The Nateland Podcast - #41 Philosophy

Episode Date: April 7, 2021

This episode, the topic is philosophy. The guys discuss famous philosophers, break down famous philosophical quotes, and determine if Nate could be a modern day philosopher.   Co-hosts: Brian Bates ( https://www.instagram.com/brianbatescomic) & Aaron Weber ( https://www.instagram.com/realaaronweber)   Podcast produced by Nate & Laura Bargatze Recording & Editing by Genovations Media https://www.natebargatze.com https://www.allthingscomedy.com https://www.genovationsmedia.com Email - [e-mail] To match with a licensed therapist today, go to talkspace.com. Make sure to use the code NATE to get $100 off of your first month and show your support for the show.    Helix is offering UP TO $200 off all mattress orders AND two free pillows for our listeners at HelixSleep.com/Nate

Hello, folks. Welcome to Nateland Podcasts with Aaron Weber, Brian Blunt. Welcome, everybody. uh glad to be back we're living it up uh we've had a you know had a good um i don't know i feel like we've had a break yeah it's been a few weeks right yeah a couple weeks yeah i guess not too crazy uh you were on the road at appleton in appleton it's great time. Appleton, Wisconsin. Did a whole new hour. Wow. So if people are coming to shows, I'm not saying it's all great, and I'm not saying that I'm always going to be. I think it was like 50, 55.

And the couple shows I did, a couple jokes on the special. So it's... But we're at least... I feel like we got a solid... got a pretty good 20 to 25. Pretty good. And then the rest is nonsense. Just absolute nonsense.

Before we get started, I want to give a quick shout out to Brett. Brett's a buddy of ours, and he's at St. Jude, and he's doing really good. Big fan of the podcast. Doesn't like one of y'all. I won't say which one. Brett privately told me. But we're with you, Brett.

And keep staying strong, buddy. So yeah, let's get, you know, we're getting to it, I guess. Do we have people quitting stuff? Did you have any of that or no? Oh, get, you know, we're getting into it, I guess. Do we have, like, people quitting stuff? Did you have any of that or no? Oh, well, I mean, that list I gave you had a bunch more on it. So I'm changing my quitting.

I'll go ahead and... So it's... When I realized soda's coming back in my life. I'm just bellowing. Starting now. Starting now. So, I mean, mean i did i quit drinking soda i did it for uh whatever it was two weeks special i mean i think i gained weight it was i was hoping that it would be this trigger that would stop me from eating nonsense and then i'm just uh learned i can still

eat pancakes with orange juice, and I'm fine. So going a little bit harder and going to stop sugar starting today. Wow. This is the day this podcast is out. Sugar. That's the key to my life, I think. And so soda's going to come back because I'm going to snap on everybody if I don't have something. Yeah. I'm going to lose my mind.

And I don't drink as much soda as I might lead on to. Laura buys little 12-ounce things. I don't always even finish them. I can kind of stay off of it. If I go out to eat, I can sometimes probably do a few more refills than I should. But I'm not, I don't think soda uh and i'll drink water but doesn't soda have sugar diet i drink diet so diet doesn't uh if i was like god ruins everything you know what changing it again hello they uh i just i'm not saying soda is great for you diet soda is great

for you but uh i gotta have something dude i have any, like, getting rid of all this stuff. But my problem is, as you can see back there, there's Sour Patch Kids, like, that kind of stuff. Ice cream. I'm eating ice cream every night. Every night. Sour Patch Kids, candy. It's a nightmare.

Sauces. I'm a big sauce. Like, I mean, just throwing just full-on stuff. Like, I mean, just throwing just full-on stuff. So with sugar, what I was told is I think I can eat like a sandwich. Like bread, I'm not really completely counting yet. I will hopefully get to it. But, I mean, if I eat a sandwich, it's like if I make a sandwich at home,

I got to have mustard on it. I can't have mayonnaise or load it up with a bunch of garbage. Yeah. And that's what will do the candy alone. So we will see. I'm going to try it for, let's do it for two weeks and we'll see where we're at. And I'll see if I change it again. But I'm hoping to, I think it'll be good. I mean, that gets rid of McDonald's.

I can't, because it's like ketchup and stuff like that. So I'm hoping that something's got to give. I didn't feel bloated after drinking diet, so quitting that. You inspired a lot of people when you announced you were quitting. Well, I'm still quitting something harder. So I'm stepping it. Something harder. Yeah. So I'm stepping it up a notch. Sugar is very hard.

It's not like you changed it to something easier. You went the exact opposite way. I mean, we have a packet of Sour Patch Kids back there from Kevin, our buddy Kevin. So that's where we're at. So let's see what happens. All right. Barfyman 362. Hello, folks, is now our secret word to recognize other Nate Landers in the wild.

Just shout it out, and they come out of the woodwork. We hope so. What did you say? Yell it at an airport and just see if anybody turns around. Hello, folks. It's a little bit nicer to yell than bomb is hello, folks. You know? Either one, people will come out.

That's right. No matter what. If you yell hello, folks, or bomb, you're going to get some attention. Kent Scroggins. Almost six months ago, I was sitting in a hospital room with my wife and a newborn son, listening to the animals episode and laughing uncontrollably at the penguin debate fast forward to now we are back in the hospital for my six month old son having lots of tests done on his heart we have been here a couple of days and have truly been waiting for the wednesday

morning drop of the latest nateland episode to take my mind off everything going on it's just what i needed thank you for the laughs we love y you all so much. Well, we love you, buddy. And yeah, we'll be thinking about you, praying for your son. He'll get in there, get in and out quick. You know, he's got a strong heart. Kids got strong hearts. Yeah. Yeah. That's Anon01010.

That sounds like a robot. Love listening to the podcast. It's nice because it's interesting, but not too interesting. If I zone out mid-listen, I don't feel the need to rewind. And that's what we're about. Yeah. You know, I think as a podcast, we're not trying to get you to sit there and have to, you go, what'd they say?

Rewind it. Yeah. We'll probably repeat it. We zone out ourselves and we don't even start over. sit there and have to, you go, what'd they say? Rewind it. Yeah. We'll probably repeat it. We zone out ourselves and we don't even start over. I'll just kind of tap back in and be like, oh man, where were we? Doesn't matter. We're doing a podcast.

I have never listened to an episode. You ever watch a movie with somebody and then they get up and you're like, do you want me to pause it? And they're like, nah, I'm good. And you're like, oh man, that's kind of what this is. Yeah. You just leave it running. I'll fill in the holes pretty easy, I think.

How long are we gone? I'm not sure. When they don't even give you, like, you're like, you should go in the bathroom back in a couple of seconds. No, I might do some stuff. But it doesn't matter. Leave it going. I bet I can catch up.

Evan Hegel, or Heig up. Evan Hegel. Hello, folks. I submitted an email last week regarding a funny story involving my best friend that I'm trying to get to listen to this podcast. I got this reply. Great story. Thanks for sharing. Never in my life have I read a response that better screamed at me, we're not going to read your dumb comment on our show.

The rejection itself was nicely worded, though, so I suppose I have a beanie baby to thank for that. Yeah, I mean, come on, man. We're getting hundreds of emails now. They're all so long, so boring. Oh, wow. I mean, I feel like I'm doing a nice gesture here by pretending like that was

interesting story and saying thanks so i mean yeah got it and another thing everyone thinks that you're checking these emails for some reason so everyone's emailing saying nate's your special was so awesome they're just yeah gushing about it and they'll occasionally throw in broccoli i wish you'd get rid of him yeah and. And I have to reply like you. Thanks, man. That's so sweet. I have to misspell on purpose and put commas in the wrong place

just so they feel like they're getting a personal response from you. Yeah. Well, now they know. Thank you. Yeah. I like, you know, great story. Great story.

Thanks for sharing. Sounds good. Appreciate you reaching out. Just get those responses. We do get it. We get, you get a ton of them. You go through them and you read them all.

Yeah. It's just a lot of work. Yeah. It's a lot of work to do. And I try to reply to them all, but yeah, sometimes you're just going to get great story. Thanks for sharing.

Yeah. That's cool, man. But we will read your entire complaint about that. If you want to get on and complain about my response. Uh, great story. Thanks for sharing is the equivalent of just rubbing a kid's head and

walking off. Good job, buddy. All right. Atta boy. Get out there. All right. Matt Parrish,

man. What if this is about the con artists episode, man, what a phenomenal episode. Gary had some great stories it was great watching nate aaron and barney just watching all and listen as gary talked about his absolutely insane childhood yeah i thought it was great too i mean it was definitely something different it was a different pod you know it wasn't just funny and silly but his life is like

kind of just kind of fun like it's funny yeah yeah con dad uh and even tell you what guys you were guys everybody our listeners there's a big help for him to he's working on trying to make this either his own podcast a book a movie something because he's had a crazy story so he's got to get practice in of describing and telling his story which is weird you have to learn how to talk about that yeah if he's never really talked about it never in detail you know we're asking questions if he goes and pitches this show they're going to ask questions so it's interesting and he gets to learn to tell it in a intriguing way i've been using some bigger words uh ian renfro this episode is a bit too. I feel like I'm learning things and hearing opinions from someone with an

actual firsthand knowledge of the topic. It's weird. And I don't like it. Let's get back to wild theories, minimal research and baseless accusations. Well, we're getting back to it. Today's his day.

Today's his day. And little fun fact, Gary doesn't have a dad. So what if that was the whole big twist? We made it up. Yeah. Turns out Gary's dad, a banker and a normal person. Yeah, pretty good dude, actually.

Pretty good guy. He was here. He drove him, picked him up. Glenn Rudolph. So this has been the best episode thus far. Lots of meat. Lots of meat. Just one question, though.

Is Brian trying to be a heel? I am sincerely asking. I cannot figure out his shtick brian i think a lot of audiences want to know this too go ahead brian i don't even know what that mean what is that like a bad guy yeah it's like wrestling like a heel like the guy like the villain kind of but yeah why would he does he mistaken you for me? No. I don't know. I think he's entertained by me. So he's asking, what are you doing?

Brian? I'm the heel here. Yeah. Yeah. I, no, I didn't think I was a heel. I thought I was a pretty nice guy,

but. His wrestling move is the nose whistle. And he, he gets you a head, the headlock and whistles in your nose, and you go, all right, you tap out. No more. The refs are trying to pull me off of him, but I'm still whistling. Your nose is just sticking out.

Your hands are in just, look at him. And he goes, I can't do it. It was a Rikishi that would just put his butt in your face yeah they'd rather have that than my nose whistle they have you you guys two wrestle just

it's like two just the kind of a really the knowing match the annoying you win the annoying belt like it's just a belt of annoyance

what is my thing that you would do as a wrestling move uh huh I mean why are you saying he's annoying? No, I said,

I said the other guy with the butt on the face. Oh, they're talking about Aaron. No, no, no. I think you would something with your body. I'd go for his foot.

I'm not, I'm not trying to lead you down a path, but I would use your body to the, I'd use what I get. Yeah. I think you would try to, you would, you would be like, what like what if I do this like I do like you do some kind of uh and they're like no what if you just that's what the butt guy they're like what if you just sit on his face and you're like I know but I can like jump you know so what if I climb on the top rope and they go I don't know man a lot

of guys are climbing on top rope so what if you just sit down your favorite activity and it's on that guy's face you ever think about that and then you're like uh yeah all right i guess i can't that had to be his conversation i know but i'd like i want to go high i can get really high imagine this force laying on him they go i know i i hear you but to here, your force is a lot. And so just sit down on the guy. Yeah. Freezy Bird. Like the Star Registry, you can buy one square foot of land in Scotland

and then add Lord or Lady to your airline tickets. I think of that more of a gimmick than a scam. I did not know that. I like that a lot. Yeah, I'd never heard that. You just be Lord. Your ticket says lord or lady i don't even know which one i would like ladies pretty lady bargett see yeah lady nate ladies are pretty like lord i know is like you're the lord of a manor yeah uh but the ladies are pretty good i don't know if you can choose lady bird yeah you

can choose you can get you can get a ladyship pack or a lordship pack it's 50 bucks that's not bad it's not bad at all and you get some land you get a square foot of land you have to buy the land and then you have to own something scotland you have to mow it they plant a tree and you're a little one one square foot of land i'm mowing you gotta mow the fact that you'd buy this land for 50 bucks and then you gotta fly there to go take care of it you gotta go take care of it landscape it get your weed eater it's just like if the guys going all right see you guys next month all right man we're saying and like it's just real quick just all right can I leave mine?

And then you talk to your neighbor and go, what if, how much would it cost me to pay you to do just a little more of a swipe? Just push it a little bit more. A little bit farther, hit me, come back. I'll buy you your land if you mow my land. Frank Galena, Galena, I am a lawyer and was literally on my way to court when I heard Nate say he think he could bluff his way through being a lawyer. Before you try, make sure you learn what the statute of limitations is for impersonating a lawyer. Yeah, what are statutes? What is it? Statute? Statute is the correct word.

Statute. It's not a statue? It's not a sculpture of limitations. Yeah, I got a sculpture of limitations. It's a statue of Brian. Pretty good. Yeah, I'm the heel. You're right, Glenn.

That's right. My mistake. I'll work on it. The crowd goes crazy. That's pretty funny. That'd be a pretty funny thing to say to someone. I got a statue of limitations and it's of you. It's a pretty good put down.

You guys should use that as a lawyer as you go in there. Yeah, you know what? I'm the greatest below average American. Middle aged episode. Rex final. know what all right i'm the greatest below average american middle-aged episode rex rex phenol final love how quickly this episode took a dark turn five minutes in and nate's asking brian when he thinks he'll be ready to die let him talk timothy ewing my great-grandmother's 103 and she's been ready to die for most of the time

I've known her the joke started in her mid 90s but now whenever someone walks in the room she just yells I'm ready to be done with this crap

God that's so funny to be most of the time he's known her just hey how you doing I'm your grandson Timothy oh god another one.

Timothy, I hoped we would never meet, but it looks like we are. I mean, good night, dude. I mean, Timothy's got to be. Great grandmother, so. Yeah. I mean, 103, Timothy's got to be 20. I mean, what if he, he could be old enough to have a kid. What if he has a kid?

And then she's like, are you kidding? Are you kidding? Like, it's a joke. Nick Robertson. There has to be some comedy gold hidden in the Bates golf swing. I about fell out of my chair laughing. And by the time I calmed down, he was just finishing his

follow through. There is definitely comedy gold in that swing. You see they put the video in the podcast last week gotta surprise me they're right here uh well on erin land yeah you just talked about i'm like you know did you see like we ship it off to scotland with our land and that's where they edit it did you see did you guys see that they they've been filming us this whole time has anybody seen that we've been doing this podcast on youtube uh yes that was very good that y'all put the golf swing in because you got to see it even a person that

doesn't golf i think would go what's what's his foot doing yeah compared it to a gymnast landing and then they like collect themselves that's exactly what a person's already kind of walked up there yeah yeah when his foot goes up the that person's already kind of walked up there yeah when his foot goes up the other person's already putting their tee in the ground and he's like

oh I didn't know you were done I didn't know you were done I like to when my little fun joke I started doing

is I like to when someone watches their tee shot for a long time like walk up there and then just be like you got everything wallet, keys?

Because they're just, you're like, get out of the way. You're watching this worm burner. You want to see it finish out? Don't worry, we'll walk by it. Lucas Vicroy. There's almost 14 minutes on court gestures and less than 90 seconds on the crusades. If that tells you anything about this pod,

that tells you a lot about this pod. I mean, that is exactly right. You guys have learned about the Crusades long enough. Right. Court gestures. Yeah, we spent 15 minutes on rolling the farter, and then we were just like, and the Crusades happened. Oh, wow, that seemed like a tough time.

Court what? Court gestures. How do you say it? Gestures? You got called out a lot for people. Oh. Jesters. Jesters.

Yeah. Gestures. You can say gestures. I say like Chester. Like Chester drawers. No, like. You think that's who invented them? Court jester and then in chester drawers

And he goes I'll just change it to CH And then didn't even notice We're going to sell Chester drawers on their website What do you mean that's jester It's not like I'm putting an H in there Yeah you're saying it like oh that was a nice gesture Gesture

But it's jester Just her Just her Who's in there? I'm saying it like, oh, that was a nice gesture. Gesture. But it's gesture. Gest her. Like, gest her. Gest her. Gest her. Gest her. Who's in there? Gest her.

She's in there alone. That's closer. Court gesture. Gest her. So I should say gest her. That's closer than gesture. Court gesture. That's better?

Gest her in court. that's better just her in court uh uh chris i mean yeah those words i have trouble like uh when there's you know those words there's a there's a collision of sounds right in the middle of them i have a tough time you know when there's a car wreck of noise in the middle of a word. I have a bit of a trouble, bit of a trouble with it. Christina Gerard. I have laughed hysterically at every single episode of them. My biggest laugh so far came from this episode where Nate said, I think we've got a new Krispy Kreme challenge.

I ugly laughed for so long that I think it was mainly the visual I had of the three of you doing it. Yeah, that's going to be our new one that we're going to go do. A lot of people said I got the whistling part now. I know. You got a leg up in this. Yeah. You're so talented you don't have to even worry about the whistling part. But if you focus on the whistling part, he goes, no, I don't even.

That's natural, dude. That's going to come out. It's the other stuff. I just do my thing. We ate Krispy Kreme to get ready for this challenge. Alan, there was no medieval. Oh, Alan is his name. That sounded like Alan, like I was telling him.

Alan, let me take some, Alan. There was no medieval scribe called Xerox. Are you kidding me, Alan? I'm telling him. I'm turning this comment around on him. Hey, Alan, guess what? There was no medieval scribe called Xerox. How do you feel about that?

Make him feel like he's the devil. Yeah. Your explanations of Bouncer, Red-Hand and don't chew the messenger are also false. There are references to killing a messenger in the times of ancient Greece, but no evidence of a law being passed in the Middle Ages to stop it happening. The explanation of pay through the nose is disputed, but again, there's no evidence for nose cutting as a punishment. What you said about nest egg, sink, or swim in Baker's Dozen might be right.

But Baker's Dozen is disputed. He's basically saying everything I threw out was wrong. We shouldn't have even done the episode. I don't know. What's your source, Alan? This guy's dropping a lot of facts here. He says it's called folk etymology. I didn't put that in there because...

So he's a folk etymologist? Etymologist. Etymology, I could say that. Oh. Some words are good. Some words are bad. But yeah, he's basically saying my information is incorrect. Yeah.

That's a shocker. Maybe Alan should go edit some Wikipedia entries in his spare time. Aaron. A little more on that on Aaron land. If you guys want to. This week, listen to Aaron and Caleb. Caleb's not here. Listen to Aaron.

Who's your guest this week? Well, it's just a solo pod this week. Oh. Just ranting. Listen to Aaron Break down Alan It's just a solo pod this week Just ranting Breaks down the Alan comment On Aaron land That'll actually be me going at Alan Like you were doing earlier Alright Alan

Alan comes in and defends himself on Aaron Land. We're going to roll. What's the thing? I always have to do that where you have to go, hey, everybody, you're watching. I'm Nate Bargetts. You're watching Nate Land Podcast. You have to do that.

We have to do it for Aaron Land. Like a little teaser. What's up, everybody? Nate Bargetts. You're listening to Nate Land and Aaron Land. Go. All right. go all right uh this week uh this this week we're gonna see this one could be i don't even know this could go off the rails real quick yeah uh we're gonna dive into a little

philosophy right yeah philosophy uh which is exactly dude yeah your favorite thing no okay yeah that's yeah i like it i found that a lot of stand-up comedians majored in philosophy knowledge and there's even a class philosophy of comedy because they say comedy and philosophy are the two professions where the goal is to find the central truths in what it is to be human. Yeah. So we're trying to figure stuff out. Yeah. So you majored in philosophy.

That was the goal. I failed a class called formal logic. Failed it twice. That sounds legit. Yeah. It was a tough class. Yeah. I failed it twice.

So technically i finished with a minor oh i didn't know that till right now yeah yeah but i'm like i'm literally one credit short of uh so why don't you go get that credit i don't i don't know if you can just tap back in and like i think i'm out you know they don't let you go back like maybe i can go i don't know how stuck in the minors you don't get to get up to I think maybe I can go. I don't know how. You're stuck in the minors? You don't get to get up to the big leagues? That's what happens in college? Somebody asked me about this recently.

I don't know if you can just be like, hey, can I just tap back in real quick? Was it your dad? No, it wasn't. That sounds like something your parents would have. You know, I was talking to someone the other day about if I should go to college and get a real job. Who was this? Oh, my mom and dad. And they. Yeah. Maybe I could. You guys could go back to school together. go to college you get a real job who was this oh my mom and dad uh and they yeah maybe i could i don't know back to school together i don't know how much that would change my life i got a long

way to go yeah i have zero you have a little more than one credit to get zero how many credits do you need to graduate a lot 100 uh i don't know no but you But you just, well, maybe. But you just wanted to take a class just to have some experience, right? I would, yeah. I would take a class to have, you know, when do you go to school? Monday to Friday, right? And then, so, I mean, where I'm going, probably, mine might be at night. This is after work.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, you got to go Monday to Friday. I want the real experience. Can you go take a class? Can you just hop into a college? That's what I'm wondering. I think to re-enroll, but I just want to tap back in real quick, take one class and then tap out.

But don't athletes that go play pro and they're short. You can do that. They go back. But you already graduated. Yeah, I've already graduated. So is the door shut because you graduated? I don't know. I'll send an email.

Why don't they teach you that in college? They probably should. This is probably something everybody knows except me. Maybe you should have discussed that with me. So what would you have been if you majored in philosophy? I have no idea. I wasn't thinking about that. Yeah.

I was just thinking I like it. Yeah. But are there people whose sole profession is philosophy? Yeah, you get into teaching or you'd be a writer or you'd go to law school. I mean, you can do stuff with it. But no one just sits around thinking of wise quotes. No, I don't think so.

You can work for a think tank or something, but I don't know if they want some dude in there. I had a professor who I saw on campus, and he would always ride his bike in a figure eight on the quad, and he'd smoke cigarettes and talk to himself and i just remember i saw him and i was like oh i want to take that guy's class yes like i want to hear what that guy's saying yeah yeah i would too yeah you're like what's going on in his head what's the quad just the middle of the quad's just like the grass in between in between the

buildings and stuff is it called a quad or just call it a quad? It's called a quad. Four buildings? Can a quad be outside of a college? I mean, if you can call your backyard a quad or something. I have been. I just want to know

if that's correct or not. So there's... I just know, all I know about the quad is from, from, God, I just blanked on the movie,

the Will Ferrell movie, Old School. Old School? Yeah. We're running into the quad. Like, that's theed on the movie, the Will Ferrell movie, Old School. Old School, yeah. We're running to the quad. Like, that's the only thing I know about the quad. And then I didn't, but then,

is it, so it's just the, where everybody kind of sits, like when you see a movie about college and they're all sitting in the field. That's where they are, yeah.

It's just like a little courtyard area between buildings. Does everybody call it a quad? We call it a quad, yeah. I thought it was the center of four buildings. I mean, that's probably what the actual definition of it is i guess i'd never thought about it before now just a grass so you're not into philosophy that much because i'm getting out

of the nit and gritty uh you probably had a quad it was just at the top of that hill so you never went no yeah i don't know where our quad was at. We would meet and smoke cigarettes at the parking lot of Ball State Community College. No, I didn't smoke. But that's the place that you guys want to go smoke some Marlboro Reds over in my car. That's what we called it. It was a quad. It was a four-door Honda that we would meet in. That was the quad.

That was the quad at Ball State. We'd go meet at the quad that was the quad head of vol state was we'd go you meet at the quad and we knew and everybody else would go to this field and they're like where are they we were we were in the real quad yeah so when you when you want to leave floss when did you tell your parents you're gonna do comedy uh i've been doing it probably six months so and they were happy yeah because i wasn't doing it full time i had a real job yeah yeah oh but they were just like fine you trying yeah yeah it makes no more sense than being a philosophy major were they fine with

that you know yeah yeah yeah my dad was a theology major i mean it's like it's kind of a thing in our family where you just don't have a practical degree or anything. So they were never that worried about it. Just trying to keep the dinner conversations fun. Yep. That's all y'all went to college for, just so y'all can come home on the holidays and get in a nice debate. Yep, yep. That's what it was all about.

Gregorian calendar. Yeah. Uh-huh. Y'all were just clapping at each other. Yep, yep, that's what it was all about. Aristotle and Gregorian calendar. Yeah. Y'all were just clapping at each other. Yeah, we're just throwing stuff at each other, running around. We played kickball yesterday, so that's what we were doing. But you guys would have been, you would have brought a blanket out and set it on the dirt. The quad?

The quad. Yeah. So, yeah, philosophy. I don't even know how to get into it. I knew nothing about philosophy. It means love of wisdom. That's what it means.

I knew the big philosopher. I didn't know anything about him, but I heard of him. Aristotle, which you've quoted on here. Ted Lasso. I don't know why y'all... I at talk to ted lasso that's true yeah aristotle doing this podcast is he ted lasso is so this says there's four branches of philosophy is that do you know that um no i mean i i haven't heard it broken down like that. I mean, I'm sure it makes sense. It's a very good answer to be, I mean, that's like a, that's a like philosophy answer to

go. No, I don't think we were breaking it down when we were doing it. Go ahead, Brian. You know, when I took that class, we weren't, I don't think that was being done yet, but go ahead. What did you hear? I'll tell you. That's true.

Is it, uh, government? Is it the justice system? Uh, I'm trying to spitball here. Is it government? Is it the justice system? I'm trying to spitball here. Quad? Metaphysics? Yeah. Epistemology?

Epistemology, yeah. All right. Do you know what he's talking about now? Yeah. I've heard of these words. Yeah. What's the final two here? What do you have? You have epistemology and metaphysics. I don't know. What are the final two here? What do you have? You have epistemology and metaphysics.

I don't know. What are the other two? Exology, which means ethics. And the last one's logic. Do you know what any of those mean? Yeah, I know what all those words mean, but I don't know. I've never heard it broken down like that. There are four different types but you could tell me what epistemology yeah what does it mean it's just how we come to know things how we knowledge right like so like to me i just learned that right now from him epistemologically so he would be my answer for that they They would say epist- What is it? That's what it means, right?

I mean, the fundamental nature of existence and reality. Oh, wait. Yeah. Knowledge and belief. Yeah. Sorry, knowledge and belief. Yeah. Of where you learn it?

Yeah. And I learned it here? How we know what we know. How we know what we know. Yeah. I know it because of him. That would be my answer in that class where did you how do you know that you told me how do you know yeah that seems like yeah that's

what did you teach that class and you're like i am at the last day you go and by the way i am the whatever the word is what's the word i don't know the word epistemology epistemology epistemology that was the last thing he says before you walk out i am you're done and know that i am your epistemology because he is where you learned it is that not i mean that and like the the ego on this guy like he he reveals it at the end and you go oh you could just said that at the beginning probably and he goes i could have but i wanted a semester's worth of telling you and then you always have to say who's your epistemology guy yeah and you go well it's like your exterminator you have an epistemology guy you got a good guy he's pretty reasonable uh do you have an answer to that because i think that's a good question

i kind of lost track of what the question metaphysics do you know what that is yeah i mean i can explain metaphysics is beyond beyond physics meta just means beyond in a way it's like uh metaphysics is talking about things that aren't necessarily in the physical world that sounds like a neat answer. Spirits? Anything you can't put under a microscope and look at. Light? Energy?

Those are physical things. I don't know. Stuff you can't see. Air? Oxygen? Sure. That would be a metaphysical thing yeah what'd you say yeah i said oxygen i was naming like just something that doesn't exist i was thinking oxygen almost small things like uh gravity is covid a part of it? Is COVID metaphysical? Nah, it's a real thing, man.

Oh, it is? Oh, but love's a real thing. Oh, so emotion. Stuff that you can't measure? Yeah, stuff that can't be observed and perceived through the senses. Your conscience? Yeah. God.

How about right and wrong? That would be a metaphysical thing maybe. Yeah. Could you give us an example? I just did. Okay. Yeah. Right or wrong. We'll get into it. We're not even into it yet.

I'm almost done. We're still reading the definition of philosophy nate was about to say okay we done let's wrap this up it's been about an hour and a half right how do you think i feel about this episode right now is that described in those words that you just said metaphysically yeah i think so okay so is who's the most plato is that the most famous philosopher aristotle probably but plato's right who would have been more fun to be with? Good question. Yeah. Well, that's a good question, because Plato asked, you can discover more about a person in an hour of play than in a year of conversation.

An hour of play? So he's like, you can learn more about a guy on the golf course than hanging out with him for days. Is that right? Or chilies. Yeah, I've never heard that quote before but i i think that makes a lot of sense yeah i mean you're debating plato said it so i mean that's i think the audacity alone of just going uh aaron you think plato was right on that you're like no i think that guy's a quack job he's a quad job if you know what i mean yeah these are all the smartest people who have ever lived all these philosophers i think yeah so it's it's it's easy to look back at them now knowing

everything we know now about science and technology and stuff and just think that they're ridiculous but well i think they're the smartest people ever ever over albert einstein yeah well you know it wasn't until pretty recently that we made distinctions between all the sciences so like when you hear that these guys are philosophers they were biologists and physicists they just did everything it was all just under one umbrella kind of yeah you know but the other science is like that's like when you did it before they had it broken up into four things when you were doing it that's why you didn't know the four things because you're like, we were kind of doing it all under one thing.

Oh, but I guess now we're breaking it up even more. Science is advanced, so researchers are doing different types of science than they did 500 years ago. Sure. But isn't philosophy, aren't they debating the same stuff today? Yeah, there's still a lot of debate

about it, for sure. So is there any advancement in philosophy is anybody oh yeah figured out some new questions oh yeah yeah it's there's still a lot going on in the philosophical world is it just like can you hear a tree if it falls in the woods there's all kinds of good stuff like so there's guys that are just figuring that question like i don't know like uh we got more riddlers basically he's coming around that's what philosophy kids have some of the best philosophy yeah could god build make a rock so big that even he couldn't lift it it's a paradox and so y'all just talk about that for

an hour and then what do you bring to the real world after that conversation that's what these are the building blocks of everything that we know yeah of of all society these are the building blocks of everything that we know of of all society these are like fundamental questions that that people have been trying to answer for for years so it's like you gotta remember these guys are starting with nothing we have the benefit of thousands of years of yeah a functioning society these people are like let's try to figure everything out we got nothing yeah what if a thousand years and then you find out the answer is no to what what do you do to what question any of them they all ask yes and no question same yeah it's like kind of good you're like no and then you go okay so let's let's do i want to talk about

some of those those paradoxes that I sent you. Okay. So before all of the guys you've heard of, Aristotle, Plato, there's a guy named Parmenides. I don't know if I'm saying his name correctly, but he was also the name of my World of Warcraft character for a while. Parmenides, the main thing he's known for is he believed that all motion and movement is impossible. So anytime you think something is moving or something is changing, that's just an illusion. Yeah. Is this Zeno?

Yeah. So Zeno created these paradoxes to back Parmenides up. Okay. To kind of illustrate the same point. So here's the paradox. It's called the dichotomy paradox, which just means to cut in two. So let's say, Nate, you wanted to reach across the table and slap me in the face. Yeah.

Okay? Just... Are you a mind eater too? Just wrap your head around that. Yeah. In order to do that, you would have to get your hand halfway across this table first, right? And in order to get to that point, you would have to get it halfway to that point, a quarter of the way across the table. But before you get that point, you would have to get it halfway to that point, a quarter of the way across the table. But before you get it there, you would have to get it halfway to that point,

an eighth of the way across the table. You can keep doing that an infinite amount of times. Therefore, it is impossible for you to reach across the table and slap me in the face. Yeah. So that's the paradox there. Because to get to any point, you have to first get halfway to that point.

But if my full reach can get to you, I don't care if you break it down into all these little lines. You'd be like, well, there's a thousand lines you've got to cross on that table. Yeah. Well, I have the arm length to cross. Well, it certainly looks as if you're doing that. But logically, it's impossible for you to do it. Just test it out and see. Let's do an experiment.

But it's not if I could. Yeah, I'm saying what... Did he get slapped when he said this? Did that... I mean, that's how much this guy could have been... People didn't like it, man. I'd imagine. Yeah.

He goes, so you can't even... Boom. And he's like, all right, okay. Okay. But logically, how can you explain that because you agree with the premises right of this right that to get to any point you have to get halfway there first but i know but if i if i can reach that then it doesn't really matter how much you're breaking down you can make up a bunch of words that keep going but halfway here and halfway there

and but if if the reach is the reach the reach is the the reach. Okay. So if it's going to happen, if it's got the link to do it, you can't talk me out of my reach. Yeah. Okay. I'm saying it certainly looks like you're doing that, but logically it's impossible for you to do it. So this is all an illusion. Oh, this is.

Yeah, that's all an illusion. Yeah. In terms we would understand, is it like when the ball's on the half inch line and someone jumps off sides and they say half a distance yeah they keep going half the distance there's nowhere else to go right yeah you just well you zoom in a bunch and you just you'd never get there eventually you'd never get there if you just keep going halfway to the goal but if you do get there in real life then then what's then what does the guy say to that certainly. But if you do get there in real life, then what does the guy say to that?

It certainly appears as if you get there, yeah. If it appears and you feel when my hand hits your face and you go, it does feel like you hit me. Because then technically, then I can hit you and then if I get arrested, I'll be like, why didn't it hit him?

Because it's impossible for me to hit him. And then your boy Xerox, your boy Zeno, his tone's going to change when the cops show up. And he goes, he hit me. And you go, but you said I couldn't because of the, tell him. I would say, tell him. Tell the cop what he said. And the cop's sitting there. He goes, he's going to write this down.

What'd you say? He goes, I was trying to tell him that half of the, he couldn't hit me. And then what do you do? He hit me. But logically, then I would go to tell him that half of the hat he couldn't hit me and then what do you do he hit me but logically i then i would go tell him logically though could i do it logically and then and then xeno goes logically no he can't do it i go then where are we doing here and the cop lets me go that's what you want as your lawyer right there you want to talk about that i should be a lawyer there you go i mean obviously i agree with you but that's that's just that was god thousands of years ago people people are talking about that so

yeah there's another one he has another one if you if you go outside in your backyard and you drop a grain of rice on the grass that doesn't make a sound right you're not gonna hear but if you drop a thousand grains of rice on the grass you will hear that but how is that possible because it's a thousand zeros doesn't equal anything other than zero so that's all an illusion too but if it but the the one grain that you're dropping does make a sound you just can't hear it so the more i stack on to it yeah that's exactly yeah yeah that's exactly did he have anybody to talk to like did this is aaron's hero could he try out on somebody did he have a buddy an open mic just someone that goes what are you crazy dude you're gonna you're gonna tell the real world this i mean i would have

crushed it a thousand years ago was he like but you have the benefit of all these guys knowledge yeah and and you live now yeah imagine being the first guy to even think about any of this stuff yeah like it's true you know yeah pretty crazy so he worked at applebee's and he dropped a thousand grains of rice and he's like technically i did nothing yeah yeah uh okay well back to plato um do you guys buy into the theory of his you can learn more about probably not go ahead playing then do you learn about people in the golf course that you wouldn't learn the other way it's probably right and wrong fairness i play oh do i learn about them yeah i played with a guy here's yes i do i what i do believe i believe most people lie about what they're doing yeah i think of it working out i think people

tell you they work out and i if you could go see their workout i bet it wouldn't be working out i uh veder who works out gary did our workout that we've been doing here, and he was like, oh, that's like a real workout. Now I'm working out with a guy that's showing me how. But it just shows me that I'm like – but if I ask Gary if he works out, he would tell me he does. And everybody says they do. So I think people say they do a lot more than they do. And I think it goes down to just anything.

To them, they can do something. They can say, oh, no, yeah, I went to the range and hit some balls the other day. And they could have went up there for 10 minutes. But they put out the statement of, like, I'm Tiger Woods. I've been up there practicing all day. But they don't go, I barely did anything. I did not accomplish anything. But they throw out that they did accomplish anything.

And I think that happens a lot. In the golf course, I see it. I played with it. We played with a guy one day, and I told him to, you know, hit another, just take another ball, hit another ball. And I even have it when I play with you, where I tell you when I say pick the ball up, right, and you say I want to put the ball in the cup.

The way I look at it is like you're trying to be like, well, I i don't want to cheat but you are going to cheat because when you hit one out of bounds and i say hit another one you could go okay because you you're like all right i don't have to count it you're like no so you do cheat but then you're going to make me watch you miss five putts from a foot out it took a hard turn yeah no but like the logic but the logic of that is some reason mentally I played with another guy. He wanted to – I was like, just you're good. I gave him a putt. It's like a 10-foot putt. I gave it to him.

This guy's shooting 150 out there. 10 feet. Don't worry about it, man. But they're like, no, I want to hear the ball come in. All right, if you want to putt this, then you've got to pick it up somewhere else. He's already cheating. He's not playing by the rules. He's already kind of moving the ball around,

hitting a mulligan here and there. So if you're going to cheat, dude, cheat. But make it all come together. If you want to hear that ball go in, then, I don't know, cheat more up at the top and then drop at the end. But your score doesn't matter. You getting out here is the objective.

The other guy that was this guy that told me the same thing. It's always someone they go, no, I told him to take a mulligan. He said, I don't take mulligans. I'll play the ball. And I watch this guy in this hole. Ball goes off to the right. It's par three. Goes off into just the grass.

It's gone, right? He goes, I'll take a mulligan. All right, no, he won't take a mulligan. Goes up there. Tries to hit it out of the grass. It's gone. He goes, I'll take a mulligan. No, he won't take a mulligan. Goes up there. Tries to hit it out of the grass. Cannot get it out of the grass. Ends up throwing it out of the grass. Ends up chipping it 100 times up onto the green.

He's just like, well, I'll just pick up. It's a double bogey. You're like, alright. You're cheating. Don't make me feel stupid for trying to give you a shot at the tee. When I go, dude, just do a mulligan, and you act like you're holier than thou. But then I watch you cheat within three minutes of you acting like you're not this cheater. Yeah.

Because they will cheat once their back's against the wall, and they don't want to... And they hit a bad shot. That's not fun. So once the fun gets taken, then they do it. So I notice that a lot. I see that a bunch. It drives me crazy. And you wouldn't see somebody's character put to the test like that

in just a conversation at a restaurant, you know? No, no, yeah, yeah, yeah. You're right. You can see that they're like, are they, you know, Felix, who we always, you know, everybody talks about him in this podcast, but like he's not good at golf and, uh, he's working on getting better,

but Felix will just, he'll hit a bad shot and he goes and drops the ball with you at the next shot. Cause that's what it's about. It's not about like, let's all go look for his ball every hole or something. It's like, you're out here,

dude, just come. If you're playing with guys better than you, your score means nothing that day. To be honest. Now I know people are people like but i want to play for real then you go place on your own somewhere else if you're really bad just i want you to it's fun to be out there all of us together and we can do it but don't be this don't hold up the people that are actually someone else i played with that i mean i watched him play, and I tried to give him a putt.

He goes, no, no, we're playing a nice course. I'm going to take it serious. And I was like, I'm not – and I told him, I was like, I can't watch this all day. So you're going to have to take some stuff. Like they don't – I don't think they know it. Like golf is very – it kind of can be very loose. It's very – I think people think it's about the rules, and it is if you're playing in a real competitive kind of format.

That's why, like, a match play format's really good because it can just be like, if I beat you on the hole, then you can pick the ball up. I know everybody wants to know their score, but if I can already guess your score's going to be over 100, well over 100, then it's like just kind of – it's also about the hang. And don't make it where you hate it.

You're going to hate it. If you, if I make you count every stroke, you're going to shoot 150. If I make you count every stroke, that's not fun. Yeah. We shared on here a couple of weeks ago,

our philosophy on life is kind of just not to be noticed. Right. Can we all say that? Yeah. And golf is the ultimate place where you and I know we're not going to be great. We just don't want to be so bad. Just don't be a liability.

Get out of the way. Just get out of the way. I know you want to hear a ball go in the cup. I get that. But it's also like, then putt it twice. And hit it before the other person putts. No one cares about that when you're playing. Go hit it twice.

Get it in the cup. Do whatever you want. And then get out of the way. But don't be lining this up and all this kind of crazy stuff. If you've got a birdie putt, or a legit par, or maybe legit even bogey, we're going to let you be like, no, take it serious and putt it. But when it's for a 10th. Yeah, your 10th stroke. It's just like, all right, dude.

Come on. Relax. Relax. Yeah. All right, so Aristotle and Plato are kind of known as the fathers of Western philosophy. Aristotle, another golf thing here. We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence is not an act, but a habit.

So I think that as practice, practice, practice. Right? Yeah. His whole thing was about the goal of life is to live well. Living well. And he kind of laid out this exact plan of how to live the best life. Who is this? This is Aristotle.

So when he says excellence... I just said it like it was a comment. What's his name? This is Alan. Yeah, where did he go to high school? Go ahead, Ray. Tanner Newcomb? Yeah.

So excellence is a habit. What does he mean by that? Just doing something repeatedly. Living your life a certain way and it becomes habit? Yeah. Yeah, just doing all the right things. That makes me think like the 10,000 hour thing. Yeah.

Yeah, the Malcolm Gladwell. Well, that's how you get excellence. Yeah, that book, 10,000 yeah like the beatles they played and people don't know it but the beatles played at just some bar i think or something for a couple years before people never even heard of them so like the hours i always say that with new york new york is do you think you've been on stage for more than 10 000 hours i guess you start doing hours then that starts to add up pretty quick i mean you do a hundred so if i do a hundred dates it's a hundred hours a year on top of you're adding all your extra kind of stuff yeah but i mean 100 hours a year that would be what would

that take that'd take 10 years to get a thousand thousand yeah i mean that would so you have to do more than 100 hours a year i i bet it's your 10 000 hours i to me i don't feel like it's exact it means it doesn't necessarily mean exactly i know i was just curious but it's uh because but i think i think that's why new york was so good is i always say new york it's like dog years so it's like you just or if you meet a two-year comic from somewhere else you're you know what a seven-year comic like or whatever what is it nine years seven years old 14 yeah you're just end up being the not necessarily but you just end up being a lot more because i'm going up every single night multiple times a night even if it's for 10 minutes here and there or whatever it is and the time gets more and more yeah you just get

you just say stuff so much and you're in front of people so much. You're so much – I mean, even though most of your life is not in front of people, most of your life or professional life is just all in front of people. It's just talking to people. Yeah. And so you just get really good at knowing how to now do that. And you learn how to – all the words I can't say, I know how to learn to not use those.

You learn all these little things that go, well, I can't do that. And then you figure out other ways. Socrates, another one of the big fathers of Western philosophy. How did these guys get so smart? Yeah. Well, they're just born smart. Did they go to school?

Did they go? Yeah, they devoted their whole life to this. Yeah. And they're also just by chance the smartest people ever. Yeah, yeah. But did they... Was there college and stuff? Were they going to...

Well, these guys set up... Plato set up one of the first... The first, I think, right? The first institution of higher learning, and they would just get all these dudes together and just be like, let's just figure stuff stuff out let's just sit around and think you'd be offended that there's play-doh wait what that you play with play-doh kids play with play-doh like he would like he would if you if he was there and you go uh play-doh and he goes yes and you go no no no right behind you could you hand me that play-doh right there and he's like all right and then he would he be does no one want to ask me any

questions and you go i don't know we're playing play-doh a little more fun than whatever nonsense you're gonna yell at me oh i've never made that connection between the two of them well spelled differently that's probably why i know i know but it's too high on your high horse yeah we learned that don't get a seat we learned that last week oh oh it's probably why i know but it's too high on your high horse yeah we learned that don't get his seat we learned that last week oh oh it's probably wrong yeah it was wrong oh yeah according to alan yeah we'll talk about it on my wikipedia how did uh i wonder how they found each other these smart guys you know like you know socrates just in the same area three towns over yeah these are all ancient greeks these three aristotle plato and socrates socrates

yeah do they they all taught each other too are they out with the what's the years are they like this is uh like 400 bc yeah socrates was first and then i believe he taught plato and then plato taught aristotle yeah aristotle briefly taught alexander the great yeah for a little while it was like a famous pupil what made's what made him great, right? Yes. Talk about the other names are so good. And then he's like, what's your name? He goes, Alexander the Great.

And you go, all right. So I'm Aristotle, right? And that's Plato. That's Socrates. You see what I mean? Like, it's kind of like a thing. And he goes, so like, what do you want to be? And he goes, I'm Alexander the Great.

And he goes, okay. No, he's not Alex. Alex. The least creative nickname. Alex, can I talk to you for he's not Alex. This is Alex. The least creative dick name. Alex, can I talk to you for a second? Alex. What are we doing here? Ow.

Come on. Ow. We all have these kind of, you know what I mean? Like, they're kind of fun names. Pope Greg. Come on. Pope Greg. Yeah, it's the same thing.

Was Aristotle, was his real name? Yeah, these are all Greek names. Ari? Yeah. Did he go by Ari? He might have gone by Ari. What did his mom call him? Aristotle.

Yeah. That's Greek? Yeah. Come to dinner. Aristotle. Something like that. And then he said, mom, are we even eating this dinner? And she slapped him across the table.

What is this dinner? What is this dinner? What is a table? What is a table? What is a table? That's the, dude, that's the stuff I really like about Aristotle, of just the question of like, what is stuff? Like this table, right? Yeah.

This table. What makes this table a table? What are some of the properties of this table? It's made out of wood, right? It's a wooden table? Yeah. Yeah. So if it were not made out of wood, if this were steel, would it still be a table? Yeah.

Okay. So it's not the woodiness that makes this a table. Yeah. Tomorrow, is this still going to be a table? I don't know. That's another question. Was this a table last week? I mean, people have complained about it.

The table? Yeah. I might break it after talking about but it's not a function of time right it's not a function of time that makes this a table yeah and what if we pick this up and move this in the other room what if it would still be a table yeah but what if we said that it's just a word we're using because we put our stuff on it and so and i don't have to do this every time what have you told her i know what have you told her saw that he, so is it a table? I go, I know, but like we're trying to live a life, dude.

So I can't when it's like, you know, I got four kids. I'm like, your breakfast is on the table. I can't. Wait, well, what is the table? We can't miss school again because we're going, what is a table? Look, well, that's why all these guys did this for us. So we don't have to do it all. Were they single guys?

Well, they were doing weird stuff back then, so I don't want to. Yeah, that's another. There's a lot going on. That's Aaron. Maybe weird to you. You might want to hear that episode on Batesville, where uncensored and he gets after it. But the point is.

The expert is fly. The point is that the essence of this is a table aristotle would say that it has the essence of a table and all these other things are just he called them accidental properties of it this is like revolutionary stuff at the time to like what is a thing is it just a collection of all these different properties or there's no answer i mean there's debate about about about What's the right way to think about stuff There's still debate about it Yeah I mean we're debating about You know taxes and stuff now

They were debating about a table Well when's a human really a human Yeah well exactly Exactly Big questions man What's the answer It's a lot Say for the patreon episode

i feel like uh aristotle's like his if he's not married his girlfriend every girlfriend was just like like i mean just a lot of just that because it's just like i don't know yeah these guys might have been insufferable to be around. Oh, it might have been brutal. But I think they just... But they were... Plato had these symposiums where they would just sit around and just lively discussion. They'd just talk like this.

That's like their whole existence. So they were about the same age? Yeah, well, Plato was before... Aristotle was like the generation after Plato. They taught each other. Socrates was first. Yeah, Socrates was the first guy. Would they have all met?

I don't know if Socrates ever met Aristotle, but definitely. So their connection to them was, they were. Yeah. How long did they live back then? They would live till like their 40s. I think Plato lived till he was 80, but like lived until he was in his 40s. I mean, does you think Aristotle felt bad that he had no pupils that we even... They were rolling. Well, he had Alexander the Great.

He had Alexander the Great, briefly. Alex? Yeah, but the fact that the chain ended right there, and there was no famous philosopher after him. But he also inspired, I mean, thousands of years of philosophers all talking about aristotle plato sitting there and he goes so who are you gonna use as your pupil he's like he's he's a good guy i don't you know i see a lot of stuff in him he goes yeah but just tell me a little bit about him and he goes i don't know man he's just he's not the theme that you might want

but i think it's like good for us to go outside the box. He goes, yeah, dude, no judgment at all. What's his name? Alexander the Great. You go, oh, you call him that? He goes, no, no, no. He made that name up himself. He came up with him as Alexander the Great.

Then he plays, what's that noise? It's him. He's stomping up the stairs right now. He's about to barrel in here. He's going to call you weak and probably some other words. Yeah. And then blade over. St. Thomas Aquinas.

Aaron sent me these notes. Widely considered the most important Christian thinker of all time. I would say Jesus, but Aaron feels like this guy is. Okay. No, above Jesus. Wow. Okay, Aaron. That's what you think.

He developed the five proofs of the existence of God. What are those? Well, I can't remember them off the top of my head. The first mover, that's the first one. These are like logical proofs or arguments. The first mover would be for anything to be set in motion, it has to be set in motion by something else, right? And then that thing must have been set in motion by someone else.

And then you trace that all the way back to infinity. Right. Eventually, there has to be something that moves something without being moved by somebody else. The first mover. And then that's God. I've always felt like the kid argument holds up of the people who argue the Big Bang. Then who created that? Right.

You know. Right. That's that. Yeah. That's that's ultimately what it is. Yeah. Yeah. Well, who did the first thing?

Right. Something that didn't need to be moved by something else. Yeah. There is. I know. I just listened to Coach Lucy Kay's. They were playing it on the radio, Sirius. It was a news special.

He had a whole thing about God. And just one thing that was really funny was he said, he says, God could really, with a five-minute press conference, he could clear up just so many things. God just came down, just five minutes, dude. Just pop up and just say, hey, will everybody know? How you doing? I'm here.

And then it'd be good. Very funny. That's a great bit. Just five minutes, dude. Just pop up and just say, hey, will everybody know how you're doing? I'm here. And then it'd be good. Very funny. That's a great bit. Rene Descartes? Descartes. Oh, Descartes. Rene Descartes.

Got some extra letters that he didn't need. No, he's French. I thought it was a woman. Father of modern... I feel like everybody's the father of... He's the father of modern philosophy. He has the most famous quote in the history of mankind. I think. I think it is.

You think. Oh, that's not a true statement? That's Aaron? That's Aaron? That's my editorialization of it, for sure. That's so funny. So you put on there the most famous quote of all time? Yeah.

What is it, Nate? That's just your idea of what you think is the most famous quote. I'd like to hear what you think is a more famous quote than cogito ergo sum, I think therefore I am. I think therefore I am.

I mean, you've heard that before, right? Right now. Yeah. It's like, I can't think of a more, I would say maybe one small step for man,

one giant leap for mankind. I can't think of another quote. You had me at hello, Jerry Maguire. That is a is a great cowabunga may the force be with you i mean i mean yeah that's up there i guess but i think therefore i am i think therefore i am which means what so renee descartes, he wrote a series on it. Oh, I know who that is. What did you say his name was? Rene Descartes?

Yeah. I think I've heard that. Rene Descartes. You're like, oh, that's the same person. He wrote these things. How you doing, ma'am? I'm a guy. Sorry about that.

Sorry, Rene. Go ahead, Rene. They're called meditations. And he just set out to, what do i know for sure what do i know is real it's like those infomercials you're like forget everything you know about mattresses you know or whatever he was like forget everything i know about everything let's start all the way over so let's just remove everything i think is real and then what can i build back piece by piece so eventually he got all the way over. So let's just remove everything I think is real. And then what can I build back piece by piece? So eventually he got all the way down to how do I know that I am a real thing?

And he's trying to anticipate every rebuttal to this. He's like, what if it's a demon deceiving me? But eventually he concludes the fact that I'm here asking this question means that I definitely exist. Because there's a doubter. There's a questioner. And it's, I think, therefore I am. That's where it comes from. Does he...

This should be good. I mean, where do you get these quotes at? How do they get, does he just sit at a table at dinner know dinner and then he's just this guy lived alone believe it or not yeah his mailman comes over and he goes hey fred how you doing he goes yeah how are you doing he goes well i think therefore i am so and he kind of and then just looks at him just look to the phone to see his reaction and then he's just already back in the truck and he's like all right all right i'll try again like he's just trying to i mean just anybody walk you know i'll take a piece of gum i think i think how's the weather today i think therefore i am and then always just stares at him to see if it's catching

on yeah it's even hits stands up yeah like he's just slowly just kind of throwing it out uh-huh so i guess it was wrote in his he wrote it he wrote it but but literally it was a thought exercise let me go into this dark room yeah and just like are these guys what do i know for sure a lot of them didn't make a lot of money but i think back then a lot of these guys were like subsidized by whatever kingdom they lived in or whatever you know yeah they had food and stuff yeah i think they were there were teachers too so, so they could make some money doing that. Would they go out? Would they hang out?

Descartes doesn't sound like a fun dude to hang out with, because he's just doubting everything. How do we know that that's real? But I don't know. I don't know how much. He didn't feel like normal guys. I feel like they were more like the professor I had, riding his bike in a figure eight, smoking a cigarette, talking to himself.

They're just so burdened by it. They're smart that it's like debilitating, I think. They could almost be a homeless person in the street now. Like you could, they could talk themselves into getting into that. And that's the hard part with crazy people in the street is, you know, some of them are doing some good stuff, but you got to get through, you got to mine through it to find. Some of them are gonna stab you in the heart with a pencil and some are really good at what they talk about it's like a comedy open mic there's gonna be a couple of geniuses in there a bunch of crazies uh-huh

and some people i mean not some people say a hundred years of open mic yeah you're right like every open mic we go to yeah there's a couple of geniuses but don't you don't you get an open mic where you're like, they're a crazy person. Like, this is like so close to being genius. Yeah. It's like right there.

If they just tweaked something. Yeah. You know, Baruch Spinoza. Yeah. Spinoza. Oh, I feel like you had a little beef with him.

It's not like it was a comic. Oh, Spinoza. Spinoza. What happened with Spinoza? Spinoza was crazy, man. He believed in something called substance monism,

which means... This is a clean show, Aaron. Yes, which means there's only one... Like, if you had to guess how many different things there are in the universe, what would you guess? It would be endless, right?

Yeah. He thinks all of... There's only one thing. universe, what would you guess? It would be endless, right? Yeah. 60 years. He thinks all of... There's only one thing. God is the only one substance, and we're all just modes or attributes of God, like wrinkles in a carpet. You wouldn't call a wrinkle in a carpet its own thing. It's just a wrinkle in the large carpet.

So you think there's only one thing. A lot of podcasts. I mean, just a lot of podcasts. Too many. Talking wrinkle over wrinkle. Welcome to the wrinkle podcast. Yeah. It's just God and the rest of us are just

side effects. Not side effects. Yeah. God, the language is so tricky with some of this stuff. Can't remember if it's modes or attributes, but we're all just... If you think...

I like the wrinkle description better. Wrinkle one's good. Than the other words. But if you think God, by definition, is something that's all over and everywhere, then how can there be something that's not part of him?

You know? If he's everywhere and in everything, then is he in this cup, you know? Do you think philosophers talk to the most people that are trailing off than any human possible? Like, is there... Whole existence, do you think that they that's why they talk to each other because everybody else just kind of trails that's a good point because

a lot of this is just like we just know this from letters to each other where they're arguing about it they're not like these aren't famous like let's go out and the the town square and everybody's like man these guys are super interesting yeah because they're not really a lot of them. Yeah. That's there. So what, what is like, and what is like philosophy? What does it like solve? Like, what does it bring to the world? Just like us thinking about stuff? Like it's just. No, it's everything. I mean, we're benefiting from all of this stuff having been argued and discussed

because we have thousands of years of people figure but like laws and concepts and definitions and what are things and how that this is they're all figuring this out before anybody was able to that's all it is so understanding like the building blocks of of civilization really yeah you know i think i could be a philosopher i think you're good actually man i think you feel like you need yeah you gotta have just kind of uh so last week you were a lawyer and this week i can do a lot of things yeah yeah uh but it's like you're just like overthinking yeah your brain's got to go 24 7 doesn't ever cut off yeah that's what he said like comedy a lot of comedians and philosophers you know i don't know so your philosophy on comedy is you've said this uh whenever you get comfortable it's time to move that's my philosophy as well

that's why i've always lived here um but you got that from someone else, but that's a good philosophy on life. And you hold to that, right? Yeah. You start feeling comfortable, it's time to make a change. But would that be considered a philosophy? Oh, sure. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Okay. It's a rule to live by. All right. I want to ask you about a couple of these famous quotes. God is dead, Friedrich Nietzsche. Yeah. I looked this up.

He didn't literally mean God has died. Right. He meant humankind, civilization, we've kind of killed the concept of God. Is that right? Because he said that God was just an explanation for things that we couldn't understand as a society. We just said, oh, that's God. And he said, now we know enough that we no longer need that. So God is dead.

And that's, yeah. When was that? I don't remember when Nietzsche was. 1600s? 1700s? Was he a painter? Oh, was it Nietzsche? Nietzsche.

Was he a painter? There's a Nietzsche painting. Yeah, that's N-I-C-H-E. Who's that? I don't know. Bob Nietzsche? Was he a painter? Nietzsche, Nietzsche. No, wait, there's a Nietzsche painting. Yeah, that's N-I-C-H-E. Who's that? I don't know. Bob Nietzsche? This is late 1800s, this guy lived. Okay, good.

So in 1900, God said, Nietzsche's dead. What'd you say it was? Late 1800s. Oh. He also said, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, right? I thought that was Kanye. Nietzsche said that? Yep.

You really thought it was Kanye? Oh, he's in that song. Yeah. He said that in that song. You know what song I'm talking about? I thought that was Katy Perry. What doesn't kill you makes you... Oh, man.

Maybe it is Katy Perry. I thought Kanye had a song that was like, Working better, better, stronger, weaker. You know what I'm talking about? And then he made that up. What doesn't make you stronger, which means anything in life you go through with struggles just makes you a stronger person.

Yeah. Wasn't invented until 2008 from Kanye West. You think he knew he was quoting Nietzsche when he wrote that song? Yeah. I think he's, Kanye could be a philosopher, right? He's kind of this out... thought,

kind of crazy things. You know, out on his own, like there's his own thing. Ask him what this table is, dude. Yeah. See what he's got. And then it would be like, this table is nothing. But do they ever just go, it's a table? Yeah. It is a table these philosophers

have do they call talkspace.com and go talk to a therapist and they go i know i know uh frank but it's a table and we're sitting here with it right and you need to wrap your head around that he goes but what's what's our head But if you saw a bunch of different furniture, you could group all the tables together, right? Even though they all look differently. Yeah. So it's like, what is tableness then? It's a bunch of them all together.

I know, but what are the similarities between all the tables? How do you know they're all the same kind of thing? I think because of their purpose it's interesting it's not that's a good point dude yeah i don't have alone his world i would love to see you go toe-to-toe with aristotle yeah i get not to his purpose you idiot now go to bed turn blow your candle out and then there goes just barely lighting him up on his side it's not like a candle's a big light air, Ari

I've been trying to get some sleep Ari, Stottle Stove the big stoster Stody hit the sack what was i gonna say oh i thought about i remember i was trying to do this as a joke

maybe it ever comes a joke but we had easter yesterday so the easter bunny uh came and then we were i remember one time trying to find uh something hide something and someone by i think my parents said look behind a chair and i remember being 12 years old and i thought about chair so much that i forgot what a chair was and so i couldn't i was like looking behind like a like the lamp table and almost everything but a chair because i like almost thought about that word too much and then i couldn And then I kind of forgot what it was. I was like, what is it? I don't even know what this thing is. And you can't just ask what a chair is.

That's a great question. You told me a philosophy one time. I think it's a philosophy. You can tell me. When you were having claustrophobia and we were getting on a plane, and then you said you could start thinking about tight spaces, and then your mind kept leading you to the whole world is a tight space. Oh, I get claustrophobic in the world, in the universe.

I can make myself get to that point. Isn't that kind of philosophy? Or is that just crazy? That just sounds like a problem. I mean, I guess, I don't know. Yeah, well, you're the... All right. I can...

With claustrophobia, you could say, if I'm on this plane, right? Yeah. It's no control. I can't leave this thing right now. I want to leave right now. I can't. Yeah.

I can't leave that. And so when I do get off the plane, what if I'm like, I don't want to be around... I don't want to be in this room. I don't want to be in this neighborhood. I don't want to be... It can technically keep going.

I can only go so far. So it's fact that like there's a limit to it so i there's i can't get to space i mean you know it's like so it's like earth could feel like i don't want to be here which i'm borderline probably why you should call i mean this is's like you can now i tell myself i then if i do start feeling too much of that i can say well i can go run to california and it's like that almost like calms it down because you're like that's so far yeah but i could run to california but i mean but then you're essentially trapped on america i can't get to another, there's the ocean, like you can't. And then you're on a boat. Now I'm really trapped in this boat. Like there's, you

could technically have yourself, all you are is kind of trapped everywhere you go. You're just, whatever you're in is trapped. I mean, dude, it's a tough way to look at the world, man. I just go from cage to cage, living life. But it's, yeah, you don't understand what me and Aristotle...

You're just not deep enough, Aaron. Yeah, you're not deep enough that you can... That would be essentially the table talk. Maybe I'm the next modern, modern, modern philosopher. Father of modern, modern philosophy. Because apparently you can just keep doing that forever. Because that's what we're learning today. Everybody's the father.

Everybody goes, so this guy, what did he do? And then you just make up a... He was the father of epistemology. I need one quote. Yeah. I just need one quote. Come up with it right now. A quote?

Mm-hmm. End all be... Doing Latin. Yeah. Doing Latin. Well, your jokes are quotes. Bum-ba- are quotes you've had some wise you have had some wise ones i think i mean we're getting off topic here but your joke about peanut allergies there's so many comedians that have had jokes making fun of kids with peanut allergies it's

an easy target but you wisely took it the other direction and i think that's a good way to look at it in comedy yeah because essentially right you're attacking kids for something that's not their fault exactly so yeah to just have an angle that nobody else is taking yeah and a more positive one and then the broad i've heard you talk about just using words that nobody else is using or saying things in a way no words but saying things in a way that other people i don't think if you talk if you don't talk like regular people then that's a problem especially with what we do i notice when comics use big words on stage yeah and you i just go i have found a hard time believe that in your normal conversation if i'm trying to just talk to

you and be your like when i'm on stage my job is to you're supposed to be very relatable yeah my job is to be like it's just us hanging out in a room or you're watching a special just it's like that's what people like about this podcast it feels like they're a part of it they feel like they're in the room with us yeah because we're using words the words are all that matter that's all that us saying this stuff words are all that matter there it is, dude. Writing down my pins out of ink. Got it. Words are all that matter. Did you guys get this? Words are all that matter. But I've heard you say that because you're clean,

that forces you to use words that a dirty comedian, or the guy that curses, they're actually using fewer words than you would use because you have to use different words. Now, I started saying so and like. So is kind of like, I don't think bad, but I'll say like. And like is something that you can, it's a rhythm of how you talk and how you say it. And, you know, when you're telling these stories on stage, there's a song kind of to it.

Like there's, you know, you're kind of going through it. It's pretty fun. The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step. Who said that? Mark Twain? I think my uncle. Frank? Frank Bargatze?

Frank Bargatze. I keep on Frank Bargatzi saying that all the time. You tell me, who wrote that down there? Lao Tzu, who's attributed to, but it was really Frank Bargetzi. Yeah.

Lao Tzu? I think, I don't know. That's probably not even close how you say it. I've never heard of that guy. Oh. How do you spell it? How do you spell it?

Go ahead. That's a lot. But does that... It's a Lao Tzu way to say Lao Tzu. That's a Lao Tzu pronunciation. That's the Lao Tzu-iest way i've ever heard anyone say his name i think that just means if you want to lose 100 pounds you got to start with one pound right just right gotta get going but if you want to start with one pound you first have to lose half a pound here we go and then if you

want to lose half of that therefore it is impossible to lose weight as we've seen sugar's back in and we're not doing it it ain't how hard you hit it's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward Yogi Berra Rocky Balboa you guys both jumped on that though I thought I was gonna make y'all think it was Aristotle I think the ain't kind of gave it away it wasn't an ancient

Greek if the kitchen ain't working I gave it away. It wasn't an ancient Greek philosophy. If the kitchen ain't working out, I don't know what some old saying is like. If there fire ain't in the kitchen, don't come cooking. Who knows what he's saying. The fact that I didn't even notice that probably shows. Ain't.

Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you imagined. Ain't ain't a word and I ain't gonna use it. What is our ain't thing we always say? On the air? I heard that growing up. Ain't ain't a word and I ain't gonna use it. Oh, I said something one time that ain't gonna do it.

Ain't gonna do it. Or something like that. It wasn't as good the second time. You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. Michael Scott, Wayne Gretzky. That is Wayne Gretzky? It's Wayne Gretzky. That's a good one.

You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. It's great, but it's also not true. Why? Because you don't miss them because you didn't take the shot. So it's not great then. But then you didn't do anything in life. So what if he's going, well, I'm literally talking about hockey. Probably was.

And you guys take it on. You guys made this into a bigger thing. It's a big thing to go like, you know, I'm not talking about McDonald's. Like if you don't take all your shots. And he's like, I was talking about shooting. Someone asked me, what about shooting a shot? And he goes, if you don't mean 100% of the shots, you miss them. I don't know.

He was on a roll for a while. That's next after words are all that matter. Words are all that matter. That's how we communicate with each other. That is true. That's a great point. The harder you work, the more luck you have. The harder you work, the more luck you have, yeah.

That's an opportunity thing, too, is kind of put yourself, you're ready for this opportunity. Yeah. So you make yourself good enough to be ready for when the opportunity comes, you go, yeah, I'm ready for this. Yeah. I always remember one, Mike Vecchione would always say that always stuck with me,

like comedy ones, was you got to get the no's out of the way. And Vecchione told me that, and I've always, I've basically lived by that. You get told no. I've always I've basically lived by that yeah you get told no I've been told no I mean we talked about I think this before but I mean how many no's I get told

is so many you only hear about the yes's and that goes all the way back to barking when you're just trying to get inside yeah yeah

I always try yeah you have yeah goals I don't have I don't have a catchy you know.

Words matter. Yeah, words matter. You know. I can't put that. All words matter. Everybody's like, oh, God. We end up just going down a dark road. We're just having fun on there.

All words. Well, see. You just can't. All words matter. They're going to do that and show the what do we make fun of in the Middle Ages? I don't know.

Rolling the farter? No. Let's see. You know what the happiest animal Rolling the farter? No. Oh. Let's see. You know what the happiest animal in the world is? It's a goldfish. It's got a 10-second memory. Be a goldfish. Wow.

We don't. Was that Ted Lasso? That was Ted Lasso. What? Is that really? Yeah. You're about to rip it. You're like, oh, that's so stupid.

That's great. Oh, man. And I would have been wrong, because that's's a great that's the philosopher of this podcast is ted lasso the father of podcast philosophy yeah exactly i'll do one more would i rather be feared or loved easy both i want people to be afraid of how much they love me. Michael Scott. Michael Scott, that's great. That's a great quote.

All right. All right. We're going to wrap it up with a couple of philosophical questions. Here's one. If freedom is simply being able to do what you want, are animals freer than humans? All right. Hold on.

I'm going to get my stuff. What is it now? Say it again. If freedom is simply being able to do what you want, are animals freer than humans? Assuming you believe in free will, which a lot of people don't. Yeah.

So animals would be freer. They're in the wild, right? Because they don't. Yeah. Yeah. So animals would be freer. In the wild, right? Because they don't have any laws to live by. But they have to watch out for getting eaten by another animal. So I would say not every animal, right? Is that not it? Yeah.

That's a great answer, I think. Free to die, I guess. Better than the answer I have. What was your answer? I didn't have one. He just rambled on like most philosophers do. Until someone goes, oh, that's good. What is an animal, dude? Let's dig down.

That's just an answer that goes, I know, but we've got to go. We've got to get out of here. I have a reservation at 7 o'clock. What's a reservation? I heard a clip from an old podcast where you were like, listen, this is interesting, but I mean, people are listening. On here?

Yeah, on this one episode a while ago. Like two weeks ago, right? Yeah, I think so. It was the old west or something. There's my quote. This is interesting, but people are listening. It might have been the Middle Ages. I don't remember.

Are animals more freer than us? That's the question. Because they can do whatever they want. Yeah, probably. Because the hyenas run around in Africa. They can do whatever they want. He doesn't have to wear a mask. He doesn't have to wear a mask.

He doesn't have to get a job. And they just have to hunt their food. But they have to go get their food. But yeah, they don't have to get a job and they just have to hunt their their food but they have to go get their food you know but yeah they don't have the problems with you know they don't start a podcast but do they actually have freedom though they don't have they don't have rational minds they're just reacting to stimuli and just they're like machines dude you know yeah does the machine have freedom no uh yeah because it needs but no that's so confidently a machine doesn't machine has to be turned on by a human right an animal doesn't have to rely on someone else to get going they have to catch food they have to

but like they're you know they they can go like they're not having to be you know i don't as a human you could be if you learned how to live off the grid those people are probably freer than animals sure we might not be freer than animals if those people are they're all good points yeah at least bring something to this table this guy's a philosopher all, we'll do one more. Yeah, this table. Would the world be a better place or a worse place if everyone looked the same?

Well, you would think worse because it's like this. You tell it doesn't, you know, it's the, everybody's unique and that's what's so great. If we were not unique, I don't think it would, it's the, everybody's unique and that's what's so great. If we were not unique,

I don't think it would be. No one's a lot of problems. I think it would take love out of the, out of the, out of the whatever. See, I don't know the words, but what's the,

not the. Equation? Yeah, equation. I was going to say. So you love Laura just because of the looks? Yeah.

But I think if it was the same, what would, what would you love lord just because the looks yeah but i think if it was the same where would what would you love like you have to love the actual person this is just looking the same not we're not all like he just said look the same yeah but i mean love not like i guess not dating but i mean like we would just be like murder would probably not matter like if you're everything would be disincentives like i don't know if you don't see different if you see everybody's the same if the same thing gets taken away from you and there's a thousand of the same thing and you look oh there's a thousand more of the exact same thing you would not miss stuff because you'd be like you're not seeing different people like Like it feels, it's just a sea of the same people. Yeah.

Does that make sense? Yeah, I think so. I wouldn't personalize it as much. Yeah, if you're, it's, it doesn't, they're all, if everybody looked, if it was a thousand yous, what does it matter if you exist if I have a thousand you there? But I'm, but I'm not just unique because the way i look i think differently i have a unique identity that person out you better be wearing a fun rainbow pin or something before you get mowed down is the is the argument that if everybody looked the same then you'd you'd differentiate people based on what they believe and how they think and you know i mean the content of the character you'd have an army of like it would just be a nightmare

it would be you would not i mean well what do we all look like that's a better question they all look like how many personalities you know when you see worse than how many people's personalities do you actually really get to see no nobody's people's personality outside of your like people that you know immediately yeah i would think we would be under so much control for some reason. Some reason I feel that's an army. That's like, we're just.

You think if the three of us came in looking the exact same one day, they'd be able to tell who we were? I think when they would laugh, they would know it's me. And then when they would obviously. Would my face still look worried? Yeah.

Would I look exactly the same except a worried face? When they could feel that, they go, but that guy feels like he's worried. I'm not going to guess something right, so I bet that's Brian. And then you're sitting up there with your hat on and a jacket. And then everybody's like, well, that's obviously Aaron. I'm like, he's got his NASCAR jacket on. I mean, pink ones all look the same, right? Yeah. obviously Aaron, like he's got his NASCAR jacket on. And that's,

I mean, pink ones all look the same, right? Yeah. And they don't, they make for life. Yeah. But they're not doing great, man.

Yeah. There's, it's not, doesn't look that fun. You gotta wear a suit every day. Being a penguin. I feel like throughout history, a lot of the problems we've had is because people look different.

I agree. Yeah. Our religion, probably a big part. Yeah. All words matter, dude. It's just because we all look different. I think believing in different gods, I think, caused a bit of a tiff out in the tilt. But yeah, I'm sure it's because we all look different.

That's what... I mean, core beliefs are the reason countries, the worlds are fighting. And yeah, yeah. But that group's taller than the other group. And we'll write that down for a quote. We'll write that down for a quote. We're done so he can still laugh.

Yeah. He'll be, it's going to start the next podcast. So I guess. Did we do a lot, enough time? We did a lot. I feel like we covered thousands of years of intellectual thought. So yeah,

I mean, I can keep going. What are we at? About hour 40? Oh, yeah. Hour 37? Yeah. I don't know. I mean, now that I stopped it like this, is there another good one to get off on?

Whether you think you can or you think you can't, you're right. So, no. Yes. The answer is no. Now we're done. Whether you think you can. What? Or you think you can't.

Either way, you're going to be right. It's basically saying you've got to have confidence. Oh, I thought it would be like a loser says, well, why don't you do it? Well, I either can do it or I can't do it, but either way, I'm going to be right. All right, well, then sit here, dude. Then sit here. That's what, who's quoted that? Was that a teenager living with his mom?

Who was that? A 40-year-old in the basement of his mom's house? Do you have that attributed to anybody? Yeah, Henry Ford. What did he ever do? Here's one from Confucius. That sounds like a quote from a guy that would be like, what'd you do? I built

trucks. You're like, okay, that makes sense. Yeah, that quote does make sense. You want one from Confucius? Yeah. Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall. That's kind of like

the Rocky Balboa. Yeah. See, but I always think with the, I guess it is like the philosophy of it. To me, it's like always like these words

to like, I think like, I like, it's like, what does that matter? Like, you still got to go do stuff. You still got to like,

actually, as a person, go, you could go change someone's life. I think people get very behind their words does that matter like you still got to go do stuff you still got to like actually as a person go you could go change someone's life i think people get very behind their words and they think i did this good i if you're uh aristotle i get if you're these think guys that are the smartest people alive yeah i've ever lived but then i think we got a problem now where i think everybody thinks all it is about is coming up with the best way to say something, and then they go, there you go. And so it's a bunch of that.

Even if it's not profound at all, just the catchiest way to say it. It's just the catchiest way to say it, and someone goes, wow, that's a great point. And then they go, this is back to my golf thing. And then they go, well, that is a great point. That's a great point. None of them live by these. Just give us the wrap-up.

That's my microwave. Making a snack. Aaron lands. I think they're taking calls now, if I'm not mistaken. Caleb on line one. But everybody just says all this stuff to each other, and no one actually does anything. So if you just keep going like, wow, that's clever, that's clever, that's good.

But you're not actually actually physically changing someone then nothing changes yeah and so like who cares if it's that guy saying it and we're doing it to that point but i mean you look at twitter all twitter is is just people trying to say clever things yeah and it's essentially like all of these kind of like you know everybody's a philosopher on twitter and but they don't actually do anything because they think well i did do something i wrote a i wrote a some a sentence together that's that's pretty fun yeah but words are all that matter but it is true it is words are all that matter so that goes against even my thing and that's what's the hard part about words all that matter is you can uh really get through it pretty quickly.

But if you want to use words are all that matter as your slogan, when someone says that, does it make sense? You go, but does it? You always just question, do the table nonsense that Aaron was doing. You get real philosophy on them and just go, oh, ask me. Words are all that matter. Try to demunk it. I'll just give you an example. Words are all that matter? You get real philosophy on them and just go, oh, ask me. Words are all that matter. Try to demuck it.

I'll just give you an example. Words are all that matter? Words are all that matter. Like you. Okay, so you're presenting that as words are all that matter? Words are all that. I walk into a party, dinner party, words are all that matter. I'm doing it. How do you know that?

Because I know that. How do you not know that? Yeah, you idiot. Nothing else matters? Nothing else. Words are all that matter you not know that? Yeah, you idiot. Nothing else matters? Nothing else. Words are all that matter. Oh, yeah? Yeah.

So all you do, you don't do anything other than words? The words are the things that I'm doing. You just worded the sentence differently. I mean, that's all these guys have been doing all day. Is they word, what is a table? You're just saying, well, I don't know. What is a table? Like, if you don't think about it.

I think he stopped you. It's bulletproof. You can't get through it. Words are all that matter. Okay. I agree. Thank you. Thank you.

Now, me and my wife would like you to leave. All right. Now, me and my wife would like you to leave. Sorry, I have COVID, everybody. Last joke. I got one more that Aaron submitted. Oh, wow. This is from Emmanuel. First time caller, long time listener. Emmanuel Kant.

Yeah. If everyone in the world did exactly what you did what kind of world would that be would it be a desirable world to live in yeah this is like the categorical imperative how do you decide if something's right or wrong yeah like you have to imagine if everybody in the world did that thing that's how you know if something's right or wrong oh okay yeah see well why didn't she just say it like that Yeah what's her problem Yeah

Is that That guy Did you say Emanuel A lot of lady names Why did Eleanor Roosevelt say that I mean I'm sorry Reneenee emmanuel janet i thought i'm sorry i misread the situation is there a janet philosopher not that i know of there should be

what's the answer by the way way? What do you mean? Well, it depends on what you do. If I punch you in the face, do I want everybody in the world just going around punching everybody in the face? Oh, everybody or Brian? Oh, everybody punching Brian? That's different.

Now we get a more or something. Yeah, you don't want everybody punching you in the face. I know, but that's like, okay. All right. All right. That's it. Philosophy.

We did it. We did it. Y'all are going to see the title of this one and be like, yeah, bud. Here we go. Here we go. Next week is the Nate Land live podcast. So we will put out, we will have a regular podcast, and then we will record the live one.

But next week, we do it. Which we'll talk about it next week. Yeah. All right. Thank you, everybody. What are y'all doing? Me and Brian are at Stardome this weekend. Yeah.

And you're doing... I'm at the Grand Ole Opry this weekend on the 10th. Yeah. April 10th. Yeah. And then... And then my club dates are going Miami Improv. Could use some help

down there. It's a fun... It's a tough market to get into. Yeah. All right. See you next week. Bye.

Thanks, everybody, for listening to the Nate Land Podcast. Be sure to subscribe to our show on iTunes, Spotify, you know, wherever you listen to your podcasts. And please remember to leave us a rating on our comment. Nate Land is produced by me, Nate Bargetzi, and my wife, Laura, on the All Things Comedy Network. Recording and editing for the show is done by Genovation's consulting in partnership with Center Street Media. Thanks for tuning in.

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