The Nick DiPaolo Show - EnviroMENTALists Cheer on Covid | Nick Di Paolo Show #339
Episode Date: April 23, 2020Pocahontas' brother passes. Trump admonishes Kemp. Tom Hanks sends typewriter to little Corona. Thank you Matt M. from Lowell, MA for your "Ask Nick!" question and for your continued support on Patreo...n! FREE! MONDAY - THURSDAY 5PM EST #Trump #MAGA #ABreathOfFreshAir
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Hello, I'm Mike Lindell.
My pillow, you just look at it, you pass out.
It's a fucking magic pillow.
Invented by a guy who was on crack.
Pretty ironic.
We never sleep.
Anyways, guys,
just want to say that this is the show right now.
People are starving for it, obviously.
The thing's growing like we hoped it would.
And you know why that is?
Nowhere else can you hear the truth.
I deliver the news.
That stuff's right out of the papers, right off the websites.
But we make it funny and entertaining.
We know you guys are locked in your house, and you need some relief.
And people, Trump's approval ratings are up, even during this pandemic.
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So it's a great way to get your message out as far as your product to people who think like you, that are for free speech and for the American way.
We all want to get back to work.
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I'm climbing the walls.
But you guys make
this possible. So we thank you for that. That's about it. So what I want you to do right now
is to enjoy the show. So, enjoy. guitar solo Yeah, yeah, oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Good afternoon, good evening, good morning, whatever you watch this.
How are you folks? Welcome, it's Thursday, last day of the week here.
I can't believe time is whipping by.
Are you corona free?
Are you social distancing and listening to all the horseshit and all the power hungry
people telling you what to do?
Trump had a reversal on our governor
Governor Kemp here in Georgia
Who apparently has a set of balls on him
He's like fuck that I'm not going to watch my state go bankrupt
Get to the gym sweat on each other
I don't give a shit
Oh no I'm running out
Is it good to do this and cigarettes
I heard it could help you catch corona
Good to be with you people.
I'll tell you.
Run through a motherfucker face.
The Antichrist.
You got me in a vendetta kind of mood.
Hey, Chris Cuomo, we can't get this guy out of the news, huh?
Jesus Christ.
He's, I don't know who's on TV more, him or the MyPillow guy.
It's about neck and neck.
This fucking guy just loves himself anyways uh guess what chris cuomo's 14 year old son mario has contracted the coronavirus following the infections of his father and his mother Chris Cuomo announced his own positive test for COVID-19 about three weeks ago,
and he revealed his wife's diagnosis two weeks later.
Christina in turn post about Mario's illness on Instagram Wednesday.
She said,
This virus has created a different version of me.
My hope is to be stronger, healthier, get a husband who's not an asshole,
smarter about the virus at large.
After 10 days of ups and downs, feeling good one day, terrible the next,
I'm now working hard to get my son Mario through the virus.
And I guess quarantine didn't
help. Was he with them when he went to the Hamptons? Remember getting a fight with a
fat biker guy? I wonder if the kid was there. Anyways, Chris Cuomo said he ended his quarantine
on Monday night, posting this Instagram video that we showed when he emerged from his basement like Jesus H. Christ uh where he was isolated but now the kids got it and uh
you don't want to really see that you know I mean your tears are so yummy and sweet oh the tears
of unfathomable but like I said over Easter weekend Cuomo was was visiting a property he was developing in East Hampton
when he got into an argument with a 65-year-old guy riding a bike.
And I saw some footage of Chris Cuomo.
I think Tucker Carlson, he's in his office with a 100-pound dumbbell going, yeah!
He gives Italians a bad name.
Oh, God.
Pretty strong dude, though.
I've seen him work out.
Cuomo's son is Mario,
named after his grampy.
Yeah.
Mario Cuomo, the late Mario Cuomo,
who was a, you know,
he was the fucking governor of New York,
wasn't he?
From 1983 to 1994, he was pretty popular.
Kind of liberal, but very eloquent, you know, very well-spoken,
unlike his meathead son.
He's like dice.
My son's got the virus.
He's thinking we'll suck his dick.
I think he was sucking dick. Ha, ha, ha, ha.
Ha, ha, ha, ha.
Ha, ha, ha, ha.
Ha, ha, ha, ha.
It seems to be going after famous people lately.
Who else?
How about Elizabeth Warren's oldest brother?
I thought he was going to be like in his 60s and shit.
The guy's 80-something years old,
but she just announced that he died of coronavirus. brother i thought he was gonna be like in his 60s and shit guy's 80 something years old but uh
she just announced that uh he died of coronavirus so His name was Don Reed Herring.
Died from the Chinese, oh, it says Chinese coronavirus.
I must have got this off Breitbart.
At the age of 86, she said,
my oldest brother Don Reed died from coronavirus on Tuesday evening.
She tweeted, sharing a Boston Globe article about a brother's death.
He joined the Air Force at 19, spent his career in the military,
including five and a half years off and on in combat in Vietnam. God bless his soul.
How did you end up with the politics you did, Elizabeth? Your brother seemed to have his shit
straight. I'm grateful to the nurses and frontline staff who took care of him, but it's hard to know
that there was no family to hold his hand and to say I love you one more time and no funeral for those of us
who loved him to hold each other close.
I'll miss you dearly, my brother,
the senator said,
and seemed like a good guy.
She doesn't change fast.
Your tears are so yummy, sweet.
She's a real douche,
but anyways,
Warren, who ended her campaign for the White House
when she realized nobody fucking likes her.
Here's a picture of her when she was young
with Dennis Eckersley, apparently, of the Red Sox.
Which one's the guy that died?
Should have been the guy with the shirt.
That's how I dressed when I did nightclubs in the 80s.
Got me a lot of ass.
Some of it was female.
Good night, everybody.
According to the Globe, Herring was diagnosed with cancer several years ago, was hospitalized for pneumonia in February.
Herring was recently moved into a rehabilitation facility where another patient had been infected with coronavirus.
And he later tested positive for the illness in early April.
Warren's brother was transferred to intensive care on April 15th, where he died nearly a week later. Warren, who ended her campaign in the White House in March,
criticized President Trump's response to the coronavirus on Tuesday, calling for an investigation
into his administration's efforts to combat the virus. Well, I don't want to break up
the meeting or nothing, but she's something
of a cunt, ain't she, Doc?
How do you mean that?
She likes
a rigged game, you know what I mean?
This
kind of looks like you, Andy, Tommy, and Rich
when you started the podcast.
Oh, Braz.
My wife's way better than that titler's one
yeah that's ryan and jason
ah that guy looks like eckersley he's he's probably the handsome guy right i don't know
anyways uh god bless him. Vietnam vet.
Good man.
Fucking Elizabeth.
Boy, did she ruin the family.
She said he was very charming.
Boy, too bad you didn't get any of that, huh?
Just adult.
Operation COVID crackdown.
Bus predators targeting kids at home from school.
See, the kids are all at home now online, either taking classes or just chatting with each other.
So the pervs, the kid fuckers, are naturally trying to exploit the situation.
Never let a crisis, you know, never not take advantage of a crisis.
I'm paraphrasing Rahm Emanuel.
Anyways, 30 perverts targeting the surge of kids online because the school shutdowns were
busted in Virginia in a sting operation.
Can you imagine that?
Hey, little boy, do you want some candy?
Hey, little boy, do you want some candy?
The investigation led to the arrest of suspects ranging in age from 20 to 74 and a combined 68 felony charges, including solicitation of a minor and attempted indecent liberties.
Fairfax Police said, look at these, look at, look at these poor, let's take a look at them.
Let's go to the top row, three in from the left.
The fuck is this guy?
That's Fernando Valenzuela.
He was a pitcher in the 80s for the Dodgers.
And then you got to the far right in the top row.
Look at that poor prick.
He's right out of the show Ozark that I've been watching.
And then my favorite one is down last row at the bottom, far left. He looks just like,
make me a sandwich. Make me a fucking sandwich. What is the matter with these scumbags trying
to fuck kids online? You can act like a man. What's the matter with you? The suspects,
primarily from Virginia, though some lived in Maryland and D.C.,
allegedly used online platforms to strike up explicit conversations
that eventually led to solicitation of sex from investigators posing as children.
Detectives then took the men into custody when they arrived at an agreed-upon location.
School closures across the country
and a sharp uptick in students
using online instruction
have inadvertently placed them
at a higher risk of exploitation.
What a sick world.
What the hell's going on out here?
Christ's sake.
You got apps where you can have broads delivered to you,
but you still want the fucking,
you creepy motherfuckers.
The guy in the far right bottom row, far right corner,
put on a nice blue t-shirt so he'd stick out.
Look at that.
How about the guy above him?
Fucking Nick Nolte's trying to pick up Cub Scouts.
How you doing, Timmy?
DLI candied apples.
Get in the truck.
What a greasy.
Yay for diversity.
Look at all those kid fuckers.
Anyways, they should be taken out and shot.
They always re-offend.
Just rehabilitate them.
Cut off their cocks.
Feed it to them.
Who's the old black guy, the third row down?
Second from the left.
Jesus Christ.
OJJ. Anderson.
Oh, what slimy motherfuckers.
Anyways, get them off.
They're making me want to shit blood.
You know, I'm getting sick of celebrities who are applauding the whole COVID thing.
You know why they're applauding it?
Because they're all, you you know new green deal people who
believe the planet's going to end in five minutes and uh well they're happy right now that no cars
are on the road you know i mean this is what they wanted they wanted to shut down countries like
ours so we can save the planet sick fucks our little friend seen here greta Thunberg. I hear that music every time I see that little creep.
Her and, you know, sane people like Joaquin Phoenix and fellow eco luminaries used Earth Day Wednesday to rejoice in the global economic shutdown that has led to a reduction in carbon.
They'd rather see countries tank.
They're so ignorant, the poor bastards, and see the world tank.
People could jump off buildings because they've lost their jobs.
They'd rather the pandemic has been a dream come true for climate alarmists.
If you ignore all the misery, they wanted us to switch off our economies to prevent a supposed climate apocalypse in 10 years. And hey, presto, the wish
was granted by the virus. Thunberg, 17-year-old Swedish climate evangelist, did caution her fellow
warriors not to be too optimistic about the pause in carbon pollution
because the so-called climate crisis is not slowing down. So this isn't enough. The whole
world is shut down. It's not enough for her. I wish she'd get online. One of those guys we just
showed in the previous story, pick her up. Let me buy you some ice cream, you little whore.
But other activists seize a pandemic opportunity to push their agendas as Democrats tried to shoehorn the Green New Deal into economic relief bills.
As you remember, some of these bills that are providing relief for businesses and, you know, loan small business.
It was held up because, you know, Nancy Pelosi and Chuck Schumer wanted to stick shit in about the neither Greenpeace nor Greta Thunberg,
Schumer wanted to stick shit in about the neither Greenpeace nor Greta Thunberg
nor any other individual
on collective organization
or collective owners have achieved
so much in favor of the health of the planet
in such a short time. Who said that?
Spanish scientist MartÃn López
Corredoria
Corredoria. I don't know
how to say him. Who gives a fuck? But
she says a miracle happened. It's
certainly not very good for the economy in
general, but it's fantastic
for the environment. Make me
a sandwich. Make me a fucking
sandwich. Maria.
But that
is the price climate alarmists have been
demanding to slash emissions by
crippling our economies in an uncertain
bid to dial down the
earth's temperature now we see what that means you're getting a look at if they could have it
their way this is how we'd live all the time economies be damned you know they're just
fucking nobody's more psycho than people who in you know green people fucking
one thing the pandemic has shown us in real time, this is a good article, I think
Miranda Devine, here's the name, is how inaccurate computer models are and their sensitivity to
variations in inputs. Whether it's a coronavirus or global one, these models are chronically
unreliable at predicting the future. We have seen that projections of as many as two million
American deaths from the coronavirus were wrong
by orders of magnitude, which they were. It's only as good as the information you put into these
models is what you get out. By Wednesday, with the rate of infection plateauing, America had
suffered about 47,000 deaths, while projections have been revised to around 60,000. So you can
see computer modeling is an imperfect science. But none of this is to
criticize the models used to manage the pandemic because they are built to change as inputs change.
In other words, the data you put in changes from day to day. So you're going to get different
results. But they have been off by a mile on a lot of these things, like the L.A. County model,
which I think I have a story today. I mentioned it yesterday.
They had, in early April, they had 8,000 people infected. Now they have these antibody tests.
Turns out two to 300,000 people in LA County were infected at that point. And their number that they
put out in public was 8,000. So the mortality rate, which they thought was around 4%, it seemed
really lethal, was really 0.1 to 0.2%.
And I got to believe that guys like Governor Kemp and other governors who are itchy to open, you know, they get a hold of it.
They read this shit and they, you know.
So anyways, what else did they say? She said when when Quiz and Fox News two weeks ago about the reliability of the seesaw and coronavirus models, Fauci said they're only as good as the assumptions that you put into the models. Doomsday models predicting imminent climate calamity from the United Nations inter more bullshit. Just remember that. Should not be used to remake our economies on blind faith or to terrify susceptible children like Greta Thunberg.
Oh, does Brods Letner have it?
Computer models are not holy writ.
They're just useful tools.
You know, like fucking Rachel Maddow.
Useful tools.
Computer models and ugly demonization games being played
over the coronavirus listen to this you want to hear some left-wing propaganda vice news has
betrayed protests against the lockdown as the dastardly work of white supremacist neo-nazis
citing alarmist research by an outfit called site intelligence get this one
this is my and fog fox anchor Sean Hannity has been branded a killer by Vox News for you idiots
who read Vox News for his coverage of the coronavirus citing a dubious study from the
University of Chicago in quotes why the finding uh that Sean Hannity killed people is disturbingly
plausible.
That's what they put on fucking Vox.
Oh, do you understand?
We're in the middle of a pandemic, right?
The shit's dangerous, not as dangerous as this saying, right?
The shit's dangerous, not as dangerous as this saying, right?
And that's not enough to bridge the political divide in our country.
Even as a pandemic's ripping through it, people are pointing fingers. If you believe that some states should reopen because you're a psycho, you're anti-science, you're a fucking...
They can politicize anything.
I can't wait.
Tomorrow here in Georgia,
I'm going to go to a nail salon.
I've never been to one,
just to get my toes done,
to prove.
When the lady's doing my nails,
I'm going to go,
what's the latest on Kim Jong-un?
You're from there, right?
You could shut your eyes and throw a dart if it hits a nail salon.
It's Koreans.
Good ones.
Hard-working ones.
Anyways, so you eco-friendly cuckoos.
Al Gore's probably, you know, leading the charge.
Shut your holes.
Speaking of famous people, I have a Patreon question.
Already, Roz?
Already.
Oh, for the love of Christ,
go ahead. Matt M.
Low Mass, up by my neck of the woods. Favorite comedian?
Thank you. I'm your favorite comedian? All right.
Oh, question. Favorite comedian?
I would
go with Norma McDonald.
And
Carla Quinn, who I, you you know every night we work together comedy
cell is as good as they get there's a lot but norm mcdonald cracks me up with his baby face but his
dark sense of humor and he's politically he seems pretty sharp and robert klein i can't nobody
really mentions robert klein that guy makes me belly laugh.
Even when he passed his peak, he's put out a few specials the last few years.
I slip into his delivery on stage sometimes.
Robert Klein.
I used to see him on Letterman.
He was real hip.
He had the first HBO special ever, comedy.
He was the guy.
Even like Seinfeld, Robert Klein was he was the guy even like seinfeld was guys fucking robert klein was like the hip guy
and uh i remember seeing him on letterman going talking about george washington he was uh you know
the founder of the country one of the greatest minds to ever enter politics in this country a
real leader and and how do we celebrate his birthday with a mattress sale and you know that
type of he just has this delivery kind of an old vaudeville. He punches it.
But I just love his shit.
Google Robert Klein on The Tonight Show.
We show clips on this show, I think, of him.
There's a lot of them.
I heard George Carlin on the way in here.
He has to be the most prolific.
You can hear that guy 20 times in a week on the radio, and it's 20 different bits.
He had something to say about everything
and it was always funny.
Louis C.K. might be
the best, I think.
Honestly working today.
Louis is,
I don't give a fuck what you think about him.
Just his premises are so original
and funny. Then you got Dave
Attell and Doug Stanhope.
Fucking makes me laugh.
He's out of his mind.
I even like comedians that I don't respect, like their acts, some of them.
It's something I like.
I don't know.
It's a fraternity.
But Norm Macdonald makes me belly laugh.
So I hope that answered your question.
More COVID.
Jesus Christ, am I sick of this shit?
By the way, I had the chills last night.
Not when my teeth were rattling, but almost similar to... Now I'm sitting here going, did I have it a couple months ago?
And is it coming back now? Nobody fucking knows.
Now cats are spitting in your face and...
It's causing blood clots. They know nothing about this shit.
Anyways, how about, yeah, for an example,
the new coronavirus appears to be causing sudden strokes.
Wasn't that a show, a sitcom in the 80s, Sudden Stroke?
Oh, different.
Sudden Strokes.
Be a great sitcom.
When you do a guy's stroke you gotta curl your fingers sudden strokes that'll be a funniest sitcom bunch of young kids who had strokes
living together in a house uh anyways yeah it's sudden strokes and adults in their 30s and 40s
who are not otherwise terribly ill.
That's kind of creepy.
I think your brain is going soft.
They said patients may be unwilling to call 911 because they have heard hospitals are overwhelmed with coronavirus cases.
Dr. Thomas Oxley, a neurosurgeon at Mount Sinai Health System in Nueva York.
Look at this guy.
Tell me he doesn't get some snatch.
Handsome, nice smile, blue eyes,
fucking neurosurgeon.
I bet you this guy's pulling snatch out of Applebee's every other weekend.
Am I right?
What did he have to say?
There's growing evidence that COVID infection can cause the blood to clot in unusual ways,
and stroke would be an expected consequence of that.
I think that's how I'm going to go.
Dr. Thomas Oxley, neurosurgeon, I already read that, didn't I?
All were under the age of 50, people that he treated.
They all had mild symptoms of COVID-19 infection or no symptoms at all. The virus seems
to be causing increased clotting in large arteries leading to severe stroke. Our report shows a
sevenfold increase in incidence of sudden stroke in young patients during the past two weeks.
Sevenfold. Most of these patients have no past medical history, were at home with either mild symptoms or in two cases, no symptoms.
That's what's scary about this shit.
All tested positive.
Two of them delayed calling an ambulance.
It is not common for people so young to have strokes, especially strokes in the large vessels of the brain.
Then you sound kind of retarded after you have it.
Matt Damon.
Matt Damon.
Matt Damon.
The average person who has a large vessel stroke is severely impaired.
It means a bigger clot includes one of the largest arteries in the brain.
The most effective treatment for large vessel stroke is clot retrieval,
but this must be performed within six hours and sometimes within 24 hours, Oxley said.
The easy memory device for stroke, these are the, they came up a little acronym so you can
remember if somebody's having a stroke. It's called FAST, F for face drooping.
Somebody ought to check on Sylvester Stallone. It says a forearm weakness. Oh,
I'm sorry, A. F for face drooping, A for arm weakness. I can't even get a simple,
I think I'm having one. No, I don't feel good. A for Call somebody. A for S for speech difficulty
and T for time to call 911.
Yeah, I'm going to be doing that.
Somebody in my house is having a stroke.
What was it again? F is
did he fart?
S is for shitting his
tonsils? What?
Just look for this at the table.
By the way, when you're boarding airplanes, I told you this trick.
And they're boarding everybody before, but they make that announcement.
Anybody needs a little extra help.
You do the fake stroke walk.
You'll get right on there.
I do it all the time.
People go, you were fine 10 minutes ago.
I said, I just had two bags of beef jerky.
You know how much sodium is in that motherfucker?
Now get my bags, bitch. Anyway.
Anyways, ladies and gentlemen, time for a commercial. This is what keeps the show alive.
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Hey, how are you? How's your brother
doing? Not too good.
Too bad she wasn't holding his
hand at the hospital and then touched her eye.
Nick, what are you saying?
I just don't like her.
Don't want her dead.
Just kidding.
But come on.
Hey, you know who's a good guy?
Mr. Rogers.
Remember him?
Turns out he gave it to everybody.
It was known as AIDS back then.
No.
Tom Hanks proved once again he has a heart of gold after gifting a corona brand typewriter to an australian
boy who was bullied for having a name associated with the corona virus this poor kid his name's
corona why is everyone so fucking stupid why aren't more people interrogating like me
Why aren't more people interrogating like me?
So he befriended this kid and the kid says, I feel like I'm famous, exclaimed.
Queenland's Corona DeVries, eight years old, and a Reuters video upon receiving the present from his hero.
The kid's name is Corona.
His first name.
Can you imagine when the boy heard of the double Oscar winning actor's illness, he wrote, are you OK?
The correspondence was the start of their long distance friendship in the heartfelt letter, which aired on Australia's Channel 7.
DeVries tragically revealed that his schoolmates called him the Corona virus.
Of course they did. I would have been one of those kids. What are you going to do? Dicks are dicks.
Due to his COVID evoking epilation,
which made him sad
and it made him very angry.
Oh, boy, you.
Hanks.
Hanks wasn't one to see the boy suffer.
So dusting off his retro Corona typewriter,
which he would.
The fuck is he?
Angela Lansbury., which he would. The fuck is he? Angela Lansbury?
Corona, he wrote.
Which he happened to have brought with him to Australia.
He wrote back on April 10th.
Your letter made my wife and I feel so wonderful.
The Hollywood icon added,
you're the only person I've ever known
to have the name Corona.
Now he's making fun of him.
What the fuck?
Hanks went on to say,
what the fuck are your parents assholes?
Corona, let me meet your sister AIDS.
How's your cousin SARS doing?
You should tell your parents to shut up.
Then to further lift the bullying victim spirits,
Hanks bestowed derives with a vintage writing instrument
that bore his unique name.
I thought this typewriter would suit you, he said,
cheekily adding, ask a grown-up how it works
and use it to write me back.
What the kid should ask a grown-up?
Listen, Tom, he's starting to be a dick to me.
P.S., you got a friend in me, the star wrote
in reference to the immortal line uttered by his character Woody in a toy story.
So Tom Hanks, good guy.
And now let's hope the kids start picking on the kid, right?
There's no crying in baseball.
He said, I'm a friend to him.
The starstruck schoolboy tells Reuters, I'm going to write back soon.
He said, well, pound away on his on his namesake typewriter. Sweet story.
Tom, I have it too.
I have something called jaguar disease.
Can you send me one of those? I'm not talking about the animal metal bug.
God, I'm running out of cancer.
These things are delicious.
You're not supposed to.
So here's what we open this talking at the top of the show about.
President Trump reversed his course, says it's too soon for Georgia Governor Kemp to reopen the state.
So he's kind of backpedaling.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
So he's kind of backpedaling. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
President Trump said Wednesday he strongly disagrees with Georgia Governor Brian Kemp's decision to allow businesses like barbershops and nail salons to reopen a day after he praised him during the White House briefing.
I told the governor of Georgia, Brian Kemp, that I disagree strongly with his decision to open certain facilities.
Trump said that his daily coronavirus briefing Wednesday. But at the same time he must do what he thinks is right i want him to do what he thinks is right i'm not going to take the blame on the book no uh but i disagree with him on on what he's doing and of course he
does because he has fauci and dr burke's in his ear going no no we can't do this yet i applaud
the goddamn governor down here let's see what happens i'm a fax man. Kemp tweeted after the president's
remarks that he appreciated Trump's bold leadership and insight during these difficult times, but he
didn't back down. Our next measured step is driven by data and guided by state public health officials.
We will continue with this approach to protect the lives and livelihood of all Georgians, Kemp wrote.
and livelihood of all Georgians, Kemp wrote.
Kemp tweeted Monday, due to favorable data and more testing,
gyms, fitness centers, bowling alleys, body art studios,
barbers, cosmetologists, hair designers, nail care artists,
estheticians in their respective schools and massage therapists can reopen, that will be tomorrow, April 24th,
with minimum basic operation so
the governor's decision has been widely criticized by mayors in georgia as premature as well by
senator lindsey graham a top trump ally graham said wednesday night that he agreed with trump's
take i have great respect for the governor, Kemp, and I believe that the
future reopenings can occur rather quickly,
but we must get phase one right.
And then he retreated
to his apartment with his life partner, Kevin.
What?
Asked about Kemp's barbershop and tattoo
parlor plans Tuesday.
Dr. Deborah Burks, who has a tattoo of an eagle on her vagina.
What? No.
The White House coronavirus response coordinator said if there's a way that people can socially distance and do those things, then they can do those things.
I don't know how, but people are very creative, she said.
So it is it's a tough call.
And the reason he's getting a little flack is because, I mean,
you go in for a massage.
You can't get much closer, you know what I mean?
Or a haircut or whatever.
But God damn it, if my barber's open tomorrow,
my girl Brittany, hope you're watching, Brit.
Although, you know what?
I get my hair cut at a place called Ulta.
Is it Ulta? Yeah.
Ulta is a fucking, they sell cosmetics and shit.
It's like a department store.
I'm getting my hair cut like aisle three
next to a bunch of conditioners and shit.
They laugh at me because I guess it's common down here.
I go, this is like a store.
It's like I'm getting it cut at CVS
and they all fucking, that's how we do
it now. I said, you're weird.
But they're
very nice people and I could really
use a touch up.
See whether I can do
something with this. I want to get this
purple. Would that look gay? And then a yellow mohawk.
Colin Quinn said I should come on and reinvent
myself with a black turtleneck with yellow
lightning bolts call myself don carrado still he said that 10 years ago fucking makes me laugh
every time in a related story to trump uh reversing course as far as governor kemp opening georgia
this is a related story a democratic Democratic Georgia politician, Vernon Jones,
steps down after endorsing Trump. I love this guy. This guy's got a mind of his own.
Where am I? A Georgia Democrat state lawmaker, excuse me, announced Wednesday he will not complete
his current term a week after he got
blowback
for endorsing President Trump
and said he's leaving the plantation
this is what he said
and he said
he's leaving the plantation
an expression
popularized by black conservatives and independents.
I'm sick and tired of me and my family being attacked and harassed by the Democrat Party for putting my country before my party.
State Rep. Vernon Jones, who is black, said, good for him.
The party is over.
Turn out the lights, he said.
I have left the plantation.
I intend not to complete my term effective April 22.
However, I will remain woke and vigilant and educating and fighting for my people.
That's where you lose me a little bit, Vernon.
For all people, not your people.
When you say your people, it's like Ross Perot saying you people, unless you don't mind that.
Jones, 59, explained why he's through support behind Trump. I endorse the white guy.
This is why I love him. I endorse the white guy that let lets black people out of jail.
And then they endorse the white guy, Biden, that puts black people in jail.
And then they endorsed the white guy Biden that puts black people in jail.
He's kind of a one issue politician.
Jones, who represents parts of two counties outside of Atlanta, said Trump is the leader our country needed. On Twitter, Jones said that the left hates me because they can't control me.
Amen, brother.
After Jones endorsed Trump, Georgia Democrat Party chairwoman Nakima Williams said he does not stand for our values.
And then she released a statement saying this.
What folks says about this family, I does.
I has told you and told you that you can always tell a lady by the way that she eat in front of folks like a bird.
And I ain't aiming for you to go to Mr. John Wilkinson and eat like a field hand and gobbledygook.
Fucking Nakima Williams.
He doesn't stand for our values.
What, because he has a mind
of his own, Nakima?
Unbelievable.
Williams called him
an embarrassment.
You're a fucking embarrassment.
You are an embarrassment.
God.
Good for you, Vern.
Vernon Jones, tight end for the Eagle.
Here is the story that came out a couple days ago,
but it's important because it shows that these models are way off
and that you can understand why some governors are pushing back
because of stories like more
than 400 000 la county residents may have been infected with covet 19 uh they found that out
per ant of antibody study so uh this is very fucking interesting and uh son of a whore
anywhere between 220 and 442 000 la county residents could have been infected with covet
ls per newly released antibody study done in partnership with usc and the la county department 220,000 and 442,000 L.A. County residents could have been infected with COVID-19 per a newly
released antibody study done in partnership with USC and the L.A. County Department of Public
Health. The numbers represent preliminary results from the first round of testing done in early
April at a time when there were only 7,994 confirmed cases of the coronavirus showing that actual infections could have been 28 to 55 times
higher, reflecting an estimated 4.1% of the county's population, which totals around 10 million.
The data further confirms how easily transmittable the virus can be, while also significantly
dropping the county's mortality rate, which last week had risen to 4.2%.
dropping the county's mortality rate, which last week had risen to 4.2%. So what they're saying is all these people were walking around with it back in early April.
They only thought 8,000 people were infected.
So what that did, they were telling people it has a mortality rate of almost 4%.
But it turns out when you put the right numbers in, right, it's like 0.1% to 0.2%.
Not quite as lethal.
But again, these models are based on real-time information.
So this guy, Neeraj Sud, a U.S. professor of public policy at USC,
said the estimates suggest that the disease prediction models need to be recalibrated
as do public health strategies. That's why you're getting some pushback as far as closing down
certain counties. We are very early in the epidemic, Sood said. Many more could be infected,
and as the number of deaths increase, so will the number of hospitalizations and ICU admissions.
Public health officials across the country will be investigating the data as
it relates to mortality. While the mortality rate in LA County reached 4.2% last week,
the study suggests somewhere between 0.1 or 0.2%. Low stats that do provide some hope that this
disease, while extraordinarily devastating and causing death in a much shorter
period of time, is not as high a rate of death as what we are looking for.
It's like flu.
That's like flu mortality rates.
So if that's a fact, tell me, am I lying?
It's empty.
The researchers used a rapid antibody test administered with help from medical students
from usc's keck school of medicine uh usc researchers and public health officials at
six drive-through sites on april 10th through 11th research is planned to test new groups of
participants every few weeks in the coming months to gauge the pandemic's trajectory. Currently, L.A. County has 13,816 confirmed cases. Of the 617
fatalities top date, 17 of those are from the previous 24 hours, a sharp decrease from the
weekend when 81 fatalities were reported on Saturday alone. So the gist of that article is,
you know, it's very infectious. It spreads like wildfire,
but it's not as lethal as some of these models are telling you. All right. Now it's up to you,
folks, whether you want to go out or not. If you're afraid, stay the fuck home.
The other disgusting thing we didn't cover is all these big companies, when they sent out all
these checks to small businesses, these big companies when they sent out all these checks to small businesses these big companies like publicly listed corporations took the goddamn money hogged
it fucking vacuumed it up harvard harvard they have a 40 billion dollar endowment they got like
10 11 million trump said no they're giving it fucking back he had to shame him on public tv
unbelievable mom and pop stores all the small but they're the lifeblood of capitalism in this He had to shame him on public TV. Unbelievable.
Mom and pop stores, all the small, but they're the lifeblood of capitalism in this country.
It's still the truth.
So it's pretty disgusting what went on.
I want to thank people who contribute to the show because that's how we stay alive.
You can go to NickDip.com, make, you know, find financial contributions because the show is now free Monday through Thursday.
And you can also sign up at Patreon.com.
If you want to be a monthly subscriber, you'll get an extra story.
You get to ask me a question, access to all the shows. But I want to thank, as of yesterday, Michael Behrens, Illinois.
David Botter, Pennsylvania.
Michael Baird, Pennsylvania.
Dominic Peluso, New York, Jack Foster, the United Kingdom, David Thomas, Michigan, Russell Buckner, Tennessee, Daniel Dolan, Newinha, Dick Gozinha, and Paul Bedore.
They all signed up at Patriot.com.
Patreon.
What did I say?
Patriot?
Fuck, I think I got the virus.
I'm stroking out, Rez.
What was it?
Fast?
Troopy face?
Retarded head? Thank you guys so
much. And again, if you have a small company, whatever, a big company, you want to be a sponsor
of the show because you believe in freedom of speech and you believe in being entertained.
You can only watch so much Netflix. I'm watching Ozark. If you want to fucking,
it could be a great show, but it was made in Hollywood by ultra liberal
douche bag they make every
stereotype about fucking white
people in Missouri in the Ozarks
boy if they ever
use such stereotypes
to betray black and brown people
and right now some live there they do
no they fucking don't
you got a gay detective with his black
boyfriend getting they show him getting blown and you got a girl detective with his black boyfriend getting, they show him getting
blown. And you got a girl who's like 18, a little Ozark chick, very street smart, kicks two guys in
the bar. I mean, just there's a lot of that feminist anger out there. And the whole subtext
of the show, hey, doing a show over here. The fuck was that?
Evel Knievel's jumping cars in the parking lot.
Anyways, watch Ozarks.
And if you think like I do,
and if you learn from listening to me for the last 30 years about what to look for,
you don't even have to look for it.
It jumps out at you now
at how stupid they portray the white guys and shit.
Other than that, Jason Bateman's great.
It's well-acted. There's titty, Jason Bateman's great. It's well acted.
You know, his titty bar scenes, his violence, his drug cartels.
It's tremendous.
But it's so politically correct that I know the ends of scenes.
You know what I mean?
When a woman's having a showdown, she's a lib on the show,
having a showdown with a highly respected Republican politician,
I know how it's going to turn out because I know who made the shit.
It gives it away.
It ruins it.
Try to put your agenda away for five minutes when you make these things, could you?
Pandemic drone test flights are monitoring social distancing.
This type of shit gives me the creeps.
The flights taking place in a COVID-19 hotspot in Connecticut use sensors to detect the virus symptoms from afar.
You guys should be getting the willies from this shit.
They're literally spying on you with drones.
Drone manufacturer Dragonfly is working with the police department in Westport, Connecticut.
That's a really rich town to test the drones located in Fairfield County.
It's right next to New York City.
Westport was the first town in the state to report several coronavirus infections, according to Dragonfly.
The drones include specialized sensor and computer vision systems that can display a person's temperature,
heart and respiratory rates, as well as detect people sneezing or coughing in a crowd,
the technology can accurately detect infectious conditions from 190 feet away.
That's a little creepy, okay?
As well as measures,
as well as measures social distancing efforts.
How do you know if I got the fucking virus or i do smoke
you guys getting creeped out you think this shit's gonna go away when the pandemic's over
if it's ever over huh cops are using this shit now some of these things in new jersey that they
use were made in china it's fucking it's so orwellian and getting creepy
out there the drones don't use facial recognition tech oh well gee thanks and won't be used at
people's private yeah sure it won't trust me you're gonna fucking you're gonna get up you're
gonna be making coffee in the morning and you're gonna spread the curtains in the kitchen there's
gonna be a drone out there fucking looking at you.
Yeah, I won't be using private rivers in my ass.
Rather, they're used to identify patterns within the population, allowing officials
to better track the spread and make decisions
about public places.
This shit's
not going to go away. When they talk about the world
permanently changing, because
the left, the far left,
the power-hungry grubbers they love this
shit look at all the cities that have these draconian lockdowns all run by dems you're
horrible people i'll tell you who wasn't a horrible person this is this story is going to date me
mike curtis i hope some of you fans of my age if you are and you're a football fan you know
who mike curtis was he died yesterday he was a linebacker white linebacker again it was the late 60s early 70s
he died at 77 he was one of my favorite players though and i'll tell you why you're gonna see why
mike curtis a hard-hitting no-nonsense linebacker who helped the colts win a super bowl during a
14-year career spent mostly in baltimore he at 77, and that made me sad, man, because he's gone,
and we couldn't do nothing about it.
He died in St. Petersburg, Florida on Monday.
His son Clay said on Twitter his father died of complications from CTE.
That football player is a boy.
But, boy, he lasted 77.
Curtis earned the nickname Mad Dog.
Of course he did.
Because of his fierce play in the middle of a strong Baltimore defense.
One of the game's most legendary non-Hall of Famers, ferocious.
Ferocious on the field, the gentleman off the field.
Colts owner Jim Irsay said that.
He was a four-time Pro Bowl linebacker, had his best season in 1970.
I was already watching football.
I was born in 62.
I was already two or three years into the NFL.
Had his best season in 70, intercepted five passes.
Then in the Super Bowl against Dallas, he picked off a pass in the waning minutes
to set up the winning field goal by Jim O'Brien.
Remember it.
The following year, Curtis delivered what some believe to be his most memorable hit
when an intoxicated fan ran onto the field,
snatched the football between plays in a game against the Dolphins
on December 11, 1971.
I remember this.
This is what made me love this guy.
Check out this video
when he does it,
a drunk guy on the field.
And this poor guy is drunk as a skunk.
And I mean, he's running away
and he's all smiles.
And all of a sudden,
this blue dart comes out of our hood.
I just stepped out there and popped him.
I didn't hurt him in the ball.
I didn't hurt him.
What? Watch it. Do it again.
Watch the referee catch the ball.
And this poor guy is drunk as a skunk.
I mean, he's running away and he's all smiling.
Watch the ref catch the ball.
This blue dart comes out of our hole.
I just stepped out there and popped him.
Bad dog.
I didn't hurt him in the ball.
I didn't hurt him. Lo ball. I didn't hurt him.
Loved him.
He's gone.
Not the way you can go about it.
That's how I know I'm getting old.
All my idols.
I had posters of all these motherfuckers in the room.
And the smart guy, too.
He started a real estate company.
Just one of those guys that can do anything.
Tough as damn. He tackled around the head. He loved a real estate company. Just one of those guys that could do anything. Tough as day.
He tackled around the head. He loved fucking taking your head. Half his tackles
would be booted today.
Football was football
before they put on miniskirts.
Don't hurt the quarterback.
Guy was vicious. Speaking
of sports, did you see the ESPN commercial
that they ran?
It was one of those deep fake video
technology things that's creeping me out. Unable to film new commercials during the coronavirus
pandemic, advertising agencies are turning to technology that can seamlessly alter old footage,
sometimes putting viewers in a position of doubting what they're seeing. During Sunday's
episode of The Last Dance, that's the documentary ESPN's running about Michael Jordan and the Bulls.
State Farm ran a commercial featuring expertly doctored footage of the longtime SportsCenter anchor Kenny Mayne, who we all know.
In the ad, a much younger Mr. Mayne is seated at the SportsCenter desk. In 1998, he reports on the Bulls' sixth championship title before taking a turn toward the prophetic.
Check this out. They use his watch this let's get right to it the chicago bulls have won their second three-peat this is the kind
of stuff that espn will eventually make a documentary about they'll call it something
like the last dance and make it a 10-part series and release it in the year 2020 it's gonna be lit
you don't even know what that means yet while i'm making predictions jeans will get extra tight dance and make it a 10-part series and release it in the year 2020. It's going to be lit. You
don't even know what that means yet. While I'm making predictions, jeans will get extra tight.
There'll be a thing called a butt fumble, and this clip will be used to promote the documentary
in a State Farm commercial. It's just a hunch. How weird. How weird and clever, and that's all
fun and good. It's already starting you got politicians you know
you could have trump on there with his matter of fact he used trump use of technology
remember that ad we showed where uh the guy from state farm the black guy sitting with
the other two yeah and obama's on this screen i sit with obama they put obama's head on the
black guy from state farm but they made that look phony so people knew that they were just fucking around.
But this is going to be so dangerous.
I mean, you know what I mean?
You could actually, you know, have Liz Warren saying sensible shit.
See how seamless that was?
It's creepy.
The producers made the commercial by layering video of mr main's 60 year
old mouth onto footage of his 38 year old face to many viewers the stunt provided a welcome moment
of levity in depressing times others were made uneasy by the smoothness of the patch describing
it as a type of deep fake uh ms brazinski sue said manipulated footage was likely to appear in future espn ads
and executives at several major advertising agencies said they had discussed making similar
commercials with their clients in uh recent weeks that's a little creepy i know a thing or two about
a thing or two we're so restricted in how we can generate content said kerry hill production
director of the ad agency FCB.
Anything that can be computer generated is something we're going to explore.
Husani Oakley, the chief technology officer of the ad firm Deutsch, said digitally altered ads should somehow clue viewers into the fact that what they're seeing is not completely real.
Yeah, well, ad companies might do that but you wait to i mean the scary shit
about that is the average adult can make this stuff now they said you need very you know if
you're a good photoshop you can do this it's getting creepy what's gonna happen when they
start putting out oh trump said this you know schumer said that and it's not even them
dangerous stuff the technology is here and it's not even them. Dangerous stuff.
The technology is here and it's only going to get better and better.
We have to get used to it, he added.
We're exploring ways to have fun with it.
This year, the ad firm Goodby, Silverstein and Partners worked on an app that allowed users to appear to be doing the dance moves pulled off by little Nas.
I remember doing it in a Doritos commercial.
Executives described the experience as turning deep fake into dance fake.
Oh, you clever motherfuckers.
Here's where it's getting weird, though, OK?
While the blurring of the real and fake can be amusing on Zoom or in the promotion of snack foods, it presents thorny ethical issues around consent and disinformation. Pornographic deepfake videos with real seeming political figures
and celebrities and central roles have circulated already on Reddit.
Christy, get down on your knees so Sabrina can see your asshole.
A recent doctored video appeared to show prime minister sophie welms of belgium
linking the coronavirus pandemic to climate change see they're already starting to use it
uh ahead of the 2020 vote facebook and twitter have said they're closely monitoring the manipulated
videos on monday trump promoted a digitally altered commercial promoting his candidacy on
twitter account the video relied on doctored footage taken from an all-state insurance commercial featuring the company's pitchman
dennis hazebert that's the one we're talking about uh where they put they put obama's head
on his body and he's sitting with three guys and biden's on tv saying stupid shit and they look at
obama uh the videos get more than 14 million views and it ends with a trump pence logo
so anyways uh that's kind of creepy.
You know, that's going to be used for evil and not good, you know, but I kind of like
to, I'd like to see some of those, uh, well, yeah, you know, you could have like, uh, Bernie
Sanders banging Jennifer Aniston.
You just, I wrote the damn bill.
Shut your hole.
I'd like to spread your ass cheeks.
Come up to my house in Vermont.
The wife's out of the.
Anyways, that is it.
That is it for the week, ladies and gentlemen.
We thank you so much again for continuing to contribute.
I know things at times are tough out there.
Hopefully you guys are getting some relief.
Small businesses and, you know, getting loans for families.
And it's weird.
I can't wait for tomorrow here to see how this.
I'm just missing sitting at a bar.
I came down here.
I found about 11 bars that I like to
partake in. One of them, World of Beer.
You know what I do? I have a couple drinks
and there's an Olive Garden about 100 feet away and I walk in there. That's how drunk I am.
I've been in the Olive,
I've never been, I've been in an Olive Garden once in been I had been in Oligarch once in my life down in Jacksonville
Florida I've been three times and it's dog shit just like they say it is but when you get like
Jack Daniels in you you know I got chicken palm I don't give a fuck how much they can anyways
uh all right uh that is it you guys uh thanks again Don't forget Cameo.com. I'll make a personal video.
You tell me who to send it to, roasting them or whatever.
And again, you people with businesses, if you want to sponsor the show,
we'd love that too.
Go to NickDip.com.
You think it, I will say it.
You're very welcome.
And again, we thank you.
We'll see you back here on Monday.
Have a great weekend. We'll see back here on Monday. Have a great weekend. guitar solo I'm out.