The Nateland Podcast - #115 Robin Hood & Prisons ft. Greg Garcia
Episode Date: September 14, 2022This week, Aaron is allegedly in jail due to a bar fight so the guys are joined by their friend Greg Garcia, creator of hit TV shows like My Name Is Earl and Raising Hope. The guys talk about Greg's l...atest show Sprung, modern day Robin Hoods, creative prison escapes, and Greg's side job during the writers' strike.   Podcast produced by Nate & Laura Bargatze Recording & Editing by Genovations Media https://www.natebargatze.com https://www.allthingscomedy.com https://www.genovationsmedia.com Email - Nateland@NateBargatze.com   Helix - HelixSleep.com/Nate  Helix is offering up to 200 dollars off all mattress orders AND two free pillows for our listeners. Go to HelixSleep.com/NATE. With Helix, better sleep starts now.  Better Help - BetterHelp.com/Nate  When you want to be a better problem solver, therapy can get you there. Visit BETTERHELP.com/NATE today to get 10% off your first month. That’s BETTERHELP.com/NATE.  Athletic Greens - AthleticGreens.com/Nate  Right now, it’s time to reclaim your health and arm your immune system with convenient, daily nutrition — especially heading into the flu and cold season! It’s just one scoop in a cup of water every day. That’s it! No need for a million different pills and supplements to look out for your health. To make it easy, Athletic Greens Is going to give you a FREE 1 year supply of immune-supporting Vitamin D AND 5 FREE travel packs with your first purchase. All you have to do is visit ATHLETICGREENS.com/NATE. Again, that is ATHLETICGREENS.com/NATE to take ownership over your health and pick up the ultimate daily nutritional insurance!  Babbel - Babbel.com/Nate  Right now, get up to 55% off your subscription when you go to BABBEL.com/NATE. That’s BABBEL.com/NATE for up to 55% off your subscription. Babbel—Language for life.  Factor - Go.Factor.75.com/Nate130  Head to GO.FACTOR.75.com/NATE130 and use code NATE130 to get $130 off across 6 boxes. That’s code NATE130 at GO.FACTOR.75.com/NATE130 for $130 off.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Hello, folks. Welcome to the Nateland podcast. We are lucky enough, I know we talked about
you a lot on this podcast, with Greg Garcia, created Sprung, gave Bates his what I would call ego.
Yeah.
Because he's kind of a diva now.
He's a lot asked for a lot.
Yeah, since that time, it has really blown up.
Yeah.
He goes, I'm an actor.
I don't have to do this stuff.
We have to type out all the stuff he says because he only reads scripts.
So everything you hear is –
Well, my attorney has to look it over.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That.
So Greg, creator of the awesome new show Sprung on Amazon Freebie.
I've watched the whole thing.
And the nicest guy in hell.
And the nicest guy in hell.
Yeah, which I've added to my bio after you gave that description of me.
You've got some people pushed back on that.
They defended you.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
Oh, I took it as a compliment.
Well, they did not.
Oh.
We have a lot of Christians, and they were worried about your soul.
Oh, okay.
They just wanted you to know that you can't earn your way to heaven,
so no matter how good or how bad you are, that's not how it works.
But at the same time, I look at it like somebody's got to keep people in line down there.
Yeah.
You know?
I mean, if not me, then who?
Maybe I can turn it around.
Yes.
There needs to be a corner that is also some nice people.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I like that.
So if you do go, find Greg.
Yeah.
That's what I was saying.
If you go.
Look him up?
Yeah.
Greg's going so if you
i'm saying if you're there you might not think you're gonna be there let's just say
hope you don't see greg yeah but if you have to then i would go hang out with greg yeah yeah look
me up look him up uh aaron weber uh I don't know for sure, was arrested last night.
Is that?
He's still very upset about the Notre Dame loss.
Yeah.
And he got out of hand and just punched a guy.
Wow.
Several is what I heard.
Yeah.
Several.
He had to be restrained.
Wow.
Yeah.
Coming from a big guy like that, that's tough.
So he's done.
Yep.
And we have Greg now.
Yeah.
I brought gifts because I was raised right.
So if you don't mind.
You were raised right.
I was raised right.
And I'm wearing my mellow yellow hat because I feel like this podcast is the mellow yellow
of podcasts in a way.
And I say that lovingly.
Yeah.
Lovingly.
Well, I'm a big Kyle Petty fan.
Okay.
He drove the mellow yellow car.
Well, that's interesting you say that because i i wanted to get some gifts for people and uh and i but i didn't
want to buy anything new so i went on ebay yeah and i looked around and so let me well let's start
let's start there with you there's a little kyle petty well amazing yeah that was not planned not
planned not planned amazing i got what if Dusty already has this, though?
He can sell it or he can trade it.
Okay.
This is going on the wall.
We got a Jeep.
I got a Charger for Aaron, but we'll give that to him.
Dang.
Nothing mellow about him.
Get him through the thing.
I have that one for you.
Ooh, the American...
Oh, this is... Oh, wow.
If you're listening at home, you're probably bored.
Kyle Petty.
We have everything. I did
have that truck as a kid. Yeah, this truck is
awesome. It doesn't get much better than this.
And then lastly, real quick, I also got some hats
there. I tried to fit personalities.
Okay, yeah. We got a mellow yellow.
A little camo mellow yellow hat. We got kind of a more of a
vintage. People say I need to wear a hat on here.
In case you want to go hunting, but also still represent NASCAR.
This one was a find.
This is a golf mellow yellow hat.
But the problem is if you put it on, a bunch of stuff falls out of it.
It's pretty old.
Yeah.
This is.
Well, now you can be Rodney Dangerfield.
This episode is going to be about lice.
Yeah. Be careful with that. Be careful. This episode is going to be about lice. Yeah.
Be careful with that.
Be careful.
That's going to put stuff on your head.
And then I just got two more things real quick.
A little Mellow Yellow.
I didn't want Laura to be left out, so I got her.
I'm with stupid.
I got her.
I'm with stupid.
Nice with a stupid shirt.
And lastly, I didn't know what Harper was into.
Yeah.
But then I thought, you travel a lot.
I used to work a lot.
You're not home as much as you'd like to be so I'm looking on eBay I'm like what can I get Harper that will
help her out around the house and so I got this for when she's in you're in town I got her a Nate
Bargetti meet and greet that she can wear around the house and then you know you give her a minute
or two yeah yeah take a selfie keep the selfie, keep the line moving. Keep the line moving. I would like her
to stand around the wall.
And that was $9.99 on eBay.
Wow, dude.
So yeah.
All right.
So anyway, that's that.
I just wanted to...
Just can't get rid of those things.
Yeah.
Put it on eBay,
it comes back to you.
This wasn't on eBay.
This was on Self Free?
I knew it was on eBay
because you guys
once talked about that
on the podcast.
Yeah, so I stumbled across it
and I thought that
that would be a great gift for her.
I think Laura listed that on eBay.
Yeah, she did.
Alright, this is great.
Well, there you go. I look forward to meeting my daughter.
I love all this stuff. Greg sent me a baby
gift, a baby burrito.
I did, yeah. I found that.
For breakfast. That probably also had dangerous stuff in it.
There's going to be so much stuff in your hair now.
I've tried to warn you.
Yeah.
Yeah, have you wrapped a baby in that?
Is that safe?
I don't know.
Okay, yeah.
I don't know where that was made either.
I don't know if it was safe.
Yeah.
This is very, very nice.
Mellow Yellow.
I'm a big Mellow Yellow fan.
I'm very excited about this car.
Yeah.
I do want to open it and drive it around,
but it's a collector's item now.
You can open it up.
I think that's fine.
I think Cal Petty almost won a race or two.
Okay.
I mean, I was a fan.
I have some school pictures in a Mellow Yellow shirt.
Oh, yeah?
Yeah.
Mellow Yellow is big where you were at.
Oh, yeah.
I used to drink it a lot
yeah was that like christmas presents y'all get like a 12 pack well i wish that's as rare as we
drank it but i mean you know when you live in a trailer you don't it's not a lot of times it's
not because you don't have money it's because you don't know how to spend it yeah you know yeah so
it's like we had some money but we were know, buying a candy bar and a Mellow
Yellow every day.
Yeah.
And then, you know, paying for cavities.
Yeah.
When I went to visit my friend that lived in a trailer park, which I loved, I loved
going over there.
It was more fun than my neighborhood.
And it'd be like at 11 o'clock on a Tuesday.
And the place was alive.
And you grew up very wealthy.
Yeah.
Very, very, very wealthy.
Yeah.
Very wealthy.
Yeah, very, very, very wealthy, yeah.
And I was always struck by like every trailer had a much nicer TV than we had.
It was like, you know, there was money there.
It was just what it was being spent on.
It is true.
They spend it in like, that's the idea where they have all these cars and all this stuff. And you think, well, why do they have it?
It's like they just, that's what they would rather have.
Yeah.
My best friend growing up had a two-story brick house.
He had about five Nintendo games.
I had about 30.
His mom drove a minivan.
My mom drove a Thunderbird.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
Just pick your poison.
Right.
Yeah.
You just didn't waste the money on a dwelling.
Who needs a good home?
Yeah.
He didn't.
You know, he didn't feel the wind as much right but it's you know there's a give and take
you know what i mean yeah like is it breezy is it chilly i i went to his house during tornadoes but
i was able to bring video games yeah all of them yes go over there we got there quick in a thunderbird
exactly you skinned your knees on uh that little of AstroTurf in front of your place,
and he had grass.
Yes.
But it's give and take.
It's give and take, yeah.
Dusty looks like every Greg Garcia character wrapped in wool.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Well, I've been inspired.
So the people that don't know, Greg Garcia, you've created a bunch of shows.
And giant My Name is Earl, Raising Hope.
You got Sprung Out Now, Guest Book, and Yes, Dear.
Yeah.
All of them.
And all awesome shows.
And I've watched all of them.
But with My Name is Earl Earl if you started it now
would you be
would be like
Dusty would he be in the show?
Oh yeah absolutely.
Yeah.
Absolutely.
This is what you would be
I can't believe we haven't worked
with each other yet
to be honest with you.
I'm pushing for a reboot.
Yeah.
I think that would be a good idea.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
No I'm all about that.
100%.
It's five o'clock somewhere.
Yeah.
Yes it is.
Yeah.
We could get that going.
Yeah, because you could see, like, with all your shows, you're like, I mean, this is your...
You've been looking for this man for a while.
Yeah, absolutely.
I feel like I finally found him.
Yeah.
We could update it, though.
We could update it, and he could be, like, transitioning.
We'll call it My Name Was Earl.
My Name Was Earl.
Yeah. Oh, yeah. Just to be was Earl. My name was Earl. Yeah.
You know,
just to be in the,
in the more modern time,
you know,
to give it a chance.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Give it a chance to get picked up.
Yeah,
exactly.
You got to do those things.
Yeah.
My name was Earl.
And Dusty can go either way.
Yeah,
that's true.
You know,
as Dusty.
You're talking about you in third person?
No, no, the name.
Oh, okay.
The name.
Oh, all right.
Just in case we use his real name.
Yeah.
Yeah, when the show's called My Name is Earl, you're like, wow, who's it about?
It's a guy named Dusty.
Yeah.
You're like, well, why would we do that?
I think your name would be Earl.
Okay, but we said was.
Yeah.
Meaning that maybe it's not Earl.
No, now it's Earlene.
Yeah.
Something like that. I think it's not now it's earlene yeah something like that i think it's
confusing yeah it definitely is i go we might have to shut this down i don't know yeah i've
never seen someone go from possibly having a show to not a show that i lose them quick yeah
it was a fun ride the idea is that i let my manager do all the talking you know what i mean
yeah i can lose them quick yeah you're you're literally sitting with a guy that can create the show.
You're already, and he's like, it's a lot.
I'll talk him out of it.
Dusty seems like a lot.
He was a little difficult.
It got difficult.
Show me the contract.
I'm like, are you sure you want to pay this much?
Come on.
Come on.
I grew up in Detroit.
I'll do it for free.
Yeah.
Just four Nintendo games.
Four Nintendo games.
And I'm on board.
And then he's on board.
So we're excited that you came down. And I'm on board. And then he's on board. So we're excited
that you came down.
Aaron is in Naples
this week.
I think,
you know,
when this comes out,
is he still there
off the hook?
I don't know if he's still there.
I think Tuesday, Wednesday.
So go see him tonight.
If you're there,
go see Aaron tonight.
He's there.
So Greg was,
and we were excited
to have Greg come down
because Greg,
you started this off
with,
you know, Sprung.
You got Aaron and Bates.
They're in it.
They came in.
They were great.
They were great.
I always planned to cast them, but I had to put them on tape just to show the Amazon people to make sure that it was all good to go.
But they did great in their auditions, and they were going to get the parts anyway.
But, yeah, and they came in, we had a good time.
That was our first couple of days of shooting when we were at the prison.
Well, Aaron had the very first scene.
Oh, that's right.
Yeah.
First scene we shot was Aaron.
Yeah.
So we got there Sunday night and Monday morning early, I hadn't even gotten up yet.
He was already done and back to the hotel.
And he said that you did the whole announcement like, hey guys, the set you know the kind of the rah rah rah that's right
let's go and he he had the very first scene it was day one of 61 days of shooting it got yeah it
was it was a long shoot but uh that was fun and then we i put uh on that first day uh on the call
sheet because you had to come in there brian had to come in there for for something the first day
i think for wardrobe or wardrobe so it just it didn't say his name it said breakfast
as the actor's name and then i even had on his trailer uh on in tape they put the person's
character name on there so i put breakfast and uh but then i took it down the next day because i was
worried that when he was in there changing people be coming in looking for a burrito so i took it down i took it down but just a lot of brian covering up hello
and he's so nice he probably goes start to get some breakfast items and why granola bars
i was so nervous on set even though i had one little line i know that sounds stupid but i was
so nervous and i get there and, and it's a lot.
It's intimidating.
And I had my own trailer, but I was sitting there, and I'm like, oh, my gosh.
And there's a knock on the door, and I'm like, come in.
Greg walks in.
I never met Greg in person.
He takes the time, introduces himself.
We talk a little bit, and it really made a world of difference
just to kind of put me at ease.
Oh, good, good.
You're the first person I met, and it was the director of the whole show. All right, good, good. You're the first person I met. It was the director of the whole show.
All right, well, yeah.
So nice.
Creator of the.
Creator, sorry.
He's already putting him down.
I'm sorry.
And you were lucky to have a part on this show, right?
No, it was fun.
And Aaron got up there right away, and he did well, you did well.
Now, by day two, I was a diva.
I was relaxed.
I was like, what's taking so long?
I'm in my trailer like, come on, guys.
And day two, we shot that scene where Aaron was just supposed to stand there with a gun.
And he couldn't stop laughing from what was going on in the scene.
So I had to keep going in there and going, come on, keep it together, man.
Keep it together.
But it was fun.
That's probably like a good sign.
Because you know it's funny.
But then it can get frustrating. Oh, it wasn't frustrating at all. It's a good sign's probably like a good sign because you know it's funny but then it can get frustrated like oh it wasn't frustrating not frustrating but it's a good sign but you could be
like is there a point where you're like all right dude we gotta if it was day 59 yeah i think maybe
but it was day two so i was still uh fresh in a good mood and yeah and plus it was fun having
those you know you guys there and everything so yeah everyone was so nice josh wolf was there
yeah josh was there because he shot a scene later but we threw him in that one scene having you guys there and everything. Yeah, everyone was so nice. Josh Wolfe was there. Yeah, Josh was there because he shot a scene later,
but we threw him in that one scene with you guys,
so he was just sitting in a chair.
Yep.
Does that happen when you're filming something like a TV show?
If people are laughing that hard or they can't,
what do you got to do?
Do you have to just like, let's go to a different scene,
or is it like you got to get it together?
No, ultimately you get it together.
I mean, there'll be stuff that actors will just start cracking up for sure.
It seems to happen more in front of an audience when you're doing four camera shows because
it's infectious and the audience is there.
And I think with single camera, it's more of an intimate experience.
So you will definitely have people laughing.
But usually what holds you up more is just somebody just has a long speech and they just
can't get through it because you have so much to shoot during the day.
It's not their fault.
It's just hard to do.
And you'll sit there and you'll be on like take 12, 13.
And then it's just like, all right, let's just take a moment.
You know, let's just, let's cut for a little bit.
Yeah.
And then you'll get there.
And I've had some instances where some guest actors like just broke down.
Like broke down and just couldn't get through it.
And then I'd really have to like stop. Like broke down like broke down and just couldn't get through it and then i'd really have to like stop like broke down laughing or crying no like not crying but just like just
got way too in their heads and just couldn't get through the scene and they just like were
flipping out like having an anxiety attack yeah and at that point then i'm just like all right
cut let's just let's take a break you know whatever and i'll just go talk to him like hey
man this is this is fine you know you're all Everything's fine. You can't have mental breaks.
I've tried that with memorizing.
If I'm trying to rehearse for The Tonight Show or something,
and I know the material, but I'm like, I want to really nail it,
so I'll do it over and over again.
You say it so much that I'm like, I don't even remember the joke now.
Yeah, or you're just reciting the words.
You're not in the moment.
Sometimes I'll say, if that's happening to somebody,
I'll just be like, look, here's what you're trying to say is this. This is what's
happening in the scene. Don't think about hitting every single word. Just get it all out. Get the
feeling out there. You know what you're trying to say to this person. So don't stumble in the
middle of it. And more often than not, even that pressure off, they'll just do it perfectly.
Or they'll mix up a couple of words and that's fine because you're like, all right, that'll work.
Yeah.
We're just trying to get.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, for me, a lot of times what I write, I am kind of the word police of like, no,
I spent a lot of time and the writer spent a lot of time putting it, I want to get it like this.
But if you're on take 15, at a certain point, you might be like, all right, that got us to where we need to go.
Let's move on.
It's just easier to go buy a parrot for the show than not.
They say something that crazy.
It was a dog you're supposed to be talking about, and they said parrot.
Just tell props to get a parrot, please.
We need a parrot tomorrow, and we need to reshoot everything we did yesterday.
But that's just what's going to happen.
That's what's going to happen. We're parrot everything we did yesterday but that's just what's gonna happen that's what's gonna happen we're a parrot people now yeah that's it yeah
i had my scene memorized and we did over and over and then you said okay now try it and say this
instead yeah and that right whoa but that's the one you end up using yeah it is one of the ones
because always what what i'll do is because because a lot of times i work with writers and
and they'll have like i'll say like oh this joke, this joke here, maybe we can beat this, you know?
And so they'll have like six or seven jokes that they'll email me and I'll be like, all
right, well, four of these are real funny, so I'll just keep them in my back pocket and
then I'll come in there and go, all right, let's try some other stuff.
We have time to do it.
And yeah, that was one of those.
And we did use one of the alternate ones, didn't we?
Yeah.
Yeah.
And sometimes those are more fresh anyway coming out of your mouth because you haven't
thought about it too much. You haven't rehearsed it in your head
a certain way and it just comes out more natural just like a joke sometimes the first time you tell
a joke is when it's the best because it's more natural yeah there like with our show the pilot
i shot greg was there greg helped us do he rewrote it uh the day he came in that's when i met greg
greg was uh i i like i mean obviously i knew he
were but i didn't like really put danielle was like uh our showrunners danielle's the best yeah
and uh she was and she's like oh my friend greg's coming so but i don't get introduced as like this
is this guy and he did this or something and then he's sitting there like this. And, you know, very like you would have no idea.
You know, you took an Uber X over to my house today.
What is the one thing that I've got to get off the top of?
You took back, didn't you take back some furniture or something one time?
Oh, it was during when we were doing your pilot.
There were some cushions I bought for some outdoor furniture.
And my wife didn't like them
when they got there and and i called to say can you um can i return these and they're like no you
can't return them and i was like man really i mean what am i gonna do and then i saw their address
was in azusa which was like an hour and a half from la and i was like what if i bring them to
you and they're like yeah you can if you want to bring them here we'll give you the money back and I was like all right so yeah I drove an hour and a half to Azusa it was like
$65 I'm into it I'm into it they were like two cushions they were like $65 now with gas it might
have been a push but I think at the time I still I still probably came like 20 bucks ahead yeah
and I had a nice drive to Azusa yeah yeah and i got to see where they make the cushions not
everybody gets to see where they make the cushions yeah so that was exciting i mean a lot of people
don't walk in those doors except you yeah and they're like let's start this is a fact we're
not like a store this is a factory you're like i'll be right over i think that came out of a
discussion you and i were having just about like maybe about like just writing and life and and how like you got to just
i mean if you start like being a success in your field and stuff it's easy to get complacent
yeah and not drive to azusa and you're gonna get the stories from driving to azusa you are i mean
i didn't really get a story that i could use other than saying it right here but still
it's being used it's being used it's being used yeah you're really looking for anything to be used anything to talk about because it not all
of it's going to be in a show or stand up or whatever but it could be in an interview and
you could be really funny in this and you could do and someone's like said that oh that was so
funny so you're like ah yeah i just had that happen that's a big part of it yeah you got to
continue to say yes to things experiences and then also get outside
your comfort zone and just do things just for the heck of it you know yeah go get yeah i mean i just
had a some luggage break the wheel broke off that i just bought so i took the wheel off and i took
it into the store and i go hey i'd just like to get a replacement for this and they're like you
got to bring the whole bag in you can't just bring the wheel i'm like well it seems like so much easier to just bring the wheel yeah and then my wife was
like probably no one's taking the wheel off the luggage yeah but that's i'm taking the cushions
back you know what i mean that's what i do and sometimes those stories don't work right
and that's you know but it doesn't you're trying yes exactly you try it experience and i you know
to be this won't be the last time i tell that story no i'll bomb that on many occasions well
you're workshopping your workshop before you know it i own the store yeah so i went back and i took
the luggage and i go sir where's the wheel and i go well why do i even need to bring the wheel
the wheel doesn't work i'll keep doing Yeah. Till there's not even a store.
It's a flea market.
You never know.
The first story you told me about Greg,
you told me about him and he came on the set
and how he punched up, made it so much better.
But you said he told a story,
a story about, I think I got this right,
about you knew some professional athlete,
you were talking about players,
and then your wife said-
Oh, that was the Mel Brooks thing. yes yeah the mel brooks thing so so uh i got invited to a mel brooks um tribute
for afi it was this big thing all these celebrities were going to get on stage and steve martin
uh and martin short and and morgan freeman and all this stuff and and i got invited to sit at
a table with the guy that ran c at the time, Les Moonves.
And I went home to my wife and I said, hey, we got to go to this thing. And she's like,
I don't want to go to that thing. And I was like, come on, we got to go. It's the boss. We got to go. And it's his wife, Julie Chin from Big Brother. And she's like, I don't know what that is. And I
said, well, it's this thing and we got to go. And she said, I don't want to go. And finally,
I convinced her to go. I said, do you even know who Mel Brooks is? And she said, no.
No, she goes, I know who Mel Brooks is.
I know who Mel Brooks is.
It's the voice of Nemo's father.
I said, no, that's Albert Brooks.
You don't know who Mel Brooks is.
And I started to kind of give her some grief.
Like, come on.
Mel Brooks is a comedy hero.
You should know who he is and everything.
And she said, oh, do you know who Pam Cuisin is?
And I said, no, I don't know who Pam Cuisin is.
She goes, you don't know who Pam Cuisin is?
I said, no. She said, that's your son's first grade teacher all right touche touche yeah all right fair enough
who's this pam i go i don't know your best friend like i think i saw her in a couple things some
celebrity chef i don't know whoever you look up to house what was your housewife i don't know. Whoever you look up to. Is she a housewife? I don't know.
You're Googling Pam Cuisine.
Yeah, nothing's coming up.
That's a great story.
But so, yeah, I love it.
And then, so anyway, yeah, and before you, like, the funny thing is, is like you say that like, oh, I came, I helped out on the pilot.
I rewrote it.
I punched it up, all this stuff.
It didn't get on.
So maybe if I never showed up, it was fine the way it was yeah i know yeah uh i tell daniel every day i text you every day and go why did you bring greg in
he ruined it i go yeah no but it was like it was fun to like see it because it was like that was
like that moment where y'all you would you're sitting that camera and as we're shooting it
then you're coming up you're like hey what have you tried this say this because it moment where y'all, you're sitting in that camera and as we're shooting it, and then you're coming up and you're like, hey, what if you try this?
Say this.
Because it was like y'all, when y'all would all say that, you're like, almost like the jokes.
It doesn't really matter about the jokes.
The jokes are going to be there.
We're going to, and then you're going to be changing them as it's happening.
You got to get the bones of the story.
Yeah.
Right.
And then also with a live audience, it's even more fun to have those alternate things
because you have to shoot the whole scene again anyway. And as long as you know you got the joke
great the first take, you don't need to do it again. Now you can throw in, pepper in some new
jokes just to keep it fresh for the audience because you want to keep them entertained.
They're going to have to sit there all night and everything and see things done over and over.
So you'll get a bonus laugh just because it's new because all of comedy is just you know unexpected right yeah so um so that's even more fun when you have an audience
to do that do you like uh multicam or single cam more single cam yeah yeah i mean i've done both
and and they both have their pros and cons but um yeah and multicam i don't i so i mean i don't know
i i wouldn't have known this but you know multicam, Multicam was, Yes Dear was Multicam, right?
Yes Dear was Multicam.
I did one called The Millers with Will Arnett.
That was the last one I did that was Multicam.
Oh, I saw that.
Yeah.
That was fun.
Yeah, that was a fun one.
It lasted a season and a half.
It kind of ran out of steam, but it was Sean Hayes and J.B. Smooth
and Margo Martindale.
It was a great cast.
It was a really good cast.
Yeah, and i started on
multicams with family matters yeah and that kind of stuff yeah multicams live audience single cams
you know the single cams the office multicams yeah multicam looks like a play that we just
shot with all four cameras at the same time and single camera looks like a movie you worked at
you what'd you do at family matters i was that was one of my first jobs. Oh, really? Yeah, I was just a baby writer, a staff writer.
Oh, wow.
Yeah, that was one of my...
I worked there for two years.
I got there towards the end when Urkel was going in transformation chambers and turning
into like...
Stefan.
Stefan or Myrtle Urkel or whatever.
And I was friends.
I'd been a PA on a show called Step by Step with Suzanne Somers and Patrick Duffy.
Oh, man.
I love that show.
Yeah. So I loved it too. And then all of a sudden I'm in LA and by Step with Suzanne Somers and Patrick Duffy. Oh, man. I love that show. Yeah.
So I loved it, too.
And then all of a sudden, I'm in LA, and I'm getting lunch for the writers and stuff.
It was crazy.
I couldn't believe it.
And I had a little cubicle, and we kind of shared offices with Family Matters.
And Jaleel White, who played Urkel, he was kind of somewhat close to my age, younger,
but at least I was like 22 or something, and he was like 17 or something.
And he started to come up and have lunch with me in my cubicle every day,
and we were just like hanging out, and I'm like, this is crazy.
I'm like eating lunch with Urkel every day.
And so then when I got a job writing on that show,
he was the first person in my new office sitting there waiting for me
to congratulate me.
It was very cool.
Oh, that's awesome.
It was very cool.
Yeah, big Family Matters fan.
Yeah.
You were the perfect age for it. Oh, yeah. TGI, yeah, he was a little bit older. It was very cool. I, yeah, big Family Matters fan. Yeah, you were the perfect age for it.
Oh, yeah.
TGIF, yeah, he was a little bit older.
I was.
And they, but it was, like, TGIF, like, that whole thing.
So, like, was TV back then, like, in Hollywood, I mean, it was just, like, that was the biggest thing in the world, right?
Yeah, and there was three networks, or then maybe Fox was just starting out and stuff, right? So people didn't have the choices they have today. So when you got a show on the air, that was huge, because there wasn't that much space either. Now, not that it's easy to get a show made, but still, there's so many places that it can be.
even on yes dear we were on between king of queens and raymond and uh we would get ratings with a repeat that would be like the biggest thing on tv now easily on network tv you know
i mean just because so many people you'd get like a repeat with like 13 14 million people watching
the show you'd get up to like 20 million. I mean,
these were like, now those numbers would be ridiculous because there just weren't as many
options. And there was no TiVo in anything. It was like, you want to watch that show,
you sat down on a Monday and you watched that whole block. It was an event. And you weren't
going to see it again unless they repeated it later. There was no other places. There know there was nothing yeah you didn't go youtube the show later there was no yeah that
was it no that was it tgif was i mean yeah yeah and tgf that was huge that was the friday night
you know mostly you know families and kids that you know you didn't have to you didn't have to
do homework because it was saturday the next day and and that was a killer block i mean and then
thursdays of course was must see tv block and um that was it all on was tgif was that just that
was abc abc yeah yeah yeah that was abc i mean that was a hot block that was full house full
house was on there yeah full house and and we all kind of worked in the same area because some of
the executive producers were the same so it was was Full House, Family Matters, Step by Step. And then there was a show, the first show
I worked on was one called On Our Own, which only lasted one season. And that was a comedian named
Ralph Harris. And he was supposedly the oldest brother of all the Smollett family, which have
ultimately been in trouble with the law that Jussie Smollett.
Oh, really?
But he was like 10 years old in this thing.
Oh, wow.
And yet, so that lasted a season.
Did you see that coming, even that young?
I saw it coming.
Yeah.
Yeah, he kept making things up, like I said.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Did you decide before or after I arrived that even though I'm an inmate, locked up in prison,
I still need a mask on my face?
No, that was before.
Because I was going to have you completely look like Hannibal Lecter.
But people have pointed out to me that even Hannibal Lecter gets to take his mask off
when he's locked up.
You have me still.
I've pitched for Brian to wear it on the podcast.
Oh, that would be good.
And it's a different looking one, too.
So I didn't go full Hannibal Lecter.
I picked out the one that was like a little different.
A little CPAP.
I think that your character was... I was right at home. I think was a spitter you know he was a spitter so he they had
to do that to him all the time that's the backstory i think that i had for him yeah yeah so it just
worked out nice well they gave me this nice wrap jacket so sprung here and a little note here
thanking me for being i kept this so i could sell it keep being on the show and being on the set, that was very nice.
I love it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
We gave that to people.
I think it was one of my kids.
I gave it to one of my kids because I got a couple extra, and he said, oh, perfect,
a raincoat without a hood.
Yeah.
For those days that you want to keep everything dry but your head.
Yeah.
That's it.
All right, thanks.
He was real appreciative, so that was nice.
That's always nice.
That's nice. i don't know i was i thought i had something but i forgot that's something that
teach think about that tgif like why don't you think they do that now like now i mean they still
have blocks of yeah but it's just it's just there's so much stuff on that i mean i know
personally i don't watch any network TV,
and I don't know why that is.
I mean, maybe just because there's so many other choices out there and stuff.
I watch Survivor and Amazing Race, but other than that, I don't seem to.
Didn't you DVR it and then fast forward?
No, I don't even have DirecTV or cable or anything.
I just watch it.
Where do we watch it?
We probably watch it on Paramount+.
Yeah, that's where we watch it.
Yeah.
Yeah, commercials are so hard for me.
It's like I watch NFL Red Zone, and then you flip to an actual game,
and you're like, oh, man, so many commercials.
Yeah, I don't think anybody expected you to ever say that.
Yeah, me either.
Red Zone?
Yeah, just you saying, I watch NFL Red Zone.
Oh, yeah.
I don't think there is. Some people just drove off the road. Yeah, they go,, I watch NFL Red Zone. Oh, yeah. I don't think there is.
Some people just drove off the road.
Yeah.
They go, wait.
What is happening?
Yeah.
So Dusty's gone and Aaron's back?
No one.
We've melded together.
Yeah.
You know.
Yeah, that came out of.
I got the MLB package.
What, Dusty?
Well, to be fair, I did just add NFL Red Zone the other day.
All right.
You're new.
I finally reached a place where the $9.95 a month is okay.
Oh, that's good.
I can do it now.
Wow.
Thanks to this podcast, I'm able to do the extra $9.95 a month.
That's why we're here.
I didn't even think you liked NFL football.
It just was so cheap, he couldn't resist it. I'll take it. Why not? Well, football's really all're here. I didn't even think you liked NFL football. It just was so cheap, he couldn't resist.
I'll take it.
Why not?
Well, football's really all I like.
Okay.
Sports-wise.
So once it's gone, I'll cancel cable altogether.
Yeah, commercials are, people have different relationships with commercials
because my kids that aren't used to watching commercials,
I find them sometimes enjoying the commercials
which is weird and then i'll see that i watch some shows like i'll watch better call saul and i want
to watch that when it's on and i have to watch commercials but it doesn't bother me too and this
new show we're doing has commercials not a lot but a couple so it's always curious to see like
who i didn't mind them or who will not yeah sprung. Well, they do a thing on that freebie where they're very conscious about doing less commercials than you normally see.
And it's funny, when we talk about network TV and streaming and everything, the new wave seems to be commercials are coming back.
Whether it's Hulu with commercials that you pay less for or Netflix is going to start doing commercials now.
Are they?
Yeah.
Netflix is going to start introducing commercials, I think probably at a lower rate.
And I did an interview for somebody and they said, hey, with freebie and all these things, with commercials, it feels like this might be the future.
And I said to the guy, I was like, this is the past.
We're just coming back to where we were before.
Except you have to pay for it.
Yeah.
past yeah like we're just coming back to where we were before yeah except you have to pay for it yeah because they're real yeah because they're realizing like everybody in theory doesn't want
commercials but you look at you like but i also can't buy 50 different things it can't sustain
itself yeah i mean when you think about it you used to have three channels they were free with
an antenna you had a phone sitting on your wall that you paid
what ten dollars a month for and everybody used that and that was it now everybody in the house
needs a phone you got to pay for wi-fi you got to pay for all these strings i don't know how people
do it and i think it's starting to break down where people are like we can't afford all this
stuff yeah it's too much it's it's yeah you got and you got a dollar 99 everything seems like you
can afford oh it sounds, it sounds cheap.
Everything sounds cheap.
Well, that's what they're saying.
People with cable bills are like, now with the streamings, it's like cut the cord.
And you're like, well, now you're spending the same amount of money.
Yeah, you're spending all the money on the internet.
You need the internet.
Dusty's got that funny joke about they're just taking all the streaming services and putting them together and calling it cable.
Yeah, that's what I said.
Eventually, all the streaming services will be sold as a package
called cable yeah we're all we're just going full circle except we're paying more than we paid for
before yeah yeah that's all that's happening that is interesting if they're going to go back to ads
like you know they're going to have to i guess they're going to have to i mean well they have
to sustain and i think they spent way too much money and that's like that that thing, I'm not just selling this freebie thing, but at least it's free.
It's ads and it's free, so it's like back to network TV.
Whereas Hulu, you're watching more ads and you pay for it.
It's like, well, let's make a decision here.
Either I'm paying for no ads or I'm not paying if I'm seeing ads.
Yeah, that's the thing, is when you pay for no ad like i have no ads on youtube and i that's been my favorite thing ever uh if you
because you just can pay for it and skip it or you can do whatever and uh but if you do uh like
the freebie like thing you're like i don't mind it like but then some of them when you're paying
for it and they still like sneak them in like that was the thing i just thought with hulu was like
i was like even if you did no ad i was like i felt like i still would see an ad uh direct tv did it
with like maybe it is the red zone or something where they're you're like well you're showing me
an ad yeah and then you because there's not a you want to to go, I don't want to see a single ad, but they have to take a break and they have to, this stuff's going to happen.
And they'll do product placement, which I don't mind product placement.
We're doing it with Mellow Yellow.
Well, yeah, exactly.
Exactly, yeah.
Well, I have a side deal.
I didn't mean to talk to you about that.
But I don't mind that because I feel like it just makes the show more real. I'd rather have them walk in with a McDonald's bag than a McDougal's bag because you had to Greek it up.
They call it Greek and whatever, make it look like a non-company.
And so on my show, we've got tons of products.
We didn't get paid for any of them.
We didn't make any deals.
But it's nice when you can do that if it's organic, and then you can have less commercials.
Yeah.
You also have great music, and that must be expensive because music is music is very expensive yeah
that's um that's uh something that uh you just kind of have to bake into this to the to the
budget there it's always been important to me music music because i feel like it really adds
a lot to the show and and sometimes i'll have a song before i even have the scene i'll just say i
know i'm going to use this song in a scene, and I'll do it that way,
and I'll actually write the scene in a way that I listen to the song as I do it, so I
know I can fit in the dialogue and whatever.
Like Jane's Addiction?
Like the Jane's Addiction thing, yeah.
And then there's one on this week's finale, there's a whole sequence of this song called
Memphis Soul Stew, and that whole thing is just dictated by the song.
But it's not cheap.
It's not cheap.
And it seems like it's good for the artists, though, because there's a lot of, with streaming
and all that stuff, they're not getting paid as much as they did, but they still get paid
very well for the songs.
We've used one of their songs in the show.
That's good.
Yeah.
You were the reason
i did uh family drew holcomb on my last special yeah and it was good and i and i've talked to you
about this new special i'm taping like because you're i don't know if i could ever go back to
the only one i didn't have was the tennessee kid was like they make a song that kind of sounds like
a i thought it was the lumineers yeah yeah yeah it's like they make you go like, oh, I came out to Lumineers
and try something like that again, and then they get someone to write it,
like kind of play a song that kind of sounds Lumineers.
Because it doesn't matter, but it is.
It's when you have a real song, it just is very different.
It really adds just legitimacy to it.
I've had scenes on like My Name is Earl where it's like once you throw in a Rolling Stones song
and it's just like, oh, this just kicked it up to a whole other level.
Yeah.
It really does.
You got to pay for it, but it works.
Yeah.
That's what I like.
Speaking of we were talking about ads, let's read some ads.
All right.
That kind of really worked out.
This is all the stuff telling you they shouldn't have ads.
I'm like, all right, here we end up.
Hot deal.
Wow.
Hot deal.
I had one read I needed to do.
Mellow yellow, we're still out here.
We're still out here.
Yeah.
Nothing mellow about it.
We're still doing it.
Nothing mellow about it.
So we kind of started off just talking about Greg,
so we're going to get to the comments a little bit later.
Yeah.
Right now.
I mean, like right now.
I made it sound like it.
They go, God, when are you going to do it?
Right this second.
So first up, Holden Afart.
I think so.
Afart.
A-P-H-A-R-T. Holden Afart. A-R-T. Yeah. Holden Affart. I think so. Affart. A-P-H-A-R-T.
Holden Affart.
Holden Affart.
I think that might be made up.
Yeah, Lee.
You got me.
That was a good one.
I was like, Holden.
Oh.
This was a fun episode.
How about the gamble that Dave Chappelle took on himself by walking away from the Chappelle
show?
I'd say that one paid off.
That one did.
It did.
I don't know how much of a gamble.
That doesn't really feel.
I don't think.
It wasn't that much of a gamble for him.
I didn't think at the time.
I mean.
It sounds like a gamble because he walked from $50 million.
Yeah.
But he was, I mean, he already was making it.
He was already Dave Chappelle.
He wasn't doing it to bet on himself later.
That wasn't his motivation.
He was huge already.
The show had made him absolutely huge.
And he knew, I'm sure he knew that no matter how much time he took off,
he was going to come back and still be huge.
Yeah, he was set.
But, I mean, I get the idea of what he said.
Still probably scary to walk away from all that money. Yes, it definitely is, he was set. But I mean, I get the idea of what he's saying. Still probably scary to walk
away from all that money. Yes,
it definitely is, I would imagine.
I would imagine. I've done it a couple times.
And...
Hmm?
I could have
$100 million.
I'm good. Bryce
Hockenberry. Is that another one?
I'm not catching that one.
No, I think that could be a real name.
After a very quick Google, I discovered Adam Sandler makes all his love interest VV to keep a continuous pattern in his attempt to create a Sandler verse.
I love that they put very in such big words as if this answers the question.
But why the double V's?
And also, it's not
all his love interest. He has
many movies where the love interest is not VV.
They're usually
the same initials, I think.
But still, I'm like,
you had several movies.
That's a lot of VV's. Vicky Valancourt,
Victoria Bennett,
Veronica Vaughn.
So I'm just wondering why.
Yeah, I'm with Dusty on this.
Okay.
Yeah.
I'd like to know why, too.
I think Bryce is dismissive, I think, in this comment a little bit.
I'm wondering if maybe Adam Sandler had a girl that he had a crush on
that was double Vs in high school, in middle school,
and it's just his shout-out. Yeah. i feel like the very really set you off on this it's the it's the
capital very i think that's a little it's aggressive yeah because everybody other than that
other than that you and bryce i think would be fine well yeah the very i didn't care for that
this is the world today right you ask a question and somebody's like oh just google it and i'm like
what you know
let's just have conversation let's enjoy the fun that enjoy the topic yeah it's you don't that's
talking about doing stuff and creating stuff like after i take this special i gotta do another hour
and you're like all right i have to go uh dude like you said go take cushions or go whatever
you're gonna go whatever you're gonna go do go do them. You take a wheel back to the luggage store.
Yeah, enjoy the conversation.
Take a wheel back to the luggage store.
In defense of Bryce, we do have a computer here that we bring on just to look stuff up.
So he's probably like.
But it's like, yeah.
But then the show just becomes, why does he do this?
It's because of this.
Next.
You know, it's like you don't want it to be that.
But I'm not against, you know, Bryce.
Bryce looked it up. I still don't think he to be that. But I'm not against Bryce. Bryce looked it up.
I still don't think he's really answered the question.
I think it was being funny.
Very quick.
Read it as funny.
All right.
That's hilarious.
I think you may be Bryce.
No, I'm not Bryce.
I have sent in comments before to this podcast under just another email address
to see if they've gotten read, And I've yet to get through.
Brian, I brought that up to him when we were shooting the sprung.
But I'm not going to reveal.
I may send some more at a certain point.
I like it.
See if we can figure it out.
We have a very tough standard here.
I was going to send one this week, and I forgot to.
I was going to say, after listening to last week's,
I was going to say that I'm last week's, I was going to say that, you know, I'm, I'm, I'm glad that the podcast has turned a corner where Nate is using his platform to ram his
opinion down America's throat about college. And then I was going to say that I thought that maybe
you were giving yourself a little bit too much credit that people were actually taking you
seriously, that you had to come on and do this apology. Like a crazy man on the corner that like
yells all the time about like, turtles are running pizza hut and do this apology. Like a crazy man on the corner that like yells all the time about like,
turtles are running Pizza Hut and getting our kids.
Like one day he would come out in the corner and go,
hey guys, I'm just saying this stuff.
I don't know.
I hear some of you are taking this seriously.
And I just, you know, live your lives.
I don't know if turtles are real.
They could be.
Yeah, more about this turtles theory.
Yeah.
It's interesting yeah
let's go down this route yeah yeah they are running pizza i mean i don't have any evidence
that they're not yeah that's true yeah they're they're good at keeping quiet yeah where are you
at on that bryce yeah quick google search on that maybe yeah yeah google that bryce would you google at, Bryce. Would you Google our turtles taking over pizza?
Jen Pavlik.
Nate has gone on many opinionated rants over the course of more than 100 episodes,
but I am not quite sure how people
can be offended by them. He almost
always ends his rant by completely changing
his mind and saying the exact opposite.
No matter what your opinion is
on a subject, you should just keep listening. Eventually, Nate will
back you up. There you go.
That's kind of similar.
Yeah, that's similar to my, yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, it wasn't.
I'm trying not to be an apology.
I just meant like, it was almost like your emotions I don't want to get.
Like if I'm like, well, college is, you know, you're like, all right, dude.
Take it.
Let's calm it down.
Just talk about pizzas.
Pizza.
Turtles getting pizzas.
Yeah.
I'd rather talk about that.
They went from ninjas to like running a place.
Yeah.
Yeah.
They hung it up.
They got old.
Yeah.
Their knees started to go.
Like, let's start a business.
Let's start a business.
Well, they got a franchise.
Yeah.
Yeah.
BJ Keith.
The fact that Nate refers to Vanderbilt football as we when he talks about them as bad enough but when he used it talking about the Nashville South Soccer's I almost said South Carolina Soccer Club after
he admitted it was his first time going a game I lost it how about we wait till you name a single
player on the team before you start talking like you're on the reserve squad wow yeah so the we
with Vanderbilt but I mean you're just like just like talking. So you're out of, you know, it's, it would be, it's like, we've just accepted that it's we, I say we in a lot of stuff. I say we,
if I go on stage, I'm like, oh yeah, we got a big tour. We got a big tour. Like I have a big tour,
but that seems weird for me to tell everybody. So I say we, I, I get the idea, but I think it's
more people like to make that joke. We, what did you do?
And you're like, I'm a fan, man.
I paid for a ticket.
I'm that money.
Go.
You're like, I yelled a lot at the game.
Yeah.
You're like, do I think I'm literally doing something?
No, it's just, it's easier than saying Vanderbilt did really good today.
And then try not to say we, you just say we, and, and you know what?
Nashville has a soccer club and it's your town. So why would you say we. You just say we. And you know what? Nashville has a soccer club, and it's your town.
So why would you say we are good?
We have a very good team this year.
It's your love of the team.
I totally agree.
I think if you live in that town, you can say we.
Yeah.
Our traffic's bad.
I think we use that in general about a lot of stuff.
You live in that city.
Yeah.
You could say that to anybody.
Our traffic's bad. Your traffic, I it's yeah a lot of people's traffic yeah and you are you
know something you're like okay well i'm just trying to not have a long conversation with you
right that's where a lot of it boils down to and hey uh walker zimmerman is a player on on the you
know the nashville soccer team oh i know that handy well those first two guys are incredible
well now you can name he
says how about we wait till you name a single player on the team before you start talking like
you're on the reserve quad well there's the whole here we go randall leal sean davis well the first
guy there's like mvp candidate yeah yeah yeah yeah first guy's uh big time dude i i'm for we
when it's your home like and i would say if someone goes, we, you're not doing anything,
you're like, well, then we should stop talking.
Because I'm just trying to, you know what I'm saying.
I'm just trying to have a conversation about the Titans or Vandy
or Nashville.
I'm not trying to get into the, that's the, you know,
like on Twitter when they correct, you know,
it's like all that kind of stuff.
I get a lot of those.
Just a very quick Google search has given me the whole squad here.
And Vandy's off to a pretty good start, right?
Well, we lost against Wake Forest, which hurt.
But yeah, the first two were two and one.
I'm excited.
I looked up the schedule because I was curious with my son.
I looked at it and I was like,
this is the most insane schedule of just up and downs of who you have to play.
Could you play Alabama and Georgia?
It's mostly just ups or downs, your perspective.
I was telling my son, I said, this is like your high school basketball team playing.
All right, you're playing Chatsworth next week.
Then you're playing in elementary school.
Then you're playing the Lakers.
Then you got two guys in wheelchairs and a donkey.
It's like all over the map of who you play.
It's a ride.
Okay.
It's a ride.
That's why I say we.
Yeah, because you're on that ride.
Because I'm on that ride.
I do give friends hard times if they support some team
on the other side of the country.
Yeah, I could see it.
When someone's like, I always got it.
I never liked that LeBron was a fan of the Cowboys and the Bulls
and the Yankees.
And you're like, all right, dude, you have no heartache.
In the 90s, he's a fan of these.
And so sometimes you're just choosing for the reason.
But it's also i'm at an
age i don't i don't care my kids are mad at me because i switched teams recently because i grew
them up i i brought them up to be washington area washington dc area fans of teams so they were fans
of now the commander is that the new name instead of uh the redskins they're saying the washington
area yeah the washington area team that plays football. Yeah, yeah. Oh, how are they doing?
And I just switched to Chargers because I've lived in L.A. longer
and I've decided that I'm switching.
And my kids are not happy with me about that.
Now, your buddy Tony Kornheiser pointed out when they became the commanders
that no team, any team that has more than two syllables,
it always gets shortened.
Yeah.
The 49ers or the Niners and Patriots, the Pats, whatever.
Here are the Predators, the Preds.
That's going to make them the commies.
Yeah, I know.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's terrible.
It's a bad name.
And I know Tony hates the name.
Yeah, we've talked about that.
It's not a good name.
I was a big fan of the Washington football team.
I like that too.
I like that.
That I could hang on to.
I was like, okay.
But then when they came in the Commanders, commanders i was like that's the emotional push away that i need
to finally break away from this team i could go chargers yeah i could see it because you're like
i can't justin herbert probably helped justin herbert because my son went to oregon so i watched
justin herbert in oregon the first time i ever watched uh college football really i didn't watch
a lot of college football so i got to watch somebody go to the pros. It all lined up to become a Chargers fan.
I get that.
Yeah, when they named you the commander,
like the Cleveland Guardians, I bet you lost people, fans,
because they're just like, I can't do this.
Yeah.
Be the Cleveland baseball.
The Washington football team is such a good name.
I had a shirt that said the football team.
I was on board.
I love it.
So great.
I was like, why?
You made, your name is was like why you made your name
was so good that you made every team look yeah we're why are we calling these teams the bears
yeah and the tie like you're like we should just be the tennessee everybody should just be like
whatever there are yeah and i was like i love i really thought let's be adults and change the
whole thing yeah and then they're like, ah, we're the commanders now.
I mean, that's essentially what soccer does.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And it feels better because then it's your town.
Yeah.
Well, they lost me, so I'm sure they're upset about that.
Yeah.
Well, they're hearing about a guy, Milly Ilhap.
Yeah.
Bonnie Paragoy.
Bastard hounds are in the top 10
stinkiest dog breeds
and I can tell you as a pet care
professional in 45 years
I would rank them number 2 after bloodhounds
adorable puppies
but that stink just doesn't wash off
I wouldn't want to be trapped in a tour bus
with one
that's good information
I don't know if basset hounds are a good choice
Jerry Reed had one in his truck for smoking the bandit With one. Okay. That's good information. Yeah, I don't know if Basset Hound's a good choice.
Jerry Reed had one in his truck for Smoking the Bandit.
Fred.
Dog's name was Fred.
And they went on long hauls together, but still, I don't know if Basset Hound's a good choice.
And Clint Eastwood had an orangutan that he would drive around in the truck with. Any which way but loose.
Clyde.
Left turn, Clyde.
Yeah.
Any which way you can.
Have you thought about an orangutan?
I mean, I haven't, and that seems great.de. Yeah. Any which way you can. Have you thought about an orangutan? I mean, I haven't, and that seems great.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, if you don't mind getting your face ripped off in the middle of the night, I think it's funny.
Did you know the Boo Weekly?
I've ever told the Boo Weekly story on this podcast?
Yeah.
Oh, I did.
Do you know that story?
I don't think I know that story.
Oh, he fought him?
Yeah, yeah.
I did hear that.
Yeah.
If somebody does, yeah.
Look up Boo Weekly and orangutan, and it's my favorite story I've ever read.
Jenny Weiss, I have an urgent question.
I need to get to Nate, and I have surgery on Friday.
I can't go under until I know.
Does he say duct tape or duct tape?
I say duct tape, like the animal.
Yeah, I think I do, too. I think I do, too. Yeah. For sure, duct tape or duct tape? I say duct tape, like the animal. Yeah, I think I do too.
I think I do too.
Yeah, for sure duct tape, yeah.
We say duct tape.
I mean, I say air ducts.
You know what I mean?
Like there's never a duct to me.
And this is stuff you talk about a lot.
Well, usually he's wrapping his ducts with duct tape.
Yeah, exactly.
Do that.
He goes out.
Y'all would have ducks as pets in trailer parks?
Yeah.
I did have a duck as a pet for about a day.
It died, but I ran it to death.
You wrapped it in tape.
You couldn't breathe.
One of my sister's boyfriends brought me a little duck,
a little baby duck, and I chased it around the trailer all day.
We had a great time.
And that was it.
And it died that night.
Of exhaustion?
I guess so.
But a lot of animals died as pets of mine in a trailer park.
Did you take it inside?
I think I was rough on them.
Yeah, they were inside.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You probably too rough with the baby duck.
Yeah.
Nothing your body said.
Yeah.
I mean, I didn't know.
There wasn't a lot of people.
What's that movie where he doesn't know that he squeezes the?
Oh, Mice and Men, right?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, nobody was like, chill out.
They were like, here, have another Mellow Yellow.
Yeah, not a lot of PETA activists in the trailer.
Yes.
Yeah, exactly.
Mm-hmm.
Being too rough with a duck and just,
they're like, well, you're too hard.
I mean, I don't even know.
Yeah.
How would you touch a duck to be,
it's not a, you know, it's like.
I think I just chased it.
Yeah.
Just ran into exhaustion.
And I thought the duck was having fun.
Yeah.
But it was just fearful of its life.
Yeah, probably so, yeah.
Just the stress of that whole day.
Some random guy has ripped it from its family
and brought it to me as a pet to try to, you know.
It might have been a suicide.
Yeah.
It's like basically like a Bourne movie.
Like your duck just was like, never, just never got a break.
He's been alive for 30 minutes and just like.
Someone's trying to kill him.
There's just a giant chasing me all day yeah and he's like i
just would rather die yeah uh krista wilson you can definitely tell nate doesn't listen to song
lyrics by his choice of cleopatra by the lumineers as his song at the beginning of his 30-minute
netflix special it's about an elderly woman elderly woman who's dying alone because she's
so overwhelmed with grief after her father died.
She refused the proposal of the man she had loved when she was younger.
Now when I listen to it, I think about Nate just bobbing his head along to this depressing song.
I had no idea.
I didn't know that either.
Now they ruined that song for me because I like that song and I would bop around to it
too.
I'll still bop around to it.
I'm confused by an elderly woman having a dad.
How old was that guy?
An elderly woman who's dying alone because she's so overwhelmed,
griefed after her father died.
That's a good point.
That is true.
Maybe the grief just lasted a long time.
She refused the proposal of the man she had loved when she was younger.
I don't know this song, so I can't.
I mean, it seems like a family.
It could be a bit of a mess.
Yeah, I think so. I mean, it seems like a family. It could be a bit of a mess. Yeah, I think so.
You know.
I think so.
Yeah, if you really break it in, the whole family are just kind of like,
what are y'all doing?
Like, she's alone because she refused a proposal.
Yeah, she's elderly, and she goes, I can't get over my father dying.
Well, he's 105.
Yeah, right.
I mean, you know, it's like none of us are gonna get over when your
father dies but it's yeah there's a when it's when they're that you're elderly yeah and then the guy
neither one of you got married you loved him when you were younger and then you said i just can't
my dad died and that guy was like i don't know what are we even doing and then he went back to his nursing
room he goes he goes what it feels like an excuse i mean the guy's like you mean the guy that was
112 years old we can't get married because of that we're 84 it's now or never like you ever
see an old person and they go yeah i gotta take got to take my mom to the store. You're like, what?
Mind blowing.
Mind blowing.
You just want to follow them for the whole day.
We graduated.
We're the class of 49.
Let's move on.
It's an old class.
I'm class of 97.
That seems old.
Andy King.
Rumor has it Hotel California is about an insane asylum.
I believe that.
Do you?
Yeah.
Check in but never leave.
Oh, that makes sense.
Yeah.
Jesse Pope.
Hotel California is a metaphor for the music industry in Los Angeles.
Okay.
All right.
Everybody has their theories.
Yeah.
Do they never say what it is?
I don't think so.
I think they, well, they've thrown out some vague kind of, not specifically.
I think they've had a few theories.
But do you think that when they write the song, they're even, it's like.
I think they purposely kept it somewhat vague for this reason
yeah i think there's a comment later that kind of but all these guys are like music superstars
that make up the eagles yeah you know so i'm like how mad are they at the la music scene yeah i mean
they're like they're crushing it well yeah that's a big, like, in Hollywood,
they're like, oh, it's a disgusting scene.
You're like, yeah, it's going pretty good for you.
You're still cashing the checks, aren't you?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I think it's funny that Alan Jackson and George Strait
had a song about murder on Music Row talking about how they're like,
Haggard and Jones wouldn't stand a chance.
And then they proceed to make music for like 30 years saying,
Haggard andones wouldn't have
a chance but we're crushing it yeah it was george jones wasn't it alan jackson and george jones
alan jackson george straight oh it was george straight yeah and why like what is what do you
mean they have a song they committed murder on music row and i think they're kind of talking
about the state of country music but that song was probably out in the early 2000s, late 90s.
Oh, like saying like, yeah, the real country guys wouldn't say a chance
because it's all watered down.
Yeah.
But this song is rising through the charts.
Right.
They're the two biggest stars in the world.
Yeah, and then they make music for another 20, 30 years.
Yeah.
Isn't that what the movie Nashville's about, which I've never seen?
Do you know?
I never seen it.
Oh, there's a movie Nashville?
Mm-hmm, like from the 70s
or something
oh
oh is it
oh no
no that's not
that one with
River Phoenix
and Anthony Clark
and that's a different one
I don't think so
I think it's an older movie
Nashville singing
okay
is there a new show
coming out too
Monarch
Monarch
Monarch yeah
yeah yeah yeah
that's a new one
Ozarks and
every show
yeah I just see the commercial
every show is just like high family yeah it's like nashville meets the thing they say nashville
meets empire sessions and empire yeah yeah that's what they're saying well trace adkins shared my
five o'clock somewhere video so i'm big supporter you like it yeah yeah big supporter yeah yeah
we're a big fan yeah trace adkins so big fan of that show i like trace atkins i do like trace atkins a lot uh i
hope he does great i can't wait to watch his show and he was almost earl and my name is earl trace
atkins no way yep he came into my office for eight hours on a saturday and we worked the scene and i
was trying to teach him how to act and everything and he was doing good and uh then it got to the point where he was going to audition for the network and he
had to sign a contract and he came over he goes Greg man this is seven years of my life I can't
just sign this thing like this I don't think I can go in there man that's a good that's such a
great trace I said all right man I said if you can't do it you can't do it but he he loved the
script and he and and and just as an excuse to do my Trace Atkins again,
because you said you liked it.
He said, this Earl guy, man, I feel him.
I feel him.
His ex-wife's trying to kill him.
My ex-wife shot me in the heart, Greg.
It's a true story.
Yeah, he told me that story.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's unbelievable.
And then he called me when he was on The Apprentice.
So you are not going to tell the story?
I don't know the story other than that she shot him in the heart.
Well, I was-
Like literally.
Yeah, literally shot him in the heart.
I was supposed to open for Trace at the Missouri State Fair, and then it was storming, so we
couldn't do the show, but we-
The story's tracking.
Go ahead.
So we sat on his tour bus for a few hours, and then he tells me that's like his second first or second wife comes at him with a
gun and he does something and she shoots him like in the side and it goes all the way through his
body like through his lungs through his heart like he almost died wow and this is you know and
then he got married like two more times after that i'm like that is gave it a go he's like i'll keep
doing it yeah you gotta get out there it's like, I'll keep doing it.
Yeah.
You got to get out there.
It's like driving to pick those cushions.
Yeah, exactly.
You got to get out there and experience life.
He's a good actor.
I saw a movie he was in, Old Henry.
He was good in that.
Oh, yeah.
And I'm sure he's good in this show.
Lincoln Lawyer, the movie.
He's a biker in there.
That's right.
Yeah, he's good in that as well.
He's been acting for a while.
Yeah.
Yeah, I told him I named my youngest son Trace,
and he was like, I don't know if I can live up to that kind of pressure, Greg.
I said, well, it was more just a joke because my last name is Garcia
and he's the third one, so it sounds like Trace Garcia in Spanish.
But we did name him Trace.
Which we do appreciate you coming on and getting a little diversity on the show.
Yeah, no problem.
De nada. De nada.
De nada.
Steven Bargetzi.
Oh, boy.
How did you guys not know
Hotel California is about doing drugs,
mainly LSD?
Maybe it's heaven or hell,
a trip.
You can check in,
but never leave.
Come on, man.
Well, the dead,
let me tell you, Al,
you didn't allow me to listen to
anything that's how i let alone take lsd yeah i mean maybe we would be a little bit more liberal
with the drug rules yeah dad maybe remember who you're writing a comment to you were in charge of
me yeah and i was never allowed to listen to the eagles it kind of feels like he had very strict rules and now
he's calling you a nerd it is it's a little aggressive like what's wrong with you nerd
you don't know anything about acid i'm sorry i did what you told me to do
my dad i mean my dad was wild and he's got an amazing story, obviously, with all that stuff.
But yeah, he says stuff, and I'm like, you weren't.
This must be reassuring for your dad, though, to write this comment, to be like, all right, he never did those things.
Yeah.
Good job.
Yeah, yeah.
This is your dad saying, good job.
It's about doing drugs.
Maybe it's heaven or hell, a trip.
You can check in, but never leave.
Come on, man.
Yeah. All right. drugs maybe it's heaven or hell a trip you can check in but never leave come on man yeah all right uh my dad just had back surgery so oh yeah yep how's he doing uh he's doing good got rid of
his back and we got to the problem he's just a lump on the floor now i go this spine is yeah
he posted a video i guess recovering he said had two surgeries one on the front lump on the floor now. I go, this spine is. Yeah. He posted a video, I guess, recovering.
He said, had two surgeries, one on the front, one on the back.
But he never says what the surgery is or anything.
So you just have to kind of guess.
Yeah.
He doesn't always explain everything.
And he does it.
And the hard part is it's on an open Facebook post.
And then he's, people are like, what?
Yeah, he had back surgery,
made a walk to the dumpster.
We were pretty excited about that.
And that's where he lives now.
And yeah, no, he's doing great.
And I'm going to have him,
he can't do anything till January.
So everybody,
I'm letting all of us,
everybody that listens to this,
my dad can't go do shows or anything until January
because he will still try.
But we are...
Don't call him.
You're asking people, don't call him.
Please don't call him.
Don't hang out by the dumpster with an offer.
Yeah.
Don't walk around with a good guy.
So don't knock on the dumpster and he's going to open the door
and then you go, you want to do like 30 minutes tonight?
Where he has to stay home.
He has to, or he can't go do shows.
And he'll start back up in January.
Wake and bake now.
The Eagle stated that Hotel California is about the materialism of California being sucked into the Hollywood musical entertainment beast system and how
the industry is basically like selling your soul for fame metaphorically and it runs people
into the ground.
You crushed that comment.
You really did.
Yeah.
Thanks.
Well, that's one I wrote.
But again, I agree with Dusty.
That's a little bite in the hand that feeds you there.
Yeah, I'm not a big fan of that either.
Like it's like there's a lot of that where I'm not a fan of telling someone don't do something and that's where that comes from
is there's a lot of that like should i get into comedy and someone's like do yourself a favor
don't get into comedy it's like i don't yet get into maybe you are the one that makes it i don't
know like it's that same kind of idea should i go go do, can I go chase my dreams like you? No. It brings your soul.
You're like, I think your own soul has got some problems if you can't.
Yeah, I had a guy that told me to turn around when I, he read my script when I was heading
out to LA.
He was a writer.
He said, turn around.
You know, you don't need to come out here.
I don't think you got it.
But in retrospect, I think people that do that, they're worried about you taking their
jobs.
They're not secure enough.
That's a giant thing.
Yeah.
And not like they're specifically looking at you going, you're going to take my job.
It's the idea that like, you know, they're trying to say it's hard.
I think that's with everything.
I think there's a lot of that in Hollywood, like where they just don't, you know, and the people that create the shows don't want their jobs taken yeah not the creator but i mean the networks and stuff so the
people that run the networks and they do this so they're making these decisions they're like well
i'll just do tom hanks again because i don't want to lose my job and so then no one's like a risk
taker and then that's where you're at you know we had risk takers back then that's how you got tgif
exactly family matters exactly transformation chambers all that stuff all that stuff uh that, you know, we had risk takers back then. That's how you got TGIF. Exactly. Family Matters. Exactly.
Transformation Chambers, all that stuff.
All that stuff.
Victor Kazushi.
If you plan to have any other guests,
would they appear with all four of you,
or would it only happen if one of you is out?
Five people talking at once just seems like a lot.
Yeah.
The hard part is Aaron is just in the other room
he keeps peeking in which is distracting come on in here it's very distracting
we made our choice uh yeah you should at least told him i was coming you know aaron yeah because
i feel bad that he's just sitting out there no he needed to see it he goes wow what's greg doing here we're having him do the security role he's standing out there with
a gun yeah oh yeah he had the same look on his face as laura when i walked into your house with
a suitcase yeah oh you're staying here i go yeah she goes oh yeah that's fine i was like no he's
i got told you know i got told you he lives here i talked to
yeah i'm going through a rough patch i go greg can you come over when you talk to you
in front of everybody i go laura he's here already he's looking at me
she's over there putting sheets on helix mattress right now yeah the hard part she's gonna have is
when i tell her i leave thursday and greg staying. Well, I'm going to stick around.
Yeah, there you go.
I saw some things around the house I feel need to be done.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You'll walk around and go, what's going on?
A couple chores.
Yeah.
A couple chores.
A couple things.
Some squeaky doors.
I brought my tools.
There you go.
Yeah.
You got to live life.
This week, I think we kind of found something fun to talk about.
Yeah.
We came up with, do you want to say the title?
You came up with this title.
I did.
Robin Hood and Prisons.
Robin Hood and Prisons.
We were talking about what we could talk about.
Everything I threw out, he's like, Greg doesn't know anything about that.
And he's, Greg doesn't know anything about that.
And we're like, all right, we just got to stick to Greg's little narrow.
That's all I know
yeah
cause show's about
guys getting out of prison
but it's about
a guy who
robs from the
bad people
and gives the good people
so Nate said
let's do Robin Hood
in prison
yeah
and I was
my name is Earl
is a little
some karma in there
some like doing good things
and yeah
so that's definitely
in my wheelhouse
I like it
all the shows all your shows are the same shows.
Exactly the same.
I just, different named characters, but everything else is the same.
People should, VV, a lot of, do you have any of that?
I don't think I have any VV kind of stuff.
I mean, I do like give nods to my past shows sometimes in the new shows.
That's how Raising Hope started, right?
Yeah, Raising Hope had a little, an ad, oh no, a news guy in the in the new shows like that's how raising hope started right yeah raising hope had a little uh an ad oh no a news guy in the background talking about earl finishing his
list and stuff like that or i'll name the same counties that they all kind of live in the same
fictitional fictitious fictitional i think i just made up a word yeah i like it's contagious being
here yeah you walk out you miss you miss your flight home. Yeah, like what? I never did stuff like this.
What's happening?
Yeah, I'll put the same cities
and stuff like that.
Little nods, yeah.
I like the idea that Jamie Presley
is the same character from Joe Dirt.
This is just her life that we don't see.
Yeah, I like that.
I can see that.
I can see that for sure.
Was Joe Dirt first?
Joe Dirt was first, yeah.
And it was not the, yeah.
I just like the idea that we
only see her a little tidbit in that movie so this is her her real life yeah this is what she
blossomed into yeah she's so funny she's hilarious she's one of those actors that came in we were
doing auditions and she came in and she said like one line and you're like well this everybody else
can go home yeah this is this is hers no question asked yeah she's a hoot yeah yeah that's awesome
so the i think we talked about this in the middle ages episode robin hood probably wasn't a real
person um but probably we don't know for sure there are some people back in the 14th 15th century
that they said kind of fit the tale but basically it's been around since then. Different variations of the story of
robbing from the rich to give to the poor.
It probably doesn't
help that he's robbing
from the rich and his name is Robin.
Yeah, it's a giveaway. Robin Hood
almost. Seems like he's taking from the poor.
Yeah. I don't think they had
the hood then.
Maybe not.
They called it that. But we don't know. The hood then. Yeah, okay. Yeah, yeah. They called it that.
Yeah.
But we don't know.
The neighborhood.
The neighborhood.
Yeah.
He's robbing the neighborhood.
Yeah.
That's true.
Wonder what his middle name is.
Cool sack.
I mean,
I've got some cases
of some modern day
robbing hoods,
but do you guys think
there's ever
a situation where
it's okay?
To rob from?
Bad people or rich people?
Yeah.
I don't have a problem with it.
Yeah.
You know, it's funny.
Watch your stuff, Nate.
Yeah.
You should never steal.
But the older you get, you're like, I don't care right now.
Obviously, I don't think you should.
No. In real life, it's probably not something to root for and see.
But when you're watching something like this, which if Robin Hood was made up,
there's just some wish fulfillment to it.
It's nice to think about and hope to see what happens.
The justice of it.
Someone did a big heist of a corporation.
They have movies like this, and you're kind of like,
yeah, I don't think anybody should be doing any of this stuff.
You don't want people to do this stuff,
but some of them you could be like, all right.
I think there's a difference, too,
in stealing from people that are doing bad things and that are rich,
so you feel like they deserve it more as opposed to just a random,
just I'm going to go take from that person because they have more right yeah because i'm not a big fan of that i used to work at office depot
and then i would they had all these packs of 12 pens and i would open them and take one
and i thought it was a real victimless crime and then my friend was like yeah somebody some kid
right now is probably getting woofed at home for losing one of those pins yeah yeah and then i thought oh man so i really felt bad about
it and i'm not i'm not for stealing that's gonna be the first episode of my name was earl i think
yeah we're gonna go back and we're gonna return those pins yeah taken uh yeah i just thought oh
there's so many in here 12 12, that no one will notice.
Was it the package torn open?
It was the box.
It was a little box.
All you had to do was open the box and pull one out of there.
But I thought, well, I'm poor, and this is a major corporation.
I only ever stole a little bit.
But now I feel bad about it.
I don't steal at all.
I can't do it.
I don't support it.
That's good, man.
Even to steal from Walmart to give to someone else. It's like, if you want to be charitable,
buy it and then give it to them. Yeah. Don't be like, oh, I'm giving you this,
but it was really no sacrifice on your end. Yeah. It's the idea, if you steal something
at Walmart, you're not really getting anything.
You're either a regular person like you is going to get in trouble or going to have to fight you or going to have to do something.
Yeah, the corporation is not.
Well, they're just going to raise the prices.
Yeah.
Right.
Because at the end of the day, they're going to make the same amount of money.
So they factor in the shoplifting.
And so if it's high, they're going to raise the prices more.
And then people are just going to pay more for the other products.
So I was saying you got to go to the top is what we're saying.
Yeah.
Am I reading everybody right?
You got to find Johnny Walmart.
Yeah.
Go to his house.
Don't waste your time at your local Walmart.
Yeah.
Put some thought into this.
Right.
And who's to say who's bad and who's not bad?
Yeah.
Yes, that's true say who's bad and who's not bad yeah yes that's true that's true i mean when you're writing a tv show it's very easy to just you know cater it to you paint somebody
in a certain light and whatever in real life you don't know what people are really doing what
appears to bad what you know how you know what other good things are they doing you just don't
know that kind of stuff that's why i know. That's why I'm not on Facebook, because I learn things about people that I didn't know
about them, and then I end up not liking them anymore.
Or people that I don't like, I see things that would make me like them, and I don't
need that either.
Yeah.
I don't need that.
I've already decided I don't like that person.
I don't need to see them volunteering on the weekend.
It confuses me.
I like where we're at right now.
I know.
I have my preconceived notions, and I'm sticking with that.
Yeah.
It is tough when that happens.
You don't like someone, and you see something, and you go, dang it.
Now I like them.
It's a good person.
Dang, don't do that.
Yeah.
Stop being a nice guy.
Yeah.
I have my mind made about you already.
That's why I just don't get on that Facebook.
Yeah, that's good.
There's people separate.
Go ahead.
There was a guy called the environmental Robin Hood
because he would just mess with companies
that were doing bad stuff to the environment.
He called himself the Fox because he saw on the Fox River
that Dial Soap Company was polluting the river.
They found dead ducks and globs.
Well, that could have been you, Dustin.
Yeah, I was just dumping them out there.
Yeah.
I mean, that's where – you, Dustin. Yeah, I was just dumping them out there. Yeah. Yeah.
I mean, that's where, would you bathe in a river?
Yeah, I mean, I've swam in the river.
Yeah.
You rub off.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
So if you need a shower, you go, I don't think so.
Yeah, I've been in the river all day.
Yeah.
He found like greasy, chemical slime in the river.
So he would go block their drain pipes and just put trash in there.
He dumped some dead skunks on their door.
He would just do all these things just to mess with them.
All these different companies that were polluting the rivers.
Did he at least like leave a note as to why they were doing,
why he was doing it?
So they could maybe have some effect or they're just like,
there's more dead skunks again.
Where's he getting these dead skunks?
It was roadkill.
He would find roadkill.
In the middle of the road.
It said he would sign things,
the fox,
and leave that at the scene.
But I don't know
if he specifically wrote out
what it was they did.
Well, then it's just confusing.
They're like,
where's this fox learning to write
is the big question.
Yeah.
Wow. I i mean he's
apparently killing skunks that adds up but he's yeah brings it to a door that adds animals tend
to do that they're like we've been polluting the lake and these foxes are getting smart yeah let's
keep doing it do they have money did they steal this pen from the office depot? How is this all
happening? They would track you down to make sure you were not supplying the fox with a pen.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It all links up.
It all, yeah. There was a pastor in LA, they called him the Black Robin Hood. He helped 18,000
inner city students go to college over 15 years oh wow he said 98 of them
got a degree but he was fibbing their financial aid for him and they're they're it's kind of like
we talked about on the college episode where people were faking he uh he was have them sever
their legal ties from their parents so it would look like they're out on their own and and he
would they get more financial aid.
Or if one of the parents made more money than the other one,
he would just say, pretend like that parent's not around.
I take exception with calling this guy the Robin Hood
because it seems to me that he's robbing from poor people
because the people that really deserve the financial aid that didn't have to lie on their forms now aren't getting the financial aid.
So I think he's a little too high and mighty to be calling himself Robin Hood in this situation.
But he's, but poor people are getting to go because he's like with the financial aid.
Yeah, but why does he have to fake?
Yeah, yeah.
With the financial aid.
Yeah, but why does he have to fake?
Yeah, yeah. If he has to fake the documents, it means that there are other people that are more in need that are not getting it because he's faked the documents.
He's robbing from the poor to give to the poor.
He's robbing from the poorer to give to the little less poor.
Yes.
It's the way I'm hearing it.
Well, he refused.
I say we get this guy.
Yeah.
Well, they got him.
Okay, good. Yeah, they got him. Okay, good.
Yeah, they got him.
He went to prison and had to give back about $750,000.
Wow.
But he would only get them to apply to prestigious colleges.
That seemed like, come on, just get in college.
Yeah, I don't know.
It just sounds like he's working the system to help out some people.
But he took no money for himself.
He did this all just to help these kids get to college.
The heart's there.
The heart's there.
He feels very much for somewhat poor people, but not actual poor people.
That's one that I feel like if you're with him and he told you this, you're like, dude, I get it.
First of all, I get it.
All right?
I get what you want.
That's how you'd have to start the conversation. He's like, I'm thinking about doing this. You're like, yeah, I know where
your heart is. I know where your heart is. I just don't think you've thought this all the way
through. It doesn't make total sense to me. Yeah. Well, you know, see, that's my situation in a
sense, right? Cause I live with my mom. My mom lived in a trailer and that was who I lived with. So I applied for this Pell Grant, and they were like, well, we need your dad's info too.
But my dad had more money, but my dad was not paying for me at all.
So I'm like, well, he's not helping.
Why are you needing his info?
And so it's like, if I could have been like, oh, he's not around, maybe I could have. I don't know. Now I'm reading this could have been like oh he's not around maybe i could have i don't know
now i'm reading this i'm like thinking he but i don't think there's anything morally wrong with
that because you know that he's not helping you the option wasn't i'm gonna get money from dad
from college or you know or this right you weren't trying to work the system so i think in that
instance i'd be like yeah just if you're raised by your mom do they make you go find you like
what if you're like i don, I don't know my dad?
Yeah.
I mean, I knew him.
Yeah.
I don't want people that know me to be like, no, I know your dad.
You were there a couple of weeks ago.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But no, I.
No, no, I'm not saying you would.
Right.
But like, why would they be like, well, we need to see your dad's thing?
Because some people could be like, I don't know what to tell you.
Yeah.
I don't know.
That's just, I remember them doing that to me and i was like and there was no
one around me going oh just do this or this i was just like okay then i think they have to be
extra careful because there's guys like this other guy working the system yeah
it's coming back on dusty yeah because they're like we know how this works we know a matter of
fact this guy affected me. Yeah. Wow.
So Dusty couldn't get to college.
He was the real victim.
He's like, wow.
Wow.
Yeah.
Or he should have got with this guy.
Yeah.
He did.
All black students, one white guy.
Yeah.
In Alabama.
In Alabama, Dusty Slay.
He was all like that guy.
Yeah.
I could have been.
I could have went to Harvard.
Yeah.
They're like, Did he graduate?
No he's the 2%
That did it
But
I liked him
But he went
It was a good three weeks for him
Yeah
He had a fun time
There was a hacker
Who would hack into companies
And steal money
And give it to the poor
Like he would steal Bitcoin
And then give it to
Some group that's fighting ISIS
And stuff like that
Or he would Hack into government that were doing what he thought was shady practices and share stuff with WikiLeaks.
I mean, some people think Julian Assange and Edward Snowden are like Robin Hood in a sense for what they're doing.
Yeah.
Exposing stuff.
But that's another example of like,
he wasn't keeping it for himself.
He was stealing stuff and helping out poor people.
He was hacking.
Yeah, it's always a little dicey though when people take it on themselves
like they're some kind of superhero
that they're going to go out and do this thing.
So yeah, it's...
Become a vigilante.
Yeah.
I mean, that's what all superheroes are essentially, right?
Yeah, I guess so. Yeah, they go out and figure it out and do it a vigilante. Yeah. I mean, that's what all superheroes are, essentially, right? Yeah, I guess so.
Yeah, they go out and figure it out and do it on their own.
It is tough, though.
It's, you know...
But, I don't know.
Some of this stuff's good.
That if they do it, I feel like it can make them change or make the company change or...
Yeah.
Shakes the system up.
I'm all for karma and justice.
I'm all for that and finding little ways to punish somebody for doing something bad if you can.
Yeah.
Especially if it's a fun kind of like prank way.
You can just satisfy your own soul.
Put a dead skunk up there.
Yeah, that's right.
Most of these guys end up getting caught and going to prison.
And then once you're in prison, there's a thing called toilet talk.
You guys heard of this?
Yeah.
I mean, it starts to show.
Yeah.
We do that in Sprung.
So do you know this, Dusty?
No.
What did you call it?
Toilet talk.
No.
It's basically where if you're on different floors of this prison, you can talk through
the pipes.
Okay, yeah.
Flush your toilet.
And people have relationships and stuff.
I think there was a documentary on Netflix called J gel birds or something like that where they do it and and
became a popular thing yeah i had seen it on a documentary called uh locked up and i'd seen i
saw people talking to the toilets and that's why i ended up using it on the show i don't really
understand how it works to get the like how do you get a toilet completely empty empty that i don't
understand because you flush it it just fills back up again that's the mechanics of it that
i don't really understand but they do it they scoop it back out maybe they had to scoop the
water out well that's how we did it yeah we had them scooping it out but then you would still
think that most of the pipes would be filled with water yeah so i don't i don't know they
have the knob at the bottom like in your your home, where you can turn the water
off?
I guess, but I'd still think the pipes at the bottom.
I can't see them giving them that kind of control.
But it definitely works.
I mean, this was a documentary.
They're talking to each other.
They're listening.
But then they also flush notes through, and then the notes will come up in the other person's
toilet and everything like that.
They have all these ways to communicate.
It's very interesting.
Yeah.
I saw in that documentary, they take a clothesline or something and like send stuff
down and somehow they could pass stuff back and forth yeah they'll grab it and yeah did uh
is it that this one is a female is there prisons male and female um yeah there was on this show
there was definitely uh prisons on different floors, different sexes.
Yeah, yeah.
And that's why they were having relationships.
These people were having relationships with each other.
They had never seen each other, but they send pictures through the toilet system and stuff.
And really, that's how they...
There's prisons that...
I didn't know prisons like co-ed.
Yeah, absolutely.
Absolutely.
Just different floors.
And they don't ever let them even near each other.
No.
I think in the one I was watching, there's sometimes like if you have a work detail,
you may like work among the other people, the inmates once in a while, but I'm sure
they keep a pretty good eye on it.
But yeah, but they're in there together.
Wow.
Wow.
Being in a prison, we've done prison shows and then shooting it.
It's pretty intimidating just being in there. Yeah. The prison we used was just a closed down prison. It had been closed
down for a long time, but it is spooky in there. Prison terrifies me. Yeah. It's spooky. And the
interesting thing is the guy that was our location guy that was taking us around to all the different
ones. And we looked at a couple of prisons and we picked that one. He walked in there and told me
that he used to visit his father in that prison when it was still an active prison.
So I just kind of watched him just kind of soaking it all in.
That was wild.
That was wild.
But it is spooky.
Yeah, it terrifies me.
I don't want any part of it.
Yeah.
Yeah, just being locked up.
I mean, it's, yeah.
I think of the claustrophobia, you're like, how do you not, you have no control.
It's weird.
You sit in there and you just start picturing like, what if this was my every day yeah i'm just sitting in here and just all the common areas and you're
just like man what happened in here you know uh yeah it's spooky well when i walked in the very
first scene was a fight scene so you just i just see two guys just yelling and going at each other
it's pretty scary yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah that was fun we shot that um bunch of stuntmen and and at
first the guy comes to me the stuntman and he's like yeah the fight scene it's uh budgeted out
it's gonna be about 250 000 i was like what he's like yeah i got about 50 guys planning on coming
in from la and i'm like no no no i say we gotta figure it out we're gonna have six people fighting
it's gonna be the same six people with a bunch of different fights. And it worked out with editing.
And I wanted to cost 400 bucks.
Yeah, exactly.
Yeah, yeah.
I got 400 bucks.
50 bucks each.
That's it.
And two cushions.
And two cushions.
That's what I have.
And that's it.
Now, we talked on here a couple weeks ago about the Supermax prison
where 23 hours of solitary confinement.
Would you choose a roommate or not if you had the option?
That's a tough call, right? Because you don't get to pre-screen your roommate. I think I would
choose a roommate. I just would roll the dice. I mean, if you're going to be in a room for 23 hours
a day, that's a lot to be alone. And I mean, even if they're crazy, there's some entertainment value
there, I would think. I mean, but yeah, it's a roll of the dice, right?
It is.
They'll get on your nerves quick.
Yeah, absolutely.
I feel like you can just talk to the person next to you.
Or down the toilet.
Or down the toilet.
Yeah, I guess so.
You could yell over to the person next to you.
Yeah.
You could do that.
Yeah.
All right.
I'm going to think about it more.
I'll get back to you.
Yeah, get back to us on that.
Yeah, because if you got somebody that you just couldn't handle i mean it would drive you uh it's like
yeah obviously being alone is bad and if you could get someone that you really like great
it's a win but if you got somebody you hate it's such a gamble yeah yeah it's been and you're in
the gamble is everybody in there is bad right yeah there's
not a lot of good choices like where are you picking you're not picking people out from bed
bath and beyond right your your options are the prison you know now that you've pointed that out
i'm gonna go solo yeah yeah it could be a nice guy but also a psychopath right right you wanted
would you just say what what did they say?
We'll tell you the crime.
Yeah.
And then you could go, okay.
I could narrow it down, yeah.
But it's like, I helped people get into college when they really shouldn't have.
Like, all right, I think I can be.
I don't know if we'd be friends on the outside, but I'll maybe take you as.
That guy could be the most annoying.
Like, if it was one of these Robin Hood guys where you're kind of like,
you would just, someone that's, you're like, I don't know.
Yeah, he keeps trying to get you to sign up for things.
You're like, no, no.
He's like, no, I know a way to.
Or like Charles Manson.
He seems like a fun guy.
You know what I mean?
But he also convinced people to kill people.
So you're like, I don't necessarily want to be friends with this guy
because he may get in my head.
That was Dusty Slay said that.
But you listen to him.
He seems, I mean like.
He's musical.
He sings.
He was a songwriter.
Yeah, he hung out with the Beach Boys a bit.
You could talk a little bit. It'd be a conversation. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, he'd keep things lively. Yeah. He sings. He can be entertained. He was a songwriter. Yeah, he hung out with the Beach Boys a bit. You could talk a little bit.
It'd be a conversation.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, he'd keep things lively.
Yeah.
He'd keep things lively.
He'd done a lot of drugs.
The question would be, does he snore?
Yeah.
I'd want to know that.
Does he snore?
That's almost as important as the crime.
I think you'd have to accept that you're going to be in his cult, too.
Right.
Because a guy like that, those guys are so charming that they can make someone do that.
Once he walks in, you're like, I'm joining his thing.
I think just it will make life easier if it's just the two of you for 23 hours that you
just tell him you bought into all of his stuff.
Yeah.
You just hang on to his every word.
I'm fine with it.
Yeah.
I would go with whoever.
That's what I do with Dusty.
And then he's like, I'm going to need you to carve an X on your forehead.
And you're like, well, I'm here for a while.
I guess I'll do it.
There's time to heal, right?
Yeah.
Are you going to do it?
I was asking that.
Yeah.
Can I see you do it first, Charles?
Yeah.
You're like, Chuck, come on, Chuck.
I'd be like, dude, I'm in the Q-Dogs, not just the A-line.
Yeah, yeah.
Well, they said that Al Capone was obviously a big trouble in any prison.
Then they sent Alcatraz and it broke him.
And he ended up joining the Alcatraz band, played banjo, just to kind of fill in.
Yeah.
Yeah, he said something like, you know, this place.
He knew he was done for there.
Yeah.
Because it was just so...
I think it's just...
I think they sent people there who were trouble at other places
just to kind of rehabilitate them, like, just to behave.
It wasn't necessarily the worst criminals,
but it was the most troublemakers.
The craziest.
Yeah.
And they had a band, though.
Apparently.
Yeah.
All right.
There's a bunch of people try to escape alcatraz
there's only one time where they haven't found the bodies and they think they just drowned but
they never found the bodies excuse me so there's uh there's some guys who claim that they successfully escaped and they found a fingerprint and DNA evidence
in 2016 of a guy who then would have been 83 years old
that they can't swear that it's him,
but they think they may have made it.
The movie Escape from Alcatraz starring Clint Eastwood
is based on these guys.
So they took some human hair
from wherever
the barbershop is
and put it in the bed
and pulled it up
and made it look like
they were
bodies asleep.
And then they took
a bunch of raincoats,
I guess,
I don't know where
they got all these raincoats,
made a raft with it
and then they
think they made it
maybe to the mainland.
And would they dig
out of their cells?
Yeah, they had like
a spoon or something
and they sharpened it.
Like Shawshank too, huh?
And Doug...
He got that in like
through the...
I was trying not to say that.
Yeah, I haven't seen
Shawshank.
Oh.
Yeah.
Sorry.
Yeah.
I know it just came out
and everything.
I apologize.
30 years ago.
Yeah, I just remember
a scene from that
where they like
got things in
through the boot hill in Escape from Alcatraz.
I remember seeing the movie.
Oh, yeah.
It was good.
It seems like the latest way to break out of prison is just romance, that they find a female guard that they romance.
That just happened.
Just happened.
Yeah, just happened, and then they did that.
It happened another time, and they did that show on Showtime about it.
It seems like that's the, people are like, I'm done digging.
That's the route I would take.
Yeah.
Let's just see if I can.
Yeah, just really give it a go.
Just right away.
You could – I think you could befriend someone, you know, and then just –
like, I mean, yeah, that guy with that girl, I mean.
Yeah, you got to – I think that's a long game, though, right?
You can't, like, flirt a little bit and then, like, day two be like,
hey, what do you say we get out of here?
Maybe you got to really got to.
I'd get friend zoned.
Yeah.
It wouldn't work.
Yeah.
We'd just become pals.
She's like, listen, you're nice and all,
but I'm not going to break you out of here.
Your roommate gets out.
He steals my girl.
Yeah.
And you're like, why don't I get get but i can't come with y'all and they go
it's just someone's got to stay back and it feels like a third wheel yeah he goes i don't know if
you're gonna make it there's a nice guy yeah he goes there's a lot of high grass out there
there's not even like alcatraz he goes there's high grass uh highway there's an. There's a highway. There's an interstate.
It's five lanes.
I go, what?
You think you can cross that?
We don't know when we're going to be able to stop to eat.
Because I watch it on an escalator, and I'm like, what are you?
I go, this guy can't.
Look at him.
He can't.
He can't head on the outside.
He can't handle the outside.
He's better off.
You're better off here.
Yeah.
I would definitely be Brooks from Shawshank.
Yeah.
Yeah.
All right, don't say anything. I don't want to ruin anything. Now that I know there's a Brooks. Yeah. I would definitely be Brooks from Shawshank. Yeah. Yeah. All right, don't say anything.
I didn't ruin anything.
Now that I know there's a Brooks.
Yeah.
No use in watching.
Well, there was a guy in Brazilian prison whose wife would come to visit him,
and he had, I guess they had some alone time or something.
She brought him the clothes that she was wearing,
and then she changed into some other clothes that was in her purse.
And then he put on her dress, shaved his arms and legs, put on fake nails, put on a wig, lipstick, heels, and walked right out of the prison.
But then a police officer noticed someone outside really struggling walking in the heels.
And that's why he gave them away.
Oh, she just should have brought flats.
Yeah.
A free man. Yeah, why would you bring heels? Yeah, bring. Yeah, that's why it gave them away. She just should have brought flats. Yeah. A free man.
Why would you bring hills?
Yeah.
I guess to really sell it.
Really to sell it.
But it's like, yeah, just be like, give me some flats.
Yeah.
I guess.
Dusty, look up Ronald Silva.
There's a photo of him in this getup.
And does that girl go to prison i don't know
if she went to prison i think she did get in trouble she claimed she didn't know what he was
up to yeah but it's hard not to there he is right there so hot
yeah yeah look at ronald yeah i mean do people make it out like if you escape are they ever it seems like no one
ever successfully escapes you know what song i do know uh what's that blue tick hound country song
oh yeah uh old red old red i do know that story what's that that's the only song i know about
blake ship all red it's somebody, why don't you run?
Old Red.
Yeah, it was a prison that it's the only song I know about lyrics.
And it was a prison, and they had, I don't think they had fences.
And it's like they would be, the guards would be like, yeah, go ahead and run.
Because they had dogs that would be able to track you.
You're in the middle of nowhere.
You never make it.
And so Blake Shelton, our singer, he would walk one of the dogs. It was a blue tick hound or something.
And he walks the dog.
And what he does is he'd take him on this big walk in the woods.
Had a nose that could smell a two-day trail.
Had a nose, yeah.
Four-legged tracking machine.
Yeah.
And then he gets his buddy to bring another dog and so when the those dog would meet and like you know like
they those dogs loved each other so one day he runs and then they send old red to go get him
and when he's running this way he knows old red is running to the other dog and then he's
and then he's...
And then he got out and he was able to write this song.
He says, love got me in here
and love got me out.
All that's in a song.
I'm surprised you don't know that song.
I don't know a lot of modern country.
That's Blake Shelton's like...
I don't think it's super modern.
Yeah, I mean, it's...
I know old country, but I don't know...
2001. Well, it's not modern, but it's modern by my standard. Yeah I mean I know old country But I don't know Night Oh 2001
Yeah
Well it's not modern
But it's modern by my standard
I know the 80s and 90s country
But I kind of stopped
Didn't you kind of
9-11
You kind of shut it down
Yeah
Your father
Your father just texted me
That said that
That song's actually
About an LSD trip
He's like
Come on man
Yeah he goes
Come
I'm like dude
Dad
It's got nothing to do with prison yeah
he goes dude's flipping out at woodstock that's all he's on the ground there is no dog it's
hallucinating there's no dogs i but like these guys i mean if you i don't know if you're about
are you going to read a successful one or no i don't think i think they always eventually get
caught i think that they keep it quiet yeah they would suppress the successful ones well we talked about the
i'm drawing a blank on his name the guy who jumped out of the airplane db cooper db cooper yeah yeah
there's the documentary on that yep it's yeah it you don't hear about him getting i mean i just
it's like how do you get out?
And then where do you go?
I think these guys, I think you could get out,
but it's like you have to have a major plan when you get out.
You've got to have a lot of resources.
You've got a lot of people that are going to help you through this because there's just too much against you.
Yes.
You just have to go live in a small town. You'd have to walk and just be...
You got to shack up with somebody. You got to get somebody that will support you,
and you'll be like, I'll cut the grass.
We should see.
Or prove your crime that you're innocent.
Yeah.
Like the fugitive.
Like the fugitive, yeah.
I wonder if we should try
to see if we could help someone escape that's what i was thinking i mean i don't know how many
people listen in prison but i think what we're saying is first think it out yeah email us uh
if you think you're like you know what i'm tired of prison email some of you might not be and how
many listeners would be uh you know ready to help as well you as well? You've got an army here.
You've got a force.
We've got a force.
So all the folks would come in and be like, yeah, we need you to do,
don't be doing no crazy crimes.
We need to be something nice and easy.
I feel like I'm the one that people would likely email to try this,
but I'm not going to help.
No, you just want to put that out there right now.
Yeah, I'm not going to help. Save yourself. Dusty, put that out there right now? Yeah, I'm not going to help.
Save your...
Dusty, you know what it's like being in prison.
I've known a few people on probation and whatnot, and I'm not interested.
You didn't even like the pressure of being around that?
No.
That is...
Yeah.
He goes, I'm on probation.
And you're like, okay.
Yeah, I've had quite a few friends get out of jail, and they're like...
And it's fine.
I like hanging out with them, but I'm not... You're not going to help? Nah not gonna help nah all right that's fair that's fair it's good to get that out there
yeah i think brian's into it so if you want to email brian anybody in prison yeah seems like
you're open to it brian's researching a role really so yeah yeah i had a whole character
arc for my my is it gonna be a season two um well let me hear the arc first. Yeah. I think I'm just misunderstood.
Okay.
And I feel like I'm going to get out.
Okay.
I'm guessing with COVID, I'm not going to get out.
You'd be low on the list.
I think you're a serial killer.
Yeah.
So, yeah, you'd be low on the list.
I'm a misunderstood serial killer.
Okay.
I think I'm just insecure.
And I'm going to escape prison, and I'm going to show up in season two
and they're going to realize I'm a decent guy.
Okay.
All right.
I like it.
All right.
I'll throw that into the mix.
I'll talk to Freedy about that.
Yeah, that is a good mix.
He comes out and they go, I'll tell you what.
Larry?
Not bad.
Yeah.
Not bad.
Not a bad guy.
He's a major serial killer.
I go, I know.
It surprised me too.
Yeah, but have you talked to him about baseball?
Yeah.
I mean, the guy knows a lot.
Yeah.
Listen to this Don Mattingly story.
A guy painted nectarines.
He was in prison.
He painted nectarines the color of a grenade to make it look like a grenade
and then told everyone he had a grenade.
So if they don't back off, he's going to blow it up.
His wife took helicopter lessons.
She landed the helicopter on the roof of the prison, and they escaped.
They believed him?
Yeah. They believed him? Yeah.
They believed he had a grenade in prison.
Yeah.
And she landed the helicopter on a football field,
and they still caught up with him somehow.
I guess helicopters, they take a little while to come down and land.
It's a very big sign.
There they are.
Yeah, it's a very big sign. Yeah they are. Yeah, it's a very big sign.
Yeah.
It's just like, this is fun.
They go, it's either tornado or this is my favorite story.
Yeah.
Because I picture the guy's wife coming to visit him,
and he's like, all right, I got a plan.
All right, I'm going to get out of here.
You need to not only learn how to fly a helicopter,
you got to get a helicopter.
She's like, that's a lot.
Like, what are you doing?
He's like, I have to paint a nectarine.
Tangerine, whatever.
What was a nectarine?
I have to paint a nectarine.
How many nectarines are there?
He goes, you wouldn't believe.
He goes, I can mess up for days on these nectarines.
And there's just and they keep coming.
That's such a weird fruit that they would give prisoners.
Yeah.
I don't know if I know what a nectarine is.
I think a small orange.
Small orange.
And he probably ruined it for everybody.
After that, they're like, nothing else that can look like a grenade.
No more nectarines.
All bananas.
All bananas, and the guy paints it as a gun.
Yeah.
Oh, my God.
No more fruit.
All right, asparagus only
yeah it would be
uh yeah it is like how is no one there is a moment though you're like
does he have a grenade like where would he get he get that grenade? Where would he get this? Yeah, do we?
Are we not matter?
Like, you'd want to,
architecture is not a thing anymore.
What are we doing?
Because how are we letting people in?
It's such an odd weapon to have.
Yeah, to be able to somehow have,
how did you get a grenade?
Yeah, just like,
when I'm in the airport, right?
Sometimes, you know,
you go through all the security
and then you're sitting in there
and then after we're through all the security we're sitting they come through with
a dog and the dog's smelling all the bags and i'm like so did the other stuff we just did you're not
you're not sure that's working you know what i mean it's like why is it that you got a dog
smelling bags if i've just gone through security, I don't think most people deal with this problem.
They zero right in on Dusty.
Yeah, 89% of Dusty's flights.
Yeah, Dusty goes, yeah.
I mean, I don't think they can make you switch seats,
but I get asked to switch seats.
I get made to switch seats every time I fly, and that's crazy.
It's always exciting for me at the tsa when
i go through and they do a bag check because you know there's nothing in your bag but then party
is like nervous what's in there everything in my bag it happened to me uh yesterday actually i got
pulled and and i was like what is in that bag what is and it was that uh it was your uh
semi-truck uh oh yeah it was that it was that they didn't know what that was but you're always like
are they gonna pull they is am i gonna be surprised that's almost worse you're like
i don't know where that came from yeah you're in prison then like two weeks later you're like oh
yeah you know what i did buy a gun on yeah yeah come in here all right he got me
um and yeah but it is true why didn't no one ask this guy it's like it feels like one officer goes
how'd you get the grenade he it's like you're just going he just doesn't he free freezes. He's like, I got a grenade. You're like, well, how did you get it?
He's like, someone threw it in.
He goes, like, you just wouldn't be like, just explain because he's away from you.
And so you're back up.
Yeah, because you're back up and then just be like, all right, bud.
I'm going to walk you out.
Let's see what happens.
Let's see what happens.
Just how did you, I would like to, just so we can fix the problem in the future how did you get the grenade yeah well fell down he goes i it does i don't have to
tell you why yeah that's why you have a grenade so i don't have to tell you why i got how i got
a grenade but i got one yeah you don't want to take a chance that he really does have one just
follow his wife's helicopter that's going to take 30 minutes to land with all the wind. And he's like, go higher.
She goes, I don't like to go that high.
I'm new.
I'm new at this.
They're barely above the power lines.
It's like the police are just walking under.
Yeah, it's not hard to track it.
Yeah.
You wouldn't think.
Well, it didn't work.
And Catch Me If You Can, the guy, Frank Abengal, I think is his name, that Leonardo DiCaprio played,
he convinced the prison that he was an undercover inspector just observing the prison to see how they're doing.
And he convinced them so much, they started really giving him special treatment because they wanted a good review for the prison oh like he was a secret shopper kind of yeah like he was in there
undercover yeah guys i'm undercover as a prisoner just to see how you're done letting you know
yeah you know so then they started really just wait that's what he told him yeah yeah and they
believed it wow so they started really like being on up and up giving him special treatment because
they wanted a good review it's like when you come to your restaurant
or whatever, you know,
and then they eventually just let him leave
and walk out.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
Wow.
I'm going to try that.
That guy was great.
Yeah.
Like that's what's crazy with him.
Yeah, he works at the FBI or something
or he did.
He did, I think.
Did he die?
No, I think he's still alive.
Is he out? Like he's out. I don't know. Is that it? I think he's still alive. Is he out?
Like he's out?
I don't know.
Is that it?
Oh, that's Leonardo DiCaprio.
Yeah, he did stuff that...
Maybe that was part of his sentence.
If he worked with them, he got a lighter sentence to help them.
Yeah, he's still alive.
Yeah, he does.
I think he worked...
In the movie, they get him working for the FBI.
Yeah, you can.
I mean, it's funny because this guy is just like a super smart,
like just charming.
Charm is gigantic.
I think charm is a very overlooking factor.
Charm is how you get out of everything get you out of
a lot of scrapes right yeah and because you you if you're if you can just be super charming
and trust and all that like that's how you get if you're in this kind of life that's how you get
I mean every in anything but that's how you get far and I like that ploy of like you know people are nervous
about their jobs and so if you can be charming enough and convince them that you're there to
did you when you worked at applebee's did you ever have a secret
customer come in i had that happen once yeah mine did not work out well oh really i read the report
and they said that they had asked about because i I didn't, I was not a good waiter at this
place called Dalt's. It was owned by TGI Fridays and I didn't have the menu memorized. Oh, you do?
Okay. I didn't have the menu memorized or anything. So I read the report and it said, we asked him
about the salad dressings and he clearly did not know what salad dressings were. So he pointed to
the menu and told us to read it saying he'd hate to leave out our favorites
and then towards the end of the meal that's a good line you know i that well there was the
where the charm came in yeah yeah yeah i didn't cover it up and then and then he said he said
that at one point i offered free sodas and desserts because i didn't have to run it through
the register as long as they hooked me up with a good tip which was my go-to move
oh that's a tough but i didn't know i would get caught but i didn't get fired because i was uh
the the shortstop on the softball team and we were doing pretty good so i just got reprimanded
yeah yeah it's important but it was shocking to know that i was being spied on yeah and no idea
no idea no idea no idea no just idea. No idea. No idea.
No.
Just be like, hey, how you doing?
Is that when you got down on one knee next to the table?
You go, guys, come on.
Listen, guys.
Listen.
You know, we want some free cheesecake.
Soda's out of control.
You know, I worked at a restaurant.
They had a sign that said, if your drinks don't appear on the receipt,
let us know and you'll get $20.
And that was the restaurant's way.
The way that they were trying to keep up.
Right.
Oh, I got it.
So I had a table one time.
Something happened and I never, you know, because I knew I could get fired.
So I was like, something happened with some drinks.
And I was like, here, I'll just give you this one and I'll not charge you for it.
You know, and then the bartender calls me and he goes, hey, there's some people down here trying to get the 20 bucks.
And I went down there and they go, oh, yeah, we just thought you didn't charge us.
We thought we won.
I go, no, you're going to get me in trouble.
They were like, oh, sorry.
And then they left.
Wait, the bartender, were you at home?
No, the bartender was, no, I was upstairs.
The bartender was my friend and he called me on the restaurant phone.
Yeah, he was trying to not get me fired.
I thought you went home.
Oh, and then I had to come back.
And then he calls you at home.
He goes, hey.
He goes, Dusty, you want to head on back down?
And you go back down.
No, I mean, I could have.
I live close.
But I might have just said, let me get fired.
Well, you were more honest than I was, I think.
I would not charge people soda sometimes at
the beginning because you think it's going to get you a bigger tip and it doesn't nah because it's
it's about the price they tip off the price and when you first start you don't realize that and
you think like hey i'm hooking you up you'd have to say it like that yeah you had to say it or you'd
have to have some regulars that knew like my sister worked around the corner and she'd come in and sit in my section and get a soda a soup a salad and a dessert all four items you just make yourself as
a waiter and then she'd leave a nice tip and walk out of there and you gotta let them know you're
robin hood i'm robin hood here oh yeah you were i was robin i don't know what the statute of
limitations but i may go to prison for this. This could go full circle.
This could go.
You could be talking in a couple weeks about how I'm in prison.
Just call me Robin Dalts.
Yeah, I thought Dalts was out of business.
I thought I had immunity at this point.
I didn't know there was one in the area.
I'm going to go to Dalts tonight, and I'm going to present them with a check.
Yeah.
And just to make sure I don't get in trouble.
I'm going to take UberX over there, and I'm going to give them their money back.
It is funny that it's like you say this, you're like,
I don't know, it's a dumb restaurant, Dalt's.
Bates is like, me and my mom are going there tonight.
And you're like, what's up?
They're still around.
He goes, yeah, right around the corner.
It was delicious.
They had great food.
But the one by me closed down.
A lot of salad dressings. Too many to me closed down. A lot of salad dressing.
It's too many to memorize, honestly.
A lot of salad dressing.
I remember one time I went in too and it said the special of the soup was gazpacho.
And I'd never even heard of gazpacho.
I didn't know how to pronounce it or anything.
And I went to the manager.
I said, what's gazpacho?
And he says, it's just the salsa.
Just give him a bowl of the salsa.
I don't think that's how gazpacho works.
Is it a nice restaurant? It's nice, yeah yeah yeah it's it's nice the one on white bridge road's pretty nice yeah
is it but is it like uh you know like a tgi friday's or like jay alexander's i think it
tried to be or not tried it it's owned by tgi friday so i think maybe it's like would you say
that it's like a little bit elevated from TGI Fridays?
Yeah.
I mean, the one on White Bridge Road is pretty old, but.
Okay.
I think that was the intention.
Yeah.
I think that's what I kind of.
A restaurant you could celebrate on any day, really.
Yeah.
You know.
It'd be like, but you go to Dalts would be like, we're going on a date night.
Yeah.
We're going to go to Dalts.
These jokes are good.
But if this was in Virginia, I'd get a lot of like, you know, the lady will have the fajitas and I will have the taquitos.
Oh, yeah.
And then I'd just go like, well, have you tried the quesadillas?
Yeah.
Because that's good too.
You know, I just play into it.
It is hard when the table pronounces something wrong
and you know the right way to pronounce it,
but now you have to repeat the order back to them.
It's like, do I say it wrong or do I correct them?
No, I'd go right into it.
I don't want to be uppity to them.
I don't want to ruin their good time.
So you had the Fajitas.
The Fajitas, and you had the Taquitos.
Yeah.
David Spade on his new special talks just about that,
how he'll purposely say something wrong just to mess with the server,
just to see their head explode.
I struggled with what, euros?
Because the first time I went to New York City,
I pointed in the menu and the guy goes, the gyros.
And I'm like, is that, that's how it is?
That is gyros?
And then everybody says euros.
I thought it was gyros.
Or heroes.
Yeah, I've heard it all three ways.
Heroes?
Yeah, I've heard heroes. three ways yeah heroes yeah i've heard
heroes i think when i was in greece i heard that i just had one i don't eat a lot of those and i
just had one a week ago because when i drove by this restaurant the comedian brody stevens yeah
there was a huge mural of brody stevens on the side of the restaurant and then it said enjoy it
brody stevens and i thought you know what i'm gonna go
in here just based on that yeah and it was as disorganized and confused on the inside as brody
was at the end of the day what's that yeah mural's nice i don't know what that means yeah yeah all
right yeah but uh yeah had a hero i thought someone who escaped, and at least for a while,
what did stay out on the island was El Chapo.
Oh, yeah.
When they built that underground tunnel for him.
Was that in Mexico, though?
Yeah.
Mexico is a little different.
I mean, I think Mexico, I think you're a chump if you stay.
Yeah.
Like, that seems like that's a revolving door that if you can't get out of a
Mexican prison, it's like, well, what do we do?
Especially if you're a drug lord.
He's done it a couple times, right?
Hasn't he done it a couple times?
Yeah, that's why they were like, we're going to send you here.
And it's like, it's not good.
He hasn't got out again.
I don't think he, those guys, you do not want to go to a U.S. prison.
Yeah.
Like in Mexico, it seems like they can, I mean, they go to that prison.
It's like, I mean, they're going to be out in an hour.
Well, if it's anything like the TV shows I watch,
because that's where I get all my information,
then it seems like it's a little looser of a system
where you can kind of get people to turn the other way.
Yeah, there's a movie called Get the Gringo with Mel Gibson.
I don't know if you've seen that.
And I thought it was a good movie, but the prison that he's in,
I don't know if you've seen that. And I thought it was a good movie, but the prison that he's in, I don't know if that's accurate,
but it seems like it's almost like he's in a small city.
Yeah.
The prison is like,
there's just things going on in there,
but you just can't leave.
Yeah, like there's kids selling stuff.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's like you're walking down a town.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm just shocked you haven't seen Shawshank, but you've seen Get the Gringotts.
That's what I'm taking away from this whole episode.
Am I going to watch it again tonight?
Yeah.
Oh, I wanted to say this.
This is random, but I did want to say this, that I listen to the podcast every week, and
I love it.
And I go on walks, and I listen to it.
The hardest I've ever laughed is when I woke up one morning i looked at the title and it said candy part two
that's the hardest i've ever left just by the title
and my dream is that even though whatever we talk about today it's called candy part three
we had to get back into it yeah no i there was too much on the table yeah yeah i loved it i loved
it there was a guy in korea who was a yoga instructor and he could contort his body so he
went to prison and he found a way to slide himself through the food slot like they had the bars and
just the little slot that you put your tray in.
Wow.
And he contorted his body to get through there.
Go through there and then found a way out through the kitchen kind of thing.
I guess so, yeah.
Imagine getting through the food slot and then being like,
oh, they're like, what are you doing out here?
Get back in there.
Because it's not, it'll take a while.
Yeah.
And there's not a lot of food slots throughout the whole.
Well, you know, he gets to the food slot, he's like,
he's just like cracking his neck.
He looks over and there's two more food slots.
Oh, man.
Yeah, he's like, oh, man.
Like that hurt.
And now he's got to just go back in the food.
Do it again?
Yeah, I mean, because he probably had to try it.
So then he's.
What, did he get stuck?
I mean, what if they, they yeah he's just in there one
day they open it he's just sitting in it in the food and the food slot's so big you can get your
head through i imagine that if you can get your head through it the rest of the body's not that
hard no once you get your head through something apparently you can get the rest of your body
body through it how do you get your head through yeah i don't know yeah still seems like your
shoulders would have a hard time.
Yeah.
Shoulders or not.
You go, what do you think about the shoulders?
He goes, that's tough.
He goes, it's all head to shoulders.
Once you get past that, he goes, I mean, you couldn't even lock me in.
I'm going to commit, I'm going to admit another crime here.
But when I was little, my parents were furniture shopping.
And they had like a snack machine in the back
with candy in it and it was one of those old time ones and i reached my hand up to try to get to the
candy and got stuck and i got stuck in there with my literally with my hand in the cookie jar and i
had to be yelling and they came and my parents stood there while they had to go get a crowbar
and get me out of this thing and i was there there for like 15 minutes. I was like, what were you doing? I was like, nothing.
Don't worry about it.
Nothing.
You're just looking at your own fingers.
Yeah.
Just so close to that juicy fruit gum right there.
Did they throw you some candy?
No, they should have.
But no, I was reprimanded.
Lesson learned.
Yeah.
Lesson learned.
That's a good way.
Some dumb criminals.
There's so many of them. There's a good way. Some dumb criminals. There's so many of them.
There's now TV shows just about dumb criminals.
I found one, though, from last month that I thought was pretty good.
This is in Georgia.
A guy called the police at McDonald's to complain about his fries being lukewarm, not hot.
Police showed up, and there's video of all this from BodyCam.
He complains that the manager
you know his eyes were cold and then he complained about it and then the guy goes and talks to the
manager turns out the guy who called the police complained had outstanding warrants for a homicide
so he uh they eventually figure out what's going on he kind of freaks out they chase him through
the mcdonald's parking lot and they tase him and now he's in prison but a guy wanted for murder calls police because his fries are cold wow yeah
i i wonder if you like a guy that's in that state if you just forget that you murdered someone yeah
i think you probably convinced yourself that it didn't happen and then you're you know and it's
been long enough that you eventually just go, my fries are cold.
And they're doing this on purpose.
Yeah, I watched the police body cam.
And they asked the guy's name.
And you could tell he's a little hesitant, like, oh, you want to get into this?
But he gives them his name.
Then the guy goes and talks to the manager.
Comes out and he says, look, here's the deal.
The manager said he'll refund your money.
Are you OK with that?
But he wants you to never come in this McDonald's again.
And the guy goes, I don't even live here.
You know, I ain't going to come.
He's like, yeah, but you got to fill out this thing.
Just saying that you're never come again.
And he's about to get away with just leave.
But then all of a sudden the guy just freaks out and he takes the clipboard.
He's like, I don't trust you guys.
I'm standing over here.
And he's like, what's your problem?
And he finally just takes off running and then they chase him. then they find out later he's wanted for murder oh they didn't
even look it up no he just kind of freaked out like maybe while they was inside talking the
manager he started thinking about he's like oh i have killed a guy yeah yeah i've gotten away with
that maybe the cold fries is not that big of a deal after all i'm i find it
interesting that the cops even chased him too because like if that guy is just like you got
to be like oh my god we're wasting our time right warm fries and if the guy freaks out and just runs
into the woods i think i'm like all right that's done solves that yeah that solves that but that
guy ruined it for all the other people that are just trying to call about lukewarm fries and run in the woods.
Because you're going to be like, well, I got to assume all of you killed someone.
Because the one time I went and chased him, that guy killed someone.
And you're like, I didn't kill anybody.
I just am so mad.
I think that's the lesson.
If you have warm fries, stay on your ground.
There's a little bit, too, that you want to say from McDonald's.
Y'all need to get it together at your places because you're driving people to this insanity your ice
cream machines broke your your fries are not always you know it's like they can be sitting
there like mcdonald's you want to go like people expect a product we like mcdonald's yeah and some
of this is so this is on mcdonald's as much as on that guy. Yeah. I mean, keep it hot.
Keep it hot.
I mean, what are you doing?
Yeah.
Why are we here?
I mean, there's murderers trying to eat too.
Yeah.
And they need it quick.
Yeah.
Maybe Burger King came out with a slogan.
Like, Burger King, you won't go to prison.
Yeah.
We got your back.
Yeah.
Fries are hot.
Yeah.
We keep our mouths shut.
Fries so hot you won't need to call the police.
Yeah.
There you go.
I like that.
That should be like their mission statement.
Or what is their kind of slogan should be like,
we don't want a guy that just got done murdering a guy.
He comes in here, has a nice meal.
He's probably a little stressed and hot yeah give
him some hot fries but i'm loving it yeah that's the new commercial that's good yeah keep them out
yeah yeah are we is it yeah i wanted to ask you about your fake towns or that you put here i
noticed raising hope but they were in natesville yeah yeah so um
after me yep after you before i met you i thought i had a premonition um yeah all the towns like uh
earl is camden county that's my oldest son camden okay uh raising hope is natesville for my middle
son nathan okay then we had uh for me yep then we had the the the guest book was in season one was in mount
trace for my son trace then i skipped my wife and uh whose name is kim because i couldn't think of
anything at the time so then uh guest book season two they lived at mabel beach which is my dog
so i went dog yeah dog next and then for sprung was like, I can't think of something for Kim.
And then the set decorator said, how about Kimberton?
And I was like, oh, perfect.
Oh, perfect.
So we went with Kimberton.
Yeah.
So now everybody's been represented.
And so-
Now I can retire.
Oh, I thought you were going to get a divorce and get a new family.
Yeah.
Well, that too.
So when will you do the next family, the other family that you-
Oh, the secret family?
The secret family?
Soon.
Soon, soon. Yeah. Yeah. I look forward? The secret family? Soon. Soon, soon.
Yeah.
I look forward to a dusty town at some point.
Yeah.
You know, an old Wild West type village.
Yeah.
Most of the towns I write about are dusty, so that'll fit right in.
Perfect.
Yeah, we'll get that in there.
I may have to adopt you first to make it all legit.
That's okay.
I could use it.
But yeah.
He doesn't have a dad.
If you apply to college again,
we're going to have to lie about my finances
if you want that Pell grant.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
We're going to have to do some fudging on the paperwork.
Someone said that maybe Mr. Pell had died, I believe.
Yeah.
But his son, Pell Jr., is still out there,
so he can get a smaller grant.
Okay.
Well, that's it.
Yeah.
Because I want to end on a story. Okay. Well, that's it. Yeah. Because I want to end on a story.
Okay.
That with Greg, that's a wonderful story about the writer's strike.
And I don't know if you had that.
I think it's a good story to tell.
Yeah, sure.
I don't know if anybody knows this.
But when the writer's strike was in, when was the writer's strike?
2008, I believe.
Yeah, 2008.
And I feel like this story sums up great.
And I love it.
And it's, yeah, 2008, I actually wrote for a show during the writer's strike.
I was the opposite.
You were scabbed.
You were scabbed.
I can think of all that.
The first, I wrote for this Spike Video Game Awards.
And I was like a comic. And I got wrote wrote for it and then it was like the strike happened and it's like you're just like you know
it's like well are we not supposed to be right and they didn't put our names on the credits to
like i guess so we don't get in trouble yeah but you're like we're not even writers dude like we're
it's not like you were in the guild and you were breaking i don't blame you at all yeah i was like i didn't even know what's happening in your uh but i remember it was a big
day like we're not putting your name on and then i even still i kind of wanted they would have
really asked me i'd be like i still would like it on yeah i'd like some acknowledgement yeah
parents are gonna watch this yeah my parents i don't know what's happening with this like
what is a guild i don't know so but they with this. Like, what is a guild?
I don't know.
But they went on strike.
The writers went on strike.
And it was a big thing.
And then you can.
Well, a long time ago, I was eating at a Roy Rogers when I was doing the show Yes, Dear.
And I was, because I love Roy Rogers hamburgers.
Love them.
And I was watching the people behind the counter.
And they're working hard.
And I thought, I've had hard jobs.
I grew up doing landscaping, whatever, pumping gas, and real jobs.
And at that time, I was running a show.
And I was pampered and stuff.
What was the show?
Yes, Dear.
Yes, Dear. It was the show I was doing at the time.
And I thought, I wonder if I could go back and do an honest day's work where I'm not
pampered.
And I started thinking, that would be a fun book write. Like I'll do a different job every month. And in my mind,
I would get to know the people and it would be funny because I'd be talking about my own
struggles with it and everything. And then I just to have a game show element, I would pick one
person that I work with, give them $10,000 and then just disappear and then go do another thing.
So while you're reading the book, maybe you're like, oh, who's he going to give it to?
Whatever.
But I had that idea, but then I just kept working.
I never had time to do it or try it.
And then I started watching, seeing like 30 Days with Morgan Spurlacker
and Undercover Boss, and all these things started coming up.
And I was like, ah, people are already kind of doing this.
But then the writer's strike hit.
And all of a sudden, I had free time.
And I thought, let me try this one time.
Let me just see
if i can do it as an experiment and plus you had to pick it as a as a writer you had to like go
out there and pick it all day with a sign and i asked him i said what if you have a job like what
if you have another job they're like oh you don't have to pick it if you have another job and i was
like all right well good because i don't want to pick it yeah so let me go this is gonna kill two
birds with one stone yeah so um so yeah i drove drove one exit past my house to try to get past a little bit of the fast food
people would go to in my neighborhood.
And there was a Jack in the Box and a McDonald's and a Burger King.
And I went into each one of them.
And at the Burger King, they said, we'll sit down and fill out the application.
And then we'll have an interview.
And I was like, oh, man, I wasn't prepared for that to happen right away, right?
And because my driver's license, I got to explain my address.
I live in a neighborhood with the Kardashians.
But Kevin Durant moved in around the corner.
He's sitting there.
It's like, how am I going to explain this?
So they sat down.
She sat down, the manager, and she interviewed me.
And I told her that I worked for a family.
I lived with a family and I helped take care of the kids.
And so I said, I can only work during the school hours, which I also thought, like, I'd worked so hard.
I didn't want to say to my kids, now that dad has some time off, rather than spend time with you, he's going to go work at Burger King.
So I worked from, so I got hired.
What family would hire you to take care of their kids?
No, no family.
I mean, that goes the opposite.
No family.
Yeah.
None.
So I worked 10 to 2 Monday through Friday.
I got the job.
And so I showed up the first day, and they gave me my uniform, and it was too small.
They gave me a small.
I couldn't even tuck it in.
I showed a little midriff there, and the shirt was real small.
And I just started working there.
And I'd go home every day and I'd write some notes about it and try to come up with funny stuff and get to know the other people that worked there and everything. And I'd have a couple of friends
that knew about it that would come in and have lunch and just kind of sit there and watch me.
And one time my wife and kid came. But after about two weeks, i started running out of stuff to write about now i'm just working at burger king at this point i'm just i'm just working at burger king really and i
thought man i could like mess around with people like i could mess around if i wanted to maybe
that would be interesting if i like started messing around but i was like everybody's working
hard in here i don't want to be the jerk who's like not taking this seriously so i was a cashier
and a janitor i clean the bathrooms i clean up clean up the tables and stuff and just do all that stuff. There was a couple of times where like, there was
this one guy that had an Orange County choppers hat on that show that they used to do motorcycles.
And I had been on an episode because they did a My Name is Earl bike. And so I did say to him,
I was like, I knew I was going to be quitting soon. I was like, hey man, remember this? You
watch that show? He goes, yeah. I go, watch this Thursday show. I said, just remember me.
And he was like, okay. So I'm sure that kind of blew his mind. He was like, what in the world?
But yeah, but then it kind of, I heard the strike was going to end. So I went to my manager and I
sat her down after my shift and I said, you know, I'm going to be leaving today. And she was like,
what are you talking about? And she liked me a lot being, she tried to get me in the management
trainee program. Yeah. She came to me after two weeks and she said, I want you to be leaving today. And she was like, what are you talking about? And she liked me a lot. She tried to get me in the management trainee program.
Yeah, she came to me after two weeks.
And she said, I want you to come in the management trainee program.
And I said, I can't.
You know, this family I live with.
And she's like, Greg, you have to worry about your future.
You have to think about yourself, not other people.
So I sat her down.
And I said, look, it's my last day.
And she's like, why, why?
And I said, look, I'm going to be honest with you.
I'm actually a television writer.
And I'm working on a book. And I told her there was actually a book because I didn't want the next part to be awkward. So I said, I said, I'm working on this book and I'm
doing different jobs and now I need to do a different job. And she goes, oh man, now I have
to hire someone else. And I go, yeah, I know. I said, that was part of this that I didn't even
think that I was kind of put you in a bad spot. So I feel bad about that. But, and I said, but
here's the thing. I said, the publisher of the book, which again, there was none, but I said, the
publisher of the book wants me to give something to one person. And, and I had picked her because
I got to know her the best. And she was a really hardworking woman with this backstory. And, and,
and I said, so I do have something for you. And I gave her a cashier's check for $10,000.
And then all of a sudden she was like, oh my God, oh my God, you can keep the shirt if you want.
And she was just confused as heck.
And I left.
I remember calling my buddy, Alan Kirshenbaum, this other writer.
And I said, yeah, I gave her the check.
She seemed kind of confused.
And he goes, oh, why is she confused?
Maybe because it's the craziest thing that's ever happened to her.
So then the next day I went back to picketing and
my phone rang and it was her. And she said, listen, I just wanted to say thanks again.
And I Googled you and we love my name is Earl. And I think we're going to use the money for our
kids' education or maybe get a big TV.
I said, look, it's your money.
You do what you want with it.
And she goes, but I did tell my bosses.
I got a little nervous, so I told my bosses, and they might be calling you, the Burger King.
Not the king himself, but, you know.
And I said, that's fine.
They can call me.
So about an hour later, I get a call from a guy.
He says, ah, it's so-and-so from Burger King Corporation. I hear you've been working at one of our stores, Mr. Garcia. I said, yeah, yeah, yeah. I hear you're writing a book.
And I go, listen, first of all, there's no real book. I don't know if there'll ever be a book,
and it's not like Fast Food Nation. I'm not trying to do some expose. It's about the people that
work there. And I explained the whole thing to him. I said, if anything, my wife said this was
going to turn me off of fast food. If anything, it's the opposite. I've never seen a place run so well, so clean.
I said, and he goes, you can mention Burger King anytime you want.
Please do.
And then he sent me a card.
He sent me a little gold card, Burger King card.
I get free Burger King for the rest of my life.
Oh, wow.
Yeah, so I have that.
And I don't use it a ton, but I-
$10,000 well spent.
Yeah, I know, right?
And so what I do now is I do use it.
I go into a Burger King and just everybody in line.
I'm like, hey, guys, I got this.
You get a Whopper.
You get a Whopper.
You get a Whopper.
And people get confused.
And there'll be some people that'll be like, I can get my own food.
I can get my own food.
I'm like, okay, but it's free.
Don't worry.
And I can get it.
And one time I was sitting there and afterwards, and one was sitting next to me, standing next
to me, we're both waiting for the food.
And she said, why do you have a free Burger King card?
And I said, you know, it's a long story, but basically I worked for them
and they gave it to me as a gift afterwards.
And she goes, oh, I should have got fries.
I said, you want fries?
We're going to add some fries on there.
But I'm still the manager.
We're still friends.
We text all the time
she came over my house hung out for a while with her kids and it turned into a whole thing man she
she called me one time she was having trouble with her husband i ended up on the phone with
him for about two and a half hours talking through that i mean it turned this story could go on for
hours trust me there's a lot to be told but that was the gist of it that was the gist of it it was
it was a fun time and again it was an experience I used some of that in a show I did called Super Clyde.
It didn't get on, but it was just going out there and doing something goofy.
Yeah, it makes me want to do it.
It's the idea.
Sometimes you do want to kind of go back.
And I think people could even want that, not even like this career,
but the older you get, the more you could be it's a you know in your head it's a simpler time of just your i work at this
restaurant and there was something very you know zen about the job compared to what i used to be
doing because i'd go out and wipe the tables down for like 20 minutes and it was like this is i don't
have to think about anything else i'm just doing this and everything and so but that was you know obviously there's people working there that
have two jobs you know they're not like having a zen experience but i'm just talking about my
experience in fact she said to me once i said i said to her i go hey um why sometimes i hear you
guys speak in spanish and then i hear my name i said what were you guys saying about me and they
were like she was like we couldn't believe a white guy was lasting this long yeah she's like we've had white guys before
they don't last this long in this job and then she also said to me one time about a year later
she goes you know I was telling Enrique you know the other day and he was just standing around and
I said Greg wouldn't be standing around Greg would be going to and I go no no no no no no Greg was
there as a bit he was writing a book no you
can't use me enrique has two jobs he drives domino pizza at night let him take a break like don't use
me as an example that's not what this was about yeah by any means but yeah it was a trip that's
awesome i love that is a great story yeah that's really great i've always loved that story. All right. As always, well, I would love all you.
And then go watch Sprung.
I've watched it.
It's awesome.
Season finale this week, right?
Season finale this Friday.
And then all 10 of them will be up there and available to binge watch for the rest of your life.
Rest of your life.
Yep.
It's a super fun show.
I remember reading this.
You sent me this script.
And it was just like, it's just such a fun idea. It's a super fun show. I remember reading this. You sent me this script, and it was just like, it's just such a fun idea.
It's a great show.
So thanks for coming on.
Yeah, I'll be, when does this, this comes out this week.
I'm in Thousand Oaks, Long Beach, San Francisco, New Mexico,
and then four shows in Phoenix, taping the special.
So next time I come back, I'll be, special will be taped.
This Thursday, I'm in Springfield, Missouri.
First time ever to Springfield.
That's where the Bass Pro Shop is, right?
It's a big one.
Yeah.
I'll have to check that out.
I'm at Billiards of Springfield.
It's a pool hall, I guess, and they also do comedy shows.
So I'll be there Thursday night, so please come to that. And friday and saturday i'm at helium comedy club in st louis
oh all right look at that yeah big this is happening yeah well i'll be at the greenville
south carolina comedy zone this weekend i just was in jacksonville i wanted to show this this
little girl made a card too dusty from elizabeth she said, uh, hello, I watch you in the Nate land podcast.
And then she drew a picture of me.
Oh,
that's all.
She says,
Hey bear.
And we're having a good time.
Ooh,
that's awesome.
Maybe show the camera instead of us.
Yeah.
That's you.
Yeah.
Sorry,
Elizabeth.
Sorry about that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But that's very nice.
Yeah.
But yeah, I was at Jacksonville comedy zone. We had a lot of fun this week greenville south carolina comedy zone it's gonna be great yeah and if this uh if this comes out tomorrow i'll be in the
nashville area at various dalts giving away free sodas and desserts where they find you at uh they
find you a burger king yep you know i'll be there he He'll be at Burger King. Wait, there's a Burger King
at the airport.
We could go get
free Burger King?
Yeah.
Oh, the airport might be
the only place
that doesn't take it.
Here we go.
Here we go.
I mean, we can try,
but it'll be a discussion.
It'll be a discussion.
All right.
We love you.
Thank you as always
for listening,
and we will see you
next week.
Bye. we love you thank you as always for listening and we will see you next week bye Nateland is produced
by Nateland Productions
and by me
Nate Bargetzi
and my wife Laura
on the All Things
Comedy Network
recording and editing
for the show
is done by
Genovations Media.
Thanks for tuning in. Be sure to catch us next week on the Nateland Podcast.