The Nick DiPaolo Show - Mass Shootings En Masse | Nick Di Paolo Show #1218
Episode Date: June 6, 2022Gascon loves criminals. Bill Maher's wake up continues. The City of Brotherly Hate. Gunman kills judge. Children at drag show. Panthers first trans cheerleader....
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Hey guys, I want to thank you for watching and contributing to the show.
Every day I read something about a comedian or a comedy producer that supports censorship.
Fuck these people.
Patton Oswalt.
Comedy is meant to be uncensored.
Nothing is off limits and if the truth hurts your feelings, then too bad.
Change the station.
Don't tell anyone else what they can or can't say.
That's why I created this show,
a place to find unfiltered and brutally honest comedy.
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the media running libs would never put this show out there,
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me and my team,
along with your support and contributions.
To that end,
please consider contributing to the show to keep us going.
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You fuel the show, and I appreciate all your generosity.
We can't do it without you. Snap, bitches.
Welcome to the drag show.
Yes.
Yes.
Snap, bitches. Welcome to the drag show.
Yes!
I actually have to fight through the stories to find one that doesn't involve LGBT.
You can't tell me this agenda hasn't been jammed up our asses, down our throats, backwards, sideways.
I don't get it.
I guess they decided that in race is what divides us the best.
I don't know.
Find something else, will you?
The queers don't even bother me.
But if I had kids and they would take them to a dance,
I'd have a problem with it.
Where are you parents anyways?
Why don't I read more stories about straight parents that had their cut, their teacher teaching their, you know,
seven-year-old boy about penises.
Why don't you fucking go to the school and string them up?
You know, like back in the 1850s.
I don't see enough revenge out there,
not vengeance enough, you know, that type of shit.
Nick, what are you saying?
I have no idea.
It's Monday.
I don't want to fucking be here. Sure, it's an easy job. I don't give a fuck. What'd I do? Nothing. Went to Skidaway fucking park, state park or whatever. Trails and shit.
minutes. I said, what the fuck? Get off the couch, you get poison ivy, honey, let's go home.
Meanwhile, Dallas shows me pictures of him and his girlfriend dressed like a roaring 20s,
fucking dancing. I mean, literally, I said, you show my wife that, you're fired.
Fucking, if she sees one minute of that, I'm fucked. She would love to be doing that shit. Probably going to hear it now. I don't think she watches the show.
I mean, him and his girlfriend dress up like it's the 20s.
They look fucking great.
His girlfriend's parents, Gianna, come into town.
They're fucking dancing the night away.
My mother comes down here.
You know what she's going to do?
Sit on the couch next to me.
Fucking watch Three Stooges Marathon.
That's all I'm doing.
What a good boyfriend.
I can't wait until that burns off and you're tired of her.
You know what?
Who said?
What else?
Real quick.
Sports rap.
Sox have kicked in the most runs in baseball.
Or American League at least,
leading the league in runs.
I think all of baseball.
Hitting the shit out of the ball.
They've won 16 out of 17 out of 24 or whatever,
and they haven't budged.
The Yankees are just smoking people.
And, I mean, the Sox are killing it offensively, just what we expected,
and they swept Oakland, which is no biggie.
Now they're going to – here's the surprise thing, folks.
Man, am I heavy.
You can tell I ate like a fucking animal.
I got to stop.
Hey, folks, I haven't had a cigarette in,
when did I get home from Fuckface Island?
When did I get home from the wedding?
Tuesday.
Tuesday?
Yeah.
So almost a week tomorrow.
I mean, I'm looking at them right there.
My wife has them out with you.
I'm like, fuck that.
COVID's enough for my lungs.
As soon as that clears up, they'll watch out.
What was I talking about?
Sports.
Red Sox.
Where else has it gone?
Celtics steal game one with an unbelievable comeback
and then get smoked last night.
Of course, I do what I always do.
It's a basketball game.
I record it and I fast forward to the end of the third quarter,
maybe the middle of the fourth,
because that's when it's all decided.
By then it was already decided.
So you guys are going to tell me I should sit there and watch them
exchange baskets for two hours.
Please. NHL hockey literally gives me a fucking hard-on these guys think it still matters they're flying up in the fucking rocking each other teeth coming
out stitches fucking goalies making saves like you've never anyways what's
going on in the scumbag country of ours can somebody put this president asleep
please that wasn't a johnny depp statement i'm just saying put him asleep make him sit down
uh what's the headline oh i started with this i almost forgot about it i started at the beginning
of the weekend scumbag george gascon i I believe he's Hispanic. Please tell me he's not
Italian because he's got a real hate on for this country and white people. Should hang. What? Well,
that's what I wrote. Excuse me. That might be the pizza and a half I made. A furious L.A. mom who
was mowed down with her baby by a hit-and-run teen driver
has lashed out at soft-on-crime district attorney George Gascon
after the perp was given, get this, just five months probation
after running down a woman with a baby in just five bucks.
And she's furious about this.
You're out of order.
You're out of order.
That's him.
The whole trial is out of order. You're out of order. That's him. The whole trial is out of order.
They're out of order.
The mother only identified as Rachel.
Boy, when I think Rachel, I think Jennifer Aniston.
Dirty panties.
I just like, what?
Hello?
Hello.
What are we doing?
Oh, the show.
Hello.
Hello.
Hello. What are we doing? Oh, the show. Hello.
The mother only identified as Rachel took aim at L.A.'s top prosecutor in a scathing victim impact.
I love it. She actually sounds eloquent.
There's three people left in California that could actually perform a sentence.
Scathing victim impact statement after the 16-year-old driver was ordered to participate in a diversionary program over the august 2021 incident foggis news foggis news foggis fox news reported for george gascon doesn't this is the mother talking i'm going to
show you the clip at the end because you'll be in shock you won't even hear what i'm saying
george gascon doesn't value my life or the life of my child or any other victim out there
and would rather reward
the monsters like the juvenile suspect by demonstrating to them that their actions have
no consequences, Rachel wrote. And then D.A. Gascones, she says, is telling him and every
other thug in L.A. County that it doesn't matter if you try to murder people. She's so right.
You're a real crumbum.
Why are Gascon's policies prioritizing
the livelihood of rotten monsters
when my child, my baby,
who's incapable of protecting himself,
is left to fend for himself
and is essentially being told his life doesn't matter?
Exactly right.
Exactly right.
It's an all-out war against the middle class white people whatever
you want to fucking call it okay these radical leftists hate you don't ever forget that
this fucker should be i can't believe nobody's taking him out
but you know why they're out because the fuck and then you take him out you have to deal with
the latin kings and, they love him.
They're getting tattoos of him literally in prison on there.
Shocking surveillance video of the incident showed the teen plowing directly into Rachel
as she pushed her eight-month-old son in a stroller down a Venice street the morning of August 6th.
I know that.
I've lived in Venice.
That's about as pretty as it gets.
What an asswipe of a city.
I mean, the ocean's right there, but that's covered with freaks and fucking.
It was nice in 1966, you know.
But I couldn't believe when I saw this and how I forgot to almost put it into the show.
Watch this.
In Venice, you see the woman pushing a stroller, then a car drives straight into them,
while sending them both flying into the air.
Can we see that again?
It's shocking.
This is the mother of the year for me.
She saves that baby's life.
Watch her lift the carriage.
How about she gets right up?
I don't know if she's in shock right there
but her instincts are to go right for the child she lifted that stroller and turned it just in
time she's a fucking hero gas gonna be hung up by his balls fucking scumbag who do you think
gives the kid five what because he's 16's 16? Who gives it? He was on drugs, by the way.
The teen was charged with littering and loitering.
Two felony counts of assault by means of force,
likely to produce great bodily injury.
Sounds like attempted murder.
Is that what you're trying to say?
Great bodily injury in one felony count of hit and run according to the da's office and that gets
you a fucking a few months in a alternative school detention rachel who wasn't seriously
injured referred to the attack as exactly attempted murder and criticized gascon for
continuing to treat juveniles with the lightest touch possible she says i have never been more
surprised or disappointed and in fact i have never felt so victimized as i i like to know how she
voted if she if she you know i you're living in venice you're not a fucking republican okay
but nothing justifies this uh by the system and current policies of LA's DA, George Gascon. She said, yeah, well, okay.
Just the facts, ma'am.
Look at that.
I couldn't believe how she popped right up.
I got hit by a car when I was 10 or 11.
I got hit from behind, didn't know I got hit.
I woke up in the middle of the street.
Did I ever tell you that, though?
Yeah.
Yeah, I woke up in the middle of the street.
I had to look over.
My bike is this big.
It's crunched.
I'm laying on a yellow line, and there's women over me.
Two of them have veils on because they were at a wedding across the street.
Creepy.
Is that not creepy?
Yeah, that's creepy.
And my buddy, Kevin Gaffney, happened to see the whole thing out his window.
Did a flip, broke the windshield, my head.
Car skid
like 80 feet, I rolled off the hood. Should have been dead. Why wasn't I? I was
riding a bike that was missing the seat. Don't make no gay jokes. It fell off the
day before. I didn't put it back on. I was just pedaling to the store to get some,
you know, ice cream or some shit. I remember crossing the street, looking both ways, and then waking up.
But,
and again, in Gascon's world,
he would have
started dating the woman that hit me, because she
actually had a joint in her car, and she was all fucking
high, just like that jerk.
Anyways, is that not unbelievable?
Unbelievable.
That's just par for the course.
I don't know where we're headed man i can't wait
no go ahead you're good
in our libs eating libs segment tonight ladies and gentlemen
one figure on the left is literally trying to cancel bill maher let me guess fag
after the hbo late night host who's coming to his senses after 25 years of misinformation and pot
smoke uh late night host monologue last week uh that poked fun at the lgbt community
no wonder why you guys get picked on.
You really are pussies, even as adults.
Anyways, Advocate Magazine published a piece on Wednesday.
Nice name for magazine.
I'd wipe my ass with it from today.
Wednesday headline, Bill Maher has gone too far with anti-LGBTQ,
S-O-M-N-O-P-K-R-S, motherfucking Z up in the motherfucker.
LGBT comments with a subhead declaring David Kilnick of the LGBTQ Network.
Oh, God, I didn't know that was available in my area.
Says Mars HBO show real time with Bill Maher should be canceled after the remote.
Is that what you think, David?
You fucking cat
say jack motherfucker.
Will you shut up? Shut up! Shut up!
That's right, I'm laughing at you.
Should be
canceled.
You're a little fascist
fucking jerk-off. I can't believe we take so much shit
from the gobblers of goo. Kilnick wrote, he has spent, he's talking about Mara, he has spent over
three decades fighting, no, he's talking about himself, he has spent over three decades fighting
for the rights of our LGBTQ plus communities, particularly safe
spaces for our youth. I don't even know what that means. It's all made up. It's just, yeah,
they get picked. Gay people get picked on. So did fucking white kids at black schools.
So did girls get picked on by fucking bigger girls. So did whatever the fuck. Only one type of person couldn't get over it as an adult.
Space is for our youth,
but recent jokes by the progressive comedian
feel like 1993 all over again.
So does your haircut, you stinky fuckwad.
Last week, HBO's Real Time with Bill Mayer,
namesake, closed his show by tackling what he described as the LG, do I have to keep
fucking reading those letters, the fag community, the ball-licking perennium Yemen trend, he said,
has become very prevalent among young Americans. If something about the human race is changing,
this is Bill Martok, and he makes a great point, by the way. Good to see him coming out of his
90-year fog. Human race is changing
at a previously unprecedented rate.
We at least have to discuss it,
Mara began his monologue.
Broken down over time, the LGBT
population of America seems
to be roughly doubling every
generation, which is right.
I'm thinking about sucking a dick at this point.
It seems like everybody's getting it on the front. It's like the
hula hoop.
Mar then cited a
Gallup poll that indicated
listen to these numbers, okay? This is
where the party of science
can't handle the party of science.
Less than 1% have another
donut, Nick. 1% of Americans
born before 1946 that's Joe Biden's generation, identify that way, meaning gay.
2.6% of boomers do.
4.2% of Gen X, 10.5% of millennials, and 20.8% of Gen Z identify as LGBT.
If we follow the trajectory, we'll all be gay in 2054.
Am I killing it?
I'm just saying,
he says, that when things change this much
this fast, people are allowed
to ask, what's up with that, Maher said.
Which is a great point. Maher also
cited, I don't know why I weren't asking it a few
years ago when I was in fifth grade.
Nineteen fucking
seventy-72.
Maher also cited reports about children
whose transitions have hindered
their bone density development and fertility.
This isn't just a lifestyle decision.
It's a medical one, he said.
Weighing trade-offs is not bigotry.
Yes, sir.
Did I show the...
Oh, here it comes.
He has also come under fire for, uh...
saying this.
Yes, part of the rise in LGBT numbers
is from people feeling free enough
to tell it to a pollster,
and that's all to the good.
But some of it is, it's trendy.
Penis equals man?
Okay, boomer.
Remember, the prime directive of every teen
is anything to shock and challenge
the squares who brought you up.
It's why nobody gets a nose ring at 56.
If you attend a small dinner party
of typically very liberal, upper-income Angelenos,
it is not uncommon to hear parents who each have a trans kid
having a conversation about that. What are the odds of that happening in Youngstown, Ohio?
If this spike in trans children is all natural, why is it regional? Either Ohio is shaming them
or California is creating them. Boy, you hate to hit the LGBT community
with, again, science that they brag about so much
when it matches their narrative.
Great point.
Again, Bill, sorry, but you've been helping with the movement,
not realizing it, but your politics
and this huge hit on the HBO show for years
helped spawn this type of nonsense
in my opinion, but better late than never.
Back in 93,
I would chalk, this is
Milnick talking, the fruit cup.
Back in 93, I would chalk this
up to ignorance and truly, see, everything's
ignorance because you disagree with
them. The word hate should be
coming real soon. I'm a hater.
Ignorance and truly believed education would help folks. See, we're real soon. I'm a hater. Ignance and Trudy believed education
would help folks. See, we're all dumb. We need to be educated. They're the dumb ones.
Would help folks to critically think and change, and it did. Okay, then shut up. So we have changed.
You know what? You're right. People were ignorant. Now we're educated, and you know what? Now you're
taking it too far and
they're calling bullshit on you but today's different and the alarm bell is ringing he says
you're ringing you're fucking the onslaught uh of attacks legislatively everything again attacks
in the media against our do you hear what they're saying this gay guy who leads the gay community, whatever, whatever his gay organization
is, thinks the media is against
gay... Yeah, we haven't had the gay lifestyle.
They've been ignoring it,
right? The media
for the last 30 years hasn't been pushing it
down our throat to the point where Carmelo
Soprano said 25 years ago
on an episode of Sopranos, what's with all this
gay stuff? That's how much
it's been ignored.
Can you imagine you got Disney, one of the biggest media fucking companies on the planet,
grooming people through cartoons, but they're against us, against our community. Again,
community, community, community. Goes well beyond ignorance. Here it comes. Ignorance, it's hateful,
goes well beyond ignorance.
Here it comes.
Ignorance, it's hateful,
purposeful, and intentional.
And you throw like a girl.
We need to wake up and be smart in our fights.
It's not enough that we control the media around the planet
and we're fucking brainwashing indoctrinated kids
all over the planet from age pre-K and up.
That's not enough.
As all our LGBTQ youth need us now more than ever, Kilnick wrote before calling on HBO to cancel Bill Maher. What you just said
is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it.
May God have mercy on your soul.
I don't have one.
Our father who art in heaven and I are.
Story. Story.
By the way, I got these invitations, emails from Louis and the
producers of the Fourth of July, the movie
we did. Premiere
in a few theaters.
One in Boston.
July 1st, I think.
At the
oh boy,
Schubert Theater. I don't know.
Maybe.
And then one a few nights later in New York,
at the Beacon premiere, which means I'll have to.
You know what it means.
Landing at either LaGuardia or Kennedy.
It's almost enough for me not to go.
But you see, I've been in show business for almost 100 years.
And it's kind of nice to be on the big screen in New York
and then take questions after.
Still thinking about it.
Fucking Uber my ass.
Anyways, speaking of cities in the Northeast,
one of my favorites used to be the city of brotherly love,
Philadelphia. Philadelphia.
The streets of Philadelphia.
City of brotherly hate, it says. A bustling
and again, a bustling
entertainment district. I've been there many times.
South Street. The first clubs
I played.
What were they called? The Comedy Works
in Philly on South Street.
This is 90s.
Now I play again in Philly at a place called Helium.
Not on South Street.
A bustling entertainment district turned into a scene of what, folks?
Carnage.
When multiple shooters opened fire in the South Street area of Philadelphia,
killing at least three people, injuring 11 others, police say.
Pass the coffee.
I want you to watch how they don't mention the race,
how they want this lumped in,
what just happened in Buffalo,
and what happened at that school with the school children.
I don't know how to prove it,
so I can't come right out and say it.
You don't find it odd, all of a sudden,
we had six mass shootings this weekend alone,
and that's what the media is focusing on.
You don't find that fucking weird.
I don't know how much control PSYOPs has on the internet
and brainwashing people.
I don't know.
But with this, they don't mention the race.
Multiple shooters. It starts with a
physical alter. I'm guessing black.
I'm going to go out on a limb. I could be god damn
wrong.
Just because they didn't say black makes
me think. And don't blame
me for that thinking because that's what we do.
We don't even mention black
perps hardly. Unless it's, you know, one
guy who sprays and they get them on camera.
Officers patrolling the South Street area heard gunfire and observed several active shooters shooting into the crowd.
Philly Police Inspector D.F. Pace said.
Philadelphia Police Commissioner Danielle Outlaw.
Oh, my God. A black lady named Outlaw. No.
oh my god a black lady name outlaw no she said to her boss diane welfare
who said said at a news conference on sunday the shooting started at roughly 11 31 p.m
the officers stationed on south street observed several civilians suffering from gunshot wounds
lying on the sidewalk and in the street.
Again, city of brotherly love.
The officers then began rendering first aid to those who were injured, she added.
Outlaws said five guns were used by the shooters after a possible physical altercation.
I'm sure a brother stepped on another brother's foot in the champagne room at fucking Glory's Nipple Hole.
One gunman was likely shot and wounded but escaped police.
Again, I could be wrong, but I doubt it.
She said another suspect gunman who may have been involved in the physical altercation
is likely among the three people killed.
Let's not call him a victim, right?
By my dickhead.
Yeah, exactly.
And by the way, their DA,
Haskner, or whatever his name is, Jewish guy,
he makes Gascon look like Strom Thurmond.
I'm not fucking shitting you.
You should see some of his rulings.
Larry Krasner, I got it.
The other two victims are believed to be innocent bystander outlaws, said.
Two handguns were covered at the scene,
including one with an extended magazine.
We have to get that into the article
because that's what they're discussing.
I'm sorry, folks.
I don't give a fuck.
That's all you've been hearing last week
after the school show.
Extended magazines.
We got to get rid of it.
Make sure they throw that in there.
There's been a lot of mass shootings
with extended magazines,
but they don't usually mention it in the article.
But now you're going to read it every time.
According to Pace, no arrests have been made in connection with the shooting.
Well, of course not.
It's not like there's cameras all over a fucking district
where entertainment goes on every fucking weekend.
No, none have been made.
None will be made.
When's the last time you heard arrests were made?
Can I ask you that?
Seriously.
Whether it's New York, L.A., Chicago, Baltimore.
When's the last time you said, unless they shoot the guy or he shoots himself.
At this point, we don't know whether or not the altercation that took place was between a group of individuals.
Yeah, it was the Eagle Scouts versus the Cub Scouts.
Or if this was tied to another group or affiliation outlaw.
Could you be a little more broad in your terms?
Let's take a look at the videotape.
Within about 10 to 15 yards of the shooter watching this person shoot into the crowd when the officer engaged that shooter.
You can imagine there were hundreds of individuals just enjoying South Street as they do every single weekend when this shooting broke out.
Yes.
Which I also imagine there has to be camera footage everywhere.
Doesn't there?
But again, it's hard to identify people with a, I don't know,
be a Yankees hat on crooked.
The three people killed were ages 22, 27, and 34.
Can you imagine?
This is, you're on a Saturday night enjoying yourself.
The 11 injured in the shooting are between 17 and 69 years old,
and their conditions range from stable to critical,
according to the commissioner.
The country is just busting at the seams.
What the hell's going on out here?
Oh, I don't know.
Outlaws said the investigation,
that's, again, that's the cop woman.
Outlaws said the investigation is in its early stages
and the incident was one of several shootings in the area Saturday evening.
Maybe you should be out trying to stop it.
It's not clear yet whether the shootings are connected, she said.
That's all you know? You don't know?
What murder?
Yeah, exactly. That's what Krasnick's saying. You don't know. What murder? Yeah, exactly.
That's what Krasnick's saying.
It's an accident.
Kid was cleaning his gun eight times.
Unbelievable, huh?
The magazine.
What did I tell you, though?
What did I say after it was at the Buffalo?
You think there's going to be more before the midterm?
Folks, I skipped over a bunch.
I skipped over at least three stories
that could be considered mass shootings this weekend.
There was another one at a, where was it, a mall?
Out west?
I can't even keep track of them.
It's just crazy out there.
It's crazy.
It's just crazy out there.
It's crazy.
All I know is Johnny Depp stood up to that bitch.
Now his commercials are running again and shit.
He really is powerful.
I like his commercials.
He's walking through a desert with his guitar.
Calvin Klein's fucking obsession.
I'm slapping canoe on, trying to find some fat divorcee at the bowling alley.
Let's move on to some more violence, gun violence.
It is, like I said, I skipped a couple stories that
literally considered, tactically, mass shootings. But this was an interesting one
that involved the gun. A gunman suspected what else? Can we still say gunman? It's not gun person,
a gun broad, a gun whore?
See how they leave that one alone because it has a negative connotation?
A gunman suspected of fatally shooting a retired county judge at a Wisconsin home
had a list of other people that he wanted to shoot,
including Governor Gretchen Whitmer,
Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell,
and Wisconsin Governor Tony Everett.
Well, I've got to say this about him.
He has great taste.
Because if I had a hit list, I'd move.
No, I like the auditor.
This chinless fucking owl.
He's as bad as her.
He's worse because he's pretending to be on our team.
Weasley fuck.
No, he's actually going to agree to some of these gun control things.
Whitmer, who we already tried to kidnap,
and four people got off.
Remember?
Never happened.
So anyways, I'm sorry this guy's plans were... Anyway, I don't want anybody
to die of disappointment. I like it. Again. Tony Evers, witness office and a law enforcement
source said, Douglas K. He'll do the other side tomorrow.
What is that?
He's got the face of an accountant and the hair of a fucking bass player for the sticks
and his... Douglas K.
Ood, 56,
who has not been
charged, is suspected. I'd charge him
on his hair alone. Guilty
of killing retired Juneau County
judge John Raymer at Raymer's house in New Libsyn on Friday. The Wisconsin Department of Justice
said in a news release Saturday, the gunman was found in the basement of the home with a
self-inflicted gunshot wound following attempts by police to negotiate with him. He's hospitalized
in critical condition,
the Department of Justice said.
What are you doing?
I guess you got to, I don't know.
You know what I mean?
Do you really try to save him?
I mean, we know who did it.
It's not like you're going to pump him for information.
I'd just, I'd keep him alive and torture him in the hospital.
You know what I mean?
I'd piss in his IV bottle and mix shit into his tapioca pudding.
You know what I mean?
Shit they did in Iran, in the Howard Johnsons.
Wisconsin Attorney General Josh Carl, oh, he's good,
on Friday said the shooting appeared to be a targeting act
and that the gunman had selected people who were part of the judicial system.
Is that right?
Counselor! Counselor!
How the fuck is Mitch McConnell part of the judicial system? He's in the legislature.
But investigators believe the gunman also may have planned to target other government officials and found a list in his vehicle that contained the names of several other prominent elected leaders,
a law enforcement official said named Gomer Pyle.
The other targets on the list which mentioned Raymer included Tony Evers, Mitch Randolph-Hartman,
somebody got me on a list, I hope it's for a blowjob, and Whitmer.
And again, I applaud the taste.
So why do you need a list? Is it like going to
the grocery store? Who just
writes down a list and then leaves it in
a car? It's just strange to me to have a list.
Well, it's a good question, Dallas, and I'll tell you
why. It's not like it's a long
list.
There's four guys on it. You already whacked one. Oh, Jesus. Who else was I supposed
to get? I had to get sour cream for the wife and eggs. Oh, yeah, Mitch McConnell. Tampons.
Oh, that reminds me, Witner. Fucking bleeding witch. That's a good point. Why write it down?
That's like, you know, the mobs just never write anything down.
They're doing an intervention with Christopher on The Sopranos.
Again, that's why I reference it, folks.
It's life.
It covers every fucking... The guy that's doing the intervention tells you,
the people that are intervening, to write things down
that you want to mention to Christopher.
And then they get to Pauly.
He goes, Pauly, what do you have?
Fuck that.
I don't write nothing down.
Polly. He goes, Polly,
what do you have? Fuck that. I don't write nothing down.
You've been a
fucking embarrassment to you and yourself and the whole family.
Ah, fuck
you, Polly.
I miss it so much.
Raymer was found
zip-tied. That's kind of creepy. That's right out
of Cape Fear.
Zip-tied to... Well, I'll tell you why. That's kind of creepy. That's right out of Cape Fear. Zip-tied to a...
Well, I'll tell you why.
He was zip-tied to a chair in his home.
I can't even get those zip-ties to keep
chips fucking fresh.
This mother got a fucking judge
to a chair in his home
and had been fatally shot.
The official could not discuss
details of the investigation publicly
and spoke to the AP on
conditions of anonymity.
Ood has an extensive criminal
and prison
record dating back
at least
20 years, including a case
when he stabbed his barber
to death after asking for a boy's
regular and coming out with a fucking wild witch, including a case when he was his barber to death after asking for a boy's regular and coming out with a fucking
wild witch, including a case when he was sentenced by Ramah to six years in prison.
Oh, on weapons. How creepy is that? Can you imagine you're the judge,
a guy you sentenced years back to prison is in your house now pointing a gun at you.
He was released from prison, his last prison stint in April of 2020.
It reminded me of the great Cape Fear,
only in Cape Fear,
Max Cady was upset with Nick Nolte,
his lawyer, because his lawyer,
Max Cady was charged for rape
and whatever, sodomy and all that.
And Nolte buried some of the facts
about the woman he was defending
um i mean the play he was representing she had a promiscuous lifestyle whatever and he hid papers
saying that and max cady found out about it and came after well let's take a look at my one of could you be there could you be there pause this is a this is after a lawyer that nolte knows
another lawyer who likes to you know play rough joe something brown remember the actor he's been
already dead now i think anyways he said we'll do a number i'll send two guys with a bike
put two pieces of pipe in a bike chain. So they come after Max Gaty,
like three big goons.
Of course, this guy's done the hardest time ever
and ends up getting the pipe away from him,
you know, beating him senseless like it happens.
And he's watching it from behind the dumps
of the whole thing.
And I think, here you go.
It's my wife and she's pissed.
Counsel, you loaded the refrigerator up.
There's ketchup on the couch.
I wonder if you're here.
Look at his legs.
That's blood on his hair, by the way.
Oh, fuck it.
Ah, fuck.
Look at Nolte.
Oh.
And my take on that scene is he did know he was there,
but he was smart not to, because
fucks him up, he's going to go back to, you know what I mean?
He's got other plans for Mr. Nolte.
And Juliette Lewis.
It's really creepy. Fucking narrow is as good as, so
we had him playing a southern guy like that. Hi, Lee, pulls up with his dog collar. Thought
this might be yours. He had already killed their dog. He goes, she's like, oh, thank you.
Yeah, I can picture that dog.
Big, fluffy dog.
All shaggy, laying at your
feet late at night when you're
trying to finish up them pesky sketches.
She was used to
Oh, God, it makes me...
Anyways, what the hell else is going on?
Is this another story?
Does it involve queers Anyways, what the hell else is going on? Is this another story?
Does it involve queers?
What are the odds?
What are the odds?
This is called What a Drag, this headline.
Am I correct?
You are correct, sir.
What a drag.
Well, let's get right to the video, I say,
and I'll show you what I'm talking about.
Well, I'll explain it real quick. In Dallas, drag show, I think it was called Drag Your Kids to the whatever the fuck,
that was actually the name of it. And again, more indoctrination. And Bill Maher's right. I mean,
years ago, there's always been drag shows forever and ship. I don't remember
parents bringing their kids to it. You know what it's really the downfall Nero's fiddling remember in
Rome all the ass fucking that was going all that shit a lot of fun for some
people but anyways let's take a it's like a sports show let's go to the Bottom of the ninth. You can do this. On the count of three, here we go.
One, two, three.
Let's go.
Game over.
Game over.
Look at this psycho.
Kid's hair's already green. Yeah.
Come on back.
Let's go.
Yay.
And the winner is
Scoliosis Boy.
Walk for me.
Walk for me.
Walk for me.
What the fuck?
Oh my God.
Walk,
Flores,
walk.
Kid's got the posture of a jumbo shrimp, a rainbow flag on.
He must be licking that fucking black guy's ass next to him.
What the fuck is going on?
You're disgusting.
I'm sorry, but the people, the far right, and you know I'm not religious or really conservative.
They were right about you queers.
Can you fucking imagine parents there bringing them?
Wow. Wow.
Wow.
That's a guy, right, Dallas?
Yeah, it's because the parents are mentally stunted
and are not even actual adults with no morality.
Yeah, they're emotionally arrested.
They buy into all this.
This is, again, comes down to the,
if you buy into the whole diversity,
you can't judge people,
which is
tent pole number one when it comes to being liberalism is don't judge anybody's behavior unless it's a white old guy but um that's a guy guy's got a nice ass it disappoints me
the hell's flying by my face anyways so you see that and then there's a guy confronting the parents outside of the
children's drag show in Dallas his name's John Doyle this guy cracks me up he's got the
the blow horn his first question I'm guessing it was rhetorical but uh
this sounds like something I would say uh watch the here's what I love about this. These people never get confronted in public.
The drag show queen and blah, blah, blah.
I don't care, folks.
Again, but when kids are involved, yeah.
You have a right not to have your kids subjected,
whether it's at school, whatever.
But in this case, the parents are dragging them
literally to the...
But it's just...
Watch them blow a gasket when somebody tells them how
they feel about their lifestyle, because they don't hear it.
As much as they tell you they're bullied and they're oppressed and all that shit, nobody
confronts them.
Not in this country today.
They're afraid.
You say, fag, you'll end up doing life in a Turkish prison.
But this guy with a blow horn, good.
I only have one question.
Yeah?
Why do you want to put an ax wound in between your son's legs?
Stop.
Stop.
We've got kids here.
Please get away.
That's the point.
Boss.
Boss.
Did you hear what she said?
We've got kids here.
Please get away.
And they're like, that's the fucking point.
We've got kids here.
Please, we're trying to groom in peace could you and
here you go it looks like a movie star anyways I like how cocky the guys with
the blow horn chewing the gum go ahead
yes we are what do you mean're not making America worse. People want to do it. Yes, we are.
What do you mean?
You're making America worse.
You're bringing your children to this event.
You need to go.
You are literally...
He says, who?
We'll pray for you, CD.
We'll pray for you.
Please do.
We'll pray for you.
You must repent.
You're in a cult.
You have to go to the street.
I'm in a cult.
It says the man's messing up rats. I wonder if the mama bear instinct is going to come out in three years when the mainstream
democrat party platformers they want to rape your kids and they're all going to think it's one big
smug little joke these people by the way understand that there is a bigger difference between 10 years
ago and now than there would be between now and in five years
when they're openly advocating for pedophilia like they've already started doing.
You people are the symptom of a dying society, and you know it.
You're scaring children! Shut the fuck up!
We're scaring children?
Shut the fuck up!
Shut the fuck up!
You're a child of murder, and you're not a real woman. Shame on you! Shame on you! Shame on you. Shame on you.
Shame on you.
Shame on you.
I can't take it. Shut that whore up.
My vagina's angry.
You ain't got one. It is.
It's pissed off.
See what they do?
They shout you down. They've never been
confronted. I fucking, that guy,
let's vote for him. Oh, why isn't this playing?
He assists his box.
Honestly,
what happened?
Anyhow,
son of a bitch.
Oh, that dirty cocksucker. Alex
Stein, another guy, confronts drag
queen after, it's another,
right? Another clip of another
you should be ashamed of yourself dancing for little children you should be ashamed
you guys dancing little children you should be ashamed of yourselves you're disgusting
think about what you just did okay that's, but you danced naked in front of little children. Stop.
You did.
You did.
Stop.
Stop it.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop.. I'm a whore. I'm a whore. I'm a whore. I'm a whore. I'm a whore. I'm a whore. I'm a whore. I'm a whore. I'm a whore. I'm guy goes, your mother's a whore.
And the other guy goes, that's okay.
That's okay.
That's okay.
She still ain't fucking somebody in the ass.
I mean, this is horrible.
I love all people, straight, gay, except these.
I hope they die.
What?
I'm just kidding.
I'm going to stop my own drag show.
It's where I drag gay people behind a dragster. What? I'm just kidding. I'm going to start my own drag show. It's where I drag gay people behind a dragster.
What? Oh, Nick.
Maybe we start with this guy.
Huh? Let's start... Nice going, Dallas.
Now, wait a minute. I had a weak moment in college.
Please give me a cup.
Please give me a cup.
Oh, good one.
Finally tonight, let's end on a queer note.
Since we started on a queer note. I'm sorry.
It's between mass shootings and drag queens.
Jesus Christ.
The Carolina Panthers, big news in the NFL,
have announced the addition of its first transgender NFL cheerleader.
And thank God for that.
Please give me a call.
I will not.
Not until I see you.
Justin Simone Lindsey.
You sure?
Look at that.
It looks like Terrell Owens with AIDS.
It's like a ballpoint pen.
What the fuck is that?
It's a turd with a bikini.
Justin Simone Lindsay has made the Panthers top cats chilling squad.
That's the bitch that beat me up.
According to the new squad members Instagram post.
Hers or his, whatever it is.
Cats out the bag. Of course it's not cats out of it is. Cats out the bag. Of course
it's not cats out of the bag.
Cats out the bag.
You are looking at the newest member of the
Carolina Panthers Top Cats cheerleaders
at Top Cats as the
first transgender female, Lindsay wrote
on Instagram. I don't know how I feel
about that. No! Take it easy.
Good for her. Good for him.
Good for it. Take it easy. I would him. You want to call it by its name, that's strictly for fags. Good for it.
Take it easy.
I would like to thank the beautiful and talented dancers who supported me along the way, alumni,
Top Cats, family, and friends for your love and support.
Please don't be offended when you see my giant black snake in the shower.
Good night, everybody.
You want to come in and remember?
I know what you did.
You're a damn pedophile.
All right, just get the hell out of here. I got a goddamn chance. Are you interested in the real story?
Yes, tell us more.
The Top Cats did not announce that the 29-year-old Lindsay was transgender, but according to the Spun, that's a publication,
noted that the squad knew that Lindsay was transgender from the,
I guess not too proud, huh? Chicken shits?
My goal is to create a team of individuals, this is the lady who heads up them,
that are absolute fire on the field, but are incredible human beings in the locker room.
Good friends and good people, and at the end of the day, lick each other's cocks.
What? Good night, everybody.
You have to walk through the door first to get to that spot.
Top Cats director, Chandaleeinette told BuzzFeed,
Oh my God, stop it.
What are you into that you would accept that freak?
Please tell me. Send it to horny old man at 71.
You who? I always say you. How many times people ask me my email and I go
qmc67 at yoohoo.com. Hi, I like you. Several NFL cheer squads have hired male members,
meaning dicks, but it appears that Lindsey
is the NFL's first openly trans cheerleader.
How this affects anybody and why you'd want somebody who has the physique of a fucking
lightweight Olympic boxer.
Lindsey did not post, it says Lindsey did not post, tell followers about, about, this is ripped right from the headlines, folks, and you wonder why.
Tell followers about trying out for the squad ahead of time.
I was so scared, Lindsay said.
I almost peed my giant bloomers.
She told BuzzFeed, there's just some things you can't post.
And then one of the other cheerleaders' dads saw this person and said,
You know, your son looks like a fag to me.
And a big fight broke out.
I'm happy because I was able to break down that door.
There is no door.
There was no door.
It's all implied that there's been a ban against transgender.
This is my favorite thing in this country.
It's all implied.
Like there's only five NHL black hockey players or ten or whatever.
It's implied they've been kept out of the sport.
Not that most young black kids chose something else or whatever.
One variable they focus on.
It must be racism.
Same with this shit.
They're able to break down that door and tell people, hey, we are not just sexual beings.
Yeah, we know that. Lindsay concluded, we are actual human beings
with two penises, a vagina, and two
nipples in the back of our neck who want
to better ourselves. I felt like,
why not tell the world, hey, listen, this
is a great accomplishment.
Ah, the homosexuals.
Great
accomplishment. We actually have video
from the sideline. We do. We have
video.
This is her
in high school.
Cheering.
I'm going to say something to him. I just wanted
to let you know I'm your biggest fan
and I will be cheering my jailhouse
boobies off of you at game day.
I appreciate that. Thank you.
Paul!
I appreciate you.
Okay, thanks.
I'm glad to know that.
Tracy Morgan is just a funny MF-er.
That is it, ladies and gentlemen.
I'll tell you.
What a show.
I think I have a touch of the queers in Louie's head.
That is it.
Don't forget to sign up monthly, please.
Could you? Please.
Patreon.com. Sign up at
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and
you can go to
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there. Don't forget
cameo.com if you'd like me to roast a friend
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Click on my profile. Tell me about the person. I'll make a little video and we'll have a little fun. That's it,
you guys. Thank you. I'll say it. You're very welcome. See you back here at the same time
tomorrow. Have a good day, everybody. I'm a man guitar solo Outro Music