The Nick DiPaolo Show - Hunter Biden Racist Just Like Dad | Nick Di Paolo Show #553
Episode Date: June 9, 2021NJ teacher rightly resigns because of CRT. Hunter Biden text messages. More proof homophobia barely exists....
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Hey everybody, free speech is under attack and it doesn't matter if you're a comedian like me or our commander-in-chief, the old one, the real one.
And it's not just the media anymore, it's the people who run our hospitals, teach our kids.
We can't let this happen, we have to keep telling the truth and that's what I try and do every day on this show.
As you know, Twitter shadow banned me and YouTube blocked me,
but you know what? They can't stop me. And then I'm going to, I'm putting the finishing touches
on my new platform where I can say whatever I want. And yes, I'll be giving it away for free.
In the meantime, I'm going to use YouTube and use the other platforms to help spread the word so we are
bigger and stronger when I make the jump. I also need your help to continue to build a platform
and keep this show and future shows free. Please consider contributing at nickdip.com and know that
your contribution keeps free speech and my style of free speech alive,
which is the best style.
Thanks a lot, everybody, and thanks for your support.
Do not come.
Do not come.
I'm going to come.
And then I'm going to leave a 50 on your dresser like I did last night. Good day, everybody.
Welcome to the big show.
Nice to be with you again.
Matthew behind the controls again.
And what happened with the cat, Matt?
Let's get the...
So I made the mistake of buying a new kitten,
and that fucker gave my old cat an upper respiratory infection.
Like COVID?
Yeah.
Cat COVID?
Pretty much.
And he spent the last week, like, sneezing.
But when he sneezes, it sounds like there's a kazoo lodged in his head.
Oh, that's definitely Chinese.
Yeah, exactly.
That's weird, you know, because I have read uh both dogs and cat two different articles
talking about you know uh whatever i don't believe anybody just put a mask on it uh whatever
so that's what it was i thought you were having an old cat put to sleep or something not yet
yeah i'll do that you call me i have a special shovel for that. Anyways, let's get to the rotten world in which
we live in since the fake president has taken over. And boy, are they making assholes of In our eating libs segment today,
the woman whose school's Allison Camerata is a woman named Jenin Younes.
What am I talking about?
Camerata is now, Allison Camerata is a CNN talking head.
She used to be on Fox, and somebody asked a good question online.
Was she lying when she got the job at Fox at how liberal,
or is she lying now just to get a paycheck from CNN?
Either way, she's a fucking dope.
I used to like her for about five minutes when I thought she was conservative,
but I guess she's full of shit.
We don't know.
We do know she'll do anything
for a paycheck, like myself. Anyways, she was talking to a woman, this Jenin Nyons, and she's
like a civil rights attorney. So she's no righty. She's actually a lefty, if you read her resume. I
think she went to Cornell and stuff. Anyways, they were talking about the vaccine and whatnot.
And boy, did Allison really, they really, she showed what CNN, who they hire and how sharp they are.
And just this woman made a bit of an asshole of her.
Let's take a look, shall we?
Tell me about your hesitancy.
What's it based on?
I've had COVID in February, so I have natural immunity.
There's no reason for me to get the vaccine.
There's no reason for me to take the vaccine.
It does this from vulnerable people in this country or in other countries who need it more than I do.
You just don't know how long your natural immunity will last.
We don't know how long the immunity from the vaccine lasts.
This is taking on a religious mentality on the progressive liberal side of the spectrum.
So it's changed my politics.
Now I'll vote for anybody who cares about civil liberties
and who doesn't allow the trampling of our rights that we've seen over the past year.
Jennifer, I see you applauding.
So tell me your thoughts.
I'm loving hearing her talk right now.
Everything she says, I basically agree with.
Ha ha ha!
Allison gets bitch slapped.
Ha ha ha!
This is CNN, the most trusted name in the U.S.
Yeah, sure it is.
Even when she said, what's your hesitancy?
You know what the woman should have said?
Shut up.
Mind your fucking business and shut up.
What do you give a fuck?
That's the new thing now.
Why aren't you getting none of your fucking business?
Oh, I don't know.
I'll just take the slogan that you feminists created about 40 years ago.
My body, my choice.
I feel bad.
I get relatives who got the Vax.
I'm a little fucking nervous for them.
I'll be honest.
You don't know what the fuck's in that.
Even if you did,
I wouldn't take it
because of the way they marketed it,
like my pillow.
There was something very suspicious
about how hard they were pushing that.
And if you read your history,
they say it's the vaccine,
not the virus,
it could be dangerous.
I'm Chinese, I'll tell you.
I can say a lot about them,
but they're sneaky fucks.
Always said that.
Nick, that's just a stereotype.
They're very bright people.
Like I said, their country's been around a zillion years.
We're the new kids on the block, and they are playing us like a fiddle.
They're playing the long game.
Luckily, I'm 59.
I won't have to learn Mandarin in a few years like the rest of you.
That means go fuck yourself. 559. I won't have to learn Mandarin in a few years like the rest of you.
That means go fuck yourself.
What else we got today?
Oh, God.
Speaking of COVID, this dovetails perfectly into it.
Philly, the city of brotherly love, which is so hilariously named.
We're brothers.
Kill each other every time they look at each other.
They have this naked bike ride every year.
Show your ass, this year it's called,
show your ass but wear a mask.
That's what I call it.
It's just, it's just,
anything to get on the internet, I guess.
You know what I mean?
The annual Philly naked bike ride is officially scheduled
for August 28th, organizers say.
The free-spirited ride, which encourages nakedness and has been labeled as a
bear-as-you-dare event, will require masks based on city's earlier coronavirus restrictions.
Look at those people.
Aren't they delicious?
You never looked heavier.
Ugh.
How'd you like to be a bike seat in Philly in August?
Oh, that's a guy.
I thought that was a woman, the second one in.
Can you fucking imagine?
First of all, they've lifted pretty much all the restrictions in Philly.
And, like, this is virtue signaling, once again.
This is what's creeping me out.
I'm watching the Red Sox last night, full ballpark, and Alex Cora still has a mask on,
and the other manager. Somebody explain this to me.
And in hockey, full rink, coach has the mask on. Now, you got to believe that the government's telling the network to tell the
coaches, why would you be, you're around 18,000 people who don't have masks on. So I guess it's
safe. Why would you still be wearing it? Unless somebody's telling you to. Because sporting events
get millions of eyes on them, right? It's a great way to peddle this horse shit. And there's still
people wearing masks.
And they're not going to go away.
Somebody said they might never go away.
You know, the jerk-off lefties who just want a virtue signal 24 hours a day.
Look, I'm a good person.
I'm doing what the government says.
That's who's fucking wearing them.
These people in Philly should tie that around their ball sacks before I get on their 10 speeds.
Yuck, yuck.
should tie that around their ball sacks before I get on their 10 speeds. Yuck, yuck. This year's event is being called the Mask Edition, according to promotions posted on social media. I say if
you live in Philly, get down there with a slingshot and a bucket of rocks. Last week,
Philadelphia officials lifted most of its COVID-19 rules, including limits on capacity
and social distancing requirements for businesses and
events.
You're outside, for Christ's sake.
You're naked.
Organizers of the ride said they have yet to discuss the recent change.
What's there to discuss?
There's nothing to discuss, shitheads.
We haven't discussed it yet.
So they haven't discussed the recent changes
in the coronavirus guidelines.
So they're going to stick with, you know,
our initial mask guidance.
Why would you do that?
That's faggot stuff.
Oh my God, is it ever.
You want to call it by its name?
That's strictly for fags.
The annual event typically sees people gather
at a local park to disrobe and paint their bodies before saddling up
with thousands of riders on a 10-mile course throughout the city. Riders normally take in
sites that include Independence Hall and the Liberty Bell. What better way to see the Liberty
Bell than your ball sack or your giant fucking clit hanging out? Or maybe you have both. I want to be inclusive here.
The annual ride was canceled last year
due to the pandemic.
In their decision, organizers said
they hoped the city would be farther along
in the reopening process
to make it feasible to hold this year's event.
And again, they have moved along,
but apparently you haven't.
Do you have to be virtue signaling around the clock?
Look at me.
I have no mask on.
Jesus, I don't know if I like that shot or not, Matt.
I was 220 and a half pounds today.
That is it.
Watch me melt.
That's the heaviest I've ever been.
That is it.
Watch me melt.
That's the heaviest I've ever been.
Granted, some of it's muscle,
because I work out and I'm on the testosterone therapy or whatever.
But I thought I would lose at least a pound and a half because my testicles have shrunk from the testosterone.
That's right.
I had the balls of a great dame before I got on this shit.
For the love of God. I had the balls of a great day before I get on this shit. For the love
of God. I'm serious. I'm fucking...
That's it. Last night...
I'm like one of those people on
my 600-pound life lately.
Around 10 o'clock.
Like an idiot. I don't eat all day.
Around 10 o'clock,
I go into this pantry we have.
I don't even buy it.
My wife does the shopping.
She's like one of those AIDS victims.
She can eat anything.
Pounds just melt.
AIDS victim.
I don't even know what that fucking meant.
Anyways, I went nuts last night.
It was fucking embarrassing.
And I go, you know what?
Fuck it.
Ate a half a bag of popcorn.
Then I go in the fridge.
It's too many pudding snack pack
things.
I break out the Cool Whip.
I eat the pudding with the Cool Whip and then I eat most of the Cool Whip out of the bowl.
And then about a half hour later I go in there again and I get roasted peanuts.
I eat those and leftover chicken, what I had made for dinner.
And then I go, why do I look heavy this morning?
I'm like a bitch with that, I'll be honest.
What can I tell you? I'm a vain guy.
Speaking of vain guys, guess who's back in the news again for a second day in a row?
This Marxist cocksucker, this racial arsonist will not go away.
He's what set us on this path to
fucking George Floyd and Ferguson and everything else. You can deny it till you're blue in the face.
Barack Obama, bullshit artist, former President Obama is claiming right-wing media outlets
are profiting by stoking fear and resentment among white people toward a changing.
This is what he kept saying when he was president.
And you're so fucking wrong.
What makes you think white people fear change?
If it's change for the better, we don't fear it.
That's how great this country got.
And not through the help of people who think like you.
You dick.
We don't fear anything. Everybody
accepts gay marriage, a gay lifestyle. You won the culture wars, okay? We're not afraid of black
and brown people. A guy like me who's a right winger and maybe a bigot moves to a predominantly
black town. You're full of shit, Barack. Quit telling us how we feel about change. The change you cocksuckers are bringing on, we fear.
Call Marxism slash socialism.
Some of us of any stripe, any racial or any ethnicity,
liked the way the country was before jerk-offs like you showed up.
It's not that we fear it.
You hate this fucking country.
You said it when you got elected.
We're going to fundamentally change.
You don't fundamentally change something you love.
Ask my wife.
She's been trying for years.
Still a dick.
But white people are, you know,
we're nervous of change in America.
He's pointing to national pushback
on critical race theory as an example.
Can you imagine?
Oh, so we don't like racist indoctrination of our children.
Not only white people.
I've already done a couple stories of black people
saying this is pure racism.
But you don't say that.
You're not even that fucking bright. I've got to be
honest with you. God bless affirmative
action. I could shoot
19 holes in your stupid theory.
The 44th
commander-in-chief told Anderson Cooper,
his love partner, in a CNN
special Monday
that many race problems are
a reflection of the United States
not having fully reconciled with our history.
Really?
Who ended fucking slavery?
We didn't start it.
Who ended it on the globe?
We haven't faced the fucking, the original sin?
It's all we do.
It's all we fucking do.
So your way of confronting it
is tearing down statues
getting rid of books that were written by
brilliant white people
you're using the same shit
that ISIS does when they take over a country
that's the solution
you fucking
miserable
god
let's listen to Dopey who was raised by the way Fucking miserable. God.
Let's listen to Dopey,
who was raised, by the way,
by fucking Marxists.
Communists, actually.
Frank whatever Davis.
Anyways, let's take a look at the first clip he's talking about
PC cancel culture.
A lot of the dangers
of cancel culture and we're just going to be
condemning people all the time, at least among my daughters, that they'll acknowledge that
sometimes among their peer group or in college campuses, you know, you'll see folks going
overboard. Even when he, even when he tries to be a little tolerant, some folks, some folks go a little overboard.
Why don't you just come out and go,
some folks that think like my daughters,
kind of liberal, go way overboard
to the point where they don't even let
certain Republicans speak on campus.
They go a little overboard.
But he just says folks, meaning both sides.
I love when they equivocate like that.
Who said that?
Barack.
Who the fuck said that?
Barack Hussein Obama.
Who's the slimy little commoner shit twinkle toed cocksucker down here
who just signed his own death warrant?
And then in the second clip, you know, he makes it sound so innocuous.
Well, you know, we're not asking everybody to be perfect.
He talks about calling people out.
Here you go, more lying.
We don't expect everybody to be perfect.
We don't expect everybody to be politically correct all the time.
But we are going to call out institutions or individuals if they are being cruel,
if they are discriminating against people.
We do want to raise awareness.
Do you? Do you really?
Critical race theory. That's cruel.
It's an indoctrinating, it's making young white kids hate themselves.
And teaching kids of color to only see white people through the lens of color.
That's not fucking evil?
Are you calling that out?
Do you really believe he doesn't understand that?
He's got a hard-on over this shit.
Oh, God.
He said it was hard for the majority of white Americans to recognize you can be proud of
this country and its traditions and its history and our forefathers.
And yet it also it's also true that terrible stuff happened.
Really?
Terrible stuff.
Yeah, we haven't acknowledged that at all in this country.
It's all we do.
He says the vestiges of that linger and continue.
Obama said.
Well, thanks to you and shit like critical race theory.
It still lingers.
It's all you talk about.
It's your side crying racism every three seconds.
Somebody says the N-word on a football field and it's a story for 24 hours.
Every rap song has the N-word in it.
It's misogynist.
It still lingers.
Yeah.
Because if you guys didn't have the race card,
you wouldn't have anything to hang your hat on.
You'd have nothing.
Ugh.
He says, I also think that there are certain right-wing media venues
that monetize and capitalize on stoking the fear and resentment of a white population that is witnessing a changing America and seeing demographic changes, he said, without identifying specific outlets.
He won't mention Fox News.
Will you shut up? Will you? Will you please shut up?
Why not mention it? You did while you were president.
Please shut up!
Why not mention it?
You did while you were president.
So Fox News is capital.
They're monetizing.
Yet CNN's website makes more money than all of them with their stupid fucking headlines.
Race this, cop that.
But it's just the right wing.
The two conservative outlets that we have
out of the six million media outlets that exist,
they're the ones making money he can't be fucking serious he can't be serious does he really believe a word of that
only fox is turning a profit you know because they're they're racist and
he says they do everything they can to give people a sense that their way
of life is threatened and that people are trying to take advantage of them which they are look at
critical race theory look at defunding the police look at making half the um the fucking language
in this country off limits to white people. Of course they're fucking irritated.
They're not scared, though. That's where you're wrong.
And if you keep pushing, you're going to find out how not scared they really are.
Oh, God.
White people, we're just scared.
You know, it's a changing country.
You're pussies.
I'm staying right here.
That's right, Mr. Obama.
He ripped Republicans for ignoring major issues like the economy and climate change
to instead suggest that the biggest, single, most important issue right now is critical race theory.
And then like the pompous jerk off he is, he goes,
who knew that was the threat to our republic?
He says with a fucking chuckle.
I'm going to fucking smash his fucking face in
it is a threat i can't believe he's not
poo-pooing critical race theory i honestly he used to be a little bit fair and i'll say it
again like i did yesterday the fact that they're putting him on tv again shows how nervous they are
because there's a lot of people on the left, like the lady we just showed, going, these people are out of their fucking minds.
And then they put him on because, you know, he's still a god to the people on the left.
So they're like, oh, we're on the right track.
Meanwhile, Kamala Harris doesn't know what the fuck she's doing.
Biden is out of his mind.
If I was China, I'd be banging on the front door right now.
Russia, too.
Oop, hope Putin doesn't see this.
The former president said seeing his daughters participate
in Black Lives Matter protests
after George Floyd's murder in Minneapolis last year
gave him a great source of optimism, is what he said.
I despise it with every fiber of my being.
Yeah, it made me feel good, too,
to see your daughters out there
just hating the country just like their dad.
My daughters are so much wiser
and more sophisticated and gifted
than I was at their age.
Excuse me.
They're wiser and more gifted than you are now.
Ugh, Obama said with a laugh,
and then Anderson Cooper
rubbed cocoa butter all over his ass.
Ay, ay, ay, ay, ay, ay, ay.
He used to pretend to be a little fair about race,
but the fact he doesn't have a problem with critical race there.
Can anybody stop it out there?
Are there any lawyers who lean right that have any skills? Can anybody stop it out there?
Are there any lawyers who lean right that have any skills whatsoever?
Homeschool your kids.
I know you're busy enough, folks.
But, you know,
I would never send my kids to college today.
I'd send them to DeVry.
They learn how to work air conditioning.
Then you can drop the N-bomb anytime you want at work.
What?
I'm kidding.
Don't get all upset.
Here's a case in point.
New Jersey teacher resigns, and rightly so, because of evil critical race theory.
and rightly so because of evil critical race theory.
An English teacher in New Jersey has resigned from a top Jersey prep school that is using critical race theory to create a hostile culture of conformity and fear,
causing white and male students to believe they are oppressors, she said.
Dana Stangle Plow accused Dwight Englewood School.
Who the fuck's Dwight Englewood?
In Bergen County of forcing students and faculty to embrace a single set of beliefs, choking off free speech in the process.
Just like every college, middle school, kindergarten.
The process, just like every college, middle school, kindergarten.
A graduate of Cornell University, okay?
So she's a teacher and she's an Ivy Leaguer.
Not exactly a far right wing zealot.
Anyways, graduate of Cornell University and a published poet.
Roses are red, violets are blue.
Democrats can fuck off,
so can you. Good night, everybody.
Stangle Plow has taught English to high school students
at Dwight Englewood since
2014.
Her resignation letter and materials
from the school were published on the
website for the Foundation
Against Intolerance and Racism,
that would be fair, which was founded by
private school parent Bayan Bartning earlier this year to combat critical race theory teachings
in school and promote a pro-human agenda. God forbid. But here's a lady doing good,
bright, obviously, Ivy League, okay? And it's way too much for her.
And Barack doesn't see that?
Here's what she had to say.
And you know what? God bless Miss Hannah, not for this crap.
Today I am resigning from a job that I love.
My name is Dana
Stangleplow. I became an English
teacher at Dwight Englewood School
seven years ago because as a parent, I loved how the school both nurtured and challenged my own
children. But over the past few years, the school has embraced an ideology that is damaging to our
students' intellectual and emotional growth, an ideology that requires students to see themselves
not as individuals, but as representatives of either an oppressor or oppressed group. This theoretical framework pervades
every division of Dwight Englewood as the singular way of seeing the world. As
a result, students now arrive in my classroom accepting ideology simply as
fact. I've seen up close how this hinders their ability to read, write, and think.
They've become obsessed with power hierarchies.
I teach students who recoil from a poem
because it was written by a man.
I teach students who approach texts
in search of the oppressor,
who see iniquities in texts
that have nothing to do with power.
This ideology limits students' ability
to observe and engage with the full fabric
of human experience in our literature.
Okay. Okay, all true. Wake up, white people.
Well, she's awake.
Stangle Plow alleged that on two occasions in 2017 and 2018, the head of school told
the entire faculty that he would fire us all if he could so that he could
replace us all with people of color.
Do we have a picture of the jerk off that runs that said that?
Oh, there he is.
There he is.
Just looks, I can just smell lib on him.
What you just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard.
Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it.
May God have mercy on your soul.
Was he talking about his job, by the way?
Is he going to put that up?
Did he mention that?
Probably not. They want you to put that up? Did he mention that? Probably not.
They want you to put your job on the market.
And that's true.
You know what?
I'd be with him if he included himself.
All you libs out there that say white privilege,
you got to where you were because of white privilege, right?
Fucking quit.
And replace yourself with a person of color.
Put your fucking money where your mouth is
or shut the fuck up.
In 2019, the educator said she expressed concern
about negative experiences among hostile
and doctrinaire colleagues.
Let me translate that for you.
Probably two other black teachers, you know,
bumped into her, pushed her around in the coffee room because she wasn't going along with the curriculum.
But said her complaints fell on deaf ears.
Well, yeah, because you're a white woman.
They don't give a fuck.
As a result of the school's anti-racist teachings,
she said her students have become obsessed with power structures and group identity.
I reject DE's essentials, racialist thinking about myself, my colleagues, and my students, Stengelplau wrote.
DE, that's the school, claims that we teach students how to think, not what to think.
But sadly, that is just no longer true.
Joe Algrant, the principal of Dwight Englewood's upper school, told the Post
he could not comment on personnel matters because he lacks the balls to.
You can act like a man. What's the matter with you?
In this case, all I can say is that Ms. Stangleplow notified us several months ago that she would not be returning next school year, he said in an email.
The little bitch.
And why all the teachers don't feel this way.
Like, there's plenty, like I said, plenty of people of all colors
that don't like this critical.
It's amazing.
They've been screaming at the right,
calling us bigots and racists for 40, 50 years now.
First of all, they're the party of slavery.
And now they've made,
literally made racism legal
against, you know, the oppressor white people.
All the shit that they've been yelling at us about,
they are doing.
They were projecting.
They really believe, I guess,
they really believe, like, you know what?
Black people went through a lot.
Now it's your turn.
You really think that could happen here?
You're using South Africa as a model?
I wouldn't.
A lot of guns over here.
I mean, if you want to keep pushing it.
Hunter Biden.
How did I get on Hunter Biden?
Sometimes the stories that look for segues, they just don't.
There's no connection whatsoever.
But Hunter, you know, you can connect it to white privilege, I guess.
I mean, talk about white privilege.
Fucking old man gets him a job on some energy board making millions of dollars a year with the Chinese.
There's a connection I could have come up with.
Hunter Biden text filled with the word nigga.
N-I-G-G-A.
Can you imagine this clean cut kid who smokes crack?
I don't believe it.
this clean-cut kid who smokes crack?
I don't believe it.
The president's son joked in a January 2019 text to corporate attorney George Mazires,
probably saying that wrong,
but about a big penis
and said to the lawyer,
I only love you because you're black
and true dat, nigga,
which he's not.
He's obviously a white guy. And I don't like that
type of talk, Hunter. Gotta watch your fucking mouth since your dad was spending the whole
weekend in Tulsa rehashing that massacre. In another text a month earlier, he wrote to the Chicago lawyer saying, how much money do I owe you?
Because, nigga, you better not be charging me Hennessy rates.
Oh, my God, this guy.
But you ain't, y'all.
You're not.
Mazires of Mezzeries replied, that made me snarf my coffee, proving he's a white guy.
What other fucking black guy ever said snarf?
I've never even heard of it.
Hunter added, that's what I'm saying, nigga.
Cutting off, oh, he said, that's what I'm saying, nuh.
Cutting off the racial slur mid-word, then texted a picture to Mazires.
off the racial slur mid-word, then texted a picture to Mazires. In addition to the text messages,
Hunter's laptop is said to contain a meme depicting his father and former President Barack Obama,
which includes a racist slur. The meme is a photo of Biden hugging Obama with the following captions.
I think we have the, here you go, Obama, gonna miss you, man. Joe, can I say it just this once? Obama, sigh. Ah, go ahead. Joe, you my nigga, Barack. That's just a meme. We know Joe
didn't say that. It's probably a lot worse. He doesn't say it kidding around.
He did say of Barack when he first started running for president.
He's clean.
He's got a nice smile.
He's articulate.
He actually showers for a colored guy.
We can't believe that.
Oh, my God.
Can you imagine?
This is coming out right after he spent all that time on the...
You, my nigga's that's not right
oh that dirty cogsucker hunter's laptop which he reportedly abandoned at a delaware shop in
april 2019 as you remember created a firestorm of controversy at least in the new york post
uh for his remember and then they shut down the story on big tech,
on social media, for his father during the 2020 election. Emails on the laptop's hard drive is
said to have shown that then-Vice President Biden held a meeting with a high-ranking official at
Burisma, the Ukrainian energy giant, which Hunter Biden previously served as a board member. Yet,
the president has denied any involvement in his son's business dealings,
despite the clear evidentiary contradictions.
Neither Biden nor Mazars have issued a statement
regarding the purported text message.
Oh yeah.
And again, Joe Biden was celebrating
the 100th anniversary of the Tulsa massacre.
So he's really, here's what he said at that.
Disgusting.
As I said in my address to the joint session of Congress, according to the intelligence
community, terrorism for white supremacy is the most lethal threat to the homeland today.
Not ISIS, not other a white supremacist.
That's not me.
That's the intelligence community
under both Trump
and under my administration.
All right, all right.
You're lying.
And you're a piece of shit.
He's lying.
What a dick.
That might be the most corrosive thing that an american president has
ever said remember the remember when he's running we're gonna we're gonna unify this country again
man i'm gonna bring it together man we can do it together these fucking white people 68 percent of
the country fucking hate black people What do you think of that?
People are fucking applauding.
Biggest lie out there.
And again, Joe, stop bringing
up specifics.
Okay? Or is that
classified?
Have you ever heard somebody
more bullish? And when he said, it's not me.
No, it's not you. It's fucking
Bernie, AOC, and
all the other puppeteers that are telling you what to say. But you're all Democrats. And again,
you're the party of slavery and Jim Crow. So suck a dick and die. Quit fucking lecturing us about
race. Colin Quinn had the greatest line on Tough Crowd about 20 years ago. Patrice was on. We're
arguing about race. And Colin goes, yeah, werice was on. We're arguing about raising Colin.
He goes, yeah, we're so racist.
We try to act like you.
We try to dance like you.
We try, you know, fuck it.
We talk like you.
Look at Hunter Biden.
Let's move on before I shit my pants.
Make me a sandwich.
Make me a fucking sandwich.
Oh, in our make me a sandwich segment tonight,
users on Twitter roasted Vice President Harris for passing out,
this is from a couple days ago, we didn't get to it yesterday,
passing out cookies made in her likeness to reporters on a plane
while traveling to meet with the president of Guatemala.
Cookies that look like her.
Bon appetit.
There you go.
Why is there no face on it?
Did she do that?
That looks like a penis, somebody, a downward penis on it.
Look at that.
The vice president traveled to the Central American country on Sunday to meet with Guatemalan President Alejandro G. Gematay in her first trip after being appointed by President Biden to lead diplomatic efforts in the region amid the border crisis.
And what an embarrassment the trip was, if you have any objectivity whatsoever.
She was greeted, we showed you, with signs, go home, mind your business.
In the tail section of Air Force Two, though,
Harris handed out cookies in her likeness,
made in the style of her official White House portrait.
You're fucking crazy.
She really is.
Gee, she's so far in overhead. And somebody made great point i think it was tucker carlson um do you remember she bombed in iowa she bombed in um
even california didn't want her to be the uh nominee after the debates her home state
and she's the fucking vice president one step away and when
you say that about vice president you're like you know but it really is true she is a cunt hair away
from being the president because this guy could kick it any day and she is so far in over her head
gop chairman rona mcdaniel by the way she's related to, you know who, Mitt Romney,
took a chop at Harris, saying the cookies were the modern-day equivalent of French Queen Marie Antoinette's famous quote,
let them eat cake.
Yeah, but these are cookies.
Harris is passing out cookies to the press with their face on them while the cartel makes
hundreds of millions of dollars smuggling drugs and children across the southern border.
This is from a guy named Rep, what is it, Guy Reschensthaler?
Reschensthaler.
This is all possible, he says, thanks to Biden-Harris administration's policies.
And it's hard to argue with that, my friend.
You are correct, sir.
Conservative commentator Matt Walsh called the cookies extremely disturbing behavior.
And Republican congressional candidate and former Clinton aide Buzz Patterson tweeted the level of narcissism, again, this
is from a Democrat, by Harris was uncharted.
The cookie crumbled even more online with the image quickly going viral.
One user wrote, fix that faceless Kamala Harris cookie.
And they put on the face, they typed in, anyone know where the border is?
Ha ha, zinger zinger.
Handing out cookies.
Holy, Obama didn't even do that.
Do you know Obama referred to himself in the first person
in like all of his speeches 12 times more
than every president combined?
Seriously, look it up. All of his speeches, 12 times more than every president combined. Seriously.
Look it up.
I made up the figure, but I know for a fact.
I, I, I.
I this, I that.
I'm surprised he didn't make a big chocolate cake shaped like a dick.
Oh, for the love of Christ.
It's crazy out here today, folks.
It's crazy. Let's move on.
No! No! No!
No!
Oh my God, a lot of delicious segments tonight.
In our FLA segment
tonight, Florida man
Are you sure it was Florida?
Accused of dragging pedestrian with
a car, hiding most of the body behind at a bait shop.
Boy, if that's not a Florida story, I don't know what is.
Joseph Charles Strickland, 28, seen here.
We had to cut off the top of his head because it was so filled with water.
Look at that hillbilly.
His eyes are within one inch of each other.
Look at that hillbilly. His eyes are within one inch of each other. Look at him.
You shit-kicking, stinky horseman who's smelling motherfucker, you.
It's my new favorite clip.
Joe Charles, director in 28 of Weeki Washi.
Oh, my God.
Poor Indians.
Weeki Washi was traveling on a road north of Tampa early Sunday
when his car struck the unidentified pedestrian, 32 years old, who was walking along the roadway,
according to the Florida Highway Patrol.
After the hit-and-run accident, they said the suspect traveled with the victim's remains
to the back of the Dixie Lee Bait Shop in Spring Hill.
Strickland removed the remains from his vehicle
and called his roommates, oh my God,
to help him push the car back to his home,
telling them he hit a deer.
He's like Henry Hill, remember?
Posing out the trunk.
What's that?
I hit a fucking skunk, Karen.
Told him he hit a deer.
And the roommate said,
how many deer wear khakis
in a fucking sweatshirt?
He hit a deer,
according to the FHP.
Oh, my God.
How brilliant is this guy?
God help him.
What a fucking idiot.
Once he arrived home, he allegedly spray painted over the damage
showered and then slept
can you imagine that's what you do like after you jerk off or have a nice meal showered and slept
the next morning strickland's roommate examined the vehicle and contacted law enforcement
because he didn't believe the car hit a deer.
Call him a detective, according to authorities.
Around the same time, a human leg was spotted on the side of the road.
Oh, my God.
I'm not crazy.
I just don't give a fuck.
Oh, my God.
I'm not crazy.
I just don't give a fuck.
Right near where the incident occurred, FHP said, you know,
obviously the guys who bots, as we like to say.
I'm not crazy.
I just don't give a fuck.
We heard you.
Strickland was arrested on charges that include leaving the scene of a crash involving a death,
tampering with evidence, and having no valid driver's license or insurance, and making up the worst excuse in the history of crime.
You're a real crumbum.
He also had a warrant for his arrest for bodily harm, gross negligence, felony criminal vehicle
operation in Minnesota.
Oh my God. The highway patrol said he rolled a car into a ditch last year as he tried to speed
away from a trooper. Strickland and two of his passengers suffered non-life-threatening injuries, and a third passenger was left in
critical condition.
I don't understand.
How is he still around?
I mean, I don't know.
Driving around without a license, you get warrants out, you're just a bad person.
Hiding people behind a bait shop.
That really gives it the Florida flavor, didn't it? That's why I had to do that story.
Fucking bait shop. While he was there, they said he bought a few lures.
The world has gone mad. More proof that political correctness is,
we're going to come up with another phrase.
That's too innocuous for something that's a real cancer of this country.
More proof in the headline for the next story,
homophobia barely exists, in my opinion.
Excuse me.
I blew a guy last night.
A Texas bakery lost business after announcing that it would be selling rainbow cookies for Pride Month,
only to become inundated with support over the controversy from across the United States.
So they lost a lot of business because we're so homophobic.
And then everybody across and I heard that and said, oh, the fags have it so, so tough.
Throwing your son looks like a fag to me.
Hey, hey, hey, that's a cookie.
Confections, that's the name of the place, which is located in Lufkin, said they had
received a wave of backlash after sharing a photo of the colorful cookies on Facebook.
Can I just put my two cents in since it's my fucking job?
It's not, I'm sure there's some homophobes, obviously.
Some people are religious and they're not hateful.
They just don't agree with it, okay?
Whatever.
They have a right to say they don't agree with it
without being labeled fucking hateful and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
But you know what my point is?
People are just sick of it.
We're sick of the rainbow.
You ruined the rainbow.
I can't even look at Skittles without getting queasy.
No, but I'm just saying people are sick of the PC horseshit.
Nobody gives a fuck anymore.
You were born gay. You say it.
So what are you celebrating?
I love pussy. Where's my parade?
Big float.
The labia was made out of 10,000 carnations.
It won the governor's trophy, Lesh.
But do you get my point?
People are just tired of it.
I guarantee that was half the emails.
Like, enough already.
Here's the store owners.
My heart is heavy.
One of the store owners said,
Oh, poor you. you honestly i never thought
a post that literally said more love less hate would result in this kind of backlash to a very
small business that is struggling to stay afloat and spread little cheer through the baked goods
that's not your job make delicious shit fine make the gay cookie, but then make, you know, the vagina cookies and the big penis cookies.
So if you love our cookies, we will have an overabundance of them tomorrow.
Hopefully tomorrow will be better, the Post continued.
The owners, their sisters, Dawn and Miranda, said that a large order,
look at cutie pies, give each other a little smooch.
I'll buy a whole dozen of them.
Said a large order for five dozen
cookies that was supposed to be picked up
the following day was also cancelled
with a very hateful
message. I bet you that one was from
Papu Cannon.
Or Mike Pence.
That was Mike Pence.
No, I'm kidding.
But when word of the incident spread,
they began to receive an outpouring of support
with a line of customers snaking around the corner on Friday.
Look at the virtue signalers.
Look at this.
I'm a good person.
I'm helping these people out.
You got it.
You're on national TV.
You made the internet.
There you go.
It just shows me how powerful and how many people buy into this pc horseshit we've sold out you know what i think it was a marketing ploy
we've sold out all this attention on our small business is very humbling
next month we're going to have a midget pride month.
In the 11 years we've been open, we've never seen anything quite like this, Don wrote on
Facebook.
Confections also received messages from across the nation, including from Mark Cuban's brother,
Brian, who said he wanted to buy cookies to donate to the LGBTQ charities and other non-profits
to show that he's a good person too.
I suck cock.
No, no, no.
And I love it. Yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy.
When things slow down, he said a bit, let us know if shipping is possible.
I'd like to support you, Cuban said.
If shipping isn't possible, I'll buy some by phone slash email, and you can donate my cookies to a local LGBT organization or children's charity. Just tell everybody on TV how good a person I am.
So really, the motto of the story was, it started out, look how homophobic a society,
and then by the end of it, guess what?
It dispelled it all.
They got more business than they can handle.
So next year on Pride Month, watch out and see if they do that again.
Nick, you're too cynical.
That's right, I am at this point.
Don't believe anything anybody fucking does.
Except for these broads.
They look too innocent.
I'm just saying.
You know what I'm saying.
Time for an Irish coffee.
I got a workout today.
I've said that two days in a row.
Took power naps in my sweats.
I go to bed too late.
Once again, quarter of three last night.
I'm sitting there watching YouTube torture flips.
Late at night, I get all ghoulish.
Looking at, you know, 10 most famous torture things.
And anyways, that's after watching two hockey games and the Red Sox.
And I speed through
those. Anyways, and I go to bed too late and open my eyes around 830. And that's like five hours.
That's really when you're 59. Then I wonder why I drink a pot of coffee in the morning.
By the time I get home from here, I crash from that. That's why starting tomorrow, cocaine along with my eggs.
Let's move on, folks.
This was an interesting one if you're a sports fan.
I don't think I've seen this happen.
I've seen a guy miss a base, but not on a home run try.
Pirates home run callback after bonehead play.
Pirates third baseman K. Brian Hayes went deep off Los Angeles Dodgers starter
Walker Buehler in the first inning of Tuesday night's game in Pittsburgh.
But the home run, get this everybody, was overturned after the Dodgers challenged it
because Hayes didn't touch first base.
I couldn't believe it when I read it.
Let's take a look, shall we?
Go to the videotape.
They're calling him out. I couldn't believe when I read it. Let's take a look, shall we? Go to the videotape.
They're calling him out.
That's unbelievable.
Oh, my God.
Holy Christ.
He missed it.
And you blew it.
You blew it.
Can I say something, though?
I'm actually going to defend the guy.
Do you know why he missed it?
He wasn't sure it was going to be a home run,
so he was actually busting down the line. When most people jog, he was actually running,
so he missed it for the right reason,
and apparently Lubrock's ghost was brought back for this game.
That's got to be relative, huh?
The guy missed first base. That's got to be relative, huh? The guy missed first base.
That's a bummer, huh?
The Dodgers were deemed correct,
and the umpire called the guy out.
The poor prick.
He's now on a bus back to Pawtucket.
Seriously, he got punished for hustling, but he missed it. Fair is fair.
Just stick my two cents in on, you know, tech and baseball and cameras and get rid of the home plate umps because it's impossible. These guys all throw a hundred now. They can't see whether it hit the corner or not.
Let's use our tech thing, okay?
But keep the up over there.
So we got to have our, you know,
when the guy slides into home and a big fucking argument,
have him run out and do the argument
on behalf of the machine.
I don't know what I'm saying.
That is it for today, ladies and gentlemen.
Again, please go to nickdip.com and contribute.
It's how we keep ourselves alive here.
It's not about me.
As you know, I'm loaded.
Right.
No, it's a free speech thing,
and we need as many people doing this on our side as we can get.
So nickdip.com.
Don't forget thecomicsgym.com.
And don't forget cameo.com.
If you want me to roast a friend of yours or a relative or say happy birthday,
I'll make a video on my phone and send it right to them.
Go to cameo.com.
Click on my profile. It explains how
to do it. That is it for today, ladies and gentlemen. Again, you guys think it, I will say
it. You're very welcome. We'll see you back here for, I can't believe, the final day of the week
tomorrow. Have a good day, everybody. guitar solo guitar solo