The Nateland Podcast - 202: #202 Sleep

Episode Date: May 29, 2024

Hopefully this week's episode won't put you to sleep but that is this week's topic, along with Dusty maybe sharing a flight with a famous baseball player and Nate and Aaron starting a new weight loss challenge. Factor: Factormeals.com/nate50 Head to Factormeals.com/nate50 and use code nate50 to get 50% off your first box plus get 20% off your next month while your subscription is active! ButcherBox- Butcherbox.com/nate Sign up at butcherbox.com/nate and get our special deal! Butcherbox is offering our listeners a special deal plus $20 off your first order. Join today using my link butcherbox.com/nate and use code NATE receive this unique deal today. Rocket Money- Rocketmoney.com/Nate Stop wasting money on things you do not use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to Rocketmoney.com/Nate today.

already fun already been pretty fun it has been uh yeah that should be the way they say it yeah yeah rocket money uh hello folks hey bear welcome to the eight land podcast i'm neighbor getsy brian bates aaron weber dusty yeah we're bringing the paws back yeah i like that i like bringing the paws yeah uh welcome hope you had a wonderful memorial weekend uh we're recording this before memorial we're all we'll all be off that week so we went in this is a pre-record uh first time in a while we've done this yeah yeah it's an energy exact that i yeah that i haven't had in a while yeah yeah yeah we're trying you trying. You know, it's good if we, you know.

I don't think we've had that many backed up podcasts, right? We used to do it quite a bit, I feel like. Not an insane amount, though. I mean, out of 200 episodes, I mean, it can't be. Yeah, maybe 100 of them were. No. I'm just kidding. I was like. When we first started and everybody wasn't so busy,

we'd always have a backup ready in case something happened. Right. Yeah. Yeah. A bottle episode. Yeah. We would. Oh,

is it? Yeah. I think so. A bottle in a TV show, a bottle episode, uh, where it doesn't advance the narrative of the whole season, but you can just throw it in at any time.

Oh yeah. Why is that a bottle? I don't know why they call it a bottle episode. Cause it lives in its own bottle. Like, yeah, like a little shit. It's like, yeah, it's just its own. You can put it in anywhere. I always call it a bottle episode. Because it lives in its own bottle. Yeah, like a little ship. Yeah, it's just its own.

You can put it in anywhere. I always called it evergreen, meaning it could live at any time. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. That's great. Who do you think is the most evergreen of us that could have lived in any time? I mean, that's interesting because Dusty doesn't feel like he's from in any time. I mean, that's interesting

because Dusty doesn't feel like he's from the current time. So you think that would be the answer. Yeah. Really? And I don't know if he can really live in the time that we're in right now. That's true. He's having a hard time.

That is true. It remains to be seen. That is true. And also depending on what kind of jobs are available at different times. That's true. You know? Now, Brian, you've seen the most times.

What do you think out of the four of us? You've lived through. Yeah, I think I have to remove myself just out of fairness, right? Yeah, because you've lived through the most. Uh-huh. I mean, I kind of proved I did it. You have talked to someone that was in the depression. Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. Pl Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. Plenty of people. Yeah. That's not even. Who's the person that's still alive today that seems like they're from such a bygone?

I'm talking about like a famous person. I have someone in mind. That doesn't feel like they're from this era? Just being like, that person's still alive. It seems like they're just from another era. I mean. Yeah, it'd be like if Andy Griffith was still alive right now or something.

Jack Nicholson, he feels like. Gene Hackman. Yeah. Yeah, is Gene Hackman, he's still alive? Yeah. Yeah, Gene Hackman. Yeah, a photo of him surfaced recently. Did you see that?

Yeah. The gas station, didn't even look like it. No, I'm always pushing the Gene Hackman thing. I have a video where I met Gene Hackman. It's always pushing. Anytime you get an opportunity to mention Gene Hackman,

I'm going to throw it in there. Yeah. We were just talking this weekend. A bunch of the people from the Manson murders are still around. That's kind of surprising. Even the fact that

Charles Manson himself is... He died recently. Did he die? He died in 2017. Rest his soul. I didn't know he died. Man, it was... He died recently. Did he die? He died in 2017. Rest his soul. I didn't know he was. Man, it was.

He died in 2017? Yeah. Yeah. Well, who's your, do you want to say? Maybe I knew it back then. Here's one. He just had a birthday. Willie Mays. Yes.

Willie Mays seems like. Oh my gosh. I didn't know he's still around. Such a bygone era of baseball. Right. The fact he's still alive. Yeah. Yeah.

Hank Aaron died recently too well it's like Willie Mays definitely like Nolan Ryan has always just been in baseball

so it feels like he's because he was always yeah but he played until the 90s yeah but he's always been a

like he doesn't he run the Rangers or something yes he's involved with the Rangers he's around I'm glad you brought up Nolan Ryan I saw a video the other day about people always talk about Does he run the Rangers or something? Yes, he's involved with the Rangers. He's around. He's around.

I'm glad you brought up Nolan Ryan. I saw a video the other day about people always talk about the GOAT. They're always saying, who's the greatest? And they'll, you know, Tom Brady, LeBron James, Michael Jordan. And this guy proposed that Nolan Ryan is the GOAT, right? Because he's like, when you talk about greatest of all time, he's like, you got to think about people's records that will never be broken. And apparently, no one, Ryan, has a lot of records that no one's even close to breaking. Where it's like, Tom Brady has all these championships, but there's potential that Patrick Mahomes, who's already on his way, can do it. But they have, yeah, I could see that.

I think it's, I could argue against that yeah seven no hitters seven no hitters but also has the most one hitters and the most two hitters well the thing is

he's the greatest strikeout pitcher for all time there's no doubt I mean ERA's high by far never won a Cy Young

yeah that's like never won which is crazy why would that because he always had a lot of losses. He has more loss.

One of the most losses of any pitcher. Yeah. Honestly, dude, he stunk. I don't even know what you're talking about. One of the worst pitchers of all time. I don't know all those. He's the greatest power pitcher. I just, but I just think he has, apparently, according to this guy, I wish I had the video. He's just has records that will never be broken.

That's true. It's just the Tom Brady's records be that's true it's just the tom brady's records are championships and they're the highest it's like mike trout is never going to be count you know if he played for the yankees maybe they consider him the greatest player of all time but he was at the angels and it's so then you're like yeah at talent wise you're like he's one of the greatest players ever to play talent wise but you know you need the whole package i guess to be you know because jordan you know jordan doesn't uh his name's on stuff but he won't have records of everywhere and you

know people play longer like lebron's played a lot longer than jordan uh and so that whole thing or kobe but it was was their phase they were in. I mean, because Gretzky, the thing with hockey is they're probably the most definite greatest of all time in a sport could be hockey. Because Gretzky has records, and his records are so far that they can't be broken. He's the most famous of hockey players. By far the most famous hockey player.

That's probably the most. Only one you know. Yes. And that could be just because we don't know it. But even we talk to Graham, Canadians will talk about Gretzky. But Gretzky is probably the only this is the only most definite greatest of all time in their sport i saw jordan would be right there too but i mean you know you're gonna have people argue about a stat if you take away all of his goals he still leads in points

yes time yes oh yeah just based off just based off assists it's that dominant yeah uh whereas i think all of michael j Jordan's records have been broken. All his points records. I mean, LeBron. But no one was no dominant. Like in Tigers like that, where Tiger had, it's like he won't, you know, possibly, probably won't pass Nicklaus for the most majors. But what he did in the reign that he did it in was just like

so powerful and just like so dominant yeah and so there's fact it's just different areas you're like yeah you know it's like you just go like yeah there was jack nicholas and then you're like well then there's tiger and so what happened to him he hurt his back and then suddenly was just never i know he had some other stuff personal things things, but physically, is that what happened? Yeah, a lot of his back fusion was really bad. He had knee problems. Had to do a new swing, right? Didn't he completely change the way he swung?

He completely changed his swing at one point. And then, yeah, just a lot of stuff. Injuries would be the, I mean, his personal stuff also was, it came at times when it shouldn't have come. A real spoke in the wheel. What if the surgeon for his back was a real Jack Nicklaus fan? Yeah. And he was like, I don't know what's going on with this. And he never did the one thing that he knew.

Right. He's like, I don't want this guy to break the record. Yeah, yeah. Could be. Yeah. Yeah, he could be in that situation. Yeah, Dylan Rod's a very specialized record. They'll never be broken.

Like Ricky Henderson was still in bases he's by far the greatest bass dealer of all time yeah and that'll probably never be broken you know

yeah I think you're trying to be because it's not quantity over quality yeah so it's like that kind of thing quality

you gotta look at quality you know but it just depends but it's like this guy just wants to get people riled up so yeah probably so and i i wasn't riled up by it but i was like that's an interesting take yeah yeah because he's one you never hear mentioned yeah discussion yeah i thought i saved the video but you know what i save a lot of videos you got some folders on your phone you don't want to open up on the podcast i think he

has like 2 000 more strikeouts than the next guy wow yeah that's insane uh but we were talking about that because we watched the movie the strangers which is uh scary horror movie and but the the tape like all that sharon tate and all that we're just talking about like that's so insane because i just like looked at it like it, and, like, it is. And those people are still alive, like, with the Manson. Squeaky Fromm, Tex Watson. Yeah. Tex Watson was the guy.

You know the weird thing? Like, Roman Polanski, right, did some stuff, right? He's, like, a bad guy, right? And so they went to his house. Oh, yeah. And then he wasn't there. Yeah. his house oh yeah and then he wasn't there yeah so like imagine had he been there they would have like saved whatever roman polanski was going to do later they would have saved those victims oh

man yeah there could have been some silver lining yeah oh yeah but instead he wasn't there and then they went on a different path man they're yeah it's it's crazy if you're roman polanski to just like you've been like you've been uh mixing up with a lot of like that's the thing where he's like what i'm responsible for the murders you're like you're not but it's crazy that you they went to your house you're like it is crazy you're around a lot of stuff, that's like when people get in trouble where you go, I know you did not do this, but you're definitely around a lot of the things happening. More than I've been. Yeah. You go, because let me introduce this guy.

He's never had someone murdered in his life that he's known. Now, you have been dabbling. that he's known now you have been dabbling like every bad person has a connection you know because you've been around for so long like yeah every you know like even the the jinx like that guy probably knew roman put out i'm saying probably yeah i don't know for sure but yeah that is funny uh it's uh yeah yeah well happy memorial day happy yeah i hope you had a good weekend my show and hustle was great sold out sold it out standing ovation standing when you walked out and not at the end of the show or vice versa or both went backwards would you rather get one at the beginning or the end? The end.

The end, for sure. If you get one at the beginning and not the end, then you got to wonder what will happen. Well, that's like, you almost don't want one at the beginning because that's a lot of pressure to do. Like, oh, geez. The beginning is, yeah. Yeah, the beginnings of respect. Seinfeld got one at the beginning in the Hollywood Bowl show

because it's kind of like, yeah, man. Yeah, it's him. It's him. And so it's an, it's a, I think that one means that's a very nice one.

And then the end is, you know, but the end is like, yeah, it went, you know. You delivered. You delivered. Yeah.

You delivered. I don't know if people know what to do. So, but it's nice. It does mean a lot when they stand up. Yeah, it's very, very nice. Because they don't know if people know what to do so but it's nice it does mean a lot when they stand up yeah it's very nice

because they don't always not everybody always stands up you think it's like oh it just wants some point every they just do it everywhere but

a lot of times it's comics with a lot of high energy like there's a comic named John Morgan the Raging Cajun oh love it

and he has a lot of energy. And he was getting standing ovations like every show. And I'm not saying he's not good. He is good. But he's like, he works it. Like he's sweating. And at the end of it, there's a recognition of like, oh, you just gave us a package show. That's the end of it.

He bows. And it kind of makes sense to stand yeah yeah is that what you're saying uh i didn't know that about the bow and that but yeah i just think it's he's got a lot of energy and he really works it so people are like yeah we just saw this guy really work it up there is he dirty yeah yeah he's not like uh like old school dirty yeah he just i'm pretty sure he heckled me like 20 years ago when I was in the audience. Oh, yeah? Yeah.

Was it a Cajun accent? No, I don't think so. I think so. Yeah. Yeah. What happened? I was just there with my date at Zaney's and not even sitting up close, sitting in the back. And he, does he do some crowd work?

Probably. Yeah. Yeah. And it was just, you know, he was talking about something kind of dirty and then he picked me. I was like, what about you, sir? Do you do this particular thing? And I'm just there.

And I, you know, I was like, no. You got a first date? No, but you know. Last date. Yeah. Might have been the last date. And then, you know, I don't remember what I said. I was so, and then he kind of made fun of me.

And then later in the show, he came back to me for something else. And he's like, do you do this? And he's like, oh, come on, man. You got to do that. You know, whatever. I was so humiliated. You just got to start saying, yeah. I know.

Yeah, I do that. Yeah. This morning. Yeah. I was so embarrassed. Yeah. Did you already want to start comedy when you went? No, I didn't even.

You thought, I'm going to start and I'm going to get that guy back. Yeah. If I ever work with him, I'll tell him the story. When you started, were you doing the type of comedy you are now or did you come out of the gates? It's fun to think about. You had an era where you were just like crazy on stage. Bad boy days.

He had a leather jacket. I tried to be even more low energy when I first started, like Steven Wright ish almost. Okay. Yeah. But I was always clean. Yeah. Yeah.

But no, but no, that was a long before I ever even considered doing comedy. You just liked comedy. We would just occasionally, I was dating this girl. We occasionally go to, you this girl we occasionally go to you know we'd go to zany's it was when you didn't even know who the comics were you just go to see

them i don't think i've ever asked what made you get it what made you want to do comedy i know it's a basic question but uh i just took uh i don't know i just i people told me i was funny and then finally at age 35 i took rick roberts stand-up comedy classes for fun and thought it would be a four-week thing and then started going open mics and one thing led the other and just kept going yeah no no great story that's pretty great yeah yeah i was i was three years older than a is now. When he started. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. All right. I don't think I've ever realized that. Yeah. All right. We'll start. You know, I did see. Who is it?

I don't know. I'm sorry. I can't think of her name. Leanne Morgan's friend. Karen Mills. Karen Mills. I was watching a Karen Mills video, and it was a pretty old video. And they cut to the audience, and I saw Brian.

Yeah. Like a young Brian Bates. Just like it was. Just a fan. Yeah. Yeah. Just at the crowd. Yeah.

1986. Were you? No. It was pretty old, though. It was maybe not that old, but it was pretty old though maybe not that old but it was pretty old no it was it was

maybe it was that Henry Cho he would have been 15 at the time yeah it was like 2010 yeah okay

I mean the video quality made it look a little older but yeah it was pretty funny yeah that's funny alright so Amber Markham Mark Sadly, my son passed away in January. It's heartbreaking. He was only 24 years old. I have an hour commute to work every day, and I don't think I could have done it these last few months without this podcast.

few months without this podcast. My son and I had the pleasure of seeing the band at Bridgestone last year. And I am so grateful for that memory with him and for all of you. Your sincere love of stand up your fans, each other and life in general has made life bearable. And you're truly the highlight of my week. That is very sweet, Amber. Sorry about that. And are with you and we are proud to be with you. It's very, very nice. A lot of pressure on this episode, huh? Yeah. Big Amber, did you and your son talk about why Dusty didn't move

on the stage? He thought it turned on its own. He was back to him the whole time. Yeah. He thought it turned on its own. It was back to him the whole time. Yeah.

Abigail. I've heard Nate say that it's fun to find a new comic and watch their career develop through the years. For me, Aaron is that comic. I saw him open at John Chris Show in Waco, Texas around 2019. I remember thinking he was good. I started watching Nate Land around episode three because at that time, Aaron was the only comic I recognized.

Ooh. Look at me bringing people to the table. Yeah. I've since come to appreciate the comedy of Nate, Brian, and Dusty, but it's been special to see how Aaron's career has developed since that Waco show. There you go.

2019 feels like a lifetime ago. Yeah, Abigail, you should go back and watch a video that I have called, talk about being at the Upper Peninsula, because that's airing probably in 2017, maybe even 16. So that's a fun one if you want to go back. There's a clip from my set.

I'm up there bombing at that casino I think you put a clip of this in that video bombing not even like no reaction and a dude just walks in a dude just walks in and goes and I go alright

I mean I can't get them to like boo me they don't care we both bombed that show. Yeah, you did a little better, but thank you. Well, thank you, Abigail. She's going to leave her last name. Is that Nate?

That's your sister? Yeah, it's my sister. Emma Spradlin. Spradlin. I am a pastor of a small church and still get nervous every week before I preach. I'm thinking over scripture announcements and making sure I give it my all. It seems to never fail that when there's a problem, the congregation brings it to me five minutes before service. It drives me crazy. Now I

have that to worry about on top of everything else. My question is, do people do this to you before you go on stage? Do you have a rule against people bringing you problems before you go on uh i've gotten better with that where we would just kind of shut our backstage down just to be people on the show so there would be no problems being brought because it's just the ones that the guys that have been on the show and been hanging out all weekend like you just kind of want to see your crew you don't want to you don't have to answer any questions or worry about anything yeah but i mean i've had plenty you know i mean i've had laura call me and we're being a fight and i'm like i'm about to go on stage and then you're you know then you got to go on stage and you're just and i mean sometimes

i've said what we i just said i was just gonna fight with her here's what we talk like you just in the moment you're just like got to get it off your chest but uh yeah it definitely did have i get uh you know i'll get some now screen time requests right before i hit the stage from Harper. But yeah, I think I'm learning more is for what you're doing up there because it seems like, well, you're just talking, you're just thinking about it. But if you are, like when I go on stages, I want it to be, it's an act.

So I like it being, you know, we had a thing this weekend where the light, the lights kind of messed up or last uh light the lights kind of messed up or last weekend the lights kind of messed up and uh and i realized like when i'm up there it's like kind of uh it's a rhythm it's like a there's a bit of a sing-songy kind of thing to it where i'm you know your rhythm's kind of going and when something like that happens it kind of really takes you out of the moment and then you you're like, well, now I got to restart. And I mean, not necessarily that I think, I don't know if people notice it, but in my head,

it's frustrating. Cause then you're like, I was, you know, you kind of mind, I like to, it builds up, you know, it's like you start here, then you just kind of keep climbing up. And so you just want to be in that rhythm. And so you're trying to stay in it. And so, but I think there is definitely something to be said that, yeah, just, you know, at, uh, I'm sure she probably thinks I have to go meet everybody at the thing. You know, it's like, well, just don't do that. Yeah. You know, just be like, I'm going to go back. And cause I, you,

you're doing it for the right reasons. You're doing it because you want the message that you're sending out to be like, I'm trying to give you the best. I'm not trying to – just at that current moment. And then if that gets broken, then it gets broken that day. And whatever. It's not none of people's fault. But it's like yeah when

they're i think a lot you know a lot of past actually very welcoming people and maybe you know you're like hey i have someone else welcome them and i need to go back and just kind of get my head right because you really do yeah i mean yeah bringing people problems five it's like yeah just take it easy just i don't think people think of it as a show for pastors. Yeah. Comedy can be that same way where sometimes people think comedy is easy because a lot of comics make it look very easy. Yeah.

We were kind of just talking about this, but it's like a lot of people think like, oh, I can do comedy because everybody's funny. Everybody's funny. But it's a lot of work to get into. It's a true performance. And, like, when I go out there, it's like that's what I love about it is I love, like, to be like, let me just do my – I'm going to, you know.

It's like I get to be on stage and, like, be kind of this character. Not that you're a character, I'm telling true stories, but I'm tearing them, telling them in like just a perfect way to, you know, kind of bring you in this journey. And it's like, just let it, let that go, you know? And that's, what's fun. That's the art of it. Yeah.

Yeah. You're like a character of yourself. Yeah. You know, where, you know, it's like, uh, you're having a conversation, but there's no one to talk to you. And if they like uh you're having a conversation but there's no one to talk to you and if they do you're like get them out of here yeah yeah so yeah i think yeah she's uh emma i would i would do yeah do that just try to as nice as you can just be like duck out i like to not even make it a big thing you know you don't tell anybody you just kind of

like i'm gonna go uh just go be quiet for a second. Go pray. Go figure it out. You could do this. Do you go, you think this is what Jesus wants right now? You need to come back here and tell me this right now? You think that's what he wants? Yeah.

Hey, this is Easter. I think we're talking about some pretty big things this week. Yeah. But I'm sure the parking lot frustration. You should just say that. That was everywhere. Did they come up with a problem? Then to all of them, she goes, well, Jesus did die for all of our sins. So I'm sure you'll figure it out.

You can go that way. That's another way to go. She's become a completely different pastor. Jason Feller. I've just had a couple. Wait a minute. Didn't we just have a F a completely different past. Jason Feller. I've just had a couple. Wait a minute. Didn't we just have a Feller? We did have a Feller.

We had a Tommy Feller. Tommy Feller. Oh, this is Jason Feller. Jason Feller. The Feller family. The Feller family is. A couple of Fellers up in the country. Look at this.

I mean, they have to be, right? How many Fellers are there? How many Fellers are there? Bob Feller. Bob Feller, the pitcher. Yeah. Oh, there was a Bob Feller? Yeah, one of the greatest pitchers of all time.

That might be their dad. Could be. I bet if he's one of the best pitchers of all time, he got a lot of kids. Well, he got, yeah. They might not even know it. Well, I mean, you know, he's probably, you know. He's better than Nolan Ryan. Yeah.

Is he? Yeah. than Nolan Ryan. Yeah. Is he? Yeah. I don't think so. But he played in like the 20s and 30s, I think. So these would be his grandkids. He had no real competition. Wow. It's just him and a couple other guys.

I think he was playing against, you know, Babe Ruth and Lou Gehrig and all those guys. And I know their names. Even before that? No, I think he was later. I think he was like the 40s, right? 40s and 50s. I mean, I know Babe Ruth and Lou Gehr that? No, I think he was later. I think he was like the 40s, right? 40s and 50s? I mean, I know Babe Ruth and Luke Garrett. When all the men went to war?

Yeah. Bob Feller's out there going. He was the one guy pitching against the women that played baseball. That's why his last name's Feller. He was the one guy. Yeah. 36 through 56. So he played, yeah, through the 40s.

Yeah. 30s and 40s. And 50s. For who do you play for? You play for the Tigers? Okay. through the 40s. Yeah. 30s and 40s and 50s. Who do you play for? The Tigers. Tigers. Okay. Oh, the Cleveland Indians.

Never mind. The Indians. Yeah, he said his dad. Now the Guardians. A prodigy. Oh, wow. He's a prodigy. So this could be his grandkids.

Yeah. He skipped the minor leagues. He was so good. He made his debut in the majors at the age of 17. And then he went to fight in World War II. Yeah. He skipped the minor leagues. He was so good. He made his debut in the majors at the age of 17. And then he went to fight in World War II. I'm just trying to make a joke. This guy's a true hero. Sorry.

Yeah. He got the Feller family in here. Be careful. He shares a birthday with me. And he was on the USS Alabama. Look at that. His your same birthday. Yeah.

He's a couple years younger. His is your same birthday. He's a couple years younger. He was ranked 36 in the 100 greatest baseball players of all time. Man, lived to 2010. Wow. Who was number one on that list? Babe Ruth, probably. And he's named the greatest pitcher of all time.

Of his time. Of his time. Yeah, that's a big difference. That's like a huge yeah sorry notre dame uh jason feller i've had a i've just had a couple of experiences recently where i felt like i'm paying to watch some practice for this special instead of getting the best they have to offer i know nate has mentioned trying things out at zany's on week nights that makes sense to me

is that common practice for arena slash theater comedians just wondering if this is something comedians at his level discuss I hope he's not talking about my show he goes I think you're always

I think everybody's had I think you're an experience yeah but it's a good experience yeah I think so I think when they leave they go that was an experience yeah I think so're an experience. Yeah. But it's a good experience. Yeah, I think so. But I think when they leave, they go, that was an experience. Yeah, I think so.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, they should not be doing it at a theater or an arena. Absolutely. If they're at that level where they can sell out an arena or theaters, it should not be like I'm trying stuff. I mean, maybe if they're just only arenas,

like Kevin Hart does arenas and he'll, his, his warmup stuff will be in theaters. Maybe that scenario is, is okay. Cause it's like his level where you would see him is this arena level. So maybe he wouldn't go back to, but even him,

he would, he goes to clubs and they are like most of the comics you go to clubs is like you know working it out and you're just up there and but you said i mean overall you want to still be doing to try to do a good show it's like you know you know i never go up there and you know i mean i if i pop in zany's it's like i might you know just i'll be looking at my phone and just but i'll be trying to tell some stuff but i'll still i'm still gonna end on it you notice you will end on a good joke you'll make sure like yes that you don't leave with a like i don't what was that yeah yeah i'm still doing a show yeah it's like i'm on stage and they don't Yeah, I mean, I don't even want to ever feel comfortable not getting laughs on stage.

Like, so even when I go out, before I say a joke, it's rarely am I saying something that, like, it's, you know, I'm like, I have no idea if this will do good or not. I usually have a pretty sense. I have a direction. So, yeah, I don't know what you're talking about, but it's definitely. But I think it does happen, though, what he's saying to me. Because people talk about, I've heard people say they saw this comic right after their special came out. And they were like, they just said it just was like really like all new stuff and not very good. And maybe the comic they were talking about is just not not very good some look comedy is still very new and so it's still going to this you know it's like

i'm like this this is the first like time i'm taking time off uh before the next tour in 25 uh to really go get an act and like build it and i've never really done that i've always kind of been just kind of you kind of keep touring and just kind of keep going uh because it's no one in comedy's just done kind of it's just i don't know it's like there hasn't been tons and tons of comedians doing much big tours or it's just so there's no of comedians doing much big tours or it's just so there's no exact system there's not a farm like music there's a pretty exact system because so many people have done it where you know you're like at this level then this level then you get to that there's like somewhat and then your whole main goal is to sell out stadiums you know but with comedy is like you know there's not that

many people that are trying to just be a professional stand-up comedian and that's the end of it usually it was always like do comedy then you're trying to get something else so then you can go back to comedy and sell tickets but now there's you know there's a few more that are just going through straight up stand-up comedy so then there can be maybe an experience but that so you know it's it's yeah it's they shouldn't be doing it i mean an arena i don't even know how you could do it that's arenas you can't i mean i've tried a new joker in arena and it just doesn't if you have no confidence in it, you have no chance. I did it all this weekend.

Yeah. I walked out there. I said, what do y'all want to talk about? Yeah. Let's get into it. And he murdered. Yeah. He goes, name something.

Yeah, throw out a couple topics. Balloons. Yeah. 45 minutes on balloons. He's supposed to do eight minutes. Yeah. We were. Nate's lightning from the side of the stage.

He's like, get off, dude. And they're going, no, more, more. Before the show, yeah. Everybody, reach under your chairs. Everybody had balloons around their heads. Oh, he did it. I don't know. How do you know?

You know, it was crazy. That's what he does. But yeah, I think that an arena, I don't even, you couldn't even, I can see someone trying it. I definitely could see that happening but you're there if you're an arena dude it's arenas it's it's so many people it's a lot to like that's what i mean like you have to have your act honed in and it has to be completely right theater in the exact same situation it's a lot of people you know theaters can be 1 000 seats where they can you know if you've done big places maybe it's you know you know i'm doing a lot of arenas so if i go to a thousand seat theater it's like you would feel

like i'm not really in those rooms secret show yeah yeah uh but it's not uh yeah you yeah you but you should always don't tell always try to do good. That's a good ad. You think he's good? You already got your towel picked up for this summer? Your day-to-day towel? I have started bringing a sweat towel with me to clubs because when I go, I go to the bar and I go, can you get me a towel?

And they give me like some dish rag that just looks gross. And I go, I feel a little more dignified if I got a black. You bring it. Yeah.

I almost go like, pretend I'm like a black comic. Give me what you would give them. Yeah. Put that in your rider. You got to put that in your rider that you want a black towel. You should bring,

you have towels. I've got some. And people have actually brought me sweat towels. Fans of this podcast. Get You should bring... You have towels. I've got some. People have actually brought me sweat towels, fans of this podcast. Get some Weber towels. Aaron Weber towels. Sell those. Sell those? Some Weber towels? Yeah. Some Weber towels. Use ones. Yeah. Do like Elvis.

When Elvis pulled his scarf off. Yeah. Throw it out. I'd take my sweat towel, throw it into the crowd at the end of the show. You should have a bunch of them. Good night. You just do one dab. Every time I use it, I throw it in the crowd. Like guitar picks. And then of the show. You should have a bunch of them. Good night. You just see what you did. Do one dab. You toss them. Every time I use it, like guitar picks. And then after the show, after the show,

the servers are bringing you the towels from off the floor. You're like, no one took these. Nobody wanted these. Good, I need them back. Actually, some people left. Someone gets hit by a towel

that was, you know, that they had to leave in the bathtub. It's so wet. It just, it just, and they're like, God, I mean, it's like, it the bathtub. It's so wet. It just, it just. And they're like, God.

And he's like. It's like a weight blanket. Yeah. It just, you see their nose through the imprint. That's how wet it is. And then he's just like, what happened to that? He goes, that was, that was a new joke. I got, you know, I was nervous for that.

Got in a splash zone. Yeah. Grace Mogford. Mogford. At the beginning of the... Yeah, Grace Mogford. Grace is such a graceful name, and that last name just kind of comes at you. That's got to be a married name.

She married into that. Yeah. I agree. I can see that. Old Grace Mogford. And a lot of... And you know she had friends going you're really gonna take his name yeah yeah she goes now but i love him though yeah i'll become mrs mogford mogford yeah

uh at the beginning of the podcast nate said he wrote a song with walker hates is there a plan for it to be released uh no there's i mean there's no plan walker blew up yeah you know uh he was not that he was nobody but he was smaller than he is now when you did this, right? This feels like a lifetime ago. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is before the Fancy song that was everywhere. Yeah, the Fancy. He's got another one out now.

Yeah, I mean, Walker's doing great. Wonderful guy. Yeah, I have no plan. We'll figure it out, though. I say before the end, you know, we'll do this. We'll have it played. But you recorded something, right? Yeah.

He sang it. I did not sing it. You wrote the lyrics? Me and him wrote the lyrics. You were in the room when he wrote the lyrics? No, we wrote them. Okay. There's a line.

Was this a sad song? Like a love song? He didn't listen a little more sad you know it's like it's uh it's a you know like uh to your partner's song oh you know yeah yeah husband to kind of husband to wife song yeah but it's a sad song it's a yell song you know it's like a frustrated you have to get married oh yeah walker's a trick shot artist now oh really his instagram is just him doing him and his family doing trick shots yeah he's got a bunch of kids yeah yeah he's great uh he's doing great too anita sunday sunday in anita sunday sunda i always assume anita is a fake name because it's Anita Sunday. Sundi. Anita Sunday.

Sunda. I always assume Anita is a fake name because it's always used in like Anita Hamburger or something. You know what I mean? Oh, yeah. Anita Sunda. Anita Sunday. That would be the joke. But all the way from where? Trento, Italy, which is the New Jersey of Italy.

Trenton. That's what it made me think of. Trento, Italy. Fellow Italian. We're Italian. I just want to say that I listen to a lot of podcasts and always skip the adverts.

I guess I'll find out what that means later in this comment. The Nightland Podcast is the only one where I actually enjoy listening to the ad reading. So it's ads. Yeah. Advertisement. Advertisement.

Especially when one of you messes up, we can hear the others giggling in the background. I also agree that Aaron is a superb ad reader. Yes, ma'am. Has he considered

professionally ad reading? Good way to make some extra money. He knows he could need it. That's what you do right now. And his comedy is not that good. I was going to say. I need that.

This really took a turn. It's really nice. I'm really having a go at comedy at the moment. She did not say that. I know. I made that. How Abigail would think if you started to develop your ad reading. A professional ad reader.

Yeah. I would do it. You could be like the micromachine man. Who's that? The guy that talk real fast. Oh, at the end of radio commercials? No, there's a... Micromachine?

Micromachine. He used to advertise. For micromachines. Yeah, I thought we talked about it on this episode. Yeah. I don't really listen when we're talking. Yeah. He just talked real fast.

Okay. Cynthia Smith. We had a minor flood in our upstairs bathroom that is fast becoming a major restoration project yesterday a company was here tearing up all the damaged floors and i walked upstairs to check on the progress much to my surprise i found a worker asleep on my bed how do i mention what i saw to the boss, man? How would y'all handle this situation? You know what? I could see myself not saying anything,

but then it's the thing that I would say, you got to go just do it immediately. That's like one of those you can do. You go, what are you doing, dude? If you would have think about it when you go to sleep, you go, hey, you wake up and go, are you insane? Why are you sleeping in my bed you walk out come on and then you walk away and you make it you don't have to make a scene so then you feel comfortable it's just being like and if he comes you go what that's the honest reaction anybody on the play or go get one of

the guys with him and go can you wake your yeah your boys asleep yeah i think your boys asleep she's gonna go to his boss yeah yeah and i think you yeah you should go to him you go can you wake your yeah your boys asleep yeah i think your boys asleep she's gonna go to his boss yeah yeah and i think you yeah you go to him you go hey he fell asleep yeah you just say it yeah and then the boss just switches him to a different job he's like he's the only guy i can find to do the work so i'm not firing him i'll just switch him to a different job yeah yeah that's it's insane and you know you wake him up you. I'm sure the upstairs bathroom, maybe that's in their bathroom or something. And I bet it's hard not to sit down on the bed because there's a little bit waiting. So it's a tough situation because if you're working on a room and you're like,

hey, just hang there for a second. Let me tighten this. And as you tighten there and you're like, it, just hang there for a second. Let me tighten this. And as you tighten there and you're like, it's hard not to sit on that bed. Yeah. But you should have the restraint not to sit on it. And then, I mean, to fall asleep is just on, this guy's on another planet. Well, then you think, well, dude, let me just close my eyes for like 10 seconds. Yeah.

Right. And then, yeah, then 30 minutes later you wake up like, oh, no. I'll tell you what, that nap was probably unreal. Yeah. I mean, that's a nap where you fall, where you're like, if you, you're a nap so out that you know you shouldn't be sleeping. Yeah. On this. I bet he woke up and was more productive than ever, though.

It's almost worth it to have him take a nap. Yeah, but it was his shoes off the bed. Yeah. I mean, it's just a matter of just. In the bed is such an invasion. Let's be professional. Right. Sleep on the floor like the rest of us.

I'd say just send him this clip, Cynthia. We're handling it. I think we can handle it. Just give him a little tap. Go, hey, dude, can I get you a coffee? Yeah. Do that sort of thing. I need a coffee.

Yeah. I need a coffee? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Have you met my friend Anita Coffee? Yeah. Yeah.

Maybe say that. Yeah. It you met my friend Anita Coffey? Yeah. Yeah. Maybe say that. Yeah. It's, yeah. Put some shaving cream on his hand, tickle his nose, and then when he hits it, he goes, oh, you're sleeping in my house, dude. Put his hand in hot water. Yeah, you're supposed to be working and you're sleeping. What would you do in this situation? Because you should tell her you would.

Dusty would fly off the house. I don't know. I think, yeah, I mean, I've never had people really in my house doing stuff like this. There you go. But I think if I... So what you're getting at,

this is on Cynthia. Yeah. It's actually your fault, Cynthia. Yeah. Because what are you doing having people in your house? Because it'd be hard for me because when people are in my house,

like I'm up on them. Like I'm around them the whole time. You stand there in the bathroom with them? Yeah. I'm like, what's going on in here? You're in there while they're working. It'd be tough for the guy to fall asleep on my bed. What's going on here, bud? He would have to do it in front of you.

Then that guy's aggressive. A guy who looks you in the eyes and lays down in your bed and takes a nap. Oh, yeah. That's a guy. That's a guy that you might have to give him the keys to your home. Yeah. Because he might own your house.

Yeah, I think you got to kick that guy out of the house. Oh, yeah. You got to go, you're out of here, dude. Yeah. You're out of here. Yeah, why don't you head on? Why don't you pray a long day while you head on home? Yeah, you don't even have to be rude to him, but you got to go,

hey, you got to wake up and you also got to leave. I don't want you back here. And then you call the boss and you go you head on home. Yeah. You don't even have to be rude to him, but you got to go, hey, you got to wake up and you also got to leave. I don't want you back here. And then you call the boss and you go, the one guy fell asleep. I don't want that guy working on this anymore.

The guy shouldn't have even been touching my bed, but he was also, he was asleep on it. Fell asleep in the bed. Yeah. That's crazy. Yeah.

Yeah. Oof. $20 broke ski. Jeez. I'm a new viewer. All right. In episode five about sports, Mr. Weber said an adult should not wear MLB jerseys. What happened between that episode and the Eclipse one?

Love the show. Wow. I don't remember saying that, but you know what? I mature. I mean, that's a difference of about three years. Yeah, that is the opposite of maturing. What do you mean? To go from saying you shouldn't wear one to then wearing. I've matured in that I'm more open-minded than I was originally.

I think also what the reality of that is, episode five, that Aaron could not fit in an MLB jersey. And I think to justify that, I go, you know what? Maybe nobody should wear them. If I can't do it, nobody should. I could see that. Also, if you're listening, Aaron's wearing a video game hat right now. So take that into account.

What is the hat? They sent me this hat. MLB did? Yeah. MLB the yeah how about that MLB the show it's a video game yeah

because I talked about it it's a good hat yeah thanks man yeah so there you go so he changed the skinnier

we can all we talked about this we can all change this weekend you can evolve on stuff right you can have you can have opinions

about stuff and not reading this little we talked were talking about a book, though. I did audio listen just for a little bit, and then I've stopped. But, yeah, this idea that your opinion should always be changing. Yeah. So you should always, like, if someone says anything, you should be like, right now, it's like this. But, yeah, you could have, politically, you could be like,

I've been a bunch of different things always throughout because it's like this reasons this and that reasons that, and you're just trying to learn. So nothing should be so definite. Yeah, we don't have to be put in boxes. Yeah, exactly. But it's hard not to do that. And I would put myself in a box. Yeah. You know?

Yeah, I feel like the baseball jersey is the most mature of all the jerseys to wear. It's buttoned up. It's buttoned. You can wear a shirt underneath it. It's almost like a shirt. Yeah. The basketball jersey is the hardest one. I mean, you almost can't even do it.

Yeah. He wants to talk you into it. NFL jerseys are brutal, too. Would you wear a basketball jersey? No. With a white t-shirt underneath it? I would basketball shirt? No. Or a white t-shirt? I would never expose my shoulders with a white t-shirt underneath. 30 episodes.

Well, look, if somebody gave me a jersey with my name on it, I'd wear it. But I'm not wearing it. It lasted one second. Isn't there a Weber basketball player? Chris Weber? Chris Weber. Yeah, he spells it differently. But yeah, he's also a Michigan guy.

That'd be tough. Yeah. He's also a Michigan guy. That'd be tough. I would wear a Michigan jersey. But I would never wear it exposed. You do a show for Notre Dame, they give you a basketball jersey with your last name on it. Yeah, I'd put it on. And they say, you cannot wear a shirt or anything. I would say, what kind of show do you want this to be?

Why are you asking me to do this? What would you be like? How big is this? I would go, I'd like show do you want this to be? Why are you asking me to do this? Would you be like, well, how big is this? I would go, I'd like to see how big the jersey is. Because I don't think your shoulders and arms would look bad, but you just don't want people to see in the hole on the side. That's my fear of wearing a tank top. It comes in too much right there.

Yeah, just like it stretches out a little bit and then you just see, like, if you just saw my chest and you're like, well, it looks like a, you're like a bag is in there. I can't tell you the last time my shoulder saw daylight. It's been a long time.

Yeah. But you said you swim without, but wait, didn't we swim one day? Yeah. For like an hour. But I'm talking about just letting it fly. And that was a while.

That was a while ago. That was last July 4th. Yeah. That's probably the last time you think your shoulders have... Seen, yeah. Seen daylight. Wow. Wow.

I had my shirt off today in the yard. You defended Morgan Wallen recently for his jersey thing. Well, you got to be careful throwing that sentence around. Yeah. Who knows what he's going to do by the time this comes out next week? Do a chair off a roof. He took some heat because he wore a baseball jersey from another team. And I just said, listen, we're all adults here.

If you're playing in a team stadium and you sell it out and they give you a jersey with your name on it, maybe throw it on for a song. I don't think that's crazy. No, I agree with you. And you said you'd wear anybody's jersey except USC and somebody else. And Michigan was the other one. Yeah. You would wear a Michigan state.

Probably kind of funny at this point. I can't think Michigan state would ever give you a jersey. You may not be allowed to buy one. Michigan State. Probably kind of funny at this point. I can't think Michigan State would ever give you a jersey. You may not be allowed to buy one. Michigan State. I feel like you trashed Michigan State. Yeah, you trashed Michigan State. Oh, yeah. That's where Bob Feller went.

Did they even go to college back then? No. They didn't have college back then. Straight to the majors. Yeah, so what do they mean? So he's a phenom that he just skipped. They're like, well, he had nowhere to go. He just played high school, I guess. High school straight to the majors. Yeah, so what do they mean? So he's a phenom that he just skipped. They're like, well, he had nowhere to go. He just played high school, I guess.

High school straight to the pros. So he made his pro debut at 17, but he was playing baseball at 15. Yeah. Pretty crazy. Triple crown winner. Wow. He was a triple crown winner, and he's a pitcher? Where does it say that?

Triple crown. Maybe triple crown for baseball? Oh yeah, that's crazy, dude. I know, but that's leading home runs, RBIs, and what is it? And something else. As the pitcher. That's insane.

Oh, the pitching triple crown, which is leading in ERA wins and strikeouts. Okay. I was going to say, I've never heard about him being a hitter. You've been in a lot of feller conversations? Down at the Legion

bar. You go down there. Down at the VFW. Well, they ain't ever brought up nothing about feller being an old batter. Yeah, it's too tough to get it in over all the pitching conversation. When you were talking about comedy

and how things have changed, it made me think of two other celebrities that it's hard to imagine they're still alive because it's such a bygone era. Mel Brooks. Oh, he's still alive. Yeah. And Dick Van Dyke. Yeah, Dick Van Dyke. Dick Van Dyke feels crazy. Yeahgone Era. Mel Brooks. Oh, he's still alive. Yep. And Dick Van Dyke.

Yeah, Dick Van Dyke's crazy. Dick Van Dyke feels crazy. Yeah. Yeah. But I think Mel Brooks doesn't feel as, because I think he's been doing stuff. Dick Van Dyke's been doing, you see him though more, you know.

Yeah, he's still around, but it's come from different times. I mean, from Mary Poppins. Well, the Dick Van Dyke show was even before that, I think. That was black and white too, huh? Yeah. Yeah. That's, too. Yeah. Yeah. That's pretty wild.

Yeah. Anybody still alive that was a star of a black and white TV show seems pretty insane. Yeah. Ron Howard. But he was a kid. He was the star to me. Yeah. He wasn't the star, though.

John Wayne. When did John Wayne die? I think last week years and years ago but I mean did he see the 21st century Clint Eastwood has been doing stuff

the whole time but it's wild that Clint Eastwood you know was the star of these really yeah 1979

1979 you were just born yeah I was just a few months old but like so I was alive John Wayne could have held me as a baby. He could have.

I'd be surprised if he crossed paths. Yeah, he was 71. But to think Clint Eastwood was a star of the good, the bad, and the ugly, and still making movies. Yeah, and also in trouble with the curve. Clint Eastwood is exactly one. When was he born? To your point, he's still making movies,

so he seems more relevant. He is, but it's like 1930. When you think about that, when was Good and the Bad and the Ugly out? Like 1960 or something. Yeah, see, that seems wild. I mean, he was 14,

or he was 11 when World War II started. Golly. I mean, what a wide range of movies he's had, too. It's like he's, you know, like Dirty Harry, where he's like a cop, and then he's Any Which Way You Can, where he's like a boxer. Escape from Alcatraz

where he's a prisoner. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. I'm just reading Wikipedia. The Mule where he's a mule. Yeah.

Well, that Escape from Alcatraz was a big movie. He directed American Sniper, unreal movie. I never saw Sully, but then Richard Jewell

is a good one too. Sully? Sully? Sully? Sully. But then Richard Jewell is a good one, too. Sully? Sully? Sully? Sully? Sully? You said Sully like only. Sully.

Sully. Sully? It's about Sully Sullenberg. Sully. It could not be more like it's spelled. Sully. Am I not saying it? That's right. Sully.

Sully. Sully. Sully. We said it enough that maybe I'm wrong. Sully. Sully. Sully. We said it enough that maybe I'm wrong. Sully. Sully. That's all you got to do is stick to your convictions. And then that other person starts going, I don't know.

It was like Eric when we were playing our tennis ball baseball. And so he gets two fouls, which is strikes. And then he misses and then it's an out. And he was like, but the first two were fouls. They're not counted as strikes. And you're like, no, they count as strikes. You can't strike out on a third one as a foul. But then he goes, no, I don't think.

And enough that I go, am I? And then I was like, you know, like in my head, I'm like, dude, maybe I'm wrong. I've been watching the game. Yeah, I was like, maybe you're allowed to have fouls, and they count as nothing. But he was wrong. Sully.

Sully. Sully. Sully. That's how she said it. What's his name? You see that movie Sully? Sully Sullenberg. Sully Sullenberg. I don't know what his real first name is. What was Sully. That's how she said it. What's his name? You see that movie Sully? Sully Sullenberg. Sully Sullenberg.

I don't know what his real first name is. What was Sully? Is that the Tom Hanks movie? Yeah. Yeah, that's where they land the plane. Was Million Dollar Baby an overrated movie or what? Never saw it. I mean, I don't know anyone who likes it because it's so sad.

Yeah. His name is Chesley, so I'd probably go by Sully as well. Sully Sullenberger. I'll tell you, Chesley Sullenberger. Chesley's a tough name. Chesley? Yeah. Chesley Sullenberger.

Chesley Burnett Sullenberger III. That sounds like a pilot, though. Were you still in New York when that happened? Yeah. Did you see it in the sky? No, but I saw it on the news. Wow. No, I didn't see it in the sky.

That's incredible. But I did want to. It was like, I was like, oh, wait, I could go over and see. Like, you could go over there and see it in the water. And you get out and he's like, my name's Suli. Yeah. We love you, Suli. Yeah. That becomes the water. And you get out and he's like, my name's Suli. We love you, Suli. That becomes the thing. Suli Sulenberger.

They interview Nate on the news. Suli Sulenberger here. What does the top say? What? It says, in office. Oh, he was in office? I guess that's when he... He was the permanent representative Of the US to the International Civil Aviation

Organization He was like our ambassador That's pretty good so once he landed one in the water They're like alright You can represent us now He goes what do you feel He goes Landed in the river

That's a solution to everything So they had to get rid of him This guy always wants to land Puted in the river. That's a solution to everything. So they had to get rid of him because they were like this guy always wants to land put it in the Hudson. The AC's out on the floor. Landed in the water. Bring it down.

He's trying to get rid of runways and just do water landings on everything. He seems like the kind of guy that would tell you every story he'd go well when I landed in the Hudson they would all start that way.

All right. Oh, yeah. Which I went to. Yeah. Yeah. Joe List was at a bar or something, and a person came and sat down, and then they just started talking. He goes, where are you?

She goes, I was on that plane that landed in the Hudson River today. Wow. Yeah. Whoa. Just was sitting like that. He believes them? I mean, yeah. They had luggage and it was wet.

That's not true. I took the new drink. No, but yeah. It said, yeah. I mean, I think you could feel it. I think you could tell if someone's and i don't know if someone does if people are that quick to go i'm gonna go get a free beer yeah or something my uncle is a marine does not follow sports at all knows nothing about sports he's at a bar years ago he's sitting down at the bar by himself a guy sits down next to him and they just kind of nod at each other don't talk they

both drink a beer don't even talk to each other the guy leaves so my uncle's sitting there the bartender comes up and goes oh my god how do you know him he's like who was it it's peyton manning oh really at the bar mom had no idea who he was well and the guy as peyton was walking out he said he looked at my uncle and said thanks man yeah Just to have a guy like not hound him. Oh, yeah. At the bar. Yeah. Could it have also not been Peyton Manning?

Probably. Probably. But it's a good story if it is. It is a good story. I sat next to a guy on the plane and he is an older guy and he had all his stuff on the little tray that we get to split. So I kind of just started sliding my cup in there, you know, like pushing his stuff over. Yeah.

Cause I'm like, this is our tray to split here. And then he goes, oh, you got enough room? I'm like, well, not yet. And then, uh, so it started off kind of irritated between us. And then he had this huge ring that had a star on it. And I was like, oh, quite the ring you got there. And then he kind of, i was like okay so we never talked the rest of the thing and then when he got up he had like a new york mets thing on his

bag so i'm i guess in this guy was some kind of new york mets guy and then we got uh no no no no houston uh houston astros okay with the star it was nolan ryan yeah and uh Yeah. And then I get off the plane. I get off before him. There's like all these like, there's like all these state troopers and cops and different people waiting for somebody to get off.

And I think, oh, it must be, you know, the guy that I was sitting next to. So I'm like, so I waited to see him to come out to see what they were going to do.

And then I stood there for a long time and then finally he came out and they were not waiting for him they were waiting for like an old man that was in world war ii like a real veteran old real old man got off and they all kind of cheered for him and i was like okay i don't know what this is about but did you find out who the baseball player was? No. Was it a World Series ring that you saw? I think so. It was a really big ring. Was it Astros, maybe?

Yeah. He was big, but he was old. He would have been a coach on the team or something. Was it a black guy? No, it was a white guy. Okay. Well, he might have played. He just would be old now.

Yeah. Oh, yeah. Maybe they won one back in the day. It doesn't mean yet. I don't think they did. They didn't invent rings. Who was the star? Well, the Astros. Astros, now. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Maybe they won one back in the day. Doesn't mean, yeah. They just didn't. I don't think they did. They didn't invent rings. Who was the star? Well, the Astros.

Astros, yeah. Yeah. Because he had that Astros thing on his back. So they've only won a ring in 2017 and 2022. So if you saw him with a World Series ring. What city were you flying to? Lafayette, Louisiana from Dallas. Okay.

Hmm. I'll look into this. Yeah. Who's from Lafayette? Because from Dallas. Okay. Hmm. I'll look into this. Yeah. Who's from Lafayette? Because maybe he's from there. Oh, yeah. Because why would he be going to Lafayette? Yeah.

Let's get to the bottom of this. I mean, it kind of. If he was at the show, he decided not. Sometimes they hand those rings out to like, you can be a trainer on the team or like working. Was he in first class? He was in first class. Did he look like an athlete or more like a suit and tie kind of guy?

He looked like he could have been an athlete, but he could see at first I was thinking he must be a football player. And I thought it was like a Dallas Cowboys. And so I was thinking maybe he was part of the team in the nineties. And then I used to work with this guy, Stu Barber who played on the bills way back. So I used to work with this guy, Stu Barber, who played on the Bills way back. So I want to talk to him. And pesticide?

Yeah. Stu was like, you know, retired from the NFL and just kind of doing this job. But I was like, nah, Stu's much older than this guy. I was thinking this guy was probably in his 50s or 60s. Was he hitting on a trash can during the flight? Stu would be in his 80s now. But then I saw it was Astros. Okay.

Anyway. We'll find this out. Yeah. Do some sleuthing for us. Yeah. Yeah. See if we can. But it was fine.

And you know what? Oh, this is what I also I did. I forgot I did this. He doesn't know I did this. He ordered a drink and he went to the bathroom and the flight attendant brought the drink and it was chipped. His glass was chipped and it was like split all the way down the side. Is that why you're drinking into the microphone? And she was chipped and then broken all the way down the side like richard yeah yeah i don't know why he got bored of the story and so i told the flyer and i go hey this

is not my drink but it's chipped here so she oh she goes oh thank you and she took it and then replaced it and he never knew that happened but i potentially saved that man from cutting his mouth yeah i would have brought it up when he sat back down just so you know yeah a lot's happened up here since yeah yeah i got you a whole different cup but i went ahead and just let him have it because he already had been taking up the whole tray and i i don't i don't care for that where you pull up the astros coaching staff yeah what's the tray you know like you know when you're when you pull the tray down when coaching staff? Yeah, what's the tray? You know, like, you know, when you're. When you pull the tray down. When you're first class, you got that little thing.

Oh, in the middle? Yeah. He took the whole middle part. He was taking the whole thing, and I just kind of like, you know, it was like his stuff was like here. Yeah. And I just kind of came in like this. Yeah.

And made enough room for myself. Yeah. You know, I wasn't rude about it, but I was like, I need to set this down. Yeah. Y'all have to share a tray? No, it's got two cup holders. So he is just kind of using both. It's probably an older man that doesn't realize, that's not thinking about,

like, hey, you're not supposed to just use whatever. This guy. Not that guy. Would you recognize him if I pulled him up? Maybe. He was a fatter guy than that guy. you recognize him if maybe he was a fatter guy than that okay let me type in fat astros coach yeah i think ai will ai to ask ai like who would have flown to uh what the manifest in lafayette okay i gotta dig through this what's

that what's that uh it could be an older guy and then uh fat guy quarter i don't think that's him i'll dig in a little bit later okay yeah yeah we'll find this out yeah uh bradley paul nate nairn's weight loss journey really inspired me to get my act together and today i'm happy to report i lost 100 pounds in the last eight months that's nuts too wow keep up the great work love the inspirational podcast well that's awesome bradley thank you you've inspired me to lose the weight i've gained back you know what i'll do it with you let's do it yeah it's a race to 180 race to 180 no what do you want to do i'll do i'll do you want to you want to get'll do I'll do you want to

you want to get on a little let's do it because I'm out of control right now well I'm back to I'm above 195

I'm at 195 wow so bet to race 30 pounds 30 pounds oh I can drop 30 pounds yeah but it's going to be

30 it's yeah it's 50 yeah probably yeah 50 all right I don't but I would I lose no no no 30 for you it's yeah it's 50 yeah probably yeah 50 all right i don't but i would i lose no 30 for you it's proportionate to where we're starting 50 for you 30 for you okay starts tomorrow so let's get mcdonald's tonight all right i already told harper we'll get mcdonald's

so we're getting let's let's go eat mc. Let's go inside, eat alone. Different tables. Not even facing each other. What are you going to eat tonight? I don't think I'm going to eat again. I think lunch was good. Well, why would you not have a little fun? Because I can tell myself that every night. You know how many nights I go? Tomorrow's.

My whole life is about tomorrow. Let's have a last supper tonight. Let's get after it. I'm on death row. I did that every night this weekend. All right. I like it. Because last time it helped me when I challenged.

And we had a little bit of accountability on here. Body weight over there. And then. Body weight. That's a good one. Body weight. Thanks. I like that.

How do we know How much you weigh right now though Are you guys able You got a scale in here We can step on Honesty Is he Do you want to

Step on a scale Or is it like Are you like a woman And don't want us to know I can tell you what I weigh Oh what do you weigh Yeah I weigh like 275 right now Yikes

Now episode 5 Episode 5 I was 330 Yeah 75 right now. Yikes. Now, episode five, episode five, it was 330. Yeah. Oh, yeah. You were crazy. You trimmed it down. Me and you've done

this similar weight thing where we lost it and then we have a lot of it back, but it doesn't look as bad as it did because it just was packaged wrong

it was redistributed it was redistributed or we've done good with the beard and so it kind of like everybody's like no you're fine you're like nah it's uh if you got under the hood yeah i just got a nice haircut right now yeah yeah if you yeah yeah you made us both put – how about if, yeah, we have to put a basketball jersey on? Oh, dude. That might not be comfortable in 2050, though. I mean – Cheers. A ton 50.

I didn't mean to say 2050. I'm saying like you might even if you lose 50 pounds if you lose 50 pounds though dude yeah you'll look

great you're gonna look great yeah well then you could do it because it's like you're so big that it doesn't

you there won't even be any shadow you know but if you're 2025 I think you're having enough shadows 2025

2025 I don't know I don't know why I keep saying But if you're 2025, I think you're having enough shadows. 2025. 2025. I don't know why I keep saying 2025. Well, it's because you're looking at him. All right, body weight. Let's see you back off, buddy. Yeah, I'd be 225. You feel pretty comfortable wearing the healthiest, I don't know about healthiest, the most in shape I've ever been.

Senior year of high school. Coming out of summer for football. 215. Yeah. You got pictures of that? I have a picture somewhere of it. At your lowest, like maybe around your wedding? That was my lowest of my adulthood.

Well, yes, what I meant. Did you ever get down to 225? Heck no. Okay. Lowest I've ever get out of two 25? Heck no. Okay. Lowest I've gotten in the last few years, like two 60. What's it? Yeah.

What's a number that like you, you know, like 25 would be incredible. Yeah. So you two 25. Yeah. Yeah. That'd be 50 pounds.

So 30 pounds for me would be one 65. I'll go one six. You know, what were you like? Hello world. Hello world. I was one 60. And you're one 92 right now. up i'll go 160 you know what were you like hello world hello world i was 160 and you're 192 right now oh 190 yeah yeah i've been eating too though i get it though i mean

it's like i had a joke i was doing a little bit for about being in between belt holes you know and then i was like think i was like gonna do it this weekend i was like going to do it this weekend. I was like, nah, I'm firmly into that new bell call now. I'm not. That joke's not even real anymore. Yeah. So, yeah, I've been eating, so I get it. They said it needed to be a minute. Yeah, I think I weighed myself this morning.

I might be 195. So you'd be down to 165. 165. Let's get a scale in the room. Yeah, we can. Yeah. Well, you know you feel good saying that's get a scale in the room. Yeah, we can. Yeah. Well, do you know

you feel good saying that's where you're at? Yeah. Yeah. I'm fine with 195. You can drop 10, 15 pounds pretty easy.

Oh, yeah, yeah. Just, you know. Sometimes I just fluctuate that with a good night's sleep. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah? Yeah. Oh, that's a good segue

into the next topic. Look at that. You're not the only guy that can do segues. Yeah. You're right. You're right. Today's about flying insects. Wait,

do you want to do the rest of these comments? No, no, let's just go ahead and get into it. I was making sure because it's three pages. It's never three pages. I know. I'm just making sure we are.

I know, but it was, yeah, we're trying to bring it up and just I know. I'm just making sure we are. I know, but it was, yeah, we're trying not to bring it up. We're going to just move on. I'm sorry. He did the one thing that you've never done, but you decided to do it today, which was try to run this podcast. Drinking into the mic.

Drinking into the mic. Look, dude. He's getting arrogant. High T Aaron over here. This week we're talking about sleep let me ask you guys how long when your head hits the pillow does it take you to fall asleep it uh it probably takes me too long but it's because laura falls asleep i mean in a second but i mean i mine's i'm just like i'm sure my brain goes crazy but then i I'm also like, I'm probably drinking. I'm not drinking a coffee right now.

It's 6. 20 p.m. You know? And like. You think that'll affect you to all the way to up to when you want to go to bed? I don't think. I mean, this is the only coffee I've had today. And there's half a cup left.

But I've been about to have a, you know, McDonald's. I'll have Diet Coke and all that stuff. Last night, the reason I'm at one at a five, eight, half a pint or probably a pint is Eddie's ice cream. And tons of chocolate syrup and that in a pretty big, and I just, and it was like, you know, where it's at the amount where it's like too much, but then you're like, well, if I don't do it all, I'm going to leave not enough for the next time. So you're like, just might as well irritated.

Yeah. So I was like, might as well just go to the top and then just have one good run because I'll start tomorrow. That's what I thought. And then, uh, so, you know, so then I went and ate that and then had a bag of Skittles and then went to bed. The odds on this bet are moving so much right now. The odds makers are like, take it off the board.

Well, sometimes you got to hit rock bottom, you know? So you got to be like, this is- Yeah, that's a tough rock. I mean- And you got to find out where rock bottom is. Yeah. And I'm mad that my taste or

were that I want to be like how come I cannot you can tell you're not even enjoying the food when you're like I can eat ice cream and then be like

you know what else I can use a bag of Skittles these are two things that have never even talked to each other before and you're following and I'm with each other yeah skittles meet ice you ever chew as a kid you ever chew gum and eat skittles at the same time no i used to do that i did that one time probably by accident i was chewing the gum and then i would eat the skittles and then

with my mouth i would wrap the gum around the skittle and then bite into the skittle and eventually i broke down the integrity of the gum and the Skittle and then bite into the Skittle. And eventually I broke down the integrity of the gum. And the gum just kind of fell apart. Well, gum will do that eventually. Yeah. If you leave it in long enough. It'll just become, I mean, it'll feel like a spider web in your mouth. You just got to spit it out.

You told me a trick to not eat late at night is to chew gum. I told you that. I think you maybe said Eric said that or. Yeah. Yeah. But you shared it on this podcast. I thought, Oh,

that's a good idea. I got some gum. Yeah. For two a night. And I was like, this gum's good, but who else would be good? Some candy.

So as soon as it's lost its flavor, I spit that gum out. Eat candy. Yeah. Gum is good to, you know, just kind of be you want to be chewing gum you'll be chewing something they say it can mess up your digestion too because as you chew your stomach is getting stomach acid ready to digest what you're eating

your stomach knows your mouth is chewing yeah it's like the cicadas your your glands your all your little uh glands in here know what they try to, your taste buds try to get an idea. They're like, oh, okay, we know what this is. We'll get these things ready to digest. So I can do it even without gum if I just get going? Yeah, I mean, it might, like they say, some people say like if you're doing juices,

like if you just drink juices that you should chew the juice so that you have some stomach acid to help break it down but not all people say that just some people say some people i can't talk people i've never heard chew the juice before i can't well you know i believe that people are saying videos um well it's maybe that let me oh it's working its way on the instagram that reminds me i want to see if i can find this comment that i read. Well, keep looking, look for that Nolan Ryan video real quick. Yeah. What Aaron, how does it take you to fall asleep?

Uh, I'll be not too long, 15 minutes, maybe I'll prolong it by looking at my phone or listening to stuff. But if I really am tired and lay down, I can fall asleep pretty quickly. But mine's, I take, uh, trazodone. I take some tired and lay down, I can fall asleep pretty quickly. But mine's, I take

Trazodone. I take some to fall asleep at night. Like Zequil. You can take Valerian root. It's a little, you can get it a little tincture. Do you grow it? That's supposed to help you. I don't. I do have some seeds for it. I've not tried to grow it yet. But it can help you

go to sleep. You just buy it at a regular store. Yeah. What's the other? Ambien? Melatonin. Melatonin's one. but it can help you go to sleep. You just buy it at a regular store. Yeah. Okay. But valerian. Yeah. What's the other? Ambien? Melatonin.

Melatonin's one. Ambien people take. Melatonin's a natural chemical. So is valerian and melatonin. Ambien, they say, can do crazy things. Crazy things. You'll wake up on a bridge. Yeah. You know?

No, yeah. And like, yeah, trezodone's not ambient. But it's like, I think, one, it's probably in between melatonin and that, I guess. But it's like, you know, it's like when you go to the doctor, I want to, there's all this stuff where you're like, I shouldn't be doing this. I'm eating so much stuff that's making me, you know, I'm like, I have trouble falling asleep. Yeah, because I eat ice cream and Skittles before I go to bed. And then I go lay down. They said six to eight hours before you go to bed, you should lay off caffeine. Yeah.

Six to eight. That's what I try to do too. Because it will mess me up. I also had half a Diet Dr. Pepper with that. Skittles ice cream? I drink a Dr. Pepper with ice cream. Diet. Diet. Easy. Diet. You drink it Dr. Pepper with ice cream. Diet. Easy. It's diet. You're drinking like a Coke

with ice cream. Yeah. Diet Coke. That's wild, though. It's like a float. But I just take a few sips. He's making a float. Like the way you sipped your Diet Coke today. Yeah. I don't, I'll drink out of a small bottle. I could maybe just drink the top little. I just want a couple tastes. I crushed that Diet Coke, though.

That I told you I only wanted like a half. I drank the whole thing. It's a very small Diet Coke. Yeah. I had not had Diet Coke in a long time. There are a few things better than a crisp Diet Coke on a hot day. I did enjoy that. I don't, you know, it's got aspartame in it, which is supposed to be really terrible.

A little aspartame there. Now it's like, I'm going to kill you. Yeah. I've had the most of it. Yeah. And look at me. His body's 4% aspartame. But you know, if I get like nauseous, a Coke most of it. Yeah. And look at me. His body's 4% aspartame.

But, you know, if I get, like, nauseous, a Coke will really help. Yeah. You know? Yeah. That was my chair. You want to inject a Coke? It just reminded me when you guys were talking about that. It said, this guy goes, love me some Dusty.

I do like what he says. I do like that he he says you can't believe everything you're told while proceeding to believe things he has told by youtube videos and other conspiracy websites but that's just enough all right so he goes on to say nice things but uh i don't believe he says believe things and all i say is don't believe everything yeah all right so come on guy you're not against belief as a concept. Right. Right. You know, it's like sometimes YouTube videos and TikTok videos for me are like, like this. We're sharing ideas, you know?

So I, sometimes I just have to go to the internet to find people that think like me. Right. Right. You know? Yeah. I get that. But I think he's making the joke about, you know, it's like you're just where you trust to where you listen. Yeah, but he's just got an incorrect premise.

And I meant to read it weeks ago, but I forgot. Yeah. You found that cute up? He's probably happy compliment you. You don't even read the compliments. You just trash him. Well, I'll say. You don't say his name, though.

Look, this guy says, Dusty's my favorite comic, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. But. But. But. say. You don't say his name though. Look, this guy says, Dusty's my favorite comic, blah, blah, blah. But, but, but. He does say, it's just another reason why he is awesome and adds an edge to a straight-laced podcast. Love his musical taste as well. Takes a shot at us.

He does. I think that needed context for what the front said. It should be on your website. I think that's something that you don't know how to take care of. That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said about me i give it to ryan mcclintock that's his name yeah it's good so that's a i like it but i just want him to know i don't believe i don't watch youtube and go well i believe that now and i you know it's like go to tiktok to believe that yeah. I'm not mad at the guy.

That's why I didn't comment. I wanted to save it for the podcast. Social media is like, because I like looking at it. I don't have Instagram on my phone. I have that Instagram for a while on my phone. And then, but it's not really Instagram. But like, then there's a Twitter. I was kind of just looking at some for news or just whatever.

And I mean, it's or just whatever. And, but it, I mean, it's just garbage now. Oh yeah. It's like, I like the more and more you're like, it, this is pointless.

It's these same videos, you know, it's camp. It, I mean, it's, it's, it's,

uh, trash. It's like trash. Yeah. You know, and there is, I see that there is good stuff, but it's like to find the good stuff is there's just so much trash that you're like what are we doing it is true yeah i watch some

youtube videos like there's this one like tyler zed guy zeducation and he like he just shares memes and then jokes about the memes and i find i love I love it. I watch it all the time, but sometimes I think, what am I watching here? I'm just watching a guy talk about stuff, talk about memes. I'm going to do, but it's so fun.

I, you know, I have a joke about reading, but I want to, I really do want to get into reading and learn more. And, but I found there's this one thing, quick reading.

It's like a course online course john quick or jim or jim quick kwik yeah that's good to start but spelling the word wrong just to get people like you on board with it this is like 21 days and you're supposed to read 300 faster more effective than 20 days it's uh you know and it's like you see reviews on stuff it's like a mix of people it's like he teaches you how to speed read and they're like well speed reading really a thing and why is the air force doing this jim parrallel universe john yeah i think he just that's him he he goes and does talks at places okay so they're not making people in the air

force can't read and they go go take this class no no i think that he's been brought in like he has one of the things is from like alex rodriguez who's like you know we brought him in for our company that you know he's like uh you know a talker too and uh yeah i don't know if this is going to be it but it's like one of those things it's great it's one of those things that you always see that you're like, it's not just speed reading, it's smart reading. It's about retention. People have commented how your reading has improved, though, over this podcast. Yeah, right.

But I mean, I don't comprehend it, you know. Yeah, you comprehend. I mean, you know. When you read comments, you know what you're reading. You're not just reading the words. Yeah, but that'd be like music. I mean, you know. When you read comments, you know what you're reading. You're not just reading the words. Yeah, but that'd be like music. I don't comprehend music. I don't even understand how there could be a story.

I'm looking at it like there's a detachment to it. Like, I have no idea what the words. I can go to the saddest song, but if it's fun, sounds fun, I could play it at my wedding. Like bluegrass and i wouldn't even sad music but yeah i wouldn't even know i'm almost like that too i would i would just be like i don't know what you're talking about you're like that song's a dark song that's what music is like laura you know stuff with harper uh i you know laura's got to

kind of i'm like you got to keep on the music side. You know, some of these songs, I don't even know. You're just going off vibes. Yeah. Yeah. It'd be like a,

you know, cause some of the younger songs, these, you know, a lot of these pop songs, I mean, they're getting, they're crazy. Yeah.

I would say just not listen to any of those. I mean, I agree, but you're going to hear just in popular culture, it's called pop. You can't stop a kid from listening to music. They're going to be, they're going't stop like they're gonna be they're gonna be they're gonna hear stuff and so the harbor actually likes you know she listens the some lumineers because uh they're on the thing but laura likes music so they have a good music

you know i'll sit driving the radio's never on when I'm in the car. So, uh, you drive in quiet. Yeah. My dad does that too. Yeah. It's real kind of psycho stuff, but it's, you know what I mean?

Yeah. Oh yeah. I'll drive. But that's what my dad does. Yeah. My dad doesn't. Now I can get into, I listened to music on the way home last night.

Yeah. Cause it was like, you know, just kind of, I can be in the mood, you know, I like listening to music, but, uh kind of i can be in the mood you know i like listening to music but uh if someone else is in the car i'm gonna have it off yeah my dad says he he likes

to work out things in his head yeah he's driving so i like that i don't know yeah i'm like i think you need to relax a little bit yeah take some time away from these problems. Yeah. You could start the Nate Bargettzi school for kids who don't read good. Yeah. Yeah. I watched Zoolander on the plane yesterday. Oh, yeah. Remember that? Yeah.

Just when I was at the Titans thing, I saw the model that they had, and I made that joke. You know, where he said, how are you going to learn to read if they can't even fit inside the school? They had that kind of model for the stadium. You know, it's funny. I've never seen Zoolander. Oh, well. That joke would have been funnier then. Those were two great references to it. It's the same

scene though. That's what's funny. I think I've seen parts of it. I don't know why. It's funny. I would not say it's a great movie, but it is funny. Yeah. You think it's a great movie? No. I don't know if it's great, but it's funny. It is funny. American Airlines had think it's a great movie? No. I don't know if it's great but it's funny. It is funny. American Airlines had a thing

for 90 minutes or less movies. Oh. Like this flight's hour and a half so I'll watch it. Yeah. But there's a reason you've seen Heavyweights and you've seen these other

but you haven't seen that one. I don't think I've seen Heavyweights. Okay. I'll shut up for a little bit. What is that? I don't know what that is. It's about the fat camp. Ben Stiller plays the...

Oh, I would like to watch that. You haven't seen Heavyweights? No. the fat camp? Ben Stiller plays the... Oh, I would like to watch that. You haven't seen it anyways? Is it great? It's awesome. Yeah. I've seen clips of it. It's a fat camp for kids, and they all love going there because they're all fat, and they just are friends. Yeah.

And then Ben Stiller plays a crazy fitness instructor who buys the camp and turns it into an actual weight loss camp, and the kids rebel against him. And it's Ben Stiller versus this group of lovable fat kids. That's great. Yeah, it's awesome. And Jerry Stiller's in it too. Isn't the, if you watch the movie,

you're like, oh, they're not really that fat. I used to have a bit about that where I watch it now and I'm like, some of these kids look alright. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Kenan Thompson, a young Kenan Thompson's in it. And every great fat actor from that generation's in it. It's awesome.

All right, sleep. So they say the healthiest time to fall asleep when your head hits the pillow is 15 minutes. Anything past 30, you got some issues. But if you fall asleep immediately, that means you're sleep deprived, and that's not healthy either. Oh, really? Yeah. You shouldn't fall asleep immediately.

Yeah, Grant, talking about Graham K., he told a story about someone in another comic that they were in the same room. They share a hotel room. They share a hotel room. And, I mean, he he goes why didn't Shane Torres Shane Torres Shane and Graham goes

Shane goes alright goodnight I mean was out which is unbelievable Soder can fall asleep. I think anywhere. Uh, yeah,

I've always had trouble, but I don't think I would have as much, you know, my, I just start thinking and then you, you know, I can have bad days. You know,

there could be days where I'm like, I could be there for a couple hours. And then, but then there's nights where I was very tired last night. And like, I don't think it took me too, too long. Do you you fall asleep watching tv i don't ever want to go to sleep i'd rather be up yeah like i i feel like i'm missing out i love to stay asleep when i wake up i like to stay in bed but i yeah i never want to i never want to go to sleep yeah it's the

opposite if i had the opposite i think we would both be down or wait already probably if we it's the opposite. If I had the opposite, I think we would both be down our weight already. Probably. In the morning, I'm like, I just kind of want to lay there and nothing's really happened yet. But at night, I kind of want to stay up and do things. Hang out. Seinfeld had that joke about how that's the last thing you want to do. Just your hand or the remote's like the last thing that... Vault gets tied. Yeah, because you're like i gotta find something on tv anything uh so there's four stages of sleep stage one's the non-realm sleep where uh last about seven

minutes where your your heart rate and eye movement slow down stage two another non-real sleep with um your heart rate muscles continue to relax. Non there's stage three is also an honor in sleep. The stage four is REM sleep. And this is happens after about 90 minutes after you fall asleep, your eyes move quickly from side to side. So REM stands for rapid eye movement. Yep.

Yeah. And, uh, but don't they call it REM? REM sleep. Yeah. And that's the regenerative. That's the sleep that actually helps you yeah yeah this is when dreaming often happens and um and then you just go in cycles all night long in these four so your eyelids are closed but your eyes are going all over the place

but that's where sleep apnea is you never get to that last level because your brain keeps thinking you're dying so it wakes up that's what an apneic event is when your brain goes we're dying we need to wake up before we choke to death yeah right that's a struggle so i do you remember how many apneic events per hour you had when you took the test i don't't. It's been so long. Yeah. But I was borderline sleep apnea. Okay. So low 20s or something?

That sounds right. Yeah. I was like 38, I think. 38 per hour. So your brain. Every two minutes, my brain goes, this is it. Wow. Your brain is stressed.

Yeah. You wake up mentally drained. Yeah. That's why you don't want to go to sleep. I know people over 100 an hour. Wow. Wow. Diggins.

Diggins. Yeah. So every few seconds, their brain wakes up. So you never get that REM sleep, dude. So you wake up feeling like, I didn't sleep at all. You didn't really. You know? I wore a whoop.

What is that? The band thing that you wear on your wrist. It's like a Fitbit type thing. Fitbit type thing. You know what Fitbit is? Yeah. I've never heard of whoop. W-H-O-O-P.

Surprising. There it is. Yeah. There it is. Oh. There it is yeah there it is uh oh oh i think that's whomp whomp w-h-o-o-n-p whoop there it is whoop i think there's an m in there oh man whoop there it is you're absolutely, but they don't pronounce that. There it is. There it is. What are they talking about?

This is what Dusty Bryce talks about. Party people! Yeah. That song got me going back in the day. Yeah, it's a good one. Like a third grade pep rally. There it is. Yes, sir. Let's raise money.

You know something about how weird it is that we all have to sleep? Even animals? Every living creature sleeps. I bet there's something that doesn't sleep. I don't think so. Bullfrog, they said, they thought didn't sleep because it'll move just as fast at any time. But they're like, nah, it sleeps. Did we ever tell the story about

the aquarium on here? I don't think we ever have. Dusty and I were in Duluth, Minnesota. We went to the Great Lakes Aquarium. Yeah. There's not the nicest aquarium in the world. Good people in there.

I was talking about there being a fountain shut down, and then someone said on the telling i was talking about there being a fountain shut down and then someone said on the uh internet they don't even have a fountain there but it was like a waterfall and like half of the waterfall wasn't working so we saw some fish in there that looked like they might be dead right so dusty and i are chatting we're like maybe these fish maybe they're asleep and then we're like do fish even sleep lucky for us there's a girl standing near us the name tag on said fish expert fish expert yeah we're like great person to go to for all our fish related questions so we walk up and we say random question do fish sleep

and what does she say to us she said i't know. Cause I don't work here at night. Dead serious. We were like, all right. Okay. I mean, that's a great, that's a, that's one of the best answers I've ever heard.

Yeah. I know. Yeah. Yeah. She's like a fish expert of like that room. Right. I know what's going on right now. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. It's like, she goes, I know that fish likes that corner. Like you could go, oh, wait, so no. Yeah. Like you can even ask a real fish questions but you could be like all right what's that one's name yeah and she's like all right perfect but you would ask her and then she would kind of read the plaque of the thing i was like

well you just are you you're not even like an amateur fish expert like what even doing in here? Man, what a good answer. Yeah. Yeah. Everybody go to Duluth Aquarium. Great Lakes Aquarium in Duluth. Great Lakes Aquarium in Duluth. It's fun in there. It's fun.

It is fun. We had a good time. We went in there. There was like a bird cage. And on the door of the bird cage, there was a sign that says, don't leave the door open. The birds will get out. And you're like, are we just running the place? We're responsible for keeping these birds in? Yeah. Yeah. It's a sign that says, don't leave the door open, the birds will get out. And you're like, are we just running the place?

We're responsible for keeping these birds in? Yeah. It was slack in there. Now, have you ever wondered how dolphins and whales that are mammals, how they sleep? I never. Oh, because the mammals, because they got to breathe. Yeah.

Do they lay on their back? No, they go to the top. They float like a submarine. Do they kind of just float like a submarine. Do they lay on their back? No, they go to the top. They float like a submarine. Do they kind of just float like a submarine? Do they do that? I think there is some truth to that. Maybe they just sleep in short intervals. I think there's some truth to that too.

They don't get REM sleep? Yeah. They probably don't do it. They sleep differently. They use two hemispheres in their brain and then the right hemisphere shuts off and then the left eye will close for about four hours. Whoa. And then the right hemisphere shuts off and then the left eye will close for about four hours.

Whoa. And then the left hemisphere shuts off and the right eye closes. So they'll just sleep half their brain and just kind of alternate? And they kind of don't sleep. Are they always, or maybe they're always sleeping?

I mean, I think, yeah, they're technically, they are sleeping, but the other side's alert enough to keep swimming and probably make sure something's done. Yeah. But let's say one of them's half asleep. And going up enough to- And you come up and punch it or something.

It's going to kick back on fully. Yeah. Right? If you have to fight a whale, go to the closed eyes side. Go at night. Yeah. Go at night. Yeah.

And go to the closed eyes side. Yeah. Yeah. Go at night. Yeah. And go to the closed-eyed side. Yeah. Yeah. I thought that was interesting. I didn't know. It is. No, I'm joking. It is.

It's very interesting. Pete Holmes has a joke about sleep and how if aliens came to Earth and you tried to explain it to them, we eat food because we need fuel for our blah, blah, blah. And then at night, we have to shut down for like eight, nine, ten hours every night. It's crazy. And they're like, oh, that sounds boring. He's like, no, because we have little movies in our head that we're the star in. Very often, they're very scary.

See, I think sleep makes total sense. I've seen the Pete Holmes joke. And you got some beefs with it. Yeah. I mean, from a standpoint, if you're like, because if you're very, like, if you're not doing anything, then it doesn't make sense. Because he says that, oh, you need to sleep because you're so tired, because you work so hard. He's like, no, I didn't really do anything. But it's like, if you're actually working, sleep makes total sense. Your body just gets to rest and rejuvenate. Yeah.

But I mean, nowadays, I don't know if anybody's really working. Not much. Like in the sense of it. Yeah, in America. And for comedy, it's fun to make fun of those people. Yeah, yeah. He's not talking about a railroad guy from the 40s. It's also a weird bit to go sleep.

I think it makes perfect sense. But it's, and it's more than resting. Which then comedy wouldn't work out. I don't know, dusty nose. Well,

I get it, but I'm like, to me, sleep just because your body regenerates and things happen at night and there's healing that takes place.

It cleans out toxins in your brain. Yeah, that's why if you're in the hospital, they're like, all right, get some rest. And then they wake you up every 30 minutes. It cleans out toxins in your brain. Yeah, that's why if you're in the hospital, they're like, all right, get some rest.

And then they wake you up every 30 minutes. It's like- You put chemicals in your body. Yeah, put chemicals in your body, take blood from you. It's like, let me sleep a little bit. They're like, we want to make sure you don't get blood clots.

You're like, I'm going to be honest with you. I lay around like this a lot. I'm okay. This is not my first time spending this is what i do yeah i spend the whole day in bed every day i get up at night and and you know but how different would society be how different would our lives be if we didn't need sleep if we evolved to the point where we don't need sleep a third of our life life. It would be so different. I mean, we'd live. Yeah. It's a third of our lives, technically.

Or ideally that we're asleep. And then you just, what do we do at night? I mean. Everything would change. It'd probably be bad. Yeah. Yeah. It would be, what are you going to do at night? You know, it's only bad.

Some people would still sleep. Just there's nothing else to do. What if you couldn't though? If you couldn't sleep. You would go. I bet you would do some of your body where you go and like have to sit in a quiet room and meditate. You'd meditate. You could be much more productive, like you said, but you'd never get to enjoy that feeling of relaxation and rest.

But would you be more productive just because you're awake? I mean, I know when I'm awake, I kill a lot of time throughout the day. Right. But you have the potential to do a lot more. That's the joke that P. Holmes is making. Well, you sleep and even kill time harder. What kills time better than sleep? But I'm guessing if...

You're right. It's like time travel. Yeah. But I'm guessing if you've evolved to the point where you don't need sleep you're not even tired there's no fatigue throughout the day yeah right so let's just like what time of day are you at your sharpest like i don't know like it's a show time right you're like 6 37 that's when like you're going yeah if you were just at that the whole 24 hours think about that that'd be exhausting but it wouldn't be because you don't need sleep i think your body thought experiment is that you don't your body would get beaten up

and wore down a lot more and i think the whole point of this discussion is that that stuff didn't happen. Right. Well, yeah, I know, but just cause you don't need sleep. Does it mean that you're, you need to like,

you need rest. Yeah. Yeah. But you don't, there's no, I got to lay down and take a nap. That's what makes sleep weird. It's more than resting.

It's your, your consciousness changes. Yeah. And an opportunity for us not to be consuming some sort of media you know what i mean because we're on our phones we're looking at something or we're listening to the radio or watching a movie we're always taking it in so first thing you do last thing it's a weird thing i don't think i've ever seen a screen in a dream you ever think about that i'm never looking at a screen in a dream. You ever think about that?

I'm never looking at my phone in a dream. I'm never watching TV in a dream. I bet when your life flashes before your eyes, before you die, I bet even though so much of your life is looking at a phone like this, I bet you don't see any of that. That's interesting. You ever think about that? That's deep. Deaf people sign in their dreams.

Oh, really? No, some have. I'm serious. That's mean. That's mean,'s mean right no it's true it's true come on let's not punch down should they do what like you know if you have a nightmare or something they've been yeah some deaf people sign in their dreams really yeah that's amazing well that makes sense yeah now someone said the way i ran the 40yard dash is the way you run in dreams when someone's chasing you and you can't move. That's how I feel. The people that took your run

and put it in the airport is really good. Yeah, I'm going to pull that. Another one they did with me, Godzilla chasing me after Nate said, I look like a Godzilla movie. I'm pulling it up. I'm pulling it up. Yeah.

Somebody is Brian. mate said, I look like a Godzilla movie. I'm pulling it up. I'm pulling it up. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Somebody. I'm missing. Yeah. He was Brian. That's really good. You'll find the Godzilla one, but that's awesome.

Yeah. I mean, that's like, that does look like how you run in a dream though, right there. Yeah. That's how I feel. I can't get my legs to one. Yeah. I mean, that does look like how you run in a dream, though, right there. Yeah. That's how I feel. I can't get my legs to move. Yeah. I mean, it hurts. It does hurt.

It just, everything hurts. It does. That's really how I feel. I mean, unbelievable. If you're listening. You know what? He does not do that at the airport. So I don't know why he did that.

You'd love to see that urgency at the airport. I would. I love it. That's Matt Pryor who made that for us. That's very good. That's so funny. A couple more. For the record, though, I do like Pete Holmes jokes.

And he's got other jokes. You made your point. You made your point. One joke. You was just a podcast with pete yeah i was just watching it being like you know what i i like sleep though i get it yeah yeah yeah but that's you know do you think you would like the audience member that when you tell a joke they go but i like that but you know we're just talking i would never comment on his video and go, I love sleep, dude. But you'll text him later. Yeah.

But you would also say it on a pretty big, you know, decent-sized podcast. People are listening to this. Well, that's why I want to make sure to know in case he listens that I do like Pete Holmes and I like his jokes. Yeah. A couple more real fast. You can sleep standing up. It's very hard, but some soldiers on nighttime sentry duty, whatever that is, have trained themselves to sleep. Sure, it's a little more serious than just saying whatever that is.

Whatever nonsense they're getting into. World War II, whatever that is. Sentry duty, I'm guessing. The guys had a few bad troubles sleeping when they were in the foxhole during Vietnam, whatever that is. Look at this AI-generated answer. It's the duty of serving as a sentry. Sentry duty is the duty of serving as a sentry, which is a soldier who stations to prevent. It's just a guy who's standing guard somewhere.

Okay. Yeah, on a watchtower or something. Well, they've trained themselves to stand while sleeping. Yeah. Did you ask for AI to be in there? I said, no. I, why sleeping? Yeah. Did you ask for AI to be in there? I said, I just Googled

century of beauty. I think I mentioned last week where Google now gives it to you. Which I'm not, look, they're doing great so far. I don't mind it being at the top. I like it.

Just so you know, AI has not looked at any of these topics yet. We brought that up last week. Yeah. About AI using, helping with topics. We're going to, yeah, we're going to experiment with that.

Look at sleep, you mean? Read that last sentence. Is that like saying how AI would not have chosen sleep as a topic? No, I love sleep as a topic. No, no, I'm talking about, I like sleep. It's just because we talked about it last week. Yeah, we didn't do it. Yeah.

Read that last sentence. For example, teachers may be deployed as sentries at border points to check for illegal transportation of poultry. So look, AI has its limitations. AI is not perfect. I just think that. AI right now. We got teachers checking for illegal poultry. Yeah.

They're smuggling chickens across this here border. Do we not ask enough of teachers? Get these math teachers out here at the border. It's like a detention duty. What are you doing? I got to go. Look for illegal chickens at the border. Is that chicken legal?

At the county border. And just go. It's AI. I think AI, they go. Yeah, it's the gist. Yeah. They go the spirit of the answers there it's not so much about

the exact words yeah they don't know examples what was you calling me last week or what was the what's gonna replace me bot baits

bot baits or something I wouldn't do that yeah got another couple weeks before AI replaces me yeah he's still in there.

We're helping AI right now. AI's like, yeah, you're making fun of me, but I'll do that. It's really a race. You are racing AI. Yeah. So as long as you stay ahead of it. Yeah. The real John Henry of our generation.

The singularity. When that happens. Yeah. That's when they catch us. When people can't tell. But I mean, you know, you're your own thing. I don't think people, I think people are always. Yeah.

I think I'm always going to break some stuff at the table. That's right. That, yeah. That even AI, you know, even when AI does something like that. Yeah. That even the sum of all human knowledge can't get to. Yeah. I agree.

Longest to go without sleep, 18 days. Longest someone did? Yeah. They used to be a Guinness World Record, but they stopped it because it's dangerous. People were dying. I don't know if anyone died,

but they were just afraid somebody would. Maybe they did. 18 days is like... Well, if they died, then you fell asleep. What are you doing on day 12? I don't know.

There was an experiment on a guy. This is back in the 60s, and he stayed awake for 11 days. Did this guy consent to this experiment? Yeah, he was 17 years old. Okay. On day 10, he beat the experimenter in a game of pinball. Oh, so the other guy stunk. Yeah.

The other guy goes, I've been asleep for 11 days. Yeah. Well. What's pinball? They had to wake him up, and he goes, what? What's pinball? Yeah. Pinball. Oh, okay.

It's a song by the Who. Did I say it wrong, or you just don't know what that is? I didn't. I just wasn't. I thought it was like ping pong. I wasn't putting it together. How long have you been awake, though? Yeah.

I am tired. But I just couldn't. When you say you beat him in it, I was picturing them playing each other. Yeah. Dusty. I am tired. But I just couldn't. I just, when you say you beat him in it, I was picturing them playing each other. Yeah. Yeah. What does that make sense? You have scores.

Player one, player two. Yeah, but you know what? Dusty's making some good points here. What are you talking about, bro? You still got to beat the guy you're playing.

You don't beat the guy. But I mean, you know, you get a couple of bad bounces. It's like you're not, you know. It's that ball. That's it.

Yeah. Pinball is like, I was thinking ping pong too. Yeah. Because he's playing against, that's what the thing said. Yeah. Come on.

I'm not blaming you for that. I'm saying, but that is like an AI. That is no different than a teacher guarding illegal poultry. I think whoever writes that example also would defend that one pretty hard. Beach and pinball. What are you talking about? Now, this guy, so he was awake for 11 days, and then he went to sleep, slept for 14 hours,

11 days and then he went to sleep slept for 14 hours and then got up and stayed awake for quite a while like for 12 more hours before he went back to bed i think i would have been sleeping for days yeah i've been wiped out yeah that's crazy dude i slept for i was just looking at my stats because i get all my stats from a c-pad machine i had a good night last night i slept eight hours and 54 minutes last night. That's good. That's a good night's sleep right there. I actually slept well all weekend. I had a theory that we sleep in intervals of three

hours. It's best to get three, six, or nine hours. You are almost at nine. That's my own personal theory. I think that's where REMs... I think we hit those cycles in three hours. I think everybody knows Dusty in this podcast, so it's based on Dusty. That's my own personal theory.

But you hit almost nine hours here, and you feel good today. This is maybe, on the road with you, Nate, it's maybe the best sleep I've ever gotten on a weekend on the road. I slept six hours on Thursday. Friday, I slept seven and a half weekend on the road i slept six hours on thursday friday i slept seven and a half hours saturday i slept six hours does it tell you like uh your rims sleep and stuff uh-huh yeah a little bit i had so like last night you have to cut it on when you cut when you cut it on are you still on your phone or is it like when you cut it on that's what helps is where i put it on. I've kind of

trained my body to go. Because you can't see over it? Because you can't see over it? My eyes aren't covering it. Why? Because of the helmet? Because the guard comes down? I'm not wearing a stormtrooper helmet. That's what I picture. So is it hard to see through the eyes? Like when Darth Vader goes?

Is that why you go? Is that why you left the light on all weekend? Because you didn't know. Yeah. But is it? So, yeah. So you turn good sleep. So you once you put it on, click it on.

I'm out pretty soon. Yeah. After that. And it's just oxygen going into. It's not oxygen. It's just air. Oh, but it would be cool if it you? It's not oxygen. It's just air. Just air. It would be cool if it were oxygen.

Yeah. Yeah. I mean, the air is... There's going to be oxygen in the air. Yeah. But I wonder if it would help you sleep. Like, what if it just helped anybody sleep? I'm sure it would.

Probably would. Yeah. Yeah. But you can't roll over anything. You lay on your back. Yeah. You can figure some stuff out. Oh, yeah.

I lay on my side. Oh, really? You can manipulate it in ways. I mean, the cord's some stuff out. Oh, yeah, I lay on my side. Oh, really? You can manipulate it in ways. I mean, the cord's got some give. Yeah. You just got the cord. Do you ever wake up with the cord wrapped around you? I woke it up in some weird situation.

Yeah, I do. It's just a mess. Yeah. And that's easy. So you see the cords, you're like, you got wild. Yeah. I have a joke about it because Ruth and I both wear seat pads. When we go to bed at night, the lights in our neighborhood dim.

It's like a brownout. You say that on stage? Yeah. And you wake up and it's like a pair of headphones in your pocket. Everything's all tangled up. Eleanor will never need a sleep machine. She'll just lay in y'all's room. Either side, she's just.

sleep machine. She'll just lay in y'all's room. Either side, she's just... Hey, did y'all hear that tornado last night? Nah, we didn't hear it. I mean, just, it's a high tech. Like when you go in your bedroom, it just looks like a high tech. Yeah. We're very

futuristic. Mission control. Y'all have lockers next to your beds? Y'all changing to your stuff. It's on. You're like, good night. And then you already got yours going. I picture it like,

uh, yeah. What I'm picturing is like the, like breaking bad, like those things. Yeah. Oh yeah. What does it look like?

Like Walt and Jesse getting ready to cook. Yeah. Yeah. Let's sleep. Let's sleep. you've never seen one no there's different kites there's the nose shared a hotel with a comic years ago one time and he he wore one and it was like it was really like a you know like a ventilator going all night over there when you breathe you, you can hear it. It's better than the alternative though. Yeah. Than him snoring all night. Yeah. You know.

So you don't know what, like, can you describe what it looks like? Well, there's some that just have nose pillows. Mine's the kind that goes over,

it doesn't actually. Nose and mouth. Mine actually doesn't go over my nose, just my mouth. Oh, okay. Yeah, mine's just over the nose.

Just depends on how you sleep. Just a preference thing. You know, some people go over in the nose. Just depends on how you sleep. Just a preference thing. Some people go over the whole face just to make sure everything's good. I mean, that person wakes up like they're underwater. You just see their eyes are real big because they're looking through glass. You're like, hey. What happens when you forget it, though? Say you go on the road and you're like, ah, I forgot my CPAP.

What is that like for you? It's rough. I don't even take mine with me. Yeah, that's crazy. That's crazy. But I think I'm just on the border. At least that's what they said. But I remember we were in Salt Lake City, and we were going to go eat in the middle of the border. At least that's what they said. But remember when we were in Salt Lake City and we were going to go eat like

the middle of the day and you said, man, I fell asleep by accident and didn't have my CPAP on and I feel terrible. But that wouldn't. You don't feel like that if you don't use it? Do a little nap? Yeah. Oh, that's crazy. Yeah.

I can't sleep without it. Because it's like I'm getting negative sleep. You wake up feeling worse than you did before and i was doing that for years before i got this i know how small is it it's i mean this big yeah i use it on the bus yeah yeah yeah mike james brings his too i think right oh does he he wears one i don't yeah he does all right it's good we'll get some good sleep on your bus, man. There's a lot of assisted sleep on that bus, but it's good sleep.

Comedy's changed. I used to think it was a real party on there. Now it's all just CPAP machines. That's what I think when people come into my green room. I think people think that it's about to be a party back there, and I'm just sitting there yeah i mean i'm waiting i'm waiting for someone to come in there and you start talking to me yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah you guys getting after it back there like yeah i might have a sugar-free red bull yeah we'll see you guys we're gonna see what happens

that's using the horn with Home Depot. That's right. Oh, I went to the dealership to get some work done on my, or get my oil changed. And they were like, you're actually not due for an oil change. You need to get your tires rotated. And I was like, all right. But they were like, you are due for some services. You need to get your spark plugs changed.

Of course, yeah. And I go, all right, well, what's that cost? They go $700. I was like, for spark plugs? I was like, what do that cost they go seven hundred dollars to get i was like for spark plugs i was like what do they cost six bucks she was like well actually eighteen dollars but it takes a lot to get to the spark how many spark plugs are there it takes a couple hours to get in there and i go come on seven hundred bucks and then i go well nah we're not gonna do that and then i was like and and you also do to get your transmission service.

And I was like, well, what did they do there? And she goes, well, she said, that's $400. She said, they empty out the fluid and then put some new fluid in there. And I go for $400. She's like, well, it's a real special machine. And I'm like, well, I bet it is. Why is it like two hours to get to a spark plug? They're get to it through the where is the spark plug i know that's what i'm saying it's like you're talking eleven hundred dollars for just some regular you don't even know if anything's

messed up you're just saying service i need a real mechanic that's crazy yeah 11 yeah that's so expensive yeah just to be like oh yeah, but you do have that's like going, if you went to the doctor and they're like, you have to have surgery. Yeah. And this is your car. Laura looks at that stuff, but Laura changes a lot. She'll watch a YouTube video on it. Oh yeah. Where was this at?

The dealership. You don't want to name drop the dealership? It was the Toyota dealership and I've been going there and it's like, I like going there because actually they don't really recommend a lot of these things. You should collaborate with Nissan. Yeah, I should. In a video. Yeah, ask them to collaborate on Instagram.

I should. I should. Get something going. You ever want to talk to people and you go, you know what you're doing is you're taking advantage of people, right? You know that deep down. But it's happening to them too and what do you mean well they go get their car fixed but it goes they're they're they're getting to advantage in another situation like where it's all it's it's to the top it's everybody

you're really you're just you're technically just as bad as that person because you're both not changing because it's the top that's doing it so you two citizens that are not the top you are not agreeing even though you think they shouldn't be doing it but there's things that you would have done that you would have waited on tables and stuff that you could have or whatever in life you could have done taking advantage of someone else so those two people should agree to go like yeah none of us agree to this anymore right you go to what you go to a i expected it to cost money right i don't expect things to be free but i expected they were gonna say i'll be 200 bucks for the spark plugs and you know 100 bucks 200 i don't know 200 for the

transmission yeah they're like 11 i was like what i came in here for a 30 oil change and you're gonna try to hit me with 1100 for you're not saying it's messed up you're just saying well you're at that mileage level yeah it's like a mixed like when but everybody's agreeing the top is the one that's, you know, Toyota at the highest is setting these prices, I guess. But someone at the top is setting those prices. And that person's just doing it. But they're choosing to participate in this. But what do you want them to do?

Get fired? No. Go find a different job? Go to a job where the whole point of it is not to exploit people. I know, but then you're situationally. So that person's got a job. And their life is not evolved around Toyota. So their life is like,

I'm trying to just give food for my family and provide all this stuff. Right. So it's not. So I'm saying you're just as much of a problem. Cause I'm sure you've had a job. We've all had jobs in our life where we are pushing something that should not be pushed. He sold pesticides.

Yeah. I'm pushing my comedy right now. Yeah. No, I know, but I'm saying like with pesticides, you could be like, yeah, you don't, like it's bad, but you just. I was the guy that would be like, this is actually the best deal. And then when I waited tables and my seafood restaurant started serving steak, I'd be like, don't get that steak.

I'm like, you know, because it's expensive and it wasn't good. Yeah, yeah. Well, I mean, you can do that, but I mean, like, I think be like, don't get that tonight. I'm like, you know, because it's expensive and it wasn't good. Yeah, yeah. Well, I mean, you can do that. But I mean, like, I think they're, you know, I don't blame the that person is you. That's you sitting behind. What about this? So I was in Chattanooga at the comedy catch and you have to get a parking pass. You have to pick it up at the front office.

I don't have a parking pass to park my car to go get the parking pass. So I parked my car in a spot. I write a little note on a piece of paper. We'll be back in under two minutes running to get my parking pass. Come back. I have a parking thing. I could not have been more mad, dude. I'm standing up.

I'm looking around the parking lot. Where are you? See, that's the thing is that it's it doesn't help for you to yell at that guy but but that guy is choosing to do that but that guy will get fired if he does not if he just goes i'm going to be a reasonable person a job where you're not i'm lucky enough that doesn't ruin my whole week yeah there are people who's literally their their months are ruined because that guy's job is to do you're doing nothing i know all right but that guy is also has a job because there's people that would just leave their car parked

on a street for two months and never do it. So if you don't fix it. So I know that there's, there's some give and take, but you don't know what the give and take is. And I'm sure he's seen 5,000 different scenarios where it's like, I watched a guy ride a video thing and said, I was coming right back. That's like the people they get their cars towed i don't understand it i've never understood that when they go you go you did not pay the money but could you have that job but then they chase down yeah the tow truck could you do that for a living look at people in the

eyes and go i'm sorry your life's about to be changed but but could you look at that person and go just pay your bill? Dude, I don't want no one to do this. It can't be chaos out there. But like if you're choosing jobs to go into every day, you want to just write parking tickets for people. Not everybody's fortunate to get to choose their job. Like it's out of a, like you just graduate college and go, I'll take whatever. I'll take this job and this job.

You just go, I got to have the job that I have. When I worked at the water company, it's not like I'm going there because I'm a diehard water company. It's like they had benefits, so I had to go read people's water. And I had to lock. If people didn't pay their water, and we would. We would try to help them because you'd have to go in and lock their water so they can't use their water. And you kind of go to them and you go hey you know you got to pay this dude like you're not you know it's like it's they're gonna they're gonna be like why are you not shutting that water off it's a business well eventually you have to shut it no i did not

think like hey i don't look forward to going to do that to you but it's also the same yeah it's the same situation like what dude don't I'm not just making this up. You're not paying the water. Look, we would even give them extra time. And we would, as the worker, push it as much as you can. Now you're right. And I chose that job because what else am I going to choose? I don't have a college degree.

So I've got to go get benefits. I've got to go work because I didn't get to go to college. A job is a job. But I'm saying if you wake up and you've been doing this five years and you're like, what do I do all day? All I do is go around and ruin people's weeks, months. No, but you don't think of it like that because it's, I know. Maybe you should take a step back and think about the impact that your job actually has on people. But also, I know, but that life's not fair and it's not fair too to put all these people in situations.

All those people, trust me, I don't want to, I don't never wanted to cut someone's water off. My life would be so much better if everybody would follow the rules and just to the water. So it's the same situation. Right.

So you're going like, what do you, do you think this is fun? No, I don't want to do the fun thing, but someone has to be an adult and go, we can't have just lunacy going on. Cause there's way more in,

you know, and there are people catching strays and, you know, like you are getting a ticket, even though you're a good guy and all that kind of stuff. But there's, that was parked illegally, but I was parked.

I was like, come on, just let me do it for like 30 seconds. You know what I'm saying? I agree with you. Yes. I just, I, I don't think they wake up and they're happy to do that.

I'd rather live in the world we live in now than a world where it's just chaos and you can park wherever you want and there's no repercussions, right? Yeah. I just have to think, I hope that that person lays their head down that night and go like, what did I do today? I know, but that's a brutal thought to throw at someone. I know. That's what I think. I think that person has that job because they get health insurance. The job I had was a job with benefits, health insurance. It had all that stuff. That's why I worked at the water company.

So going to bed, I don't want to do any of this. There's no emotion really involved in it. If it was the only decision I made, then I would have emotion involved in saying, I don't like this guy, but you're doing it. It's all all day long. Would you agree if somebody liked doing that, then they got a problem? Somebody's like, yes, sir. Yeah. I mean, I guess, but all in all is like, as a person just go, whenever I feel like I'm upset, it can't really probably be the person in front of me that's the problem you know it's and it's hard because it's like they're the ones on the phone they're like when you go to airports and you're like it's i try to like kind of calm down and go

even though you're like you're the only person i can talk to yeah but it's like you know it's this your whole system is putting all of that's what i'm saying it's kind of equally on all of us so the person that's riding the ticket you're just as much of a problem because you're both doing something that you're like we've all mutually agreed not to do because this world the government or whatever as you know that town has said you can't do this kind of stuff and it's because people are breaking rules and then they wouldn't where you know there is no like just a guy being a good guy anymore it's like there's all this like kind of bad stuff going on we're all getting screwed by this i'd like you're all getting screwed by the system right so it's what's the difference between you

and him you've had to do something well i'm a good dude yeah i know what you mean you should have wrote the time on there if I saw that guy I did write the time maybe you wait for the guy I'm not mad at that guy now but like if I saw that guy now I'd probably laugh about it with him but in the moment I was like come on

it's in the in the moment everybody's going to be frustrated that guy will be frustrated if he got a ticket. Everybody could be – you'll be frustrated in the moment. But I don't ever think of it as – the person's not intentionally like, I can't wait. People yell at people.

It's like refs. We were talking about the NBA. It's like it's not – you want to go – I mean, give these people a break, dude. I know they make bad calls and stuff like that, but you just go like, if you don't have that now we don't have the sport and the sport's gone and when they don't make calls it gets pretty chaos you watch everybody cheat immediately right even when there's rules in the nfl and they're cheating on with each other like they're cheating listening to stuff astros

banging trash they have all these rules because you think everybody's like, yeah, just don't bang trash cans. But then the Astros are like, every other team's probably doing something too. And so y'all just caught ours. You know, brought it back to Astros. Yeah. And Dusty just got his power cut off.

Well, not just, but. Yeah, it's been a while. No, it's been a while. But you deserved it. But I, you know, I'm just looking for a good, honest mechanic out here. That's what I want. And, you you know started to do a healthy debate yeah

guys got fired up interesting i mean i i don't even disagree with you it's just like it's just it's hard i i think that's something as you get older too you just get like you know it's just like you know i mean it's like when people talk about voting not to get like where they but you know what voting in your local town like that matters that really matters because that stuff is who you're putting in charge of that kind of stuff yeah so the setting the tone of the town is being set by kind of what's being who you're voting for and who you're putting in. And it's all those things that none of us care about or really know about. Cause you're like, I don't know how to vote for this.

You know, like someone that was running for Harper's school or something, you know, and you're like, no one's ever even thought about even this person, who this person could be. And then stuff gets crazy or something changes. You start having teachers checking for illegal poultry. Yeah changes. Start having teachers checking for illegal poultry.

Yeah. You start having teachers check for illegal poultry and you're like, what is that? And you're like, yeah, because you didn't care. Another celebrity telling us how to vote. I vote for letting teachers let you bring in poultry. I mean, yeah, the teacher.

Poultry is illegal. That's what I want to know. You probably can get ostrich. I. You probably can't get ostrich. I'm guessing I can't get ostrich here in Tennessee. Oh, I assumed all poultry was chicken. Yeah, me too. I thought poultry was just bird meat. Well, I've had ostrich.

Like quail? You don't like quail as poultry? I guess that's true. Squab? I think quail would look down on being called poultry. I think quail would be. What about squab? I don't really know what that is. I agree with you. Quail is like, I'm called poultry. I think quail would be... What about squab? I don't know what that is.

I agree with you. Quail is like, I'm a much better than a chicken. Quail's a... There's degrees of poultry. Turkey? Turkey's poultry, too. Yeah, but quail's like a highbrow. You don't think squab's up there, too?

I don't even know what that is. I don't know what squab is. I think it's baby pigeon. Oh. That sounds like something. Yeah, that's... We get into a fight. We had a squab.

I think a quail... I think a quail is a- Pheasant? Something like that, yeah. A quail is, you know- Yeah, you're right. Pheasant's like a high- It's a highbrow.

Yeah. I picture a quail's got a pipe, and it's like, I'm not poultry. You're like, you're going to eat me? Yeah. Don't group me in with a poultry. I'm not the poultry. You know, the tipping thing that I don't like that they make, it's not that kid's fault that they're doing it. You know what?

I agree with you completely about that. When they flip that thing around, the joke is, look how ridiculous this is. The 18-year-old kid at the register is not setting the tipping policy for that. He probably hates the awkward moment of having to ask for it. And it could be as simple as he doesn't even probably know. And that's the thing is because a lot of people just tip because it's like they feel uncomfortable. There's a lot of like that kind of stuff going on. But it's like, yeah, you could go.

And it's hard because you're like, I don't have the time. So it's either you got to have the time to go call that owner. And it could be as simple as like that owner's like, I don't't know i just got this software and i've never looked at it yeah and then you know and he's like yeah i would take it off but it's you know there's a lot of we got a lot of people that are not professional and so dusty he'll write a write a letter i'm sorry yeah i know i will write a letter yeah i'll call i'll email i'll do whatever i gotta do you think you'd be mayor of the town at some point i I'd like to be. Or sheriff. I'm going to try. Do you rather be

sheriff or mayor? I think I'd rather be mayor. I want to reach out to the mayor of McMinnville and I'd like to try to hang out, try to be friends with the mayor. That's what I'm going to try to look on. To learn how to become a mayor? You think you'd have to cut your hair or you think you're living in town where you're expected to look like that?

I'd like to do that. I'd like to achieve a level of fame enough to where people go, oh, no, we know who this guy is. And then they elect me. But have you ever seen like when they show mayors of town sometimes, like, you know, some of them are like, they look like politicians and some you're like, that's a small town. Yeah. This guy.

That's what I want. And see, McMinnville has a bit of a kayaking vibe to it. So I think I could come in and bring a cool element to it. I don't want to take the current mayor's job, but when he's ready to, or she, I don't know who it is. When they're ready to step out of there, I'd like to come in behind them. But you wouldn't run against them? Well, you know, it depends. Do they want to be my friend or not?

You know what I mean? If they don't, if they reject my friendship, then I have no choice. If you feel slighted. So say he works at this mechanic shop that you're at, go-to. Yeah. That would, you'd run against him pretty comfortably. Well, I'd like to, you know, at least have a talk with him, you know. Yeah.

Just see what's going on. And what would you do as mayor? You would probably first thing just go get the things you're annoyed with fixed? Oh, yeah. Restaurants? I would go first thing just go get the things you're annoyed with fixed? Oh, yeah. Restaurants? I would go to restaurants. Very specific. Restaurants I would go to right away and be like, hey, you got a thing going here, but you got to step it up a little bit.

Like the barbecue restaurant that doesn't seem to know what barbecue chicken is. It's like you got to at least come up with a reason why you don't have it. Don't pretend like you don't know what it is. And crime is through the roof, obviously. But, you know. The barbecue chicken. The restaurants are on board. The restaurants and the rest fixes itself.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Everybody knows that. Get a good restaurant scene going. Yeah. Because they're not open on Mondays. Right Because they're not open on Mondays. Right. They're not open on Mondays. Last Monday, I went to an Applebee's.

Oh, you know, I went to an Applebee's. And then on my own personal podcast, I complained about the Applebee's. Then I went on TikTok later that night to a video I had posted. And the guy goes, I think I was your waiter the other night at the Applebee's. So I really kind of trashed him on the podcast. But not him personally. Yeah. but I was, you know. The system that he's in. The system that he's in.

And then a little bit personally. Yeah, yeah. Some ugly. I just mainly, he didn't refill my water. He asked me, did I want another water? And then I said, yeah. And then he never brought it. So I was like, come on, guy.

People make stuff uncomfortable. uncomfortable like you're right i i i talk about professionalism and no one's professional does not mean that people are not don't know how to do the job that they're doing sure so yes there is situation profession you hope everybody's operating at the professional way but there's also jobs that are just that's a tough job for a parking ticket person because it's like their job is only to do this, but their job is also to keep the street in order.

So then when you don't pull down there and go, what is going on with this street? Yeah. And then you don't even want to come down to that place because it's just chaos.

Right. And they won't refill your water and then the city's just crumbling at that point. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Applebee's is taking a turn.

And it used to be a hot spot. It's taking a turn now. But no other restaurant in McMinnville is open on Monday. Why are they all closed on Monday? I don't know. I don't know what's going on. Is that so you stopped that at the first thing at the mayor?

Yeah, so I'd like to just get a... I want to be his friend and then just get a general vibe of what's going on. But if you go... Because I like McMinnville. People think I'm trashing it. I like it. But you would...

The debate, you and him debate. And first thing you go, what's up with Monday here? Yeah. You make him answer for the Monday. Right. Right. You find out, he goes, I fast on Mondays. You go, the whole town doesn't have to fast. Right. Right. You know, you feel free to do what you need to do, but the whole town doesn't have to do it. Because Sunday I can see it. Yeah. Monday I don't. Yeah. Monday it's like, anytime, like when I was in my own hometown over Christmas, it was like, I don't know, this year Christmas was like on Monday or something. Tuesday, no place was open to get a coffee in the morning.

And then I was like, all right, all right. It's the day after Christmas, but it is a Tuesday. Wednesday, still not open. I'm like, we got to get back to work sometime, guys. I want a coffee out here. In McMinnville? In Opelika, my hometown. I was like, it's a work week.

Well, you're in a small town. Second holiest day of the year. My buddy was like, we're not all a big city like Nashville. I'm like, I'm not making fun of the town. I'm like, just give me a coffee spot that's open. That's all I want is a coffee. I think people are just easy living and they don't need as much. Yeah, it's nice.

It's Mr. Busybody over here. People have Keurigs and stuff. It's a Wednesday. It's not a Sunday. You're not looking for a transmission on Wednesday. You're asking for coffee that's everywhere. Just a cup of coffee, yeah. Just one of the multiple

coffee shops. I'm trying to buy a pig tree. Something, you know. Trying to gob. What was the word? Quibs. Squab. Yeah, I'm not out here looking for quail and squab. Which you might be able to get. Yeah, I'm not out here looking for quail and squab. Yeah. Which you might be able to get. Yeah.

That might be true. Squab is a baby pigeon. All right. It looks good. All right. This is gone. Yeah. I don't know.

This episode was about sleep. We need to go to sleep. Yeah. All right. We're back out. New Orleans. This is the week you're with me Yeah

Yeah My show last night In Huntsville went so well They said We need to put you in an arena So You're going to the arena I'm doing an arena

So you're doing Huntsville And then like Literally doing the arena Right after A week later A week later That's too bad That timing's bad though

For you Why? Well, because you would be able To push it from the stage That's true That's true. That's true. But I, we kind of alluded to it

last week's episode, but I was hoping people wouldn't even know I was out with them because I'm like, they're like, oh, I'll just see him.

Maybe you won't be. Yeah. Eight minutes is all we want from Bates anyway, but no, I hope they come to my show. Yeah. And stand up live.

First weekend of June. I'm in Phoenix, Arizona at Desert Ridge Improv. Then the next week I'm in Sunnyvale, California at Rooster Teeth Feathers Comedy Club. Come on out and see me. I want to be in Cape Girardeau on Thursday, which I don't know if that's a corporate gig or not, but I will be there. And then I'm in St. Louis and then Royal Oak, Michigan. Then the next week, I'm in Fargo, North Dakota and Bismarck, North Dakota.

Amazing. Check those out. All right. Well, I hope you had a great weekend. I'll be a good week. Have a great week this week and we will see you next week. All right. All right. Bye. Love. nateland is produced by nateland productions and by me nate bargetzi and my wife laura on the audio boom platform recording and editing for the show is done by genovations media thanks for tuning in be sure to catch us next week on the nateland podcast