The Nateland Podcast - #38 Alabama ft. Dusty Slay

Episode Date: March 17, 2021

On this week's episode, the guys are joined by fellow comedian Dusty Slay to discuss his home state of Alabama. They discuss important moments in the state's history like when an Alabama woman got hi...t by a meteorite, Dusty being stabbed by a pencil, and the last time the Harlem Globetrotters lost a game (even though that had nothing to do with Alabama).   Co-hosts: Brian Bates ( https://www.instagram.com/brianbatescomic) & Aaron Weber ( https://www.instagram.com/realaaronweber)   Podcast produced by Nate & Laura Bargatze Recording & Editing by Genovations Media https://www.natebargatze.com https://www.allthingscomedy.com https://www.genovationsmedia.com Email - Nateland@NateBargatze.com

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Hello folks, welcome to Nateland, glad to have you, as always, this is a big week. So this will tomorrow, when this comes out Wednesday, tomorrow, my new special, The Greatest Average American on Netflix comes out on March 18th. So this week, exciting week. Pretty nervous about it, but we'll see. Are you going to watch it somewhere with people? I think I am here. No, I think no one can do it. It's spring break, and so everybody's kind of gone as far as having a big watch party. That's what they told you when they were watching the Justice League?
Starting point is 00:00:59 Yeah. Oh, yeah, we're going to be out of town. I heard about all of the Justice League. Brian Bauchner texted me and told me about why they had to move it. It's all kind of sad. Yeah. There's a comment on here, too, about it. Okay.
Starting point is 00:01:13 And then, but yeah, so it comes out this week. Yeah. As always, you're always nervous about them because you're like, I don't know, dude. Maybe it's terrible. You know? No. I mean, every night it's always rough cut. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:01:26 Yeah. I thought it was great. Yeah. Awesome, man. Yeah, it's just never, you're just like ready for, you know, by the time you tape it, you know, we taped it in October to now, it's just, you always feel like this. You always feel, I don't know.
Starting point is 00:01:41 The Tennessee Kid I felt very, very good about. But I was in theaters. I was, felt very very good about but i was in theaters i was you know leading up to it was uh i knew it was gonna be good stand-ups did not feel good about oh so the stand-up season one well that ended up doing great it ended up doing great yeah but i just what i truly like so full-time magic was i think i remember feeling good like feeling good about that one that was the first one. I was just very excited about the first one. The stand-ups, the half-hour season one, I was like, oh, that was awful.
Starting point is 00:02:14 It was like, you know, just, I was like, this is going to be brutal. I don't know what's going to happen. All that stuff. And then, yeah, we did great. Tennessee Kid, it felt good about. You know, it was like the lead up to it was it's almost like when they when you like stand-ups was a half hour so then you kind of feel nervous about that and uh and you know and then the tennessee kid i felt i was like all right this one will be good i just it was destroying on the road and then the greatest
Starting point is 00:02:42 average american uh which is my favorite title of all the specials. But it's the one that you're back to nervous. I'm like back to nervous again. You're like, I don't know, dude, maybe it's terrible. Just because the setup, I mean, it was just such a weird thing. It's the weirdest run up to it, right? The weirdest run up to it. Drive-throughs and COVID and everything else.
Starting point is 00:03:00 Yeah, never really got to, you know, I mean, I was on the road with it. I know the material does good, but it's like,'s like would have you know could i got it better could i done this you know all the things leading up to it but i don't want to make excuses for it but i i don't i hope i don't have to you know i wouldn't you know i hope i'm not like guys always remember when you're watching it every every joke think well know, it is a tough situation. I chose to – I wanted to put this picture out. I don't know. It just makes me – I'm just nervous.
Starting point is 00:03:31 But we'll see how it does, you know. I've done some interviews and some people that have watched it that they sent, they all said they like it. I mean, not that I don't – what are they going to tell me? Yeah, they're interviewing me. I didn't think it was that good. Like, yeah. But they can pick up on some stuff that I was like, I love this. And like okay great yeah because we have something kind of happened during it uh that kind of runs through it just for taping outside and i left and we left
Starting point is 00:03:55 it in and i thought i think it could be funny like it shows it's i think it is funny and it shows the realness of what we were doing we're doing outside yeah outside taping right so uh but yeah here we go here we go and i did uh yeah and then gotta get all new stuff which is impossible um you always never can you never as a comic you never you're like how could i ever come up with anything else ever again it's good to know you feel that way because i feel that way all the time i feel it every single spread the tennis i mean then i think back like at the for the tennessee kids special after that i was like how would i or even up to the tennessee kid after stand-ups it's like how am i going to come up more stuff and then the tennessee kid then you're like okay and you always feel like you're barely
Starting point is 00:04:42 getting it in like you barely get it down in time and uh and then after that one you're like i don't know dude how can i ever talk for another hour and then you do this special and then yeah we're right back at it where you know it was this weekend or last week i was doing like 30, I was doing like 25, 30 minutes new. Not all great. Some fun. Trying to be more fun. Not that I'm not fun, but I love like fun, silly jokes.
Starting point is 00:05:13 I got one silly joke. I haven't done much from the podcast. We talked about that. I need to do it. I feel a little weird. You just worry that the audience has seen it. But I need to try some of the stuff that we've kind of come up with the podcast just to see. And it's coming out almost two years to the day of Tennessee Kid, isn't it?
Starting point is 00:05:35 March 26th was Tennessee Kid. Of 2019. Yep. Wow. And so March 18th. And that's the, if I can be lucky enough, I mean, who knows? Netflix could say no and never want to do another one ever again. Options always on the table. But in my head, what I want to do is every two years.
Starting point is 00:05:54 And my sixth one with Netflix will be when I'm 50. And then, you know, yeah. Not including stand-ups and full-time magic, so I've been like eight. And then 10, and then B. No, I don't know. I have no goals past that. But that's kind of the goal now. So we'll see.
Starting point is 00:06:12 All right. Well, let's get into it. Oh, and your album is at number one. Is it still? Brian's been keeping an eye on it. Yeah, I'm very impressed with how well it's going. We talked about it at the end of last week's. Yeah. an eye on it yeah i'm very impressed with how well it's going we talked about the end of last week's yeah and uh is yesterday i looked at it was it gone back up to number two wow which is
Starting point is 00:06:32 even more impressive yeah yeah yeah that's cool a lot of nice comments from people that listen to the podcast and stuff so it's been fun no more an album on itunes you say that in your bio now yeah can you yeah every yeah yeah i mean, you should. You legitimately are number one in iTunes. I had when I was number two. Like, here's something. I wrote that. Like, it might still be in my bio.
Starting point is 00:06:53 But it was, it did, it was like good. Like, you always put something like that in. That's a good little thing to have on there. You know, it's like this guy had the number one album on iTunes. You know, it guy had the number one album on iTunes.
Starting point is 00:07:06 It's a good credit. So yeah, put in the bio. Get you a couple more. Thanks to everybody who's checked it out. Yeah, thank you. Thank you, guys. You seem sincere about it. Golly, dude.
Starting point is 00:07:20 I hope you drop now. Now you're going to drop hard. Yeah, thanks, everybody. It seems, yeah, it seems. Thanks for getting me up to number two, guys. Thanks a lot. dude i don't know i hope you drop now now you're gonna drop hard you know yeah thanks everybody it seems yeah thanks for getting me up to number two guys yeah thanks a lot yeah way to come through guys number two he's getting mad at him uh i think i brought my best and i think you could guys could have brought your best i did my part y'all yeah uh so here we go starting the comments cindy craig oh man cindy kreitzer frazier kreitzer frazier is that her real name cindy kreitzer probably her maiden name and her married name frazier she just wanted to stick with like the z she wanted a z you think she ever when
Starting point is 00:08:01 she married her husband she goes uh would just if you didn't have a Z in your name, out. You better have a Zer. You better have a Zer. If you don't have a Zer, then hit the road, Jack. Wouldn't even go out. She met a lovely man. Her name's John Smith. Oh, how you doing, John?
Starting point is 00:08:19 Well, beat it, you loser. I'm a Zer girl. Nate, you need to go out of town more often and come home tired. Today's podcast on the Old West was one of the best. You guys were hotter than a bowling pot of Donner Parts. Bowling pot of Donner
Starting point is 00:08:36 Parts. Yeah. I was very tired last week and I felt it. So I'm glad that Cindy liked it. She loved it. Well, she gets it. She's always got it. So I'm glad that Cindy liked it. She loved it. She loved it. Well, she gets it. She's always got it. Sisa 4747. Sounds like, I mean, the future when we're just numbers.
Starting point is 00:08:54 Like that's what we're going to be. Like they just yell that and then they shoot you in the head. This is the worst episode you have ever done. Basically what Sisa just did to me. Nate is completely not interested you have ever done. Basically what CESA just did to me. Nate is completely not interested in the Wild West. The fact that he has never even seen a John Wayne movie and doesn't appear to even know who he is is shocking. I know who he is.
Starting point is 00:09:16 I don't know how I appeared. I didn't mean to give that appearance. It goes, I wasn't, you know, it like john wayne was behind me yeah you were the one arguing he's maybe our biggest first celebrity yeah now there's a lot of people upset you guys hadn't seen tombstone or any western whatsoever yeah i don't know if westerns are my thing i mean i'm not the most biggest superhero uh movie guy i go watch the big ones but it's not like i'm obsessed with it uh i've seen django unchained does that count is that an airplane that was an airplane if y'all y'all might have heard that yeah that was uh man they come over sometimes so low don't play brian for that one yeah that was an airplane yeah uh i was very tired last week, so I did feel that. So I apologize for that.
Starting point is 00:10:05 I was like, well, it's a long, which is no one's fault but mine, but it's a long couple weeks. And, yeah, I do know John Wayne. I have not watched any Westerns. I enjoy talking about the Wild Wild West. But, yeah, maybe it is i mean maybe it is the worst episode you've seen the wild wild west that was the one you'd seen yeah yeah yeah i mean was he not you know a classic western yeah john wayne gacy is but who the uh uh john
Starting point is 00:10:40 wayne was wasn't a good guy what do you think is that? And I think it's John Wayne Gacy. Well, I would hope so. All right. I hope I don't appear that I like him. And they're like, no, no. Come here. They have to pull me over. Nate, come here for a second. I'm like, what's up?
Starting point is 00:10:55 Matthew Gerber. Bacon Bits is taking Whistle While You Work to a whole new level. Yeah, a lot of, you know. I mean, I brought it up up i think at the beginning i was trying to correct it maybe we could uh bring it up privately next time uh but uh there's always an option to no there was this isn't live so we could just uh edit it out but uh i think uh i think brian uh has and wants to make a statement i think think we got – so I'll introduce you to the statement. So as you listened last week, you know that we had some issues,
Starting point is 00:11:31 and no one's more embarrassed than the man I'm going to bring up now. And he just would like to make a statement, and I think afterwards I think he'd also appreciate you guys' privacy. Please, Brian, breakfast baits. What camera am I on, guys? I'm joking. So, yeah, I chose a lighthearted one there just to get us in the topic. There were many that weren't so lighthearted.
Starting point is 00:12:01 We're recording this on Sunday. We've already had like probably about 400 comments and emails and about 390 of them were about my nose recently. I woke up Wednesday morning and my, I mean,
Starting point is 00:12:11 I was like, still in bed checking my inbox and people were furious. Furious. They're like, you've ruined my week.
Starting point is 00:12:18 I spent $600 on Mechanic just to see if they could figure out what the problem was. Took my laptop to the apple store yeah i thought it was overheating you don't understand you would ever do something like this a lot of people told me i ruined their week so i apologized everyone i'm sorry there were some people i will never question a lot of times i've seen celebrities say i got death threats for
Starting point is 00:12:40 something and i'm like i don't know if you really did i believe it now you believe you didn't get death threats but you got got some pretty close yeah yeah i got some angry yeah you would have got the you know the in your interview you'd be like on 60 minutes but you get death threats you're like their next step was a death threat it wasn't i didn't get death threats right but the next step that was the trajectory that was yeah yeah were leading. They actually might give a death threat to someone now because they've opened the door to go, well, I went after breakfast so hard with no death threat. I think I want to do a death threat. And then they come out next.
Starting point is 00:13:15 Yeah, I got some DMs that let me know a few things about my mom. Death messages. Death messages, DMs. Yeah, death messages. All right, so I've taken a Claritin D today you sound great man we thought it was the wiring but maybe it was just Claritin this episode is brought to you by
Starting point is 00:13:34 Claritin Tennessee allergies don't help but again everyone I'm sorry now that's good don't worry about it. We're back. I was tired.
Starting point is 00:13:48 You know, we're trying to give everybody a break from the podcast. Yeah. That's funny. I mean, look, that's tough. You know, what are you going to do? We tried to, yeah. What do we got? We could edit it out.
Starting point is 00:14:02 The whole show? Your face is blurry. And then we can't get the noise out, so we just blur your face, and we just say, well, Brian wasn't in this week. Someone else was there. And that's how we have to hide it. And they go, who's this blurry guy? Someone called me because Doc Holliday's girlfriend was Big Nose Kate.
Starting point is 00:14:18 Yeah. Someone called me Big Nose Bates. Yeah. That's pretty good. That's pretty good. Yeah. I like that one. All right. Well, welcome back. Yeah. This is a whole. That's pretty good. Yeah. I like that one. All right.
Starting point is 00:14:25 Welcome back. Yeah. This is a whole new you. We love you, Brian. Seth Buchanan. So my wife is nine months pregnant and I'm about to go on paternity leave. I thought paternity is a weird word. I always thought paternity.
Starting point is 00:14:38 Is it not, Phyllis? Sure. Because then it's maternity is when you have the baby. Right. I never thought about that. That's the mom and paternity is the dad. Oh. I'm about to go on paternity leave so the dad says that?
Starting point is 00:14:52 My wife is nine months pregnant and I'm about to go on paternity leave? So a dad would say that and he gets paternity leave? Like a mom gets maternity leave? Really? Yeah. How long does he get a good leave?
Starting point is 00:15:06 I remember when that law came into effect a few years ago. I don't remember. It doesn't really affect me, unfortunately. Yeah. You got your own issues. I need to go maternity leave for my nose. Naturnity. Brian's on the maternity leave.
Starting point is 00:15:22 What's that? It's a whistling nose. He'll be gone for about two weeks. So you thought paternity was when the woman was just pregnant? I don't think I've ever thought about it at all. I just don't think I've ever even questioned it. I didn't know that the husband gets to go on paternity. I didn't know he also gets to leave. You missed out when Harper was born.
Starting point is 00:15:40 I mean, I was always on paternity leave. My whole career has been on paternity leave. All right. I thought, why not get a new game to play during the off time? So I saw Red Dead Redemption 2 on PS4. It was 30% off and bought it. Now that it's spoiled for me, I guess it's back to NCAA 14. Thanks a lot, college boy.
Starting point is 00:16:02 Did you skip your friendship class that day? Love the show. We'll mute Aaron's parts from now on. Hey, that's fair. I apologize for spoiling it. However, depending on how you play the game, you'll get a different ending depending on your honor level. Oh, wow.
Starting point is 00:16:16 So you might not get the ending that I spoiled. Yeah, the main one, the main ending. Maybe we'll get lucky and get one of the other random no one gets endings. It's still the best game ever. Can you be a good guy? You can. It's a little harder, but you can. So you didn't have to kill those people.
Starting point is 00:16:34 I was full on evil. Yeah. Katie Denny. Nate, you often say you were too dumb for college, but I actually think you're plenty smart. I think most people are smart enough to make it through college if they apply themselves. It does, however, require you to attend class,
Starting point is 00:16:51 even if you don't want to learn how to keep score in bowling. Yeah, attending class is gigantic. Yeah. That is one of the main things. That's probably your biggest obstacle, it sounds like. That was the one of the harder things. I was at the semester of Western Kentucky it's uh straight up a hill and so you're we our dorms are at the bottom and then you have to go to the walk to the top i mean that just
Starting point is 00:17:15 no one was going like you were like i'm not going to that they're very easy to not go to class mike mccannally i sit on advisory board for the marketing department at the university I graduated from. Though we are a state school with state funding, you'd be amazed at how much of our focus is just on how to bring in more money. We spend so little time focusing on the education and opportunities that we can provide students that I have become very disheartened in the idea of higher education. I even suggested that we stop requiring students to take classes such as oil painting, I can't even say that word, oil painting and racquetball to earn a marketing degree. But the reasons I was given for why these
Starting point is 00:17:59 exist was purely because we can require them, which increases total tuition paid per student. purely because we can require them, which increases total tuition paid per student. And when you look at how much the cost of tuition has increased over the years, while the actual education a student gets has remained the same, something is definitely wrong, and it's a bummer. Wow. I love that. Look who's back.
Starting point is 00:18:21 I mean, people got upset. I never really, people never get upset at the stuff i say which did it was funny did i talk about the context of that video that we put out last week i didn't talk about that right oh you're talking about how some people were upset people were upset but it was very funny to the video i posted uh with aaron about that was like it was the whole context of it looked like i was attacking students and that, and that did look like that. And I'm not attacking students. But it's funny to be like, why can't you? I'm like, well, it took me out of context. The video did. I posted the video.
Starting point is 00:18:55 Like, which is very funny to me. You took it out of context. I'd like you'd be like, dude, the media is taking me out of context. You're the media, your own people took you out of content you're like yeah dude they're not they're not doing me any favors i'm not doing myself any favors and i can't trust myself i'd like to make a statement against my own self that you need to watch the whole video it was extremely funny to do that it made it look like I am not attacking students at all. I am confused on what an endowment is. These schools have these giant endowments.
Starting point is 00:19:31 Harvard is $40 billion. You could make 40 other Harvards for people to go to just around the country. You could be like, we think you need to know our our education so we're going to use this endowment it should your endowment should always be close to zero like usually we are using it to make right is that what endowment is uh i don't know i don't like a savings i don't know how much endowment is liquid i think a lot of it is oh you know and then they yeah a gas yeah that's i'll talk like i was gonna keep going but that's pretty much all does it you know what an endowment is i learned from the wall street episode that i'm not confident in any of my financial knowledge yeah i really don't know so endowment so they don't have the money it's like saying there's some kind of yeah right yeah yeah i think so okay which makes sense
Starting point is 00:20:25 and you want it to be yeah i just it's they keep raising prices schools are getting stupid expensive you know and then they always are just raising money this college is always you know we need a football stadium let's go raise some money like how much can you ask of your alumni yeah they went there and you're like so i gotta that's the one's the one thing I guess I do enjoy of not going to college. No one calls me and asks me. I don't have to – do you have Notre Dame ask? They do, and I'm like, I haven't finished paying y'all for the actual – Well, they always ask, and if you become just mega rich,
Starting point is 00:21:00 I mean, you're just like owed to your college. Well, that's how you get football tickets as an alumni as an alumnus you you donate a certain amount and then you qualify for tickets so that's the only way to go to the game no you can you can get tickets the regular way but you qualify for certain kind of yeah yeah when everybody does that i understand giving to the college but i just don't understand it seems these colleges have a lot of money some of them yeah and so i don't why do you keep that's crazy to keep asking the students they're doing fine without my donation yeah but it's like that's you know it's like it doesn't make sense to the you got to keep asking like you keep going can we have more money and you're like what are you doing dude like give go i don't know like it doesn't make
Starting point is 00:21:46 there's got to be these colleges have a lot of money yeah they're doing really well i think uh but yeah i also don't know at all just seems some of those classes defend them like that friendship class which got us all started once you master the basics then you get to kind of expand your brain a little bit and start doing some stuff right we actually take a fun class it was a philosophy class we got into the nitty-gritty of some aristotle all the way up through modern day yeah ted lasso ted from aristotle to ted lasso should talk about it yeah uh but yeah it's just the name is funny. Yeah. Well, I think everybody would make fun of that name.
Starting point is 00:22:27 Right. It was a running joke among the people in the class. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And so someone that's an outsider hears that, we do think, you know, because that's what someone else said. They're like, you know, well, everybody takes roads,
Starting point is 00:22:39 so no one, you know, but I'm not going to be allowed to go. Notre Dame's not letting me go there. They're just not. I don't have the grades. I'm not smart enough. And because I wasn't good at education. I wasn't good at taking tests. That wasn't my thing. And so I don't get the option to go. Notre Dame's not like, well, we also set aside some dummies that want to go. That's what they should do. Bust in some dummies. Yeah, they should bust in some dummies.
Starting point is 00:23:06 Every school should be like, we have 100 scholarships that are just for losers that barely made it to high school. But we want to change their life and we think that they deserve a chance. Maybe they didn't do good in high school for whatever reason, but they get another chance.
Starting point is 00:23:18 Wow. Right? Instead, I don't get that chance. Just have 100 every school. We do 100 scholarships. You're an idiot. That's the guy we're talking to. You should a uh a fund like that at vanderbilt at vanderbilt at vanderbilt an idiot an endowment set it up remember when george costanza was on that susan ross board yeah
Starting point is 00:23:36 the kid that yeah solid c average solid c average not getting ahead not falling behind yeah i'm not being braggy that's what we're looking for. Just someone that's like, it's not like book smarts are not his thing. Right. Like it's not clicking, but they're smart in other ways. And you just get, man, mix those guys in. Mix those guys and girls. Just have them just, I mean, just who are they?
Starting point is 00:24:04 Well, go in there. Each room has a one student that smokes during the class and that's how you can tell because he just walking around just and you can't tell them no yeah they're allowed to smoke that's what i would allow if they want to smoke cigarettes they can get to smoke cigarettes we're trying to help them out all right we're solving things call the es, as I was getting ready to leave for school, I started downloading the relevant podcast. Imagine my delight to see Nate as today's guest. I exclaimed to my husband, it's a spring break miracle. My two favorite podcasts collided today.
Starting point is 00:24:40 It made me wonder if Nate could share on an upcoming podcast all the shows he's been interviewed on recently in promotion of the new special so all the folks can know where to catch more of his humor and antics that are so welcomed in these strange times i can't wait for thursday's netflix release uh so uh yeah what have i uh i don't know if i'm allowed to say some you're know about one. I'll post them. I think I'm going to do... You just did Ryan Rosillo again.
Starting point is 00:25:08 Did Ryan Rosillo again. Bustin' with the boys. Bustin' with the boys. Did you do Burt Crusher? Just did Burt's. Nice. We talk a lot about golf on Burt's, so don't head over there. I would give you a heads up.
Starting point is 00:25:24 Man, I forget. I'll have to look and i have to i cannot remember but you got some more coming up i got more coming up and so you know about some you're here about that i'm going to do uh that yeah yeah i think i say i'm doing well i'm doing one i'm doing good morning good morning america i believe on marchth, 29th or 30th. That's cool. Nice. And then, yeah, doing Access Daily. It's like Access Hollywood.
Starting point is 00:25:54 Okay. I got that next week. I'm doing Barstool Sports again Wednesday. Aaron Land? Aaron Land. I'd love to come on. I mean, I think I'm on in the background a lot i'd love to be a focal point of aaron land send me a tape yeah i will uh so yeah i don't and i i i
Starting point is 00:26:13 can't think off the top of my head but uh wherever i have a big one uh and i just don't know when it's going to come out so you skipped uh the back of the first page there was some more uh oh all right let me get all right so that was the last. All right, Robert, I am actually a descendant of one of the families that was in the Donner party. No way. The Breen's. That's crazy. only surviving written account from a party member as it was happening. The Breen's and the Reed's were the only families to not lose a family member during the ordeal. And our family has always proclaimed that the Breen's did not resort to cannibalism. Dude,
Starting point is 00:26:55 that's crazy. I know. That's, that's unbelievable. The descendant of one of the families that was in the Donner party, the Breen's. Wow. Wow,
Starting point is 00:27:04 dude. That's so wild. Yeah. Huh? Look at it. And at and look what look at it's all coming together yep in our family that guy look he looks like a guy who went through the donner yeah that guy has no joy left in his life yeah patrick bring yeah just you want to smile patrick i mean would you You know what I saw up there? Those animal Donners going on. And he just gets furious at them like, are you crazy? No, I won't smile. Say cheese.
Starting point is 00:27:34 No, I will not. I'd love some cheese. I am dead inside. You look over there, Don Donners sizing your camera guy up. I like that their family just constant like how many times do they have to go we did not resort to cannibalism just as a statement as a family you have to always just kind of say it like you bring it up just a lot of statements yeah that you gotta look yeah we were there no we were there. No, we were there. Our family did not resort to cannibalism. We held out as we said the Donners should have.
Starting point is 00:28:10 And honestly, I think the Donners always wanted to do cannibalism, to be honest. If you ask me, I think they were rooting for it. They did it after the first five hours. I was hungry for a mid-snack, and they were like, what if we eat people? And you're like, whoa. That was quick. You're like, Johnny Donner. What was his name?
Starting point is 00:28:28 I forgot Donner's first name. Jim. Jim Donner. Johnny works. Jim. Johnny D. Jim Donner. Jim.
Starting point is 00:28:38 Not yet. We're not even. That sounded like I was reading a comment, didn't it? Yeah, that's what I thought. I was trying to keep the joke going you know uh ben tucker i'm distantly related to the donner party on my mom's side my grandma's maiden name is donner i can confidently say that i haven't felt any cannibalistic urges but every year at the thanksgiving someone makes a joke about what
Starting point is 00:29:00 we're due if we run out of turkey gets less and less funny every year i mean how do you not you know that's tough that's where the donners left you is i mean man two people related that's crazy i know uh yeah that's uh distantly related to the donner party wow that's pretty wild i mean that's how do you, yeah. What if you didn't, I mean, everybody hears, but how did they tell you that? I don't know. I'm surprised there were that many that survived to breed. Yeah. Yeah. Well, they got, they were the people that got out, but that's, well, the Donner Barty
Starting point is 00:29:37 breeded, they crushed it up there in that mountain. They were dominant. Oh, that's. I mean, the Donner Barty was like, yeah, there's the most of them. Oh, you don't think they were eating their own family? Why would you do that if there's other families? I mean, just out of respect for the other families. I don't think it's, you know.
Starting point is 00:29:53 Out of respect for the Breams. I think political correctness is all thrown out the window once you start eating people. I think you don't, you know. It's pure survival up there. It's a war. You don't go, that's not, you know what? That's uncouth. Jill Donner doesn't go, Jim, I think we should honestly eat someone in our family because it's looking bad.
Starting point is 00:30:16 And Jim's like, what do you think this is? We're eating people. They're eating people like elbows off the table. Okay. Elbows, yeah. Huh? We're going to eat them. And then you have to go i
Starting point is 00:30:25 mean he might be serious i was gonna say i think the donners did not make it the the main donners their kids i think survived okay but no good for them yeah that's good yeah they had to go yeah uh imagine the jokes if ben tucker's still hearing jokes imagine the jokes those kids are like i mean like uh matt oregon my 10th grade english teacher taught us that on a on a mon on a what is it on a monopone onomatopoeia onomatopoeia onomatopoeia is the second most rhymeical rhythmical rhythm what's that word golly rhythmical rhythmical onomatopoeia is the second most rhythmical that felt like i was like trying to jump over and not fall in the water
Starting point is 00:31:10 during that word rhythmical like i just go like trying to cross the creek and not get my feet wet you gotta kind of the last one's a little bit farther i'm like i'll get there rhythmical word in the english language when we asked her what the first most rhythmical word was, she responded without missing a beat, gonorrhea. Oh, yeah. Rhythmical. I don't think, you know, my family, we've never said the word rhythmical. Just didn't, you know?
Starting point is 00:31:43 Just didn't come up day to day? Never came up. Yeah. Never, you know, I't come up day to day never came up yeah never you know i don't think it was bounced around uh maybe maybe it was maybe my family can all say it you know they all went to my mom or my dad and my brother went to college and my sister uh and my brother-in-law teaches at a college so Adjunct professor. He's an adjunct professor. He is. He's an adjunct professor at college.
Starting point is 00:32:09 So I guess you can tell who did it. Me and my mom. Manna Acosta Robles. Robles. Manny. Manno. Manny. Manny Acosta Robles.
Starting point is 00:32:24 Robles. Acosta Manny. Acosta Manny. How you doing, Manny? Let's go with Manny. Manno. Manny. Manny Acosta. Robles. Robles? Acosta. Manny. Acosta. Manny. How you doing, Manny? Let's go with Manny. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:32:30 Justice League was originally by Zack Snyder, but his daughter committed suicide during the filming, so he stepped down and Joss Whedon took over. Manny felt the version Whedon made was horrible, rushed, many changes to the story, and things taking out. Zack Snyder, who did his own cut of the film, did it for free, I believe, and finished the film this way. That's why it's being re-released. Makes a ton more sense.
Starting point is 00:32:52 Makes sense. Thank you, Manny. Thank you, Manny. I approve it. Manny and Baughner texted me that too. Yeah. Cocktail MD, shave and haircut was used by POWs in Vietnam to make sure a new person on the other side of the wall was American. They tapped the first part and only Americans would know to tap two bits since it wasn't well known to the Vietnamese.
Starting point is 00:33:16 That's a tough one. Vietnamese? Vietnamese. Vietnamese. I mean, that's a word that sounds like it's, you know, I just can't say that word, and I don't like to, because it sounds like I'm saying, like I'm being racist. What are they, Vietmanee? And they're like, and I mean, people are like, oh my God, whoa, and I'm like, I can't, I don't know how to speak, dude. Trust me, I promise you, that did not, I did not mean like
Starting point is 00:33:41 that. Look, get Bartholomew over here. See? You think I'm making fun of that guy? No. I just don't know how to say these words. Rhythmical. I mean, I'd just be shouting that as the family ran off. I promise. I can't say this stuff. I always thought a modern version would be up, up, down, down,
Starting point is 00:34:00 and they'd know left, right, left, right. That's pretty good. That's fine. That would be a modern version. It'd be our version who he's talked about it at dinner parties he's never heard it yeah oh the the famous g code up up down down left right yeah you would not know so we'd go up up down down and you would go yeah what would you think you would say i'd say left right left right now now you would right because of this episode left, right, left, right, now. Now you would. Right. Because of this episode. That's interesting that that's what they did during the wars, though.
Starting point is 00:34:30 And then the others. Oh, you messed it up. That wasn't good at all. Yeah, sounds like it. They would have thought you were a Vietnamese. Oh, my gosh. There's the Vietnamese guys out there, and they go, he can't say it. Sounds better.
Starting point is 00:34:42 He can't. You should get shot through the door. Brian's not rhythmical at all, dude. Yeah, no. That was awful. Yeah. They don't even look, just right through the door. And they go out and they go, oh my gosh, you shot breakfast.
Starting point is 00:34:58 And then someone goes, I'll be honest with you, his nose whistling at night. It's not the end of the world. And truly, they would go it we're mad it shouldn't have happened we are sleeping terrific no i'll be honest with you since since that accident has happened i felt unbelievable every morning and the war changed that day uh the vietnamese would keep me alive there's a torture john mccain would just uh yeah we're gonna stop it yeah no more nose whistle we're gonna oh we're gonna do good when we're gonna bring uh one of yours in brian bates to do an interview
Starting point is 00:35:39 with you and they go that's it i thought you go waterboard me they're like no that's it just brian bates is going to interview you. Brian, put the nose in your mic. Put these headphones on. Hello. Just whistling as he has to go. Hi. Today,
Starting point is 00:36:03 he says he's doing all these things and then the guy's like what's up man something in your nose like no i don't i think everything's fine uh so how long what how long have you been spying on my friends here and they're i mean the guy's like i don't know where he just breaks. Yeah. Just stop it. I'll talk. I can't. He'll talk. I can't whistle right now. There it is. Chris Nunez.
Starting point is 00:36:33 I think my favorite thing about the podcast is the way each episode starts with Nate being very excited and the most talkative of the group, constantly stepping on the words of Beethoven and Notre Dame and talking over them. But throughout the episode, Nate slowly loses interest and talks less and less until that moment comes where he hasn't spoken for several minutes and inevitably says, all right, is that about it?
Starting point is 00:36:55 We're almost done. Love the show. Keep making us all laugh. I agree. And that feels like, and that, guess what? In the comments, that is it. Yeah, last week I was tired. But I do get, you know, got to keep it compelling.
Starting point is 00:37:13 And it's hard, you know. I can't do everything myself. So we got a guest coming up this week. We're going to talk about the lovely state of Alabama. There it is. Another state. Another state with our very funny fellow Nashville comedian from Alabama, Dusty Slade. All right.
Starting point is 00:37:38 All right. All right. My wife is from Alabama. Yeah. Not on the episode. And Aaron's from Alabama. And Aaron's from Alabama. So we had enough. And then my wife, she said, I would like to do it.
Starting point is 00:37:49 I said, I think we've done enough. I think you've been on enough. No, my wife is, they went to, they're at Universal in Florida. Yeah, right now. They sent me a picture. You have to wear a mask there the whole time. And I think Disney's like, Universal's Disney, they are on it. Oh, really?
Starting point is 00:38:10 Like, they're, I mean, that's their, like, you know, Disney's an unbelievable place. It's really, really. Have you been to Disney World? No, never been. Have y'all, have you been? I've been, yeah. It's a great time. As a kid, yeah.
Starting point is 00:38:20 Yeah. I've been to Visionland in Birmingham. You know Visionland? I don't know Visionland. I've been to Disney World more than Birmingham. Yeah. I almost got attacked by some pigeons. You went as a kid.
Starting point is 00:38:30 Well, you should go. It's changed a lot. There was no Epcot Center when I went. Was there not? I remember when it opened, like in 82 or something. You read about it in the paper? Yeah. The Epcot Center.
Starting point is 00:38:42 That's, yeah. I could have, when did it, oh, it started in 82. I think Epcot center opened like early 80s. Yeah. All right.
Starting point is 00:38:49 Cause I was gonna say, did I, did, I don't know if I saw it too. We went, I don't know. I don't remember. I've actually been a few times now just cause I now traveling so much,
Starting point is 00:38:58 I'll end up being near it. And so my daughter's actually, I have a joke about it, but, uh, she's been a few times now sometimes it's just like a vacation it's like i really enjoy it it's a good vacation to go do i like doing stuff it's something to do and this world does just run i mean they just it's done
Starting point is 00:39:14 really good they do a really good job but i think that i have friends that have gone now and they'd say that they're on you about the mask like i mean that's their they just walk around i mean you just it's not like you could be like, there's a lot of people. I'm sure you're probably pulling it down, walking around trying to, and someone pops up and is like, hey, put your mask on, and then you have to do it.
Starting point is 00:39:34 So it seems like a good thing. I went to Disney World as a pesticide salesman. I went with a bunch of pesticide salesmen. We were all real fat, drinking a lot, and eating fried stuff, and I tried to feed some pigeons, and then they just kept coming. And it was wild. So you were selling pesticide?
Starting point is 00:39:51 Yeah, I used to be a pesticide salesman for a long time. That would have been a big one to get. Disney World? Oh, yeah. Well, no, I wasn't selling pesticides. It was like a sales trip. Oh, okay. They were like, let's reward all these adults by sending them to Disney World.
Starting point is 00:40:09 There's pesticide salesmen. Yeah, they'll fit in. Yeah. Man, that would be a big contract to get. Yeah, imagine if you had come back with Disney World. Yeah. I mean, you'd own the company probably now. Yeah, I mean, I'd love to set up some weed killer displays.
Starting point is 00:40:24 You know what I mean? It'd be a lot of fun. The weed killer ride. Yeah. I mean, I'd love to set up some weed killer displays. You know what I mean? It'd be a lot of fun. The weed killer ride. Yeah. Oh, yeah. The weed killer ride would be called Weed Stop. That was our product, I think. Weed Stop?
Starting point is 00:40:32 Weed Stop. We had Bug Stop. We had, you know, we had products. We were competition for Roundup, right? Yeah. But our stuff was called Weed and Grass Killer. Yeah. Right?
Starting point is 00:40:41 Like we were straight generic. How are they doing now? I don't know i quit but i think they're doing fine i think they're doing about as well as they always were yeah yeah once at a sales meeting i had a boss go up and go he goes who's got it better than us and then everybody went nobody and i was like i don't know that that's true yeah i wasn't prepped on this i didn't know this chant but i'm pretty sure all of the competition has it better than us. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:41:07 Y'all are doing good to send y'all to Disney World. Yeah. That's a big trip. That was. Yeah, that was a good time. What were y'all talking about? Like when y'all have a sales meeting, y'all go to a sales, you're like, all right, this year we're going to do more weed stuff.
Starting point is 00:41:21 Yeah, exactly like that. That's what we would get in a room and they would go um hey this year we got a new uh space for a wasp and hornet killer on the shelf and then everybody would applaud the whole yeah and then my last year there i figured out i kind of got the rhythm of the applause break so i would start starting them oh this seems like a good one and then i kept a tally hundreds of applause breaks that you would do you were straight up a comedian that like already from that just thinking that that's what you were thinking about while they were talking having serious talk about weed stuff oh yeah if
Starting point is 00:41:56 they would have ever known that they would have been like well just quit now because you're because you're like i'm gonna quit oh yeah i've just, you know. Oh, I knew I was quitting every sales meeting. I was like, this is going to be my last one. Yeah. Eventually it was, but I, I landed, you know, on a retail, they have a, each item has a SKU number is what they call it. Right. And I landed in, in Orlando, got on the shuttle.
Starting point is 00:42:19 Another guy was there and he goes, Hey, what's your top five SKUs? And I was like, okay, dude, let's, let's take it it i'd have no idea first off but yeah don't get me in trouble i would if i if i i would be that guy probably though if i was into weed like if that if that was my thing i would be way like oh we're gonna new yeah we didn't try to go tell your wife that you know a little might as well just go all in. Might as well go all in. Yeah, I mean, it's exciting, you know, when you go from three facings to four. You're like, this is going to be good for me. What is it, three facings?
Starting point is 00:42:51 Yeah, like you have like three cans. You know, it's all mapped out. But when you get that fourth one, you're like, oh, this is going to be big. My sales are going to go through the roof here. Yeah. And what's a SKU? A SKU, it's like, it'll be a number. S-K-U.
Starting point is 00:43:03 It's a, yeah. And so that uh is that what they do they well that's the upc yeah they don't have a skew number and you just type that in the computer and they go do you have any more of these in stock and you go type it in and you're like oh yeah we do but who knows where they're at so if you have one shirt in five different sizes for merch you have five skews yeah that's just it's just like an individual thing. I did not know that. And then you're selling to like lawn and care places, Lowe's. Lowe's, Home Depot. Sometimes a Walmart. So there's a big deal to get into Lowe's and Home Depot.
Starting point is 00:43:33 They're like Shark Tank. When they get into like a big store, it's gigantic. Oh, yeah. I mean, it's a big time. But I was already in there. So mainly what I would do was go in and all the other companies would have all the space. Yeah. And then I would try to get a little space and then they would take it.
Starting point is 00:43:47 You talk to Lowe's. I would talk to the Lowe's manager. I'd go, hey, I'd like to get a little. And then my company always wanted me to promise that I would come and fix it every week. But I knew I couldn't, you know, because I had too much to do. I had 32 stores. Yeah. I was hung over.
Starting point is 00:43:59 So you have to go in and fix it. Like you got to correct, make sure it's all set up properly. Yeah. Oh, yeah. I got to go. So it's not like it's the stock people are doing that. You have to go in and fix it. You got to correct, make sure it's all set up properly. Yeah. Oh, yeah. I got to go in. So it's not like the stock people are doing that. You have to go do that. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:44:10 They'll do it, but it'll be bad when they do. So your constant job is to go to these stores and make sure. So when you see product at stores, that means the sales people, that's what they're having to go do. Yeah. Yeah. And there could be a whole war going on that we don't know about. I used to tear down the competition's displays and throw their shelves in the trash can.
Starting point is 00:44:31 And we would have real fights. And it was great. It was a lot of fun. Yeah. I like if someone just turned into this, they're like, well, I guess they're interviewing a weed killer. Yeah. That's what it sounds like.
Starting point is 00:44:41 And our accents don't not turn them off. They go, yeah, no, that makes sense. I used to find myself in bars a lot having conversations about lawns. Like, that's what I can help you with that lawn. That's what I'd do. I'd be drinking alone. Like, I can get rid of this lawn fungus for you. Yeah, I know.
Starting point is 00:44:59 Could you still do it? Probably in South Carolina. Tennessee has got different grass. Oh, wow. Could you tell grass on a golf course South Carolina. Tennessee has got different grass. Oh, wow. Could you tell grass on a golf course? I know you don't watch golf. No, probably not like that. Like Bermuda grass?
Starting point is 00:45:11 Do you know that kind of stuff? No, we had St. Augustine and centipede. That's the ones I could tell. Yeah. But I wasn't that good. I read a lot of the back of the bottles. Yeah. Now I know this, you know?
Starting point is 00:45:23 Yeah. Like where some guys would, yeah, they know. In in golf it's very much people know the the grass it's pretty crazy i don't know the grass but they're like what kind of fairways you got and i'm like i don't know georgia or oh yeah and there's and it's a different and but it's uh like when i just played in arizona i want to see someone at georgia it was very nice oh yeah and it was like the that's where you hit and the divots like it's this i and i if i'm if i'm right and then uh it's very thick divots it's where you see on tv where the divot flies up they call it a pancake it looks like a pancake lands ahead and it's like you just i mean you just cut into the grass it's the greatest feeling alive
Starting point is 00:46:01 is uh just you know and then they have bermuda i think is tighter grass maybe and so it's like a little bit the fairways are just tighter tighter cut i guess and uh maybe harder i don't know so this stuff only works on particular types of grass well yeah you know it depends on you know you got it's supposed to be i mean i feel like that this is like you know i haven't talked about this in forever but i used to stand in a low and go yeah it's supposed to be i mean i feel like that this is like you know i haven't talked about this in forever but i used to stand in a lowe's and go yeah it's all about the vein structure of the grass you know it's like it's a 2 4 d and then now i used to sell this one chemical that everybody's talking about it's killing everybody all the time and i'm like oh the hard push yeah yeah
Starting point is 00:46:38 you know but i used to breathe it in the stores would have to uh they would a bottle would break and they were like we need you to take this out of here so i'd put it in the trunk of my car i'm driving around with it for weeks i have no idea it even smells my buddy gets in the car he's like what's that smell i was like i don't know i don't even smell anything anymore well go show some weed stops love you know like i like that you can you see you're throwing them a bone after all these just thanks for getting dusty to the point where he can do comedy full time weeds can't hide from spectracide that's what that's to say you know what i mean yeah which is the truth it is you know it is true it is true uh so uh alabama uh i mean we're i feel
Starting point is 00:47:22 like we're already in it, talking about it. I'm talking about weeds. It's how I pictured the episode would go. Talking about specific types of grass in South Carolina. Yeah. That's a good start to the Alabama. Is that, so you moved, where were you born? I was born in Alabama.
Starting point is 00:47:38 Yeah. And I lived there until I was 21. Yeah. And then I moved to South Carolina. Yeah, for comedy or anything? No, I just was like, I got to get out of here. And not that I don't like Alabama. It was mainly my town.
Starting point is 00:47:51 And not that I don't like my town, but I was like, I got to get out of here. Yeah. You know what I mean? I'm about to go there next week and do comedy. What town was it? I'm going to Auburn. I grew up in a town called Opelika right next to Auburn. Opelika.
Starting point is 00:48:00 Yeah. Yeah, it's a good time. We had a good time there. Were you. My neighbor Felix went to Auburn. I'm joking. But were you an Auburn fan? Well, I always like to say, where I come from, you're either an Alabama fan or you went to college. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:48:18 But I didn't go to college, so roll tide. But yeah, I mean, my dad's an alabama fan my mom's an auburn fan they're divorced and they both take it very personal yeah like if i say i like alabama around my mom it's like it almost hurts her feelings yeah so i've just kind of always towed the line but yeah i like alabama that's something i think people that aren't if you if you haven't spent a lot of time in alabama i think you might not understand how seriously people take it when we had Alabama Auburn day do you have Alabama Auburn day at school growing up did you ever have that
Starting point is 00:48:49 I don't know you didn't have you didn't go to school with uniforms did you no oh no yeah oh no you said that like you said that like most people did that's how you just asked that I mean talk about out of touch right here now guy I mean mean, good night. Whole family went to Notre Dame. Oh, wait, you guys didn't do uniform. I bet you lose. What did you guys wear? Jumpsuits? Did you wear?
Starting point is 00:49:13 I mean, I technically had a uniform because I only had like five shirts. Yeah. You know, but. Yeah. Whoa. Oh, heck of a start, Aaron. Yeah. All right.
Starting point is 00:49:22 Let's reel it back a little bit. In elementary school, though, I did have an Alabama shirt that I would wear, and then I had a maroon sweatsuit, and the shirt was real big, so it would be like I would wear the sweatsuit and then the shirt over it. So there was no hope for me for style. Did you – well, what were you going to say about Alabama? Y'all had Alabama Auburn Day? We used to have Alabama Auburn Day every year at school where you wore gear for either team yeah and i remember
Starting point is 00:49:50 one kid being like i don't like either team and they're like we better pick one oh wow because that's we're not we don't play this can i wear a florida shirt no yeah you can't yeah wow you know i find alabama such a long state northern alabama obviously very much like tennessee because it's around the border but you go down to like like Tennessee Because it's right on the border But you go down to like Do shows in Mobile Which is on the Gulf Coast Yeah
Starting point is 00:50:09 It's just a different Type of person down there Right It's Taller Yeah a little bit taller For sure Yeah it does change
Starting point is 00:50:18 The accent gets Gets deeper The further you get down there Yeah Yeah But Mobile is nice Or is it or like if you get to the gulf shores there's areas that are gulf shores alabama this is a really nice really
Starting point is 00:50:30 nice area yeah yeah yeah like it's a place to be and so you you grew up i know you talk about your act you grew up in a church you're living in trailer park i yeah my parents divorced my mom moved to a trailer park yeah yeah so you got the full experience of alabama oh yeah my dad lives on a farm my mom lived in a trailer park yeah i mean you're what people think about oh yeah it's like what they when they like alabama it's like what do you grow up in taylor park dead on a farm you're like i don't know all right i'll stop you when you're wrong go ahead yeah i mean we were into nascar wrestling you know wrestling before it was we called it wrestling before it was fun when it was like on local tv yeah yeah we used to go to columbus georgia and see rick flair and sting was it uh do you ever remember seeing anybody early like big like stone cold ever would you
Starting point is 00:51:16 ever remember that i don't think so no yeah because it was like those early if you ever watched well i read stone cold's book which is i don't know i probably talked about it's very funny i read a that i read his book but his book is read I don't know, I probably talked about it. It's very funny. I read his, A, that I read his book. But his book is read, it's how I should read a book, though. It's a lot of like, let me tell you something. And then I went over, I mean, there's, Rhythmical was not used once in that book. And I mean, I flew through it. I was like, what a quick read.
Starting point is 00:51:39 It's just very tiny words. But he started in wrestling in those circuits. They would go to Memphis a lot, but like those kind of things where you would see those people come through. And then they become, I mean, he becomes the most famous person alive, which is pretty, The Rock going through that kind of stuff. Pretty crazy.
Starting point is 00:51:59 I remember seeing that guy El Gigante. Remember that guy? Real tall. He was only around a little while. I don't know. I just love that. El Gigante. Remember that guy? Real tall. He was only around a little while. I don't know. I love that. El Gigante. The Spanish Giant? Yeah. He wasn't wearing that uniform, though. Whatever that is back then.
Starting point is 00:52:14 Oh, wow. He is pretty big. He's like the Great Khali. Yeah, we saw that guy. The Steiner Brothers back before he was Big Papa Pump. Yeah, wow. They got huge. That's pretty cool. I liked a lot of people. Diner Brothers back before he was Big Papa Pump. Yeah. Yeah. So, yeah. Wow. They got huge. Yeah. Yeah. Wow.
Starting point is 00:52:26 That's pretty cool. I liked a lot of people. We didn't watch wrestling. I would see it on TV. I remember watching it younger where they, it was a big back then where you'd have the matches like, you know, Saturday Hulk Hogan would wrestle like a guy, you know? Oh, yeah. Yeah. It was just, that was, you would get to see Hulk Hogan.
Starting point is 00:52:43 Like Mike Smith. It's not a, they actually did it, I think, in a good way. And the fact that you, to see the big events, it was pay-per-view. Like, and in the regular events, you would have, then Monday Night Raw was like, oh, you see, there'd be a couple of matches that were like pretty big matches. But back, I remember someone, it was very funny, someone would know a guy that was one of the regular guys, and they would always be like, oh, I know a wrestler. You're like, oh, what's his name? They're like, Brandon Bale?
Starting point is 00:53:10 I don't know. I'm making that name up. And you're like, oh, he's one of the guys that just has red trunks. And you're like, oh. But that was a guy to know. And you're like, wow, that's pretty cool. He's on. It's like knowing a Washington senator.
Starting point is 00:53:24 Was that the Harlem Globetrotter? Washington Generals. Generals. Washington Generals. You're like, I know a guy that plays professional basketball. You're like, oh, that's cool. I would rather meet a guy from the Washington Generals. Than a Harlem Globetrotter?
Starting point is 00:53:37 Don't you want to hear from a guy that their team has to lose every game? Yeah, how he gets up every day. Yeah, how he stays positive. The Harlem Globetrotters are like, what are you going to talk about? What I do is I throw it around my waist a hundred times. A couple years ago, the Harlem Globetrotters came to an open
Starting point is 00:53:57 mic here in Nashville. Oh, really? Out of nowhere. At Third Coast. Were you there that night? Yeah. Did you perform in front of them? Yep. How'd it go? They just came to watch a show? They were in town for an event, right? Yeah. They bounced a ball off.
Starting point is 00:54:10 They went to Third Coast Comedy Club for the open mic and just showed up. Wow. And then when Brian went on, they threw a ball off his head. And they hit right off his forehead and they caught it. And the crowd is a new form of heckling. And he goes, all right, sir. There's no comeback to that. Bucket of confetti. I heard they were like a great audience yeah they were
Starting point is 00:54:28 yeah because they know what performance is about and all that makes a difference so yeah so they were very supportive they're pretty easy to spot when they walked in yeah i guess they're all yeah all of them but one one guy played at memphis and i remember hearing about him he played college in memphis and he could jump. I mean, he could, like, touch the top of a backboard. Yeah. And I think those guys go there. Like, if you can't make pro, then you're like, if you get into that, it's not a bad gig.
Starting point is 00:54:54 And the Harlem Goat Trotters are just a wonderful, just perfect entertainment. I think it's so fun. You get to take kids. You know, the people up front, they get involved. It's such a just awesome thing to go watch. Why not just have two teams though that actually compete? That's what I wonder. I think it would not get serious because then they couldn't do all the crazy stuff because it would be like two. I think they have played each other. Look and see if they've ever won.
Starting point is 00:55:27 I almost think the Washington Generals have won a game. And then I think they've even played – because the Washington Generals, it's not like they're bad. They're very good. Well, it's all an act. I mean, yeah, they're good athletes. It's a show. If you were a kid, big Harlem Globetrotters fan,
Starting point is 00:55:41 and you went to the one where the Washington Generals won. Oh, yeah. That would be like – Yeah. I mean, that would be like being to the one where the Washington Generals won. Oh, yeah. That would be like. Yeah. I mean, that'd be like being a kid that is a Washington Generals fan. Like you had a guy, I mean, they say he shows up and he loves the Generals. He's like, this is going to be the day. I used to have a joke about how all these teams say, we need to get back to playing
Starting point is 00:55:58 Chicago Cubs. You know, they're always whatever. That's what the halftime speech Washington Generals. Yeah. I mean, we haven't won since 1971. We need to get off playing like we play. We don't need to be the Washington generals at all. Yeah, it's a fun.
Starting point is 00:56:13 Harlem Go-To's are great. Did they lose? So they've played. The Globetrotters have beaten them about 16,000 times. Wow. And the generals have won anywhere between three to six games, they think. Wow. What happened those times?
Starting point is 00:56:28 On accident. They win on accident? How do you win 16,000 and lose three? Yeah. It had to have been an accident. Yeah. They lost in Martin, Tennessee. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:56:39 Like, what happens to that now? Curly Neal did not play in the game. Oh. So I wonder, are they trying to like somewhat, yeah. I mean, how would you, you'd much rather talk to a guy that plays on them to be like, what are y'all trying to do? Yeah. Do you just, are you like, yeah, we let them,
Starting point is 00:56:54 when they're out there dribbling forever, we just let them do it. I mean, there's nothing called when you go, well, a guy touched the ball that was in the rafters, so I guess we're not calling out of bounds this game. They pull each other's trucks down. Yeah. Like, how is losing every day better than just having a regular job? Right?
Starting point is 00:57:11 Like, I would be like, you know what? Maybe I will go back to selling pesticides. Yeah. Instead of getting my pants pulled down and losing $16,000. Would you do comedy if you just bombed every set? Oh, no. I could never handle it. I can bomb once or twice and be like,
Starting point is 00:57:25 that was pretty fun. And then after that, I'm like, I got to help. So who would be someone that is like a Washington General of comedy? Someone that, like, Tony. I can't say. I was going to say I have a few. I got a few.
Starting point is 00:57:37 Yeah. No, but that likes it. What's his face? Jim Carrey played him in the movie uh andy kaufman yeah but andy kaufman and then who was his alter ego oh yeah tony uh clifton tony clifton yeah tony clifton would be like a washington like he does not want to ever do good he wants to neil hamburger is like yeah yeah always but no but people like neil hamburger so maybe it's even more like that because but they're like the Washington Generals too.
Starting point is 00:58:06 Yeah. Yeah. Hmm. I bet it's a little bit like professional wrestling. I think the good guy lost more back in the day by accident
Starting point is 00:58:13 because they didn't have it all refined. But now it's much more scripted. But if the Washington Generals were like a wrestler bad guy, like they really like taunted them. I feel like the good guy
Starting point is 00:58:24 in this scenario is taunting the other people. Yeah. Yeah. That's true. B feel like the good guy in this scenario is taunting the other people. That's true. Bouncing the ball, pulling their trunks down. 16,000 times to three. There is just going to be three times. You're like, yeah. The fan reaction says they looked at
Starting point is 00:58:39 us like we killed Santa Claus. Yeah. Wow. Did you already read this? Why they lost, what ended up happening? No. They were just goofing around. They just lost track of the score. And all the while, the generals were actually trying. Oh, really?
Starting point is 00:58:53 And then they just looked up, and they were like, oh, man, we've got two minutes left, and we're down 12. And then they tried to come back, and they couldn't in time. And they legit tried to go. They just caught them sleeping, dude. I wonder if the generals are really playing hard then. No. I guess they were that game. Maybe back in 1971.
Starting point is 00:59:08 But maybe they were missing their kind of crazy shots. It's like six times out of 16,000. I think that one, right? They go, all right, let's give them a game. They were popping champagne back there. Can you imagine? We did it. I think I would love it to be at a game where it'd be great as a comedian
Starting point is 00:59:26 to say the only Harlem Go-Tartars game I went to is They Lost. Yeah. That would be – And to have that story. But if you went to that game, you would tell like, this has never happened, so it's good. It's better than saying I went to watch them. I went and saw them lose.
Starting point is 00:59:40 Yeah. To be at that game. That'd be a ticket you could sell. You could sell that on eBay. Someone would buy that ticket over anything else. So children cried. If it's said on the ticket, they're
Starting point is 00:59:52 going to lose this game. If it was just the date and they go, what's so special about this date? After the fact. If you're after the fact and you go, what's so special about this date? And you go, if I would hang up a ticket to go like, they're like, you went to the Harlem Go-Tartars in 1971. I'm like, actually, that's a ticket from the first game that Washington generals won. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:00:09 People were like, Oh wow. Wow. Isn't that, it's more of a collector's item. That would be really cool. So, uh,
Starting point is 01:00:15 all right. Harlem go-tart is weed killing. We're in it. We're in it. Jammer jammer baby. From Alabama to Harlem. Just like that. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:00:24 Uh, yeah, yeah. It to Harlem, just like that. Just like that. Yeah. It doesn't take much to get there. So, Alabama, where are you from in Alabama? Montgomery. Montgomery. Which is like 30, 40 minutes from Opelika. Wow.
Starting point is 01:00:38 Not too far. Did you guys hear about each other? There's... I've been to Montgomery a few times though it's a it's a lot of fun yeah capital of Alabama
Starting point is 01:00:49 Montgomery is the capital of Alabama yeah it's also the first capital of the confederacy that's right kind of highfalutin Aaron said he wished
Starting point is 01:00:55 it still was but yeah that's what he told me it's kind of highfalutin with your uniforms you know stuff like that
Starting point is 01:01:03 yeah but you guys you didn't have uniforms we did we did not have uniforms. Did you guys? I had some JNCOs that I wore for a while. You went all public school. All public school.
Starting point is 01:01:11 Yeah. Did you go to college? I didn't go to college. Well, we have a similar college story, I think. I did community college for about two days. Yeah. And then I was like, I'm not into this. I had one dude from my high school in the class, and I was like, I don't even know what
Starting point is 01:01:23 I'm doing in here. There was no girls in my class. I'm like, this is not the college experience I was promised into this. I had one dude from my high school in the class, and I was like, I don't even know what I'm doing in here. There was no girls in my class. I'm like, this is not the college experience I was promised. And I was like, I'm just going to work at Papa John's for a while. And they're almost like, no, it is the college experience you were promised. They look at your grades, you're like, actually, this is exactly this. This is the one you've earned. Yeah, that's true.
Starting point is 01:01:43 You deserve this one. exactly that's the one you've earned yeah yeah that's true you deserve this one so yeah just always play uh opelika and sports as a kid so i was always out there elmore county and all talisee and all those oh yeah man so i've been out there i did football one year that was yeah oh wow yeah one year ninth grade why oh okay eighth grade middle school yeah how'd it go well i played one play and i didn't know what to do so it was the ball it was down pretty quick that was this rudy moment yeah a rudy moment but they hiked it and then the play was over and then i went back to the sidelines took my helmet off and was like i'm glad that's over you know i wanted to quit but my mom i came out with all my stuff one day after practice my mom was like what are you doing i was like i'm like, I'm quitting. She was like, all right, go tell your coach.
Starting point is 01:02:26 And I was like, all right. And then I played the rest of the year. I didn't want to tell my – I wanted to walk out. Yeah. And so I just would practice. Were you into sports? No. No.
Starting point is 01:02:35 Still now? I just wanted to be cheered for at the pep rally. I thought, this is fun. I like backyard football. I kind of dominate in the trailer park. I thought, this will be great. But not the same. I had of dominate in the trailer park. I thought this would be great, but not the same. I had the same, my football experience.
Starting point is 01:02:51 I only played a very little bit and I kind of quit. Like, I mean, I love sports and I play a ton of golf now, but I was like the same way with, once the kids got bigger and like were taking it more serious and I wasn't, I was like, oh, I'm going to get hurt. Yeah. Like, it's like when you go from 12 to – like, 12-year-old baseball, but you're still pitching on the mound that's a smaller field, a little league field.
Starting point is 01:03:12 Yeah. And those kids are close. Yeah. And then 12-year – 11-year-olds are not throwing hard. 12-year-olds, they start throwing the ball, dude. And you're so close to them that you're kind of like – you're like, all right. Then I remember going to 13-year-old league where the mound moves back. And then that was like my greatest greatest that was my home run off of
Starting point is 01:03:28 walk that didn't count joe yeah was a 13 year old league and uh that was the best because the it was like they couldn't the kids weren't strong enough to throw it hard yet so i and you're and then your second bay i played second base and you're far away from the ball it was like i don't know i was like petrified of getting just hit in the face with this baseball. And then 14-year-old was like, oh, kids are back to serious, and they're really throwing some feet. Yeah, yeah. And then that's when I was kind of like, all right, I'm out.
Starting point is 01:03:54 That's the age, too, when half the kids have hit puberty and the other half haven't. So there's men playing with kids. There's men. I remember this guy, Jeremy Lyons, that went to our school, and he played in college, could have played pro, one of the best athletes I've ever seen. But I remember playing baseball against him when I was 12 years old,
Starting point is 01:04:12 just because we all grew up in the same town. And it looked like, at 12, it looked like your dad was in center field. Oh, yeah. He was just enormous. I mean, just to see, I mean, he had legs, just enormous legs. And you just look out there there and you're like, is he supposed to be out there? That's how football was for me.
Starting point is 01:04:30 They wanted us to line up 10 yards apart and then run at each other and hit. And I was like, oh, I don't like this. I don't know why we're doing this. I think we would do better now because now they're very more sensitive to kids getting hurt. We came up in an era where the rules were off. We had the same thing where they did. Bull in the ring? Bull in the ring.
Starting point is 01:04:53 It's illegal now. In Alabama, that's illegal. So I never had to do that growing up because they're always like, that's the olden times. I had to do it. That's where kids get hurt. So I remember doing bull in the ring. I played with old hickory bulldogs.
Starting point is 01:05:05 Oh, the bulldogs too the Opelika bulldogs oh yeah yeah and so dogs yeah no dogs
Starting point is 01:05:10 and then so they you have a single stripe or a double stripe this was like probably 11 years old single stripe double stripe
Starting point is 01:05:19 so if you weighed too much and you were double stripe you had to play the offensive line yeah so the big kids that were like on the line they would make them run laps with trash can with trash bag trash cans the trash bags on them to lose weight because they got under the weight like cutting
Starting point is 01:05:35 weight you play running back they could play running back i did i did that every year yeah and so they because i was always right on the cusp and so they'd make you because then so then you who should be on the line, is now running with the ball because he lost just enough weight to do it. So that's when you're like, well, that's not – So what happens with this? I mean, they knew I was never going to be a bull, so this was never something I experienced.
Starting point is 01:05:59 Well, so I was bull in the ring. So the idea of it, you stand in the middle, the team's around you in a circle, and you just make circles, and he just yells out numbers like 25. And if you're 25, you got to run and you just boom, boom, you guys hit it. But you don't know where they're coming from. He's just yelling out people. So I remember doing it when I played when I was a boy, and I was like, I don't like this at all. And what I would do is I'd always break my own helmet and then be like, I can't get this stupid helmet. And I'd go off to the side and try to fix the helmet the whole time of playing bull in the ring.
Starting point is 01:06:31 Because I did not. Oh, is that? That's not it. This is some sort of variation of it. The kind everybody thinks of is the whole team's circled up and there's just one guy in the middle and he doesn't know where anybody's coming from. So somebody can come hit you right from the back,
Starting point is 01:06:45 and you just got to kind of spin around and watch the hole. The exact example that I gave you right before Aaron said it again. The straight-up exact. Well, your example was so good that we still needed more. No one needed it. I tried to reword it. I think you zoned out. You went into Aaron Land for a little bit,
Starting point is 01:07:04 and you had to read some ads for Aaron Land. They've started their own podcast. He looks slick, everybody. It airs during this podcast. And so they, yeah, so you, but I remember I was like, I don't want to do this. It was insane. And I was like tiny.
Starting point is 01:07:21 And I'm like, and the coaches would want, first time I ever heard, I think someone curse was one of my football coaches. And this is what I played for the Donaldson Warriors. I played two years. And then, and they, he would always call me Nat. And so I picked my number. I was, so we played for the Donaldson Warriors.
Starting point is 01:07:41 So we had their colors of the Washington Redskins or the Washington football team, which I actually like the name of the Washington football team. I actually don't mind it. I actually really do like it. You didn't want to keep it Washington football team? I actually think they should. I like the uniform.
Starting point is 01:07:53 I like the numbers on the side of the helmets. And I actually like WFT, Washington football team. It just kind of feels very old. That's a very old franchise. And so it feels very old school to me that they do it. I don't know. Do they have plans to replace it with something? I honestly don't think they should.
Starting point is 01:08:07 And, you know, not trying to be politically correct about any of it. It's just I'm saying I like that name better than even the Redskins. I like that old school uniform. I love it. I love the uniform, dude. It's like a good Alabama uniform. Yeah. And Washington football team is straight to the point.
Starting point is 01:08:23 To the state of Alabama. I was trying to do a joke about it. I feel football team is straight to the point. to the state of Alabama. I was trying to do a joke about it. I feel like the joke's been done. But it's like that because it is ridiculous to be as a grown man. You're, you know,
Starting point is 01:08:33 you're like, who are you guys going to watch? The Ravens? The Ravens are playing the Redskins. Let's name them all the football team. Yeah, it's like
Starting point is 01:08:40 they should all be the Tennessee football team. Yeah. And then you're cheering for your state, you know. Let's change the football. So when I played for the Warriors, I was a big Art Monk fan. And they had Gary Clark.
Starting point is 01:08:54 No, I'm sorry. I was a Gary Clark fan. And I think he was number 84. Or 82. 82 or 84. And 84. Yeah. And so I was like, oh, so you you gotta go pick your jersey and i was like
Starting point is 01:09:06 i'll be gary clark's my favorite football player i go i'll be gary clark and i go uh number 81 and then uh that's art monk there's the wrong guy so then i became a big art monk guy and i was like all right well i'm on to art monk now and i remember having to think i mean you know because as a kid you think you can't look this stuff up there's no internet yeah it's only what i see right on tv so then i got i got confused and i was like i think he's 81 and then i just had to become a big art monk guy i had one interception against uh all right look at that that's a real career real career one interception and they said the other kid's name because they thought what had to be we had one kid that was really good so they just said it was him that did the interception because they just assumed it yeah because there's no way and
Starting point is 01:09:49 we played this school una uh which is samarna which uh sunny gray who gave me those bats he played for you know they were the best they were they were the best team i was i was number three and my brother-in-law would wear his dale earnhardt hat when he would come to the games that's how he would support that's how he would support me right he's like i normally i wouldn't wear this yeah so your brother-in-law came to your kid high school things yeah so how is your sister how much older is she oh she's like 10 years older than oh yeah we got different dads we got a whole thing we got okay we got quite the family tree going. Yeah, that was, yeah. I got a younger sister.
Starting point is 01:10:25 You kind of said it like, you know, like his uniform coming. Like, you're like, you know, guys, when your brother-in-law comes to your kid when you're a child and your brother-in-law's at the game and you're like, what? You're like, well, I was lined up against my uncle. It's crazy. So I'm lined up against my uncle. And you're like, how old's your uncle? He's my age. I got another sister that was born when I graduated high school.
Starting point is 01:10:45 Wow. Yeah, and she's not related to my other sisters. So she would be someone that could be – if you had a kid already, she would be an aunt. You'd have a kid. Like in high school. I could have had a kid in high school, yeah. She would be older than her aunt.
Starting point is 01:11:01 Yeah. Wow, that'd be something. I should have did that. Straight up. Just for the story? You know, I got, and when I played football, I got stabbed by a girl with a pencil in school.
Starting point is 01:11:13 She stabbed me several times in the corner, and I never saw her again. But I got to miss a day of football practice, and that was a lot of fun. It was worth it. I don't want people listening not to think we're trying to drum up some alabama stories these are natural conversations that are happening two guys from alabama this just gets pulled out this is what's naturally happening
Starting point is 01:11:34 people think i make up stuff all the time yeah i'm like no we i was living in it i mean we were i mean i had a great time but laura went to my wife went to uh she went to a college which i need to ask her more because i don't need to do a joke about it. But she went to, her first college she went to was in a mall. And it was like, she was like taking, she just said she remembers just taking these classes and being like, you know, I'm learning about history next to, you know, a nail salon, like penny shoes or something. Like you're hearing people walk around shopping at a mall. Where's that at? She was living in Huntsville.
Starting point is 01:12:05 Okay. And so in Huntsville. And so, yeah, Alabama is, I go down there all, I have to go down there all the time now. I don't think I went a ton growing up, but I am there the most now. Cause we have a brother-in-law in Birmingham. And so, yeah, we're, they're all, they're all down there. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:12:25 I mean, Alabama's the best. I used to do the whole swimming in creeks thing, and that's why I love country. Every country song, I'm like, I know what that's about. Yeah. Even if I haven't had the experience, country takes me there. Yeah. Yeah, you get that.
Starting point is 01:12:40 Yeah. You were never too far from that experience. Right. I'm like, I can see that happening. Yeah, Tennessee's got – I feel like Nashville's a little not, you can go, there's, you leave Nashville and you're in the same places as Alabama. Oh, yeah. It feels like maybe all of Alabama is like that kind of rural kind of feeling
Starting point is 01:12:57 where Tennessee, Nashville, you know, I grew up in that, growing up here. But when I moved to Chicago, I was like, oh, we're a Southern. Oh, yeah. Like that's when you really, you're like, oh, we're a southern. Oh, yeah. That's when you really are like, oh, no, I'm very southern. It's getting fancy around here, though. I went to do a gig at a hotel downtown Nashville, and I had my hat on, and the lady was like, excuse me, we don't allow ball caps
Starting point is 01:13:16 in here. I'm like, well, this is a trucker hat. I don't know what you're talking about. And the Napa Auto parts. And then you got into your football story where you go, I missed a day of football once because a girl stabbed me. That's what your response should be. I'll bring it in at any time.
Starting point is 01:13:36 Always trying to get it in. Yeah. I mean, it's a story that needs to be told. It should be told. Did she get suspended? I never saw her again. Yeah. I got one day of in-school suspension because I had pushed her head first.
Starting point is 01:13:47 Oh, now we're getting to the bottom of this. Well, she stole something from me. Oh, now we're getting even more. And then I pushed her head, and then she stabbed me, and then a couple other dudes. She didn't go to the school. She got me the worst, though. I got pinned up in a corner.
Starting point is 01:14:01 She was pretty large. She got a couple other guys who were just in the way? No, I think she had stabbed those earlier in the day. She went on a spree, dude. If you would have played bull in the ring, you might have been able to handle it and defend yourself. That's true. Where'd you get stabbed at?
Starting point is 01:14:17 I got in the arm and twice in the back. Because I was like, ah, you know, I was pinned up. Bull in the ring is when they're circled up. Yeah. Aaron, go ahead. And then everybody's got a uniform on, but your uniform is attacking your own same uniform. Yes. So you guys, and that's when, I mean, that's when lead poisoning was your biggest fear.
Starting point is 01:14:38 As a kid? Yeah. Getting stabbed with a pencil because of lead poisoning, I was like, it was like, you felt like you're cancer back then. You're just like, we're all going to die the lead poisoning i was like it was it was like you felt like your cancer back you're just like every we're all gonna die from lead poisoning really i i thought i just remember being talked about a lot i don't know maybe it was me and i remember too they say if it breaks off under your skin it's you're like done i'm from the graphite generation so oh y'all had a clicker i had a lot of those but even the number two pencils they didn't use real lead in
Starting point is 01:15:03 them anymore. We weren't really worried about it, I don't think. I was just like, I wish that I didn't get stabbed. I think the power lines you lived under probably offset each other. Yeah, it really pulls it out of there. It pulls all the lead out. Yeah, it activates it. Could you fly as a kid because you lived so close to those power lines?
Starting point is 01:15:21 Dusty, let's go. How is it growing up in trailer park? Is it just, I mean, it was normal it was great i always say that the worst thing was like the address you know because i'm like everybody's got a normal address and i'm like lot eight morse trailer park i have to write down so everybody knows but living there was great you know except for any kind of storm yeah it's not just tornadoes it's like every storm you're like this could this could take this. This is it. Did y'all get hit with anything?
Starting point is 01:15:46 We had an ice storm once. It froze a tree limb, and it fell and stabbed through the roof, and then it collapsed the shelf of these ceramic owls that my mom had. Wow. So we had ceramic pieces all over the place. I mean, yeah, so you wouldn't be worried about lead poisoning with that kind of threat. Right, right. Every night you go to bed, it's going. Yeah, pencils are really the least of our worries. mean, yeah, so you wouldn't be worried about lead poisoning with that kind of threat. Right, right.
Starting point is 01:16:05 Every night you go to bed, it's going. Yeah, pencils are really the least of our worries. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Is it, I think I would like a trailer park too. I like a community. Yeah. I think community is very, I like a community. Yeah, my sister and her husband moved to the trailer next to us.
Starting point is 01:16:20 Yeah. So we had two trailers right there. I love it. We had a little courtyard out there. A little compound. Bunch of kids, not really related to us yeah so we had two trailers i love that little courtyard out there compound bunch of kids not really related to us like you know my brother-in-law's gotta you know got two kids from a previous marriage and it was kids all over the place and how many how many trailers are in that park how big it was probably 15 and it was like a row of trailers and then a dirt road
Starting point is 01:16:41 and then like the backyard of people's regular houses yeah so their backyard was like looking at the trailer but few enough that you pretty much knew everybody in it oh yeah that's cool yeah it was a good time and then the bus would just come and pick y'all all up yeah and the end of the school just knew y'all were the trailer park bus oh yeah i mean i'm sure i mean there was well there was a couple of trailer yeah yeah i mean we weren't the only ones but actually there was a lot of asian kids Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, we weren't the only ones. But actually, there was a lot of Asian kids in my trailer park, too. So it was kind of like we had a pretty exotic stop. Like pretty diverse.
Starting point is 01:17:10 Yeah. Yeah. Wow. What brought them to Alabama? I don't know. Yeah. Now we have the Kia plant pretty close to where I live. So we got that.
Starting point is 01:17:18 Yeah. It was the Hyundai plant in Montgomery was big when that opened up. Yeah. Yeah. I think they were Laotian. Yeah. And yeah, we had a great time. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:17:28 We used to play football at the bus stop. We'd be all sweaty getting on the bus. Man, as a kid, you just don't, just to think about how much you don't want to shower. Like they just, like even my daughter who they just wants to play and they can go to school. They never feel gross. Yeah. You know, like I can take two showers a day. Like go to school they never feel gross yeah you know like i i can take two showers a day like you just really i feel gross and i want to take a shower and they just as a kid you're yeah you go and you're like you're gonna you're sweating all day they don't care you're not wearing deodorant not wearing deodorant it doesn't matter you don't you know
Starting point is 01:18:00 uh the other day when we went sledding, when it snowed that week, my daughter, she had ice in her hair because it was just so cold. That's how cold it was. And she wanted it out. She was going to our friend's house, and maybe we had to come in and comb her hair. She was like, my hair's a mess. It looks terrible.
Starting point is 01:18:19 And it was like the first kind of her acting like a teenager in a way. It broke my heart. I had to sit there, and I had to comb it. She's like, how does it look? And I'm like, what does it matter? I was like, you don't. But it was like her caring about that kind of stuff. And you're like, ah.
Starting point is 01:18:34 But she's still a little girl. All right. Let's learn. Let's learn. Let's see how well you guys know Alabama. All right. You guys know the- That was funny the way you said that.
Starting point is 01:18:45 Yeah. Let's learn. Let's learn. You guys know the- That was funny the way he said that. Yeah. Let's learn. Let's learn. You guys know the state bird of Alabama? I think it's the mockingbird. Oh. Oh, the yellow hammer. I was going to say the rammer jammer yellow hammer, baby.
Starting point is 01:18:56 The yellow hammer. Alabama's the yellow hammer state. Okay. Wow. But I got it on the second try, though. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What's the rammer jammer? What is it?
Starting point is 01:19:03 The yellow bird? I think it's a yellow bird or is the i think it's a yellow bird yeah i know there's yellow hammer brewing company they have a nice beer that's in alabama's fight song right yeah or not the fight song but a chant that they do yeah after the game rammer jammer yellow hammer give them heck alabama yeah uh k ivy's the governor of Alabama. She's the oldest governor in the U.S. Right now. 76. All right.
Starting point is 01:19:27 Good for her. All right. Yeah. Yeah. It was named after the Alabama River, which that was named after an Indian tribe that lived in. So the Alabama State was named after Alabama River? Mm-hmm. Okay.
Starting point is 01:19:38 Opelika is a Native American term for great swamp. And there is no swamps there. Yeah. That's why it's great. It's not great eitheramps there. Yeah. That's why it's great. It's not great either. Yeah. That's why it's great. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:19:48 Because you go, well, this isn't even like a swamp. Exactly. Yeah. Have you been to a real swamp? It's a nightmare. Yeah. Lee County, Chambers County, where I grew up, is like the last area of the Creek Indians.
Starting point is 01:19:59 Yeah. And my dad bought some land once, plowed it up. We found arrowheads everywhere. Oh, that's cool. Oh, wow. That's really cool. Yeah. Yeah, that's really cool. Nashville's a great desert. And you'd be like, well, we're not a desert.
Starting point is 01:20:09 You're like, exactly. Yeah, it's the best kind. A lot of trees, water. Largest city is Birmingham. Oldest city is Mobile, founded in 1702. Huntsville's going to be the biggest city soon, the trajectory of it. Yeah, well, that's the follow-up show. Is Huntsville? going to be the biggest city soon. The trajectory of it. What's the follow-up show? Is Huntsville?
Starting point is 01:20:28 That's Alabama Part 2. The future of Alabama? I want more questions, though. Do you got any other questions? What's the largest employer in Alabama? NASA. Oh, yeah. Maybe so. We'll say that. That's what we want it to be, but I don't think that's what it is. I'm guessing
Starting point is 01:20:43 Walmart. I'll say NASA or beef jerky. what we want it to be but i don't think that's what it is i'm guessing walmart i'll say nasa or beef jerky go ahead one of the two it's only it's only two options what about the kia plant i don't think that's in alabama though it's in georgia oh yeah okay i don't know i have no idea logging redstone arsenal oh that's in hansville yes that's what the father-in-law was there. It's all the military stuff. Yeah, it's all the military stuff. It's a big-time military stuff. It's huge.
Starting point is 01:21:10 And it's in Huntsville. Yeah. And I've golfed there. I don't know a lot about it. I was almost in the Army. I joined the Army, and then I got arrested and didn't make it in. You wouldn't have been doing stuff at this place. No, probably not.
Starting point is 01:21:22 Yeah. I don't know what that is. So what did you get arrested for? For alcohol and then wheat. Alcohol first, and then they found wheat. And you do nothing now. Now you're sober, right? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:21:35 You do whatever. I don't drink. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, you can't take all the Alabama out. You know what I mean? Take a little bit out. Yeah, the old timers call it dry. That's what they call it. You know what I mean? Take a little bit out. Yeah, the old timers call it dry.
Starting point is 01:21:47 That's what they call it. You know what I mean? You don't drink, but you may get into something else once in a while. Yeah, you know, what are you going to do? What are you going to do? I got to live a life, don't I? You and I did a show once in Huntsville. I think it was at that hotel that was so terrible.
Starting point is 01:22:00 Oh, yeah. But I feel like we got turned around and we pulled into this redstone it could have been nasa but they stopped their signs you were like what do you think's going on in there that i mean just quickly turn like wow man i want to know what's going on everywhere yeah i want everything i see i'm like what are they up to in there yeah you ever what what's the most normal place that you would want to get uh is there a normal place that you would want to, is there a normal place that you would like, you could pull into Walmart, you're like, what's really happening back behind that?
Starting point is 01:22:28 Yeah. I mean, yeah. I mean, like even a comedy club, I'm like, what's going on in this room back here? Yeah. Why is it locked? Yeah. Which is a great, it's just every locked door. What do they not want us to see?
Starting point is 01:22:41 What's happening? What do they not want us to see in this locked door? Yeah. St. Louis Funny Bone had some weird life. I kept going through doorways and going down these long hallways. You would explore. Yeah. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 01:22:52 So if the red sonars, you would never be scared to know. Well, that's military stuff. I don't want to get locked up in some weird military thing. They're like, what are you up to? And then they search my YouTube history. And I'm like, okay, you know what I'm doing. Well, NASA, there's all kinds of crazy stuff going on there. With Huntsville, they – yeah, I mean, so many people are moving there that it's so many people not from there. I mean, it's getting pretty crazy.
Starting point is 01:23:23 And, yeah, that place could be huge. It's a good place to live, man. Yeah. First rocket that sent humans to the moon was at NASA's Marshall Space Flight Center in Huntsville. Saturn V, was it? I think so. Okay.
Starting point is 01:23:39 Sorry. Do you guys know what Alabama's greatest natural disaster is? I'd say... Besides Aaron's last album? I would say. Besides Aaron's last album. I would say the tornado that. Yeah. Oh, yeah. The tornado that in the last few years probably was pretty bad.
Starting point is 01:23:52 The one that. They hit Beauregard. That hit University of Alabama. Oh, yeah. Well, that's better than this answer, really. Oh, it's the BP oil spill. You guys are giving like good, real answers. This happened 80 million years ago.
Starting point is 01:24:06 Oh, sure it did. Yeah. If we got to make them up, then... Well, it was a meteor that hit, meteorite that hit Elmore County. Called the Wetumka. I've County. Called the Wetumka. Wetumka.
Starting point is 01:24:27 The crater. You guys ever heard of that? No. I didn't know. This town was named after that crater. After that meteor. Just like Alabama River. In Oak Grove, Alabama. You guys know Oak Grove? 1954, Ann Hodges was hit by a meteorite
Starting point is 01:24:43 while napping on her couch. She's the only person confirmed to have been hit by a meteorite while napping on her couch. She's the only person confirmed to have been hit by a meteorite. In the world? Yeah. Did she die? No, she lived. It woke her up. She got hit by a meteorite and lived. She was badly bruised on one side of her body but was able to walk.
Starting point is 01:24:59 Did they find the meteor? Yeah, then they got in a fight about it because her landlord said, that's my meteorite because you're on my property. Yeah. And they got an argument about it, and they finally agreed to buy it. I think there's a lot of property fighting in Alabama. Yeah. There's a lot of like, it's my property.
Starting point is 01:25:14 My property. There's a lot. That's my favorite kind of fighting. My friend almost got cut up by his own uncle for parking in his driveway. Oh, really? They were neighbors. It was a – I'm in my neighbor's driveway right now.
Starting point is 01:25:26 Yeah. Maybe it could go right. He's from New Jersey, then. Can I ask a question to three homeowners? How deep down in the ground do you own, and how high up in the sky do you own when you own a piece of land? There is such a thing as mineral mineral rights where somebody can own underneath. Oh.
Starting point is 01:25:49 Like if they find something in there, somebody else can own it. Like if you buy land, because I just bought some land. If you buy land and somebody has inherited something, they can have mineral rights to your land. Oh, so they deep down. So if you found oil, somebody could pop up and go that's my oil and then they could take it yeah and you think you're rich but really now i just watched there's there will be blood again i think he talks about that like he owns i mean i think he says that he owns the mineral rights because the guys well we own this other land he's like i because i what he
Starting point is 01:26:20 bought he owns the mineral rights to all the other stuff i don't know theoretically you own it all the way to the center of the earth is that how it works and then china it's the other yeah where does that cut off you know what i mean uh i yeah i don't know i would thank you i would just think if you own this land and a meteorite comes in it's like no it's it's in my it's in my era it's like a foul ball and you just don't know who's going to get it, the right filter or the center filter. And at one point, the center filter goes, I got it, and the right filter can come in and call him off because he goes,
Starting point is 01:26:54 it's in my air. Yeah, and there may be, I think in Tennessee, it's illegal to capture rainwater because the government's like, well, we own the rain. That rain is ours. Are you serious? I think so. I don't know for sure.
Starting point is 01:27:05 That sounds like you want to believe it. Yeah, well, I do want to. I don't want it to be true, but I do want to believe it. Well, anyway, she agreed to pay $500 for the rock because they thought they could sell it for a lot more, but by the time it got through all this stuff, nobody
Starting point is 01:27:21 wanted to buy it. So she gave it to the Alabama Museum of Natural History. It sounds like a thing from Joe Dirt. Yeah. So it's in the museum. Well, she gave it to him. I don't know where it is now, but that's where it went. But she's the only person to be hit by it.
Starting point is 01:27:37 I kind of picture it like, did it come through her house? Yeah. And how big was it? The size of a brick? Grapefruit size. Oh. I just don't believe that it comes through the house unless it's a trailer and
Starting point is 01:27:49 doesn't kill her. Yeah. From the sky. Yeah. I mean from the galaxy. It's not you know. Pretty far away. Pretty far away. All down. All down. Where do you think it came from Dusty? Who knows
Starting point is 01:28:05 If it goes through a roof That'll slow it down a little bit Yeah I'm just trying to think Of how that would be possible The atmosphere didn't do enough But As you get some siding
Starting point is 01:28:18 Talk to those roofers That's good work The roofers Yeah I'd use that as a credit We slowed down a meteor We slowed down a meteor We slowed down a meteor Could have killed her
Starting point is 01:28:29 Kept a woman alive And they go That's a Okay What's the I'll take some pricing On that then Alabama along with
Starting point is 01:28:36 Oklahoma and Iowa Have the most EF5 tornadoes Of any state Yeah But Alabama has the most deaths So Okay
Starting point is 01:28:42 Most trailer parks Yeah Probably the reason right probably still getting that ditch probably so yeah yeah yeah y'all had to be prepared were you prepared more than most like you knew what to do well we would just go to my grandmother's house but it was like her house was really not much better than a trailer yeah but we would go there and be like all right we're safe now yeah but it was like, yeah, I mean, we were prepared. But you have that great joke about go lay down in a ditch.
Starting point is 01:29:08 Yeah, I mean, that's what they always say. Yeah, I've heard that. If the tornado comes, you live in a trailer park, they're like, go to a neighbor's house or go outside and lay down in a ditch. That's their way of being like, we don't know what to tell you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And also our neighbor lives in a trailer. Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah yeah you gotta run to those houses that back up yeah and then they know you're coming all right once they hear a
Starting point is 01:29:31 tornado warning they're like uh it's like you see y'all come over the hill just like all the trailer park people trying to come in just let us in your garage get, get back, get back. The 1993 storm of the century, Birmingham reported 13 inches of snow. Wow. Oh, I remember that in 93. We had a little snow. Yeah. Yeah. The storm of the century.
Starting point is 01:29:56 That's what they called it. Yeah. I remember I was on spring break in college and- Good night. His whole life ahead of him. Yeah. I hate that scene. good night his whole life ahead of him yeah aaron was it what were you i was two two years old two years old yeah probably one going on yeah yeah probably one going on too yeah brian and spring break in college sleep by 9 30 what time did you go to bed when you went to the spring break?
Starting point is 01:30:28 I mean, I didn't go anywhere, but we were on spring break. Was this near the worried incident? That was high school, senior year of high school. So that was your storm of the century was when that happened. Yeah. So what was the storm of the century? It came up from the Gulf, and so it was like a storm, a tropical storm, but it dumped so much snow on uh parts of alabama and east tennessee like the smoky mountains got feet of feet of snow yeah
Starting point is 01:30:52 chattanooga got like three feet of snow yeah i was 11 and we built a snowman it was the best time of my life yeah it's the greatest you got the you got the good end of it yeah it's like you we saw it here in nashville recently is these southern towns, they get flack for not, like, driving well in snow. It's not because of us. It's because we're just not prepared for this to happen. Yeah, and the reason – and they always go, you guys can't be – like, why are you all not prepared for this? And they always say that.
Starting point is 01:31:17 You're like, because it doesn't happen enough. It's not enough that we need to get prepared. You know what I mean? Like, this year was so crazy that no one could drive. Nothing's getting plowed. And it's like, yeah, but this was, it was a week. And then the next 10 years, we won't have this. So what are you going to do?
Starting point is 01:31:32 Go bring everything in that just sits waiting for the one week that we had. You know, it's like, it's, it's better just to like, yeah, that week's kind of done. You just, you know, scratch that week. People get mad. Like we're not green bay being like why are you not prepared like you're like because we don't get it dude like we don't we don't get it enough we get we get ice and snow i was you know it's these but you were so would you have been i thought about this the kids that always get out of school you know they i might have talked about
Starting point is 01:32:02 it that week but uh when there's a big snow week and there's always like, and you'd be like, the roads are fine. And they're always like, well, there's some kids that we can't get to in the buses. Yeah. Would that have been where you're at? No, no. Those were up in the woods. Yeah, there was a road. They could have got to us.
Starting point is 01:32:19 But yeah. You were right off the highway. Yeah, we're okay to not do it. Yeah, we had a dirt road, but it was a highway there. I mean, we were, yeah. Because I always wonder where these people, where these kids live. There's always kids that they go, well, we can't get to everybody. You're like, who?
Starting point is 01:32:33 Like, I'm driving. Like, you're like, we're all driving. I mean, you have no snow. And in the South, they're like, well, we can't get everywhere. You're like, is a guy on a mountain? Like one kid that we can't get to? Right, and you could probably just do school without that kid for a day, a couple of days.
Starting point is 01:32:49 I'm sure that kid's fine. That kid would love it. High school here, my dad had to make the call to do a snow day or not. Yeah. So that was always really stressful. I would always get hit up by everybody. Like, you got to talk the old man and the counselor. My dad would wake up at, like, 4 a.m.
Starting point is 01:33:04 and go out and drive every route possible to get to the school. And he'd be like, oh, it's fine. I like the idea that your dad would be waiting for you to, you're a parent. Yeah, like I have any kind of input at all. Like you should really, you know, care at all. Many times. Your friends would text you?
Starting point is 01:33:21 Oh, dude, they were like, you got to. It's unbelievable that you even have a phone. That's so crazy for me to think. In high school, like your friends would text you oh dude they were like you gotta it's unbelievable you even have a phone that's so crazy in high school like your friends would text you and say and you're like i mean that's so you know yeah i didn't have a smartphone back then i was using t9 so it was like the early early stage yeah yeah no it's not it's just funny it's just like it's it's there's times you have moments of feeling old where you're like, God, in high school, your friends would text you? And that's so crazy. How do you think I feel?
Starting point is 01:33:49 Having a good night. Right here, this guy, they sent an owl out. A raven. A raven to see. Asked a raven how the roads are. That's how they knew if they could go to school. Pa, we going to go to school? Auburn's won five college football national championships.
Starting point is 01:34:12 Alabama's won seven. 17. 17, yeah. 17? 18. Oh, Saban's won six or seven. He's won seven now, I think, right? Yeah, 17.
Starting point is 01:34:22 He's won above Bear Bryant, I think, now. Now, there's a bunch that people that aren't Alabama fans claim that they don't actually have. Yeah. So if you ask, Alabama fans will give you a different number than everybody else. Yeah, because there's a reason for that. Why is that?
Starting point is 01:34:36 Because they claim – they didn't have the national championship, I think, back then. Yeah, for so many years, it was just a free-for-all. Teams would be like, we're the national champs. I'm like, okay, you can say that. I mean, I dig it, though. Alabama was like, nah, we have quite a few. We're going to pick that from 1900.
Starting point is 01:34:52 My whole childhood, we had 12, and everyone would be like, you know they only actually have eight. All right, say whatever you want. Yeah, still more than you. Yeah. They've won more bowl games than any other team, played more bowl games than any other school. Yeah, the best.
Starting point is 01:35:06 Yeah, when you cheat, it's easy. Go ahead. Bryant-Denny Stadium, 101,000 people, seventh largest college football stadium in America. Yeah. Talladega Super Speedway, 143,000, 13th largest stadium in the world. Hot track.
Starting point is 01:35:20 What's the number one largest? Somewhere in like South south america i think some like some soccer stadium i've been to talladega yeah it's a good time it's a good time did you watch nascar did y'all y'all loved it yeah the 90s we were into it yeah my family was into it i mean i was a kid i liked i like kyle petty because he drove the mellow yellow car i liked mellow yellow yeah alan kawicki was my mom's favorite race car driver and he drove the hooters car so i was the only kid in the third grade with a T-shirt that said Hooters on the front. Bill Elliott.
Starting point is 01:35:48 More than a mouthful on the back. Yeah. I mean, Bill Elliott. We're doing an episode on NASCAR. I would like it. Because Bill Elliott, his son races now. Yeah, Chase Elliott. Chase Elliott.
Starting point is 01:36:01 And he's very good. Yeah. And I don't know NASCAR all in enough, but I do like NASCAR, and I've been to some races. I've been to Talladega and Daytona with Burr, Bill Burr. Me and him went, and they – it's – Bill Elliott, the fun fact about him was he once lapped the entire field. That's how – his car was going over 200 miles an hour.
Starting point is 01:36:23 This is when they finally, like, slowed him down because they were going too fast. And he lapped everybody. Wow. That's unreal. How do you ever get so far ahead that you lap the entire field? Yeah, they had a name for Bill Elliott. I forget, like a nickname, something. Not Whispering.
Starting point is 01:36:41 Whispering Bill Anderson. I went to actually high school with his son. Can you guess what country the biggest stadium in the world is in? Did you see it? I don't know. I don't know if I saw it or not, but I wouldn't know. I'm afraid to name something because country is going to be. I'm not going to name a country.
Starting point is 01:37:00 I know. Texas? I think it's going to be worse than that. I'm like, Oklahoma City. Go ahead. North Korea. North Korea. North Korea has a stadium with 150,000 people.
Starting point is 01:37:12 So we don't, yeah, we don't even really know if that's true. Yeah, they tell us that's what it is. Wow. Michigan Stadium, third. What do they do with that field in North Korea? According to this Wikipedia entry. I don't think you want to know what they do there. Look at that.
Starting point is 01:37:25 See, that doesn't even have Talladega on there. Wow, Penn State, Ohio State, Texas A&M, Indian National Cricket Team. Man, cricket is – I do not understand cricket at all. I don't understand it either. I would like to because so many people are watching it that I would like to where you want to go like i want to know what you hit with a paddle yeah but they throw it and it bounces and then they hit with a paddle into a field kind of like baseball is it well i think baseball derived it's a lot like baseball yeah yeah but i mean people like the guys are the best players it's so big i I like to be able to just know what's going on.
Starting point is 01:38:07 Yeah. I would like to know who's the best. Anytime I know a sport that I don't know, I want to go, well, who's- Who's their LeBron right now? Michael Jordan. Well, that's where, like with hockey, Wayne Gretzky. That's why it's so fascinating, Wayne Gretzky, how good he is. Because I know everybody talks about Wayne Gretzky, but hockey, especially here, is not the most talked about thing.
Starting point is 01:38:27 But Wayne Gretzky is, I mean, more dominant than Jordan. I mean, the records he's broke. I mean, they're impossible to catch. He's the only one that they – LeBron's probably going to be the all-time scorer. He can probably beat it. No one thought that record could ever get broken to be the all-time scorer.
Starting point is 01:38:44 It's so far ahead. And LeBron's got a real shot beat it. No one thought that record could ever get broken to be the all-time score. It's so far ahead. And LeBron's got a real shot at it. I mean, no one's – Wayne Gretzky's records are – I mean, it's not even – dude, no one can – have you looked – it's like two times. If he wouldn't have played or something, like he – or would have left – He would have taken some years off. Years off, he would be so far ahead. We talked about it in the sports. Either – I can't remember if it was all of his assists you take away
Starting point is 01:39:06 or all his goals. He would still be the leading scorer. Yeah. Wow. Crazy. And like people that have no idea what hockey is know Wayne Gretzky. Yeah. I mean, that's me.
Starting point is 01:39:15 I don't – I mean, growing up, I was like, I know Wayne Gretzky. Yeah. But no – He's on the Wheaties box. Just transcends the sport for sure. Yeah. Some athletes have come from Alabama. Hank Aaron. Hey. Oh, have come from Alabama. Hank Aaron.
Starting point is 01:39:26 Hey. Oh, yeah. My namesake. Is it? I don't know. Yeah. Bobby and Davey Allison. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 01:39:33 Charles Barkley. Yeah. Bo Jackson. Terrell Owens. Willie Mays. That's the boxer that just came. The guy that's currently. The big heavyweight fighter.
Starting point is 01:39:43 Tyson Fury. Yeah. Is it Fury or? He won. Joe Namath. I don't know if he's from alabama yeah yeah yeah no tyson furious who won right yeah he beat uh deontay wilder yeah yeah wow yeah deontay wilder's from Alabama. His dad's school. He's now the head coach at St. Michael Catholic High School in Fairhope, Alabama. Oh, that's the school you went to?
Starting point is 01:40:12 That's my dad's. My dad started the school. Yeah. And this year, Phillip Rivers is now the head football coach. Your dad is his boss right now. Yeah, technically. Technically, I guess.
Starting point is 01:40:22 Yeah. That's pretty cool. Yeah. I'm doing a show there this weekend. I think he's going to be there. All right. We'll have time for that. I guess. That's pretty cool. Yeah. I'm doing a show there this weekend. I think he's going to be there. He'll be cool with me. All right, we'll have time for that. All right, that's fun.
Starting point is 01:40:30 You hoped to meet him before the show. Yeah. That's actually good advice. Let's see here. The Auburn-Opalaca area was named by Golf Digest as the number one area for golf in the United States. All right. That's where I'm from. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:40:48 I've always heard that. It's funny because I haven't really been down there to play, but yeah, they are unbelievable. Robert Tran Jones. Yeah. Golf courses are on them. The Grand National is their big one. Yeah. There's a lot of tournaments there.
Starting point is 01:40:59 Mm-hmm. Victory Land. You guys know Victory Land? Oh, yeah. Yeah, I've been there a couple of times. There's no gamble. You're not allowed to gamble alabama there's no lottery but there's a there but victory land somehow exists in shorter alabama the dog track been there a couple of times there's a guy a couple of stories about this guy named butch he just kind of hangs out there
Starting point is 01:41:19 bad teeth mustache suspenders and he just he's just hanging around and when new people come he helps them pick horses or dogs and then you know when they win he wants his cut and you know 10 but apparently he lives at a hotel i met this guy one time and then i thought that that was just a random occurrence and then another friend was telling me about the same guy. Wow. And it's a sad place. Yeah, he makes a living off just, he never bets. Yeah. He just goes, look, I'll tell you. He may bet, but he lives in a hotel apparently right there and he just hangs out there all day.
Starting point is 01:41:55 The first time I went, I had Vegas in mind of this like, you know, like horse racing. And I thought this is going to be great. And it is just a sad bunch of people in victory land. Yeah. It does not feel much like victory in there. And then there was a casino with slot machines, and then it got shut down. But it wasn't like they were hiding it.
Starting point is 01:42:14 There were billboards on the highway, like, I won big at Victory Land. I remember that. I did a Comedy Zone gig in Alabama at a bingo hall, and it did not go well. But I thought they were pretty good. zone gig in Alabama at a bingo hall and it did not go well. I was with,
Starting point is 01:42:32 I was with Muttsy and he flashed a flashlight at everybody in the audience. You guys know Muttsy? No. Yeah, I do. It's well, the hard, yeah,
Starting point is 01:42:38 it's tough to perform for an audience younger than you. It's, I do know Muttsy. I did a show with him. Is it the bald head? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He's very funny, but he does all crowd work. Yeah. Yeah. I did. My cruise ship was with Muttsy. I did a show with him. Is it the bald head from New Orleans? Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's very funny, but he does all crowd work.
Starting point is 01:42:47 Yeah. I did my cruise ship was with Muttsy. And he was – I don't know if I ever told about that. Yeah, you told it. Yeah. And he would flash his light. I just remember I did a joke on – I mean, I bombed. And I said, my favorite team is Tennessee Titans.
Starting point is 01:43:03 And they go, boo. And one lady goes, roll tide. And I could not make them understand we're not competitors. I just couldn't. They weren't buying it. I'm like, we have Derrick Henry. We have a player from Alabama. Roll tide.
Starting point is 01:43:18 That's so funny, man. All right. They were booing the whole professional sport. The idea. The idea of it. Yeah. That's every gig story for Brian, by the way. All right. They were booing the whole professional sport. The idea of it. Yeah. That's every gig story for Bri by the way. I feel like they all start that way.
Starting point is 01:43:31 I did this show. It did not go well. Yeah. You get yelled roll tight at more than most people do just for some reason. In Utah. Yeah. Roll tight. Huntsville did not go well for us either.
Starting point is 01:43:45 That show, we were like doing lunch break for people, and then as the lunch break ended, I was up doing comedy, and people were like leaving. The whole place was empty. I saw a video of this show. Yeah, I posted it. It was for hotel workers. You think of all people, but we did it on their lunch break,
Starting point is 01:44:02 so they're going through line, just getting their food. Through a buffet. Buffet while we're doing it. And then Dusty thought, I'll get them. Yeah, Brian was up there not doing well. And I thought, well, I'll get it. No, and I did not. And they left.
Starting point is 01:44:13 Dusty refused to leave. I mean, they're vacuuming now, just cleaning the room. And Dusty's still going. And finally the CEO said, we got to stop. I mean, we got to. Did they, they stopped it? Yeah, he was like, you go. Yeah, he said you could stop. I mean, we got to- Did they? They stopped it?
Starting point is 01:44:26 Yeah, he was like, you can go. Yeah, he said, you can stop. I mean, everybody was gone, but at that point, I'm like, nah, I'm just- Like everybody's gone. In fact, how many people
Starting point is 01:44:32 were really there? It was only the workers and the guy paying us. Just people cleaning up at that point. So 10 people. Yeah, they were like clinking dishes
Starting point is 01:44:41 and stuff like that. Oh, like literally the staff. So anybody that would be watching the show was completely gone. Oh, yes. Yeah.. So anybody that would be watching the show is completely gone. Oh, yes. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:44:47 And the CEO. At that point, it was just a point of pride for me. How much time did you do? I was supposed to do 30. I probably did 25. Yeah. Man. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:44:56 Sometimes the shows that are the worst are the ones you do the most time at. Yeah. For some reason, you end up being- I'm punishing them at that point. Yeah. If you're not enjoying it, I punish you by going longer. Remember that bowling alley show we did? Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 01:45:09 What was it? In Michigan? Muskegon? Muskegon, Michigan. At the back of a bowling alley, there's no mic. The mic didn't work. It was like- There are no lights in the room, so it was like pitch black darkness.
Starting point is 01:45:24 Yeah. There was a fake brick wall behind you like a plastic sign that looked like bricks held up by some pcp pie i can't remember i've told my pvc bowling bowling alley story they ever told my opening for jay uh i don't think so so it was in michigan too we performed it was the bowling alley was had like, so when you did the show, they had to build the stage. And so you're performing bowling alleys are behind you. Now they're all dark, but down, they still let bowling happening.
Starting point is 01:45:55 So the whole show is you're hearing bowling. Yeah. And so I'm opening for Big J and then I'm on to, they just put the stage up, they put the lights up and all this. And so I'm doing the thing and the the crowd's, like, sitting there. And, you know, you're sitting – and the crowd's, like, sitting in, like, seats. Like, they had, like, actually kind of stadium seating because I think they do, like, bowling competitions there.
Starting point is 01:46:15 And so they had kind of stadium seating and then tables. But the stadium seating was empty. No one's there. Everybody's just kind of down at the tables. And, I mean, it's a lot of room. I mean, it's basically your – a whole bowling alley is kind of shut down for you except at the end. And so when I'm up there, the spotlight goes out. So I'm just in the dark. Whole set, I'm just in the dark. And so I'm like, you know, talking, I'm like, oh, I'm making jokes about the guy
Starting point is 01:46:39 comes over, brings the ladder, climbs up with the ladder, fixes the spotlight, comes back down the ladder. Everybody claps. They go, all right, do it again, blah, blah. And then within three minutes, the light goes out again. And I'm like, ah, I got to fix it again. There he goes. All right. And he goes to get the ladder that he put back.
Starting point is 01:46:57 The ladder's at the other end of the boy. He put it back. All the way back. All the way back. And it's like 10 minutes for him to come back with a ladder. And there's a ton of room that you want to go, just leave the ladder. That guy's confident in his work. He was confident because this light will never go out.
Starting point is 01:47:13 And I remember he just left. I was like, why would you not? And it just, that ladder hits. Like just all he's up there having to fix it. That's my bowling list. I love that there's just a couple of lanes open. They're like, yeah, we're doing a show, but we need a little bowling here.
Starting point is 01:47:29 We need a little. This is a bowling alley. Just enough to distract the show. Yeah. Alabama Splash Adventure, previously known as Visionland. You guys ever been there? Where was that?
Starting point is 01:47:40 Auburn. This is a water park and amusement park located off I-20, 59 in Bessemer, Alabama. Oh, no, I've never been. Oh, this is what I was talking about earlier. Vision Land. Vision Land. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:47:50 Now it's called Alabama Splash Land. I forgot that Victory Land was a – okay. Vision Land is a theme park that I've been to. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. There was a pool place called Auburn Splash where you go buy pool products. And I remember that guy had a pretty good joke one time.
Starting point is 01:48:02 I was in there with my dad, and he was like, people call me all me all the time go how much does it cost to get in he's like nothing to get in only when you leave with stuff right we laughed it was a good time he's so proud of it yeah yeah uh river chase galleria in hoover i think we've all been there on a stardome run uh 43rd largest mall in the US yeah how many I feel like after like 30 you can just stop
Starting point is 01:48:28 counting those you know 43rd alright there's like a sign there he might be able to do after 10 yeah
Starting point is 01:48:35 after the top 10 malls would be enough there you go that's enough if you're like 11 if you're 11 you want to now if I'm the 11th mall
Starting point is 01:48:43 I'm going to be like well I think we should still do I understand it yeah definitely not past 20 43rd you're 11. You want to. Now, if I'm in the 11th mall, I'm going to be like, well, I think we should still do it. I understand it. Yeah. Definitely not past 20. 40, 30. You're like, dude, we're big. 25.
Starting point is 01:48:50 Is that good enough? We're big. Yeah. 25. Top 25. Yeah. Biggest mall. But I mean, really 10 to me is.
Starting point is 01:48:57 Yeah. If you get to 43, you're kind of like, actually, how many malls are there? Yeah. Yes. Yeah. Do you guys know what the top tourist attraction is in alabama oh good guess dentist uh i don't know if that makes sense uh that joke that people tour and people travel down because they want to just see how are they letting people out like what about like this
Starting point is 01:49:21 dolphin island i was gonna say gulf gulf shores uh well tourist attraction i guess oh oh the ocean What about Dolphin Island? I was going to say Gulf Shores. Well, tourist attraction, I guess. Oh. The ocean. The Peach and Clanton. No, not Clanton. The U.S. Space and Rocket Center in Huntsville. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:49:33 Oh. That makes sense. That's not really. That doesn't feel like a tourist attraction so much. Yeah. It is, though. I guess so. Yeah. Did you go to space camp as a kid?
Starting point is 01:49:41 Oh, no. Yeah. My parents knew what I was all about. I went to space camp. Yeah. oh no yeah my parents knew what i went i went to space camp yeah we did like two nights through our school yeah what's going on my dad does that my dad told me a long time ago he's like i i try to get him to watch like star trek and stuff he's like i don't i don't like space stuff like i don't do stuff with space yeah so i get it yeah i don't either now i don't get it i don't like it either yeah i'll do a little guardians of the galaxy here but i don't believe what's happening yeah
Starting point is 01:50:07 you don't take it to heart you know watch it you go you're in space you don't think that raccoon is really talking you are you are yeah you say they're in gardens and galaxies you just saying like you know this ain't true and someone's like what? You're like, that would sound worse than someone that didn't believe it's true. I watched a documentary. Yeah, you know that's not true. You know who's protecting us out there. Yeah, it ain't that record. You're like, I don't, yeah, you believe in this, man?
Starting point is 01:50:40 Some famous people from Alabama, Courtney Cox. Oh. Channing Tatum. Yeah, I knew that.. Yeah, I knew that. Helen Keller. I knew that. She's on the quarter. She's on the state quarter.
Starting point is 01:50:50 You have your own quarter. Every state has a quarter, Nate. You remember that? You don't use the universal quarter. I'm not saying we have our own currency. People take it. How much is it in American money when y'all use your own quarter that y'all have that you walk in and try to pass? Is it like Canadian change at a laundromat that they go, I know what this is?
Starting point is 01:51:12 You just get a hell of a gallon quarter every now and then. It's a little bigger. It doesn't matter. We'll test you on this one, Nate. The most successful band in country music is from the state of Alabama. Lynyrd Skynyrd. Country band. Alabama is from – are they Alabama?
Starting point is 01:51:32 Of all time or right now? Of all time. It's Alabama? Yeah, it's Alabama. Oh, yeah, for sure. They're the best. Dusty did a show with Alabama. I'll be honest with you.
Starting point is 01:51:40 Aaron Lane, I think, just copies what we say, and you say it right after. That's what – the bull in the ring was you and then you just say you read the bull in the ring again and when i said describe bull ring then you describe bull ring and i just guessed alabama and you were guessing again you go uh you go is this country you asked after i said alabama you didn't go is it country i've been like he's just aaron lane is you're acting like you answer the question very confidently it didn't it was a lot of it was a lot of go back and forth i feel like i tried to speed it up i think aaron i think yeah aaron lane dusty did a show with alabama where at uh iowa cedar rapids iowa oh nice yeah with the band though huh yeah with the with two of the
Starting point is 01:52:25 members one of the guys is not doing well but uh but yeah two of them yeah i think so yeah but it was great i mean i went out in the audience to watch and then a lady was like hey you ever yeah you know how to milk cows and i was like no and she's like she was shocked she was like do you want to and then she was like trying to get me to come over to her house. She was like, my husband's getting real drunk tonight. I need help milking the cows. I was like, I'm not sure what you're talking about. I don't think that.
Starting point is 01:52:52 There's no cows there. There's no cows there. Yeah. I don't think, yeah. The world's largest office chair is. I think she doesn't think too highly of herself. Yeah. You're looking up the world's largest office chair? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:53:05 In Anniston, Alabama. Oh, yeah. Yeah. You know this chair? No, but I know Anniston. Yeah, that's Dusty's car. That's his garage. They would park under it for the tornado.
Starting point is 01:53:16 They'd go, get under the chair, everybody. I like that the ad is another chair, though. They're like, you looking for a chair? Are you looking for a big chair? Paul Bunyan, the only person I could ever see that. What makes that an office chair? That looks like patio. Like a waiting room chair.
Starting point is 01:53:37 Yeah. That's what office chairs look like back in my day. Yeah. No wheels. Well, if they had wheels, they would never really get it back. You know? Yeah, that's true.
Starting point is 01:53:47 Just kill somebody down. It would be at a trailer park. It would be over a trailer. Drag it over. Yeah. Oh, that's funny. Here's a stat for you,
Starting point is 01:53:58 Nate. 43% of all snails in the US live in Alabama. Wow. Really? Yeah. It does move a little slower down there yeah yeah that's a lot of snails down there uh we've talked about this too many because of the ocean i feel like i don't probably i feel like that makes it sound like you'd run into them all the
Starting point is 01:54:18 time i don't remember there being a snail i used to see a lot of slugs yeah oh yeah yeah are we counting slugs you think maybe I thought they were the same. Yeah. Slug just kind of feels like a snail without a shell. Yeah, he just hadn't found one yet. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 01:54:30 He will. He'll get there. It'll take a while. It'll take a while. Yeah, we used to, because you could put salt on slugs and kill them. And I used to go out there
Starting point is 01:54:38 all the time and put all this salt on them. Yeah. And kill them all. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know why I was doing it. You know, I was a kid. Until you got into the weed business. Yeah. The weed killing all. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know why I was doing it.
Starting point is 01:54:45 You know, I was a kid. So you got into the weed business. Yeah. The weed killing business. Yeah, they recruited me. Yeah. They be heard. This guy's the best.
Starting point is 01:54:54 You were going to kill things? You're like, well, not live, not the same as animals. Right. You ever been to the Unclean Baggage Center in Scottsboro? No, I have heard about it, though. I've heard about it, too. We've talked about it on here before. Yeah. They had all kinds of like,
Starting point is 01:55:06 they had a rattlesnake, we learned, and all kinds of stuff they found there. ARAB Alabama was originally ARAD Alabama. It was supposed to be named after the founder's son, but they misspelled it. Wow. On the water tower, right? Well, that's according to Henry Cho's joke.
Starting point is 01:55:21 I couldn't find that. Okay. This just says they misspelled it at the U.S. Postal Service, so they just kept it A-Rab. A-Rab. When they filed the paperwork to incorporate the town, they just spelled it wrong. That's another, like, my Vietnamese, like the A-Rab Alabama,
Starting point is 01:55:38 where they go, where are you from? I go from A-Rab Alabama. You're like, okay, man. Yeah. That's enough. All right. That's rude, and you're just like, what? That's what that's enough all right that's that's rude and you're just like what that's what it is like you know that's what it sounds like yeah but what
Starting point is 01:55:50 about the people in the town that knew it as a rat and they were like well yeah I don't know when that was they're like I'm from a rat and they're like well that doesn't exist yeah I don't know I kind of took it was just a group of people kind of started living here was like we should call this a town and then the guy's like well my son's name a rad and they were like cool let's call it a rad a rad town and then they changed it a rad town a rad town a rad town yeah and now it's not now it's a rab yeah um this is a callback from last week jesse james you remember jesse james yeah last week Jesse James You guys remember Jesse James? Yeah Last week we did Outlaws
Starting point is 01:56:27 And I had all these cool facts Oh Jesse Not the tattoo artist No I was like You guys know Doc Holliday was really a dentist And they were like
Starting point is 01:56:35 Who's Doc Holliday? Oh man I knew Doc Not we I knew Doc Holliday Alright well Don't throw me in He never heard of him
Starting point is 01:56:43 You didn't know Doc Holliday? Never heard the name Wow You don't know Doc Holliday? You never heard the name. Wow. You don't know the I'm Your Huckleberry? That whole thing? No, we went over it. Yeah, we didn't watch the movie. Oh, okay.
Starting point is 01:56:52 I didn't watch the movie either, but I've heard his name. He's never heard of even Doc Holliday. Wow. I'll be your Huckleberry. That's what they always said. Huckleberry Finn. I don't know why we thought that was so cool that he would say that, but I did it. It does sound cool.
Starting point is 01:57:04 I don't know what it means, but it sounds cool. Well, anyway, Jesse James was hiding out in Nashville, which I think we mentioned last week. He went down to Alabama, Killin, Alabama, near Florence, and did his last robbery at the Blue Water Camp because they knew the guy who was collecting the paychecks was going to be there, or the money. He robbed him for $5,200. And then he came back to Nashville to hide out. But one of his crew stopped at a saloon on White's Creek Pike, which we know White's Creek Pike. It's not the best saloons there. And got into a fight and got arrested.
Starting point is 01:57:36 And then he had all this money on him. So then they're like, Jesse James gang probably won. And Jesse James had to leave Nashville because of it. It was his last robbery of it. Wow. It was his last robbery, though. Yeah. What year was that?
Starting point is 01:57:51 Let's just say 1874. Okay. You know, Opelika is a railroad town. And they said that it was so bad back in the day that when the train would come through, they would instruct people to duck down in the plane because people in downtown Opelika would shoot at the train. Wow. Like old kind of Wild West days. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:58:10 Like they just didn't like the train. Yeah. Or they were just drunk and they had nothing going on. Yeah. And that seems like that's still going on in a lot of ways. Do you have the 5,200? How much that is? Yeah. The relative income worth.
Starting point is 01:58:24 Like what is that worth now yeah yeah you want to guess uh fifty thousand dollars yeah ninety one thousand yeah yeah that's uh you know when uh like in a like a truck goes like you know like a truck gets loose on an interstate and they have to go up that ramp that slows them down. That's where I feel like we're at with this podcast. We are basically almost stopped. I'll be honest with you.
Starting point is 01:58:55 It feels, we were a truck rolling and we're not hitting the ramp. We're almost, the truck drivers are already taking a sigh of relief. That's how much this. Well, that's how I feel about every podcast I do. Yeah. I do my own, and every time I'm like, what have I been talking about? Yeah, I don't know. Well, we're at two hours.
Starting point is 01:59:12 I'll wrap this up. Alabama has three comedy clubs, regular comedy clubs. Stardome, Carlos Menci is there this weekend. Stand Up Live in Huntsville. I'll be in. Nate Barganci is there this weekend. Yes. Yep.
Starting point is 01:59:25 Yep. He just found outatze's there this weekend. Yes. Yep. Yep. He just found out. I am there this weekend. And Crown Comedy Club in Auburn, which Dusty Slay's at this weekend. Boom. Wow.
Starting point is 01:59:31 All right. We're crushing Alabama right now. Yeah. And I'm at Hoover. I'm at Hoover the next weekend. In Stardome? Yep. Nice.
Starting point is 01:59:38 And we did, I don't know if I have to, but I did a ranking of the Nashville, top Nashville comedians because we've had a lot of people move here. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:59:46 And I did it by age. This is your own? This is your ranking? Well, I think it's pretty. So rankings in, how's it ranked? By age, by decades. Stop for a second because I got to pull it back up. Well, I wish I'd have brought it up now.
Starting point is 01:59:59 Yeah. I'm sorry. I'm anxious to hear it. I think people are allowed to take a break. All right. Well, then I'll say today is. No, I think I'm saying people are like, think people are allowed to take a break alright well then I'll say today is no I think
Starting point is 02:00:05 I'm saying people are like this whole podcast has been a break I think they're having a great time no I'm joking they're having fun I will mention then
Starting point is 02:00:13 that today we're doing this on Sunday's National Pi Day oh how about that 3.14 etc etc
Starting point is 02:00:19 etc etc yeah tomorrow is the Ides of March yeah which is when Julius Caesar was murdered
Starting point is 02:00:24 wow and the day this podcast comes out St. Patrick of March Which is when Julius Caesar was murdered And the day this podcast comes out St. Patrick's Day Which is when St. Nick brought toys To all the good kids in Ireland Wow Remember when he got that mixed up? That's a good time
Starting point is 02:00:38 I probably should have stalled on that No that was a terrific stall Because now look at this I'm just a couple clicks away all right so this is this is pretty authentic i think top comedians by age dusty all right up on the screen there too okay okay yeah jeff allen we all know him yeah a veteran comic for some time all right is it any you're gonna say the ages because people are watching people yeah so in the 60s jeff allen if your age is in your 60s okay which we assume he's in his 60s, Jeff Allen. If your age is in your 60s. Okay. Which we assume he's in his 60s.
Starting point is 02:01:05 We don't know. I think that's, yeah. Yeah. I think that's accurate. I think it's a good guess. Could be insulting either way. 50s, Kathleen Madigan. Yep.
Starting point is 02:01:15 Okay. Yep. We don't see Kathleen much, but she's been in Nashville probably about five years, I guess. Yeah. Yeah. This is a minimum. You got to live here a minimum of two years.
Starting point is 02:01:21 Yeah. So all these newcomers don't count. Okay. Okay. 40s, Brian Bates, obviously. Obviously. He's great. Obviously.
Starting point is 02:01:28 Barely hanging in there. Moments away. I'll bump Kathleen. Yeah. It just rolls on up. I wanted Henry Cho in the 50s, but Aaron said we needed some diversity. I'm like, Henry's Asian. What else do you need?
Starting point is 02:01:42 He's from A-Rab. I was not involved in this at all. Just let that be known 30's Dusty Slade alright okay I'll agree with that 20's Aaron Webber okay
Starting point is 02:01:50 I'll be gone pretty soon yep well then you and Dusty can find it and then the 10's Nate's nephew Caleb how old's Caleb what is he
Starting point is 02:01:59 12, 13 13 now he may hold this for a while he's done Zanies once, twice he's in Zanies twice, my nephew Caleb. Very funny. Him and they wrote jokes, and he did very good.
Starting point is 02:02:11 The first set, he went up and did. I was doing the headline Zanies. My dad was opening, and then he brought Caleb up, and Caleb went up and destroyed. Yeah. Destroyed. And did very good and brought me up. And he's just so confident. And then the next, like my brother teaches at, he goes to school my brother's at.
Starting point is 02:02:32 And they teach us. My brother's like, well, we're doing a, you know, what is it? Talent show. Yeah. Like at school. He's like, you should do your standup. And Caleb goes, I don't know. You know, I mean, he's like, they're just not going to get my stuff.
Starting point is 02:02:46 He already was turning. He's done one gig, and he's already going like, come on. I'm not. I perform at comedy clubs. He threw me that gig. He's like, I got this gig. I don't want it. That was very zany.
Starting point is 02:02:57 He's paid him. We wrote him a check from Zany's, and he got paid. And I mean, really worked hard at it. Him and my sister really helped, and they did really good. I think it's a good move not to do stand-up at the school, though. Is it solid? Yeah, I wouldn't want to do stand-up at my own school. Well, that's what he said.
Starting point is 02:03:15 He goes, I'm not going to, you know, he's above it. I mean, college, I did accommodate a college way back before I was ready for it, and I had a joke where I go, I had this girl come over to my apartment the other night and this guy goes no you didn't pretty good yeah that's good alright so that's it was that it
Starting point is 02:03:39 yeah I think that's it we did it alright everybody this week oh we could do pound oh my god Yeah, I think that's it. That was it. We did it. All right, everybody. This week, we're going to do Pound. Oh, my God. What are you doing? This is like your awkward coming out. Are you going through puberty on the podcast?
Starting point is 02:03:57 You just started just pounding Dusty on camera. Oh, man. Isn't that crazy to do? Just, hey, the episode's ending. Thanks for coming by. We're friends. You know? Yeah, you say it afterwards as you walk out. It's not an insane thing to do. I think it's, you know're friends you know you say it afterwards i think it's you know yeah afterwards you say it how are you gonna sign off because i was gonna just say
Starting point is 02:04:12 goodbye like normal i'm not gonna get up and pound everybody i figured while you were doing that the camera would be on you i figured i could that was a genuine moment that wasn't for the camera an erin land camera would have had it. That's how we end every show on Aaron Land. Well, yeah. There you go. Oh, never mind. He's never, he doesn't know that move.
Starting point is 02:04:36 He doesn't. We do a handshake. So, yeah. This week, folks, The Greatest Savage American Netflix please watch it please tell everybody that you can
Starting point is 02:04:49 as always Dusty Slay check him out all his dates that he's got coming up his website very very funny he's got a good
Starting point is 02:04:56 very funny podcast very funny podcast what's your podcast called? we're having a good time podcast we're having a good time podcast so make sure you check that out yeah you have dates
Starting point is 02:05:04 more dates or. I'll be at the grand old Opry pretty soon. All right. Yeah. Grand old Opry. That's good. You know, you'd be.
Starting point is 02:05:13 Are you going to mention the podcast we're doing? Yeah. So yes, I should have probably opened with this. We can talk about it more. We're mentioning more next week, but we are doing a live Nate land podcast at Zany's. When is it?
Starting point is 02:05:30 April 15th, April 15th, Thursday night, Thursday night. Tickets are on sale now. So go get your tickets. Yeah. If you've made it,
Starting point is 02:05:38 this is a little, you know, you're getting the first shot. If you had that, this is for the, this is the deep cuts for the real fans that made it to the end. Yeah, we've already fist bumped. I mean, yeah.
Starting point is 02:05:48 They go, a bunch of people turned off right when he said that. That's how they know it's over. They go, once Aaron gives the signal, he gives a fist bump. I'm going to ask all the other guests, did you fist bump anybody else? That's not an insane thing to do man i mean he didn't respond to it that's why he was surprised but he was looking at you he was being a good guest i don't think it's insane to do it i think you do it after the show but you understand i wasn't doing it for the camera it was just kind of a personal i just happened to
Starting point is 02:06:20 catch it in the way i caught it was like, nailed it, bro. I mean, it wasn't my best ever Nux. Yeah. Yeah. April 15th, if you want to experience this live at Zany's. I don't know what exactly we're going to be doing. I think we have some ideas, though. I think we're going to take some live comments.
Starting point is 02:06:42 So it will probably be a comment-heavy show. And honestly, I think we're going to some live comments so it will probably be a comment heavy show uh and i honestly i think we're gonna do some stand-up too so uh if you want to come check it out each of us do like you know just a few minutes nothing crazy but just a little some sets and then do a recorded little podcast and we'll make sure to put the podcast out so you guys can hear it that are not in nashville but uh april, Zany's. Go check it out. And yeah. All right. Do you want to mention that you're giving up soda? Oh.
Starting point is 02:07:12 So, God, this is a lot of stuff. This is a real good decoy. Yeah, this is a long one. That Nux was premature, man. I'm sorry. Premature. Premature. How do you say mature? Mature?
Starting point is 02:07:23 Well, you just missed yeah you let him i don't think i don't think we needed to i don't say premature yeah brian does yeah you say premature i used to i don't anymore there's a lot of things i don't do anymore used to be a doctor in a barn and that's uh that's how very funny job to have this is for the Patreon people at home no we don't have Patreon so yeah so I did I'm glad I told you
Starting point is 02:07:57 because I would have said it I would have got away with it but I want to quit drinking Cokes soda would you always say Coke growing up oh yeah Coke everything's a Coke and then you go from there Uh, but, uh, I, I want to quit drinking Cokes soda. Yeah. Which do you, would you always say Coke growing up? Oh yeah. Everything's a Coke.
Starting point is 02:08:09 And then you go from there. Yeah. I'd be like, you want a Coke? And you go, yeah. And you'd be like, are we at Sprite? Yeah. Like that's what, yeah. For sure.
Starting point is 02:08:16 Yeah. So, uh, that's how I did it. But I want to, I need to be drinking. Uh, I want to lose weight. And I think soda is a big problem for me. I drink a lot of it. Uh, I think I drink, I'll have at least, if I'm not going out to eat, I'll have two, probably two to three, at least two.
Starting point is 02:08:32 Diet Pepsi? Diet Pepsi. A little bottle, though. Yeah. 10-ounce, 12-ounce bottle, something like that. At least two, three. If I go to a restaurant, I'm going to have four because they go more and they keep bringing them out. And I kind of forget that.
Starting point is 02:08:48 In my head, that counts as one, but I'm having four. But there's ice in there, though. There's ice in there. So it's less. Yeah. That's how they get you. Yeah. So I was like, you know what?
Starting point is 02:09:00 I want to quit drinking Cokes and soda products. So I was like, you know what? I'm going to say it it on the podcast and uh i'm gonna stop the day my special comes out so i won't have any soda that day uh and start that just start that day just one day march 18th you can do it buddy that's the very greatest average american thing to do one day how many cokes have you had today uh i've had uh i've had one at mcdonald's today laura's gone so yeah boy uh and they uh so i've had one and i'll have one more when i eat i might have two to three more it depends on how much i eat uh but that or one to two more will be the most. But I do it every day.
Starting point is 02:09:46 Yeah. And I think diet, I think, even though it's diet, I drink diet Pepsi. Diet's the worst. I think diet, I think it leads me to other bad,
Starting point is 02:09:54 it makes me want other bad stuff. Like, you won't go eat McDonald's if you're not, can't have Diet Coke. I won't. I just can't imagine
Starting point is 02:10:03 eating a Big Mac and drinking it with water. I don't think I'd want popcorn. I don't think did just none of this stuff pizza's a little like you want coke with pizza like all these kind of things that i eat that are bad all i always want a diet drink to do it with yeah and so i to me i'm just trying to pick like i need to lose some weight i need like i'm working out i just like you nothing, the top part of something's not going down. And so I was like, you know what? I think if I just targeted, it's not good for you anyway to drink all that.
Starting point is 02:10:33 If I targeted Cokes and I was like, let's just start there. And then we can see, maybe that's a problem. So March 18th, I am starting to the day that my special comes out. I will not drink soda. You know, they say now who knows, right? I'm no, I'm no barn doctor,
Starting point is 02:10:47 but the, they say diet, diet Coke keeps you from losing weight. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. There's something in there that doesn't, doesn't let you lose weight.
Starting point is 02:10:57 Yeah. I don't know if that's true. Sugar. But yeah, it's like aspartame. There's some weird stuff. But they started getting rid of aspartame, but it's,
Starting point is 02:11:04 it gives you the taste, the cravings to want other things that are sugar. And so I don't know if it's the problem, but that's the one consistent thing that I was like, if I can just drink water, I could tend to eat healthier things because salad is okay with water. Yeah. I don't know. I have no idea. I might be completely wrong with it. No, I get that. It's tough to have a salad and a Coke. Yeah. That doesn't seem right. I do it. you know salad is okay with water yeah and like or so i don't i don't know i have no idea i might be completely wrong with no i get tough to have a salad and a coke yeah that doesn't seem right i
Starting point is 02:11:29 do it but it's uh i mean i still do it yeah and i could drink a soda i would drink diet coke if i was working out as my liquid i would be fine with that i i'm a big fan uh so uh yeah so i i feel on my special so i was just saying y'all didn't i didn't even really say anything y'all because i don't want to throw it on you that you're like you got to quit something too but uh you just quit you've already quit some stuff right you don't want to tell yeah yeah that don't say it if you because i mean everybody knows okay and so we'll talk about it off camera yeah yeah so when you i'm afraid to do anything during the show now, so I won't wait until after and then we'll talk about it. Yeah.
Starting point is 02:12:06 Well, the crew's already leaving. Fist bump. The crew's already leaving. Tristan's already put his chair away. He's like, I got to go. Yeah. Well, I'm saying you don't want to because you don't want the audience to know. You're right.
Starting point is 02:12:14 You're right. And if anybody else wants to quit something, then you just let us know, and we can keep you – let's see how many we got. We might keep you accountable. We might call you out and be like, how are you doing? Yeah. And you have to answer us. That might keep you accountable. We might call you out and be like, how you doing? Yeah. And you have to answer us. That'd be pretty good.
Starting point is 02:12:29 I like that. I'll answer you. If someone even sees me out and they can look and see me, they can make sure I'm drinking. I'll drink tea. Unsweet tea could be count. Not sweet tea. It's got to be unsweet.
Starting point is 02:12:40 Or water. I just think no Coke products or sweet. You need those kind of drinks. Probably juices are fine. Right? Coffee, fine. Okay. Yeah.
Starting point is 02:12:51 But no Diet Cokes for me. No, no. No, yep. That kind of thing. Get out. None of that. So if you have something that you want to quit, and you can just tell us whenever, like, hey, I want to quit this.
Starting point is 02:13:02 We'll keep a running tab. Should they email probably best? Email. Sure the best it's better than my nose whistle comment so yeah please send us that nateland at natebargetzi.com if you want to quit something uh that's pretty fun i've been a hold of people up people accountable everybody wants to quit everybody wants to yeah so quit and then if we and we won't be to call everybody out every time but when we call your name to check on you you have to respond yeah you have to you have to be honest i'll be completely honest if i fall apart and have a diet coke yeah i'll tell you the truth and so you do it too uh that's why I put all this at the end so no one gets to it. What are you quitting?
Starting point is 02:13:46 Well, nose whistling first off. And don't worry, he did that. That was the first step. So let's just get past that and then we'll go from there. All right. Thank you guys. As always, we love you guys. All right.
Starting point is 02:14:00 Fist bumps around, baby. High fives. High fives. Yeah. Yeah. All right. Next bumps around, baby. High fives. High fives. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right, next week. See you. Thanks, everybody, for listening to the Nate Land Podcast.
Starting point is 02:14:18 Be sure to subscribe to our show on iTunes, Spotify, you know, wherever you listen to your podcasts. And please remember to leave us a rating or a comment. Nate Land is produced by me, Nate Bargetti, and my wife, Laura, on the All Things Comedy Network. Recording and editing for the show is done by Genovation Consulting
Starting point is 02:14:34 in partnership with Center Street Media. Thanks for tuning in. Be sure to catch us next week on the Nate Land Podcast.

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