The Nateland Podcast - #123 Superheroes
Episode Date: November 9, 2022This week, the guys are joined by a special guest to start the show. Then, Nate, Aaron, Brian, and Dusty get down to business discussing the important topic of superheroes. The guys look at failed sup...erheroes, discuss what super power each would have, and debate whether it would be better to be able to fly or be invisible.   Podcast produced by Nate & Laura Bargatze Recording & Editing by Genovations Media https://www.natebargatze.com https://www.allthingscomedy.com https://www.genovationsmedia.com Email - Nateland@NateBargatze.com  Athletic Greens - AthleticGreens.com/Nate  Right now, it’s time to reclaim your health and help your immune system with convenient, daily nutrition - especially heading into the flu and cold season! It is just one scoop in a cup of water every day. That is it! No need for a million different pills and supplements to look out for your health. To make it easy, Athletic Greens Is going to give you a FREE 1 year supply of immune-supporting Vitamin D AND 5 FREE travel packs with your first purchase. All you have to do is visit ATHLETICGREENS.com/NATE. Again, that’s ATHLETICGREENS.com/NATE to take ownership over your health and pick up the ultimate daily nutritional insurance!   Rocketmoney - RocketMoney.com/Nate  Cancel unnecessary subscriptions with Rocket Money today. Go to RocketMoney.com/nate. Seriously, it could save you HUNDREDS per year. That’s RocketMoney.com/nate.   Mizzen and Main - MizzenandMain.com  ·     If you want the BEST cold-weather clothing this holiday season, check out Mizzen+Main. Right now if you go to MizzenAndMain.com and use promo code NATE, you’ll receive $35 off any regular price order of $125 or more.  ·      That’s $35 off when you go to MIZZENANDMAIN.com and use our promo code NATE.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
hello folks and hey bear welcome to the nateland podcast sitting here with dusty slay uh aaron
weber and a new guest with breakfast little Little Breakfast. Hello, folks.
Hello, folks.
Hello.
We got a little visitor.
It was roughly a year ago.
It was exactly a year ago today that I revealed it in the recording, November 1st when we
recorded it.
And it came out a few days later.
But yeah.
Yeah.
One year ago, I told you guys I was having, my wife was having a baby, and there she is.
Here we are.
I still don't believe it.
Look at you.
Good size.
She's getting big.
So yeah.
She's doing great.
She's doing great.
We wanted Eleanor to say hi to everybody.
The headphones are just for fun.
Yeah, yeah.
She doesn't need them.
Yeah. Just people to go. The headphones are just for fun. She doesn't need them.
Yeah, just people to go.
She was born with those headphones on.
All right.
All right, we're passing her off to Abigail.
Eleanor, put her out back in the car.
Bye, honey.
What if it was a whole, he has no wife baby we're just we're just going through it you know gotta keep the charade gonna keep the charade going nate paid to have a baby here that's
my baby yeah felt good yeah it feels good i love an ad rate yeah yeah you look like a walking ad. Yeah. And I would think, you know, growing up where you grew up, you guys are four ads.
Yeah.
NASCAR, you know.
Yeah, NASCAR is advertising.
It's advertising.
Yeah, absolutely.
Yeah.
They really figured it out.
It's almost so much advertising that it takes out the advertising.
Like, you don't think about it.
Whoa.
Because it's just, that's what it what it is right it's the bud car it's the you know and you end up supporting the whatever your driver is you support whatever their ad is yeah like even my
family would get into like ford chevy arguments if their driver drove a ford versus their driver driving a chevy
they act like ford and chevy has some kind of uh investment in their lives yeah which one were you
uh we were always ford oh found on road dead yeah or or uh first on race day is what we would fix
on repair day yeah oh look at that you know a bunch of them yeah there's a few fix or repair
daily that was one.
Found on Road Dead, you said that, right? What was for Chevy?
I don't know that we had any.
Yeah, it's tough to.
Is it a long one?
Yeah.
Chevrolet is tough to.
Yeah.
I remember a lot of bumper stickers of the kid from Calvin and Hobbes
peeing on a Chevy logo.
Yeah, there'd be a lot of that, too.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Felt like a bit much.
Well, people like the cars, you know.
And they...
It was a lot. I remember seeing a lot of that,
too. People didn't want to see it.
I'm told I remember
people who would not buy Japanese-made
cars because of World War II.
Wow.
I never heard that. Made in America, buddy.
I mean, I always remember the support of Made in America cars,
but I don't remember that because of World War II.
That is intense.
Oh, there's some people I know who are still alive that are like that.
Yeah.
I remember Elvis being alive, like the big conspiracy about that.
I remember that.
Okay. I mean, I don't know. I distinctly remember it being on Unsolved Mysteries or something. being alive like the the big conspiracy about that oh i remember that okay i thought you i mean
i don't know like you know but like like i distinctly remember it being like on unsolved
mysteries it's still going it was i know it's still going but it was there was it was on like
main tv like they were is he alive and all that kind of stuff like i do i remember uh a big debate
now i feel like it would be you know a conspiracy or something and but you'd have to read about it
and be like he almost he could still be alive but it would he'd be know, a conspiracy or something, but you'd have to read about it and be like, he almost –
he could still be alive, but he'd be very old.
But back then it was like –
Oh, yeah.
They were like, oh, we think –
I mean, I remember seeing on regular TV,
like they're showing video of like him in Florida or something
or in Hawaii or something.
I think it was Jerry Glanville, football coach,
that would leave tickets at the game for Elvis.
Oh, really? He would leave would leave tickets at the game for elvis oh really
he would leave two tickets at every home game for elvis just to come to the game and it was just
like a thing he did who's that jerry glanville yeah i think he uh he's a former football guy i
think maybe even coach the wallers yeah and the falcons and uh and i think that's right that he
would leave tickets for Elvis at the game.
He was a former NASCAR driver and the head coach of the Alabama Airborne of Major League
Football.
I guess I got my guy wrong, man.
I thought it was NFL.
I may start leaving a couple tickets for Elvis.
I mean, the fact that you know that guy, and he coached at Alabama Airborne of the Major
League Football.
MLF.
MLF.
I mean, I've never even heard of that.
Will you Google who left tickets? It was Jerry Glanville. It was him? Yeah. YeahF. MLF. I mean, I've never even heard of it. Will you Google who left tickets?
It was Jerry Glanville.
It was him?
Yeah.
He was the head coach of the Oilers from 85 to 89.
You're right.
He would leave tickets at Wilco for Elvis Presley.
They kind of buried that in his Wikipedia page.
I would lead with head coach of the Oilers.
Well, maybe that's because he left the tickets,
that they were like, let's kind of push this guy to the side here.
Oh, Dusty, I got a new conspiracy theory for you that I feel like you'll be on board with.
I just heard this.
So Tennessee has new license plates.
Okay.
Oh, boy.
You guys know that?
They're all blue now.
So you can choose between one that says, in God we trust, and one that doesn't.
It's very small.
But once you get it, the plates look different.
One of them has three letters, and the other one has get it, the plates look different. Like one of them has three letters and the other one has four.
And the makeup's different.
The conspiracy is the deep state's trying to separate us to people who, you know, believe in God who don't.
Oh, yeah.
Well, that's not even a conspiracy.
Yeah.
That's a lot to bring in when you just had your baby in here.
Well, she had the headphones on. Yeah, that's a lot to bring in when you just had your baby in here. Well, she had the headphones on, so.
Yeah, that's true.
I mean, this is the opening.
Yeah.
And we get right in it.
Here it is.
It's a very small difference.
Yeah, I don't see the.
But they add In God We Trust around the TriStar.
Well, the ones that don't have it have three letters and then
four letters on the front
and then three on the other side.
That shows it the same, but that's not the case.
Interesting.
Well, we're getting into it.
Yeah.
Well, I just thought Dusty.
I mean, yeah.
Anytime I hear a conspiracy, I just want to tell Dusty about it.
Usually he's already ahead of it.
Well, no. I mean, I don a conspiracy, I just want to tell Dusty about it. Yeah. Usually he's already had of it. Well, no.
I mean, I don't care for the new tags, but.
I got one that has a bear on it.
Yeah, see that right there.
Oh, here you go.
If you got In God We Trust, it's three on the left and then four on the right.
But if you don't, it's the reverse.
That is.
Why would they do that?
Well, they want to.
That still seems to be the same.
It still seems to be the same there.
Actually, when you look at it what do you mean are there unless there's letters that they put the numbers on the left and then the numbers are on the right that's still three and four yeah i
can't believe i just counted it wrong like that yeah wow and you got that shirt on notre dame
wearing it you thought today you know what i think i'm gonna i'm gonna put you no hitter today
and you get uh wearing a notre dame shirt get knocked out of the park immediately
you go i tell you what boys i go record this game i fill it and then boom immediately knocked out
wow all right we'll dive into that later on in the news uh what's the weather today uh oh oh dude this came up so this is fun
a little podcast history here this is a video by sunny v2 i guess he's some big youtube guy
this video is 2.6 million views it came out five days ago he did an expose on planet fitness
yeah two ways yeah so the only two ways you have to physically come in to cancel your
are you saying it's a guy?
Oh, man.
This is great.
There it is.
It's just fun to be included in that.
Wow, so they put your video in there like it's...
I mean, you are serious.
This is journalism, and I'm
a part of it. I'm a source. You're someone that
saw the tornado.
That's what you look like.
There he goes.
This is the second thing you've showed me like that
about you today, though. Oh, yeah.
I'm making the rounds. I'm wearing an American
flag shirt in this video, too.
I love that. This is how crisis actors start, because they're like, Yeah, I'm making the rounds. I'm wearing an American flag shirt in this video too. I do look funny. Yeah.
I love that.
This is how crisis actors start because they're like,
that guy was in another video.
Totally, yeah.
Yeah.
What did, so who's this person?
This is a guy named Sonny V2. He just makes random, you know, about 10-minute videos
about different topics.
And he did one about how Planet Fitness became hated by the world.
That's what it's called
so a bunch of people tagged me they just include a clip of that video it's so fun it's not really
hard to cancel you just have to go in there yeah which was kind of the whole point of my video and
how how easy it was ultimately yeah yeah it's it's people are i mean again i it's it's actually
a great business model to be like we we're fine with you canceling.
Just walk in the door.
Yeah.
And you're still like, no.
Yeah.
I'm not.
That's how lazy you are.
I mean, maybe the hope is even that you come in there, smell a little gym air.
You may get motivated to work out.
Get motivated.
They would have like, yeah.
I don't even talk about it.
They had pizza Fridays or something.
I mean, they're doing stuff that's like, look, we don't even care.
Like, stay. Don't get healthy. Right. We're talk about it. They had pizza Fridays or something. I mean, they're doing stuff that's like, look, we don't even care. Like, stay.
Don't get healthy.
Right.
We're fine with it.
Just come in and cancel, and you just can't do it.
I went to a gym the other day that was not a Planet Fitness,
and I had not been into a gym like that in a long time,
and I was like, whoa, these people are really working out in here.
These people are in shape.
Yeah.
Was that in Phoenix?
Yeah.
Yeah, I think you shared that last episode. Did I? Yeah. These people are in shape. Yeah. Was that in Phoenix? Yeah. Yeah, I think you shared
that last episode.
Did I?
Yeah.
I don't have a...
I don't remember that.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I listened to all your podcasts,
so maybe it was a different one.
Yeah.
You still have multiple podcasts?
Yeah, I have another one
that I have.
Oh, yeah.
You got three or four.
I think it's great.
I know.
Yeah. It's good to have everyone back. It's good.'re all back it is it is good to be back in the game yeah uh let's start with the comments this week uh david brooks
while driving to work this morning i was getting honked at and flashing bright lights on me
i got to my exit and then they pulled up to my side door rolled down the window and just said
hey bear i just gave my hello folks
we both laughed and they made my day pretty sweet all from a nateland podcast sticker on my truck
we're having a good time we're having a good time thanks folks that's fun all right uh did uh you
know i was thinking when you flash lights at uh for a cop like to see if a cop do you flash your
high beams or do you turn them off then on?
What do you mean flash them at a car?
I flash them.
You know, like if you're saying like, hey, there's a cop up here, slow, you're warning to another car.
Okay, yeah.
Like you just flash your high beams, right?
Just do like three times.
Yeah, you don't turn them off then on.
No.
I flash like crazy.
I hate when people, I got a ticket the other day.
I hate it.
What?
Yeah, I flash like crazy what were
you doing just speeding yeah but like on a open road it's wide open it's a four lane it's not
another car in sight yeah how fast were you going uh well pretty fast but but it's also like we're
just nowhere the guy's like why are you in such a hurry? And I'm like, ah, no, man. You're in the middle of nowhere. I'm going downhill.
I'm going down.
Blame gravity.
Yeah. How much hell, though?
What was the speed?
Do you remember?
Well, this is the thing.
It was about 20 over.
Wow.
But I was about to hit a new speed limit zone, so it had only been 10 over.
They caught you on the cusp.
Yeah, they caught
you right on and it changes all the time on this road it's 45 55 45 50 like constant change so you
might as well just go 70 the whole way exactly exactly that is true that could be set up like
that so why do they set it up like that oh those are speed traps that's like a known thing yeah
yeah yeah because they're trying to do that yeah that's crazy but they shouldn't be allowed to do
that that's what well that's all the whole town is funded i'm sure it's not speed
traps it's certain parts that are more dangerous so you slow down toe in the line yeah yeah uh
speed trap sympathizer yeah scab i like the my god didn't believe in gravity he's using gravity
as his argument so well i mean downhill is downhill i didn't say gravity. He's using gravity as his argument. Well, I mean, downhill is downhill. I didn't say gravity.
That's what you should talk to him about.
I think you could get out of stuff.
Yeah.
If you just said, what are your thoughts on gravity?
Typically when I'm alone, I don't get a ticket if I get pulled over.
But when I'm with other people, I almost always get a ticket.
I've been pulled over with you.
Yeah.
You get pulled over a lot.
All the time.
Yeah. Yeah. You get pulled over a lot. All the time. Yeah.
Yeah.
That's unbelievable.
Just a good amount.
You're an aggressive driver.
Yeah, I mean, but...
You got places to go.
Yeah.
People to see.
The big one for us
in growing up,
Old Hickory,
town Lakewood,
is in the middle
of Old Hickory.
It doesn't really make sense.
But they was notorious that everybody knew if you go down there.
I was just talking to my buddy Phillip, and his mom said,
slow down on Old Hickory Boulevard.
Right over the bridge there, right?
When you get over the bridge, I'm talking about going the other way,
but yes, right when you get over the bridge and start coming through Old Hickory,
it would be the cop. because Lakewood had their –
at one point they had their own police department.
So they're only policing like almost to that bridge
to like Hermitage Golf Course.
So, I mean, they're – I got tickets, my brother got –
everybody got tickets because they would –
they didn't really have – there wasn't a ton, ton to do
because it's like this police force that's not having to go that, really that far.
So you would just
notoriously get tickets.
Still has that reputation.
Still, yeah.
I like the idea
of like flashing lights
to let someone know
a cop's there.
There's like something
kind of,
it's like,
it's the camaraderie
among strangers.
It's the last great place
in America
which is just a cross section
of your race,
religion.
The interstate is the last great.
It's beautiful, Aaron.
Angela Wade.
I love how every episode peels back another layer of dust.
So he's got the trailer park backstory, is a member of an HOA,
loves conspiracy theories, listens to Taylor Swift's song,
Shake It Off,
and is a person of faith.
I'm here for all of it.
More, please.
Yeah, I mean,
all those things are great.
I'm not a huge Taylor Swift fan,
but Shake It Off is a fun song.
They all tie in.
Yeah.
These things are all linked.
Of all those, yeah,
Taylor Swift's probably the shakiest one there.
I'll shake it off.
I'll shake it off.
Yeah, it is.
I had to shake it off.
Matt Fisher.
Nate had given up on love but was on the dating app Bumble
looking for a wedding date as a joke.
In her opening line, she asked who my top three favorite comedians were,
and you were the first name we both listed.
We immediately bonded over our favorite Nate bits.
Our first date was a local comedy show, and she was there the following week for my first
open mic.
I quickly realized I couldn't live without this woman, and we've been pretty inseparable
ever since.
Wow.
Wow.
That's awesome.
That is a bold move, bringing a second date to your first open mic.
Oh, yeah.
Because I can guarantee it did not go well
you know yeah yeah pretty sure it didn't go well well it seems unless he brought all his friends
that first one i'd like to know who the other two on the list were yeah it might have gone well but
it wasn't good you know the difference i think that's the difference well that's uh that's
awesome congrats he should share the other two comedians of both of them so we can
judge yeah so we can judge their their pets i was good with just the top one yeah i mean top one
yeah i mean that that obviously well that allegor yeah that right yeah what if it went nate gallagher
um and i don't even know i don't know paula poundstone yes yes people like whoa what happened
here and then she's like oh my gosh that is mine too
yeah i mean then you're like well y'all should get married yeah after we talked about that ranker
thing for favorite or best clean comedian wait that at one time all four of us were at the top
four oh yeah yeah all right we made it uh congrats matt Matt And your lovely lady
Kaylee Lund
Kayla
Kayla
Lund
Kayla
That's a tough one
I go to movie theater
It's just K-A-L-A
But it's hard
Kala
Kala
Could be Kala Lund
I go to movie theaters
Just to get popcorn
They often ask me
For my ticket
I say I'm just here
For popcorn
Dusty I know how much You love popcorn Have you tried this very fun way to elevate a movie at home
wait so you go to the movie theater and just buy popcorn yeah wow that seems intense and expensive
yeah but i think she's going for a vibe and the vibe when she goes home is like you got real
popcorn from home so then you watch the movie at home.
I mean, I do love popcorn, but I pop it in the skillet.
I pop it on a pan at home.
Yeah.
And it puts a little-
I mean, so what if she doesn't believe in microwaves either?
So that's why she doesn't.
Well, I respect it.
Yeah.
I've never tried this, but maybe I will.
I will get into it.
We talked about this before.
My old roommate used to do that.
He'd stop by the movie theater on the way home
and just get a large bucket.
I mean, yeah.
Is that roommate's name Aaron?
Chris Nicholas.
It would be great to have Nate's movie review
as a weekly segment.
I think we're already there. We're already there. I'm trying to think.
We'll watch The Ledge. Well, I just talked about The Ledge
last week. I didn't watch anything last
night.
Did I? No.
No.
Hold on.
Hold on. I'm trying to think.
Did I watch something? This is the segment.
Oh, I started watching the new Scream again.
Okay.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I started watching it.
You're never going to watch Shawshank, huh?
I see it on sometimes, and it's like...
You can't watch it on TV.
You got to watch it on something.
You should watch it, though, just for your own enjoyment.
And you could continue to say you've not seen it, but just for your own.
It would be... This for your own enjoyment. And you could continue to say you've not seen it, but just for your own. It would be, I don't, I.
This is your Planet Fitness.
Yeah.
You know?
It's going to be years.
If we can watch it one day, maybe we'll all watch it.
Okay.
And then, you know, we could.
Critique it?
We could do a breakdown.
And we could all go, ooh, you got to watch this part.
Yeah.
We could do that.
Ooh, watch this part.
They really watch this. Nate, watch this. Yeah we could do that oh yeah watch this part they really
watch this hey watch this yeah yeah there's a chance i'm all it's gonna be the best ever i get
it yeah but i just haven't seen it okay but scream uh luckily i already forgot it so i don't remember
who the killer is i think i do know and so i didn't finish it and i gotta record it i'll
rap do it again tonight uh cat rockwell curious if there's a difference
between dirty and crude in comedy i don't really think so i mean i don't know what those words
really mean i think you're doing one you're probably doing the other yeah i mean i guess
crude could be you're just mean mean-spirited but there are plenty of guys that are you know
cursing because that's how they talk, but they're not talking about anything.
Yeah, yeah.
That's crude.
No comic would just say that someone's a crude comic.
Crude, it would be a word that someone would use to describe comedy.
That's not into comedy.
That's true.
They would be like, I don't like it because I feel like it's very crude.
But a comedian would just say dirty or not dirty.
That'd be it.
Nathan Martin.
My mom was at Kohl's. The craziest. She worked at K Nathan Martin. My mom was at Kohl's.
The Crazier's.
She worked at Kohl's.
My mom worked at Kohl's.
I was just saying, yes.
My mom worked at Kohl's.
It's like you saw the W in work, and you're like, all right, well, we're done with that.
We're done.
We're going to yes.
My mom is currently at Kohl's right now.
She worked there.
The craziest return she ever had was when a guy returned a pair of jeans
because they were dirty, torn, and stretched out.
He wanted to exchange them for a new pair.
They were in that condition because he had worn them for about six years.
My mom's manager told her to do the change because the customer is always right.
He got new pants for free wow this was definitely years ago because that's not how returns are
working these days i try to return some i told you this already but i try to turn some oil to
walmart some cooking oil and they would not let me do it yeah so that was when i knew times had
changed yeah but i think but uh i think target's
still pretty crazy they're pretty good about it oh yeah i think that was more of a you thing maybe
uh i was too nice about it i should have went in yelling i don't know if that was it either but it
was this is you is all you know but you think that the whole package but you would think that
they would be sympathetic and go, you know what?
Let's exchange this oil for this guy.
I think they think you're just trying to scam them.
Like, this guy didn't buy this oil here.
Look at him.
Yeah.
He worked on a car.
Did you get their receipt?
No.
No receipt.
Just walked in with, what was it?
Several gallons of frying oil.
It's probably a hazard.
They were like, you can exchange it for other oil yeah we'll let
you bring this oil back and get different oil yeah yeah i was like i don't even need the money
i just want you know i don't need the oil want to get rid of this oil yeah yeah why did what made
you buy so much oil well i was gonna host thanksgiving oh yeah that's right that's right
i think we're just gonna host thanksgiving yeah now and use the oil. Oh, yeah.
They were looking out for you in the end.
So oil can go that long.
Who knows?
We'll find out.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's going to be an interesting Thanksgiving.
Yeah.
I can't believe they did do that.
Coal's like, how long has coal's been around?
It feels like it's been forever, but I don't remember.
I wasn't a kid.
I don't remember it.
It just popped up, and then it's like that's all anybody talks about now.
Yeah.
Everybody's going to Kohl's.
I feel like it was the 90s kind of when it took off.
Yeah.
Nick Hellman.
Up until my junior year of high school, one of our men's bathroom had two toilets and one stall.
No divider or anything. Those two toilets's bathrooms had two toilets in one stall. No divide or anything.
Those two toilets were also the only toilets in that bathroom.
It was not uncommon to walk into the bathroom and see four feet in the stall.
This was 2017.
Wow.
One of our men's bathrooms had two toilets in one stall.
Golly.
And they would just go in there together.
Someone ripped that stall, the middle thing out.
Well, I mean, yeah, I guess they, you know, you're in. They're just going there together. Someone ripped that stall, the middle thing out.
Well, I mean, yeah, I guess they, you know, you're in.
I mean, even in when I was heavy drinking,
I would not have shared a stall like that.
What are you talking about?
Standing, feet standing?
I mean, that's one thing, but feet sitting.
I think they were standing.
It's like, it's always saying four feet in this thing is they're standing. But I mean, you'd still see the feet. Yeah, they could be sitting. I think they were standing. It's like, it's always saying four feet in this thing is they're standing.
But I mean,
you'd still see the feet.
Yeah, they could be sitting.
No, I know,
but I don't think they're,
but you can see them when they're standing.
So you're,
this argument's kind of going nowhere.
Just to say,
it was just very funny for y'all to say,
well, you can still see them when they're sitting.
You go, I know,
but you can see them when they're standing as well.
But they could be sitting.
It depends.
They could be, but I doubt but I'm just going off like-
Oh, I doubt it.
I doubt it too, yeah.
Okay.
No, I think he's implying they're sitting.
No, no, no, no, no.
There's no way.
Those two tools were the only thing that-
It was not uncommon to walk into the M.C. four feet in the stall.
I don't-
Well, that's not even that weird then.
I mean, that's the same as a urinal.
Well, the stall door is shut, so it is going to be-
You're going to be shocked by it a little bit.
Well, I don't know.
Nick, we need a follow-up.
Yeah, I mean, are they standing at one toilet?
We don't even know what's going on here.
Nick, clear this up for us.
Y'all are reading into it more than it should have been.
Okay.
You know.
So Kohl's opened in 1927 as a grocery store,
and then in 1962, they opened their first department store.
Wow.
So they've been around since the 60s.
They've been around
for a while.
It's now the largest
department store chain
in the U.S.
Good for them.
What do you think
made them switch
from grocery to clothes?
I think, wow,
well the brand name
carries so much weight now.
The amount of oil
that was being returned.
Yeah, yeah.
The likes of yeast.
What do you think
Kroger could just go,
you know what,
we're doing clothes now.
I bet they could. They could. They could. It'd be tough to buy some Kroger could just go, you know what, we're doing clothes now. I bet they could.
They could.
They could.
It'd be tough to buy some Kroger pants.
I've had a few.
Yeah.
Chase Schubert.
The reason people often need to get air in their tires around the same time is because of the change in barometric pressure often overnight.
in barometric pressure often overnight.
So in the atmosphoric, what?
Atmospheric.
All right.
Pressure changes enough overnight,
tire pressure can suddenly drop by 5 or 6 PSI.
So when people get in their cars to go to work,
they suddenly have low-pressure warnings that they didn't have before, and they all converge on the same few air pump stations.
He's saying over in the morning.
I'm not doing this in the morning.
I don't wake up.
I'm not running.
Talk about when I went and got air.
That makes sense, but I'm going at the middle of the day.
I'm not up there.
It's not like a boom.
I'm not in morning traffic usually is what i'm
saying right right but but i'm in my own i'm in my own world of traffic so would the move be to
overfill your tires to account for this change in bearing in uh in pressure probably i say ride it
out to the next season yeah let it fill back up you ever see like because you because you're when
you get on a different sleep cycle
you're around different people
so you see people that are on your sleep cycle
yeah
not that many suits
that I see
you don't see a lot of ties
when I stay at a hotel
if I hit the breakfast I'm there at like
9.30 or something and then sometimes
I'll get up at like 6 or 7 a.m.
And I think I'm going to beat everybody to the breakfast.
Yeah.
And I get down there and that's when everyone is there.
Yeah.
It's amazing.
I'm like, where have these people been?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Well, when you work at a, like I worked at a TV station That has three shifts
Because they're
Did you spell dusty?
I got fire correctly but
Oh I thought you were
Writing a joke down
I am writing a joke down
I'm joking
I just thought
When I worked at a TV station
That has three shifts
I mean you wouldn't
If you worked
You would always see one shift but you wouldn't
because they would come in there were some overlap yeah but whenever i would change shifts because i
worked overnights i worked mornings or days and i worked nights you would work all of a sudden
people had been there for years that you'd never known and all of a sudden you're you got a whole
new group of co-workers whole new group of friends. A different world. Yeah.
Alex Mowat.
Mowat.
The we, they thing, when talking about sports, actually, has been named.
I'm not sure of the academic acceptance of it, but I learned from Professor Berg and Korf.
Berg slash Berging.
Oh, maybe Berge.
Berge and slash Berging is basking in relatively glory.
Reflective.
Reflective. Basking in reflective glory. We kicked their butt. And Korf slash korfing is cutting off reflective failure. They couldn't get it together today. I'd rather not watch sports.
Yeah, I have no idea what this is talking about.
So those are acronyms he's saying.
Yeah. So basically, we've had debates about, can you call it we when you're talking about
your team or whatever? In fact, the Kevin Nealon episode, we talked about that a little bit.
But he's saying there's an actual term uh scientific term i
guess berg is when you and i do this when vanderbilt is doing great i'm like man we are having a great
and then when they start doing bad which is most of the time i'll be like these guys just they're
terrible yeah oh okay they could yeah you say we when we're doing well you say we we. When the team's doing well, and then they bad, you say they.
I feel like this could have been done without Berg or Korf.
Yeah.
This could have been explained without that.
Well, that's the whole point of the message is that there's a term for it.
They go, oh, you're Berging right now.
Is that what you would say to someone?
They go, we won today.
And they go, well, don't quit being a Berger.
Yeah.
And then you're like, well, they lost.
And you're like, all right, now you're a core.
Now you're core for me.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I don't know.
I don't support it.
I got this jacket on.
This is John Augustine gave it to me.
It's a Vanderbilt.
It's like a captain's jacket or something.
Or no, it's something.
It's special.
Anchors up.
Anchors up. He told me what it means, and I'm blanking on it right now. But's something it's special anchors up anchors up he told me what
it uh means and i'm blanking on it right now but i know it means a lot to him okay and i own it now
that's cool yeah so there's not it's a one-on-one they don't really you don't can't go get this
that's the point of it uh no one made it for me and i have uh john's body type
now you're basking
in his reflected glory.
I'm basking
in his reflected glory.
Yeah.
Relative.
Yes, we did do very good.
Yeah.
They're struggling now though,
but that's how you would say it.
Mary Linda Thu
is laughing at your own jokes
while performing
a normal thing
that just happens
or if it's more commonly
a stalling technique.
My husband and Saul, a well-known comedian, perform,
and during the show he laughed hysterically at his own joke
maybe two or three times.
It really threw me off.
Have some ideas of who you saw?
I don't want to dive in the weeds of it, but I'm not a fan.
I don't know.
I laugh at my own jokes sometimes, but not hysterically.
No, no. Yeah, you can look. I'll have little moments of laughter. fan uh i don't know i laugh at my own jokes sometimes but not hysterically no no yeah you
can look i i'll have little like like little moments of laughter i'm kind of laughing at
how good the joke is doing like you like you laugh at like you can get kind of surprised by like
man that guy's laughing hard and you kind of laugh and you you're you're just enjoying it
i'm doing the opposite yeah i'm laughing at how badly the joke yeah i'll throw a laugh in there yeah
so you could have little stuff but when when the comic does it where it's hysterically and
they can't get through the joke like if they're slapping the microphone on the knee that's too
much yeah well it's like yeah if they can't it's there's no way you just tell these jokes every
day i've i've i've laughed i've never been enough where I can't get through a joke.
That's insane.
I don't even.
I would go as far as to say it's impossible.
There's no way.
I broke out into some laughs on some riffs before.
Something that I had never said before.
And I was even amazed that those words came out of my mouth.
I was like, oh, that is funny.
And I don't know where it came from.
Because you were a vessel.
You're genuinely laughing.
Yes.
And so some comics can do it.
And it's kind of a performance kind of thing,
where they're doing it to be like, I can't get to, you know.
But they can get through the joke.
They told the joke every night.
If you go watch them, go watch them multiple.
They do it every show.
So you tell me every night, you're like, you go through the whole tour, and you're like, go watch them multiple they do it every show so you tell me every night you're like you go through the whole tour and you're like you know
i never made it through that one joke i just that could not get it it's such a funny idea that i
never could get but yeah if you laugh you can be caught off guard i can like i can laugh i can hear
someone laughing and they're laughing super hard and that that makes me laugh. It's the sound of joy that you're like, man.
And then, yeah, or if you say something kind of funny,
you riff it, and then you kind of laugh.
But it's a very genuine kind of laugh, but yeah,
not being able to get through it.
Actors say it's harder to fake laugh than fake cry.
To really fake laugh well.
Like Steve Carell does it great in The Office.
Everyone says, like that that is such a
skill nobody talks about julia louis-dreyfus is great at it oh yeah yeah man she is uh
taylor driver at the end of our group therapy session oh boy uh no i'm joking
better help at the end at the end of our group therapy session, we went around the room to say something we were
lurking forward to.
The lady next to me said she was looking forward to seeing Nate Bargetze.
I said, in December?
She nodded her head and asked, are you going to?
I'll be there.
I replied.
Unfortunately, we didn't talk about it more afterwards because everyone there has problems
with anxiety, but comedy still brought us together in a way.
That's nice.
Yeah. That's awesome. Yeah, that's awesome.
Come on out.
That's y'all going.
I'll be there.
That's great.
You know, I don't think y'all were ready.
I mean, how much more y'all would have talked about it?
Right.
Yeah, you kind of did it.
I mean, yeah, y'all could go.
Maybe I'll see that you did exactly what it was.
Organize a ride together.
That's good.
Do you want to do that?
I'm anxious here just
hearing about that like you go you're not gonna but i mean i think they did it you know yeah all
right you're gonna be there all right there we go we talked about this yesterday as you get older
you just start you just stop caring about you know the small talk stuff like that what would
they have talked about where are you gonna park yeah yeah yeah i'm gonna get popcorn i think yeah
um i'll get mine at the movie theater i find the
older i get the more i'm into small talk like let's don't go deeper than that but let's let's
small talk it driving around the country dusty the amount of times you get shut down by strangers
trying to small talk of is is astronomical oh yeah yeah just every gas station hey how y'all
doing today fine oh they shut you down.
Oh, yeah.
All the time.
Yeah.
I love it though.
Yeah.
It's one of my favorite things.
Yeah.
All right.
All right, guys.
Are you wasting money?
Just like that.
Yeah.
Just like that.
Just like that.
That was perfect.
Are you wasting money on subscriptions?
80% of people have subscriptions they forget about.
I've got one.
I've been paying, I think, $23, $29 a month for Adobe
because over a year ago, Aaron gave me some lessons.
I've never once done it.
I don't know how to do it.
It was over my head, but I'm still paying for it
because I keep waiting to go back over Aaron's house
and have him show me how to do it again.
But anyway, I don't have to do that, guys.
There's an easy way for me to cancel the subscription.
Most Americans think they spend around $80 a month on subscriptions.
You know how much they actually spend?
No.
More?
$200.
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$200 plus.
That's right.
You could be wasting hundreds of dollars each month on subscriptions.
You don't even.
$200 a month?
That's crazy.
According to this.
Wow.
According to Rocket Money.
That's the app I love using, guys.
It takes care of me when I'm out there.
It's called Rocket Money, formerly known as Truebill.
The app shows all your subscriptions in one place
and cancels what you don't want for you.
Rocket Money can even find subscriptions
you didn't know you were paying for.
You may even find out that you've been double charged
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That's happened to me before.
I got a subscription I'm eyeing right now.
It's about to be at renewal,
and I'm really thinking over it.
You want to share?
No.
All right.
Cancel unnecessary subscriptions with rocket
money today go to rocket money.com slash nate seriously guys it could save you hundreds per
year that's rocket money.com slash nate that was beautiful that's fun yeah all right this week
well can i share something about? All right. No, please.
Yeah.
Do we have time?
Yeah.
So this shirt's Soldier's Child Foundation.
Nice.
So every year for the last four years, I've played in this.
Reno Collier, who's a very funny comedian.
We all know him.
He opened for many years for Larry the Cable Guy.
He always calls.
Very funny. Yeah. he always calls funny yeah
he always calls and says we need celebrity golfers to play in this thing and every year the same
thing happens i get out there and the group is so disappointed because obviously no one knows who i
am every year i'm not even the most interesting guy in our group there's always someone has
something there's a guy who sold ads for the newspaper who they were more interested in me so then they think well you
must be a good golfer then and then i t it off and i hit it 50 yards to the women's tees and
they're like oh for two you think they think that though i just think why is he out here then if he
if he doesn't if no one knows who you are? And when you Google me, because they said they Googled me,
it comes up I'm a musician.
So they thought I sang.
I think you just got to come in hotter than that.
You got to come in with some attitude.
Can you imagine just him singing and you got to go –
you go watch him do comedy, but now you got to go watch him with a guitar
and he sings.
You're like, good.
Country crooner, Brian Bates.
He walks out.
And then they think, well, because it's always a bunch of great guys drunk, you know, just want to have a good time.
They're like, well, that's okay.
We'll just have some beer and have some fun.
You ready for a cold one?
I'm like, well, I don't really drink.
And they're like, oh, God, this guy.
So to make it matters worse, this year I'm out there.
And I have allergies.
They're like, oh, my goodness.
So they're like, what is this guy?
To make it even worse, the group in front of me,
their celebrity, Larry the Cable Guy.
So I've never met Larry the Cable Guy.
I see him standing there waiting to tee off.
Very unassuming.
No one's bothering him.
He's got his hat down.
He's got his sunglasses on.
So I go over to him, and he could not have been nicer.
He was just incredibly nice.
And just, I'm like, I'm a big fan of yours.
I mean, just so super nice.
Could have been nicer.
And as often the case with any celebrity comedian I make, I quickly name drop Nate.
And I'm about to say, you know, Nate and I were just talking on the podcast about how he says you're a good golfer.
And I say, Nate and I were talking on the podcast.
And before I can even say any more, he said, man, I'm a big fan of Nate's.
I'd love to meet him sometime.
And I'm like, oh, you've never met him?
And he's like, no, I'd love to.
I was like, you should be on the podcast? And he's like, no, I'd love to. I was like, well, you should be on the podcast.
And he's like, I love that.
He said, let's exchange phone numbers, you know, to make it happen.
So we keep talking about stuff.
And then I said, you've never met Nate?
And he goes, no.
And then somewhere along the way it kind of hits me.
I don't think this is Larry the Cable Guy.
I have no idea who this is.
And now there's some fan that I've offered up Nate's home.
So now I'm trying to figure out who this is.
But to be cool about it.
So I'm like, where'd you come in from?
Because I know Larry the Cable Guy lives in Nebraska.
And he's like, I just came in from Ohio.
But I'm thinking he could have had a show there last night.
So then I said, what you got coming up next?
Because that's a common comedy thing.
He said, I'm going to the studio tomorrow.
So now I'm thinking, okay, it is somebody.
I still think it may be Larry the Cable Guy.
I'm not sure.
So we keep talking.
And then finally it's time to tee off so we separate.
I immediately called Nate.
I was like, hey hey you know larry the
cable guy right he's like oh yeah i was like well i just told a stranger that uh you know and nate
was like you couldn't recognize one of the most recognizable faces in all of entertainment and i
was like apparently not where he's cut off sleeves yeah so the whole time out there the rest of the
day i now avoid this guy because I'm like,
I don't even know who I'm talking to, but we're supposed to exchange numbers and set
this up.
It could still be Larry the Cable Guy.
So I just avoid him the rest of the day and I never see him again and I get out of there.
And then when I got home, I texted Reno Collier and said, hey, who was the celebrity in the
group in front of us?
And it was Cletus T. Judd.
Oh, yeah.
Who I've worked with many times and act like we're old friends because we are.
Yeah.
We know each other very well, but somehow I got him confused.
I must be the most racist guy in America.
I can't tell two white guys apart.
So the bottom line is Cleese T. Jack could not have been nicer.
I mean, he is a great guy, and he's probably coming on the podcast someday.
I'm a fan of him, too.
I like him, too.
Yeah.
Yeah, when I was a kid, he had that If Shania Was Mine song.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That was a big hit.
Yeah, I mean, he's a great guy.
Yeah, he's great.
But somehow I thought it was Larry the Cable Guy. Yeah, I'm a big hit. Yeah. I mean, he's a great guy. He's great. But somehow I thought it was Larry the Cable Guy.
Yeah.
I'm a big fan of Cleetus.
That's awesome.
That makes it. That's so funny.
Brian Bates, musical artist.
I'm a big fan of you.
I can see.
He was texting me during this.
And I was like, I just hope it's not.
Oh, you're talking about me?
Yeah.
Yeah, I was texting.
Yeah.
But we also talked out there.
Because I immediately went back to my golf cart and Googled Larry the Cable Guy Ohio,
hoping to find that he was there last night.
But I couldn't find anything.
Brian Bates, musical artist.
What do you got?
What's your music?
Yeah, what's the songs?
I don't know.
I was just sent the screenshot.
Well, there was one right there.
Oh, that's a screenshot.
Oh, okay.
It's not.
That's an author. You were sent the screenshot? Mm-hmm. Yeah. there. Oh, that's a screenshot. Oh, okay. It's not. That's an author.
You were sent the screenshot?
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Tristan Ayer dropped that to me.
Oh, wow.
All right.
Aaronland doing some work.
Behind the scenes.
Behind the scenes.
You have an assistant for the computer.
That's right.
That's right.
It's too much, though.
You got busy.
Yeah.
All right.
So, speaking of Cleary's T. Judge, this week we'll talk about superheroes.
You're a superhero. Yeah. All right. So speaking of Cleetus D. Judge, this week we'll talk about superheroes. You're a superhero.
Yeah.
So the number one movie right now at the box office is Black Adam from The Rock.
Okay.
The number one.
And then.
He's working.
Yep.
He found some work.
A bit of a drought for him.
Yep.
Yeah.
And then this weekend, Black Panther Wakanda Forever comes out.
So superhero movies, they're starting to take off a little bit.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, The Rock is like, you almost think,
you're like, is he all we got for entertainment?
He's got a TV show now.
It's just basically, I guess we just do The Rock over and over again.
Yeah.
And we have him do other things.
That's if someone.
A lot of rocks.
A lot of, we do a lot of The Rock.
I'll tell you that.
That's what we do The Rock the most.
You know, if someone flew down, an alien's came, they go, what do y'all watch?
We go, we watch The Rock.
Yeah.
We only watch The Rock and we watch him do different things.
He does all the remakes.
He does all the remakes.
You're like, who is it?
He goes, It's The Rock. It it's one guy we make him do everything a lot of people say that if we had to pick one
person to represent the world to aliens they'd pick the rock i don't know if i'm in that crew
it is funny to think that that would people say that that it's a wrestler yeah you know he started
off the only real successful transition from wrestling to movies, and now he's like the most successful.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
I'd send Stone Cold Steve Austin for us in The Rock.
He'd stun them?
Yeah.
Yeah, you don't want The Rock up there.
You go, they would take him.
He'd be in their movie.
You want Stone Cold to bust in there and give him the stunner and just cause chaos.
Well, he would trick them into drinking a beer, and then right when they turned, he'd stun them.
This guy's a good guy.
Glass break.
I don't know who you would send to represent.
It's definitely not The Rock.
But he's charming.
Yeah, but he's just a movie star in every movie.
I don't think he
if you gotta think that's going to represent that's i mean that's our giant man like he's
that does not that's not a representation yeah you go so all of you are like this you're like
yeah we're i mean maybe if you want to fake them out to be like make them rethink coming down
then i mean send the rock and then go this is what y'all do because i'm one of the smaller
ones right you almost want to send paul giamatti something like that yeah to be like oh it gets
better from here he comes yeah he got uh i just said he comes from a ton of money paul giamatti
yeah i just someone just told me that i don't know i don't know if that's true makes sense yeah
it's uh i i want to say like it's to say, because we were talking about actors that come from money.
Yeah, I don't doubt that at all.
Yeah.
Yeah, it seemed like it.
Because they really tricked us into the Paul Giamatti thing with the movie Sideways.
Remember when that came out and everybody was like, wanted to drink wine.
Even I got into a little wine after that.
Yeah.
I would do a couple
glasses of wine and switch to liquor it's always a good choice i'm trying to i'm just thinking about
who to send to represent america uh if you want to go like this kind of wraps it up that's a kid rock
you got we got rap music, country, a little bit of everything. Here you go.
You know.
Yeah, like Kid Rocky's like rich, but he also, I think,
kind of like lives in a trailer.
Somebody says he has a trailer with like an underground bunker.
That's my dream.
Paul Giamatti's dad was the president of Yale and also the commissioner of Major League Baseball.
Yes, that's it.
Wow.
Oh, yeah, Bart Giamatti.
Yeah.
I never put that together. Wow., yeah. Bart Giamatti. Yeah. I never put that together.
Wow.
Angelo Bartlett Giamatti.
Arthur Smith, the head coach of the Atlanta Falcons,
dad has started FedEx.
And Home Depot, I think.
Now, that's Arthur Blank, the owner of the Falcons.
But the head coach of the Falcons is a billionaire just from his dad.
A lot of authors out here.
Wow.
Yeah.
Good for him.
I was trying to think if you would send-
I think about you. You're the greatest average American. That's true. Good for him. I'm trying to think if you would send- I think about you.
You're the greatest average American.
That's true.
I should go.
I'll talk to him.
But not a celebrity.
Yeah.
Come on now.
I'll support it.
Yeah.
Don't send me.
I'll be like, I don't believe that you're from another planet.
Yeah.
They go, we already got you up here.
You're who they've been abducting for years, a bunch of yous.
I'll go up talking about Jesus.
You know what I mean?
You got to get out of here.
But who would you, I don't know if you, would you send,
you'd probably send a historian or something,
like someone that could tell you about everything.
But if it is like you want them to represent,
to be like this represents America, I don't think it's the right.
What are they being sent to do?
To negotiate peace talks? No, I think it's like just being like, this represents America. I don't think it's the wrong thing. What are they being sent to do? To negotiate peace talks?
No, I think it's just being like,
if it's probably a time capsule.
If you had to send a time capsule of something
and you're like, we want to send this.
They would say it's Seinfeld.
The TV show would be like, watch that.
That was like the 90s or something.
But if you had to send, say, a person in the time capsule
to be like, we're basically all this.
I think David Spade.
David Spade dressed as Joe Dirt.
That's who you send.
But not everybody's like that.
So you gotta get some, but Spade could do both.
Yes. Yeah. Spade could
do both.
Meryl Streep.
What's your reason behind your reason you gotta have some
well she's played
every role
okay
that's true
you just don't want
to play it
I didn't say
you just threw it
out there
and didn't give us
any info
yeah
I don't know
I was yeah
but you know
I would think
they're gonna make
fun of the South
she'll go
and then we have
these other people
god why did we send that and the aliens are like yeah we know about that yeah yeah I would think they're going to make fun of the South. She'll go, and then we have these other people.
God, why did we send them? And the aliens are like, yeah, we know about that.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
They're the ones that see us all the time.
You can't get by them.
Maybe that's why it's this.
Southern people are crushing it because we don't let you buy the UFOs.
You get it together.
What do you mean don't let them buy?
We see them.
We see them all. And we're not afraid to talk about it yeah yeah that's true yeah and everybody else thinks
they see something but they're embarrassed that's true they're outside more often too probably yeah
yeah they're good eyes like good raccoon eyes raccoons have good eyes? I bet so. I bet they do. Yeah. What about Jimmy Carter?
He shakes everybody's hand.
Jimmy Carter now?
Jimmy Carter now?
He's 98, but he's a good humanitarian effort.
He's that old now, though.
98.
Don't people didn't like him as president, though, right?
Yeah.
He would die up there, and the aliens are like, he died on his own.
We didn't do that
we did not yeah yeah the travel alone he was old when you sent him up here okay yeah
because is this y'all's baby y'all's baby version is like this because no that's the end yeah yeah
that's the end of it jimmy saw a UFO. Did he? Yeah.
And he did admit it until way later in life, right?
Maybe.
I think he was like governor or something when he saw it or running for.
This is like in the 70s.
Yeah, that's when his presidency started to, once he admitted he'd seen it. Oh, really?
Yeah, they started trying to take him down.
I don't know.
Oh, no.
Doesn't that sound like something?
It sounds like it.
Yeah.
Can't be having this UFO stuff. Right? Yeah. I don't know. Doesn't that sound like something? It sounds like it. Yeah. Can't be having this UFO stuff.
Right.
Yeah.
All right.
I don't know.
I'll see.
If they think someone.
Who would?
But I can't.
Like, who represents just.
It's got to be a mix of everything.
Got to be a mix of everything.
Can we assume.
This will make things way easier.
Can we assume that they have some kind of technology where language is not an issue?
There's no language barrier.
No, no.
So we can have conversations.
You want just, if you got to think, California to New York to the South to Montana to Dakotas,
like who do you send?
So just America though.
Just America.
Who do you send that is like kind of like everybody would be like, we're fine with that.
Everybody's got to agree.
Man.
So, I mean, I understand the rock on likability,
so maybe we could all agree that we're okay because everybody likes the rock.
Yeah.
So I understand that.
Tom Cruise.
But for a country that is –
I said Tom Cruise.
He's Scientologist.
He's probably done it.
He's already talking to aliens.
Yeah, yeah, that's a good thing.
Well, like we're the most overweight country, right? So you can't – No, Mexico beat us. Did they beat us? aliens. Yeah, yeah. That's a good thing. Well, we're the most overweight country, right?
So you can't-
No, Mexico beat us.
Did they beat us?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
We're back and forth with Mexico.
Right, right, right.
It's a battle of the jugrats.
Yeah, yeah.
So it's tough to send possibly the most in shape guy.
Is it because they're coming over the border?
The skinny ones can make it over the border?
I'm sorry.
I thought that joke was probably too mean,
but it was,
that's what I thought.
Just go there.
They're literally getting fatter just because they're,
they're the ones that can't get over.
The ones trying to climb the wall.
They try to climb the wall and they go,
I can't do it.
They're losing their skinny people.
Just,
I mean,
rapidly.
I don't,
I don't know if people get mad about that one.
I think it's the corn.
That was funny.
It's the corn. We love corn. We love corn. Corn. Yeah. that one. I think it's the corn. That was funny. It's the corn.
We love corn.
We love corn.
Corn.
Yeah.
Both sides.
You think it's the corn.
It's the corn.
That makes us fat.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, we're eating corn syrup.
High fructose, nonetheless.
Tom Hanks.
Tom Hanks would be all right.
That's a good one.
I don't like him that much.
I don't either. All right. It'sanks would be all right. That's a good one. I don't like him that much. I don't either.
All right.
It's going to be tough.
Okay.
Joe Rogan.
Yeah.
He's not polarizing at all.
No, no.
Let's unite the country.
Yeah, yeah.
But it would be...
I mean, a lot of people listen to him.
Oh, yeah.
And then he's like...
He was a host on...
He lived in Hollywood.
He would know all this stuff.
Good at having conversations with people.
Good at having conversations. Yeah. Good at having conversations.
Yeah.
Already believed way in on it.
Right.
I don't know.
Me.
Yeah.
Okay.
I'd take him.
Yeah.
Bozo the Clown.
Mickey Mouse.
Ronald McDonald.
Yeah.
Do you know Bozo the Clown?
It's a name I've heard.
I know that it's a clown, but I'm not familiar what it's from.
I can't visualize it in my head.
Is it just like a clown?
Is it from a movie?
Yeah. Bozo, it's
the number one clown. Bozo the clown.
I don't know if he's bigger than Ronald
McDonald.
Ronald McDonald's out there
selling merchandise.
Bozo was like, I'm a clown, dude.
I have my own show. He had his own show.
You know those little buckets
that you throw a ball
and it like bounces?
Wasn't that Bozo?
I think so.
Bozo seems completely insane, though.
Part of that is from Seinfeld
where George Casanza argued
John Favreau was a clown
and he'd never heard of Bozo the Clown.
Yeah, yeah.
Oh.
Yeah.
I definitely recognize Bozo the Clown.
This is the quintessential clown look. About Krusty the Clown. Mm-hmm. Krusty the Clown. This is the quintessential clown look.
About Krusty the Clown.
Mm-hmm.
Krusty the Clown, right?
From the Simpsons.
Simpsons, yeah, that's...
Bozo came to Lebanon in 19...
Probably 78.
And my mom took...
That was a big day, man.
My mom took my sister and I to see him.
That was a big day.
That's Lebanon for you. Yeah. And Channel 2 News I to see it. That's a big day. That's loving it for you.
Yeah.
And Channel 2 News came and filmed it.
And at Vacation Bible School, my teacher said,
I saw you on the news, and I mean, it made my year.
Oh, yeah.
Several years, probably.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Still has.
The only TV credit I have, so.
Was that like when Bo was, that was in the paper, that was. Oh, it was a big deal. It was a big deal. Yeah. Man. I have. Was that like when Bo was there? That was in the paper. That was...
Oh, it was a big deal.
It was a big deal.
Yeah.
Man.
My mom took me down there.
You got a picture of it?
Maybe somewhere.
Yeah.
I'd love to see it.
It's not clear.
I'll tell you that.
It's pretty blurry.
Black and white.
It was right when they switched the color.
Oh, okay.
Man, yeah.
No, that's probably not true.
They had color in the 60s.
Yeah.
They're not clear, I'll tell you that.
Yeah.
So what do you guys, what would you say is the most popular superhero in the world?
Superman.
Superman.
Maybe Spider-Man, but I think Superman.
I would have said Superman.
Spider-Man, according to a recent poll.
Who's asking these polls?
I know.
Actually, I think this was Google search.
Oh, Batman possibly too.
Spider-Man was one, Batman two, Superman three.
Superman's getting a bad rap.
It's like they keep trying to make those movies,
and I like Superman.
Why do people not, it's because he's too powerful.
This is what I feel like they need to do.
They need to make more Superman movies where Superman is like just rescuing people.
Yeah.
Quit having him fight crazy, just let him rescue people.
Well, the older Superman movies were great.
You're talking about the Christopher Reeve?
Yeah.
Yeah.
So, yeah.
So, originally Superman, well, originally Superman was a villain.
The guys who created him was a villain, like a mad scientist.
And then that quickly, they're like, you know what?
Let's make him a good guy from another planet.
And then they sold it to.
You know what?
Let's change everything.
Yeah, exactly.
These guys are right out of high school.
He flies too now.
Yeah.
All right.
Grew up on a farm.
Don't get ahead.
That sounds like scientist.
So.
They're like, no, we didn't do this.
They sold it for $130
to DC Comics
for the right to this.
Man.
It's worth more than that now?
A little bit.
A little bit.
They sued later on
to get more money.
Of course.
So Superman at first
could not fly.
It's a bird.
It's a plane.
It's Superman.
Up on Scott.
Faster than a speeding bullet.
More powerful locomotive. Able to leap tall buildings single bound. Yeah. It's a plane. It's Superman. Up up sky. Faster than a speeding bullet. More powerful locomotive.
Able to leap tall buildings single bound.
Yeah.
He couldn't fly.
He could just jump really high.
Okay.
And then this other competing comic book came along, and they had Captain Marvel.
Not the Captain Marvel.
There's a Captain Marvel now.
This is a different Captain Marvel.
And he could fly.
And then people started reading those comic books, and they're like, this guy's even more
powerful than Superman. So then DC were like, well we're gonna make superman fly so this kept going
for a while and then it got to the point where superman was so powerful that people lost interest
because it's like what's the point he can do anything he could you know destroy planets with
a punch he could yeah it was just so ridiculous and then comic book started to wane in like the 50s
and 60s because like nobody cares uh batman became more popular because he was a little bit more
identifiable i guess in a way and then um marvel came along the 60s and stan lee started creating
characters that were more for adults not just for kids and that's when spider-man came along in the 60s, and Stan Lee started creating characters that were more for adults, not just for kids.
And that's when Spider-Man came along, and, you know,
like real people, just something happened to them,
and now they've got to deal with all these powers and stuff like that.
And then the movies, yeah, Superman, Christopher Reeve in the 70s,
then they made it, that's when they were like a hit,
and it kind of took off again.
Yeah, those were great.
Not great now, but they were great back then but to your point the recent ones they've gotten so dark that there's no rescuing somebody from a tree or yeah or anything it's just let's
get as dark as we can immediately that's why like an origin story with superman is always good
because you see him like growing up rescuing people, fighting, beating up bullies.
That kind of stuff's always fun.
Well, I always thought, why didn't he play football?
Yeah.
I mean, I think about that, actually, probably pretty often.
I think in the Christopher Reeve one, there's one scene with football.
Yeah, yeah.
He kicks a football.
Yeah.
And it keeps him.
But it's like, I know he couldn't, but I think about it all the time.
I'm like, can you imagine if he would have played?
Like, it's just.
In the show Smallville, where it's about his teenage years,
he plays on the football team.
Oh.
But he makes an agreement with his parents, if I remember correctly.
Maybe it's just with himself.
He's like, I'm not going to use my powers on the football field
because I'll just.
Yeah, what's the point?
Yeah.
What am I even doing here?
Yeah.
One episode, he gets the ball,
he runs like 50 miles away,
saves somebody,
and runs back so quick
that they don't even recognize
he's been gone in the play
and then scores a touchdown.
Oh, wow.
So that's why he can just do whatever he wants.
Was he All-State?
I'm sure he was pretty good.
I mean, Kansas, come on.
There's not that many new players.
How do you play and try to play hard but not use your powers?
Where do you draw the line?
Yeah.
Where you're like, I'm only going to be regular strong.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You got to have a switch and you turn it off.
It's got to be modes.
Yeah.
It's like you got to just be – it's like probably jogging and running
and sprinting.
You just kind of go like, I'll just jog.
And then you're like, oh, got tackled.
Say you're the running back and you're on the goal line
and you're like, oh, I know that I could get it in,
but I'm just going to go light at it.
Yeah, would he get tackled?
I don't even know.
I don't know.
I only remember one scene in my head of him just doing whatever he wanted.
I think he gets to play, but all the other team has kryptonite.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm going to try to find a clip of him playing football.
Yeah.
You'll like this, Dusty.
It's a little Adam Sandler thing going here.
All Superman's love interests are LL.
Oh.
There's Lois Lane, of course.
But then on Smallville, there was Lana Lang, Sasko's sweetheart.
Loris Lamaris.
And then Lex Luthor is, of course, his enemy.
His enemy, yeah.
Has your wife become driven to me?
Yeah.
Yeah, he dated Lex and then things changed.
No, I'm just saying that's why it's all LLs.
No matter what, even in marriage,
your spouse becomes driven. Yeah, yeah.
Everyone who's played Superman,
at least up until recently,
something really bad's happened to them.
Oh.
George Reeve,
who played it on the TV show,
he committed suicide.
Christopher Reeve, of course,
was paralyzed and died.
Some other people had...
Dean Cain,
just people started not liking him.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
I feel like that would happen to Dean Cain.
That show did good, too.
It did, yeah.
That was, what is it?
Lois and Clark.
Lois and Clark, yeah.
Terry Hatcher.
Yeah.
Yeah.
A comedian told me he went up to Dean Cain
at an event to meet him,
and Dean Cain was like,
are you buying something?
And he was like, no.
And he goes, all right, move on.
I respect that.
Yeah, me too.
Superman briefly had a mullet.
Oh, Joe Dirt.
Yep.
So we talked about it in a previous episode.
He died in a battle with Doomsday.
And then, of course, they brought him back.
When he came back, he had a mullet.
Yeah.
What happened to the first Superman you said?
That what? Like in real life, what happened to him? Yeahman you said that what like in real life what happened to
him yeah he committed suicide oh yeah yeah he apparently could fly but my dad would always
talk about that like how superman now just takes off from the ground but the old superman had to
run yeah do a running start i had to kind of get going yeah now superman just you just see him run
he's like bouncing like that.
Like the first airplane taking off.
He's like, I almost got it.
Well, they...
Yes.
That's the problem with all these superheroes.
Was it Lewis and...
Oh, they were explorers.
They were explorers.
Not the airplane people.
The Hulk, same thing happened.
The Wright brothers.
Yeah.
The Hulk, they just kept making him stronger and stronger and stronger to the point
where no one cared because it was ridiculous there was world breaker hulk where he would just take a
step and the earth would crack in half and stuff like that and people are like what's the point
it became so ridiculous that it wasn't even fun that's what i think are great about the marvel movies they they all like they all have a weakness
of some sort yeah uh i saw like uh matthew mcconnelly on instagram and like posted about
who he liked superheroes and i just don't really read it and he said the hulk but like with him
everything he says it's like a whole thing oh yeah it just it like goes he's like i like the
hulk it goes because i mean i didn't even watch it i only saw two seconds like i can't i can't The whole thing. Oh, yeah, yeah. It goes, he's like, I like the Hulk.
He goes, because, I mean, I didn't even watch it.
I only saw two seconds.
I can't.
I can't.
This can't be some message.
Yeah, it's all philosopher McConaughey now. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Was there a message?
And I like him.
He could be someone you send.
That could actually be.
He can weird them out, dude.
Yeah.
He can kind of get them on their toes.
Like, what is this guy?
But he's almost almost he could be he
could he could be one that could be sent because i mean he's you know he is from the south he i
feel like he's he could he can somewhat talk to both sides you know like uh yeah but yeah he does
his history he's like he's i like told he goes because when i it's like all this big thought
out and you want to just be like oh my gosh gosh, I just want to, I should have never said anything to you.
Like I should have, do you want rice?
That's what I meant to ask.
What do you want to eat?
It might've been in his story.
Did you ever see his video, his first ever video on Instagram, like where he's introducing himself to this dude?
He's like, I'm looking forward to this, man.
He's like, I'm looking forward to seeing if Who I Am translates.
Yeah.
Seeing if I tickle your funny bone, make you think.
Yeah. And I'm like, what is going on?
Yeah.
Yeah.
But I bet if you meet him, I mean, it's the best.
I'm sure he's great.
I think it's got to be the best.
He's a guy, though, that if he's not attractive, everything he says is creepy.
Yeah.
That's a good point.
It's like too much. Yeah. Like he he's like i want to see if what i'm
saying tickles your funny bone if he's a yeah a weird looking dude you're like all right
see it if who i am translates i think i'm trying to shut down instagram let's say that
like yeah or not shut it down but i need to to just. You talked about it. I talked about it.
On the podcast?
No, off camera.
No, off, yeah.
Off the record.
I'll bring it on the record.
I'm trying to, it's, because I think it makes you think, like I said, I'm trying to create
a new act, and it makes you think, like, kind of short.
Yeah.
Like, you're, it's very quick.
You think quick.
You're looking for jokes.
Like, you just think of, like, this is a funny, quick thing. Like, it's not quick you think quick you're looking for jokes like you just think of like uh this is a funny quick thing like it's not like an act and your mind is like just kind of like
just like kind of devouring that kind of stuff oh oh you mean yeah just watching it watching
yeah yeah just watching it like i think it's like get me into like you think everything
thinks quick so then i'm like well i need to like not be on it because uh at least until you know
my special comes out especially if you try to like cater all your material for instagram if you're
trying for instagram material which i think a lot of people are now i mean who doesn't want you know
everybody wants their hits but yeah but i like i'm not trying to make it for instagram but but
when you're watching all you're watching is stuff that's made for instagram you then you start thinking like that yeah one minute and it's like yeah and i don't
want to think like like right now i'm like i can't be thinking like this and i'm that's that's the
problem so dusty you more of a marvel guy or dc i'm marvel all the way i mean i'm pretty bored uh with all superhero stuff because it's
like i mean 10 years ago or more when it started coming out it was so exciting yeah now it's like
i mean it's all the movies i've been 20 years ago yeah i mean it's all the movies now i mean
when end game ended i was like all right this is where i'm done and then i'm like i'll watch some
here and there on a plane or something,
but I'm really done keeping up with the story.
You were a big superhero fan.
Yeah, I love those.
I mean, I had a bunch of comic books as a kid.
I still got a bunch of comic cards.
I should have brought the cards.
I got so many cards.
They're so fun.
Good you didn't bring them.
Yeah.
Or good you didn't bring them.
I mean, they would be great.
Yeah.
It would have been nice for the superhero episode, but yeah i mean they're great they're great i have
three good collections of superhero cards full collection that's so great i'm sure we do another
something attached to superheroes and i'll bring them yeah and you bring them then i'll bring them
then yeah um but the um i loved it i just so I'm not, I've never been a huge reader, right?
So I didn't really read the comic books.
Quotes.
You did quotes around reading.
Yeah.
So people, people that are quote listening.
Yeah.
So I would watch them.
So now I would look at them.
I would look at the books.
Punisher was my favorite,
which was the most disappointing of all the Marvel shows to me
because I was so excited.
But the movies, so you get to see these comic books come to life, and it's so great.
But now we're all into comic books that I don't remember.
Yeah.
And it's all getting all witchy now, too.
I mean, I watch that Doctor Strange multiverse of madness.
I'm like, well, this is – I'm muting parts because i'm like i don't want to hear
your spells i'm not trying to get you know yeah i get it you know like wandavision i love that show
but as it got to the last couple of episodes it got real witchy and i would i would completely
mute it i was like i don't know what you're doing here yeah i don't know what you're not
summoning you're not summoning things in my house yeah you get everybody you make everybody sleep with head
like those headphones we had eleanor yes yeah like kind of like a metal around them oh yeah yeah
uh yeah we did uh i posted it on instagram but youtube we did that like a haunted we
like haunted house but then
Justin Schubert
who films all that
he was like doing the thing
we talk in the recorder
and say hey are you
and listen for the answers
and we did it
and I was like
it was fun
and funny at first
but then the more
I've thought about it
I was like
I didn't like that
like I don't want to do that
I like going to see like
a haunted thing
or that if it is haunted
or something like that
but then it was like
talking to him
you're like eh you're like Nickerson was like no yeah yeah yeah he was like i'm not
having it yeah and i was you know when i thought back i was like i don't know if i should have been
but you know i have some weird dreams now too late now you brought it here to the studio
well my mom brought some toys that i had as a kid one time, and they were like these little,
like, I don't know, weird, like kind of medieval toys where it was like a Minotaur and all this stuff. And I was like, oh, and then the box, it was real old. The box smelled weird. And I don't
know what, but I was like, oh, this is, oh, this is fun. I remember these and I put them in a
closet. And then that night I had a dream about something. I had a dream that I was upstairs in
that room where that closet is. And my TV kept cutting on and I kept turning it off. And then
the TV would come back on. I'm like, why does this TV keep coming on? And then I woke up and I felt
so weird that I went up there and I got those toys and I threw them in the trash. I was like,
I don't know what that is, but it felt like it brought something into the house.
And I'm like, I am not into that.
And then you think the trash was enough to get it?
Was the trash in the house?
No, no, it was outside.
Oh, of course.
I mean, I went outside.
I think so.
I think it got it.
I mean, you know, I prayed, but I think it.
Just the trash get in his room.
No, no, it was gone.
I was like, this is getting out of here.
You came back in and there
was back in the house yeah the ghosts have a lot of weakness the fact that you can just go whatever
the thing they are you can like i'll just put you outside and they're like all right well i think
they could be attached to things you know yeah i don't know i know but i'm saying then you just get
it outside and it's like yeah just haunting the trash can haunt the trash can all you want he
locked the door too i'll give that to the trash man that you want me to fight.
Yeah, pay him a little extra.
Well, now there's a Superman comic book.
His son has taken over, Jonathan.
Superman has a son?
Jonathan Kent.
Jonathan Kent.
He goes by John.
John Kent.
John and Clark. Does he... John Kent. He's...
John and Clark.
Does he have a name?
Like a superhero name?
Superman Jr.?
Superboy.
It's called Superman's Son of Kal-El.
And I think he's Superman himself.
Now, he's in a same-sex relationship.
And so he's come out as bi.
And the things now he fights is he combats wildfires
caused by climate change,
he stopped a high school shooting,
and he protested the deportation of some refugees from Metropolis.
There you go.
That sounds about right.
Well, it sounds like if he's Superman, though,
he just could stop all those things.
You don't need to really protest.
Well, he stopped the high school shooting.
If you're protesting anything as Superman, you're not like really utilizing your powers like why protest
just stop it yeah imagine being on a protest with superman and he's like let's stop doing this and
they're like the other people are like why don't you just stop it yeah but i mean that's him just
like saying i'm taking over the world and breaking these laws.
And that's not Superman.
He honors the government.
But this is John Kent.
This is not Clark.
This is a new age of Superman.
Stuff that I think Superman, that age group,
is going through with their kids.
That kind of thing.
He's like, I'm in the protest now.
Oh, boy.
Here we go. I'm not saying Clark supports it. Clark's probably, like you said, he's rolling his'm in the protest now he's like oh boy here we go yeah
i'm not saying clark supports it clark's probably like you said he's rolling his eyes lois this is
your son i guess i'm just saying if i'm a protest i told you we should move back to kansas yeah
yeah if i'm a protester and superman's out there with me protesting i'm like just
do something about it yeah just. Just blow a little bit.
Yeah.
Freeze some people out here.
Yeah, just.
Stop global warming.
Yeah.
Blow.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Just figure his ice caps are melting.
Okay.
Go.
Fan him a little bit.
Yeah.
Go ice him, dude.
Yeah.
And put him back to.
Christopher Reeves, Superman froze an entire lake with his
breath and then carried that lake to put out a fire yeah this new superman's protester the new
one says that's what we should do yeah and you go yeah but you should you can do it yeah he goes
i don't i shouldn't have to do it right because. Because he doesn't feel it. Right. Yeah.
Because he could be anxious.
That's true.
The new Superman could be anxious.
That's what they should do is create a new Superman that he's like,
I don't, I just don't like going fast.
Yeah.
And they go, okay.
But like it's, someone's going to fall off that building.
He goes, I'll get there when I get there.
That's not my responsibility.
And it's a Superman that does not solve anything. But he's on goes, I'll get there when I get there. That's not my response. And it's a Superman that
does not solve anything.
But he's on just, I mean, every morning
he gets up and just
got a sea of medication before his mirror.
So he attacks the day.
But none of it works because his body
is too strong for it.
Yeah. That'd be fun.
There's now,
I guess there was just a movie, an animated movie about super dogs or super pets.
And Superman had a dog, Crypto.
And he had the intelligence of a human.
Not very creative.
They just named everything.
That's also what he calls his money.
Yeah.
Cryptocurrency.
Yeah.
That's what hurts him, too.
Yeah.
And so he calls his dog Crypto.
But he's from Krypton.
Oh.
Yeah.
Man, good thing you left then, huh?
Yeah, yeah.
Dangerous place.
Yeah.
That's what we need is super dogs.
Yeah, what would the dog do?
I think he had a lot of the same powers as Superman.
Wow, that seems terrifying.
Yeah.
Yeah. Come on now.
He's whistling.
He's just gone.
Throw a ball.
He goes and gets it in California.
What is the point of a cape?
Because this dog has a cape.
Drag.
I think it's an advertisement.
Because otherwise you're like, well,
is that Superman or is that just Joe Blow up there?
Yeah.
Right.
But he's got a cape.
For the purpose of the dog, I'd say he's right.
There's a lot of superheroes that wear capes, though.
Yeah, but I'm saying what is.
I know.
So many that sometimes they'll say not all superheroes wear capes. Yeah.
Yeah.
I would.
That's where Spider-Man's like, yeah.
I'd wear a cape, but I would be like, I would have like some sleeves.
I'd want a full suit.
I'd want to, yeah.
That's like in the Wolverine movies, they never have him have the hat on.
You know, in the comic books, he always had that kind of helmet, the full yellow suit.
And you never get that.
He always wore the suit under Superman.
Yeah.
But that would be, you know, does he ever take it off?
Well, I think he wears it to work.
Yeah.
But then you've got to put that on in the morning.
It's super tight.
Yeah.
It's not comfortable.
But I guess he's so strong that when you pull socks,
it's just he does it so much faster.
Well, he used to go into a phone booth change.
Yeah, but he would have it on.
I know it, but I'm saying he can't do that anymore
because there's no phone booths. Yeah, where did he put his suit? Why would he have to go to a phone booth change. Yeah, but he would have it on. I know it, but I'm saying he can't do that anymore because there's no phone booths.
Yeah, where did he put his suit?
Why would he have to go to a phone booth to change
if he's just wearing?
He got to take his clothes off.
He doesn't want people to know Clark Kent just turned into.
Phone booth see-through?
Yeah, it didn't make a lot of sense, but.
No, he does it so quick.
Then why even go into a phone booth?
Because there's a phone booth right there.
Why are you not going to go in a phone booth to change? If you wanted to there's a phone booth right there. Why are you not going to go in a phone booth?
Change?
If you wanted to change
and you saw a phone booth,
I think you'd go in.
Feel a little comfortable.
A little modesty there.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But if I were just changing into something
that I'm wearing underneath this,
I'd just take it off.
Yeah,
but if you didn't want me to know
you're the guy that is the guy.
Yeah,
well,
jump up to the moon real quick,
change,
and then jump back down.
Or just go to the bathroom. Yeah, but it's like a whole thing. Yeah. Yeah, well, jump up to the moon real quick, change, and then jump back down. Or just go to the bathroom.
Yeah, but it's like a whole thing.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I think that phone booth is anonymous.
If you go into the bathroom, they're like, I saw Clark just go in there.
And then Superman comes out, and you're like, what happened to Clark?
Yeah.
And Superman's like, he didn't go in there.
You could say, well, there's multiple people in that bathroom.
See, a phone booth, though, you're like, wait a second.
I saw Clark go in there.
He goes, no, he didn't. He goes, I walked to that phone booth. is you're you're like wait a second i saw clark going there goes
i didn't maybe that's because i walked to that phone but there's 15 people in there he goes go
in there maybe that's the reason for the double toilet in the stall yeah you know what i mean oh
yeah so clark and superman can both go in there yeah yeah yeah figured it out yeah in the 90s
marvel was about to go bankrupt and michael jackson tried to buy them so he could play Spider-Man.
All right.
But I guess they figured a way to stay afloat
and not have Michael Jackson buy Marvel,
because he was going to take his own spin on Spider-Man for sure.
I mean, how much?
That dude had so much money.
I think that'd be awesome.
That was...
He was a corporation. Yeah. That's what's crazy, be awesome that was he was a corporation yeah like that's what's crazy
but it was like he was versus now it's corporation but like that guy just to be able to be like i'll
buy marvel then you buy all the beatles things too what about this the tope in what was it spider-man
three where toby mcguire was like the evil-Man. He had that dancing scene that everybody references all the time now.
Imagine if that were Michael Jackson.
It'd be good.
It would have been amazing.
Yeah, I don't know if I know.
Oh, I kind of, yeah, I don't know.
I kind of remember this.
It would have all been worth it.
I might have checked it out.
It would have totally been worth it.
I like Spider-Man a lot.
I like Spider-Man too. I like Superman a lot, but Spider-Man does. I don have checked it out. It would have totally been worth it. I like Spider-Man a lot. I like Spider-Man too.
I like Superman a lot, but Spider-Man does.
I do like Spider-Man.
I don't like his attitude.
Which one, really?
Any of them.
They're all a little too sassy for me.
Superman's not.
I'm talking about Spider-Man.
Oh, you're saying all the Spider-Mans are a little sassy.
Yeah, I don't like his attitude.
Oh, I thought you meant every superhero.
A little arrogant, a little sassy.
Tobey Maguire was...
They're all so whiny.
They're always so whiny. Like, oh get my can't ask my girlfriend on a date and it's like you're spider-man dude
yeah you should be dealing with you still you should you still shouldn't have your head wrapped
around you being shooting webs out of your own body that you should be like god i want to go on
this date with this girl you're like yeah dude we're like four months ago, you were a regular person.
So let's focus on how are you already adjusted back to,
every day should be like, this is insane.
I mean, you should honestly not even remember that girl
just because she's like, where have you been?
You're like, you don't know what I'm going through right now.
I've been dealing with a lot.
A lot of stuff.
Especially the latest Spider-Man, right?
He's gone
to space and he was dead for a while he was did he go to space he went to space with with with
iron man up in a ship and and it was it's like and now you're worried about asking your high
school crush on a date yeah you've done a lot gotta be 40 now too that's had to yeah that's
had to have built some confidence.
Yeah, how old is he?
I mean, I guess he's just the same.
It's a different one, so they're the same.
Yeah, so they're always in high school.
Every movie, they go, let's start this movie again.
Yeah.
But yeah, in the last one, they're all going to college, right?
I think so, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
And the last one was fun because we're getting into the multiverse,
which is, I don't know, pretty boring to me.
But they brought all the Spider-Mans
into one movie.
Tobey Maguire,
Andrew Garfield,
and whatever the new guy's name is.
Oh, really?
All into one movie.
And they were all dressed as Spider-Man?
Yeah.
They were Spider-Mans
from different timelines.
Dimensions.
The multiverse.
And all the villains
that they all fought
all came back too.
Yeah.
So it was pretty fun in that sense.
Well, what are they doing?
So they're just doing...
That's all that's happening now is everything is like,
oh, we're on a different timeline.
It's just like, well, you got the Titanic behind them too.
You're like, we're just jamming movies.
Yes, exactly.
Exactly.
Like that's just...
It's too much.
That's why even the Doctor Strange and the multiverse madness or it's just
they're going they're all in a different oh this is the uh doctor strange of this timeline and it's
it's too much yeah that's crazy yeah is that what they do they always say that's what they
did comic books like did they used to do this in comic books or something i don't know i think so probably so i
mean they can just do whatever but uh yeah if you want to bring somebody back just change the
timeline of history i mean in the the first superman christopher reeve lois lane died and
then he goes fly so fast backwards around the earth he reverses time yeah yeah why not why not yeah yeah could have just done that right out of the gate but
yeah why not do that whenever any of the bad guys could solve a lot of problems to be solved that
way for sure it's probably a lot on his body i think it was yeah probably warm out i think maybe
he wasn't supposed to do that like the big day but day. But then he just... He just did it.
Yeah.
I think that was it.
It's like you can't mess with that, but he... He wasn't supposed to, but he did it.
He did it.
In Harry Potter, the third book of Harry Potter, one of the characters has a little device,
a time turner, like an hourglass that you flip over and you just go back in time.
And it's pretty important for that book, but then it's just never used again yeah and
all the other books you could it could solve literally any problem in the wizarding world
with this time turner but they're just gone yeah yeah because time travel makes the plot boring
because then when you can when no one can really die then what what are we doing? We're not invested in anything. But Black Widow really died in Endgame.
Yeah. The big spoiler.
Yeah.
Was that a big deal?
Yeah, it was a pretty big deal.
Oh.
I don't know who Black Widow is.
Yeah, I don't know who it is.
Well, I know what you mean.
Yeah.
And then, you know, and Tony Stark really dies.
Yep.
But it's like, for the most part.
Those are pretty giant.
Yeah, that's Iron Man, right?
Well, this was several years ago, though.
Well, it came out after The Family Man.
Yeah.
Let me get to Family Man first.
When was, yeah, when did that, Tony, that one came out?
Because that was a big, I remember everybody going, it's crazy.
2019, I watched it, yeah.
Yeah, 2018, 2019.
They came out back to back.
It was a two-parter there.
Yeah.
It just, yeah.
It does.
They're great if you committed to the whole 19 movies or whatever,
Marvel movies, whatever it was.
I don't think I could keep it together.
It's a full-time job, actually.
It's hard.
If you watch them as they came out, but to get caught up, no way.
Well, because I thought, all right, maybe you go through them,
and you're like, let's watch them all and go through them and see.
But it's like, yeah, you can't have anything going on.
See you in 2024.
Yeah, you can't have anything going on.
And now there's shows, too, that's all canon, I guess.
So it's all part of it.
That's Star Wars.
I mean, Star Wars is doing, you know, it's just, they got that new thing.
And my brother,
my dad and brother
love it all.
Yeah,
I've lost,
I love Star Wars and Marvel,
but now it's just,
it's a full-time job
with all these shows.
I haven't seen Loki.
I haven't seen.
Thor Ragnarok is the best.
It's like you were.
I haven't been listening
the last five minutes.
It's like you were
in another room
and you just
walked back in.
It's a multiverse.
Just think about my baby.
He goes, yeah, yeah, I hear you.
It's like a full-time job trying to watch all this stuff.
There's some real-life superheroes.
There's a guy in Seattle, Phoenix Jones.
He's a mixed martial arts guy. he walks around in a superhero costume.
Nice.
And he polices Seattle.
Oh, this guy's incredible.
That guy's really got his work cut out for him these days, though.
Seattle.
Seattle's pretty wild now.
Maybe it's because we're missing Phoenix Jones.
I like that.
What did he do?
Does he still do it?
I think he maybe,
the police have convinced him
to stop doing it
because he was just
causing more trouble.
Making too much progress.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean,
that's,
yeah.
I'm way on board now.
Like,
yeah.
Like,
I think he should let him do it.
There's a guy in Nashville
that, did I send you that one? The guy that, what's his name? Like, yeah. Like, I think he should let him do it. There's a guy in Nashville.
Did I send you that one?
The guy that, what's his name?
Master Legend?
No, I think he's the guy in Orlando, but maybe I didn't say it to you.
There was a guy.
Oh, in the Viper?
Well, that guy's in Columbia, Tennessee.
Columbia's got one.
Oh, really?
Yeah. But anyway, he just walks through. So there's a lot of towns that have. How are we one. Oh, really? Yeah.
But anyway, he just walks through.
So there's a lot of towns that have- How are we just breezing over this?
So what does this guy do?
It says Tennessee's unemployed, which is 10.3% of the workforce.
When did this article come out?
This came out 2010.
Okay, July 8th.
Very recent.
One man in the small town of Columbia who's almost certainly jobless
has even become a superhero.
He's dubbed himself the Viper.
He wears a green suit and a mask.
No pictures of him in this article, which is pretty upsetting.
That's good.
I think he's-
That means he's doing a good job, yeah.
Yeah.
So far has only succeeded in annoying the local police
who say he violates an ordinance against wearing masks in public places.
Boy, times have changed.
That's crazy.
This guy's a hero now just because of wearing a mask.
Yeah, yeah.
This guy was ahead of his time.
He goes, I'm sorry, I was fighting COVID in 2010.
So what laws, like, if these superheroes were real,
what laws would they, I mean, you'd have to have some major insurance well just imagine superman and that one that you asked that such in a real
like we brought dusty in as a yeah well you're right i did yeah dusty go ahead well superman
in the first whatever the one that came out most recently the of that series
the first one where he fights the people from his home planet right and they completely destroy
the city i mean the two of them are shooting through buildings and the buildings are falling
down or are the marvel uh avengers movie the first avengers where they completely destroy the city
it's like okay okay, yeah,
you saved us, potentially. We don't know
what the aliens were about to do.
And you completely destroyed
the city. And, I mean, probably
most people
died in these buildings.
And then in Batman vs. Superman, the next
one, there's a guy who got paralyzed
from their fight, if I remember correctly.
Probably so. Multiple. And they went to next one there's a guy who got paralyzed from their fight if i remember correctly probably so
and they were multiple they went to congress to try to stop superman because he's causing damage
does anybody uh tally up the damage i feel like i've seen heard about that or something like they
go like it would cost trillions of dollars you know these superheroes did so i know well that's
not very much matt damon he's been rescued from another planet three times.
And I think they said it would cost like a trillion dollars to do that.
Wow.
Martian.
The Martian and then Interstellar.
And then there's one other movie.
He might be a good reference.
Is he in Interstellar?
Or is that Matthew Morales?
They're both in it.
Oh.
I thought I've been thinking about watching that one.
Interstellar's really good.
Oh, I've been thinking about doing that one. Interstellar's really good. Oh, I've been thinking
about doing that one.
I see it all the time.
I think I've already said this,
but I don't even believe
the stuff going on in there,
but it blew my mind.
Oh, Saving Private Ryan
was the third one
where he got rescued.
That was probably
a little bit cheaper.
Yeah, that was like 40 bucks.
Yeah.
So in Zack Snyder's film
Man of Steel,
they estimate that he cost
$2 trillion worth of damage and killed 129,000 people.
Wow.
And do we even know if Zod had bad plans for the planet?
I mean, maybe Zod wanted to just live down here for a while.
I think he said, turn over Superman or we're going to destroy your planet.
Wasn't that his message to Earth?
Yeah, he just wanted Superman.
Which is a deal.
Yeah. wasn't that his message to earth yeah he just wanted superman which is a deal yeah if you i
mean if you read but if you say he's going to destroy earth you got to be like all right yeah
yeah super its impact was comparable to the the nagasaki nuke
so yeah yeah dude he's uh a menace so turn over super. So yeah, it seems like, well, let's just give up Superman.
Yeah.
We didn't even know we had him not long ago.
We were doing fine without him.
Yeah, but maybe you need him.
Well, every time these superheroes show up,
right after there's a supervillain that shows up.
So you're right back where you started.
At least Batman seems to come out to fight the crime.
He fights crime.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He's fighting the city that looks like it's pretty badly run.
Right.
And corrupt.
Especially Tim Burton Batmans.
Yeah.
Those Michael Keaton ones.
I mean, that city looks wild.
Yeah.
Does Bruce Wayne leverage any of his billions of dollars
to help improve the city that way?
No, he just buys cars.
Yeah.
That does more damage to the city.
Yeah.
Goes through buildings.
Yeah.
He's got to be like, hey, I got to shoot out under this.
He's got to go to the city board to be like,
I got a spider-type car.
If y'all don't mind, I'm going to do it.
I'm going to come to the Lincoln Tunnel.
I'm going to go up through that.
They go, all right, is it going to be workable after?
They go, no, damn it.
Millions of dollars worth of damage.
I don't even, yeah, priceless.
The damage is priceless is what I'm going to do.
But I pop out.
Yeah, just count on not using it anymore.
Yeah.
They're like, could you just have like a regular garage and stuff like that somewhere?
Could you live in New Jersey?
Yeah, yeah.
Would you be fine with that?
And yeah, he has a car that even drives up the side of a building in one of the movies.
I think I read one of these cities, either Metropolis or one of those superhero cities,
they have like an insurance for the city.
I got a superhero who lives here, so we're just going to have a $100 billion
insurance policy or something like that.
What insurance company agreed to that?
Yeah.
What citizens agreed
to pay the taxes
to whatever it is to cover it?
Yeah. I mean, that's like you'd be building
a new stadium every day.
Yeah.
Every day would just be,
we're doing a new dome stadium.
Oh, boy.
Your buddy saves all the line.
I don't want to complain.
Yeah, it would be a battle just going, well, we could be frozen.
And you go, I know.
Yeah.
Don't upset it.
You got to move. I mean, the crime would probably be gone because you would just everybody be like we're just moving out of this well that's what i always think like
if if you got superman in metropolis and you're the bad guy maybe just pick a city that superman's
not in you know you be a villain in in you know la metropolis illinois like yeah go check that out
yeah go to casino so some unsuccessful superheroes that never took off red bee this guy uh carried
trained bees in his belt and he would turn them loose his favorite bee was named michael and
he would turn them loose that's what killed it named Michael, and he would turn them loose.
That's what killed it.
Yeah, yeah.
That's what killed it.
You can't have a bee named Michael.
Even in his real life, he was the assistant district attorney,
not even the district attorney.
Oh.
And he was eventually killed by some Nazis.
Wow.
Whoa.
That took a turn.
They brought it into the real world.
Golly.
Yeah.
Maybe if he worked a little harder at being a district attorney than training bees.
Michael.
Michael.
Yeah.
Michael, over here.
How do you even know?
Which one's Michael?
Yeah.
Mikey.
Michael.
Michael.
Bible Man.
This was a TV series that lasted for a while.
He would go up against deadly, sinful enemies, and he would...
How many seasons is that?
19 seasons.
Oh, my gosh.
That's hard to say.
That was unsuccessful.
Wow.
Yeah, you're right.
It was...
The longest running shows on TV history.
Yeah.
I mean, Bible Man.
Yeah. And I looked, Bible Man. Yeah.
And I looked at some videos on YouTube.
It's very cheesy, but they know it's cheesy, so they're not trying to...
It's tongue-in-cheek.
Yeah, they're not trying to act like we think.
It doesn't even seem to be carrying a Bible, though.
Well, he's got it all memorized.
That's right.
I guess, yeah.
I'm sure he's got it in his pocket.
But yeah, Madame Fatale was a guy who dressed up as an old lady
okay and then uh i think i opened for her once comedy's own gig
and is it madame fatal maybe yeah probably fatale i don't know. It's spelled F-A-T-A-L.
Okay.
Fatal would be, Madame Fatal would be too on there.
You're like, well, I don't know if I trust.
You're right.
You know, like how would you, if that was the name, though, you go,
you want some cookies from Madame Fatal?
You're like, I don't know if I want.
Or you go Fatal, but you'll have a couple.
Yeah, that's probably, yeah, good.
What made the guy decide that he would dress up as an old lady?
It's like a Mrs. Doubtfire type thing.
I want to babysit your kids.
He wanted to fight crime, but he doesn't have any real superhero's power, but he's a good fighter.
So he thought if he dresses up as a woman, then it'll be unassuming.
That's his superpower. He surprises him.
He'll sneak up on people.
Yeah, old lady.
He wants to be a superhero, but he doesn't have superhero powers.
Yeah. So then he dresses like a woman
and then fights him just with his
regular body. I think he's a great
fighter just as a person.
And then they say, oh, look at this old lady.
And then he punches him.
They're like, that lady packed a punch. Yeah. And then they say, oh, look at this old lady. And then he punches them. They're like, that lady packed a punch.
Yeah, he's surprised by it.
Yeah.
He uses a cane as his weapon.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So.
Okay.
So you've probably heard, if you could have one superpower,
flying or being invisible, which one would you choose?
They did a poll.
Scientists did some research.
Oh, that's good.
Well, I think you just...
So, Wichita State.
Yeah, yeah.
I think you just go ahead and arrest all the people that want to be invisible.
Because flying is the obvious one.
If you want to be invisible, you got some creepy intentions.
Yeah.
Well, there's a lot of...
I have a lot of follow-up questions before I decide.
Yeah.
I have a lot of follow-up questions before I decide.
Yeah.
Do I fly at the same speed that I run, or how fast can I fly?
Oh, like if it's not fast, it's like, yeah. If I can only fly at the same speed that I walk, what's the point of that?
I'll take it.
Yeah.
I mean, just going upstairs, you could have just getting on a roof you sold me yeah
well it's like going up one flight yeah one flight is like just to be able to float out of here and
just be excuse me uh i mean do you have to flap your arms and do you get real tired i mean that's
that's a question that's like superman the speed thing would be tough though because it would be
like everybody probably knows
and then you're on an airplane
and you're like,
well,
I only can like fly as like fast
as I can run
and you're like,
so it would take me
a week to get,
you know.
Yeah,
like your friends are like,
we're about to drive to this thing
and you're like,
no,
I'll fly
and then they beat you there.
Yeah.
I would,
I would choose.
Well,
you would fly every,
all your direction would be As a crow flies
As a crow flies
So you would be
As Aaron flies
Just you'd have to be
Yeah as Aaron flies
You'd have to be a lot of
A lot of crow knowledge
Yeah
You still gotta carry your phone
That's the thing
You'd be with the crows a lot
Yeah
And that's what'd be tough
Yeah
Just a lot of crow traffic
There's a lot of GPS
Recalculating
Recalculating
Yeah
I know it's random
I would choose invisibility And then I wouldn't Think about my nose whistle And everybody would be like Pro traffic. There's a lot of GPS recalculating. Recalculating. I know it's random.
I would choose invisibility,
and then I wouldn't think about my nose whistle.
Everybody would be like,
y'all hear something?
Brian, is that you?
Are you in here again?
Visibility would be fun.
You could do it.
All mischievous stuff, though.
Yeah.
Hollow Man, you ever seen that movie?
Yeah, and it got dark quick.
Yeah.
Oh, no.
Was that with Kevin Bacon bacon yeah yeah so you could be you could go see anything like you go see
uh and you could go inside a prison or something you could go inside a like you know no one would
know you're there you could go but imagine getting locked in think about think about the act you can
do you could you would be a vegas
act that would be a magic act that you would be the greatest i mean but also flying too you'd be
would you have to wear clothes are the clothes invisible interesting depends on what universe
you're in which multiverse yeah what did the poll say? Well, the poll, they polled 7,000 leaders across the globe.
Leaders?
Oh, they all said invisible then.
No.
Did you say leaders?
L-E-A-D-E-R-S.
So they say I'm a leader?
This is like some Forbes poll or something.
There we go.
You're a leader?
I think so.
I like to think so.
Yeah.
You want to be invisible or fly?
I didn't see that question coming.
72% chose flying.
They want to be seen.
They want to get stuff done.
More followers chose invisibility.
They want to hide.
Oh, so they interviewed leaders and followers.
Yeah.
Company executives and then lower level people.
Do you think the right amount of people identify as a follower?
I imagine there are more followers than those that would identify as a follower.
It's like a pejorative phrase.
Are you a leader or a follower?
I guess I'm a leader, you know?
How hot is your piss? Yeah, that's what I'm saying, essentially, yeah. pejorative phrase. Are you a leader or a follower? I guess I'm a leader. How hot is your piss?
That's what I'm saying, essentially.
Pejorative.
What was that?
What do you mean?
What does pejorative mean?
It has a negative connotation, too.
This guy's a leader.
I got over back away from the table and got his college dream back.
If we had our own superpower, what would it be?
Based on our skill set.
I was thinking about you, Dusty.
I think every time you raise your hand, we're having a good time,
something happens.
A joy would come across.
A joy.
You'd have to have your hand up the whole time.
And that's the thing, when you get tired, then chaos would.
Oh, yeah. Oh, I kind of like that. That's fun that's fine yeah literally it can't be down for a split second it's got to be complete chaos there's a guy in india that has had his arm raised for almost 50
years wow wow to honor his god really yeah he's like i want to do it just to honor my god and he's
he's held it up for almost 50 years and what and how does he keep it up well now he can't lower it oh uh oh that's crazy yeah the hand is not in good shape either i don't
even want to zoom in on it no it's uh yeah he hasn't been getting manicures i think his fingers
are crooked oh that's the hand oh i didn't even see that one. I thought that was a stick holding the tin up.
Yeah.
Dang, dude.
Yeah.
I mean, I admire the dedication to anything.
To do anything for, I mean, it says 38 years in this article,
but that was 11 years ago.
So yeah, he's still doing it.
Wow.
Yeah, I read one recently where he's doing it for 50 years.
Wow.
He left his job, wife, and three children in 1970 to do this.
Yeah, I think it would be a full-time job.
So, Dusty, you got to take it up a notch.
Yeah, you can't hang out with people.
Everybody thinks you're asking a question.
Yes, you, sir.
Go to a conference.
Questions at the end.
Comes in yeah yeah i imagine it's raining and you kind
of get inside the door and then you're like everybody's pushed in but they forget that
your arm's up and you get caught in the door like you go up and he goes i'm sorry so he he's
inspired other people to do it too they got a got a bunch of people. Some have done seven, 13, or even 25 years.
So he's got a whole generation.
Can you imagine how painful that would be?
He said it hurt a lot at first, and then it just,
and now his arm just can't even move.
It atrophied.
Stuck in that position.
At first.
How long do you think that period was?
Oh, it's got to be.
Years.
Years.
Like, yeah.
But I mean, if you're doing it for 50 years it's like yeah
you're like the first three were bad and then you're like you're just stuck i mean but you know
yeah do you think you ever like man i wish i'd done the other hand yeah or just switch it up
yeah maybe just alter yeah wonder if shiva shows up one day and goes i didn't need you to do that. Yeah.
It's, I mean, you know.
It's a bit much.
It's his thing.
It's his thing.
Good for him.
Yeah.
So, yeah, we got yours picked out.
Aaron Goutman.
Yeah.
I don't know.
I would like to know.
He's got a strong limp.
To be able to speak.
He can limp.
Limp over buildings. With a single limp. Yeah. With a single limp. To be able to speak. You can limp over buildings.
With a single limp.
With a single limp.
What were you going to say?
Speak other languages?
To know every language in the world.
That's one that actually is, in theory, it's attainable,
but I don't know anyone.
But you would be, yeah, like you just know it.
You can talk to anybody.
Just know it right away.
That'd be very cool. And then I would be the guy that's sent it you can talk to anybody just know it right away that'd be very
cool and then i would be the guy that's sent to talk to the aliens yeah well like in the matrix
you could just program your brain to do it put it up but then like yeah at this point too you're
also like well i got a phone that we could just i say it and then you hear it that's true and so
then there's like right now you would just be like kind of like you're just expensive.
We can have a phone.
Like I'm saying, as a superhero, you speak every language.
I think you've got yourself out of a job.
You no longer have a full time job because we're just like doing phones and stuff.
Phones are still a little cumbersome.
You're nervous, though.
You're nervous.
I am a lot.
You know, if you do flight, you know, we have planes.
Does that make you nervous?
If your thing is,
no,
but that's like a fun thing,
but your skill language is fun too,
dude.
Yeah. But I could like get on top of a building and do stuff like you're,
you gotta go.
What are you?
You gotta go see what everybody's doing.
Like every day he's gotta be like,
how is your day?
And 40 languages,
just small talk at every language.
Yeah.
And then you have to go talk and and then it's like big negotiations.
And then you start doing it, and the guy's like, I speak English.
Well, in my scenario, I'm the only one in the world that gets to pick a super.
If everybody else gets super powers, I wouldn't pick that,
because then I'd feel left out.
Yeah, yeah, I'm saying, but even if that is your superpower,
I just think you're nervous for work right now.
Okay.
I still think you're working.
Okay.
Your heyday.
I'm still doing comedy in English.
Yeah, your heyday was.
Oh, dude, I'd be the biggest comedian in the world, dude, if I could do.
That would be, you'd be the biggest.
I could tour everywhere.
You could tour everywhere.
But still.
Starting to rethink it a little bit?
Now I'm rethinking it.
Yeah.
Would the jokes translate? The Raincheckia tour yeah you know yeah he would they would translate because you would get you would get the references yeah yeah so not only
speak it but even the jokes themselves would make still make sense yeah without that it's useless
well i'd read up on what's going on if i spoke the language i think it should just
come i mean that should be part of it if you get that wish that just comes with it you don't have
to do any extra work yeah okay why why put extra work on yourself you're like i speak all the
languages i might as well just lump it in with this yeah yeah and i understand and i'm relatable
to everybody yeah i mean i i would I think I would go superhuman strength.
That's what I would like.
But look the same.
Not look like the Incredible Hulk, but just be able to like,
people are like, oh man, my car jack broke,
and I could just come over and lift it up.
But be very modest about it.
There's one that does that, right?
What's his name?
I think his last name is he has normal name like uh jones or oh he's pretty big though who you talking about um
he had a tv show too yeah on mark it was on uh netflix yeah i mean he's pretty jacked
luke cage yeah yeah but he's not... Yeah, I guess he is pretty big.
I guess Superman is not jacked.
Yeah.
He's big, but he's not like the Hulk.
Yeah.
Well, to build muscle, there has to be resistance, right?
But if you have infinite strength, then you wouldn't be ripped.
I would think flying.
Flying would be...
I'm just trying to think.
Because I was thinking speed would be fun, too, to be super fast.
Yeah.
Super strong.
But flying, like, it wouldn't be bad.
It would be bad.
If you could fly fast, I mean, you fly to your shows.
In the last.
I'm still doing comedy.
So Marvel had the Avengers, and then DC did Justice League
and one of them was the Flash.
Yeah.
But then in it,
Superman races him
and is basically a tie.
So then you're like,
well, why do we need the Flash then?
He can't do anything.
He's just a fast guy.
We already got Superman.
Nothing.
Superman could do pretty much all of them.
There's really no need for Justice League
when you have Superman.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. you have Superman. Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
There isn't.
Yeah.
Rant Man.
He could be Rant Man.
Rant Man.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Skim Boy.
He's always on Rant.
And the people just leave because the villains are like, just get out of here.
You could change anybody's mind about anything.
That's a superpower.
Mm-hmm.
Extreme charisma.
Mind reading.
Persuasion.
I don't know if you'd want that. I know. Mind reading sounds like it's a curse. Extreme charisma. Mind reading. Persuasion. I don't know if you'd want that.
No, mind reading sounds like it's a curse.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Who would want to read people's minds?
That's an X-Man.
That's Professor X.
That's what he does.
Yeah.
Okay.
Does he like it?
I mean, he's a-
He can manipulate people too, though.
He doesn't just read and hear what they think about him.
He can speak into their minds
he can make you just freeze otherwise normal guy it'd be like youtube comments uh in real time oh
my gosh you know way worse too yeah you could be like uh yoda like get like that superpower
is yoda right the force where you can force yeah like just be the force because then you're just
like you know i'm like want some more water it's like you just i'm talking to you and it just
starts pouring right here and you just yeah that'd be a great one yeah or you fly down to the kitchen
and make yourself yeah yeah because he can fly or if you have super even strength you just turn
over the table yeah people are like oh let's get this guy some water.
Yeah, yeah.
Let's get this guy some water.
They don't really fly.
They kind of bound and leap a little bit.
Enough.
Enough.
You get around enough.
I'll tell you real fast, some really bad villains that didn't work out.
The living eraser.
I like that.
It's the guy who went around And just erased things
Causing chaos
Like buildings?
I think he could erase whatever
Yeah
Just whatever needs to be done
Oh people
I guess he had to rub on you though
Like physical things
Or concepts
No it looks like he erased people
No not concepts
Yeah
This is from like the 50s
He could erase happiness
Asbestos lady.
They really missed an opportunity making this guy like pencil guy.
You know?
Like his head's an eraser, his feet are ink.
Oh, look at him erasing this dude.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I love this guy.
Asbestos lady.
This is before people knew asbestos was bad.
So that was her skill.
And then...
So she was a hero until they found out,
actually, this lady's giving us cancer.
Well, she was a villain.
And then they found out that asbestos is deadly
and can kill you.
So they diagnosed her with lung cancer.
Wow.
What were we doing with asbestos before that?
I don't always think about it on ceilings and stuff.
It was like a way to seal.
Like insulation.
Yeah, like insulation.
Yeah.
Flag Smasher.
He's a guy who was not loyal to any one nation.
He would go around destroying it.
He was basically Captain America's nemesis.
Captain America was all about America.
Flag Smasher.
It's kind of like wrestling.
There's a lot of similarities.
You got Hulk Hogan, and then you got the
Iron Sheik, or you got somebody from Russia
that's kind of the
opposite, just to kind of get people
worked up. So he just hated all countries?
I like this guy. That weapon he has
is a lot of fun. The gun? No, no.
The spike ball there. Okay.
Yeah. Two different iterations
of him. Yeah, that's fun.
All right.
Yeah, I'm into this.
I should have.
You all picked funny as a superhero.
Boom.
Boom roasted.
Boom roasted.
All right, that's it.
Coming out
Next week
Next week
So the week of the
November 7th
8th
Something like that
Like it's that
Whatever night
I think it comes out
On the 9th
The 9th
So yeah
I'll be somewhere
Maybe in Louisville
A bunch of places
Pennsylvania
All my stuff's up there
Where you guys at?
I'm in my hometown Of Lebanon this Friday at Cumberland University.
Wow.
Same place Bozo plays?
Yeah, maybe.
Yeah.
Doing a show at Cumberland University with Heather Lange.
She's very funny.
And it's for New Leash on Life, an animal rescue place.
Oh, that's cool.
Yeah.
Next week, Wednesday, I'm in Memphis, Tennessee.
Yeah, from Hollywood.
At Lafayette's Music Room.
I'm sure it's pronounced Lafayette, but from Alabama, you say Lafayette.
Lafayette.
Or Lafayette.
Lafayette, yeah.
Lafayette Music Room.
And then that weekend, St. Paul, Minnesota.
Oh, I've done that room before, Memphis.
It's a lot of fun.
Oh, yeah, the music room?
It's a lot of fun, yeah.
I'll be there.
November 16th.
I'll be there, too.
That same day?
I don't think so.
November what?
16th.
Like a Thursday or something?
I think it's a Wednesday.
You find out you got bumped.
I'll be in Washington, D.C. at the D.C. Improv this weekend.
But I also wanted to say that me and Aaron and Brian have a show in Lexington on January 3rd.
February 3rd.
February 3rd, yes.
And then I'll be in Atlanta.
That just announced today, but by the time this comes out, that will have been
further down the road.
February 4th. The third in Lexington
and then the fourth, I'll be in Atlanta.
Those are on sale now.
Go see them. All three of y'all. Look at y'all.
I'll be in Memphis the 12th and 13th.
You're Memphis the weekend before. Yeah, the weekend
before.
That Bryce Jordan Center in State College, PA.
People come out to that.
It's a big place.
Yeah.
But since I announced a couple of things, this weekend, DC Improv.
Nice.
Okay.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Very fun.
That's a great club.
Good?
I've never been, but they say it's-
Oh, that place is awesome.
They say it's great.
No, no, no.
The club's great.
Yeah.
The club is one of my favorite clubs.
Yeah.
They say it's great.
No, no, no. The club's great.
Yeah.
The club is one of my favorite clubs.
Yeah.
It's the ceilings.
The stage is higher and the ceiling's lower, and you just murder.
Like, it's just so that you hear the laugh so great.
It's one of the best clubs in the country.
Yeah.
All right.
So if it doesn't go that way for me, I'll just quit right after.
Yeah.
You should.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That and Arlington Draft House is another club there.
DC's got two great, great clubs and a bunch of other rooms.
DC's got a good comedy scene.
Yeah, for sure.
All right, everybody, we love you.
See you next week.
Oh, yeah.
Happy birthday, Brian Bates.
Oh!
All right.
Happy birthday.
Thank you.
Happy birthday.
Yeah, we had Eleanor.
Yeah, we had Eleanor on for my birthday. Thank you, guys. So we had Eleanor yeah we had Eleanor on for my birthday thank you guys
thanks guys
happy birthday
I can't do it that's Aaron's thing
Nate Land is produced by Nate Land Productions and me nate bargetzi and my wife laura on the all
things comedy network recording and editing for the show is done by genovations media
thanks for tuning in be sure to catch us next week on the nateland podcast