The Nateland Podcast - #53 The Human Body

Episode Date: June 30, 2021

This episode, the guys become doctors and break down the human body. Nate, Aaron, and Brian discuss which organs are vital, which organs we no longer need, and debate how many elephants we eat in a li...fetime.   Co-hosts: Brian Bates ( https://www.instagram.com/brianbatescomic) & Aaron Weber ( https://www.instagram.com/realaaronweber)   Podcast produced by Nate & Laura Bargatze https://www.natebargatze.com https://www.allthingscomedy.com https://www.genovationsmedia.com https://www.centerstmedia.com Email - Nateland@NateBargatze.com #nateland #natebargatze     Keeps:  keeps.com/nate If you are ready to take action and prevent hair loss, get your first month of treatment for free. Go to keeps.com/nate     Vuori: vuori.com/nate Get  20% off your first purchase and enjoy free shipping on any U.S. orders over $75. go to vuori.com/nate

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 let's go folks welcome to nateland podcast i'm nate uh brian aaron weber uh welcome everybody to the podcast. I started with the let's go. I don't know if that's going to be the... I mean, truthfully, all this being said, I do think I get to decide what I want to say. I mean, that is true. So I enjoy talking about it and being in the mix. How did it feel just now?
Starting point is 00:00:48 Let's go, folks. It it feels great i like it uh i like it i like the specific it's uh we did what you threw a poll up on instagram and twitter and so what what were the to let's go and hello folks. Here's the Instagram results. 1,400 people. Oh, I mean, over 2,000 people voted. 62% hello folks. 38% let's go folks. What I would say is a lot of this is it's people that don't want change. And that's, you know, Laura, you know who over here? People that are stuck in their ways.
Starting point is 00:01:28 All three of our Ys voted for hello, folks. Oh, did they really? Yeah. Yeah. Did they listen to it? That's the thing, too. Did people listen to the... And hear the explanation and hear the context for it? Yeah, and everything.
Starting point is 00:01:40 I don't know if Laura did. Yeah, Laura doesn't. Here's the Twitter. Hello, folks. Same thing. Everybody still likes hello, folks, because we've been doing hello, folks. Hello, folks. I'm not saying I'm against.
Starting point is 00:01:54 I like hello, folks. I think let's go, folks, just stands out more. I think it's different. Hello, folks is we're just saying the same greeting that's been said for 100 years. Yeah. Right? Well, a lot of it is in the inflection that you do it. I think that is unique in a way.
Starting point is 00:02:17 Let's go, folks. Well, even the hello, folks. Hello, folks. How do people get, hello, folks? Yeah. I mean, who talks like that? Yeah. Yeah. I'm not changing the folks i know it's the you like hello i like look i like let's go folks uh but i wouldn't be upset either
Starting point is 00:02:36 way i think they're both i think they're both good i hear it a lot now in the wild people using it and it's cool yeah yeah yeah but they're using it but you're that's that's almost kind of the thing you hear it a lot you just notice it more that's uh people people said that with one fell swoop and i did the one fell swoop joke and i've noticed it too once i started doing the one fell swoop joke i heard a lot more people use one fell swoop yeah and so it's like that kind of thing when you say hello folks and we say it here you start hearing other people say it but they're not saying it because they're they're one of us no i'm saying fans fans of the podcast that i meet are using it so i i like it either way i just no
Starting point is 00:03:17 no i know that no i know the fans are using but i'm saying you notice it i notice it like just in on tv and like you see you just hear someone say it somewhere. And you can tell that it's, you know, like let's go, folks, is way more specific. And nobody's saying that. Everybody's saying hello, folks. Right? Based on the comments I read, there's a few that said they're,
Starting point is 00:03:41 after you railed on let's go for a few weeks, they just don't like the about face. that's the joke i know that's the comedy ironically some of them said they just don't like let's go so much they just can't even say it ironically i don't either and that's why we're making fun of them is for saying let's go folks we are it, you know, it's like you watch UFC, you ever watch fighting, UFC fighting? If a guy gets in trouble, he doesn't go away, he gets closer. That's what this is. If you go get closer to, like if you watch a guy and he gets rocked
Starting point is 00:04:20 and he's got to get it back together a little bit, it's something you've learned in fighting. If someone's going to fight you, run at yeah like they they say that with a gun if someone's going to shoot a gun with you go to the guy if it's a knife run yeah but so it's it's almost like we're going we don't like let's go so much we're going at we're going we're getting up in it we're locking it up we're getting up up in. All right, I'm sold. We're in control of the let's go, and we take it over, and then we make it our own thing.
Starting point is 00:04:54 We control the narrative. We control the narrative of let's go. And every time someone says let's go, we enjoy it more because we go, folks. That's what i think afterwards when i see someone i see you see it and this weekend watching golf was great this weekend they had eight playoffs holes i believe unbelievable and uh you see i saw a guy in the crowd just scream let's go like he's you know like the lunatics and i'm thought of folks and i didn't i wasn't angry at that guy yeah you know i was like oh i get that for sure all right i thought of my own thing it's not look it's not for sure yet i we're gonna do we're doing another uh we can do another poll but i want we're
Starting point is 00:05:40 we're gonna we're not doing it now yeah okay give it. Give it, let us breathe. We'll keep doing polls until we get the results we want. Yeah. Yeah. We'll do another one. So how long do you guys want this to go on, if you know what I mean? We, but we'll do it again, but I want it to be a little, it needs to, let's let everybody, I want you to think in your soul about this. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:06:06 Get into it. I might switch. Let me think about it a little more. Maybe it's hello, folks. Maybe I just want it to be back. Hello, folks. Yeah. Can we have both?
Starting point is 00:06:15 Huh? Can we do both? We can't. Yeah. You can do whatever you want. But I don't know what the point of. It's the if it's the intro to the podcast, I'm not going to go, hello, folks. Let's go, folks.
Starting point is 00:06:29 You're getting nowhere. That's how someone gets where they go nowhere in life is they go, let's just do both. Let's turn quickly. Yeah, that's what happens. You don't make a decision. You don't make a decision. You don't move forward. You kind don't make a decision, you don't move forward. You kind of sit in the decision of two things.
Starting point is 00:06:50 Is that not true? Yeah, I got way more serious than I was anticipating. You pivoted that into like real life advice. That is, but that's why you can't just sit and do, I mean, I don't know, you asked if we could do two, I two i'm telling you the reason why i know but we just did a poll where overwhelmingly he was like let's just let it sit for a while you did a poll was the episode even up i put that out i think three days later i mean it's people listen to this podcast like like on. We're acting like we're on a live show. It comes out.
Starting point is 00:07:29 People listen to it. People are going to think about it. I'm letting people think. We're making a decision. We'll come back. I'm on board with Let's Go, folks, but I hope the next poll is like 90% hello, folks. Just as an answer.
Starting point is 00:07:43 I hope it's gone the other way. Don't just do that just to make a point. That's true. If that happens, I'm going to make sure. Answer honestly. Yeah, we're going to do another poll if that happens. If I see 90%, you better bet we're doing another poll. Just threatening them with polls.
Starting point is 00:07:57 We'll do so many polls, dude. Guys, I'll do this poll podcast. It'll be about polls. But you've already said you hate and don't trust. I don't trust them i do look this i contradict myself a lot and that's what it is there was uh more than one pastor have already said they accepted the challenge and did it one posted a video if i'm saying it let's go folks i saw that yeah on the nate land if you look at nate land uh
Starting point is 00:08:21 instagram uh he started off with let's go go, folks. He did it good. He raised his energy up, and it felt good. But you know what I mean? That's what I mean. I think the hello, folks was easy. Let's go. He had to do something. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:08:34 He had to get it in there. And his church was clearly a type of church, community church. He needs to come to a very old, conservative church like mine and try that. Oh, let's go, folks. People would walk out. Yeah. What's going on? Yeah. They would be fine with hello folks that's how they talk right yeah yeah we're trying to get younger on this podcast they would literally look get up and go yeah they wouldn't like it uh
Starting point is 00:08:58 yeah we can look we're we're it's i i want a fair all i'm asking for is everybody be fair how does this thing I want everybody to just think about it and then I know I fidget with this a lot people always bring that up I bet you would fidget too
Starting point is 00:09:19 if you were sitting here it's so hard not to it's kind of fun grip the bottom of it oh god it's happening sitting here. It's so hard not to. Yeah. I always want to grip the bottom of it. Oh, God. It's happening. He doesn't even work here.
Starting point is 00:09:38 Yeah, who's this guy? It's getting worse let's go folks alright microphones fixed but I do get fidgety with it also let's read these comments we can talk about some other stuff David Womack I started a new job this past week and i have my own office i'm quite
Starting point is 00:10:10 introverted and struggled i always have trouble spelling quite i just had it this weekend sorry uh i'm quite introverted and struggle to meet new people i was listening to you guys on my lunch break and a guy across the hall heard you and hollered, hello, folks. Anyways, we're now best friends. Thanks for breaking the ice and helping me make a new office buddy. David, the fact that he's going to hear that you wrote that and probably bail on you.
Starting point is 00:10:39 That would be funny. David, I heard Nate talk about i i was just saying hello no that's awesome bringing people together yeah yeah two guys if they listen this they're all they're going to get along i'd like them to vote on the hello let's go debate there right now at work what if they break up being friends because one's so bored of the let's go folks the other one goes hello folks is how i even how we met he just hello folks is everything jen stevens let's go folks it's it's like our secret handshake that's what i'm talking about yeah it's uh it's it only us know this it's so specific that's the thing that kind of makes me go, it's so specific. No one knows.
Starting point is 00:11:27 You know, let's go. It's just, it's ridiculous. Yeah. That's the joke. We're in on the joke. We're so much smarter than all the let's go folks. Chase Whitney. Hello, folks.
Starting point is 00:11:38 Sound much more greatest average American. Let's go, folks. Feels a little like we're trying to ride a bandwagon. Because you're looking at it the wrong way chase uh if you're if i don't you got to get it it's not the i get like we're doing a fairy saying that's very famous right now yeah but it's it's we're we're making a new one up hello folks is not everybody talks like that let's go folks is we're making fun of them up. Hello, folks is not, everybody talks like that. Let's go, folks, is we're making fun of them, and it's new, and no one says let's go, folks. Nobody says that. It's a juxtaposition of let's go, the way younger people talk,
Starting point is 00:12:16 folks, and the way older people talk, which is a big theme in your comedy, Nate, is being in between generations. Yeah. Right? Yep. Look at that. That was a big one. Ty Burham. Hello, friends. That's what we say over at aaron land so hello friends is uh jim nance doesn't he say that uh with golf
Starting point is 00:12:35 i believe someone else says hello friend hello friend i think Jim Nantz is hello, friend. Again, that's along with, like, his famous thing is hello, friend. So, yeah, Aaron Land would seem like a place where y'all would steal someone else's stuff. James Lackey. I have seen every episode. I watch every stand-up special on Netflix from every comedian. The closest I ever came to blacking out from laughing is when brian says kent state massacre after talking about vietnam and nate says good night non-stop the funny thing about that i re-watched the clip i wasn't planning on whispering massacre like get to sleep but i
Starting point is 00:13:20 said kent state just kent state and you go night. And then I'd lost all confidence in myself. I was just like, man. You said it so faintly, dude. I watched that clip probably 20, 30 times. Who needed it to hear, needed to hear. That's a good way to put it. That's how you talk about stuff with your kid in the room. You know?
Starting point is 00:13:43 There you go. Kevin Gorey. Butch Allman. Nate has gone from inventing words to inventing humans. Watch out, folks. I guess it's Butch Trucks. Butch Trucks. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:13:57 He was in the Allman Brothers. All right. Yeah. It's Butch Trucks. That's their uncle, right? Yep. I was wrong. Nick Buback.
Starting point is 00:14:09 Nate with, it's weird that Usain Bolt isn't there. Talking about the U.S. Olympic trials. Usain Bolt, the famous Jamaican sprinter. I guess I meant, yeah, it was the U.S. trial. He should be in it. I'll be honest with you. Why would they not? He should just be around at all the trials.
Starting point is 00:14:36 He almost feels like an American, doesn't he? Yeah. Because he's so popular. Yeah. Let him come. Don't you want to see what he would do? I would like to see what he would do. Yeah. Well, give us
Starting point is 00:14:45 what we want have him in there greg luganis should go do we should send greg luganis over there somebody from my generation yeah that's our guy send him to jamaica we give you same bull rusty green this is i think i know rusty uh 1985 during live aid phil collins played the london That's our guy. Send him to Jamaica. We give you the same bowl. Rusty Green. I think I know Rusty. In 1985, during Live Aid, Phil Collins played the London show. After his set, he flew on the Concord to Philadelphia and played that concert as well, making him the only artist to play both shows on the same day. That's pretty crazy.
Starting point is 00:15:21 Yeah. From London. Yeah. Flew on the Concorde. Which some people pointed out the reason it was discontinued. Some pretty major plane crashes. Oh, man. The Concorde.
Starting point is 00:15:34 50% chance. That's how that was their motto. 50%. But you'll get there. That's the motto. That's their motto. I know it's only 50%, but always remember that's better than 60%. There you go. 50% chance you get in a wreck.
Starting point is 00:15:51 We could be 60%. And they go, that's true. And you go, all right, I'll do it. That's how they would get you into doing it. 50-50 if this plane goes down. Nicholas Wynkoop. If Aaron's dream is to be the reaction guy On the bench warm ups Then he's literally living his dream right now
Starting point is 00:16:08 Yep You said that last week right That would be your When we're talking about basketball The guy holding everybody back On the bench I'm holding all the crew I hold them back
Starting point is 00:16:23 When we laugh Yeah from getting You let them loose a little bit I'd be appreciative Yeah. I'm holding all the crew. I hold them back when we laugh. Yeah, from getting... You let them loose a little bit, and I'd be appreciative. Tyler Gamil, or Gamil. While the Disco Demolition Night promotion was a complete disaster, the worst promotion night ever
Starting point is 00:16:39 has to go to the Cleveland Indians where they put on 10-cent beer night in 1974. Fans are getting so drunk and rowdy that they eventually overran the stand serving beer and started carrying full kegs back into the bleachers. Later in the game, one fan ran on the field and got into an altercation with an outfielder from the visiting Rangers team. When his teammates came to his aid, hundreds of fans stormed the field and a giant brawl erupted on the field.
Starting point is 00:17:10 It got so bad that Cleveland's manager, fearing for the safety of the Rangers players, sent his own players into the action, armed with bats to protect Rangers players from their own fans. That does sound bad. That could be worse. Yeah, I looked this up. There's some photos.
Starting point is 00:17:26 I think it was Mike Hargrove, who was a longtime manager, who was the player, and he got into an altercation with the fans, and Billy Martin was the manager, and they ran out there with bats, and then the fans swarmed the field, and then the Indians ran out there with their own bats to defend the Rangers. Ten-cent beer night. I mean, a dollar gets you annihilated a dollar look at that one picture of the guy on the ground there
Starting point is 00:17:52 they're just that's a face chaos i mean just so and people drink before they get there yeah so that's so pre-game 10 set beer night i think so i mean i'm sure you know what's happening and like they're i mean obviously 1974 i mean where were they 30 cents full price uh but they're they were uh i i like it's like i love the mindset of just going it's 10 set beer night we're doing something great for you guys. And everybody goes, yeah, dude, we appreciate that. We're going to bring our family and stuff and have some beers. And just to then a guy with a keg next to him and just looking out at the outfielder going, is that guy looking at us?
Starting point is 00:18:37 Like he takes it personal. And he's got his beer and he's on his, I mean, he maybe brought $2. And now that's his 20th beer. And I mean, you know, the logic behind going to get the keg to go, dude, I'm not, 10 cents is, for 10 cents, just let me bring a keg out. I'll give you $40 and I should get the whole keg. I think a keg is 173 beers.
Starting point is 00:19:05 So how much is that? So that's $17.30. No. and I should get the whole keg. I think a keg is 173 beers. So how much is that? So it's $17.30? No. Right? No. I think it's $1,700. No.
Starting point is 00:19:15 It's not. I think it's $170. I would bet. I mean, yeah, $17.30. For a keg? Yeah, if you're doing 10 cents a beer. Give me the keg, keep the 20. Yeah, keep the change on the 20. There was one player who was involved.
Starting point is 00:19:33 They're only making $17 on the keg? Yeah, I mean, I don't know if they're making money on beer at all that night. No. They're just trying to get fans to stand. What is 10% of $17? Yeah. making money on beer at all that night no what is temper yeah 10 of 7 yeah that seems so it seems so cheap that it seems wrong yeah yeah i guess we'll find out next week there's one player that yes exactly we're gonna wait a week to find out there was one player who was involved in this game and the disco demolition night. He was in both of them. Oh, I guess you write a book.
Starting point is 00:20:05 Yeah. First half of this second half. So these bars, some bars will do like dollar pitcher night. It's just, you just crazy. Yeah. It's crazy how cheap these places will give it sometimes.
Starting point is 00:20:19 Uh, yeah. Thanks for that comment. Uh, it's your college days, right? Good night. Good night. That college days right good night good night that was worth a good night right there bringing something to the table let's go yeah you know
Starting point is 00:20:31 let's go good night folks i mean try to put a button on that segment you know what i mean yeah next comment i think it was there was a button already and you undid it and now we lost the button that's what you did with that comment. You know, sometimes cups are a little bit cheaper for, and they have to raise it. I went to a place the other day, they charged you for Diet Cokes. I did go to a place, a restaurant. That was a great restaurant, and they charged you for every Diet Coke.
Starting point is 00:21:03 And that makes me furious. Did you not find out till you got the receipt at the end? Yeah. 22 days. Yeah. Yeah. They, uh,
Starting point is 00:21:11 you don't find out. Sometimes they come up and say, Hey, it's insane. McDonald's ain't charging for every diet Coke. Don't you're, if you're going to a nice, it's like a steakhouse and you charge it.
Starting point is 00:21:23 Look, if it comes in the bot, the bottles, you are obvious. That's different. Yeah. But if it's, to a nice, it's like a steakhouse and you charge. Look, if it comes in the bottles, you are obvious that's different. But if you're bringing too many to drink, you can't. You can't. When we were first married,
Starting point is 00:21:35 Big J's birthday party, we go to this restaurant called, I want to say it was called Ninja in New York. And this is we have no money uh you know this is whatever 15 years ago or something and so we go eat laura's the only one working and uh we go to this restaurant it's like the first time really going to like a super super nice new york expensive restaurant where where your bill is going to you know we got a large table of people where i mean
Starting point is 00:22:02 i think it might be like a couple hundred bucks a person you know like it might be a thousand dollars for like a group of 10 people you know so that we're like dude we've never done i don't we don't know what this is uh we went to sparks once to get off the the first time we ever went to spend a lot of money on food we went this is how southern and basically redneck we are we go to sparks which is the famous new york uh steak restaurant where the mafia guy got shot paul castellano yeah he got he they killed him right in front of the restaurant uh you ever hear that no yeah it was a big uh they named god he did john goddy john god he became the new boss he yeah kill the guy it's like the 80s right
Starting point is 00:22:42 i mean it was you know uh and they got him right outside and so we went there and ate and uh that dying and they they you know we uh we went in there and ate and it's like a big famous it's a great steakhouse and so i remember the check being like 200 or something we took a picture of it because we just never i mean we we couldn't believe ever go like what do you mean yeah this is insane this is insane two hundred dollars for food like that's crazy and we remember we took a picture of it just like we're just a bunch of dumb rednecks uh but they uh so the ninja thing so they come over and they bring all we were drinking diet coke this was forever ago and i mean it's it's
Starting point is 00:23:22 like 30 worth of diet coke and we're like laura was livid i was too like it's just crazy to be like tell us like come up and say yo man we're charging you for diet coke you went to a really nice restaurant and ordered diet coke yeah i'll drink diet coke everywhere but i thought those were your drinking days so you would have probably gotten a glass of wine or he had just done 10-10 beer a night. I think we were already on edge with how much this was going to cost. This was before Sparks, and so we were worried, too. Like, let's try not to go crazy.
Starting point is 00:23:55 Let's get a bottomless Diet Coke. Yeah, we were not trying to spend too much. And it's one, like New York is very big. It's Jay's birthday. Now we're all going to pay for it and we all everybody it was like everybody's pitching in and that's also new york too they do that with uh i remember a girl i worked in chicago uh kristin and she uh had she was from new york she had to go to a uh wedding and she was the bridesmaid i remember she had to buy him a gift and she was like saving him she was like working taking extra shifts because she's like i gotta give him a gift it's gonna be
Starting point is 00:24:28 like 500 bucks and i was like what you got to give someone a gift worth 500 dollars like for a wedding like that you're not your it's not your daughter getting married you know it's uh you're just a guest of the wedding and they were like that's what they that's what they do in new york which i kind of like it new york is like it's very much it's very sweet it's very nice you're really giving them a gift but that's kind of the expected number i mean i think they spend a lot it's not like in south you're it's it's you don't give giant gifts i mean i think you give i think a hundred dollars would even be a lot for a lot of like you wouldn't even give that but it's you know i mean where you are
Starting point is 00:25:12 and stuff like yeah obviously the grandparents they probably do a little more and stuff like that but a friend friend i don't think you would ever expect someone to get i remember i was like golly that's kind of crazy yeah you gotta you know they gotta buy the dress they got so it costs this person 1500 to go to your wedding just one person i got him a plunger for his wedding you did man that really made me laugh you got me a plunger yeah for the really nice plunger i don't know i don't know what it special about it but it looks really nice it was on your registry okay yeah and then the description i opened it up like who got us the plunger it was for brian and said i want you to think of me every time you use this
Starting point is 00:25:53 that was really funny yeah yeah opposite the opposite of 500 i mean I mean, yeah. I mean, it's a really nice plunger though. It's a, you just spent more money at 10 cent beer. That's very true. I, I, for many years, the single guy would get 20,
Starting point is 00:26:14 $25 gift as a wedding. And then, yeah, but I think that's what you, but I didn't progress over time. Yeah. I mean, I was doing that up till two years ago.
Starting point is 00:26:23 And then my wife's like, we got to up it a little bit. You got to give them a little bit more than that somebody sent us and it wasn't it wasn't labeled and it was this kit where of of uh to like where my wife and i are supposed to like body paint all over it oh god it's the weirdest thing we've i would i was so from nate well dude it was i mean i read this how it had this guide of what to do like you cover yourself in paint and then the two of you together paint on this canvas and we were this is the weirdest thing ever and we found out it was a comic that sent it to us as a joke yeah but but reading through it we like, this is who would send us. Was it hard to do, though? That's how you button something up.
Starting point is 00:27:14 Becky Hurley. The reason it seems unbelievable that Ronaldo was able to tank Coke's stock by $4 billion is because, well, it is unbelievable. This is a situation where people took correlation to equal causation and ran with it all right i like becky's i i like becky's response i like someone that comes in and goes probably not true i looked it up and uh stock market was just way down that day across the board so when he had his press conference that morning it was already coke was already down four billion dollars when he did that so and by the end of the day i think coke was actually up from the previous day it just happened to be at the same time but it already that's crazy
Starting point is 00:27:56 how big coke is that just like four billion dollars is just now it's just a bad day that day someone i was just talking about that but some of their stocks with oil and stuff they're like their company will be worth 2 billion to 30 billion and it's all like in a week it's all make-believe though yeah that's what i'm starting to think i don't you know where's all this money i don't i have the older i'm getting the more i'm like so confused with going i think there's something you're like how does everybody everybody have money now? It seems like everybody has money. Like everybody, you can't, all the kids can't be doing, building a pool, construction. No one, there's no lumber.
Starting point is 00:28:31 There's no anything. Everybody's got money. Like we went through a pandemic and everybody's just richer now because of it. A lot of people are, yeah. Yeah, I'm not saying everybody, but it just seems crazy to me. Like everybody's like just doing better.
Starting point is 00:28:46 It's all, it better. Where is it? And all the money's like, there's no concrete money. It's all just kind of like, they have $4 billion worth, $9 billion worth. What is that even? It's all just moving around. I don't believe any of it. What is the stock market? What is the stock market?
Starting point is 00:29:07 Curare fan. Curare fan. C-U-R-A-R-E fan. Wrong description of rope-a-dope. More commonly, Ali would be against the ropes, away from the corner, and cover his head while his opponent would be punching him out until he got tired. Then Ali would make his comeback after conserving his energy.
Starting point is 00:29:26 Still pretty wild strategy, though. I looked up that video last week. That wasn't even the right video. Yeah. That video is pretty amazing, though. If you kept watching, he, like, boops the guy on the head and just totally messes with him. But that wasn't George Foreman.
Starting point is 00:29:42 Yeah, that was. Or a rope-a-dope. So it was just nothing that was like a no that was like a known nobody boxer or something like you know a guy that's great obviously but not he ain't doing that george foreman uh b andrew scott if the band says their name is just eagles and you don't have to add the to the front of a sentence you wouldn't say the Metallica is a legendary band or the Duran Duran were great in the 80s.
Starting point is 00:30:08 So you could say Nate performed for a member of Eagles. All right. All right, that makes sense. But at the same time, you wouldn't say, what time does Titans play today? They're going up against Jaguars. Yeah. Does it have something to do with being plural?
Starting point is 00:30:27 I wouldn't be friends with that person. If someone said, hey, what time did Titans play today? I'd be like, you got to leave this house right now. And he goes, why? He goes, we're about to get started. Let's go. Dude, get out of here right now. Are you kidding me?
Starting point is 00:30:45 Can I have a Coke? Or no, can I have Coke? He came and said the. He never says the. He never says the. You know, Coke stock went down. I don't know if that. I'm trying to think of the.
Starting point is 00:30:57 Maybe I don't say the that much either. Honestly, I might be talking to myself, and I'm going to have to ask myself to leave. Aaron, does that have something to do with it being plural or i feel like yeah i feel like that does play it play a role in it i don't know there you go uh i learned the hard way not to try to not to try to add a little thought there at the end. I'd love you to add a thought, just if it could be good. That's a lot to ask. It's going to be a while. It's going to be a while. We're working up to that.
Starting point is 00:31:32 Yeah. We're having a new poll. Let's go, pals. And I'm like, now let me tell you something. I know y'all are gonna sit here and i'm trying to separate even us the folks of this like i'm gonna get my own group i'm getting down to just me and the guy that runs aaron land and we take off and do our own thing matt conrad ken griffey senior was supposed to be on the marshall plane that crashed however he got his girlfriend pregnant the year before with Ken Griffey Jr.
Starting point is 00:32:07 and decided he needed money, so he signed a minor league contract instead of staying on the Marshall football team. Wow. That's crazy. That is crazy. Did we talk about who? Did we say Wahlberg was on that 9-11? Someone texted me that.
Starting point is 00:32:23 Did we talk about this? I don't know. I don't either. Talking about plane crashes. Maybe that's because they're talking about plane crashes going down. King Griffey Sr. is supposed to be on it. That's the 9-11. Mark Wahlberg was supposed to be on that flight. So was Seth MacFarlane, I think.
Starting point is 00:32:37 I didn't know that. He was supposed to be on the flights. Yeah. I don't think King Griffey Sr. actually signed with Marshall, but I think he was about to, and then he got a minor league contract and he needed the money. But he would have been on the team the year that happened. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:32:51 Yeah. That's pretty crazy. Pretty crazy. Yeah. Yeah. So the lesson there is don't go to college. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:32:59 When did we talk? What did we talk about with that? The seventies, the plane crashes, Marshall and Wichita state. We talked about my brother too. And he's, yeah yeah that's right uh i don't remember anything uh all right everybody uh we also wanted to give a shout out to uh uh frank turner he sent us a book uh uh plat a plato and a platypus walk into a bar understanding philosophy through jokes you know this book that's a great
Starting point is 00:33:27 book i've had that book for a while yeah they kind of go through all the different types of philosophy and explain it with uh one-liner jokes and yeah it's really cool that's fun yeah yeah do some reading uh to go let me see so what do some reading some reading yeah you shove it to the end just go oh that's wonderful get rid of it got that pin uh no i no i will be reading i don't need the pin uh you had to get it i had already i'd already gone all the way over there. You already made the move. No, no, I will read it. I'll read it. I like the idea of that. It's fun.
Starting point is 00:34:10 Yeah, learning through that. So we have one thing. Vanderbilt's playing. We're watching this Wednesday, so hopefully it's over. Maybe they're not playing. They just swept. We will be finding out. I'll be watching it tonight, this being Monday.
Starting point is 00:34:21 we will be finding out. I'll be watching it tonight. We're, you know, this being Monday. And, you know, Vanderbilt got into the, people that don't know, College World Series. Vanderbilt got into it. They were supposed to play NC State in an elimination game. NC State had players that get COVID,
Starting point is 00:34:41 and so they had to cancel. And they did no contest, so they're not letting them play. Which is terrible. No one wants that, dude. Vanderbilt doesn't want that. No one's on board with that. It's insane. They shouldn't even be testing these kids. It's unreal. I mean, just... You're letting all these fans go in and watch games. It doesn't matter.
Starting point is 00:35:01 It's like, let the kids play. No one's... But there was a lot of like crazy stuff people start attacking vanderbilt like like we had something to do with it you're like they run nothing to do with it yeah i was just watching like a guy on their news he's a guy in north carolina like their news uh was like i don't know why don't they go test vanderbilt then and all this stuff and i'm sure they did they did yeah and then uh you just like someone that you go like all right dude don't bring like you think it's us you think it's vanderbilt doing that i would be upset but it's not like i'm gonna be like well vanderbilt should be kicked out too like that
Starting point is 00:35:32 doesn't make sense that's their logic how about you go get mad at the ncaa we will support you we will be on board with that but don't start attacking vanderilt Because now You're starting to make me happy Well as a Vandy fan It made me mad that I see some non-Vandy fans post Congratulations Vandy On your next national championship They're saying that like Because
Starting point is 00:35:56 Because we got a rest pitcher for An extra day It's a no win situation If Vanderbilt wins Well of course they got a big advantage. And if we lose, then they're going to be, they're going to be like,
Starting point is 00:36:09 can you believe that? Yeah. Well, go win. And then let it be known. We did get that extra day of rest. What do you want us to do? And then we prepared. It's not like Vanderbilt's garbage.
Starting point is 00:36:18 It's not like we're lucky to be there. We're dominant. We haven't played great, but what we did in the Stanford game was unbelievable. And so't played great, but what we did in the Stanford game was unbelievable. And so we're awesome, dude. One funny thing was I saw an interview, and I don't know when it was with that coach, NC State coach.
Starting point is 00:36:34 And I like that coach. But when he said something, he goes, I don't know what's going on. There's a bug running through our team. And you're like, I don't know, maybe don't say that. Like, I don't know what that was. That's all I thought. I was like, just don't mention that. I don't know, maybe don't say that. Like, I don't know what that was. That's all I thought. I was like, just don't mention that. I don't know, dude.
Starting point is 00:36:49 Everybody ate food last night. No one could taste it. I don't know. We're having a weird tournament. Anyway, next question. And then you get tested. They're like, well, we got to test you now. And you're like, well, don't say there's some kind of cold running through your team
Starting point is 00:37:03 during a global pandemic. Just kind of keep your mouth shut and say they're injured maybe they can't say it yeah i don't know but that was very funny i think uh yeah dude cut it don't mention say they all torn their acls that would be better than you know than saying we got a cold. Doesn't know about COVID. Yeah. Guess I'm going to bug. You got some bug running through us, you know?
Starting point is 00:37:30 Anyway, so, and you guys had a good weekend, right? Yeah. We did. You did Chicago Zanies. Chicago Zanies. Four sold out shows. Yeah. Actually sold out weekend.
Starting point is 00:37:42 Yeah, yeah. A lot of folks came out yeah that's really cool and we're talking earlier you know when you're like meeting people after the show and you're just shaking people's hands and and uh podcast fans would go uh hello folk they just try to so they you're talking about it being a secret handshake like that's what it was yes they just kind of throw it in there so i knew uh yeah so that was really cool thank you to everybody that came out yeah that's awesome see i think the let's go folks too gives them more energy let's go folks like it starts off you have to bring the energy up a little bit yeah and so when you're when you're
Starting point is 00:38:18 meeting and it's it's it's uh you would you would feel more comfortable being like let's go folks and it's a joke i did get get some let's goes, too. Oh, okay. Yeah. It's out there. Could have used them on the pole. Let's go? Maybe should have went to Aaron's show
Starting point is 00:38:32 and been sitting at home voting on this pole. Because I could have used you. Yeah, it was fun, man. It was really cool. Yeah. I did an outdoor event Saturday,
Starting point is 00:38:44 charity event. Anthonyony and leah and cooper are big fans of the podcast listen and um it was fun but it was obviously outdoors it's so hot people were there's bouncy houses people are spread out but to his credit anthony without even asking he just gets comedy he got everybody to come move to the front oh great so it would all be up up for even move the chairs up. So they've been a little bit more in the shade. And then when I was done, you know how we all have examples of crazy things we have to follow.
Starting point is 00:39:14 Yeah. When I got off stage immediately after there was some guy there whose wife is struggling with cancer and they've really down on their bills. They gave him a new car. It was parked right behind the stage there. He starts crying. Then that guy gets up, tells this incredible story. Everyone's totally forgot about me at this point.
Starting point is 00:39:32 How he died once, but God brought him back from the dead. He had a reason, a purpose for it. Everybody's crying. And I just told Anthony, thank you so much for not putting that in front of me. Yeah. Instead of, please thank you for doing it afterwards because we've all had to follow. You had to follow something similar to that, right?
Starting point is 00:39:48 It was like a soldier. They gave a soldier who lost his legs in Iraq. They gave him a car. He walked out. His name was Nate. They brought him up. They go,
Starting point is 00:40:04 these two, these guys, they were giving the car away. It's Michael Finney's. I got my billboard behind me. And it was a great event. He would do a golf tournament. And it was, I had a bunch of magicians on it and comics. My dad would do it.
Starting point is 00:40:21 I got to hang out a lot of old comics comics like a lot of guys that did carson and were on carson a lot and it was it was always so fun to talk to them about 70s and 80s comedy and then in the boom and you know uh so i always loved it and and they were always so funny dude these dudes would just murder like there's just such a difference that old comic mindset i performed in the round it was first time i ever did that in phoenix which i've done now since then but it was one of the first i ever got to do and uh when you do the round one of the one of the best was uh i'll have to get some of these guys names i i'm blanking on i remember i think tom dreeson was there tom dreeson has been there uh i met he talked to my comedy class comedy college and uh when i first started comedy tom dreeson came and spoke yeah uh which was pretty cool i mean he was like very when i mean when i
Starting point is 00:41:16 first started in 2003 and then i would say it's funny to start and then go see him again later yeah like uh not that he remembers me but i'm like you talked in our class yeah uh and then you're doing comedy and you're like in it uh but uh they i i'll get everybody's names and i'm gonna try to because you could look these guys up they're all very very funny and uh they so that we do when you perform in the round you can get confused on where you're at and so you don't you're kind of like because you can get confused on where you're at. And so you're kind of like, because you kind of make a circle. I love performing in the round.
Starting point is 00:41:52 Especially for me, I don't move a lot. And it makes me kind of make a circle the whole show. And so it makes me move a little more, which I think is a good thing. And so this guy gets done. And there's exits kind of everywhere, but there's only one exit off the stage. And he just walks down the wrong way. And so, like, it's a circle. And it's very easy to get disoriented because you don't really know where you're at.
Starting point is 00:42:16 And when you spin, so he goes, all right, everybody. And he walks down this ramp. And everybody's like, you know, everybody goes, give it up. And they keep going. And, like, I mean, like three minutes minutes and then he just comes back on the stage and he's like the door was locked down there and he had to go out and they had they go no you go out that way and he walked out the right way uh but one of them they gave a this vet game he lost both his legs he had prosthetic legs and these dudes that would give the car away they go we're going to go up and talk and it's never good when someone doesn't really know how to talk and it was three
Starting point is 00:42:50 of them it's either they're going to do two minutes or 40 minutes yeah and you don't know which like they're either going to be too nervous and just fly through it or they're going to start liking it and get a couple laughs yeah and then they're going to keep and you can't get them all it's not going to be great it's not going gonna be great either way it's not good yeah and uh so they went the 40 route and did a lot a lot of time and then they bring out the guy and now that they've the show's gone long they have to bring me up pretty quickly so they bring the guy out it's very awesome give it up nate they give him his keys to the car he's crying the whole audience is crying they're guard everybody please welcome welcome Nate Bargetts.
Starting point is 00:43:25 And they bring up immediately me. And I'm like, oh, my wife is mean. Like, just whatever. I mean, I have nothing. And I just basically get through the set for six minutes. You know, never, maybe get a laugh on the last joke. But it's like, no. And then the show kind of went back to normal.
Starting point is 00:43:40 Yeah. Yeah. Fun. That is tough. Also, a big thing that happened this week uh uh which we have video of planet fitness is no more it's gone it's gone you've moved on moved on with my life man i felt like it was time and i think somebody pointed out that you both correctly predicted that this is when it would happen it would be a couple weeks after
Starting point is 00:44:03 i got married yeah well yeah when lucy starts looking at all the the nonsense bills you you're bringing her a an education she has to pay off that's going going nowhere friendship class in notre dame she's like oh great i get i just get loaded with i don't know the most expensive debt on earth i mean you know he he brought MTSU, and he went to college 45 years ago. So he's been... Still paying it off. He's still paying it off.
Starting point is 00:44:34 He pays it off for a dollar a day. It's a thing like it's the cost of a cup of coffee. You could sponsor me. Yeah. Has your college been paid off? Yeah. Yeah. And then college been paid off? Yeah. Yeah. And then mine didn't exist.
Starting point is 00:44:48 My parents paid mine off. It was $1,500. I had a joke where I said it was $40 cash. Truthfully, it was $1,500. Yeah, not much less than the actual amount. $1,500 is all they, because my parents once, I mean, my parents like helped, at one point, everybody kind of with their college debt and i mean mine was they didn't even it was like a it was they told our family kind of together
Starting point is 00:45:12 like they said uh you know like my brother and sister kind of was like almost like a christmas present and on mine i was like what was mine they're like i don't i think we did yours like fine we didn't bring it up like it was like not even worth mitch bond. They're like, I don't, I think we did. You're like, fine. We didn't even bring it up. Like it was like not even worth Mitch. It was not even worth it. It was, it was, it was just not enough to even really matter. Like it's and I pain some bills. Yeah. They lump in, you know?
Starting point is 00:45:39 So, uh, your planet fitness, uh, which we have the video. I'm sure some of you watched it. It was on air. We reposted it, right, on Nate Land. And then, so if you haven't, we're going to play it for you. It's a quick video. I'm joking. That's always the word someone says like that.
Starting point is 00:45:57 Guys, don't worry about it. I know you are. It's a pretty quick video. It's going to go through quick. I wouldn't play it if it was that long. No. You ever have somebody showing you a video like on their phone and you tap it to see how long yeah how long is left yeah that's and then you see it you're like come on yeah yeah no this was a very
Starting point is 00:46:16 very funny video how are you feeling i feel good i feel like it's the end of a long chapter in my life, but I think the start of something greater. Hey Allison, my name is Aaron. I am a member of this particular plant fitness. I was hoping to cancel my membership over the tunnel. Okay, so unfortunately I don't think we'll be able to do it over the tunnel, but we do have other options available for you and I can go through those with you. I've given them $10 a month for four years and I've never stepped foot inside the gym. I'm not just doing this for me, I'm doing this for the thousands of people, men and women all across this country country who have never gone in to play the fitness. That's who I'm doing this for. Woo! I'm not going to miss not going it's a big part of your life for a long time
Starting point is 00:47:35 it's supposed to be the last four years it's been a big part of my life is not going into this gym I think I'm nervous but I'm also excited. I'm excited about what's to come. I'm excited about what else I'm not going to do.
Starting point is 00:47:54 There it is. The official membership cancellation form. Was it? And you said. Pretty special. Literally 90 seconds. It was that easy. Oh, dude, it was the easiest thing in the world.
Starting point is 00:48:04 They don't care at all. Dude, the guy was like my age. walk in he goes hey i like your shirt very sarcastically and i go oh yeah i'm here to cancel my membership yeah i don't like your shirt that much anymore is that what he said yeah like a funny just he goes all right just give me your phone number and i'll cancel it i think you could tell you were coming in to cancel with that shirt he you walk in with that shirt i'm were coming in to cancel with that shirt. You walk in with that shirt. I'm not coming in to work at all. And jeans and boots on.
Starting point is 00:48:28 This is a man that's here to cancel. You don't have to say it. It's either cancel or sign up. Right. My intentions were pretty clear walking in there. I feel like they knew. How much money did we figure out that you gave them? So it's $10 a month month and then there's an annual fee
Starting point is 00:48:45 of of i think seventy dollars or something like that so so it was enough that i should have canceled it let's do the exact number four years we're on a podcast we'd like to hear the exact number that'd be 480 480 dollars in in just the monthly fee, plus I think a $60 or $70 annual fee. So that'd be another $280. There's a computer with a calculator. Yeah, well, we can do the math. $480 plus. I just want an exact number so we can have something fun to talk about on a podcast that's
Starting point is 00:49:20 going out to a lot of people. 70 times 4? There you go. That's $280. How long would y'all's podcast last seven would it just be a lot of like man that'd be a pretty crazy day huh and you don't talk about the day and the whole podcast is just y'all going just me and brian yeah i guess and it's just you know it goes i went to mcdonald's the other day how much do you spend mcdonald's quite a bit all right so let's uh move on and uh or was it funner to go thirty thousand dollars that's
Starting point is 00:49:48 pretty fun almost a thousand dollars i think over four years that's it i think the annual fee is a little bit higher than that i don't know for sure so you've seven hundred sixty dollars man at least yeah at the very least yeah thousand probably the worst uh over four years that's that's not that much but man that's so many people that are doing that i i put that on tiktok the amount of com i mean hundreds of comments of i've been paying for planet fitness for years never gone in you've inspired me to come in to go cancel this week and then i got a lot of comments that were like i run a planet fitness thank you for this because that allows us to be so cheap you basically subsidize to planet fitness for four years yeah and that's their business model and it's very very
Starting point is 00:50:37 effective it's a i'm for their business model oh i i i don't begrudge them at all. It's like it worked. It works. If we don't do it this way, the people that do will use this and can afford $10 a month is like, there's a lot of people that do actually get better and healthier because of that. Right. And then there's a lot of yous
Starting point is 00:50:59 that are going to die off in groups because you're canceling. You're wearing a McDonald's hat the day after you canceled Planet Fitness. You can at least fly your true colors now. I don't have to pretend anymore. You don't have to pretend anymore. I'd probably be my true self, man. Did they respond to you, like Planet Fitness themselves?
Starting point is 00:51:24 Planet Fitness liked it. Fitness liked the vid. They commented on it. They said, distance makes the heart grow fonder. That's such a good answer, too. It's funny. They're great. They have a sense of humor. All right, I'm going to sign up for Planet Fitness.
Starting point is 00:51:36 I had a Planet Fitness. I think I canceled. My mom would have gotten. Your mom went in there and did it for you? Maybe. You think you can you've probably had it for 12 years
Starting point is 00:51:46 you've been making fun of him yeah we go and I yours is the thousands and I'm the I'm the white whale that they
Starting point is 00:51:53 that they're like Newman yeah Newman that they scofflaw have been chasing scofflaw
Starting point is 00:51:58 they've been chasing forever yeah that I do I do like their business model being like no look we don't care you can cancel.
Starting point is 00:52:06 But if you're too lazy to go work out, you're too lazy to cancel. But you're not too lazy to go sign up because that day is a good motivating day. And it's also cheap enough that it's not. It's forgettable. You'll forget a year easy. You just won't even notice it in your credit card statement for a while. And then you're like, I haven't been 10, no, I forgot about that. I remember they would go in and someone would say they'd have pizza parties.
Starting point is 00:52:33 I think Louis told me that. It's very funny. He's done by going to work out there. And he's like, hey, go in there like, hey, today, now we're going to have a pizza party. And you're like, yeah, that's not. They have cookies on the way out, I think. It's pretty crazy. Yeah, that's good, though.
Starting point is 00:52:50 I think I. You got to think you're just trying to get people to do something. Like it's, it's, it's the people that work out real serious. They're the ones that are like, you're like, yeah, dude, you do your own thing. That's where you go to your own place. Right. This is not that. It's a judgment free zone.
Starting point is 00:53:04 Judgment free zone zone no grunting right we'll turn the lunk arm on oh yeah yeah that's what it is do they have you ever seen it hey look honestly dude i kind of walked in there as i'm standing waiting yeah it kind of looked like a little bit of fun yeah looking around a lot of people you thought like oh i should have should have got a membership would you go back and get a membership maybe you and lucy get one no i'm never going back yeah i can't i've moved on i i would love i want you to go back now i come out with like the black card i upgraded my bad i gotta talk me into it yeah uh so that brings us to uh what we want to talk about this week, the human body.
Starting point is 00:53:47 Is there a topic? I don't know. I think it's going to be interesting, right? Yeah, I think so. I think so. You guys, well, there are 78 organs in the human body. Let's name all of them. Is that everybody? Unless you've had an appendix taken out.
Starting point is 00:54:05 You think there's like 70, but is there one guy that's like 79? Is there one human that is 79? With an extra organ? Could be. There's got to be one. A mutant. Yeah. There are five vital organs.
Starting point is 00:54:18 Yeah, I was going to say, back up. A mutant. A mutant? I thought you said muted. He's still saying it. I struggled. I struggled with the word. Mutant.
Starting point is 00:54:28 How did you say it? I don't know how to say it. A mutant. Mutant. Mutant. Mutant? Mutant. A mutant.
Starting point is 00:54:38 A mutant. A mutant. You would be, if they had Wolverines, if the x-men was real yeah and you just have to you would be who they show on the news we didn't want these mutants in here and then they go and that's how they would and that's how they'd fight back i mean that's probably you would you might get a role in the movie to be honest i mean I mean, if you're, if you make, whoever makes X-Men is listening to this, and you want a good Southern, you know, person that's not acting, it's, we don't want those mutants over here.
Starting point is 00:55:20 They ain't going to come to my planet fitness and work out. Just the lunk alarm is going off the whole time, and it's Brian over in the corner. Well, get on out of here, mutants. I could say it right on one or two. Everybody has their words. Yep. Bartholomew Lou. Bartholomew
Starting point is 00:55:45 Bartholomew Wow There are five vital organs Essential for survival Can you guys guess them? The brain Your turn, Nate Heart
Starting point is 00:55:57 Yeah The lungs Yep, you need at least one of them Kidney Right, at least one of them. Kidney? Right, at least one. There's one left. It's a liver. Boom, you guys nailed it.
Starting point is 00:56:11 Pretty easy. There's only ones I could name. Ask us to keep going. It says, you can still live a fairly normal life without one of your lungs, a kidney, your spleen, appendix, gallbladder, tonsils. It goes on some of the things. And if you're yourself, artificial replacements and medication. You can remove your stomach, colon, pancreas, salivary gland, thyroid, bladder, your other kidney.
Starting point is 00:56:40 And if you want to keep going, you can remove your eyes, nose, ears, larynx, tongue, lower spine, and rectum. Kind of get an overall, you know, trying to cut some weight. You've been carrying around a little too much. And so I started getting rid of stuff. I had a garage sale. Reminded me of Kramer when he went to, went to Lane with him to sign his thing to not stay alive. She's like, yank it like you're starting them over.
Starting point is 00:57:07 Like you're starting them over. Because this says, supported by machines and intensive care unit, they could also take away your skull, heart, and your remaining lung
Starting point is 00:57:15 at least for a short while. Yeah. Man. You could still go to the coffee shop. Just keep it. Question number three three You could eat But machines do everything else She's like I would stick
Starting point is 00:57:32 He's like that's right Because I'd still go to the coffee shop Most of this stuff Spleen, pancreas, gallbladder I had to look up what they even do Yeah what does a spleen do It acts as a filter for your blood it recognizes old or damaged red blood cells and removes them from your body by breaking them down and saving any useful components probably like a little more
Starting point is 00:57:57 respect than we're giving it and i feel like we don't give it any respect i know we're not even right now i think it would be like it's the name so i'm kind of keeping things clean and good yeah got a pretty big role like i would say the heart knows my name like you know like it's that's how you tell the heart yeah dude i can walk up to the heart and talk to it i don't have to it's not like the heart's like who's this guy who's what organ is the heart like who is oh i know who is who is that guy that's the conor mcgregor who is that guy it would probably be the lungs because i learned that one lung is smaller than the other because the heart yeah oh because it because the space in your body heart's right next to it so wait that doesn't make sense.
Starting point is 00:58:45 In which part your heart would know about the lungs? Well, I was just thinking about as far as respect. The lung has to bow down to the heart. Yeah. I mean, it's like the spleen. Doesn't even know he exists. Doesn't even know. What is it?
Starting point is 00:59:01 Your toxils. The heart's like, what? Yeah. What are you even? who let you in here and you're like you're barely in yeah that's what you would say you're barely in the body you're outside the body you're so close to the exit dude when i need to know what the weather is i'll hit you they're like other than that beat it like you're you know i'd rather talk to the tongue you know disgusting that is that's i think the heart that's a big talker the tongue's a big talker yeah when i need to know the wind direction tonsils i'll give you a heads up but i don't think you you guys you got some
Starting point is 00:59:39 nerve coming down here and thinking you can mix it up with us down here. And then the spleen is, you know, respected. The large intestines is about five feet long. Small intestines, 22 feet. Wow. That's pretty long.
Starting point is 00:59:59 Yeah, very long. I think I knew that. I didn't know the number, but I knew it was really long. And you knew the small intestines was a much longer one? I think I did know that. Yeah, I don't know if I cared. It's going to be a long next hour there. I'm giving you the good stuff off the top.
Starting point is 01:00:19 There's some parts of our bodies that... It's only going to go downhill from here. I can't wait. Let's get to the interesting stuff. We're way past that. Yeah, I'm done. Some parts of the bodies that we don't need, scientists say because of evolution. The appendix.
Starting point is 01:00:39 That's one of them. It used to be when we were only eating plants that the appendix served a function, but now it says it serves no real function. But we still have it. We still have it. Yep. It can kill you if it eruptures. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:00:55 Yeah. Might as well get rid of it. Might as well get rid of it. Do you think there would be a day where they get rid of it, like the tonsils? Like they just want to go. There's no reason for it? I mean, I think that's one reason they get rid of it like the tonsils like they just want to go there's no reason for it i mean i think that's one reason they get rid of it pretty quick it's such a weird arrogant thing for doctors to be like you don't even need it anymore you're like well it's in there buddy you only leave it alone guy that just showed up in the room that's what i want to say to these
Starting point is 01:01:18 you know we don't need that you should get rid of it should i should i just run in the store real fast and go get rid of my pinnacles how many i throw that in my head let it live yeah better have it not need it then yeah yeah then turns out we need it at some point uh wisdom teeth serve no purpose i have three did you get them taken out no i uh no still there i got i got my tonsils and I have my wisdom teeth. So you got all the organs. I brought everything with me. That's right. I'm a loyal guy.
Starting point is 01:01:51 If you show up, I bring you. You want to see the end of this movie? I let everybody come. Yeah. Yeah. And on the night, y'all just start bailing on your, you start getting rid of people left and right. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:02:02 I bring them all. Yeah. It's funny that you still have your wisdom teeth because the reason it says that we get rid of people left and right. Yeah. I bring them all. Yeah. It's funny. You still have your wisdom teeth because the reason it says that we get rid of them is the human brain grows larger. It reduces space in the mouth, crowding out the third set of molars. But over time, brains have gotten bigger, so there's no room for them, generally speaking. So my brain can't grow as far? It may not be as big.
Starting point is 01:02:27 That's why they get to stay. How big can they possibly... I mean, where is this... Come on. Well, this is prehistoric man they're talking about. Although, why don't we address that when you're reading this stuff?
Starting point is 01:02:37 But I mean, there's some cases apparently that... This is like the most story in 1997. It still works today. I haven't got mine taken out. I have three. I figured that. I have three. I still works today. I haven't got mine taken out. I have three. I figured that. I don't know. That's a very funny
Starting point is 01:02:50 put down to say to someone. I don't know if I was into that. That makes sense. Goosebumps. Great books. It says our ancestors' hair would stand up to make us appear more threatening to predators. Goose goosebumps said this
Starting point is 01:03:05 it seems like they would say it that's how you read that as you go goosebumps like the way he talked to a spokesperson of goosebumps he showed up in the room yeah he came in he's like hi everybody that's how goosebumps only talk is just what's up everybody welcome to the and you're like hey hey yeah come and he goes i keep it if i relax i'm gonna go away Goosebumps only talk is just, what's up, everybody? Welcome to the, and you're like, all right. Hey, hey. Yeah. Come. And he goes, but if I relax, I'm going to go away. And they go, okay.
Starting point is 01:03:29 All right. I'm really excited right now. What did you say about them? Yeah, I forgot. I was about to ask for the fact again. Goosebumps make your hair stand up on your body, which makes this seem larger to predators. Kind of like when a cat's hair raises up on its back.
Starting point is 01:03:47 It's to scare away predators. Oh. Oh, it's like peacocking? Yeah. Yeah. Okay. I don't know if goosebumps does that too much. I mean, yeah.
Starting point is 01:03:58 I mean, I guess this is prehistoric, man. Yeah, this is our ancestors. Are we getting to now, man? I'm just trying to... All right. Yeah, I is our ancestors. Are we getting to now, man? I'm just trying to... All right. Yeah, I'm just talking about some parts of our body that we don't need anymore.
Starting point is 01:04:10 Yeah. We don't need goosebumps anymore. Well, they don't serve a purpose to scare people off. Well, maybe they do. But generally speaking, that's not what they're used for now. Male nipples.
Starting point is 01:04:21 Most men don't need their nipples anymore. I got dumb fat ones I'd like to get rid of uh every fetus starts out as a female yeah and eventually testosterone causes it to either become male or female that's all going to change pretty soon i think that's what you're supposed to say i'm gonna get rid of that have a special show and make an announcement get the boot get their pink uh the tailbone um we our ancient ancestors used to have tails uh but we you have a tail in the womb right as a fetus you have a tail i'm pretty sure some people
Starting point is 01:05:06 are born with them yeah i mean it's pretty rare but people can have tails yeah just uh it's got a hole in your jeans your whole life yeah just that alone just the tailor cost of it's like you're playing a fitness yeah that yeah if you have a tail who had a tail and what movie did they uh george or jason alexander is a tail oh yeah um it's the one where jack black yeah bates gwyneth paltrow yeah i can't think of that i regret looking at that sorry uh my bad guys don't look up vestigial tails yeah did you just know that word no it's on i google human tail oh and then that's what it's called well look at the people also ask can a human have a tail yeah humans do have a tail but it's only for a brief period during our embryonic development there you go it's most pronounced at around day 31 to 35 of gestation,
Starting point is 01:06:07 and it regresses into the four or five used vertebrae, becoming our coccyx. In rare cases, the regression is incomplete and usually surgically removed at birth. So if you're born with one, they usually just take it off. But I guess maybe if it's too big, they're like, this kid is just going to grow up with a tail. Oh, if it's too big they can't
Starting point is 01:06:25 i don't know i mean why else would they leave it around i just be different just set the kid apart a little bit yeah we all need a thing we all need a thing we all need a gimmick you had planet fitness it's gone yeah that was like your tail yeah but i could have been the tail comic. Yeah. Yeah. How was that comic last week? Well, he had a tail. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:06:50 What did he talk about? A lot of tail stuff. You can tell which jokes he liked. He's wet. He's wet. He gets. Oh, he likes this one. Oh, here we go. This must be his closer.
Starting point is 01:07:02 Here comes the punchline. He got really going up there. Knocking the water off the stool. He turns around. There you go. I'm sorry. Everything's got to be in front of him. The curtain's moving.
Starting point is 01:07:16 Yeah. When he walks to the stage, he's like, can I walk to the back A different way You get hit in the head with a backpack On a plane Boom An average sized man eats about 33 tons of food In his lifetime
Starting point is 01:07:38 Well Give or take It's about the weight of six elephants. That's how much we eat. Six elephants. That's all. You know, you'd think you'd eat more elephants than that in a lifetime.
Starting point is 01:07:53 You would have guessed more than that? Six elephants? If you think, just think of it in the elephant realm. Yeah. African elephant. You're going to eat. The big ones. The big ones.
Starting point is 01:08:04 Yeah, you're going to eat six of ones the big ones yeah you're gonna eat six of them and they brought you six and they go that's enough for your life i think got a ration yeah like day one they just give you six elephants yeah you gotta make this last buddy for your life yeah and then once you got to the first one, you're like, that was a little quicker than I planned. I'm four, and I'm already done with one. Yeah. Then two run off, and you're like, I didn't know how to lock them up. And now you're down in three. And you're like, oh, my God.
Starting point is 01:08:41 I got to eat. I flew through that first one. And then the other two kind of caught wind with what was going on and now the third one's they're pretty old to be honest can i get more elephants they go no no we gave them to you and we gave them to you um the average person produces enough saliva in their lifetime to fill two swimming pools. All right. Probably a little bit more than I thought. I don't think I would have thought.
Starting point is 01:09:16 Two swimming pools? Of spit? Yeah. Yeah, that's a lot, dude. That's way more than I would have thought. I mean, I would have guessed like this table like a cup i'll say like 10 gallons yeah yeah how often do you spit i used to spit a bunch when i was a kid well you doesn't have to come out to count just the saliva in your mouth that you swallow well then how do they count it i don't know they don't know dude that's
Starting point is 01:09:48 excellent there's no one there's no way this is all made up even knows that there's just zero chance of that there's zero chance i believe a doctor could ever know this or a scientist i just go along with it yeah right there's that's that's what you do when they tell you stuff. Yeah. Two swimming pools. Come on. I don't know. Maybe. Maybe not. Who knows? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:10:09 They can find slob whatever they want to. If they need, if you go, I got about one filled. And they go, they can find some more. And they scrape together. And that pool starts changing a little bit. And they go, that's a pretty big pool. That's an Olympic-sized pool. And you go, well, you said pool.
Starting point is 01:10:25 So above ground, kid's pool a pretty big pool. I said, Olympic size pool. You go, we said pool. So above ground, kids pool. Kiddie pool. Yeah. What kind of pool are we talking about? 50% of your hand strength comes from your pinky finger.
Starting point is 01:10:39 There's a little more, that deserves a little more respect. Yeah. The pinky finger? Yeah. 50%. You mean like grip strength? Yeah, like lift that cup without your pinky oh you can't do it can you yeah no you can but it's twice as hard so easy your hand i mean i think the most famous way of drinking is to drink with your pinky off the cuff i guess you don't want to bring your dumb gorilla hand in here knocking the china all
Starting point is 01:11:11 over the place the cutlery as you the cutlery just got you're like could you take your pinky off it's sorry and then you're like oh i'm like a ballet dancer. Speaking of cutlery, did you see the interview with, I mean, I know you didn't, but Demi Lovato was on doing some interview. And they asked her what her favorite dish was. And she was like, oh, probably coffee mugs. She thought they meant like dishes. She talked about it for a while. She was like, they can hold hot stuff. The interviewer was like, okay.
Starting point is 01:11:54 That's not really what we meant. Did you just let her go and then correct her? I think they were just nice about it. That's good. It's funny because no one ever goes, what's your favorite dish and means? Plate or cup or... Well, who would ask somebody that?
Starting point is 01:12:10 What's your favorite thing that you put food on? We should just say food. That's because the person... It's a weird way to word the question. Yeah, what's your favorite dish? That's a person that's kind of like, just ask it like we're talking, dude. Like, be normal and just say,
Starting point is 01:12:23 what's your favorite thing to eat yeah like don't say dish you say a dish the dish the guys the whoever asked the question is the problem you think yeah but i can't ever imagine thinking somebody's asking me what's your favorite like nobody asks yeah or anything i know i agree with that but like why she gets confused is because how many people go what's your favorite dish and mean like food like no one really says that either i know you say in the right circumstance you can say but if you're asking me 100 questions yeah just ask what kind of food i want to eat right it's no one's fault and i look yeah i know that this is a funny thing yes but i would say say, before you rail on one person,
Starting point is 01:13:05 let's talk about the other person. Don't say it weird, dude. Don't like, no one says it like that. I agree. That was a strange way to word it. Humans are the only animals with chins. We're the only ones. According to?
Starting point is 01:13:20 According to this. Yeah, according to this. You're telling me a gorilla doesn't have a chin? According to them, the chin has to go at least straight down or forward. It can't just proceed backwards. Yeah, that's what someone says. A scientist says he got called out. And he goes, no, but it's got to go back.
Starting point is 01:13:38 And you're like, all right, dude, it's a chin. Yeah, they pull up a gorilla. I mean, he's got a chin. It looks like a chin. Looks like a chin to me. Type in gorillas, Do they have chins? This is what we've got. This is the human body episode.
Starting point is 01:13:51 This is our tagline. Do gorillas have chins? Even chimpanzees and gorillas, our closest genetic cousins, lack chins. Instead of poking forward, their lower jaws slope down and back from their front teeth
Starting point is 01:14:05 it looks like a chin i mean that looks like a totally like a chin there yeah let's read for this a chin stroking mystery yeah what uh what was it if you go back to it said one thing is what animals have chins is the question just humans humans are the only animals that have chins according to them We're the only ones that can say it. That's why. That is true. I'm sure others have it. They'd love to tell us about it.
Starting point is 01:14:31 But they can't. You can see, like, a lot. Like, an elephant doesn't have much. You know, it just, like, goes down. It's like a lip. It's got that trunk to cover it. You could have an elephant. You could let him chew on your arm for quite a while. And it just be like it'd get slobbery one of the ones you have to eat
Starting point is 01:14:51 and he starts eating you you can't do that i and he said the elephant goes we were provided one human to eat in our lifetime that happened yeah so but that human doesn't know that so it's them against each other and he doesn't realize he's like 16 he finally goes are you serious and then they come together and they die alone at 17. your liver is the only organ that can completely regenerate itself someone donates their liver to someone, their liver will grow back to its original size in about six months. I did not know that.
Starting point is 01:15:32 It's like a lizard's tail. Yeah. Or fingernails. Someone's got to give you one. If you lost your liver, yeah. If you donated your liver, yours would grow back. Oh, mine would grow back. Oh.
Starting point is 01:15:45 So we should people just give livers away. You should give them away a lot more than you do. Once a year, just get it out of there. Yeah. You think that works an unlimited amount of times? Or at a certain point, is your body like, how long are we going to keep doing this? I Googled, could you donate a liver multiple times? And I couldn't find an answer to that.
Starting point is 01:16:03 Yeah, there's your answer to the first question. when they i mean you started just asking a couple other questions i can do this forever and then he goes i don't and that's when they go you know we're the only ones that have chins and you go are you serious that's how they get you off you you know gorilla doesn't have a chin you go well it doesn't and then once you once you start challenging that you go he goes you, you eat six elephants a year. Like in a room, you go give me six. Like you're, you don't even know what's happening. All these answers can't, it's the next question.
Starting point is 01:16:34 Yeah. Just destroys the, I don't know. I mean, why would I look that up? I know one buddy of mine, his liver grew back. So what are you talking about? That's what it would get. I got a buddy of mine his liver grew back so what he told me that's what it would get i got a buddy of mine a friend of his liver fell out and it grew back can you imagine donating your liver to see you guys in six months i'll be back your body sheds about eight pounds of dead skin a year most of those cells settle as dust in your home. Oh, that's fun.
Starting point is 01:17:07 That's what dust is, huh? A big portion of dust is dead skin cells. I feel like I didn't need to know that. Yeah. Well, you had to fill some time so we had to do it.
Starting point is 01:17:19 I'm just saying. I got plenty of stuff. Those are the good ones, though. I'm saying I want to be pretty aware of dust when I get back home. Yeah. It's just dead skin floating around. How did I know that?
Starting point is 01:17:31 Well, that seems like one of the easier ones. It seems like it makes sense, but I don't know. No, the amount that you just leave a human locked up for a year and then. See how dusty their house is? Yeah. You've lost weight. Oh, wait. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 01:17:45 This place is a mess. This've lost weight. Oh, wait. Yeah, yeah. This place is a mess. This place is a mess floating around. I remember seeing a story about a study, people that do medical studies and stuff for money, where they paid a guy, I think $30,000, $40,000 to just lie down for months and never get up. I was thinking about that. How much did you make?
Starting point is 01:18:09 That was good, Brian what what did they do they just wanted to observe the effects of lying being horizontal for a long amount of time so these people volunteered and did it and they got paid a lot of money to just lie down yeah 40 like yeah and they said it was pretty it was pretty rough yeah just oh yeah back could they stand yeah that's got to be it's got to be crazy i'll look that back i'll look that up we'll come back to it all right how fast could the human body run so far the fastest anyone has run is 27 and a half miles per hour by usain bolt one of america's greatest runners yeah he's at the world record 100 meter dash in 2009 that's the fastest but if you went 15 miles an hour um for four minutes that'd be the four minute mile 15 minute 15 miles an hour for a mile would be four minutes i should say
Starting point is 01:19:00 that's been done right yeah but when floyd basher broke the four minute mile it never been done, right? Yeah. But when Floyd Baxter broke the four-minute mile, it never had been done. And then right after that, a lot of people started doing it. But that was a big milestone. I feel like, yeah, mentally you just know. We talked about that, right? It can be real. Once you know it can be done. Then you're like, oh, we can do it.
Starting point is 01:19:17 Was it Roger Bannister? I think Floyd Bannister was a baseball player. Is it the people that made Bannisters? The Bannister brothers. The Bannister family. The Bannister brothers the banister the banister brothers in the home yeah a couple ne'er-do-wells yeah they got the least honor they made was from this track stuff yeah and now someone's broken for two miles broken the eight minute which is even more impressive somebody did two miles in seven minutes 58 seconds oh we can keep going forever i mean well when will it stop can you
Starting point is 01:19:46 there's a there's a yeah theoretically there's a there's a limit yeah you can't run a mile in 10 seconds right where is so far where is the limit what is yeah when does it stop yeah when the body reaches human body not get any better but everybody's body's always going to be different you're going to grow like that's what you always see everybody always says it like look at kids now yeah when you see young kids like kids in high school you're like were we that big in high school like i don't remember being that everybody's so big yeah and you're like i don't think we were that any i mean we had some kids that were that big but it feels feels like kids look older now, a lot quicker, all this kind of stuff.
Starting point is 01:20:31 So, yeah, I don't know. Yeah, it is a crazy thing. What would stop? Usain Bolt was the fastest. Someone's got to be faster than him. Yeah, you think hundreds of years from now, his records will look silly to people. Yeah, I don't know if they're silly.
Starting point is 01:20:48 I mean, the records always look silly anyway, and the fact that it's always like 0.5, and they're like, well, that's ridiculous. In your head, you want it to be like eight seconds. I mean, Katie Ledecky. Oh, I watched hers. Did we talk about that? We've talked about her before,
Starting point is 01:21:04 but did she just do the olympic trial yeah she did the olympic trials and i'm so i mean she doesn't even did she get it yeah yeah i mean dude no one's even did simone biles make the team yeah okay and then uh so uh the girl that came the race was the second place and the girl that did it was 15 uh which is kind of crazy and i like yeah because i have it i think i got to record it because i was a show harper uh but this girl was like 15 and then she she does it but katie ledecky's she's got the world record for her thing it's she's the first 23 records of the world record 23 wow are all her times 23 world records 23 workers 1 through 23
Starting point is 01:21:48 and i whatever i think it's the 800 is her that's and 24th is the next best person that's ever lived next best person is 24th when they showed it they go one page and they go to another page and it's and there's not even like one in the middle it's straight just her it's crazy and so like with her being that fast yeah i don't know maybe someone's gonna catch up i mean it's uh she's so i mean that's she beats him by so much they're not even in the screen you just watch her and you're almost, you can almost just watch the second race and then be like, Oh yeah. By the way,
Starting point is 01:22:28 just to forget Katie's racing and she's going to win. She won a while ago. She won a while ago. Trying to do the second half. She's up there getting a diet Coke at the concession stand and she's backing popcorn. You're like, Oh,
Starting point is 01:22:39 she's not racing this. No, no, she finished. I feel like from the sports episode, that's what I'd want to see. So is how quick we they can get out how quick can she get out and go do something yeah before they finish that's what they should do katie right when you get done i want you to go like what can you can you get a hot dog in the third row like you know can you could you by the time you get
Starting point is 01:23:02 done i don't know you've eating half the hot like you've no one's gonna come and go did you bite that hot dog they realize you've eaten enough of it
Starting point is 01:23:11 they're like that's your hot dog and how far up the stands can you get can you go buy it you know like have you already showered could you change
Starting point is 01:23:20 could you have jeans on yep could you could you have jeans on by the time everybody else finishes? That's what I was going to say. That would make the Olympics more interesting. That would get ratings up.
Starting point is 01:23:31 Then she's got something to race towards. Yeah. I mean, what is she racing to? Yeah. Well, I want you to go get some, you know, have some jeans on a hanger. In the locker room? Yeah. And she's got.
Starting point is 01:23:44 I don't know. She gets to the end and she jumps up and sprints.z yeah she's got to run and go put some jeans on i love that yeah that would make it awesome i feel like from the sports episode we talked about another swimmer that was coming on that they thought was it the 15 year old are they saying she's the next big thing uh i don't know she barely won but i'm sure she's 15 and she's going to the Olympics. She's got to be. Yeah. But no one else is even close.
Starting point is 01:24:11 Close to Katie. As a general rule, a person can survive without water for only three days. What's the rule? Three days, three weeks, three months? It's like water, three days, food, three weeks, something else, three months. I don't know. You heard that? Oxygen, three months.
Starting point is 01:24:36 I don't know. Maybe it's air, three minutes, water, three days. Yeah. That sounds right. Food, three weeks. That sounds right. People who have had hunger strikes though have gone you need that you need that you need that number though you need it all three just so you remember like that's how dumb we are should i stop hold my breath
Starting point is 01:24:56 then you go like no dude three three remember three three three yeah oh yeah because i've been drinking water my body it feels fine and but you do this every time you always think it's four four four and that's it's three three three always remember that three just every three days do something you know every three of something eat breathe what you know, just get three. Just put it on your bathroom mirror. Three should be your favorite number. Yeah. People who've done voluntary hunger strikes have gone up to two months without eating.
Starting point is 01:25:37 One guy died in prison after a 66-day hunger strike. So you can go a lot longer without food, is what I'm saying, than you can without water. How long could someone go without sleep? The record? 264 hours, which is just over 11 days. Man. Can you imagine?
Starting point is 01:25:59 11 days. Tristan just sent me a link to, apparently this is what i was thinking of this is the three days three week three months rule of adopting a dog oh it had nothing to do with what we were talking about i still think there's some i think there's something to what i said i think i i've heard that okay well you make me feel like a real idiot over here it's all about yeah three well maybe it's four four four yeah yeah i feel like i can hold my minute i can hold my breath for not three minutes i could do over three minutes no problem over three minutes all right i'll get to that i'll skip sleeping uh no the sleeping thing i don't know but you think you could hold your breath for over three minutes i think if i absolutely needed to you can always do it longer than
Starting point is 01:26:50 well i mean all right what of course like you're like if i gun to my head i'm forced underwater that's what i'm saying like yeah that's what i'm saying i think everybody could do everything i don't think anybody you're that's another plan. This is how the Krispy Kreme challenge started. This is what we've been reduced to. Holding the breath challenge. I'll eat as many Krispy Kremes as you can hold your breath. I don't think I'm going to get that many.
Starting point is 01:27:17 Let us lock you in a thing for three minutes. Like a what? A coffin or something? My dad has a lot of magic stuff i gotta i gotta i can get to a lot of things that can lock you in water yeah oh water's no water's a different well it's gotta be are you well how are they going to make you hold your breath unless you're underwater an honest guy be truthful dude and you go i swear I swear to God, I'm not doing it. You just talk like that.
Starting point is 01:27:47 I promise you, I'm not breathing. I promise you. I found it. I swear to God, I'm not breathing. The survival rules of three. I don't think that's a touchscreen, if you don't mind. Handling that computer like a gorilla just got it. You just bend it backwards.
Starting point is 01:28:01 I mean, God. Your pinky is the strongest part of your if you don't mind jamming it through that i'm that bent backwards like that was i got it man i got it hold it by the base of it yeah i mean could they have made this infographic any more difficult to read three seconds without let's follow a little loop-de-loo down here. Yeah. Three seconds without hope. Without hope.
Starting point is 01:28:29 What is that? If you have no hope, you can't survive three minutes without air, three hours without shelter. Three days without water, three weeks without food, three months without a companion. I go golfing in four hours. What shelter do I have? I guess the cart.
Starting point is 01:28:47 I've walked three hours without shelter like in a hurricane. I think it meant extreme heat or cold. This is three weeks without food, three months without water,
Starting point is 01:28:58 three days without a companion. No. I mean, no, three months without companion. This is the worst. This is the worst chart three months without companions. It's crossed up. This is the worst. This is the worst joke I've ever seen. Oh, they're saying which one's true? Why don't they just put it right next to it?
Starting point is 01:29:14 It's all supposed to be true. I can't have three months. I can't survive three months without a companion. It seems like a dream. I'd like to try. Fantasy camp. Yeah. companion it seems like a dream i'd like to try fantasy camp yeah i'd be calling my wife in two weeks how long do you uh microwave oh he's got another one here yeah yeah another another graphic rule of three okay three you can survive without air or in icy waters for three minutes you can survive without air or in icy waters for three minutes you you can survive for three hours without shelter in
Starting point is 01:29:54 a harsh environment you can survive for three days without water you can survive for three weeks without food there it is you can it's saying i know you get up to that's oh you can it's saying you can up to that's oh you can survive without ice and water for three oh i read that that was all that was the guide the dish question yeah i did that how did you read it i was reading it completely wrong i was the dish guy asking her that question that's how that was being read you you can survive like it's like it's a positive like you can survive like i easily can survive but they're saying that like a positive. Like you can survive. Like I easily can survive. But they're saying that like, no, this is all you can do. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:30:29 Three hours without shelter in a harsh environment. Which those naked and afraid is that three days without water, three weeks without food. Wow. All basic. Your body tells you this. Not if you don't know those rules. You've got the four steps. Well, maybe you're good if you don't know those rules you've got the force well maybe
Starting point is 01:30:45 good if you don't know the rules maybe you can do four days because you're you know you're like well i didn't know there was three you go how do you not die well i never heard of these rules and you can actually go to four i went 48 years without a companion yeah i mean come on. Barely had shelter. So sleeping, a 17-year-old high school student set the world record for longest going out sleeping. That was the guy who went over 11 days. But after three or four nights without sleep, you will start to hallucinate. I bet I could do longer than people. I could do longer than a normal person i i never just nod
Starting point is 01:31:28 off really never i mean no you never just watch golf on the couch and just fall asleep no and the only way is if i like really did something like if i am not on much sleep and i'm laying there and like i could close my eyes but I don't like I never wake up and go I've been asleep for an hour or something like that like I never not off I mean I try to think I had yesterday we had our uh golf club championship this weekend and I've been getting up at like seven every day I don't go back to like two so I'm not on much sleep I lay there and watch golf and I mean I would I would close my eyes trying to go to but I'm trying to go sleep I I lay there and watch golf. And I would close my eyes trying to go to – but I'm trying to go to sleep.
Starting point is 01:32:05 I don't ever just like – just not off. My club championship, I just missed the top 25 this weekend. 26? There's only 26 players. There's only 26 players. That was my big thing all weekend was just to go just trying to battle out for a top 25 how many players are there 26 uh what's the longest you guys have gone without sleep uh because you slept probably a couple days you slept for 24 hours i slept for over 24. Yeah. I used to pull all-nighters all the time in school.
Starting point is 01:32:48 And I think I've done two in a row. I think I've done. 48 hours. Yeah. Maybe a little less than that. I think I've done about the same. You choose some of your weird flights. And I don't just fall asleep.
Starting point is 01:33:00 I have a hard time kind of getting there. So, yeah. What's yours, Brian? I remember once staying up in college all night to finish a paper and turn it in early that morning. Yeah. So it was probably close to 24 hours. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:33:13 But that's it. I need a lot of sleep. Yeah. Like a koala bear. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know if they need sleep. I you're right don't they yeah don't they sleep it feels like a koala bear yeah don't you think there's probably a good animal to describe for
Starting point is 01:33:33 you it's like a sweet animal you know it's like sweet weak they sleep 18 has to stay kind of really up and high and yeah and And can't Can't afford to get attacked Wouldn't last long Wouldn't last long Koalas sleep 18 to 22 hours a day So you nailed it Yeah But they did a study on people's sleep habits
Starting point is 01:34:01 And found if you regularly got 4 hours of sleep At night, that was the equivalent of adding eight years of aging to your brain. So it's bad. Yeah. Bad to not get sleep. That was word of the can thing. First I'm like, oh, it's a good thing.
Starting point is 01:34:19 Wait. Alright, so now we're getting to breathing. How long could someone go without breathing permanent brain damage begins after only four minutes without oxygen so that's a three through three is a lie well if you get to four minutes you're gonna have brain damage but so yeah maybe maybe stop at three but what's the record of holding breath? So the record just got set. March of this year, a guy in Croatia held his water underwater for 24 minutes. Held his water underwater? I'm sorry.
Starting point is 01:34:52 Held his breath underwater. Yeah. Okay. He brought his own water to this? Is there some water that's a little like, oh, why is the middle of that water looks weird? Yeah. I don't trust these results so how long uh 24 minutes he held his breath underwater for 24 minutes that's longer than episode of friends they said or any sitcom
Starting point is 01:35:15 what what was the record before that i don't know david blaine's done it for like David Blaine did I remember this David Blaine did it for 17 minutes Yeah So 24 minutes To beat it by 7 For oxygen assisted Static Acne
Starting point is 01:35:32 What is this 17 minutes I just don't know If I believe this You can hold your breath For 17 And this dude did 23 minutes
Starting point is 01:35:44 He said he trained his uh heartbeat to slow down and yeah if you can train yourself yeah your pulse is so slow when you're holding it like 10 or something crazy it says most people can hold their breath somewhere between 30 seconds and two minutes navy seals can hold their breath underwater for two to three minutes, sometimes more. And they did 23 minutes. This one guy did 24 minutes, 37 seconds. But I want to, is it just as simple as holding your breath? Like most of us have seen.
Starting point is 01:36:17 I got to be honest, that does not look like the guy who I think would have the record. That guy looks like he has no lung capacity whatsoever. Yeah, he's like in his 50s or 56 there he is right there but he did it to raise awareness for he broke the world record for the long first time hearing about it i mean to go he's got brain damage just uh he got brain damage like eight what is like eight times over seven or, I was a little seven times over. I'm not seven, six times over. And then,
Starting point is 01:36:48 and then you're going, and he's like, well, I'm raising awareness to what? It was something in Croatia. Can you imagine coming out of the water after 24 minutes? They're waiting to interview.
Starting point is 01:37:00 What's your favorite dish? Yeah. Coffee mug. Sorry. Plate. I don't know. let me just catch my breath you go i don't know i said coffee stupid uh plate you know i'm sorry let me get my brain a bowl a bowl that's yeah okay go ahead and they're like now your food it says he broke the record for the longest time breath held voluntarily and they stipulated that like somebody somebody who didn't want to held it for 30 minutes or something yeah it's a great seinfeld joke the involuntary the bobsled. The involuntary, the bobsled.
Starting point is 01:37:46 Involuntary. The luge, right? The luge. Yeah. He goes, ah, they put you on it. He goes, didn't even want to do it. World record. He just threw him down there.
Starting point is 01:37:59 So how long could a person live? A recent study said that even if you survive all diseases, like they cured cancer, everything, and you didn't get hit by a bus, the longest our bodies can just hold up is somewhere between 120 to 150 years. That's pretty long. Yeah. The world record is 122 years. Wow. That's the longest person to ever live?
Starting point is 01:38:19 Mm-hmm. Just seen everything. When did she die? She died in 1997. I mean, just. Man, she was born in 1870 she said i want to see nate graduate yeah and i'm out 1875 she was born 1875 so i mean she remembered the 1800s like talk about she was an adult and she's adult yeah she could drive 25 i mean she was huh she could drive they know cars not legally yeah yeah uh she i mean that person's got to be like i uh what is it 1925, she's 50. Yeah. She's 50 in 1925.
Starting point is 01:39:09 But she didn't just die. She died over 20 years ago. She couldn't vote until her 40s. You know, that's pretty wild. Yeah. And then she stuck around another 70 years. Yeah. Wow.
Starting point is 01:39:25 Good for her. So there's a lady in West Virginia who holds the record for recovering from death. She was declared clinically dead for 17 hours after doctors failed to detect brain activity. Her son stated that her skin had already started to harden. Her hands and toes were curling up. They were already drawn up. She was taken off life support and funeral arrangements were in progress.
Starting point is 01:39:48 However, 10 minutes after being taken off life support, she revived and recovered. I know she's doing. I tried to see if she was still alive. Got hit by a bus on the way out. I know, I know. Oh, man. This happened in 2008,
Starting point is 01:39:59 and I Googled her name to see if she's still alive, and I couldn't find her. Velma Thomas. How could you not find her? There's Velma Thomas's's but not the one that i don't think that's the story you read that nbc abc news yes yes this is not the right person at all all right i'll get back to it. I mean, how does this... I mean, you can Google me and find a lot of stuff out, and a lady that... She lived until she was 94.
Starting point is 01:40:33 Thelma Thomas passed away in 2019. It's super easy to figure that out. Well, that's not her. That's not her? Well, she was 59 in 2008. So unless she really aged when she came back to life, that ain't her. Things just move a little faster after an experience like that, man. So, yeah.
Starting point is 01:40:53 I mean, I found that person, but. All right. Woodbury, Tennessee. She's from here. Different Velma. There's a lot of Velmas out there. Yeah. A lot of them. There's a lot of Velmas out there yeah a lot of them there's a lot of
Starting point is 01:41:06 velmas i didn't know that was an actual name it's a good name to survive death that's on this story uh i mean i knew velma from scooby-doo and i thought that was a made-up name for the show no no scooby was uh is that what got you headed that direction? Was it because you said Scooby? What? What do you mean? Because Scooby was a made-up name, and then you said Velma. You go, there's another one. Pretty good.
Starting point is 01:41:35 No. It's just I've never. There's Dale. Have you ever met a Velma before? Velma lives in Woodbury. Yeah. We can't even find out if she's still alive yeah you don't know her she's doing fine uh i don't know if i've ever met a velma
Starting point is 01:41:50 yeah yeah i've never met a shaggy either no but shaggy's it sounds like a made-up name yeah so does that's why so does scooby because it's like sc Scooby's a dog. The rest are people. Don't ruin it for me. Shaggy is like shaggy clothes. I was thinking Shaggy. I know Dan Shaggy.
Starting point is 01:42:18 But they're shaggy clothes. Like Shaggy's like a term. He was like a hippie, right? Velma's like a name, yeah. He's a what? Like a hippie? Yeah. I would think Velma's just like an old. I would think was like a name. Yeah. He's a what? Like a hippie? Yeah. I would think Velma's just like an old... I would think it's a...
Starting point is 01:42:28 Like Myrtle? Yeah. Myrtle's, yeah. Mm-hmm. You know? I've never met a Myrtle either. I don't know. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:42:38 So how much exercise is good for you? Oh, jeez. All right, here we go, Aaron. Why do moderate runners have lower risk of death than people who don't exercise. But in a surprising turn, people who ran too much actually had a greater risk of death.
Starting point is 01:42:51 Yeah. Ha ha. All right. Take that. Let's get some... Get some good stuff? I mean... What?
Starting point is 01:43:00 That's... I think we've been doing some good stuff. We have been and you just went exercise. I was getting Mr been doing some good stuff. We have been, and you just went exercise. I was getting Mr. Planet Fitness over here. I just read the basic.
Starting point is 01:43:11 Hey, everybody, if you run, it's good for you. But if you did it too much, I guess it would be bad for you. I think most people would think the most extreme athletes would be the people best in shape. They are the best in shape they're like they're absolutely the best but not the healthiest i would bet they're the healthiest for you to even get to that level you have to you eat well did you read hear what i just read that if you do extreme you have a greater risk of death because you're climbing a rock you're on the side of a cliff that's why like you're not
Starting point is 01:43:46 it's you know this is ultra marathon people yeah you're putting yourself in heat exhaust those guys are in the their activity that they're doing can put them in a bad position but they're healthier than a guy that runs in better shape than a guy that goes, I run a mile a day. Yes. Scientists believe weightlifters have reached their saturation point by how much we can lift. Like there's not going to be any more. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:44:15 The record for heaviest deadlift, the guy lifted 580 pounds from the floor over his head. He lifted over 1,000 floor over his head. He lifted over 1,000 up to his thigh. 580 pounds?
Starting point is 01:44:30 Yeah. Over his head. God. That's so much. This guy looks weak, dude. These guys, I mean, these guys look insane. The world's strongest men.
Starting point is 01:44:41 Yeah. They just, they look like you're telling me me and them are the same thing. No, you're healthier. That guy's going to have a heart attack. I think they have chins. Do you guys know how many bones we have in our body?
Starting point is 01:45:01 206. Yeah. Yeah, that's what you were going to say too, right? Yeah, I don't know. I was going to say, I don't care. But 206. Yeah. Yeah, that's what you were going to say too, right? Yeah, I don't know. I was going to say I don't care, but 206 is a good one. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:45:10 Yeah. All right. You're right. I don't care. But we're born with 300, but then some of these bones fuse together. Where?
Starting point is 01:45:19 Where are that? In the hands? Mm-hmm. More than half of your bones are located in your hands, wrists, feet, and ankles. It's a song. Head, shoulders, knees, and toes.
Starting point is 01:45:31 Yeah. That's where that came from. Yeah. All right. So it gets some steam going. I do the human body episode with Andy. Every episode. Every second
Starting point is 01:45:49 your body produces approximately 25 million new cells. Where do the old ones go? That's a good question. I guess they're dust also. Yeah. They become dust. Well, the spleen filters them and cleans them. We learned that earlier.
Starting point is 01:46:06 That's true. About 60% of your body is made up of water. Okay. Like the earth, like the lakes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's a great office quote, by the way.
Starting point is 01:46:18 What? Just, there is a small part of me that's excited about these changes, but 70% of me that's excited about these changes but 70 of me is water uh do we wrap this up yeah um like done done yeah uh like there's anywhere between 60,000 to 100,000 miles of blood vessels in the human body okay 160,000 miles it'd be enough to travel around the world more than three times. Yeah, that's crazy. It's crazy. Had they tried to do that, you think?
Starting point is 01:46:48 Yeah. I don't know. I didn't Google it. They looked it up. Is there, was there, yeah, that was basically, right? I think that's about as good as I'm going to get. Yeah. Yeah, it ran its course.
Starting point is 01:46:59 Yep. You know? This was like, I think this would be, if this episode is a human body, this guy, you know, he died at like 43, 44. And it was, I don't think it was a surprise. People didn't even ask how he died. There you go. I've been waiting for this call for quite a while. According to your bio on the internet, this is your birthday, June 30th.
Starting point is 01:47:35 Oh, today's the day? Yeah. So happy 43rd birthday. Thank you. Yeah. June 30th. Yeah. All right.
Starting point is 01:47:44 All right. That's it uh let's go folks let's start doing that we'll figure that out don't worry about the polls yet i'm where it'll be in a few weeks it's propaganda think about it yeah thank you yeah this is about to be think about it they just think about it that's all i'm asking all right see y' all next week. Thanks, everybody, for listening to the Nate Land Podcast. Be sure to subscribe to our show on iTunes, Spotify, wherever you listen to your podcasts.
Starting point is 01:48:25 And please remember to leave us a rating or a comment. Nate Land is produced by me, Nate Bargetzi, and my wife, Spotify, you know, wherever you listen to your podcasts. And please remember to leave us a rating on comedy. Nate Land is produced by me, Nate Bargetzi, and my wife, Laura, on the All Things Comedy Network. Recording and editing for the show is done by Genovation Consulting in partnership with Center Street Media. Thanks for tuning in. Be sure to catch us next week on the Nate Land Podcast.

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