The Nateland Podcast - #58 The Olympics

Episode Date: August 4, 2021

This episode, Nate, Breakfast, and Aaron have Olympic fever. The guys question how far back in time they would have to go to win an Olympic event, what event they would choose to best blend in if they... had to go undercover, how Jesus would fare in the Olympics, and incorrectly question why soccer isn't an Olympic sport (it is).   Co-hosts: Brian Bates ( https://www.instagram.com/brianbatescomic) & Aaron Weber ( https://www.instagram.com/realaaronweber)   Podcast produced by Nate & Laura Bargatze Recording & Editing by Genovations Media https://www.natebargatze.com https://www.allthingscomedy.com https://www.genovationsmedia.com Email - Nateland@NateBargatze.com

Transcript
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Starting point is 00:00:00 hello folks welcome to nateland podcast uh i'm nate bargetzi aaron weber brian bates uh all right welcome everybody uh this is it hello Hello, folks. Let's go, folks. I did it. Forget it. I'm getting more down. I'll slowly just be like, I'm close to being like, all right, that's fine. Hello, folks. Just giving up. Just giving up. This team. Maybe I don't have the fight in me today. Yeah. You both did an arena this weekend. Did you start your set that way? Did you say hello, folks, out there, Brian? I said hello, folks, and he said, let's go, folks.
Starting point is 00:00:50 Yeah, that's how we started it. I didn't say – no, you always say folks. No, I do if it's a show like with you, like the podcast, live podcast and stuff. Yeah, yeah. At places that I don't think they're going to know what I'm talking about, I don't. I thought you said goodbye, folks, or something. I thought you always just say it. I didn't this weekend.
Starting point is 00:01:11 Oh. Yeah. Yeah, this weekend was good. We were with Lee and Morgan. Very, very funny Lee and Morgan. And we did Hattiesburg, Mississippi. Had a great show. Very hot down there. Yeah. a great show uh very hot down there yeah yeah it's
Starting point is 00:01:27 very hot and the air condition wasn't pumping as always make shows tough but everybody was like cool and like you know it's always like hard because it's hot but just everybody was like cool about it someone tried to walk on stage really on me with me well they did walk on stage uh you know i don't know what was you know it's one of those where you're like kind of felt like bless his heart like i don't know if yeah something is yeah uh but he just is on the stage it wasn't like an aggressive walk on no it was a bless his heart there's a bless his heart walk on stage where you go all right there's that yes probably one of our folks yeah that is a big difference there's either
Starting point is 00:02:06 there's a mean walk on stage and there's a wow look at bless his heart it was the it was so funny though i mean you played off of it yeah so long it was great it was hot and they just felt yeah i mean he just came on up and you're like all right to say hi to you? No, no. Just I think he was leaving or something. He was hot. He was trying to exit the building. OK. So you're disoriented from the heat or something. Yeah, and just thought, yeah, that's what I was thinking.
Starting point is 00:02:35 Like those steps. Like he just saw those steps and was like, I guess that's the, you know. Yeah, and we'll get out of here. And he walked right up them and, you know. You know, I noticed the next night there was some music that came into your monitor. Yeah. And you were on the same joke both nights. The eagle joke?
Starting point is 00:02:52 Yeah. Oh, yeah. It's kind of weird. Yeah, that's crazy. That's usually when stuff goes wrong. Yeah. Yeah, the next night. So the Hattiesburg show was great, though.
Starting point is 00:03:04 What is it? Laugh to Live? Laugh for Life. Laugh for Life. the next night. So the Hattiesburg show is great though. This, what is it? Laugh, Laugh to Live. Laugh for Life. Laugh for Life. Great.
Starting point is 00:03:11 There's a guy, Kent, down there that's, I've done the show before. They've had me, and then they had me back with Leanne. And they're, it's just,
Starting point is 00:03:17 they do a whole great thing down there and raise a lot of money. And it's a, it's a cool, Hattiesburg, golfed at Hattiesburg Country Club. Nice.
Starting point is 00:03:26 Moved around, played in three hours. Really? Yeah. That's pretty quick. I mean, I thought I was going to – not out there. I did better than I expected. Going in, I was like, there's no way I'll do 18. It was like 110-degree index, and I did pretty well.
Starting point is 00:03:39 He finished 18. I thought for sure him and Travis, my tour manager, I thought, well, I'm going to lose them both. Yeah. Yeah. But before we teed off off that's a great country club and like i got played there last time so the guy and i was i just was like there wasn't really mad out there because it's so hot it wasn't too crowded and i asked for all of us our own cards i was like do you care if we just all take our own cards that's a huge that's the only reason they finished yeah i'm convinced because that added you can still move around quick but that added of him and travis uh they can hit their
Starting point is 00:04:11 balls in some pretty different directions and if they both had to drive to each other's balls to wait for the other person to hit two times before they move the cart that's basically what they do two hits and then they finally can go, we can go now. That's what you can tell if you're hitting the ball good or not in golf, is if you get out of your cart and hit twice before you get back in your cart. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:04:35 That means you didn't hit that far. Right. You're just like, I'll just walk. I'll up and bet a bunch. You're keeping the same club. Yep. It's very funny to think about. It's like a walk of shame. Yeah. You hit two shots. Two of your strokes are the exact same club. Yep. It's very funny to think about. It's like a walk of shame.
Starting point is 00:04:45 Yeah. You hit two shots. Two of your strokes are the exact same club, not that far from each other. I played golf this weekend for the first time. Oh. First time. First time playing 18 holes actually on a real golf course. I played with my father-in-law.
Starting point is 00:05:01 And there were a couple times where we were hitting from the white te tees yeah where i hit it to like the next set of tees so i just walked up and drove it again yeah a couple times where that happened yeah yeah to the women tees yeah yeah i've done that numerous times and i just have to re-tee off from the women's tees right yeah something funny about golf is i bad hit bad hit it's no fun and then you get one good hit, and I was like, all right, I'm in for the rest of this. That's the big famous one in 18. Sometimes people start off, well, there's a very funny golf game where someone starts on one. I'll do it, too.
Starting point is 00:05:36 I'll birdie one, and I'm like, about to go low today. And then you just, it's a train wreck until you get to 18. Then you birdie 18, and you're like, all right, all right. I think I figured something out. I got it. I got it. I'll go again tomorrow. It's tough.
Starting point is 00:05:52 I'm playing this week. If this comes out, I'm playing right now. If you're watching this on Wednesday at St. Jude, my first pro-am, celebrity pro-am. St. Jude in Memphis, pretty pumped. Penny Hardaway is going to be there, Mike Conley. Nice. Yeah. A bunch of other people.
Starting point is 00:06:13 There's only two names I kind of quickly saw. Do you know who you're playing with? No. We do the pairing. I think we go Tuesday. So we go tomorrow. They have a dinner, and they have a pairing. Tea time, 7.
Starting point is 00:06:28 Or we've got to be at the van to go over there at 7.30 a.m., which is an early one. Right. But that's better than, you know, I just wake up at 7, just kind of hit it, and then go over. But I'm excited. First one, I'll play. I'll see what I end up shooting.
Starting point is 00:06:47 Because they'll be playing. What's crazy is the pros play the next day. So you're playing it in as good, probably the best shape the golf course is going to be in. Because they have a real tournament that weekend. Yeah, the next day is the real tournament. Wow. Do you know what you shot?
Starting point is 00:07:01 Oh, no, dude. I wouldn't even. Half the time, I just drop the ball where my father-in-law was. And that's what you should do. Right. That's good. You just play like that. Just like sometimes it's like if a ball goes crazy,
Starting point is 00:07:13 I'll just drop it. You don't worry about it. Yeah. I hit a house. I was hitting it into the water. I was really. Anyway, dude, on the par four, I had a nice drive. I did seven iron.
Starting point is 00:07:24 Nice hit. I'm on the green. I'm like three feet. I'm about to birdie. I'm like a real birdie. Yeah. And I just missed it by about 30 feet, the putt. I got so mad.
Starting point is 00:07:32 On a three-foot putt? Yeah, dude. You're back off the green? Launched it off the green. Yeah, yeah. Get your pigeon wedge back out? I had to, yeah. Went off the green.
Starting point is 00:07:41 Yeah. But it was fun, man. Those are the tough ones when they go. He had a putt like that. Didn't you have like a – That went way long? He would make – Brian, a very long putt. I mean, dude, he would – the ball would stop next to the hole.
Starting point is 00:07:55 50, 60 feet every single time. 10 feet, he putts it 260 feet. And then goes back. But, I mean, it was crazy because it was like that it was a long putt he was just he read it great it always ended up next to the hole it was always like that's good yeah and then but a 10 footer he'd have a 10 footer for i think he had a birdie putt or par like a legit and then just woof the ball like it just you know the hole never saw the ball that's how fast it went by.
Starting point is 00:08:26 He goes, what? You guys were already up here? I didn't even. And they go, yeah, he came right by you. No, I didn't see it. I didn't see it. I get nervous when I get close. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:08:34 I believe it. Yeah. Everybody does. I was out there in long pants in Charleston like an idiot. Why did you do that? I bought a bunch of golf clothes before i lost any weight yeah so i had some long pants and like a big golf shirt and it's all i had so it's like 110 degrees in charleston yeah i'm in these long pants in this shirt i felt like an idiot i was so hot the whole time you look
Starting point is 00:08:56 like a guy that knows what he's doing that's the that's the bad part like if you got pants on in that heat you're like the other people are like, that guy better be going low. Or you look like something's wrong with you. I think they watch. It's a bless his heart. Yeah, it's a bless his heart. It kind of comes back. You go, and then people walk over.
Starting point is 00:09:13 You go, he's got gout. I think they watch me for 30 seconds, and they realize. They go, what did they say? He's got gout. He's got gout. Don't worry about him. And they go, did you have to wear pants? You go, wouldn't you if you had gout?
Starting point is 00:09:26 And then they go, yeah. Nobody wants to see that. Yeah, I guess you're right. I thought gout was just your feet. I go, but it goes up. Spreading. His you can tell about calf down. Watch him hit this shot.
Starting point is 00:09:38 That's what they say. He can tell the gout from about calf down. You know, it's the first pitch out of the sounds game. They're willing him out there. I'm going to prop them up. I have one of those robot chairs that stands them up. He's going to throw it and sit back down. Did you see the first pitch that went viral this weekend?
Starting point is 00:09:54 So many people tagged me in it. She's a gymnast or something. Oh, yeah. Who did like a backflip. Yeah, in the splits. Should I try something like that? Yeah, she didn't go up on top of the mound. I know.
Starting point is 00:10:04 Yeah. If I do that from the top of the mound, I think that'll take me to the next level. Yeah, that'd be even better. If you did the splits, you would be on everything. Do it, Aaron. Yeah. Can you do the splits? Is that one of your hidden talents?
Starting point is 00:10:18 I haven't in a while. I haven't in a while. You haven't in a while. In a while. How long is a while? Probably since I was six or seven. I might have been able to do the splits back then i'll stretch you know i'll get ready for it i'll do i'll do something yeah are you gonna be that like is it gonna be that
Starting point is 00:10:34 annoying like guy that tries something and everybody's like all right dude just throw the ball like that's that's that's what i'm saying i know don't that's the thing don't be that guy the guy that goes no dude be that guy. The guy that goes. No, dude, be that guy. There's always, but they go, he goes, watch this. And then everybody goes, oh God, no one. All right. He's a gout survivor.
Starting point is 00:10:54 They're not going to boo him. They're going to be impressed you walked out there. You wear a gout survivor shirt. I'm going to have that as my tagline on the Jumbo Tri. Do hashtag gout survivor. A shirt. Yeah. Yeah. It's in. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:11:05 It's in remission. Yeah. Is it? Yeah. Gout out of here. Something like that. Is that a good saying? Three strikes your gout.
Starting point is 00:11:15 Yeah, three strikes your gout. Oh, that's awesome. Three strikes your gout. Strikeout gout. Strikeout gout. Strikeout gout. Yeah. That's hashtag strikeout gout strikeout gout strikeout gout that's hashtag
Starting point is 00:11:25 strikeout gout dude we met that guy I'm kicking around some ideas we met a folk this weekend and he had a
Starting point is 00:11:33 Nate Land coffee mug and I signed it breakfast baits and I mean 30 seconds later I just hear and it shattered all over the floor
Starting point is 00:11:44 I was so excited my first autograph and I just hear and it's shattered i was so excited my first autograph and i just and i saw a little piece of breakfast just go flying across the room he dropped it was it unintentional he said it was yeah i didn't get eyes on him when he did it yeah he got i signed it after it broke uh he uh you could tell that is your first signature. As you can see, your autograph, it's all written out. Your first autographs, you're always like, oh, you can't believe it. I mean, you write it like the way you sign a check for the first time where you just sign your whole name.
Starting point is 00:12:18 Basically in print. Yeah, you're just basically like. It was print, yeah. Yeah. I remember my first autograph I ever signed was at Rascals Comedy Club. And I have a video of it. It's my first YouTube video I have where my head's shaved in Rascals Comedy Club. I don't even know when it is.
Starting point is 00:12:38 And I remember I signed it. You might be able to look up. In Massachusetts or New Jersey? New Jersey. It's on YouTube. And then it's, it was just, God, it was so old. That's it. 2000, no, that's not 2018.
Starting point is 00:12:55 It's what it was posted for. Yeah, but this is when it was posted. So this was the first show I ever did. And I had a video, and I destroyed destroyed i murdered i remember i like i'm it was like going there and i murdered and then they uh this guy afterwards came up and asked for my autograph and i was like i told him i go you're my first autograph and i think i signed on his ticket you're my first autograph yeah and i wrote that it's like carlos gross told me yeah and then yeah did he really well i'm just now but i'm gonna guess i was first and last yeah and uh yeah so i told him
Starting point is 00:13:32 that and then he said oh uh you know probably just threw that ticket away now i might have bounced me then i didn't sign another one for a few years and i told that person i think you're my first autograph you gotta just keep telling people that. There's like 12 people out there. That are going like, I thought I was your first. He goes, no, no, there's been a few of them. eBay's full of them. Yeah, I don't know.
Starting point is 00:13:56 I wish you could see when the year was. I want to say it was 2006 or something like that. Four, maybe? Six. I remember her hosting. Looks like a great intro. Yeah. Just getting them fired up do five minutes head how old are you at this point i i mean i don't know i just started so i mean whatever year it is 2006 i mean you have to be like 26 something like that yeah 27 i don't know something like that what is that uh crushed
Starting point is 00:14:22 your chance is that a predator shirt i don't know no what you know this is the look out southern dude i think i got my i might have my hat in my back pocket i mean look at that i have a what's the necklace i used to always wear that neck puka shell i'm wearing rubber bands on my hand it's's a look. It's a look. Hat in the back pocket. You look very casual. There ain't nothing more Southern than just wearing your hat in your back pocket. You used to lean a lot on stuff, didn't you? Yeah, especially then.
Starting point is 00:14:55 I mean, you're on, you know, I feel like there you're, the crowd's so close to you that you're just kind of, you know, you're almost like, these people need to back off a little bit. But, you know, I just got, you go to New Jersey with that accent. That was an easy, that was an easy team up for me. Well, hat, people just, I don't, you know, he's got his hat in his back pocket. Someone asked me to change the rule right after the show. Sir, can you, my car won't start. You think you could give us help?
Starting point is 00:15:27 Comments. Timothy Sanderson. Hello, folks, Alaskan born and raised here. It was great hearing how much Aaron loved his trip. I met Stubbs, the cat mayor of Talkitina. Talkitina. Talkitina. Yeah. Talkitinaina that sound like a robot trying to say he had more of a presence in his city council meetings than brinks home security has on his
Starting point is 00:15:54 on this podcast love you all thanks for the weekly laughs man i don't think that was a hard sentence and i felt like it was just i had had trouble with it. Well, we're just getting warmed up. We're just getting warmed up. Here's Stubbs, by the way. This is the honorary mayor of Talkeetna for 20 years. You'll like this, Nate. On August 31st, 2013, Stubbs was attacked and mauled by a dog while roaming the streets. Mayor got attacked by a wild dog.
Starting point is 00:16:22 That's Alaska for you. Yeah. Well, I hope they got that dog. That dog still might be locked up. I saw something with Alaska, not like a fact. Oh, I saw it on Instagram or something, something about the train that you waved down, the last flag stop. Oh, the whistle stop train?
Starting point is 00:16:43 The whistle stop train. Yeah. I just saw randomly someone, it was like a post that's, something I follow that's like, you know, like, weird facts or something like that. And it said that. Alaska has the last train. I already knew that. Clyde Wakefield.
Starting point is 00:16:59 Is anyone else worried that all Aaron thought about on his honeymoon was murder and suicide? And still there's no Barnaby just throwing out random wikipedia facts about mountain peaks while his colleague is ready to check out classic episode classic classic i didn't think i was ready to check out last week i thought i was in it you were in it yeah and i think there's a comment coming up no i think he i think he means aaron check out on life oh oh while his colleague is ready to check out i think he means i'm still throwing out these random dumb facts while aaron's giving us signals that talking about suicide yeah that's fair yeah clyde is a you don't see that name very often clyde yeah bonnie Mm-hmm. That's about it. Clyde. It's a good name.
Starting point is 00:17:46 Clyde. Wakefield. Yeah. Wakefield sounds different than the... You don't see Clyde with the Wakefield. No. No. Sounds different. Might have married into that name.
Starting point is 00:18:00 Probably not in Alaska. Yeah. Trey Eubanks. The guy supposedly mauled by the bear may not have been telling the truth it said that he actually wrecked his ATV was too embarrassed to admit it the bear clock the bear claw marks were made by a screwdriver and they found untouched bacon in his trailer I'm not sure about the bacon I guess he just means The bear If he was there to maul He would grab that bacon Yeah
Starting point is 00:18:26 But I guess I guess the guy made the whole story up Because he was so embarrassed Which story was it? This is the This is the bear attack Where the guy said The bear was stalking him
Starting point is 00:18:37 And he had to keep hiding In his Little Until someone Rescued him Yeah And then And he so
Starting point is 00:18:44 He got mauled and he did it with a screwdriver. He faked it. He wrecked his ATV. According to Trey, wrecked his ATV. Too embarrassed to admit.
Starting point is 00:18:52 I don't know why. He's probably drunk? Inebriated, yeah. Well, if someone told him you better not go ride that thing, you don't know how.
Starting point is 00:19:01 He goes, you ain't gonna tell me what to do. His wife. I know how to ride this. Yeah. It's and he goes and wrecks it immediately this all happened 50 feet from his house that's what they did he also doesn't mention he just can see his house you better not ride that thing i'm all right all next to it. He's just having a scrape.
Starting point is 00:19:27 He goes, I got tech, Bobby. This was all eight minutes. Eight minutes from him leaving the house. Like that's not mentioned. He goes, what? I told you. I can ride it. Mike Terry.
Starting point is 00:19:42 Great episode, guys. Nate was on his game. I love it when he's Interested in the topic Because he really ups The comedy I know someone's Got to bring it
Starting point is 00:19:50 Occasionally you're interested This is one of them Yeah How you feeling about today? Prediction? I don't know Prediction for today Brian? I don't know
Starting point is 00:20:00 I'm not feeling good Yeah I feel like we're off To a good start I think we're off To a good start I mean I we're off to a good start. I mean, I think my off days are still better than y'all's. So I've been killing it since 1975.
Starting point is 00:20:16 Rascals. Caitlin Blanchard. We've talked about the Blanchard. Yeah, the Blanchard boys. Blanchard boys. Caitlin. It's a girl. We talked about her family. Yeah they have a sister there but if you if there's a blanchard boys there's always a sister right
Starting point is 00:20:32 they protect and yeah they protect she's usually probably the toughest one she's the one that you know stops and says give me your money and you're, get out of here, Caitlin. And her brothers sit there. And you're like, Caitlin, dad's coming. And then you got to give her your milk money. I think I just took milk money to school. Did you ever take? You just take the change to buy one milk? I mean, that sounds like something you would accuse me of doing. I think I did it when I think about it. Did not why did you only get milk did you not maybe get your
Starting point is 00:21:09 lunch free okay or you bring your own no maybe you pay for your lunch and it was like a dollar 25 or something so it wasn't just milk money yeah but i but i call it that for some reason because i think you would get those the school would provide the lunch, and then you could get water or something, and you'd have to pay for milk. Maybe in the morning? Maybe. Yeah. Did you ever have a milkman, Brian?
Starting point is 00:21:33 No. Yeah. I felt like you grew up with one. Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah, I could see that. Y'all didn't have one? We're too far out in the country. Oh, yeah?
Starting point is 00:21:42 Yeah. You got it from the cow? Yeah. Straight from the source. Oh, yeah? Yeah. You got it from the cow? Yeah. Straight from the source. They were milk, yeah. Did you ever have milk, man? You're like, I didn't come from money, man. This is not old money right here.
Starting point is 00:21:56 That's like old money that owned the head of milk, man. Caitlin Blanchard, I was hysterically laughing during Nate's reasoning for why it should be pronounced validity instead of valididity. I think it's backwards. Now I'm backwards. Pronounce valididity instead of validity. Oh, yeah, valididity is fun. After I recovered, I remembered it a few minutes and started laughing again, just in time for Nate to pronounce podiatrist.
Starting point is 00:22:23 And I lost it. Just fantastic. Thank you all for continuing to be the bright spot in my wednesdays uh caitlin's taking a turn from her early days of taking people's money she's now very sweet yeah that's good uh sheridan mack i didn't i didn't send a comment last week because i was sure someone else would say something, and also because my comments never get read. However, as a teacher, as told my students about this podcast, I have to do my duty and correct you. Antibiotics
Starting point is 00:22:54 treat bacterial infections, not viruses. Please make this correction. It's because of misuse and misinformation that antibiotic resistance is an increasing problem wow i don't remember we're contributing to a problem that was from the discoveries episode we're talking about penicillin yeah i think i said something about treating the flu virus and yeah
Starting point is 00:23:19 that was i think that's what she's referring to right Oh, because antibiotics treat the infection, not viruses. I'm pretty sure if someone's not getting a shot, it's not because of that. Well, people are tuning into this podcast for medical advice. I would encourage her to not tell her kids, students, to watch this podcast.
Starting point is 00:23:40 I feel like that's so she's saying no one's taking antibiotics, like medicine? Yeah. Resistance, because it treats the infection, not the virus. There's no reason. So if someone's not taking medicine, they're not going. It's because it treats the virus.
Starting point is 00:23:58 Like there's, no one's saying that reason. If you're not taking medicine, you're being like, I ain't taking medicine. I ain't putting that voodoo stuff in my body. Like that what i would say yeah you don't say this reason i wouldn't know but look but she's i would say this podcast all it is is misinformation that's the closest we've ever came yeah yeah the comment should have said i'll be honest you guys you guys were at least in the ballpark we were at least in the rightpark. We were at least in the right, like, you know, they go, yeah. We asked the question, they go, yeah, she's actually right over there. And we go, oh, we're, all right.
Starting point is 00:24:34 But yeah, but don't, you know. Paul Collier. I was at the same Dodgers-Giants game Nate was at, Nate was at, and am ashamed of what I did. At the bottom of the ninth, the TV cameras focused on my face, and you can clearly read my lips. A non-athlete fan, non-athlete fan, screamed, let's go after Chris Taylor got a walk.
Starting point is 00:24:57 I immediately got texts from friends at home watching the game making fun of me for what I had said. Wow. That's crazy. We need to see him yeah i'd love to be able to find that i know see if he uh if paul if you listen to this see if you can get that if you see if i wonder if he has the clip i have all the games archived on mlb tv i can go in and find that later oh yeah awesome yeah right after a walk that's funny yeah and i've noticed
Starting point is 00:25:23 there is there's an increase there's a real backlash to let's go now it's building i feel like you were ahead of the game on yes and uh i love it you've seen it after i'm seeing it everywhere now people are talking about it's an epidemic oh really of of saying let's go yeah yeah you see this guy got shamed for it and shame drives progress yeah it always has it always has. It always has. Mm-hmm. I wish you'd have seen him on the Jumbotron while you were at the game. You're like, look at this idiot.
Starting point is 00:25:51 It's like George Costanza. After a walk. After a walk. Did it walk in a run? Was it a big walk? Yeah, it was ninth inning. Okay. And then they had a walk-off home run.
Starting point is 00:25:59 Okay. Yeah. It was an enormous walk. Okay. I think you said let's go. No. What's bad is you go, because I think you said let's go. No. What's bad is you go, because then you're saying let's go. I said let's go on my act because I say, and then let's go to the store.
Starting point is 00:26:13 Like I'm saying let's go as the actual way you say it. Yeah. And then it just feels anytime you say it anywhere, you're like, I caught myself this weekend. And then I'm like, and I have that. As I'm telling this joke, I have in my head, well, that's not the same let's go everybody else has said. Like all that pops in my head.
Starting point is 00:26:31 It's no fun. Joe Jaroslaw. Jaroslaw. J-A-R-O-Slaw. Jaroslaw. It's a crazy last name for just to be. A-R-O-Slaw. Jar-O-Slaw. It's a crazy last name for just to be. Maybe that's why they went with Joe.
Starting point is 00:26:52 Yeah, we can't give them two crazy names. Maybe his parents are the most reasonable people on earth. She's like, what about naming them something crazy? I can't even think of a crazy. Clyde. Clyde Jar-de Jaroslaw? Well, but I'm saying like a hard, you know, if it's. If you've got a complicated last name,
Starting point is 00:27:12 you can't stick them with a complicated first name too. Yeah. Well, like you. You've got Nate. Nice and simple. Yeah, like Nathaniel. Nathaniel Jaroslaw. They went Nathaniel Bargetti. Yeah, that's what I mean.
Starting point is 00:27:21 You have a hard last name. And we went with Nate. Nice, simple first name. Yeah. Yeah. I mow my lawn every five to six days up here in alaska not every other day well you should probably take better care of your lawn there yeah well he was mowing lawn every five to six days but that's more isn't that more regularly than down here uh depends on time of year yeah yeah right now it's hot, you could probably go two weeks. So maybe not every other day,
Starting point is 00:27:48 but I'm guessing you get more sunlight. You're going to have to mow the grass more regularly. It's not enough to be like if you weren't going to move there, that couldn't be one of your reasons. You're not mowing the grass that much. Like you would be,
Starting point is 00:28:04 you would probably, that'd probably be like, well, I don't want to move there because I don't want to mow the grass that much. Like you would be, you would probably, that'd probably be like, well, I don't want to move there because I don't want to mow the grass every day. And they go, well, that's not really happening. So you need to find some other stuff. And you go, all right, well, the sun's out all the time. And then it disappears. That's why Russia sold it so cheap. I'm tired of mowing the yard.
Starting point is 00:28:19 I'm tired of mowing the lawn every other day. Just take it. All right, cut it they just they go we sold it what's that we sold the the whole shebang all of this all of it we're out of here they pack their stuff pack it up boys drive to the boat get their car on it where are we now we're russians now we're going back we're going to r Russia. Okay. And now they live in Russia. I like to picture a full-on cul-de-sac. Full-on working neighborhoods. Get out of here.
Starting point is 00:28:52 Burn. Hey, we just sold the whole thing. But it's my house. You can't sell my house. The country. State. All of it. Gone. Let's pack it up. The country, state, all of it, gone.
Starting point is 00:29:07 Let's pack it up. Jess F. Hello, folks. As a Rhode Islander, I never got to wonder how many of my state would fit into a place because no one ever seems to fail to include that information in a story. For example, the news has informed me that the biggest fire in Oregon, Washington, the third the size of Rhode Island. Oregon was. Oregon was.
Starting point is 00:29:32 Wise was. I love that it's in all caps. He just ignored it. He's emphasizing that Oregon was. Oregon was. Oregon was. well was is in caps that that's how you do a state right the city of oregon is there an oregon washington there might be i hope there is i hope i need there to be an organ there's gonna say is there an oregon Washington? There's a Washington County in Oregon.
Starting point is 00:30:06 That's what you meant. That's what you meant. There you go. That's what I meant. Oh, man. For example, the news has informed me that the biggest fire in Oregon was a third the size of Rhode Island. I was about to say that sentence didn't make sense when I said it.
Starting point is 00:30:26 I kept going, though. But it's now more than half the size of Rhode Island. And whenever a piece of ice breaks off some glacier, it's always bigger than the state of Rhode Island. Whatever. Yeah, that would be frustrating. It's fun to compare it to a state. I understand why they do that.
Starting point is 00:30:43 Yeah, because you go, wow, that is big. But it is. But if you're Rhode Island, you're like, all right, back off. Right? I guess. But don't they lean in to be in the smallest state? It kind of comes with the territory. You're going to be used as a frame of reference for size you know yeah but do they do it i don't know if you no one really advertises
Starting point is 00:31:11 if you're the smallest something you mean the people themselves yeah they go i'm from rhode island so they're not going around introducing themselves how you doing hi i'm jess f yeah i'm from the smallest state in the country i know i I'm a pretty big guy, but come in a pretty small package, Rhode Island. Chase Schubert. When I used to teach U.S. history, I would throw this trivia fact out there, and it never failed to blow the kids' minds. Where is the most eastern point of the United States? Most answers are usually Florida, Maineine u.s. u.s.
Starting point is 00:31:47 virgin islands or some random point of massachusetts the correct answer is actually alaska uh y'all are pretty quick to write them off but they stretch so far west that they actually cross into the eastern hemisphere, making Simisopochno Island the most eastern point to the U.S. I mean, you say that. Yeah, that's a tough one. How would you say it? Simisopochno. Sophanoi.
Starting point is 00:32:21 Sophanoi. There's a P in there. Simisopochnoi. Yeah, Simisopochnoi. There you go. That looks goodi. There's a P in there. Semi-Sopaknoi. Yeah. Semi-Sopaknoi. There you go. There you go. That looks good.
Starting point is 00:32:27 Semi-Sopaknoi Island. It's probably Sopaknoi. The most eastern point of the U.S. Yeah, look. Technically, it is east, but come on. It's to the left. It's a fun fact, though. He said the one person, student who got it right, was a dyslexic kid.
Starting point is 00:32:43 Oh, yeah. And he had it backwards. Oh, yeah. He thought he was just picking the right yeah he's like i don't know how y'all are not getting this but why wouldn't hawaii isn't it further no you can see right here oh okay that's why yeah alaska's extends further out than hawaii pretty crazy huh that's a fun that's a fun uh you know you know like hey what state do you think is closest to africa if you had to guess what state do i think is closest to the continent of africa florida yeah that's what i would have guessed too i'll say i'll say maine california california well
Starting point is 00:33:23 i mean we're going opposite of Alaska. Yeah, I guess you're right. Is it Alaska? Maine. Maine. That's what I said. Yeah. Oh, because it goes up.
Starting point is 00:33:32 You never think it goes out that far. That sounds good of a question. Sounds good of a fact, I guess. We need a globe. Yeah, is it Maine? I don't know if it's even Maine. That's Maine. Yeah, there's Maine. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:33:42 Oh, yeah, it goes there. And there's Africa. Yeah. Oh, yeah. And there's Africa. Yeah. I mean, yeah, that's why I thought Alaska would have been it. Or California, like the way you asked. I mean, we just talked about the Alaska thing, which is insane. And Maine is like, oh, that makes sense. I wasn't trying to what up the fact.
Starting point is 00:34:00 I know, but your question is, he goes Alaska. That's insane, that Alaska. Like, right? Yeah. That's insane, that Alaska. Like, right? Yeah. No one's getting that. And then in Maine, you're like, maybe 50-50 people get it? I don't think so. I think very few people would get that.
Starting point is 00:34:14 They would think Florida. I think they think it's too far north, and I don't think they realize how east it is. I think they think Florida. I think it makes sense if they think about it at all. If they're looking at a map. Yeah. When you look at it, you'll feel stupid. That's what I'm Florida. I think it makes sense if they think about it at all. If they're looking at a map. Yeah. When you look at it, you feel stupid. That's what I'm saying.
Starting point is 00:34:29 After you say Florida, I'm looking at it, I go, I feel dumb. I mean, New York is even closer than Delaware. North Carolina is closer than Florida. Yeah. I guess the closest is Maine. I guess so. That's a great fact. That guy comes in with the Alaska fact, and you do.
Starting point is 00:34:48 You better hope you do yours first, and then he comes in with Alaska. Yeah, that went backwards. I couldn't follow that one. Yeah, that'd be tough. You don't want to follow that. I got buried. Oh. What do you think is closest to Africa?
Starting point is 00:35:00 Are you like me? I would go Alaska or California. I'm like, well, I guess it's. A trick trick question it's got to be more spectacular than that yeah you got no uh delaware okay cool man that's cool man oh because it goes okay that's all they're gonna oh because it's like oh oh yeah oh yeah and, yeah. And then you got to go, no, look. And you pull out the map on your phone. Everybody's got to sit there. And you go, look, it's got to be. And the Alaska guy's already off to a different party.
Starting point is 00:35:34 And they go, where is he? Just spouting awesome facts. Like everybody's playing a big trivia game, you know. And then you're just sitting there trying to. I keep asking people the same question. You're trying to keep up with him. And he's sitting there like, what's it like? You just name and trick questions, you know, it's the highest balloon size.
Starting point is 00:35:56 If someone's ever held onto balloons and been in the air, how can, do you know if a squirrel, if you throw it out of airplane, it can survive and useless. And you're and you're just trying to do one of them. You know, we only eat 10 elephants in our whole life. All right, all right. They go, Aaron, could we get you out of here? No, but does everybody understand what I'm saying? Like, you only eat 10 worths of elephants.
Starting point is 00:36:21 How many would you have thought? How many would you have thought you'd eat? A million? Yeah, exactly. A million elephants. Three. Two of them got away. worths of elephants how many would you thought how many would you thought you eat a million yeah exactly three two of them got away james bond fire alaska is the only state that can be typed by using one row on the keyboard all right i know you and james and aaron will be at the same party trying to follow chase that's a cool fact yeah now have you ever i think you say your fact and then james says that james is in the middle where they go james jane that's
Starting point is 00:36:55 that fact is after the chases they go well i don't know that he goes you know it's only state typed using one row on the keyboard yeah that's if you use the qwerty keyboard that's what everybody uses that's the line from the office you just hit ctrl p that's print not if the printer isn't plugged in you're making some dangerous assumptions so i think about this have you looked into any of these alternate keyboard layouts i didn't know that existed there are other ways you can lay out the keys for the keyboard this is uh i don't know that exist no there there are other ways you can lay out the keys for the keyboard this is uh i don't know how to pronounce it but devorak vorak layout yeah and they said if you're really proficient at this you can type like 75 faster just because the math of where the keys
Starting point is 00:37:42 are laid out it's much more efficient that way. But we're all used to this one. Isn't that crazy? Yeah. I thought about trying to use that years ago, but I think it's too late. Do they still teach typing in high school? I'm sure they do. You still need it, right? You still gotta type. Yeah, but you just grow up doing it.
Starting point is 00:38:00 You know what I mean? I'm sure they do. You teach yourself as a kid? Yeah. Harper types on You know she does that You just come up with it right? It's just intuitive I bet you teach The proper form
Starting point is 00:38:15 The proper way you're supposed to Early on though That's not a high school class anymore Yeah It was junior high for me I think I took it in college Yeah well that's what they just had Typewriters invented
Starting point is 00:38:25 Couldn't believe they had them Aaron and I just talked about this Because he was trying to help me Learn some stuff The fact that I said computer stuff He just looked at me like This guy Yeah
Starting point is 00:38:38 Does not know what he's talking about What would you say How would you say You go Can you do some I mean he was showing me Some specific Specific video editing stuff And I'm like Man you know a lot about This do some i mean he was showing me some specific specific video
Starting point is 00:38:45 editing stuff and i'm like man you know a lot about this computer stuff yeah he just looked at me like oh god this is gonna be worse than i thought i showed him control s we'll save it oh he's like yeah i don't ever do the control do the shortcuts it'll change your life dude i know i don't ever remember yeah like i don't ever people them. Yeah. Like, I don't ever. People always. You know what I do? Copy and paste. You copy and paste. Paste, which is V. Yeah. And then that's the only one I do. The other one I don't.
Starting point is 00:39:11 I don't ever know what they are. You don't save? That's like, what do I quit? Control Q? No, I just, I go to the top with the mouse, the old-fashioned way. I see my mouse. My mouse walks and gets in the car, and I got to watch him start it. And then he's going.
Starting point is 00:39:28 He holds out. He goes, hold on. And then I watch him drive to the top of the screen. He has to stop and get gas. And we sit there and wait, and he goes. We talk for a minute, and then he gets back in the car, backs out, gets to the top, and then he presses it and that's what mine that's what i do uh katie bork nate mentioned how much he loved uh medea made me think that he and my dad
Starting point is 00:39:57 would get along so well the first time i introduced him to my girlfriend he spent 30 minutes explaining how great a hallmark movie he recently saw was. My girlfriend was floored by how passionate he was about explaining it. All I could say was that my dad is a simple guy. Man, you know what? I think we would. Did you say Katie?
Starting point is 00:40:18 Cody. Maybe I did say Katie. Cody. Cody Bork. Yeah. That's just all I am. I'm a simple guy yeah i like uh you catch you you know everybody's got to have a movie though that like it uh like a guilty pleasure it's not guilty pleasure it's just it catches you at the right time that you're like dude this was great yeah so it's it's not a guilty pleasure Pleasure is your, is, you know, is a movie that I would say you would go back and watch, right?
Starting point is 00:40:49 Or like a show. That would be more of a, I feel like a show. Something you're embarrassed to indulge in. Yeah, like if you're like in Seinfeld with Melrose Place. That was like, that's like a Guilty Pleasure,
Starting point is 00:40:58 but you're like watching the whole show. Yeah. But I mean, you don't have a movie that you're like, man, I know no one likes that movie, but I just, like first Fantastic Four is always, I say for me, the first one. Yeah. Because I was on a cruise ship and I was alone and they just kept replaying it.
Starting point is 00:41:11 And then I was like, I think this movie's great. And I talk about these superhero movies, I make fun of these superhero movies, but that's the one everybody hates the most. And for some reason, I'm just in a ship and just like rocking and they just kept playing it. You're bombing real bad on that ship yeah and then you go home and guess who's their fantastic four so you don't have a movie like that oh i probably got a ton i just watched uh my wife was watching clueless on tbs or something
Starting point is 00:41:36 and i watched it with her and it's i thought it was really funny yeah i mean i've seen it before but yeah it's not bad watched Watched Legally Blonde recently. Yeah, I have actually. It's a great movie. Yeah, there you go. Well, speaking of eating well, we have people that have to eat well all the time. And I want to say...
Starting point is 00:41:59 That's a good segue. That was a terrible segue. No, we have people that have to eat good all the time. For our topic? For our topic. Yeah, I understand it. I want to say that. What a reach.
Starting point is 00:42:14 How's that a reach? We're going to talk about the Olympics. That's people in the Olympics. The number one thing Olympic athletes are known for. Eating healthy all the time. Subway. They do Green Chef. Green Chef sponsors the entire Olympics.
Starting point is 00:42:30 Look, I'm not saying I could have come up with a better segue, but it was hilarious. You were just going to slide that past. I thought it was the greatest segue of all time. Before we get into it, I did some research on that Tom Brady video. Turns out it is real. It's 100% authentic. Oh, really?
Starting point is 00:42:48 No. We got so many emails from people who's like, you idiots. I just wanted to blow their mind by saying, it's real, folks. Just keep going. Well, folks, let's go because it was all real. I bet you could. I wonder if it can be done. They said no.
Starting point is 00:43:04 They said the wheels were spinning so fast It would immediately Just shut it right back Yeah If anybody could do it It was the guy That did it in the video Yeah
Starting point is 00:43:11 Yeah He probably eats real healthy too He does eat healthy Yeah Great segment You want to do the green shift Nate want to Yeah
Starting point is 00:43:20 Helix Speaking of people That get good night's sleep People that eat healthy The Olympics Yeah That would be That would not be a bad Yeah, Helix. Speaking of people that get good night's sleep. People that eat healthy. The Olympics. That would not be a bad segue into it. People that sleep, that need the most sleep,
Starting point is 00:43:35 they've been sleeping on cardboard beds. You know who's been doing that? The Olympic athletes, which is what we're talking about today. That's how you get in. That's a segue. Okay. Some of them have cardboard beds. What do you mean? Their beds are made out of cardboard at the the like the bottom of it maybe even i don't know the
Starting point is 00:43:49 mattresses in the olympic village yeah because there's supposedly no hookup kind of bed like supposedly that's what someone says but the yeah because they just had to put like i mean you know depending on the athlete that you are some of them have actually hotel rooms and some of them are like in dorm rooms and rooms and so they they have to just make the bed i think depending on your sport if you're you know the gymnast or the the swimmers the the ones we're all watching i think they're in hotel rooms and then if you're like i don't know just some country you know that's just, and you're doing not even a big sport. Someone, you know, it's like the curling of, I don't know, I can't think of a country.
Starting point is 00:44:35 Yeah. If you were in the FBI and they said, we got to investigate some crime, we got to infiltrate the Olympics, you have to go as an Olympic athlete and blend in. What sport could you best blend in? How much do we have time to prepare for this? Or is this like tomorrow? Tomorrow. You've got to go.
Starting point is 00:44:53 And you've got to pretend like you're this athlete. Do we actually have to perform? You've got to do the sport, yeah. Okay. Man. I hate to throw them under the bus. I saw a picture of the curling team. Yeah. And they just look like normal dudes yeah you know yeah you got to do the sport yeah i mean that's what i was
Starting point is 00:45:13 gonna say i could sweep yeah you could do the sweeping yeah some sweeping i think they'd be like this guy's not good you know yeah but but they wouldn't think this guy's from like what's your best sport you think you could do? Well, yours is golf probably. Yeah. You think you could hang? Well, no, but I'm saying. With them, I mean, one guy shot nine over in one country. I mean, obviously that guy's still light years better than me.
Starting point is 00:45:40 But, I mean, you just go in and be like, yeah, I just had a really bad round. Uh-huh. You know? Yeah. I mean, if I go shoot an 80, if I can shoot an 80, I mean, you just go in and be like, yeah, I just had a really bad round, you know? Yeah. I mean, if I go shoot an 80, if I can shoot an 80, I mean, from all the way back there, 80, I bet, I bet. I mean, I think I break 90 and like, then, yeah. So it's like, you're just not talking about it.
Starting point is 00:45:56 You have the best route of your life and you have to go there. Yeah. It was just an off day. Oh yeah. I mean, you shoot 78 on a Olympic course and then have to just be like, I am thrilled. Like after they go, what happened out there? And you go, everything great happened.
Starting point is 00:46:12 Yeah, the best round of my life. I don't know. The best. I broke 80 at the Olympics. But if you had to say they gave you gymnastics, 100 meter, or swimming, which one are you going to choose? Between those three? Those are the three.
Starting point is 00:46:29 For the movie I'm making that you're starring in. What's the – I don't think they'd let me in to watch any of those events. I feel like swimming or – This guy in lane seven refused to take his shirt off. I think that's going to take his shirt off uh i think that's gonna i think that's gonna hurt his time i don't want to say for sure but i'm pretty sure the drag as you notice everybody has he still has the thing over his head as if that's going to help but he's got a
Starting point is 00:46:58 print you know he's wearing a uh hattie bees's oversized T-shirt to Chicken Place in Nashville. It's very good. They have a long line. Always a long line. Lane 9. They asked them to put him in Lane 9. He's actually switching with Lane 7 because they thought he'd be a distraction. What's that?
Starting point is 00:47:19 He's asking if he can start in the pool. He just wants to know if he can. Neck up. Can he just wants to know if he can neck up can he just what's the difference if i can hear i'm reading his lips right he's going i don't understand what the difference is i could be the chart where i want to start that's the argument he's making that he's teasing i don't know what your problem is i gotta'm wearing a t-shirt. Just let me. Are they making, well, they told him that he cannot swim with a t-shirt on, which he then counters with, well, do you mind if I start in the pool?
Starting point is 00:47:54 That's a compromise. That's a compromise. Well, you're making me take my t-shirt off. I don't think that's unfair. So at least let me start in the pool. Yeah. So he climbs in the pool, and now he takes his t-shirt off from inside the pool. There was a guy,
Starting point is 00:48:08 they called him Eric the Eel. I don't remember this, but in 2000, he was from some new developing country that they'd never been in the Olympics. And there was three developed countries that he was from like Ecuador, Guinea or something. He just learned to swim
Starting point is 00:48:24 like eight months earlier. He'd never been in an Olympic-sized pool, and he raced against three other guys. The other two guys jumped in too quickly, so they got disqualified. So he got to do the whole race by himself, and he barely made it because he can barely swim. I thought he was going to drown, but he did the whole thing. It took him like a minute 54 to do it to do what just there and back
Starting point is 00:48:47 yeah but he he won his heat because he was the only one doing it but wow wow it's like this and then he moved on well he's even though he won his heat his time was so slow he still didn't get to yeah to get to go further but uh he only had only learned how to swim eight months before. Can you imagine? Golly. First time in a 50-meter pool. They put the world record up there in case he breaks it. Well, I watched his video.
Starting point is 00:49:15 He does not. By the end. The world record is 48 seconds, and he does it in a minute 54. Yeah. He's doing pretty good. Yeah, he starts off good but yeah his form's not great by the end like it's like i don't think he's gonna make it yeah does he do can you start swimming regular or like can you start doing like breaststroke dog paddling or do you have to stay
Starting point is 00:49:36 in the freestyle form the whole time i think freestyle you just do whatever you want right yeah i think but so you can see slowing down a little bit there by the end he's you're like this guy might drown right here on the spot yeah the turn yeah that was a nice turn that was a good turn and that's yeah i mean that's that is a bless his heart yeah if i've ever seen one and bless his heart doing great i mean that's so crazy it's like you know you don't even think about it 2000 in the year 2000 that the fact that there's a developing country that's like hey by the way the other countries go we do the olympics yeah and all the countries compete do you want to do it and they go yeah i guess so uh we got to find a guy that's that would be the the uh it'd be great if they showed the world record like the line just zoom yeah
Starting point is 00:50:33 he's so tired i mean yeah you know that's a long way it's so long it's so long it's a yeah it's so long yeah and you gotta think he It's a, yeah. It's so long. And you got to think he's the only one that probably agreed to do it. They're like, why don't you do it? He's like, I'm not doing it. He just learned how to swim. Doing pretty good, to be honest. Oh, they got the world record back up.
Starting point is 00:50:56 Yeah. They want to just mess with him now. Did he get it within a minute of the world record? He got it 152.72. Yeah. He's like, dude. He's like, dude. I'm done with it.
Starting point is 00:51:11 Did he? I mean, look, standing over it, I mean, that's how cool is that? Yeah. What happened when he raced against someone else? He didn't get to race against anyone else because his heat, obviously his time wasn't good enough, so he didn't. So even though he won the heat, he didn't qualify for the next. He still won an Olympic heat.
Starting point is 00:51:30 It would have been great to be able to see him against a real. Yeah. The other two guys were real? They were from developing countries also, and they false started twice. Yeah. They just got disqualified, so it was just Eric. God. I mean, it's fun so it's just Eric. God. I mean, it's fun that it's just Eric, but you're like, the other ones,
Starting point is 00:51:49 you were like, can you imagine if you got to watch, like, just three regular dudes race at the Olympics? How great that would be? How, you know, just because it's so, everybody's so good, and they're so at the peak of their of athlete just to see be like that's us out there yeah and then just if you watched the competition of that just being you know this was some i mean this is the worst source ever you only practice in a 12 a 12 meter pool at a hotel he was allowed to use between 5 a.m and 6 a.m he went to the hotel pool
Starting point is 00:52:21 so it was like you've been swimming a lot there. What are you getting ready for? I'm doing the Olympics tomorrow. Yeah, that's crazy, man. That's awesome. Yeah. He had a better swimming body than we've had. Oh, yeah. The guy looked like he was in great shape. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:52:37 See, that's the thing. You asked which event I would do. I couldn't, I mean, I wouldn't be able to finish that. Yeah. I could run 100 meters, not quickly, but I could at least get to the end. Yeah. I would have tapped out halfway through the first part of that, swimming. Would you false start so you didn't have to do it?
Starting point is 00:52:52 Maybe those two guys false started on purpose. Maybe. That's not a bad idea. What if they did do that? And then Eric then now is like, I didn't think of that. I'm not going to do this. Yeah. I should have thought of it.
Starting point is 00:53:07 Yeah. He goes, what are you, idiot? And they go, we're the idiot? Have fun, Eric. When he started, halfway through he goes, yeah. Oh.
Starting point is 00:53:16 Now I get it. I get it. All right. I didn't even think about it. Golly. Why didn't somebody tell me? These didn't come in last. He gets out fierce at his coach.
Starting point is 00:53:34 Why didn't you tell me to false start? It would have been great if no one, too, if he had a race with everybody, like Michael Phelps is next to him, and then they don't tell. Because he looks like he could be a swimmer. Right, right. And then no one says, by because he looks like he could be a swimmer. Right, right. And then no one says, by the way, this one guy just learned how to swim, and he's from a new country. And they don't say that, and then you see him dive in.
Starting point is 00:53:56 I mean, there's got to be, how long does it take before you go, oh, what's wrong with that? You know, I mean, is it the turn? Do they make the turn? That turn did not look good. I mean, he not look good. You got no launch off that turn. They have 1,500 meters. That's Katie Ledecky's big one. That one, you couldn't even finish.
Starting point is 00:54:14 That race is like you have to fast forward. It's like a 20-minute race. Was it that long? Yeah. I don't think I could run. I couldn't run 1,500 meters probably. No, I couldn't either. What is 1,500?
Starting point is 00:54:26 400 is one time? Do you think track and field would be? 12, it's a mile. It's like 1,200 meters is one mile. Yeah. No, 1,600 meters is a mile. It's less than a mile. Yeah, 1,500 is a little less than a mile.
Starting point is 00:54:41 You couldn't run a mile? I mean, it wouldn't be pretty. Well, I'm not saying it's not. Yeah, not. I mean, it wouldn't be pretty. Well, I'm not saying it's not. Yeah, I don't think you running 100 meters is pretty. I mean, I'm talking about beauty at this. You know, no one just looks at you and goes, it's beautiful. It's beautiful.
Starting point is 00:55:01 It's beautiful. You sitting there. Beautiful. I think I'd be more impressed with these olympic runners if i knew the metric system like i think in the u.s we always hear he did a 9.8 seconds 100 meter or whatever yeah like i have no idea about 100 yards i would have some kind of reference yeah yeah i don't even know how 100 meters is what's is that in yards i i don't think i think of it you think a meter is about a yard that's probably like he was saying boat i always think wonder what he'd run the 40 in
Starting point is 00:55:29 yeah the 40 yard i mean i'm probably under four no he ran it i think he said because they've been talking about that he said he ran it i think in 422 and he goes i did it in uh with uh jeans and something on because uh what's his face with the Chiefs wants to race him in the 40. Tyree Keel. Tyree Keel. But, yeah. So Tyree Keel said he could do it. See him.
Starting point is 00:55:55 He said he could beat him in the 40 yards. But if you watch Usain Bolt. Yeah, so Deion Sanders supposedly ran a 3.9. That would be crazy. But if you watched him, Usain Bolt when he raced he was never super fast so that's why Terry Gill I guess could probably beat him in the 40 yard dash like he starts Usain like doesn't start fast I mean he's obviously starting very fast but he starts and then he just like hits another thing so 40 would be too short for him to fully yeah it'd be like yeah that's what that's what you know which he's starting very fast. But he starts, and then he just hits another thing. So 40 would be too short for him to fully –
Starting point is 00:56:26 Yeah, it'd be like – yeah, that's what – which he's trying to call him out now to be like, I'll take him 40 yards. But it's kind of just like, who cares? Who cares? And entire kills, yeah. What is he – how old is Usain Bolt? He's old. Yeah, he's old. he's old he's washed up that's what he said yeah it's in his 30s now i think well yeah 34 i'm not that old man dude
Starting point is 00:56:54 yeah ancient for that it is yeah but yeah do you um so the olympic rings, that represents the five continents that participate in the Olympics. And I guess those five colors represent part of the flag of every country that participates. Oh, okay. So if you have a flag that's not one of those colors, they don't let you in? I mean, I think so far it's worked. Yeah. So far they got a little. Nobody from Antarctica has made it so far.
Starting point is 00:57:26 What is Antarctica's flag? Do they have a flag? I don't know. White. Snow. It's just. It blends in. No one can ever see it.
Starting point is 00:57:39 They do have a flag. That's kind of a cool flag, I guess. That's a real cool flag. Yeah, I like that. Say Antarctica couldn't be in. Well, I mean, they could if there's someone who lived there that wasn't a scientist.
Starting point is 00:57:56 Opening ceremonies, it always starts with the Greeks. Oh, really? That's where it started. It was in Greece. So it always starts with the Greeks And ends with the host team And then all other countries Go in alphabetical order
Starting point is 00:58:09 As labeled by the host country's language Oh That's fun Yeah It's at least different That person at least has a job Whoever decides that Like you know
Starting point is 00:58:22 To put them in order? Yeah Like they're at least It's not like They can just phone it in. Right. It's actually work. There's a real process there. There's a real process.
Starting point is 00:58:32 What if you're in Greece? Which it was just not too many Olympics ago. So I guess, I don't know if they came out first and circled back around, did it again, or what? I'm sure they just went last. Every two years, the Olympic flame is lit in Greece before going to the host nation. And the host nation displays it around the country
Starting point is 00:58:54 before it's used to light the Olympic cauldron. They run it. How do they get it to these other countries? So it's lit in... In Greece. And they fly it? Yeah, I guess so. And it's kept going the whole time? I don't know if they keep it lit on a plane i don't think they don't they just run it from town to town
Starting point is 00:59:11 yes but you gotta get to the ocean you get the ocean you go from greece to tokyo you brought it you get to the water hold it forrest gump just, you know what? Silly me. Oh, shit. One of the worst. Oh, shit. It says it like Newman. Yeah. Oh, shit.
Starting point is 00:59:32 Skin cancer. Skin, yeah. One of the worst movies I've ever seen was Superman 3. Yeah. The one with, I'm going to draw a blank on, Richard Pryor. But Superman. a bad guy, and he just lets himself go and starts drinking and stops shaving. That sounds awesome.
Starting point is 00:59:55 And he goes to the Olympic Open ceremonies, and as soon as they light the cauldron, he just goes and blows it out. Oh, that sounds great. That's about the only scene In that movie I remember Superman blowing out The Olympic flame And everybody just looks around
Starting point is 01:00:11 Like oh gosh Yeah What do we do But yeah Once it gets into the host country Then you just run it Because I've been I've been a lot of places
Starting point is 01:00:18 Like you know The Olympic torch Came through this town Came through this city Years and years ago Somebody ran it through Do people ask If like Superman, could he get drunk? That's a good question.
Starting point is 01:00:31 That's an interesting question. This was in 19... The Christopher Reeve version could. Yeah. I don't think the modern one now would. Would they even be affected? Superman has no alcohol tolerance. But that says
Starting point is 01:00:48 Clark Kent is a lightweight when it comes to holding his booze. Yeah. It looks like people... This is a fierce debate going on among fans. Probably has to drink a lot. Captain America gets drunk
Starting point is 01:01:03 at some point, I guess. Well, Thor was in The Avengers. Here we go. In Richard Lester's horrible 1983 mess, Superman 3, a counterfeit kryptonite-infected Superman. Oh, so he's already infected by kryptonite. That's what enables him to get drunk. Okay.
Starting point is 01:01:22 He drank a lot of liquor in a bar. Johnny Walker, Red Label Scotch. then it was just a mean drunk to people well yeah he flew flew out there flipped mcflane yeah he's still got some of the superpowers yeah he can still do stuff that's like uh shack dunking now where it's like he's 50 and it's like and he's so dunk he's like i'm all right i can get up there like that's him blowing it out superman's like he's 50 and it's like and he's so dunk he's like i'm i can get up there like that's him blowing it out superman's like i can still do some stuff i know i'm not on all cylinders right here but don't yeah um there were four new sports added this year to the olympics yeah surfing sport climbing karate and skateboarding and then some sports come back depending on if it's popular in the host country,
Starting point is 01:02:07 which I didn't know that. Like this year, baseball and softball are returning because it's in Japan. Oh. But it's not going to be in the next Olympics. Really? Yeah. Where's the next Olympics at? Paris.
Starting point is 01:02:19 The next Summer Olympics. Oh, boy. What are they doing in Paris? Well, I'm glad you asked, Aaron. Smoking cigarettes. Cigarettes, eating bread. Let me skip ahead. What are they doing in Paris? Well, I'm glad you asked, Aaron. Smoking cigarettes. Cigarettes, eating bread. Let me skip ahead to what they're doing in Paris. Break dancing is going to be one of the newest things.
Starting point is 01:02:33 Oh, really? That's a sport, dude. Well, I don't know. Start practicing now. That could be your event. Yeah. That could be the one. You walk out and just, you'd be a robot.
Starting point is 01:02:46 Just boop, boop, boop, boop, boop. Hello? I'd be the Eric the Eel of breakdancing. Is he from a developing country? No, America. The United States. But he's from Alabama. They go, oh.
Starting point is 01:03:03 From a developing state. Yeah, everybody goes oh oh yeah he trained on vanilla ice yeah bless his heart look at him and then everybody clapped yeah you just you do your only dance is the thing that looks like you're waiting to get in the middle like it's just that and you're like how is he gonna go in and he goes you guys go ahead i'm just still i don't haven't hit the right i'm still waiting to feel the right moment to it doesn't feel right and then you got to do an interview what happened why don't you get in there because it never it never felt right i kept waiting for the beat to drop and i don't think
Starting point is 01:03:39 it dropped the way i thought you knew the way we practiced it to drop and they go huh and he goes yeah and then i then i was just then i missed my turn you're disqualified yeah you know yeah didn't get a score so the ancient olympics started in bronx you know the new york popped in and this is you trying to get and he obviously crushed it um so just that's like we had a state break dancing yeah alabama and obviously new york came in albany you know albama we albana would be a pretty low seed i feel like yeah yeah new york be number one new york california yeah um the olympics started in ancient greece you should do that by the way Instead of the Olympics What?
Starting point is 01:04:26 State Olympics? There should be state Olympics Yeah Yeah Wouldn't that be fun? Yeah That would be great Yeah
Starting point is 01:04:34 We should start that We should start it Starts here Starting now It started 8th century BC Yeah And went to 4th century AD So during the time of Christ
Starting point is 01:04:47 The Olympics were going on That's kind of crazy The Israeli team approached him You're 30, I know that's kind of old for gymnasts But we've seen what you've done on that water We think we could use you here You're Unbelievable
Starting point is 01:05:01 You're doing some stuff We've seen it um but they um they started originally to honor the i don't think he could get in under the water jesus to swim oh the swim he just runs on top of that freestyle yeah he can do freestyle right he just runs across it he just runs across it and he goes is he gets freestyles like i can do whatever i want right yeah that's what he gets that's the name of it i don't i'm confused the name of his freestyle do whatever you want yeah but jesus you have to swim but you're not even wet you didn't take your shoes off there you go that's ridiculous and eric's just behind him There you go.
Starting point is 01:05:41 That's ridiculous. And Eric just behind him. He's just not even looking. He just moved Eric forward a little bit. Jesus, take the wheel. The first written record of Olympic Games, the first event was won by a cook named Corbus. He ran the 192-meter foot race called the Stade,
Starting point is 01:06:08 which is where stadium comes from. So he's the first Olympic champion. A cook. He ran the what? Stage? It's called the Stade, S-T-A-D-E, and the word stadium comes from this Greek word for foot race. Weren't they all naked?
Starting point is 01:06:25 They did run naked because they said their garments started hindering them on their times. Because they didn't have under armor back then. I don't think it was right out of the gate, but one guy won a race naked and they were like, oh, this guy's onto something. He kind of changed the game. Some guy shows up. He was freer. Hey, where's your tunic at, man? Nah, I'm going to run
Starting point is 01:06:41 this one naked. I'm going to run this one no clothes on. That's cool man uh they did that i'm watching chernobyl yeah yeah uh what do they do max uh do you finish a lot of shows or do you just start shows and then no no chernobyl i will finish okay uh it's great west wing I mean I think I did the first episode and it just hasn't caught me right again
Starting point is 01:07:07 but I gotta I gotta get you know I gotta get caught I'm just not in the I get it so I'm watching Chernobyl and then
Starting point is 01:07:15 my wave one the 100 foot big wave and then but Chernobyl they the miners they used to go
Starting point is 01:07:23 they had them digging and they did they did it naked. Why was that? Because it was so hot. It's the way their dads. The guy just says it in the movie, but he goes, it's the way our fathers did it. Wow.
Starting point is 01:07:34 And it would be so hot down there, and the clothes would get so hot. So they used to do it with no clothes on. Wow. Yeah. They originally did not give out medals. That's a segue back into... Yeah. Let's see.
Starting point is 01:07:48 Speaking of people who get hot doing stuff. Chernobyl. The whole city of Chernobyl. They originally did not give medals. They gave olive wreaths that you put on your head. And then it goes bad. And then you... Yeah. And then they go, where's your olive wreath? It's over there.
Starting point is 01:08:08 Didn't you come in first place? It's already gone. It just died like a bouquet of flowers. Yeah. When the Roman Empire conquered Greece, they said the Olympic standards went down drastically in quality. Emperor Nero entered a chariot race and fell off his chariot, but still declared himself the winner.
Starting point is 01:08:26 Yeah, that's great. Nope, nope. Start over. Start over. When they put that speed gun up outside Dunder Mifflin and Michael Scott. Run.
Starting point is 01:08:40 He gets 32. And they cannot think the car is done. That's not humanly possible Beat it Beat it I won And then they finally Roman Emperor
Starting point is 01:08:55 Ended the Olympics Because He was Christian And he said That's a pagan festival So he stopped it I agree And
Starting point is 01:09:02 It was 1500 years Before it started back up Wow Took that long it's a long time just think about like 1500 years from now yeah and just think they went to olympics where they go i guess the olympics are over and then you're like eventually it just comes back and it's normal and no one even knows that they were never not there after those people that were in those 1500 years there's people that were alive those 1,500 years, those people that were alive,
Starting point is 01:09:25 they probably didn't even know the Olympics were even a thing. Yeah. And it was never within 700, 800 years of ever even getting a chance to see it. Right. And now I wouldn't even know that they stopped the Olympics. I didn't know that either.
Starting point is 01:09:41 So what's something that's about to end now that 1,500 years from now they'll pick back up? I mean, I can't know that either. So what's something that's about to end now that 1,500 years from now they'll pick back up? I mean, I can't think of anything. Yeah. Cosby Show. Not many. I don't know. The year 3500, they're going to start rebooting Cosby Show.
Starting point is 01:10:03 This is funny. Why is this taking so long? So then the Modern Olympics started in 1896. Still in Greece and Athens. They have clothes on at this point. Yep. 280 participants from 12 countries. 43 events. That's pretty good. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:10:21 For 1896. Was America in it at this point yep i mean how do these other countries even hear about it that's a that's a good question how you coordinate something like this yeah how do you and tell them when exactly to show up and do these things hey we're doing this you get it and he goes like because he had the guy like the guy gets a letter and he's like all right because there's olymp, I guess it's all countries. And it was basically- Yeah, he's like, when is it? Tomorrow.
Starting point is 01:10:49 I got to be in Africa tomorrow. Like, when did you send this? And he goes, you want me to be in Africa tomorrow? That's what this guy- Give me a break. Well, you remember from the calendar episode, Russia missed the start of the Olympics because they weren't on the Gregorian calendar. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:11:03 They were still on the old calendar, so they got their got their dates off yeah but it was basically one guy kind of started it all back himself he was like a french guy he went to athens he's like you know what this be cool to start doing this again and he kind of just got it going he went to athens and like saw like right about in the history book yeah something about that point and thought this would be kind of cool to do this again well that, that's the part that, but yeah, how do they get the information to the other countries? I mean, I guess you can mail it on ships and stuff. Got to do it way ahead of time. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:11:33 You'd have to be like, hey, we're going to be. And then. By 1896, they had some forms of communication. And telegrams. Yeah. But then you got to send the thing. I know, but how do you give it to Everybody in the country How do you get all the countries to come
Starting point is 01:11:46 I guess you gotta get it to the main country Twelve Yeah twelve Get it to the president of that country And then they disperse it To the people who need to know I guess Yeah But I
Starting point is 01:11:57 You gotta think that first day They're like This is a mixer Maybe nobody's gonna show up Yeah Where you from buddy Here's your name tag Yeah Welcome We got drinks over here If you need anything Like, this is a mixer. Maybe nobody's going to show up. Yeah. Ah, where are you from, buddy? Here's your name tag. Yeah, there you go.
Starting point is 01:12:05 Welcome. We got drinks over here. If you need anything. Let us know. Let us know. We're just happy you're here. And it's Eric the Ill. Like, what?
Starting point is 01:12:14 Yeah. My country's been around for 30 minutes. So now we're going to jump ahead To stuff I remember Yeah Well first of all I don't remember Jump ahead a couple years
Starting point is 01:12:29 I don't remember this They started giving medals For gold, silver, and bronze In 1904 That part I don't remember Yeah But I do remember When the Summer Olympics
Starting point is 01:12:37 And Winter Olympics Stopped becoming the same year Oh they used to do it All at once Yep Up till 1994 That recently? Yep Oh man I used to do it all at once? Yep. Yeah. Up until 1994. That recently?
Starting point is 01:12:46 Yep. Oh, man. I mean, they're like six months apart, but it was always the same year. But then they started splitting them every two years. Oh, they were still separate events. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was just the same year. One Olympics. It was the same year.
Starting point is 01:13:01 I feel like it made it feel like a bigger deal because it was like truly once every four years yeah yeah yeah and then so it was like wall-to-wall coverage where now you're always like you know really the only summer olympics is the only one that people really even care about especially here you think up north maybe they're going to it uh yeah but i mean it's like skiing like you know you watch like the skiing they have they have like lindsey vaughn figure skating it's always big sean white shot figure skating stars yeah yeah sean white but sean white i think it was like recent right the snowboard snowboarding wasn't always like they're kind of doing like an x game kind of thing sean white yes i watched sean white uh yeah figure skating tanya harding
Starting point is 01:13:45 it's carrigan obviously was in figure skating is big but that's do we have a big star in that now i mean usually every year it's someone i've never heard of until the olympics michelle kwan remember her i didn't remember her she was supposed to be win gold one year and got upset yeah she got mad she you said it she got upset and laughed yeah that's what you see yeah yeah she got real annoyed she got yeah sean white in 2010 olympics in vancouver did the first double mctwist 1260 which he called the tomahawk it was a move nobody had ever seen or done before and and he won the gold yeah it was the i guess toughest move in snowboarding double mctwist 1260 just the name alone sounds pretty is a lot there's a lot yeah
Starting point is 01:14:35 uh michael phelps is the most decorated olympian he won eight gold medals in 20 2008 olympics i think that was my favorite olympics and I've been through a few. Yeah. That was when he was dominating, and that's when Usain Bolt was dominating. Yeah. Yeah, it was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. Well, that's like the 100 meter is such a –
Starting point is 01:14:57 is such a – like I watched it last night. They did the 100 meters last night. I watched it last night. They did the 100 meters last night. And without a Usain Bolt, it's up there. This guy from Italy won. Yeah, Italian. Italian.
Starting point is 01:15:14 And they've never won. You and I watch PTI, and Tony Kornheiser, who's been doing it for 40-something years, says the 100 meters is the most exciting sporting event he covers in person. Yeah. Because it's just – I just don't believe that. It's just so quick. I believe he said that.
Starting point is 01:15:30 I'm not doubting you. You're calling me a liar, Aaron? Yeah. I'm saying I just – I mean, that guy's Super Bowls and World Series and NBA final, the 100-meter dash. It's just because I think it's – they work their whole – for four years they work to try to get there for 12
Starting point is 01:15:47 for 9 seconds 9 point and dude the guy that comes in second like ran like a 9.84 and the guy that won is 9.79
Starting point is 01:16:01 so because of 6 3 100th of a second or five or whatever, six. Six. Six. If that was 8.2, I want to say it was 8.2 because I thought they said maybe it was 9.82. So it was three one hundredth of a second. That's a Seinfeld joke of just now, now, now, now, now, now.
Starting point is 01:16:22 He's like if he had a pimp on his nose, he would have won. That's fine. Voluntary luge? I learned the voluntary luge is my favorite. They got a world record. Didn't even want to do it. They just throw them down on that thing. World record.
Starting point is 01:16:40 Didn't even want to do it. That's one of my favorite Seinfeld. I think of that line all the time. The first drug suspension was in 1968. The guy was drunk. He tested positive for alcohol. I mean. He drank several beers before the pentathlon, which is fencing, shooting,
Starting point is 01:16:59 swimming, riding, and cross-country running. That sounds like the only thing that I would say you can't drink on. Like every other thing, if you do one of those alone, I would be okay with it. And then that would be the only one that you're like, but obviously this one you can't drink. The one that involves shooting? And fencing, yeah.
Starting point is 01:17:17 Yeah, shooting and fencing. I got them. No, I'll take care of it. What country? Is he an American? No. Swedish. Swedish. What country? Is he an American? No. Swedish. Swedish.
Starting point is 01:17:29 Oh, they probably drink. Yeah. Yep. They have a good time. His name is Hans. Hans Gunnar. The youngest Olympian was 10. Wow.
Starting point is 01:17:39 The youngest gold medal winner is 13. Who's that? He's got to be gymnast, right? Female gymnast. Marjorie Gestringuring youngest female individual gold medalist in history didn't say what she did yeah why would it not say what she did oh uh springboard diver i'm sorry i had a rear head oh diving diving yeah it's the most i gotta be honest i've been well that's a pretty easy my whole life yeah springboard diving is the most exciting event I've ever watched. Really?
Starting point is 01:18:06 No, dude. I don't believe any of this. The regular diving was, I remember Greg Louganis, the regular diving was huge. Yeah. I remember watching that. He hit his head on the board. I remember it. I remember watching it live.
Starting point is 01:18:18 At the Olympics he did? Yeah. Yeah. I remember watching it live. It was a big deal. Yeah. That's not pretty exciting. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:18:24 And then he won the gold, I think, right? Yeah. Hit his head on the board, had to get stitches in the back of his head, and then came back later and won the gold. In the same Olympics? Mm-hmm. Wow. 1988.
Starting point is 01:18:37 Yeah. Yeah, I do remember watching it. I was like nine. It's one of the first things I remember. First, like, a sports a sports moment Oh a springboard He wasn't doing the springboard Yeah Oh my god
Starting point is 01:18:57 He just clipped his head Oh man Concussion and received five stitches And then Still 35 minutes later he gets back Oh, man. Concussion and received five stitches. And then still. 35 minutes later, he gets back. And goes out and lands it and nails it. For those of you listening, we're watching a YouTube video.
Starting point is 01:19:17 Yeah. Greg Louganis. How about that? Yeah. That's pretty cool. From 1900, 1920, they had the tug of war? Yeah. That's pretty cool. From 1900 to 1920, they had the tug-of-war of export. Yeah? The first winner was the London Police Department.
Starting point is 01:19:33 I mean, that sounds... They won an Olympic gold medal. Yeah. Different countries could just enter different teams, and they'd just be your buddies. It's almost like a softball league. Yeah. If you've got a church group or something. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:19:46 And the London Police Department won the gold medal. I think they beat the Liverpool Police Department. Wow. They should bring back Tug of War. That would be a lot of fun. Yeah. Yeah. That'd be great.
Starting point is 01:19:59 It'd be great. Just all your strong men. Just your street. Who's the... I was like, you put the big fat dude at the end yeah it's like the anchor big boy at the end he comes in last they tie he has to he's now he's already out there they tied the rope around him before the two big ones they tie the rope around them before they get going yeah they can just see right every country just starts yeah you just see it right every country just starts they uh the two big fellows walk out together ropes are ropes just laid down in between them because they got it tied around
Starting point is 01:20:31 their waist and they then they go stand tight get it taught and then then the other men come and grab it yeah they should i'm on board with that yeah that might be alabama might have a chance if we do that in the state o Olympics, we might have a good shot. Tug of war? With a tug of war. Yeah. Yeah. And that country strength.
Starting point is 01:20:50 Right. Where it's like that farm strength. Mm-hmm. It's stronger than, it's just different. Right. It's a different kind of strength. You feel like Nebraska would do really well in it. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:20:58 Places like that. Holland Hay, yeah, exactly. Farm guys. Mm-hmm. And we got some. And just doing tug of war. And we got some fat people too. Just regular life.
Starting point is 01:21:08 I think you're in more tug of war situations than most people. In Alabama? Yeah. In Alabama, I just think you're never too far from a tug of war happening. There's always a cracker barrel chair when y'all are both fighting over it. Yeah, there's something. There's some kind of tug of war. A family reunion. Tug of war happened. There's always a cracker barrel chair when y'all are both fighting over it. Yeah, there's something. There's some kind of tug of war.
Starting point is 01:21:26 A family reunion. A tug of war. Yeah. You're never too far from a tug of war. I asked my wife that question about if you had to do
Starting point is 01:21:37 Olympic sport to blend in, which one it'd be. I'd love to say it was figure skating or ballet or gymnastics. But she told me she won the California Junior Powerlifting Championship
Starting point is 01:21:49 when she was in high school. Wow. Wow. So she would do that. Yeah. That's awesome. So she, unlike us, probably you either, in high school, they're thinking about credits and extracurricular activities
Starting point is 01:22:03 to put on application for college. So she just took a bunch of stuff just to look good on a resume. That was one of them. She took powerlifting and she won the championship.
Starting point is 01:22:11 Yeah. She's stronger than you. Well, that was a given, yeah. I didn't need her to tell me that to know that. I would love to see you and her go at a
Starting point is 01:22:19 powerlifting. Well, wrestle, but yeah, just a powerlifting contest. That's our next Krispy Kreme challenge. Yeah, yeah. Me and Ruth. Outlift Ruth.
Starting point is 01:22:28 Who can squat the most. Yeah. I wonder what her, like, is it, what were they powerlifting? She said they were on, what's the famous beach where guys work out? Venice Beach? Venice Beach. Yeah. And all those muscle-bound guys were like their spotters and stuff.
Starting point is 01:22:44 Yeah. She said it was just ridiculous. A 16-year-old girl out there and got some muscle head spotting her and stuff. Yeah. Man, that's awesome. Yeah. But she got into Stanford, so it worked. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:22:56 Did she power lift at Stanford? No, but you just have to show that you're well-rounded, I guess. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. By not being well-rounded and working out. That's what they go. And and working out and they go and they go erin got into notre dame literally about being well-rounded yeah oh that's so he does a lot of stuff oh no i mean he's rounded yeah oh you mean
Starting point is 01:23:20 it's only missing all right well he's already in him in. So, we can't take him back, obviously. But going forward, I promise I will be better at the job. That's how. Were you thinking that way to get into a nice college that you had to do? Senior year, yeah. I was doing all. I went in deliberately. I was like, I want to take all the hardest classes. Just put on a just to say that i did yeah yeah i was doing all that i
Starting point is 01:23:50 wasn't taking weight lifting though there was a limit but you were doing it to impress like notre dame yeah yeah um i never even thought of it yeah you. You were too qualified. You already knew how to keep score. Yeah. Yeah, I already knew. I already knew stuff. Yeah. In the 1960 Olympics, Ethiopian runner,
Starting point is 01:24:12 his running shoes didn't fit properly, so he ran the marathon barefoot and won. Wow. Do you guys remember the track guy who pulled his,
Starting point is 01:24:23 or tore his, was it his ACL or his quad or something while he was running and his dad came out and helped him finish? I've seen that in some commercials and stuff. Yeah, I remember watching that. That was crazy. The first Olympics I can remember was the 1984 Summer Olympics because the basketball team had a guy from Vandy on it. Oh, yeah? Jeff Turner.
Starting point is 01:24:44 Jeff Turner. This was before professionals could play. And he played on the – and they won the gold. Yeah. I was so excited. So my ball up there, one of the baseballs I have, I threw a no-hitter in my little league baseball. And my coach was Coach Turner, and his son's Jeff Turner.
Starting point is 01:25:05 And Michael Turner was his brother. So they're from Nashville? They're from Nashville. And so I knew them. Like Jeff, we knew about Jeff when he was playing for Orlando. But his dad coached me in baseball. That's cool. Coached Jim Turner, I believe.
Starting point is 01:25:22 And then his brother, Michael Turner, played basketball at Murray State. Because I was a catcher. And I remember when I was – his brother, Michael, was a year older than me. And so Jeff was already in – I think already in the pros. And I remember Michael was, like, obviously a great athlete. He went and played basketball at Murray State. And I was catching. And I remember he threw hard, so hard one time it knocked my glove off. And I was like, yeah. And then my other time catching, I don remember he threw so hard one time, it knocked my glove off.
Starting point is 01:25:45 And I was like, yeah. And then my other time catching, I don't remember if I told the story, but I called a timeout and went out and talked to him, just because I would see that on TV, and I always wanted to do it as a catcher. Yeah, so I just go, timeout, everybody. And I run out, and I don't have anything to say to him. I just went out there, and he looks at me, and I was like, just keep throwing those strikes, man.
Starting point is 01:26:06 And he smiled and goes, okay. And then I ran back and I was like, time back in. Didn't you have like a chiropractor or something who was an Olympic medalist? Yeah. A guy I went to, he's in Mount Julia. He did Bob, I want to say bobsledding. Bobsledding with four guys? I think so.
Starting point is 01:26:28 And then he did, they won the bronze or something. He was a sprinter, but that was not good enough. And so what they would do, the bobsledding, they would sometimes get the sprinters because they need the guys that can run fast. So if you were not good enough to make it, I think, as a sprinter in the Olympics, they would be like, well, why don't you come do bobsled? And then you can run and do that. Because you got to think, they won the bronze. And you're just the guy who pushes off when you sprint and jump in the back?
Starting point is 01:27:03 Yeah. He might have been the, I don't know if he was the in the back yeah he might have been he might have been the i don't know if he was the first guy or maybe he was the last guy yeah and you're but you're just running and he uh because i mean he's they would compete this sport is huge and bob says it's really i forget what country there's there's some countries where it's like enormous and uh he's like i was like can you ever hear anybody and he's like no he's like you just don't he goes maybe if they would like compete at a place that they i forget somewhere they would compete where they'd have a lot of fans and you would be going around and you'd be like over people
Starting point is 01:27:36 partying right below you and you might hear like oh like you just hear like a brief yeah like you just barely hear something but you can't really hear it. You're just going, dude. Man. Yeah. I think he won a bronze. That's amazing. Is he a big guy?
Starting point is 01:27:54 Just very in shape. Yeah. His wife was a newscaster. Channel 5. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, you knew her. She came after I left, but we've met. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:28:03 Yeah. How far back in the Olympics, back on this, do you think you'd have to go in time before you could win? Like, what are they doing back in ancient times? You think you could win something then? Probably. Yeah. You think you could beat the cook?
Starting point is 01:28:17 Yeah. Racing? In a run? Well, not if they – Sprinting? Am I allowed to wear clothes? Do I go? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:28:23 Do you want to? Yeah. Yes. Okay? Yeah. Yes. Okay. I could go back. Baseball. Go back to before the sport was invented. I could beat them back then.
Starting point is 01:28:35 In baseball? Oh, yeah. And you know how to play the sport. And I know, and I have to explain to them how the sport works. So maybe not. You wouldn't win on just pure being an athlete. You would win on just pure they don't know how. You don't tell them everything.
Starting point is 01:28:49 They don't have a baseball team. They don't have a baseball team, yeah. You run home and you win 20 to nothing. You go, oh, by the way, the goal is to touch home. And I touch it. They're all stopping at third. Yeah. And you go, and I win gold.
Starting point is 01:29:02 I win gold. Yeah. You at least need an umpire that knows the rules. Yeah. Yeah, that's true. What about you? Do you have one? Weightlifting?
Starting point is 01:29:11 How far back I'd have to go? Yeah. I'd have to. I wouldn't. The modern Olympics, 1896 ain't going to do it. Okay, you got to go back another 1,500 years. I got to go before Christ. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:29:21 Back to BC times. Yeah. I don't know. Badminton? Badminton. I to BC times. Yeah. I don't know. Badminton? Badminton. I don't know. I don't know. Badminton looks pretty tough, man.
Starting point is 01:29:30 Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. I don't know. Have you seen- Breakdancing? You don't know if you could ever win an Olympic event. Even in ancient times.
Starting point is 01:29:40 Even in ancient times. In the history of the Olympics. Yeah, where everybody's five foot one. Yeah. And they haven't had protein their whole life. Yeah. You could probably take them out. In the history of the Olympics. Where everybody's five foot one. Yeah. And they haven't had protein their whole life. Yeah. Could probably take them out. Something.
Starting point is 01:29:49 Yeah, I don't know why. They're all malnourished. They put you in the women Olympics. They hear you. They want you to show up. There you go. All right, man. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:30:00 He's so feminine as he walks over. He carries his, he has his bag he's got one of those like uh you know the bags when you're trying to use plastic at a grocery store he's got he's got that bag tote bag he's got just a tote bag that says houston oilers on it it's got his uh he goes can i put this you have a lockers or something like that and they're like what i remember i can remember mary lou retton yeah i don't know if i remember that 84 she was i didn't i forgot how young she was she was 16 when she won the gold she was the first american that's so young to be you know I imagine, I guess it feels like forever because you're, you know, you're probably 10 years old when you start.
Starting point is 01:30:50 I mean, they probably start at five years old. Yeah. Probably two. And that's all they've ever done. That's all they've ever done. Yeah. Like that one girl that, one girl's from here, went to Harper. Oh, the swimmer?
Starting point is 01:31:01 Yeah, the swimmer from Nashville. And they showed her to swim you know because we showed harper because harper takes swim and um they showed her and the old video it's crazy too the video of her is like on their phone probably that's what's insane like it's you know our old kid videos are like you have to you can't just show them you'd have to have vcr or something slide and it's crazy that they just have videos of just it's like yeah look at this girl and oh that video and it looks he looks old and you're like it's not it looks amazing yeah uh i was thinking of that reason like you're seeing who was i thinking about I was thinking about that watching, like, people's whole...
Starting point is 01:31:47 Like, I was thinking of Snoop Dogg. Snoop Dogg's in a commercial, like, Corona commercial, right? Yep. How old is Snoop Dogg? He's in his 50s? He's my age, I think so. Is he? I think so.
Starting point is 01:31:55 I think... Huh? It's just hilarious. I thought he was older than you. That you and him are... Me and Shaq are the same age. 49. 49.
Starting point is 01:32:02 So we're the same age. Same age. Martha Stewart is 79 years old Dr. Dre is 56 so there's a good one Dr. Dre is 56 he's going to be 60 soon my parents are 66
Starting point is 01:32:14 65 or 66 so he's going to be 56 you got to think have we really watched people I guess have you really watched people on TV, they're famous, and then they die of old age? What are you asking? Have we really even seen that? Snoop Dogg's been on TV.
Starting point is 01:32:38 Oh, since TV's been around? Since TV's been where you've been the most around, 80 90s they've been on tv the whole time you know you have me of andy griffith but like what we know now is like modern i'm not saying dying young like like a tragic death but i'm saying truly you're like i watched their whole this guy lived 80 years on television yeah the first person comes to mind to me is shirley temple she was a child star right when movies and TV started. And then she lived a long life. She just died a few years ago.
Starting point is 01:33:09 Oh, really? So. Yeah. So I guess it's your. Man. You got to think about your. I guess what would be your kind of thing? Because I guess your age.
Starting point is 01:33:20 So you probably wouldn't think Snoop Dogg. I don't know. No. But Snoop Dog dog would be probably for you know us y'all were peers uh but like you know or something like that or doctor like they've been or whatever they've just been on in tv they've been they've just been on tv and around i mean doctor he's 56 56 years old i feel like 60s when you start going like, oh, that's old. You're saying basically famous their whole life. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:33:48 Yeah. And you're like, well, I'm watching. Then I'm going to watch this person be. That's like when you see Peyton Manning retire where you're like, I remember him in high school. I mean, not high school. I remember him in college. I don't remember him in high school.
Starting point is 01:34:00 I remember I saw Shaq play. And then you're like, Shaq's 49. But those guys were older. But now you're watching people retire, and then you're older. I'll date myself again. Brooke Shields. I remember her as like a child star, Jordache jeans. She's like probably pushing 60 now.
Starting point is 01:34:18 She's in her 50s. Wow. Yeah. Yeah, Cindy Crawford. Yeah, I mean, I don't remember her until she was an adult. Yeah. But. Oh, Brooke Schill was a child, like a child actress.
Starting point is 01:34:31 Yeah, Drew Barrymore, for that matter. Yeah, Drew Barrymore. Drew Barrymore, yeah. E.T. And you watch that person grow up. I think she's about my age. It'll be the Olsen twins for me, I think. The Olsen twins would be there for me too
Starting point is 01:34:46 because I really remember watching Full House. And I really remember watching Full House. That's the very beginning. That's the very... Oh, you're not even... What are you thinking about? No, I'm thinking about the Olsen twins. Yeah, they were like...
Starting point is 01:34:55 Are you thinking Full House? They were like newborns when they were on Full House. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. I remember watching that. And then they had a bunch of their own shows and movies. Like they would be... Yeah, like they're... How old are the Olsen twins? Like they're probably 35.
Starting point is 01:35:09 I just look up Carrie Strug, the Olympic gymnast. You remember her in 96? I thought she'd still be young. 35. 35. Carrie Strug is like in her 40s now. I don't know who that is. She was the one in the 96 Olympics that injured her leg.
Starting point is 01:35:24 And then she did pole vault again. and I'm probably messing that up. Yeah, she's 43. She's older than Nate. But she was so small, and to me that seems like that just happened. I thought she was – oh, she's probably 28 now. She's 43. 43. Wow.
Starting point is 01:35:41 I can't remember how we got off on that. Yeah. Speaking of people that were in the Olympics. Oh, I mentioned Mary Lou Retton and how young she was. That's what it was. That's how we got off on that. Rulon Gardner, remember the Olympic wrestler who upset the Russian who had never lost?
Starting point is 01:36:00 Do you remember this? 2000, this Olympic wrestler, he'd never lost a match in 13 years and hadn't given up a single point in the previous six and then this American wrestler upset him in the in the oh this looks like my guy dude yeah I love it and he lost gold with American one gold over the Russian yeah it was one of the biggest upsets in the Olympics. Wow. Never heard of him. Rulon Gardner. Sounds like Gardner is that – what's that movie? The –
Starting point is 01:36:34 Baseball movie with the kid that has the fast arm. Rookie of the Year? Yeah. Is that it? Henry Gardner? Yeah. Rookie of the Year? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:36:46 That's impressive. Pulled that out yeah what is it is it gardner it's gardner in the yeah oh that's his character's name yeah wow it's even more impressive i thought you're not the actor yeah i thought it was henry um it's yeah henry rowan gardner Rowan Gardner Yeah That's what So Rulon Gardner Was made me think Of Rowan Gardner Yeah
Starting point is 01:37:09 The old name Yeah I think we talked about The Miracle on Ice Maybe in the 80s episode Yeah And we talked about The Dream Team
Starting point is 01:37:16 Upcoming 90s episode There was that 30 for 30 About the USA Versus Soviet Union Basketball In 72 Yeah
Starting point is 01:37:24 That was a crazy. It was a crazy game. Yeah. Do you know this? Well, there was some dispute about how it ended. They gave them like three tries. Yeah. But three seconds left on the clock, inbound, something happened.
Starting point is 01:37:34 Nope, do it over. Three seconds. Nope, do it over. Is this in Moscow? I don't think it was. I think it was. Oh, it was? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:37:42 They were the home country? Yeah. That was the thing? That was the thing. Okay. I believe that they let them do it. They let them do it was. Oh, it was? Yeah. They were the home country? Yeah. That was the thing? That was the thing. Okay. I believe that they let them do it. They let them do it like three times, and then they won. And they're like, can you believe it?
Starting point is 01:37:52 That was in Berlin. Never mind. Yeah. So it's the same thing. I literally just, the first city I saw, I just yelled it out that that was where it was. But I didn't even confirm that. Yeah, it was crazy. Wakti Gate was even confirm that yeah yeah it was crazy uh walk the gate was the last of them was 2016 brian ryan lochte yeah you're too young to remember that no i remember
Starting point is 01:38:13 ryan lochte what was lochte gate that was the thing they said they got what held at gunpoint yeah but it was made up it was made up what were they doing they were what there was something crazy they were urinating outside a gas station yeah yeah yeah and they and it was like a big they lied about it i mean it's uh it kind of ruined that guy yeah i haven't heard much from him but something else happened that i forget what it was yeah i mean he just kept bearing like he had a weird apology on twitter. Yeah. And he said a bear attacked him. Yeah. Like the other guy. It's all right, everybody. This bear.
Starting point is 01:38:51 So some future Olympics. We got another one come up in six months. Oh, really? The Winter Olympics in Beijing 2022. Oh, because it's. Because of COVID. COVID. We're a year behind. So in six months, the Winter Olympics will be starting.
Starting point is 01:39:03 And in five months, the U.S. Figure Skating Championships held here in Nashville. Oh. You going to go? I might. Yeah. Go alone. That's buy a single ticket.
Starting point is 01:39:13 Bogo. Ruth goes, can I go? And you go, no, I'm going to go. I'm going to do this alone. You go lift some weights. Yeah. I think your ticket's over at Yeah I don't know where What's the other
Starting point is 01:39:27 Not Bridgestone But the other The old arena Oh Municipal Auditorium? Yeah I think powerlifting's at Municipal Auditorium I'm going to be over at Bridgestone with Yeah
Starting point is 01:39:41 With the ladies With the ladies So we got Beijing next year 2024 Olympics is in paris 2026 winners in milan cortina two different places in italy 2028 in la the third time it'll be held in la in 2032 in brisbane australia why they do la again because it was just i don't know what are the olympics were in atlanta right yeah and then because then they were here it's always because people drove down there and i feel like it's
Starting point is 01:40:10 usually i've read really bad for those cities that host olympics right they spend billions of dollars to build these place things and then once you're done if you don't have teams to use it it's a waste of money yeah and tokyo is really suffering because they don't get to use it, it's a waste of money. Yeah. And Tokyo is really suffering because they don't even get to have fans. Yeah. It's crazy. Yeah. They built all that infrastructure
Starting point is 01:40:30 and they can't even go there. Yeah. They're adding a couple events to this year's coming up Winter Olympics. Women's Monobob. Thank God. Which is like bobsled, but you do it alone.
Starting point is 01:40:43 Freestyle skiing aerial. It's called bow. Bowsled. And big air. Freestyle skiing big air where you get a really fast start and launch very high and do some freestyle stuff. Tricks and stuff. That'd probably be fun.
Starting point is 01:40:57 Let's go. That's a lot of let's go. There's a lot of that. Someone's board says let's go, and they're upside down. Surfing is going to stick around, but Paris doesn't have board says let's go and they're upside down surfing's gonna stick around but paris doesn't have anywhere to do it so they're gonna do it in tahiti 10 000 miles away from paris that probably will hey probably the you probably have great accommodations because you won't be jammed in with some city trying to do all this stuff and you'll be like
Starting point is 01:41:21 you'll be alone you'll probably stay at a very nice hotel get a helix mattress instead of cardboard helix mattress instead of cardboard uh yeah the surfing that surfing stomach because i'm watching that documentary or whatever on the surfing but what other big sport do you feel like they should add cornhole i could see corn they're showing on tv that i watched the other night when we were at that restaurant and it seemed like pretty competitive and you can't like the the teams didn't even make sense that one guy was like it was one uh one team was like it looked like a married couple like both in their late 50s maybe early 60s and then they're playing this young, kind of tatted black dude and this girl that kind of looks just goofy,
Starting point is 01:42:10 like a white girl that's kind of goofy looking. And they won. And it was just like a very, you were like, what is this? It's kind of beautiful. Yeah, it's beautiful. Bringing the world together. So Cornhole, if they have that, I could see that becoming. American football. Yeah. Oh. Yeah, I'd like that, I could see that becoming. American football.
Starting point is 01:42:25 Yeah. Oh. Yeah, I'd like that. But I mean, no other team would. I don't care. We would win. We'd be playing ourself. We could represent the Americans maybe.
Starting point is 01:42:36 Yeah, do they not do soccer in the World Cup is where they do soccer? I guess so. I guess they just do because the World Cup just. Yeah. Why don't they do soccer in the Olympics? Yeah. You know? I don't know. I was sitting just do, because the World Cup just. Yeah. Why don't they do soccer in the Olympics? No. You know? I don't know.
Starting point is 01:42:48 I was sitting here thinking, do they do? I don't guess they do. I guess the World Cup's such a big event itself that maybe that's. Yeah. Three-legged race. Yeah. I could do that. There you go.
Starting point is 01:42:57 Sack race. I used to do. I remember doing a sack race. And you do that school three-legged race. You put an egg on a spoon and you have to run around. That was y'all's bus when y'all grew up, right? Sack race. To school.
Starting point is 01:43:12 To school. You would grab the sack off the kid in front of you. You'd be over his shoulder and grab that sack and it's attached and y'all hopped to school. That's how sack race got invented i remember doing the three-legged race at school yeah i did that i remember doing field day was great so that was the best gonna have that fulcrum work together there you go if not it's not gonna work yeah fulcrum all Is that it? I think so Alright We did it We did it
Starting point is 01:43:46 I think this You know It's fine I liked it Learn some Olympics We did it all Yep We will see you next week
Starting point is 01:43:53 Everybody Have a great You know Couple Let's go folks Alright Thanks everybody for listening to the Nate Land Podcast Be sure to subscribe to our show on iTunes, Spotify
Starting point is 01:44:15 you know, wherever you listen to your podcasts and please remember to leave us a rating on our comment Nate Land is produced by me Nate Bargetti and my wife Laura on the All Things Comedy Network Recording and editing for the show is done by Gen, Nate Bargetti, and my wife, Laura, on the All Things Comedy Network. Recording and editing for the show is done by Genovations Media in partnership with Center Street Media. Thanks for tuning in. Be sure to catch us next week on the Nate Land Podcast.

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