The Nick DiPaolo Show - Clapton Sings the Vaccine Blues | Nick Di Paolo Show #540
Episode Date: May 17, 2021Biden and The Unmasking. Statuary Rape. MTG Speaks to MSDNC....
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Hey guys, I want to thank you so much for supporting this show.
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Finally.
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Not going to stop us.
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You're the reason for all this great stuff because it costs money to contribute. Just look for the, uh, contribute box on the comics, gym.com,
or you can go to nickdip.com and click on the contact page. Again, thank you guys so much. guitar solo Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
Turn my mic up a little bit, sir.
That's the great Matt. There you go. Perfect.
How are you, folks? Monday morning from the state of Georgia.
Oh, God.
Monday morning from the state of Georgia.
Just got back from the road.
What a trip, ladies and gentlemen.
You know, I used to take my fans for granted when I had none.
But let me tell you, I did Hilarities in Cleveland Wednesday,
a theater in Baltimore Thursday.
Excuse me, Gutfeld Wednesday, Cleveland Hilarities on Thursday.
I fucked up the plugs on Gutfeld, just like I did just now, by the way.
And people still showed up.
Baltimore on Friday at the FBX Theater.
And then Saturday,
ended it with Soul Joles and Royce at Pennsylvania.
Let me tell you something, folks.
Wow.
I mean, I got all kinds of gifts and shit.
Not that I want that stuff.
I had a lady give me a bag.
Didn't even get her name.
It had a really expensive necktie in it, a bottle of whiskey,
a glass football filled with vodka, which they took away from me at TSA.
I forgot it was in my bag.
And I said to the black lady, I said, if you want it, she got all mad at me.
I didn't mean it like that.
And what else was in there?
All kinds of stuff.
And then some guy gave me a ring that's a little big, a patriot ring in Pennsylvania.
He was like a biker, so it's square, so if you ever hit anybody, you'll open their face like a ripe cantaloupe.
But it was like, it's something I would actually buy.
FPX gave me and Tommy book bags filled with all kinds of stuff.
And there's this thin, it looks like a cell phone, but
it's thinner.
I should have brought it to Matt.
I don't even know what it is.
I don't know if it's an external drive, or it's in a place for a USB thing.
I don't know what it is.
It's called the Tempo Outlawry System, whatever.
All kinds of stuff like that in there.
Anyways, my fans are the best.
Soul Joles.
I felt like Jim Jones because we were under
a tent and these
people were just rabid. I saw like
10 AR-15
t-shirts and I felt I could have
let them out of there. We could have looted
downtown, the three buildings
downtown Royce.
They were sitting in sand.
They'd bring their own lawn chairs.
It was like a concert with a big, beautiful white tent over the crowd.
It was phenomenal.
And so was Hilarities, and so was Baltimore.
These people couldn't have been nicer, bringing me myrrh.
Stuff like that you read on the Bible.
Anyway, and Tommy was with me, which made it so much more palpable being on the road.
And let me tell you about my manager.
I've never seen a guy work like, it's kind of scary.
We're in the truck doing 80.
He's cutting and pasting on his phone.
Jesus, he didn't stop once.
Tremendous job.
Signed 400 autographs and pictures after the show.
Some lady in her 70s pinched my ass,
but that's good enough for me.
Ha, ha, ha, ha!
I want to thank all of you, seriously,
who came out to see me live.
It really rejuvenated me
and gave me some hope of the future.
We've got to...
And every time I do this, it's just more evidence.
Fucking Biden did not even come close to winning.
Sister's bug hole.
Let's get to it.
And remember this, you poor people pouring over to our country.
You're entitled to shit.
Just remember that.
You know you want crazy motherfucking WAP, huh?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Mr. DiPaolo, no one could be as nasty as you pretend to be unless they really wanted to be disliked.
Who's saying I'm pretending, Bob?
Let's get to it.
get to it. Right after we left on Tuesday, a couple days later, Biden came out and CDC reversed the whole thing as far as, you know, unmasking, I call it. And who would know more about unmasking
than Joe Biden? Remember General Flynn and Obama? Yeah, you fuckstone. A little wordplay for you people.
I'll give you a second to get that job.
All right.
So anyways, they said you can take the mask off or whatever.
Shit we already knew.
And I'm not doing it anymore.
I walked around the hotel.
I had two people say, you got to put your mask on.
And I said, what are you?
It was a maid.
I said, clean the toilet and shut it.
What are you, working for CDC, Maria, Conchita, Alonzo?
You guys can laugh aloud any time now.
Thanks, Matt.
Hold that in.
That's great.
Anyways, I sound like I'm fucking admonishing my audience.
Anyhow, yes, so that's the deal. We all know this is not a
surprise, okay? We all know this is horseshit. Let's roll the tape because Fuckface came out
like he's making an announcement, like, you know, he's going to get love for this. When I say
Fuckface, I'm only kidding, Joe Biden, but here you go. Today, the CDC made an important announcement yeah what was it starting today yeah if you're
fully vaccinated okay and you're outdoors yeah you need and not in a big crowd oh okay what are
your rallies mask i want to be absolutely clear yeah please be clear in a crowd yeah like a stadium
or at a conference yeah or a concert there you. There you go, fucks sake. You still need to wear a mask.
Pause.
How about an orgy with your wife, Jill?
Do you need a mask then when her 70-year-old bug opens up and moths fly out?
Okay, let it roll.
Even if you're outside.
Shit.
But beginning today.
Yeah.
Gathering with a group of friends in a park.
Going for a picnic. Pause. As long in a park. Going for a picnic.
Going for a picnic?
The fuck is this, 1955?
Hey, honey, get the blanket and the fucking potato salad.
We'll sit under a tree and finger pop each other.
What are you talking about?
Go for a picnic.
Why don't you go for a picnic right near an ocean?
Break a hip diving in.
Go ahead.
Vaccinated and outdoors,
you can do it without a mask.
The CDC is able to make this announcement
because our scientists are convinced by the data
that the odds of getting or giving the virus to others
is very, very low.
Yeah, we've all taken our masks off already, Joe.
And when he says our scientists, he's talking about the Chinese.
That's only who he listens to.
And I just wanted to make that clear.
Boy, he's doing a terrific job of reading that teleprompter.
Any more?
Is this jerk ever?
That's it?
Thank God he shut his dirty pie hole.
Oh, fucking idiot!
Every time I see the poor old guy,
I think of a...
Dead man walking.
That's the song he hears in his head.
Who knows more about unmasking?
I already said this.
President Joe Biden angered Republican lawmakers on Thursday night after he told Americans they had to receive a COVID-19 vaccine or wear a face mask until they did.
You see the play here, right, folks?
They're working the angle, so we're going to need what? Passports.
Guys like me
who are not getting vaccinated
because I had it.
I'm not getting vaccinated. I have the antibodies.
How do I know that? I cut
my finger. I pricked it, put some blood on it.
I have a microscope I got in high school.
So all these little shiny germs running around.
GOP
lawmakers liken the president to a tyrant in a social media post.
Look at him right there.
Saying the federal government couldn't force Americans to wear face coverings,
which is exactly right.
The rule is now simple.
Get vaccinated or wear a mask until you do,
President Biden tweeted on Thursday.
The choice is yours.
Who do you fucking think you're talking to?
Responding to Biden's post, Rep. Paul Gosser, Republican Arizona, wrote,
men must be governed by God or they will be ruled by tyrants, he said.
I'll put the guy who originally said it.
I am like God and God like me.
I am as large as God.
He is as small as I.
He cannot above me nor I.
Beneath him be.
Salacious 17th century.
La la.
Rep Mike Gallagher, former comedian with watermelon stains on his shirt,
tweeted that the federal government could not force you to wear a mask until you're vaccinated
and would have no way of tracking vaccinations, even if such a mandate were passed.
This doesn't account for natural antibodies, he added.
Exactly what I said, too.
The choice is yours.
Sounds an awful lot like a threat, Joe, Rep. Andy Biggs of Arizona tweeted.
You have no business issuing fear-based ultimatums to the American people.
They have the
freedom to choose whatever they please, vaccine or not. Exactly. And Biden replied,
tried. I did the best I could. What about me? What am I supposed to do?
Hey, where the fuck is Kamala Harris been?
See more Jimmy Hoffa than this bitch.
Where she be at? Where she be
hiding her Jamaican Indian ass?
You notice? She's like gone
missing. They have no idea
what they're doing. Yet you wouldn't know it from the
press. Huh? You remember how they were
all over Trump when he first moved into the White House?
Just everything.
The guidelines
apply to indoor and outdoor settings,
but the CDC also cautioned that face coverings
may still be required under federal or state laws.
See what they're doing?
They're getting, corporations are gonna do
their dirty business for them, you know what I mean?
When you go to businesses, hotels, whoever,
they're gonna tell you you still have to wear whatever,
because they don't have the balls to.
It's, you know, it's just one of the tenets of socialism.
It's just so ridiculous.
It really is ridiculous because, Joe, I don't know if you know this,
but I'll point out again, we have many examples.
I watched UFC.
They had about 20,000 in Houston packed in.
Nobody got sick.
Fucking Texas Rangers have been doing it since the beginning of baseball season.
Nobody's sick. So that's have been doing it since the beginning of baseball season. Nobody's sick.
So that's why they're doing this now.
Oh, maybe I am sick.
I sat next to a lady from Shanghai who had some live roosters on her lap.
Why do I taste my wife's hand cream?
It's a... What the... Oh, I know.
I put it on here.
Now it's in my mouth.
I feel gay.
Let's go.
You can resume activities without wearing a mask or staying six feet apart
except where required by federal, state, local, tribal.
Wow, Liz Warren's going to be in some deep shit.
Or territorial law rules and regulations, including local business and workplace guidance, the public health body said.
It added later that fully vaccinated people would still be required to wear a mask in health care settings
and on planes, buses, trains, other forms of public transportation,
while traveling into, within, or outside the United States.
Nothing's changed.
Watch out because I'm...
When I did have my mask on, I had my nose sticking out.
I took it off to eat my fucking,
not to eat,
I had three screwdrivers on the plane on the way home.
You know, after you have a big week
and you worked hard and everything,
I made some decent dough.
I just felt good about myself.
And it's weird,
because in the announcements,
they said there'll be no beverage,
blah, blah, blah,
and I was in first class.
By the way, first class, you know what that is now?
There's not even a divider on the plane I was on, of course.
It must have been a regional jet.
I paid an extra 70 bucks to sit in 1A.
It's just like all the rest of the seats.
No extra leg room and shit.
I get fucked in the ass is what I'm trying to say.
Anyways, let's stay on the COVID story, shall we, please?
As you know, I'm trying to teach myself guitar,
and the first couple songs, I love Clapton.
Absolutely love him.
You know, I got sunshine in your love.
I got the whole thing down,
and I got about 10 seconds of the solo left,
and I'm sure my wife will be happy.
I've been doing this since 1997, this song.
Eric Clapton, most dangerous drug wasn't heroin.
You know what it was?
It was the AstraZeneca vaccine he took.
I love it.
God, I like the guy even more now.
Eric Clapton has hit out at propaganda over vaccine safety,
claiming he suffered alarming side effects after his COVID jabs.
He is just pissed off.
I'm as mad as hell, I'm not gonna take this anymore!
I wonder if he'll
do a remake of Cocaine
and just call it Vaccine.
He's on my
he's on my
he's on my
Vaccine.
The legendary
guitarist, a septic...
A septic?
What the fuck is that supposed to mean?
Oh, it's a skeptic.
How did I get septic on it?
Isn't...
It's supposed to be a K, so I'm not the jerk-off.
Imagine some guy wrote that,
that wrote the article.
The legendary guitarist, a skeptic,
said his hands and feet became useless,
prompting fears he would never play again.
In a message to his music producer, he said,
I took the first jab of AstraZeneca
and straightaway had severe reactions, which lasted 10 days.
The 76-year-old said he recovered eventually, but now he has to play the tuba and won't get the pussy he was getting.
Now, he recovered eventually, but suffered further disastrous reactions six weeks later after the second shot.
I'm scared of this shit. That's why I'm not.
Maybe that's what happened to Biden on those steps. Lost control of his feet. He added my
hands and feet, excuse me, were either frozen, numb or burning and pretty much useless for two
weeks. I feared I would never play again.
I should never have gone near the needle.
This is what he was saying when he was on drugs.
This is terrific.
That's how old he is.
Now he's mainstreaming AstraZeneca.
Mainstreaming?
It's not even a drug term.
Mainlining.
Sorry.
I used to do that between my toes like Christopher Maltesanti.
But the propaganda said the vaccine
was safe for everyone.
The musician who is, he has
emphysema. God bless this guy.
Ended his email
to a, he's, ended
it or he sent it?
He sent it to Italian music mogul
Robin Manari Grazadea.
I don't even know who that is,
saying, I've been a rebel all my life
against tyranny and arrogant authority,
which is what we have now.
Absolutely.
I hope he writes a song about it
called Pelosi Dry Up and Die.
Clapton criticized the government early this year
in an anti-lockdown song.
Oh, he did.
He already wrote an anti-lockdown song
called Stand and Deliver. The song was a collaboration with Van Morrison. There he is,
Van Morrison, who looks like Roger Stone's drunk brother, who is also a critic of restrictions.
I love both those guys. But you see, they were hippies at one point, too. They always grow up
and come around. You know what I'm saying?
He was the best guy around.
Yes he was.
Yes he was.
Anyways, I had two gay Hispanic guys staying across from the hotel.
I was on a balcony with my phone and I caught them in a lover's quarrel.
Here's the footage.
Why do you keep saying perro?
Isn't perro a dog?
I know it's the word but.
Isn't it a dog, perro?
Yeah.
Perro, those weren't dogs. What that guy
was saying, he probably had money on the one on the left and was calling the other one
a dirty dog. They were thrown out of the hotel at my request. It just says video. That was the video.
Oh, I'm sorry.
I was supposed to do this.
Who's an animal?
Your mother's an animal, you son of a bitch!
Yeah, put that in later.
Goddamn it, I blew my... So anyways...
So there you go.
You got Van Morrison, right?
You got Clapton.
These are musicians.
They were heavy hippies,
which you're supposed to be in the 60s.
But now you got liberals getting pissed, you know,
for the most part.
That's how bad it's getting out there.
I don't know how the Democrats can think
they can keep up this pace of radicalization
and think they're going to win anything in the midterms.
Do you?
Maybe that's me.
And again, if they're using the same software
for the election, they're going to win.
But I'm sure we're taking care of that.
Excuse me.
That was chilly from Thursday night in Cleveland.
By the way, hilarity is a guy who runs it, Nick Costas,
originally from Brooklyn, 78 years old.
I punch him in the arm.
I almost broke my hand.
This guy's thinner than me.
He's got pipes sticking out of his T-shirt.
Been in the comedy business the whole time.
I hope you watch the show, Nick.
I didn't get back to you on the text.
But anyways, thank you for everything.
He has a restaurant.
He's a killer.
Let's get back to the news.
Never mind your fucking life, Nick.
Okay.
I'm sorry.
The headline here is statuary, not statutory, which is the Italian word for rape.
Statuary.
That was pretty funny.
Statuary rape, as in statue.
The cancel culture is now after Rosa Parks.
Holy Christ. Now, wait a minute. That's the first time I saw a close-up of Rosa Parks. She has a white person's nose. She should
have been sitting in the middle, not the back. That's how I do things. They were after Rosa
Parks, a black secretary who refused to give up her seat
to a cracker up in that motherfucker,
which touched off a civil rights movement
that ended second-class citizenship for black people.
She told that guy off.
Have you ever heard the audio of that?
What folks says about this family, I does.
I has told you and told you
that you can always tell a lady
but the way that she eat in front of folks like a bird.
And I ain't aiming for you to go to Mr. John Wilkinson's
and eat like a field hand and dabble like a hog.
And the white guy said, fuck it, take my seat.
You give me a headache.
Biden on Friday shoved Rosa Parks to the back of the bus.
You know why?
Because he's an old school racist Democrat
who pretends otherwise.
Ruth Ginsburg too, so he hates Jews.
And Harriet Tubman, who I knew personally.
Do you know my sister owned a house in, this is true, Andover, Mass.,
where it was built in 16-something, 1600.
The Underground Railroad went through her house.
She told us that while we were having Thanksgiving dinner. I go, I said, I'm out of here. Just to get laughs. You know, nobody laughed.
Anyways, Harriet Tubman as well. Imagine Biden going after three icons. The president late
Friday stopped plans to build statues honoring these three women and 241
other Americans.
Call it statuary rape.
You're raping me.
This is rape.
This is rape.
This is rape.
It is not.
It's removing a statue.
They didn't remove it.
He just nixed it.
Biden also removed President Trump's protection of existing federal statues. Not statutes, statues.
Do you believe that shit? You know how Trump was trying to protect them? How much can you hate the
country, Joe? I know it's not even you. I can see this coming out of AOC's big fucking horse teeth
and Bernie and all the leftist scum. Get out of our country, all right?
Get the fuck out.
And where are the people who build statues on the right?
I am tasting lotion right now like I just blew somebody.
Jesus, it's like soap in my mouth.
Anyways, Politico reported Biden rescinded
a pair of executive orders tied to the creation
of what former President Trump envisioned as a National Garden of American Heroes, one of which was signed on January 18th,
just days before Trump was set to leave office. Naturally, they went in and just, they don't even
care if what Trump did was right or wrong. They, you know, they just fucking nix everything.
That's Rosa Parks, I believe, right? That looks more like Elvis
in his bathrobe.
The now rescinded order
warned of dangerous anti-American
extremism and stated that the garden
really, that's a sign
of extremism, putting up famous
even Rosa Parks and shit.
You fucking people.
Stated that the garden would be Americans
Trump said, America's answer to this
reckless attempt to erase our heroes' values and entire way of life, which is, he was right with
that sentiment. In addition to seminal political and historical figures, Trump's garden would have
included an array of high-profile individuals, like basketball player Kobe Bryant,
individuals like basketball player Kobe Bryant, Jeopardy host Alex Trebek,
the guy that hosted The Apprentice.
They said he was going to be 10 of him.
And legendary baseball pitcher Cy Young.
And Ruth Buzzi.
And Ruth Buzzi.
Paul Lind. And Kevin Spacey in a diaper.
It was virtually assured that Biden would not move forward with the project, which was put forward in large part as a counter to last summer's racial justice protests
and the debate surrounding the removal of monuments to Confederate icons.
So Biden came in, and he did not like what he saw.
What are we doing?
You don't know.
What's going on right now?
I don't know.
Ask the people that have the hand up your ass there.
Ask your friend Geppetto.
We have another president like Obama who hates our country.
Biden's refusal to honor these men and women
shows how ashamed he is to be a fucking American.
Do you really think he even knows?
I swear to God.
I just picture him in a recliner with his slippers on.
Instead of putting his hand in warm water to make him piss himself, they just put a pen in his hand.
They go like that.
And he's just signing, putting, you know, yeah, it's close enough.
Because he was never this anti-American.
He was always a dope.
He was always a narcissist and a big ego, known as a dummy.
But he was never this anti-American.
Even his son was like a war hero.
Anyways, MAGA is a dirty word within the media in the deep state.
They do not want to make America great again.
They just sure as heck do not
wish to honor those who made America great. Think not? The Associated Press reported Biden's order
also revoked Trump's May 2020 order, calling for the Department of Justice and the Federal
Trade Commission to investigate social media companies for labeling or removing posts or entire accounts in what Trump claimed.
See who wrote this? He claimed it. It's the fact.
It was restriction on free speech.
That order came before Trump himself was removed from platforms like Twitter and Facebook
after the January 6th insurrection where a nameplate was broken
and a white girl was shot dead.
You fucking fucks.
Oh my God.
This smells like hand lotion.
What the fuck did I... Anyways, Biden passed all that legislation.
Let's hope he has prostate cancer.
I despise it with every fiber of my being.
The president also ended Trump's December 2020 order
to brand all U.S. foreign aid with a single logo.
He's still branding.
That embodies the values and generosity
of the American people.
We can't have that.
Get that out of there.
Do you understand?
I bet you some of the jerk-offs even agree with that.
But because it was Trump's idea. I
Know the squad those four hairy pigs that nobody would fuck they disagree with it
Nick why so crass? I don't know
My uncle touched me with a beer bottle on my sixth birthday, what do you want me to say?
Even my producers are blushing right now.
Can we get a fat, drunk girl in here to laugh at shit?
This, by the way, that's my dad's.
No, wait a minute.
No, it's not.
The dog tag's on it.
I get two of these.
I think my dad's is at home
anyways this is that flag that was frol that improperly now it's properly folded I used to
rack up balls on my pool table with this thing is that oh let me ask you a question I'm dead
serious because I have my dad's dog tags it only took my mother a year to figure out how to mail them, and am I allowed to wear, can you wear like,
is that disrespectful, do you think? Matt, what do you think? It's my dad, right? My wife's like,
I don't know, I think that's disrespect. What the fuck, I didn't steal them off a dead marine.
I don't know. Anyways, let's get back to it
oh my god
it tastes like I made a smoothie
with Juergens
it's fucking terrible
I must have had some
again I put it on this
did you just work on that or something? did I just it on this.
Did you just work on that or something?
Did I just work on it?
Yeah.
What do you mean?
Is it fresh?
The tattoo?
Well, six months.
But it looked very dry, you know.
I put that on my forearm and balls.
I know I didn't taste my balls.
I'm thinking, anyways.
By the way, my balls are shrinking, and that's not even a joke. You know how bodybuilders are gonna take steroids?
Testosterone's a steroid, essentially.
Which I'm, you know, steroid therapy.
I'm doing it like fucking Joe,
buddy Joe Rogan, and everybody else my age.
And I noticed my testicles.
I stare at them a lot.
And I go, what the fuck?
They used to hang nice.
My dick was, but my balls were always nice.
Now they're, it's fucking weird.
I call the doctor, and he's like joking about it.
And he's my wife's gynecologist, by the way.
So I go, what are you trying to make me an ex-female customer?
Am I going to grow a clit in a week?
What's going on?
And he's laughing.
Don't worry about it.
He's a used car salesman during the day, so I don't know if we should trust him.
Let's get on to more left-wing bias in the world and that's crushing people like me and anybody
who has a brain and you know who it is corporations and media I say corporations and media sitting in
a tree k-i-s-s-i-n-g-n-b-c left-wing news media corruption goes far beyond political bias explained
Breitbart news editor he's a great writer writer. Alex Marlow on Saturday previewing some revelations in his book.
He's got a new book, which I'm going to get.
Breaking the News, Exposing the Establishment Media's Hidden Deals and Secret Corruption.
That's a catchy title.
Ownership of America's largest news media companies by complex conglomerates
creates conflicts of interest in news media reporting.
I remember back in the 80s, Gannett, they called it, or Gannett,
they were a publisher, then they bought news stations,
and people were freaking out.
Now we have this all over the place.
He identified integration of news media outlets
into multi-billion dollar corporations as a cause of deepening industry corruption beyond bad faith claims of political neutrality.
So we know this.
This isn't news to us, right?
We know that they're working hand in hand, the networks and shit.
Do you remember the show Madam Secretary when that came out?
It was right when Hillary was running for president or was vice president.
I don't know.
But I said on one of my podcasts, I go, do you understand?
Do you understand that's like a love letter to Hillary to help her get elected or whatever?
And even some guy, I think he was a fan, was like, oh, you're getting a little paranoid.
I almost shit my pants.
This has been going on for fucking 50 years,
Hollywood and the government sucking each other's ass,
and he didn't pick up on that.
How do you not know?
All the shit you watch, whether it's movies, commercials,
it's all left-wing propaganda.
That's what the television was invented for.
The sitcoms and movies you watch, those are just to keep you tuning in.
But, you know, she was Secretary of State, Hillary,
and they made a show called Madam Secretary.
This guy was saying I was off.
And by the way, ever watch all those shows, Law & Order?
I'm going to get to that story.
It's coming up.
Well, Dick Wolf is the biggest communist in Hollywood.
And that shit's been running on a loop, Law & Order, for 20-something fucking years.
We'll get to him in a few seconds.
Parent companies of large news media properties weaponize their assets to enforce
compliance with their business interests, Marlowe held. Now, the enforcers of the anti-science mask
mandates will be the corporations because the corporations are getting increasingly left and
increasingly woke, he remarked. Most of the world, and that's what I'm talking about, like when you
go to a Marriott hotel chain, they're going to tell you to keep wearing them, right?
And what are you going to do? Say, I'm going to sleep
in the car?
Well, if we all did that, we could
stay away from the Marriott.
But even though you go on a red roof
in the middle of, like, Pennsylvania, there's three
people there.
Fucking get a mask up.
Anyways, most of the world
seems to be pretty coached up
on the fact that the establishment media is biased to the left.
That's a fact.
They have a liberal bias.
We all know that at this point.
If you don't, you scare me.
Jewel-calling us.
Me?
Fuck no.
I'm a flag saluting civilian, motherfucker.
He continued in the book Breaking the News,
I take it further and I connect the two.
Now it's no longer simply a liberal-conservative divide.
That is way too mild.
First of all, he says, the establishment is now weaponized.
They are now on the attack.
It is not merely that they're slanting the news.
They're directing their news specifically to get scalps, to get victories.
He means it's also what they admit. the shit that we don't get, right?
They omit stuff, well, you know, like a Biden, Hunter Biden story,
when the Post put that out there and they shut that down.
It's not just about them being liberal, he says.
It's also about them being globalists and corporatists,
because if you think about this, for example, NBC News, we all hate NBC News, right?
That's exactly right.
That's a sick question. You're a sick fuck, and I'm not that sick that I'm going to answer it.
But NBC News is part of NBC Comcast Universal, and it's only one branch on a very large corporate tree
with international interests all over the goddamn
world in a million different ways. You see? So their tentacles reach everywhere. It's
like cancer that metastasizes. It's just spreading. Right now it's in our tits and neck, but it's
going to head to our ass and feet. What? And action. News media reporting is shaped to
align with conglomerate owners' business interests,
Marlowe observed, warning that many news media outlets withhold or deny information, like the Biden Hunter story, viewed as potentially damaging to their corporate owners.
Again, we all know this.
Son of a whore!
In other words, so you won't put on, let's say there was a beating.
In other words, so you won't put on, let's say there was a beating.
Let's say three black guys beat up a white old lady in the parking lot of the Hilton.
You're not going to fucking hear about that.
The diversification of conglomerate owners' business interests narrows the range of acceptable reporting that subsidiary news media companies are allowed to pursue.
So when something conflicts with Comcast, right,
and their business, your local affiliate,
you're not gonna, they can't.
They get notes from on high saying don't,
in other words, don't pay attention to black crime.
Focus on that one white racist that did something bad.
See if you can find a million more of those.
The institutional flaw with the establishment media
is that they're all built on a lie,
which is they claim to be objective.
He's so goddamn right there.
Liar, liar, whore, liar, whore, you know it.
There's no such thing as objectivity because literally every decision we make
from which stories we cover to which ones we don't,
to who we interview and who we don't, to which quotes we use, which ones we don't, to who we interview and who we don't, to which quotes we
use, which ones we don't. Everything we do has the opportunity for the insertion of bias, either
intended or not. I've been saying that forever. That's why I wouldn't trust a jury. That's part
of us. And that's the only flaw
as far as our great democracy
and the founding fathers being so genius.
They didn't know,
because they had integrity and shit back then.
They didn't know that money
was going to trump everything
and people would sell their souls.
And bias gets annoying.
Just look at the fucking Supreme Court and look at some of the rulings And bias gets annoying.
Just look at the fucking Supreme Court.
And look at some of the rulings of the Ninth Appellate Court in San Francisco.
Just look at that.
All these judges came out of Ivy League schools.
They're as left as anybody.
They claim no bias. But this is why we're in the shitty place we are.
He added, Breitbart is almost the mirror reflection of that failed system and that we're built the proper way.
We are open and honest with our audience about what it is that we believe.
CNN claiming to their audience that they're objective.
See, CNN is objective.
An institutional flaw. They can't claim that if they were just honest uh that they were on the
other side that they're leftist and that they uh want the democrats to succeed and the republicans
to fail generally speaking then i think they would get a lot more credibility back
how long have we been saying that that's's why, like, everybody goes, I hate
when people lump in Fox News with CNN, which it's just fucking ridiculously unfair. MSNBC,
here's the thing about them. They're really, really left-wing, but they let you know they are.
They have a woman with an Adam's apple who gets the most views,
a haircut like me in high school,
but they tell you.
They don't try to hide the fact that they're propagandists,
but CNN, the world leader in news,
shut your fucking hole.
You have Darth Vader as your voiceover guy.
He said the only hope going forward for the media is independent voices. It's
going to be talk radio. It's going to be podcasts. Did you hear that? It's going to be podcasts.
It's going to be Substack. What's Substack, Matt? Like I was saying, it's going to be Substack.
It's going to be places like Bre Substack. It's going to be places
like Breitbart. It's going to be places
that are not having to answer
to corporate boardrooms
with whatever they... That's why this
is so important, folks. I'm not being self-serving
here. Shows like this.
Podcasts.
You know, when it first came out, people started
finding them annoying. Oh, everybody's got a
podcast. Guess what? We're going to need it because they've shoved us into this corner.
And even podcasts, you know, Buddy Rogan with his Spotify deal,
there's a bunch of shows that they won't put up that he did.
Whatever they choose to do, and once we see that,
the more honest our media will become.
So stay tuned.
We need podcasts.
Even if it's
two old ladies talking about spatula prizes.
What?
No idea.
I'm dressed like Ellen DeGeneres at a
wedding.
Including this.
You know who I love,
who I think is one of the smartest people on the planet?
I read his book, too.
Steve Bannon.
I think, thank God he was there at the beginning for Trump.
And Trump trusted him.
The guy's just, Steve Bannon's just one smart SOB.
Anyways, Bannon says,
elites aren't managing decline.
It's communist revolution.
What did he mean by that?
Well, he went on a rant on his very popular podcast.
See if you can follow along what he's talking about,
but it makes much sense.
Here's Steve Bannon.
Roll up.
Who betrayed this nation that got us in this mess that we're in today? And yes,
we're going to win and we're going to turn this around. But the lesson people have to
take from 1914 to 1989, the deplorables in this nation put their shoulder to the wheel
to destroy fascism and Nazism and the military hunter in Japan and the Soviets, the greatest threats we've ever had in the nation.
And now to turn out, you got the 14 1914 of WW one to 1989 when the wall fell.
That was guys like I don't say me, but I'm saying deplorables, what we call deplorables today.
Blue collar, hardworking.
He makes a great point.
We saved the world from communism and whatever the fuck.
And they're the ones, that's how you know the people, the elites.
That's how you know they're Marxists.
And they call us deplorables.
Blue-collar guys or whatever.
I keep saying they.
I wasn't involved.
I wasn't born yet in 1914.
A couple years after.
But I'm just saying, go ahead, let them run.
Chinese Communist Party everywhere and every institution and every political party.
They own Wall Street.
They own the global corporations.
And the globalists are sitting there shutting you down time and time again.
That's the question that's got to be answered.
Wake up, white people.
Don't you love him?
He knows his shot.
He was the best guy around.
He's still around.
What are you talking about?
Who said that?
I did.
He went on to say, once again, it'll be the deplorables who will save this republic.
He also said, we will win in November 2022, but we can't wait until then.
We have to fight this move by the left at the grassroots level with podcasts by Nick DiPaolo and stand-up shows by Nick DiPaolo.
by Nick DiPaolo and stand-up shows by Nick DiPaolo.
Because we are on the verge
of a Marxist revolution right now.
That's what he is saying.
And he's absolutely right.
Get his book, by the way.
See how he grew up and stuff.
But here's my only disagreement.
He keeps saying, you know, we're going to smoke him in 2022, the midterms.
Again, I'll say it for the 80th time.
I have to go on national TV and bring up this point.
Is Dominion Computers going to be involved?
What are we going to use, punch cards?
Somebody tell me.
I'm asking that.
Not being, it's a sincere question.
I'm not being a wise ass.
Are we fixing the computer shit?
At one of my shows, Cleveland, a fan of mine, apparently,
I think he was a Hispanic kid, I mentioned
how the election was stolen.
This kid yells out, oh, the big lie.
I go, oh, wow.
So I see you're getting the memo, too, that the Democrats get to use that line, the big lie.
The big lie, by the way, what they're saying is when Trump says it was stolen, which is not a big lie.
We have more proof than you can handle.
The big lie actually was how you use COVID to make up COVID to get Biden elected. That's the big fucking lie.
So I started to, you know, back and forth with him during the show. And he comes up to me after,
gives me a hug and shit. And I just thought I had to yell that out. He said, no, you didn't
have to yell. You made an asshole of yourself. But anyways, here's a signed hat. No, he's a sweet kid, actually. But do
you see? Brainwashed, again. I don't know if it was Zelensky. One of those leftists,
Stalin. Pick any fucking jerk up. Who said, you know, when they stumble onto what you're
trying to do, the truth, just call them conspiracy theorists, you know? And the idiots who watch CNN buy that shit. The big
lie.
Trump having the election so it's a
big lie. Even though we have surveillance,
this is where I get them every time.
I go, so what were those surveillance cameras
with trucks pulling up at 6 in the
morning?
Was that made up? Or when they
asked political pollsters to step out
that watch the polls
to be 100 yards away,
or the cardboard on the windows in Detroit,
what's that about?
Does anybody in the media ask those fucking questions?
It was stolen.
It was stolen.
It was stolen.
He's still the president.
Biden's not my president or anybody else.
It was stolen. What? It was stolen. He's still the president. Biden's not my president or anybody else. It was stolen.
What? It was stolen. Trump won in the biggest landslide ever. If you don't like that, suck it.
It's all coming out. What's going on with that audit, by the way, in Arizona? Can we get some
numbers to back up my shit? All right. Well, I'll tell you who believes that it was stolen, just like me.
This woman.
God damn it.
You guys, you know who Marjorie Taylor Greene is, right?
She's that firecracker from the South when she was running for Congress.
She had a rifle in her hand, half her ads and stuff. You know what? I'm liking her more and
more every time we see her. The video shows Rep Greene, this is a tweet she put out, speaking to
reporters in front of the Capitol building in Washington. A reporter asked, can you tell me
about why you think it's so important to ask Rep Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez for a debate.
And she says she feels threatened by it.
And here's the thing.
Listen, I want you to listen out of everything, if you get anything out of this clip,
listen to the adversarial tone that these press women take.
They don't even know their job is to not to take a side.
This might as well have happened on a street corner or at a diner between friends.
One who votes Democrats and one who votes...
Do you understand what I'm saying?
They don't even know what they're supposed to do.
They're like, why do you think AOC, you know, why do you think...
Listen to the adversarial...
They don't even hide.
They don't even try to hide that they hate women like Miss Green.
Roll the tape.
Hi. to hide that they hate women like uh miss green roll the tape hi um so can you tell me about uh why you think it is so important to
ask representative alexandria ocasio-cortez for a debate and she says that she feels threatened by
it so she feels threatened to be able to discuss the policy of the Great New Deal.
Is that what she's saying?
The manner of which you can picture it.
There's nothing wrong with the manner.
Here, I'll explain something that I was just talking about up there.
Since I have been a member of Congress, I have been kicked off of my committees by the
Democrats when there were no ethics violations against me.
Not one.
I did nothing wrong.
You know what else happened?
Representative Cori Bush attacked me in the tunnel, screaming at me. Not one. I did nothing wrong. You know what else happened? Representative
Cori Bush attacked me in the tunnel, screaming at me, screaming. I never said a word to her.
She goes by screaming at me to put on a mask. That's a verbal assault. You want to know what
else happened? The delegate from Guam marches the National Guard on my office. Can you imagine
on a woman's office, a female member of Congress? I had
over 30 National Guard marched on my office by the delegate of Guam. Thank God I wasn't
in there. What else happened? Marie Newman, that lives across the hall from me, she shoulder
checked me right there inside in front of the Capitol Police yesterday. And she went by, hit my shoulder, and said, excuse me.
She said nothing back and kept going up the floor.
Pause.
Can you fucking imagine?
And you know that's all true.
Actually bumping into her.
And you hear the twat in the blue shirt?
Just not even looking for, not trying to be objective whatsoever.
Why'd you ask her to do that?
Why that?
Let it roll.
God, it gives me a headache.
Today, Eric Falwell, my staffer, nicely says to him,
Congressman, you don't have to wear your mask anymore.
Because what Biden said yesterday, he chases my staffer inside, everybody saw it,
and gets in his face, curses at him saying you don't tell me what to do.
This is the Democrats are the party of aggression and violence. We have AOC, Ilhan Omar,
Rashida Tlaib publicly and on their social media and speaking on the House floor supporting Hamas
terrorists who are attacking Israel
with rocket fire after rocket fire, and they're supporting the terrorists.
They're also supporting Antifa and BLM terrorism all over the country.
And then I get harassed by the press every single day about January 6th,
and I've said the entire time, literally starting on that day, during the riot, how much I'm upset by it, how much I'm against it, and how appalled at it that I am.
I was a victim of it as well.
So if we want to talk about assault, if we want to talk about aggressive behavior, you need to be interviewing the Democrats.
All right, that's enough.
That's enough.
Amen.
Imagine getting bumped and Cori Bush, that angry black broad,
cursing her out because she didn't have a mask on.
Can you fucking imagine?
And what are these dumb... By the way, is the whole media now just junior college chick graduates
who know shit?
The girl closest to the camera,
I was watching her the whole time. She's looking around.
She has a attention span of a crack baby because she's not
interested in what a Republican has to say.
Ugh.
Yeah, so why'd you have to be
that fucking tone from
Ugh.
That's how
she should have responded.
You're a loser.
You'll always be a loser!
Anyways, ladies and gentlemen,
that is it.
Good to be back.
Again, thank all of you
who came out to all my shows.
It really was.
It really rejuvenates me. You know how many
people when I go, there's a crowd of 400, I go, how many people listen to this show,
watch this show? I mean almost the whole goddamn crowd. It's, it's, we have a movement
here. Not a bowel movement, an actual movement. It was so good and, and, and you
don't have to bring me gifts.
Because when I get a thing of whiskey,
I have to drink the whole thing,
but they'll take it away at the airport.
Now, that was sweet, by the way.
Again, thank you guys so much.
Don't forget thecomicsgym.com.
That's where this show will always reside,
regardless of who comes after me.
Don't forget nickDip.com.
Click on the tour dates to see me live.
And don't forget Cameo.com.
If you want me to roast one of your friends or relatives, go to Cameo.com.
Click on my profile.
Tell me a little bit about the person.
I'll make a video on my phone roasting that person or saying happy birthday.
Whatever.
Make the day, break the day. You decide, and I'll send it video on my phone roasting that person or saying happy birthday, whatever. Make the day, break the day.
You decide, and I'll send it right to them.
Anything else, Matt?
Have I forgotten anything?
Nailed it.
Got it all.
Again, thank you guys so much for tuning in.
You guys think it, I will say it.
You're very welcome.
We'll see you back here at the same time tomorrow.
Have a good day, everybody. guitar solo We'll see you next time.