The Nick DiPaolo Show - PC Idiocy Invades Space Force | Nick Di Paolo Show #541

Episode Date: May 18, 2021

American Idol finalist forced out of competition over social media post. Space Force commander relieved of duty. Peaceful religion shows true colors.

Hey guys, I want to thank you so much for supporting this show. Free speech will always reign here, and it's only possible because of you guys. After all the problems with YouTube and the social media shadow banning and shit, not only are we still here, we are expanding. By the end of May, and this is for certain, we will have this show finally on Roku, We will have this show finally on Roku, Apple TV, Amazon Fire, Android TV, and even an app for your iPhone or Android mobile device. That's right. Finally.

Yeah, fuck you, big tech. Who needs you? Not going to stop us. And again, I'd like to ask you guys to continue to keep those contributions coming. You're the reason for all this great stuff because it costs money to contribute. Just look for the, uh, contribute box on the comics, gym.com, or you can go to nickdip.com and click on the contact page. Again, thank you guys so much. guitar solo Oh yeah, how are you folks? Welcome to the big goddamn show on a Tuesday. on a Tuesday. Audience Member 2 in audience voice

Speaker 1 in audience voice Yeah, I'm right here, bitch. Audience Member 2 in audience voice I'm in a silly mood. Why? Because the fucking world's coming apart at the seams. How about them Jews and them Arabs, huh? I'll tell you, it makes the Yankees' Red Sox look like a real fag factory. I kind of like it when they go at it. I'm sorry.

I don't know. I know a lot more than you realize about it, because I sat next to Manny Dwarman who owned the comedy cellar and is from Israel. He used to teach over there. Smart as a whip. And he was a funny guy, one of my favorite people on the earth. I go, Manny, why are Jewish people hated all over the planet? He goes, I don't know, but six billion people can't be wrong.

And he's Jewish. He goes, I don't know, but 6 billion people can't be wrong. And he's Jewish. And the other thing, I might have told this before. He was giving me a ride home in his car one night, and a fucking, he cuts off a cab driver by accident because he's 80. He would look at me when he's talking and turn the wheel. And he drifted into another lane and cut off this fucking cab.

Cab he pulls up next to us us He was leaning on the horn. He looked like fucking He looked like you know Just the poster boy for Isis just as Arab and as mean and he starts screaming at Manny And man, he's just taking it like 30 seconds the man. He goes fuck you you Jew and a guy Joe you, Jew. And the guy went crazy. Jew! And Manny puts his window up and looks at me laughing. I'm like, yeah, that's hilarious. We're both going to die. That is a comedy club owner. My goodness gracious. Speaking of Jews, let's talk about American Idol in Hollywood. What that? You can't say shit like that. You can't. As you know, I'm a big American Idol fan. I don't care if that's corny or not

i'm telling you and i've never seen a crop of more talented kids this year in my life and um well the big controversy and here's why my instincts are so good it actually scares me sometimes about week two which was about three months ago uh the kid we're about to talk about a kid named Caleb Kennedy from South Carolina I think it was he's got a mullet and shit you know country he's 16 years old with the wisdom of Willie Nelson he can write it's scary how serious this kid and I said to my wife you don't think he's gonna fuck they're gonna let him win this this guy represents Trump this guy is Trump I see you don't think fucking that's my. I said this two months ago.

I go, I don't give a fuck how talented. That's at the level these scumbags work at. I really believe that. But then they proved me wrong. This kid came out in a Klan outfit and he's in the finals. No. What? Anyways, American Idol finalist, 16 years old,

forced out of competition because his buddy wore the strangest horror film mask that looks like a KKK hood in a home video when he was 12 years old. So number one, he was 12. Number two, he wasn't even wearing it. Number three, I don't think his mother would lie about that. 16-year-old American Idol contestant Caleb Kennedy

has been forced to withdraw from the competition over a four-year-old three-second video because this is what you cocksuckers on the left have turned this country into. Yes, you too, Bill Maher, who now shuns all this shit. You helped spread this type of fucking nonsense. Three-second video,

which critics, oh, it's critics now? Is that what we call people on Twitter? Critics? How about fucking fat pigs who couldn't get laid in either sex? Nick, this stunk. I know. I'm tired. Critics claim,

they say that the three-second video proves he's a racist because you wouldn't want to get to know a person first. Just judge him on three seconds when he's 12. Why don't you suck a dick and die, all of you, like your fucking master does, Jack Dorsey? So it says it proves he's a racist because his friend's wearing a white hood in the three-second video.

Yeah. I ain't making it up, motherfucker. Oh, yeah. Caleb, a country singer from South Carolina, appears in the video with an unnamed friend. We'll call him Donald Trump. I made a Trump joke. I'm saying that's what Jimmy Fallon would do. It was filmed when he was just 12,

and he uploaded it to Snapchat, where I have a ton of broads on there. They love me. I take pictures of myself with no shirt. I'm mowing the lawn, and these broads can't get enough. His friend is wearing a white hood with eyes cut out, which critics said was a KKK hood. Do we have a picture of that?

It would be a good time to bring the motherfucker up. Now look at that. I understand what the critics are saying. If they had just flattened that point out, if his mother knew how to make a hospital corner when folding sheets, that little point out. If his mother knew how to make a hospital corner when folding sheets, that little point separated, ruined his career. That two inches of Mike Lindell cotton.

But it's not even him. And they just watched the movie. Caleb's mom, Anita Guy, who I dated in the early 70s, has since revealed that the boys had just watched The Strangers, a horror movie in which one of the characters wears a white hood. As you know, see, he has no point. That was the key. The movie has nothing to do with racism or the Ku Klux Klan, and Caleb's mother insisted

the young singer never had a racist bone in his body, but again, he had a mullet, he had a southern accent, and you cocksuckers on the left who hate to generalize about people wanted to throw him right into that mix, by the way. But those explanations cut no ice with the online critics who savaged Caleb and claimed he was making excuses. Who the fuck cares?

You need to shut the fuck up. Can you imagine thinking you're morally superior to the point where you can judge people like this? Do you understand the only people who can call other people racist is somebody who's never had a racist thought in their life or said a racist term or laughed at a race? That person doesn't exist on the planet. Yet the left is convinced they are the people.

Suck a dick and die, all of you, you fucks. I stole that from Sean Hannity. So they were saying he was making excuses. I just want to shit blood. Let's take a look at the video that ruined this kid's life. Hello. Look at that. That's all it took. That's all it took. It's not the clan outfit. It's the paneling that bothers me. The teen posted a statement online. This is what broke my heart because this poor kid's generation just thinks they have to apologize for shit they're not even. The teen posted a statement online on Wednesday night apologizing, vowing to regain fans' trust. He said, hey y'all,

this is going to be a bit of a surprise, but I am no longer going to be an American idol. There was a video that surfaced on the internet, and it displayed actions that were not meant to be taken in that way. I was younger and did not think about the actions, but that's not an excuse, he said. Now, see, when you say that, you're almost confirming the critics' beliefs, in my opinion. He should have went on and said, listen, I was in the Klan when I was eight. I got out two years ago. I learned my lesson.

I burned one cross. I made it out of PVC pipe and balls. It was terrible. No. It's unclear if ABC asked him to withdraw. Yeah, I'm sure it's unclear. Or if he made the decision himself. Oh, gee, let me mull that one over.

You fucking suck. I guarantee it was a woman named Alice Goldstein who said, we got to get him out of here. Nick, what are you saying? I'm just saying. He also said he was taking time away from social media. I want to say sorry to all my fans and everyone who I've let down. I'll be taking a little time off social media to better myself. But saying that, I know this has hurt and disappointed a lot of people and made people lose respect for me.

I'm so sorry. I pray that I can one day regain your trust in who I am and have your respect. Well, I hope you're not talking about the idiots on Twitter because, you know, thank you for... The people who supported you, Caleb, and who like you and know you, you don't have to apologize to them. So who are you apologizing to, the jerk-offs? On Twitter, people demanded that he be disqualified from the show.

You see how it works, folks? All it takes is some fucking couple of douchebags on Twitter to spread this, right? And then what happens? Now ABC's nervous. We don't want to get this boycotted. But this is how it works.

They tagged the American Idol account saying, disqualify Caleb Kennedy. He's racist. Can we investigate American Idolqualify Caleb Kennedy. He's racist. Can we investigate American Idol contestant Caleb Kennedy's racist behaviors in his Snapchat that has surfaced? No idol should be a racist. Well, to you, I say this.

You listening? Your mother sucks fucking big fucking elephant dicks. You got that? Representatives for the show haven't responded to DailyMail.com's inquiries. At the time of those postings, none of the famous judges, Katy Perry, Luke Bryan, Lionel Richie, had commented, nor had host Ryan Seacrest said anything. Every time you ask about something like this, you get this. nor had host Ryan Seacrest said anything.

Every time when you ask about something like, did you get this? It makes me... Caleb, a country singer, was the youngest finalist at 16. The others are Grace Kintzler, 20. Willie Spence, 21. Kacey Bishop, she just got the boot. She was great. And Chase Beckham, not that you guys care about this.

Chase Beckham is a heavy equipment operator from somewhere in California, whatever the fuck. Handsome kid. He's already, he sang an original on the show. It already went number one in the country charts. I mean, he's that good. And the other, this kid, Willie Spence, big, heavy-set, black, gay kid who sang in the choir, probably got the shit kicked out of him.

He's got that, he's got a voice that'll, it's, and the blonde chick, this Kate, I think her name is, frightening voice, frighteningly good. So I have $10,000 on the blonde chick. Minus 15. Anyways, she's got an ass on her like you read about in Ass Weekly. It's like, not that that matters, Nick. But she's almost like, it's deformed.

She has a 22-inch waist. I'm not shitting you. And like a 78-inch hip. It's fucking weird. I'm sure the Black Brothers are fucking drooling over it, but not my cup of tea. I like the 14-year-old at the public pool, Timmy. Anyways, Chase Beckham's 24.

None of the other finalists have commented either. Why would they? American Idol judges have now weighed in. They finally grew some balls on the abrupt departure of contestant Caleb Kennedy, calling his exit unfortunate after a controversial video

last week. After Sunday season's 1970 final episode, Judge Lionel Richie told People Magazine that the decision to remove him from the competition

had to be made and we move on, while also recognizing the 16-year-old singer's talent. Is that how you recognize it? By not just saying he's talented? That's him being a chicken. Timing and comedy is everything. A lot of times we think about it, we grow up and we make mistakes

and we look at our life behind us many times and we say, God, what was I thinking about when I did that? Richie said of the young singer who left the program, won a video service. Say it again in the article, you motherless dinks. Look at Lionel Richie there, pointing to his life partner's big cock. And I like Lionel Richie. This guy's a decent human being. But once again, Lionel, you know what?

You had to walk the Black Party line. Seriously. You've spent months with these kids, you know? And you say, oh, he made a mistake. He didn't make a mistake. Unless you're calling his mother a liar. Why wouldn't you come out a black man and go, you know what? I know this kid's not a racist. But you wouldn't do that because you'd be calling Uncle Tom the rest of your fucking life.

Disappointed me, Mr. Richie. I'm going to have to burn my wedding album. My wedding. I mean, my wedding tape. A lot of Lionel Richie in there. You couldn't throw the white kid a bone, huh? Had to play the Disney corporate horse shit. That goes for all the judges.

That goes for all the judges. This was one of those situations where kind of give him a big hug from the three of us. Oh, that's terrific. That ought to take care of everything. You're a crumb creep. He says he has definitely, has talent, continued the all-night-long hitmaker. The problem is, this is one of those unfortunate decisions that had to be made, and we move on.

But this will be remembered in his lifetime, and he'll know what it was all about. What? Shut up! Shut, shut, shut shut shut shut shut up shut up that was him playing piano Lionel

on that little really he'll know what it's all about yeah he'll look back on it and go you know what none of these

motherfuckers could have stepped up for me prove that I'm a racist show some other show my this is the

problem man I absolutely believe what his mother said I'm a racist. Show some other, show my, this is the problem, man. I absolutely believe what his mother said. I'm sorry. Kid wasn't even, let me ask you a question. You think of the 19 years of American Idol, all the black contestants that have been on it. Nobody, nobody had social posts saying something bad about white people

or Black Lives Matter in the last few years or a picture of a gun and money. Sounds stereotypical. I know you're fucking laughing, but I watched the show. They did toss one black dude, but I think he was like fucking homeless or crazy or something. But really, seriously, reverse the race here.

If this was a poor black kid from the city, right? This was his big shot. Are you going to tell me they would have made a snap judgment like that? You know the fucking answer. They should have been a reverse the races. That's my fault. Yeah, drop it in.

What? Go ahead. You, drop it in. What? Go ahead. You want to say something, Matt? No. Oh, I thought you were going to say something. Meanwhile, fellow judge Luke Bryan, 44, told the publication that the decision was upsetting, an upsetting one, and wish Kennedy well. First and foremost, as judges, we love these kids, Bryan said.

We get emotionally involved in these kids. Judges, we love these kids, Brian said. We get emotionally involved in these kids. We want the best for Caleb. As far as the nuances on how ABC gets viewed, either way, decisions got made, and it's our job as judges to show up and do our best job and comment on the kids who are in front of us. But we wish nothing but the best for Caleb. It does make for a very, very challenging and upsetting week.

Again, I guess they have to protect their careers. But see, this is going to go on and on and on. Because if you stuck up for the kid, are we really living in a world where they go, that makes Lionel Richie a fucking racist. That makes Katy Perry a racist. No, but their agents go, you got to fucking toe the party line. Remember, we got the two-picture deal. Representatives for American Idol did not immediately respond to a request for further comment,

as usual, because they lack the cool bullies. I agree, Frank. You want to call by its name? That's strictly for fags. All right. Onward. I spent a lot of time on that one, didn't I? You know why? Because I've said this about that show, and people laugh when I say I watch it.

I watch it for the talent, but I watch it more so because it encapsules everything about this country. It just, they always have sob stories for the kids. Everyone has to cry on camera to get that pity vote. That's how some of these generations have been raised. Cry, fucking bring a sob story with you how tough it was growing up, and you'll get that pity fucking vote. It fascinates me. It fascinates. It's going to come down to the big black guy and that blonde. I think Chase, by saying that he's already got a number one album out, people are going to go,

well, he's got that. Fuck it. You know what I mean? So it's the big fat blonde girl with a beautiful face, by the way. And the big black dude. And whoever gets the pity vote. Is it the plus model or is it the gay black guy got the shit kicked out of him every day because he could sing like a bird? They're both scary, talented,

and so is that Chase guy. Enough about that. Now let's talk about the Brady Bunch. I've been watching this for a year. Well, this is related. In more politically correct news, where the First Amendment seems to be eroding under Joe Biden and his cunty left-wing radical Marxist pissants, Space Force commander speaks out after being relieved of duty. A lieutenant colonel in the U.S. Space Force who was relieved of his command told Fox... Can you guys hear that? Nick DiPaolo reporting from downtown Tel Aviv.

These bombs are going crazy. Anyways, the guy, the Space Force commander, told Fox News Digital on Monday, he is being misbetrayed online in regards to the comments about Marxism he made on a podcast earlier this month, and that he has received a private outpouring of support from fellow service members. Of course. Lieutenant Colonel Matthew Lohmeyer, formerly the commander of the 11th Space Warning Squadron at Buckley Air Force Base in Aurora,

Colorado, was ousted from his position last week, a development first reported by Military.com. And of course, the left ran with it and gave you the bullshit story. Are you interested in the real story? Yes, I am, Ted. Lohmeyer told Fox News he still retains his rank, but has been reassigned within the Space Force. The controversy came following

Lohmeyer's appearance on the Information Operation podcast, wherein he promoted his new book called Irresistible Revolution, Marxism's Goal of the Conquest and the Unmaking of the American Military. Lohmeyer said there is an ongoing investigation into whether his remarks or actions have been politically partisan, a claim he fervently denies. He says, I don't believe I was being partisan. It is not politically partisan to expose or attack critical race theory or Marxism, Lohmeyer told Fox News. The reason I say that is because critical race theory and Marxism are antithetical to the American values. Critical race theory fuels narratives that attack Americans' founding documents. In that regard, Lohmeyer said he was not attacking any political party or official.

I'm being misbetrayed online. I don't criticize any leader or any person in the Department of Defense or any elected officials, but I try to tee up ideas that I think are toxic, he said. In February, Lohmeyer said Defense Secretary Lloyd Austin, seen here, this guy is, you see all those medals and shit? Don't let that fool you. He's anti-American. You know that the minute, how do you know that? Because Biden appointed him and Pelosi

like in two seconds. He has said some wild shit about this country. How the fuck he has all those medals, you know, affirmative action apparently in the military. Because he's a dope. He's a fucking dope. I don't care if I didn't serve. I'm going to say it anyways. He fought the fuck for my right to say this shit. Read some of his quotes. You won't believe that he's leading the military. Defense Secretary Lloyd Austin III misused guidance to every service member, which asked them to stand up for each other and that every soldier has a responsibility to say something when they see impermissible behavior. Ugh.

Ugh. He says, we owe it to the oath we each took and to the American people to stand up against extremist ideologies, Austin said in the memo, according to Lohmeyer. So he sent the memo out to the whole military. He says, that's what I'm trying to do.

He told Fox News of his concerns regarding critical race theory. I'm talking about the guy that was suspended, Lohmeyer. He says, that's what I'm trying to do. So let me explain this to you real easy. The black dude, when he says we have to stand up to extremist ideologists,

he's talking about white rednecks from the South in the military, which there always are, and they're great soldiers for the most part. But he doesn't see black soldiers or brown soldiers who fucking, you know, believe in Black Lives Matter. He doesn't see that as an extreme ideology. He's talking about white soldiers from specifically the South or even the upper Northwest, but he's not talking about, in his eyes,

black people, black soldiers can do no fucking wrong so lomi has said this is extreme he's hearing all this talk uh marxist talk so he reported it and what's his for doing his duty what happens he gets demoted uh this is him talking about it he says it's uh he talks about how mark the language he's hearing is just Marxism in disguise. Go ahead. What happened is I began noticing some time ago, and not just in the past few months, but over the past several years, an increasing relevance of what I saw was Marxist ideology parading around by other names.

Yeah. But don't point that out. Isn't this creeping you out? This is where our fucking military is. Never mind the recruitment videos I showed you for the CIA. I should have pulled this cartoon they showed. It made me so upset. But it's a cartoon of a female soldier.

Black female soldiers. Saying how perfect she is it just you know we'll play it tomorrow it came out of the army as a recruitment tool or something this is creepy then he talks about on the second clip, he gets specific with the language he's hearing as far as this critical race theory. Here he is. In the past 10 months when I was in command of a unit, there were videos being sent out to every base service member that we were asked to watch in preparation for our extremism down days

and discussions on race in which we were taught to watch in preparation for our extremism down days and discussions on race, in which we were taught that the country was evil, that it was founded in 1619 and not 1776, and that whites are inherently evil. And so I speak up against those things in my book. God forbid you did that. By the way, that music was provided by Fox in the background to give it some more dramatic effect. I guess they were going to commercial. Kind of creepy while he's talking about Marxism.

But that's what they were being taught, that white people inherently evil. This is our fucking military. I'll tell you, I'm glad I quit the Boy Scouts when I did. Let's move on. Anybody can get me a slice of pizza. Let's talk about another

asshole who's politically correct. And this one will make the hair on your ball sack stand up. File Cuomo's obscene $5 million book under true crime. The woman who wrote this is Janice Dean, this article. She's a weather woman, weather person,

at Fox News channel, and her in-laws were in nursing homes in New York and were the victims of the mismanagement of Cuomo. So she wrote this. She says, we now officially know how much Governor Cuomo received for his disgusting and possibly criminal book, American Crisis Leadership Lessons from the COVID-19 Pandemic. He got $5 million for it. $5 million. Can you believe this?

Governor Cuomo writes a book congratulating himself while simultaneously helping to kill off thousands of seniors in nursing homes because he's a greedy prick. Seen here is him showing how big his asshole is. About that big. showing how big his asshole is. About that big. He was naked in the bathroom and his son came in when he's little with his mother and he said to his mother, Mommy what's an asshole? And Cuomo's wife pointed and said, see that round brown thing in the middle of your dad's ass? Everything but that. I took the cunt joke and I spun it on you.

There you go. Ever hear that joke? Gilbert Godfrey. A child walks into a bathroom with his dad. He says, Dad, what's a cunt? His father says, see that furry thing between your mother's legs? Everything but that. I told that on Thanksgiving to my mom.

She did not appreciate it. But anyways, but the joke was on us, Jan janice dean says and the nightmare is actually true janice dean author of a new york times article says my husband lost both his mother and father in separate elder care facilities last spring so while cuomo was trying to sell his lies on a page to the highest bidder a covid19 fire was spreading through nursing homes where our most vulnerable lived. Can you imagine? We know his health department allowed more than 9,000 COVID-positive patients back into those facilities, and we lost over 15,000 seniors despite his administration's lengths to cover up the true death toll. Cuomo knew, this is a great point on her part, the body count would hurt his efforts

to sell his memoir. So he and his henchmen lied, bullied, and threatened others to keep it quiet. It also looks like Cuomo used state resources and employees to help him write the book. Hundreds of those pages were based on lies, she said. My only hope is that this book that profited off the deaths of our loved ones is used in a court of law against them. Perhaps it could even be considered under the Son of Sam law, which keeps criminals from profiting from the publicity of their crimes. That would be actually great, wouldn't it? But can you imagine having the balls to put that out there?

See, when he was writing it, he didn't know that people, you know, obviously he didn't know this was going to happen. But after he found out that we found out, wouldn't you nix the book? No? Got to need that $5 million. That's a lot of free weights for your brother. A man goes to a party. Let's roll on.

No, no, no, no! Let's roll on. No, no, no, no! In our FLA segment today, a large alligator, I thought I'd throw a light one in there, a large alligator paid a blood-freezing visit to a Wendy's. What does blood-freezing mean? What the fuck does that mean? What does that mean? Blood curdling, you mean? Who wrote this? To its own? Blood freezing visit to a Wendy's

in Florida. That would scare the shit out of me. This woman was right in the middle of getting a Wendy's Classic and her ankle was snapped. Now, the six-long reptile chased pedestrians through the fast food restaurant's parking lot. You can show it now, Matthew. Don't wait for me. In Lehigh Acres, the county sheriff's office said, check this out. Oh, my God. Check this out.

Oh my God. Those things don't even pretend to look friendly. I fucking love it. That's a dinosaur. And they caught the alligator. It sounded like nobody touching me. Hey, you homos. Touch me. And I'll kick you. The alligator is considered homophobic,

so they shot him behind the post office. He may have just been hangry. This is the humor that they call him. For a cheeseburger, but he gave many quite the scare, the authorities joked in a tweet. Oh, they're so funny. The gator was also spotted across the street mailing a letter to his dad, then wandering into Walmart looking for malted milk balls, $1,000 for a buck.

Anyways, he crossed the street wandering through the parking lot of a rehabilitation center. Oh, what kind of rehab was it? I hope it was people on drugs. Just looking out the window. I'm telling you, I'm clean. In video posted by Lehigh Acres Fire Department, we just saw the guy, the alligator, wildlife officials said the animal was likely just trying to go from one body of water to another with its journey across Lee Boulevard. They said he should have taken the bus much quicker. Anyways, authorities were able to wrangle the beast,

and DeTrappa was relocating it to a Burger King, and then they'll move it to a McDonald's so all the kids can see. That's what they should do. They should bring it to a McDonald's, and you know that little play center where the kids are? Put that fucker up in that tree hut or that slide. Come on. Hilarious. Anyways, they're relocating it to a farm in LaBelle, Florida. What kind of farm? Alligator farm? I guess so.

Reminds me of a joke Louis C.K. did I used to love. Some guy, somebody semi-famous got caught using a racial slur and he said, and people were trying to defend him, going, he grew up on a farm. And Louis goes, what, were the fucking animals racist? Fucking sheep going, blacks! Blacks! Fucking sheep going, blacks!

Blacks! The cows going, Jews! Jews! There's a couple more I can't remember. We already showed the video of him, right? I'm really on top

of it today, I'll tell you folks. Let's get to some other news in other parts of the world. What part of the world is that, right? I'm really on top of it today, I'll tell you folks. Let's get to some other news in other parts of the world. What part of the world is that, Nick? Well, as they say, across the pond. You know how fucking alligators live in ponds? Across the pond. That would be the UK, also known as England, the British Isles, all kinds of stupid names. The peaceful religion showing its true colors sickening video shows someone in a convoy of cars

see how they don't mention that it's Islamic or no mention of it all just people of cars driving through London shouting fuck the Jews and rape their daughters.

It was not Pelosi and Biden, as people said. Boris Johnson said it was an example of shameful racism as opposed to that racism that we're all proud of. We puff our chests out when we say chink. What's he talking about? Anyways, they're yelling fuck the Jews and rape their daughters. Followed by this.

You know the translation of this? Somebody explained to me, a comedian who was Muslim, he's saying open the snack bar. We have video, right? We do. Let's take a look. Oh, God. Look, they give you a warning.

What a faggotry country. I mean, England, by the way. Yeah, look, they're being put. F*** all of us. F*** their mothers. F*** their daughters. I showed you the proof of policy. Shut them up.

Rape their daughters. If you have to send a message, I's terrific. That's England, though. See, that's tolerant England. England's been a socialist shithole for about the last 30 years. And this is what you get when you open the borders and shit. You know, they have no-go zones in London, Arab neighborhoods that you can't go into. Do you understand that? And there's Sharia laws and stuff.

Do you get it? And it's already starting here in Dearborn, Michigan. Look it up. But anyways, that's what happens when you have no balls and you don't stand up for what you believe in. So that was just a like like the like the article said that was just some people yelling fuck the jews you know amish and whatnot i guess the hell boris johnson tweeted there's no place for anti-semitism in our society

well apparently you made a place for it eng England. I stand with the Britain's Jews who should not have to endure the shameful racism we have seen today. However, he says, the American Jews, I don't give a fuck what happened. No. What happened to Boris Johnson? I kind of like them.

He was like sort of England's Trump. I don't know. It's kind of bumming me out now. I don't like your jerk-off name. I don't like your jerk-off face. Why? I don't like your jerk-off behavior. Why?

I don't like you. I don't like you either. Shut up. Suck it. Ooh. In related story, as far as foreign affairs goes, former Trump deputy national security advisor, Katie McFarland, who I like, by the way, because I did a Hannity panel with her, and she was on it, and during the break, she said, you're really funny, and I said, why are you fucking surprised? I wanted to bite her fucking forehead.

Anyways, but she really liked me, and that's all it takes. That's the self-esteem I have. Anyways, KT McFarlane argues the Biden administration has reversed progress on Mideast peace. Wow, you must be a detective. By restoring aid to Palestinian, cut by Trump. Trump cut aid to the Palestinians. As you know, Barack Obama and Biden put, what was it? Was it 160 million?

Or was it in the billion? 160 million, I think it was. Literally on a fucking wooden pallet, bags of money, sent it to the biggest sponsor of state terrorism on the planet. That's what Biden and Marxist Obama did. So Trump came in and said, what the fuck are you doing? And Trump said, this is why you black people don't run anything. He never said that.

Some racist said that. Probably that American idol kid, I bet he buggers it. So anyways, Jerkoff cuts that, right? So here's KT McFarling there, is it right? Oh, here's Joe Biden pretending he's the president. Go ahead. Palestinians and Israelis equally deserve to live in safety and security and enjoy equal measure of freedom, prosperity and democracy. And my administration is going to continue to engage Palestinians and Israelis and other regional partners to work towards sustained calm.

You hear me, Joe? Jill, do you hear me? He just said nothing. He just said absolutely nothing. And if you people don't follow politics, the left and jerk-offs like him always defending the Palestinians. They hate that the Jews in America work hand in hand. And they give you this line about oppression

and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Let me tell you something. I have a duplex in Tel Aviv. I've never seen anything anti-Arab in my life over there. I shared it with Harvey Weinstein. He got into some trouble, but I kept the lawn furniture. Anyways, now who's talking? Tlaib?

Watch this fucking hairy gorilla cunt. How she got elected is beyond my mother's tits. I don't think she did. Neither did Ilhan Omar. America haters. These fucking... Oh! This is the woman who said,

remember when Trump got elected, we're going to go after the motherfucker? Right with her kids there. It was like midnight. May she find the lump in her armpit the size of a grapefruit and may it be malignant and spread to her fucking eyes and ears. Roll tape. We must condition aid to Israel on compliance with international human rights. Look, she's pretending to cry.

And end the apartheid. We must, with no hesitation, demand that our country recognize the unconditional support of Israel has enabled the erasure of Palestinian life and the denial of the rights of millions of refugees. Really? H-Jews. H-Jews. She's a Malibu cunt.

Got that right. You are correct, sir. Got that right. See her pretending to cry? Huh? I don't fucking believe it. Ugh. I personally like the Jews. It's got nothing to do with me being in show business. Because I'm not anymore.

I'm on the internet. What? They run that too? I don't know. I heard the Irish and the Amish control all social media. How about Bill Gates swinging his big fucking nerd cock around, apparently? I should have covered that story. Kind of makes me like him a little bit. If you get that kind of money, why wouldn't you be buying whores and shit?

Imagine being married with that kind of dough. Are you kidding me? I would be having a line of supermodels. You know, the escort service, the real hot ones, where you pay like a thousand a minute. I would just, I wouldn't even leave my apartment and have a robe on, nothing on under it, take about nine Viagra. That doorbell would be ringing like it's Halloween. Just get my cock sucked till that

knob fell off like an old TV set. Then I get up and do it again. Back to the show. Back to the show. We have a clip of Katie McFarlane commenting on what's going on in the Middle East. Here she is. Well, I think that the far left wing, the Democrat Party, is holding the White House hostage. I mean, the White House is in a position where they don't have a majority control of anything, of Congress. And so what they're doing is they have to sort of bend to the wishes of these radical leftists. And what do the radical leftists want? They hate Israel. They're anti-Semitic. And so they pushed the Biden administration to reverse everything

Trump did, including in the Middle East. I mean, we understood in the Middle East, you could only get to peace if you cut the funding and the weapons sources from the Palestinian terrorists. We did that with the Abraham Accords weapons sources from the Palestinian terrorists. We did that with the Abraham Accords, which got the Arabs to stop funding the Palestinian terrorists. And with Iran, with the sanctions, we got Iran so broke, their economy so broken,

they couldn't afford to send aid to the Palestinian terrorists. So we were on our way to peace, but now it's all been reversed. And now what do you see in the Middle East? Predictably, you have war. Can you imagine Trump had that under control? We were on our way to peace, but now it's all been reversed. And now, what do you see in the Middle East? Predictably, you have war. Can you imagine Trump had that under control?

Seriously, I don't care if it was even for a week. But he had that under control. And jerk-off comes in. How much more proof do you need that they're anti-Israel, anti-Israel, anti-American? If you're anti-Israel, you're anti-American, baby. Because we have to have an ally in the Middle East, okay? And there's a lot of oil over there, I heard. Not just in the dirty Arab's hair either.

Said the Greasy Guinea. Anyways, that was KT McFarlane. And she better stop having face work done. If she farts, her forehead's going to split like a beanbag chair at fucking John Goodman's house. We used to be fat. Anyways, let's get to the next story. More political correctness run amok.

Showrunners for friends. Showrunners are the most important people on a sitcom, by the way. They are like the head cheeses. And there's Jennifer Aniston. See her? You know which one, right? From the left to in. Do you understand what I do to her?

Do you understand? I watch Friends. I don't even like the show. And I watch it on a... I just, her nipples, they must have kept it 11 degrees on that show. And she's, if anybody goes, Nick DePaulo, what's your type? What's your favorite? Bingo, bingo.

Even her now, but on Friends, that is it for me. I want to meet her. I don't want to have to go out there again and bring my ladder and climb over the hedges. I want to do it the right way this time. But I'm telling you, I would shampoo with her peri blood. Listen.

That was an angle shot. Can't wait until they play that when I'm famous. Showrunners for Friends, the reunion. They're going to do a reunion show. A Facing Backlash. Guess what? I wonder what it could involve. For failing to include any black celebrity guest stars

in the HBO Max special airing May 27th. Oh my God. These blacks, who knows where they're going to take the wrong way. Now let me tell you, right? If they did include black celebrities, right? What would that do? Blacks would go, why include black celebrities? Now you're just using them. You never had black people on the show, which they did. I saw a black guy having coffee in the background twice in 41 years. Now listen, why does it have to be, I don't hear, you know, you want me to believe that, let's pick a show. Oh, Martin Lawrence, Martin, you want me to tell me that show is for everybody, white people too and shit? And if you had a reunion, it'd be a lot of white people. And if you did have white people

in the show, they were the butt of every fucking joke. So shut the fuck up. This was about empty humor. If you can buy the premise that six people are around each other 24 hours a day and hang out at a coffee shop

with grade A pussy, why can't you believe it's all white? God, help me. These blacks. I know. I know it's really going to take the wrong way. How about they live in apartments that are twice the size of the house I grew up in?

And they live in Manhattan. Do you know what the fuck? Black people, just, can you fuck, and I'm not saying all black people, once again. By the way, my wife told me two great stories. I always brag about how integrated people are in Savannah. I can tell right now I'm going to forget one of them. From yesterday.

She was somewhere buying something. I don't know, but it was an older guy's business, white guy. Some young black guy comes in. He's like almost 80. The white guy, he's got something wrong with his legs. This black guy, like forties checks in on him, goes, bill, how you doing? I just want to see if you're doing all right. But, but, but, and he goes, I want to invite you to mass tonight to church.

And the white guy goes, you know what? I think I'm coming. Okay. But an hour later, she's in a store. She's like third in line. There's a white woman at first and there's a black woman behind the white woman. And the black woman goes, sweetie, your tag is sticking

out. I actually welled up my tears, my eyes. That doesn't happen in New York. That doesn't happen in Los Angeles. Isn't that sweet? And then, eh, black people broke into our house that night.

Listen, that is not true. I'm just saying, it's stories like that you're never going to hear about. My buddy, the cop, came up last couple weekends ago. He had to go to Home Depot. He bought something. He's trying to get it in his truck. Old gentleman can i help you with that i just never saw that in my fucking 40 years in the northeast i'm just saying and the point is the media the media has us at each other's throats and uh that's because a certain segment, mostly white liberal progressives, are so dumb that they think everything on TV is the gospel.

Anyways, in addition to the series' main cast members, Friends, the reunion, will also feature guest appearances by Lady Gaga, David Beckham, Justin Bieber, Cindy Crawford, Tom Selleck, Reese Witherspoon, and more, according to a report by Entertainment Weekly. Yes, so? Did a lot of black people watch Friends? Will you stop with your fucking horse shit? I, however, loved black shows in the 70s. Sanford and Son, Good Times. Fucking John Amos is my hero. I just think he's the epitome of a strong black father who would fuck you up if you didn't pay

attention. Anyways. Other celebrity guests include very white people who have no blood whatsoever. Celebrity guests include the Korean boy band. Oh, now, is this why they get BTS? Yeah, I get all their shit. I like their old

when they were four and five james corden big fag cara delavigne whatever elliot gould another big girl kit harrington larry hankin mindy kaling thomas lennon christina pickles christina pickle Thomas Lennon, Christina Pickles. Christina Pickles. Hey, you know who I fucked last night? Chrissy Pickles. James Michael Tyler. Who are these people?

Who are these people? Maggie Wheeler and Pakistani activists. Why are you going to have an act? Malala Yousafzai. None of whom are black. Oh, my God. You people, you white people are so close-minded. White power, one, two, three, four. Nothing's not my country.

Come down the drain. I want a bang, Jennifer Aniston. It's all the same. Yum, yum. The specials produces a facing backlash from fans after failing to cast any black celebrity guest stars. Who are they going to fucking have on? Yeah, let's dig up Flip Wilson.

It's been 17 years. Y'all still haven't made any black friends? Question mark, LOL. celebrity guest stars. Who are they going to fucking have on? Yeah, let's dig up Flip Wilson. It's been 17 years. Y'all still haven't made any black friends? Question mark, LOL. SMH wrote on Twitter. At least he put LOL. So that guy like was criticizing, but his heart wasn't it. Just caught a look at the guests for the friends reunion. Not a single black person, the Twitter user added. I knew all that talk about diversity was lip service. How do you spend your days? Oh, boy, you. Is that what you do? Sit home and looking for racism?

You fucks. Please die of AIDS. Wonder if any black people have dared to venture to the notoriously white New York City since we last caught up with the gang, another commented. I wonder if any white people moved into Martin's fucking neighborhood. Suck it. Friends reunion. So many new friends.

None of them black. So what? They have taste. It's a joke, everybody. Relax. Even my producers just left the room. None of them black. You know, that happens. I don't know if you guys

know this. People from L.A. and New York, you coastal elites. Do you know some white people grow up like in fucking Oklahoma and never see a black person? So it's all white people hanging out. You know those actual Super Bowl parties that don't look like a Budweiser commercial? When you have a white guy,

an Indian with a headdress, a fucking Eskimo, a Puerto Rican in a wheelchair, a fucking Indian girl with a lisp, a fucking hair lip. It's all white people. That actually happens in this country. And you know what? This party's Super Bowl parties where it's just all black people

and no dorky white friend like in the commercials. Do you get it? Do you get it yet? After convincing us that New York City has no black or brown people in it for nine seasons, they issue a reunion with 25 celebs and somehow evade finding a single black person, another wrote, good, why don't you take your own life

in the bathroom in front of your kids, whoever wrote that. Last year, Friends was revived, an all-black cast for a Get Out the Vote Zoom series. The cast included actors Ryan Michelle Beth, Sterling K. Brown, Uzo Aduba, my favorite,

Aisha Hines, by the, wait a minute, now wait a minute, Aisha, what's her last name? She's a comedian, beautiful black girl, I knew her in L.A. She was on Friends all the time. wait a minute. Now, wait a minute. Aisha, what's her last name? She's a comedian, beautiful black girl. I knew her in LA. She was on Friends all the time. Aisha Tyler. Yeah. So I'm sorry, folks.

You're lying about that. Aisha Hines, Jeremy Pope, and Kendrick Sampson, a bunch of big black names. So they did like a Zoom thing, only Friends? Did they call it Friends or Criminals? I was very confused. It's a joke, everybody. That's appropriation, by the way. Let's do

Sampton and Son, only all fucking white. All good times. Huh? Let's do it. Here's what I think of that idea. What are you, six? Yep. How old is the show, my friend? You are now at 56 minutes.

Oh, my God. And a related story, and finally tonight here on Face the Nation. Face the African Nation. I'm just a white man trying to get by on a black man's work. NBC, no comedy. NBC is loading up, get this, and this makes so much sense to me. NBC is loading up its fall 2021 schedule with so much drama, it's not funny, said once again the person writing the article who has cancer of the funny bone.

Literally, for the first time in the last 50 years, the network will start a season with no half-hour comedies on its schedule. Why is everyone so fucking stupid? Why aren't more people interrogating, like me? NBC instead of saving returning shows, Keenan, oh, thank God, Mr. Mayor, oh, I love that one, and Young Rock

and first year series American Auto and Grand Crew for early 2022. What a lineup of dog shit. Sit home and put Bic Lighters on the tip of your dick. You have more fun. The final season of Brooklyn Nine-Nine, that overrated piece of shit. Sit home and put Bic lighters on the tip of your dick. The final season of Brooklyn

Nine-Nine, that overrated piece of shit, however, will debut on NBC in August following the close of the Summer Olympics. The 10-episode run will conclude before the official start of the 2021-22 season in late September. Susan

Rovner, chairman... Ah. And you wonder why there's no comedies on the schedule. Her fucking, the rims on her glasses say, I'm offended by everything. Her haircut, part in the middle, like she's a hippie from 1960, says I'm offended by.

Her man face says I'm offended by everything. I. Says I'm offended by everything. I'm not kidding. This is a logical conclusion. This is a metaphor, a statement, a simile, I don't know what the fuck it is, of where this country's going with no sense of humor in Hollywood coming from the left. And literally, this is the product of no comedies.

Does she look like she likes a good comedy other than the rubber nose and glasses she's wearing? Susan Rovner, chairman of entertainment content for NBCUniversal Television and streaming, told reporters Friday the lack of comedies in the fall lineup doesn't reflect the lack of commitment to the genre. Oh, is that right? That's exactly what it fucking tells us,

Titlis Wonder. In recent years, our comedies haven't performed as well in the fall. Yeah, you know why? Do you know why, Miss Rovner? Because people like you hand notes to the writers going, nah, you're making the white guy look too smart in the office.

Let's dumb it down. That's why. It's PC horseshit that only you and your cunty friends in West Hollywood find funny. Nobody else in the rest of the country can relate to it. It's garbage. It's the same reason the Oscars and the Tonys and the Grammys

are losing fucking ratings by the millions. Because you people are out of touch. Now cut your fucking hair and put on an army jacket. What? So we're doubling down in mid-season with two big nights of comedy, she said. Isn't she a genius, huh? NBC will also use the big promotional platforms provided by the Super Bowl. That's the only way they can get numbers is platforms provided by the Super Bowl. That's the only way they can get numbers is elated from the Super Bowl.

And the 2022 Winter Olympics to help launch the comedy slate. That's what they need, the Olympics, to get it off the ground. What the fall slate will have is a lot of Dick Wolf programs. Oh, no. Do you know who Dick Wolf is, people? Do you know Law and Order that's been running for what, 40 years? This guy makes Hillary look like a fucking Klansman. This is how left-wing he is. Me and Colin Quinn used to laugh at you just throw on a law and order to see what color the defendant was

Colin actually went and did some research and he counted after 19 seasons I think I think he came up with something like 88% of the defendants were white on the show any show that takes place in New York City He came up with something like 88% of the defendants were white on the show. Any show that takes place in New York City.

Whack, whack, whack. Just remember that when you're watching Law & Order. I sit there for three minutes and I go, this is pure propaganda. It's fucking precious. In addition to the three Chicago shows on Wednesday nights, which involve babies getting every episode NBC is stacking a three law and order series on Thursday see they can't get enough of Dick Wolf the recently ordered law and order uh for the for the defense it's called at 8 p.m followed by season 23 of law and order SVU and season two of law and order organized crime they can't get enough of Dick Wolf.

He's like Goebbels for Hitler. He's the most biggest propaganda. You suck, Dick Wolf. So does your family. That's it. That's it for the show today, ladies and gentlemen. Don't forget thecomicsgym.com.

Please sign up there. That's where the show will be at all times. Patreon.com, nickDip.com. Click on the tour buttons. Find out when I'll be doing stand-up. I'm going to be in Myrtle Beach like two weekends from now. Can't wait. Bringing a bikini.

I love it. Cameo.com. If you want me to roast one of your friends or relatives, go to Cameo.com. Click on my profile. Tell me a bit about the person. I will make a video on my phone or relatives, go to Cameo.com, click on my profile, tell me a bit about the person. I will make a video on my phone, minute, minute and a half, small fee, and we can either ruin their day or make their day. I can be nice and say, nice haircut, Uncle Ted.

Good to see you in men's clothes again, Dave. That type of silly shit. People love it. That is it. You think it, I will say it. You're very welcome. We'll see you back here tomorrow at the same time. Bye love it. That is it. You think it, I will say it. You're very welcome. We'll see you back here tomorrow at the same time. Bye-bye. guitar solo I'll see you next time.