The Nick DiPaolo Show - Late Night Insurrection | Nick Di Paolo Show #1226

Episode Date: June 20, 2022

Colbert's production crew violates capitol rules. Conway on Biden's weakness. Lesbians make terroristic threat. Angry lefty. Angry Trannie. Maher defends Del Rio....

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 This guy whipped corn pops ass? 🎵 Oh yeah, how are you folks? Good to be back live. That's right, live. As you know, last week's shows we did ahead of time, but we're back live. Great to be back. I'd rather be doing this than laying home watching porn and drinking wine, right? Sure. We'll do it live. Okay.
Starting point is 00:01:14 We'll do it live! Fuck it! Do it live! I'll write it and we'll do it live! Fucking thing sucks! That's our printer. That's my dad yelling at our TV in 1968. Fucking thing sucks!
Starting point is 00:01:32 Anyways, what's going on? Did you have a great ‑‑ I don't know how to do this. I pretend I was live last week, so I got to pretend that I was here. How was your weekend? Anyhow, fucking Biden. Is he making it easy? Is it, it's like a movie. He's like fucking Arthur.
Starting point is 00:01:58 Uh-oh, retard alert. Retard alert. That's the secret service on the walkie-talkies when he lands. The retard has landed. Yes, that's his secret service nickname. Oh, what a jerk-off. Oh, and how about, I can't believe
Starting point is 00:02:18 that him put this into the show. Did you hear the latest? There's excerpts from his daughter's diary that they were looking for. Remember when they busted into Project Veritas, James O'Keefe's house, looking for it and shit? They sent the FBI. And first of all, everybody's like, first of all, even if it was a stolen diary, why would you send the FBI? What's in it that he's freaking the fuck out about? One of the excerpts, and I quote from the daughter, I can't even remember her name.
Starting point is 00:02:50 She had a lot of problems. She got like hyper-sexualized at a young age. She said, I used to, my father used to take me into the shower with him. I got to believe this is being talked about on TV right now. And she goes, looking back on it, probably inappropriate or whatever. And she sort of blames that for her being hyper-sexualized at a young age. So all these jokes we were making, I thought were a little over the top about him being creepy pedophile. Dallas, you got a daughter, you know? No, I can't even fucking fathom.
Starting point is 00:03:36 Have you ever heard of such a thing? It's not normal. It's not even close to normal. No, I've never. I showered my dad, but he said I had a nice ass. I'm not going to fucking argue with him. This was like in high school, you know. But, you know, but how creepy is that? I can't believe I forgot to even touch on that. Oh, my aching stem.
Starting point is 00:03:54 Yeah. And she sort of blames it on her. But the whole thing, he sends the FBI after a lost. It's fucking, this guy, it's creepy, man. Can't write a better script. can't you can't if this was trump he would have been if trump did all this horse shit he would have been impeached a month into his first year i mean this guy is a fucking a walking disaster and he's not just old for a president he's an. He's an old 78. He walks like a fucking old man like Tim Conway on Carol Benet. His hands are a little, and he can't even fucking ride a bike at this point.
Starting point is 00:04:35 You know, I don't even think he's going to make it to the goddamn midterm. And I don't mean politically. I mean without dying. Somebody put him on a Harley. Let him go. Put him on a fucking Harley. Put him on a highway with a few potholes. Do us a favor.
Starting point is 00:04:54 Make it look like an accident. Mother of God, help us, Lordy. So, yeah. He's taking a shower. What the fuck? It's almost as weird as this first story. Late night insurrection. Again, if this was about Biden, late night erection.
Starting point is 00:05:17 Oh, I'm sorry. Quick. You guys enjoy the food segments. I've been hearing this for 15 years. Colin Quinn said, why don't you do it? Because people have done it. Yes, I could be funny saying cunt while I'm making a grilled cheese.
Starting point is 00:05:30 I'm sure people are going to kick. But I made what they call a ragu ala Napolitano. And it's just an old-fashioned Sunday meat sauce. But I saw it I'm watching Stanley Tucci's show which you guys got to watch what's he call it tour of Italy I don't know
Starting point is 00:05:53 he went over to Italy and shot this I don't know how many part doc I watched the first season and it's fascinating I like him because he laughed so hard at me when we roasted Mario Batali and I was making fun of the fucking half of fags on the Food Network. Remember that guy, Alton Brown, Good Eats?
Starting point is 00:06:11 I said, yeah, Alton Brown's here. I go, his idea of Good Eats is a 10-year-old boy in a wet bathing suit. Fucking Tucci, who's a little swishy himself, but I like him. I don't know. No, he's got a beautiful wife, but whatever. You know, he's kind of a metro New York Italian. I don't know. No, he's got a beautiful wife, but whatever. He's kind of a metro New York Italian. But he was crying. He was sitting next to Emeril Lagasse, and everything that came out of my mouth was flooring him. I had some good ones. Mario Batali was sitting in a, they had him
Starting point is 00:06:39 sitting like a king, you know, a throne, that type of chair. And he had like a fake crown on. a king, you know, a throne, that type of chair. And he had like a fake crown on. And I go, look at you. You look like a 50-year-old lesbian celebrating her birthday alone at Burger King. Fucking Tucci was fucking doubled over. I should get him over your heads. Anyways, back to this.
Starting point is 00:07:01 I'm on a tangent. I don't know what I'm doing on Mondays. I can't even. Stephen Colbert produces and... Oh, what am I... Back to the... Anyways, yes, so that's it. And next picture is the final product over fresh papardelle. Look at that. It looks like something you pay 30 bucks in New York for. And it tastes like it. And look at this. Steam. Yes. There they are, mother. I'm talking to my mother. Listen.
Starting point is 00:07:28 I think I have to go pro with these. These have to be shared with the world. Listen to what I say at the end. Alrighty then. Enjoy your stale breaded Berkeley. Berkeley. Where you staying? Brookville?
Starting point is 00:07:43 Here's a son who cares. I still don't... What the fuck's the name? Brooksby. I still don't know. What the fuck's the name? Brooksby. Brooksby, I think. That's the name of the assisted living. It's beautiful. It's nicer than any condo.
Starting point is 00:07:53 You know. How about me? I don't even know the name of it. I go, enjoy your stale bread at what? Brookline? All right. That's enough. I'll give you guys a recipe, I guess.
Starting point is 00:08:03 I don't know. Just, yeah. It's on my phone. Fucking phenomenal. Six hours I cooked it. It has to be, there was a whole pork, a small one, like two pounds. I just cut it into chunks. Package of beef short ribs.
Starting point is 00:08:23 Flag steak that I kind of just cut thin, throw it in, a pack of Italian sausage, brown it all first, whole bottle of red wine, then four or five cans of tomatoes, one was puree, a small can of paste, and six, six hours. It was fucking phenomenal and it's gonna be even better. Look at you. You can tell I ate. All right. Let's get on with it. What is this? A fag show?
Starting point is 00:08:49 Stephen Colbert, speaking of fags. Boy, I don't like him. I used to pretend to try to say he's not a bad guy. Fuck his mother. Stephen Colbert produces and staffers arrested for trespassing at a house office building. A house, as in House of Representatives. House of Office building, haven't done any favors for Democrats stoking outrage over the January 6, 2021 U.S. Capitol riot,
Starting point is 00:09:12 which was not even a riot. Seven people working for the late show with Stephen Colbert were arrested and charged with unlawful entry after being caught unescorted at about 8.30 p.m. on Thursday by U.S. Capitol Police and the Longworth House office building. Did anybody get shot? No. By a black cop who was known to be a loose cannon? No. Anyways, the staff is reportedly allowed back into the Longworth building by an aide to rep Jake Atchenklaus. Atchenklaus? You are an idiot! Look at this guy from Massachusetts. Oh my God. I called him a pencil neck and guess who he's close with?
Starting point is 00:09:58 Please give me a call. Massachusetts. Democrat, according to Fox News, after being denied credentials for the select committee hearings and told by Capitol Police to leave. Jonathan Turley, seen here, this guy's a really smart teacher at George Washington University, law school professor said unlawful entry was the same charge that has been leveled against the vast majority of those arrested in the Capitol riot on January 6th. If the crew thought it better to ask forgiveness rather than permission in remaining, it was uniquely poor decision. Given the security rules after January 6th, Mr. Turley wrote on his blog, this could put some of these members in an awkward position. It is difficult to downplay such security breaches after the January riot.
Starting point is 00:10:45 Well, you'd think that would be the case. In a perfect world, it would be. But as you know and I know, these fuckers won't do a minute. You think these guys, again, break and entering, nobody was charged with insurrection, you know, on January 6th, number one. Number two, nobody had guns,
Starting point is 00:11:00 so I'm sick of hearing about it. Number three, you think these guys even do a minute in that D.C. jail? Bullshit. They'll all come out. Adam Schiff will come out and make an excuse. I invited him. Archencloss is probably licking his balls. The CBS team had previously conducted prearranged interviews with Mitch Archencloss, as well as Democratic reps Adam Pencilneff, Schiff of California. They have the same necks. It's hilarious. And Stephanie Murphy of Florida, both of whom sit on my face on January 6th. Sit on the January 6th panel. I stumbled over, Louis is promoting, you know, Louis' movie is coming out with Joe List and the thing I was in. It's, anyways, it's coming out. But he also released, he got back all his Louis shows from FX legally,
Starting point is 00:11:47 so he can sell them on his own website now, like exclusively, and he was promoting it with Bobby Kelly, and they showed my favorite scene in all the six seasons or however many Louis did, with this beautiful anchor woman doing the news, Louis laying there in bed, like eating ice cream, watching, you know? And she's like, and then the government, so-and-so, the senators will meet in the house to decide, blah, blah, blah. Senator so-and-so rubbed his shit on my big, fat, beautiful tits. She just reads it like it's part of the news. I'm not even doing it justice. He's like my big natural tits. And then some dude, anyways, I'm a child. The irony was not lost on Rep. Barry Laudermilk. How do you like your milk?
Starting point is 00:12:33 I like it louder. Georgia Republican who was singled out last week by the Select Committee for giving a tour to constituents the day before the rioting that included at least one person who marched on the Capitol. Some lawmakers had suggested it was a reconnaissance mission for the rioters, but Capitol Police said earlier this month that that was not the case. So that was another lie. While they are accusing me of giving illegal tours of the Capitol, they are giving illegal tours of the Capitol, Laura Monk said. Who's going to hold them accountable?
Starting point is 00:13:09 Exactly. You fucking hypocrite. Tell them, fella. The Capitol Police said, there's an active criminal investigation into the incident. Sure there is. And that there may be additional criminal charges. In a statement, CBS said that the production team was at
Starting point is 00:13:26 the Capitol on Wednesday and Thursday to film a comedy segment. Oh, they do comedy on Colbert now? For Colbert's show. Oh, God. Can you imagine watching that? Featuring Triumph, the insult comic dog. Who, by the way, that would be funny. Bob
Starting point is 00:13:42 Smigel, another communist. Their interviews at the Capitol were authorized and prearranged through congressional aides of the members' interview, the CBS statement said. After leaving the members' office on their last interview of the day, the production team stayed to film stand-up and other final comedy elements in the halls when they were detained by Capitol Police. You're lying. And you're a piece of shit. Yeah, I don't believe any of it.
Starting point is 00:14:07 So let's keep an eye on that and see exactly if they spend a minute. Whatever. I'll guarantee you shit will come out. There'll be some bullshit excuse. Probably Biden will go, hey, no, no, no. I don't know. probably Biden will go hey no no no I don't know
Starting point is 00:14:24 speaking of Biden not much of a boss even some of the people well you know the Dems want him out now he's just a fucking train wreck but Kellyanne Conway who I actually told you I always brag about this but I used to sit next to her
Starting point is 00:14:40 in that streaming show on Fox whatever it was called her name was Fitzpatrick back then. And I'm thinking, who's this washed out old lady? Remember? Next thing you know, she's calling shots in the Trump organization. Kellyanne Conway, who served as special counselor, counselor to former President Donald Trump, said when she worked in his administration, nobody ever had to ask who's in charge.
Starting point is 00:15:06 She said that on some show. We have the audio. Putin didn't invade Ukraine. And we should care about what happens in Ukraine. We should care about a sovereign nation being invaded. And I will tell you this. Whatever people think about Donald Trump, with the white house i worked and nobody ever had to ask what is the vice president doing the vice president smart capable and no one
Starting point is 00:15:31 ever had to ask who's actually the president who's in charge yeah exactly who's in charge they showed a clip of trump remember when he went to some all the heads of state were there on some g8 summit i don't know what the fuck it was economic summit but all the heads of state were there. Some G8 summit. I don't know what the fuck it was. Economic summit. But all the leaders of all the countries there that were there, the eight countries. And they come out and somehow somebody got in front of Trump. He literally goes like this to the guy. Pushes him out of the way and steps.
Starting point is 00:16:00 America first. Literally. Imagine. True alpha male at work. Yes. Literally. Imagine. True alpha male at work. Yes. Yes. And America first. I mean, Biden would have let people, you know, walk up.
Starting point is 00:16:13 Conway pointed out that authoritarian regimes are on the rise in China, North Korea, Iran, and Russia. How about the United States, Kelly? And claimed that President Putin wouldn't have invaded Ukraine if Trump was in the White House. I agree with that. Try it. Hey, Putin, try it. Heard you got cancer. Hope it spreads to your clit. To your clit. There was a certain fear, if not respect, around the globe for America-first policies. That's right. We'd make the other people shake in their goddamn boots, wouldn't we?
Starting point is 00:16:48 Oh, boy. Who's your fucking boss, huh? Who's your fucking boss? That guy right there. Yes, sir. We told India and China we're out of the Paris Climate Accord because we are done paying for you to pollute the world. We are missing that strength and leadership right now, Conway said.
Starting point is 00:17:06 Her comments come amid reports that the Biden White House is adrift and experienced managerial meltdowns that could lead to a staff shakeup at the president's poll numbers. Continue to take a real nosedive. The disorder in the West Wing is also evident in White House aides having to walk back comments Biden has made publicly about the U.S. stance toward Taiwan and Putin's invasion of Ukraine. He just goes out on TV and blabbers and they go, they're watching it. You know, they're watching him going,
Starting point is 00:17:43 Will you shut up? Will you? Will you please shut up? Clean up. I owe Biden. Somebody just crashed their bike into a dozen eggs. Anyways, let's move on to the angry dykes. How's that for a segue? That's what Biden is.
Starting point is 00:18:02 He's such a pussy and he's very angry. He's just an angry old fucking man. Angry dykes encourage violence. Nick, should you use that? Yes. Dykes, twats, never liked them. I like the pretty ones again. Who doesn't? Nothing prettier than two girls having lunch on each other. Am I right? Are the kids watching? The radical pro-abortion group Jane's Revenge, I used to be in that. I played bass. and let me tell you something about those dirty whores, is planning more acts of domestic terrorism when the United States Supreme Court's decision on Roe versus Twasson Wade is revealed, dubbed a night of rage, an autonomous call to action against patriarchal supremacy. We get right to it, don't we? Once again, radical feminists, the patriarchy. It's not even about abortion. I've been saying this for a million years. It's about, they say, we don't want men telling us what to do with our body. You don't mind it when I'm in
Starting point is 00:18:56 the sack and I say, fucking bend over that tub, you fucker. Well, that wouldn't be the sack. Okay, the bathroom with the mario. Anyway, look at that. My vagina's angry. Sure is. Looks like. It is. It's pissed off. I can tell.
Starting point is 00:19:12 It's spitting some type of. The group posted its plans on the anarchist library website at the end of May in expectation of the ruling expected sometime in June. In other news, Senator Warren rubbed shit on my big natural tits. Dude, I'm going to show you after the show, you're going to cry. Here are some excerpts from the manifesto. This is an event that should inspire rage in millions of people who can get pregnant. You know, see how even the language has changed.
Starting point is 00:19:49 They have to say people who can get pregnant. And yet the response thus far has been tepid. Now, why do you think that is, you angry, angry bitch? Why do you think it's tepid? Nobody believes what you're sputing, other than the women that look like you, which is, you know, like I said, they look like pulling guards for the cowboys. We have agonized over this apparent absence of indignation. They're mad that people aren't indignant. They're indignant. Why is it that we are so afraid to unleash hell upon those who are destroying us? Do you see?
Starting point is 00:20:16 This is a perfect example of the media for the last 40 years pointing to people like you and I on the right and calling us, they called Reagan Hitler. They label you, and now Biden labels you as a terrorist, as Hitler. I know I'm not the first person to make this point, but what does that, that means, obviously, if you wanted to kill Hitler, nobody would have a problem with it, or terrorists. And they got people believing that's what you are. So it's all right to commit commit violence. Again it's a bunch of muff divers so I'm not really that scared. To unleash hell upon those who are destroying us. It's a sick question you're a sick fuck and I'm not
Starting point is 00:20:56 that sick that I'm gonna answer it. It says destroying us. That would have worked better. Fear of state repression is valid, but this goes deeper than that. Whatever from your fury, listen to this, listen to this angry bitch. Whatever form your fury takes, the first step is feeling it.
Starting point is 00:21:14 The next step is carrying that anger out into the world. These broads have been doing that since they were born, since nobody finger popped them in fucking junior high. They got a real hate on it. Into the world and expressing it physically. Also, I don't like nobody touching me.
Starting point is 00:21:33 Any of you homos touch me. That's Diane. And I'll kill you. Consider this your call to action. On the night, by the way, feminist groups are just like BLM. They're Marxist groups.
Starting point is 00:21:48 Don't let them fucking fool you with we just want to be accepted, blah, blah, blah. Don't buy any of that shit. They bring with them a whole truckload of Marxist fucking beliefs. On the night the final ruling is issued, a specific date we cannot yet predict, but we know is arriving imminently. We are asking for courageous hearts to come out after dark. Do it during the day, you fucking pussies. Whoever you are and wherever you are,
Starting point is 00:22:15 we are asking for you to do what you can to make your anger known. Well, where are the cops? Don't you move, you motherfucker. I'll blow your brains out. We have selected a time of 8 p.m. Are you writing this down, folks? At 8 p.m., you're going to look out your window. Was it today?
Starting point is 00:22:34 I don't even know what the fucking, whatever it is. You're going to see a bunch of women that look like Grandpa from the Munsters. Those are the hot ones. We have selected a time of 8 p.m for actions nationwide to begin i can't wait to see what happens but know that this is a general guideline there may be other considerations involved in planning time and place we do not claim to speak for every community or crew we are simply calling out to you and we hope uh your answer you guys answer our cries crews they use you know they use use gangbanger.
Starting point is 00:23:06 Yo, my crew's acting up. The manifesto says that if there are any cis male, listen, listen to how deep the hatred runs for men. If there are any cis male allies who want to take part, okay, but do not police us. Do not tell us what is and isn't appropriate. Fuck you! Fuck you! What isn't appropriate. Fuck you! Fuck you! What a hateful... Fuck you! We'll take your help, because after all, physically you're superior to us.
Starting point is 00:23:36 And mentally. And mentally, actually. We'll take your help. But don't try to tell us. Tell you what. Sad part is, there'll be cis males. Well, they call them cis males. But there'll be soy boys who, you know, the first thing they tell a chick is, oh, I'm a feminist. And then they, you know, rape them a week later. Because the manifesto concludes, to those who work, this is a quote, to oppress us, if abortion isn't safe, you aren't either. We are everywhere.
Starting point is 00:24:06 Sounds like a terrorist threat to me. Exactly. Fucking exactly. That's not domestic terrorism, though. Let me tell you, Merrick Garland, you fucking ballers. More than 100 Republicans have signed a letter asking
Starting point is 00:24:22 Attorney General Merrick Garland to instruct the Department of Justice to investigate this group in relation to attacks on pro-life pregnancy centers across the country as domestic terrorists. Yeah, they attacked pro-life places. And this guy, nowhere to be found. He said, yeah, I'll get right on it. I'd say play golf, but he doesn't, yeah, I'll get right on it. I'd say he played golf, but he doesn't. Yeah, I'll get right on it. Did you say it was, who was it?
Starting point is 00:24:52 Oh, feminist group. Yeah, I'll get right on it. Anyways, folks, today's episode of the Nick DiPaolo Show brought to you by one of our favorite sponsors, Black Buffalo, folks. Smokeless tobacco. There are alternatives for everything these days. Even meat. You don't believe it. Go into an adult toy store. But where are the high-quality tobacco alternatives? There really aren't
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Starting point is 00:26:40 contains nicotine. Nicotine is an addictive chemical, but it's actually a good product. You know, not everything we get here is, but that one is. Hey, everybody. Let's move on, I guess. Make me a sandwich. Make me a fucking
Starting point is 00:27:00 sandwich. Didn't they already make you a sauce today? Oh! Hey. In our shut up and make me a sandwich. Didn't they already make you a sauce today? Oh! Hey. In our shut up and make me a sandwich segment tonight, let's take a look at... 98 fucking
Starting point is 00:27:16 dollars! Hold on. No, that's fine. I want you to check this out, ladies and gentlemen. I'm just going to comment on it because I spilled over it. I found it. She she sums up to me the women on the far left. Again, there's plenty of Democrat women who aren't nuts like this. But if this broad, first of all, you know, she hates men. I have never, when you talk about women on the far left, like real hardcore feminists, they're shrill, they're angry, which is all Hillary was,
Starting point is 00:27:46 a toned-down version. But this scares me because look what the media, and the media's responsible. Check out what the media can do to some people when they choose sides and just believe everything they hear on CNN. Check out this witch who I would, I could
Starting point is 00:28:01 open her head with an axe tonight and sleep like a lamb. Go ahead. ...to decide between buying gas or buying food. And guess who wins? Because I have to get to the job that I need to fucking buy anything at all. That doesn't pay me enough. And people want to donate $1,000 to fucking cats. $98 goddamn dollars at Costco to fill up fucking cats! $98 goddamn dollars! At Costco!
Starting point is 00:28:26 To fill up my tank! $98! $5.50 a tank! $5.50 a gallon! At Costco! $5.50 a gallon at Costco! You're a whore! This is the work of the fucking religious right!
Starting point is 00:28:44 Listen to Robert Reich, who clearly... who gives us all of the evidence. All of the evidence about how our poverty is a choice that our government made for us. A CEO is not worth 351 times what I get paid. No, 751, you fucking bug. times what I get paid. No, 751, you fucking bug. Fuck you, religious right, who are doing this
Starting point is 00:29:12 and have been doing this to us. Fuck you, profiteering companies. Fuck you, billionaires, stealing us, breaking our backs, stealing from us, profiteering off of us. Unbelievable. Do you hear that? There's only one response this deserves.
Starting point is 00:29:27 You fucking whore. Yeah, that's it. Go home. Get my dinner ready. Oh, maybe a second response. You are a cunt, cunt, cunt, cunt. A big fat sneaky cunt. Said and true, but they'll tell you you're a motherfucking cunt.
Starting point is 00:29:43 You are a cunt, cunt, cunt, cunt, motherfucking cunt. Everybody knows from the head to the toes you're a big, fat, stinking cunt. Do you see that, though? That's what happens. All those, she actually mentioned Robert Reich, just telling you where she gets her beliefs. And no, I'm not half that right wing. What an angry, shrill, can you imagine hanging out with that?
Starting point is 00:30:14 She must be the life of the party. Don't you want to bat? let's stay on the uh the gay persuasion proud of what is the headline and it just says nick commentary what do we got a clip here nothing no it's a picture of a tweet. Oh, okay. There it is. There you go, folks. Check this out. This is from Admiral Rachel Levine, you know, the first trans. Funny thing is, if she slash he slash they slash fuckface combed his hair like a guy, it would be a guy, right?
Starting point is 00:31:06 But she leaves that on purpose to let you know. She leaves the, you know the old lady with Tweety Bird hair? And next to, by the way, I didn't know this little raghead, she's gay too, by the way, openly gay and black, because that's what's important. And this admiral puts up, when the first openly gay press secretary, the first openly trans, whatever, four-star admiral meet at the White House during pride, proud to be a part of an administration where everyone can see themselves reflected in leadership. We've come so far. Here's to shattering more ceilings. I hope a piece of shard of glass from that ceiling goes right into the top of your bun.
Starting point is 00:31:46 Cut your jug look, you. See that? That's what it's about. Never mind you suck at what you do. This poor black girl, she looks nice enough to hang out with, even though, fuck her, she hates me because I'm white and straight. But have you seen her? We made fun of Jen Psaki.
Starting point is 00:32:04 This girl can't. She has to look down at her notes and doesn't know what she's doing. Again, lowering the standards out of fairness. That's what it's about. It's about identity. He goes, we've come a long way. No, you're regressing. Because racists back then, all they gave a fuck
Starting point is 00:32:17 was about skin color. That's why they wouldn't give a black person a job. That's where you guys are now. Gender, skin color, you're going backwards and you call yourself progressive. Nice flag too, by the way. Can't even eat Lucky Charms anymore. God damn these people. God damn it. Ah, the my shot. Give me back my shot. My shot. Oh, God help us. Isn't that true, though?
Starting point is 00:32:51 They're going backwards. This is what's important. You don't have to. I love this mentality. You have to. A government has to reflect. What a crock of shit. Again, that's a smoke screen.
Starting point is 00:33:04 Because otherwise, you know what? Whitey would be running the ship from now to the end of time. Again, that's a smoke screen. Because otherwise, you know what? Whitey would be running the ship from now to the end of time. Sorry, I said it. Sue me. Fucking cancel me. You can't. I'm like Kid Rock. I'm beholden to nobody.
Starting point is 00:33:16 Except the wife. Let's move on, folks, to another lefty who's finally coming around. I'm not going to give him credit uh i mean i give him credit where look he represents his side well billy marr i know you hate him i hate him um you know because he's pompous asshole and he's been it's guys like this who are coming around now i really want to say you realize you've been wrong for almost 25 30 years just come out and admit it and then you can do whatever you want. Bill Maher wasn't impressed with Washington Redskins. I'm going to say Redskins.
Starting point is 00:33:50 Tip to you Redskin fans, don't say Commanders. Make your own T-shirts with a Redskin on it, or print up the old ones. Keep saying Redskins, and you got the Redskins back. The only difference is a copyright. They made a Commander, but if you don't adhere to that, just keep calling them Redskins back. The only difference is a copyright. They made a commander. But if you don't adhere to that, just keep calling them Redskins. What, are you going to get attacked by a bunch of Cherokees on the way to the supermarket?
Starting point is 00:34:13 Washington Redskins head coach Ron Rivera, who I used to respect, he fined Jack Del Rio, the defensive coordinator of the Washington Redskins, was fined $100,000 after he referred to the January 6th riot at the Capitol as a dust-up. I've seen worse dust-ups. I've seen fights called the dust-up that were more violent than... I'll say it again, folks. Nobody was charged with insurrection, and nobody had a gun except the black cop who killed the white Trump supporter. Okay? So here's Del Rio.
Starting point is 00:34:49 We showed this before, but just to refresh your memory. A simple question. Why are we not looking into those things? If we're going to talk about it, why are we not looking into those things? Because it's kind of hard for me to say. Talk about the riots. I can realistically look at it. I see the images on TV. People's livelihoods are being destroyed.
Starting point is 00:35:12 Businesses are being burned down. No problem. And then we have a dust-up at the Capitol. Nothing burned down. And we're not going to talk about it. We're going to make that a major deal. I just think it kind of two standards and if we apply the same standard and we're going to be reasonable with
Starting point is 00:35:30 each other let's have a discussion that's all it was let's have a discussion we're americans just talk it through i'm for i'm for us you know having a great opportunity to have a fulfilled life. All right. All right. And then his head coach, who just beat cancer, by the way, has to show his true brown colors. I just want to be honest. I mean, you guys are throwing the words around white terrorists and, like, I'm not fucking, I'll just throw around black and brown crime and
Starting point is 00:36:05 lump it all in since you guys do. Rivera tweets this. No, I can see it. This morning I met with Coach Delry to express how disappointed I am in his comments on Wednesday. His comments do not reflect the organization's view
Starting point is 00:36:23 and are extremely hurtful to our great community here and the DMV. What? Is that where he's working? As we saw last night in the hearings, what happened on the Capitol on January 6, 2020 was an act of domestic terrorism. A group of citizens attempted to overturn
Starting point is 00:36:38 the results of a free and fair election. Yeah, it was free and fair. And as a result, lives were lost and the Capitol building was damaged. Lives were lost? There's a lie. Why? Oh, I'm sorry. A couple of Capitol peace had heart attacks.
Starting point is 00:36:52 Bring it back up. I'm not done. I'm reading the whole thing. Coach Del Rio apologized for his comments on Wednesday. He understands the distinction between the events of that dark day and peaceful protests, which are a hallmark of democracy. Yeah, I understand the difference too. The riots were an actual threat. People died, burned down billions of dollars worth
Starting point is 00:37:11 of buildings. That's called terrorism, you dumb fuck, Ron Rivera. God. He does have the right to voice his opinion as a citizen of the United States. It most certainly is his constitutional right to do so. However, words have consequences, and his words hurt a lot of people and other light in our community. I want to make it clear, by the way, our community, he means the brown, black community. I want to make it clear that our organization will not tolerate any equivalency between those who demanded justice in the wake of George Floyd's murder and the actions of those on general Heath I can't even it's so dumb I can't even after reflecting on the situation and circumstances I have decided to find coach del Rio a hundred thousand dollars which is the team will donate to the United States Capitol Police Memorial Fund. Speaking of terrorism.
Starting point is 00:38:08 Anyways. Memorial Fund. I feel strongly that after our conversation this morning, he will have a greater understanding for the impact of his language and the values that our teams stand for. I don't like your jerk-off name. You got a picture of him or no? I don't like your jerk-off face.
Starting point is 00:38:31 I don't like your jerk-off behavior. And I don't like you, jerk-off. Fucking asshole. Oh, that dirty cocksucker. Here's Bill Maher sort of defending Jack Del Rio. Let's listen to this real quick. He has a right to be wrong. Yes.
Starting point is 00:38:50 In America, you have the right to be wrong. Here's Bill. This is the arrogance of the left. Well, he has a right to think he's wrong, too, I guess. But even when he's trying to say, even when he's plugging free speech, because don't forget, it's the left that shuts down free speech, not the fucking right. So even when he's defending, he has to throw in, this guy's full of shit. He's crazy, but he has to write the, and he's not.
Starting point is 00:39:15 He's right. Bill, he's right a thousand percent. How the fuck can you look at something called an insurrection when nobody had weapons can you look at something called an insurrection where nobody had weapons and one woman gets shot by a cop, like I said, how can you look at that? Well, because democracy itself was under threat. No, the fuck it wasn't. They didn't have weapons. They didn't burn anything down. How fucking dare you say he was wrong? Come on, Billy. Go ahead. say he was wrong. Come on, Billy. Go ahead. Find him. The team fined him $100,000 for this opinion. Finding people for an opinion. I am not down with that. And here's what the...
Starting point is 00:39:57 He's not down with that. He is not down with that. I don't like your jerk-off name. Oh, take it easy. I don't like your jerk-off face. I don't like you jerk-off anyhow he's not down with that finally coming around but again bill you helped build this shit hole your politics for 25 years that very popular show very influential on the left you helped crush free speech I'm glad you're on board now I guess but Jack Del Rio was fucking right on top of it. That's it for today, ladies and gentlemen. What a day to come back. And I'll tell you, weather's been beautiful in the high hundreds, 400% humidity. Fucking balls are stuck to my ankles. It used to be knees. That's it. Don't forget to sign up
Starting point is 00:40:44 monthly. Could you sign up monthly please? Make it a little easier for us. I'm still selling coke and weed. Thecomicsgym.com comicsgym.com. Sign up at patreon.com. You can go to nickdip.com and also don't forget
Starting point is 00:41:01 cameo.com. Just did one before the show. guy's birthday. If you want me to roast a friend or relative, go to Cameo.com. Click on it. They'll tell you how to do it. I'll be glad to verbally rip somebody to shreds. It's so much fun. That's it.
Starting point is 00:41:17 You guys think that I'll say it? You're very welcome. We'll see you back here at the same time tomorrow. Have a good rest of the day, everybody. guitar solo Thanks for watching!

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