The Nateland Podcast - 160: #160 School
Episode Date: August 9, 2023Nate is still in Australia but Brian, Aaron, and Dusty carry on this week by reliving their school days. The guys go down memory lane to talk about their first day of school, clothes, lunch boxes, Num...ber 2 pencils, Trapper Keepers, and much more. Co-hosts: Brian Bates (https://www.instagram.com/brianbatescomic) Aaron Weber (https://www.instagram.com/realaaronweber) and Dusty Slay (https://instagram.com/dustyslay) Podcast produced by Nate & Laura Bargatze Recording & Editing by Genovations Media https://www.natebargatze.com https://www.genovationsmedia.com Email - Nateland@NateBargatze.com --------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Gametime - gametime.co/ Snag the tickets without the stress with Gametime. Download the Gametime app, create an account, and use code NATE for $20 off your first purchase. Terms apply. Again, create an account and redeem code NATE for $20 off. Download Gametime today. Last minute tickets. Lowest Price. Guaranteed. Fabric - MeetFabric.com/Nate Protect your family today with Fabric by Gerber Life. Apply today in just 10 minutes at meetfabric.com/nate. Policies issued by Western-Southern Life Assurance Company. Not available in certain states.  Prices subject to underwriting and health questions. Zoc Doc - ZocDoc.com/Nate Go to Zocdoc.com/NATE and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Then find and book a top-rated doctor today. Rocket Money - RocketMoney.com/Nate Stop throwing your money away. Cancel unwanted subscriptions – and manage your expenses the easy way – by going to RocketMoney.com/nate.
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Today's episode of the Nightland podcast is brought to you by GameTime, Fabric. I'm your host, Brian Bates.
Brian Bates in the house.
Here with Dusty Slay, Aaron Weber.
But he's coming back soon. This isn't long term.
Yeah, Lauren Harper already back. Well, this is how the Batesville podcast will always be, right?
In what way?
No Nate?
Well, if it's Nateland, Nate's here.
But if you're introducing it as the Batesville podcast, it will always be this way.
That's true.
I don't see Nate signing off to the Batesville podcast while he's here.
You don't think Nate comes on as a guest every now and then?
No.
Yeah, maybe.
Maybe he does a guest appearance next week.
Maybe he will.
I think he's, at this point, he's probably about to go down to New Zealand.
That's pretty cool.
Yeah.
Then he heads home.
That is awesome.
I hope he gets into some homesteading while he's down there.
I hope he does, too.
I saw some photos.
He's been to the zoo.
The Robert Irwin Zoo, right?
Yeah.
I don't know if that's what it's called.
Steve?
Well, Robert's his son.
He's the star of the show now.
Oh.
You guys like a zoo?
I'm not a big fan of a zoo.
Yeah, I like a zoo.
What don't you like about it?
I don't know.
I feel like when I was younger, I liked it, right?
When I was a kid.
But now I always feel like all these animals are locked up.
Well, they are.
You know what I mean, though?
It just feels like, ah, they're just wishing they were out on the range somewhere.
Now they're locked up and I'm just in here looking at them.
But a lot of them have never known a life not in a zoo.
That's sadder to me.
Why is it sad?
They don't even know what they're missing.
Yeah, but I feel like there's a natural instinct and they're like, I'm missing something out
I don't think they miss the Serengeti if they grew up in Little Rock.
Well, maybe, but you know, it's like I've owned mice before in the past.
I had a little mice collection and they spent the collection.
Yeah.
Well, mice breed.
Like that guy from the green mile.
Yeah.
Make them do tricks and stuff.
Well, well, yeah, a little bit.
I mean, mice really get at it though.
You know what I mean?
And they have kids.
And I had so many mice.
And they spend their whole lives trying to escape the cage.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So when I let them go, I turned them loose in the woods.
Oh, that was nice of you.
Because I figured they all got aged.
They all died in 10 minutes.
Yeah.
But at least for that last 10 minutes, they were like, I'm free.
At least they got to feel the sun one last time.
Yeah.
Yes.
Before a hawk ate them.
I've always felt that way about zoos too,
but pro zoo people say these animals usually are going to die so quickly
out in the wild because they're fighting for food and against other
scavengers.
And they have a life of luxury where they get every meal to them.
They don't have to worry about being attacked.
You mean the ones that were born in there, they're going to die?
No, I'm just saying if they were just out in the wild,
they would have a much harder life than being in a zoo
where they know where the meal is coming from.
There's not something about to kill them.
And they're not going to die from being eaten by another animal
like they inevitably would be in the wild. But you could make that argument for jail in a way too right you could i
don't know if i want to but like that's a good point but you could be like well you're in jail
listen you're in jail you don't have a lot of room to run around but we're going to give you
all your meals you're going to get some tv yeah you'll get some companionship you know
it's a good point but you know people come by and look at you all day.
Yeah, we'll do jail tours.
What if they had jail tours?
I know they have jail tours of empty jails, but what if they had active jail tours?
Well, that wouldn't be nice.
I did a juvie tour.
I don't know if it was a tour.
Did they yell at you?
The kids?
Was I scared straight?
No, I was an adult oh okay i was in college and we did a class where we spent a week at juvie hanging out with the kids oh i think
you told me about i used to have a long bit about this but you're supposed to teach football or
something to i was me and the football team okay i was only because i had failed a couple classes
oh yeah the summer school i remember this uh And we played pickup basketball and I got picked last in the whole, all of Jufi.
I got picked.
I mean, there's a seven-year-old that got picked ahead of me.
But yeah, I guess you can call that a tour.
You know, I did a, like a, I tried to do a, like a big brother program one time.
And I think I got rejected by the kid.
I think the kid was like, you know what?
I'm good.
No, I'm more of a lone wolf anyway.
Thanks, but no thanks.
I don't know if I need a brother.
Yeah, we went to a Chick-fil-A.
I don't even know how they let me do it.
I just took him to a Chick-fil-A.
We hung out, and I was just trying to give advice, but I was probably hungover, probably smoked cigarettes on the way.
Where was this?
Charleston.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
But I was, you know, I felt like a good influence, but maybe he stopped it or maybe other people
were like, he keeps coming back smelling like cigarettes.
Yeah.
If you're a big brother hung over smelling cigarettes, the program probably stopped it.
Yeah.
That kid's probably going to do better on his own.
Well, I don't know, but maybe. What kind of advice on his own well i don't know but maybe what kind of
advice were you giving i don't know uh it's a long time ago but you know just good old advice i think
well i said back to the zoo i saw a 60 minutes piece about there's some billionaire who's buying
up zoos and closing them because he agrees with dusty and thinks that they're inhumane. And he took a bunch of chimpanzees and put them back out in the wild,
and they did not last no time.
Yeah, see, I don't agree with this guy.
I'm just saying I'm not totally a zoo guy,
but I don't agree with buying them up and then just turning them loose.
Got to integrate them.
Yeah, you ever see the movie sling blade
yeah you know they let that they let him go and he didn't know what to do
yeah he's out he's been in they've been in that place his whole life very similar yeah
you keep comparing them to the jails and prisons well that's what i mean okay okay that's the
closest we got we don't have like a human zoo now that would be something a human zoo well yeah you
have like the freak show at the fair.
Yeah.
I guess that's as close as we got.
Do they still do that?
I don't think so.
Maybe.
Some of the people walking around here would be like, I'm weirder than these guys.
Circus.
You ever see a picture of like the world's fattest man from like 1920?
Yeah.
Yeah, imagine if you were like a real heavy time traveler and you went to visit him
and they were like whoa look at this dude
we got a new champ here yeah yeah i think i think he weighed like 370 or something where
you're like yeah dude i know a hundred people that weigh more yeah go to any walmart
uh yeah i saw this story about the, you want to show that?
This is that zoo in China?
Yeah.
Where everybody's alleging that it's not really a bear, that it's just a guy dressed in a bear suit.
Have you seen this, Dusty?
No.
I want to get your thoughts, just your initial impressions on whether this is a, let's just sit through this terrible ad for another, it's not even working.
this is a let's just sit through this terrible ad for another it's not even working well you know there's a uh a man that apparently has changed himself into a border collie have you seen that
i saw that no i haven't seen that it looks he was convincing the dogs well it was a suit he didn't
change i he didn't go he didn't go full-time dog they changed him. No, it's a suit that he had made.
Oh, okay.
You thought he had surgery?
I don't know what the guy's up to.
Listen, there's a lot going on these days.
This is the bear that people were saying were fake across.
I mean, he gives a dusty wave.
You get a good shot of it right there.
What do you think?
Look at the back there.
I think that's a bear suit for sure.
They don't have the neck on good.
So you think they couldn't afford a real bear, so they just put a guy out there?
I think it was a punishment.
They were like, you got to be the bear today.
It is drooping there in the back a little bit.
Now, here's the thing.
Now, there is, I thought that too, but there drooping there in the back a little bit. Now, here's the thing. Now, there is.
I thought that, too.
But there is a type of bear called a sun bear that that's exactly what it looks like.
I had never seen this type of bear before.
Their neck looks all weird like that.
They stand up straight like human beings.
That's a real animal.
Hmm.
All right.
Well, I support it.
I think it's real then.
Yeah.
But the way he's standing up though it looks so fake i saw it and i was like oh come on yeah it does look like like an old man
the way he's standing up and it's like his backside is just straight down oh you know what i mean
well uh you want to get into where we've been where we're going yeah let's do a little where
we've been where we're going i uh i went to austin little where we've been, where we're going. I went to Austin, Texas this weekend.
Had a lot of fun.
I did a theater called the Paramount Theater.
All right.
Hot show.
My buddy's Alec Parent and Drew Harrison with me.
Yeah.
Hot show.
Very good.
And I also.
Yeah.
That's sick.
Look at that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Now it wasn't completely sold out, but some people left before we took that picture so
yeah i zoomed in on that upper upper deck it was not completely sold out but i you know i've not
done a lot of comedy in austin so to sell as many tickets as i did in a theater yeah yeah it felt
very good it was awesome it's a big theater the last time I was there was 2018. I did that with Bert Kreischer.
Here's a picture from me and Brian's show that we did there.
I wish.
So in five years, I guess I'll be doing stadiums like Bert.
I mean, that's what happens.
You're going to have a movie.
Yeah.
And you're going to take your shirt off.
Yeah.
I also did a set at Joe Rogan's Club, The Mothers club the mothership the comedy mothership here's a picture of that yeah i did the little boy room yeah well i thought you just said it sounds kind
of weird but i know they have they have the fat man room and the little boy room which are the
two bombs that were dropped in world war ii oh is it did you know that that's what they were called fat man a little boy okay uh-huh and you know why he chose that beyond just the reason you gave no
because you know he's big into ufos joe rogan is oh why rogan chose i thought you meant why i'm
sorry yeah why joe rumen whoever whoever named that no why joe Why is that? Because he's big into UFOs, and UFO sightings started to really take off after those two atomic bombs were dropped.
Oh, okay.
And the theory is that after that, they got their attention, and they're coming here to Earth to watch us to make sure we don't destroy ourselves.
Oh, well, that's kind of reassuring.
I hate that theory.
They're here to keep an eye on us.
You don't like it at all?
No.
It's kind of reassuring that they're here to keep an eye on us.
You don't like it at all?
No.
We talked about this so many times, but we're always painting aliens like they're just these wise, powerful, intelligent beings.
I think they're just rednecks out there, lost, if they even exist at all.
They're demons, but you know what I mean. Yeah.
Well, it's funny.
They come from billions of miles away away but then they crash a lot
to to yeah they have a lot of mechanical problems that landing's the tough part how was that club
it was great yeah it was really good like if i lived in austin i'd be trying to do that club
every day well i think they all are yeah yeah those comics there i mean it was really great
i mean it was both it was sold
out well before um well before the day of the show there was no not a single comic listed on
the website it just sold out on its own wow and it was great i mean that's a city we didn't mention
last week if you got drafted to a city austin's got a lot of clubs yeah austin's great but it was uh uh 103 to 105 the whole time i was there
even at night it was in the high 90s austin is a hot place well six streets beautiful
yeah it is six street is bizarre because you're walking down the middle of it you're like this
is chaotic but it's not insane and then you look every alleyway you just because you're walking down the middle of it. You're like, this is chaotic, but it's not insane.
And then you look every alleyway.
You just look.
You're like, oh, dude, I'm not walking down there.
It's so crazy.
Uh-huh.
And this time I got to experience a little of the outskirts of Austin.
Which you liked a lot better, I'm guessing.
Yeah.
I went to Terry Black's Barbecue.
I went to a couple of Tex-Mex places.
Had a brisket taco in the morning. And that's what I'm all about. I went to a couple of Tex-Mex places, had a brisket taco in the morning,
and that's what I'm all about. I did pay. Is that a famous barbecue place, Terry Black's
barbecue? I think so. I did pay $36 for three strips of brisket and some coleslaw.
That doesn't surprise me. But it was delicious. Yeah, I'm sure it was good. Dude, I was at the
airport this weekend and I was like, I just need something to eat.
I grabbed a sandwich, one of those prepackaged sandwiches from like, I don't even know what you call it.
Like a little shelf or refrigerated shelf.
Oh, yeah.
And I grabbed that in a water, and I put it on the counter, and the girl goes, that's $30.
What?
And I go, can I see the breakdown of that?
And the sandwich was like $22.
What?
And the water was seven.
What airport is this?
Burbank.
Okay.
Burbank Airport, California.
Yeah.
So I go, I think I'm good on this. I think I'll just suck it up until I get to where I'm going.
I'll just go have some water from the fountain.
That is, yeah.
$20.
It wasn't even like a good, like a $20 sandwich from Terry Black, like a barbecue place.
I at least understand.
Yeah.
And I had three strips and I ate two of them and none of the coleslaw and I was stuffed.
I mean, it was great.
and I was stuffed.
I mean, it was great.
I had, at the Mexican restaurant,
I had queso and had a little ground beef in it
and guacamole.
Oh, yeah.
Mixed it up.
Big time.
By the time, I was full on the queso.
Yeah.
And then I ate the meal.
That's how they get you.
Yeah.
I fill up on chips and salsa
every time I'm at a Mexican restaurant.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
But we ordered a sweet tea
and the guy was like,
we have unsweet tea, you sweeten it yourself. Right? Real condescending. First off, I'm at a Mexican restaurant. Oh, yeah. Yeah. But we ordered a sweet tea, and the guy was like, we have unsweet tea, you sweeten it yourself.
Right?
Real condescending.
First off, I'm like, this is Texas.
I don't know why you're treating us like this.
But even in the North,
they always act like you're some hillbilly,
backwoods redneck because you want sweet tea, right?
Right.
But they have the sugar.
So the only difference is you're putting it in there for me
instead of me doing it.
Yeah, I'm just asking you to mix it up a little bit for me.
Yeah, just do a little something.
Try to earn it before you ask me the question
of whether you want a tip or not.
You know what I mean?
It's like, come on.
I'm at a phase now, if that guy had said,
that's me in that tone of voice,
I probably would have just got up and left.
I know.
Were you tempted to on some level?
Well, I was with such a big group of people that this would be really awkward.
And they were all there like for my show.
So I feel like they would all be like,
well,
do we all need to leave or what?
But it's like,
yeah,
this guy was pretty rude.
Like he asked Drew Harrison ordered like a chicken enchilada and somebody
else had ordered steak.
And the guy was like,
how do you want,
how do you want it cooked?
Chicken enchilada.
He's like, I don't know all the way. know what i mean i don't want raw chicken and the guy goes
so you don't want the steak then he's like i've never wanted this relax a little bit the steak
has never been on the table yeah what are you talking about yeah tough well that's awesome
dude yeah it was great we had a great time well i think you guys are going to
win as far as because i know you had an exciting weekend too um i was in uh um foley alabama all
right did a show of the state yeah did a show at uh snook christian academy um back to school event
for the teachers in service there and they were were great, and we had a good time.
You guys know Foley?
Is that a secret school?
It's not like Snook.
Sounds like a secret, like we snuck in.
I think that's someone's name.
This is the hat I'm wearing for their school.
And I think it's a different Snook.
Snuck?
Yeah.
Snook.
I know Foley because that's where Julio Jonesones played for foley that's right yeah there's a lot of yeah and that's around the mobile area where uh yeah my dad's family's from
yeah in fact didn't they used to live in fairhope yeah they did yeah after i left i visited a friend
who lived in fairhope's beautiful isn't it yeah yeah it's great and they uh they just did
a personality test at the school and they wanted me to take it it's one of those like it's called
who who am i okay i can't wait to hear that well it's not gonna make a lot of sense because
they're colors but i'm a blue if you're if you're listening i'm a blue there's gold orange blue and
green they kept talking about it what does it mean to be a blue yeah how do you know that you're that
well i did this test,
and I brought you guys a test if you ever want to take it.
Color me blue.
Just one, though?
You're a mediator, a caretaker, optimistic.
There's a test if you ever want to take it, Dusty.
I mean, jeez.
Oh, yeah.
You're true romantic, Brian?
Yeah.
You should give him this to me.
Always has a kind word.
I mean, you've been disqualified
already by four well you know off the podcast Brian does always have a kind word I think
I didn't realize I was so brutal on the podcast no here's what you need you need understanding
support empathy yeah harmony acceptance yes. I wish Nate was here. Yes.
Yes.
And you need to be authentic, understood, nurturing, and free to find meaning.
This is very beautiful, dude.
Thank you. How do you find out what the back of mind doesn't have the...
Well, that's just once you're done.
So you're either a blue or a gold, that's it?
We should have given us this before the...
The world's divided into two types of people.
We could have all took the test.
I was going to, but some of us got here last minute, and I just decided to abandon.
Serious.
Well, I mean, you came straight from the airport.
I'm not blaming you.
All right.
I'm just like...
I knew there was paperwork to be done.
I could have done it on the car right here.
What's OGBJ?
That's the colors.
It's a doctor for women.
So you could be orange, I'm guessing, or green or blue or gold.
Yes.
Yes.
And mine was very, very tight.
Did this, does Snook Academy make this, or is this like a scientific thing?
I think it's a scientific thing.
I stuck it right in.
Have you guys ever done an Enneagram?
An Enneagram?
I know that's where you're a number, right?
I've never taken the test, but I've heard people talk about it.
Yeah.
I did take it.
I've also heard that it's demonic, and so I reject it.
That's one reason why I didn't even offer this to you dusty because i didn't think you'd want to do a personality test
i did hear that though and i don't i don't reject i do reject it okay
okay so you was too late you it. I guess we'll move on. No, no, no. Bobby Boucher's mom over here.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's the devil.
Anyway, I had a great time there.
First time ever.
You guys ever done this?
Flown to a gig and flown back the same day?
I've done that once, and it's unbelievable, dude.
I don't think I ever have.
It's an amazing feeling.
It's like it never even happened.
You just kind of pop pop in pop out it is
wild sometimes like i'm sitting around at the house after coming home from a gig and i'm like
just a few hours ago i was across the country yeah i always feel that way too yeah yeah i was
in denver this morning yeah isn't that crazy it is crazy yeah how far we've come i know yeah that
would have been a trip that you might not ever
come back from you probably wouldn't like if you go to den hannah says people back in the day on
the frontier when someone would leave they would stand out and wave to them until they completely
disappeared because they probably never see him yeah and it might take a long time for them to pass over the whatever they pass over horizon
darkness well maybe out of the you don't believe in a horizon out of the frame of vision well come
on what's the horizon i mean well just okay i'm trying to think what a horizon well i think that
you know you just at some point so you can't see them. Oh, because horizon means going over.
Right.
The idea of the horizon is that we pass over.
We're talking about the same thing.
Yeah.
Let's not get into the weeds.
Yeah.
But modern day zoom lenses have proven that when somebody is out of your vision, you're like, I can't see them anymore.
You can zoom in and they come right back.
They're still there walking or driving driving however they're okay however they're going about voting yeah
and if you zoom out far you can see the burj khalifa from here
i don't know what that is the tallest building in the world okay yeah uh where were you eric i was in
uh los angeles for a few days where i got to do a pretty cool moment i got to do a spot at the
comedy store look at that all right legendary comedy store when you are a comedian you start
this is a place everybody talks about fans of comedy talk about it i hung out there like three nights in a
row first time i got there the photographer was like it's your first time here he's like let's
take some pictures you know like a photo shoot of me in the club so it's that's pretty exciting i
did it one time and they didn't take any photos well you gotta you know yeah did you do the main
did you talk to the guy about lenses for a while maybe that's probably what he's like all right i'm
good i just bought in the belly room okay which was awesome too yeah it's the smallest room of the
three but it was sold out packed it's one of those shows where like everybody before me was like
murdering yeah so hard that part of you is like i'm not supposed to be on this show but it went
great that's how i all that's how i felt at jo Rogan's Club. I always feel like any, like the cool clubs, like LA, New York, Chicago.
I'm like, ah, I feel like I'm like, I feel like I'm like a road comic all of a sudden when I'm up in there.
A hundred percent.
I felt that way all weekend.
I felt like I was an outsider and I'm like not really a part of the club.
Everybody was nice and welcoming. So it's
all in my head. Yeah. I never have a problem. I did the main room at this comedy store one time
and I came, I was first, there was no host. I was first on the lineup. I came out, there's a little
step. I tripped and I'm like, I'm open. I already feel like an outsider. And then I tripped and I
pulled it together, though.
It was a hot five minutes.
But it did not start well.
It was a lot of fun for me.
And then yesterday, I headlined Comedy Works in Denver for the first time.
All right.
A lot of folks came out.
Very exciting to see everybody.
That club is like perfect, dude.
Yeah.
Yes, it is.
Have you done the Comedy the comedy works or i have not i mean i i had never done that downtown room you walk out there they're like
right they're almost on stage it feels like they're so close to you yeah and they're just
packed in and it was just like i mean it felt so good i don't know if it felt good to the audience
if it was just a me thing.
I'm hesitant to say.
I was like, it was unbelievable.
The show felt that good.
Yeah, it's so good.
I just did it this year.
It's so good.
Like, the first show I did, I did a weekend.
The first show, I was like, it felt like they were almost, like, laughing at me,
where it was like some joke was happening, where they were laughing at everything I said.
I mean,
I checked my zipper like four times.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I was like,
these jokes are normally not this funny.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
The,
the jokes that are funny are getting last,
but parts that usually don't get a big laugh is like getting a real laugh.
And I'm like,
what's going on here?
Yeah.
Just a great crowd.
Yeah.
Great club.
So it was a really fun weekend.
I'm happy to be back with you two guys,
man.
I'm pumped to be
here you met jesse daniel right i did well i've met him before but he did come to my show in austin
yeah big fan of jesse daniel yeah here you two are right here yeah having a good time at the
paramount theater yeah it's great he lives in austin or just outside and uh he's great how do
you say theater theater you say it that way too? I think so.
Theater.
Theater.
Okay.
Theater.
I get in my head about it.
It's a word I think about as I'm saying it.
Maybe I say theater sometimes too though.
Yeah.
I used to say theater.
Okay.
I put like through an R in there.
Yeah.
And I said that for years and then I got called out on it pretty heavily.
Yeah.
And so now i try to over
compensate theater that's what happens to accents once you become aware of what you're saying and
other people around you aren't saying it like y'all is like that for me i used to say y'all
all the time and then i just kind of became aware that i was saying it and i don't think i say it at
all now yeah and i don't i didn't i don't hate y'all right
you can hardly tell you're southern but i just uh you know what i mean like yeah like hannah
said would say a uh and then she says pasta instead of pasta pasta pasta whoa and now she's
like really become aware that she's saying pasta and And I think we're going to lose it.
And I'm sad about it.
Honey, pasta, pasta.
Pasta.
Pasta.
No, it's pasta, pasta.
I know, but if she's trying to change, she's going to now say pasta.
But yeah, you're right.
It would be pasta, pasta.
Pasta, pasta.
Rastafarian.
Yeah.
Okay.
But I would say Rastafarian.
Yeah, that's how you're supposed to say it.
Oh, she would say Rastafarian. I would say it if you're supposed to say it. I would say it if you said.
Theater.
Theater.
Theater.
Theater.
I went down to Paramount Theater in Austin, Texas.
You ever see old school Tennessee people will say wash instead of wash?
Yes.
Wash.
Wash.
They put an R, like you're going to wash your clothes.
You got to wash my wash my family does that yeah
your family still does yeah yeah some of them do it is wild like like i met someone in charleston
from tennessee and it was a girl probably a year younger than me and she was saying wash
and i i'm from alabama i'm like i almost don't believe i don't believe she did that
i know i believe she did but i don't believe she did it without thinking about it.
Well.
I think, I don't know anything about this girl.
I barely was listening to you talking about it just now.
Is she from a small town?
Yeah, I think so.
I think she thought this will be an interesting thing to do.
If I say wash, wash, and it works because you're still talking about it.
I guess so.
And I met her like 15 years ago.
Yeah, she's still doing that.
Wash.
20 years ago.
Yeah, I just washed my car the other day.
I don't believe she does that.
Anyway, let's move on to these comments.
What about your family?
You think they're making it up?
You think Brian's family is making it up?
No.
They started it.
I don't.
But I'm guessing.
How old is this girl you were talking to?
I don't know.
Let's say 40.
Okay.
At the time, 20.
Okay.
I don't believe any 20-year-old is unironically saying Warsh.
I mean, I have to believe that.
I just don't think it's cool enough to be like making that up.
I think it is.
Okay.
Let's move on to these comments but before we do um i was trying to segue from jesse dino into game time oh you know well since we are so what
what does that have to do with jesse he's a music oh okay oh buying tickets oh yeah i was looking
for something there so okay that was pretty good and then we washed that right away i'm sure it did
i'm sorry, everybody.
Since we are so busy.
I'm just getting rolling here.
The second half of this podcast is going to be unbelievable.
Just give me a minute to let the day come on in, as Dusty says.
Yeah.
Do I say that?
Yeah.
Let the day come on in?
Uh-huh.
That sounds like something I would say one time.
Since we are so busy, the only way we buy tickets is last minute.
And Game Time has great prices on last minute tickets and flash deals.
GameTime is the fast and easy way to buy tickets for all sports, music, comedy, and a thirder near you.
We like the GameTime app because they make it so easy to see the seat views right there on the app.
It is very quick and simple to use.
They are the only ticket sales app that I know of. It's easy to see the seat views right there on the app. It is very quick and simple to use.
They are the only ticket sales app that I know of that.
All these, like it's an ad read.
I won't be able to handle it.
You can't do that.
It's hard to do an ad read and then into the comments. Just read it conversationally.
Listen, I've never.
Read it conversationally.
Listen, I've never... I've never related to an episode more than this one.
I was a beverage vendor for seven years,
and I'm a paint vendor for Home Depot for the last six years,
and I feel like I could sit down and talk for days with Dusty and Greg.
We share way too many of the same opinions and situations.
That was worse. I don't know if same opinions and situations. That was worse.
I don't know if that's better yet.
It's worse.
That was fun though, wasn't it?
Yeah, except for Matt, who was saying some nice things.
Yeah, I didn't process a word of what the comment actually said.
All right, let's get with it.
I've never related to an episode more than this one.
I was a beverage vendor for seven years,
and I'm a paint vendor for Home Depot for the last six years, and I feel like I could sit down and talk for days with Dusty and Greg.
We share way too many of the same opinions and situations. All right. Well, I used to talk to
the paint people all the time in the Home Depot. I love the paint vendors, Valspar, and that's all
I can remember. Sherman Williams? Sherman Williams.
Yeah.
I love the paint people.
They paint people always seem fancier than me.
Are they a different type of people than the pesticide people?
Yeah.
I mean, we're dirtier.
You know what I mean? We're out there stacking fertilizer.
You're getting real work done.
They're making cosmetic changes.
Yeah.
You're trying to keep people.
Well, that's true.
They're coming in with paint strips to be like, look at the new colors that we have.
Embarrassing. Yeah. And they got probably probably they got a lot of them have company cars
very nice and you say the home depot it is the home depot isn't it most most people just say
it's home depot well there is a bit of a mandela effect out there on that some people say it used
to be home depot and now it's the home depot it's the lows though right i think it's the Home Depot. It's the Lowe's though, right? I think it's just Lowe's.
It's like Eagles, the band the Eagles.
Yeah.
Which is my favorite point to make.
I make it all the time and nobody's happy when I say it.
It's just Eagles.
It's just Eagles.
Yeah.
But it's hard to use that.
What's your favorite?
I'm going to go see Eagles later.
Yeah.
It seems like they made a mistake and they're like just trying to cover it now
now we're just eagles i'm going to see eagles concert yeah it sounds crazy yeah anyway all
right jasmine lozano oh i was not looking forward to comment reads with nate missing
but aaron didn't disappoint oh thank you love seeing Dusty and Greg on their first day.
It was adorable and entertaining.
All right.
He did do a good job and I'm sorry,
Jasmine,
that I'm reading them this week.
You're doing a great job now.
You got it down.
We've got a lot more to go.
That was a tough one to be number two though.
Parker Jones.
Can we have Nate walk Aaron through how to properly dismount an episode?
That Aaron Land ending was rough.
Okay.
How do we normally end it?
We love you all.
None of this is lost on us.
There you go.
We love you all.
All right.
Let's see how Brian does it this week.
Yeah, Brian, you're dismounting this time because you're running the ship.
I'll be practicing.
Benny Esquivel. I'll be practicing. Benny Esquivel.
I'll be practicing over here on the side.
Benny Esquivel.
What do you think it is?
Esquivel.
There you go.
Esquivel.
Something like that.
Greg and Dusty may repeat jokes, but at least they add value other than being the butt of the joke.
That'd be a harsh comment if I didn't know Brian was the one putting these together.
I know.
Well, that's 90% of this podcast, so it's a pretty big part.
I guess you do still have to read it, don't you?
Yeah, either way, I'm going to see it.
I mean, some people don't even read comments, but you have to read them and put them together. Yeah, Aaron encouraged me one time some people don't even read comments but you have to read them and put
them together yeah aaron encouraged me one time just don't even read them i told you we're scaling
to the point where we we need to stop looking at stuff yeah i had to stop looking at stuff because
look are the listeners podcast for all things considered are very nice and friendly and they
get what we're doing but it's just it's like being a
comic on stage you see one person with their arms crossed and you focus on them and uh on my own
personal podcast that we're having a good time podcast i did uh a 20 minute rant on the uh
nateland uh facebook group about the people call me out for not eating bacon and then edited it out and never published it.
Really?
Yeah.
But just go ahead and tell us now.
You're in the heat, dude.
Well, I went through a lot of the comments, comment by comment, kind of answering their questions.
Yeah.
Because some people, I don't know, I can't get into it.
But yeah.
It's all love.
It is all love.
It's all love.
It is all love.
The fact that anybody cares whether you, you know what I mean?
Yeah.
It's pretty crazy.
But they want me to do it.
They're like, you better do it though.
Eat that bacon.
I'll get them too.
Don't worry, guys.
I'd say to Benny, besides researching the top, just coming up with the topic, researching the topic, doing all the work, all the comments, all the emails.
Yeah, I agree with you.
Yeah, absolutely.
I mean, I've not done any of these things.
This is all new to me.
Someone replied, truer words have never been spoken.
Oh, wow.
To that comment?
Oh, my gosh.
Was that me?
Maybe my burner account.
All right, Aaron Brawner.
All right.
If a significant portion of your total compensation isn't in the form of bonuses or commissions,
you are not a salesman.
You simply work in sales.
A little technicality there.
Most of these products are established brands that the customer contractually has to carry
in their stores.
Well, yeah, that's true.
You're not necessarily selling it to the store.
You're trying to get the customer to buy your product over the other product. And there is, you know, there's not, well, there is bonuses.
We did get bonuses, but not commissions. And I, yeah, I mean, I'm not out here. I mean, you know,
I don't know the difference in working in sales and being a salesman i didn't go door to door being like you got a lot of weeds out here um but that's a big generational difference where 50 years ago if you
ask people what they do for a living almost everyone would just say i'm a blank oh yeah and
now it's i'm in or i'm involved with. It's like. Yeah. It's interesting.
Yeah.
My official title was seasonal merchandising coordinator.
And then they restructured the company and I became known as a district manager.
There you go.
But the pay was still the same.
Yeah.
So if you're a comedian or I'm in comedy.
Yeah.
A year ago, I'm a comedian. Now I'm in comedy. you're gonna go i'm a comedian now i'm in comedy yeah yeah i mean it's like but the the sales part is like you're trying to get the customer to buy
it but you're also trying to get the store to order more so sure the store already carries it
but i don't know if there's anybody going into a corporation going hey uh i've been making some of
my own pesticides back at the house wondering if
you start stocking them here you know what i mean come on guy and i'm with aaron on this okay
what was aaron's day well i'm with aaron brauner oh okay i forgot aaron brauner yeah uh tyler hodge
Tyler Hodge, Balderdash Bates, has never been more on point with his family's love of Crossville, Tennessee and Mariner's Point.
I'm from northeastern Pennsylvania, but I went to Crossville with my grandparents and brothers every summer as kids.
It's truly paradise for pickleball, putt-putt, and most notably, Nate's favorite sport, golf.
Well, they didn't have pickleball when I went. I think that's a relatively new sport.
Pickleball's been around two months.
I would dominate if we did.
They were just inventing pickles back then.
A paradise for pickles.
Did you play a lot of putt-putt there,
Grona? We did play some putt-putt
and some shuffleboard
and all the other old people stuff that you would imagine.
Dominoes, bingo.
Well, I don't think anybody was really making fun of,
well, maybe we were making fun of Crossville a little bit.
It was just funny that you live so close to Crossville
and you have a, what do we call it last week?
Timeshare.
Timeshare, yeah yeah which i also
did sell a little bit back in the day did you know that no did you mention that when we talked
about timeshare maybe i did did i yeah okay people sent me a clip of but brian doesn't remember so
people sent me a clip of uh parks and recreation where if you watch that show, Jerry...
The old guy.
Yeah. I mean, I guess he's the oldest one
in the group. To me, he's a young
strapping lad. No.
Jerry, he's like, that's his whole character.
He's old, right? Well, he's
the loser, the butt of the jokes.
Okay. He's the fat old guy.
That guy's for sure old.
But he...
He looks like Newt Gingrich, dude.
What are you talking about?
You don't think this is the old guy of the group?
Yeah.
I mean, I'm a little bit older than you guys.
I think I'm an old guy, like 80.
That guy's not much older than I am.
How old is he?
He is...
Oh, I'm looking at...
This is the characters page. Jimim o'hare sorry who i
didn't mean to insult the actor i apologize 61 he's 61 now so that means on parks and rec he was
my age well he was probably in his late 40s when that show started he was playing up at age yeah
yeah they do that anyway on the show he talked about having a time share in muncie indiana
and that show set in ind, so they all laughed.
It was the exact same situation as mine.
Yeah, see, this guy, Tyler Hodge, is from Pennsylvania.
So he's traveling a bit to get to Crossville.
They're going down to Tennessee.
Yeah, he's visiting his grandparents.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Well, we loved it, and we summered there, and back off.
Well, just the fact that you got to go somewhere for the
summer though was pretty impressive i mean we were not summering no i was joking about summering okay
but we took one vacate one big vacation my childhood what was it went to washington dc
of course yeah of course yeah education was some museums yeah
the one big vacation they're like, let's learn something.
How old were you?
Maybe nine or ten.
Not Disney World, not an amusement park.
Washington, D.C.
We did go to Visionland in Birmingham once.
Pretty weak.
I never even heard of it.
I haven't either.
That was like our Six Flags. Okay. We would go even heard of it. I haven't either. You didn't know that was our Six Flags?
Oh, okay.
Really?
We would go to Six Flags.
Visionland, yeah.
You had a Six Flags type place and you'd never even heard of it?
We would go to Six Flags in Georgia.
Okay.
Atlanta, I think, was a bit closer to us than Birmingham.
About an hour and 45 to Atlanta, two hours to Birmingham.
And Six Flags was awesome.
Opelika might be
a good comedy city.
You got,
the direction,
there's a club in Opelika
or in Auburn.
There is a club in Auburn.
There is a club in Auburn.
Crown of Comedy.
Crown of Comedy, yeah.
Yeah.
It's an unfortunate location
for Crown of Comedy.
They bought a spot
that used to be
an old pool hall
that I used to go to.
And then later,
a plasma donation place moved in next to them.
I mean,
they share a wall.
Yeah.
Like plasma donation makes every area look shady.
It sure does.
Yeah.
And then catacorner to that is a discount mattress.
Yeah.
Lee County discount beds or something right there.
Yeah.
So it's like,
it's unfortunate.
It's kind of wedged in between.
I mean,
when it was a pool hall, it was a pretty hot place.
Yeah.
Pretty hot.
It was sketchy, but it's pretty hopping.
And that club's still open?
As far as I know.
I think so.
Yeah.
I've been in a couple of years, but.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's a good time.
All right.
All right.
Matthew Howard.
I really enjoy that the four of you found out that Dusty had a relative who was a literal
The four of you found out that Dusty had a relative who was a literal nobility in England and the high sheriff of London.
But you were more fascinated by what was going on with the people's ties and the picture of his grandfather.
Best podcast ever.
Keep up the good work.
Yeah, I mean, I actually want to know more about my nobility in London.
I'd like to go back to London and try to see if I got got some inheritance how great would it be if you had royal blood in you yeah a high sheriff and you guys probably grew up not being fans of authority yeah well that's true
so something flipped there yeah high sheriff of opelika yeah much different i love it thank you matthew you know you know what my uh my sister's
last name was a howard so maybe i'm related to this guy too laurie peacock
yeah because yeah it's got extra coke maybe well eat peacock peacocky
you ever remember those pea coatsats? You remember those?
Peacoats. I can't remember what they are.
You can remember them.
They're still around.
A girl told me one time she had a peacoat, and her and her boyfriend broke up.
They were drinking.
He got real mad, and he peed on her coat, and it was a peacoat.
Is that why he peed on it?
I don't know.
Did she wash it then?
Is this the same girl?
Not the same girl.
Lori Peacock Coke.
Thank you.
You can't debate animal fights without knowing the St. Louis Zoo has to be in the top five.
They probably house the winners.
Sorry.
Halfway through this, I got real confused.
You can't debate animal fights without knowing the St. Louis Zoo has to be in the top five.
They probably house the winners.
Well, I agree.
I mean, I love it, one, because it was free.
It is free.
But they have good animals there.
It's not sad like the one you said you went to in Little Rock.
We just got Komodo dragons in Nashville.
Yeah.
You see that?
That's big time.
Yeah.
I'm going to go check them them out see what they're all
about yeah i want to take my daughter to the zoo i would like her to see it we've been once yeah
and she was just a little too young to and this is just a couple months ago but to really like
notice anything to be right in front of her because of you and she's looking over here
but just in that couple months time she's changed and you, and she's looking over here. But just in that couple months' time, she's changed, and now she's spotting deer.
I mean, we have a zoo at our house, so we have squirrels and beavers and everything.
I want to take my daughter when she's old enough to be able to take it in, but not too old to have sympathy.
You know what I mean?
What's the sweet spot there?
I think she's in it.
I got to get there quick.
All right, Rebecca Ryan.
This sales episode couldn't help
but remind me of selling
world's finest chocolate
during my grade school years.
Every year,
the world's finest chocolate reps
would come in and get a bunch
of nine to 12 year olds
all pumped up on selling chocolate using the prize catalog as the incentive.
I hated selling it and never did very well.
I lived on the outskirts of what was already a rural town.
So I had about four people on my sales list every year.
This is exactly me.
Everything about it.
We sold world's finest chocolate every year i lived out in the
country very small school she also said i didn't i couldn't put it all in there but her other kids
would take it their parents work and they would oh yeah sell it and stuff and my mom did it every
time for me dominate but she said she never would do that and i mean i never first of all we're selling it
for a dollar a candy bar for a dollar in 1982 when candy bars like 20 cents or something yeah
that's the world's finest that's why they had to call it that world's finest i remember one time
we went to charlie daniel's days in mount juliet he would have a like a well just that a date on
her charlie daniels we walked around i walked around trying to sell world's finest chocolate candy bar and uh it didn't go well
but okay well um well you know you gotta you gotta use what you got all the tools at hand
if you're in sales you know what i mean if your mom can run it up to work we never sold this but
i would sell other things and she would always just get everybody at work to buy it.
I always did well.
It was magazine subscriptions.
Yeah.
It was big in our school.
I think we were doing fruit.
We would get like boxes of fruit.
I remember us having boxes of grapefruit and oranges.
And we would do chocolate, I think.
But I don't know if it was the world's finest.
It was pretty good.
We had to return what we didn't sell.
We never physically had it.
Oh, I thought you,
I was picturing walking around with a box like this.
We did.
No, we never physically had it.
Like they would order it
and we would place the order for them
and then it would come to them, I believe.
We had the physical things
and I'd be like, would you like to buy a candy bar?
I thought you had to buy it first and then then you have to, like, you buy the box.
So you're telling me that Rebecca Ryan was sitting in class.
Oh, yeah.
And some poacher of a chocolate salesman comes in to these kids, 9 and 12-year-olds, and goes, buy all this chocolate for me, and then you go sell it.
Yep.
I don't like that. It's Yep. I don't like that.
It's brilliant.
I don't like that.
It's respected.
It's great for that salesman.
You respect the hustle.
Yeah.
Those are dirtbag tactics.
They are dirtbag.
You return what you don't sell, and so there's no buying ahead of time.
But kids are sitting around with all this chocolate in them.
I know.
It's very tempting.
So you're eating it up, and now your parents are like, ah.
Well, that's true.
Yeah.
I don't like that.
I'm with Rebecca here.
Yeah.
Zach, today was officially my last day at my current job.
I hope you did a two-week notice.
I arrived a little early this morning and was just sitting in my car listening to the episode when Aaron told the etiquette etiquette story and I lost it. The
mental image of him trying to be polite and accept that brutal advice sent me into a total laughing
fit. Unfortunately, this happened while most of my soon to be former coworkers were showing up
to start their work day. Yeah. I mean, that was funny. I i mean it was hard to even contain it when aaron was
telling me while we were there yeah eddie cat the lady was very nice she was she was great
but that's the the worst idea i've ever gotten in my life
let me hear me at you she's selling world's finest chocolate here. Etta Cat. Huh?
Huh?
Jake Jesse.
Or Gessie.
I bet Jesse.
Jake Jesse.
He didn't want to be called JJ.
They were like, do it with a G, though.
They didn't change his last name.
Yeah. Yeah.
All right.
yeah he wouldn't yeah all right am i crazy or does bread toast always sound like he's about to transition to an ad every time he says something lately
i mean i can understand why you would say that you're not crazy but if you are consider better
help it's one of the no i wish Better Help Was a sponsor But they're not
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So big makes the thousand miles per hour so unnoticeable.
for comparison spin yourself
at a rate of
one degree
every four minutes
for 24 hours
and you will have
spun once completely
the earth is doing
the exact same thing
alright
that's a good example
how do we
I wish that there was
something else
that was that big
that spun a thousand miles
an hour
that we can compare it to
yeah
because science is all about
being able to recreate
yeah
and do actual experiments.
It'd be cool if there were eight other planets and a bunch of moons we could look at.
Close enough that we could get to.
Right, right.
If we had devices that could see them from far away.
If we could.
If we could.
That would be very nice.
That would be great.
I don't really get the point of this comment.
No.
Because if I spin slow like that to spin once every 24 hours, then I'm not spinning fast.
So if the earth, it's like the heat index, right?
When they're like, it's this hot, but it feels hotter.
He's like, listen, it's spinning fast, but it doesn't feel that way because it's so big.
But he says it's not spinning fast.
But science tells us it's spinning a thousand miles per hour. Yeah, that's our perception. He said it's not spinning fast. But science tells us it's spinning 1,000 miles per hour.
Yeah, that's our perception.
He said it's relative.
So 1,000 miles per hour is fast to us.
It's not my perception.
It's to some people's perception, 1,000 miles per hour.
But 1,000 miles per hour is fast.
Not if you're as big as the earth.
But how is that?
That's what I'm saying, though.
It's like fast is fast.
It doesn't feel slower because you're big. as the earth but how how was that that's what i'm saying though it's like fast is fast you don't get
it doesn't feel slower because you're big but i'm i think you guys would agree maybe
look at me does it you don't think an ant thinks i'm a pretty fast walker but i bet you guys don't
think i'm a fast walker you're walking this whatever the speed is you're walking is still
the speed you're walking yeah that's right he says it's all relative to what you're walking this whatever the speed is you're walking is still the speed you're
walking yeah that's right he says it's all relative to what you're talking about it's it's it's not
real it's like the speed is the speed no matter what so whether you think it's fast or slow is
is your own opinion there you go that's that's right right but but but the point is like we
should be able to feel something going that fast like if you're walking five miles per hour to the ant the ant
is like wow five miles per hour that's really fast i can't go that fast right so um you know
so to that ant uh you know but it's you're still going five miles per hour no matter what
it's not uh you know what i mean does that make sense not really i don't i don't understand what's
happening thousand miles per hour is 1,000 miles per hour.
Yeah.
Yeah.
We're not arguing that.
I'm back on.
I guess we're just debating whether.
I mean, it's not doing that, so it's easy.
You know what I mean?
It's just kind of hanging out.
Not even hanging, really.
Just resting.
But let me ask you this, and I know I probably shouldn't even get off on this,
but other planets in the solar system,
do you think they're out there or do some people think they're out there?
Some people do.
Do some people think they're not?
Yeah.
Some people do think they're not.
Yeah.
Cause you can see them through a telescope.
Well,
have you,
have you pulled up images on the internet of people actually like zooming in
on these planets and not the NASA images?
I saw, I took a cosmology class in college and I saw the planets through a telescope.
Was it your own telescope?
I have a telescope and I can see Saturn.
So when you zoom in on Saturn, it looks just like they show you on the internet?
It sure does, man.
You can see the rings.
I zoomed in on Jupiter and you can see the red the red spot you saw it from a school telescope so who knows
what's mine mine's not big powerful enough to i can see it but i can't zoom in on it what's it
look like when you see it i can see the ring is very small it's very faint but i can see a ring
and i can see i can't prove their wish i know we would talk about this i would have brought some
some videos i mean now again you know these are somebody else's videos i don't know but i've
seen right like zooming in on stars i mean it's wild they're like they're like changing all the
time and it looks it's so wild it doesn't look at all like the sun you know we're a lot closer to
right but i can't but but the sun's not doing this thing.
It doesn't change everything about it because it's closer.
I think we got a different view of it.
Yeah, we would.
Yeah, I mean, but I wish I had known we would talk about this.
I would have brought these next time.
Me too.
But I think planets are off camera.
I'm going to show it to you.
Yeah, we'll talk about it
When we stop rolling
We'll really get into it
Well today we are talking about
School
It's back to school this week here
Did that go well?
I think it's still picking up
I don't think we've really hit our stride yet
But I think within the next 10 minutes It'll be like i'll look around and be like this is actually going pretty good okay
but we're done with the comments yes you're asking about the comments specifically yeah
yeah they go well yeah i think i don't read them a lot oh you just meant you're reading
or just all together the flow i thought you did a good job man yeah i appreciate that
but uh today we're talking about school it's back to school this week here in at least Nashville.
And I think pretty much everywhere in the country, people go back to school in August.
I think when I was in school, we would start after Labor Day.
That was kind of the-
Yeah.
Like maybe-
I think that's how it was for me too.
It could have been like the Tuesday, like literally the day after Labor Day.
I don't remember, but Laura was telling us about how now they're here considered year round schools.
It's not that different, but they do start earlier because they have fall break and a spring break.
We never had a fall break.
We never had a fall break and a spring break we never had a fall break we never had a fall break growing up well there's a lot of data to suggest that a better model would be to eliminate summer
vacation altogether and just have year-round school i think i'd prefer that and you just
have in this and you have another like fall break another like week break somewhere in there but
taking two months off some you know you don't retain a lot of what
you learn there's a lot of data that says all the kids will be better off what do you think about
that i don't know i think there's so much useless stuff that goes on in school anyway i just think
about the stuff you think the lack of retention is good yeah i mean we do need to get a little
forget some of this yeah well it's like i
think we should like be learning really practical things like so that when we get out of school we
know how to do stuff like people don't know how to pay bills they don't know how to balance
checkbooks they don't know how to do their taxes they don't i think we should be learning all this
stuff i think you should know how to cook basic food for yourself i mean and then we come out very productive humans
instead of being like we just come out ready to go to college we're like let's get in debt now
there are some classes in high school that do some of that home back but they're they're classes
they're electives that you can they are i think we should folk like it's like uh you know like
calculus was a class that you could take in my and it's like uh we you know it's like, you know, like calculus was a class that you could take. And it's like, you know, it's like, if you want to get into math later on, like, get into it in college.
Oh, I thought you meant like once you retire.
No, it's like.
Then take up a hobby.
Yeah, it's like, I don't need calculus in high school.
Like, let's go algebra.
Let's do algebra one.
But here's, do you think the kid that wants to take calculus is also the kid that needs to take a class on how to button a shirt?
Well, button a shirt, I mean, that's a stretch.
If he doesn't know how to button a shirt, then the answer is yes.
But I don't, I think these are classes that people need to be taken where they learn.
Like we took a sewing class.
It was an elective.
We took something, but you know, I know how to sew. You took sewing as an elective? Yeah. Well, I don sewing class. It was an elective. We took something, but I know how to sew.
You took sewing as an elective?
Yeah.
Well, I don't know.
It was middle school.
So it was a kind of a required thing.
Really?
I know.
So I know how to sew with a needle and thread.
I learned to use a sewing machine.
I haven't done that in a long time.
So I don't know if I could do it, but.
That's pretty cool.
Yeah.
And I think, you know, auto.
But can you do calculus?
Not at, I don't even know what calculus is, to be honest with you.
Yeah, I barely.
Let's go over like where we went.
Like mine's pretty simple.
I was first through eighth grade at the same school.
It was the smallest school in the county.
First through eight?
Yeah, I didn't go to kindergarten.
Okay.
First through eighth grade at the same school.
And then I went from the smallest school in the county to the biggest school in the county in high school.
And so I was only at two schools before college when you got
to the big school like because this happened to my mom too was that a real adjustment oh yeah but
it was great because i was with the same kids for eight years and there's just a few of us yeah and
then you get to high school and you're a freshman. You see the senior girls.
You're like, they're women.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
And they seem so mature and just put together.
And yeah, it was a huge adjustment.
It was so nice, though, to be around other kids that you hadn't been around all the time, though.
Right.
And doing stuff.
I was hot.
I mean, there's a.
Whoa. I mean, that's probably. That's a good look though i'm gonna be honest it is a good look you got kind of the dusty
sleigh glasses yeah yeah that's why you think it's a good look okay i think it's a good look i mean
you got a uh head hair what is that yeah i mean there's yeah i like it i'm into is that a lacoste
shirt it could be it could be that's be. That's a good call on that.
I was third grade, maybe.
I don't know.
I mean, your hair looks good.
You got a good head of hair, man.
Yeah, yeah.
I've had a haircut like that.
I had a haircut like that most of my life.
Is that kind of Alabama bangs?
I would say like Alabama swoop.
Yeah, the Alabama swoop.
Alabama swoop.
Okay.
So that's pretty much, I mean.
Dang, that's a good look.
Public schools?
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
Were there like, was there ever talk,
there were like Christian schools or private schools
that you would have maybe gone to or was it?
There is one in Lebanon that, I mean, it's still there,
but I don't ever remember any talk about it.
I just don't think we could afford it.
Yeah.
but I don't ever remember any talk about it.
I just don't think we could afford it.
Yeah.
So, and I mean, I know you went to private Christian school.
I see advantages and disadvantages.
I mean, my daughter now, I'll be considering for her in a few years,
where to send her to school.
And there are some advantages to public school, but.
What are the advantages?
I feel like you're around a more diverse group of people. I may be wrong because I wasn't in private school, but... What are the advantages? I feel like you're around a more diverse group of people.
I may be wrong because I wasn't in private school,
but I feel like you're...
Diverse in what way?
Well, in race and economics
and just different, you know,
just not everyone's maybe
as similar as you.
I may be wrong,
but that's how I feel.
There's probably some truth to that.
I think it depends a lot on the school. Like I got stabbed in eighth grade that's how I feel. There's probably some truth to that.
I think it depends a lot on the school.
Like I got stabbed in eighth grade.
Did you get stabbed? That's the kind of diversity.
I got punched in the bathroom,
busted my eye.
And luckily,
you could do your own stitches
after you got stabbed.
Yeah, that's true.
Because I learned.
Yes, because I learned things.
I had to go to a nurse,
and they had to do it.
My locker got broken into a lot.
I lost a lot of money. You know what I mean? How many schools did you go to growing up? Well, I was just talking
about this the other day. It was weird for me because some schools were being built. In Opelika,
I went to a school called Carver from kindergarten and first grade. And then that new school was
being built. So I went to another school called Brown while that one was being
finished. And then I went, I was the first class at Southview primary. So I did second grade there.
And then I did third grade at a school called Martin third, fourth, and fifth, which would
later be called North side. And then I went to middle school, uh, Opelika middle school uh opelika middle school for 6 7 8 and then high school ohs uh 9 10 11 12 damn
that's a lot yeah you jumped around a lot like a military family that's what i was about to say
all in the same town so all these primary and elementary schools we all came together in middle
school so it was similar to that so you had friends that made all these jumps with you yes
okay so you had friends that you went these jumps with you. Yes. Okay.
So you had friends that you went from kindergarten all the way through high school.
Absolutely.
Matter of fact, the girl who told me that her boyfriend peed on her peacoat, we were in kindergarten together. Went all the way through school together.
Wow.
Yeah.
Such a huge chunk of your life in the same room with another person.
Yeah.
Now, she wasn't in every class with me, but we made the journey.
Yeah.
I mean,
you were five when you started.
Yeah.
Her last name was,
her name was Lindsay Savage.
So Savage and Slay,
we were always like,
you know,
when your last names are close,
you're always like,
kind of like in the same home room together and stuff like that.
A lot of the S's.
Yeah.
You were taking an elective in junior high
yeah i don't know if they were called electives but they were like just you know you'd be you'd
have all your regular classes and then you had it's elective in that like you decided whether
you went to school that day or not that is true that is true yeah i got in home ec i did chorus
you know stuff like that i did a little chorus thing. I just realized we were singing God Bless the USA by Lee Greenwood in middle school.
Oh, no, maybe elementary school.
And I looked at the dates, and that song was brand new at that time.
Wow.
Because I was like, man, this song must be way older.
But it was brand new.
I thought it came out after 9-11.
Had a resurgence. Had a bit of a resurgence. Yes, it did. new i thought it came out after 9-11 had a resurgence
had a bit of a research yes it did i remember hearing it all over after that like i met lee
greenwood a couple of times and it's like you don't hear other lee greenwood songs you don't
need another yeah you've got the song yes but i remember when that song came out and i knew who
lee greenwood was because he had stuff right he has he has a few albums but
it's like i mean when that song when you got that song yeah career changes yeah now we're all 10
years well you and i are 20 years apart but we're 10 years different so i graduated high school in
1990 did you graduate in 2000 2000 2010 all right i'm the class of the new millennium here. Me.
Oh.
You know?
Yeah.
What does that mean?
Well, first graduating class of 2000, you know, the year 2000. I think it'd be 2001.
Well, that was the argument that 2001 people are making.
But we were the first class to not use 19, you know?
Uh-huh.
Oh, yeah.
The first 20.
Okay.
All the 2001 kids made that argument.
Well, we were the first because you don't start
with zero.
You start with one.
Yeah.
And I get it, but.
Those are the nerds.
Yeah, exactly.
It's like, you know
what we mean.
Exactly.
I think I,
my first grade year,
I think was 1978, 79.
That was a good year.
It was a good year.
There's a lot going on.
Yeah, there was a lot
of happening back then,
but so.
Oh, look here.
Here we go. This is. Yeah, there was a lot happening back then. So, oh, look here. Here we go.
This is a St. Bede gray basketball team.
Look how happy you are.
I'm pretty excited, man.
I'm excited to be playing hoops.
And a few poinsettias in your back.
Yeah, in front of a weird kind of mural of the Virgin Mary.
How many schools did you go to, Aaron?
I went to the same for i went to catholic
school my entire life yeah kindergarten through college which is pretty crazy but i went to saint
bead k through six and then the uh it was a feeder school for montgomery catholic middle school and
then that fed right into catholic high school and then I moved in the middle of high school to Nashville.
Was that hard?
It was pretty hard.
I've been going like,
you're talking about,
I've been going to school with the same kids,
kindergarten through 10th grade.
Yeah.
And those are all the people in my life.
And then we all moved.
Were you cool at the new school?
Did you fit right in or was it hard?
Like,
obviously it was hard.
We just asked you that question.
You said,
yes,
it's hard,
but I mean, in class. In class or was it hard? Obviously, it was hard. We just asked you that question. You said, yes, it's hard. But I mean, in class.
In class, was I cool?
I don't know if I could be cool in class.
I wasn't a class clown.
I wasn't doing that.
You didn't make a lot of jokes?
I think I was probably thinking funny stuff.
I made a lot of jokes.
You made a lot of jokes?
Oh, yeah.
Did you make a lot of jokes?
Well, I wasn't the class clown.
I would say stuff under my breath to my friends to make them laugh. Oh, yeah. Most comedians aren't the class clown. I would say stuff under my breath to my friends to make them laugh.
But most comedians aren't the class clown.
I had no concept for getting an education.
I was like, I'm just here because they're making me come.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
Did you ever have first day of school nerves or excitement?
Yeah, every time.
I mean, yeah, there's always some nerves.
But also always like, I don't want to go back to school.
I'm enjoying the summer break.
Oh, look at this.
Oh, yeah.
Wow.
This is the St. Bede gold team.
This is how I used to pose in every picture right here.
Is it because football players would never smile?
That's a good look for you.
Thanks, dude.
Just a frown.
Almost a little bit of a flat top going on here.
You're like you almost had like a
military cut that you let grow out a little bit.
That's like the same hair I have right now.
I've always had that weird widow's pink hair.
It feels a little more
flat top-ish in this picture.
I think it's because my mom was cutting
my hair.
They didn't put a whole lot of thought into
the shape of it or anything.
What about that guy next to you?
Are you still in contact with that?
That's Wallace Harvey.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I know Wallace really well, actually.
So which, which tough picture of him, which kid did not start?
There's six of you there.
I don't.
Oh, I don't know.
Who wrote the bitch?
I don't.
Not the girl.
I don't know.
That's, that's an interesting question.
I don't remember a whole lot about this.
I like that. You got to keep the ball though. Got it between my feet. Yeah. That's an interesting question. I don't remember a whole lot about this team. I like that you got to keep the ball, though.
Mm-hmm.
Got it between my feet.
Yeah, you're a real star.
Were you guys good?
I don't know.
This does not look like a good basketball team.
Your friend who's having the rough picture there,
he's the best player.
He looks like the best player on the team.
What about this team?
This is the team from the next year.
All right.
Well, that's a lot different.
You guys have grown.
Yeah, you look like you've aged a lot in one year here.
I remember all these kids, man.
What happened to the girl?
The girl got kicked off?
Yeah, we were like, we're trying to win some games.
You need to get out of here.
How about that?
Yeah.
And your other buddy, Walter, or or whatever he's off the team too
wallace yeah well he was a grade above me so i think he's in a different league now that i've
moved up a year so these are fun to look at i hadn't looked at these pictures in a long time
but no we were not a basketball school who's on the wall back there uh that's mary okay she's a
mother of jesus and uh in the catholic church
they like her a lot gotcha they do like her a lot what
they love her yeah they talk about her they're like you know i'm like that's not even really
a main character and they really get into, she's a supporting actress. Yeah.
Probably.
Yeah.
Oscar.
Oscar nom.
I mean, she plays a big role.
That's what I'm saying.
Yeah.
Or she's probably lead actress.
If the Bible were a movie, she'd be nominated lead actress, I think.
I'm watching.
Ruth. They wrote a whole'm watching Ruth.
They wrote a whole book after Ruth.
They were trying to be nice.
Got the woman in here.
How about old men names?
Let's go.
Ruth of bone.
I'm watching.
Who talks about Ruth?
I was talking about her a lot.
Yeah.
Have you really?
Well,
my wife,
tell me one thing.
Oh, that's your wife's name.
Okay. Was she named after the book of Ruth? Yeah. Okay. All right. I'll stop talking about it. No, I mean, yeah have you really well my wife tell me one thing oh that's your wife's name okay
was she named after
the book of Ruth
yeah
okay
all right
I'll stop talking about it
no I mean
to your point
so her brothers are
John and Stephen
there's a million
male biblical names
there's not Stephen
in the Bible
yeah
first Christian martyr
okay
and then for girls
you're like
Mary
yeah
a lot of Mary
and okay I guess we'll go with ruth
you can totally do that esther mary magdalene that's still mary so i'm watching uh you guys
know this show the chosen i've heard of it i've heard of it yeah i've heard you i've heard you
and nate talk about it on the podcast i i just started it so i didn't know anything about it
um he mentioned it on rogan i think oh that's where he talked about it yeah yeah i just started it, so I didn't know anything about it. He'd mentioned it on Rogan, I think.
Oh, that's where he talked about it.
Yeah.
Yeah. I just started it, and I had a hard time getting into it because they create-
Because you know how it ends.
Well, they create backstories for these biblical characters-
Nice.
That aren't in the Bible.
A little artistic license.
I like it.
So I had a hard time, you know.
I won't watch it.
Because of that?
Just because I don't like any of that stuff when they create, you know, because they create what Jesus looks like.
We're not supposed to do that.
Would you watch a movie in the first person from Jesus' perspective?
So you never see him.
Oh, maybe.
Maybe.
That's interesting. Like a body cam like a body that's interesting like if jesus had body cam footage we're coming in body cam footage of
the crucifixion yeah would be tough so you didn't say the passion of the christ no yeah for the same
reason well i didn't see that one because they talk about you know the whole uh scene of what happens to
jesus and i'm like i don't want to see that yeah it seems too brutal to me i don't want to watch
but you'll read about it yeah but god forbid somebody put it on film well they're allowed
to do it i just don't want to say okay like ufc for instance right like i'm glad it exists people
love it but i don't want to watch people get beat up like that.
I can't handle it.
Yeah, that's fair.
Even fictional stuff, for the most part, it's okay.
Actually, I like Quentin Tarantino the most because most of his movies, it seems so wild.
And it's so over the top.
That it seems fictional because it's like Reservoir Dogs, I can't handle. But the others are so over the top that it seems fictional because it's like reservoir dogs i
can't handle but the others are so over the top that it's like this is silly yeah but like saving
private ryan like war movies yeah too realistic too it's very painful uh i hate it uh-huh well
anyway the chosen i had some of the same issues because they're creating these stories of these
people that you know they take an artistic license.
But now we're getting into the parts that are in the Bible.
And so I'm starting to get on board with it.
All right.
Pretty good.
Well, I hear nothing but good things.
People love it.
People are always telling me to watch.
And I know all the stories in the Bible.
I've read them so many times. It's nice now to even do a pretend thinking about what they look like or
putting some personality to the characters.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, yeah, sure.
Now, to your point, Jesus does some stuff.
Like, they humanize him so much.
I'm like, I don't know.
Would Jesus really hit his thumb hammering or whatever?
Probably not.
Oh, yeah, he would.
He probably would, but it's just, it's hard to think of him that way.
I don't think Jesus misses.
He hits his thumb if he wants to.
I don't know.
That's fair.
So there's some of that that's already going to, I don't even know how we got off to that.
Oh, yeah, I asked you about the picture on the wall.
Oh, yeah.
That spiral.
But Mary Magdalene is a big role in the show. That's nice. Oh yeah. That spiral. But Mary Magdalene is a, is a big role in, in the show.
That's nice.
So anyway.
So what about going to school for the first time?
Would you guys like,
you had like a whole going to the,
where would you go shop?
Yeah.
That's what I was about to ask.
Oh,
was it?
Yeah.
All right.
Where would you go shop for your,
for your new clothes?
Like,
what'd you like to get?
Well,
my older brother's dresser.
Okay.
That's where I got all my clothes from.
What kind of stuff would he have?
We had school uniforms.
I always had school uniforms.
That makes it easy.
I actually like that.
Well, now it's all in Alabama.
It's all the public schools have uniforms.
Really?
Most of them.
At least in Montgomery County.
I like a school uniform thing because-
I'm surprised.
Well, I like to get wild with it, but yeah, when you don't have a lot of money, you end up feeling self-conscious about your clothes that you're wearing to school.
That's a big part of the reasoning is that it just alienates kids from each other.
And it causes all kinds of problems.
Yeah.
It's like Tommy Hilfiger was the thing when I was growing up.
Right?
And it's like, I was never going to get Tommy Hilfiger. Right? And it's like- Yeah. You got Timmy Hilfiger was the thing when I was growing up, right? And it's like, I was never going to get Tommy Hilfiger, right?
And it's like-
Yeah, you got Timmy Hilfiger.
Yeah.
With some off brand.
But I'd be wearing like Duckhead sometimes-
Bugle Boy.
Or Bugle Boy or, you know, I really pleaded to not get clothes at Walmart.
That was my thing.
I was like, anything.
We'll go to Sears.
We go to K-Mart.
We go to K-Fers.
Well, not K-Mart. We got to stay-Fers. Well, not K-Mart.
We got to stay away from those.
But, you know, and so it was hard.
So I ended up getting more creative with what I would wear, you know.
And so I think it, you know, created some creativity.
But it would have been nice to just wake up and put the same thing on.
Absolutely.
Every day.
And knowing that your friends are all going to be wearing the same thing.
Yes.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I think it annoyed me.
We'd have dress down days at school,
you know,
usually it was like a fundraiser. Like you bring $2 in and you get to dress down.
So the kids that got no money still wearing the uniform.
Yeah.
We still found ways to alienate the kids,
you know?
But looking back,
it's like,
I,
I didn't mind the uniforms at all they're
probably a good thing yeah you know yeah i can see that i don't think in elementary school i was even
thinking about like just whatever my mom bought that's probably what i wore but by high school
lebanon the options were pretty limited and uh we had one clothing store that opened goodies.
I remember goodies.
And to us, that was high fashion.
Yeah.
So you'd buy a nice shirt from there and then go to school the next week or the first day of school.
And there'd be three different guys wearing the same shirt.
Oh, yeah.
That's the problem.
Yeah. And you get some new clothes and it's like, well, there's still five days in a week.
Yeah.
So you're like, you're trying to rotate them out.
Well, there's still five days in a week.
Yeah. So you're like, you're trying to rotate them out.
Well, I told a story on here before you joined us, Dusty, that my first day of my senior year in high school, I wore a New Kids on the Block shirt to school because somehow I'd missed it.
That's not cool.
Was it a fresh one?
I'd just been to their concert.
Oh, no.
So this is as fresh as you can get.
Almost like a faded one. You could get away with being like, this is my sister's. I'm wearing it concert. Oh, no. So this is as fresh as you can get. Almost like a faded one.
You could get away with being like, this is my sister's.
I'm wearing it ironically.
Aaron said that, I think, before.
I said, once you realize everybody's making fun of it, just go, yeah, isn't it hilarious that I'm wearing this?
Yeah.
That's all it would take.
That's how cool I am.
I should have done that, but I did not.
Yeah, I had a couple.
I had a Toby Keith shirt I remember wearing.
I think I wore it like one time.
Didn't feel it.
Nobody was making fun of Toby Keith, but it just felt it. I think I wore it like one time. Didn't feel it. Nobody was making fun of Toby Keith,
but it just felt weird.
What was the shirt?
It was big dog or something.
Dog.
Oh yeah. There was a big dog.
There was a,
there was some other stuff,
but there was some like big dog.
Like if you can't hang with a big dog,
stay on the porch.
Yeah.
It was stuff like that.
I remember those shirts.
Those were big dress down days.
People coming with the big dog shirts on that was after my time i remember you wanted something weird okay
well that's why it's like any of those shirts i could think to bring up are all inappropriate
because you go to like the you go down to panama city and go to one of those uh beach stores and
they had all the i had a lot of shirts like that.
I would get in trouble all the time about shirts.
They're all like Spencer's type stuff.
Yeah.
Like, like, you know, not airbrush, but like, you know, I can't even describe some of the things that I had.
I shouldn't have been wearing them.
Something crass.
Yeah.
Yes.
But nobody was, nobody was monitoring what I was wearing.
By the time I got to high school, I just was, you school, I was getting myself dressed and heading out. Even
in earlier school, my mom worked third shift.
Most of the time, I'd catch the bus before
she even got home.
Nobody knew what I was wearing. Did you guys ride the bus to school?
I never did, no.
Your dad was driving.
My parents worked at the school, or I had
older siblings that would
drive me.
In Alabama, I don't even think we had the option
to take a bus for a private private small private catholic school they don't have busing you know
i rode the bus usually about half and half i'd ride the bus to school my mom would pick me up
or the other way around i'd ride she'd take me to school i'd ride it home how do you coordinate
stuff like that back then? No cell phone.
I guess you just, you know, they would give you just the, you know, my mom would just be like, I'm going to pick you up.
You know, or, or I guess you might call the school and say, Hey, let Dusty know I'll be picking him up today or let Dusty know to ride the bus.
Okay.
But it's a lot of say, tell this to this person.
Oh yeah.
It's a lot of message too't remember message too i think it
was mostly just they tell you that morning and that's the plan but do you remember there being
a lot of like problems caused by this lack of communication or were you even thinking about
it at all i don't think there was ever problems from i mean maybe one or two i got i got banned
for the bus for a little while one time for throwing pencils. But.
That didn't have anything to do with no cell phones.
No, that was only like a week, too.
I got to come back.
That was nice.
I knew I wasn't malicious.
I think school bus drivers have one of the most stressful jobs out there.
Dealing with all those kids and driving this huge, gigantic vehicle.
Yeah, and the kids aren't even wearing seatbelts.
No, and they're just going crazy.
No seatbelts at all.
I threw up on the school bus one time.
And there was that.
It was three to a seat, and I was middle.
And it hit the seat in front of us.
It splattered. It went all over the other kids.
I remember the kid digging throw up out of the crease of his bag with a pencil.
Being like, you're going to buy me a new bag. And I'm i'm like well i'm about to get off at a trailer park here so
you just hold your breath there buddy you set that laptop up yeah uh what'd you throw up from
just like general being a kid yeah i mean food was never good knows? I mean, the food at the school was always crap.
I mean, it was.
Yeah, I was going to ask you, do you take your lunch or do you do cafeteria food?
I do about half, not half and half.
I take my lunch sometimes.
But, you know.
That's probably about 10% of the time I'd buy lunch.
I had a sack lunch most of the time.
Did you ever have a lunchbox?
Never really a lunchbox.
It was just a brown paper bag. I had a lunchbox as a kid. Did you ever have a lunchbox? Never really a lunchbox. It was just a brown paper bag.
I had a lunchbox as a kid.
Do you remember what it was?
I think I had a G.I. Joe and a He-Man.
Those are my favorite two cartoons.
I had Super Friends and Dukes of Hazzard.
Oh, man.
Oh, yeah.
I would have beat y'all up in L.A.
If you said that.
What are you talking about?
Those are cool.
They were cool back then.
I had a little G.I. Joe lunchbox with a little G.I. Joe thermos inside that sometimes you put soup in there.
It's not cool to like stuff, dude.
Oh.
I'm just kidding.
We were okay liking things back then.
That might be a different generation of this change.
It's not cool to care, dude.
As you got older, for sure it wasn't.
Yeah, I'm just kidding.
For sure, though, when you got older, it was like you wear one strap of the backpack and you'd rather give yourself back problems than just wear it correctly
yeah because it looks so cool to just carry one yeah yeah the movie 21 jump street they
had to talk about that very funny oh yeah okay yeah but that was true i mean hannah would talk
about you know growing up in canada the cool thing was to not wear coats.
Like if you were like cool, you would just be freezing to death.
I think that's what's going on now.
Kids or at least boys will wear shorts to school when it's 10 degrees outside.
I used to do that.
I get that.
I would pride myself.
No, I don't need a jacket and I'm wearing shorts.
I thought you had a school uniform.
Flip flops.
I'm talking about just like in general. Oh, yeah don't need a jacket, and I'm wearing shorts. I thought you had a school uniform. Flip-flops. I'm talking about just in general.
Oh, yeah.
Weekends.
What about using the bathroom at school?
Like number two.
Would you do it?
I never did it.
I don't think I ever did it a single time my whole career of high school.
I don't think I did either.
I was so terrified.
Dude, in high school, you're looking for, yeah, I'll go take a break.
I'd rather check out of school.
High school is like a job at an office.
Yeah, I'm going to go use the bathroom.
Are you playing a horse with no name?
Yeah.
I never would do it.
Elementary school, I bet I was too scared to do that.
But high school, it's like, I'm running the show now.
I don't care.
Yeah.
Let them in.
I'm taking care of business.
I was not for it.
I like to be very discreet about my...
We had a poop bandit
at my high school.
Ever talk about that?
No.
We had a guy who
was vandalizing the bathrooms
with...
Oh, gross.
Yeah.
Hence the name,
the poop bandit.
That's disgusting.
You want to fess up right now?
Yeah.
It was... It's not me.
And I don't know who it was, but it was a thing for a while.
That's disgusting.
I agree.
Now, did you guys do recess or was that banned by the time you got in school?
I did recess in primary school, but it was done by elementary school.
Primary was kindergarten, first, second. I don't think we had it after that i think middle school we had uh little breaks but it
wasn't called a recess it was like a 15 minute break or something k through six we had legit
play kickball dodgeball that we had pe and i guess that's probably what recess was for us
we have when you're younger you have just like a general go out in the playground, do whatever.
First second, kindergarten, first second, we had that.
I don't remember it after that.
You don't think in third grade you had recess?
I don't think so.
Wow.
I think it was PE.
So you didn't have recess.
You're learning how to sew.
Did you go to school at a sweatshop?
That's what it feels like.
It sounds like it, yeah.
It does sound like it.
Yeah.
We had portables. So in a way, I did live in a trailer for a That's what it feels like. It sounds like it, yeah. It does sound like it. We had portables.
So, in a way,
I did live in a trailer
for a while.
You guys know what portables are?
No.
I had art in a portable.
Basically,
if they didn't have enough classrooms,
they would bring in...
Oh, it was like a trailer.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
We had some portables.
I took some classes in portables.
I'd never heard them called that.
Just called them trailers?
We just called it, yeah,
just trailers.
I just called it art class.
There's enough trailers around
that we didn't even think it was weird.
We were complaining.
Dusty's like, this is nice.
Yeah, this is a good trailer, honestly.
This is a double wide?
Yeah.
Did you do a lot of after school activities?
Just sports.
All the way through?
Yeah, all the way through.
I did some sports,
but for the most part, I was heading on to the house.
I didn't do a lot of activities.
Did you do campus life or anything?
I did campus life.
Yeah.
Matter of fact, I did.
You know what?
The campus life people from Orlando came to see me not long ago, and I've been wanting to wear that shirt in here.
Campus life was like a Christian kind of after school thing.
And in high school, I was really into campus life.
I loved it. I became was really into campus life. I loved it.
I became a leader at campus life.
Really?
And then I started throwing a lot of parties
and I got demoted from leader.
Oh.
They didn't kick me out of campus life,
but they were like,
we really can't have you being a leader
and throw a lot of parties.
I go, well.
This is in high school?
Yeah.
I love campus life.
Yeah.
Throwing ragers at the trailer.
Seventh grade. Yeah. See,ragers of the trailer. Seventh grade.
Yeah.
See, by high school, by, by 10th grade, we had moved out of the trailer.
And so 10th grade, I lived in a house just a mile in front of the school.
So, um, you know, so I would walk to school a lot before I got a license and, uh, it was great.
It was so easy to invite people.
I might just go down this road.
Yeah.
Last house on the right.
You'll hear it.
We're going to be partying.
You'll hear it.
Follow the music.
I'm the campus life leader.
Senior year was hot for me.
I really made some waves by senior year.
Really?
Senior year of high school?
Yeah.
You kind of came into your own?
Yeah, it was hot.
Let your hair down.
Yeah.
You know?
You're popular?
Yeah, it was a hot year for me.
I don't like to use the word popular,
but I was cool. You know what I mean? You were popular? Yeah, it was a hot year for me. I don't like to use the word popular, but I was cool.
You know what I mean?
Popular seems more douchey.
I was cool.
People liked me.
Yeah.
You were a well-liked guy.
Yeah.
That's fair to say.
Yeah.
Yeah.
What about you, Brian?
Well-liked?
Yeah.
I mean, I think I was liked.
Yeah.
I wasn't popular.
But were there, when you think of high school, were like that's the popular group or whatever there was and i i can't say that i
was in that group maybe i was in the minor leagues of that group i knew some people
in the farm you know i do feel like my senior year was by far the most fun year because i mean
i guess that's true for most people but there's something about when you're the oldest ones, you just have a different attitude.
You have to wait four years to run this place.
Ninth grade was really my worst year, I think, just in the way that I, and I don't think it had necessarily anything to do with changing schools to high school, but it was just like, that's the year I felt the most insecure, you know, in my life.
So it was a real turnaround for my senior year.
Well, that's probably true for freshman years. Maybe so probably so i mean i wasn't getting picked on or anything i just
was like you're going through some changes personally at that time yes yes you know there's
a lot going on there is a lot going on uh i get that yeah i don't know if ninth grade i didn't
peak in ninth grade either you know i mean the size difference some of the kids there's yeah
it's men and kids there's
freshmen in high school that haven't hit puberty yet and you're in the same locker room with with
grown men now yeah i remember there was a guy i don't know if he was in 11th grade or 12th grade
when i was in ninth grade named rex story and i remember seeing that guy and i was like this is a
grown man yeah he's going he's going the school? He had a five o'clock
shadow all the time.
Yeah.
This guy's in school.
Shaving between classes.
Yeah.
What is this?
Who is this guy?
I don't have a good
segue here,
but Dusty,
why don't you tell us
a little bit about ZocDoc?
Oh, ZocDoc.
If you throw up on the bus,
you may need a doctor.
That's true.
That's true.
All right.
Callback and a sick.
Yeah.
Thanks to ZocDoc,
we can now find and book in-person or telemedicine appointments for medical or dental care.
That is helpful for people that are on the go or work different hours like we do.
Have you ever been on the hunt for a new doctor and you asked literally everyone you know for their recommendation?
No.
They did exist.
We had the pens that were like four different colors.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, those were neat.
Yeah, purple, green.
Yeah.
Do you have the erasable pens?
Those were so weird.
Yeah, they were weird.
I used to hate those erasable pens, dude.
Yeah.
They didn't write well.
They didn't erase well.
What are we doing?
I got an erasable pen. You mean a pencil? pencil yeah what about a trapper keeper i you know what i have a trapper
keeper at home from mental middle school that i almost brought but i thought you know what i bet
people know what it looks like i wish you had what is it i don't even know you're talking a
trapper you don't know what a trapper keeper is a trapper keeper yeah is it like a you don't know what a trapper keeper is? A trapper keeper. Yeah. Is it like a- You don't know either, Lorne?
I have a trapper keeper in perfect condition.
I wish you'd have brought it.
I should have brought it. I still don't know what it is.
Well, it's a folder.
It's like a three-ring binder, but it folds.
That's a mechanical pencil.
It folds, and then it has another piece that comes over and Velcros on,
and then it has other little pockets in it.
It had a lot of cool designs on it.
None of those are-
It doesn't open up like an accordion?
No.
One of those?
No, it's just a three-ring binder, really, with another piece that comes over.
That one right there on the right with the football, that's a Trapper Keeper.
This one right here?
No, the one far right.
Yeah, Trapper Keeper.
Okay.
Yeah, that's it.
It keeps all your stuff in there.
I should have brought it.
It's in such good condition.
What's inside of it?
A three-ring binder with other pockets.
No, but what's inside of it a three ring binder with other pockets no but what's inside yours you just oh yeah i had uh card comic cards from when i was a kid oh okay
comment cards that's what i thought you said too like comment cards like marvel comics
like a comedy club comment card yeah still keep it okay i actually hated the feature i have a lot
of comment cards from when I worked at the restaurant
that I love to keep
that were just
not always about me
just funny ones.
I love those.
You have comment cards
for
at Hyman's?
Yeah.
Any mean about you?
Not really mean about me
that I was able to get.
Now there could have been
some that I didn't acquire
but yeah I mean
there would be some
mean about the restaurant or funny or nice about me that I liked.
But yeah, I mean, I saw, I got, a guy was like giving me a real attitude one time when I was working there and I see him pull the comment card out of the thing.
So I take a pen out, click it, hand it to him.
Oh, I was like, get it, dude.
I was like, get it, fill it out.
Wow. Yeah. Ooh. That's a power move. Get it, dude. I was like, get it. Fill it out. Wow.
Yeah.
Ooh.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Did, we had on our pencils, little, I don't know what you call them, little rubber things
you'd put on the pencil to kind of grip it.
Oh, those grips, dude.
You guys know what I'm talking about?
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Big time.
Yeah.
Those are really fun.
They're supposed to keep your hand from cramping up.
But if you're left-handed like me, there's no way.
I've never used these triangular ones.
These look weak.
Well, that's what I was talking about.
That's probably the original.
I'm talking about they were just flush with the pencil.
By the time you had come along, they perfected it.
Let's keep it from rolling off the desk.
Oh, that's what it was for.
I think it would play that role.
Was that an eraser, too?
Could you use that as an eraser? I think there were some. You remember that little eraser that went over the top? Oh, big's what it was for. I think it would play that role. Was that an eraser, too? Could you use that as an eraser?
I think there were some.
You remember that little eraser that went over the top?
Oh, big time.
Yeah, those were fun.
Those were a good time.
Yeah.
What about the mechanical pencil that you would twist,
and the lead would come out real far?
Never saw that.
You never saw that?
It was a yellow one, and it would twist at the end,
and then the lead would come out real far.
I think I know what you're talking about.
I think it was made by Mead.
Aaron, did you use pencils in school?
Mechanical.
Yeah, yeah. We ran the gamut.
I read where I was doing the research.
Oh, maybe that pencil mate.
There it is.
Yeah. Those. I know pencil mate. There it is. Yeah.
Those.
I know what you're talking about now.
The SAT is going all digital starting next year.
Oh, wow.
So no more number two pencils needed.
That's a huge blow for the number two pencil industry.
Because that's kind of the last time you needed to use one.
They should have been prepping for this.
Yeah.
Should have been getting themselves prepared.
How do they do it digitally now?
Do you go in like a voting booth?
You go in and take it?
That's a good question.
I don't know.
I read that it's supposed to be
more fair.
It did seem like an ad rate.
He goes,
that's a good question.
Well,
I gotta look at papers here.
We'll provide devices
to students
who don't own their own computers.
Some people don't.
So you just,
who attend schools without access to technology.
Do it on like a Chromebook in a classroom.
I guess it'll now be shorter, moving from three hours to just two hours and give students
more time per question.
You should be able to take the SAT and then just get your score back that night.
Wow.
Yeah.
What was that reaction? I know. It sounded like I was thinking that's a hot take. Wow. Yeah. What was that reaction?
I know.
It sounded like I was thinking that's a hot take.
Wow.
Did you ever like cheat off people's papers or have other people cheat off your papers?
Like copy it like in class when you'd be copying off them?
I was in Spanish in 11th grade.
I didn't want to take it.
You had to take one foreign language.
And my teacher was pregnant.
And so halfway through the year, she left and we got a substitute.
And this substitute, there was these two girls, Haley and Katie, and they would let me copy.
And they were very good at Spanish.
They would let me copy their paper every day.
The teacher knew it was happening.
They would just straight up let me copy.
Wow.
Nobody cared.
Finals time came. The substitute wouldn't let me copy wow nobody cared finals time came
the substitute wouldn't let me sit next to them so and then the entire final was in spanish
i hadn't i didn't know a single no bueno i just went i was the first one done i just went
it was no point and even reading could read couldn't read the instructions. Yeah. I just went all the way through it. I failed that test so bad. I had like a hundred
in the class, but I failed the final so bad. I almost failed the class. That's why the teacher
let you do it. I know. And they're like, you're shooting yourself in the foot. But that's really,
but she, you know what I mean? That was really, I don't, I don't appreciate her method. Cause
it's like, come on. And, uh, it's not become, it's not been a problem for me to not know it,
to not know Spanish.
But it would have been nice to know it, right?
Yeah, but I bet Haley and Katie don't even know.
No.
You know what I mean?
Not from that class.
If you were doing stand-up in Spanish right now,
I think your career would be a lot different.
Well, yeah, for sure.
You would definitely sold out in Austin.
For sure, yeah.
You know?
Yeah, I mean, yeah.
Well, you're right.
It could have played a role.
You do one night in English, do the next night in Spanish.
But who knows?
What if I had learned Spanish and end up going into a different field?
I may be more successful in another area.
You know what I mean?
Who knows what road I would have went down.
Maybe learning would have become something important to me.
And I would have said, you know what?
Actually, learning a language has opened different parts of my mind.
This earth is spinning so fast.
I could be a scientist or something talking about planets.
You would have gone to DC for vacation.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm glad that dusty doesn't exist.
You'd be an astronomer.
That's the end of it.
Dust and slay.
Maybe I would have got so into languages, I would have been like, let's learn another one.
And then another one.
But you know what?
My substitute teacher, she didn't know anything about Spanish.
Right.
Right.
You know what I mean?
Don't be like, you got to learn, but you can't teach it.
That's why she needs Babbel.
I was hoping that would be a sponsor.
That would be great.
Yeah, that would have been perfect.
This episode.
Do you guys ever have the dream that you can't remember your locker combination and have to get into it?
It's a very common dream, apparently.
Never had it.
I had a dream.
I haven't had it in a couple years now, but I used to have a recurring dream that I was in college and it was the day of final exams.
And I found out I was in a class that i had i had never been to
or i was signed up for a class i didn't know about and i had that dream i mean and then i'd
wake up and be like oh dude i graduated four years ago yeah it's such a relief yeah i don't know what
that is in my brain but i think that's a common one. It is. I've had that too. God, isn't that bizarre?
Yeah.
What is that?
I don't know.
I never have school dreams, but I will tell you something that happened.
My mom brought up some middle school yearbooks to me, and I had seen the high school yearbooks over the years.
I had looked at those.
The middle school yearbook, it felt like it opened parts of my brain, memories that had been shut down as I'm turning these pages and seeing this.
And it shook me up for a couple of weeks.
This is about a year ago.
And I just was like, it was just bringing back, like, not necessarily bad memories, but just things I had completely forgotten.
These weren't memories you've repressed.
These are just stuff you forgot about throughout life. Yeah, but it just was like, because I remember high school well, but I don't really
think about middle school that often. Right. But it was just bringing that up, and I was
like, this is weird, and I think I might have had a couple of dreams
around that time. It shook me in a weird way.
I can see that. It just brings you back to memory lane.
I went back to my elementary school a few years ago for some event and went
into the, some of the same rooms, like the cafeteria.
It seems so big to me as a kid.
And now it just seems so tiny.
I couldn't believe it was the same room.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Everything seems so much smaller, right?
Yeah.
There's a, there's a crazy year.
There's a crazy scene in the office where they go back to uh
pam's high school when they're doing that career career event have you seen the office i've seen
a lot of it i've not seen this episode they she goes back to the art room thinking that a picture
she drew when she was in high school would still be hanging up do you remember that part of it
she's like i thought it might be hanging up 35 at this point i don't think she's supposed to be that old but
to your point i think your terrible drawing is going to be hanging up here yeah 17 years later
yeah well that that part always annoyed me well that's what people always think though in a way
people always think like when when when they leave a job or they leave a school that oh they're gonna
remember me and it's like when you work at a restaurant and you think the moment you leave
people are just like can i get your shift yeah you know we had kids you have this i i don't know
if this is common or if this is just a my school thing but we had kids who graduated the year before they would show up
the next year and just come to class like the first second day of school like isn't that funny
we're here but we graduated wow in uniform that's weird it is weird i remember thinking
god these kids are nerds dude you're done with high school get out of here
it's not funny that you're here well you know if you peak in high school it is i think it is hard
to let it go but most of those kids gave it a chance i'm assuming most of the kids of your
school went to college afterwards yeah so weren't they shouldn't they been at college somewhere well
i guess maybe it started early. Yeah.
Yeah.
That's weird.
My high school gave us the option.
I remember my senior year, they gave us the option.
We voted as a senior class. Do you want to extend the school day by 15 minutes every day?
Or we start the school year a week early.
So we started July 31st that year in July.
Rather than just having extra 15 minutes each day.
Yeah, we voted on that.
I voted to start early too.
I thought it's going to be tough for a week,
but then every day, the whole school year,
I'd be thinking, gosh, I'd be out of here by now.
This last 15 minutes is brutal.
I think I would have done that, too.
Yeah.
It's like, let's just get it over with.
Probably at the time, but I think I would go the extra 15.
Every day, though, dude?
Give me that week off.
Yeah.
If it was on the back end, it would be more appealing.
Oh, that's true.
Yeah, you end a little bit earlier?
Yeah.
What about now, though?
Let's say you're doing stand-up, and they like all right they're gonna gonna go you come in on thursday do
a show on thursday or the friday sat the two shows on friday two shows on saturday you do an extra 15
each show what would you do i think that the show would suffer if I had to do that. I had to do it.
The audience votes.
They're like, you know what? Do a Thursday.
Yeah.
How about do a Wednesday as well?
Yeah.
Do them all.
That's a good question.
I don't know.
In college, our classes, Monday, Wednesday, and Friday were 50 minutes,
and Tuesday and Thursday were an hour 15.
And I liked the Monday, Wednesday, Friday classes better,
even though I went three times a week, just because hour 15 felt so long. I just wanted to get out of there.
See, block scheduling came in while I was in school. So we were doing six classes a day,
sometimes seven, for about an hour. And then after ninth grade, in 10th grade,
we went to block scheduling where we did four classes a day, all about an hour and a half.
Really?
Yeah.
An hour and a half class.
Tough, man.
Yeah.
And then you got to leave and go right to another one and start it.
But it was great in the sense that you'd have your two main classes, and then you do that half the year.
And then the second half of the year, you'd switch to four other four other classes now let me ask you a more extreme version of this so my my high school
in alabama catholic high school in the early 90s i think they they the senior class voted to move to
a four-day school week so they went like eight to five monday tuesday wednesday thursday then they had fridays off and they
did that for one year and then they all voted like let's go back oh wow yeah huh that's a long day
that is a long it's a really long day to be in school and it's long for it's long for the
teachers it's long for everybody and if you play sports then what do you do stay till seven yeah
well yeah we just probably stay that late anyway but but you'd stay way later than you would.
Yeah.
You know, if you can't start practice till 545 every day.
That's tough on everybody.
Was it cool having your dad as the principal or was it not fun?
It was convenient sometimes.
I had no things before other people, that kind of stuff.
Do you think that's why you weren't class clown?
Because you're like, there's immediate consequences if I'm getting in trouble here.
I think actually, if I'm being honest, it gave me a little more leeway with people.
Because the dynamic between me and the teachers was different.
Because you're bad's their boss yeah
essentially so that probably played into it i don't know it was just never that there were
always guys that were funnier than me you know that were like doing physical stuff and getting
big laughs you know then i was never that guy but i like snow days were were big yeah and um so my my school here in hendersonville tennessee
we had maybe two snow days when i was there and it was a big deal to get a snow day sumner county
public schools if there's a cold breeze they go we're out for a week almost every public school
in yeah they're like oh we can't we't do it. We were out all the time.
And my dad would wake up at like 4 a.m.
He would drive to the school to see the roads.
He'd drive like back roads and be like, the roads are fine out here.
And we'd be the only school in the county open all the time, dude.
Did parents like that or did they get mad?
I don't know if the parents liked it.
The kids weren't pumped about it. I'm sure.
You know, so I would be getting- If the parents liked it. The kids weren't pumped about it. I'm sure. If the parents still have to
go to work, they like it.
That's probably true. But if the
parents like, you know, my particular
road is dangerous, whatever.
And your dad's like, well,
I'll drive there and see.
Really?
I drove by your house last night.
Everything's fine. would that be an excuse
absence if they said hey it's not safe i think so yeah i think so um but i love that your dad
would make the drive oh dude my dad when the nashville flood happened the the big one come
on in yeah no it's not over our neck the the jp2 in Hendersville was like, it was like a moat around it.
Yeah.
It was so flooded and you could not get to it.
We had to take our AP tests that weekend.
And they were like, well, we're going to have to reschedule because the AP tests, the physical tests are in the building.
And my dad got in a rope.
My dad got in a boat and went to the school to get the test and then took them back in a boat.
And we took the test like off campus somewhere.
Wow, your dad was serious.
He's not going to let us get behind on stuff just because of the weather, you know.
I thought you were going to say he helicoptered in.
I like that.
I like the boat, though.
I like the idea your dad's like rescuing the test.
The tests are trapped.
There's all kinds of animals in there getting drowned.
You just got gotta grab these
tests real quick they're like oh mr weber you're here he's like i'm just here for the test i don't
have enough room for you in the boat uh-huh well i don't have a good segue for this either but tell
us about rocket money well you know what's stressing me out probably what's stressing you
out rising prices everything's more expensive these days and you're looking for ways to cut costs
you're not crazy you just need rocket money you could be wasting money and not even realizing it
look this is half my income or half my expenditures are subscriptions that i've forgotten about you
know yeah but not anymore because i use rocket money it's a personal finance app that boards
here no smart board so is that like you will you operate you operate from an iPad or it was like a TV that you could touch?
It was still a projected image, but you could touch and control things by touching the screen.
Wow.
What about the thing that looks like a little box that had like a glass top with a light in it.
And then that had a mirror and then it would project it and they would have little plastic.
And even like you could roll the plastic sometimes.
It was in that thing you had earlier.
I forgot what it's called.
I think it was called a projector maybe.
If you scroll down, it's on there.
And it had, you know, they could write on it with a little dry erase markers and it would show up.
I thought it was just what that read.
Overhead projector.
These right here.
Overhead projector, yeah.
We use these.
Oh, yeah.
That was big time.
I used plenty of these.
The overhead projector was big time.
Yeah.
You could write right on.
If you had a, you know, erasable marker, you could write right on the glass.
Really?
Yeah.
Oh, man.
I mean, it was big time.
I would never do that.
I loved an overhead projector.
Yeah.
But once you get a smart board, you're like, oh, these overheads are weak.
Yeah.
Well, obviously, they didn't have cell phones when I was in school.
They weren't invented, but I bet it was pretty crazy maybe when you were in high school.
Not for me either.
Yeah.
I mean, cell phone was probably invented, but it was not prevalent.
No smartphones.
Yeah.
I didn't get a cell phone until my sophomore year of high school.
I didn't have a smartphone until my sophomore year of college.
Okay.
So I had like a dumb cell phone.
Yeah.
Through high school.
Yeah.
Still a bit of an issue with people texting i
didn't have texting in high school maybe i did towards the end but it was not that big of an
issue i it's probably insane right now oh yeah you're doing everything on your phone i think
they got to a point where they're like they can't even tell you to put your phones away they're like
we just got to figure out how to teach you they should do what the phone right he's does and have
the yonder bags you know know, Yonder bags.
Schools are actually Yonder's, some of their biggest clients.
Oh, yeah.
That's what they should have.
You lock your phone up in a little pouch at the beginning of the day, and then at the end of the day, they open it for you.
Yeah.
That's the way they should do it.
Yeah.
Yeah, and I want to say I invited Harper Bargatze to come on to tell us about what school's like today.
She declined the offer.
Tough to get a Bargatze to come on to tell us about what school's like today. She declined the offer. Tough to get a Bargatze on here.
It is.
I asked Laura.
I asked Laura.
Laura said no as well.
So I got to talk to you guys.
They moved out of here.
They're not even here.
We don't even know what's going on.
We just show up.
But the, yeah, I mean.
Do you have a pencil sharpener like that?
Oh, dude. I love the pencil sharpener like that? Oh, dude.
Oh, yeah.
I love the pencil sharpener.
This was an excuse to get out of your chair.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You know?
Oh, yeah.
If you sat on the other side of the room, could I sharpen my pencil?
You could walk around, see what's going on.
And there's nothing like a freshly sharpened pencil.
Oh, that's great.
Especially from one of those bad boys.
Yeah.
Dude, the electric ones never worked the same.
Nah, it wasn't as good it
wasn't as satisfying you know yeah just to really feel it i have one of these in my house oh yeah
just randomly just on a wall i haven't used it you have it now yeah oh right now okay my grandmother
had one growing up so maybe that's just a thing how How old is your house? Like old? Yeah. 50s and 60s.
Maybe they just came with pencil sharpeners back then.
People were writing stuff down.
You were using number two pencils all the time.
Got a sharpener.
Yeah.
Wow.
What an industry number two pencils used to be.
What a fall from grace.
Yeah.
They ran the country back in the day.
Yeah.
What happened to number one?
What about pencil break?
Did you ever play that?
Number two pencils where you're breaking each other's pencils? No. Oh, we used to number one? What about Pencil Break? Did you ever play that? Number two pencils where you're breaking
each other's pencils?
No.
Oh, we used to play that a lot
where you hold a pencil.
Is this where you got stabbed before?
No, I got stabbed for...
We don't have to get into it.
You deserve it.
Yeah.
It wasn't a game.
It wasn't a game.
Yeah, not getting stabbed.
That was never a game.
Okay.
But Pencil Break was,
you know, you could,
you know, you snap it
and then also Thump. Did you play that where you'd hold your knuckles out like that and you'd thump each
other's knuckles you ever do that i don't know what you're doing cool you don't see that yeah
yeah yeah oh yeah like a little tracer it's a it's like flimsy yeah oh like it's an optical
illusion it looks like it's bending and flexible yeah okay see that oh yeah it's like flimsy. Yeah. Oh, like what? It's an optical illusion. It looks like it's bending and flexible.
Yeah.
Okay.
See that?
Oh yeah.
It's pretty crazy.
That's a solid.
Wow.
That is physics.
Yeah.
What about pencils on the nose?
Would you do that?
I like to put pencils in the nose and then I can hold a pencil with my chin.
You know, like, uh, I can't, this is not a pencil.
I can't do this, but you you know It's also been a long time
Since I've done it
But yeah
And then you do
Do this
Mustache
Before I had a real mustache
For the record
Nate's back next week folks
This is the good stuff
This is what I've been waiting for
This is what I'm talking about
This is
This is what school's really all about
This is what we were doing in school
What about football
Like with the little paper?
Oh, yeah.
Paper football was huge.
Paper football, paper airplanes.
I remember, do you have nap time in kindergarten?
Oh, yeah.
We played paper football during nap time.
We'd have a towel.
You brought a towel to use as like your blanket.
Yeah.
Like a bath towel.
Yeah, I remember that.
And we played paper football.
What did you sleep on, though?
I would sleep on the floor.
I never slept during nap time.
But I think you're supposed to just sleep on the towel.
We had a little mat that we would bring.
I guess you could bring a mat.
I think I did have a mat.
That's fancy, dude.
I did have a little mat, actually.
We had bath towels.
This is the late 70s.
Yeah, I know.
Not in kindergarten.
I didn't go to kindergarten, but first grade.
I mean, this is like, yeah, I mean, to me, this is the stuff.
On the bus, It was pencil break.
It was thump.
You didn't do that though.
You hold your knuckles out like that.
You try to thump it real hard.
Oh,
we would do that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm a little bit of a big Remember that game where if you look at it below the waist, you punch them on the... I used to come home from middle school, just huge bruises all over my arm.
My mom's like, what are you doing all day?
I'm like, you know, I'm respecting the game.
You have a joke about senior prank.
And when I was in Fairhope this past weekend, somebody had poured laundry detergent in the water fountain, and it was bubbling out everywhere.
Oh, that's... Yeah.
That probably cost a lot to fix.
That probably caused some real problems.
My buddy said that on his Nextdoor app,
people were not happy.
Yeah, dude.
I hate that.
Laundry detergent in the water system of the high school?
No, it wasn't.
This was just like the city fountain
like there in Fairhope.
Oh, like a decorative fountain yeah oh yeah not like i'm
sorry not the water system of the high school where like the water fountain like everybody's
eating tide pods no no i'm sorry i'm sorry like a decorative oh okay i kind of like that a little
more okay i thought y'all were taking it hard i don't like it but i i don't like vandalism but i
you know i was also in an airbnb this weekend, and it was clear they had used-
Last week, you talked about vandalism stores the whole time.
Well, I'm vandalizing a competition that's-
That's different.
That's an evil corporation.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
Not the city's water supply.
Well, yeah.
I don't think the decorative fountains tied into the drinking water.
That's where they get it.
It's all the wishing well pennies are down there, water. That's where they get it. It's all the wishing well pennies are down there too.
Yeah.
That's where they get it.
You got, you know, copper is good for you.
Yeah, all this water tastes weird. Yeah.
But I was in a Airbnb and they clearly had used too much fabric softener.
And I woke up in the night and all I could smell was, I couldn't even sleep.
I felt like I was just breathing in poison.
Dude, I had a guy on the plane this morning.
It smelled so bad.
Smelled so bad.
Worst I've ever smelled a person.
It was that seat in Southwest where there's no chair in front of me.
Yeah.
And then, so the row right in front, that guy smelled.
So he sat down.
Joe Kelly was with me.
He texted me.
He goes, this dude stinks.
And then I caught a whiff of him.
I was like, oh, my God, dude.
It was that bad.
And he kept sticking his arm out to touch the window thing up and down.
And every time he did that, I was sleeping.
And it kept waking me up.
Oh, he was reaching over you?
No, just reaching to the side.
Just making movement.
There's no chair in front of me. So I'm catching all the back draft from this dude.
And he had greased up, oiled hair.
He spent some time on his hair, but he hadn't taken a shower in probably a week.
Wow.
I mean, it was my whole flight was this guy stuck.
That's awful.
Yeah.
I was at the airport.
I forgot all about this until you talk about this, but this guy, I was sitting looking at the airline that was taking off.
And this guy was facing me.
He had big headphones on.
He was so hungover.
He was making like these groaning, moaning noises.
Very loud in the airport.
Like he was just in horrific pain.
Just, oh, he kept doing it.
I don't know if he could even hear how loud he was being.
Cause he had the headphones on.
Yeah.
And his flight,
uh,
boarded and shut the door while he's just looking.
And then he finally gets up and looks around and sees what's happening.
He starts losing his mind at the counter.
He's like,
I'm right here.
I've been right here the whole time.
As I do,
you got to take those headphones off.
I know. Yeah. You got to exist in the world. Yeah. been right here the whole time. It's like, dude, you got to take those headphones off. I know.
Yeah.
You got to exist in the world for a bit.
Yeah.
He missed his flight sitting right there, obviously in a lot of hungover pain.
And I'm like, oh, dude, you messed up.
And it was so satisfying to me for some reason.
You were glad it happened.
Yeah.
Oh, good stuff.
Well, we're at two hours, so it's probably a good time to stop.
Well, this is great.
I appreciate this.
I hope this was fun because you guys were making fun of me when I started talking about pencils and stuff.
But to me, that's what I was talking about.
That's when I was the most engaged, and Brian shot it down real quick.
But this weekend, I'm going to be in Kansas City at the Kansas City Improv.
I go there every year.
I'm pumped to come back.
I love Kansas City, so please come see the shows. go there every year. I'm pumped to come back. I love Kansas City.
So please come see the shows.
Going to get some barbecue back on me.
Yeah.
Oh, I had a lot of barbecue this weekend, but I probably will again.
Some burn-ins.
Actually, you know what?
Last time I was in Kansas City, I ate at an Indian restaurant, and that was so good.
I get it.
A little hole in the wall Indian restaurant was the best.
Big time.
I'll probably go there.
Let's see.
August 27th.
I'm in Irwin, Pennsylvania. That's right outside Pittsburgh. I'll probably go there. August 27th, I'm in Irwin, Pennsylvania.
That's right outside Pittsburgh.
I'm at Community Church.
It's open to the public, so anybody can come.
Nice.
September 2nd, Skyline Comedy Club in Appleton, Wisconsin.
Two shows.
And September 9th, North Charleston, South Carolina.
All right.
Comedy at the Sparrow.
Oh, awesome.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I've been to the Sparrow a few times.
I've never been.
Who runs that show?
I think his last name's Bates, actually.
I think his name's-
Oh, Josh Bates.
Yeah, Josh Bates.
There we go.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So-
Bates Unite.
Yeah.
I'm there in December, so let me know how that is.
All right.
I've heard nothing but good things.
All right.
I am in a city I've always loved and never said anything bad about.
I'm in Louisville, Kentucky.
All right.
The Oakland A's.
I don't even remember what you're talking about, Brian.
I'm in lovely Louisville at Laugh Louisville Comedy Club, which is a new club.
We've always said that's one of our favorite cities.
Talk about it ad nauseum.
Yes.
I'll be at Laugh Louisville all weekend.
Next weekend, I'm in Cleveland at Hilarities.
All right.
I love Hilarities.
I'm knocking off all these clubs that I've heard nothing about since I started.
They're the best.
It's very exciting.
Hilarities is one of my favorites.
So come on out.
Louisville, Cleveland, Pittsburgh, Boston, Cape Cod. the best like it's very exciting hilarious is one of my favorites so come on out louisville cleveland
pittsburgh boston cape cod oh i'm supposed to wrap this up right yeah yeah that would have been a
great time to put a button on it brian you know it's not as easy as it looks you're right you're
right i made fun of you earlier now two hours later love you all this is not lost on us let's
see we're having a good time uh again i love you all this none of not lost on us. We're having a good time. Again, I love you all.
None of this is lost on me.
None of it.
Because come on the shows, you're just the nicest fans.
And thank you so much.
Nate is back next week.
So last time we did two shows, two podcasts, the first one, man, like, this is great.
And by week two, they're like, no, when's Nate back?
Yeah.
So Nate's back next week.
Don't worry.
And he'll have a lot of stories to tell.
I'm sure.
An Australian accent when he comes back.
Yeah, he might.
He might.
So thanks, everybody, for listening, and we're having a good time.
All right.
I love you.
Nateland is produced by Nateland Productions and by me nate bargetzi and my wife laura on the audio
boom platform recording and editing for the show is done by genovations media thanks for tuning in
be sure to catch us next week on the nateland podcast