The Nick DiPaolo Show - Colleges Prove Covid a CROCK
Episode Date: September 9, 2020Wounded vet Bobby Henline fires back at leftist propaganda. Covid crock collapses in collegiate cases. Trump's biggest financier? The Donald, of course....
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Hey guys, Nick DiPaolo here. The election, the big one's coming up real quick on us.
It's probably the biggest one in the history of this country. They always say that,
but I think we know it's true this time. If you're watching the news lately,
well, one of the news channels, the rest of them are lying to your fucking face.
That's why you should come here and get your news from me. But people like me are being squashed by YouTube and everybody else not yet but
they're on my heels
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And, uh, if you're on YouTube, don't forget to click that button and make sure you stay subscribed.
All right. It's very important. It's the truth. Oh, yeah.
How are you, folks?
Welcome to the show.
The beautiful state of Georgia.
And real quickly, it's Raz's last day today.
Jason, who was the original producer,
stayed in Savannah.
He's got a broad, stayed here.
Thank God for that broad.
He'll be living in his parents' basement right now,
but he is there. And Raz, this is it for Raz.
His wife got a great job.
We mentioned this earlier.
And she's a pharmacist.
What can you do about Viagra? Can you send me a
couple bushels of that shit? I eat it like Flintstone vitamins. So um Raz come
over here let's take a I want to get Raz on camera before he goes because he
really took us from B to C. This is the man we're losing right here. Seriously.
Yeah, but black and white people
hate each other, right?
Please, look at him.
Could be from the cast of fucking What's Happening.
Who's with
me here? Raz, seriously
man,
you took us from B to C, and I
hate fucking lose you. Jason is more
than capable, but I'm just saying.
Yeah.
You know?
It's better when I make black jokes and there's a black guy in the room.
You know what I'm saying?
I know what you're saying.
But beautiful house.
I saw the picture of his house.
I didn't realize we were paying him that much.
You're not.
I know.
You get other things.
He sells drugs.
Like, you know what the black people do. But're not. I know. You got other things. He sells drugs. Like, you know,
you know the black people, though.
But this is Raz, folks.
And he was very shy
about coming on camera
because he has some street cred
that was just blown just now
in the North Carolina community.
But, brother man.
Hey, thank you.
Seriously, you're the fucking balls.
And we might keep you involved somehow.
You know what I mean?
I hope so.
I'm hoping this race riot kicks off and you can report you involved somehow. You know what I mean? I hope so. I'm hoping this race riot kicks off
and you can report from both sides.
And he brought in some delicious whiskey today,
which I've had two cups in, you know, my coffee,
doing it Irish style.
But yeah, you're the best, bro.
Seriously, man.
Let's stay in touch.
I will.
Seriously.
I will.
And I appreciate being on the show
and Tommy and Sherry and you.
Good people. Yeah. But will. And I appreciate being on the show and Tommy and Sherry and you. Good people.
Everybody's been good, yeah.
Yeah.
But we found, Tommy found Raz and it was like, holy Jesus.
He had, you know, he's a hustler.
He's got another podcast and he's tight with a mayor in Savannah.
Yeah.
And who's colored.
And, you know, this shit is delicious.
What are we drinking?
Wood Reserve?
It's Probably Ripple
Who's he shit?
All right, brother
Same here, love your ass
All right, Jason, how are you?
Good to have Jason back too
Because let me give you a quick rundown on Jason
He showed up at our house
When we were looking
When I was doing the show from my basement
And he learned all this shit in about a week Jason, he showed up at our house when we were looking, when I was doing the show from my basement.
And he learned all this shit in about a week.
And there was another kid with him named Ryan who was, I don't know if they were life partners.
We kicked him out.
Kind of a perverted kid.
We didn't know what he was up to.
No, but he was great too.
Anyways, enough of the dick sucking.
Let's get to the show.
Oh, glasses. enough of the dick sucking let's get to the show oh glasses first of all i want to thanks as always to those you guys who pick up nick topalo uh you know hats and mugs and shirts get all that stuff
at nickdip.com i get this photo sent to me from mike marucci yesterday it's actually a shirt
from our friends at the donald stuff.com check this out this has been the best picture so far
that dog would hump my leg if he met me thedonaldstuff.com. Check this out. This has been the best picture so far.
That dog would hump my leg if he met me.
You know that dog votes Republican. Look at him. Not some faggy little poodle.
It's a fucking dog with a head like Trump. Look at the wedding picture on the right. They've probably been divorced for four years now because of the dog.
But look at that dog. He's foaming at the mouth. He's looking at Pelosi's tits.
Thank you so much, Mr. Marucci. Excellent. Thanks. Thank also to those of you guys who
chat live during the show at 5 p.m. And we really appreciate those of you who submit super chats.
Here's some of my upcoming tour dates.
October 2nd and 3rd, and it's coming fast.
Jonathan's in Agunquit, Maine.
October 10th, Stand Up Live, Huntsville, Alabama.
October 11th, Zany's Comedy Club in Nashville, Tennessee.
November 19th, The Improv, Raleigh, North Carolina.
So go to nickdip.com for technical information.
Good to be here. I'm in a good mood and you know, we're going to have a good show today. I want all of you to enjoy your cake.
So, enjoy.
You know you want crazy
motherfucking wop. Hey, watch it. That's racist. I have Nick
the pig as a friend. Hey, watch it. That's racist. I have Nick the pig as a
friend. Fuck you, Michelle.
That's the broads I always got.
Always the fucking hot ones with the stinky
my shit doesn't stink attitude.
Here's a
I've been telling you COVID's a bunch
of caca poopoo peepee, right?
I hope you believe it. Well, here's some more facts
based on science, Joe Biden,
that it's a crock of shit.
You guys are being played.
It's social engineering.
Europe, do you know that Europe
has a second wave of COVID?
And you know what they said?
Fuck it, we're staying open.
Schools, businesses,
because they realize it's like a bad cold
unless you're unhealthy to begin with.
So take off your mask. People riding by my house on bikes by themselves with a mask on.
That's virtue signaling. You just you've been a douchebag since fifth grade and I haven't even met
you. Brown University epidemiologist finds zero hospitalizations from 26,000 positive COVID tests for college
students. Did you hear that? Zero hospitalizations. College kids.
Hey, everybody, we're all going to get laid.
It would make sense for colleges to treat their students like prisoners if those on campus were
demonstrably public health risk. Yet the data so far shows the exact opposite.
Brown University epidemiologist Andrew Bostom tweeted Tuesday
that he had tallied up just over 26,000 students testing positive for COVID-19,
which itself may double count the same person for multiple tests,
based on reported figures from 29 universities,
all but three public,
stretching from the east all the way to Arizona.
Yet he could not find a single, I'll repeat,
not find a single reported hospitalization
among those supposedly infected students.
PCR tests are notoriously prone to produce false positives
given that they catch even inactive viral fragments.
Do you believe this, fucking Biden?
You can't handle the truth.
Do you remember the football team?
Who was it?
Remember a couple weeks ago, Rez?
They had 27, somebody in the NFL had 27 positive tests.
It might have been baseball, I don't know. But it turns out they were
all false.
How much more evidence do you guys need to
know you're being played like a fiddle?
Rather than recognizing the
detection of mild cases among
college students as a
portents of good news, universities
continue to sow panic
for no good reason. Daniel
Horowitz writes. Daniel Horowitz writes.
Daniel Horowitz, he's a Jew.
You know he's right.
Smart people.
I always go to Jew doctors.
Those are Indians.
It's a true story.
How is this an emergency, Horowitz writes?
How is this an emergency situation?
If anything, the fact there are so many cases is a blessing because with such young population, these cases are de facto vaccine creating herd immunity without danger.
You are correct, sir.
He denounces Ohio for forcing even students who test negative to be quarantined and letting their schools control visits from their parents.
Even kids who test negative.
Do you not believe you're being played?
Hey, college kids, I don't know if you watch my show,
go nuts.
Get on Tinder, fuck everything that moves,
girls and guys, anything in between.
Just film it because they'll say you raped them.
Wear a mask.
Nobody will be able to recognize you.
Just say, I was protecting myself.
You heard the data.
He says, Horowitz says, this is a mandate for de facto prison for an, all for an epidemic
built on false or notional positives
with no health risk beyond the ordinary bugs
that spread on campus every year.
That includes chlamydia, I hope.
That was my favorite, chlamydia.
You wake up after, you know,
after banging somebody a week later
and there's like green slime.
Remember that shit?
Stain your underwear, you just wipe it off and go fuck i'm going to
a club tonight cut to your phone ringing off the hook you fuck me and gave me some type of things
it's becoming self-evident every week that the virus that is really spreading is an incorrigible
psychosis this guy is so right on the money rather than confining our youth for a cold that might not even spread in its asymptomatic form,
this guy is so right on.
Perhaps it's time to start confining some of the public health officials to a mental health facility.
I love this guy.
You're the fucking problem.
That's right.
You fucking Dr. White, onking jam rag, onking spunk bubble.
I'm telling you, H, you keep looking at me, I'm going to put you in the fucking ground.
I promise you.
Not this time.
That's right.
That goes out to Fauci.
This guy's been wrong more times than Al Roker, for fuck's sake.
I don't know.
I might make you sick.
We should stop shaking hands.
But no, if you want to bang somebody on Tinder, that's fine.
Guy's been all over the fucking map.
And he knows Bill Gates' old man.
Do you know that?
Do you know that?
There's pictures of him and Bill Gates' old man.
You know how much money they can make from this?
Bill Gates, who exists now.
Fucking weasel.
No wonder why he lived in Seattle.
Hey, Jace. Jace? hey jace jace jace speak up can you hear me yeah weren't we supposed to do a fucking uh i guess i didn't put it on the top of my stories we got it though we got the guy get well this is
how we're gonna open the guy pissing on a
trump sign this is beautiful the only reason i don't like this clip it wasn't real ammunition
but this is what it's coming to um someone's messing with your signs What the fuck?
Fuck you.
Fuck out of here.
Fuck you.
Fuck you.
Fuck you. I see him running. fuck out of here fuck you fuck you fuck you
i don't know if that's staged or not what do you think jason you're a young kid does that look
staged uh it was awfully well lit i thought i saw a boom mic over the suspect but uh either way it
sends a message don't fuck with the Trump signs, okay?
Are there any reported things of Trump fans pulling Biden signs on?
If there is, every one of those is 20,000 like this.
So I don't know, but it was paintballs or pepper spray, whatever.
I say rubber bullets.
Why do you say that, Nick?
Because rubber bullets every once in a while kill somebody.
The Red Sox won a World Series in 2013, I think it was,
and the celebration the next day in Kenmore Square,
a riot broke out, cops used rubber bullets,
hit one girl in the eye, she dead.
I'm not condoning that.
She didn't deserve it unless she had a Yankees hat eye. She did. I'm not condoning that. She didn't deserve it unless
she had a Yankees hat on. But listen, speaking of bullets, you know who Rick Wilson is?
He's a washed up pundit on the left. I think he's at MSNBC now. He was a political consultant
and a strategist. One time he was a Republican. I don't know what the fuck happened to him. He's a
real Trump hater and he's on MSNBC, need I say any more. But as you know, the left keeps saying
how violent, this is the biggest myth yet about fucking right-wing militias, about this country
being white supremacists, that they're the violent ones. Remember when Trump got elected, they were saying it was Trump people starting shit.
And in the last four years,
the left and this jerk off Rick Wilson at MSNBC
has, they're the biggest hypocrites.
Here's a little montage of who's really for the violence,
including politicians.
I just don't even know why there aren't uprisings
all over the country.
Maybe there will be. People need to
start taking to the streets. This is
a dictator. Suck a dick and die.
There needs to be unrest in the streets for as long as there's
unrest in our lives. Pause. I hope that's a cancer
haircut. I hope
that's fucking, she has a tumor the
size of a grapefruit right
under her fucking net geotits.
Go ahead.
Enemies of the state.
Show me where it says that protests are supposed to be polite and peaceful.
Do something about your dad's immigration practices, you feckless cunt.
Pause, you feckless cunt.
I wouldn't fuck you with Jason's dick, you ugly.
She's wearing something from the Carmelo Soprano collection.
Alright, go ahead, Jack.
How do you resist the temptation
to run up and wring her neck?
Biggest terror threat in this country.
Pause. I saw cock.
I
saw cock and I
love it. Yum, yum.
Look at that stupid haircut, those
faggy eyebrows.
He's an out-and-out racist.
What's worse than being a racist fag?
Go ahead.
His white men, most of them radicalized to the right.
I thought he should have punched him in the face.
Pause.
I think we should remove your clit with a fucking bottle opener.
What do you think of that, Miss Wallace?
I'd like to say what Mel Gibson
said to his girlfriend,
but that would be racist.
Go ahead.
He insulted your wife.
Yes.
He came down the escalator
and called Mexicans rapists and murderers.
He said, well, what do you think
I should have done?
I said, I think you should have
punched him in the face
and then gotten out of the race.
He would have been a hero.
Fuck you.
I'd like to punch him in the face.
Fuck you, mother.
That's what, take him behind the gym
and beat the hell out of him.
Punch some people in the face.
When was the last time an actor assassinated a president?
Pause.
I don't know, and if you did it, we still wouldn't know.
Fucking pirate fag.
Do some more heroin and beat your girlfriend, you shit stain.
This is Rick Wilson. Go ahead.
I'm going to have to go out and put a bullet in Donald Trump, and that's a fact.
This is Rick Wilson. Go ahead.
I have to go out and put a bullet in Donald Trump, and that's a fact.
Look as his character is stabbed to death.
Where is John Wilkes Booth when you need him? Is that a puppet act?
That's it right there.
It's the last time we saw her.
An awful lot about blowing up the White House.
A Missouri state senator is under investigation
by the Secret Service after saying she hopes
President Trump is a...
Talk your mother!
Go and take Trump out tonight.
And if you see anybody from that cabinet
in a restaurant, in a department store...
At a gasoline station.
At a gasoline station, you get out and you create a crowd.
Pause. Pause. Black people are just violent. Gasoline station. You get out and you create a crowd. Pause.
Pause.
Black people are just violent.
I'm kidding.
There was whites in there too.
But I'm just saying,
she's saying gather crowd.
Who is,
all we've been hearing
is about white supremacy
and how fucking hateful
this country is.
Look where all the threats
of violence are coming from.
Nancy Pelosi said
there should be an uprising.
Go ahead.
And you tell them they're not welcome anymore, anywhere.
And sadly, the domestic enemies to our voting system and our honoring our Constitution are right at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue.
They're not going to stop before Election Day in November and they're not going to stop after election.
And that should be everyone should take note of that on both levels, that this isn't they're not going to let up and they should not.
If you think we're rallying now, you ain't seen nothing yet.
And I'll tell you another thing.
Frankly, you're beginning to smell.
Where's my clock, guys?
Thank you.
That's good.
Do you believe that shit?
Can you imagine?
They had a play on Broadway where Trump gets simulated stabbing.
Should have done that with Obama.
Fake lynching.
How would that, you think that would have got any coverage on CNN, MSNBC?
Politicians, Maxine Waters, fucking Pelosi.
There are homeless women on the streets that have more sense than those two pig faces.
But they're literally calling for violence and shit.
Well, you're going to get it.
I'll state it once again because I'm staying with my buddy staying at the house, a 32-year veteran of the Miami police.
He's been through riots.
He's seen everything.
He's gone undercover at white supremacist meetings.
He's gone undercover at white supremacist meetings, and he says, oh, God, if this kicks off, you have no idea what the white supremacists are capable. He just told me about drones they have that they can drop on built like the military and blow.
And I'm just saying Antifa.
George Soros.
Anarchists.
Tread lightly.
You have no idea what you're getting into.
Not to mention everybody in the suburbs has 12 to 15 guns.
That's why I'm comfortable with this,
because I'm on the side of the people that believe in guns
and go to the shooting range.
You'll be throwing Molotov cocktails.
You'll be putting Sunoco SU-2000 in a fucking Sprite can and sticking a sock in it.
And they'll be shooting at you with AR-15s.
Good luck.
Anyways, Rick Wilson, you are a disgrace.
Do you know that Donald Trump and Joe Biden tied in a Florida poll as 2020 race tightens. President
Trump and Biden are tied
in a new NBC News
Marist poll of Florida voters
and the latest sign of a tightening
race. I fucking love it.
Alrighty then. For months
Trump
for months Trump has lagged behind
Biden in national and swing state polls
but recent surveys especially in Midwest battlegrounds, show him gaining on Biden.
The Florida poll of likely voters found 48 percent support for both Trump and Biden.
The Democratic candidate is one point down among registered voters.
The poll results released as Trump travels to Florida.
I guess he traveled there, it says
Tuesday.
Wasn't he in North Carolina last night?
Indicate that Trump gained significant support among Hispanic voters since 2016, but he's
at risk of losing his edge among retirees.
No, he isn't.
They'll come around to.
Do you really think the fucking people in their 80s are watching those riots and go i'm
gonna get out there fucking break some heads give me my fucking gun oh george don't go out there
there's colored people on the lawn i don't give a shit my father hated him and i hate him
among senior citizens the nbc poll found Trump with 48% support to Biden's 49%.
In 2016, listen to this, Trump carried Florida seniors by 17 percentage points, according to exit polls.
In another massive swing, this is the one that makes my dick harder than a shark's tooth,
Trump leads among Florida Hispanics 50% to 46%, according to the NBC.
Despite losing the demographic by 27 points to Hillary in 2016.
How's that for a swing?
How is that for a swing, ladies and gentlemen?
I am excited. You should be excited too.
Hey, everybody, we're all gonna get laid
Trump's poll performance recently improved across the midwest after summer polls showed him at risk
of a devastating loss to Biden and Russ belt states that broke for him in 2016 which is very
important there's a lot of swing stakes uh three public polls released last week show Trump within the margin of error or tied
with Biden in Pennsylvania. You're just voting for him because he's white. No, I'm voting for
him because he's white. He's got blonde hair, blue eyes, he's Christian.
Just like black people voted for Obama, they came across with.
And if I was black, I would have voted for Obama too.
But Nick, all the other presidents before Obama were white.
Yeah, because they're the best at doing the shit.
Don't worry, if Biden wins this, they'll invoke the 25th Amendment. Everybody will agree he's not fit to run the country. And then Kamala Harris, fake black woman, will step in. And somebody will give her a tit twister and she'll sue that guy.
Tuesday told a small group of reporters that internal campaign polls showed Trump narrowly ahead in Arizona.
He was just behind last week in Arizona.
And you know why this is, folks?
It's all the violence on television.
All those people sitting on the fence.
And by the way, when they poll people, Trump voters won't admit that they're going to vote.
Most, a lot of them don't admit they're going to vote because they don't want to put up with the rash shit um but he's heading arizona now i would be very
nervous if i'm the democrats public polling in both arizona and nevada who he was losing back
then two weeks ago uh trump uh no poll public polling in both arizona and nevada indicate
trump is losing did it just say before?
What am I missing here, Jason?
Internal campaign polls show Trump narrowly ahead.
Oh, that's an internal campaign poll.
All's we know that in Vegas, he's minus 130.
And let me tell you something.
In Vegas, those numbers are important. They don't get those wrong.
But it also says that the Milwaukee Brewers are going to win the World Series.
They have 42 games out.
Trump allies and some pollsters believe he may benefit from secret supporters
who won't publicly admit, that's what I just said,
they back Trump but will show up on election day.
Here's the problem, ladies and gentlemen.
I don't believe he's down in Reno and Vegas either. Do you? It's a bunch of horseshit.
Here's the problem. We're not going to know who won forever. Thanks to the Democrats and
their mail-in ballots. And do you understand they're already doing a preemptive strike?
They're already conditioning this country,
the idiots who vote Democrat,
that if Trump wins, they're already conditioning
that he will have stolen.
So I'm a little nervous.
Either way, let's say Biden wins,
which I don't think he's going to.
If he did, though, we're a socialist shithole overnight.
If Trump wins, they're going to turn up the violence in the streets.
Are they not?
You saw what they tried to do to him the last four years.
Tommy saw it.
Raz saw it.
Jason was watching porn with his girlfriend. He didn't see it. Raz saw it. Jason was watching porn with his girlfriend.
He didn't see it.
This probably interests Tommy because Tommy's a money guy.
President Donald Trump has discussed spending as much as 100 mil of his own money
on his reelection campaign if necessary to beat biden according
to people familiar with the matter i would tell anybody outside the family what you're thinking
again people familiar with the matter could you be a little more broad with that statement
i'm familiar with it for fuck's sake sake. My fucking dog, Charo, actually watches the news.
She has Biden minus one in Arizona.
The billionaire president has talked about the idea with multiple people,
though he hasn't committed to any self-funding,
according to people briefed on internal deliberation.
I've never heard that from people familiar with the matter.
That rules out MSNBC and CNN.
Though Trump personally contributed $66 million to his 2016 campaign,
it would be unprecedented if an incumbent president
could put his own money toward winning a second term.
Of course it would be unprecedented because he's the first fucking businessman.
of course it would be unprecedented because he's the first fucking businessman.
He's the first guy who was hugely successful in the private sector to be dumb enough to get into fucking politics.
If I, Trump said, if I have to, I would.
Trump said, putting money into his campaign, but we don't have to, he says.
He told reporters as he departed the Joint Base Andrews outside Washington,
he said he would spend whatever it takes if he winds up self-funding.
Tim Murtaugh, a person familiar with the matter.
What's Trump in third grade with that desk in 1850 the fuck is that looks like something
fucking uh don jr made in woodshop it gave to him for his birthday tim murtaugh a trump campaign
spokesman declined to say whether there's been any consideration of using the president's personal
fortune to help fund his re-election's fundraising is breaking records. We are paying close attention to the budget, allowing us to invest twice as much
from now until election day than we did in 2016. President Trump has also built the world's
greatest digital fundraising operation, a dominant ground game. That's where he's killing Biden.
He's got people knocking on doors everywhere. And a third advantage, Joe Biden can never match enthusiasm, which is true.
You know, the Dems are notorious for not showing up on Election Day because a lot of them are young kids who smoke weed and they're out the night before.
That fucking, you know, Arby's getting blown in the park.
I don't know what they do, but they're too tired to get up.
And then you get all black people just on, you know, Nick, what are they?
I don't know. They're busy.
But listen to this.
Earlier Tuesday, Trump said on Twitter that his campaign had to spend a lot of money
to combat what he called false reporting, which he's fucking absolutely right.
Can you stay categorical?
You are fake news.
Sir, on his handling of the coronavirus, most Americans disapprove of his management of the pandemic.
Polls have shown Trump's reelection effort, including the Republican National Committee,
has spent more than 800 million so far, while Biden.
It's good. Good to see we got money out of politics.
so far while biden it's good good to see we got money out of politics huh 800 mil mama mia do you know how much fucking fresh pasta that would buy
well biden and the democrat national committee spent uh 414 mil through july
but biden and the dnc raised 365 million in August, shattering a previous record, one-month record, of $193 million set by Barack Hussein.
I set off a race war in the United States, Obama, in 2008.
Biden had $294 million in cash and left it at a bus stop
in a bag
on the way home
from the 5 o'clock special.
At the end of July, he had $294 million in cash.
$6 million less than Trump's re-election effort.
Imagine fucking trust Biden with that money.
What are we doing? What's going on right now? We're buying the election for you, stupid. You're going to get
into office. You're going to be the president for 30 seconds. And we're going to pretend we're
going to have you give a speech and fall down the stairs and pretend you broke your neck.
And then we can have a Jamaican slash. What is she? Indian, a Jamaican slash, what is she? Indian. A Jamaican slash Indian as the first black woman.
You know, black people have proved they can run a lot of governments. Just look around the world.
Nick, that's racist. I don't give a fuck. I'm for the truth. Look at this stupid.
He looks like a puppet. He looks like George.
Does he not look like a puppet right there?
AOC has her hand up his ass.
Say this.
What do you got there?
Oh, no.
Tommy likes the show today.
Say goodbye to my liver.
Raz brought this in.
What a great show we have.
He's leaving and he brings us a gift.
Woodford Reserve.
Holy shit, Raz.
I thought, you know, I don't mean to stereotype you,
but I thought we were going to get a bottle of Ripple or fucking,
I don't know, Purple Drank.
I thought he was going to bring in purple grape juice and fucking Robitussin.
The kids love it at the clubs
purple drank this shit is really smooth wood woodford reserve i say there can we get tommy
get these people on board thank you as very much new mug by the way tommy was telling me about a
patron who had a problem we have a smaller size mug on this one way. Tommy was telling me about a patron who had a problem.
We have a smaller size mug on this one.
And the guy was upset because this didn't hold.
The 15 ounces.
And what part of Israel was he from?
Nick, that's horse shit.
You shouldn't say shit like that.
I know.
It's just a joke.
I have a summer home in the West Bank.
Back to the news.
I have no idea where I was after that shot.
Trump and the RNC have yet to release their fundraising numbers for August.
They said they raised 76 mil during the four days of the RNC convention last month.
76 mil.
See, that's what I want to do with T-shirts and hats.
The campaign will have twice as much money in 2016
and new outside groups.
That's enough.
He's not going to need any.
That's funny because I sent them $50.
I thought I was sending it to Trump
and I sent it to that
Steve Scalise
I got shot on the baseball field
it started out like hi
they had Trump's fucking
signature all over the
I haven't given it to Trump yet
$50
it's going to go to Scully
so he can buy a new bag for his hip.
Speaking of people who were shot,
this was...
The fucking left is just evil.
And I think this story
really proves it.
Retired Army
Staff Sergeant Bobby
Henline, who was severely burned and lost part of an arm while
serving in iraq has called out a meme that used his image to promote a donald trump anti-military
narrative which came out of the the atlantic that publication can you imagine people still
read that shit he responded by posting a now a viral video.
Check this out.
OK, can I get a day's rest?
Is this election over with yet?
Are we done lying to people?
You hear it on the news all the time about people lying, fake news.
That's my face.
I'm here to tell you.
It's not true
look at that
people
stop using me
for your propaganda
for your agenda
I'm not here for that
Rachel Maddow's involved with that
to her I say
shut your fucking mouth
shut the fuck up, you cunt.
Go ahead.
But I'm sure he didn't call me a loser.
I didn't hear him call me a loser.
So this has got to stop.
Stop using my image.
Fox News, call me somebody.
Let's get this out there on a bigger platform so people would know not to use me not to put a face to
whatever this is they think he said it's ridiculous let's stop the shit let's move on
i'm not part of all this good for you i guess i kind of am
hey i fucking love this guy okay rachel maddow's involved somebody ought to cut her balls off
it's part of the memes part of an anti-Trump
narrative launched by the Atlantic
a left-wing magazine which
used four anonymous sources
anonymous I say again
anonymous sources
I could do that you could do that
hey you know what I heard Biden fucks kids who'd you hear from
none of your business
anonymous sources
people who are familiar with the matter
you know babysitters
but that magazine that article
they claim that President Trump had a disparage
living and dead members of the US military
calling them suckers and
losers. No! No, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no!
Exactly right. Henlein, who is a
Trump supporter, according to his Facebook post, said
he does not believe the president would say those things about him.
The origin of the
meme is not clear, but the name of a woman
in Rachel Maddow is included
in the image.
They will
do nothing. It's their religion,
folks. I'll say it again. Just remember that.
This comes before their family,
before their friends.
It's all they have
in life. Most of them are misfits.
And this guy,
look at him. He's scarred for life.
But let's use him. Let's exploit this guy, look at him, he's scarred for life, but let's use him. Let's exploit this guy.
God bless that patriot. Hey, ladies and gentlemen, this episode is sponsored by our friends at
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normal bowel flow and is a weight loss remedy. Tommy took, he dropped like 10 pounds in like
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Old people get constipated a lot like myself.
If I have a piece of Italian bread, I am blocked for a week.
I don't know why. Speaking of old people, this story really frosted my nipples.
I'm going to tell you a story about this, and Chris Rock will back me up, hopefully, if you don't hate me.
The Golden Girls.
The Golden Girls.
Classic sitcom.
You know it's coming, don't you, white people?
To be remade with an all-black cast.
We have some song from the show.
What folks says about this family, I does.
I has told you and told you that you can always tell a lady,
but the way that she eat in front of folks like a bird.
And I ain't aiming for you to go to Mr. John Wilkinson
and eat like a field hand and gobble like a hog.
That was Bea Arthur's character.
Beloved sitcom girl set to be revived with an all-black cast with Regina King.
Am I supposed to know these words?
Tracy Ellis Ross.
Raz, you're black.
Do you know any of these people?
Yeah.
God damn it, get out of the room.
Replacing Betty White and Bea Arthur in their iconic roles.
Can we leave anything alone?
Son of a the iconic sitcom
which ran for seven seasons between 85 and 92 revolved around the lives of four white women
living together in miami so obviously it's racist but the new project will seek to reimagine the
situation from a black perspective that means there'll be guns and drugs i uh
There'll be guns and drugs.
Here's why this upset me so much, and this is a true story.
I went to Chris Rock when I was working for him, and it was 99-2000, around then.
And I said, I went right into the office.
I go, Chris, I got an idea.
I think Ali was there, his producer, too.
I said, let's do a black version of the Golden Girls.
All the black women are funny as hell.
Sassy, don't like whitey.
That's a hit.
Chris said, nah, he thought, he said,
I don't think there's a big enough audience for it.
Which I said, do you realize how popular your people are right now?
And especially now.
But I did.
I asked him, and him and Ali said,
I don't think the audience is big enough.
I thought I had a winner there.
But don't get too excited,
because this isn't going to be a series.
It's going to be like a streaming one-off thing.
It says, fans should not get excited about the beloved program returning to the airwaves.
However, as the revival appears to be a one-night special set to broadcast over Zoom.
How does that work?
So what are they doing it to their families?
How do you, I don't understand the world today, folks.
Ross 47 announced news of the revival in an Instagram
post over the weekend, revealing that she
will be reinterpreting Betty
White's character, Rose Nyland.
Good luck being funnier than her.
King will take the role of Dorothy Zbornak,
made famous by that
giant man, Bea Arthur.
Do you know she played for the
Giants in the early 60s?
She had 11 sacks one year.
Meanwhile, Nip and Tuck star Sanaa Lathan
will play the character of Blanche Devereaux,
who was a big whore,
and in 12 Years a Slave,
Alfred Woodard is set to appear as Sophia Petrillo.
12 Years a slave.
I'm black, y'all, and I'm black, y'all, and I'm blacker than black, and I'm black, y'all.
Hello?
Lady?
Suck a cock.
The special, did you guys do what I told you to do yesterday?
Did you Google Otto and George?
Please do.
yesterday? Did you Google Otto and George? Please do. The special will be streamed live,
and it is a partnership between Zoom and Color of Change, the nation's largest online racial justice organization. Rez, I mean, the Color of Change. Is the internet racist too? I mean, how much more of this shit can we take?
I can't take it no more.
I can't take it no more.
I was talking to my black girlfriend.
She said this.
What folks says about this family, I does.
I has told you and told you
that you can always tell a lady
but the way that she eat in front of folks like a bird.
That is from Gone with the Wind,
a movie that they're taking off like AMC and shit.
You know why?
Because it accurately portrayed how America was.
It would be a great reminder how we can improve ourselves,
but let's get rid of that.
Anyways, it's unclear whether the women will be doing a table read that repurposes an original episode or whether an entirely new script has been devised.
Ross's Instagram post was inundated with comments from excited fans who appear unable to wait for the live event.
However, there were numerous people who were offended by the idea
of the actresses messing
with the classic show. Now, Rez,
you told me a couple days
ago that black people like the
right? Golden Girls?
Which surprised the hell out of me.
But it's a really funny, well
written show.
My sister's kids,
they're like in their teens.
Some younger, love the Golden Girls.
So seriously,
why do you have to fuck with it?
Well, there's eight black people
who would like to see the black old ladies.
I'm actually for the idea
because I came up with it originally.
Did I not mention it to you, Raz,
about a week ago on the show?
Not even?
I'm telling you.
I'm telling you.
Adam Carolla stole my fucking title, emotional support,
which Tommy came up with.
I still like Adam.
And I'm not even saying he took it.
I guarantee one of his fans said, hey, I got a great title.
That's what your fans do.
My fans have done it on my behalf.
You know, they get an idea from somebody and they try to take credit for it.
But that was too coincidental.
I mentioned the title in like a week or two later.
Anyways, I still like Carol.
Good guy.
Somebody said they wrote in, please.
No, I mean, no disrespect.
But the Golden Girls is a classic. It should stay that way. somebody said they wrote in, please no, I mean no disrespect,
but the Golden Girls is a classic.
It should stay that way.
One black follower, this surprised me,
said they didn't see the point in changing the race of the original characters.
She said, as much as I would love to see
y'all make magic together,
it would be nice to see an original piece of work
and leave this classic alone.
I would never want to see, this is what we need more of.
It's just, she said, this is a black one.
I would never want to see white counterparts redo your original work or anyone for that matter.
Which is why I just have to, I had to shelve.
I was going to do Roots with an all-white cast.
I had to put that aside.
I had a couple of kids from Eight is Enough.
I had one of the Osmonds playing Kunta Kinte.
I had Edgar Winter as a slave
but I love it
a black woman being very honest
I love you all too much not to support
but I'm just saying
see that
you know me and my buddy went out
he's looking at a house in Georgia
drove about an hour and a half from here
and there was an old black guy had to be 80 it's about 100 out there You know, me and my buddy went out. He's looking at a house in Georgia. Went out, drove about an hour and a half from here.
And there was an old black guy, had to be 80.
It's about 100 out there.
He's in flannel and long pants and he's weed whacking.
You know, it's got to be 100.
He's got to be 80.
I'm not shitting you.
He sees us, comes over, we start chatting.
You know what I mean?
And my buddy looks at me and goes, yeah, we hate each other, don't we? You know what I mean?
It really is. It fucking, after
moving to Savannah, it's even more obvious
how they're dividing us.
And it
fries my fucking...
Anyways, I didn't get to this story
yesterday.
I don't know how to
segue from black golden girls.
Chase, did you put that picture up?
That you worked on?
You didn't?
How the fuck?
You contributed something very beautiful.
Ay yi yi.
This is the one.
Hey, wasn't there a version?
There was an episode where they got mud mass. Right, Rez? this is the one, hey, wasn't there a version?
There was an episode where they got mud mass.
Right, Rez?
Holy shit, I was giving credit to Jason.
He saw the episode.
Look at this.
This looks like the founding fathers mocking black people.
Look at Bea Arthur.
She looks like a fucking,
a power forward for the Celtics in the 60s.
Speaking of sports, ladies and gentlemen, I'm not a big tennis fan.
I can watch it, and I appreciate it.
I like when the girls play and they grunt as they hit the ball.
I pretend they're fucking me.
Anyway, Novak Djokovic was defaulted in the fourth round.
This is a few days old, so pardon me if you heard it.
But again, I'm talking about because political correctness has run amok,
and this really proves it.
Novak Djokovic was defaulted in the fourth round of the 2020 U.S. Open Sunday
after hitting a ball in frustration that struck a line judge on the court
at Arthur Ashe Stadium.
That line judge was hit in the throat and had to be helped off the court.
Why? Because she was a girl, maybe.
Looked like a lesbian to me.
Well, Nick, why does that matter?
Because if she didn't have an Adam's apple, there'd be no issue.
Who's with me?
That's a great point.
How is this show not on fucking fox nation that line just was hitting the throat had to be helped off the court after appearing to have trouble
breathing you dyke oh boy you jokovic a 17 time grand slam champion what does that mean jace grand slam is that like saying uh mlb or i think
it means he's won uh at least one of the major tour yeah there you go you know 17 times jesus
and top seed in this year's u.s open was disqualified from the tournament um we have
some video i let me tell you something we used to play hockey with a tennis ball, okay?
My friend Mike Palmer, who was a captain of the Dartmouth Hobbs,
he had a slap shot that you wouldn't fucking believe. He hit me dead in the throat, and I have it in Adam's apple,
and I believe this broad does too.
But, I mean, I'm talking he had a rocket and fucking, you know,
I spit up blood for a second.
I went back to play net.
Now this girl who has testicles, watch how she reacts.
A discarded ball belted behind the baseline.
Oh, yeah, that's belted.
It was as if Novak Djokovic could see the U.S. Open being wrenched from his grasp.
It struck a line official right in her throat.
That's it.
And as she writhed in pain.
Ah!
Ah! And you want to be in the military.
It's a tennis ball.
Oh, my God.
And he didn't drill it.
He fucking wristed it.
Hits her in her big giant Adam's apple.
Could have hit her in her balls. Could have been worse.
Now he's checking on her like he cares. Good.
The world number one went to her right. Obviously he's concerned, but there's a sanction for hitting a boy. A, she was a whore.
B, she was a whore.
Your tears are so yummy and sweet.
Oh, the tears of unfathomable sadness.
Yummy, yummy, you guys.
Seriously, and I'm not kidding you folks.
It was an issue because she looks like a gay woman.
But if it was a ball boy, do you really think they would have thrown him out of the tournament and shit?
You know, they fucking said, we need you. you you're gonna play in front of no people and do you believe where we are nick yet no i'm telling you that's what the issue was
if that was a ball a line judge who was a male nobody would have blinked. Anyways, of course he had to do some horrible
apology that made
me sick to my stomach.
It was the second time he hit a ball in frustration
after pointing the first set of his match
against Pablo Carreño Busta.
And this one came after Busta
broke his serve.
Ever break your serve? That fucking hurts, man.
The ball comes through the skin.
This is what Djokovic had to say.
Had to be emasculated.
No, no, no, no, no, Jace.
Hold on, Jake.
This whole situation has left me really sad and empty.
I checked on the line person, and the tournament told me that,
thank God she's feeling okay.
You hit her with a tennis ball, not a fucking poison dart.
Jesus Christ.
I'm extremely sorry to have caused her such stress.
So unintended, so wrong.
I'm not disclosing her name to respect her privacy,
but it rhymes with front chapper.
As for the disqualification, I need to go back and listen to this.
Listen to this.
Go back within and work on my disappointment and turn this all into a lesson for my growth
and evolution as a player and human being.
Let me translate that for you.
I have to cut my own balls off and join this feminized society.
I apologize to the U own balls off and join this feminized society. I apologize
to the U.S. Open tournament,
everyone associated for
my behavior. I'm very grateful
to my team and family
for being my rock support.
You would have thought he punched this
girl in the throat.
And my fans for always being there
with me. Thank you, and I
am so sorry.
And to that,
I say,
Oh my God.
Oh my God.
Let me handle it.
If I did that.
Yeah.
I hit the bitch by accident.
It was a tennis ball.
It wasn't a rock.
And you're kicking me out of the tournament because you know I was going to win it.
Fuck you.
People would love me for that.
According to tennis writer Ben Rothenberg,
Djokovic tried to downplay the incident on the court,
reportedly saying she doesn't have to go to the hospital for this before he eventually left the USTA Billie Jean King National Tennis Center.
Oh, my God.
That's why it was a big deal.
He hit a lesbian in a stadium named after a lesbian.
Everybody in the story eats pussy, but Djokovic.
Listen, it's the best show ever.
I can't believe we're not more famous. Here's Djokovic. Listen. It's the best show ever. I can't believe we're not more famous.
Here's Djokovic apologizing.
No, I'm sorry.
Here's the reporters
trying to bust his balls
and emasculate him further.
And even he's had
a little bit of enough.
Go ahead.
When you threw the racket,
does it concern you
that one day
that could cost you dearly?
I mean, if the ball
would have hit someone today,
is that something
you think you ought to address?
You guys are unbelievable.
Why is it unbelievable?
Yeah, because you're always picking this kind of things.
It's incredible.
I keep doing these things.
Why don't I get suspended then?
I'm saying you're close, aren't you?
I'm close.
I'm still not suspended, so if I'm not close, I'm not close.
If that ball had hit a spectator, it could have been serious. It could not close I'm not close it could have been
it could have been
sure
or it could have snow
it could have been snow
in O2 Arena today
but it didn't
so you don't think
you're concerned about
your mindset
so I'm the only player
that shows his frustration
on the court right
that's what you want to say
I love this guy
what is
can you imagine being a guy and asking these questions?
We are so...
The planet is in deep shit.
Don't you feel bad?
I mean, you hit a woman.
Eh, and you...
By the way, has he got the skinniest head you've ever seen?
Jesus Christ, there's not an ounce of fat on him.
Go ahead.
I'm the only player that is showing that.
Sorry?
So?
So, you are showing this frustration.
I'm asking you.
Do you think it's an issue for you?
It is not an issue for me.
It's not the first time that I did it.
Don't say a fucking word to me.
I'll get up and I'll bury this telephone in your head.
My God.
Leave the guy
be. Holy moly.
Wash your filthy asses,
America. That's right.
You've heard me say that on this show a hundred times.
And now you can wear it for display
probably thanks to our friends at
thedonaldstuff.com. They have a full
collection of wash your
filthy asses items featuring yours.
Truly check these out. They've got the T-shirt.
The coffee mug. The towel, the coffee mug.
The towel.
The coffee mug.
The poster.
Even the bear koozie.
It says here, Raz, rotate through the five items.
So Jason just ignored it because it was written to Raz.
Make sure that when you purchase, you use the promo code Nick and get 10% off everything at thedonaldstuff.com.
We thank them for sponsoring the show.
And I want to thank other people who have contributed to the show since yesterday.
Financially, you do realize you keep us up and running.
One-time contributions at nickdip.com.
Bob, Andrew, Ohio.
Louis Jones, Illinois. Greg, Bob, Andrew, Ohio, Louis Jones, Illinois, Greg Perotka, Arizona,
Matthew Marangoni, Canada,
Jacob Finnegan, Colorado,
Harold Nordsguff, Alaska,
Slicer Titsoff, Florida.
That's his legal name.
Travis Skarpnis, Texas, Jeff Tipton, Virginia, Kenneth Forrest, Connecticut, that's his legal name travis scarpness texas jeff tipton virginia kenneth forest connecticut kenneth rogers of virginia nick please convince raz to stay a gay guy from pennsylvania black
uh aloysius mcbride washington james aaron kentucky don juan kim James Aaron, Kentucky. Don Juan Kim.
Canada.
Randy Parks, Washington.
And new monthly supporters at Patreon.
Ira Simmons, Kyle Hund, and Extra Cheese.
Thank you guys so much.
You keep us up and running.
And we appreciate that very much.
I'll do one more story since you guys are so generous.
We do have a Patreon question.
Oh, good.
What's it?
Fucking three hours into the show?
Go ahead.
Joey Indahl from Anchorage, Alaska.
Nick, if the NBA hates white people so much, why do a majority of the players have white wives?
Honestly curious.
Well, that's very, very easy to answer.
It's the difference between hating white people and white pussy.
Everybody knows that white pussy is the pussy on the planet.
I don't even fuck girls with tans when I was in high school.
Not because I'm racist.
My sisters were Italian looking.
I always liked the paler. I've actually gone to funerals and looked in the casket. I always liked the paler.
I've actually gone to funerals and looked in the casket.
I'd give that a shot.
I like pale.
Raz, why is that?
I have to stand up for black women here.
Black sex is better.
White porn is better.
White porn?
Yeah.
Wait a minute.
You got a white wife.
Black sex is better. Black sex is better.
Okay.
I got to believe that.
Watching interracial porn because you guys are hung like Grecian bowls.
I mean.
I banged a black chick when I first moved to New York.
She was a prostitute.
She looked like a young Whitney Houston.
Stunning.
$50.
I got the whole salad bar.
And this is how it ended.
She left in the morning with her headphones on crying.
I made a prostitute cry.
And it's so funny.
This is a true story.
This is how I did it.
I went into the apartment.
My manager,
Barry Katz is there and a comedian named Ed Regine and his late fucking
70s.
They're haggling over money and she's sitting there.
I climb up the upper bunk.
I go,
get up here.
Bing,
bang,
bang.
One more story. Raz, thank you for the input. I don't know this off my chest. We reported on a show.
Remember a couple weeks ago, three weeks ago, Tom Brenneman is the play-by-play guy for the Cincinnati Reds.
And he made a gay slur when he thought the mic was off.
And it was one of the funniest things I have ever heard.
Tom Brenneman may very well have destroyed his career last month when he uttered a gay slur on air.
And there are many who would be just fine with never hearing from the Cincinnati Reds
broadcaster again.
Yeah, we call those intolerant fuckstains.
Believe me, I know there are a lot of people who are still very angry.
And I understand that Brenneman told the Post on Monday in his first interview since
the incident.
Nowadays, the 56 year old is in the middle of an apology tour that has drawn skepticism
about its sincerity.
See, the white straight man can't win. Now he's apologizing, which he fucking shouldn't.
And that's they're saying it's not sincere. So you're damned if you do. You're damned if you
don't. So don't. One stop was to have lunch with Evan Millward, a gay newscaster in the Cincinnati area, he said this.
I suck cock and I love it. Yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy.
Don't be a pawn, Millward said he told himself before meeting with Brenneman a little more than two weeks ago.
And the gay guy said it was pretty clear to me early on that he was not using me.
that he was not using me.
Millwood 31 and Ryan Messer,
a 47-year-old leading LGBTQ goo gobbler activist
in Cincinnati,
are treating Brenneman
as a reclamation project,
hoping the man who has called
Reds games since 2007
eventually will be able to serve
as an ally to the LGBTQ community
by teaching others how hateful the word is i am so
let's take a look at the original uh slur that got him in trouble and boy did this make me
fucking laugh.
One of the fag capitals of the world.
Red's live.
He goes right back to the promo.
Red's live.
Brought to you by Turtle Wax.
Oh, my God.
He was talking about them going on a road trip, I think, to San Francisco.
It's the fag capital.
Why can't we all laugh at that?
So what you're telling me, LGBTQ, that because some guy said that,
somewhere a gay guy is going to get beat up.
We all have words that bother us.
I was called a wop and a guinea, even the N-word, because I was so dark as a kid.
Get the fuck over yourselves, faggots.
Jesus Christ.
Honestly.
Words hurt.
That's why they call you faggots.
Fucking words hurt.
What are you, made? Fucking balsa wood.
So these guys are for the Reds reinstating Brenneman from suspension. They said to gay
people, it's a charged word. That word is part of a toolkit of weapons that people used to make.
You got a toolkit with weapons in it. Keep it under your bed, you fucking jerk-offs.
Used to make someone feel less than themselves.
It's only, how do you feel less than yourselves?
Really?
So some person, ignorant person that calls you a fag,
you let that get to you?
It's only used to degrade someone.
Of course, you should know it's wrong,
but you can't assume they understand everything else
packed into that word.
Please give me a call.
Anyways, he says, I've never used that word before in my life.
Brenneman said he's lying.
He said that better than anybody I've ever heard.
The fag capital of the world.
Dude, come on, Tom.
But my point is you shouldn't be, you know, I mean, what happened to forgive and forget?
What up?
Anyways, let's take a look at him apologizing.
That'll be the end of the show. I made a comment earlier tonight that I guess went out over the air that I am deeply ashamed of.
If I have hurt anyone out there, I can't tell you how much I say from the bottom of my heart.
I'm so very, very sorry.
I pride myself and think of myself as a man of faith.
As there's a drive in a deep left field by Castellanos,
it will be a home run.
Pause.
Right in the middle of the apology.
I'm so sad.
If I hurt anybody out there, that's not who I am.
There's a drive.
It's about 490 feet.
Might break Mickey Mantle's record for a home run.
Anyways, Fags, I'm sorry.
Go ahead.
And so that'll make it a 4-0 ball game.
You're a crumb creep.
I don't know if I'm going to be putting on this headset again.
I don't know if it's going to be for the Reds.
I don't know if it's going to be for my bosses at Fox.
I want to apologize for the people who signed my paycheck, for the Reds,
for Fox Sports Ohio, for the people who signed my paycheck, for the Reds, for Fox Sports Ohio,
for the people I work with, for anybody that I've offended here tonight.
I can't begin to tell you how deeply sorry I am.
That is not who I am and never has been.
And I'd like to think maybe I could have some people that could back that up.
I am very, very sorry.
And I beg you to take it the rest of the way.
All right.
That's enough.
Oh, God.
Everything I reported on today was about emasculation, basically.
Making Djokovic apologize and bend. It's just...
Anyways.
That's the show, ladies and gentlemen.
Raz, thank you so much
for what you've done for the show, brother.
I'm serious. We're going to try to keep him
in some capacity while he's
in North Carolina. I don't know
what we'll have him do. I don't know.
Maybe black sex is better. You can send us some
footage.
I don't know. Maybe black sex is better. You can send us some footage. I don't know.
Jason, good job. Hey, that
is it for the day, ladies and gentlemen. You guys
think it, I will say it. You're very welcome.
We'll see you back here tomorrow. Have a good
day.
Oh! Woo! guitar solo We'll see you next time.