The Nick DiPaolo Show - Anti-Everything #117
Episode Date: February 12, 2019Antifa A-holes to testify. Dumb lib college to disarm police. Chinese commercial tries ethnic cleansing.  ...
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As far as Stephen Colbert is concerned, that's right, Stephen.
That's the way it is.
So, you know, as I said in the movie Get Me Roger Stone, which unfortunately Robert Mueller watched and thought it was entitled Get Roger Stone.
I revel in the hatred of these leftist retards.
They're not talented.
They're not funny.
Trevor Noah, not funny.
Nick DiPaolo, now that's funny. Oh yeah, welcome to the show. How are you folks? A new week, a filthy Monday.
This is when a lot of the school shootings happen. They wrote a song about it. Tell me why I don't like Mondays.
Good to see you. Thought it started out on a bright note.
833-599-NICK. 833-599-6425 is the phone number.
833-599-NICK.
833-599-6425 is the phone number.
Glad to have you with us.
Real quick, dates, you can get them at nickdip.com.
Friday, February 22nd, Central Stage, Yonkers, New York.
Saturday, February 23rd, Cohoes Hall, Cohoes, New York,
shooting a one-hour special.
Saturday, March 2nd, the Brook Arts Center,
Bound Brook, New Jersey.
Friday, March 8th, Wood Theater, Glens Falls, New York.
Friday, March 29th, Decatur Civic Center, Decatur, Illinois.
Friday, April 26th, Steel Stacks, Bethlehem, Pennsylvania.
Friday and Saturday, May 3rd and 4th, Sidesplitters in Tampa.
Friday and Saturday, May 10th and 11th, Governors in Levittown, New York.
Friday, May 34th, Jonathan's at Gunkwit, Maine. Friday, May 31st, Jonathan's at Gunquit, Maine.
Saturday, June 1, Whites of Westport, Westport, Mass.
Saturday, August 10th, Newtown Theater, Newtown, Pennsylvania.
Friday and Saturday, August 16th and 17th, a great club,
one of the few clubs I do know, Helium in Philadelphia.
Saturday, October 19th, the Ridgefield Playhouse in Ridgefield, Connecticut.
Friday, November 15th, the Cortland Repertory Theater,
Cortland, New York.
And New Year's Eve,
Tarrytown Music Hall,
Tarrytown, New York.
Go to nickdip.com.
Not all of them have ticket links yet
because some of them are brand new.
Folks, do I have something good for you.
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So go to the site, then search for my name, click book a cameo,
fill in the info, and type in whatever it is you want me to say.
And within 48 hours, that message will be delivered by my acid tongue, cameo.com.
It's a great little service, man. And a lot of people are on it
already. I think it's the next big thing. That's what I say. So what is that? Oh, Boca Raton this
past weekend. The Black Box. Big shout out to the guy who owns it, Randy Singer.
Very few comedy club owners get it.
And it's not a club.
It's actually a little theater.
He set it up with theater seating so it goes up gradually, number one, which is killer.
Stage is huge.
Lights are perfect.
Sound is perfect.
Listen to this.
And I don't know how this worked, but he has audience members,
so there's no distractions. When they need a drink, they can text it to the bar.
And I didn't see a waitress the whole time. Somehow, the key to a killer comedy show is
no distractions. And this guy has figured out. Beautiful green room, treats you right.
And I'm telling all my comedy buddies, my contemporaries,
the Colin Quinns,
the David Tells,
the Billy,
well, Billy Burr is too big.
You got to play the black box in Boca Raton.
The audience is educated and it's not a bunch of young, dumb drunks,
no fucking bachelorette parties,
adults who actually have shirts on
with collars and shit.
Nobody's fighting over chicken fingers
and fucking ribs and
the jalapeno poppers or the judy judy gold bitter greens or the soupy sales chunky soup it is a
killer place so i'm telling i'm urging my comedy buddies to go down there guy gets it i don't know
how he did it but he gets it not to mention the beach is right there. I stayed at the Wyndham in Deerfield.
Step outside my room, three feet, there's the beach. You know me, I don't brag about road
gangs. I fucking hate them. I'd do this one again tomorrow because somebody gets it. That's all it
takes. Stand-up comedy, it's so easy. Some of these club owners just don't get it. This guy gets it.
And I'll tell you one guy who didn't get my comedy. There was a fucking lib. I forget which
night, Friday or Saturday, sitting right in the front. Here's a picture of him enjoying my set.
That's an actual picture taken by a buddy of mine, Al, who was sitting four feet from this
guy at a side table. This is what this guy did when I went into my politics. As you can see, the guy behind them looks like Roger Stone shitting his pants with
laughter. And then there's that liberal fuck stain, that tolerant liberal covering his ears.
Maybe he thought the sound was too loud. I don't know. But look at him in pain. And I had to
straighten another guy out. One of the shows, I said, Trump, I
absolutely love him. Everybody applauds, except this one jerk off. When the applaud died down,
he started booing. The guy was older than me. Boo. And I said, what do you mean boo? I said,
did you do your research before you came to the comedy club tonight? Do you know who your
headliner was? What he stands for? He goes, I thought you were funny. And I said, well,
I hear 200 other people laughing. It is his democracy.
So once again, you lib fucks are on the wrong side of history.
Didn't hear from him for the rest of the show.
Ripped him a new asshole, which he deserved.
Just an intolerant fuckstain with his arms crossed the whole show.
And I kept going back to him.
And he couldn't.
He can't defeat the truth.
Nobody can. Especially when it's in comedy couldn't. He can't defeat the truth. Nobody can.
Especially what's in, it's in comedy form.
Nothing's funnier than the truth.
He couldn't handle the goddamn truth, is what I told him.
I said it about eight times.
You can't handle the truth!
And he couldn't.
He couldn't fucking handle it.
Right up his gazoo.
And another lady walked out on Saturday night.
Second show, I think it was, which was my favorite show.
The last show of the weekend, I'm loose.
I'm loose.
The fucking, you know, the gears are well oiled.
I'm relaxed.
Fucking just letting it fly.
And the black box.
That's right, the black box.
that's right.
The black box.
Oh,
Robin,
uh, from Miami actually saw me,
uh,
at the,
uh,
at the black box.
Rob,
first of all,
thank you for taking the time to wash your filthy ass and come out to the
show.
Oh,
my pleasure,
Nick.
It's an honor and a pleasure to talk to you.
Same here,
buddy.
Yeah. I, I, I'm glad you actually enjoyed playing there
because I was mortified for the schmucks
that just didn't get you when we're sitting there.
The libtards on the left side, my right,
and I was just, you know, we were dying.
I took my son there, and we were loving it
the whole fucking show.
We were catty-cornered to the Doobie Brothers bassist with the Choccy Conn white. on there and we were loving it the whole fucking show and uh you know we were we were we were
catty corner to the doobie brothers bassist with the chocky con white oh the black yeah the black
woman with the huge tits and her musician boyfriend who i said to just the way he was
dressed i said hey the the fucking bass player from sticks is here and uh he kept yelling out
nancy pelosi but he was a huge fan i talked to him afterwards can i just give you guys a tip if you're a fan of mine or any other comedian don't yell shit out sit there and enjoy the
fucking show you don't help it you're not funny we appreciate you coming out but how do you not
know that especially if you well if you're a musician you don't know that because you can be
a keyboard player and nobody's going to yell out next you know, they don't get it. But go ahead, Rob.
But I was killing myself after the show
for not yelling out April showers,
like in one of those low points.
Yeah, don't do that.
No, and let me, Rob,
let me school you a little bit on comedy.
They're supposed to be low points.
It's a live performance.
It's not scripted.
It's so funny.
People come up and go, sorry for the audience.
And I'm like, what are you talking about?
They were fine.
If you're killing on every joke every night,
you're a crowd pleaser.
You're not a comic.
You don't stand for anything.
You're not showing your ugly side.
And you're not the real thing.
I happen to be the real thing.
So I laugh when people go, boy, they sucked. And
I'm like, no, I thought they were good. And then my next thought is, I mean, who are you going to
see when you didn't see me? You must've been seeing some real hacks because the fucking owner,
the owner goes after, he goes, I was laughing my ass. He goes, I, he goes, you're so different
than anybody else. And I'm like, what are you talking about? What am I doing that's different?
I'm doing set-up punchline, but I'm a white guy who's not ashamed to be white.
So I guess that's what's different.
It was the best.
Half the blue hair, did you see the Jane Fonda look-alike in the front row there?
What show was that?
That was the last show Saturday night.
She was sitting there. She didn't crack That was the last show Saturday night. She was sitting there.
She didn't crack a smile the whole show.
Her husband, I think he was a Roger Stone lookalike, too.
He was busting a gut.
Oh!
He sat there like mortified.
You know who that...
You know who you're talking about?
That guy that you said looked like Rod, he had white hair, right?
Yeah, yeah.
You know who that was?
That was my old hockey coach from high school, Danny Comeau.
And that was his wife.
His wife loved the show.
I hope that wasn't his wife.
Well, it was, but she wasn't.
She's a right winger, too.
She just didn't.
She was not one of those people.
But that's so funny you picked that out.
But he goes, I'm looking at him the whole show going,
how do I know this guy?
I played a year of JV hockey just to stay in shape for spring track.
And it was so funny.
I get suspended two games in for fighting.
I didn't know you couldn't fight in high school hockey.
Hey, Rob, thanks again, buddy.
I really appreciate you coming out to the show.
And I'm telling you, folks, I don't get excited about much.
But when you have 10, 15 people coming up going,
the podcast, the podcast, don't change what you're doing.
You're the only guy out there doing this.
Please, please.
Those are the compliments I'm getting now.
I'd never heard those my whole career.
And it makes me hard as a fucking shark's tooth.
And the fact that you guys, you know,
absolutely fucking love it makes it worthwhile.
So thank you guys for coming out.
I do that gig again in a second.
Let's get to the filthy left, the lying cocksuckers.
Excuse me, who don't believe in anything that's American.
They're very anti-American.
Let's start off with a representative from Minnesota, Democrat Ilhan Omar.
Anytime you vote in somebody who wears a hijab,
you're a fucking idiot.
Nick, that's racist.
No, it's not.
No, it's not.
Take off your silly bees hive off your head
and get with the program,
you fucking Jew hater.
Rep Ilhan Omar on Monday apologized
for anti-Semitic remarks in which she implied Republicans are being bribed into supporting Israel.
But ended her statement by taking a shot at AIPAC.
That's American-Israeli Public Affairs Committee.
Referring to its role in U.S. politics as problematic.
But your silly hat's not problematic?
You fucking...
Minnesota, wake up!
That was her when she won and was voted into Congress.
She caught a fucking handful of shit.
She says...
She comes back. she had to apologize she says anti-semitism is real yeah you keep it alive you beehive wearing dope you and i'm
grateful for jewish allies and colleagues sure you are who are educating me on the painful history
of anti-semitic tropes yeah i, I'm sure somebody named Ihan Omar,
who's wearing a hijab, has to be educated on the painful history of anti-Semitic tropes.
You are the history. Is that what she wore? Red, white, and blue? How dare you?
Somebody should look under that hat for a pipe bomb. Nick, that's ridiculous. I know,
but I said it anyways. My intention is, she says,
this is her tweet. We have the tweet, don't we, fellas?
Well, come on now. Not that one. The long one, Jace. No? I'll read it anyway. It doesn't matter.
She says, my intention is never to offend any constituents or Jewish Americans as a whole.
Sure.
We have to always be willing to step back and think through criticism.
Just as I expect people to hear me when others attack me for my identity.
This is why I unequivocally apologize.
This is the second time she's been called out in a couple weeks with anti-Semitic shit.
Because that's the Democrat Party.
Durka, Durka, Muhammad Jihad.
Haka Sherpa Sherpa.
A bacala.
At the same time, I reaffirm the problematic role of lobbyists in our politics,
which is true, whether it be AIPAC, the NRA, or the fossil fuel industry.
It's gone on too long, and we must be willing to address it,
said the woman who comes from a country where they'll hang you by your tits
if you show some ankle.
At the same time, I reaffirm the problematic role of lobbyists in our politics.
She says, earlier Monday, House Speaker Nancy Leather Nipples Pelosi
insisted that Omar immediately apologize for tweets
saying that the members of Congress are being paid by a powerful interest group to support Israel.
She was saying it's Jewish money is what she was saying.
I could see right through it, even with these glasses that are covered with jism bop, jism bop, jism bop, boo.
What?
Here's Pelosi's response.
Do you have this, Chase? I don't know.
That's not it either. I'll read the long form. There you go. I'll read it.
Anti-Semitism must be called out, confronted, and condemned whenever it is encountered without exception.
We are and will always be strong supporters of Israel in Congress because we understand that our support is based on shared values
and strategic interests.
Well, according to Omar, those values are cash.
Legitimate criticism of Israel's policies is protected by the values of free speech.
Oh, now she's for free speech, the leathery nipple whore, and democratic debate that the
United States and Israel share.
But Congresswoman Omar's use of anti-Semitic tropes and prejudicial
accusations about Israel's supporters is deeply offensive. It was so deeply offensive, I almost
douched. We condemn these remarks, and we call upon Congresswoman Omar to immediately apologize
for these hurtful comments, or I will fucking buggy whip her on my front lawn like they do in
her hometown. I added for emphasis.
As Democrats and as Americans, the entire Congress must be fully engaged
in denouncing and rejecting all forms of hatred, racism, prejudice,
and discrimination wherever they are encountered.
Why do you stop with Black Lives Matter and Antifa,
groups that you support, you fucking pig, you?
In our conversation, Pelosi says in a tweet,
Congresswoman Omar
and I agree that we must use this
moment to move forward as we
reject anti-Semitism in all
forms. Yeah, okay.
How about not electing
her, Minnesota? Minnesota, I love
you. Minneapolis is one of my favorite comedy
towns. Wake up and
smell the T tnt could you
you kebab eating hummus loving i love his i love middle eastern food by the way i
love it i had goat balls last night dipped in syrup mink you i love falafel yeah i know you do
and syrup. Mink ya.
I love falafel. Yeah, I know you do.
That was Ryan Pahota.
He loves falafel because you know what he loves? He doesn't love the taste.
It makes him feel like he's for diversity and shit.
Exactly.
Congresswoman Omar's
use of anti-Semitic tropes and
whatever. Okay, anyways the leader's remarks
came hours after a pair of powerful house chairman rebuked omar for anti-semitic tweets
of course they were jewish this is what kills me now the jews are getting up in a foreign affairs
committee chairman elliot engel of new york said he would not tolerate them and found it shocking
to hear a member of Congress invoke
the anti-Semitic trope of Jewish money. You find that shocking? You know why? Because you don't
know what's going on in your own party, Mr. Engel. Why does it have to be personal before you speak
out against something? He said he will emphasize to members of the panel of both parties the
American-Israeli relationship is important. You don't have to tell the Republicans the American-Israeli relationship is important.
Republicans have been behind it for years.
Tell your own party.
Quit the equivocation.
It just bums me out with the fucking jihad and the silly hat.
Durka, Durka, Muhammad Jihad.
Haka Sherpa Sherpa, a bakala.
In a separate statement, another Jewish fellow,
House Judiciary Committee Chairman Jared Nadler,
said Omar had failed a test of leadership.
It is deeply disappointing and disturbing to hear
your representative, Iman Omar's, choice of words
in her exchange with the journalist yesterday,
wherein she appears to traffic in old anti-Semitic tropes.
I thought a trope was a fish.
Oh, that's tripe.
No, a tripe is a cow's stomach.
I'm sorry.
About Jews and money, Nadler said.
And then he chewed on a bagel
and circumcised himself with a spork.
What?
Her words are deeply hurtful and offensive,
particularly as they
build on previous
comments she made
about Jews
that's right
couple weeks ago
a month ago
she said Jews
hypnotizing the world
in support of Israel
that's another old
trope he said
born of hate-filled
texts like the
protocols of the
elders of Zion
who won the
Orange Bowl
back in 1976
against
the University of
Oklahoma la la la la la la la la la 1976 against University of Oklahoma.
La, la, la, la, la, la.
La, la, la, la, la.
What do you expect when you square somebody in on the Koran?
What do you expect?
Are you really that fucking ignorant of how stupid you people are?
Travis in California would like to talk about Miss Omar
and her filthy ankles
Travis how are you fella
you take on Miss Omar
and her comments that are clearly anti-semitic
hey Nick how are you buddy
I'm fine
have you had the goat balls with the camel couscous
on the side it's really good
couscous I forgot about couscous I just want to know where is the out balls with the camel couscous on the side. It's really good. It's delicious. Couscous?
I forgot about couscous.
I just want to know where is the outcry from the left calling her a Nazi or kicking her off Twitter.
I don't understand.
By the way, I'm the guy that called in last week.
I know.
I know who you are.
That's why I had you back on.
And before you answer my question, can I get a shout out?
To who?
To my friend Gene. Gene? Can you just say hello, can I get a shout out to my friend Gene?
Gene?
Can you just say hello, Gene?
What is it?
Hello.
Yeah, Gene.
Oh, Dean.
Hello, Dean.
How are you?
Is that Dean Graber?
I just wanted to say $60 from the cameo.
But I'm still going to book it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
No, you make a great point, though.
You make a great point though you make a great point travis where where
is the outrage and and uh you know twitter did so i can't get on my twitter for a month now they did
something my password and they they fucked me over but it's a great point well where is the outrage
you know pelosi has to say something i've been wondering i didn't see you post on i haven't seen
you on twitter in a month yeah they yeah they i can't get on there they fucked up my password and
we've written 50 uh 50 emails and and uh and you call a number you get a recording and uh
so they they have it in for me which i wear as a badge of courage but uh you make a great point
that the hypocrisy that the
Miss Omar Khabisah or whatever her name is
she gets away with this
it's okay
of course she's a woman of color and she's wearing a silly hat
for the middle east and she has free reign
in this country
well it's time for things to change
you're god damn right Travis I'm with you
and thank you for calling back buddy
I got a whole line of calls here
you got it You're goddamn right, Travis. I'm with you. And thank you for calling back, buddy. I got a whole line of calls here. Thank you, Nick.
You got it.
Johnny in Chicago.
No, I'm not doing that yet.
Let's go to Daniel in New York who wants to weigh in on Durka Durka Bakala.
Daniel, what's going on?
Hey, Nick.
When these things happen, a lot of times people say,
well, you have racists on both sides.
Yeah.
But in this case, the Democrats elect them governor of Virginia and representatives from Michigan and Minnesota and wherever else.
You hit it right on the head.
It's not an isolated incident.
The Democrats are the party
that brought you slavery
and the Klan.
And if you,
what was the movie
I once saw earlier, fellas?
The Death of a Nation.
Dinesh D'Souza.
Go see that
and you'll get a history
on the Democrat Party
and how they are the original party
of racists.
And you're absolutely right.
It's ridiculous.
Between her and, I mean, you've got Northam with his black face.
Then you've got the black guy, Lieutenant Governor, who's being charged with two sexual assaults.
And then you've got another Attorney General wore a black face.
And this is the Democrat Party finally showing its face.
It happens to be black.
Yeah, well, just wanted to say that.
You got it, Daniel. Good call, buddy.
Excellent point.
Excuse me.
Let's go to Garrett in Louisville,
Kentucky. There's a state that might know something
about anti-Semitism.
I'm going to throw that out there.
Garrett, what's up?
What's your take on this?
No, sir, that is a lie.
But great to talk to you, Nick.
I'm a huge fan.
Thanks, Garrett.
Yeah, Louisville actually has a pretty large Jewish community, but it's more the upper crust part of the population. But what I wanted to talk to you about is something that a lot of people don't really realize about this representative
in Minnesota is she's been elected because a large population of these Muslims have moved
into that area and have elected her, right? Isn't that a little scary that they've grown such a
large population that they can now elect leaders to support and further their own agenda?
I know what you're talking about.
You're talking about the Somalis in Minneapolis.
And I used to do a joke about,
I wouldn't go to the mall called the Mall of America
with 11 Somalis living a foot away.
No way I'm getting on that Ferris wheel.
But there's not enough of them to vote her.
It's white liberals, Garrett.
Let's keep the fucking target where it belongs.
They're the ones who would elect somebody like this. They elected Al Franken. Minnesota has a
history of stupidity. But yeah, you make a good point. I always bring it up when I, you know,
go ahead. I think they said her district is like 740,000 people and she got elected with about
65,000 votes. And that district that I think she's in includes Minneapolis, which I know has said um her district is like 740 some thousand people and she got elected with about 65 000 votes
and that district that i think she's in it includes minneapolis which i know it's got a big
pie it's just a little bit it's a little strange and it's a little i'd say it's a little scary
considering that particular sect is a little bit in conflict with our american ideals in my opinion
you got it's not your opinion that's a fact garrett i appreciate the call great point it's
true i used to say on stage i go if you're muslim i was in a cab in new york city and this guy and girl young guy and girl
were making out on the hood of a car he was i was going to the comedy cellar and this muslim
fucking why why'd they have to do that in public why do they why did i go fucking why not
this is america that's why even though i hate when i
see people make it out in public i want to punch them in the head but i'm just saying why would
you come here i i laughed my balls off every time i see like an ad for remember that ad with uh
paris hilton eating a cheeseburger and a fucking panties or whatever. And I go, why, if you're a Muslim, would you come to this country where, you know, we have
shit like that?
And I mean, it goes against everything you believe in.
Why would you move here?
Makes me kind of wonder.
I raise an eyebrow.
What are they doing here?
And then I see these Middle Eastern guys pushing hot dog carts in New York.
I'm like, oh, yeah, they came here to sell hot dogs the rest of their lives.
So I bit one. Sure enough, it exploded right in my mouth. I'm like, oh yeah, they came here to sell hot dogs the rest of their lives. So I bit one.
Sure enough, it exploded right in my mouth.
An explosion of flavor.
Tasted like Yemen.
But that's a great point.
I mean, all the values of the United States
are directly, directly,
they directly oppose in the Middle East.
But a lot of them are phonies.
Remember 9-11, those guys?
Where were they the night before the attack?
At a titty bar.
They were at a titty bar.
Am I right?
I am right.
You know how I know that?
They found like $6,001 bills in the cockpit of the plane.
And a ping pong ball.
What?
You are correct, sir!
Let's move on, shall we?
I feel good, man.
I took some of that CBD shit.
Two eye drops.
They say, you know, put it under your tongue.
Right down the gullet.
Two of them. And I only made it through half an episode. know, put it on your tongue. Right down the gullet. Two of them.
And I only made it through half an episode of Leave it to Beaver.
I don't know if it was the
shitty plot or the CBD that knocked me
silly, you know.
But let's get on
to how stupid a country we're turning
into. This absolutely
disgusts me.
Oh, did this piss me off.
Purple Heart triple amputee
vet Brian Colfage
underwent
an invasive TSA pat-down
at Tucson International
Airport on the
morning after the We Build the Wall
town hall meeting.
Can you imagine? He's missing his
limbs, and they're patting this motherfucker down
like he's dressed like Congressman Omar.
If I could, I'd grab this microphone
and I'd beat your brains out with it
because that's what you deserve.
That's what you deserve.
A TSA agent groped and searched
under Brian Colfage's hips, buttocks, groin,
and his half arm,
searching for what exactly? His hand? How fucking dare you? In addition to groping, buttocks, groin, and his half arm. Searching for what exactly?
His hand?
How fucking dare you?
In addition to groping coverage,
agents also swabbed his prosthetic legs
and wheelchairs for exposure.
Here's the video that should infuriate you.
This is a guy that lost his limbs
fighting for this country,
and look at the useful idiot doing his job.
Stupid fuck. Meanwhile, there's a guy behind them in line on a camel holding a fucking belt made of grenades. Look at this. Look at this.
And look at him just being a good soldier. Should have clubbed that guy with that fucking right hand.
just being a good soldier.
Should have clubbed that guy with that fucking right hand.
How disgusting.
That's political correctness run amok.
I took a picture and put it on Twitter
about a year ago of a woman
when I went to LA to do Rogan's
a year, year and a half ago.
This is like a nine-year-old white woman.
They have her doing this
and they're fucking frisking her.
Meanwhile, there was like three people behind
who looked like Muhammad Atta's cousins.
Come on in.
You fucking people on the left make me ill.
Can you imagine?
That's a disgrace.
That should be used.
That's the prototype for how far we've fallen,
this clip, as far as political correctness goes
god what an insult imagine and that little useful idiot's just doing his job wants his paycheck no
they're ignorant that's ignorant yeah it is tucson's metro core is extremely liberal
and for open borders surprise surprise hill surprise. Hillary Clinton won Tucson in
2016. Radical open borders groups such as La Raza, that's Spanish for the race, have infected Tucson
along with Eagle alien invaders, yet a triple amputee veteran who served this country is
groped and humiliated. Naturally. This is why I could never
vote on the other side. I don't know how you people, when you're going to wake the fuck up.
A concerned bystander. By the way, we all know the TSA. That's kabuki theater. You know damn well
it's all for show to make you feel safer. Well, how do you know that, Nick? Well, how do I know
it? Because every year, and I've mentioned this on the show before they the the uh
the feds department of justice fbi they test these airports and the tsa they try to sneak you know
fake guns in and shit 98 failure rate 98 or 99 it might be even shortcoming okay so so and i and i
always think that when i'm going through as I'm flying. I'm like, okay.
But can you imagine, can you imagine checking his prosthetic leg?
How about going, how'd you lose your limbs fighting for this country?
Okay, sir, you know what?
I'm going to carry you to your seat.
How about that?
Jesus H.
Yeah, so fucking a concerned bystander caught the groping on video
and told the getaway pundit that an observer was so disgusted
by what the TSA agent was doing to Mr. Kolfage
that they had to walk away due to disgust and anger
at seeing a war hero subjected to such embarrassment.
Don't walk away.
Don't get in his face.
Film yourself giving the TSA
and don't give me this shit
while he's just doing his job.
Yes, like fucking Hitler's henchmen.
They were just doing their jobs.
Get in his face.
Make a scene.
Maybe you'll go viral.
Then you'll be a hero.
I got into it with a woman on a plane
because she was playing her music loud
on the way home.
I'm not saying this compares to that.
She's blasting her fucking music.
All of a sudden, my row, the row behind me,
we're all looking, go, what the, where's that come?
So I got up and I go, do you mind turning that down?
And she glared at me and I go, what the fuck?
She goes, did you just swear?
And I go, yeah, I did.
Call the cops.
That's a line from Uncle Junior and the Sopranos when he was leaving the hospital.
They said he had to be in a wheelchair and he wouldn't sit down.
He said, call the cops.
Oh, God.
Mr. Kolfage told the Gateway Pundit, it's unfortunate.
Listen how classy the guy is.
That every time I travel, every time he says I travel, I get a full search and swabbed for explosives.
Every time?
How stupid are you, TSA?
Or are you making a point that this guy's the real problem?
Meanwhile, me, you should see me.
If I don't shave, I look like a fucking, I look like a poster boy for terrorism.
Nobody checks my shit.
It's the times he says that we live in.
I understand the security concerns, but it's not TSA's fault, he says.
It's the policymakers in D.C., which is true, who have no clue what the real world is like.
It's a joke.
It's the same people who think there's no issue at our border.
Amen.
Oh, by the way, before I forget, Roger Stone has a, because he's broke
and they're milking him for money with lawsuits and he's got to hire lawyers and spend 50, 60
grand a month. You guys, I want you to pull this up. I think it's, it's, I think it's rogerstonedefense.com
or just stone. Please pull it up because we have to donate to Roger.
I'm going to try to get a hold of him since he's a fan of the show.
Only reason I haven't is he's been over these stories a million times with the FBI raiding his home and shit.
I don't want to talk about it anymore, but maybe he does before the gag order.
Anyways, Mr. Colfaget goes on to say,
it's amazing how our government is so worried about airport security
with a triple amputee veteran in a wheelchair,
but every day thousands of illegals coming into our nation unchecked
and killing Americans.
And who's that on?
What party?
I want you to sit and connect the fucking explosive dots.
What party is for that?
I guess they turn a blind eye to them,
since most of them are missing an eye,
like they have to all the Angel families, Kolfage added.
He also added the policy of TSA is so bad, they've caused a charity to be formed
for wounded vets to fly on private planes,
so we don't have to deal with the full cavity searches and removing of prosthetics.
That's why I usually fly Veterans Airlift Command, he says.
And I'll give out that website.
It's www.veteransairlift.org.
Slash.
Brian Colfage set up a GoFundMe page to build a border wall,
and it has surpassed $20 million in donations with over 350,000 donors.
Is that the one we donated to? I don't know.
We donated to one of them. So not only has this guy gave up his limbs, he's already raised
20 million to build the wall. But where's his credibility? What would he know about safety
and security? Right? Mrs. Pelosi, you're going to meet with him? Do you have ramps to your office?
Sickening.
Makes me ill, should make you ill too.
So we found the Roger Stone page.
Go ahead.
Can you put that up there?
It is whoframedrogerstone.com.
No, no.
That's one of them. that's not the one he plugs
this was the other one yeah no that's not it either it's roger it's roger stone um
rogerstonedefense.com or something like that or stonedefense.com. But either way, help them out.
There are a couple of GoFundMe set up too for them.
Okay, well, whatever.
You guys get the idea.
Mike in Miami says he's a Border Patrol agent for 16 years.
I can ask him whatever the fuck I want about the border.
How do your peers not understand they're getting eaten by themselves?
That's a great question.
How you doing, Mike?
Welcome to the show, and thanks for patrolling the border.
Somebody has to do the dirty work.
Are you still an agent?
Are you retired?
Hey, Nick.
Yeah, I am, man.
And I love you, and I love your fucking podcast man thank you
well we love you guys for what you do i don't know how you can
keep you cool and uh which border are you on the southern border mike
i did six years uh down south i did 10 up north, and now I'm coastal. Ah.
And tell the people
that Trump's not exaggerating
the problem. You can just see by the
numbers he's not exaggerating the problem.
And what
did you confront there? What are the biggest problems
at the border, Mike?
Well, right now
the biggest problem is uh they uh well it's kind of complex but you know when
when you run out of jail space the word especially in 2019 2018 it spreads like fucking wildfire right so when they know that they're you know if you're
colombian and have kids and we don't have jail space for that they know they're going to get
released and get papers to you know move on past the fucking danger zone, quote unquote.
Right.
And so, you know, I mean, if you got walking papers with a notice to appear in court in 30 days, I mean, all you need is those papers to get through the checkpoints and everything else.
Because there's no immigration working in Topeka, Kansas.
Right, right.
You get what I'm saying?
You get what I'm saying?
Yeah.
So, you know, that's the biggest problem is the inability to just go, well, fuck you.
You're not coming across.
You're going back.
You know, and to actually have to process them and give them those papers is
the biggest uh heartburn and it's not unique to 2019 to happen under bush and everything yes
absolutely both parties are guilty uh you know they they want a lot of them both parties want
cheap labor the democrats want the future votes excuse. And, yeah, it's just unbelievable to me.
You know what kills me, Mike, that we can't even bring up using lethal force to defend the boy.
Imagine if somebody said, you know, we have guns.
And I say it on stage.
I go, why do we need a wall?
We have tanks and the biggest military ever.
And people laugh nervously.
But it's not
even it's not even an option well yeah right you don't have to kill them just well i mean can't
you tase them i mean when they're throwing rocks at you can't can't you tase them that's i don't
want you to kill them you know you're gonna run out of paper you going to run out of taser cartridges pretty quick, you know.
Okay.
But, you know, the ability to stop them right there and say, hey, go back.
And, you know, Trump was way ahead of it on this.
Yes.
He said flat out he wanted to do away with the asylum bullshit.
And it got shot down by the Ninth Circuit.
And, you know, it's fucking high school man the word spreads all the way down south and they're like hey time to get while
the getting's good yeah you know here they are bum rock border and what uh you got these immigrant
rights groups yeah i'm sorry go ahead yeah mean, they're met right at the border by
these
lawyer, immigrant activist
lawyers who instruct them to
they tell them what to say
and like you said, they get a desk ticket
and it's supposed to appear monthly and they disappear
into the
it just, what do you think's going to happen?
Because they're
talking about another possible shutdown which I don't think, is is going to happen? Because they're talking about another possible shutdown, which I don't think...
Is Trump going to declare a national emergency this week?
I don't know, man.
I don't know what he's going to do.
I love the fucking guy.
That's what's great about him.
Everybody in the boardroom will love that guy, by the way, just so you know.
Yeah.
That's not a lie.
That's a fact.
And they should.
Yeah.
So we don't know.
And, you know, sucking dick under the viaduct, you know, to pay for gas sucks for a few weeks but
if it's in the uh if it's in the name of the united states i'm down man there you go i don't
give a fuck you know you're literally down mike thanks a lot man and and thanks for you how go
ahead go ahead i'm sorry i was gonna ask oh how was boca i wanted to make it up there but they
they changed my days off i had a fucking i had a fucking work man I'm down here in
Florida I was gonna I want to go see you in Boca but I'll be back I loved it
they're the I bragged about over the first five minutes of the show today
it's a killer place and the guy runs it beautifully so I will catch you next
time I'm down there thanks for the call Mike appreciate your service buddy his ray in New York he's a TSA agent this is this is great we can hear
from from an actual guy working there ray what's going on
this is the water i had a feeling what did he say it doesn't matter says said something about your panties
and he wants them in his freezer i don't know uh let's move on to some more um uh
proof of the democrat Party being just,
as the guy I used to call my show, don't even remember his name.
He was really smart.
He used to refer to them as a criminal enterprise,
also known as the Democrat Party.
U.S. Marine Corps, this is from December, okay?
But it's relevant because something just happened with the story.
U.S. Marine Corps Reservists Alejandro Garnidez and Luis Torres testified Thursday against
suspects Thomas Massey and Tom Keenan, who were allegedly part of a larger group of left-wing
Antifa activists who began beating the Marines, these guys the Marines, after mistaking them
for participants.
I doubt if they mistake them, for participants in November, We the People rally in Old City.
The two alleged Antifa activists were ordered to stand trial just after Christmas, that's
what I'm going to get onto, on aggravated assault and conspiracy charges.
The two Marines testified they were in Philly to attend a Marine event at a local hotel
and were touring attractions around the city when they were approached by Kenan, who allegedly asked the men if they were Proud Boys, an allusion to one of the right-wing groups behind the November 17th rally.
Torres said he didn't know what proud boys meant. It was after that interaction, Godnez said that Kanan and Massey
and approximately 10 other fucking cowards,
men and women,
I would love for a woman to approach me in a mask
and try to get rough with me.
I'd pay for that, actually.
Take off my pantalones.
Some were masked and some were unmasked.
Began attacking the Marines, punching and kicking them,
using mace and hurling slurs and other insults.
So those are the two Marines.
So there's two stories right there.
Those are the Antifa guys.
I mean, those are the Antifa guys.
I'm sorry.
Fuck, how could I call them?
Look at John Candy on the left with black hair.
And then the other guy with his fucking unibrow. Look at these
meatheads.
Couldn't
fucking
Anyways.
So yeah.
So they started kicking and beating the
shit out of these guys.
Began
attacking and using Mason
and ethnic hurling slurs,
which, by the way, when white guys do that, that's an automatic hate crime.
You know that, don't you?
I've just had it with these fucking people, honest to God.
Fucking queers!
Godden has testified he was bewildered by being called a white supremacist,
and he reportedly yelled out, I'm Mexican!
But he said that didn't deter his attackers,
who then started yelling ethnic slurs as well.
He said, the best way I can describe it is the sound of people chanting
in a soccer stadium, he told the court,
adding Kenan was laughing, smiling, that's one of the assailants,
and having a good time.
Well, I could have died that day.
The two Marines said they were taken to Jefferson Hospital
after calling 911.
Gardner said he was sprayed with mace at least six times,
hit in the head and kicked in the ribs.
Torres did not receive treatment at the hospital.
But Keenan's attorney was mildly rebuked
after referring to the incident as a tussle,
leading to the judge to reply,
this isn't like kids at a playground.
Finally, a judge who gets it.
A felony charge of ethnic intimidation.
Ethnic intimidation?
How about a hate crime?
What the fuck is ethnic intimidation?
Was added against Kenan
for allegedly yelling ethnic slurs.
That's a fucking hate crime, by the way,
if you're white.
And that's a fact.
The two men also face a host of
misdemeanor charges. Also, that's a misdemeanor
now, when you surround somebody in a group.
Hey, did you touch my sound?
Yeah, you were
just getting kind of really loud, and it was
popping, so I brought it down a little for a second.
Yeah, don't do that, unless they tell you
to. Popping where?
Like, maxing out.
Ah, for the love of Christ all right again don't ever do that I'll tan your ass but if it's popping I guess anyways to forward that to advance the story do we have
pictures of the Antifa activists facing assault charges why am I doing this? Ryan, I want to back up.
I don't want to have to do this.
Put it back up.
It can pop a little.
They were right there.
Thank you.
I'll stay off the mic.
It says Joseph Alcoff.
Do we have pictures of this?
That's the guy.
Yeah, there he is um it says uh what a difference a year made for joseph
alcott there's a picture of him uh between maxine waters and senator uh sherrod brown of ohio um on
monday the 37 year old has a court date in connection with charges he's facing in philadelphia
that include aggravated assault and ethnic intimidation for allegedly being part of an antifa mob in november
that attacked two marines that i just mentioned elkoff and two others charged in the attack have
pleaded not guilty these pieces of garbage you listening your mother sucks big elephant
dicks you You got that?
But while the Democratic officials are distancing themselves from Alcoff now,
until recently he was a well-connected, aspiring political player in Washington
who may have even had a hand in key policy proposals.
Listen to this.
What more do you need to know about the Democrat Party?
His endorsement apparently mattered when several congressional Democrats in February 2018 issued press releases with his quote backing their bill on regulating payday
lenders. As the payday campaign manager for the liberal group Americans for Financial Reform,
Alcoff participated in congressional Democrat press conferences. So he's not a guy just on
the fringe. He's on the inside, too.
Was a guest on a House Democrat podcast
and met with senior officials
at the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau,
that's a CFPB,
from 2016 through 2018.
He's also pictured
with now House Financial Services Committee chairwoman,
the ignorant, low IQ,
fucking dope Maxine Waters.
In ranking Democrat on the Senate Banking, Housing and Urban Affairs Committee,
Senator Sherrod Brown of Ohio, another fucking brainless wonder.
Both committees oversee financial regulatory policies.
Alcoff was advocating.
What more do you need to know?
Connect the dots.
But it's the Trump supporters who are the violent ones, right?
Elkoff met with the then CFPB director Richard Cordray
and other senior officials on April 2016.
Again on March 2017.
And a third time in May 2017.
During this time, he reportedly was an Antifa leader in Washington.
So there's your Democrat Party.
And he was also the organizer, Alcoff was, of Smash Racism D.C.
Remember them?
They're the ones, that's the group that chased out Ted Cruz and his wife out of a restaurant.
They surrounded Tucker Carlson's house.
You know, those people, those tolerant people, those fascist pieces of garbage.
And this is who Maxine Waters hangs out with. And it goes on and on. I don't want to fucking bore you.
But there he is. This is the thing. Let me ask you a question, Mr. Alcoff and other Antifa members.
If you're on the right side, supposedly they're anti-fascist. That's what it stands for.
They're against racism. If that's true and you're for stuff like that, why do you wear a mask?
Why do you have to wear a ski mask when you're doing your job? If you're really against that
shit. Oh, that's right, because you're violent. And you're violent, why? Because you're losing
in the fucking arena of ideas. If you're really doing anti-racist work,
you have to wear
a ski mask.
Did MLK Jr. wear one?
Should have had
a bulletproof one,
but I'm just saying.
Look at that jerk-off.
Like to surround his house.
Probably lives in a lean-to
with two indians
anyways
that's who uh maxine waters uh listens to and and sherrod uh brown and other democrats that's uh
that's where they want to take us.
Speaking of racism, we need to lighten it up a little bit here.
Here's a commercial that apparently, very controversial.
The Chinese, as we know, you can't trust them as far as you can throw them.
That's horrible.
I'm kidding.
I hope the people at the Golden Goose, where I order my Chinese food on Friday and are not watching the show,
are they going to take a dump in my mushy pork?
Did you say shrimp with a brown side there?
Check out this commercial. Nelly, our buddy Nelly in Philly sent us this. Oh!
This guy's considered good looking in China.
Every time I see this guy, he's on a bike with a basket on it.
Bringing me shrimp.
What's so controversial?
Most people separate colors when they're doing the wash.
I mean, come on, folks.
That was a good-looking black dude.
And is that, again, in a perfect world?
Why would that be controversial anywhere?
It's kind of funny.
I mean, they hired a black actor
he was much better looking and more of a guy than that chinese kid that popped up
wasn't he jace i'm just wondering what he was doing in china who the black dude oh you know
what he's doing in china he's uh somebody come up with something quick he likes ribs i don't know
what was he doing what are you saying there's no black people in china jace i'm just saying in China. He's, uh, somebody come up with something quick. He likes ribs. I don't know.
What was he doing in China?
What are you saying?
There's no black people in China, Jason?
I'm just saying
it was kind of conspicuous.
I don't know about that.
I, uh,
you know,
there's a good rap scene
over there.
Remember we did a,
we did a story
a few months ago
about a rap scene in China.
Yeah, maybe he's just
a big Wu-Tang Clan fan.
A Wu-Tang Clan fan.
And, uh, but I'm just saying
is that that fucking over here
that would be controversial oh my god
look what they did
it's not like he was caught in the
in the uh what's that
filter you have in a dryer
the lint filter
yeah the lint filter
ah
why is that a big deal?
Why are we so sensitive to black needs all over the planet?
We've exported our PC horseshit.
China apparently like, fuck that, we do what we want.
She put them in the wash.
Joe Biden said, I know that black guy.
He's articulate, he's clean after three rent cycles.
I found it kind of amusing.
And I was more Chinese than the girl, by the way.
She had one eighth of a, just a touch of slant.
I had a friend.
He had a black mom, white dad.
And one time his mother said to him,
you know, he was doing something bad.
And he said, boy, I'm going to smack the black right off you.
Who said that?
My friend's mother.
She had a black, he had a black mom and a white dad.
Oh, the mother said that?
Yeah.
I love black moms.
I love, they fucking, I had a bit about it
on one of my specials.
I can't remember which one.
But I was on the subway in New York and they talk a little different. they fucking i had a bit about it on one of my specials can't remember which one uh but i was
on the subway in new york and they talk a little different they got on and she had a stroller a
little black kid i was on the subway he kept trying to grab this woman's scarper and and
the mother goes the kid must have been maybe three years old i will knock you the fuck out
i will knock you the fuck out i don't remember Mrs. Brady saying that to Cindy
you and your stupid lisp I will knock you the fuck out bitch
uh if I could only remember the bit it's much better than that
always good to undersell one of your bits but um I mean how is this that's controversial
I guess anything involving black people in another
race is controversial i don't know by the way in new york they don't get along too good i mean
i've been in chinese restaurants you know where you're going to pick up your foot and they're
always there's a confrontation and um again not not, not all the time.
I'm sure some of them get along beautifully,
but I thought it was kind of a cute commercial.
Please come to China.
She said no.
Boy, why don't you come home to me?
It's Kevin in Chicago.
Wants to talk about Antifa, but I'm
really guessing he doesn't. He's going to throw
some anti-Semitic horse shit like he always does.
Hi, Kevin. How are you?
Shalom. What's up?
I'm going to leave that to the side today.
I do want to talk about Antifa.
I got a couple points to make.
Yeah, Antifa.
They've been running rampant.
Nobody calls them out.
I mean, I've been hearing that once a day at least, once every two days.
It's something about, oh, Charlottesville this and Nazis, white supremacists, blah, blah, blah.
But communism kills millions, hundreds of millions of people.
That's a deadly ideology. Nobody calls him out. Everybody gives him a pass. And he got people directing traffic
in Portland, stuff like that. That's my first point. I did want to talk about your appearance
on Joe Rogan real quick, because I like how you raised your voice a little bit, and Joe Rogan got all triggered.
He got all like, oh my gosh.
He was scared.
He's not used to someone with a little bit of testosterone challenging him a little bit.
Going along with the plan, going along with the script.
And then you got his little assistant over there, Jamie Vernon, that freaking weasel,
bringing up articles from the Independence that's linked to the Washington Post.
It's like, do not deal with the mainstream media.
They're corrupt as it gets.
Nobody trusts the mainstream media,
and you're pulling up freaking articles from websites like that.
I just got to know, has Joe Rogan always been a fairy?
Has he always been kind of like a switch hitter?
No.
Because when I get that, he gives me that feeling.
He gives me that feeling he gives me something
that it plays for both sides no way and i'm not gonna bad mouth joe i i get excited i i was
surprised at his reaction but but that's what that's like that's what they do like the left
when you're arguing with somebody um even if i'm making a good point a legitimate point and they
this uh thanks for the call kevin i'll address it address it. They, you know, even at the comedy cell at the table, they're like, especially if you're
smoking them, you know, which wasn't the case with Joe, but they'll lower their voice.
And, you know, it's like when you're fighting your wife, she goes, why are you yelling at
me?
And I say to my wife, because I can't hit you, which is probably true of Joe.
I wouldn't try to hit him.
But it's a little trick they do.
They're like, why are you getting so excited in other words that
makes me wrong or whatever but when i said the coffee that wasn't a joke i had drank five cups
of coffee in about 28 minutes and it was delicious i couldn't fuck and i get that but i'm not afraid
of i like that i mean i and so does joe come on. He's a fucking UFC guy. But yeah, that's what happens.
They usually go, why are you getting excited?
You must be losing the argument.
But I'm an excitable guy.
And I wish I could fucking not get emotional.
But, you know, it's when somebody's saying black is white and white is black, I get fucking nuts.
I get nuts.
But Rogan, Rogan's a fucking, we need his testosterone.
I've said that before.
Fucking guy exudes testosterone.
I mean, how many guys have a million dollar gym right next to it as a Porsche
and right next to that is a walk-in freezer filled with elk and deer that he killed himself with his bare hands.
So no. Isn't he literally taking hormone replacement that he killed himself with his bare hands. So no.
Isn't he literally taking hormone replacement that he offered to you?
Yeah.
To have more testosterone?
I guess so.
He never looked more jacked.
His arms are fucking huge.
Yes, I'm looking into the testosterone.
You know, boxers workout can only go so far.
By the way, I got on the scale today and I was 214 which for me I like to stay around 205 but when I was down in Boca
you know you get a few drinks in you and you walk players a pizza place and you're
like mmm it affects your decision-making anyways what else is going on here what
else we got?
College in Massachusetts votes to keep police officers unarmed, unarmed on campus.
Come on.
You got to grow up.
Fucking Massachusetts, what is wrong with you?
The vote came last week in the, it says, and the drew the ire.
Who writes this shit?
Scott Eisen.
Oh, that's the picture.
I'm sorry.
And drew the ire of mass art police.
Never heard of this school.
Mass art. Police Sergeant Matt Hurley, who said the MassArt community has been done a disservice as it has presented a false sense of security.
And of course, that's exactly right.
You are correct, sir.
The Boston Herald quoted Hurley, who suggested a police force that is unarmed as a police force without the power to protect students.
You don't say.
He said parents have an expectation
that when they send their child
off to school at MassArt,
that since there is a police department there,
or the police department,
because it's Mass,
they have nothing to worry about.
That is just wrong, he says.
Hurley pointed out that
while officers are denied guns,
they are all fitted with Kevlar vests. In other words, while officers cannot shoot
at would-be school attackers, they are dressed in a fashion that anticipates an attack. Exactly.
Why would you? You got to wear your Kevlar vest.
why would you,
you got to wear your Kevlar vest,
you can't have guns,
but in case somebody shoots at you,
were they going to block them with karate moves,
you fucking,
Jesus,
the higher education, is the most retarded,
retarded fucking thing in this country,
and I'll say this again for you people.
I'm probably, I know, I'm getting loud.
I'll say it again.
Like the Parkland shoot in Florida.
And people don't want the teacher to have guns.
That'll lead to more.
So let me, and this is,
just ask this every time I have this debate, go.
Okay, so let's say one of your kids was in that class.
You're saying you'd rather have the teacher in there with your kids
when somebody breaks in to shoot it up not armed
as opposed to a teacher with a gun.
Please explain that logic to me.
Please, you titless, motherless fucks.
Please.
Pose that question every time.
So if you were in the, or you're at the mall and a shooting breaks out,
a mass shooting at a department store,
you'd rather be there with nobody has a gun.
That's my question to you.
Oh, but the teacher might accidentally shoot the student.
The only thing I'm worried about is a kid in the, like, jumping up on his teacher's legs like,
I need a thing, and then just hits the gun and it pops off.
Yeah, that sounds like a real scenario.
From that hip holster?
First of all, you don't have it on your hip.
Put it in the drawer next to your bottle of whiskey.
As far as the kindergartner, you hold him up as a fucking human shield.
Those kids get into everything, though.
Fuck those kids.
Again, if it was your kid, though, Ryan,
you'd rather have the teacher armed,
would you not?
I'd like to have a few security guards armed.
Walking through the school.
Okay, but the guy kills the security guards in the hallway.
Now what do you do?
Well, they have guns. They shouldn't be getting school. Okay, but the guy kills the security guards in the hallway. Now what do you do? Well, they have guns.
They shouldn't be getting killed.
Well, okay, but they argue against that too.
Well, that's a problem.
Well, that's the story we're doing.
You can't have guns on the campus.
That's lame.
Well, that's left-wing thinking.
By the time I'm done with you, you'll see the fucking light.
I'm telling you.
Oh, my aching stem.
Okay, give him bow and arrows.
I don't know.
The college, by the way,
is the Massachusetts College of Art and Design,
shortened to MassArt.
That's right.
Should be shortened to fucking...
Somebody come up with something funny.
AssArt.
AssArt, exactly, because that's who goes there these kids love their ass art i again guys i think you're turning me down
again did you turn it up a little i don't want to hunch over la la la yeah leave it there. I'll stay back. I have this argument on stage. I have it here.
I've got to be able to hear myself.
If it pops a little, tough shit.
Anyhow.
I got some super chats for you.
Let's have some super chats, shall we?
Northern Jackalope says,
Nick, can I get a We'll Do It Live, please?
We'll do it live.
Okay.
We'll do it live!
Fuck it!
Do it live!
I'll write it, and we'll do it live!
Fucking thing sucks!
fucking thing sucks yes sir next
then we got Joshua Breeshers who says
sorry I can't afford much but I love your show Nick
why do you have to read it like you're on coke
slow it down can't afford what
sorry can't afford much
but love your show
nick oh so you watch the free one that's all right just spread the word that's word of mouth
we had a guy on patreon uh somewhere maybe youtuber i i don't know but he told like 17
of his friends he's got listing that is invaluable to me that's why i get excited after showing
people like everybody from 20 year old girlsold girls to 60-year-old men
saying that they love the show.
And we're going to break big someday.
I'll be in my late 70s in a diaper here doing the show.
Anything else, Ryan?
That will be all.
All right.
Well, I need the cash, so super chat, motherfuckers.
I need it.
Look at this shirt.
It's a beautiful shirt.
Still liking the jacket tone.
I've been holding a pee for about an hour now.
I have the prostate of Hyman Roth.
I'm a Jew living in a pension in the twilight of his life.
I came to America to make cash.
pension in the twilight of his life i came to america to make cash
listen to this mass art president david i take it in the mouth nelson argued that changing school policy to arm offices is unnecessary nelson said to be, our current policy is that officers remain unarmed.
And that remains my position.
Your position is bent over a table as your life partner, Kevin, unloads and uses your ass as a fucking punching bag. Okay?
That's our policy.
They remain unarmed.
And that remains my position today.
Can you back it up with some logic?
No, I don't have to.
Listen to this.
The stupidity is continuing.
January 27th, 28th, 2019,
the Baltimore City School Board voted
to keep officers unarmed on its campuses as well.
Police officers are still,
still be allowed to carry their weapons
outside Baltimore schools
prior to the start of classes
and after classes. Just
not in between when you need the guns.
So you're admitting
it's so dangerous around that
the guns are needed before and after class.
Think about that for a second, you left
wing guzzlers
of jizz and bop.
But they must
disarm before entering school buildings.
So, let me get
this straight. Baltimore
cop, you're outside of school
like in Parkland, you hear shooting inside.
Oh, let me put my gun down
and run in there. Think about
that for a second. You wonder why
Baltimore is the shithole that
it is. Because it's run by liberal idiots with that type a second. You wonder why Baltimore is the shithole that it is. Because it's run
by liberal idiots
with that type of logic.
So there's shooting going on in the
school. Put your gun down and run
in there.
And when it's over, you can pick it back up again.
Just let that
seep in to your fucking
idiot libskulls.
I've had it.
I mean, Jesus H. Christ.
Please come to Baltimore, she said no.
I was going to do this story, Google and Facebook,
worsen media bias, but...
We already know that, don't we?
Huh?
I don't know.
Maybe I'll save it for tomorrow.
It's the same shit, though.
It goes into a little more detail.
But finally tonight, a cartoonist is fired for curse. Eagle staff writer.
A sharp-eyed butler eagle reader,
I think it's in Pennsylvania,
alerted the newspaper
of what appears to be
a vulgar shot at President Trump
in the February 10th Sunday cartoon section.
It will cost the cartoonist his place
in the Eagles Sunday comics. Oh, God,
that's that's fucking horrible. You're fired. You're fired. You're fired. You're fired. You're
fired. You're fired. You're fired. You're fired. You're fired. Shut up. The seemingly vulgar
sentiment, which appears to begin with we fondly say go fuck yourself
Can be scribbled in the bottom right corner of the middle panel in a non sequitur by a cartoonist Wiley Miller
What a piece of garbage this guy is you smug cocksucker fuck you
The three panel black and white cartoon encourages readers to color in the panels
Which this week featured a bear Renaissance character named Leonardo Leonardo Bear Vinci. Oh, that's so clever. You're such a genius,
you dummy, you. A reader brought to our attention that one of the syndicated comic strips,
which appears in the Sunday Butler Eagle, may contain a hidden message, which was apparently
placed there by someone in the creative department of the creator of the comic strip.
Yeah, the guy who probably, or the syndication which controls it, said Ron von der Schneck, Eagle publisher and general manager.
Neither the Butler Eagle nor any other newspaper that includes this strip had an opportunity to remove it,
even if they had discovered it before distribution.
Yeah, because you're probably all goo gobblers.
We apologize that such a disgusting trick.
I really don't believe anybody anymore.
I don't believe you for a minute.
You could have plucked it.
You saw it.
You're full of shit.
We apologize that such a disgusting trick was perpetuated on the reading public.
The Butler Eagle will discontinue that comic immediately.
Von the schnack said.
I couldn't find it.
Well, I looked, but.
Yeah, there it is.
And.
Down on the right hand corner.
I don't know if this one shows it or not.
Does it, Jace?
No, I've been looking for it.
I can't find it.
I found one, but it wasn't like, I don't know.
It didn't show the rest of the cartoon,
so it was just, but yeah, that's what it said.
You know, we finally tell you to go fuck yourself.
We finally say go fuck yourself.
Imagine, can you imagine when Obama was in was in office seriously there'd be an investigation
going 60 minutes would do an hour piece on it hbo bill maher covered for a half hour
rachel maddow's dick would get so hard if she read a story like that if uh you know somebody
said that about obama or whatever no president has ever been treated like this in the history of this country.
Just discuss here.
Anyhow, that is it, ladies and gentlemen, for today.
I'll save this a Google, Facebook, worse than media bias, but I think we all know how that goes.
They get into more detail on just how they
do it. And, uh, but we know all that, right? Google only controls all the information on the planet.
So you can see how they'd weigh in and maybe have an impact on up and coming elections by deciding,
by deciding what's hate speech and what's not. And funny, it's funny. It all comes down on the right.
People who talk like me get shut down.
Kind of fun.
It's out there in the open now.
So we'll touch on that and a little more tomorrow.
I thank you people for tuning into the show.
Go to nickadip.com.
And don't forget cameo.com.
And Roger Stone, I think it's rogerstonefundme.com and Roger Stone.
I think it's Roger Stone fund me.com or something like we've got to help him out.
I'll see if we can get ahold of him by Wednesday.
I just,
I,
again,
like I said,
the only reason I hesitate,
he's been through these stories a hundred times and,
but I love him.
The guy's an eccentric and he's out there.
He needs the money.
So donate to that and uh cameo.com
if you want me to uh you know straighten out your ugly boss or your stepmother with the cottage
cheese ass i'll tell her to hit the treadmill and uh wish somebody a happy bar mitzvah again you
guys uh you think it i say it you're very welcome. And I will talk to you tomorrow, Patreon members.
Take care. We'll see you next time.