The Nick DiPaolo Show - Anthony Cumia | Nick Di Paolo Show #1361
Episode Date: February 28, 2023Nick Interviews Anthony Cumia. Â Join Nick for bonus content at Patreon! www.patreon.com/thenickdipaoloshow Go see Nick on the road! www.nickdip.com/tour for tickets...
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🎵 Furthermore, you can all go fuck yourselves.
Hey, hey, take it easy.
Folks, how are you?
Welcome on a filthy Tuesday.
Tuesday, state of Georgia.
Great show for you today.
And, you know, this is one of my favorite people in the world
because he's so brutally honest.
You can go on Twitter or any of those Facebook.
He's brawling with people.
Around the clock, he's relentless, and he's right about everything.
Sorry.
Why do you say that?
Because we think alike.
Anyways, you know him from originally Opie and Anthony,
where they just killed it, man.
And he's one of the funniest bastards I know.
Can't believe he's not a stand-up.
Funnier than a lot of the stand-ups I know.
Of course, Star was on show, the Anthony Cumia podcast.
Please welcome my friend, Anthony cumia one of my favorite
people um i'm glad he wasn't a stand-up because it would have been another fucking guy uh you know
i would have had to jump the line at the cellar um i was saying to dallas i go i'm glad you weren't
a stand-up because i would have never got to hear you do radio and shit you know because comics
when you're all headline is what you would have been, you
cross each other in the night. You don't see each other
unless you go to the comedy cellar.
You never get to hang out
with. So it was
Anthony is just a funny fuck. Every time we
get together, people think
we're like the Italian version of those old
Muppet guys up in the fucking balcony.
I don't know why
because we talk honestly you know i love how
that's labeled you know uh what's the fucking word i'm retro yeah yeah that's the worst thing
you could do is actually just speak openly and honestly about uh what's going on in the world
what's blatantly by the way in your face it's not even you're not even making a suggestion
or here's my opinion on something.
You're literally stating facts that can be looked up by anybody.
And that's a terrible thing.
And you're hurting feelings.
And it's, you know, what we do.
Yeah, that's called retro.
And I'm like, OK, but what you're doing now going forward.
I call it absolute fucking lying and horse.
There's two types of people in the world.
There's honest people and there's politically correct people.
That's how I break it down.
If you're for all this woke shit, you're fucking, you're dishonest.
You're phony.
There's so many, the black thing right now, Anthony, I know not that I shied away from
it.
I can't take it anymore. I can't take, you know, in the last week,
I hear about like a black middle school,
a bunch of white kids being herded into a room by a bunch of black kids
and making them say shit about BLM, you know, take an oath basically.
I've heard about a woman getting an argument with a black woman
at a grocery store, a white woman,
as she was putting her groceries
in the car, and the black woman shoots her in the
back. I saw a clip,
this is over the last week, I saw a clip
of a student, 6'6",
270 pounds, lay out
his fucking little white
college-age teacher, girl,
woman. That's just three three there's about five more
that i well nick nick you know here's the here's your problem nick you don't go you don't look at
context that big black dude that bowled over the slight teacher yeah she had taken away his
nintendo switch so he had every reason to bowl her over knock her out on the floor so she would
need to actually go to the hospital do you guys realize he's not kidding that's what that's what
caused it he's like i know it was a special school or whatever the fuck but my point being is if
that's not bad enough then there's no mention of it other than dipolo and comia and and may you know there's
no mention of it anywhere on the on fucking they won't even do it on fox so do you guys really want
to take care of the race problem this country or keep jerking yourselves off it's fucking insane
to me god bless what's his name scott adams the guy that did Dilbert, you heard about him, right? Getting canceled.
That happened.
I wasn't even that familiar with Scott Adams.
I know Greg Gutfeld kept telling me, that's my hero.
He's fucking unbelievable.
Bah, bah, bah.
So then I read this thing, and he said, you know,
after watching white people getting the shit kicked out of them for the last five years, which I said on a show last week,
in viral videos and some other shit that just went down.
He said, we have to,
the only advice I can give you
is to get away from black people.
He goes, we've been trying to help them.
And he goes, oh, the other thing was
they took a poll, 51% of black people said
it's not okay to be white.
And he said, that makes them a hate group.
So I want nothing to do with them. We're white and he said yeah that makes them a hate group so i want
nothing to do with them we're white and fucking and i'm not look i know we always have to say this
right anthony i'm not talking about every but i live in savannah i chose to live in a town that's
majority black so i'm not a fucking racist everybody gets along great here but i'm saying
at some point at some point i want to hear the good black people speak up and go enough
already but i don't hear those voices i know they're out there here and there am i right
your thoughts no i think i think uh much like uh white people who go to work on a daily basis and
uh raise families or uh get their business in. Yeah, the good black people are doing the same thing.
I'm sure don't like, I've seen so many black people
that when these videos do pop up,
they're like, oh shit, here we go again.
Another one, like they know what's going on.
They see it.
But yeah, these are people that are preoccupied
with living their lives.
Unfortunately, we can't be like Antifa and the other shitheads all over the left that can get out there and spread their propaganda.
I'm from the school of thought.
Silly me. That may be everyone, like I just said before, can look up these facts, see it for themselves, and make some deductive reasoning in their own heads
and say this is the problem, this is the issue.
But again, that's hate facts.
You can't spread hate facts.
I know.
So we're fucked.
I got, yeah, I read a couple articles today, a couple stories I did on my show today.
And one of them is about Chick-fil-A in Royersford, by the way, Pennsylvania, the home of Soul
Joles.
I think you've been there, haven't you?
Sure, sure.
Yeah, that town is a Chick-fil-A.
They just had to pass a rule at the Chick-fil-A in Royersford that anybody under 16 has to
be accompanied by an adult now.
And then they went on to explain why.
But they never said the word black or whatever.
But it said because certain patrons, explicit language, breaking property, stealing.
Now, I'm not supposed to draw any conclusions.
I know I'm a bigot and racist.
It went on to other other shit it went on for
without mentioning race now right my point is you're never gonna solve it if that's if you
want true equality whatever the fuck uh equity you gotta be able to they always say we have to
have a conversation about race but you can't mention we're black no no one wants to have
that conversation they just want to continue lambasting straight white men.
And that's their honest conversation.
The second you bring up something that might actually put this situation in perspective, you're the piece of shit that needs to be silenced.
You can't speak at colleges.
You can't do gigs.
So their open and honest conversation is bullshit.
gigs, so their open and honest conversation is bullshit.
And years ago, if a chicken
fucking place decided you
needed 16, needed
a chaperone to get in,
I would think they were playing
Deep Throat on the wall when you went in there.
There's no other reason why
a 16-year-old shouldn't be able to
go to a fast food place
without supervision, unless, of course,
there's a trend going
on that no one wants to talk about.
That's funny. That's exactly what I'm going to do tonight. I'm getting a bucket
of chicken, and I'm watching porn on the
internet for like two hours. Yeah. Deep throat.
50th anniversary, I think. Something like that.
I don't know.
I want to get the director's cut with a
comment.
Yes, that's where we used a filter on her
asshole, so it looked like a bunny um uh yeah
so i the uh the also the videos like you say i i am inundated with these on a daily i know you are
i don't even look for them i don't even have to look for these videos i know they just are coming
across every day multiple times a day and And it's the same M.O.
You got young black people, guys and girls, just kicking the living shit out of either white people, Asians.
Yeah.
And then you'll get someone on social media going, oh, well, all races do this. And they get a video from 10 years ago of when the
fucking Eagles won.
And you know, some Philly
people going crazy.
And that's their
way to show, hey,
everyone does this. No,
they don't. Sorry.
Well, for every one
white kid that does that, that's say 250 non-white uh i'm tired
of it i can't it they've been throwing the gas on the fire forever and i forgot to mention the
most blatant one this past week a white kid coming home from work like college age. She's too, again, I don't know.
I'm guessing black kids.
I might be wrong on this one.
I don't think so.
It's freezing out. It was in Michigan and Minnesota.
I don't know where the fuck it was.
It was freezing out, three degrees.
So he asked them if they want to ride.
They get in the car.
They try to carjack him.
End up shooting him to death.
Now, again, I might be wrong on this one, but I, you know.
I think whenever you see a team effort going down on a carjacking or when it's two teams,
I think you could pretty much, again, put two and two together.
I don't think Belgians right off the bat, you know.
Belgians, the Swedes.
I know they're a bunch of rambunctious uh pale people uh always causing
trouble uh what what nick what do we do because i just get more and more pissed every day i post
it on social media and then people go dude you live here you do this why do you even care well
it it costs all of us dearly we are paying the price of a burdensome portion
of the population that we now need to what coddle and and and tell them they're awesome and at every
turn hand out awards as the behavior just gets worse and worse because maybe instead of awards and accolades a little shame uh should be uh doled out
amen we're talking to the great anthony comia if you couldn't tell the tone of the conversation
i should have said this is meet the press i'm chuck todd we'll be right back
you're a lying cunt
oh jesus nick holy shit um yeah i i just it really hit me it's been you know it's always
in the back of my mind but i you got you got to give yourself a rest from that's why you're
you're fucking relentless i have to get away from it i pretend everything's nice you know
yeah and and and but i kept reading the last couple weeks these stories are getting worse
and worse when i saw that young woman teacher get
knocked across the room uh i got a you know sister-in-law who's a teacher and it just that
could have been somebody's sister or yeah and and the fucking idiots in the room take five minutes
to break it up he gets on top of her and he's pounding her while she's unconscious
and people are nobody petrified yeah they're petrified to step up, stand up on trains when those blatantly shit behavior that you know is leading to an assault.
Nobody does anything because they're petrified to put their hands on these people. Because they know it's just going to end up with them either in jail or with your job gone, your family being harassed.
So they just go, hey, you know, do whatever you people do.
I'm okay.
It's terrible.
We're making matters worse.
Well, that and they are afraid to get knifed or shot because that happens, too.
I think that's the
first fear what you said is right behind it exactly uh that's why the cops aren't doing
their you know right hey and i said this and it got billy burr really upset um we were texting
back and forth a little you know he pretends to like me i know he hates my guts um no i don't
even pretend with me anymore.
Is that right?
No, I don't know.
I shouldn't say that.
Look, we were always opposite politically, obviously.
But I remember we were tweeting about something,
and I said, we don't need police reform.
We need a reform of the black family structure.
That's what needs reforming.
And I, and he left a message on my thing saying,
dude, on that one, you're astoundingly ignorant.
And I just fucking, you know, I know, I know.
My point was black illegitimacy rate
is the reason for a lot of our social ills,
meaning crime and poverty.
I'm not the
first one to say that fucking again pat was it pat moynihan in the 60s i always confused oh god yeah
yeah yeah that wrote that thesis about the destruction of the black family uh in the late
60s that was my only point and people way smarter than me have said that of all races. Way darker than you have said
that. It's part of the whole
thing now. You talk about the
clergy in the communities.
They make rhymes out of it. Silence
the violence. All kinds of shit.
And then you bring it up.
You're a piece of shit. I know.
I mean, anyways.
I fucking, I still,
I think me and Billy like each other.
Yeah.
But.
He likes a good, no, he likes a good lively debate.
Yes, he does.
As far as stuff like that goes.
And he's one of the funniest motherfuckers on the planet.
Yeah.
He's just, but, you know, it sort of, it's name calling.
You know, I'm ignorant now.
It's, you know, that's when you know you got
him i wasn't making a statement uh fucking you know that anybody hasn't heard um or hasn't read
a million times but anyways that caught me off guard but anyway he's playing fenway park and i'm
sitting here yeah yeah you know what else i've noticed you know what else i've noticed nick is the um a lot of the diversity hires that we've
seen over the past few years uh and i noticed this a little while ago and it's been petrifying me
it's starting to creep into industries where it kind of people knew maybe we need the most
qualified people and not just diversity hires the aviation industry is coming apart at the seams there are air traffic
controllers that are letting planes land when other ones are taken off there are ground crews
you saw that one black woman she got sucked into the fucking engine after they told her don't go
in front of an engine first of all do you have to be told not to stand in front of a running jet
fucking engine and she stands in front of this thing.
She gets pulverized going through.
And again, you're seeing people that are not qualified for these jobs.
And now it's part of, it's not just they're making your sandwich or coffee and stuff.
They're flying your planes.
They're maintaining your aircraft.
They're getting sucked into engines.
I don't like this.
I know.
I was on a flight.
It's already implemented this woke shit with the FAA.
Because I was on a flight like two weeks ago to Palo Alto.
I'm like, yo, what up?
What up, bitches?
We be out there.
Yo, we be out there.
Motherfucking about five.
Sit back.
Hit that pipe.
I look in the cockpit.
I'll holler back at you on the ground, yo.
If I could say N-words, it's way funnier, but I don't know.
When I walk on the plane, you know, you walk on a plane,
you take that quick look to the left to see who your flight crew is.
Yes.
And now I look like some bitch watching a horror movie.
I look like through my fingers.
I don't quite want to see, but I got to know.
I want to see the horror, but I really don't.
And, you know, you see that gray hair, the old guy that, you know, flew in Iraq or something.
That's great.
Yeah.
But when I, you know, I'm seeing a pair of Jordans on the rubber rudder pedals, I'm getting a little fucking nervous.
The co-pilot's got a hoodie on he's fucking eating a twix
yeah no uh i i used to do a bit about that when when when uh the terror shit was going on right
after 2000 what i and i said uh yeah but then i talk about how some of these gigs i do that i'm
so sick of doing in the middle of nowhere i'm'm hoping to get on, look in the cockpit as I'm boarding and see a Muslim pilot
crying, looking at a picture of his ex-wife as he's eating
a pork chop.
Or something like that. I can't remember my old shit.
You're probably not going to reach your destination.
That video, you posted a video of you
and opening up the door to your hotel room
doing one of these gigs.
And it was so fucking funny, Nick.
I got to do more of that, huh?
You hear that, Dallas?
I'm glad you said that
because I finally have some people
that know how to fucking work the internet.
You know, work.
I'm 61.
Good time to master the social media fucking thing.
Jesus Christ, I'm selling weed
to fucking 11-year-old kids behind my house
to make ends meet. You motherfuckers.
But Dallas, my producer, he comes
with me now to catch those moments
and he knows what triggers me.
Sitting there at the airport at 6 in the morning, he goes,
where are you? What time is it?
And then he follows me home at 11,
drinks in me. I'm in Arkansas
trying to open my door.
I get $30 worth of food
from the fucking hotel desk.
Gonna clog my ass
with Doritos
and fucking Snickers.
And you wonder why
there's a touch of bitterness.
But yeah,
so I'm doing that.
I'm glad you saw that.
I'm glad to see.
And people respond to
that shit you're right big oh they do there's you know uh uh and and you know obviously it's a place
for uh younger people as far as viral videos go but there are some people doing it you you know
i i watch your videos they're hilarious you know who else is a fucking dice. Dice going around telling people like
are you the one that wanted
to pitch you? Someone said
you wanted to pitch you with me and they don't
know him from a hole in the fucking wall.
And they're petrified. Some of these women run away.
He's like oh I must
have made a mistake. It's
so fucking funny. And he's sort of
making fun of himself. Isn't he there?
Yeah yeah which you know if you're Dice and you were the cool Dice character years ago, you better not try to still be doing that.
And he figured it out.
He knows to make fun of himself as the older guy that was that guy.
And his videos are pretty goddamn funny.
Well, you're relentless.
We're talking to the great Anthony Comia, by the way.
Twitter handle, at Compound Boss.
He's no longer the bitch.
Compound Boss.
Are you still in that building in Manhattan?
Yeah, yeah.
We're still here at 35th Street, right in the garment district, the cradle of broadcasting.
Yeah.
It works.
Oi!
Yeah, we've been here about nine years now.
Holy shit.
Hey, for some reason I thought you...
When are you getting your goddamn ass to self-care?
You better get down it, because I just read, read honest to god this morning in the news anthony the uh governor i
think the governor of south carolina whatever uh anyways he's he's uh he's slapping a 500 fee on
um people that are moving now into south carolina oh yeah which i know you can handle obviously i
moved i i i got i got my house. It's all built.
It's paid for.
It's, you know, I've lived in it a couple of, I go down there maybe for a week or a weekend to make sure the builders, because I have to have a studio built.
So I'm having that done.
Well, thanks for hitting me up.
What's that?
I said, thanks for hitting me up when you're in town.
I'm only a half hour from you.
Oh, please.
No, probably further than that, actually.
I went and took the course for my pistol license.
I got my driver's license, so I have ID.
And I'm going down this Friday to get my fingerprints done so I can get my concealed carry permit because I have priorities.
I don't even live in the fucking house yet, and I'm getting a gun immediately.
I saw a kid jogging around your house as it was being built.
I don't want to say anything.
Yeah, well, he jogs every day, I guess.
Yeah, you've got to be careful.
Yeah, yeah.
South Carolina, which surprised 4 million people in the last decade,
have moved into South Carolina.
Yeah.
Hold.
Even my cousin.
I think it's second to Florida.
Yeah, which makes me happy.
Dallas, we have to be up there, right?
Georgia?
Unfortunately, we're getting there, especially along the coast.
Yes.
Florida is like number one.
Yeah, no doubt.
That's where everyone's been going because of the taxes and whatnot.
Good segue.
And to DeSantis, are you a Trump man, a DeSantis man?
What's your take?
Go ahead.
I'll let you talk.
I'm probably on the same page as you on this.
And I talked about this the other day.
I don't think I'm very impressionable
when it comes to mainstream media
I know they're full of shit
I know they lie but there you talk about
relentless they are relentless and I'm not
sure if I've not
soured on Trump but it's a little
more tarnished than it was in
2016 and I'm
not sure if that's by my own
ideology and what I've seen or holy fuck,
am I susceptible to the nonstop bullshit that they drill in your head that maybe I'm going,
wow, he does seem to be a little more off kilter. And why is he fucking with DeSantis and
shit like that? So while I still support Trump, if he's the nominee, fuck, I would,
I would, this ashtray, if this ashtray was the Republican fucking nominee against the Democrat,
I'm voting for the ashtray. So it's not like I wouldn't support Trump, but it is nice to see
someone like DeSantis that is a little more savvy and might be able to get more shit done. He got
shit done in Florida.
So between the two of them, and let's remember,
DeSantis hasn't even announced anything yet.
I mean, it's pretty obvious, but he hasn't announced yet.
But between the two, yeah, let me see.
There's plenty of time left.
And either one, I would vote for either one in a second.
Exactly.
That's exactly where I am.
I do like that DeSantis doesn't come with all the baggage.
Yeah.
But a part of me loves the fact that Trump, I just never seen anybody as mentally tough
as Trump.
Yes.
I've never seen a guy that run towards the fire and the controversy and eats it up because
any attention is good attention to him.
He fucking can't get enough.
And you need that in this job and he did he did he made a lot of good shit happen with you know with
these people trying to hold them back for four years and he got fucked not to mention on the
last election he got fucked in the ass by social media burying the fucking hunter store and a bunch
of other shit okay that was his don't tell me this jerk off got more votes than Obama and whatever the fuck.
So I'm with you.
But I do like, what a resume DeSantis has.
I didn't, he's like the lead fucking lawyer.
He's like a jag guy in the military.
Yeah, he's like a man.
He fucking, and he told the federal government
and a lot of the people in the state government down
in florida go fuck themselves when it came to the mandates and he was playing nice at the beginning
when everyone said hey two weeks to flatten the curve and sure wear masks do this right but then
he saw the bullshit really early on and said no my state the kids are going to school without masks
you don't need fucking vaccinations for this, that, and the other thing.
And I respected the shit out of that.
And apparently a lot of Americans did too,
because that's when they started moving down there in droves.
Yeah, yeah.
So, yeah, it depends what polls you read.
Like two weeks ago, I saw that Trump was up like 25.
And then this week, I guess they're different demographics.
But DeSantis was like smoking him in a few polls.
So I don't know.
I'm with you, Anthony.
I either way.
Hey, is there any rule saying they can't work together somehow?
Maybe eventually.
I know the ego.
I think Trump's gearing up.
I think Trump's gearing up for a big primary.
He's gearing up for another 17 candidates like it was in 2016.
And he needs to be on his A-game and start giving them shit so they drop off one by one.
I don't know how well that's going to work with DeSantis.
But maybe when it's him and DeSantis are the only two left maybe they could work
together a little better
this is Trump on his A game during a debate
you got small hands
little hands
low energy
low energy
low energy Jeb
Marco Rubio
fucking names
and they stick.
That's a businessman.
He believes in branding.
My brother does too.
My brother's a business guy.
Always talking about branding.
My agent.
Branding.
My agent.
Do you know Tommy, the big Italian guy?
You probably do.
Yeah, sure.
Tommy.
Yep.
The first time.
This is why I love Tommy.
Most managers and agents, when you first sign with them, they go, big fan, big fan. They always
give you that fake love. Always loved
your shit. They couldn't name two of your jokes.
Tommy looks at me and goes like this,
just so you know, if we work
together, he goes, you're a brand to me.
Holy shit!
And I went, just so you know,
you're my manager. If you're my manager, I'm going to
say, get me a Diet Coke, bitch, and don't
get your nose out of joint.
But yeah, Coke, bitch. And don't, don't get your nose out of it. Yeah. Yeah.
But,
uh,
yeah,
no,
absolutely.
Um,
branding is,
uh,
Trump's thing.
The Santa's making all the right moves for the last year,
whether it's going after it,
right.
All the,
all the smut in school for these young kids that are going after Disney.
Disney is a cult and they're scary.
They,
they're way more fucking nefarious
than anybody realizes my wife's reading these books about uh mk ultra and all these they are
you know anthony you read this shit they are fucking creepy creepy i always thought they're
a cult just from the ears wearing those stupid but uh the uh when when you see some of the shows they're putting out directed directly toward
children this isn't some kind of thing that oh the kids like it because it's kind of a cartoon
but there are adult stories to literally children's cartoons and it's they might as well have just
called it fuck white people just call it fuck white. That's pretty much what it is. They don't think that has a
psychological effect
on people. Of course it does.
They are. You are right. Disney
is one of the most evil,
nefarious entities
in this country. They have
the eyes
and ears of so many
Americans, adults and kids.
Their theme parks are
packed. Their movies, people go see them.
And they are practicing
in what really amounts to mind
control. Indoctrination.
When you're going after young people, that's a definition
of indoctrination. Get them while they're young.
So why are these parents, I'm guessing
these parents are already woke and brainwashed too.
Why are there still lines
at fucking Magic Mountain, whatever the faggy fucking ride never been down there uh well you know it's a small
world after what why why are the people shouldn't that's you can boycott them they're very specific
on how they make their money don't go to their movies don't go on their fucking stupid make
believe rides and you know i think when you get an adult and a parent and their kid is screaming they just want to go to Disney,
you have to make a decision.
Do I come off as the shit parent
that won't take my kid to Disney because of my ideology,
or do I just suck it up, identify that it's evil,
but go there anyway?
I'm sure Satan has a great roller coaster down in hell.
Uh,
you know,
you got to make that choice.
Michael Jackson had a Ferris wheel in his yard.
So good point.
Exactly.
My father said,
you want to go to Disney?
Well,
I'll take it.
Does he grab me by my hair and he spun me around like this?
Tell me it was the tilt.
The world is on shit.
Um,
yeah.
So,
I mean,
boycott the fucks anyways. I think people have had enough and it's
finally yeah i've been hearing this for years and i'm the first one i go bullshit it's going to get
so much worse you have no idea i did i'm gonna i'm gonna wrap it up here because i know you got
shit to do uh good i'm watching we're talking to anthony comey by the way but uh i don't know if
you saw last night because i know you're a gun guy. And when did, wait, before I forget, do you have a date to move down here yet or no?
Why?
Right when my studio's built and I could broadcast them down there.
So probably it's not going to be till the summer, at least.
All right.
All right.
I'll be on the lookout.
In the meantime, don't worry about me, Nick.
I'm in the lap of luxury and a shitty one room apartment in Mineola
You told me
This guy had a mansion
But that's all guys need, am I right?
It's so easy
Oh my god, Anthony
I love my house, right?
And thank god my wife can do everything
From fucking fixing a sink
to uh making me mentally ill but um she you know i i and i love it it's a beautiful house i fucking
love it but i'll go to somebody's apartment even my buddy dallas i go to his apartment and
i don't think i get nostalgic because yes when you're in college you had a dorm room then you
got your own apartment when you came out of go and i'm like what i i i it's a tv there's a couch and there's a toilet
there's this guys are very minimal and that i you know you don't need it we don't need it i and i
came out of that you know the house i had in roslyn it was a fucking mansion it was huge and i'm in
this little fucking shitty apartment in miniola right by the train station
i've got my my high point is i'm 10 minutes from governors so i could go see some comics and hang
out with james and whatnot yeah levittown is like really close to fucking uh so yeah so i have a
great time and yeah i don't really give a shit i have a bed i have a tv i got my computer i don't need a lot of shit
i know and and like i said i'm lucky because i i also i do is i pay for it basically
and you know maybe take out the trash and
last couple years i got busted doing 102 they they could have thrown me in jail but because
of some covid law down here in georgia weren't putting people in jail. So they could have put me in jail. I was coming home from a gig.
I backed into a cop car, a sheriff's car in West Palm Beach. Had a few drinks with me a couple
weeks ago, coming home from my local bar. I hit the median strip, blew my tire out.
I backed into my late great buddy's car. Greg, this is all over the last year. I went 50 something
years without a fender bender.
And all of a sudden, I'm like a 90-year-old Mr. Magoo.
After a few drinks, I can't do shit.
But before I let you go, I died.
When relatives start talking about taking your keys away.
Yeah, my wife said that.
She goes, what the fuck are you doing?
And I had a spotless record, you know, for so many years.
And they could have sent me.
They could have arrested me the night I got here.
Yeah, no shit.
I've gotten over 100 mile an hour ticket.
And they let you know.
It's 2 in the morning.
I could fucking arrest you right now, you jackass idiot fuck.
It's not like I ran.
No, but it's fucking 2.30 in the morning.
I'm in fucking.
I mean, 18 wheelers are breathing down my neck.
I'm doing 95, so I kick it up a notch.
How about cut me a little slack because when you turn your lights on,
I fucking pull over, and I'm not running down the street
or saying, you know, don't touch me, or I'm resisting arrest.
I can't breathe.
Fucked up. I can't breathe. I can't breathe. Fucked up.
I can't breathe.
I can't breathe.
Yeah.
Real quickly, before I let you go.
Sure.
I don't know.
You probably don't watch American Idol.
I get a fucking kick out of it for a million reasons.
I've explained this on my show a million times.
It tells so much how PC this country is.
It's ABC, which is Disney.
It is ABC, right?
I think.
Which is Disney. Whatever. It's ABC, which is Disney. It is ABC, right? I think, which is Disney,
whatever. It gets so PC. And I like some unbelievable, talented kids that live in
Kentucky who are 20 years old with a guitar that sounds better than anybody I've ever heard in my
life. But the point is, did you read about this thing about last night? Kid comes on from Santa
Fe, Texas. He's about 20 years old mattress salesman
got a mullet real heavy Texas accent and uh he's got a great voice I mean almost like Chris
Stapleton I'm like holy shit so then uh one of the judges goes why do you want to be an American
Idol he goes well a couple reasons you know I want to show my talents and and saying to people
of my age and blah blah and and secondly he goes um goes, as I say, I'm from Santa Fe, Texas,
and a couple years ago we had a mass shooting at my school.
And goes into this whole fucking thing, and then, first of all,
he asked you why you want to be an American Idol.
What's that got to do?
Right?
So my radar goes off going, oh, here they go.
They saw our thing. They saw her.
They saw her thing.
They're going to fucking wedge this in.
It was the most awkward segue you have ever seen.
It had nothing to do with what he asked them.
They almost had to edit.
And then Katy Perry starts bawling her eyes out, Googling, and starts swearing.
This country has fucking failed us, blah, blah, blah.
She goes on this two-minute rant.
She's bawling her eyes out.
And then, you know, and then what's his name?
Who's the Commodores?
Lionel Richie.
What am I, 90?
Who are the Commodores?
Lionel Richie's like, oh, you know, rubbing her back and shit.
And Luke, Luke Bryan.
I think Luke Bryan, I swear to God, it was so orchestrated.
They had him.
They go, we can't have him being bummed out because he's the country singer.
You know how they feel about guns.
So we'll let the woman in black guy get all bummed out.
Dude, just watch it.
It was so, so obvious that ABC saw this in the kids' application when they tell stories about themselves
and said, we got to work this into a five-minute piece on gun control.
It is, oh, my God.
They always do shit.
They have the, oh, my mom is fighting cancer.
They have to have that angle where there's an interesting,
newsworthy story about the person.
Just fucking sing.
This isn't a news show.
It's a talent fucking contest no one gives a
shit and then again of course it's abc so it's their political agenda fuck off oh they can't
leave it alone man i i watch yellowstone and then the show 1883 and i love them both but the female
character in 1883 there's a girl she's supposed to be 18 years old. She goes on these diatribes that could come from a feminist meeting two weeks ago that don't even come close.
1883.
Yeah.
Yeah.
She, you know, she fucking does everything but reference fucking Gloria Steinem for Christ's sake.
I'm hoping Sam Elliott fucking kicks her in the twat and says, get back in the fucking wagon.
And it's a great show.
Other than that, they painstaking detail of what you know
what it looks like it looks like 1883 how the people talk what except when it comes to that
they gotta have a feminist whore in every writer's room going where's the part about the strong girl
so it's really a coming of age story about this girl who's smoking hot by the way as well
you know i i can I can overlook it. But, nah.
It's a great show.
It's fucked up because they need, the truth of the matter is, in 1883, women were inconsequential.
They were part of, you know, the support the man, make sure they have coffee and some grub on the table when they get home.
But their lives weren't this spectacular.
People were listening to what they had to say.
And wow, what an amazing woman.
It didn't happen like that.
So when they show shit like that in a show that's primarily authentic, it looks so out of place and ridiculous because it is.
I always say that when I'm watching with my wife
and they go into one of these fucking speeches. i said you understand how unrealistic she might as well have
a mcdonald's uh shamrock shake in her hand during this fucking scene how the fuck it has nothing to
do with 1883 it's fucking nothing and i know costner knows that and i know they just have to
put up with it i know they know know. They're smarter than that. Taylor
Sheridan is brilliant.
But there's, I don't know why
and I said it bothered me
more, I always said to Colin, the feminist thing
bothers me more than the civil rights black
thing. I said because
the feminists grabbed onto their coattails years ago
and just rocketed past
them and they're using their playbook
and it's driving me fucking cocoa.
They're at the center of political correctness
more to me than the civil rights, I swear to God.
But that's it.
Yeah, and it's great, though,
to see the transgender people
really tearing into the feminists
and making them sit there all cucked.
They can't do shit
because then they come off as transphobic.
I know.
They're eating each other alive.
It's so much. It's fucking great. Anthony,
I love your brother.
Yes, please. Look, what
town do you know in South Carolina? Are you far from
the Georgia border? I'm just outside
of Greenville, South
Carolina. It's a little more inland.
I didn't want to be on the beach. Hold on.
It's about four, four and a half hours from here.
Oh, fuck. We'll never see each other.
Anyway, I'll fly down there.
Fuck it.
He goes, I'll fly down.
Get a boat.
No, you're not on the beach.
No, but we have to.
Look, I'll drive.
You do my show.
I'll come up there for a day or two.
You come down here.
I love it.
We'll go out.
I got fucking acres of property there to shoot on and-
Do you really?
You know, light ATVs and shit.
Yeah. I got an AR-15 out of my bed that's loaded
I'm afraid of it I shot it when I bought
it two years ago I can't remember how to use it
and I'm fucking forgetful enough
to shoot myself in the face trying to get it out of the
goddamn
I'm gonna have to teach both of you Dallas is gonna
teach both of us well did not
Anthony has a
gun collection that would make you blush.
Oh, I have a few.
Barrett.50 Cal.
It's like Tony Montana's
living room.
It's fucking...
The Desert Eagle.50
and so many pistols
and old Enfields
and Garand rifles
from World War II.
I love this shit.
All right, brother man.
Thank you for doing this.
And that's Anthony Comia at Compound Boss on Twitter.
And he's always on this.
Thanks, Nick.
Nick, any fucking time.
You know I love sitting and bullshitting with you, man.
And yes, we absolutely will.
We're too close down there not to miserate.
We irritate the world when we get together.
I know.
I love it.
And for you people who are going to fucking shit on this,
go fuck yourself.
I had a time.
I'll see you later.
Thanks.
Thanks,
man.
Take it easy,
bro.
All right,
bro.
That is it for today.
Ladies and gentlemen,
that flew by a big thanks to Anthony.
Call me a,
who's as entertaining and funny as anybody.
I can't wait for him to get down here.
I have no male companionship.
I don't mean it that way.
Me and Dallas
fuck around with each other
a little bit.
But you know what I'm saying.
That is it.
Don't forget cameo.com
if you want me to roast
a friend or relative.
Go to cameo.com.
I'll make a little video
on my phone
and we'll tear them to ribbons.
Or we can be nice
and say happy birthday
to that broad you used to bang
in South Carolina.
That's it.
You guys think that I'll say it?
You're very welcome. See you back here tomorrow.
Take care, kids.
Hi. Good night, everybody. guitar solo Outro Music