The Nick DiPaolo Show - Black Males Diss Biden | Nick Di Paolo Show #1446
Episode Date: August 17, 2023In this episode right leaning comedian Nick Di Paolo talks about Creepy Joe, Blacks turning on Joe, and a whole lot more! Like what you hear? Get TWICE as much "Nick Di Paolo Show", full episodes of... Steven Crowder’s “Louder with Crowder” show and more on Mug Club! Sign up today to get all their content at https://Nickdip.com and use the promo code NICKDIP to get your first month FREE! For Tour Dates, Merch, stand-up clips and more visit https://nickdip.com
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🎵 And a man in my position can't afford to be made to look ridiculous.
Now you get the hell out of here.
And if that goomba tries any rough stuff, you tell him I ain't no bandleader.
Yeah, I heard that story.
How are you, folks?
Final day of the week for us, at least, a Thursday.
State of Georgia.
It's got a call spell.
It's dropped into the high 90s.
Finally got one of those things that blocks the sun, thanks to my wife, obviously.
You know, you put your windshield, that big fucking silver thing that opens.
Works very well until you touch it.
You burn your fingers up.
But it's been pretty.
Again, though, this isn't fucking 1948.
We work in air conditioning and whatnot.
Oh, I did order, I got them
Dallas, I meant to bring one in today
I haven't tried them yet because I'm afraid I got ripped off
I just don't
you guys see, it's probably clickbait
but there's an ad for these
it's a guy that worked for NASA
I think I talked about it the other day
makes these little air conditioners that you put
you use ice
and there's some type of shit that he puts in it that probably causes cancer and rats and humans.
But it'll cool, literally cool off a 400 square foot room.
They say literally it can drop it like 25 degrees in like 10 minutes.
So, I don't know.
I'm a sucker.
All's well, I'm happy.
I'm just relieved that it wasn't coming from China.
You know, my fucking, my wife still laughs at the basketball club.
I ordered these, they look like they're animals for adults.
It's got a king of spades on it and a king of spades and the wrong color, red, blue.
And I wear them, on the road, I wear them around the hotel.
It's something like a brother would wear, you know, thinking he's looking good.
Anyways, yeah, I want to try those.
The only reason I'm not trying the EFT, me and my wife have COVID.
We're freezing.
We go from sweating to freezing.
It's fucking, those chinks.
All right, enough already.
Red Sox down 2-0 to the Nats last night in the eighth inning.
Pablo Reyes gets up.
Hardly a power hitter, although he had a walk-off grand slam last week.
Hits a two-run home and a tie-in.
Red Sox a chair.
Before they even sit down from cheering, we bring in Garrett Whitlock,
who's one of our best pitchers, but he's been out for a couple months.
It's first game back.
He gives up a single, then drills the next guy in the back,
and then the next guy hits a three-run bomb.
Then the next guy hits a solo home with a downed six-two.
That's the kind of year it's been.
It's fucking odd.
All right, let's get right to it.
Creepy Uncle Joe.
President Biden raised eyebrows Wednesday when he invited children to join him on an
ice cream run.
Shouldn't have done it while he's wearing a trench coat.
Telling the youngsters
that daddy owes you.
You don't
believe me? Watch.
I want to say one thing to your children.
I know some really great
ice cream places around here.
And daddy owes
you.
Ugh.
Hey little boy. Do you want some candy?
No, I want ice cream.
Oh my God, was that...
I wish he whispered like he does.
Imagine if he went, Daddy, oh shit.
That was creepy.
I could hear the little girl's snatches drying up.
Wait a minute.
Why would you cut?
I didn't mean, oh, what?
Alright, I guess we're off the air.
Look at Joe.
Oh my god.
The seemingly off-script remark
came during the octogenarian speech
marking
the first anniversary of the
Inflation Reduction Act.
Only thing that fucked it. Only inflation that reduxes the doll that he bangs. the first anniversary of the Inflation Reduction Act.
Only thing that fucked it.
Only inflation that reduxes the doll that he bangs after he pulls the plug out of its neck.
Anyway, the moment quickly made the rounds on social media
where Senator Ted Cruz captioned a clip of Biden's comment
with hashtag stranger danger.
Exactly how hard is it for Joe Biden
to not be a complete creep around kids,
Canary CEO Dan Kay wrote.
That's a sick question.
You're a sick fucker.
I'm not that sick that I'm going to answer it.
Apparently pretty hard, one follower responded.
Biden has been criticized in the past
for his perceived off-color comments,
which are often directed
at young people, usually girls. He buries his nose into their fucking freshly washed hair.
In October 2022, he made headlines for telling a young California teen,
no serious guys until you're 30. He says to a girl, she was like 12 years old.
He says to a girl, she was like 12 years old.
Here he shows her how to give head.
What did I just say about California?
Also, last year, Biden failed to keep his cool during an address at the National Education Association.
He wouldn't miss that one.
The country's largest teachers union, Fox News Digital, said in the middle of a speech,
Biden indicated a woman in the crowd and said, we go back a long time.
Get this.
She was 12.
She was 12.
And he says, she was 12 and I was 30.
But anyway, I know.
What are you, working the improv? Uh, this woman, uh, this woman helped me get an awful lot done anyway, he says.
You're raping me.
This is rape.
This is rape.
This is rape.
And it's imitation vanilla.
Earlier this summer, the Washingtonian published a timeline of all the ice cream stores Biden has visited since he was sworn into office
three years ago.
He probably likes the help there.
He doesn't even like ice cream.
You know what I mean?
I can't believe this guy isn't, I guess it'd be too obvious he hangs out at Hooters like
I used to when I was on the run.
I kept dropping my fork.
Tammy, can you get the?
He's not hiding it very well.
If he's got a thing for kids kids ice cream is the way to go
that's true actually yes
you know the beauty of Hoda's down south
the whole families are there and shit
I actually have my picture
at one of them on the wall
can you imagine I'm like who put that up there
is there a manager
I want to fucking know who likes me in here.
And it turned out
it wasn't me, actually. It was fucking Billy Joel
when he was younger. No.
Somebody,
I guarantee it was a male waiter
or cook that liked my coffee.
Although I did pretty good.
Before I got
into relationships, I enjoy chlamydia.
Hey, who doesn't?
Let's move on.
Blacks badmouth Biden.
We'll stay on Uncle Joe.
So now we know he's a pervert.
Oh, we've known him for a long time.
Now let's see the blacks that are turning on him.
A new focus group of minority male voters provided pessimistic reviews of President Joe Biden's leadership of the country
according to Politico, which is Spanish for politics. I still don't even know what the
fuck that means. Somebody help me out anyways. Hey, where are the white women at? In 2020,
Biden's campaign frequently touted its appeal to minority voters in contrast to his primary rival,
independent Senator Bernie Sanders of Vermont,
after two and a half years of his administration, minority men reported negative views about Biden's
handling of key issues such as the economy. I love it. If they're bummed about the economy,
you know what I'm saying? According to a focus group conducted of Biden voters by HIT hit strategies and first reported
by El Politico, Los Politicos. People had such high hopes for him because he said he's going to
set the bar here and everything he's done has fallen short, said Ray Lewis.
short, said Ray Lewis.
And said,
uh, fuckin' Thurman.
I can't think of a black guy. Tyrone the tight end.
Said a participant in the
focus group from L.A. whose name
was not published. Why not, you
puss?
Joe, they're turning
on you.
By contrast,
this is what's beautiful.
The guy only didn't badmouth Biden, the African-American.
He spoke favorably of former President Donald Trump,
who's currently the leading Republican candidate to challenge Biden.
Again, unless he's in leg irons because of this fascist,
cocksuck administration.
The presumptive Democrat nominee in the 2024 presidential election.
So Trump's stomping everybody.
Trump got in there and he changed stuff, the brother said, I added.
If you're getting the job done, I can't really hate on that.
That's how you know it's a brother.
The man said when asked about Trump's legal controversy.
So he's right.
I am your voice. Yeah, yeah, yeah boy i don't think it makes any difference
now this is another black guy talking and who is exactly what's wrong with the country
and it demonstrates perfectly how the dem party has brainwashed a lot of black guys i don't think
it makes any difference between trump or biden the economy seems to be fried no matter who's in
office, said another black man from Cleveland. No, they're ignorant. That's ignorant. Who
participated in the focus group. See, that's so typical. He doesn't even know how much he's been
brainwashed. It doesn't matter. The economy sees pride no matter whether it was Biden or
Trump. Really? We only have a million statistics that prove otherwise. But your hatred, because
you've been told by evil Whitey on the left, right, that Trump's Nazi and, you know, it's bad
no matter whose office, you know. And I always say that when people say, oh, both sides are bad.
Whoever's saying that is the guilty party who's getting fucked.
It's usually the left.
According to him, he also lamented Biden's inability to shepherd the George Floyd.
Oh, now we're getting to what this guy's all about.
To shepherd the George Floyd's Justice in Policing Act through the Democrat-led 117th
Congress.
You see what this is about?
You see?
It's always about race with a guy that says, oh, they both suck.
The economy's fried, meaning it ain't helping me,
even though I don't want to get up before fucking 12.
What?
That's a stereotype.
Shut the fuck up.
I just said it.
Coke.
Gets me going in the morning.
And said that he was unsure about whether he would vote
for Biden in the next election.
Other minority voters beyond the hit focus group have expressed similar concerns, and said that he was unsure about whether he would vote for Biden in the next election.
Other minority voters beyond the hit focus group have expressed similar concerns.
With Biden's presidency, when you don't address the things directly,
when they don't go according to what you said publicly, they were going to, you can't just kind of sweep it under the rug,
said Jennifer Roberts, a Democrat registered black woman in Atlanta
who owns a tow truck business up in that motherfucker.
To the New York Times, she expressed disappointment with her performance, his performance, managing
the economy, specifically inflation, according to the Times.
By the way, folks, in the second half of the show, I just want to, before I forget, I'm
going to be talking about Apple censoring a huge voice on the right and an NFC,
NFC,
FNC, Fox News personality,
a huge one,
curses live on the air.
It's fucking worth seeing.
It's exclusively on the Mug Club,
so join now to get it at nickdip.com.
Anyways, Biden needs to be a little bit more sincere
instead of pandering to us.
When it's time to vote, said Marvin Dutton, former strong safety for the Rams, a black entrepreneur
in Atlanta, the Times reported. And when he said that, Biden looked at him and said,
I don't know what you're smiling at, watermelon. I don't fucking dare you, you racist.
Let's take a look at something. I guess it's Joe.
I tell you what, if you have a problem figuring out
whether you're for me or Trump,
and you ain't black, and you ain't black,
and you ain't black,
and you ain't black.
That's ignorant.
How dare you.
Man, if Trump said that,
the shit that you people on the left ignore,
I really hope it goes down.
I just, again, I'll watch it from my house.
I'll watch it on TV.
I hope it, but the first thing you do is,
can I say this when I'm going to, I don't know.
You go after the networks.
I mean, you go to where they work
with Heineken bottles.
That's all I'm going to say.
And write strongly worded letters.
Yes, exactly.
You write them in blood from fucking Cooper Anderson.
Anderson Cooper, what's his name?
What goes first?
I don't like a guy with two first names or two last names.
Fucking jerk off.
Anyways, let's move on.
Hey, boys and girls, head over to NickDip.com to get exclusive hats, T-shirts, hoodies, and more.
It's yet another way for you to support the show and look sexy at the same time.
You can also get signed copies of my previous specials and all of the Nick-a-shirts.
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Again, that's nickdip.com.
Click on store.
Thank you guys so much.
See you soon.
Free speech lives on for another day at least.
A federal appeals court delivered a major free speech victory on Tuesday,
ruling that Washington, D.C. officials selectively enforce statute to arrest pro-life activists,
but not Black Lives Matter protesters in 2020.
So we won one.
Three years too late.
Yeah.
Well, you know, the courts, you know, the legal fucking system takes forever.
No.
Well, yeah.
Kind of jammed.
I mean, do you know that?
I'm serious.
You know, 1% of the United 1% Dallas
I want you to fucking I read this 10 years ago. It's probably more
1% of the population of the United States is lawyers
I've read that about 10 years ago when it was like 300 million people
The average Indian goes that's only 1% 1% of 300 million your mama Luke
That's why you fucking,
unless you're Donald Trump being indicted
and now they're going to fucking,
they can pick the speed up.
Yeah, exactly.
Motherfuckers.
In the summer of 2020,
thousands of Black Lives Matter protesters
showed up on my front lawn.
I threw all kinds of pudding packs at them.
Why did they put that in there? Black Lives Matter protesters flooded DC. showed up on my front lawn. I threw all kinds of pudding packs at them.
Why did they put that in there?
Black Lives Matter protesters flooded D.C. over several weeks.
They covered the streets, sidewalks, and storefronts.
Remember this with paint, chalk.
While these markings violated the district's defacement ordinance, no protesters were arrested.
Can you imagine that in such a racist country?
However, district police officers were arrested. Can you imagine that in such a racist country? However, district police officers were quick.
Excuse me.
Come.
Were quick to arrest two pro-life advocates
in a smaller protest for chalking,
they wrote this on the street,
Black Preborn Lives Matter.
They got arrested for that.
First of all, it's politically correct.
How about all,
how about all preborn lives matter?
And they still get arrested.
Outside the public sidewalk,
outside of D.C., Plannedc planned paranoid facility is where they put it
you fucking believe that shit fucking hypocrite watch your mouth um unbelievable anyway so then
we finally found the judge i guess this was so obvious that's how far off the reservation they
were with this one that you know even a dc judge D.C. judge is going, what are you fucking?
You know what I mean?
I'm sure it's against
everything she believes in,
but so this broad comes along.
Hear ye!
The court's in session.
The court's in session now.
Here come the judge.
What's the bish?
The government may not enforce
the laws in a manner
that picks winners and loses
in public debates,
reads the D.C. Circuit opinion penned by this woman here,
Judge Naomi Rao, reversing a lower court's decision.
It would undermine the First Amendment's protections for free speech.
I knew that.
If the government could enact a content-neutral law
and then discriminate against disfavored viewpoint.
All these cases always go one way, do you notice?
It's always the fucking right being censored or arrested under the cover of prosecutorial
discretion.
In other words, yeah, they can't admit, they can't, you know what, apply the law, supposedly
blindly.
The First Amendment prohibits discrimination, no kidding,
on the basis of viewpoint irrespective of the government's motive.
Somebody tell that to this administration.
The three-judge panel ruled.
They said, we hold the foundations.
He has plausibly alleged the district. In other words, these are the pro-life people.
They're backing up what they're
saying, they have plausibly alleged the district discriminated on the basis of viewpoint in the
selective enforcement of its defacement ordinance. We therefore reverse the dismissal, this,
honestly, a third grader's could have got this one right. We reverse the dismissal of the foundation's First Amendment claim
and remand for further proceedings. So it's freedom, baby. Imagine we're at a point where
something that should never be an issue in the first place, we have to cheer when we win one.
That's how off the reservation the left is. You know, I'm starting to hate you people.
I just wanted an awkward silence.
I have these, you know, you guys know the history of my teeth.
I'm just fucking, I have to cut my fruit now,
like I'm a 91-year-old fucking jerk-off.
Last night,
I'm putting a kumquat
in a fucking blender.
I'm going to be feeding you
fruit, like,
mash
in your high chair.
I know.
I keep,
I keep thinking he's my age.
Dallas looks my age.
Just,
just because of the,
what?
You're welcome.
Can't help it, the beard, you know.
But, yeah, I keep thinking that.
But I know I'm going to forget and bite into a motherfucking sandwich.
And I'll be at Crowder's place when I do it.
You know what I mean?
And there's no going on TV if these suckers pop out.
I made my wife cry once.
Not physically. Relax.
But I had the, you know,
I have the whatever the fuck,
the caps or whatever. I was supposed to do
Red Eye with Gutfeld,
which they taped on
like Saturday, I think early afternoon
or whatever the fuck. So I'm eating
a sandwich right at my house
when we lived in West. I bite into it
and I go,
and I look at my wife and I got these brown nubs
sticking out. She literally, her eyes filled up.
She felt so bad for me.
I'm laughing.
Can you imagine having that kind of sensitivity?
If that was her, I would have shit blood laughing.
What is funnier than
that? Other than
like Don Gavin said,
maybe one of your friends catching on fire or something.
She started crying.
God bless her sweet soul.
Hey, for those of you on Mug Club,
stick around for the second half of the show.
Everyone else, go to nickdip.com.
Join to get my full show.
Get Steven Crowder's full show.
I think you got Alex Jones on the
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more. And while you're there at NickDip.com,
click on my tour button
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dates. September 15th,
Rob's Playhouse
Theater
in Buffalo, New York.
September 16th,
the Santander Arena,
Reading, Pennsylvania,
with Greg Gutfeld,
Jimmy Norton,
and a couple of other guys
that are very funny,
Jamie Lissow,
and Joe Mackey, I believe.
And then September 17th,
the next night,
man, I'm like the Stones.
Hilarities Comedy Club,
one show,
September 17th,
in Cleveland, Ohio.
One of the best clubs in the country.
I love Nick Costa.
He's the best.
So do that, will you?
Come out and see me.
We'll touch each other.
Yay.
I am Mike Gilligan. guitar solo guitar solo Bye.