The Nick DiPaolo Show - California Doesn't Get It | Nick Di Paolo Show #596
Episode Date: September 17, 2021MI State Rep Smuggles Contraband. Libs Eating Libs. James Craig Accosted by Libs....
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Hi, boys and girls. Nick DiPaolo here.
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Thank you so much. Oh, yeah.
Welcome to the final day of the week.
I love saying that on a Thursday.
You poor bastards at work.
Anyways, but you know how it works with me.
Then I go on the road sometimes and I don't get a day off in two weeks.
You know, not exactly a coal mine in Kentucky, but I'm just saying.
Anyhow.
I love the smell of napalm in the morning.
Me too.
Me too, Senator.
It's freedom, baby, yeah.
I feel like playing with the buttons today.
You know, we haven't heard from in a long goddamn time.
What's his fucking name?
My favorite gay fella ever.
I can't even find the fucking thing.
Forget about it.
Jesus Christ.
Is this fucking week almost over. Okay. Let's get
right to it, shall we? I got nothing to say, except for my hip. Finally having my hip checked.
That's where I'm at. I've been lamping on this fucking left hip, I'd say three, four
years. But now I'm having trouble getting up the fucking stairs. So finally, got an appointment.
Can't wait till they tell me, oh, that's rotting away.
You've got about a year.
My response would be, thank Christ.
You've been watching the news, doc.
And I've got to get the, you know what, the testosterone
shots in my ass.
I do testosterone therapy
thanks to the advice of Joe Rogan.
I've told you
this before. Did I ever put up the pictures
of when I almost bled out my underwear?
Oh, God.
I've got to fucking send you these.
They put an incision in my ass
cheek. They stick a straw in there, and then
they feed capsules, like eight to ten capsules
in my ass, in the cheek of it or whatever the fuck and uh the first time i did it be like okay no
problem go me and andy go to have lunch and then we went to a car dealership to look at something
being done to her car and uh she goes your pants are wet she reached for my wallet or something
she goes you i was bleeding like I got a shotgun wound.
And we go right back
to the doctor. I got nervous when his eyes
got this big. He's like, what the hell?
I mean, soak through.
I got the pictures right here. Maybe I'll send them to you.
I don't know why we don't stop the thing.
I keep forgetting we're doing this live
or something.
But anyways,
it was fine. It was just he had no idea why
that happened. I got a muscular ass, all right? Probably have some black in me. What do you
want me to tell you? But there's blood on my car seats. It looked like when you watch
the ID network and there's a murder scene and the guy doesn't clean up the blood in
the Toyota.
Anyway, so I got to have that done.
It's fun because the doctor's fucking, he's a riot. He's my wife's gynecologist and he's fucking
cracking jokes, the whole like inappropriate shit. And I go, you get to look at my wife's
fucking pussy. You fucking met her for two minutes. I, you know, I had to buy her like
three lobster dinners. How was that for you?
You leave some candy corn in the waiting room and you're in her pants?
What's the matter with you?
What's the matter with you?
Anyways, that's another whole story.
I might, before the show's out, I might, I got to send you the pictures because you're
going to cry when you see me.
Can we pause right here?
Stop it.
So take a look at these. I was talking about the, you know what,
testosterone capsules put into my butt cheek every, I don't know, four or five months.
You got to do that when you're in your late 90s. But like I said, I sprung a leak on the first one.
And what's so weird was I was sitting in my car right after I had the treatment done. I saw the
doctor in the parking lot. And kiddingly, I was going to go,
hey, I'm bleeding out, but I didn't.
And then me and Andy went to lunch,
then went to the car dealership, and that happened.
I was going to yell that to him anyways.
So his, no trigger warnings, God damn it.
Look at that.
First of all, whose bloomers am I wearing?
What the fuck?
So I said to my wife, yeah, I don't want to hear about your heavy days ever again.
This is me after a date with Caitlyn Jenner.
No.
Looks like a map of South America.
Go ahead.
There we go.
I put that up on the door.
I was hoping company would come in. My wife went nuts. I said, hey, you married a comic. Fucking enjoy. It's almost pretty,
isn't it? Kind of a Japanese fl- maybe I'll do what Hunter Biden does and sell
this shit. And then watch. Here's the one that you'd see on the ID network. Look,
here's Ted Bundy before he got his process down. Leaving a trail of a fucking Sigma Chi sweetheart.
Look at that fucking...
I reached back to my pants was sopping, and it didn't fucking hurt.
It stung a little, but when I saw the doctor's eyes get like this, I'm like, what am I going to die here?
In the name of fucking, you know, keeping an erection.
For who? I mean, really, man. Anyways, I just wanted to show that
to you. So I'll be doing that again tomorrow. Oh, and the other thing, I think I've mentioned
this on the show before, is the whole thing about when you do testosterone or steroids,
your testicles shrink. And that is so true. It's scary. I have the nuts of a sixth grade boy well
how would I know that well I was in sixth grade let me clarify that I'm just
saying I don't like it I have an egg average penis to begin with and my and
this was his response the doctor I'm not shitting you I said I'm getting some
testicles Frank and she goes well that's that kind of works in your favor, don't it? What the fuck? You're joking? I said,
if I was out there single and swinging it around, yeah, I'd go, look at the size of my car. Well,
you're not selected. Anyways, that's that. So I suggest you do it, though.
In the N-word segment tonight, well, of california proved once again they are the
dumbest state in the union congrats west virginia you're off the hook it looks like they voted to
keep the shapeshifter gavin newsom as their governor a state that prides itself on inclusion
and racial equality picked the poster boy of white privilege and supremacy. This guy is whiter than a Lawrence
Welk rerun. If Newsom were any whiter, he'd be Larry Elder, for Christ's sakes. I can see why
they stuck by Newsom. It's not like under his leadership, crime has been skyrocketing, homeless
encampments dotting the landscape, schools failing, or taxes are through the roof, wildfires every
other day because of bad forest management,
the electric grid doesn't work, and they have rolling blackouts, and they have a water shortage.
So I won't even bring up the drug problems. Let's put it this way. There are so many people
on drugs in California, they wanted to keep Newsom as governor. Let's put it that way.
Other than those problems, Gavin has been knocking it out of
the park, according to the idiots that live in California. Most of them, not all he is. So it's
obvious why they wanted to stick with such an effective leader. They say the voters of the
suburbs of San Francisco and San Francisco, the city itself, they're the ones who helped put him over the top so he could stay governor.
You know San Francisco, right? The city that has its own app that tells you how to avoid human
feces, literally. Those people. Hey, who are we to question the judgment of a city that worries
more about your tax dollars going to a titty job for your sanitation man than safe streets.
Even with all that evidence in front of their eyes, they stick with the elitist scumbag Newsom.
People are fleeing the state like Afghanis did Kabul after the Taliban took over. It won't be
long before we see footage of people falling to their deaths from the wings of a Southwest jet headed to Tucson.
They choose this abject failure over a black conservative because the truth is the only time
the Democrats pretend to like black people is when a presidential election rolls around.
They treat blacks like the single guy who goes out to the bar to get laid but comes up empty
but has the ex-girlfriend he can count on for a booty call
at 3 a.m. You know what, California? You get what you deserve. Enjoy your failing one-party state
and your governor who likes it that way as long as he's the man in charge.
And that is the N-word. My ass!
Oh, one other thing.
I quit smoking when I was away for two weeks
doing the thing upstate New York, the movie.
Let's say about day eight, halfway through,
I had to do a scene where I do an interpretive modern dance. It's not what you
think, folks.
And I couldn't catch my breath
after. It was only like two, three minutes
I was jumping. I couldn't catch my breath.
It's never happened to me in my life.
I've been a jock my whole life and shit.
Not so much, obviously, later years, but
I've always stayed in shit. I couldn't get my breath
back. Then I realized I've been sucking
on that vape around the clock since I got up to the movie set
upstate New York.
And it made me so goddamn nervous
that I had three new vapes
and I threw them in the woods
and didn't touch a cigarette.
And since I've been back,
so I quit August 31st or September 3rd.
So I've had a total of five cigarettes since then.
So I don't know if that's under control or not.
But it's the vape, Matthew.
You said it too.
The vape, man.
It's filling my lungs with some type of custard.
All right.
Let's move on.
Maybe this country's going in the fucking toilet.
Because people vote for guys like this at the local level.
Jewel Jones.
No, he's not a hip-hop artist.
There he is.
Can't judge a book by its cover.
I'm sorry.
I'm not voting for him.
I like the tie.
Jewel Jones, Michigan state rep, found with handcuffed key inside jail.
This jerk off, can you imagine somebody voted this guy in?
I believe, right?
He's an elected official.
He's a state rep.
Of course he is.
Jewel Jones faced additional felony charges Wednesday after he was allegedly found in
possession of a handcuffed key after he was arrested Tuesday due to his bond being revoked from a prior
arrest.
What a clever.
I'm black, y'all, and I'm black, y'all, and I'm black, and I'm black, y'all.
Vote for me.
He was arraigned Wednesday on charges of attempting to escape custody while awaiting a felony
trial and bringing a weapon into jail, according to the, what's the weapon?
The key?
I don't really...
I don't understand that.
Matthew, are you going to say something?
I'm looking to see if it tells you anywhere that he had something or if they're just considering
the key can be used as a weapon.
Yeah, I guess it can.
What are you going to do?
Fucking scratch somebody's car?
All right.
Yeah. All right.
Let's move on.
This guy is a real
piece of work and an embarrassment
to all elected officials.
That's true. You are correct, sir.
And I believe, this is the sheriff
talking, he thinks somehow the laws
do not apply to him. That was Livingston
County Sheriff Michael Murphy.
He said, more than that, I am mad.
Had the handcuff key, he said, ended in an injury to my staff or another inmate,
I'm not sure what I would have done as my primary responsibility
is the safety and security of my staff and inmates.
Jones, 26, was arrested for allegedly violating his bond. I'm talking about a fucking
state rep here, not a fucking wide receiver for the fucking Falcons. Arrested for allegedly
violating his bond for the third time related to a drunken driving crash earlier this year.
His blood alcohol, I remember talking about this guy, his blood alcohol content at the time was more than twice the legal speed limit
No, the legal limit Jones alcohol tether on his ankle
Detected alcohol in his system. We'll all be wearing these eventually
They are they're trying to design cars that won't start now. You have to blow into them that that's coming by the way
So enjoy the freedom
Anyways, it detects the alcohol in the system.
Three times on September 3rd, it detected alcohol in his system.
Drinking and driving is a violation of his bond.
And he allegedly, just driving is a violation.
And he allegedly tampered with the tether on September 6th.
He's like, what's wrong with the black man's mind?
What's wrong with the black man's mind!
There's something wrong with his mind!
He was elected to the state legislature in 2016.
Jones pleaded not guilty Wednesday.
His bond was set at 100 Gs, cash or surety, according to the news.
Officers allegedly found the key taped to the bottom of Jones' foot
during intake at the Livingston County Jail on Tuesday.
They check the bottom of your feet?
That is an elected official, and that's where we are.
As somebody once said,
the United States,
the only way we'll be defeated
is to rot from the inside out.
And you're witnessing it.
You are witnessing it.
Enjoy.
Mama.
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In our Libs Eating Libs segment,
California parents demand answers
on school board members' profane tweets.
Really disturbing to me, whoever wrote the article said.
Parents in Chula Vista, California.
What is that Spanish for?
Chula? A view of Chula. That, California. What is that Spanish for? Chula?
A view of Chula.
That's what that means.
Our demanding answers from Kate Bishop.
Kate Bishop?
Who is Kate Bishop?
Oh, she's a beautiful young lady.
Oh, my God.
Katie.
Get down, Katie.
Get down.
Katie.
Stop, Katie. Get down, Katie. Get down. Katie. Stop, Katie.
Lisa Lampanelli.
No.
Lisa's actually...
But I'm going to surprise you with my take on this, okay?
A member of the school board whose years-old vile messages on Twitter
recently went viral after a concerned father shared them on social media.
The interim superintendent distanced the school district from Bishop's tweets,
and Bishop herself acknowledged the tweets as past mistakes and
said they were meant to be funny.
Uh-oh, retard alert.
Retard alert.
What's funny is you're a man with makeup on.
Not enough fucking Jack Daniels.
But I'm, let me, I'll give you my take.
I'm pretty sure I hit my sexual peak today.
Somebody bring me an 18-year-old boy stat, Bishop tweeted nine years ago with a hashtag hormones.
with the hashtag hormones, parents criticized a second tweet sent in 2011, which read,
off to the park to see what hot three-year-old girls my kid can hit on with hashtag happy Valentine's Day.
Here's my take.
She was trying to be funny.
I don't like that a father,
and I'm guessing that father's probably 20 years younger than me,
was offended by something that she wrote years ago.
I'm guaranteed her politics aren't the same as mine,
whatever the fuck.
Yeah, those jokes were kind of, you know, touch and go.
But grow the fuck up.
Can we play? That goes for whatever.
Was that really that?
She's not saying, hey, she didn't say, hey,
I want to fuck a six-year-old boy.
That's what Anthony Weiner would do
and get away with it. Whoever.
Pick your favorite pedophile.
Do you know what I mean?
And as far as the kid
hitting on another,
whatever.
Just letting you know
the kid likes snatching for.
There's something you don't hear often
on the Hannity Show.
So anyways, Miss Bishop,
I probably, like I said,
I have nothing common with you politically,
but I'm standing up for you right there.
But so many people on the right have been canceled because of shit that went on in the past.
So maybe fuck you.
I'm on the fence.
Katie Davidson Brock, a Chula Vista native and mother of three children, is the problem.
We gave women the right to say anything.
That was very Taliban-like.
I'm only kidding.
One of whom attends Chula Vista, her kid's elementary school,
told Fox News in an interview on Tuesday,
I think that someone with this type of character is unfit to serve.
What is she? She's a teacher? What is she doing?
I don't even remember the beginning of the article.
She's a teacher, right?
So I say to this mom, who gives a fuck what you think?
You got to lighten up.
Kimberly Dickinson and Matt Dixon, parents of two, called on Bishop to resign,
describing her marble man jaw-dropping tweets
her Marble Man jaw-dropping tweets,
and raising concerns about the school district turning a blind eye to such behavior.
You see how liberalism has taken the fun out of life?
And just think about that,
people getting upset about that 10, 20 years.
Matt Dixon called the tweet very, very frightening.
Hey, grow a pair, Matt.
Go home and take your skirt off
and have a fucking chamomile tea.
What is it? Chamomile?
Chamomile. Scary my
producers both knew that.
By the way, Matt, you know
Matt took over for Jason, and we got
Dallas, who we just hired,
who, by the way, I just found out
did a couple tours
in Afghanistan and Iraq.
You were a contract.
We have a true patriot in the room.
Tommy doesn't tell me this.
I'm thinking this guy was a mechanic from Pooler.
Got a true hero right in the room.
Anyways, to choose an 18-year-old, here's the mother again,
to choose an 18-year-old boy as opposed to somebody her own age,
then it wouldn't have been funny, whore.
It appears to have a predatory context.
Oh, this is the guy saying it.
This is what bugs me.
This is a guy getting upset,
noting that bishops seem to be looking for somebody young and vulnerable.
Hey, who doesn't?
looking for somebody young and vulnerable.
Hey, who doesn't?
Having somebody who looks at young people in that manner is very, very scary.
Oh, for the love of your sister's ass.
Will you shut up?
Will you?
Will you please shut up?
Will you shut up?
Shut up!
Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!
In 2012 message, Bishop wrote,
I wanna... This one I kinda liked.
I wanna hate fuck Paul Ryan.
Maybe she likes men. I wanna hate fuck Paul Ryan. Maybe she likes men. I want to hate fuck Paul Ryan while he is gagged
with my absentee ballot on which I voted for Obama. I knew I had nothing in common politically
with you, but you know what? You're pretty goddamn funny, dog face. I voted for Obama. In 2013,
she wrote about having a dildo purchase on her credit card statement.
I love this fucking broad.
On election day 2016, she wrote of Donald Trump,
Dear Rust Belt, he lied.
Your manufacturing jobs are never coming back.
You fucked us.
No love, Kate.
Whatever.
It's her opinion.
She's retarded like the rest of them, but I think kind of funny.
I understand she may have been joking, Davidson Brock admitted.
Even so, you should have stopped there, Davidson Brock.
Even so, she insisted that someone with that type of character shouldn't be making decisions
for our children.
Well, what exactly is she doing?
Is she telling you kids what to eat and shit?
That's the government's job. You
know that. Chula Vista, a very beautiful place with one white person. Chula Vista Elementary
School District Interim Superintendent Oscar Escobilla distanced the board from Bishop's
tweets in a statement. He said, I don't know that bitch from shit. The social media posts
occurred years before Kate Bishop's election to the Board of Education.
Her personal tweets do not represent the opinions or beliefs of the Chula Vista Elementary District.
Esquivel wrote,
You're a wormy cocksucker, you know that?
She replied.
Anyways, Ms. Bishop, I hate your politics.
I think you're fucking retarded.
But you know what?
I don't, I, come on.
Again, what jumps out at me is it's guys going, oh, my God.
She's not babysitting your kids.
Speaking of lefties, as you know, the reason they're so violent and shit and they call you racist and bigot when you're debating, they have no, everything they believe in is refuted by everyday evidence in real life, period.
So they get, you know, they get violent.
They lose the argument.
They call you a Nazi.
They punch you in the face.
This is how it's always been.
the argument. They call you a Nazi. They punch you in the face. This is how it's always been.
Left-wing agitators mob Michigan Republican James Craig as he announces bid for governor.
And these lefties shut down the press conference. They wouldn't let him talk.
And I've seen this guy on Tucker Carlson, stand-up dude, older black gentleman,
who was a cop for years. And if you notice, and he'll talk about this during all those riots and shit, you didn't see nothing going on in Detroit because this
motherfucker, you know, they don't play that shit in Detroit anymore. Former Detroit police chief
James Craig, 65, tried to hold a press conference in a state park Tuesday to announce his candidacy
for governor of Michigan, but had to cut it short when a mob of scumbag, left-flecking-leaning, brain-dead people who are ruining this country, aggressive left-wing agitators prevented him from speaking.
Well, that's not fascist, is it?
So-called anti-fascist.
anti-fascist. As soon as he reached the podium at the Belle Isle Park to make his announcement,
the political newcomer was swarmed by dozens of women who never douche and guys who have no fucking balls whatsoever, who blasted air horns. They blasted air horns, raised their fists,
flipped the bird and screamed, hey, hey, ho, ho, James Craig's got to go.
Fucking children, children of the corn.
You got to grow up.
You're not a kid anymore.
You got to grow up.
I can't really recall anybody on the right doing this.
You? Shouting down, somebody, call me here now. I can't really recall anybody on the right doing this. Do you?
Shouting down, somebody call me here now,
even though I don't have a phone.
Agitators from Detroit, by the way,
this is the name of the group, Detroit Will Breathe.
As long as they're not drinking the water.
DWB held signs that read,
Racist-Ass Republican Craig.
James Craig Gives Nazis Guided Tours
and Defund DPD.
So just to give you an idea.
As the mob of mostly white activists
pressed in on the candidate from all sides,
his staff formed a human shield around him,
and local media reporters thrust their microphones up to his face
so he could be heard above the scumbags.
But still, it was impossible to hear the candidate speak.
One particularly menacing agitator was able to get disturbingly close
to the black Republican, pointing angrily at him,
shoving a staffer, hey, here you go again, more white racists,
and that's who they are, and shouting profanly at him, shoving a staffer, hey, here you go again, more white racists, and that's who they are,
and shouting profanities at him.
And I think Mr. James said this.
Fucking quiz!
No, he didn't.
Take a look at this clip of these assholes.
They're everything that's wrong in the country.
It's coming.
Hey, hey! James Grant has got to go! these assholes. They're everything that's wrong with the country. It's coming.
Notice the color of all the people chanting. Doesn't look like Detroit, does it? It's like two black people total there. there pause i don't see i see one black guy with his fist raised rest of them progressive white
scum it's coming you guys are asking for a fucking civil war. Oh, you're going to get one. Good luck where you know gun zones and shit, too, and you're fucking.
You are going to get a shit storm.
I'm telling you.
It's not even debatable anymore.
There's no fucking.
Oh, it's coming.
Ask Dallas.
He's seen war.
And it's coming.
Me and Matthew have seen it, too.
We watch the History Channel.
Can you imagine shouting this?
Go ahead.
I think that's about it.
Good.
People make me sick.
Craig finally shouted, I've got one thing to say.
I'm running for governor.
Then forced, this guy lived his whole life law and order in Detroit.
That was his living, and this is how they treat him, because he's a, you know, he's been on Tucker Carlson. That makes him a Nazi. That's the
other thing I forgot to mention. Do you see what's going on? There's some real strange bedfellows.
I didn't bring up Nicki Minaj this week, but she put, we didn't talk about that, did we? She put
out a tweet that was very reasonable a few days ago beginning of the week about how her cousin in uh in trinidad has a friend
who got the vaccine and now he's impotent and his balls swelled and his fiance called off the
wedding so she just said make sure you do your research i'm paraphrasing and don't get bullied
and the left went fucking berserk on her.
And she's a rapper from Queens, so she's not going to sit there and take it.
She came back at him.
She retweeted.
She was on Tucker.
Tucker showed a clip of her.
She retweeted.
So you got, think about this.
You have a black female rapper from Queens and Tucker Carlson.
Talk about strange bedfellows. You got Rose McGowan, who Queens and Tucker Carlson. Talk about strange bedfellows. You got
Rose McGowan, who was on Tucker Carlson. Do you see what's happening, you people on the left?
There's little cracks are coming. I'm just saying. Where was I? As I pretended this was a cigarette.
Anyways, he was forced to cut the speech short. He walked away as his staff pushed back against the scum agitators still pursuing him and his team.
According to the Detroit Free Press, Craig was eventually able to deliver his remarks from the rooftop of Icon Detroit,
where he touted his law enforcement experience and blasted Governor Gretchen Whitmer,
and blasted Governor Gretchen Whitmer, again, everything that's wrong with the world,
approach to fighting the pandemic.
And somebody said, Mr. Craig, what do you think of her?
She's a malignant cunt.
Exactly.
Craig didn't say that. I just did. Craig reportedly stressed his leadership skills using his campaign slogan,
leading from the front.
During an interview with Fox News, Tucker Carlson, Tuesday night,
the candidate said he recognized the agitators from the George Floyd protests
in the summer of 2020 and claimed that they came from outside of the city,
and you could tell that from the pigmentation.
White progressive scum.
Oh, I know them very well, Tucker, Craig said. Summer
of love 2020. Fucking guy's cool. He said the same activists had tried to silence him last year, too.
They wanted me to leave Detroit last year. I said, most of you need to leave. These folks are from
outside the city, and they're not speaking for anybody in the city. How can't you like this guy? He was the best guy around.
He's still around.
Craig brushed off their aggressive behavior, saying,
what they did today, not a big deal,
because most Michiganders are sick and tired of that madness.
The former law enforcement chief told Carlson
that members of the left-wing group still have a chip on their shoulder
because law enforcement won last year.
I know several of the members, he explained. Under Craig's leadership, Detroit police were
largely successful in preventing riots or at least limiting the damage from riots caused by
George Floyd protests. During an appearance on Tucker Carlson tonight on July 28th of 2020,
when he was still the police chief, Craig said,
we don't retreat here in Detroit. We're just not going to do it. You saw the images, Tucker,
of streets where there was lawlessness, looting, burning, no sight of police officers. We weren't
giving up ground to the radicals. I like the guy personally. But you know, to your left-wing white guy progressives,
he's a fascist.
How about they call Larry Elder the face of white supremacy, a black guy?
You guys aren't out of your fucking minds, huh?
Gin and juice.
Ladies and gentlemen, you know I do this as a moonlighting job.
What I really do is work for DoorDash.
Hey, guys, I'm back doing stand-up next weekend in Florida and really wanting to come out and fill the goddamn seats.
I just put in a kitchen that I could sell coke for the next 10 years.
I can't pay for.
On Thursday, September 23rd, I'll be at the Palm Beach Kennel Club in West Palm Beach.
One show, 8 p.m.
The very next night, Friday, September 24th, I'll be at the new Sidesplitters Comedy Club.
I'm very excited.
They have a new club.
Sidesplitters Comedy uh room at the Grove in
Wesley Chapel no matter which part of Florida you're in you can drive to see me live next week
also I'll be in Las Vegas November 12th if we're allowed and 13th at the Comedy Works one of the
best prettiest rooms you'll ever see uh because my manager Tommy is behind it. 12th and 13th at the
Comedy Works at the Plaza Hotel and Casino. Get tickets to all these shows at nickdip.com,
could you? Beautiful. There are white niggers. I haven't seen a lot of white niggers in my time.
Watch your mouth, sir.
In the reverse, the race segment tonight,
the Minnesota Supreme Court overturned,
boy, they fucked up in Minnesota.
How did that happen?
That's stating right in the heart.
Supreme Court overturned the third-degree murder conviction
of a former Minneapolis cop who gunned down
an Australian woman in 2017,
likely leading to his prison sentence
being slashed by eight years.
That sentence made no sense.
It's just so ridiculous.
Oh, I get it.
What am I thinking?
It's 2021.
He's a black cop.
She's a white woman doing nothing.
Why was I thinking they were going to go hard on him?
I mean, the Capitol Police guy is not even doing any time. So tell me again how racist this country is. Fuck it.
Reverse the races on that one. Make the cop white and the broad black. And I'm sure the Supreme
Court has saw it the same way, right? Wednesday's decision rejected a February ruling by the Minnesota Court of Appeals
that upheld the conviction against Mohamed...
Right away, I'm not crazy.
Mohamed Noor and the July 2017 shooting death of Justine Rusick-Damond.
Noor was sentenced to 12 and a half years in prison
in 2019 after being convicted by
a jury of third degree murder
and second degree manslaughter for
shooting the unarmed yoga teacher.
They're always dangerous, yoga
teachers. I mean, they just
preach violence around the clock.
They tell you downward facing dogs, that's
so they can spank your ass. We know.
He shot this yoga teacher who was engaged to be married while responding to her 911 call about a possible sexual assault in an alley behind her home.
When we read the story, it didn't make sense then, and it doesn't now.
and it doesn't now.
Nor was not sentenced on the manslaughter count,
meaning his case
will not go back
to district court
for him to be sentenced.
He has already served
more than 28 months
on the murder conviction
and get this,
he could be eligible
for superized release
by the end of the year
if he receives
a presumptive four years
for manslaughter,
the AP reported.
I'm sure they're happy
about that.
What the fuck?
Really?
Wake up, white people.
I don't even know what to say about that.
Again, I keep hearing about how biased and prejudiced the legal system is against people of color in this country.
Yeah, reduce it.
Let him go.
I mean, he killed a Karen, right?
Basically.
A Karen with an accent.
Who cares?
I want to thank you guys all so much for supporting the show.
It's been really great to be back this week.
It has.
I actually missed you when I was doing that thing up there with the snuff film in New York.
Real quickly, before we break for the
weekend, I want to thank these people for
contributions last night.
Sean Powell of Florida. Can I get
some new names? I'm starting to read the same one.
I'd like to fucking make the show grow.
Somebody fucking... Sagnella
again? Thank you guys
from Connecticut, obviously. David
Hertz. I feel like I sleep with a guy. California.
Douglas
Larson, Colorado.
And the really generous contribution from
my friend, Lee Priest
in Australia, which
I don't know about.
Tom,
you better start telling me about
the money. I'm going to get fucking upset.
Thank you, Lee Priest. I don't even know what it is it could be a hundred dollars or maybe you're fucking you know a
shot from melbourne i don't know finally tonight is this the final story yes sir and then we have a
okay finally tonight and this one ought to warm your cockles.
Genealogists find evidence of Biden's ancestors owning slaves.
Joe Biden, Massa Joe.
Where are we?
What are we doing?
We're planting cotton.
Where?
What are we doing?
Genealogists have reportedly found evidence that President Biden's paternal colonial ancestors own slaves. finding detail in an adapted excerpt from Politico correspondent Ben Schreckensherr's upcoming book,
The Bidens Inside the First Family's 50-Year Rise to Power,
was recently discovered by Alexander Bannerman, a genealogist in West Virginia and lineage expert Gary Boyd Roberts,
who told me that I was Mexican and Irish.
After the 2020 presidential election, Bannerman worked alongside Roberts to put together Biden's genealogy for the winter 2021 issue of American Ancestors magazine.
I bet they weren't expecting this.
Bannerman told Schreckinger that during the research, theer found that two of Biden's ancestors on his father's side, you know, enslaved people while living in Maryland.
Again with that.
That was Joe's.
The president's relatives are enslaved.
Can you say that about Trump?
I don't know.
I'm guessing all his relatives are in fucking Berlin.
Jesse Robinette, the president's great-great-grandfather,
I might have forgot a great in there.
Who cares?
Enslaved two people in Allegheny County,
according to the 1800
census, Bannerman said, while Thomas Randall, another third great-grandfather of Biden,
enslaved one 14-year-old boy.
That's not enslavement.
That's a Tuesday night with a homo.
Now we know where Biden gets his hair-sniffing of children.
At least Biden sticks to it.
This guy enslaved a 14-year-old boy in Baltimore County in 1850.
Again, in San Francisco, that's a Thursday night.
The state of Maryland does not list any Bidens in its slavery database.
And they asked Jill Biden, and she said,
What folks says about this family, I does.
I has told you and told you
that you can always tell a lady
but the way that she eat in front of folks like a bird.
And I ain't aiming for you to go to Mr. John Wilkinson
and eat like a field hand and dabble like a hog.
That's all she had to say.
That is one of my favorite show.
One of the boy, huh?
We came back strong.
Maybe I should do more movies.
Anyways, that is it for the week.
Again, don't forget thecomicsgym.com
nickdip.com, click on the
tour button. Don't forget cameo.com
Come on, I'm not getting many right now.
Where I can roast one of your friends
or relatives. It makes a great birthday
gift or whatever. Or I can
be nice and say happy birthday,
congratulations on the circumcision, whatever. Or I can be nice and say happy birthday, congratulations
on the circumcision, whatever.
I'll make a video on my phone and
send it right to your friend. We roast
them and have fun. That is it. You guys
think and I will say it. You are very welcome.
We'll see you back here on Monday.
Have a great weekend, everybody.
And fuck those masks. Norm,
we love ya guitar solo I'm out.