The Nateland Podcast - #51 Christian Comedy ft. John Crist
Episode Date: June 16, 2021This episode, we're joined by comedian John Crist to discuss standup comedy from a Christian perspective. We delve into his past controversies, discuss how Christian comedy has changed over the years,... and rekindle the controversy of if it's ever okay to say the phrase "Let's Go!"  Co-hosts: Brian Bates ( https://www.instagram.com/brianbatescomic) & Aaron Weber ( https://www.instagram.com/realaaronweber)  Podcast produced by Nate & Laura Bargatze Recording & Editing by Genovations Media https://www.natebargatze.com https://www.allthingscomedy.com https://www.genovationsmedia.com Email - Nateland@NateBargatze.com   Right now Allform is offering 20% off all orders for our listeners at ALLFORM.COM/NATE.    Thats 20% off all orders at ALLFORM.COM/NATE.  https://allform.com/nate   Get yourself some of the most comfortable and versatile clothing on the planet at VUORI.COM/NATE  Not only will you receive 20% off your first purchase, but enjoy free shipping on any U.S. orders over $75. More on that later!  https://vuoriclothing.com/nate
Transcript
Discussion (0)
hello folks i remembered uh thank you everybody hello folks i said it again i had a couple hello
folks uh in naples yeah shout outs from crowd, but then also just out and about.
I met some cool people out by the pool.
Took a picture with them.
I was like, let me get my shirt on, please, before we take a picture.
But it was very, very fun.
Also, we wanted to show these things we got sent in from Adam Anderson.
He sent us some stickers in.
He's a branding designer.
He works at home.
He's been listening to the podcast.
Once he finishes all the episodes, he starts over with episode one and repeats.
He is on his third run through.
Wow.
He's on episode 28, The Calendars.
We need to find out which ones he skips so we know what to.
Yeah.
We could find out.
That's how you can find out, too, to make something better.
You could be like, all right, you've gone through them three times.
Like, where do you find yourself?
Like, you know, you go back through the Sopranos.
Yeah.
I always kind of go through the, what is it?
The wife scenes and stuff.
The wife's, the.
Oh, the Dr. Melfi, the psychiatrist.
Psychiatrist.
I tend to, you kind of go, all right.
Right.
Let's get through that.
Like, you know, you always, there's episodes that you.
You just know a storyline's coming up and you're like, I don't feel like watching.
Yeah.
It's a lot.
So then you're like, I just want to see that, the mafia stuff.
Yeah.
I was thinking that's a good way to, you know, if you made a show, you'd be like, what am I going to – what do I not care about?
I think about that in my act sometimes.
Like what do I – here's a joke I don't care about.
So why – well, why do I not care about it?
I need to figure out how to make it better or make it different
or quit doing it.
One way or the other.
But he made his Midwest Bigfoot Club stickers for all three of us.
A golf Nebraska sticker for Nate.
Tornado watch sticker for Aaron's computer.
Aaron has zero fear of tornadoes.
Grilling sticker for Brian Barbecue Baits.
And a Unibuff sticker for Harper.
He has an eight-year-old
daughter as well.
It's a buffalo
with a unicorn
and then
with a unicorn horn.
I bet everybody got it
when I said Unibuff.
And one cow tipping sticker
for whoever wants it.
Same way you talk about
cow tipping
when we talk about
the state of Nebraska,
which we need to do
the state of Nebraska.
We'll get Larry K.
We got.
It'd be a good one.
Yeah, great.
Nebraska.
When we do Alaska, we have this guy just back in town.
Yeah, man.
From Alaska.
Yeah.
Married now.
Yeah.
Went on your honeymoon.
All the fun stuff's over, and now it's down to get to the nit and gritty.
Yeah.
You know?
Yeah, I'd heard that expression my whole life.
You know, the honeymoon is over, the honeymoon period. But it really is like you get home, and you're like, all right, the nit and gritty yeah you know yeah i'd heard that expression my whole life you know the
honeymoon is over the honeymoon period but it really is like you get home and you're like all
right now what yeah now we're just married yeah now we just live our lives you know yeah it's
tougher to get out of and uh i think the honeymoon period lasts longer than the honeymoon yeah it's
it's like the first year.
Yeah.
And then you really start seeing it.
And every time you go home, you're like, oh, you're here every time.
Yeah.
You know?
Yeah.
Stuff like that.
I went on the road with you as soon as we got home that night
and we hit the road the next morning.
From your honeymoon?
Uh-huh.
Yes.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Very quick. Yeah. It's the life of a comic everything all holidays anything that matters you always you're working yeah
almost i'm lucky that uh harper's birthday hers is coming up uh uh but uh hers is summer
so it's like you usually comics like, like the funny thing is comics,
we don't tour as much in the summer.
We're more fall, winter, you know, that kind of thing.
Late summer, maybe you do some, but it's definitely the slowdown period.
Remember, comedy clubs are still open, but usually that's –
when you get on a big tour, that's usually how it is.
So I'm usually – like I i've always and she's july so she's near fourth of july so i'm always like kind of just block that whole
those two weeks off and then yeah it makes it nice and easy uh but yeah my wife's birthday
my birthday i work i worked on my birthday. I was in somewhere.
I don't know where.
They gave me some stuff.
It was very nice.
Valentine's Day is like a big comedy night.
I don't think Lucy and I have spent a Valentine's Day together ever.
No.
Valentine's Day is a huge night.
Appleton, Wisconsin is where it was.
New Year's Eve is a big one. Yep yep but you timed that one where you did you got to watch the ball drop because you were at caroline's how's the best thing about
man caroline's i always tell people if they want to go watch the ball drop caroline's was a great
place to go do it because you would you get to watch a show and then you just walk upstairs when
the ball drops and you walk out on time square you watch it drop and then we just walk upstairs when the ball drops, and you walk out on Times Square, you watch it drop,
and then we would go right back down to Caroline's.
And so it'd be cold outside, but you'd be outside for, I mean,
like maybe five minutes total.
Right, just to see it.
Just to see it.
So you go out there maybe a minute or two before, maybe two minutes.
It's timed out where you're really – it's so close that it's like,
shouldn't we be going?
Like it's 1156.
And they're like, yeah, we're about to go.
And everybody's kind of like loose about when you're going to go out there.
But then you just walk right up, walk right out, see it, go right back in.
A lot of clubs, you celebrate New Year's on stage.
They purposely timed it in between shows.
Or was there another show after that? No, no. You were done. You were done. Oh, that's on stage. They purposely timed it in between shows? Or was there another show after that?
No, no.
You were done.
You were done.
Oh, that's even better.
But like people
and they
and the people
that buy tickets
for that show
then they have like
I think they
move the stage
and they can dance
and you know
it's like a
kind of a party
after that
but you do the show
up to that.
And it was great
because Caroline's would
you know it'd be like
me, Vecchione, Soder like they'd get all of us that are very close and then we would all get
to hang out with each other and then just do a show that's awesome yeah it was great uh i always
tell people if you go to want to see the ball drop go do something like that go buy it don't
just you go out there and stain in those it's like cages yeah you're just stuck up
there forever it's like go you know i mean look you go and that's that's the free way to do it
because if you're young you don't what do you care like you might it's fun for you to go do that
but once you get older it's like yeah go pick go find something buy some tickets and
if that's like your thing if that's what you want to go do.
Yeah.
You know?
All right.
Did we have anything?
Oh, you know what I was going to talk about?
Random.
I've been watching.
There's a show on Netflix called Startup.
Have you ever seen that?
I've heard of it.
It's great.
Unbelievable.
I went through it, and it's just like I was even trying to describe it,
like Breaking Bad, but cryptocurrency and stuff like that. I don't know. It's just, it's like, I was even trying to describe it like Breaking Bad, but cryptocurrency and stuff like that.
I don't know.
It's really great.
But then I started watching, did you ever watch Manifest?
No, I've heard of it.
It was on NBC.
I've only watched the episodes.
I think I'm over it.
I tried.
And it was, it's this plane.
It's like an idea.
It was like that show that they had where the dome show.
Remember there was, who wrote it?
Who's the?
Stephen King.
Stephen King.
It feels like that kind of, where sometimes those, like the idea,
the hook is unbelievable.
And you're like, I got to see it.
Then you watch it and you're like, I don't know.
Yeah.
And I thought Stephen King did the dome one where it's like they're all in this dome.
That does ring a bell, like a CBS show.
Yeah, and you're like, why are they in that dome?
And then you start watching it and then you're like,
I don't even care why they're in the dome anymore.
Is it called Under the Dome?
Under the Dome, yeah.
And it's funny because you, it is, like you end up going to, it's funny to be like, you're like, why are they in the dome yeah and it's funny because you it is like you end up going to it's funny to be like
you're you want you're like why are they in the dome and then after a couple episodes you're like
i don't care and i hope they have to stay and you don't and then you stop watching
well you're right because they got canceled pretty quick yeah it's just no one you know
and uh but manifest as they're watching it so it's they
they're on the i mean this was in the commercials i've only seen two episodes i can't ruin it for
but they uh they're on a plane they when they take off when they land it's been five years and
they thought they and everybody thought everybody was dead on that plane and so they're back alive
they all look the same and so they come back and so then you know they set them down
they're like guys it's you guys took off in 2013 it's now 2018 and no one knows like where these
people are or where they've been everybody's kind of moved on with their life and like uh
and so that stuff is like awesome were they traveling faster than the speed of light or
something and that's why no i don't i don't we we haven't got to. I don't know why or what.
I'm sure it's going to be some magical.
Sounds a little bit like Lost.
Yeah, I never watched Lost, but that was like a plane crash, right?
It involved a plane.
Yeah, I've never seen Lost.
Are you going to ruin it for me?
No.
Oh.
But there's still some magic, some weird stuff.
Yeah.
I'm going to go watch Lost. You give up on the west wing man oh yeah i forgot uh i forgot about it uh that's all right same thing
it's like were they in the white house the whole time yes oh god oh good no most expensive pilot
ever made yeah just the set they just recreated the whole white house so it was
that's pretty expensive yeah well showed it uh so manifest so they uh you know this one girl in it
she's got a boyfriend right fiance yeah so she's been gone five years and so when they all come
back you'd imagine the families are pretty blown away that these people, they thought they were dead. They had funerals.
They did everything.
And now they're all back alive.
And the dad comes back.
Their mom died.
And she's like, you know, because all these people were like,
I took a normal flight.
They've only been gone for three hours.
But everybody else has been five years.
And he comes back, and the fiance's name
is jared and the she's like where's jared he goes he had something come up at work and you're like
what could come up they've been dead for five like this is what i'm about to start checking out
because it was like and it was early in the show you've been gone for five years and we think you're dead you show up magically
now alive but i'm pretty slammed at work to go see you yeah that doesn't even you know i'll catch up
with you later dude yeah and i'll see i mean she's back now right like he didn't even and i was like
all right dude i'm i can't do and then uh there was like another there was something else i forget
that is a really interesting premise, though.
I get it.
I'd be hooked to see how that-
Especially when you think about that Malaysian flight that disappeared
and we never found the plane.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's crazy.
Those, yeah.
But it's like if you want to write that, you can't have a guy not show up.
It would change Earth and the world.
It's like us
figuring out aliens.
It just would be different
to be like,
these people are gone
for five years
and now they're not.
We don't know what happened.
They're magic.
Something's out there.
And then you'd be like,
I just,
I'll hit her up
when she gets here.
So ridiculous.
Yeah.
In the movie Castaway,
when Helen Hunt
gets the call that tom hanks is
alive she passes out she faints right there yeah that's realistic that's realistic like that's
that's what has to happen yeah exactly yeah you gotta pass out instead of like oh that's cool man
i'm just today's today's not the day for this to happen uh any other day i would have been down there
but today is just not the and she went to see him yeah she eventually has to go chase it hey
how you doing uh apparently something happened and i'm back and he's like i have been meaning to
hit you up uh i mean he was already remarried and stuff so i guess maybe there's uh she was
she was already no he no it was a no she's the one that just reappeared reappear oh okay okay
but it it still doesn't matter yeah it doesn't you you override yeah everything and uh you know
so it's like showing some of their relationship all right you know i thought of that last night
uh there was another thing in it that i thought of, and I can't remember.
That was very early.
I started just, like, kind of fast-forwarding it, where I'm like,
let me just see the gist of it.
One, this kid has cancer, and so a girl on the plane, like,
made this thing to help kids with cancer, and, like,
their survival rate is, like, almost 100%.
And so they're
like oh let's put this kid on it and he they're the doctors they have to vote on it which is kind
of crazy if these that's gotta be a tough job as a doctor where you you're kind of playing god
in the fact that you're like we can't see everybody so who do we see yeah and they the doctor goes uh
she's he's talking to the person that was on the plane, the girl, the woman that figured out this new way to solve this.
And they look at his case, and he's like, well, I mean, it's been six years.
He's actually too old for it.
And they go, yeah, but we were on that plane that just came back.
And they're like, well, we can't.
We got a protocol.
And he goes, man, sorry.
And you're like, well, that's-
What can you do?
Yeah, he's like, well, I mean, it was funny.
They're bending the rules.
They're going like, well, we're up for some money.
He's like, we're going to be bought by Big Pharma,
so we can't be cheating the system.
And you go, there's no system anymore.
These people showed up out of midair.
They were dead.
So how about you do go help that kid?
If anybody got a raw deal, maybe it's that kid.
That he missed it.
He missed his chance because he magically disappeared for five years.
And he's like, ah, well, rules are rules.
You know?
I mean, it really felt like no one really cared that they came back.
That was the thing.
Like, everybody's just kind of like, that's crazy, man.
That's what the show's about.
That's how nobody cares about them.
Everybody's like, well, you've been gone for five years.
Like, what do I care about?
Like, you know.
All right.
Will Riddle.
Hello, folks.
When I saw the topic for today, it was nothing.
I honestly thought this is about to be the best episode to date,
and I was right.
Listening to y'all go back and forth about squirrels, wet pants, and wedding guests was hilarious.
Thanks for all you guys do.
Keep it coming.
Thank you, Will.
Will Riddle.
That's a fun name.
That's a good name.
Chris.
We got some great pictures of Brian.
Some great drawings, by the way, of Brian.
Oh, yeah?
And shooting the squirrel with the hat.
Do you have them?
I probably should have. Oh, man. I i don't bring that up good night so you guys just seen the wedding
ring i got oh yeah let's see it i didn't wear it today uh but i had it i have it it was a nice one
um chris nicholas manifest yeah i mean that's you are this is my this podcast is a manifest
to me chris nicholas i don't think y'all care ever when i saw this episode was about nothing
i thought this must be a rerun felt like it you know yeah jeremy huh that's funny yeah it's funny
uh jeremy hoffman i was wondering whether choosing nothing as the topic would be a mistake.
We got our answer except about one minute in when Nate uttered the sentence, khakis are fun.
Is this the level of excitement we should expect now that all three of you are married?
That is, yeah.
That is true.
That's marriage.
You come down, you know, like old school.
Pretty big day. Bed, bath, and know, like old school. Pretty big day.
Bed, bath, and where does he say?
Home Depot.
Yeah.
All the stuff.
Taz Harrell, or Harold.
When Aaron mentioned he knew someone who went to a theme park
and ate lunch there every day,
Nate said that makes unbelievable sense to do that.
I would say it's unbelievable how little sense that statement makes.
How can someone make sense and be unbelievable?
The only thing that made sense about the statement was that Nate said it.
This podcast makes unbelievable sense.
Love the show, guys.
There's a nice little tagline.
Yeah, unbelievable.
Unbelievable sense podcast.
It makes unbelievable sense.
Well, that doesn't make sense.
Exactly.
Connor Lagrange or Lagrang.
Lagrange?
That's what I...
Lagrange is what you would say?
Yeah.
Glad Nate said, it's like that bird movie by Alfred Hitchcock
when the name of the film is, in fact, The Birds.
Hitchcock when the name of the film is, in fact, The Birds.
Jeremy Hoffman, is he double?
Oh, wow.
Doubling up.
Whoa, Jeremy Hoffman, the first double comment.
I didn't catch that.
Wow.
Unless I messed up.
He's putting out good comments, I guess. Putting out good good comments Man, is this the first double?
Yep
That I can remember
Way to go Jeremy
I think Bald Eagle is wrong about
Why did I put him on there?
Bald Eagle is a great one
Bald Eagle
That's so good Because you kind of look like Bald Eagle's a great one. Bald Eagle. Yeah.
I mean, that's so good.
Because you kind of look like, you know,
like an older one that doesn't come down to the ground as much anymore.
You know, he goes, he really has to think about his moves.
He doesn't't you know
he's looking
he's hunting for food
I think I saw a mouse
down there
you think
let me know when it's down there
for sure
I'd like some confirmation
I don't have
I don't have
that many
flaps left in me
I think
I think
Bald Eagle is wrong about Tony Gwynn being the player most associated with the
team. Cal Ripken Jr. is probably more of a legend than him, and he played 21 seasons at the Orioles.
Also, the Padres currently have one of the best players in baseball, Fernando Tatis Jr.
Tatis?
Tatis Jr., and I don't know if I could name a player on the orioles if my life
depended on it so ripken stands out more i agree with that i i don't i mean i like jeremy on the
podcast he i mean that's a good one that's a good one i still think if you just say name a legend
san diego padres legend that 99 of 100 are going to say. Yeah.
Well, he's not saying. I think you reframed the question a little bit there.
Yeah, yeah.
That helps out a lot.
A little Brian moving the goalpost base.
Yeah, that's what I said last time.
No.
I don't think you understood last time.
Apparently me and everybody.
Everyone else commented that you didn't understand what I was saying.
I mean, all right.
Yeah.
Then we shouldn't have even been talking about it
if that's,
I can name other
Orioles players.
Who's your best,
who's your favorite
Atlanta Braves?
I think it's got to be,
are you the most known?
I think Chipper Jones.
Yeah.
Like,
it's like,
if you're being that specific,
yes,
Tony Gwynn's
associated with the team
is the most,
but you said,
but you said
a person that's most
associated with a team is Tony Gwynn, where this guy's, that's but you said a person that's most associated with a team
is Tony Gwynn, where this guy's, that's what you said.
And Cal Ripken, I agree that Cal Ripken Jr. is,
I would think of him more, if I had to think of this,
I would think him and Baltimore, because he was 21 seasons,
longest, he never missed a game.
Like, you know, it was like when he broke the record, like people remember that. longest, he never missed a game.
It was like when he broke the record,
people remember that. Tony Gwynn,
it's like,
to me, I would think Derek Jeter and the Yankees.
Because it's like, you've got to think Chipper and the Braves, Jeter and the Yankees.
I mean, Jeter and the Yankees is probably even number one.
You don't think of any of those guys? No, I still don't think you understand
what I'm saying.
One player associated
with, like, when you say New York Yankees,
the first person you think of is Derek Jeter over Babe Ruth or Mickey Mantle.
Oh, okay.
So that's, okay.
I think I understand.
Even with the Braves, I would say there would be people throughout Del Murphy
or the Orioles.
I can name Brooks Robinson or Frank Robinson or Jim Palmer.
Who else are you going to name with the Orioles?
Who?
Brooks Robinson, Frank Robinson, two of the best players.
Eddie Murray.
No.
I guess this is for baseball fans.
You know, Eddie Murphy.
These are Hall of Famers.
Jeremy.
Bernie Mac, Eddie Murphy.
I don't know.
Who else?
Chris Rock.
I should have clarified for guys who follow sports.
Ray Romano.
You're like, what?
Kevin James.
I mean, the list goes on.
It doesn't.
You're trying to make it still fit for what it says.
Yeah, I am.
Everybody thinks of Cal Ripken in Baltimore.
No one thinks of those other two.
And like you said, Fernando Tatis.
I agree that he's one of the best young players,
but I still think more people percentage-wise would put Tony Gwynn with the Padres
than Cal Ripken with the Orioles.
I think they're pretty close.
I think they're pretty close. I think they're pretty close.
I don't know.
Yeah.
Maybe your age bracket would, but.
I played the same time.
You're, specifically you, 50-year-olds.
That's what I mean.
Okay.
Okay.
You know who I golfed with while I was gone?
Wally Joyner.
Really?
Yeah.
Who do you picture him with?
The Angels? Yeah. Yeah. Played for the Braves gone, Wally Joyner. Really? Yeah. Who do you picture him with? The Angels?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Played for the Braves, too.
And Kansas City.
Yeah.
He's a great dude.
Yeah.
Matt McCall.
I feel like every Nate Landon listener has one of those episodes that makes them ask
why.
When they first see the title, this is mine.
And we've moved to the Royal Family episode.
I didn't say that
because last time they made fun of that last time i said that they go they someone said i know
you're talking about something else because i would announce like all right now this is
for the royal family episode yeah i feel like that was i felt like that was needed though
it was needed that time okay well there was a comment about the title.
If you poke fun at me, then I'm going to.
Okay.
I don't remember that.
I'm going to adjust.
And I adjusted.
But I guess can't do that on this podcast.
Jake Peterson.
Aaron, guessing a popular 70s sitcom would have worldwide viewers.
Then I'll have more world. I just missed the word more.
It's like it didn't even exist.
Would have more worldwide viewers than Princess Diana's funeral is why I tune in every Wednesday.
Yeah, my whole life.
That's the mash reference.
That was the benchmark that everybody always said, the mash finale.
That was the benchmark that everybody always said, the MASH finale.
I understand.
I totally get why you think that.
Yeah.
Because for a while, it was the most viewed US TV show.
Right.
Other than the Super Bowls.
Yeah, I guess they're just talking about television shows and not worldwide televised events.
Yeah.
Yeah, I mean.
I feel like if they brought MASH mash back it could top it no uh princess
diana's funeral yeah when you hear them rephrase the next even the next time through you're like
yeah why did you say that i don't know i thought this is the royal Family episode too by the way I mean Chris Radcliffe
two hours of a guy
learning how not to stutter
great tagline
for the King's Speech
and Nate Land
some guy
wrote the King's Speech
I mean
blood sweat and tears
over it
just knock it down
in two seconds
he's like, God.
David Bill, episode eight on marriage.
Nate has never been more sure of anything in his life when he declares Oprah is the most famous person alive.
Fast forward to today and Nate spends four and a half minutes squabbling with Aaron and Benjamin Button about how there's no way Oprah's the most famous person alive.
Oh, I did? Do you remember that?
No. But...
I went back and looked at it. A lot's changed
since then. That's true.
We were talking about couples and how if one person's
really famous and the other person...
We were talking about Stedman and how that's just
going to be hard in a relationship.
You said it in jest.
Yeah, in that way.
She is one of the most famous people on Earth yeah for sure yeah yeah that is funny though uh
william joe hansen the queen is without a doubt the most famous person on earth she's on the
currency of 29 different countries okay a lot of people made that point, and I want to defend my position on that.
I don't think that means anything, being on the currency.
I feel like if Alexander Hamilton walked in here wearing modern clothing,
we wouldn't have a clue what he was wearing.
I agree. He has a Tony Gwynn jersey on and an Orioles hat.
You're like, golly.
And he's like, I kind of agree with both of them.
Who is this guy?
Yeah.
I don't think the queen's the most famous person in the world.
Yeah.
But.
I think she's super famous on paper and in the context of being a queen.
If you put her in normal clothes, dropped her to Kroger in middle Tennessee,
nobody would go, is that the queen?
I think someone would.
As a joke.
Yeah.
And the Kroger's got a lot of middle-aged moms in there that are.
But if she's not in the queen get up.
At an auto zone.
I don't think.
But if you take Shaq and put him in, everyone's going to know that that's Shaq.
Yeah.
So in that way, I think he's more famous.
Y'all ask a lot y'all do a lot of questions that
are like you know you are perfect for marriage it's like you're i feel like it's like talking
to two wives where you like kind of rephrase the question where you go that's not what you meant
and you go no no that's what uh that's what i'm saying though and then you can't even win the
argument because you you have some kind of you're shuffling. There's a lot of little
shuffling that goes like,
no, but your main point is not right. And then you go,
yeah, but you, let me make it
right. And then you go, what about this
and that? And then you're like,
okay, I guess.
Yeah.
I think
the most famous person in the world,
hear me out before I get cruised over this,
probably for the last four or five years, is Donald Trump.
I'm not saying the most popular.
I'm saying the most well-known person.
I can't imagine anybody Harper's age or older in developed countries doesn't at least know who he is.
Yeah.
And what he looks like.
That's probably true if he was anywhere.
That's true.
And in a few years, younger kids won't know him,
but right now,
almost everybody.
More than the queen.
Yeah, I think so.
His look,
his name,
everything.
Oh, also,
the picture of the queen
on the money
is from like
130 years ago.
It's very flattering.
It is.
Yeah.
When you do that,
you ask to go, can we take it a little more serious than, you know, when you do that, you ask to go,
could we take it a little more serious than, you know,
they don't walk in a room and go, hey.
She goes, what?
And then they get a weird picture and it goes, come on.
Like Seinfeld and Jerry took the picture of all the kissing.
In the apartment.
This picture looks, she looks at money and she goes,
this picture is so bad.
Every time I look at this money and they go, it'll be $4.
And she goes, oh.
And then she pays with her face on it, and the guy doesn't recognize her
because she has a ball cap on and jeans.
There he is.
There's the queen with jeans.
She pulls out Levi's.
She goes, my face is on all of this.
The queen with jeans.
Some of these, she's old.
But some of these, she's way younger in it.
You're going to tell me you'd be at a grocery store,
look at your money, then you look up,
and the modern-day queen is there.
And you're like, oh, that's her.
I just don't buy it.
Well, they go real high.
Didn't they do that in Notting Hill you remember that movie nodding i remember julia roberts uh yeah didn't she like go hot like she was so famous and so
she just went and did something almost like if they go do something normal no one will no one
will believe that they're there yeah that could not be in nodding hill well we told the story
last week about the queen out on a walk in the American
Tourist didn't recognize it because it's just such
out of place.
That's what I'm saying. That's the whole point of my
argument.
Shaq's
big.
Then you could say, what's his face?
Yao Ming? Yao Ming's up there too.
I put the two of them.
In height twice is what you mean.
He's up there.. Yeah. I put the two of them. In height-wise is what you mean. He's up there.
Is that what you meant?
He's physically up there.
He's physically up there.
Eric Berglin, the queen owns one-sixth of the world's land.
I looked that up.
Is that true?
Yeah.
The crown estate owns like 6.6 billion acres or something.
So she's like the landlord.
Yeah.
For one-sixth of the world?
Yeah.
That's like how much water there is.
You know what's that?
There's more water than land or something?
Yeah.
Yeah, like 70%.
That's what you would say to her.
How much water do you own?
Yeah, how much of that is water, though? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, like 70%. That's what you would say to her. How much water do you own? Yeah.
How much of that is water, though?
Yeah.
It's a worthless ocean.
That's crazy.
She owns all that land.
What has she done with it?
Nothing.
I don't know.
Yeah, she's done a lot with it.
What has she done?
To mow it is a ton.
You know how many people had the jobs you provided to mow all that
do you know how long
how many people
got hired
just the landscaping
landscape alone
is a lot of work
billion dollar industry
papa's
New Guinea's not hard
but mama in New Guinea
there's a lot of hills
I guess it's all
the commonwealths
oh
oh okay
dim
oh man
demelza
d-e-m-e-l-z-a I think that's. Demelza. Oh, man. Demelza.
D-E-M-E-L-Z-A.
I think that's right.
Demelza.
Demelza.
Demelza.
Let's get started again.
It's like, that way you describe the use of the knife and fork is how everyone in commonwealth countries generally operate their
cool their culture cut cut recovery cut
cut the larry
cut the larry the Larry.
Cut the Larry.
Cut Larry.
Larry!
Cut it out.
Cut it out, Larry.
How do you say it?
Cutlery.
Cutlery.
I generally operate their cutlery.
I feel like you're making fun of someone that's got a problem.
You know?
It's very nice.
The way Americans eat is pretty sloppy in comparison.
Because they
yeah.
I didn't help reading that sentence
that way.
I can't even argue with it.
I was like, what do we say after that
She's like checkmate
I barely made it to the insult of the Americans
I thought I was done with the sentence
And we got a big show coming up at Zany's
Yes
We haveuly 5th uh we are doing uh
two live nateland podcast shows at zany's uh you know you could come to both if you want to
uh we're going to do like we did last time and do two shows. So it'll be two different kind of topics.
And it won't be two topics.
It'll be one topic, but we will talk about different things on both episodes.
So if you did come and you wanted to stay for both, you could definitely do that.
And then that will be our anniversary.
And that's going to be our one year.
We're making it kind of a special show, two shows.
We're going to, if you get to come, we're going to make, you know,
I don't know, we're going to do something.
We'll make it nice and festive in there.
Yeah.
Look pretty good in there.
6.30 and 8.45 p.m. at Zaney's, July 5th.
You know, you'll be tired of your family, or bring your family, maybe.
You don't have to talk to them for a few hours.
I think most people are off work that day.
Oh, yeah.
Because that's the work holiday.
Yeah.
So here you go.
Come do the Nate Land podcast live recording.
It will be our one-year anniversary show.
And so we're going to have a topic. We're going we're gonna talk about something we're gonna make it fun but we're gonna make it special and uh for
the comments for that episode we are going to uh we have a uh we're gonna read comments there's a
am i gonna say what the episode is we have a best of episode coming out. And we're going to put that out.
July 1st, I think.
July 1st, which is the.
Thursday before.
Is that the anniversary?
That's the one year.
Exactly.
Yes.
So July 1st, which is Thursday, is the exact one year anniversary of our podcast.
We're going to have another regular episode come out on that Wednesday.
But then Thursday, we have put together a best of episode of the nateland podcast so all the we're gonna
read for the live show we're gonna read comments from the best of podcast we will catch up on your
other comments on other episodes but for that live one since it'll be an anniversary show uh
we are gonna we're gonna read the comments from that and you can you know comment about you
know i don't know the funniest stuff that from this podcast that you've had from you know just
stuff about the it's always about the podcast but it's like what has been your you can talk about
what your favorite moments are uh the dumbest things you've heard me say uh whatever you know we got we got a couple on the
episode today i mean yeah yeah you might have some today cut larry cut larry uh cut it out larry
that's how we drive that's how we describe forks you have any cut it out, cut it Larry? Is that what that means? Cut it Larry.
So, yeah.
I almost had another joke.
If you were eating with a Larry, and I said,
you have any cut it Larry?
He's like, yeah, I can.
And I go, no, no, I'll do it.
But do you have cut it Larry?
And he's like, okay.
Yeah, he's like, so what do you want? I don't really get what you want right now. I'm like, I want some cut it Larry and he's like it's like a who's on first yeah he's like so what do you want
I don't really get
what you want right now
I'm like I want some
cut it Larry
or was it cut Larry
cut Larry
I've already forgot
yeah
eight minutes ago
I bet we will never
forget after
this comes up
yeah
so yeah
just talk
so we will for the live episode we're going to read from the best of episode, the comments from that.
So if you have anything that, you know, make it, make it special.
We're all together.
We're all folks in this together.
So let's make that one a special one.
And we can't wait.
So, yeah.
All right.
Today we have our fellow comedian.
Loosely used. all right today uh we have our uh fellow comedian loosely used improv actor usually i have like an intro but all right yeah i was gonna say peer then i rethought it
you couldn't just say straight up comedian because that makes it seem like
you're like well i don't want people, when they go to your show, to be confused.
Yeah, that's fair.
What'd you say that one time when we were like –
you were like, oh, you guys are comedians, and we were playing golf,
and you go, well, I'm a comedian.
He, like, does videos.
Yeah.
I was like, yo, chill.
It's all – yeah, it's a little part too mean.
We'll go with what you wrote down and what you guys have prepared about me.
I didn't write anything.
We've never prepared anything.
Oh, you don't know this podcast too well.
Yeah, I thought you guys had a thing.
I'll just wait until you read my intro and then I'll come in.
You're like, no, we got nothing.
No, we're not reading your intro.
Oh.
Yeah.
Like, you know.
Okay, yeah, there's no intro intro the stuff that you've done yeah
we'll read your 2019 just google it's got a bunch of youtube views yeah that's how i start that is
how i introduce that's how you introduce what would be is that what it is yeah over a billion
views over a billion you've got over a billion views yeah a lot of autoplay stuff yeah it's just like
well the playlist once you get my mom is like she my mom always says you know i i get annoyed by the
advertisements but i watch them on your videos because i'm trying to support you i got mother
yeah i don't think that's gonna say mother i don't well that's not really a pointed story but i go
that's not really gonna translate into dollars for me, I don't think. Do you say mother, though? Yeah. You do? Mother, come on.
Do you?
Does everybody?
No, I say mom.
Dude, I got bullied one time when I was too old to say mommy.
Like at practice, I go mommy, and I was like two, whatever.
What's the age?
What's the cutoff age?
I mean, you're probably about to tell us what age you're.
How old are you?
I don't know.
I mean, I was probably seven, seven seven seven or eight no it's getting there uh
yeah for a guy for a boy yeah my like our daughter still says daddy but i think i think a girl can
pretty much say daddy forever forever like because his daddy's a little girl and it's a but a boy
yeah i was i was beyond the car i could see
and i don't think i think your mom loves it and so like i would understand that like i would think
if i had a son and my son called me daddy at seven or eight or nine like you're gonna want it
it's gonna be sweet and you're gonna love it as a parent yeah but i could see definitely uh
another the other kids the other kids like, you couldn't say it.
Well, that's like sometimes you want to see like sometimes on Instagram
like people kissing their kids on the mouth.
You're like, it's too old for that.
Yeah, yeah.
We just get right into it on this podcast, I guess.
We haven't even said your name yet.
Well, that was –
Oh, yeah.
What's up?
I don't know who you are.
That is true.
John Crist.
They know.
Probably not.
No, yeah, they know.
That's true. John Crist. They know. Probably not. No, they know. That's the attitude.
Maybe sometimes you just see it and you go, that's too much.
You don't know.
Yeah, that was the big Tom Brady when he kissed his son.
But it's all like he loves his boy, dude.
It's all like you're going to be.
And I love my mom, but I'm getting trashed for it.
This is the same narrative that's been going around about me for years.
Everybody.
About your mommy comment.
What about mama?
Mama.
Well, not like that, but mama.
Mama.
Mama.
That's like a.
That's a southern thing, I think.
Yeah.
So what is it?
I don't know.
People now, they say old man, old lady.
The old lady, yeah.
The old lady.
That's like, you know.
I feel like old lady is wife, right?
Don't you hear that used?
Yeah.
The old lady.
So my buddy Travis, my tour manager, he calls his dad old man.
Yeah.
So I guess you call your dad old man.
He'll call your mom.
Old man's different.
Don't call your mom his baby.
Not to him.
He's saying to you, he's my old man, or he says it to him he's saying to you he's at my old man or he's yeah to him
he might say to him too he might say hey old man like why don't you you know why don't you want it
why don't you come drive over here and pick me up i don't know he says that to me
it's like that old man song you know the song uh like well i love her but i love he's like yeah he just
leaves his wife i didn't get it i didn't get a lot from that song you sang it for
oh yeah name that tune that brad pays right yeah you know that song well uh what's the chorus
well i left her uh but i love the fish oh yeah yeah yeah why wouldn't you just say that part
first that's the main part is I love to fish.
You sang the lyric, no one knows, in the song.
You're like, no, I don't think I know that.
That isn't it.
Oh, the main most popular song of all time.
Yeah.
Actually, you know what?
I have heard that.
And it was, well, I love her.
You're like, that's in every country song.
It's like, it's a small world, but you don't say it's a small world.
You're like, what's the other words in small world after?
You're like, you know the song like After All? And I'm like, I don't know. You know, it's a small world, but you don't say it's a small world. You're like, what's the other words in small world after? You're like, you know, it's not like after all.
And I'm like, I don't know.
You know, it's a small world after.
You're like, yeah, do that part, dude.
Why would you not?
Well, I love.
Well, that's just like about like my old woman.
My old, she won't ever let me go fish.
And then he just says he's leaving her.
Yeah.
I'm out.
I'm out.
You just like, he goes, nah, I'm not going to out you just like he goes nah i'm not gonna listen
to her anymore if you're into fishing you know you gotta get out of there that's what that's
what then you and you got someone in the way and that's your old lady that's your old lady old
ladies in the way but isn't there like a you know how like if you call like if you call a woman
sweetheart there's like a endearing way to say it and then like a condescending way yeah like if you
say some girls in the grocery store and you can't like let me help you with that sweetheart there's like a endearing way to say it and then like a condescending way yeah like if you say some girls in the grocery store and you can't like let me help you with that sweetheart that's
saying that's a condes no oh that's kind of yeah i'm way off that's very sweet you're like some
like there she's like needs a flat helper with a flat i say mama let me help you out mama
mama yeah i don't think you can do that.
You know, women have larger hips than people think.
Oh, they do?
Yeah.
We learned that on a previous episode.
I don't think I'm allowed to comment on that.
If you want to get into it, you can.
Who taught you that?
The internet.
The Wikipedia.
It's probably not true.
We do a lot of research on this podcast.
Yeah.
So, welcome to the show.
It's good to be here.
And you have a big tour that just got announced too.
Huge tour.
Huge tour.
Yeah, yeah.
And what's it called?
It's called Fresh Cuts Tour.
Fresh Cuts Tour.
Let's go.
Yeah.
You know, so we have a big, so this collab is saying let's go.
I'm not a fan.
I started it, dude.
How many times do you say today
and then people took it and now it's it's out of the mainstream because of them i originally it's
like i started wearing visors dude i started visors yeah i did been worn quite a while yeah
but i think i took him into the mainstream yeah and then so you took net let's go in it yeah at
what point do you think you should stop saying it?
Because I think you're pretty far past the age.
I told a 12-year-old boy he has a year left of saying let's go.
Yeah.
So it's by age or it should be by?
Just you should, it's mommy.
That's the same type of territory?
I thought it was over my childhood trauma, but here I am.
Yeah, you're with let's go.
Do you think you even know you say it?
No.
Yeah.
How many times do you think you say it a day?
Other people started saying it.
They made it annoying is what I'm saying.
You weren't saying it.
When you started it, it was cool.
It was like when you nail a birdie.
But do you not then move on from it and go, all right, it's been taken out of my hands.
You've invented the word, the phrase, Let's Go.
I'd brought in.
So when do you let's go. I didn't, I brought in. And then,
so do you not,
when do you let it go?
When,
when,
yeah,
good point.
When I think I,
when I see someone else using it,
see,
I didn't know that.
They're doing it everywhere.
I didn't know that.
I mean,
are you alive?
They're doing it all day long.
Who's doing it?
I mean,
everybody on earth.
Let's go.
It's a very common phrase.
I said,
I tweeted on Instagram, or put on Instagram, like, let's go V's a very common i said i tweeted on instagram uh or put on
instagram like let's go vandy and then someone's like oh you said let's go but that's not let's go
that's you know let's go it's like with a lot of o's like yeah like let's go you're just saying it
you know uh they got your fruit loops you wanted let's go like it's that's when it gets into that
world that's out now it's too well i think
that's you know the same thing has happened with crocs is there was like oh fun ironic like weird
you're wearing crocs ironically now they're cool yeah so now we gotta we gotta talk to a man that
wears walmart slippers so certain but he's still good on those i feel like yeah but he's he's i
mean he's got a strikeped polo at Walmart.
If my feet were in the camera, I wouldn't be wearing them.
Yeah.
That's my idea.
Trying to stay fashionable.
Yeah.
I would wear regular shoes.
But like, let's say, well, let's say like.
Well, we have a foot camera now.
Foot cam.
Yeah, foot cam.
Yeah, foot cam.
We have a specific audience that wanted one, and so we gave it to them.
Just one guy, actually. it to them just one guy actually
yeah
it's one guy
he does the Patreon
we don't have Patreon
but he does it
and we said okay
and
just meld it to it
yeah
kind of strange
yeah
well that's like if
dude what if Vandy
like started winning
national championships
on everybody
and everybody's like
Vanderbilt
then you would have to be like
it's not cool
vanderbilt is winning national championships in baseball by the way they're called world series
uh and they uh but vanderbilt did i know it's like i know it's a sports is popular i've already
been i'm stamped in that's me on let's go yeah you've been saying let's go before it got cool
yes yes yeah let's go is your vanderbilt is what you're saying yes you've put in your time you've been saying let's go before. It got cool. Yes. Let's go is your Vanderbilt is what you're saying.
Yes.
You've put in your time.
You've earned it.
You've earned the time.
But now I need to be like, hey, listen, I'm not doing this.
Well, we were talking about how a lot of things when we say,
you start to say it ironically, and then eventually over time,
it just becomes unironic.
Like dope.
Something's dope.
Sick, dude.
I say dope still. I dope saying something's dope sick dude i say dope you do yeah i could say something's dope yeah but dope is kind of gone now it's like an age thing like
my age said dope and now it's kind of people are kind of over it but i guess how would i
same with the mommy thing how would i have known what i just know but
if that let's say that kid never said that to me yeah would i've just
gone forever yeah i mean you're still weird let's go a little probably too long so you might say
this is good yeah it's like i didn't know i've heard uh it's great do you say so you i've heard
uh i think people say mommy or something like that that's pretty old or you know yeah where
they say where it feels kind of like, you're like, all right.
It feels weird.
But it's not like I judge them in like a way that I, it's just like going like, all right, I don't talk like that.
That feels weird to talk like that.
Well, this is probably a thing that I know that means, well, I do it probably the most.
I don't know if y'all do it.
You definitely do not do it at all is laugh at your jokes on stage.
Yeah.
You hate that i mean
you're you say them every night are you surprised if you it's you do it some but i do it yeah yeah
i do it a lot i feel like i feel like laughing yeah you're like is this an intervention or
like john there's a couple things we need to address well
there's you know that's it like kevin hart did it where he would do one where it's like he can't
get through the joke and like you can get through the joke you know i understand the audience i've
laughed on stage and i'm not laughing at my joke i'm laughing at the reaction the joke is getting
yeah like i'm almost can't believe it's getting that much of a laugh so you laugh at someone when you're like super so hard yeah when you're like i can't get through this
joke shut up i need to tell it like that's it's it's a it's a trick you're not yeah you can get
through the joke you've told the joke and maybe if you come up with it look if you come up with
something i'll tell your head right in that moment i could understand laughing and it's funny and
you're like oh that was funny like i understand that but you don't think your jokes are not funny no but i don't
like i'm i am telling them and so like my job is to tell these jokes and i'm not gonna like
i'm not gonna laugh at them i'll have little laughs like i could have little like you know
like kind of weird yeah yeah where it's like a little tiny kind of a thing but the show
shouldn't be you shouldn't get a laugh off laughing off your joke that's not the point
of writing a joke like the the joke should be good enough that i make you laugh i shouldn't
be you shouldn't be you're laughing because i can't like he couldn't like you're laughing
because he can't get through his own joke you can't get yeah it is it does kind of give me a laugh if i laugh and then the people laugh in like it how much how
many words do you think you're actually saying on stage you know it's a lot of laughs how much
time do you do between your laughs 10 15 minutes an hour set well so a lot of people say in the
comments like oh my favorite
part is when you laugh but then the people that hate it aren't saying anything they're just not
following that's like all right so that was like when uh in snl when they talked about like uh
like fallon would do it yeah when you break right or uh everybody loves that i love that everybody
uh when they do it but if you're the way that other people would look at it sometimes is they'd be
like well i'm supposed to be really good and like i shouldn't be the other actors you talk about yeah
the other actors like i get to break those stuff we write is the thing that's supposed to be making
you laugh yeah it shouldn't be you breaking character that shouldn't be what the laugh's
about yeah that means you're you know it's like i'm gonna laugh at anybody that starts laughing a stranger starts laughing you start cracking up you start laughing so you the the
jokes are what i believe is the thing that should be yeah so if i don't have that is what you're
saying then i could just go with laughter yeah i mean okay yeah i've done that i've been going
through a set halfway through i'm like i'm not going to be able to fill my time so I start laughing more I did see a guy
this is a true story
Steven AJ
my buddy
I mentioned his name
because
he did it
he goes all I'm going to do
is just laugh
for the whole set
and he did a 10 minute set
he goes
and it was by the end
it was crushing
I promise you
he never said a word
never said a word
he just started
and then he would
trail off and then he'd go.
Why are you laughing?
He just started laughing because I did that.
He knew it was a thing.
Yeah, I understand why it is funny.
I understand.
That would be a tough special.
That would be a tough Netflix special.
I understand it's funny, but it's like, I don't know.
But I also, I do it, and I see comics do it, and I get annoyed with it.
I'm like, oh, he's just like, I get annoyed, and other people do it.
Well, there's a lot of tricks.
And so people don't realize that there's tricks.
There's a lot of stuff that you can do that, laughing at your own joke,
what's another trick?
I know the one you do.
What?
Where you say the punchline, and then you say two or three words after it to like trail it off like it and so he came out but you know if it like you
say like a little like a preposition or a phrase right i don't but i would look at it as like
that's not that's my rhythm of how i'm not you're not it's like yeah it's not a trick it's just like
you're but i see i also do this is like was inside inside comedy. We're like, all of your listeners, like we don't care about this, but I do see a lot of Nashville comics doing you.
They're like,
Nate does this.
Do what do you say that?
Yeah.
It kind of does this and it works for him.
I'm going to try to do that.
I caught myself putting my,
putting my hand behind my back,
like Nate very early on.
And somebody called me out and I didn't even know I was doing it.
But you come for me after let's go,
but this guy's taking your ass.
That is true.
Yeah. How about you go for me after let's go but this guy's taking your ass that is true yeah dude how about you go you go you go uh no it's no i understand you people can get
influenced yeah like so everybody's kind of got that i had a ton of comics i was influenced by
and you got to catch it b Brian Regan was a big one.
There were people like, and there's still people that do do that.
And you just got to catch yourself.
That's fine.
That's always fine.
You just got to catch yourself.
And you eventually, when you're young, it's like, yeah,
you're going to get influenced by comics.
Yeah.
And so you, but you end up just kind of, you got to police yourself
or you have someone, a friend that comes and goes, hey man,
you're doing this thing.
I was doing this Hot Pockets bit and everyone's like that's jim gaffigan yeah it's like okay well what's funny it's not even really always about a bit yeah a bit it's
about the cadence and yannis yeah we had yannis on here yannis used to go crazy about that where
he's like worse than the joke stealing was a cadence still. When you steal how someone tells a joke, that's everything, dude.
Like that's when you – if you told a joke like Brian Regan,
I don't know if I – I'm trying to think if I could.
You could do like a – like Theo has a very unique way to tell a story.
And I – yeah, you were like –
Mitch Hedberg.
Yeah, same type thing.
It's like, oh, he's doing him.
He's doing him.
And so he's figured a way out.
So if you, like, you know how long it took for him to figure that out?
And if you just walk in and take that rhythm and take that cadence from him,
that's way worse.
Because then.
It's like stealing their fishing pole versus stealing the fish.
Yeah.
Right?
Is that a good?
Oh, it's like.
I thought that was pretty good.
That's philosophical. Hey, thank you. you for those what really what was it it's like stealing what like you teach a man how to
it's like teaching a man to fish versus giving him fish yeah it's like stealing a joke it's like
stealing fish from him but when you steal the cadence yeah you're stealing every jump the
fishing pole yeah and ralphie may does that make sense i got i don't think so i got less
confident in it as i explained yeah yeah i know that's why i wanted you to explain it and they
it's uh ralphie may said he he said uh he's like yo they dude they can they got a bucket but they
can't get to the well meaning they can come dip the their bucket in your well but they don't have
the source yeah somebody taking your jokes because he goes people steal my
jokes all the time they can they can dip the bucket in the well but they ain't got the source
well let's say a joke guys yeah yeah it's pretty good yeah that's not bad it's i i i have a big
thing that was better than his i don't think people still jokes as much as people think
i agree with that i've always i've have we ever talked about that
or no yeah we talked about early on this yeah yeah i think it's way overblown i agree with that i
think i'm not saying it doesn't happen but it doesn't need to be policed by everybody if you
hear someone have a joke that sounds like someone else's joke people are gonna have the same kind
of jokes uh yeah where i don't think it's a gigantic kind of thing like i've
heard probably in the past i mean we go to zany's right three four times a week if we're off uh and
it was like uh what so it's like if you walk into a restaurant you got to wear a mask but if you sit
down covet hangs at about six feet goes right i've heard that 20 times yeah but that's not stolen
no that's just no regular people are doing that yeah yeah yeah
it's not you really can't be like oh like if someone else was doing like i was driving to
the mountain and saw a dead horse they'd be like okay that's nate park atzi's joke that's a very
you know what i'm saying but if yeah if someone had a dead horse joke you'd be like i think we
covered that i mean they could be i have mine's a whole story like i don't you know it's that's
what i want your comedy to be is you want it to be where no one can really can't be stolen it can't
be tell yeah like you almost want someone to be like you want it to be where no one can really can't be stolen it can't be told
like you almost want
someone to be like
I don't
you know
sometimes they're like
I don't even know
why I laugh
like they don't
you know
like there's no
like there's something
that they can't figure out
so like Brian's act
bait
yeah
yeah
it's like
you could steal that
pretty simple
from the back of a cereal box
oh my god
that's not true
I don't know
I could have a dead horse joke.
That just felt like a very funny thing.
It's connected dots.
It's a maze.
Trying to find the punchline.
We punched down on this podcast.
Yeah, literally.
This is the only podcast I've ever been on that I just get crushed the whole time.
It's fun.
But I did say that I put it in the group time it's fun but i did say i did say
that i put it in the group text because i said i saw baits killing uh yeah to be fair yeah but i
didn't want to sound like i was at a big weekend a huge weekend i did you had what was your whole
weekend so i was with uh angela johnson at stand up live in huntsville name drop thursday friday
well he just told me to my weekend yeah i'm not gonna just said i was in huntsville but
well it was sold out crowd i mean i feel like it's uh that would make me seem bigger than i Thursday, Friday Well, he just told me Tell me what weekend Yeah He just said I was in Huntsville Well
It was sold out crowd
I mean
I feel like it's
That would make me seem
Bigger than I was
Guys, I was doing sold out shows
In Huntsville all weekend
Yeah
I don't know how Nate
Feels about that
Yeah
And those shows were great
And then I came back Sunday
Did my own show at Zany's
Headlined that
How was that?
It was great
A lot of folks there
Oh yeah
Oh, that's cool
Yeah
That's nice I don't think anybody came Just A lot of folks there Oh yeah That's cool That's nice
I don't think anybody came
Just because of me
But a few folks
That's not true
A few
Well let me finish
It's very true
Yeah
Let them talk
Let the boy talk
A few folks told me
They came to Nashville
For the weekend
And made me part of
Their weekend
So that's
But that's what
Everybody's weekend is
That counts
That's when you go to shows That's like That's like when i do shows in vegas people come
all over yeah you're you're a part of like what they're doing yeah and i'm very honored for that
i mean you you want them to get in the car and drive home right after your show like that's the
only way to so thank you but i mean i'm just saying you you obviously have tons of people
that come to town just for you but But they make a whole thing about it.
So you said they were going to Nashville the weekend of the 12th.
Oh, Brian happens to be there.
Or let's book our schedule around Brian, then stay for the weekend.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Whereas they may build a weekend around coming for your show.
But I was very thrilled.
Everyone was great, very nice.
And then I left Zany's and went over to the
ryman and opened for leanne morgan and she sold out show there and that was that was good that's
the one you were at yeah because i put in the group text to y'all three i didn't want to sound
like surprised that brian was killing i was like brian i wasn't gonna be like oh my goodness this
is unreal dude he's murdering i was like he's doing great yeah he's everybody lean's crowd loved it
yeah yeah it was great it was great it was great and did great yeah we did great
standing ovation um it was it was a lot of fun yeah that's awesome great yeah me and lean morgan
doing a arena together let's go tupelo mississippi uh tickets are on sale i believe now are the uh
uh tickets are on sale i believe now are the uh are they on yeah they're on uh no it's the rain yeah it's like a pre-sale full they go on sale full friday uh what about is i was gonna
ask if and i don't know the answer to this because is everyone well how familiar is everyone here
with the other person's act of their act like have you listened to his special
uh probably not no have you listened to it yeah that's what i'm saying i don't follow have you
have you seen all well i got in trouble by brian because i've unfollowed brian on twitter oh yeah
oh that's great wow well let me tell us about the story he approaches me at zane he's like i'm like
the police investigator he's like i heard you unfollowed me uh picked up the story he approaches me at zane he's like i'm like the police investigator he's like
i heard you unfollowed me uh picked up the paper this morning and couldn't believe what i've read
john chris unfollows brian bates yeah but you don't like have you watched all of his specials
on that i've seen all have you i've seen all the nate stuff yeah but you've seen it i've done
comedy longer than everybody yeah but if you ask so that's like there's a difference it's not like there's this uh it's it's there i've done comedy for 18 years
like that's a long time like i've done it longer than it like that's the thing i'm older than
everybody i've done it except for but it's comedy years i'm way older like it's in and that's how
everything's always looked at in comedy. It's not really their age.
It's always looked in comedy.
Comedy years.
You've also got more stuff out than all of us, obviously.
I've been doing it forever.
You've seen his act.
You've seen me.
No, yeah.
I've seen his act.
I know his act.
You don't watch my videos, probably.
Every once in a while, you see one.
I'll see them on Instagram.
I don't watch.
Yeah, that's what.
So I'm not.
When I show up to play golf, we're all just assuming that the other person sees the other
person's stuff.
They probably don't.
Very loosely.
I mean, I probably know his stuff the best just because he's been on the road.
And if he had a special come out, you wouldn't listen to it because you've already heard
it, right?
Or would you listen to an audio?
I would think when your dry bar came out.
I think I looked at that i saw
that the whole thing yeah but uh did you watch the whole thing i don't think i watched the whole
thing that's what i'm saying it's 25 minutes yeah yeah that's but yeah we all kind of interact with
the others like if they if you do something big we'll see well it's going to be a matter of what
you're doing or where you're at like where it's like how busy you are and like i don't get to see
mini specials but do you ever like interact with someone like some family like hey you're like do you know my bits or that you're
like do you just assume they don't know anything about you someone in the community or in the
neighborhood you're like you know i have a very funny yeah i'm in my community quite a bit well
like at the golf course or something to be like oh do you know i have like a do you have you seen my thing about this or just like i leave it alone community such a i never
said in the community you guys pretty active in your communities you're like yeah i'm in the
community quite a bit i talked to a lot of community like in the neighborhood yeah that's
the community right uh well that's like when you get recognized the more you get known is like you
have to assume like now i still like because now you're in a weird balance where i like when you get recognized the more you get known is like you have to assume
like now i still like because now you're in a weird balance where i like i'll get recognized
you know it's not every week yeah you know like i will it's not a overwhelming amount it's i'm not
surprised by it anymore and like so then sometimes you you assume that you do assume that they have
seen your stuff
your stuff yeah yeah and you mentioned it but i mean i'll if i tell someone like if i was like
someone brought up a dead horse thing and i would say to the person and they have oh i think uh i
have a joke about a dead horse and they're like yeah no i know and then you're like okay sorry
i didn't know if you knew i would say yeah i would say that every time i'm not gonna just assume like
yeah you know like my bit about this i'm, you obviously know I'm a dead horse comment, right?
And they go, yeah, yeah.
And I go, yeah, obviously.
Clearly.
This is what I do.
Have you heard the story with Brian?
It's one of my favorite stories with a guy that was at your show.
And didn't recognize me the next day?
Yeah, that you recognized him.
It was actually a girl.
Oh, okay.
But you recognized them.
The next day, I was at a sandwich shop. I was hey were you at the nate margenzi show last night
she's like yeah were you yeah it's like yeah it's the opener yeah i mean it's the
the audience can't even go out they're like don't go out near a show because you're gonna
get recognized by the owner she was wearing a hat and glasses yeah yeah she goes i don't know he's around here somewhere
the opener is somewhere he's gonna come up and ask for a picture so make sure you
don't go out yeah you're gonna get recognized on the opener
or that like if i it's left as you get if somebody says like john or like they recognize you
and you assume like i was at like a tj maxx or something or somewhere like ross or like there i go they go you are you
do i recognize you and i go into this like oh yeah like i'm a pretty big deal on the internet
they're like no you were here last week i go oh you're like that's the yeah it's nothing worse
yeah that's that's where you don't want to say you don't want to assume i mean i uh i would assume now if someone knows, even if they don't know my work, they know I'm a comedian.
And so you at least get to a point like that.
They look at you like, where do I know that guy from?
Yeah, they're like, oh, yeah, I think I've seen some of your stuff.
I was wearing an Aaron Webber shirt one time.
I've told you this story.
I was wearing an Aaron Webber shirt.
And a guy goes, dude, I love Aaron Webber.
And I go, dude.
He goes, yeah, I saw him at like in like
louisville like i was like yeah with me yeah i was he didn't know about me he forgot about me
yeah i've been recognized or you've been recognized in front of me yeah we were at a
opry mills yeah well the one thing i think about was oh yeah that was on the street yeah yeah
he recognized you and i took the picture of them, and then they just left.
After the show.
Yeah.
But there was once at Opry Mills with the movies, and the guy came up and said,
hey, man, I see you as I'm a big fan.
Send it to me, and you're right there beside me.
And I said, he does comedy, too.
He's like, oh, cool, man.
Keep it up.
Keep at it, dude.
This is a better way of being self-depreciating versus like have you
ever heard like self what self-depreciating that's a sorry it's five syllables deprecating
self-depreciating depreciating decreasing in value yeah which i've said so much
which that is happening yeah but that's yeah self-depreciating he's actually right now that
we think it's like a car oh yeah you're right drive him off the lot yeah once it once he left the lot it was always going down you know it was self-deprecating
all right well you know sit in with his podcast by the way have you ever i used to open for comics
they were like if you were like you would stand out there after the show the opener and the
headliner he's like hey don't like the biggest insult you could do to the main comic is take a photo in front of him.
Or like the main comic doesn't want to be up like by the opener.
So you're like, hey, don't say that too loud that you love me
because the main is like an egomaniac and he can't handle it.
You could obviously handle that.
You would be like fine with someone recognizing Brian and not you.
Yeah, it's funny.
Yeah, that's funny to me too, but not all comics are like that.
And if it happened a ton, I'm sure I would get a little annoyed by it.
Like, yeah, if it was overwhelming, like, all right, I got to do something.
Yeah.
This is clearly.
I just did a radio interview in O'Fallon, Missouri.
Name drop.
And they knew me.
Obviously, they knew Aaron because he was there the week before.
Did not know Nate.
I was pitching the Nate Land podcast.
They had no idea who you were.
Those small places are not into comedy.
They're not into you.
You're like, Nate Land podcast, Nate Bargetti and Aaron Webber.
Oh, Aaron Webber's on it?
They loved Aaron.
I love that guy.
Aaron Land.
He came through.
Which, by the way, I will give Aaron Land a shout out, their Instagram page.
It's hilarious, isn't it?
It's very, very funny.
I have no idea who's making it, but they're funnier than me.
I don't know.
It's very...
I haven't followed them yet,
but I will.
I think Dusty reposted it.
Yeah, I'm going to...
I'm going to follow them
because I want to look at them more.
So go follow Aaron Land.
It is very, very funny.
Yeah, it is.
It's very funny.
It's great.
They're so specific.
I mean, you...
You're not going to get any of it,
but if you get it,
you're like, it's the best thing ever.
If you get it, it's the best if you get it it's the best
it's like golf memes to me
golf memes are the funniest memes
I've ever seen in my life
and most people don't get it
but like
god they're the best
if you get it
and so Aaron Land's like that
where
and keep it like that Aaron Land
that's what makes it so great
don't go mainstream
he's like it's not even me
yeah
the Nate Land theme park
was also great
oh yes
that's right
we got a Nate Land theme park
that was great too
Very specific for stuff like this
We're all about specifics
I made a video about
Vacationing on 30A
Like if you get it you're like this is unbelievable
But 99% of people
Would never get any of the jokes
I don't even know what 30A means
Have you ever been there?
If you've been there you're like I figured't even know what 38 means but if you have you ever been there if you white people go if you've been there
you like
I figured that
that's what
that's what his comedy
is for
it's
it's not true
I'm a man of the people
it's a high end
you know
he does 1% comedy
yeah
that means in his show
there's only 1% of comedy
the rest of it's laughing
at his own jokes
I'm gonna get called out for this this weekend.
It's not going to be out by this weekend.
I'll be good.
Wednesday.
Today is 1% of comedy.
Is today Monday?
No, today's Tuesday.
It comes out tomorrow.
Somebody is doing something that you follow on the internet
that's annoying. You just unfollow them.
You wouldn't be like, hey, can you not so but you guys are being honest with me that's
what they told me in rehab if someone can be honest with you then you should trust them yeah
well you say no more mommy no more laughing at my jokes no more let's go is there anything else
now that we're here how long do you want this to be it's a two-parter. He's back.
I don't care for the shirt you wore today, but I think that's... No, I'm wearing a band-aid.
But do you think I can speak?
I was going to say.
I know.
I'm wearing like a...
Brandy's at the Cultural Theater.
Do you know our material, though?
You obviously don't know mine because you were so surprised Sunday night.
No, I wasn't.
You said that.
You said, where did this material come from?
Well, it was great.
Well, it was probably new material.
No, he only sees me on New Material Monday.
I'm talking about the Ryman show.
At the Ryman.
Yeah, but you can't.
No one's watching him by that Monday show.
Yeah, where would.
That's my point.
He sees me at New Material.
He doesn't see my go-to jokes.
Yeah, but that's not like a bad thing.
No one's watching that.
Where would I have seen that?
Those jokes. And if you're a younger comic're younger no one you can't expect someone i know your stuff because i follow trey kennedy so hey wow how long has he been holding that i was gonna say
that's been in the holster for that's the reason he started the pot that's the reason he did the
podcast was to get that out he asked me me every week, is John coming on?
And I go, I don't know.
I guess we'll have him on at some point.
I got a good one.
Please have him on.
I got one ready for him.
You and Trey are close, though, right?
Yeah, we're buddies.
I went to his wedding like a month ago.
Oh, yeah?
Yeah.
What do y'all have?
How's y'all's relationship?
What are you about to ask?
What is funny?
You're very similar.
Yeah.
People send me like bits of,
or people tell me all the time
about his bits.
I go,
it's not mine,
but all right.
I just go,
all right,
thanks, man.
Yeah.
I don't really interrupt it.
No, no, no, no.
You're both very funny at it.
But it's because we look the same?
I mean,
I think your mannerism,
that's what some of y'all's man runs can kind of he
didn't even say he's like you're very funny at it he meant like he didn't mean stand up he meant
like whatever whatever y'all are doing over there that's not stand up yeah no i know i mean trey
yeah yeah it's you're doing videos but trey has an hour of he has a live show oh yeah oh yeah
you go out with him i have i open for him in huntsville yeah and uh he kills man
he sings songs yeah uh like like uh who's lying on wayne brady would bring a girl up and sing to
her he does that and he just kills man people love it yeah nate's closer he took nate's closer yeah
yeah that's your if people build their own world up and they have their own audience i'm all all
about i've said the
same thing i've said the same thing about about people that come through zany's i go well everyone
here is trying to sell tickets and you filled it so yeah yeah yeah that should be said to knock
yeah yeah yep yep yep and everybody like let's say like like i'm trying to think of who like like
jerry seinfeld would never bash carrot top orinfeld would never bash Carrot Top or Carrot Top would
never bash Larry the Cable Guy because they're I wouldn't I would assume that all the guys up there
don't trash on the other guy that's up there because they know how hard it is to get up it's
hard to get up there like what's who's the guy that does the the puppets Jeff Dunham he would
never like trash like like yeah well I wouldn't imagine anyone would be like it's a funny
it's wood but he yeah you would say it's a funny act like his act yeah great who would say that
i'm saying that's what they everybody would say about each other like no he's got a great act
dude and you gotta do great act yeah like that this is my own problems where i deal with my own
like it's like as a stand-up and then what i do like you get very defensive and very of stand-up of pure yeah you get like we get you get lumped in sometimes and you want to be
like no dude it's not what i do and then would it be fair to me if i've been doing stand-up for
10 years and i was doing stand-up long before i was ever doing videos i'm now like like lucy would
always make fun of me like introduce me as like a YouTube sensation to make fun of what I think that's funny.
But they're like, because they're like, oh, he's with those guys.
Well, you would say I would be with those guys.
And most everyone would say I was with those guys.
I mean, what do you think?
You think you were with stand-ups, with comics?
I would like to say so, but I know that's not true.
Everyone's like, dude, we love you from not my stand-up videos.
Yeah, but it doesn't matter really what they...
I guess if you're a stand-up, because people know David Spade.
No one knows him from stand-up.
Yeah, but he fills the place.
Yeah, but I mean, you'd be in the same kind of idea where you're like...
We're going to see him.
People are coming to see you for whatever they're coming to see you for.
And then when they come see you, but they know you're a stand-up comic i don't think they expect it i don't think they expect you just like see i think they know they're
coming to see a stand-up yeah i think for sure and most youtubers or people are disappointed
because they don't have an act you have an act yeah some people are disappointed but not most
aren't yeah no they're yeah no they're like this is gonna have an act that's the that's the that's
the point well like if you go to see like i remember when the impractical jokers they were
doing like madison square garden and no one knew what the show was yeah they're like we like those
guys let's go see what it is and then they create a show that's great and that's yeah you gotta
create a show like that's what it is you gotta you gotta build an act and that's that's what
you know and i it's i just it's some of it is like they're you know
it's like being a uh i don't know you're like i'm just i don't know it's just whatever yeah
i'm a stand-up and like so then i i joke about the others you know the uh the greatest showman
that movie yeah i've never seen him but i got it all right it's like a uh it's like it's about
the circus and then he so it was like people that were like seven foot one and they were like dude let's get that guy out
he's a circus crazy and then he goes well why don't we put him on stilts and make him 15 feet
tall and then he got in trouble because i want the fat man he was like 250 pounds like why don't we
stuff him full of pillows and make him 800 pounds and everybody got in trouble he goes because it's
not real and he goes but the laughter was real yeah you know what i'm saying it's like that's not you're like but
so whatever you do puppets or you do guitars or you do you're like but everyone had the time of
their life in there and that's what we're all trying to do yeah yeah yeah right yeah that's
true that's true like it's not it's not so if some guy plays a guitar or all the things that
we say are not true comedy.
You know, one guy, you know, he holds his, or he does act outs, or he does like, we usually say like too many like act outs.
He's doing, it's not traditional, a guy with a microphone talking.
Yeah.
That's all it's allowed to be.
Well, you know, like to me, like someone's cadence, like Dane Cook was someone that like a lot of people took his yeah that
movement him the way he prowled around kind of came and went and a lot of people uh well no i'm
saying like they took like they started doing that yeah thank you and i think it was a lot in la oh
in a good way no no i'm saying we're talking about taking cadence yeah i'm kind of back to the
cadence i got you all right whatever they do a lot of people took Dane Cook's stuff
because Dane Cook, the way he moved and walked on stage
and then a lot of comics, that worked.
Well, look at what Sebastian does.
It's unreal.
I think it's unbelievable.
He did an act out of a guy on a bird scooter.
He's like, you're 56.
I can't do it.
But he goes, it was unreal.
And he acted it out with the it was
but somebody would say oh he's just like milking the yeah but it's like you're painting the picture
yeah yeah i mean yeah look i gotta get better sometimes i can be too
pure purist like i want it to be too you know you paint the i paint the picture with the words
yeah and uh i'm even trying to get it, you get a little movement.
I got a little more movement in my act, especially if you start doing theaters, you got to move
a little bit more.
Okay.
So, uh, huh?
All right.
I'm all over the place.
I'll do it.
Uh, you, all my shows are theaters.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But tell the story about the act out about the guy that i followed on josh's show josh black
show i don't think i can tell that i'm trying to think of it all right he had a he had a i can't
tell it but he had a bit about a woman with an oxygen black and where's he at he's here i know
he's an ashfield guy and john did his show and john had to follow one of the top five hardest
i've ever seen anybody kill at the club and the the guy had a very – the guy named Mike Drew.
Oh, my.
He had a very elaborate act out.
I'm nervous revisiting this.
Very elaborate act out involving the mic and the mic cord and the stool.
No, the girl on an oxygen tank, and he headed up to here.
The stool was the oxygen tank.
He was pulling it around.
He was doing all this.
He was murdering.
Killing where you like
saw people start to come back inside like what's happening and they were like like he was dragging
around the the stool upside down and had the mic cord around the top of his head which going right
under his nose and the child had to go up next and he was crushing so hard yeah and i can't i go i
can't i got nothing for this. I got nothing.
And they're up next, John Chris.
I was like, dude, just close the show on this guy.
Did you walk on stage using a stool as a walker?
And you start going, that's what he should have done.
Oh, man, this is unbelievable.
Yeah, so you say, is that cheating?
I wouldn't say so.
No, I mean, it sounds very funny.
It's not cheating. It's not because it's – I thought it say so. No, that's a – I mean, it sounds very funny. No, it's not cheating.
It's not because it's – I thought it was unbelievable.
People are going to do whatever they're going to go do.
If it's original, I don't think.
I will never be upset.
Yeah.
I think it's when it's not original and it doesn't feel original
or feel authentic to what that person does.
That's what I don't like.
If you do it like i
have no problem with carrot top at all yeah i think here top is unbelievable and one of the
greatest ever i laughed for 90 minutes straight at that show because and people trash carrot top
it's like who's doing what he's doing nobody nobody yeah he's actually maybe the most original
uh out of all of us oh good point so he's using props no one's using
it's ridiculous it's just no one everybody wants to make fun of them for whatever dumb reason
because they're not but then have to be there make fun of them their act is terrible to begin
horrible yeah and so carrot drops is wonderful dude he's terrific that's very funny larry cable
guy it's very funny he's doing a million jokes nobody's doing anything no one's doing what he's
doing so like when you if you're original i'd have no no problem thank you that's it i have
no process i was starting you have no problem with acts being different than me you should be
it's the original aspect of it that i i think i that's when i'm kind of like all right or if i
feel like you're doing a bunch of tricks if you're doing an act out and you're selling
what you're because the joke isn't strong enough you doing it yeah if you're doing an act out and you're selling what you're because the
joke isn't strong enough you doing it yeah if you're doing like if you if you're yeah if it's
if it's tricks and i feel like you don't even have there's nothing even there yeah and the
reason you're getting laughs is because like is is you know for that guy to have all that stuff
like that it's like that's very thought out and like he's making it look like that yeah that's very very funny yeah and like so because he's doing it that way but if you're and he didn't
bring any extra props on stage he used what the stage gave him yeah yeah it was cool my yeah that's
what i felt i was like because i grew up in church my dad's a pastor i grew up worked at chick-fil-a
i was like i was doing all these like somebody i worked at chick-fil-a yeah now but i was like i
remember being in la and trying to like, my agent or somebody was like,
hey, don't tell any of these Christian jokes.
Like no one, no one really going to get it.
Or it was like very, and then I was like, you know, what's the difference between texting
and driving and all like very generic stuff.
But I was killing with these like very, me, who I, and then somebody goes, hey, just,
I saw, I don't know who it was, somebody at the Comedy Magic Club doing a joke about Moses and the burning bush.
And I got off, and she was murdering.
And I go, what's happening?
She goes, I don't know.
It's a story.
Yeah, if you didn't know it, I kind of exposed it.
Because Moses was in there.
Yeah.
And everyone was, this is in LA.
Everyone was dying laughing.
I go, oh, okay.
So everybody knows about the stuff,
so I'm just going to start talking about it.
And then I've been like a Christian comic,
and then every night I go into freaking Zany's,
and this guy's doing Christian material, just stealing my act.
It's like I thought I was the only guy, but now Brian Bates is like,
dude, what's up with growing up in church?
This is my act.
Look at him laughing.
He's not saying anything, dude.
No, i'm worried
about you still in mind now they're uh i talk about my uh parents or us growing up christian
we're still christian but it's uh but growing up just a little bit of my but that is who you
like if you say about like being raised that but i mean a lot of people everybody talks about that
like everybody talks about of cath Everybody talks about Catholic or whatever.
Yeah.
Yeah, everybody does that.
I could see that where they tell you, someone says, no, do it.
But then you're like, yeah, you got to just be you.
It's like, you're going to sell that stuff, and that's the world that.
You got to just be, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, you have a unique upbringing.
You have a bunch of brothers and sisters.
Yeah, seven.
Big family, seven.
Come from a big, big family.
Yeah, huge.
Dad's a pastor. Yeah. Growing up in the South. so it's like yeah you're gonna grow up yeah just talk yeah i mean you know we talked about tim hawkins but tim hawkins was one of the best shows
i've ever seen yeah still is yeah when i went and watched them but if you go to like like let's see
i go i saw sebastian this weekend he's like italian family i was like i'm not italian family
but i would like to yeah i get it yeah big italian family i was like i'm not italian family but i would like to yeah i
get it like a big italian family they like to cook they like to like like talk behind people's back
or whatever i go i'm not really that but i'm with it people like relatable yeah and relatable is
something that really sells well to audiences and because they want you know it's like they don't
you you get to hear your life being made fun of kind of if it's their way it's to you
but like they get to go no i'm we all are we're all the same dude no one's yeah i don't talk
about original but i've always think no one's really original like yeah nobody kind of you
know that doesn't but i want your act to be original and come from a different have a
different point of view whatever yeah but as far as audiences when we all go sit out there we're
all basically the same guy all of us grew up basically the same way yeah not really that much different there
could be different parts whatever yeah but we all went to church we all did this stuff
played sports in high school or yeah if you go to california a lot of people grew up in a different
kind of way yeah but they all grew up the exact same kind of everybody kind of grew up you're
getting in trouble by your parents your parents were this you try not to yeah it's everybody yeah but i was at the leah
morgan show who's like i'm not the demographic for that show yeah but i i and i thought it was
unbelievable and there was one joke about like she can't shop at victoria's secret anymore she
shops at soma and i go i don't know what that is. But I get it. Context clues.
Yeah, I got to do a joke about like, you can't name your kid like a Bible name if it's a weak kid.
Like I got a nephew named Ezekiel named after the warrior in the Old Testament.
This kid's got a peanut allergy.
It's like, you don't know Ezekiel, but you're like, yeah.
Yeah, I'm Catholic.
We don't read the Bible.
Okay.
I have no idea who Ezekiel is.
I had heard the name Ezekiel.
But you get the joke. I don't know the story, but yeah, I get the joke. Yeah, so you're like, I'm a little We don't read the Bible. Okay. I have no idea who Ezekiel is. I had heard the name Ezekiel. But you get the joke.
I don't know the story, but yeah, I get the joke.
Yeah, so you're like, I'm a little out on this.
Your brain go to Ezekiel Elliott first?
No.
Is that the first thing that you thought?
But would you say like –
Strong running back.
Yeah, that is dumb to compare that kid to.
The Cowboys running back?
Oh, the Bible.
So you don't want somebody to come to your show,
to Nate Bargatze's show and be like, oh, I'm out on this.
But you're like, but someone that loves you,
loves you because they're in, in.
If they grew up the very same way or their dad was,
or their parents were,
there can be different levels of connection to your,
you're like a Christian mom from the South loves me,
but the husband will have a good time.
Yeah.
It's not like it's-
Tolerated.
Yeah.
But when they come to the show, you want them to, I mean,
you still want to be, no one grew up with a magician dad.
Yeah, you don't want to be like, anyone else's dad
is a magician. No. You got to to be like anyone else's dad he's a magician
you gotta have the things that make you kind of there is something that's kind of different uh
but it's like in the grand scheme thing like the my marriage is like a lot of people relate to that
marriage but i think i play a lot to women like there's a lot of things that i'm a lot of wives
you know like i don't know nothing about our money or i don't know anything about
banking yeah yeah we're a lot of a lot of times it's i mean a lot of times it is women that do
all that stuff but sometimes the women are like yeah you know uh that yeah the the joke of you
know now don't give my wife a credit card she's going to go spend stuff that's the most common
joke ever well that's me in our marriage is my wife doesn't want me to have a credit card because
i'm going to do whatever.
And she's going to be, yeah.
But that stereotype does exist in the brain of everyone.
It does, but it's a matter of who relates to it. So like that's when sometimes I can see four wives come out to a show and their husbands don't come.
And like they get it.
You know, there's going to be parts where they relate to me and parts that they're like, that's my husband.
Do you think the wives asked the husbands and they said no or they said let's would be better off
with the girls i think that conversation yeah a girl's night out is what i mean some of them that
come up and say it they're like just they said they want a girl's night out and then yeah they're
i mean maybe their dude doesn't care he goes who yeah i have mainly couples so it's uh yeah it's
a lot of generation i's a lot of generations.
I mean, a lot of times it's like grandparents to everybody.
What do you have?
I do shows.
What's your typical audience?
I mean, have you ever heard a guy on Guy's Night?
I haven't.
Had what?
A bunch of dudes on Guy's Night.
I've had dudes, yeah.
I've never.
It's like two dudes.
But I went to Trevor Wallace's show and it was all dudes, like all frat dudes.
I was like, oh, I got to get in on this audience.
Yeah.
Maybe I should stop doing this feminine mannerisms on them.
Yeah.
Everybody's like, is he gay?
What's this guy's deal?
I was like, I was doing an impersonation of a female.
Show them.
Yeah. I don't get it. Yeah. gay what's this guy's deal i was like i was doing a impersonation of a female you showed them yeah
i don't get it yeah
no we're in in uh that 30a video yeah i was gonna title it every girl that goes to 30a so i was
doing like but then i was acting and then i got done with the video
i was like well this is kind of everybody yeah and then i just posted vacations on 30a once was
the title but i was very like i'm gonna text this to my boyfriend and yeah but then i was like well
this is kind of confusing that now because what what why is he acting like that 30 we're going to
38 for the first time yeah you love it a little bit yeah and uh but i know
everybody that in here that all everybody talks about is 38 yeah they they love that yeah in your
neighborhood yeah yeah i mean it's all the neighborhood yeah vacation down there yeah yeah
yeah but everyone's 30 you're getting the other side of town we don't know what it is i had no
idea so you would say that video would be similar to a bit.
So if you are in on that, this is the most unbelievable bit I've ever seen.
Oh, it's going to be the most.
But if you're out, you're way out.
Way out.
There's no.
I mean, you probably would get it.
Every town has their vacation spots.
That's where everybody goes.
I was just clueless of all this.
I don't know where people went.
We didn't go to
fort like i mean we did some stuff but but like if somebody said hey nate write a bit about i'm
trying to think of something like uh something like smoking weed your bit your bit would be like
i did it and then i went to taco bell like you don't i don't know the weed you know what i'm
saying i'm not the guy to write that joke. I should be writing the 38 jokes.
That's what I live and know.
So like.
Well, you'd write your perspective on it.
And so you would, and that's what should make it different.
Versus like, yeah.
Is you're going to attack it from a different way
that I would hope I wouldn't do the Taco Bell thing.
And some of it would be, I would know everybody does that a different way that I would hope I wouldn't do the Taco Bell thing. I would,
and some of it would be,
I would know everybody does that.
And so then I would think,
well,
how do I think of a better angle?
Even if you didn't,
weren't understanding of that culture.
How do you,
uh,
yeah.
How do you,
how do you come up with a different way?
I mean,
that's the,
you don't want to say the thing that everybody's saying.
Yeah.
And sometimes doing that though,
you end up saying something that's so obvious that that's when those are
the ones that hit the hardest yep yeah when they're like when you come up with an idea that
everybody's like god why didn't i like you make it fun of 38 could be like why did i not make it
fun of 38 yeah there's a there's a lot of everybody gets that joke oh so sometimes you're going to
make up you're going to come up with something that like you're doing it and then everybody's
like wait you know it's like when you think of a joke and you think like have i heard this joke where i heard before yeah and then you're it's something
you can't believe that you haven't heard it but it's so right there it's right there that it's
gonna be like golly so it's gonna and then that joke usually destroys yeah it was very sometimes
those are the jokes where you could end up finding out there are some similar jokes.
And then there's like a guy on Twitter that is like researched and he's like, look at this word compared to this word.
I'm like, okay.
You and I know a lot of the same Christian comics.
Lots.
Out there.
Tim Hawkins kind of took it to the next level as far as making it a little bit not as hokey and different type of.
And then you took it a step further to make it more modern mainstream i go he's he goes not better but you took it another
step yeah yeah well a different way yeah i think i think that like the like mark lowry who's a comic
before me like not before no no not before me before tim hawkins yeah he was like he was the
guy yeah and then so you're like, are you really doing it?
Are these young comics coming up?
You're like, I'm reinventing the game.
We're like, yeah, every young comic did.
Yeah.
We all did.
Yeah.
And so Mark Lowry told me, he goes, I don't know how you're getting away with saying some
of this stuff, because I said, he said the phrase breaking wind when he was coming up
and he got kicked out of a church for that.
Yeah.
For saying that and then tim kind of took it a step farther and would and i've taken it a step farther yeah but i also think there are people that take it too far yeah that but like
i don't know where the line is i would like to hear the context for breaking wind yeah i should
ask him yeah he said i don't he goes he called me he goes i don't know who you are but i'm not
this is unbelievable what you. This is unbelievable.
What you're doing is unbelievable.
He goes, this is incredible.
I go, what?
I mean, I don't know.
Well, that was, I mean, growing up in a, you know, like, I mean, Southern Baptist.
Like, I mean, we weren't, my high school wasn't allowed to dance.
We couldn't have a prom.
This isn't like in the 1700s.
This is like in the.
Yeah, 97 when I graduated. Like, i don't know anything dance now i mean the parents would end up having a thing off site where
they could dance yeah but a lot of christian schools they weren't they you know and a lot
of it it wasn't like the younger christian but you could tell that there was still you know you
had teachers that were in their 60s yeah 70s so so they would have grown up. A lot of it's just like, yeah, it eventually gets –
eventually they allow dancing because the older people kind of move on,
and then the people my age are then like, it doesn't matter if they dance.
And so now I don't care if they dance, and people my age don't.
But I have other things that I don't want them to do.
And then the next people come up, and then they knock that stuff out everything changes it just takes time for it to
change yeah uh but not necessarily a bad so like i can see like break and win and there's times like
i've been cleaner i think than a church i've i've heard the pastor say stuff like do it he'll do a
drug joke you're way cleaner than me and then uh yeah way actually yeah yeah i got a lot yeah i
never thought about it but for yeah yeah i mean i make a reference just all kind of stuff but you
yeah in terms of like but you wouldn't be like in the in like a christian comedy uh no but you know
but i talk of like i was thinking but you do church you've done a church before yeah but i
would say there's a lot of murder like i, I'm like, this guy got shot.
My family might get murdered.
Like, I say the murder a lot.
Yeah.
But I don't curse.
I don't talk about sex.
I don't curse.
Yeah.
You know.
What is that thing?
Was it an article about you?
Or like, here are all the Catholic comedians or something?
Yeah, I got.
And he was like, wait, what?
Because, like, people try to.
Or people said that about you about certain. You're like, hey, it. And he was like, wait, what? Because people try to, or people said that about you about certain,
you're like, hey, here's all the, you're like, what?
Here's the Republican, you're like, what?
I didn't, where did I say that?
They like to assume.
Well, they assume because you're in an area.
And they like to put, so that's what, it's always been about me
with Christian comedians.
Like, yeah, I've been doing the clubs long before.
So is it a matter of how many churches I've done,
or is it about what are the rules?
Well, that would be.
I mean, do you see why they would think you are?
No, no, no, I don't begrudge it.
Yeah.
A hundred percent.
But he's not in it, but he does with me.
He goes everywhere with me.
Yeah.
So that doesn't make sense.
Why they label him as a Catholic comment?
And there's nothing to act about.
The fact that someone's writing about him is amazing.
He wrote the article.
I think it's a blessing.
I don't care what you label me.
Pit name.
He goes, I'm in the top 10.
I'll take it.
Top 10 Catholic comedians.
That's an amazing.
Number nine.
Yeah.
But if someone was like oh this is like uh like
don't all like the women on the comedy shows like don't say like here's your first female comic and
then i just say i'm a comedian yeah don't say i'm the here's your first like like the latino comic
or like people gonna write like but that's on them to decide that's fine it's how you uh you
know i don't think like i was never uh southern comic but i mean i started
in new york oh yeah good point i was not in i didn't come up in through the south in the fact
that like coming up the south there's a lot of you you go to a lot of comedy clubs you're featuring
your yeah you got to come up that way where i was in new york and so i'm associated with that and i
think that's why i wasn't this thing.
It's not like I was never not a Southern comedian.
I mean, I sounded like this in New York, but I was there.
But you find out like, oh, Kid Rock's not from here.
He's from, or like, oh, Larry the Cable Guy's from Omaha.
You're like, oh, I don't think I care.
Do you?
That it's not – I need him to grow up on a farm in Alabama.
I love the show.
Well, Nebraska is.
Or whatever.
If it's not the South.
It's not the South, but it's pretty –
I think, yeah, he's a big Nebraska fan.
I mean, it's pretty – Midwest has their Southern kind of thing.
He might play to a Southern crowd because we like the things that he's doing.
Yeah.
But they do all those things, so he plays to them just as much.
But it's not inauthentic.
But he also went and sold out – I mean, he could sell out Madison Square Garden.
Yeah.
I mean, like, so that audience is everywhere.
But he didn't grow up in, like, San Francisco trying to do a thing.
Yeah, yeah.
It's not a completely different –
Yeah, yeah. It's him. It's with – yeah, yeah.'s it's him it's with yeah yeah you've golfed with him i just
golfed yeah it's within him yeah it's when you definitely him when you talk to him you're not
going like oh you're a different person yeah right but if you find out like like eric church i think
he grew up in like detroit with like a rich family or something like does that make the music i'm i love his i'm obsessed with his music am i like oh bummer or does it i don't know uh you're like you know harry church
is like someone i'm like i hear his name more than anybody then i'm like well i don't even know
what he's saying that's why that's the legend i think he's got a bunch you would know yeah yeah
but is it not yeah is he is that is that what people think of that he sold more tickets than
taylor swift in nissan stadium yeah i know that's what's crazy where i'm like who's where but is it not is that where people think of that he sold more tickets than Taylor Swift in Nissan Stadium
yeah I know that's what's crazy
where I'm like who
where is this guy
I'm not saying yeah I could love Eric Church
but like I just Eric Church is like
someone I'm like I don't know
I almost don't know what he looks like
John sing some of the worst lyrics
from one of his songs
thank you guys
coming out tonight what song is that you're like it's from the live it's uh you know it's hotel
california you're like oh yeah okay yeah you didn't do that part over winning so this song
i wrote me my buddies yeah it's a great song me my buddies wrote uh one night that's a funny guy
okay yeah you don't know that song?
You know, one night.
Well, sing more of it.
Stairway to Heaven.
Oh, yeah, just say that.
Why don't you say that part?
You know, bam, bam, bam.
Hotel California.
That's not really the words.
On a long, lonesome highway.
Yeah, just get to the point.
You remember that Springsteen song by Eric point. You remember that Springsteen song
by Eric Church?
You remember that
Springsteen?
Springsteen.
Maybe.
Yeah,
I mean.
All I want to do
is get a drink
in my hand.
You never heard that song?
Let me do it better.
All I gotta do
is put a drink
in my hand.
See?
Yes.
Oh,
that was terrible.
You're a music guy.
Come on, dude.
You're a Catholic music guy.
You're going to embarrass.
Catholic music comedian.
That's why you're not the top five.
Maybe number one Catholic music comedian.
Oh, maybe.
Think about it.
I don't know.
Gaffigan sings in his act.
But you play the piano.
Oh.
And you can do that stuff.
And then you ever think about what you could be in history?
Everybody has something that you could be like, like right now i'm the only person in history that's knocking on the table
with two hands yeah i'm the only person in the world at this moment that's doing this
weird and then you're gonna be like probably not huh probably maybe an eight billion people
there's probably somebody else not how many people are doing this and talking about this
and doing it
at this rhythm
everything
I thought about that
last weekend
I was in New York City
one night
then Opelika Alabama
and then Alaska
and I was like
I might be the only person
ever to make this
three day trip
ever
ever
I don't
yeah
ever
yeah
no one's ever done it
what do you think for me
as a comedian
that I could be
like my niche
the only guy's ever done huh. What do you think for me as a comedian that I could be like my niche, the only guy that's ever done?
Huh?
What is that?
He's the only Christian music or number one guy,
and John's whatever John does.
Okay.
Wow.
I need to find my own thing.
Yeah, to find your thing.
The top guy in my niche.
I think you could be the –
I think you could –
Well, from what I saw is all the married later in life, those jokes kill.
Yeah.
Kill.
Yeah, that audience.
Never single till they're 50, then get married.
I mean.
And meeting, is that true that you met earlier in life?
It's going to be a lot of discount tickets.
Yeah.
You know.
A lot of bogos.
A lot of.
Yeah.
Top bogo comics
out there
yeah
yeah the club called me
and said I won tickets
for my birthday
your birthday's in November
I don't know
said I got free tickets
top 10 bogo comics
yeah
what's bogo
buy one get one
yeah
oh yeah
yeah
it's still enforced
the two drink minimum
Yeah
On the scene
Just wait it out
Don't be a discount
But everybody still comes alone
No one can find the other person to go with I just got my... But everybody still comes alone.
No one can find the other person to go with.
It's the, you're the number one,
you might sit here comic.
That's how everybody sits.
That's the whole, everybody in the audience.
Is anybody sitting here?
No, no, no, you can sit there.
And that's how the crowd gets going.
Everybody here on the BOGO, everybody goes nuts.
I just got my sheet for Zany's, like the breakdown.
You see the ticket prices decrease the closer it got.
So it was like four people that bought it at 20,
and then by the end, people were just getting free That was your first
Did we ever tell that story
That you're on
You know you get paid for
So people might not know
But on Sirius Radio
And Pandora and all that kind of stuff
People play your albums you get money
And you're first when you signed up for it
Yeah
I was the first comic
who actually owed them money wait what happened so it's a thing called sound exchange yeah and
if there's any comics listening to this if you don't have anything up you sound up sign up for
sound exchange i think everybody kind of knows about sound exchange now yeah but it's a it's a
really great thing where they go and they track your plays on stuff,
and you get paid.
And there's a lot of comics that if they don't sign up for it,
there's just money they could have out there.
Yeah, yeah.
Where who's playing it?
Sirius, Pandora.
They just pick it up and start spinning it?
No, it's like you get paid.
You have to get paid.
The artist has to get paid.
Somehow that's how you do it.
Yeah, so Sirius.
Why'd you owe them money?
Well, I'm about to tell the story. Sir it gets played over there and then you sign up register
for sound exchange like he said so uh now you get paid monthly but used to get paid quarterly and
comics are always complaining like is this right i don't feel like i should be getting money
and i wasn't getting any payments for like months i'm like I don't understand. I know I'm still getting played. So I finally got someone
on the phone and they said,
well, we overpaid you
for a while because there's
another Brian Bates who's a musician.
So you actually owe us
$728. No way.
So for a year,
they were just taking it.
I didn't have to pay them, but they were just breaking it down.
So I would see my breakdown.
I'd be like, oh, I'm at minus 258 now.
You just started a tab.
Yeah.
He owned all money.
So I'm the only comic that's in the whole.
I owned Sonic Change for a year.
So besides Brian, everybody else is really up to speed.
Well, that could be his thing then.
Yeah.
That's your thing, dude.
Yeah, the BOGO comic.
Yeah, BOGO comic.
Oh, my.
Anybody sitting here?
These seats taken?
No, no, no.
Love you.
Are we still doing the social distance?
No, no, no.
Oh, all right, all right.
Would you, so like being a Christian comic,
like that's like with, were you trying not to be that because i mean you know
it's like people always talk about that you know the label of a christian comic yeah and uh you
know people put something around that very much so uh yeah like in the fact like it's bad yeah
like it's a bad thing and uh which it's not i mean obviously we've talked about like if people are not familiar
with uh tim hawkins or that'll go for all all christian art yes music movies you've it's like
oh it's like it's like it's like if you label yourself that yeah yeah that's and that's the
essentially what you don't want to do like in the fact that like or that's what i thought of
you know a lot of at the beginning
not that i it's not like when i moved to new york i'm doing it because i don't want to be this thing
yeah yeah but i uh i did like when i moved to new york i mean i was always still just clean and all
this stuff yeah so it's like i can just play in those places but you didn't want it like it's
like i don't want to be labeled that but there's a point that i did when i was clean i didn't want
to be labeled a christian yeah i'm not like you won't find anywhere on my website that i'm a clean comic that i'm a
christian comic i mean i talk about my and if that was what you want the category you want to
put me and then i got no problem with that yeah yeah it's not but yeah it's it but that's for
like you said that's them to decide yeah that's if you want if that's uncomfortable but then if
you're still in church like it's and then it's like I think it's almost like who you maybe put yourself around.
Yeah.
Maybe that,
as you come up,
like it's who you're around.
But I think a lot of people
should do that more.
Like they should get into that world.
Like there's a gigantic world for that.
And a lot of great,
and there's a lot better comics
like that are,
you know,
there's more,
are not better,
but there's more of them.
There's more comics now
that are in the Christian world,
and they're specifically playing to that audience,
which I think you were a big part of in the fact that, like,
you going to make fun of the church, like, when you're at,
when you start doing stuff, it almost made, it showed people, like,
oh, it's okay to go make fun of us in this church.
But, like, the first video I ever had that went viral was called Christian Music, How It's Made.
And it was very insider.
I was like, well, hey, it was a Christian music producer.
And everybody in the comments, I'll never forget this, were like, is this guy a Christian?
Because if he is, this is the funniest thing ever.
But if he's not, this is the most offensive thing ever.
So they were like, we need to know, is this guy in with thing ever. But if he's not, this is the most offensive thing ever. Yeah.
So they were like, we need to know, is this guy in with us or is he not?
Because if my brother is making fun of my mom, I'm dying laughing.
But if somebody else is making fun of my mom, I want to kill him.
Yeah.
Because it's like, oh, you're in it with us.
You've got to be one of us.
Yeah.
But that's all comedies like that. If you're making fun of a city or an ethnicity or to be one of us. Yeah. Yeah. But that's comic, all comedies like that.
If you're making fun of a city
or an ethnicity
or something that you're not.
Yeah.
But if you're with them,
like,
it's almost like,
it's hilarious.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's interesting to,
you know,
it's,
I mean,
you start out,
you don't,
I guess you don't know
what you want to be
and you don't want to be this thing.
But you want to be you though. You want to be you. Yeah. But it is, you know, I do think, I mean, you start out, I guess you don't know what you want to be, and you don't want to be this thing. But you want to be you, though.
You want to be you.
Yeah.
But it is, you know, I do think, I mean, comics should do it more like,
it's definitely a path that there's.
It's the only one that also has a moral code with it.
Yeah.
Yeah, the other one's like, yeah.
But you're like, oh, wait, what?
Hold on.
And also, no one knows what the code is.
Yeah.
Because like Justin Bieber.
Come on, Christian comedy?
Yeah.
Or Justin Bieber is a Christian.
Yeah.
Everybody knows that.
Yeah.
He progresses, he proclaims Christ and all of his.
Yeah.
But he's also like, but he came to Christianity later.
So he could like still like smoke weed or still like have a photo in his underwear.
Like, yeah, it was Justin Bieber.
And Christians love him because he's one of us.
But I'm not on that.
I grew up in it.
So I'm on the different code.
Well, if they found you, it's how they find you.
Yeah, maybe.
So they find you through that.
So they find, like a lot of, I would say a lot of people found you through church.
And you were going and doing the big tour.
I would say a lot of people found you through church.
Yeah.
And you were going and doing the big tour.
You were starting to get into that other world where you're doing theaters and not do churches.
Yeah.
But your whole first tour is all in churches.
So if you're in that world and doing that, then it's not he must be.
You are.
You are that.
You are that.
And why people like those jokes is because you are that.
And so then, yes, you are going to be held to a different standard. And the fact that you're coming there to do your thing.
Same way, I guess, a pastor could do versus Bieber, who's going to this place that's not associated with this.
Yeah, good point.
And then he happens just to be this thing.
this place that's not associated with this. Yeah, good point.
And then he happens just to be this thing.
I mean, I do think people tend to think people want, you know,
like it is true that Justin Bieber can do whatever he wants,
and the fact that like you still, it's almost like Christians would look
at Justin Bieber as like, well, we're lucky to have him be a Christian,
someone that big be a Christian.
If he makes a mistake, it's okay.
Hey, you can be forgiven.
We're not judgmental.
That's our kind of thing.
But if you you were
in it from the beginning you're like yeah you're like no no you know better you're not supposed to
do that and then yeah and then you get too many people on the outside that go wait a second what's
going on this guy you're trying to be a christian and you gotta you're not doing the things that
you should i think you're supposed to do with christian those would be why i have a problem
with all of christianity because everybody's yeah and everybody would be like john are you for everything that happened to me are you
are you mad at christians or do you hate i was like no i mean if you i don't think it was christians
they got i mean some got mad at you but i don't think christians they got mad at you it was it
was people that are not christians that are mad about christianity yeah yeah and that's who got
mad because they don't because then they think you're supposed to be better than this yeah and you weren't and so instead of saying like yeah so mistakes so like
for you know i would hope that most people that are christians would be forgiven 100 that's i
mean if they don't then what's the point of well if you say if you say like hey you're taking a job
at a company where like me performing in churches like you taking a job at a company where you have to wear khakis
and tuck your shirt in.
Yeah.
You can't be like, this is BS, dude.
I should be able to do it.
Well, you knew that when you took the job.
Yes.
And I knew that there was a thing, and I did not follow those rules.
And that's 100% fair.
Yeah.
Any consequence from that is 100%.
Yeah.
Like, yeah, you knew that you couldn't do that.
I go, yeah, that makes sense. You knew what the rules were yeah yeah fine you have to occasionally i noticed
correct i'm not self-correct but like i think you had a video recently recently about christian
culture i forgot what it was but you had to say thanks brian dude forget my jokes i apologize
but it's not a christian comment but you had to say guys you had to correct like i'm not making fun of oh sometimes
people sometimes people go too far they're like hey oh it was somebody like if you want to get
i was making fun of something in the christian circles and it was like yeah go like get make
fun of this like some i remember somebody like like there's a pastor they got like a dui yeah
and he got kicked out of his church and And they were like, John, roast him.
I go, are you misunderstanding what I am?
I'm not.
That's a guy that's struggling, that is having a hard... That's not funny to me.
That's not...
But I will make fun of a pastor that drives a Tesla, because that seems...
That's funny.
Yeah.
Yeah, but to me...
But that is funny.
Sometimes they're like, John, get him.
I'm like, I'm not the get him guy.
I'm not...
Get him.
Yeah. Or like, I don't... Yeah. That seems insane that they like, I'm not the get him guy. I'm not. Yeah.
Or like, I don't, yeah.
That seems insane that they told you to make fun of a guy that had a drinking problem.
Yeah.
Ah, buddy, here we go.
You read through the Bible.
I don't see that in there.
Yeah.
Yeah.
This pastor got caught stealing money, or I guess that would be funny.
But there's always like a.
I don't know.
A good example.
Drinking was such a good example.
There's a tricky part of like of like like let's say the the uh every first of all every denomination of christianity
has different rules catholics can drink baptists can't pentecostals can and so you're like all
right that's confusing and then there's like all right so the pastor should have a moral code that
he can't but then what about like the worship leader what about the drummer what about the guy that cuts what about the guy that cuts the grass yeah the guy that
cuts the grass at the church is he yeah what does he have to do can he have a beer with his buddy
yeah you yeah but everyone you're like it is very true what's well they would look at the guy
that cuts the grass like that goes even back to the Justin Bieber thing.
He gets treated the same way where it's like,
he's like, hey, I drink every night.
They go, that's okay.
A lot of people drink every night.
And then- What about the drummer?
He's-
Drummer might be okay.
I mean, look, it depends on how you are introduced to someone.
It's tricky.
It depends how good he is.
He's good.
It's fine.
No, I would say the opposite. If he's good, it's fine. No, I would say the opposite.
If he's good, it's not fine.
How important is he in the band?
Is he even mic'd up?
If he's not mic'd up and he's not whatever, then he can do it.
Church is the opposite.
Somebody came to me.
It's not like they don't go, he's good enough.
If you're good enough, you're held to the higher standard
because the most pressure is put on you
yeah because they we need you to be to represent this you have to carry people and then and you're
you're the voice to all these two somebody said to me at the other night after the liam morgan
show there's a bunch of comics and somebody said something that was like wildly across the line
she goes i'm not big enough to be canceled.
It's fine.
Meaning like, yeah, if the drummer is good enough.
Say their name and let's find out.
Yeah.
But they could be at some point.
I mean, they can go back and find stuff.
Revisionist. if you if you if they i mean they can go back that's where they can go back and yeah revisionist
yeah uh yeah it's it's i would i would say it's you know it is interesting to think like who is
allowed to do what it's all it's a but it's if you're honest and truthful yeah then they it
doesn't matter so like yeah the lawnmower guy goes, hey, I have eight beers every
night. I'm a believer. I love God. I'll come to church every Sunday. That's what I do. Not one
person would tell that guy to not do it. They would be like, yeah. It almost be like they love
it. You have some beers last night? You know it. This guy's gay. But he's at church. You know it. Yeah, you know it, bro.
That's what it would be.
That's the small talk.
That's the small talk.
You had some beers last night?
You know it.
So, dude.
Yeah.
Well, the guy that cuts the grass probably doesn't go to the church.
He probably hates it.
He's like, I'll just cut the grass.
I don't know.
It couldn't matter less, but I feel like I need to mention it.
At my old church, the guy that cut the grass was the drummer.
Really? Yeah. His name was Kennyny he did everything at the church he'd show up he'd be directing traffic he'd cut the grass and then he'd hop in and play drums yeah the drink i don't know
one of the top 10 drummer lawnmower guys out that guy might be the only drummer lawnmower
if there's a drummer lawnmower convention he would be hired i like how he on that information for 10 minutes well i was waiting for it i'm waiting for the
right moment yeah i got a drummer that's unbelievable yeah oh yeah he's like i got
something to say about this let's go what is about that uh but that goes back to the same
like with the like eric church stuff he's like what what i was what i was doing was
whatever most of the comedian but i was professing consciously or subconsciously to be a better person than I was.
Yeah.
I didn't necessarily say it, but everybody was like, this guy, he's in church.
He's probably going back to read the Bible after the show.
Yeah.
And it's the hypocrisy that people have.
If you're a fitness influencer and then somebody sees you in the McDonald's parking lot, you're like, wait, no, you said, or you're a health and fitness coach and then somebody sees you in the mcdonald's parking lot you're like wait no you said or you're a health your health and fitness coach and then somebody sees you
mcdonald's you're like wait you said you were eating kale this no i don't yeah yeah yeah no
yeah yeah and they call it out which is yeah fair but you weren't preaching i mean you weren't
telling people how to live their lives but you're yeah i'm just yeah yeah yeah but it's the hypocrisy
that but that's the christian or not everybody can't stand that nobody just yeah yeah yeah but it's the hypocrisy that but that's the christian
or not everybody can't stand that nobody likes that yeah it's it's it's the idea that you're in
the you're in the churches and like they're people are going like that if you go to a church you're
expecting uh you know what to expect as far as as the show and who's going to be there and who's
going to be represented you're not going to if he's at theaters and uh arenas and doing stuff outside of that it's a it's a completely different thing
but if you're going to the churches to perform then yes it's going to be it's going to it's
going to come with the territory which is like a good you know that all the politicians that said
like with the masks and then they didn't follow all the exact same thing yeah like we don't care if you go on vacation
yeah we care about this because you told us we couldn't yeah and now you are that's they were
like some of it is like and don't get caught like or something like it's in that way like some of
it's like look i don't even really care but don't get caught and don't make me care yeah that's
that's all i want don't make me care yeah if you make me see this happen, then you make me feel like a chump.
Because you're like, I tricked you or something like that.
No one really cares.
If Eric Church lives in Detroit in a mansion, no one really cares.
No, the music is good.
It's like, don't let me find out.
I don't need to know about it.
It doesn't need to be a whole thing.
Or if you go to the Eric Church, are you like really you're you're you're wearing vanderbilt do you know what their
assistant athletic director did and you're like what no i don't know if i'm responsible for that
i'd be like that's why i'm wearing the jersey yeah and they go what's that yeah i don't know
oh you drive a honda do you know what the CEO said about? Yeah.
I don't know.
What?
How was I going to say?
I don't know.
Well, I was going to say, I guess if people don't know what you're talking about, just Google.
Yes, I actually got pulled over today on the way. I got here before any of y'all.
I came from Atlanta.
My own house.
I was speeding to get here, and I show up,'s no one's here but i got pulled over and the cop goes he went
back to his car and he goes hey i don't usually do this but like i googled you because you've
recognized me and he goes you're comedian i go yeah he goes yay free to a comedian? I go, yeah. He goes, yeah, you're free to go. Wow. Oh, wow.
But I was like, well, look.
I go, well, look me up on socials.
Don't Google me.
That's what I said.
I was like, well, did you look up my, where did you go specifically?
Can I control what you are looking at?
If I would have been Googled, he was like, you're going.
You're the North Korean comedian.
Don't scroll down too much.
Stop about 2018.
I don't think that's how Google works.
Stop in 2018.
You do just a 2021 search or pre-2017 church.
Yeah, you can get into it.
Yeah.
Which is all, yeah.
But that's when you went and got all fixed up and now you're good.
And now I'm preaching, actually.
Now you're preaching.
Yeah, so now I am an actual preacher.
Now you got to the root of the problem, and it was performing at churches.
So now you're doing no churches.
Well, it started from saying mommy.
That's where it started.
That's where it started.
I think you created COVID.
You get canceled, then we all do.
Dude, I got ahead of it.
I just got ahead of it by a couple months, dude.
But see, this is where now you're being honest, and you talk about it. Yeah, I go of it. I just got ahead of it in my couple months, dude. But see, this is where now you're being honest and you talk about it.
Yeah, you go find it.
And that's, but that's, people just want to be, they don't want to feel tripped.
Yeah.
And that's how they felt.
And that, yeah.
And to be fair to anyone that, like, I'm putting myself in somebody's shoes that's a mom that, like, is in the community.
You know what I'm saying?
It's in the community.
Yeah, big in the community, in the church.
She finds my videos, shares the videos with everybody.
And that's how I got popular, people sharing my videos.
At church, look at this guy, John Chris.
He's hilarious.
We love him.
And then to read that about me is probably a bummer.
Oh, yeah.
A huge bummer.
And you go, that's all rehab is is like put yourself in the
other person's shoes yeah and you go oh yeah yeah i would like you said you felt now i didn't i did
it trick people on but but i go if i was her i would be pissed yeah because i shared my platform
with you to everyone i know yeah all the time this guy's and that's how i got popular so fast
yeah you're like what well, think about them.
Why would they be like, oh, yeah.
I would be mad too.
Yeah.
Because you were saying you were something that you were not.
Yeah.
And now it's like, yeah, here's who I am.
They're like, all right, yeah, that sounds good.
Yeah.
Not as, but like everybody, everybody's a human.
And what's been your response since you've been back?
Well, that's what's wild is because when i got out of so i don't know
about catholicism but christianity is very very shame based at least how i grew up so if you did
something bad you don't say you hide it right yeah and so everything that came out about me i was like
this you can imagine i was like suicidal when i was in re i was like this is the worst day and
it's nothing worse a christian fame and sex you're like this is, this is the worst day. It's nothing worse. A Christian, fame, and sex.
You're like, this is the perfect storm of everything.
And I was like, and I got out.
I'll never forget this.
I went to Five Guys.
The Chick-fil-A was closed.
I went to Five Guys.
It was on a Sunday.
And there was this family.
It was in Hattiesburg, Tennessee.
Hattiesburg, Mississippi.
And they were like, John.
And I was like, oh, no, they're going to say I'm a bad Christian
or a bad influence on their kids or a bad role model.
And they were like, we just want to let you know that we missed you
and we've been thinking about you.
And I was like, and we've been praying for you.
And I was like, what?
Yeah.
It was very confusing.
Yeah.
Because I thought I had to keep all this stuff a secret
and if everybody knows, it'd be the end of me.
Yeah.
Because we were talking about that.
When you were growing up, your parents would close the door of
your room and be like hey if anything god's watching yeah which is a scare kind of a tricky
thing to say to a five-year-old yeah god and if he catches you doing anything he's coming for you
it'd be fun to talk to those people now they're like yeah we just didn't check the phone when we
saw him at that moment yeah we definitely said different we did not follow the news yeah i mean oh yeah yeah we just on vacation
you know it was a sunday it was a slow day i just haven't really like looked at stuff yet and if i
would have i never would have approached him like that i wouldn't have let him meet my children
it was like what it was very it's very like oh wait what it was very good because
then you're like oh because then if people like the people like which is now is like people
my platforms are bigger and people because all they ever wanted was you to be just say who you
are and then everybody like if you're if you had a friend or anyone come to you with honesty
and humility be like hey I'm struggling with everything.
Everybody would be like, we love you, dude.
Yes.
Everybody.
Any comedian that did the worst thing you could ever possibly imagine came to you sincerely.
Yeah.
And be like, hey, they'd be like, every human has unlimited forgiveness for that.
Comedians are pretty, yeah.
The comedians are a special breed in that we're very not judgmental and uh we're always willing to hear out always yeah well i think but not that
we're just ruthless against now the other people that the stuff happens to we do think of them
then we will and but i think comics are also good in the fact that you're like
yeah dude like you just can't do that though like you're like you're being straight up front and
honest there's very and and they're very like i feel like all comics i was listening to seinfeld
podcast like you get the i'd say we all have this gift of comedy or creativity or whatever it is
in that basket also kind of comes depression or comparison or anxiety or whatever that is kind of
just a part of it yeah that you're like always needing yeah love and support that's just kind of a part of the thing yeah and every comic has this
generational gift or talent but there's also this other thing that they're kind of trying to
keep at bay yeah a little bit so they can keep doing the thing and whenever you see a comic
whether it's drugs or
alcohol or addiction or whatever trump the i know how much these people love comedy every comic you
know how much you know how good it feels and if they did something that jeopardizes that i have
no i have compassion yeah i'm not well yeah most comics i always think of that when they if they
if they do a joke and it's like that joke crossed the line,
you always got to think, in the comics mind, they are truly trying to be funny.
Yes. And they are only thinking about the joke.
Doing.
They don't think of the consequences of that joke.
Yeah.
And it doesn't come from a place of hate.
It doesn't come, it comes from a pure like trying to be funny.
And I mean, there's jokes that are wildly over the line.
But you got to understand that person.
I mean, not saying, I don't know if everybody,
but what I believe these comics to believe,
or what they think is they truly were like,
oh, I'm going to do this
because this will be the funniest thing to go do at that moment.
And they have no attachment to even what they are saying there's
not even like i got it they have no agenda they're just like if you talk to them in two days and said
you remember you said that they would if they didn't get in trouble for it yeah they would be
like oh i don't did i say that like it's because it's all just about i gotta be funny and so like
whatever i have to do yeah to be funny because a lot of times saying the obvious is the thing that's the funniest.
So sometimes it's going to work, sometimes it's not going to work.
But it comes from a place of pure like, dude, I was just trying to be funny.
I don't have any feelings about this stuff at all.
Like I don't – and people have a hard time accepting that.
People have a hard time when they hear that.
They go, you don't mean that at all though, man. And in the comics, like, I don't mean any of like, but. Accepting that. People have a hard time when they hear that. They go, you don't mean that at all though, man.
And they get into comics like, I don't mean any of this, dude.
I don't.
Or like, I don't, I don't not, but I'm not like.
I don't like live by that.
Like sometimes I, like I get.
Don't you think?
I'm trying to say the opposite of the room to make you laugh.
So if I want to make you laugh, I got to go say the opposite thing that, thing that you don't expect me to say i have to go say it yeah and i'm just trying to get once
i get you to laugh and i think it's going to be this like this big kind of thing and then i move
on and then i mean something by the end of the set you might even be like i don't know what did
i remember that yeah but then it's truly coming from a place of like i'm just trying to make a
joke yeah and that's when people talk but there would also be
things where you would say hey listen i don't support what he said or what his behavior was
but but i but this yeah you're not saying oh you're not saying anyone should be able to say
whatever they want you're not saying that no you're like that was you should probably have
some consequences for that well but you can't say yeah you deal with it yeah but you can't say
throw the whole guy this guy shouldn't be able to do comedy ever again yeah well i always think
that too like there's a weird balance of that where people talk about free speech they say
like comics are yeah you know like uh comics can say they say whatever they want like comics always
send us act like like ah they're trying to tell us not to say something y'all say the craziest
stuff i've ever heard about life yeah like there you ever been to a comedy show yeah everybody's saying
no one's stopping you from saying but if people do get upset about it yeah uh i mean there's a
weird balance where i i just wish an audience would understand there's not hate in that person's
heart for he's just trying yeah yeah he or she is just trying to say the craziest thing to you yeah and what
kind of comedy they do kind of describes how crazy of a thing they might say and yeah so like
something that us we're probably not going to say that crazy of a thing because i'm not saying that
crazy thing even in my regular act versus someone that all four of us filthy who are all clean
people have walked out on our shows at least mine yeah then they were like that's
too far well that's come full circle yeah but they're here what are they googling during the
show oh wait what no i think they know i need your act yeah uh google it i think they would
have stayed some of them would have stayed I didn't know he was a cool guy.
But if you say, so you say, people say John Crist is across the line.
Yeah.
But I wouldn't say that.
But also, I hear jokes that I go, that's across the line.
But then if, I remember going to a comedy show at Zany's.
I've talked to Whit Lucy about this before.
I thought that it was a joke about Christianity.
I thought it was way across the line.
And I just got up and I went home.
I didn't...
But it was killing.
It was killing in there.
So I can't say the joke wasn't funny.
And nor do I get on Twitter and say, we shouldn't...
Because 300 people bought tickets and it got a standing ovation yeah so
i can't say that was across to me it was yeah but you everyone should have the ability if they think
something's been yeah yeah by all comics just don't get offended very easy yeah like so like
we we would never like think to go do something like that because we're just not we're in a world
of uh hearing crazy things and so like being offended like just
we we could and i know that i know that comedian is one of the nicest comedians in the world yeah
and you've unbelievable philanthropist and like yeah it does like you can't say yeah whatever the
label you're trying to put that comic intended to yeah hurt he he or she did not and i don't think
ever if he wants people to laugh and have a good time
and enjoy you got as a comic it's a weird bounce you get you got to deal with the consequences
of it and then uh you you if you say something crazy yeah yeah you got if people get upset about
it and the social media you whatever man they get upset you're saying stuff crazy uh you know
i don't know you have to deal with it like it's part of it you're saying stuff crazy uh you know i don't know
it's like you have to deal with it like it's part of it it's a weird but i think you should be allowed
to say whatever you want to go say but you also have to deal with all that stuff but you got to
deal with it and like you know i don't know it's a weird you know i mean you know sometimes you
got a thing you sometimes you got to read the room sometimes you gotta you gotta have the comedic
timing or the comedic you know like to go like yeah there's times where you're like you know
what maybe this wasn't as you're right for that yeah that was definitely you can feel when
something's mean yeah just don't be mean that's really you gotta say stuff it's like but if it
comes out mean yeah that's like a long time ago i've talked about it when i talked about my wife
when i would do wife jokes people be like well why are you it sounds like you hate her
why are you married and i go that's these. Why are you married? And I go, that's, these jokes should be coming off like that.
So I need to tell these jokes where they are not coming off like that.
And so sometimes in comedy,
that needs to be done where you can,
like,
you can say the crazy thing and look,
if you,
and if you want to go as insane as you want to go insane,
then go be insane.
And you're going to have the audience that you're going to have.
Which is what you were talking about,
about the Christianity.
The thing I tried to clarify, I go, people were like, go after, and I go, whoa, and you're going to have the audience that you're going to have. Which is what you were talking about, about the Christianity, the thing I tried to clarify.
People were like, go after, and I go, whoa, I'm not that guy.
I'm not trying to, like, if enough people told you, was it a couple or several that said you sound like mean about your wife?
And you're like, well, that's not my intent.
Yeah, I mean, it was enough that I was aware of it. It wasn't like there was no internet.
Or like it was, I mean, I would say some,
well, I don't know if the internet was this crazy.
Social media wasn't the same.
But that was not your-
Well, in 2003, it wasn't-
There was no social media.
There was no social media, but I mean,
when I moved to New York in 2005 or 2006,
when did YouTube really, like when commenting really started?
08?
Maybe.
Mid to late 2000s.
Yeah.
So it's like even like, yeah, it's like even at that beginning,
but it wasn't like you were getting a ton of comments.
It wasn't this thing that we were always super aware of.
If you'd have done your thing 10 years earlier,
nobody would have known about it.
That's why I made that mistake.
Well, I grew up in church.
Like that's the mistake. You go, you know know what i was just born at the wrong time he started his lesson but it's also somebody told me that like somebody told me that i was like
not me not to make the comparison but like steph curry if steph curry would have come around this
if steph curry would have come around in the 80s, he would not have been successful.
Right?
The NBA was not set up with the way the fouls were.
They were not set up to be.
He came on at the right time where he was small,
and there was no hand checking,
and there was no Bill Lambert and Dennis Rodman,
that he could be successful.
I think he's talented.
People take away the fact that the guy's talented enough
that he would figure it out.
People take that stuff away.
That he would just check him.
Yeah, people tend to think LeBron could have played in those days, or all these people could have played in all these different eras.
You're not that, this is back to Larry Cable guy, kind of same kind of carrot top kind of thought.
You're not as good as you are now, and then you couldn't have figured it out and when people grew up in those times they knew how to live in that time and it
wasn't like a person from the future walking around going oh why are y'all allowed to do all
this kind of crazy stuff right they would have just adjusted that's the way everybody kind of
does yeah there's a lot everybody has to adjust with the kind of times and you know maybe comics are you know before their time or past their time
where the joke is not is not it's not sharing like oh my goodness this is like it might be a
little too early for that yeah or that joke is already you're be past your time so it's like a
perfect example of like that like you could make fun of Christianity from with inside Christianity.
It was not really happening before me.
Or not in the way that, like, would be like, oh, you can love Jesus, but also make a joke about Joel Osteen.
It was supposed to be like, hey, we're all together.
We have to show a unified front to the world but that and that but that's and
that's exactly why so many people were with their action to what happened to you yeah hurt because
of that yeah because they were like he's they they they trusted you in the fact that you were
yeah and almost like i almost get it more right there but it was like they trusted you in the
fact that like you were like hey we let you in you're making
fun of us because you are us yeah then yeah and then it's like then you found out they might and
then something was you you found out uh based on the moral code you're not one of us i was one i
still wasn't still in one of them but that we decided hey no you're but that's where you it's
you which i would i believe is most comics i mean most christians would it is uh you forgive and you
100 and you uh understand that you go through stuff and you think about yeah the people that
were truly affected by it by those girls and like that you hope that they are everybody all around
and yeah everybody forgives and everybody can move forward and you look at all the the whole like
rehab process is basically they're just saying, well, look at this from the other person.
Yeah.
That's all.
And you're like, I got in trouble.
This is not really comedy, but it's like I got in trouble for behaving narcissistically in rehab.
And they go, for example, they would go, yeah, I know.
It's wild.
Is that what you're laughing at?
Yeah.
Like even in rehab, you're.
So they. It's wild. Is that what you're laughing at? Yeah, like even in rehab, you're – So like we would go to – we would go, like we're all going to play volleyball at 5.30.
Yeah.
And I show up at 5.45.
Yeah.
They go –
Checking your phone.
They go – we didn't have our phones.
But they go, why do you think that's okay?
Everyone else showed up at 5 30 i was like
i don't know they'll and everybody somebody else put out the nets someone else got the ball someone
i just figured but they're like they go look at it from his perspective he set everything up and
you just i go oh yeah yeah i didn't think about it like that. And that's the whole thing.
We sent him to rehab for this podcast.
Yeah.
What?
Because I don't think about what.
You set it all up.
Huh?
You just roll in.
Yeah, dude.
You just roll in.
It's your podcast.
Never enough for this guy.
He's on the podcast.
He does.
It opens for him.
Never enough.
He wants more.
Like, I'm sorry.
Let me give you more. Yeah, never enough. Yeah. You should be enough. He wants more. Like, I'm sorry. Let me give you more.
Yeah, never enough.
Yeah.
He should be grateful.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, that would be the problem I would have at the real end.
Just trying to bring some humor to this podcast.
But if two people are...
There's been humor the entire...
I'm joking.
That's what you always say.
I mean, because, yeah.
Because I'm the only one that brings it.
Yeah.
I mean, Aaron does it, but...
Aaron Land's great. Aaron that brings it. Yeah. I mean, Aaron does it, but Aaron lands great.
Aaron lands awesome.
Yeah.
He thinks we're supposed to always be equals in the fact that I have to do everything he does.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He looks at comedy like it's a job at Verizon.
Yeah.
We're all equals.
And there's no such thing as talent, but everybody deserves equally whatever everybody gets. But he can, like, if the flight, if the car for the airport is leaving from the hotel lobby at 6, you can be late.
I can be late. You can't be late.
Yes, but he would think, but he, I don't think he believes that.
No.
He doesn't, he doesn't think, like, the fact that I'm, like, yeah, I'm paying for the car.
I've set up the car.
You'd be driving the Uber.
That's what Brian would do.
Yeah.
Dude, if this was a situation in rehab, the therapists live for that kind of stuff.
Because they were like, oh, well, why?
They just pick at you and tell you to get something.
Yeah.
They're like, oh, why do you?
Are you glad that article was written?
A hundred percent.
Well, I said, I was very, did you ask him to say that?
Is that allowed?
No.
I've never talked to him outside of this.
Well, I remember the day of, there's a message.
They emailed us, and they're like, hey, we're going to release this article tomorrow or something like that.
And they were like, they were going to release it, I don't know, let's say 10 a.m. or something.
And I was like, of course.
I didn't have my phone, but my sister was keeping me updated.
And it came 1 o'clock, 2 o'clock.
And then I was like, well, maybe they're not going one o'clock two o'clock and then i was like
well maybe they're not gonna maybe it's just not gonna come out and then i and then i imagined
living in that world and i didn't want to worry yeah and for the rest i go i go everybody put it
out yeah put everything whatever you've decided or discovered about me put it all out and not once
from that time forward have we ever deleted anyone's comment or or tried to block anyone or says everyone say whatever you want and this work
this life is way better yeah because i lived i said the only thing worse about what happened to
me it was the last 10 years prior because i was drinking and like doing all that kind of stuff
and i and i felt if these people, these people would all crush me.
And that's what I lived for my whole comedy career like that.
And that was horrific.
Yeah.
Horrific.
Horrific.
Yeah.
And knowing that if, but then I was like, hey, if I got one fan after this, this is
preferable to living like that.
Yeah.
Being scared of, yeah.
Yeah.
So I go, just put it everybody put everything
out and do it everybody say everything that they need to say yeah and it's yeah yeah and mike plus
you can't i say the show i go you're gonna send a comedian to rehab it's like breaking up with
taylor swift she's gonna she's gonna write some hits yeah like it's i can't that's gonna be
that's unbelievable for an
experience for a comedian because that's the way we handle pain yeah it's like all the things that
you joke about that you are real yeah real issues they tell you rehab like not to think like that
you're like you know what i'm be glad that those girls he's got he's like you're like you know
what's the best thing you're having to me these girls are still like you know it's the best thing you're having to do
these girls are still like you're like could you say i'm sorry or something like oh so yeah
obviously sorry but i've been murdering on stage lately so uh i have been that's not what i meant
but sure oh yeah the girls too i have been slaughtering but this new closer is killing
yeah yeah yeah no I don't
you didn't mean that
I wouldn't wish it on
that process
no I know
you didn't mean that
nothing
yeah
yeah
that is my closer though
that is
yeah
do you bring the girls out
no
why is it
Aaron
yeah
I know
this this one
might be rated PG
here we go
I thought we were
going to talk about
Georgia
we never got to
we never got to
Georgia
we got to comedy
more interesting
yeah
I had the Georgia
Wikipedia pulled up
ready to go
Turns out
Georgia's got a lot of you
John
I got
Dude I got a lot
I wrote a lot of notes
On Georgia
Yeah we'll do it again
We'll do it
I'll come back and do it
Next time
But don't let anyone else
Come on and defend
I gotta
I need to talk about Georgia
Yeah
Do people trash it
No no
We just talk about
No we don't
We don't trash Yeah No We're not you're we're not
your comedy uh we this is the whole podcast you just trash yeah i do we just trash yeah i trash
for sure table for sure but we don't i'm happy to talk a lot about the table too i'm happy yeah
we actually do talk physically about the table yeah man metaphysically yeah that's good because
it's a podcast.
It's like audio, but let's talk about what's in the room.
Smart.
Let's talk about smart.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's real.
People can really relate to that.
Like, well, I'm listening, so I can't say it.
You have, so your tour.
Tour starts middle of September.
Middle of September.
Yeah, Fresh Cuts Comedy Tour in 35 cities.
Tickets are on sale.
Tickets are on sale.
I'm sorry. Let's go. Let's's go why didn't you call this tour did you almost name it let's
go let's go tour did you almost go i think so i think i'm on the announcement of the of the
tour i said let's go we're going on tour i had uh the people that run my social media they put
let's go for my special yeah and uh and i think about it every day when and that was in march and they and uh and i approved it yeah but i did it oh weird that was
back before it was still no i didn't like approving it before and sometimes it's one of those things
that like you you know when you're like i don't think i should be doing this well you know and
you still do it yeah uh and they i mean dude I'm
I mean
it's kind of
just working out
I mean that's
unbelievable
it's one of the
best jokes I've ever
said in my life
you get it
you know
this crowd gets it
that's my favorite
thing a comic can say
that guy gets in the back
like that's such a funny
one guy
that's a trick
that's a trick
but I'm kind of okay
with that trick
because everybody
kind of does it it's such a funny thing to go that guy gets in trick. That's a trick. But I'm kind of okay with that trick. Because everybody kind of does it.
It's such a funny thing to go, that guy gets in the back right there.
Anybody?
You know what I'm talking about.
What about the trick of asking anybody?
There was a joke.
I knew a comic that used to do the joke.
I always thought it was so funny on stage.
He did crowd work.
Russ Beneave.
Very funny New York comic.
And he would always ask the guy in the front row, this is, I mean,
when I moved to New York,
04, 05.
And he'd be like, what's up, buddy?
He goes, you like girls?
No, I do.
And he would just say, no.
No one, he doesn't let the guy answer or hear.
But it was just a very funny, quick,
like just staying on top of him.
You like girls?
No, I do.
Oh, you know, what about this last trick?
You know that one awkward person in your family?
If you don't know her.
Oh, you're them.
You're them, dude.
If you're not laughing, then blah, blah, blah.
You know that one crazy person?
You know the one guy that if you don't know him?
Yeah.
But you would say that's not stolen because that's just out there.
That's just out there.
You can't.
That's not.
No one claims that.
You can't do it because it's like you shouldn't.
It's been done too much.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I mean, we used to always do those jokes about in a small room.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Where you'd be like, I would have done this in my car.
Like, you know.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Like, that was a big New York joke.
Or like you come.
I remember some comic goes, dude, that's my joke.
And I was like, that's everybody's joke.
We all do a version of that joke.
Or what about, yo, Des Moines?
Des Moines's got a zoo?
What's at your zoo?
Two squirrels and a rabbit?
Like that's a, unless you go to Columbus or San Diego.
Yeah, there you go.
Our zoo's pretty amazing.
One of the top zoos in the country.
And we do, we have a squirrel and we have
multiple rabbits we have a jackrabbit i remember the one jackrabbit like no i'd like to go though
we'd all crush it we'd crush on like remember we were every city we go to we just like i like that
thing that y'all did making fun of the city driving around i actually like that yeah yeah
you showed it at the at the show time and then not to fill some time
this podcast rules dude but it but but why don't y'all put all those out well because it's video
but then the audio is from the crowd yeah it's confusing like why is the crowd laughing you're
in a car but y'all have all
those cities like why yeah why don't but why don't you like are those are all those out like
someone watched them they're not out and it was some clips of them you put out some clips of some
of them i think that would be that would be funny yeah because that was a funny well i don't think
but they're only funny because because the audience is dying because if it's just me and
aaron driving around just trashing on a city,
especially if you're not at the show, it looks very...
A lot of times people are mad at those because they're like,
we, I'm the mayor, and then you just make fun of our whatever.
Aaron is making fun of the murals in the city.
I think I'd want to watch it here in the crowd.
Yeah.
All right.
Maybe we'll do that for the next tour.
But they would always say, well, a lot of some of them were similar, I feel like. They were like, oh, you just do that for the next tour but they would always say they would always say like well a lot of some of them were similar i feel like they were like oh you just do that in every
city oh a lot of you wouldn't want to show that yeah a lot of them were pretty unique because
everybody every city is gonna yeah yeah do some kind of like did i like i mean i've done it my
show that's like crowd work i mean crowd work is essentially that like it's like yeah it's gonna be
if if someone really want and watched someone do crowd work
at all these cities, it would look very similar.
Are you against that too?
Oh, crowd work?
Yeah.
I've talked about it.
I'm not against it.
I know it's a big thing.
There should be a list of things you're allowed to do.
I know.
There's a lot of.
Nate Bargatze's list of things you can't do.
I've learned.
I have a lot of rules that people don't know that they have to follow.
Yeah.
And I think they have to follow.
Do you not like when people were-
My shorts on stage is my big one.
Yeah, yeah.
I get really annoyed when I see people wear shorts.
Yeah, shorts on stage, that's insane to me.
Sandals.
Yeah.
You wear your sandals on stage?
No.
No, I don't think I've ever worn shorts.
I don't think I've ever wore short sleeves on stage.
I don't even love short sleeves.
This is the first time I wore them.
I wore them one other show on even the podcast.
What about a hat on stage?
I don't mind a hat.
The only reason I don't is because it's like your eyes.
It covers your eyes.
I've heard that.
But I don't mind a hat.
People always think I wear a hat on stage
they always go
you wear a hat on stage
I've never
I've never wore
I mean
it's a very few
amount of times
but I've maybe posted
a picture of a time
that I did
and so everybody thinks
oh you just wear a hat
all the time
you're the hat comic dude
I'm the hat comic
yeah
there's comics
that are the hat comic
very true
you don't want to be that
you don't want to ever be
the specific this hat comic or the BOGO comic.
Is the seat taken?
Is this?
Is the seat taken to a tour?
It's a lot of the, you know what?
I don't think they're going to make it.
It's the broken plans show.
45 minutes into the show.
I don't think they're coming. I don't think they're there. It's a broken plan. It's the show. I don't think they're coming.
I don't think they're there.
The broken plans.
It's reserved, but I don't think.
Your opener knows when he's done to go,
all right, guys, obviously your party's not coming tonight,
so let's push together and see if your opener knows to say that.
Everybody move up.
Everybody move up.
Everybody, you know, can everybody grab their water bottles?
We all bought
one water
when you walked in.
Can everybody grab
their water bottles?
I've done this
before.
I feel like everybody has.
Has done a show
where you scoot
everybody up?
Oh, yeah.
Well, you have to
because audiences
don't realize.
Yeah, it's going to be
better if everyone's close.
Yeah, this is all
the audiences.
If it's a small room, don't spread out.
I know you want to.
You will have a better experience if you scoot together.
A table of 10 together is better than 20 spread out.
Yeah, true.
And just do a show for that.
That's philosophy.
Yeah, write that down.
That is pretty nice.
Yeah, put that down.
Write it down.
A table of 10 is better together than a room of of 20 in a room of 20 spread out wow that's deep that's pretty
nice yeah it's better than whatever you said earlier uh what'd you say fishing pole fishing
pole is a fish but a man still fishing spot would probably be. Oh, fishing spot. Tell him where the fishing spot is. That would be because that's the cadence with the fishing hole.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You get the fishing hole from him, and he's like.
He's just catching all these fish.
He's like, how am I doing this?
I'm supposed to be a good fisherman.
You're like, no, you're not.
You just figured out where the fish are.
Yeah.
Yeah, that's better.
Okay.
All right.
Yeah, John Crist.
Yeah, my tour date. go get hit check out his
tour uh i got tour stuff uh we're announcing i think it comes out grand ole opry at uh
grand ole opry in nashville which is gonna see do y'all want to do the rhyming and the grand
ole opry no are you doing the are you doing a show there yeah yeah but i think because i'm my i am too
yeah but you have to you can't say the grand ole opry because that's confusing to people they think Are you doing a show there? Yeah. Yeah, but I think because I am too. Yeah.
But you can't say the Grand Ole Opry because that's confusing to people.
They think you're on the show.
Oh.
You've got to do your house.
Yeah, you have to say it.
Yeah, all right.
Don't say the Grand Ole Opry because they're like.
I'm doing a show at the Opry House.
Yeah, there you go.
At the Ryman.
When they clicked the link, I figured they'd figure it out.
And they.
So go.
This podcast is unreal.
By the way, my first job was at Oprylandland so it's kind of a cool thing to go i used to sweep the steps of the grand ole opry
yes i worked at opryland at 16 or 15 wow got paid 325 an hour and i was a sweeper you'd sweep
inside the park i also swept outside the park would go to the grand opera did you get promoted to outside the park or do you start as a comedian at the yeah no i
know i didn't i was i did work in the dog kennel too lost a dog lost a dog uh so but you want to
yeah you want to do this that'd be amazing man let me check that's good yeah uh i've done the
rhyming that's true i wanted to ask Aaron anyway, just Aaron.
No, I would love to.
I actually bought tickets for your show.
Oh, really?
I just assumed I wasn't on it.
To the...
To the rhyming show.
I'm just going to be in there.
Oh, do you have tickets to it?
Oh, why do you have tickets?
When is it?
Well, it sold out.
I wanted to grab some.
Well, we got two tickets for sale.
Hey, you want to give?
Why don't you give?
We should give the ticket, two tickets to somebody.
Okay.
Let's see.
On the podcast.
We're doing it right now, live?
No, we have to.
What are they supposed to do?
You mean to two folks, right?
Yeah, to two folks.
What are we going to do?
I don't know.
I don't know.
We'll think about it.
Just note, they're not great seats.
How about it?
I couldn't afford his download
A list of
Write a list
Graphically decide
By the way
We don't make the prices
We make prices of the tickets
But those tickets get
Taken
Stubhub
There's a big mess of a thing
Just say whoever
Come up with a list
Of Nate's do's and don'ts
Of stand up comedy
And somebody has to
Submit that for the tickets
I mean we've got the whole
Tagline thing going
Yeah
Maybe we could Maybe do whole tagline thing going.
Maybe we could.
Maybe do the tagline.
But that's not fair.
Yeah, exactly.
But whoever wins it, if they're not here in Nashville,
then we'll give them tickets.
We'll just give someone your tickets. Yeah, the prize should be better than the tickets you're having to go get at Brian's.
They're obstructed view.
Yeah.
Are they?
Standing only.
They're not, are they?
They might be.
They might be.
I can't afford the good ones but
i wanted to come see you before yeah yeah yeah how funny would that have been if somebody
who's a fan of your podcast comes to see it they're arriving and they just see brian
head behind the pole peering around trying to isn't that guy on his body yes yeah can he not
have him backstage and he didn't give him
better seats than that
not only did I not give him
seats at all
he didn't buy them
and I was going to
take my mom
because it's her birthday
well you can give them
to your mom then
I guess the tickets
okay
yeah
oh we'll just give the
tickets to your mom
I don't feel bad
yeah well never mind
we're going to give them
to
we'll give
yeah yeah no it'll be good give the tickets to your mom well, never mind. We're going to give them to... We'll give...
Yeah, no, it'll be good.
Give the tickets to your mom.
Okay.
Because then your mom, someone's coming.
Have she seen you at the Ryman?
No.
Oh, there you go.
No.
October 28th is the show.
Yeah, October 28th.
And 27th is the Opry House.
Let's do it.
That's awesome.
Randall Opry.
Congrats on that.
Yeehaw.
Let's go.
I'll be on Yeehaw October 27th.
Is that true?
Okay, yeah. All right. All right. Thanks, everybody. Yeehaw Let's go I'll be on Yeehaw October 27th Is that true? Okay
Alright
Alright
Thanks everybody
Thanks everybody
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