Country Roads. Oh, that's cool. The whole stadium. I was like, I want to be there for that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wisconsin, I know this one. They do Jump Around.
Starting point is 01:55:10 Yeah. Started the second half. Oh, Iowa, also another one thing they do. In 1979, Howard Fry, their coach, painted the locker room of the visiting team pink because he was a psychology major, and they learned that that color dampens excitability and aggressive behavior. So they still keep it pink to this day.
Starting point is 01:55:29 That's cool. And before the final home game of every season, the seniors at Notre Dame sneak bags of marshmallows in the stands and throw them at each other throughout the game. Yeah. I'm more about this inner Sandman, like singing that song like a camaraderie with the fans i just put that one in for aaron because throwing a marsh you don't think throwing marshmallows oh wait that's at notre dame yeah oh y'all put that in for you people
Starting point is 01:55:53 put people put quarters into the marshmallows and then you can really hurl them oh that's why you that's why you've fallen so far on the ranking yeah yeah. It costs you $320,000 to maybe damage a poor person again as y'all throw your quarter marshmallows at the help. And then you go up with your fathers and you live in your castles and a guy's got just gashes on his eye. Meanwhile, I'm walking through there taking quarters out of all the marshmallows just to get some lunch the next day. Yeah, it must be nice.
Starting point is 01:56:28 Would you ever eat any? Of course. I mean, you sneak something in, of course you're going to eat something. Yeah, a couple. I mean, who's not going to have one, right? Yeah. You bring two bags, one for eating, one for throwing. Don't touch this one.
Starting point is 01:56:41 Yeah. This pocket's for my eating. This pocket's for my throwing uh all right all right we uh talked a little bit about college yeah somewhat talked about a lot of stuff college part three coming up we'll just keep going it's over it's it's all right we love you all uh thank you everybody uh i am going to be in Vegas. I'll be in Vegas September, you know, something,
Starting point is 01:57:10 11th, 10th, 11th, 12th, something like that. I want to say 10th. I want to say 9th, 10th, I believe I'll be in Vegas. So if you're there, come out to that. And then we got, yeah, the special taping.
Starting point is 01:57:21 My tour is starting, starting back up pretty hard. So if you want to go check all that stuff out september 15th in springfield missouri at uh billiards and september 16th 17th at helium in st louis awesome i'm doing zanies here in nashville september 11th then i'm doing off the hook in naples and then side splitters in tampa that week so i don't really know what week we're on here but uh i'm is about this week. Okay. I got a video that I put out. That's a video of me doing a five o'clock somewhere, full breakdown. Really great. It's on YouTube. You should check it out.
Starting point is 01:57:53 And also I'll be in Greensboro, North Carolina at the Comedy Zone. Yeah. So you're going the viral route. It's not, well, it'll be out when this comes out. It's not out as of when you know, when we're recording. Is it like when you shot it? Yeah, it's got, you know, it's about an eight-minute breakdown of me doing the song. It's five o'clock somewhere. It's great. It's going to help your SEO.
Starting point is 01:58:15 Yeah. Yeah, I'm looking to get the SEO bumped up a bit. Well, you have an act. Yes, I do have an act. When they watch this video, then they can go see a great show. Yeah, we're recording on Monday. So you're looking up. It's not out.
Starting point is 01:58:28 It's not out yet. But Wednesday it will be. Yeah. Lexington. Also, Lexington, Kentucky. We're shooting Greg Warren's special at Comedy Club Off-Broadway. It's September 29th, October 1st. October 1st.
Starting point is 01:58:42 October 1st is a Saturday. We're taping two shows. So come out to that. We'd love you there. I'll be there directing and producing the 800-pound gorilla. Greg is super funny.
Starting point is 01:58:54 Around the podcast, obviously, you've heard him. So come check that out. All right. We love you very much. Thank you. And talk to you next week. Nateland is produced by Nateland Productions and by me, Nate Bargetzi,
Starting point is 01:59:14 and my wife, Laura, on the All Things Comedy Network. Recording and editing for the show is done by Genovations Media. Thanks for tuning in. Be sure to catch us next week on the Nateland Podcast.

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